#a mysterious unattainable being

[misstycloud]

Yandere visual novel games recommendations

These are all free to download from itch.io on computer. I’m not sure if any of these could work on any other device but most probably not. Most of these games aren’t finished either and it’s the demo you play(they’re indie games created during, what I presume, is the persons free time, so it takes a while to develop) Still, you have content to play and it doesn’t end after just 5 minutes, I promise.

I will continue to update this post with new games I enjoy!

14 Days With You- by cutiesai

Here’s a link to the official tumblr blog

OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION: 🔞(if u like gettin very freaky THIS is for u)

"14 Days With You" is an upcoming romantic horror visual novel centred around Ren, a mysterious individual who seems more than obsessed with you — and is willing to do anything he can to have you.

Prescription:LOVE - by Livingslime

Here’s a link to the official tumblr blog

OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:

"You wake up in a hospital with no memory of how you got there. A kind and attentive doctor assures you that you will be under his care, patiently nursing you back to health. No one seems to know what caused your condition. "

The Kid at the Back - by Fantasia | TealCat

OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION: 🔞(behind a small paywall abt 5$)

"There's this guy, pretty tall guy, often times people don't even realize he's there but he is. Usually sits at the back, wears nothing but black. His eyes however, were bright, red as the autumn leaves, and they for sure aren't leaving your eyes once you lock with his."

Heart Cage - by rice love coffee

OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:🔞

You are a detective who has just moved to a new town. You are involved in a serial killer case, and three mysterious residents (Or more?!) are approaching you!

Don't trust anyone! But... can you?

Please Don’t Hate Christmas- (also) by rice love coffee

OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:

Yandere x Otome x Christmas x Urban Legend!!

You last celebrated Christmas a few years ago. This year, you returned to your hometown---Snowflake Island, with your childhood friend, Albert. Albert treats you so well that you choose to stay forever. However, you forgot something in the past, and it's still not solved...

(A/N: it was a long time since I played this ⬆️ but it shouldn’t have changed much- when I played it was really good. )

Pulsatio Cordis

OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION;

The popular guy meets a random nobody and inexplicably develops a crush on them. Sound familiar? It’s only the premise of 90% of the teen fiction genre. But dream no more. Your love letter, once a wishful Hail Mary, has been accepted by the one and only Liev Latané!

Liev seems unattainable 一 how can any sane eighteen-year old juggle being head student with being leader of the debate team and the school athletics team, on top of being a UN Youth Ambassador? But somehow, out of 150 students, he chose to go on a date with you!

Binary Star Hero- by Concrete Parasite

OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:

Binary Star is the country's top Super Hero. His light shines bright against any darkness... but the brighter the light illuminates, the darker the cast shadow becomes.

Discover who Binary Star is behind the mask.

Sunlit Grove - by Bingzi

OFFICIAL DESCRIPTION:

Burned out and overwhelmed, your doctor insists you take a break. What better escape than a retreat far from technology?

Help prepare for the local festivities with the overly affectionate Maverick, and do your best to avoid his unsettling brother.

Explore the secluded, self-sustaining town of Sunlit Grove, where the people are kind and a little bit too welcoming...

(A/n - this one felt a bit shorter than the the others but I still liked the vibe of the setting and the cute country boy love interest.)

[thealchemistbae]

Cosmic Clout: Astrological Indicators of Social Media Fame 📲👑✨

Disclaimer: This post is for entertainment purposes only.

thealchemistbae © do not copy, redistribute, or edit my content.

If you enjoyed this post, you can leave me a tip via PayPal at goddessguapa@gmail.com or via Venmo @goddessguapa. Thank you.

✨: Mercury - Uranus Aspects (The Digital Genius)

Mercury conjunct, trine, or sextile Uranus -> Quick witted, ahead of trends, and innovative in communication. These people say things others wish they could articulate, often leading to viral content.

Mercury square or opposite Uranus -> Unpredictable, controversial, and shock-value communication. Unexpected tweets or videos can skyrocket them into relevance.

✨: Venus in Aspect to Neptune (The Internet's Dream Aesthetic)

Venus conjunct, trine or sextile Neptune -> Ethereal, captivating beauty or aesthetic that resonates with online audiences. Could be a "Pinterest girl" or someone whose visuals always go viral.

Venus square or opposite Neptune -> Aesthetic is either heavily romanticized or misunderstood. Could face issues with online image distortion but still maintains an allure that keeps people watching.

✨: Pluto in the 3rd House (The Power Communicator)

Transformative words and an intense online presence. This placement gives someone a "cult following" on social media. Think deep, thought-provoking captions, tweets that make people overanalyze, or content that feels almost hypnotic.

✨: Midheaven Aspects to Outer Planets (Public Destiny Tied to Digital Influence)

Midheaven conjunct Uranus -> Sudden and unexpected fame, often through a viral moment. Their career path is unconventional and influenced by digital culture.

Midheaven conjunct or trine Neptune -> Fame built on a dreamy, illusory persona. Think influencers who cultivate a mystical, artistic, or unattainable aesthetic.

Midheaven square Pluto -> Extreme love-hate relationship with fame. They either go viral for something transformative or controversial, or they're polarizing figures online.

✨: 11th House Stellium (Digital Influence & Mass Following)

The 11th house rules large audiences, networking, and digital spaces. A stellium (3 or more planets) here indicates someone who naturally attracts an online following.

Mars in the 11th -> Aggressive networking, viral for bold takes.

Venus in the 11th -> Likeable, people want to befriend or copy them.

Neptune in the 11th -> Mysterious and aspirational. People project fantasies onto them.

✨: 3rd House - Uranus Connections (Innovative Speech & Online Impact)

Uranus in the 3rd House -> Unfiltered, unpredictable, and highly engaging content style. Their posts tend to either spark trends or controversy.

Uranus trine/sextile Mercury -> Naturally goes viral due to a unique way of speaking or delivering messages.

Uranus square Mercury -> Can have a love/hate relationship with how their words are received. One tweet could launch a career or a scandal.

✨: North Node in the 10th or 11th House (Destined for Digital Recognition)

10th house North Node -> Meant for public recognition; social media is often the catalyst.

11th house North Node -> Fame comes through networking, online communities, or being the voice of an era.

✨: Transits That Spark Social Media Success

Jupiter transiting the 10th house -> Major career breakthroughs, public expansion, viral moments.

Uranus conjunct Midheaven -> Sudden, unexpected fame (often through the internet)

Neptune transiting the 1st house -> A period where they become idealized, aesthetic-focused, or seen as a fantasy figure.

thealchemistbae © do not copy, redistribute, or edit my content.

I’m sure there is more but honestly this is all I have for now. Enjoy ⚡️

If you enjoyed this post, you can leave me a tip via PayPal at goddessguapa@gmail.com or via Venmo @goddessguapa. Thank you.

✨

[kleptokure]

Eyes On The Prize *ੈ✩‧₊˚

Shadow Milk Cookie x GN!Reader

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ✦ ‧₊˚ ⋅

Traveling came natural to you, as staying in one place for an extended amount of time led you to get fidgety. You cannot be chained to one mere kingdom, and you believe must explore all of Earthbread!

As of right now, you are on your umpteenth trip. An adventure to a place most cookies advised you to avoid, which is none other than Beast-Yeast.

But who are they to tell you where to and not to go? Spirit is hard to break, and you made sure to show them that. You trusted you would do a quick exploration of the geography, then check it off your bucket list.

Now, you fall flat in knowing why you were adamant this was a good idea. Exploring was easier said than done. The map of the mysterious land is not even complete! You set yourself up for failure, and you wish to travel back to regions more cheerful.

Alas, that option is unavailable. You find yourself disoriented, now walking along a trail while also uncertain of its destination.

Up ahead of the pathway, you spot a Barrel Inn! Quickening your pace to make your way towards the safe space, you feel the slightest sense of being watched all of a sudden.

Turning around to look through the eerie branches stemming from the trees, you find no one to suspect. Fatigue must've taken its course on your dough, so you dismiss the idea. The thought of a jug filled with cream root beer occupies more space in your mind.

Opening the door to the Inn, you see quite a few of patrons. It comes as surprising, since the lone cookie you've come across is some lazy caramel cookie who has the ability to change between cookie to chameleon.

You opted to sit in the furthest corner, as you would rather avoid conversation with anyone here. You are unsure about whom you can trust in a place like this.

Despite that, once you take the first sip of your given carbonated drink, a cookie takes their seat next to you.

"Hey, you!" They immediately spoke, a boisterous tone taking place in their words. It was clear they were inebriated from the audible hiccups that followed.

"Did you know that... there are beasts here?" That serves as typical drunken talk, causing you to avoid giving responses

"It... It's true! The beasts are real, and you might find one in these parts..." The drunk cookie expressed as if they knew you regarded their speech as imaginary.

"If you feel like yur being watched, then you're already their next victim!" That statement is what causes you to feel anxious.

Before you could ask any questions, the cookie left within the moment you turned to them. You were curious, as you still recall the moment before you stepped inside the tavern.

Then you sense a tap on your shoulder, causing you to startle. Diverting your gaze, you turn to see a cookie with milky light blue hair flowing down to her dress. Not to mention her mismatched colored eyes, which were a pair to gape at.

"I'm sorry to be a bother, but could you be a dear and help me?" Her velvet voice questioned, stating her rationale for the sudden intrusion.

"What is it?" There is not much left to do on your schedule, besides getting back home, which looks to be unattainable. It wouldn't hurt to assist her.

Although, you do remember the intoxicated cookie's words. But could the dainty lady standing near have much of a possibility to be a beast?

No, that sounds like utter nonsense. Your exhaustion must be causing you to find truth in that strange cookie's words.

"I fear I've dropped my basket along the way, and a few cake hounds decided to reclaim my carrier as their own," she said with a defeated tone.

"Surely a strong cookie like you would be able to assist me?" Her voice took on an unexpected high pitch that one would consider abnormal. Would it be a risk to assume she's flirting with you right now? Beast-Yeast never fails to live up to its unusual traits..

"Um... Sure. Lead the way," you accepted, much to her favor. There were little opportunities to finish your beer, but oh well.

Wandering across the familiar pathway, you decide to start up some small talk with the cookie.

"So, what's your name?" You asked, walking beside the cookie.

"It's... Blueberry Milk Cookie!" She sounded eager to make the announcement.

"Nice to meet you, Blueberry Milk Cookie. I’m [Name] Cookie," you stated.

"Even your name is quite grand..." she mutters to herself.

"What was that?"

"Huh? Oh, there's my basket!" Averting your attention, Blueberry Milk Cookie points ahead.

Preparing to fight, you stare towards a clear area, just to the right of the path you both walk.

But there lacks the cake hounds you expected to see, leaving you with confusion.

"Oh, looks like they left. Isn't that nice?" Blueberry Milk Cookie advances over to her basket with a casual step. Her demeanor so easygoing makes you find it hard to believe there were any hostile creatures here in the first place.

"Blueberry Milk Cookie... Were there any cake hounds here to begin with?" She can hear the doubt in your tone, making her hold back laughter.

Basket in hand, the lax cookie walks far closer than she should, pushing your subconscious to make you take a few steps back.

"Of course there was. What, do you think I'm a liar...?" Feigning her offense, Blueberry Milk Cookie allows a pout to take place on her face.

Her eyes, which you once found beautiful, now seem unsettling with the way they peer at you. A part of you does not want to upset the young lady, just to avoid any further conflict.

"No, I believe you," you reassure. A pleased smile graces her face, and her expression returns to normal, as if her prior abnormality was never here nor there.

"Good. Well, I'll be going now. Thank you for your assistance, dearie. Ta-ta!" Blueberry Milk Cookie plants a kiss on your cheek, sending a sweet smile your way after. Her way of a thank you, your guess. Now there sneaks a tinge of guilt for finding her strange.

You would let your suspicions go, but the way the cookie progresses into the trees like it was rountine causes to increase your distrust. There is no way any shelter took place in the direction she went.

It matters not, since you doubt you'll find any additional encounters with her.

Time to continue with your journey of finding your way home. Hopefully all of the activities from today are shut out from your mind by then.

Shadow Milk Cookie cannot help but giggle, the rush of another successful trick flowing through his dough. You are just the cutest thing!

Really, you did most of the work for him. All he needed to do was take on another form, one of a elegant cookie anyone would be eager to please, and you followed him like a sheep to a shepard. Though his more average traits did slip out nearing the end, you slumped in pointing it out. Maybe you kinda dig it!

He happened to stumble upon your presence. It was an accident, truly. Shadow Milk Cookie has far more significant matters to tend to, yet would it be so bad to put you somewhere on his agenda? Your appearance is quite to his liking. He cannot just leave you be on your merry way.

You would slot in perfectly like a piece in his puzzle of a Spire! Not alongside his other assistants, though. Perhaps something more, a relationship that he doesn't take part in often.

That could only be if you behave to his standards. Yet Shadow Milk desires to label you an exception just from the lone interaction you both share. Such a charmer you are, huh?

At the moment, only one of his morphs have been revealed to you. Said form leans on the tamer side, yet that will diminish over time. Shadow Milk Cookie wants to see just how far he can push you! How joyous a new toy can be.

Stalking you from the shadows, he can catch the look of lostness in your eyes. Another humble traveler adrift in the twists and turns of Beast-Yeast. What a pity.

But fear not, as Shadow Milk Cookie will be your guide back home. Remember to express your gratitude!

Though it is not your idea of home, but his, which is none other than his lively Spire of Deceit. No need to worry, growing accustomed to the tower comes within a matter of time.

For the time being, Shadow Milk Cookie will be peeping from between the trees, awaiting the ideal moment to stage his next trick. The jester wishes for you not to spot out the anomalies, otherwise his entire act will be spoiled! A few cards of tomfoolery in his deck haven't been played yet. Play along, why don’t you?

Your back is pressed up against a tree, your legs laying flat on the grass beneath you. Walking any longer sounds like a nightmare, due to the fact that your legs grow sore from the little progress you've completed.

With the thoughts of dread being cut short, you feel an abrupt poke to your left. The unanticipated touch jolts you back to life, causing your eyes to dash up.

The being that poked you was not a cookie, but a... cream sheep? At least that goes as your guess. The names of creatures in Beast-Yeast might contrast to those in Crispia, but it is still a fluffy sheep at the end of the day.

Inspecting the surroundings, you find there to be no companions with the lone sheep. Perhaps a stray from its family, just as lost as you are.

With more proper posture, you raise your hand to pat the wooly animal. The sheep releases sounds of comfort, pressing its head further into your hand. The fleece is the closest material you've had to a pillow, which brings you more ease.

The curious creature licks your cheek, a sign of appreciation from your affection. This claims the spot of the most enjoyment you've received in Beast-Yeast. Though that gets interrupted when you notice a certain feature.

This sheep... They have quite the pair of eyes once you pay attention to them. You fail to gawk this time around, as you believe you've seen more than enough of the contrasting colors in their icing.

The chances of heterochromia in a cookie is rare enough, but in a sheep of all beings? This is no coincidence. Either it be cookies with clashing eye colors are quite common here and you are just uneducated, or you have the right to be apprehensive because there is in fact something, or someone after you.

You find yourself having little interest in being here any longer, having gained a new sense of hope to escape this maze of a place.

The cream sheep is confused when the soothing touch of your hand disappears. Looking up at you, the sheep is only met with your figure sprinting away. How rude, you forgot to say goodbye!

Shadow Milk Cookie is left behind, an appalled expression plastered onto his mammal face. He cannot believe his stunt failed to work! He is quite literally, ehem, DECEIT! How can one not be filled with flattery to be given a chance to fall for his tricks? Such individuality you have... Or it just be his eyes, which are stubborn to change with the rest of his appearance.

A rule breaker here and there always entices him. You best be able to live up to your rebel characteristics. Shadow Milk would be disappointed to see you flop like the rest. The entertainer needs to be entertained every once in a while.

With a whirl, Shadow Milk Cookie reverts into his infamous appearance, one he's more acquainted with. Devoting himself into a being as small as a cream sheep disgusts him. Although there was one thing he favored about the animal.

It's common for cookies to give a pat or more to an animal they come across, yet it still surprised him when you kept the same for him.

Touching the cotton on his false form so softly makes him feel things; things he has gone without for extended amounts of time. Since, y'know, being locked up in that tree, all alone, with no other cookie to satisfy the buried need of another's touch.

Perhaps informing you of his pity story will bring you to tears, making you coddle him within the second fake tears prickle the corner of his eyes.

Such an imagination he has. For now, he corrects. If you shared such tenderness towards a strange sheep who popped out of the shady vegetation, then you should show no hesitation in sparing some attention for him, too.

Nevertheless, the animal act has grown rather boring. As much as Shadow Milk Cookie would love to receive more of your soft petting, the show must go into its climax!

You will witness the form from times ago, the one which represented his very deceit. Lucky little cookie you are, aren'tcha? Shadow Milk Cookie has grown adjusted to the dough, so he decided it would be best for you to fall in love with his face as well.

With your current state, hungry and tired, you have little hope in outrunning your stalker. The very least you can do is make this all easier for him by jumping into his open arms.

No matter, as Shadow Milk Cookie is already on his way. Hope you're ready!

There does not appear to be much reason in running. If a beast has dedicated their time to hunt you down, then what might the point be in trying to escape? You have no powers deemed extraordinary, so the battle conclusion can be guessed without a second thought.

As if on queue, a booming sound of laughter is heard from behind you. The noise sends chills down your spine, yet you are brave enough to peek around. However, the miscreant is not seen from your eye.

"Other way, doughbrain!" Now beckoning from a new direction, the beast seems to be playing tricks with you. Just great.

You rotate to face the other way. Even so, you do not manage to see any cookie.

"I’m over here!" With a heavy breath, you spin around to survey the area. And again, nothing is seen. You give up in finding the trickster. Staring forward, the very eyes you attempt to run from stare back.

"BOO!" Shadow Milk Cookie said, adding on a scare for extra affect.

Watching you fall on your bottom, the jester laughs, a noise that becomes more haunting for you each second.

"I’m sorry, I'm sooooorry! You just make this all too easy," he admits with his head tilted, making sure to lean in to see your expression, fiiled with fright.

"Wow, now that's a face! You really are adorable." With honesty, that did not sound as teasing as the rest of his words did.

Now remembering it, the apparently kind lady from earlier appeared to be flirtatious for a second. With newly gained knowledge, that cookie is also the one trailing after you. If you are correct once more, and a beast has a tiny crush on you... You pray you awaken soon.

With how panicked your mind is, you're surprised you managed to glue some sort of pieces together. Now you can only have faith that your assumption is the truth.

If so, then perhaps you can use that to your advantage? With pride, you would hold romantic affection for a beast, as long as you would not crumble.

"I... I look adorable? Well then, um, you look absolutely stunning," you stuttered out, trying your best to come across as charming. You trust you led your prior frown into a smile, albeit a bit shaky.

Oh? Due to your words, Shadow Milk Cookie is actually taken aback, thinned lips replacing his grin. A cookie complimenting their very predator? He must have heard you wrong.

"Huh? Whawasthat?" Witches. Was your pick-up line that bad? Oh, may you be granted a peaceful crumbling.

Regardless, you refuse to back out of this, even though continuing with your coquettish behavior sounds like a death wish.

"You have... the loveliest eyes I have ever had the fortune of staring upon," you idolize. That has to sound convincing enough, right?

"Hmmmmm," Shadow Milk Cookie hums, debating why a warmth flushes his cheeks from your unexpected admiration. Along with that, he floats himself much closer, which causes you slight discomfort.

Maybe a bit more than slight, as you raise your hand and slapped him, a gasp slipping from your mouth due to your own actions. Your instinctive reactions do not discern when and when not to react.

This is it. This is the end. You will fall because of an accident from your subconscious. Or not?

Shadow Milk Cookie bursts out with laughter, his palm touching the mark you placed on his face. He's incredulous that a cookie was brave enough to lay a hand on him! His guard must be far too low with you, though he might just lower it. Your attack wasn't all that bad.

"Hit me again, I like it!" This cookie, "Blueberry Milk Cookie," is messed up in the head. Who in their right mind would ever admit that? But you fail to speak out your judgement. It's far better not to.

"I think that one mark adorns your dough just nicely," you attempted to persuade. While you decline his request, you keep up with flirtations. Things may spiral out of control if you give in to every ask of his.

"Ohoho, how interrresting!" Rolling his r, Shadow Milk Cookie gives you a good look over. It is as if you grow more and more appealing each time he gazes at you.

"Even I didn't expect such a twist in plot... You WILL be my next rising star!" Wait, is he serious? Did you actually manage to seduce a beast? He may not be sane, that much is well known, but are you?

"I'd be delighted to act in your performances," you replied, keeping your voice steady to avert suspicion. Your words act as the sole thread to your survival, and you can tell they all come to please him.

The several eyes in his bizarre hair roll back, another sign if you couldn't tell he was elated by the wide grin covering a large portion of his face.

Shadow Milk Cookie hovers over, and this time, you do not hit him, allowing his hands to cup the sides of your face.

"I, Shadow Milk Cookie, hereby declare you, [Name] Cookie, as mine!" That sentence zones you into reality, making you realize how intense the situation you've somehow managed to tumble yourself into is. Any way out as an option is long gone. Too bad.

In your peripheral vision, a portal appears out of thin air. That must act as your way of transportation. You hope sickness is not complimentary, but that gets cut short when you're lifted up inside of the whirls of black and blue.

You hear the smallest chuckle before you depart. Might it be a good omen, or bad?

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ✦ ‧₊˚ ⋅

A/N: not too sure if im in love with this one (－－〆)

[lmnrrtt]

explaining why hashirama killing himself makes perfect sense to me, using all the plot holes to my advantage. let's start with the fact that no one talks about how hashirama died.

neither about a happy death in old age, nor about a heroic tragic tearful death for the sake of the village like they all love in konoha. there are no legends about someone who was able to kill that same legendary Hashirama or a mystery that everyone has been racking their brains over for many generations, no one just mentions his death. for me personally, there is only one conclusion here - his death is too shameful for someone who was deified and elevated to some unattainable god-like being. of course smth like disease can be considered shameful as well in the shinobi world, so let's move on to the reasons that could push hashirama to the decision to kill himself. the incessant war, the loss of loved ones, misunderstanding from those around him, as if it were normal for everyone to endlessly slay each other. with the only person who understands his desire to change the established system in which constant murders and war are considered the norm, they try to kill each other, despite their shared dream. but in the end, the dream came true and immediately ended with a nuclear bomb on hashirama’s mental health. defending the village, he killed his closest friend, the very person who understood him like no one else. dying, madara said that hashirama has changed and it's true, he is no longer the person he was in childhood. the dream of creating a village was so mixed up with the idea of ​​peace that konoha seemed to have become a guarantor of the absence of war, as if its very existence could protect from the horrors that the children of the founders generation went through. thus, the idea of ​​protecting the village rose above the idea of ​​protecting the loved ones, which hashirama clearly confirms both by killing madara and by saying that if someone else were in madara's place, he would have killed them too. he wanted to change the system, but became part of it. Here we can only imagine the backlash of the realization. deceased loved ones, constant wars, guilt, attempts to convince himself that he made the right decision, a feeling of helplessness from the impossibility of changing the world around him, because no matter how hard he try, cruelty will not go away. not to mention his habit of "suddenly falling into depression", which is presented as a joke and the fact that he already tried to stab himself, of course for the sake of peace and well madara, but not everyone will agree to this anyway. together with zero mention of the cause of Hashirama's death, despite the fact that the body is in the village and literally everyone has already dug it up for cells, the whole picture is sad. despite the idealization and deification by others, the unattainable half-god could not protect himself from the consequences of his own actions, thoughts and the influence of reality. as if it is even logical that the only one who can kill the god of shinobi is himself.

[gghostwriter]

Knots of Yearning

Spencer Reid x BAU!Fem!Reader

Summary: Spencer lies by omission or in which Spencer acts like he doesn’t know how to tie a tie just to get you to do it for him Trope: Yearning/Angst; think season 1 Spencer Reid w.c: 1.3k a/n: when i thought of this idea, i was thinking it would be some cute light hearted fluff but when i started writing it, it became angst, filled with pining and tension so I dunno what happened but i finished writing it and thought it would be a waste not to post my rambly written fic. I might write a part 2 for this just to close it out to a happy ending. Let me know if that would interest you. Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated! 💗

Two halves of a whole, the perfect pairing and yin & yang. Those were just some monikers that Spencer Reid had heard describing his partnership with you that started during the academy. He, being a genius in all things academic and psychological but severely lacking in the physical and combat department. You, on the other hand, filled those gaps—acing all physicals and being well known for being a shy but killer shot. Not to say you were lacking in the other categories, no, you came only second during written exams. 

So it came as a no surprise when graduation came and you both were cherry picked to join the Behavioral Analysis Unit. Spencer being chosen by SSA Jason Gideon and you being selected by Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner. 

The two geniuses of the BAU and the apprentices were added to the roster of nicknames.

Ever since then, he had traded in his standard issued trainee uniform to a button down and a matching tie—a tie that he badly struggles with or so Spencer made you believe. He didn’t mean to lie at first—didn’t mean it to go this far but by the time he felt the need to tell the truth, it had been too late. Each moment you’ve spent close to his space, invading it really, had become the highlight of his days and fuel for his nights. 

He often wondered if you catalogued his reaction just like how he did yours. Did you notice his staccato breathing just like how he noticed your subtle inhalation of his perfume? What about the reddening of his cheeks and neck in contrast to your trembling fingers? Or how about his eyes that convey his utter devotion as yours focus on any exposed skin in between his tie and collar? 

It seemed like a dance between him and you, to see how the other reacts and to figure out who would cave under the mounting attraction that had been building since the first ‘hello.’ 

With his choice of tie for the day hanging loosely on his neck, you would shyly smile and as if spellbound, he would shuffle to your orbit in silent plea for help that he needed.

Each glide of your finger made his encompassing thoughts about the mundane stutter into a halt. How his mind would then bombard itself with questions as to how the universe created such perfection. Each loop of your hand became vivid imagery of his own nimble fingers caressing your palm and all its engraved lines as if they contain the maps to all hidden mysteries of the world. And each tug to secure the knot transformed into a loud beating of his chest, encased within it’s cavity, with chants of waxing prose on how your very being, mind, body, and soul, call to his in a way that even his expansive vernacular could never explain. 

But no matter how much he wished for time to slow down for these intimate moments to last, it never did comply. So here he stayed, lying by omission—yearning for you to notice him, memorize him, and end his pining for the woman who seemed too unattainable for his clumsy, stuttering self.

———

 You accepted the lie well. Maybe too well.

The first time a blue striped flimsy piece of accessory hung around his neck, a sudden burst of courage took over, bringing you to a stop in front of his lithe, towering body and hands reaching up to whisper caresses on the silk to mold it into a secure neck tie that centered itself on his reddening neck—the color matching the one that bloomed on your cheeks as you realized what you’ve done. 

Your mind had rationalized someone as smart as he knew how to fix a tie but your body had moved on it’s own, having have spotted a once in a lifetime chance to invade his well protected space—the same way he had invaded your mind in every waking and sleeping moment.

That same chance turned into a routine. A blessing that you had come to look forward to, your steps having a bounce in them as you enter the bull pen and spotting a different pattern tie hanging undone on his neck every work day.

You knew, with no backing evidence that Spencer has to be doing it on purpose but didn’t want to spiral much into thought as to why he would leave that intimate action up to you.

Did he take note of every reaction you had to his presence the same way you did? The slight rocking on your heels as he inhaled your carefully chosen perfume? The biting of your lip as you felt his honey dripping eyes on your face? If he felt the same, you wondered why nothing has been done and if you had another burst of courage, would you have acted upon the tension? 

Maybe. Maybe not.

Maybe that was why you settled for accepting his poorly crafted lie of not knowing how to tie a necktie. 

It wasn’t really a lie if the other party knew the truth, right? Or was it a double lie now that silence has stacked between you and him? 

If you were being slightly honest with yourself, Spencer Reid had always fascinated you. Among the sea of gym built muscles during the academy, his gazelle stature has stuck out like a sore thumb and that intrigued you. How was it that a male, younger than any of his peers, that looked like he could grace a runway was in an institution that reeked sweat and masculinity? That very same question answered when you found yourself seated beside him in a profiler career talk. His intellect, that was why and although it seemed to alienate the others, not once did you feel inferior beside him. Rather, it pulled you in more. His quiet, unsure demeanor was the next to capture your attention. It was an invisible coat that he wore everywhere he went, sewn from years of bullying and ostracizing—similar to your experiences of having skipped a grade. Here was a comrade you thought and so, you silently orbited around his gravitational pull until he took notice and uttered the words ‘hello, I’m Dr. Spencer Reid’ in a low, trembling voice. 

You didn’t know when that same fascination turned into adoration. There was never a specific moment in time that you could pinpoint when it all changed. It just happened, one day you woke up and the past truth had transformed into a half truth—and the whole truth now being, you falling and yearning for a man who had a bright future in reading people’s actions but seemed too oblivious to the call of your aching heart. 

———

Morgan and Elle shared an exasperated look as they noted the two youngest members of the team silently flirting in the middle of the bullpen, yet again. They didn’t get how obtuse the two smartest people in the room were with their feelings for one another. 

“You think we should give them a push?” He whispered to his female partner.

Elle scrunched her face. “At this point, we might just have to confess for the other.”

And in that moment, another moniker was added to the roster. The dense lovers of the BAU, a nickname that the remaining members use only behind both the duo’s back as they become bystanders to what could be a match made in heaven. If only one would admit to the other. 

Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

[aethelwyneleigh27]

Cowboy!141 x Noble's Daughter!Reader (My Version of the AU)

(How you meet them)

Synopsis: Being the daughter of a noble is a jarring task as you must be always able to keep up appearances, so what exactly happens when your family hires 4 men? Men who seem dangerous yet you know nothing about, all happening to be part of the same group of people. What happens if they take an interest in you? Someone unattainable, forbidden yet also undoubtedly tempting..

Hi lovelies! Lia here again, apologies for the delay and inactivity, I had exams, projects and the recent release of part one of Bridgerton season 3. Speaking of the series, this was inspired by that and RDR2 (none of the elements are historically accurate, I think?), I genuinely hope this does well because this account has not been doing well as of late. With my mutuals leaving Tumblr and some friends are currently ignoring me, I genuinely don't know what to do anymore. From what I know, @ghouljams was the first one who created content in the cowboy!CoD AU but mine is a lot different? So please don't kill me 😭

This will result in headcanons for the next few posts because my brain is attached to this AU so you will be seeing more Cowboy!Outlaw!141.

(Really FEM!Reader, maybe also Plus-size!(Chubby??)Reader?? I don't even know anymore)

More content: My CoD Masterlist

Bless your noble mother's heart, although your was seen as this very respectable and intellectual man of nobility, your mother had this heart of gold having no idea that these rugged men he has newly hired were outlaws, criminals.. murderers?

Yet your father did, something about him felt sinister, well all noble money comes from not so noble cause.

Although your mother wanted you to get to know and be familiar with the newest staff members who would do all the gnarly, energy consuming and physically challenging tasks, she did not want her daughter interacting with men who would be considered improper like seemingly mysterious men who happened to be from a far town looking for a living.

Well without your father's or mother's knowledge, that rule was thrown out the window the moment you saw one of them carrying over some of the crates that contain given by some men to your father for his services and connections, particularly drawn to the one who never seemed to take off the cloth on his face.

Something about the way he stared at you, not seeing the rest of his face, depriving you of clues as to how he felt upon seeing the only lady of the house. You gave him a warm smile, for a moment you thought you saw his lips through the mask perk up, before walking off to the lounging hall for your tutoring on language.

It was odd, you observed them from afar a lot, your personal garden was your sanctuary and you can't help but do so when they talked so loudly, no sign of inside voices.

They called each other names.. Price, Gaz, Soap and Ghost. The man you encountered was named Ghost? Surely it's some alias. Well that wasn't something you should fixate on anyway so you leave for your tasks.

You find yourself feeling a little out of it after your lessons, hoping that a little stroll through the stables behind your family's estate would either help the information sink in or keep it shun out of your mind. Either way you'd find yourself in tranquil, you heard a thud behind you and turn to find so called "Ghost" behind you.

He had dropped a crate, one filled with weapons and uncharacteristically hastily picked up all of them without paying much attention. Such an action caused him to unknowingly cut his finger on one of the blades that fell out of it's sheath.

Your eyes filled with concern as you rush over to take his hand in yours before he tried to brush off the cut and get back to his duties. You knew it was dumb to be worried over something so small that the grown man doesn't even flinch and yet there you were, practically cradling his hand in yours.

A white handkerchief that was embroidered with your favorite flowers by your own mother, something you held dear and kept pristine.. using it on his finger to keep the blood from further gushing and wipe off whatever of the red residue was left on his hand.

As the blood stopped to your relief, you brought his finger and spontaneously pressed a feather-like kiss on the wound. You were so used to doing that for your little cousins, nieces and nephews that it was just a force of habit, your face flushed the very moment you looked up to meet his gaze, what possessed you to do that?

You placed the handkerchief in his hand and composed yourself, you told him to keep it and to bring the wound to the physician to get some antiseptics before running off to god knows where.

A few days after that incident, you meet another one of them except..

You couldn't help but rush, you were late for this supposedly short promenade your family has spontaneously planned. Your favourite gloves are no where to be found and with the three sisters you have, you checked room to room, seeing who might've borrowed the lacey white fabric with the sewn in bows.

Without looking your body slams into a wall, is it a wall? You softly groan, your delicate fingers brushing on your forehead that felt like it would bruise later on. Your eyes remained closed for a few seconds as the impact caused you to feel shaken, light headed.

You open your eyes to one of the outlaws, you blink up as your vision adjusted a bit, his dark skin against the light from the window really did something..

"Are you hurt, my lady?" He asked, his deep voice was smooth and rich, almost velvety. He held you up from falling.

"N-no.. Thank you, uhh..."

"Kyle, her ladyship can call me Kyle. Although I hope it's not too informal to your status, my lady." You smiled at his words, certainly a respectful fellow despite him and his group's reputation.

You felt warmth on your sides, his palms against the fabric that separates his skin on yours, he was only being kind for steadying you after you almost fell from the earlier impact but his touch felt addicting, too much as it continued to linger.

"Kyle, it is then" You said softly, suddenly a bit more aware of your surroundings.

Fuck. He was sure he felt something just by hearing the way his name fell from your lips. Normally he'd give people, employers only and only his last name. He was so used to having been called by "Garrick", he had no idea his name would sound different, so sweet coming from a pretty maiden's lips.

He stutters for a moment, realizing that his hands are touching a lady inappropriately, something only someone she's married to would have the privilege of doing. He swiftly removed his hands from your waist and formally excused himself from your presence with the excuse of his duties.

The next time you met one of them was through your mother's ball, she was always the first to throw one to bless the upcoming season of hopes that you, your sisters and brothers shall wed soon.

You had no taste for it after having a lord step on your feet at least 20 times and not even bother to apologize with how high of a pedestal he puts himself in, you found yourself escaping through the back of your estate to the gazebo in the center of your beloved garden.

You took your tight, restricting shoes off and felt the grass on your feet as you walked toward the gazebo, now close enough to see that you weren't alone but you still continued, your feet against the cooling marble platform. You sigh as you prop yourself to sit on the stone railing next to the stranger who was currently taking a puff of his cigar.

You turned your head away, you were thrown into a fit of coughs from the strong scent of the smoke while you swatch some of it away. You tried not to heave for actual air to breathe while the man next to you chuckles, making you feel irritable.

"M'sorry love.." his gruff voice whispers which make you turn towards him, the man offering you a comforting smile.

"Shouldn't you be in there with your family, miss?" Price asked. To which you hum, "I wanted some "fresh air" and silence" you answered. Moments of silence have passed, nothing but the sound of wind that rattled the trees a bit and each other's breaths.

You look towards the light of windows of your home, the ballroom filled with laughter and talk of celebration. You sighed, knowing you must return as your parents would come looking for you, also not wanting for them to punish you for sticking around unchaperoned with their new hires.

He knew you were about to leave, it would be rude for a gentleman to leave a lady without help, hmm? He wasn't a gentleman though, an outlaw, one of the worst titles one can ever bestow a man. He was considered to be of low honor but who cares?

He kneels down on one knee in front of you, gently taking your leg in his huge hand using his thigh as leverage so he can gently slip on you shoes. For a moment you felt his forehead on your knee before he pulls away and offers you his hand..

You took it hesitantly as he helped you off the railing, you look up at him meeting his eyes. Something about them burned, making your stomach churn but not in a manner of discomfort.

You watched his back as he walked away, his footsteps on the cold marble the only thing to be heard as the noise died down..

The morning after, you've barely had enough sleep, was it the events of the previous night? Nevermind, at least you had a day or two for yourself after conducting a proposition to your parents. Free time was worth it for the sore feet you had to endure.

Not really in the mood to change into anything tight or itchy, you remain in your night clothes. Finally, some well deserved time alone, comfortable and flipping pages of a book was your type of thing.

Sure, socializing has it's benefits however nothing beats your time alone or so you thought you were alone..

A table and a few chairs were set up by the servants to your request at the gazebo, giving you the perfect view of the greenery that you have planted the seeds of.

You had your head comfortably leaned onto lounge as you continued reading. Buts something was just so distracting, a few minutes of the constant snipping and twigs breaking, you look up wanting to see who was there tending to the garden.

Your eyes widened a bit, it was improper for a lady to stare a man who has very less clothing. Nothing but his jeans, belt and hat keeping his face shielded from the heat is toned, muscular and tanned torso and arms exposed.

A little later, you hear a grunt coming from the man, Soap was it? You can't quite remember much from the night you eavesdropped on them. You heard his footsteps on the grass nearing the gazebo but you didn't bother to look up, not until..

"Ma'am? May I stay 'ere a moment? Afraid the heat is getting to me" You look up from your book and sit up to see the same man breathless. You nodded and watched as he sat on the stairs, hands on his knees as he caught his breath.

"Excuse me.." You said, loud enough to hear and catch his attention, he looks back from his position. You moved one of the chairs to face your lounge, "Please invite yourself here, I can only think of how uncomfortable the floor might be, especially when you are working at a weather like this one" Signaling him to take a seat on the chair you adjusted.

He gets up yet reluctantly makes himself comfortable on the seat, you pick a drinking glass on display from the silver tray and poured some of the cold lemonade into it, you place it down on the table and slide it to him, offering a warm smile. Your fingers on the base of the drinking glass slightly brushing against his as he takes it.

He thanks you for it and you both enjoyed the tranquil and peace.. yet you can't go back to your book, asking questions and being further interested by the man each minute passes.

The way he talked was something else, it was alluring, comforting and oddly lively, he's told you about his "past" and how he used to be a child.

"Was quite the troublemaker you see, though my family was poor and food was scarce, I found a way to feed the street animals I adore—"

You look at him, so invested on what he was about to say next, it was refreshing to have someone to converse with who isn't interrogating you and practically forcing their ideals of how many babies they want you to birth for them, practically wanting you to die for them.

"I used to steal bread from my neighbor, not a very nice man, selfish really. So I'd often sneak into his shack, leftovers, scraps and anything light enough for me to carry. I'd bring it to Lassie, my favorite stray dog. You remind me a lot of her Bonnie" He said.

"I remind you of a dog?" You weren't so sure if that's a compliment, then again he just called you "Bonnie", what exactly does that mean?

"Home, you remind me of home. Can't say I have felt this comfortable in years, friends and I are usually reserved yet you bring this side out of me, Bonnie. So what spell or witchcraft did you use?" He joked raising a brow at you, for a moment his attention falters as he looks down at the soft mounds of skin exposed on your chest.

"Eyes up here, Johnny."

You warned as you laugh at his question, you notice one of the servants coming out from the estate and into the garden, Johnny smiles and tips his hat to you to excuse himself so that he could get back to work.

Well this is interesting.. isn't it?

Taglist: @wishesforyou @puff0o0 @simping4konig @simp4konig @blingblong55 @azereus @rustic-guitar-notes @snowdjinnofpalestine @09maruchan @anonymuslydumb @skeletalgoats @icarustypicalfall @ghosts-cyphera @connorsui @capuccino192 @miss-gms-and-the-rotten-womb @celestialhole @the-second-sage @starryylies @everlastingmoonlightsworld @keiva1000 @iexiam @drewsmusee @konigceo

[cressidagrey]

Lightning in a Bottle - Chapter 2

Summary: 

Eira Archeron was neither a Valkyrie, nor a Seer, nor the High Lady of the Night Court. She was actually pretty much useless. The only thing she wanted was to be somebody's first choice for once in her life.

Also known as: Azriel's shadows decide that if he doesn't treat his mate right... they'll just do it for him.

Warnings: 

Elain Bashing, Angst, Nesta threatening bodily harm, Amren being mean.

(super pretty dividers by @tsunami-of-tears)

Azriel was a lot of things. A knight however was not one of those. 

He was a bastard, a shadowsinger, the spymaster of the night court. He had fought in wars, tortured, killed, slaughtered, and bathed in the blood of his enemies…figuratively and literally in a sense.

But Azriel had never once been considered to be a knight. 

Not until he had met a slip of a human girl who never had the acrid smell of fear clinging onto her like he had expected. 

To Eira Archeron, Azriel had been a knight. 

He still wasn’t quite sure what he had done to give that impression…how she had heard Spymaster as a human and then continued to call him Sir when he had returned to the human lands to make his preparation to talk to the Human Queens. 

She had stopped calling him that at his request…she had been more than content to let Elain do the talking. And his attention had snapped from her, to her twin sister…flawlessly polite and beautiful. 

Azriel easily admitted that between the threat of the war and the worry of the future..somehow his attention had stayed there. 

And he hadn’t thought much more about the fourth Archeron Sister. 

Not when the other three had demanded his attention in a myriad of ways…from Feyre as High Lady, to Nesta with the problems she had adjusting or Elain, who had suffered beautifully and pined away for her human life. 

Eira…Eira hadn’t been anything to worry about, because she had done nothing. 

Hadn’t done anything but tried to be no trouble for any of them. And succeeded. No need to pay attention to her, because she hadn’t done anything. Ever. 

She had found herself work as a seamstress, seemed to adjust well to Velaris and her new Fae body…and that had been that. 

She was a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma…and Azriel hadn’t even realised it. 

He had become complacent… had started to have a fucking blind spot right in front of his face…and he hadn’t noticed. 

Too busy with himself…with his own overly emotional moping, because he had felt unfairly treated… and had come away from that with a chip on his shoulder the size of the continent and the mulish expression of a teenage boy on his face…

He had admitted that too. 

At last, he had realised it…at least before he had done any lasting damage, Rhys’ words rattling around his brain and seemingly dousing him in cold water. 

It had been an infatuation with Elain…nothing more. Jealousy about his brothers both finding their mate in such a short period…Feeling unfairly treated...

And Azriel didn’t even have the excuse of his age for it like he had with Mor.  He had been so young when he had fallen head over heels in love with her…His centuries spent pining painfully away were a choice he had made because Mor was unattainable...

So really, these days, Azriel had no excuse that it had taken that long…

Weekly dinners had been a tradition for centuries. And they were not going to stop with them now. Especially not with Nyx there now, who enjoyed the attention of everybody doting on him…though he had one clear favourite. 

Azriel entered the dining room to Nyx’s loud chanting of “Ra! Ra! Ra!” which was the universal sign that he wanted Eira to hold him and nobody else. 

Feyre relinquished her son with a snort, letting Eira take him and settle him on her hip, pudgy little baby arms immediately flying around her neck. 

He blinked once at Eira’s appearance…at the sight of her in a grey dress, high-necked and covering her from her wrist to her ankles, cut high at her neck. Not out of the usual for her. He had not once seen her in the traditional Night Court fashions of tops and trousers…But what did surprise him…that was her hair…

Usually, it was scraped back into a messy knot at the base of her skull…well, now it fell down to her waist in perfect ringlets…held back from her face with two gilded hair combs. Beautiful. 

She took her seat and he moved to sit across from her, like he always did… like he was in a trance, somehow so taken by her that he couldn’t help himself. 

Eira smiled at Nyx in her arms, bright, pearly white teeth showing. He had never seen her smile like that either. 

And then her eyes met his… that smile changing from brightly happy to painfully polite…

And with one look… everything changed.

Lightning crackled along his veins. Crackled through his whole body, his hands tightening into fists as for a moment he didn’t know what happened. 

It caught around his ribs like a whip, tying him to her for eternity. And Azriel could just stare at her, wide-eyed, as she went back to doting on Nyx like nothing had happened…

Everything inside him was rearranged, a place carved out inside his chest just for her…just for Eira. 

For Eira with her big silver eyes, her delicate little hands…

He had always liked her…liked her soft voice, and how she had filled the silence so that he didn’t need to say anything, do anything, but hang onto her every word…liked how she had made it so easy for him to be around her…how she had seemingly always tried to be helpful, always tried to be kind…

Finally! the shadows crooned. Finally, Master! That took you long enough! 

They had known. 

They had known?! Since when…how…

He watched in terror how a tendril of shadows appeared over Eira’s shoulder and waited for her to flinch back…but nothing happened. Eira didn’t even seem to notice it, as she was cutting food in smaller pieces for Nyx, feeding him, his blue eyes wide, staring at his aunt in adoration. His little wings fluttered against her hold and she adjusted, seemingly without a thought…doting on Nyx. 

Eira Archeron was going to be the death of him.

Azriel knew that already. 

Because it already felt like she was crushing his very heart in the palm of her hands…because everything he had spent centuries begging, pleading, praying for, was right there, sitting in front of him and ignoring his very existence. 

Eira. 

Everything he wanted…right there, where he had last expected it. 

“Az, do you want the salad now, or am I just supposed to wave it in front of your face for another five minutes?” Cassian asked him, voice dripping with sarcasm, and that finally managed to get him to function again.

“Thank you,” he managed to force out, pulled all the wayward shadows in his nearer surroundings to him with a harsh tug at their metaphorical leash and took the salad from his brother. 

Salad. Dinner. 

And then…cauldron boil him, he needed to…figure out what he was going to do with…

His blood was rushing in his ears and he was thankful to sit because otherwise, he would have already fainted. His heart was pounding in his chest, far too fast…worse than it had in centuries…even while fighting for his life. 

“Are you alright?” Cassian asked him carefully and he just about managed a nod.  “You don’t look too good.”

He probably didn’t.

“I am fine,” he forced out. 

Great even. He was…

Mate, some instincts inside him purred. Mate. 

Our mate, the shadows sang, so very pleased. Ours! 

He forced himself to eat. Even when every part of him ached for Eira to turn to him like she usually did during dinners…and start a conversation about something or other…Listen to her voice. 

She did nothing of that sort that evening, doting on Nyx, though her soft whispers to the little boy made something inside him ache. 

“So what else happened this week?” Rhys asked at that moment, clearly trying to start a conversation, something that didn’t involve Keir in Hewn City being an absolute pain. 

“Eira got her teeth changed,” Elain spat out and Azriel was so taken aback by that tone of her voice that he needed a moment until the words registered…until…

Eira got her teeth changed? Why had she done that? She was already perfect. There was no reason to change anything. 

He couldn’t help but stare at her, again or once more or…and he watched the blush rise high on her cheeks, see how uncomfortable she was as the attention of the table shifted to her. 

“You had your teeth changed, Eira?” Rhys asked, sounding as taken aback as Azriel was feeling. 

“I did,” Eira agreed, her voice quiet. 

“Look at me?” Nesta requested, two seats down from him and he watched as Eira bared her teeth. 

Perfect pearly white teeth. Uniform in size. No trace anymore of the two big incisors that had sat inside her mouth. They had been just a smidgen too big for her. It had been charming as far as he was concerned.  But now they were all…all perfectly even. 

“It looks great,“ Nesta said. “But they were fine before as well.” A sort of understanding passed between Nesta and Eira, a look between the same grey eyes they shared that Azriel didn’t understand but wished he would

“I like it more like this,” Eira admitted, her voice quiet, going back to take care of Nyx. Nesta inclined her head. 

“Then that’s all that matters.” And that was that.

As long as she was happy, Azriel couldn’t care less. If she liked this more, then she should have whatever made her happy. 

“You actually agree with her? Nesta!” Elain exclaimed and Nesta stared at Elain, lips pursing for once, seemingly disagreeing with her sister. 

“They are Eira’s teeth,” Nesta said with a shrug.  “As long as they are attached to her mouth, I think she can do whatever she wants with them.”

Azriel tended to agree. Her teeth. If she liked them like that…well, that was that then. 

“You should have had them made into fangs. You could use them, Girl,” Amren commented drily. 

Eira said nothing in response, her shoulders seemingly caving in. 

His shadows bristled so sharply that he nearly flinched, hissing quietly, Our Mate. Our Mate! She doesn’t need fangs, but the tiny ancient one needs her throat ripped out!

He glared at them, but they ignored that. Instead, some of them bitched under their breath about anything Elain had to say…while some others were waxing poetically about the gleam of Eira’s hair in the candlelight. 

So beautiful, they purred in his ear.  So pretty. Doesn’t her hair glow like gold like this? Like a halo…

It was decisively unhelpful. Even when they were right. 

Especially because it frayed what little self-control he had. What little self-control he had that stopped him from going on his knees before her right now and begging her for…something, anything…everything. 

His ruined hands curled into fists as the shadows continued with their little monologue. 

Nyx seemed to be content to tuck his head against Eira’s shoulder and play with one big ringlet of that gleaming hair as he fell asleep, yawning widely. 

That seemed to be all the excuse Eira needed as she stood up. “I’ll put him to sleep,” Eira offered quietly as she stood. She hadn’t said a single word that evening unless it was talking to Nyx or Nesta asking her a question. Had stayed quiet. Silent. 

He missed her voice. 

He couldn’t stop the shadows from rushing out to pull her chair back so that it made no noise, fighting with them for control as they insisted on clinging to her skirts. “I’ll be up early tomorrow…I thought I could take Nyx to that playground he likes,” Eira said at that moment looking at Feyre and Rhys.  

“Of course,” Feyre agreed with an indulging smile. “He loves the swing there.”

Eira left and he watched her go, trying to swallow and trying and failing his shadows from following along in one big massive cloud…

“Az, what was that?” Rhys asked with some amusement but he couldn’t bring out the words. Couldn’t say anything…could just pull open his metal shields and push it at Rhys, begging him to understand. 

His brother’s eyes widened in pure undiluted shock. 

*By the cauldron,* he breathed in Azriel’s mind. 

“Are you both alright?” Cassian demanded, the shock being obvious on Rhys’ face. 

*Congratulations, brother,* Rhys said quietly in his mind, carefully. *I hope this isn’t…unwelcome?*

Unwelcome? How could this be unwelcome? 

This was…This was everything he had ever wanted. 

“Yes,” Rhys said, clearing his throat. “I am fine, and Az will be… alright.” 

Oh, he would be. He would be more than alright. He just…needed to...He pressed a hand against his chest, feeling his heart thump against the touch. 

“You sure about that?” Cassian asked drily. “You look a bit green around the gills, Az. How are you feeling?” 

“Like somebody is carving up my chest,” he managed to bring out. 

It was the truth. That mating bond was like a razor wire, tied around his ribcage, sharp and painful. He wasn't sure if that was even normal or if that was just him trying to get used to it, if it was, just the shock that finally he had a mating bond himself or...

“Well, that sounds healthy,” Cassian said sharply, reaching out with one broad hand to put it on Azriel’s shoulder and squeezing. Warm, solid…giving him something to concentrate on. 

“Give him a moment,” Rhys said with a pointed look. “He’ll be fine once he catches his breath.”

He just needed...

She's fine, Master, the shadows assured him. Just singing the Princeling to sleep. 

“You want some water?” Nesta asked, already moving to stand. 

“What the fuck is going on?” Cassian demanded, his voice sharp.

He had no idea what he was supposed to say. 

“The mating bond snapped for him,” Amren drawled drily. “He’s just being dramatic about it.”

Dramatic? He was being dramatic? 

Azriel hadn’t thought he would get this for half a millennium! 

*Careful, Az,* Rhys said into his mind. *She does not mean it like that.*

He harshly pulled at the shadows that had been striking out on their own, getting ready to make their displeasure known to Amren. 

“What? To whom? You?” Cassian asked, the hand tightening nearly painfully. 

“If that was the case, I would be utterly uninterested,” Amren said with a snort. “But I imagine.. it must be Eira.” 

It was deathly quiet in the room after that declaration, all the eyes on him. 

Elain broke the stifling silence. 

“Is that a joke?” She asked, sounding utterly aghast. “Your mate is Eira?”

He couldn’t help the snarl that broke out of his throat, Cassian's grip turning from supportive to warning in an instant, the shadows poising themselves to attack. 

“Careful,” Rhys said quietly. “His instincts are primed. And his control is…not what it should be right now.”

*Reign it in, Az. Nobody is going to take her from you,* Rhys warned him. 

“We are all just…surprised!” Mor hurried to add, exchanging a look with Feyre next to her, who was paling rapidly. “Congrats! She has been having a crush on you for years!” 

What?

“Oh gods,” Feyre murmured under her breath.“I…I may have really messed up,” she admitted with a grimace. 

Not exactly what Azriel wanted to hear. 

A glance was exchanged between Rhys and Feyre. 

“You told her to get over her crush?” Rhys said surprised, blinking once. Feyre just nodded. “When?”

“2 days ago? After she got her teeth changed…I thought she only did it for Azriel,” Feyre admitted quietly. 

“Why would you do that, Feyre?!” Nesta demanded sharply. 

“Were you trying to protect Azriel’s virtue?” Cassian asked with a snort, trying to find some levity in that situation even when Azriel was starting to get furious.  “Don’t worry, there is nothing left for you to protect.”

“I didn’t want there to be any problems. And she was annoying you at every dinner,” Feyre tried to explain. His eyebrows rose nearly to his hairline. 

“Annoying me?” He repeated, unable to believe what he was hearing. “She wasn’t annoying me!” 

“Making you uncomfortable then,” Elain amended quickly. “She talked to you constantly.” 

Yes. And it had never bothered him one bit. 

He would rather just listen to her talk, to one person talking, than to take part in the loud and raucous conversations that could go on for hours. 

If anything…he had welcomed it as a respite. In Eira’s little world, there weren’t really any…there were no bloodyproblems to take care of,  no weapons…she talked about embroidery and fabrics and books she had been reading…her world was so soft. 

“If that bothered me, I would have said something,” he bit out. He didn’t need Feyre to protect his virtue. Or Elain. Or anybody else. 

“I thought you would be too polite for that,” Feyre admitted with a grimace. Before he could respond, Elain beat him to it. 

“Does it even matter?” She asked, crossing her arms as she stood. “It’s Eira. It’s not like you’ll actually want her,” she said with a roll of her eyes. “I’ll be upstairs.”

It was pure shock that kept him rooted to his chair. Pure shock that stopped him from lunging across the table, at Elain’s throat because how dare she?!

The shadows hissed, spitting mad, whirling around him, a mess of voices, bombarding him with suggestions of what he should do about this, about that kind of disrespect to his mate. 

Want her? He didn't just want her, he needed her!

To his surprise, it was Nesta, Nesta of all people who slammed her hands onto the table, who stared him down with sparkling grey eyes, steel in them. 

It wasn't Nesta who stared him down. It was Lady Death herself.  “You lay one finger on Eira where she doesn’t want it and I’ll hack off your fucking hands!” She snapped at Azriel. 

He swallowed. He could only incline his head in response.

“We’ll deal with all of this tomorrow,” Rhys pointedly, with a sigh, making an executive decision. “After our visit to the Hewn City.”

*Can I trust you not to tell her for one night?* he asked Azriel mentally. *Let Feyre talk to her first and apologise?*

 *Tommorow,* he agreed. He didn’t want to tell her now…not when she was tired and wanting to sleep. Tomorrow. 

Still, without a conscious thought he sent the shadows to check on her…finding her up in her room, getting ready for bed. 

Safe. Content. 

His. 

[vampiriito]

Summer was due for another thank you.. (JJ Maybank X shy! kook! reader ) Chapter 6

A/N: Hey loves! valentine's day special hehe ;), we're finally getting something from these two, like.. it was about damn time.

Summary: After JJ ends up spending the night in your bed and in your arms, he promises himself he's not gonna crush on someone as unattainable as you, but the universe has other plans on how his night at the kegger ends.

Maisy was convinced JJ was ignoring you after that night because he was scared of his feelings, that had to be it in the mind of the strawberry blonde. Her voice boomed excitedly through the speaker of your poor phone as you got ready unenthused, gesturing wildly as if she was right there in your room, and not on a facetime call, by the pool and in another city surrounded by other people. You had promised, no—swore that you wouldn't listen to her stupid ideas and advice. Her life was chaotic and her guardian angel probably needed a cigarette after every decision she took.

But here you were, standing awkwardly on the edge of the Boneyard, your eyes scanning the people having fun at the kegger. This kept getting stranger, and quite frankly pathetic for you..

Since JJ had slept over at your house, after the fight with his dad, almost a week ago; you couldn't help but feel like the interaction had been left unfinished in a way. But as you stood there glancing around at the couples and friend groups which were already drunk, despite it being very early, you couldn't help but feel like it was a bad idea. Your fingers were fidgeting with the hem of your sage green satin summer dress, sparing an almost disgusted glance down at the soft fabric adorned with small pink flowers. 'I should've stayed home' you thought, your mind already writhing in social anxiety. He obviously had no interest in talking to you after the whole strange ordeal of waking up in your room and in your arms save for the occasional smile and wave (which was probably from politeness now that you thought about it), so why were you here?

The sun had just dipped below the horizon, casting a warm, golden glow over the sandy beach. The sky was a canvas of swirling purples, pinks, and deep blues, with stars beginning to twinkle as the night settled in. A large bonfire crackled at the center of the gathering, its flames dancing and casting flickering light on the faces of those gathered around. The bonfire was the heart of the event, providing warmth and a focal point for the evening's activities.

Beach blankets and towels were spread out in a semi-circle around the fire, with groups of friends lounging on them, laughing, and sharing stories. Coolers and portable speakers were scattered throughout the area, playing a mix of R&B music and the occasional pop song that added to the lively atmosphere. The sound of waves gently crashing against the shore provided a soothing backdrop to the party, blending harmoniously with the laughter and chatter of the attendees.

A keg, the star of the show, stood prominently near the bonfire, with a line of people waiting to fill their red Solo cups. Surfboards and beach gear were propped up in the sand, and a few adventurous souls took turns riding the waves illuminated by the moonlight. Others played beach volleyball or tossed a frisbee, their silhouettes barely visible in the dim light. The camaraderie was palpable, with everyone enjoying the carefree spirit of the night.

Except for you, of course. How in the hell did Maisy convince you to go to a kegger alone, you didn't know either. Unsolved mystery.

JJ stood a few feet away, with John B and Pope, drinking beers and chatting. His attention was half-focused on their conversation, but his eyes kept flicking towards you, standing awkwardly off to the side of the party. He couldn't help but notice how out of place you looked, your pretty dress standing out among the casual outfits of the Pogues and Kooks alike. If you could even call them that. Most of them were either topless of in bikinis.

His eyes lingered on you for a moment, taking in your nervous fiddling with the hem of your dress, the way you seemed uncomfortable and out of place in the crowded party environment.

But he made no efort to walk up to you too scared and unsure, and you didn't notice him, despite, secretly looking for him. You took small hesitant steps forward, further onto the beach and away from the spot you were in a few moments ago. You hated crowds and cheap beer, so why were you at a kegger? alone too? Cause you were dumb that's why.

You weaved through the crowds and tried not to bump into people as you made you way around the beach mindlessly, no purpose in mind, just trying not to have a panic attack hopefully. Stopping next to a cooler you pried it open, kneeling down next to it to grab a can of... something. You weren't sure what you were drinking here, seltzer maybe? But oh, well. Alcohol is liquid courage.. or confidence, you didn't remember how the saying went. You needed both of those, anyway.

As you knelt down next to the cooler, the fabric of your dress hugging your figure in a way that accentuated your curves, JJ's eyes couldn't help but be drawn to you. He felt a jolt of... something. Attraction, definitely, but also a hint of something else, something inexplicable inside him, a feeling he couldn't quite place. For a moment, he just stared, his mind going blank.

Finally, he snapped out of it, suddenly aware that John B and Pope had stopped their conversation and were now staring at him with curious smirks.

Pope cleared his throat, nudging JJ with an elbow, a hint of mischief in his eyes. "Yo, JJ... seeing something you like there?"

John B chuckled, also noticing where JJ's gaze had been fixed. "Looks like our resident flirt has found his next target."

JJ tried to play it cool, rolling his eyes at his friends. He didn't want to admit to them that, yes, he was indeed "seeing something he liked" and that he couldn't tear his gaze away from that "something"

He grumbled, trying to sound nonchalant. "Oh, shut it, man. Just... just checking out the crowd, y'know. That's all."

John B exchanged a knowing look with Pope, before both of them broke out into grins.

"Yeah, sure. Checking out the crowd, my ass. You were eye-fucking her. We're not blind, JJ." Pope chimed in, amused by JJ's denial.

John B added with a smirk, "And who can blame you? She looks good tonight. Like, really good."

JJ felt his cheeks heat up at his friends' teasing. They were right, he was definitely checking you out, ogling at you in that damn dress that kinda looked like a night gown now that he thought about it. He couldn't help it. You looked so different from your usual self, the soft, pretty dress a stark contrast to your usual jeans and oversized hoodies that you wore for skating, your hair usually tied up in a ponytail, now loose and falling past your shoulders in beautiful curls. He swallowed, trying to find an excuse, something to hide how he was really feeling.

"I... it's just... you know who that is, right?"

The guys both nodded, sharing another amused smirk between themselves. John B chimed up first, chuckling. JJ was trying to act nonchalant, but both of them could see how flustered he was. They rarely saw JJ flustered like this, especially over a girl. "That the chick you got stuck in the closet in? The 'mouse' one? You trying to make a move on her or what?"

JJ groaned in frustration, feeling cornered at the annoying barrage of questions and knowing looks from his best friends. He didn't want to admit to them, or even himself, how attracted he was to you that night. He couldn't explain it. Sure, you'd always been cute, in a nerdy, quiet way. But seeing you all dolled up, dressed up in that pretty dress for the first time ever... it was doing things to him. Things that he was trying to desperately ignore since you helped him out that night.

He took a deep breath, trying to regain his usual aloof attitude. "I... I don't know, man. It's not that simple."

Unbeknownst to the conversation that was unfolding about you a few good feet away, you stood up straight, studying the can of alcohol you picked up from the cooler, snapping the lid shut with your foot as you looked at the label. Vodka seltzer it seemed, you shrugged cracking the can open and taking a hesitant first sip. Tastes fine. Fruity and stingy, as all alcohol was but not unpleasant, and definitely not beer. It will have to do, you thought.

JJ watched as you popped open the can and took a sip. He couldn't help but feel a pang of... Concern? Yes, that's what it was. Concern. He knew you rarely drank, and here you were, at a kegger alone with a can of alcohol.

Without thinking twice, he excused himself from his friends, who were still teasing him about you, and pushed through the small crowd of drunk teenagers towards you.

As he approached you, he noticed that you were looking a little overwhelmed, standing alone with the can in your hand, taking small, hesitant sips. He felt a wave of protectiveness wash over him. Despite the rivalry between Pogues and Kooks, he couldn't help but feel the need to make sure you were alright. Not as a pogue talking to a kook but as an acquaintance checking up on a girl alone at a party.

He stopped beside you, giving you a small, casual smile.

"Hey, mouse. You holding up okay?"

When you showed up to the kegger, alone and inevitably too dressed up for the thing you didn't know exactly what you had in mind. Getting black out drunk? Addressing the whole picture in the wallet and sleeping over at your place situation with JJ? You didn't know. The crowd overwhelmed you, and you were slightly uncomfortable from the makeup and the dress.

You turned around at the sound of his voice, your demeanor becoming even more meeker. Great. He actually came up to you. "hi.." you greeted quietly, maybe too quiet given the blaring music around you and the sounds from the teenage crowd floating around both of you. "Yeah 'm holding up.."

JJ leaned closer to you, the loud music in the background making it difficult to hear each other. He could see the unease in your demeanor, the way you fidgeted, the quiet, nervous look in your eyes. It made him feel strangely protective, a feeling he wasn't used to.

He gestured at your drink, attempting a lighthearted tone. "What're you drinking there, mouse? Never pegged you as an alcoholic."

"I'm not sure.." you mumbled, looking down at the can and adjusting your glasses.

JJ chuckled, a hint of amusement in his voice.

"You're not sure? That's dangerous, mouse. You don't know what you're putting in that pretty mouth of yours." The words were out before he could stop them, a little suggestive. He couldn't help it. Especially with the beer he had and the weed he smoked before coming up to you.

'Okay? that was a little suggestive', you thought. You looked down, shifting awkwardly on the sand trying to think of something to say without sounding too flustered or awkward, "it tastes fine.."

JJ watched as you shifted awkwardly, taking another sip from your mystery drink. He smirked, seeing how flustered you were at his little comment.

He took a step closer, his eyes roaming over your face, pausing on your lips, then your eyes, before returning to your lips again. "Yeah? Well, let me taste it."

Before you had the chance to process his words, JJ had already closed the distance between you, taking the can out of your hand and bringing it to his lips, taking a sip. He watched as your eyes widened in surprise, a mixture of shock and shyness.

He handed the can back to you, a cocky smirk on his face. "Mmm... you're right, it does taste fine. What is it, peach seltzer?"

"That's my lip-gloss.." you stated awkwardly, knowing that aside from your drink he had probably tasted your lip gloss stuck on the rim of the can when you took some sips of your own.

JJ's eyebrows raised in surprise, and he let out a soft chuckle at your words. "Your lip-gloss, huh?"

He looked down at your lips, now slightly shiny from the gloss, his gaze lingering. He couldn't help but imagine how it would feel to kiss you right now, tasting the sweet, fruity flavor of the lip gloss on your lips, or the actual drink on your tongue. He cleared his throat. "Well, it tastes better than the drink."

"You should've cleaned the rim.." you suggested awkwardly once again, shifting on your heels, your sneakers digging into the soft sand beneath them.

JJ couldn't help but chuckle again at your comment. You were always so damn cute when you were uncomfortable. He stepped closer, now standing only a few inches away from you. He couldn't resist teasing you a little. "Yeah, guess I should've. But it's a bit late now, isn't it? Guess you'll just have to forgive me."

You looked up at him, shrugging slightly, "it's okay.." you spoke, taking a small step back at the close proximity, despite having slept in the same bed almost a week ago.

He noticed your slight step back, the hint of awkwardness between you both despite the close proximity. He couldn't help but wonder what you were thinking about that night when you had let him stay over at your place.

He smirked, deciding to bring it up, half-joking. "You know, I still haven't thanked you properly for letting me stay over that night."

"You had... you thanked me like 5 times... i think." you answered meekly, "how's your rib?" you pointed vaguely to his side.

He chuckled, amused by your memory of the event. "Mmm, you're right, I did. But maybe I'm due for another 'thank you' tonight."

He lifted his shirt slightly, revealing the now bruised rib (and a sneak peak of his toned abs in the process), the colors of the bruise faded into a pale green. It was almost healed, just a little stiff.

"It's a lot better. Still sore as hell, though."

You nodded knowingly, your eyes studying the fading bruise from behind your glasses, trying not to let your eyes drift to his abs. "Well, I'm glad it wasn't broken.."

He watched as you studied the bruise, your eyes hidden behind the glasses. Despite the casual situation, he felt a strange sense of vulnerability under your gaze. There was something intimate about it, but he quickly brushed it aside. He shrugged, nonchalant as always. "Mhm, me too. I'd have been in for a world of pain if it were. So, don't worry. I'm good as new."

As the silence between you continued, JJ found himself studying your face, the way your glasses framed your eyes, the hint of redness on your cheeks, or the subtle makeup enhancing your soft and pretty features. He suddenly felt the urge to reach out and touch your hair, to see if it was as silky as it looked. But he held back, not wanting to make things even more awkward than they already were.

Instead, he broke the silence, changing the subject. "You know, I still can't believe you're wearing a dress."

You glanced down at the velvety sage green dress flowing gently into the breeze from the ocean, your faded converse dimming down the look of it. You wore dresses, sometimes. When you weren't skating, of course. But this one tonight was Maisy's idea. In your opinion the small pink flowers made it look like a sleeping gown. "it's a bit uncomfortable if I'm being honest.."

JJ raised an eyebrow, taking a moment to appreciate the way the dress hugged your curves and how the soft material swayed with each gentle breeze. You looked absolutely sinful, and he was definitely staring. But in a respectful, neutral kind of way.

"Yeah, it looks a little like a nightdress. Cute, but not really kegger-appropriate." He smirked, a hint of amusement in his eyes.

He took a step closer, the gap between you closing even more. He reached out, gently tugging on the hem of the dress, his fingers grazing your hip.

His voice was low and teasing. "Why'd you dress up so nice for this kegger anyway? Trying to impress someone, mouse?"

"I'm not dressed nicely... it's a summer dress.." you spoke quietly, glancing down at his hand with a subtle questioning look and then back up at his face.

JJ smirked at your quiet response, amused by your denial of the obvious. He tugged on the hem of the dress once more, his fingers still lingering on your hip, the subtle touch sending a shiver down your spine. "Bullshit, mouse. You're practically glowing. You look gorgeous in this. You definitely stand out among the drunk teenagers on this beach."

He tilted his head slightly, locking eyes with you. "So I'm gonna ask you again, why the hell are you wearing a gorgeous, pretty dress at a kegger, hmm?"

His fingers traced a small circle on your hip, the contact causing your heart to race.

"No reason." you shrugged, trying to ignore the fact that he was actually touching you, and questioning you so intensely. What the actual fuck?

JJ raised an eyebrow at your nonchalant response, his fingers still tracing small circles on your hip, his touch light yet electrifying.

He leaned in a little closer, his voice lowering to a huskier tone. "Bullshit again. You don't dress up like this for no reason, mouse. You don't come to a kegger all dolled up for no reason."

"Why do i gotta have a reason?" you asked gently, narrowing your eyes in mild and shy curiosity.

JJ chuckled softly at your question, the innocent curiosity in your eyes endearing to him.

"Because people usually have reasons for doing things, mouse. You don't just dress up and go to a party that's usually full of stoners and drunk people in board shorts and bikinis for fun."

He took another step closer, his chest now almost touching yours. He smirked, his eyes roaming over your body again.

You could tell he was drunk and high, that much was obvious. Maybe that's why he was prying and being so touchy—and the dress was a step up from your usual clothing. Men were really simple creatures it seemed. "I just wanted a small change... besides.. it's a nice summer dress. Perfect for a kegger on the beach.... in the midst of summer." you spoke quietly, your fingers reaching up to adjust your glasses.

JJ chuckled again at your response, appreciating your quiet honesty. He knew damn well that you were still avoiding the truth, but he didn't push it. Not yet, anyway.

He leaned in even closer, his breath hot against your ear. "It is a nice summer dress, I'll give you that... but I think it would look even better on my floor tonight."

Before you could stammer out a flustered response to his obvious and shameless flirting, you were interrupted by a small cough. Your head snapped to the side at the sound, eyes falling onto the source of the voice.

You knew Ben from Maisy. He was one of the few acquaintances you actually didn't mind. You turned to face the boy, giving him a small, polite smile and adjusting your glasses. "Hi, Ben..." you greeted hesitantly, a touch of confusion coloring your tone. It was unusual for him to approach you, especially when Maisy wasn't with you.

JJ groaned internally at the interruption, annoyed that his moment of closeness with you had been cut off by some random guy approaching you. He was waiting for your reply intently. He recognized Ben as one of Maisy's friends and instantly disliked him on principle. He took a step back, his face hardening as he crossed his arms over his chest, watching you interact with the other boy closely.

Ben, on the other hand, was giving JJ a friendly smile, totally oblivious to the underlying tension between the two of you. He was a typical Kook, charming, athletic, sociable, and completely unaware of the world outside his little rich bubble.

He returned your smile, giving you a nod in greeting. "Hey Y/n, I thought that was you! You look great tonight."

"Aw thanks..." you shifted awkwardly at his compliment. You knew Ben from the countless band practices you went to with Maisy when she was hooking up with their guitarist. Ben was on the drums and pretty nice too. Never 'come up to you at a kegger and compliment you' nice, though. Weird.

Ben chuckled, clearly enjoying the shy, flustered look on your face. JJ scowled, silently hating the way this guy was making you blush.

Ben glanced at JJ over your shoulder, noticing the pogue's stern expression. He gave JJ a small nod, acknowledging his presence before returning his attention to you. "You here on your own?"

"Yeah.. um.. Maisy's out of town unfortunately." you stammered nodding.

Ben nodded understandingly, a hint of disappointment on his face. "Ah, that's a shame. I've been meaning to hang out with her more. She's been so busy lately.."

JJ rolled his eyes, wishing these two dorks would hurry up with the small talk so he could have you to himself again.

"Well... it would be awkward since her and Riley broke up. But hey, you can convince him to have us over at another band practice.." you chuckled awkwardly, shaking your head.

Ben let out a laugh, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "Yeah, it has been kind of weird between them... but I guess that's just how it is when you date a bandmate and it doesn't work out."

JJ was starting to lose patience. He was tired of watching you and Ben chat about irrelevant band drama. He decided to intervene, taking a step forward and placing a possessive hand on your hip.

"Hey Ben, sorry to cut this chat short, but I need to talk to mouse alone for a sec." He looked at Ben coldly, almost daring him to object.

Ben looked surprised, clearly not expecting JJ to interject like that. He looked between you and JJ, his friendly expression faltering a bit at JJ's possessive hand on your hip and the way he called you "mouse". "Oh, uh... sure, man. I don't mind."

JJ smirked, satisfied that Ben had taken the hint and backed off. He pulled you a few steps away from Ben, his hand still firmly on your hip.

He leaned down, his lips brushing against your ear as he spoke, glancing over his shoulder at the retreating form of Ben. "That guy's a total dork, mouse."

"Ben's my friend." you mumbled in confusion side glancing up at him in quiet confusion. "Well, sort of.."

JJ chuckled, the alcohol and weed making his irritation and possessive streak even stronger than usual. "Yeah, yeah... I get that. He's one of Maisy's friends. But he's still a total dork. Do you think he's cute?"

"I dunno... -why does it matter?" you asked, your brows furrowing gently.

JJ shrugged, his grip on your hip tightening slightly. "No reason. I'm just asking." He leaned in closer, his lips practically touching your ear as he spoke again in a low, almost possessive tone.

"You wanna know what I think?"

He didn't wait for you to reply, continuing on "I think that he was all over you tonight. The whole 'you look gorgeous' comment, the 'i've been meaning to hang out with Maisy' line.... what a load of bullshit."

"No he wasn't.. Ben's always nice." You mumbled, grimacing slightly. What was in the air tonight, and why is JJ acting like... whatever he's acting like right now.

JJ rolled his eyes at your naiveté. "Mouse, if you think that dork was just being nice, then you're even more clueless than I thought." He pulled you closer, his hand now on your lower back, almost hugging you against him

He continued speaking, his voice low and rough, his head tilted down close to yours. "He was hitting on you, mouse. That whole 'you look great tonight' and 'I've been wanting to hang out with Maisy more' crap was just an excuse to make himself look good."

"But... why are you so worked up?" you voiced your curiosity without meaning to. You just kept switching between different levels of disbelief, each one more intense than the other. Especially since he was being so touchy-feely.

JJ felt his irritation and possessiveness flare up even more at your question. Why was he so worked up, you ask? "Because I don't like seeing some dickhead kooked up dork drooling over you. It pisses me off."

He tightened his grip on your waist, his fingers digging into your skin as he pulled you even closer, a bit over the boundary he respected usually.

He leaned in even closer, his lips hovering over your neck, his breath hot against your skin as he spoke. "You're supposed to be hanging out with me tonight, mouse. Not some lame ass Kook with a dumbass haircut and a drum set."

Your brows furrowed, growing more shocked at his actions. What the fuck was happening, like actually? "ah.. okay?" you mustered out. You weren't sure what to do with your hands or how to feel given he was practically clinging to you in the middle of the beach.

JJ smirked at your flustered, shocked reaction. He was enjoying the way he was making you squirm in his hands. He pressed himself against you even more, his chest now fully pressed against yours, his chin resting on your shoulder. He inhaled the scent of your hair, all too familiar with the smell of your shampoo since that night, his fingers tracing small circles on your lower back just above your hips.

He spoke in a low, huskier tone, his lips grazing your ear.

"You smell good, mouse. You look good too. In this goddamn pretty dress and those stupid high tops you always wear... you look so damn pretty tonight."

"What's happening?" you asked, your hands resting on his shoulders hesitantly.

JJ chuckled, amused by your bewildered expression. He liked that he could fluster you so easily. He liked having you close like this, in his arms, all dressed up in a pretty little summer dress.

He pulled you even closer, his hands now fully on your hips, his fingers digging into your skin. "What do you mean 'what's happening'? I'm touching you, mouse. You know... cause I want to."

He leaned down, his lips brushing against your neck. He didn't kiss your neck, though he wanted to, just teased you a bit, enjoying the way your hands clenched around his shoulders in response to his touch. "You like this, don't you? Being close to me... being touched, pretty little mouse?"

"I'm just a little confused that's all..?" you spoke, trying to keep your voice steady, even though you were freaking out inside, close to an asthma attack.

JJ chuckled again, his hands still on your hips, his fingers slowly tracing small circles on your skin through the fabric of the dress.

"What's so confusing, sweet mouse?" He nipped at your earlobe teasingly, then licked a spot on your neck just below it.

He smirked against your skin as he spoke again, his voice rough and full of desire. "You taste good, mouse. You think I should taste you somewhere else, just to see if you taste as good there too? Just to make sure."

Okay something definitely was in the the air tonight. Cause what? did he actually just ask you that? You blinked a couple of times in confusion and flusteredness, your brows furrowing, "what exactly are we talking about?" you asked meekly.

JJ chuckled huskily, loving how you kept letting him fluster you. He leaned back a bit so he could look into your face, his eyes roaming over your flushed cheeks and wide eyes.

He raised an eyebrow, his voice dropping an octave as one of his hands slowly travelled down to the hem of your dress, grazing over the bare skin of your thigh, and making the fabric ride up on your leg just a little bit.

His hand on your hip stayed in place, his fingers tracing lazy patterns on your skin, while the one on your thighs traced higher, slowly pushing up the hem of your dress, causing it to expose more and more of your skin to him as it went.

He leaned in close to your ear, his lips just barely touching your skin as he spoke, his words laced with a hint of desire. "You want me to show you what I mean, pretty little mouse?"

"I think i know.." you mumbled breathlessly, a small nervous smile tugging at your lips as his hand slid under the fabric of your slip dress. This genuinely felt unreal. The same guy who didn't bother sparing a glance in your direction before you got stuck in a closet like a month ago, was... well groping you shamelessly? in the middle of a kegger nonetheless. Same guy who you've been in love with since you were 9. Crazy. Your brain and breathing had trouble keeping up.

JJ chuckled, loving the breathless sound of your voice as he teased his hand farther up your thigh, his fingers tracing the edge of your underwear. He loved the way you looked right now, wearing that cute little dress and your favorite sneakers, with a flushed, flustered expression on your face.

He nibbled on your earlobe again, his breath hot against your skin as he spoke. "Oh yeah? You gonna tell me what you think then, pretty girl?"

His hands continued to roam over your body, one on your hip, the other under your dress. He shifted, pressing his body against yours even more, his chest flush against yours. His breath was now coming in warm, ragged pants, his eyes darkened with desire as he leaned down and started leaving a trail of soft kisses along your neck and shoulder.

"All i know is that.. well... we're still on the beach? I dunno what's happening but.. seems like something that shouldn't be for the public." Yeah no shit dumbass. Whatever he's suggesting is, in fact not public worthy. This is still shocking. His hand was actually under your dress, his face buried in your neck. While you stood there like a scarecrow, unmoving.

JJ chuckled, his breath tickling your neck. He looked up and around at the people dancing and partying around them, realizing you were right. "Yeah... guess you're right about that one, mouse. Wouldn't want anyone to get a show they didn't ask for, huh?"

He smirked, pulling away from your neck, his hand slipping out from under your dress with some reluctance.

He took a step back, putting some space between you. He looked down at you, his eyes roaming over your flushed face and outfit. You looked so damn pretty, and it was driving him nuts. "C'mon, sweet mouse. Let's go somewhere a little more private."

At that point who were you to protest. The guy you've been in love with secretly was basically dragging you away to well... fuck? And that was more than enough instead of some sort of awkward conversation. And it wasn't like you didn't want to. Or thought about it before. You'd be a liar if you said you didn't.

The walk to the chateau from the beach was hurried and frankly too quiet for your liking. Surprisingly. But given you were a bit tipsy, you didn't mind escaping the crowd to be alone with JJ. Especially he seemed more than eager. He was the reason you came to the thing in the first place anyway.

JJ pulled you through the throngs of drunk teenagers and away from the beach, his hand still gripping yours as he navigated the dark streets. He led you towards the Chateau, knowing they could get some privacy there. He wasn’t sure what was going on at this point, but he was too intoxicated and aroused to question it too much. Initially JJ was gonna stay a good distance from you when he first noticed you at the kegger. Wave and shoot you a friendly smile, careful not to push the boundary too much like he did a week ago. But who was he trying to fool here, he was still carrying that picture of you and he found himself checking it when he had the time to throughout the days.

When they reached the house, he led you inside, pulling you into a dark room and closing the door behind them.

He pushed you lightly against the wall, his hands on your hips, trapping you between him and the wall. He looked into your face, his eyes roaming over your flushed face, your messy hair, your pretty little dress.

He spoke in a gruff, huskier voice, his eyes dark with desire. "This better, mouse? You like being alone with me like this?"

He leaned down, his lips brushing against your neck again as he spoke, his hands slowly moving up your sides, slipping under your dress. "You look so pretty in this dress. Such a pretty little thing... all dressed up for me, huh?"

You found your self humming and nodding without realizing, basically melting in his hands as he continued to compliment and touch you shamelessly, completely in disbelief at the situation.

JJ smirked against your skin, loving the way you were practically melting in his hands, responding to his touch so eagerly. He continued to whisper praises against your neck, his lips nipping at the sensitive skin there, his hands roaming under your dress, slowly sliding up your thigh.

"You like being alone with me like this, don't you, sweet mouse? All alone, in a dark room, with me touching you like this?"

He continued to kiss and nip at your neck, his lips and tongue leaving a trail of wet kisses along your skin, moving down towards your collarbone. He pushed the strap of your dress off your shoulder easily, giving himself more access to your skin.

His hands continued to move along your thighs, pushing up the hem of your dress as they went. "You feel so damn good, mouse. So soft and pretty and warm..."

Your hands reached up instinctively, raking through the hair at his nape gently, small quiet sighs escaping your parted lips as you writhed against the wall next to the door. He sounded heavenly, complimenting you and touching you like he couldn't get enough of it.

JJ let out a soft moan as your fingers raked through his hair, the sensation sending shivers down his spine. He pressed himself closer to you, his body pinning you against the wall, trapping you there as he continued to shower your neck and collarbone with kisses and bites. JJ found himself more and more satisfied as writhed and sighed softly, reveling in the way you sounded in the quiet room.

He moved one of his knee between your legs, causing your dress to ride up even more, exposing your inner thigh to him.

He nipped at a sensitive spot on your neck, his teeth gently scraping against the skin, before he spoke in a low, huskier voice, his words coming out as a gruff whisper against your skin.

"You like this, mouse? Like having me pinning you against the wall like this? Having me touching you like this, running my hands all over your skin, just how I've been thinking about?"

Your breathing was ragged your hands still tugging at his hair gently, taking a few moments to catch your breath before speaking, "i.. genuinely didn't expect this to happen." you chuckled breathlessly.

JJ let out another soft moan, loving the way you tugged at his hair. He continued to kiss and bite your neck and collarbone, marking your skin with hickies and pink bite marks as he spoke, his voice gruff and full of desire. "Me neither, mouse. But I'm sure as hell enjoying it though..."

He slid his hands up higher, pulling up your dress, exposing even more of your bare skin to him. He trailed kisses along your bare shoulder, then started to lick and bite his way back up to your neck, his tongue and teeth leaving a trail of bite marks along your skin.

He pushed his knee up against you, pressing his thigh between your legs, letting you feel how hard he was for you already. Which shocked him too, you didn't even kiss him directly and he already was worked up.

At the small pressure between your legs you let out a small almost imperceptible moan, writhing against him and the wall. You didn't know what was more shocking, the fact that he was hard and pressed against you, or the fact that you were doing this in the first place.

JJ felt a small smirk tug at the corners of his lips as he heard the tiny moan that escaped your mouth. He loved the sounds you were making. He loved hearing you talk, and laugh softly at times when he made a dumb joke while making small talk with you out and about.

But JJ realized that he loved the way you were pressed against him, writhing and pushing against his knee as he pinned you to the wall, causing sweet shy moans to escape your lips more than anything.

He nipped at your ear lobe, then whispered gruffly into your ear, his words full of desire and need. "Hear that, mouse? You like having me rubbing against you like this, don't you? You like feeling how hard I am for you?"

He continued to whisper into your ear, his voice rough and full of need and desire as he spoke, his hands grasping at the soft flesh of your hips and thighs, pulling you closer to him.

"Can you feel how hard you're making me, mouse? How much I want you, pretty little mouse?"

You nodded, although he probably couldn't see it, another small strained sound leaving your lips. One of your hands reached up to adjust your glasses, your body feeling like it was on fire, both from his words and actions. The thought that, this was nothing out of the ordinary for him while you were experiencing these things for the first time tugged at your brain, but you were too aroused to care. You might try and talk to him about it after. If you could. For now your hands moved to cup his face gently, cradling his jaw as his thigh continued to press between your legs, causing small jolts of pleasure shoot through your body.

JJ felt his breath catch in his throat as you gently cupped his face, your thumb brushing against his cheek. It was a strangely tender gesture, and it sent a pang of something unreadable through him. Something that had nothing to do with the hard-on pressing insistently on your inner thigh.

He looked into your face, his eyes locking onto yours. Your eyes were wide and full of need and desire, your face flushed and hair messy. He loved the way you looked right now, all flustered and excited because of him.

He leaned his head down, resting his forehead against yours as he spoke in a gruff, husky voice.

"You drive me crazy, pretty little mouse. You know that, don't you? You drive me crazy with those big eyes of yours starin' at me through your glasses, and that innocent, sweet little mouth of yours."

He nipped at your bottom lip, his teeth raking against it before he pulled back to speak again, his voice huskier than before. "How you feel against me like this... it's like you were made for me."

He leaned down again, his lips brushing against your skin, planting soft, gentle kisses along your jaw and neck, continuing to whisper gruffly into your ear. "You're so damn sweet, mouse. So soft and pretty. Makes me want to keep you all to myself."

His hands continued to roam, his fingers tracing your thighs and hips, pulling you closer to him as his thigh pressed between your legs, continuing to cause those jolts of pleasure to shoot through your body. "Maybe i just might.." he added quietly, more to himself than for you.

At the moment you wanted to speak, say some things of yourself but you couldn't. It was like when you got all shy and clammed up flustered, only 10 times worse, or better. He looked even prettier than usual, his hair messy and his face buried into the crook of your neck, the kisses he pressed there gently making you even more aroused. Who would've thought you liked neck kisses? The way his hands were roaming under your soft thin dress was shameless, groping and bunching up the fabric was driving you mad, making you dizzy and like you were in a dream. Maisy would die when hearing about this.

JJ continued to kiss and bite at your neck and collarbone, his teeth and lips nipping at the sensitive skin there. He loved the sounds you were making, the small gasps and moans you couldn't hold back as he touched you, his hands roaming across your thighs and hips. He felt like he could worship your body like this forever, just touching you and kissing you and marking you as his.

He pulled back for a moment, his eyes roaming over your flushed face and messy hair, his voice gruff and full of need.

"You have any idea how pretty you are, mouse? How pretty you look right now, all flushed and messed up like this? It's like you were made for me, all soft and warm and mine..."

He leaned down, his mouth attacking the other side of your neck again, his lips and tongue leaving more kisses and bite marks along your plush skin, his hands continuing to touch and grope at your thighs and body without any actual care for any boundary that might have existed previously. He had enough of those.

Your hands switched between cradling his face and running through his hair, the softness of it making your head even fuzzier. He smelled like cologne and weed mixed with sunscreen and your brain didn't know what to focus on. The feeling of his thigh between your slightly shaky legs? his lips all over your neck and collarbone or the way his hands roamed all over your skin under your dress? You were overwhelmed, in a good way, soft moans escaping your lips without meaning to, slightly shocked that you could make such sounds.

JJ felt his heart thudding in his chest as he heard the soft moans you were making, the sounds making him harder than he ever thought possible. He loved the feel of your fingers in his hair, the way your hands clung to him like you never wanted him to stop touching you.

He pulled back slightly, his lips and teeth leaving your neck with a quiet gasp, his breath ragged as he spoke in a gruff, huskier voice. "God, you sound so damn good, mouse..."

He pulled your hips closer to him, his hands grasping at your body, bunching up the fabric of your dress as he pressed his hard body against you. He could feel you against him, soft and warm and needy, and it was driving him insane. He leaned down, his lips ghosting over your ear as he spoke in a low whisper. "You feel that, pretty mouse? You feel how hard you're making me? I want you so damn bad, I can hardly stand it."

One of your hands trailed down his chest, your touch small and almost shy despite the situation you were in, your fingers brushing against his belt and the skin above it, under his shirt, your eyes darting across his face in the low light of the room.

JJ felt a jolt go through his body as your small, warm hand touched his bare skin, your fingers trailing down his chest and towards his belt. He let out a soft hiss through his teeth, his body reacting to your touch like it was electric.

He couldn't believe how soft and gentle you were being, given the circumstances. It was a sharp contrast to his own rough, demanding touch, and it made his heart thump in his chest. "Careful, mouse," he breathed, his voice huskier than before.

He looked down at you, his eyes dark and full of desire, his hands still clutching at your hips, holding you tight against him. He could feel the heat radiating off your body, the soft, small press of your hip against his, and it was almost too much for him to bear.

"You keep touching me like that, and I'm going to start thinking that you want me," he said, his voice ragged and full of need.

You let out a small breathless chuckle at his words, your hand stilling its movements, your brows furrowed in amusement that was probably overshadowed by your arousal and flusteredness. As if that wasn't obvious.

JJ's eyes darkened even further as he heard your breathless chuckle, his body tensing as he looked down at you, his gaze intense and hungry. He loved the sound of your laugh, even in this situation, and he wanted to hear it again and again and again. Like a song he likes to overplay.

He pulled you even closer to him, his body pressed firmly against yours, his hands still grasping at your hips.

"You think this is funny, mouse? You think it's funny how much I want you right now? How much I need you?"

You shook your head, a small grin tugging at your lips as your eyes stayed locked on his. You were chuckling nervously if anything, your arms wrapping around his neck loosely and gingerly as he pulled you closer, his face inching closer as he pressed you against the wall and between him self.

JJ couldn't take his eyes off yours, your small grin and the way you gingerly wrapped your arms around his neck sending a thrill through his body. He could feel your breath against his skin, the small, shy way you moved, the way you were letting him hold you like this, holding you against the wall like he couldn't bear to let you go.

He leaned in closer, his face inches away from yours, voicing out his curiosity which was mixed with an overwhelming amount of lust.

"Where were you this whole time?"

He was so close to you now, his body pressed flush against yours, his lips mere inches away from your own. He could smell the scent of your skin, a mix of sweetness and musk that was driving him wild. His hands slowly slid down the side of your body, tracing the curves of your waist and hips, his fingers gently caressing the soft fabric of your dress.

"You know what I want, mouse...?" he whispered, his voice husky and full of need. "What I need from you?"

You shook your head, your eyes locking into his as he leaned even close, your breaths mingling and his lips ghosting over yours as he spoke. You were tempted to close the distance for a moment. Before realizing that you didn't even know how to kiss.

JJ's breath hitched as he saw your eyes lock onto his, your breaths mingling with his, so close together that he could feel the heat radiating off your body, and hear the unevenness of your breathing.

He couldn't think straight anymore, his mind full of only one thing, one person, you. He could feel the desire growing within him, the need to be even closer to you, to touch and caress and taste you. Anything you'd let him do.

"Say please," he whispered, his voice a rugged husk against your skin. "I want you to say please to me.."

"Please?" you questioned meekly, finally speaking up after god knows how long of just gasping and moaning softly, your voice wavered and shaky.

JJ let out a small groan as he heard your soft, meek voice say "please," the word ringing in his ears. It was the first time he'd heard you speak in what felt like hours, and he loved the sound of it, your voice soft and wavering.

He could feel his body react to you, the need within him growing even more intense, his heart pounding in his chest. He leaned in even closer, his breath ghosting over your lips as he spoke again, his demand hurried and strained.

"Say it again."

"Please.." you pleaded quietly, questioning tone leaving your shaky voice. You weren't sure what for, your brain too focused on how close his lips were to yours.

JJ felt a jolt of desire run through him as you said "please" again, your soft, shaky voice making him even more desperate for you. He loved the way your body felt pressed against him, the heat between you, the way your voices sounded so close together, how you both sounded out of breath.

"Good girl," he murmured, his breath ghosting over your lips, so close he could kiss you, but he held himself back, wanting to hear you say it one more time.

"Again."

"Are you gonna kiss me?" you wondered out loud, your brows raised. Your body thrummed at the small praise and it was like something in you was unearthed. Praise was something your fuzzy brain liked apparently because you could feel your self grow more aroused. It was a shocking revelation.

JJ felt his heart thump in his chest as he heard your question, your brow raised and a hint of need in your tone.

He could see a new spark in your eyes, as if something had been awakened inside of you, like you were craving his touch, his attention, his praise. And he was more than happy to praise you if it meant he got to do this with you.

"Is that what you want, pretty little mouse? For me to kiss you?" he breathed, his lips hovering millimeters away from yours, taunting you with the closeness.

"I don't know how.." you whispered, your voice wavering gently, your arms still wrapped around his neck for support. You played with the hair at the back of his neck, more out of nervousness than trying to be touchy feely.

JJ felt a wave of tenderness go through him as he heard your soft, wavering voice, his heart swelling in his chest. He hadn't expected you to say that, to admit that you didn't know how to kiss.

His desire for you was still strong, burning in his chest like a flame, but he also felt a sudden urge to be gentle, to go slow and show you how.

"It's okay, mouse. You don't need to know anything," he murmured, his hand brushing against the side of your face.

"Just let me take care of you," he continued, his voice a soft, gruff whisper as he drew even closer, his body pressed against yours, his lips now so close that you could feel his breath against yours.

"It's okay, pretty mouse. Just close your eyes, and let me show you how it's done."

"Don't you find it weird?" you asked meekly even though you knew you were supposed to be silent and not ask irrelevant questions anymore, furrowing your brows and shifting your face gently.

JJ shook his head, his eyes never leaving yours as he spoke softly, his hand still resting against the side of your face, his thumb tracing a gentle path across your skin.

"No, mouse. I don't find it weird. I find it...endearing, actually. The idea that I'll be your first kiss...I've never really thought about a girl not kissing anyone before..."

"But I can't say I'm complaining. I like the idea of being the one to teach you what it's like."

His fingers traced a soft path down your jawline, his touch gentle and unhurried. "Just close your eyes for me, pretty mouse. Trust me, you'll love it."

You let your eyes flutter closed despite how nervous you were. I mean who would've thought that you would actually end up having your first kiss with the boy you liked since, forever basically. Maybe you were a little lucky after all. You tilted your head to the right side, parting your lips in anticipation.

As your eyes fluttered closed, JJ felt a rush of tenderness go through him, almost overwhelmed by how beautiful and innocent you looked in that moment.

He gently brought his thumb to your chin, tilting your head back slightly, his eyes tracing over your face in the low light, taking in every detail.

"Relax, pretty girl," he murmured, his voice impossibly soft, his breath warm against your cheeks. "I've got you."

Then he leaned down, his lips gently pressing against yours.

JJ's heart raced in his chest as he finally kissed you after thinking about it all night and these past weeks. His mouth moved gently against yours, hesitant and tender. He was careful, slow, almost a little unsure, but he wanted you to feel as comfortable as possible, and he knew that your inexperience made this moment all the more special.

He didn't quite know what he had been expecting, but feeling your soft, sweet lips against his was something he hadn't been prepared for, especially since he could taste the peach lip-gloss faintly just like he'd wanted. It was a completely different experience, and he found himself enjoying it more than he ever thought himself capable of.

One of your hands slid to cup the side of his face gently as he kissed you, the feeling so unlike anything you felt but not unpleasant. It was soft and hesitant, a stark contrast from how he was kissing your neck just a few moments ago, and you found your self kissing him back surprisingly with little to no hesitation. Obviously. You'd imagined this countless times before. When watching him in the school halls, laughing with his friends loudly. Or when he'd finish surfing, coming out of the water all sun-kissed and whooping happily.

But none of those day dreams compared to the real thing. To the way you felt while experiencing it and the way he was reacting to the kiss. You didn't take those details in account when daydreaming. You weren't prepared by how gentle he was being or how soft his lips were against your own, his hand sliding down to tangle in the hair on the back of your head, just resting there.

As you responded to his kiss, cupping the side of his face with your small, gentle hand, JJ felt a wave of heat and affection wash over him, surprised and pleased by your willingness to respond. He was used to rough, roughhousing and quick, heated moments with girls he didn't care about, but this was so different, so new and special and tender.

He let out a soft sound against your lips as you kissed him back, his hands sliding down to your waist, pulling you impossibly closer to him.

You leaned in as his hands pulled you closer, your back lifting off the wall a little as you kissed him, both of your hands cupping his face now, smiling against his lips at the small sound that left his lips, slightly muffled by your own. God, he sounded even better than you could imagine.

JJ felt his heart thump again in his chest as you leaned into him, your hands gently holding his face, your bodies pressed closer together. The feeling of your lips against his, the way you responded to him, and the small, sweet smile on your face, sent a wave of warmth through him that he didn't quite know what to do with.

He brought one hand to the back of your head once again, his fingers tangling in your hair, gently angling your head so he could kiss you more deeply this time.

He deepened the kiss, his lips moving against yours with more fervor now that you seemed to get the hang of it, his body pressing closer to you, his other hand shifting until it rested on the small of your back, pulling you even closer to him.

He let out a soft, almost needy sound, his tongue gently tracing the outline of your bottom lip, as if silently asking for permission to go further.

Your lips parted hesitantly, a sound similar to his leaving your lips too, your hands cradling his jaw tugging him a little closer to deepen the kiss yourself.

When your lips parted, JJ felt a jolt of desire go through him, your sound like music to his ears. He took that as permission, and his tongue gently dipped into your mouth, exploring and caressing gently, tasting you with a hunger that surprised even him.

He pulled you even closer, his body flush against yours, his hand in your hair, his other splayed on your lower back, holding you tight against him, never wanting to let go.

The kiss was hot and sweet, JJ's tongue dancing with yours, the taste of you igniting a fire in him that he hadn't expected, the combination of vodka seltzer and peach lip-gloss almost making his knees buckle right then and there. He could feel the heat between you growing, the way your body seemed to fit perfectly against his, as if you were made to be this close, to be in his embrace.

He wanted more, so much more, but he forced himself to hold back, knowing that this was your first kiss, and he didn't want to overwhelm you.

Your fingers clutched at his jaw, instinctively trying bring him more close than he already was, your tongue moving against his a little shyly but eager. For your first kiss it was going great, even better than great actually.

JJ's heart skipped a beat as he felt your fingers clutching at his jaw almost desperately, pulling him even closer, your tongue responding shyly but eagerly against his. He was both surprised and flattered, and the feeling of you wanting more, wanting him, was almost overwhelming.

He felt his body respond to you, his desire for you growing by the second, but he forced himself to reign it in, reminding himself that he needed to take things slow, to be careful with you.

He broke the kiss momentarily, pulling away just enough to catch his breath, his eyes locked on yours.

Your brows raised, your eyes fluttering open and taking a deep breath in pressing your lips together, "that-.. that was great, right?" you asked quietly, one of your hands reaching to adjust your glasses nervously.

JJ couldn't help but smile as you spoke up after the kiss, your voice so soft and shy, your glasses now slightly askew on your face. The way you looked so innocent and unsure, it was endearing, and he found himself feeling even more protective of you.

He brought a hand up to gently push your hair out of your face, his fingers brushing your cheek tenderly as he adjusted your glasses too.

"Yeah, mouse...it was great," he said softly. "You're a natural."

Your lips stretched into a shy grin, your eyes locked onto his lips in awe. They were smudged by your lip gloss and slightly swollen and the sight made you almost dizzy, "yeah..?" you questioned breathlessly.

JJ couldn't help but notice your gaze lingering on his lips, the way you looked at him in awe, and he felt his heart thump in his chest once more. He'd never had a girl look at him quite like that before, like he was something precious, something rare.

He gently ran his thumb over your bottom lip, wiping away the bit of smudged lip gloss. Then he smiled, his eyes never leaving yours as he spoke. "Yeah, pretty mouse. You were amazing."

He leaned in again, gently pressing another soft kiss on your lips, tasting the sweet sweetness of your lip gloss. He couldn't get enough of you, the way you responded to him, the way you looked at him, it was all driving him a little crazy.

He reluctantly pulled away, resting his forehead against yours, letting out a soft exhale.

"You've been holding out on me, mouse," he murmured, his hand still gently against your face, his thumb caressing your cheek.

You were a little disappointed the kiss ended quickly but you were sightly confused by his statement, "what'dya mean?" you asked gently.

JJ chuckled softly at your question, his eyes fixed on yours as he spoke, his thumb still tracing a gentle path on your cheek.

"You're a damn natural at this," he said, his voice a little huskier than before, his lips still barely a breath away from yours. "Never would have thought that was your first kiss..."

"Maybe i just like you.." you chuckled, your grin widening a little at your sudden boldness.

JJ felt his heart thump in his chest as you spoke, the smile on your face making his stomach flutter. The idea that you liked him, that this might not just be a one-time thing, was enough to send a rush of emotions through him.

He pulled you closer to him again, his arms wrapping around your waist, holding you tight against him.

"Yeah? You like me, mouse?" he murmured, his mouth hovering just above yours again.

"Yeah.. do you?" you asked still grinning, silently hoping he wouldn't brush off the question and reject you. You didn't know what came over you saying that.

JJ's heart skipped a beat as you asked your question, his arms tightening around you involuntarily, as if the thought of rejecting you was physically painful. In reality, it was.

He'd never felt this way about a girl before, and the idea that you actually liked him, that you might want him as much as he wanted you, was both exciting and terrifying at the same time.

"Yeah, mouse...I like you," he said quietly, his voice gruff, almost vulnerable. How couldn't he?

He leaned in again, capturing your lips in a soft, lingering kiss, his arms holding you tight against him. There was a sense of possessiveness to the way he held you, like he never wanted to let you go.

When he finally broke the kiss, he couldn't help but smile at the look on your face, the way you were looking at him with those big, beautiful eyes of yours. He gently took your chin in his hand, tilting your head back so you were looking up at him.

"But I have to know something,"

"What?" you asked, dazed by his confession and the kiss that followed, not even registering what he said for a moment.

JJ's heart thumped in his chest as he saw how dazed and disoriented you looked, the sight sending a wave of a mixture of affection and satisfaction through him.

He waited until your eyes focused on his, your head still tilted back in his grasp, before he spoke, his voice low and filled with a hint of possessiveness. "You're mine now, right, mouse? You're my girl?"

'Helloooo.. I thought you'd never ask.' you screamed internally. Your brain stopped for a moment and it probably mirrored on your flushed face, "yeah.. no, yeah.." you replied meekly, shock probably evident on your face, even in the dim light of the room you were in.

A hint of a smirk tugged at the corners of JJ's lips as he watched your reaction to his question, the way your brain seemed to short-circuit for a moment, the shock and disbelief on your face. It was honestly adorable, and he couldn't help but feel a sense of satisfaction.

He chuckled softly, his hand still on your chin, his thumb gently caressing your skin. "You don't sound too sure, mouse...you're not trying to back out already, are you?"

"No. Sorry-.. i was just like shocked for a second there... as if that wasn't obvious, i probably looked like a dumbass. But I'm not unsure, god knows.." you rambled, answering his question and it was like your meek nature dropped for a second as you rambled nervously.

JJ chuckled again, watching as your usually shy and quiet demeanor dropped for a second as you rambled nervously. He'd never seen you this talkative before, and he found it strangely endearing, the way you got so flustered and flustered around him.

He kept his hand lightly under your chin, tilting your head back so your eyes stayed on his as he spoke, his voice a gentle but firm.

"Hey, hey, mouse, calm down," he said softly. "No need to ramble like that. I asked a simple question, and I want a simple answer, that's all."

"Yes... god, fuck-.. no. I'm not backing out." you stuttered, locking eyes with him.

JJ felt a wave of warmth and affection go through him as you finally managed to give him a direct answer, your voice a little flustered and your eyes fixed on his. The way you looked at him, so shy and cute but so sure of yourself at the same time, it was a strange mix of endearing and attractive.

He couldn't help but smile, a hint of possessive satisfaction in his gaze as he spoke.

"That's my girl.. my pretty mouse.."

He didn't wait for a response, instead he captured your lips in a soft but firm kiss, his touch was protective, possessive, and despite the gentleness of his kiss, there was a hint of desperate need in the way he held you against him.

You smiled against the kiss once again, your hands cupping his jaw once again, kissing him back almost instantly, still pressed against the wall and you found your self wondering how his legs didn't give out, because yours would've by now if he wasn't holding you up against the wall like that.

JJ's legs were starting to ache a little from holding you up against the wall, but he didn't care. The way you were kissing him, how your small hands were holding his jaw, how your body fit perfectly against his, he wouldn't let you go even if his legs gave out completely. It was worth it.

His hand on your back gripped a little tighter, pulling you even closer to him, his kisses growing more insistent, more urgent, his tongue gently slipping into your mouth.

The taste of you was addictive, and JJ found himself wanting more, needing more, his mouth moving against yours hungrily as he deepened the kiss, loosing some sense of gentleness. His hand in your hair gently pulled, tilting your head back a little, giving him better access to your neck, his lips and teeth nipping and biting at your skin, exploring the sensitive flesh of your throat.

"So.. this isn't just a one time thing right?" you asked hesitantly, tilting your head back gently, your words punctuated by a small breathless moan.

JJ paused for a moment, feeling your head tilt back against his hand, the sound of your breathless moan sending a jolt of electricity through him. For a moment, he just held you there, his mouth still on your neck, his hand still gripping your hair.

He lifted his head after a moment, his breath hot against your skin, his answer a low, gruff murmur against your ear. "Absolutely not, mouse. You think I'd let you go after one kiss? No way in hell..."

"Ah, okay... good.." your eyes met his in the dim light nodding, "that's good—cause i like you a lot.." you mumbled almost desperately leaning in to ghost your lips over his and then kiss him briefly.

JJ's heart thumped in his chest as you spoke, hearing the desperation in your voice, seeing the need in your eyes. It was such a stark contrast to your usual shy and reserved demeanor, but he found himself loving it. He found himself loving seeing you open up like this, loving the fact you wanted him, just as much as he wanted you.

He caught your lips in a brief, soft kiss, before pulling back just enough to speak, his voice hoarse with desire. "Yeah? How much do you like me, mouse?"

"So much.." you almost whined out, your brows scrunching up slightly. You were gaining confidence rapidly and you weren't sure if it was a bad thing or a good one.

JJ's grip on you tightened slightly as you practically whined out your answer, your voice so soft and needy, it was almost enough to make him lose his mind. Seeing you like this, hearing you like this, it was a side of you he'd never seen before, and God, he loved it.

A small, satisfied smile tugged at his lips as he looked down at you, his hand in your hair gripping just a little tighter. He leaned down, his mouth right next to your ear, his breath hot against your skin. "Show me."

You didn't need more encouragement, leaning once again kissing more boldly this time, your hands clutching at his face and moaning softly as your lips met, your hands sliding from his face and into his hair tugging at it in a needy manner. You wanted to make up for all the time you lost pinning from afar, pouring all your affection and feelings into the kiss.

The feeling of you pulling at his hair to kiss—your hands in his hair generally, your moans against his mouth, it was driving JJ absolutely wild. He'd never seen you like this before (not that he had a chance to), so needy and desperate, and it was like a drug, a drug he couldn't get enough of.

He deepened the kiss in response, his mouth moving against yours hungrily, fiercely, his hands sliding down to your hips, pulling you close so your body was flush against his. He'd never wanted someone so much in his life.

As your bodies pressed together, JJ felt his control slipping further and further away, the desire to be a gentleman replaced raw desire. The feeling of you in his arms, your hands in his hair, your body against his, it was all too much, and he found himself struggling to hold back, to keep himself from completely losing control. He pressed you harder against the wall, his body pinning you in place, trapping you between him and the wall, his mouth moving against yours almost brutally, his tongue delving into your mouth with a possessive need.

You matched the pace of his kiss, your fingers almost clawing at his scalp as you kissed him. It was insane, how 3 hours ago roughly you would've never imagined you would be at his friend's house making out with him against the wall—near the door, not even moving to the bed or anything. What was more insane was the fact that you enjoyed kissing JJ so much, and you weren't even shy about it at that point.

You probably should consider yourselves lucky that you were here, in this dark room away from the kegger. Because you probably looked disheveled, your dress bunched up and one of the straps slipped down your shoulder, moaning into his mouth while he pressed you against the wall roughly, positioned between your legs, which were wrapped around his waist loosely. Mind blowing.

JJ was beyond caring about anything besides you at that point. The party, the time, the place, his friends, nothing else mattered except you. The way your body felt against his, the way you were reacting to his kiss, the way you clung to him, it was all he needed in that moment.

He didn't bother to be gentle anymore as he pressed you against the wall, his body pinning you in place, his hands roaming over your body, his mouth devouring yours ruthlessly.

He couldn't get enough of you.

He had no idea how long he held you against the wall like that, his mouth on yours, his body pressed against yours, his hands touching and roaming over you greedily. It could have been minutes or hours, and he wouldn't have cared either way.

Finally, reluctantly, he broke the kiss, pulling back slightly so he could look at you (and breathe), his breathing ragged, his eyes dark with desire. He gently cupped your face in his hand, his fingers tracing softly over your cheek.

When he broke away you took the chance to breathe, seeing as breathing through your nose wasn't enough, panting gently and adjusting your glasses, "That's so-... i wanna do it over and over.." you chuckled breathlessly, your teeth gnawing at your bottom lip.

JJ felt a wave of satisfaction wash over him as he watched you, panting and breathless, the sound of your soft laughter almost making his heart burst in his chest.

He couldn't believe that this was you, the shy and reserved girl he'd always known, the one who barely spoke to a soul, and now here you were, pressed up against a wall, gasping and panting, looking so beautiful it was almost painful. Kissing him nonetheless.

"Yeah? You wanna keep kissing me, mouse?" he said, a small smirk on his face as he watched you gnaw on your lip.

You nodded silently, grinning at him while your eyes darted across his face in awe. If this was what it felt like to have a boyfriend you realized you had been missing out on so many things. But it was worth the wait it seemed, because it was JJ and you wouldn't even be this comfortable doing these things with no one else.

JJ smiled as you nodded, a wave of affection washing over him. He'd never really dated anyone before, but with you, it all just felt so natural, so easy. Just like waking up next you that morning felt. He realized that he was a bit silly for getting scared of the intimacy of that moment. More so while he carried a picture of you in his wallet everywhere he went like a lovesick boyfriend.

He leaned in, gently kissing the side of your neck, his lips trailing down to your shoulder, tasting the bare skin where your dress' strap had slipped down.

"You're so damn beautiful, mouse. All flushed and panting, lookin' like a goddamn mess.."

He pulled back, looking at your disheveled state, your messy hair, your flushed face, the strap of your dress that had slipped down, revealing the skin of your shoulder, and he found himself wanting more. He wanted to see what you looked like completely wrecked, completely undone by him. the thought made his heart thump faster in his chest.

"You know, I can think of a few more things I wanna do with you besides kissing." he said in a low, gruff whisper.

"Like what?" you asked narrowing your eyes, still grinning.

JJ's smile widened as you played coy, your grin and narrowed eyes almost defiant. It was an adorable contrast to the flustered, needy mess you had been just moments before.

He leaned in closer to you, his mouth hovering just above your ear, his voice a soft, seductive murmur.

"Oh, I got a lot of things in mind, mouse. Things that'll make you scream my name, things that'll make you forget your own damn name."

You grimaced teasingly, "that's so corny.." you muttered, chuckling breathlessly. Despite the teasing lilt in your voice, his words were very arousing. Even if in a corny way.

JJ's smirk curled into a wider smile as you teased him, calling him corny. He'd expect no less from you.

He lifted his head, moving his mouth to your ear, his teeth gently nipping at the sensitive skin, as his hand slid up your thigh, lifting up the hem of your dress slightly. "Oh yeah? You want me to be less corny? Or should I show you how corny I can really be?"

His hand continued to slide up your thigh, his fingers slowly moving under your dress, his lips moving from your ear down to your neck, kissing and biting your skin gently, leaving little marks that only the two of you would be able to see. As if he hadn't left blaring red and pink hickies all over your neck already.

He chuckled against your skin, his other hand gripping your hip, pulling you against him firmly. "Or should I just shut up and keep my mouth busy doing something else?"

"I like the last option better.." you smirked, cupping his face once again as he continued to nip at the flesh of your neck, your eyes trained to his lips.

JJ chuckled again, the sound low and rough. He loved how eager you were to be with him, how you wanted him just as much as he wanted you. It was a feeling he'd never experienced before, and it was addictive.

He looked at your eyes, trained on his lips, and he felt a stirring in his gut, a heat pooling within him. Your eyes were practically begging for him to kiss you, and who was he to refuse? He leaned in, his mouth meeting yours in a deep, insistent kiss.

His hand on your hip gripped you tighter, pulling you closer, while his mouth deepened the kiss, his tongue pushing past your lips, delving into your mouth, hungry and insistent. He wanted more, he needed more.

His hand under your dress moved higher, his fingers tracing over your inner thigh, his touch setting off sparks of pleasure that shot through your body as his finger brushed over your clothed core before he moved them away.

His hands moving under your dress more insistently, groping the flesh of your inner thigh. The feeling sent a kind of warmth at the pit of your stomach that you never felt before. You moaned softly into the kiss, your head leaning forward gently deepening the kiss, as if you were afraid he'd pull away.

The sound of your moan sent a jolt through JJ, his blood heating at the sound. Your soft, needy little moan was like music to his ears, and it only made him want you more. He wanted to see what other noises he could coax from you, what other ways he could make you moan and moan and moan.

He deepened the kiss in response, his tongue twining with yours, his hand gripping your thigh a little tighter, his fingers tracing higher, seeking as much of your skin as he could touch.

He broke the kiss, his lips moving to your neck, sucking and biting at the sensitive flesh, leaving little marks that would surely be visible later.

His hand moved higher, his fingers brushing against the edge of your underwear once again, feeling the heat and dampness between your legs. "Goddammit, mouse. You're so damn hot, you know that? and so wet.."

No one had referred to you as hot. It was corny to think about but as his fingers brushed higher between your legs you couldn't help but let out a shudder and a small moan, looking at him with a look between amusement and arousal.

JJ's heart thumped faster in his chest at the sight and sound of you, your look a mix of amusement and arousal, your head tilting back slightly as his fingers touched you. It was a sight he wanted to see over and over again, he wanted to make you moan and mewl like that over and over again. Didn't matter when. Taking him from behind? Above him? Under him? In your room? On the beach? JJ wanted to see all of those and then some.

His mouth moved down to your neck, leaving a trail of biting kisses along your skin as his fingers traced over the damp fabric of your underwear.

He could feel how wet and hot you were, and it was sending his mind reeling, his body tight with need, his control slipping further and further away.

He could feel the heat growing between you, could feel it like a physical presence in the room, and it was all he could do to push down the urge to lose himself completely.

His mouth moved to your ear, his breath hot against your skin, his voice a rough, ragged whisper. "Want you so damn bad, mouse. Can't think of anything else but you. Not right now, not for the past weeks."

Your thighs clenched a little, your legs wrapping around his waist tighter, almost shyly as his fingers ghosted over you, rubbing slow circles over your clit. It was dizzying, and a little pathetic to be honest, to shudder just from a few feather light touches, especially when you were probably so turned on he could feel it. You were beyond caring, your breathing heavy and your head thrown back a little.

JJ groaned at the sight of you, your thighs clenching around his waist, your legs wrapped around his body. The way you were responding to his touch, the way you were panting and shuddering, it was driving him crazy.

He pressed himself against you, his hard erection straining against his shorts, pressing against your core. He bit back another moan as he felt your heat against him, his control stretched thin, his mind clouded by the need to be inside you or anything to release the pressure in his lower belly.

He bit back another moan as he felt your heat against him, his control stretched thin, his mind clouded by the need to be closer, to be inside you, to make you scream his name in pleasure.

He pushed you against the wall, his hands gripping your hips, his mouth moving to your ear.

"You have no idea what you do to me, mouse. No idea how bad I want you right now. Gonna give you what you want..."

Your hands gripped at his shoulder gently, your legs pulling his closer rolling your hips hesitantly against his obvious arousal, without realizing. You were still pressed up against the wall so the action was a bit strained but full of need, and your eyes were locked despite feeling so shy you could pass out. The sight of you would probably get a nun to pass out though, all disheveled and letting out sinful sounds, letting him dry hump you. It was unbelievable to you that this was the same person having trouble while ordering food or speaking to the cashier.

JJ's breath hitched in his throat as you pushed against him, your body rolling against his, your need for him clear in every movement you made. It was a sight he'd never imagined seeing from you, the usually quiet, shy girl who was now in his arms, moaning softly, looking at him with a look that was a mix of shyness and desire.

He knew he should stop this, he knew he should pull away before they both did something they might regret.

But he was past the point of caring.

He slammed you back against the wall, his body fitting against yours tightly, like two pieces of a puzzle.

He lifted you up just slightly, his hands grabbing your thighs and pulling your legs around his waist more securely, the move bringing your core against him in a way that made him bite back a moan.

His breath was hot against your neck as he started to speak, his voice strained with need and desperation. "Mouse, you gotta say something, or I'm gonna lose it."

Before you spoke another soft moan left your lips involuntarily, "what... what am i supposed to say?" you asked, your hands still digging into his shoulders, taking small fistfuls of his shirt, your heart beating so loudly that it rang in your ears.

JJ gritted his teeth as you replied, your soft moan and voice driving him closer to the edge, his self-control hanging on by a thread.

He pressed you hard against the wall, his hips grinding against you, making sure you could feel how hard he was, how badly he wanted you. "Say something, anything. Just gotta make sure you want this, mouse. Or I might do something we'll both regret."

"Regret? no.. fuck no." you questioned, another moan leaving your lips as you spoke, "i thought it was obvious i wanted this.." your voice was strained and soft, still shy and a little overwhelmed to speak properly.

Your words, so out of character for you yet so sweet and hot, sent a surge of desire coursing through JJ's body.

He wanted you, wanted you so badly he could barely think straight.

He let out a guttural moan, his hips grinding against you again, his head buried in the crook of your neck, his voice rough and ragged against your skin. "Just making sure... didn't want to assume anything."

He lifted his head, looking at you, his eyes darkened with need and lust, his breathing heavy. He leaned in, his mouth hovering just over yours, his breath hot against your lips.

"Need you, mouse. Need you so damn bad, I don't think I can hold back anymore and be a gentleman."

"What.. what do we do now?" you asked, and regretted it after. It was a stupid question but you were itching to ask it Even if it ruined the mood in the process.

JJ chuckled softly, finding your question adorable and incredibly sexy at the same time. It was the perfect mix of shyness and boldness, completely unexpected from the normally reserved you, and he found he liked it a lot.

He pushed you up against the wall again, his body pressed against yours, his mouth moving to your neck, leaving a trail of soft, open-mouthed kisses along your skin. Not bites, just tender kisses "We do what we want. Anything and everything we want."

"Yeah but... like, i mean i dunno how this works.. you gotta coach me through or something.." you snorted in amusement at your own words, a bit distracted by the way he was kissing your neck.

JJ's mouth curled into a smirk against your neck as you spoke, the sound of your voice, so soft and vulnerable, mixed with the shyness and eagerness in your words, was like music to his ears.

He lifted his head, his eyes meeting yours, his voice low and gravelly as he spoke.

"You want me to coach you, huh?"

He leaned in closer, his lips brushing against your ear, a low, ragged whisper. "I think I can do that."

His hands tightened around your thighs, his fingers gripping you firmly as he held you against the wall, his mouth moving back to your neck, nipping and biting at the sensitive skin.

He gently rocked his hips against you, his jeans rubbing against your core, the sensation sending sparks of pleasure through both of your bodies.

He spoke again, his voice rough and ragged, his breath hot against your ear. "This okay, mouse? Feel good?"

You let out a long hum nodding, the sound mixed with a moan at the feeling of his hips against you, your legs spreading a little, as much as they could while being wrapped around his waist and your back still against the wall.

JJ groaned at the sound of your moan, your body responding to his touch, your legs wrapping around his waist, opening you up to him and the hot friction of his body against yours.

He pressed himself against you, his hips rolling slowly, his erection rubbing against you through the denim of his jeans, the friction making him bite back a moan. "You like that, mouse? You like how it feels when I press against you like this?"

He rocked his hips against you again, his movements slow and deliberate, wanting to memorize every soft, needy little sound you made as he touched you.

His hands moved up, gripping your hips, guiding your body against his, the friction between you both making it harder and harder for him to think straight. "Want more.. want more of those soft, pretty little sounds. Let me hear you moan for me, mouse."

"I need more.." you found yourself speaking between the quiet moans, your expression clearly flustered but very very aroused. Sure you've been turned on before but it seemed to be different when you had another person being turned on by you too. And JJ nonetheless. It was like a dream.

JJ swore loudly as you spoke, your words sending a surge of desire through his body. He loved that sound, your breathless words, the way you were asking for more from him, wanting him as badly as he wanted you.

He grabbed your hips again, his fingers digging into the soft flesh, holding you tightly against him. "Yeah? You need more, mouse? Just tell me what you want, baby, I'll give it to you. Anything you want." he found himself whispering almost desperately, last part coming out as a soft plea. Which he would have been embarrassed about if he wasn't so damn turned on and tipsy on top of it.

"I dunno... what can you give me?" you asked, which frankly sounded better in your head than it did into words "furthest i got was... well fingering?" you spoke hesitantly, feeling unreal that you were uttering these words out loud, "myself of course.."

JJ gritted his teeth as you spoke, your words hitting him straight in the gut, making his cock throb in his jeans.

He groaned softly, his breath hot against your ear, his voice rough and ragged. "Is that so? You never done anything with anyone before?"

"Obviously not.." you chuckled, shifting against him a little, still holding on to his shoulders.

JJ's heart thumped in his chest at the sound of your soft laughter, and he felt a strange mix of desire and protectiveness wash over him. The thought that you had never done anything with anyone else, that you were all his, was both hot and endearing at the same time.

He leaned in, his mouth moving to your neck again, his lips leaving a trail of soft kisses along your skin.

"I like that."

His hands tightened on your hips, his body pressing against yours even more firmly, his need for you growing with each passing second.

He spoke again, his voice low and rough. "That means I get to be your first... your only."

"Yeah.." you hummed, your arms wrapping around his neck pressing your bodies incredibly close.

JJ let out a low groan as you pressed your body against his, your arms wrapping around his neck, the gesture intimate and sweet but also incredibly erotic.

He tilted his head, his mouth moving to your ear, his breath hot against your skin. "And I plan on making it unforgettable for you, mouse."

He started to move his hips again, a slow, steady rhythm that sent jolts of pleasure through both of you.

His hands moved slowly down your thighs, his touch gentle as he caressed your skin, wanting to memorize every inch of you, wanting to learn what made your breath hitch and your body shutter against his.

He was careful not to get too carried away, still wanting to make sure you were enjoying this, still wanting to make sure it was okay.

"That's nice.." you whispered, your brain overwhelmed by the feelings coursing through you. You were clinging to him, almost like you were melding into one, and you could feel your head getting fuzzier with lust. It was exhilarating, his smell was surrounding you and you couldn't get enough of how soft his hair was. Your hands were moving through it, raking through the strands slowly, messing it up even more than it already was.

JJ let out a soft moan as you tangled your fingers in his hair, the feeling of your touch sending a shiver down his spine.

He loved the way you held him, the way your body clung to his, your legs wrapped around his waist, your arms around his neck, like you were trying to get as close to him as possible. He shifted his hips a little, changing the angle, his movement rubbing against you in a way that made your breath hitch in your throat.

He could feel the way you shivered and trembled against him as he moved, and it only fueled his desire for you even more.

He leaned in, his mouth moving to your neck again, his lips ghosting over your skin, his breath hot and ragged against your flesh, his mind swimming from your perfume.

"Sound so damn good, mouse. Like music. I want to hear more of those pretty little sounds you make."

"Are.. should we go further?" you asked gently, tilting your head back a little against the wall, the pleasure of grinding was good, but it wasn't enough, especially with your underwear and his jeans still on.

JJ's breath hitched in his throat at your question, the implications of it sending a surge of desire through his body.

He pulled back just a bit, looking at you, his eyes dark with need and lust. "You want to take it further? Are you sure you're ready for that, mouse?"

"I dunno... well yeah I'm ready... but like am i ready?" you asked, hoping he'd catch what you meant.

JJ smiled at your words, his eyes softening a bit as he realized what you were getting at.

He lifted a hand to your chin, gently lifting your head up so you were looking at him, his thumb brushing against your bottom lip softly. "You mean like, are you ready for me?"

You grimaced awkwardly, grinning a little, "yeah.." you chuckled nodding.

JJ chuckled as well, the sound soft and affectionate. It was cute, the way you were being so shy and awkward, especially considering the position you were currently in, legs wrapped around his waist and pushed up against the wall.

He leaned in, his mouth moving to your neck again, leaving soft affectionate kisses along your skin as he spoke. "Don't worry, mouse. I'll take care of you... just tell me if you want me to stop, okay?"

He shifted his weight a little, adjusting his body against yours, his hips grinding against you again, the move more deliberate and direct this time, making sure he was pressed tightly against your core, the friction sending sparks of pleasure through both of you.

You nodded at his words, knowing if you wanted to stop, you would have shied away a long time ago. The movement caused another wave of heat wash through you, another moan escaping your lips, more sweet than the others.

JJ groaned loudly at the sound of your moan, the sweet, plaintive sound making his jeans feel even tighter and more constricting than before. He leaned in, his mouth moving to your ear as he rocked his hips against you, the friction sending sparks through both of your bodies. "You make the prettiest noises, mouse. Can't wait to hear you really let loose."

He shifted his hips again, changing the angle, a low curse falling from his lips as he was able to grind against you even more firmly than before, his jean-clad erection pressed hard against your core.

He lifted his head, looking at you, his eyes glazed with lust and need, his voice ragged and rough as he spoke.

"Feel that, mouse? That's what you do to me… just from hearing those pretty sounds you make.. just from kissing you."

One of your hands slid down his chest from his shoulder, your finger teasing his belt and toying with the belt loop gently, a sudden spark of confidence igniting in you.

JJ's breath hitched as you trailed your hand down his chest and towards his belt, your touch making his heart thump even harder in his chest.

He watched as you toyed with the belt loop, his eyes locking onto your fingers, the sight making his cock twitch in his jeans. "Mouse, what're you doing?"

You shrugged, your eyes watching him intently as one of your hands continued to toy with his belt loop. You suddenly felt more bold, your fingers slowly undoing it. You expression stayed shy and flustered, despite what you were doing, a small smile tugging at your lips.

JJ's breath hitched again as your fingers undid his belt, the unexpected move making his heart thump even harder in his chest. He watched you intently, his eyes dark with lust and need, his body tense with anticipation.

He swallowed hard, trying to maintain his composure despite the way your touch was making him feel.

"M-mouse, you don't have to-"

He broke off as you started to undo his button and zipper, the sound of the zipper being undone sounding loud in the quiet room. He could feel his heart hammering in his chest, thump thump thump, like he had just run a marathon. Or seen a ghost. Or fuck it, both.

He was torn between wanting to stop you and wanting to see how far you were willing to go.

He was about to say something, to stop you, to tell you that you didn't have to do this, that he didn't want you to feel pressured into something you weren't ready for.

But then your hand slowly moved to the front of his shorts, palming him through the thin fabric of his boxers, and all words flew out of his mind like a flock of startled birds.

You didn't tug the jeans down, you weren't sure if you could in this position anyway without unwrapping your legs from his waist. But your boldness grew, especially when you got the belt undone with just one hand, undid his zipper and pressed your palm against his boxer clad erection. The touch was slow, not rough or fast, just tentative, your brows raising ever so slightly.

JJ's brain short-circuited. All thoughts, all words, all coherent thought gone. All that was left was the sweet, soft pressure of your hand against him, the slow, hesitant touch, so different from what he was used to, so different from what he expected. It was like electricity flowing through his veins, setting every nerve ending on fire.

He let out a sharp, ragged exhale, his eyelids fluttering shut, his head lolling forward, his forehead resting against your shoulder, almost a little out of desperation.

His breathing was ragged and uneven, his body trembling slightly as he tried to control himself, tried to keep from losing control completely. He felt like his whole world had narrowed down to just that one spot where your hand was pressed against him, the touch sending waves of pleasure through his entire body.

He didn't dare move, didn't dare do or say anything, afraid that any motion or sound would break the spell that you had cast over him.

Unsure of what to do, and frankly a little paralyzed by shyness, your thumb rubbed small hesitant circles, applying just a little pressure where your were holding him, gnawing at your bottom lip as you listened to every breath he took and every sound that left his mouth.

JJ's breath hitched again, sharper and rougher than before, his whole body tensing at the feel of your thumb rubbing against him, the small, hesitant circles sending jolts of pleasure through his body.

He groaned softly, almost like it was against his will, his body pressing helplessly into you.

"Mouse… don't… mmmphh…"

He couldn't form a coherent thought, much less a sentence. All he could do was let out soft, ragged sounds, little moans and groans that escaped his lips without his permission. He was trembling now, his whole body taut with need and desire, every nerve ending on fire under your touch. Which he found to be unusual, given JJ wasn't one to shy away or get this worked up over such soft and tentative touches.

He tried to speak, tried to say something, but all that came out was a strangled moan, his body arching helplessly into you.

You were still pressed against the wall, legs wrapped around his waist and your other arm wrapped around his neck for support. Your hand continued to rub through the fabric of his boxers, your eyes darting down from time to time to watch your own hand in awe.

JJ's body was practically thrumming with tension, his muscles straining to hold himself still, to keep from grinding against you the way he wanted to. He was hanging on by a thread, barely holding it together, his breathing coming in ragged, uneven gasps.

He lifted his head from your shoulder, his eyes locking onto yours, his gaze dark and intense, his eyes almost feral with desire.

"Mouse I... please…"

He sounded almost desperate now, his voice ragged and rough. He tried to pull back a little, to give you a chance to stop this before it went too far, but his body seemed to have a will of its own, his hips pressing against you involuntarily, seeking more friction, more contact, more of you.

He was struggling to speak, his words coming out in broken gasps. "Mouse, if you…. If you keep… mmmph… touching me like that…"

Your brain short circuited at the look of desperation on his face, especially at your shy and soft touch. Your eyes were raking over his face, and you wanted more too but the position you were in was kinda awkward and limiting, glancing over his shoulder at the bed.

JJ could feel your gaze on his face, your eyes raking over his features, and he knew what you were thinking.

He leaned in closer, his mouth moving to your ear, his breath hot against your skin. "Mouse... we need to get on the bed..."

He shifted his weight a little, his movements more deliberate now, his muscles flexing as he readjusted his hold on you. He started to take a few steps towards the bed, his hands on your hips, holding you firmly against him, supporting your weight as he moved.

He was careful and gentle as he walked, making sure not to drop or hurt you as he moved across the room. He didn't want to break the moment by being clumsy.

He reached the bed and gently laid you down on the mattress, his body covering yours, his arms on either side of you, holding himself up so as not to put his full weight on you.

He looked down at you, his gaze roaming over your face, taking in every feature, every freckle, every little detail. You looked so sweet and innocent like this, lying under him on the bed, your hair fanning out around you like a halo.

He was breathing hard, his chest rising and falling with each ragged breath, his heart hammering in his chest like it was trying to break out of his ribcage.

As he set you down on the bed your body relaxed, reaching up to take off your glasses gently and set them down on the nightstand near the bed, your hands then cupping his face. He looked so pretty all flushed and looking down at you with his hair all messy and draping down too as he leaned over you.

JJ's eyes darkened further at the feel of your hands on his face, your touch so gentle and soft. Nobody had ever looked at him the way you were looking at him now, like he was something precious, something special.

"Mouse..."

He leaned down, his body pressing against yours, his mouth moving to your neck, his lips brushing over your sensitive skin, leaving soft, tender kisses along the curve of your shoulder.

"What JJ?" you asked quietly, a small chuckle leaving your lips as he slid the straps of your summer dress gently to kiss your shoulders and neck, the feeling a little ticklish and arousing you more if that was possible.

"You... mmmph... are so... pretty.."

JJ's words were mumbled against your skin, his mouth making its way up your neck, leaving soft, tender kisses as he went. His hands were moving now, roaming over your body, tracing every curve, every contour, like he was trying to memorize the feel of you.

Your body felt so small and fragile under him, your skin so soft and smooth, and he was being careful not to hurt you, even though his hands were practically aching with the need to touch you everywhere.

He moved lower, his mouth moving down to your collarbone, leaving more kisses there, his lips warm and soft against your skin. He was breathing in your scent, a mixture of vanilla and something sweeter, something he couldn't quite place but that he was quickly becoming addicted to. You smelled like vanilla and strawberries last time he saw you.

His hands moved to the hem of your dress, lifting the fabric slowly, pushing it up over your hips, exposing more and more of your skin to his gaze.

Your stomach fluttered at his muffled compliment, your hands resting into his hair, raking through it almost soothingly as he continued to kiss your neck and shoulders tenderly yet hungrily, his hands lifting your dress little by little.

JJ groaned softly as you ran your hands through his hair, the feeling sending a shiver down his spine. He leaned into the touch, almost like a cat being petted, his body arching into you instinctively.

He pulled back a bit, looking down at the exposed flesh of your stomach, his hands roaming over your skin, tracing over the soft curves of your hips and thighs.

He gently spread your legs, his body settling in between them, his weight pressing down on you, pinning you to the mattress.

He leaned down again, his mouth moving to your stomach, his lips leaving a trail of hot, moist kisses along your skin, slowly making their way lower and lower, his hands pushing your dress up over your hips, exposing more of you to his hungry gaze.

As he spread your legs, settling between them and trailing the reverent kisses down your stomach your breath hitched. It was like your body was already aware of what he was about to do, his hands bunching up the soft sage green material of your slip dress pushing it up. Despite being flustered beyond belief, your eyes were following his every move, your brain focused on the feeling of his lips on your warm skin.

JJ could feel the way your body was reacting to his touch, could feel the way you were arching up into him, seeking more of his touch, more of his attention. It was like your body was begging him to continue, like you were desperate for him to keep going.

He lifted his head, his eyes locking with yours, his expression intense and hungry. He held your gaze for a moment, almost like he was asking for permission, then his head dipped down again, his mouth moving down over your stomach and lower, lower...

His hands found the waistband of your panties, his fingers hooking into the elastic, gently pulling them down, his lips trailing over your hipbone, leaving hot kisses in their wake.

His breathing was ragged now, his body tense with need, but he was still being gentle, still being careful not to move too fast, to move too rough. He wanted to draw this out, to make this special for you both.

Your brows shot up as he pulled your underwear down slowly, your hips raising from the bed a little as if to help him, without even realizing.

JJ smiled at the way your body responded to his touch, the way you lifted your hips to help him, even before you realized you were doing it. It was so damn cute, almost innocent.

He let out a soft chuckle, his fingers still hooked into the elastic of your panties. "Eager, are we?"

He tugged your underwear down the rest of the way, his eyes never leaving yours, watching your face the whole time, taking in every little expression, every little gasp and moan that escaped your lips.

He tossed the scrap of fabric aside and gently parted your legs, his hands tracing up your inner thighs, his touch almost feather light, leaving a trail of fire in its wake.

He settled in between your legs and hooked them over his shoulders, his body pressed against you, his chest rising and falling with each deep, ragged breath. He was looking down at you, his eyes roaming over your naked lower body, taking in every detail, every curve, every inch of exposed skin.

He was so close, so close to where you wanted him, but he was still taking his time, still being gentle, still being patient. He was savoring this moment, wanting to commit it to memory.

Your breathing grew more ragged as he leaned down, gnawing at your bottom lip as you gazed at him in anticipation. He looked even more beautiful, between your legs, his hair tickling the inside of your thigh gently as kissed and teased you, your hand darting out to push it out of his face gently and shakily.

When you touched his hair, JJ felt a shiver run through his body, your touch sending jolts of electricity through his veins. He leaned into the touch, his eyes fluttering shut for a moment, before looking back up at you again, his expression almost feral now, his eyes burning with need and desire.

He gently parted your legs a little more, giving himself more room to work with, and gently blew a stream of hot air over the sensitive flesh of your core watching your face intently for a reaction.

The sensation made your legs twitch involuntarily, and a strangled moan escaped your lips before you could stop it. JJ saw the way your body reacted to his touch and a cocky smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. "Hmm... like that, do you?"

You nodded, your thighs threatening to close around his face for a split moment in nervousness, your teeth still gnawing at your bottom lip. It was insane, how just a small huff of air made you react so.. eagerly. It would've been embarrassing too, if you weren't so turned on.

JJ chuckled softly at your reaction, your legs almost closing around him involuntarily. He could feel the tension in your body, could feel the way you were already so worked up and desperate for him.

"Oh, I see... you're a little needy, aren't you, Mouse?" He leaned down again, his mouth skimming over your slick fold, his tongue darting out to tease you, just barely making contact. He wanted to prolong this for as long as he could, to draw this out as long as he could.

He flattened his tongue against you, slowly licking upwards to brush against your clit, his eyes fluttering shut as he took in the taste of you, his hands tightening on your thighs. God, you tasted so good JJ wasn't sure how long he was gonna be slow and gentle for.

When he applied more pressure you couldn't help the moan that escaped your lips, almost like a whimper. The contact was slow but your body felt it like a strike of lightning, the hand in his hair taking a fistful of it. Your body arched up gently, almost like a twitch, your eyes fluttering closed.

JJ groaned softly as you tugged at his hair, the feeling sending a spark of pain through his body that somehow turned into pleasure, heightening the need that was coursing through him. He wanted more, more of you, more of your little gasps and whimpers. He knew he had you right where he wanted you now, lost in lust and desire, eager and willing and completely under his spell. "so sensitive..."

He pressed a gentle kiss against you, just above your clit, almost like he was teasing you, and when he spoke his voice was thick with need.

"Mouse... tell me... what you want... I'll give you anything... just say it... tell me what you want"

Maisy had told you before how getting eaten out felt. Of course you could only imagine it up until a point, given you never actually experienced the thing. 'The thing is, if the guy doesn't wanna do it, it's just routine for the both of you... but god, Y/n/n if he does...' Maisy told you before. And you understood, somehow in this moment her words made sense because JJ actually seemed to revel into what he was doing.

You tried steady your breathing, opening your eyes to gaze down at him, and the sight alone almost made you finish. He looked like he was the one on the receiving end, not you, his eyes already watching you intently, "just.. keep going that's... that feels good." surprisingly you managed to speak, even praise him a little.

JJ felt a surge of pride at your words, his ego growing even more as you praised him. It was music to his ears, to hear you telling him he was doing well, that he was making you feel good. He smirked, knowing that he had you right where he wanted you now, completely at his mercy.

He chuckled again, his breath warm against your skin as he spoke. "As you wish, sweet thing..."

He lowered his head again, his mouth finding your most sensitive spot once more. His tongue traced slow, teasing circles around your clit, not quite touching it, but giving you just enough to keep you on edge. His hands were still on your thighs, holding you firmly in place, making sure you couldn't move before JJ leaned in, his tongue flicking out to trace your slit, a low moan escaping him at the taste of your arousal. "Fuck, baby, you taste like fuckin' heaven," he rasped still not over the way you tasted, his grip tightening on your thighs as he dove in, his mouth covering your pussy completely.

Your head tilted back against the pillow once more, your thighs closing around his head a little, small moans leaving your lips with every movement of his tongue, his face buried between your legs. The sight was probably so lustful, that if someone were to walk in they wouldn't even recognize you. Your hand still in his hair, hips arching to meet every movement of his lips or tongue.

JJ's mind reeled as you wrapped your thighs around his head. It was such an intimate gesture, almost possessively keeping him in place, like you were claiming him as yours. The sight would have driven any man wild, but even more so with JJ, who had never in his life ever felt wanted or loved or needed. He'd never in his life felt even remotely treasured, and suddenly here you were, trembling and arching up into him, making these little needy sounds, clutching at him, as if you never wanted to let him go.

It was too much, nearly overloading his brain.

He groaned against your pussy, the vibrations sending shockwaves of pleasure coursing through your core. He could feel your thighs trembling around his head, your nails digging into his scalp as you gripped his hair tighter. Fuck, he loved how responsive you were, how fuckin' eager for his touch.

He focused his efforts on your clit, sucking and flicking the sensitive bud with the skill of a guy who knew exactly what he was doing. His tongue delved deeper, plunging into your tight heat, fucking you with broad strokes that had your hips bucking against his face.

But JJ wanted more, so much more than that. He slid two fingers knuckle-deep into your dripping cunt, pumping them in and out of your tight heat at a good pace. At the same time, he zeroed in on your clit with laser focus, sucking the sensitive bud between his lips and flicking it with his tongue.

JJ curled his fingers just right, rubbing that special spot deep inside you that made your toes curl and your eyes roll back in your head. "Come on, sweetheart. Give it to me. Wanna hear you scream my fuckin' name as I make you cum harder than you ever have before," he demanded his hot breath washing over your pussy, his fingers pumping faster,

You were already close, your writhing somehow intensifying under his mouth, your body almost arched up in place in pleasure. Your voice drawled out, moans a little higher and more longer now, your legs wrapped around his head and slung over his shoulders loosely.

JJ could feel that you were close, could hear it in your voice, could see it in the way your body was writhing and arching against him. He was loving every second of this, loving the power he had over you, the way he was making you feel. It was addictive, the feeling, and he knew he was hooked for life.

He lifted his head for a moment still pumping his fingers in and out of you, his eyes burning into yours, a smirk on his lips, even as he spoke.

"Are you gonna come for me, Mouse?" His voice was deep and hoarse, almost rough, his lips damp and hair mussed up as he locked eyes with you, watching you intently, waiting for your answer.

Fuck yeah, you thought, the only thing you could manage was a small whimper as you nodded, your brows scrunched up in pleasure, eyes raking over his face as he lifted his head for a moment. God, he was so pretty, and not only because he was eating you out.

JJ smiled at the whimper that came from your lips, his heart swelling with some strange foreign feeling in his chest, a feeling he'd only ever dared to dream of, but never knew how to recognize or understand. It was love and tenderness and something deeper. He ignored it though, he could think about that later, not while he ate you out and finger-fucked you.

When you nodded, JJ let out a low growl, deep in the back of his throat, his eyes boring into yours, his words hoarse and thick with need.

"Good girl..." he said, his free hand tightening on your thigh, his mouth diving back down to give you what you wanted, what you needed. The praise fell easily from his lips, even though he didn't know why he was doing it. It felt right in the moment, and JJ always followed his gut feelings, even if they didn't make sense in retrospect. And in this moment, his gut was telling him to praise you, to make sure you knew how good you were being.

You mewled quietly at his small praise not having much time to think about how it made you feel because he was back to working on you, even more intensely than last time and you knew you were just on the edge. You could feel it in your lower stomach, both of your hands in his hair now. If you weren't so worked up maybe you'd apologize for squeezing him that tightly but in the moment you didn't have it in you. Your moans, although still shy and characteristic to you, were now a little more high pitched, a little less held back.

JJ could feel your arousal coating his chin and dripping down onto the bed under him and it was so hot. The obscene sound of your juices squelching as he pumped his fingers in and out of your tight heat filled the room, mingling with the crude slurps and suckles of his greedy mouth.

"I'm gonna.. I think I'm-.." you panted, your words shaky as they slipped from your parted lips, melting with moans and sighs of pleasure. You looked down at him, brows knitting up in pleasure at the focus etched on his face as he just watched his fingers drive inside you, making eye contact with you before diving in once again.

Eye contact was so hot, especially when he looked like that. And did the things that had your eyes rolling in the back of your head, and your hands grinding his face against you almost desperately. Your thighs were spasming gently, back arching a little as you clamped your legs around his head like a snake encircling its prey.

JJ couldn't care less if you were squeezing his head with your thighs. In fact, he loved it, loved knowing that he was making you feel so good that you couldn't help but cling to him in pleasure. It was the best he'd ever felt in his life, all his senses flooded with you, with the taste and the feel of you round his fingers or the sound of you, completely coming undone for him.

He could feel your walls starting to flutter and clench around his fingers, your body tensing as your orgasm rapidly approached. He gazed up at you with lust-darkened baby blues, a small grin spreading across his face as he watched you come undone above him.

"That's it, baby.. look at me while I make you cum," he murmured softly, his fingers pumping faster, his tongue lashing over your clit with firm strokes. "I wanna see those pretty eyes roll back in your head as I send you fuckin' flyin'."

JJ could feel your thighs trembling violently around his head, your nails digging into his scalp like a woman possessed. He fuckin' loved it, loved the way your body responded to his touch, the way you grinded your soaked cunt against his face like you were fuckin' starved for it.

He felt your body tensing up, on the edge, and then he heard you whining his name in a whimper and that was it for him. It was the sexiest sound he'd ever heard in his life, and he knew he would be replaying that sound in his head on repeat, over and over again.

A few more moments and the pressure in your lower stomach snapped, your body arching up and breathing rattling gently, lips parted in pleasure as you let out a strangled moan, legs wrapped around his head more tightly than before. You tensed for a couple of long seconds, head thrown back in ecstasy as your thighs closed around his head even more tightly, the orgasm washing over you and knocking your breath out of your lungs, your moans almost inaudible.

JJ groaned as you squeezed his head between your thighs, the feeling almost painful and yet somehow pleasing. He didn't mind being squeezed tight, in fact he loved it. It made him feel like he was wanted, like he was desired and treasured and needed, all things he'd never in his life ever felt or experienced before. He pushed down the strange unfamiliar feeling that was beginning to form again in his gut, and instead focused on you, on making you feel good.

He didn't let up, though. No, JJ kept suckin' and lickin' and fingering your spasming cunt, workin' you through each wave of your intense climax. He wanted to draw it out, make it last as fuckin' long as possible. Wanted you to feel this fuckin' incredible every second until you were completely fuckin' spent.

He gave you a few more gentle licks, just enough to ease you down from the high, before lifting his head again, his eyes burning into yours.

He smirked, his tongue darting out and licking his lips, binging his arousal-coated fingers up to his mouth, makin' a show of licking them clean. 

If it would have been humanly possible you would've came a second time as his smirked up at you, licking his lips and fingers in the most sinful and erotic way. Genuinely how was this guy between your legs, instead of sleeping with someone more.. his type? "goodness gracious.." you muttered, your head tilting back on the pillow, one of your hands reaching to rub your face, the other still in his hair, almost limp now. Just like your thighs.

JJ chuckled at the way you spoke, your voice hoarse and shaky as you tried to catch your breath. He was pretty smug, proud of the effect he had on you, smug to know that he had made you feel good. He gently patted your hip, signaling for you to release his head from the grip of your thighs.

He rose up on his elbow, looking at you, his eyes roaming over your face and down to your body. You looked utterly debauched and JJ loved the sight, almost like he'd won some kind of trophy.

He smirked again as he leaned forward, propping himself up above you. His face was just inches from yours, his voice low and rough as he spoke. "Did I do good, sweetheart?"

Did he do good?? it was like you went to heaven and back for a split second there, and he's asking you if he did 'good'. You ascended to the heavens and he was smirking casually down at you like it was the most normal thing, "good..?" was all that you managed to ask, your voice breaking a little full of disbelief.

JJ chuckled at your reaction, his ego swelling even more. The fact that you were so stunned, almost like you were dumbfounded, just from what he did to you, made his chest puff up in pride a little.

He lowered himself down to rest his head on your stomach, his cheek pressing against your skin. He looked up at you from this angle with a smug look on his face. "I'll take that as a yes."

He nuzzled his head against your stomach, almost like a cat, his arms coming up to wrap around your waist, holding you loosely. He was strangely content in this moment, his mind quiet for once, his thoughts not running a mile a minute. Instead, he was focused on purely you, on the way you felt against him, the way you smelled, the way your hands felt on his skin.

As he nuzzled his head against your stomach you took the time to steady your erratic breathing, your hand reaching up to rake through his hair. You were a little in shock, not believing that this had actually happened and that he was actually your boyfriend, "... so you're my boyfriend now right?" you asked after almost a minute of silence, save for your breathing, regretting the hesitant question instantly. He called you his girl, or something along those lines when he was kissing you, but JJ didn't say the word boyfriend and girlfriend.

JJ's heart nearly stopped at your question, at the use of the word 'boyfriend'. For a second he just laid there, his face buried in your stomach, his arms wrapped around your waist. He could feel his stomach clenching with some strange emotion again, his heart beating in his chest, his mind racing with thoughts.

He lifted his head slowly, looking up at you, his eyes searching your face. He wasn't good with emotions, but he felt so strongly for you that the thought of being your boyfriend felt like a lifeline.

For a second you just looked at each other, which scared you mildly, regretting the awkward question more now that you were just staring into his blue and intense eyes silently. You felt your self grimace awkwardly, "sorry.."

JJ shook his head, his arms holding you a little tighter, almost possessively.

"Don't apologize. It was a good question."

He said it quietly, his eyes still fixed on your face, his expression unreadable. His heart was still thumping in his chest, and he still didn't understand the feeling that was rushing through his body, but he knew he should pull himself together and answer your question before you got even more worried.

Your grimace deepened, suddenly feeling awkward at having asked in the first place and making everything strange and quiet. It made a lump form in your throat, your breath rattling a little when you inhaled.

JJ's eyes traced your face, taking in the expression on your face. He could see that you were starting to get uneasy and he didn't like it, he liked you happy and at ease with him, so he decided to speak.

"Mouse..." He said quietly, his voice soft, his fingers tracing small circles on your skin.

"What?" you asked meekly cutting him off gently, your brows furrowing a little as your face melted into a small frown without realizing, thinking you misread his earlier signals.

JJ's chest ached at the sight of your frown, and his hand came up to cup your cheek, his thumb gently grazing your skin. He gazed at you for a moment, his eyes soft, his voice even softer as he spoke.

"Stop frowning like that..."

One of your hands came up to cover your mouth, "sorry.." you apologized again, your eyes darting around the room for a little. 'God now it was all awkward and he'd have to say something out of pity' you thought.

JJ felt a pang in his chest when you covered your mouth. He didn't like that, he didn't want you to be nervous or insecure around him. He wanted you to feel comfortable, safe.

"Hey, hey, look at me..." He said quietly, his hand on your cheek trying to tilt your face to look at him.

You propped your self gently on your elbows, locking eyes with him, "maybe i should go..?" you spoke, the awkward grimace back on your face as you questioned quietly.

JJ's heart dropped at your words. Go? Why would you want to go? No, he didn't want you to go. "No, no, no. You don't have to go." He said quickly, his hand on your cheek moving to tangle in your hair and hold the back of your neck gently.

He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against yours, his body shifting so that he was a little closer to you now.

"I don't want you to go." He murmured, his voice barely above a whisper.

"I didn't mean to ask that.." you murmured, blinking a couple of times as you locked eyes with him, his forehead resting against yours.

JJ's thumb stroked your neck gently, trying to soothe the tension he was feeling rising in your body. "It's okay, you don't have to apologize. I'm glad you asked, I just..."

He trailed off, suddenly feeling shy and sheepish, which was not an emotion JJ Maybank was familiar with at all. He took a deep breath, steadying himself before continuing to speak. "I just want you to be happy, okay? I don't want you to feel like you have to walk on eggshells around me. You can ask anything, say anything, and I won't get mad. I...."

He cut off again, pausing for a moment before forcing the words out.

"I just want you to feel comfortable with me... cause I'm gonna be your boyfriend and all..."

"...You are?" you asked, raising your brows at his words.

JJ rolled his eyes at your disbelief, lifting his head to look at you properly, his arms still wrapped loosely around your waist.

"Did I stutter? Of course I am. Why in the world would I not want to be your boyfriend?" He asked it more rhetorically, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

—♡‧

A/N: When is it my turn, i say as i fall to my knees, when is it my turn to have a blonde munch surfer thank me by giving me head? i enjoyed writing this one though. But here's your valentines gift for being such sweeties to me, hope i did good. And if you find any mistakes or something its like 4 am atm, just don't mind them okay? I wanted to post this as early as possible and so I'm kinda sleepy. Don't forget to comment or leave asks and join the taglist, i love you all, happy valentines!💕

Tag-list*:･ﾟ✧ @cali-888, @bee-43, @jjscoquette, @melsbels-zip, @stanseventeen @imsiriuslyreal

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[ilovetoxicfictionalmen]

Cillian Characters on Valentine's Day

Little blurbs for my favourites on v day. 18+ only.

Thomas Shelby.|

You'd actually forgotten what day it was. He had a meeting at the crack of dawn, you always knew better than to give a snarky comment on his business affairs. Even raising your brows at a professional matter could make him act wilfully. You were dozy as he brushed his lips against yours whilst he murmured sweet nothings before departing your bedroom.

In the middle of the day, he called you from his office to check up on you. As you wandered in a small circles by the telephone whilst conversing on his day, you were caught off guard as he told you how much he loved you. Blushing like a schoolgirl, you reciprocated it back and he assured you that he'd be home for dinner, not forgetting to mention how badly he wanted to see you.

Frances had to remind you what day it was when you wondered why the dining room was being set up so lavishly. Your heart fluttered and core clenched at the ideas of how your night would unfold, just you and Tommy. Slipping into his favourite dress right before he was expected to return, you heard his car engine roar fiercely and tires crunch over the gravel.

His cold demeanour vanished as he saw you appear on the staircase, in complete awe of you in all of that emerald green. After sliding off his coat, he held his arms wide, polished shoes dragging over the floorboards.

"Come here my love, let me get a good look at you" he ordered kindly.

You're cocooned in his arms, his lips nipping at yours as he inhaled your scent.

"Happy valentine's day, my darling" he whispered before giving you a deep, long sensual kiss.

You hardly took a bite out of your entree when Tommy lifted you onto the table and let his true hunger be satisfied. Making sure that the whole house could hear how deeply in love you were with one another. His cock pounded into you with his teeth dug deep into the tender skin of your neck. Your needy hips rocked on his throbbing member as your legs trapped his waist, keeping him inside of you.

The main course was ice cold by the time you with both ready for it.

Jonathan Crane.|

Romance was never Jonathan's forte. His methods of intimacy were unique, often viewed as unnatural by others. It was always you that gave the sweet conventional gestures, that always left a darker shade on his cheeks. But Jonathan was mysterious and knew how to catch you off guard.

You arrived to work, a small bouquet of white roses on your desk. Accompanied by a note that said, For My Seraphina.

Derived from seraphim (the high angels), the pet name he gave you reflects on how rare, beautiful and almost unattainable your presence is in his life. The angel that reminded him that there is still light in the darkness.

He enjoyed simple tokens of appreciation, often expressed by words. Not to mention, those simple gestures were already testing his emotion distance and lack of tenderness in his dark heart. The last thing Jonathan wanted to do was be seen as weak. Even though he was always vulnerable and raw with you in private.

When you saw him that evening, he acted as if it was a normal day. Because to him, it essentially was, he found the idea of dedicating a day for romance to be stupid.

But it was all shown in his kiss with how much he did care about your affections. By how he gazed into your eyes for a moment longer, the way his cold lips searched for your warmth.

The gentle, calculated speed he used to drive his cock into your dripping warmth. Ensuring that you screamed in pure pleasure around him. That your legs trembled like leafs in the wind and eyesight blurred.

Afterwards, he ate your sweet juices up for hours, keeping you squirming and begging for mercy with the dangerous tool called his tongue. When it was all over, his hands kept you body closer to his, desperate to you connected as one while he whispered how much you meant to him in your sleepy state.

Jackson Rippner.|

Unfortunately despite with how obsessed and possessive Jackson was of you, work still came first. He was away on another business trip, the special day falling right in middle of it. But he still found a way to make it up to you.

You woke up to a delivery man holding the largest bouquet of glitter red roses you'd ever seen. Your cheeks turned the shade of the flowers as you read the elegant note.

I know I'm not there, but you know that I'll make it up to you. When I get back, you'll forget what day this holiday falls on - J

Right as the door clicked shut, your phone went off. There was no need to read the caller ID, his timing was always a chilling coincidence. "Happy valentine's day, baby girl" he purred over the phone.

He always had you looking out the windows, somehow his presence just always felt near, as if he was breathing down your back. But those gut feeling were always full of adrenaline and excitement, which always dripped down out of your core.

"I booked you a spa day at your favourite spot. All inclusive for you, just think of me during the facial, okay?" he teased playfully.

Coming home refreshed and rejuvenated from your elegant pampering, you were shocked to see the bedroom ceiling filled with red balloons. The king sized bed covered in red rose petals, he always knew how they were your favourite. But on top of that was a series of perfectly wrapped gifts full of lavish taste and expensive materials.

A part of you hoped he was home, but you had to hold onto some sense of realism. Later that night, Jackson called you. Quickly it led on to explicit phone sex, your fingers deep in your tunnel as you imagined it to be his cock. He wanted you to tell him exactly what you wanted him to do to you. Jackson promised you that he'd fill those desires as soon as he got home.

You whined in a high pitch, Jackson came hard, wishing that he could see your pathetic expressions underneath him. He stayed on the phone until you drifted off into a blissful slumber.

When Jackson did return a couple of weeks later, he fulfilled his promise of making you forget what day Valentine's day fell on. All while you wore the new set of lingerie he brought for you.

Lenny Miller.|

Sleeping with your boss always felt like strictly business. It was just sex to pass the time and ease the stress. Or as you thought it was. The promise of having dinner together always felt empty on his behalf. It was like he was only saying it to continue to get in your pants.

So when he did take you out for dinner, it just felt like a coincidence that it was on Valentine's Day. It was a top notch restaurant all waiters dressed like penguins. It did make you feel special, you couldn't remember the last time someone put this much effort in for you.

You made out in the elevator, you hand palming at his bulge. Holding your hand as he guided you to the hotel room, your eyes widened as you saw the dimmed candle lit bedroom. His chest pressed against your back, his arms snaked around your front.

"Happy Valentine's Day, princess" he whispered through his wide grin.

He was protective of you. That night showed you how he'd never allow you to get hurt, not under his watch. He'd always make sure he had eyes on you one way or another. Even though you were his agent trained for worst case scenarios, he'd never truly put you in danger. Lenny would rather get caught in the crossfire than send you off to your initable death.

You straddled him instantly, rocking your hips over his. He murmured, his breath scented with the sweet dark rum, his firm hands tangled into your loose hair.

"Come on princess, show me how much you love daddy's cock" he exhaled, pushing his hips up into yours.

You slid down the bed, your knees laid wide apart as you pressed your mouth to his bulge. Eyes peeled wide as you stared at him waiting for the order. He had a deadly smirk on his lips as he relaxed into the bed, and urged you to continue on. In a slow teasing yet praising manner, your soft hands admired his hard length. A grunt rumbled through his ribcage as you kissed the head of his member, allowing your slithering tongue to swirl around him.

“Enough teasing, remind me how I like it” he moaned.

On command, your mouth sunk down his size, his hands tangled into your hair once more as he guided your pace. There was no shame in his moans as you brought him towards the edge of pleasure.

Straddling him once more, you pulled your panties to the side. Sinking down on him, Lenny pulled his upper body up as he wrapped his arms around you.

“Just like that princess, so fucking perfect for me” he grunted as he pounded his desperate cock into you.

Emmett.|

He wasn't pleased by it. Thought it was just a stupid way for businesses to take money from you. He'd often ask why you needed a specific day so show how much you loved someone when he tried to give you tokens of his appreciation daily. It didn't particularly bother you either, but he could see the twinkle in your eyes that craved for those conventional moments.

After work, he walked in with a bunch of your favourite flowers. It shocked you that he even knew what they were, you'd never explicated said it. You were over the moon as you snatched them from his hands and planted smooches over his shaved jaw. He chuckled, snaking his arms around your waist as he guided you into the kitchen. Your back pressed into the edge of the bench as he passionately made out with you, your hands wrapped around his firm biceps as your hips turned needy.

"What's for dinner darling?" he hummed, his hands slipping under your skirt.

"Whatever you want" you gasped as his fingers rubbed over your panties.

"Only want to enjoy a beer with your mouth around my dick" he growled.

"I can do that" you purred, followed by a gasp as his thick digits pushed into your aching core.

Later that night, Emmett relaxed his tired body on the couch, the baseball game on the television and a cold beer all bubbled up in his hand. All while you kneeled between his legs, his jeans to his ankles and thick cock deep down your throat.

Neil Lewis.|

Cheap chocolates accompanied by an annoyingly bright bouquet of random flowers were shoved in your face as you opened the door. He wore his best suit at the restaurant that he had to beg reservations for (he left it last minute typically).

Glasses of red wine were shared over Neil expressing his insights on his favourite films. Even though he always repeated the same story over and over, you adored how passionate he was about cinema and how happy it made him. His hand rested on your knee, tracing circles out of comfort as he admired your beauty.

Afterwards, you both went back to his to watch one of his favourite films. You snuggled up on the couch, the microwave bag of popcorn on your lap as the movie played. Another bottle of cheap wine was opened, but you both just swigged it instead of having to wash the glasses in the morning. His mind was invested in the film that he'd already seen for the hundredth time. But his hand still stayed on your knee as you rested your head against his chest.

It wasn't until the credits rolled that Neil showed just how badly he adored you. His lips suckled against yours, while his hands explored your divine body. Dropping his knees onto the carpet, he pulled your hips closer to his lowering mouth and slipped your shorts and panties off in one go.

"So fucking pretty babe" he grumbled as he admired your glistering cunt.

You hummed slowly, relaxing your body into the soft cushioning as he buried his mouth and nose into your pussy. Your fingers twirled through his long locks as he encouraged you to show him how badly you were enjoying this. Screaming his name, your hips thrusted against his face, your clit being sucked into his mouth and his fingers buried deep in your velvet walls.

Coming down from your orgasm, Neil pressed his cheek into your sweating inner thigh, looking up at you in admiration through the moonlight. You murmured his name, he crawled up your sensitive body and laid you comfortably on the couch as he freed his throbbing length desperate to be squeezed by your sweet tunnel.

William Killick.|

The solider was a romantic, his blood crafted of tenderness, fondness and passion. You're the light of his life, the reason he kept up his fight. Even though his mind and soul was broken from the war, he still loved you so deeply. William would do anything and everything to protect you. So of course he'd take up the special day to show you how much you meant to him.

In quiet moments, I've learnt to wait To love you from a distance, through it feels too late The world spins on, and so must we But with every step I take, it's you I see I've said little, my heart still unspoken But for you, it's a promise that won't be broken On this day, we don't need much to know That where you are, is where I'll go - Your William

You read the sweet poem over and over again, your eyes gazing over to the fresh handpicked bunch of flowers in-between each read. He slept peacefully on the couch, the warm sun shining over him through the window.

He wasn't particularly keen on going into town much these days. The loud shouts and banging noises could trigger his nerves and tormented memories. Staying cooped up in your cottage for better for him for the time being. It helped him ease his mind being focused on taking care of you.

With dinner slowly cooking in the large pot, you tiptoed over to your husband. His eyes peaked open, somehow he could always sense your presence. Smiling down gently to him, he opened his arms and gestured for you to come to him.

Accepting his silent proposal, you straddled his hips and lowered your chest against his. Silently, your tongued danced with one another, his hands ran up and down, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind his fingertips. Your eyes gazed into one another for what felt like hours, admiring everything about each other. Wondering where you'd be if you'd never met.

His hand rubbed over your growing stomach, he smiled gently at how much your child grew each day.

Raymond Leon.|

Don't expect anything. Seriously, don't. He's the most emotionally unavailable, narcissistic person you know. However you managed to get into this dreadful combination of a no label, friends with benefits (were you even really friends?), situationship with him was a dagger in the back.

Being well aware of what day it was, he'd make sure to see you. Just to make you wonder if he had anything special planned for you. But he'd keep up the exact same routine you've always had.

Even though you desperately wanted to organise anything to make the day a little bit more special, your doubts held you back in fear of his neglect or rejection. Offering to do the position you were never too keen on was the only way you could show how much he truly meant to you.

All you got that night was the aftercare of gentle kisses as he held your naked, sweating body close to his after your love-making.

Robert Fischer.|

It was prepared weeks in advance. He wanted to make sure that everything was perfect. All to decorate his love for you. Robert always got insecure that his demanding job and famous reputation would one day drive you away. It was common to give you huge gestures of his love and appreciation for you. So of course he had to go all out on today. He reserved the best table at your favourite restaurant and had all of your extravagant gifts wrapped up and hidden.

It felt like the world was ending when he woke up with a high fever, stinging eyes and a blocked up throat and nose. You tended for him the moment you woke up, despite his firm demands that he was fine. Ordering him to stay in bed, you took care of him, cancelling all of your plans for the day. Robert laid in bed half asleep, his eyes drowsy as he watched you wipe his sweating body with a damp towel.

Right before your supposed dinner, he was out of bed, downing a variety of medicines to ease his sickness. Completely shocked at his rebellion, you scolded him, but he denied his horrible state. Still determined to give you the night you deserved. When he insisted he was well enough to go out for dinner, you pushed him back into bed.

The doubts and worries weighed heavy on him, he knew how excited you were for this night. But to his surprise, you placed a hot cup of tea on his bedside table and crawled into bed, wrapping your body around his, not a care in the world if you got sick too.

For the rest of the night, you ordered in Chinese take out and watched your favourite movies until the late hours, he was in and out of it, you always smiled as he looked up to you. He grumbled out how badly he loved you. He nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, the smell of vapo rub strong on his scent. His arms and legs wrapped around your body like serpents as he murmured your name in his heavy sleep.

[saturnbeknownst]

an aventurine analysis—(most of) the references in his character.

i thought i'd compile this information on here in case someone else might be interested in this!! enjoy!! if i missed anything, do let me know in the comments. ⁠♡♡

aventurine's light cone is called "inherently unjust destiny". an "inherently unjust destiny" refers to a situation or outcome that is fundamentally unfair or biased from the start. it implies that the factors determining one's fate are intrinsically unequal, leading to inevitable injustice. this phrase is often used in discussions about societal structures, where certain groups might face systemic disadvantages that predetermine their outcomes, regardless of their actions or efforts.

the name kakavasha means the cry of a young crow in sanskrit.

kakavasha was born on the kakava festival, held by romani people on may 5-6.

the name aventurine is based off the aventurine stone, which represents opportunity and luck.

aventurine's banner is called gilded imprisonment, which refers to a situation where an individual is trapped in a seemingly comfortable or privileged environment, but in reality, their freedom and autonomy are restricted. this term is often used to describe scenarios where the outward appearance of luxury or advantage masks the underlying lack of true liberty or choice. the concept can be applied to various contexts, such as relationships, employment, or societal roles, where the benefits or status conferred upon an individual come at the cost of their freedom or well-being.

aventurine's quest is called “all the sad tales,” which could refer to “All the sad Young Men” by F. Scott Fitzgerald—a collection of short stories. i've summarized all of them below:

The Rich Boy an upper-class man, Anson Hunter, is emotionally distant and incapable of deep love. despite several relationships, including a significant one with Paula Legendre, his arrogance and fear of commitment leave him alone and regretful. Winter Dreams Dexter Green, a working-class young man, falls for the beautiful but fickle Judy Jones. he builds a successful life in pursuit of her, only to realize later that she has married and lost her charm. the story reflects themes of unattainable dreams and disillusionment. The Baby Party John and Edith Andros take their daughter to a children’s party, where a minor conflict between kids escalates into a physical fight between their fathers. the story highlights adult immaturity and the fragility of pride. Absolution a young boy named Rudolph Miller struggles with guilt and strict religious expectations. after confessing a minor sin, he receives harsh punishment from his father, leading him to question morality. the story serves as a thematic prelude to The Great Gatsby. Rags Martin-Jones and the Prince of Wales a wealthy woman, Rags, is pursued by a mysterious and seemingly noble man, who turns out to be an imposter. the story critiques social pretensions and the illusions of high society.

The Adjuster a woman named Luella, who believes she deserves happiness without effort, is advised by a psychiatrist to embrace life’s hardships. the story explores self-delusion and personal growth. Hot and Cold Blood two men reflect on a failed business venture and how their differing personalities—one cold and calculating, the other passionate—led to their downfall. the story examines human nature and success.

The Sensible Thing George O’Kelly, an ambitious but struggling man, is rejected by his love, Jonquil, due to financial instability. after achieving success, he returns to her, only to find their love has faded. the story mirrors themes of lost innocence and changing emotions.

Gretchen’s Forty Winks a husband, Roger Halsey, feels neglected when his wife, Gretchen, prioritizes her beauty sleep. His jealousy and insecurity lead to comedic misunderstandings, revealing the absurdity of marital tensions.

in the cn dub, aventurine's quest is titled “dance in the slaughterhouse,” which refers to “Dance in the Slaughterhouse,” a novel by Ed McBain. [spoilers ahead] in this novel, detectives from the 87th Precinct investigate a snuff film, uncovering a dark network of violence and sexual exploitation. as they track the killers, they face corruption and danger, leading to a tense and gritty conclusion.

when we switch to aventurine's pov in the penacony quest, it's is called danse macabre. the "danse macabre," also known as the "dance of death," is an artistic and literary motif that emerged in the late Middle Ages. it depicts the universality of death, illustrating the idea that death comes for everyone, regardless of their social status or position in life. the motif typically features skeletons or personifications of death leading people from all walks of life—such as kings, popes, peasants, and children—in a dance toward their graves. the danse macabre serves as a reminder of the inevitability of death and the transient nature of earthly life. it was often portrayed in murals, prints, literature, and music. one of the most famous representations is the fresco in the Cemetery of the Holy Innocents in Paris, created around the early 15th century. this theme became particularly popular in times of plague and social upheaval, reflecting the widespread presence of death and the shared human experience of mortality.

— on a similar note, when we switch to aventurine's pov, we see a question right under danse macabre. the translation is “Quo Fata Ferunt?” which literally means, “Whither the Fates Carry (Us)?” the motto appears on Gibraltar’s coat of arms, granted by Spain’s Catholic Monarchs in 1502, before the British took control of the territory in 1704.

eidolons:

eidolon one; prisoner's dilemma: it is a game that demonstrates why two people might not cooperate, even if it's in their best interest. in the game, two players are arrested and interrogated separately. each has two choices: to cooperate with their partner by staying silent or to betray their partner by confessing. the outcomes are:

if both stay silent, they get a light sentence.

if one betrays and the other stays silent, the betrayer goes free and the silent one gets a heavy sentence.

if both betray, they both get moderate sentences.

the dilemma arises because while mutual cooperation yields a better overall outcome, individual incentives lead both to betray, resulting in a worse outcome for both.

eidolon two; bounded rationality: it is a card game that simulates the decision-making process under constraints. in this game, players must make choices based on limited information, time, and cognitive resources. the aim is to replicate real-world scenarios where individuals cannot consider all possible options or outcomes. the game involves making trade-offs and prioritizing certain actions, reflecting the concept that people use "bounded" rationality rather than perfect rationality when making decisions.

eidolon three; droprate maxing: droprate maxing is a strategy used in games, particularly in those involving loot or collectible items, where players aim to maximize their chances of obtaining rare items. this involves optimizing various factors that affect drop rates, such as choosing the best locations to farm, using specific equipment or bonuses that increase drop chances, and repeating actions that yield the best rewards. the goal is to make the most efficient use of time and resources to get the desired items as quickly as possible.

eidolon four; unexpected hanging paradox: it is a logic puzzle involving a surprise event. for example:

a judge tells a condemned prisoner that they will be hanged at noon on one weekday (monday to friday), but the hanging will be a surprise. the prisoner won't know the day until the morning of the hanging. the prisoner reasons:

- if the hanging is on friday, they would know by thursday night, so it can't be friday.

- if it's thursday, they would know by wednesday night, since friday is ruled out, so it can't be thursday.

- by this logic, they rule out each day, concluding the hanging can't happen at all.

despite this reasoning, the prisoner is hanged on a day they don't expect, making the hanging both surprising and logical.

the paradox arises because the prisoner's logical deduction leads to a conclusion that contradicts the judge's initial statement.

eidolon five; ambiguity aversion: it is when people prefer known risks over unknown risks. in simple terms, if given a choice between a bet where they know the exact odds of winning and a bet where the odds are unclear, most people choose the one with known odds, even if both bets might have the same potential payoff. this happens because people feel more comfortable and secure when they know what to expect.

eidolon six; the stag hunt game: it is a game that illustrates a situation where cooperation and trust between individuals lead to better outcomes, but there's a risk involved. for example:

two hunters can either hunt a stag (deer) together or hunt rabbits alone.

hunting a stag requires both hunters to cooperate; if they succeed, they both get a large reward.

hunting rabbits can be done alone, and each hunter gets a smaller, but guaranteed reward.

if one hunter goes for the stag and the other hunts rabbits, the stag hunter gets nothing, while the rabbit hunter gets a small reward.

the game shows the dilemma between choosing a safe, smaller reward (hunting rabbits) or risking cooperation for a larger reward (hunting a stag). it highlights the importance of trust and cooperation in achieving the best outcomes.

achievements related to aventurine:

when we witness kakavasha's story, we get the achievement "Sibyl, what do you want?" the phrase "Sibyl, what do you want?" originates from T.S. Eliot's poem "The Waste Land," specifically in the epigraph at the beginning. the full epigraph, translated from Latin, is:

"For I myself saw with my own eyes the Sibyl at Cumae hanging in a jar, and when the boys said to her, 'Sibyl, what do you want?' she replied, 'I want to die.'"

this passage references the Sibyl of Cumae, a prophetic figure in Roman mythology who was granted immortality by the god Apollo but not eternal youth. as a result, she grew older and more withered over time, longing for death as a release from her endless, decrepit existence.

the epigraph serves to set the tone for "The Waste Land," a poem that explores themes of decay, disillusionment, and the search for meaning in a fragmented, modern world. the Sibyl's desire for death reflects a sense of despair and futility, which resonates with the broader themes of the poem.

how is this related to aventurine? well, for one, kakavasha's life revolves around death. it would surprise nobody if all he knew at this point would be death. he has been granted a life that could be described as a 'dream' by many, but for him, quite like the Sibyl of Cumae, it could only be a curse. his loss of innocence is also expressed in this line.

upon defeating aventurine's boss, we get the achievement "she replied, ‘i want to die,’" which is a continuation of the previous achievement ("sibyl, what do you want?"), and the sibyl's response, and in this case, also aventurine's.

combat abilities/traces:

(technique) the red and the black: “The Red and The Black” is a novel by Stendhal. [the paragraph summarizes the red and the black, so spoiler warning.] it follows Julien Sorel, a poor but ambitious young man in 19th-century France. he becomes a tutor and has an affair with Madame de Rênal, which forces him to flee to a seminary. later, he gains favor with the aristocratic Marquis de la Mole and begins a passionate affair with the marquis’s daughter, Mathilde. when his past is exposed, he attempts to kill Madame de Rênal, is arrested, and sentenced to death. in prison, he rejects his past ambitions and accepts his fate. Mathilde mourns him, while Madame de Rênal dies of grief.

— peaceful calm: refers to a state of deep tranquility and serenity, where there is an absence of stress, agitation, or disturbance. It's a feeling of inner stillness and relaxation, where both the mind and body are at ease. In this state, one may feel grounded, clear-headed, and free from worry or tension.

— still water runs deep: the latin "still waters run deep" is a proverb with latin origins that suggests that a calm and placid exterior often conceals deep thoughts, emotions, or complexities beneath the surface. it implies that individuals who appear quiet or reserved may possess significant depth, wisdom, or intensity that is not immediately apparent.

— pouring rain: i am still a bit confused about this, but there are two possibilities. it could refer to “In Red Earth and Pouring Rain” by Vikram Chandra, a wounded monkey avoids death by telling an epic tale. His story follows Sanjay, a poet in colonial India, as he navigates love, war, and rebellion. Meanwhile, modern-day characters in California explore identity and belonging.

the other possibility is that it refers to the rain that fell on Sigonia-IV on aventurine's birthday.

(thank you @roxirinart for pointing out this possibility!!) for the 'pouring rain' reference, if it's not referring to anything deeper, it could refer to the act of 'making it rain'—a phrase that means throwing out cash in the air, usually at strip clubs, but it's sort of a slang nowadays for indulgently spending large amounts of money in a lavish or extravagant way, which fits the way his skill is a slot machine hitting the jackpot and how he 'makes it rain' in his ult as well. the pouring part could simply be to emphasize how much money it is (instead of 'drizzling' rain it's 'pouring' rain, which just means it is constantly raining, so a lot of money), or could be a reference to 'when it rains, it pours'—when one bad thing happens, other bad things tend to follow/come with it—which certainly fits how aventurine went through a massacre (in the rain) and proceeded to live a whole life of horrifying 'misfortunes' afterwards.

(shield) fortified wager: a "fortified wager" generally refers to a bet or gamble that has been strengthened or supported in some way. the term isn't widely used, but in this context, 'fortified' suggests that the wager has been enhanced or protected—perhaps through additional safeguards, resources, or strategies. for instance, in gambling or sports betting, a "fortified wager" could mean a bet that has been bolstered by better odds, insider knowledge, or some form of assurance, making it a stronger or less risky bet than it would have been otherwise. it might also involve combining bets or using betting strategies that minimize risk.

blind bet: it refers to a forced bet in poker (and some other card games) that players must place before they see their cards. it’s typically used to ensure there’s money in the pot right from the start of a hand. there are usually two types of blinds in poker:

small blind: a smaller bet placed by the player to the immediate left of the dealer.

big blind: a larger bet placed by the player two seats to the left of the dealer.

these blinds rotate around the table, ensuring everyone contributes over time. the players who place the blind bets are at a slight disadvantage since they must bet without seeing their cards first, thus the term 'blind.'

leverage: it is the ability to influence situations or people so that you can control what happens.

hot hand: it is a phenomenon, previously considered a cognitive social bias, that a person who experiences a successful outcome has a greater chance of success in further attempts.

bingo: it is a game of chance using cards on which there is a grid of numbers, a row of which constitute a win when they have been chosen at random. bingo is one of the most popular forms of low-priced gambling in the world.

[ckret2]

Do you have any theories about the "Better World"? Or headcanons about this parallel universe?

I've seen some people theorize that it's a sham somehow—that actually Ford turned into a villain or he's secretly being possessed by Bill or he died and Fiddleford didn't want to say so or it was all an illusion or something like that.

I don't think that's the case. I think it'd undermine the narrative importance of the Better World if it weren't real.

For it to work in the story, Ford has to really, actually see his own ideal perfect alternate life—the life where he got everything he (thought he) wanted, where he got to benefit from all of Bill's lessons and still kick Bill out when he became inconvenient, where Stan helped out on Ford's own terms and never hindered him again, where Fiddleford remained his assistant with his sanity intact, where Ford got the fame, the money, the research institution...

Ford has to see that—and still end his narrative arc by proudly showing off a picture with the Mystery Shack family and saying that that's what his happiness looks like.

If the Better World is somehow fake, then it means Ford didn't really decide he's happiest with family rather than with "success", because he never actually got to see what his life could have been like if he'd succeeded. If the lesson is "you fool! the kind of success you wanted was never possible in the first place!" then he didn't choose between family and fame (an important, emotionally poignant choice), he only chose between family and fruitlessly chasing a fame he never could have achieved (which is a much easier, obvious choice. I'm not deeply touched that a man chose to let go of his ambitions for the sake of his family if the narrative tells me his ambitions were unattainable in the first place).

So I think the Better World is exactly what Journal 3 says it is.

I only have one headcanon about the Better World that's outside what we see in canon:

While the "meeting your duplicate will destroy you" thing may or may not be true (it wasn't true in Dimension MAB-3L, but different physics might be at work), the real reason Fidds didn't at least try to set up a video call or something between the Stanfords is because Better World Ford is can-barely-get-out-of-bed depressed.

The Better World is where Ford achieved everything he thinks he wants; and I think, if he got what he thought he wanted, he would have learned that no amount of world-changing discoveries, academic success, public praise, award ceremonies, or glowing speeches made on his behalf would ever make him feel like he's made it—and so he kept going and kept going and went higher and higher until he reached as high as he could possibly reach and discovered there's nowhere further for him to go and still he isn't content with his life.

And he'll never feel like he's made it until he feels like he's loved and accepted—unconditionally, with or without the scientific achievements.

And he'll never feel unconditionally loved in a world where he never sees his closest family again.

(I think this is similar to what happened to Bill. He's achieved what seems to be some sort of godhood and he's not happy. He runs a dimension and he's not happy. He has a gang of zealous followers and he's not happy. He finally invades Earth and takes over Gravity Falls and he's not happy—we never see him partying with his Henchmaniacs. And if we'd seen Bill's own Better World—if he'd taken over the universe—he still wouldn't have been happy. And he wouldn't have understood why. What MORE can he do?)

But Worse World Ford can't see the Better World as a cautionary tale. This isn't his Scrooge-with-the-Ghost-of-Christmas-Future moment. He has to see only everything he ever wanted—he has to see that he WON, and yes, he REALLY DID win, he really did accomplish ALL THOSE AMAZING THINGS—and then he has to realize for himself that he wants his family more. He made his choice out of love for his family, not out of fear of the alternative.

[nvxzaa]

── .✦ Met Gala

Masterlist

Pairing : Christopher Bahng x reader

Word : 3.6k

Genre : fluff ? I think…

Warning : none

Needed You.

Everyone adored them. Chan and Yn were the perfect dream couple. Two idols at the peak of their careers, from different bands but united by an undeniable chemistry. For five years, they had embodied the love story that everyone thought was unshakeable. Every public appearance, every stolen interaction between performances, every glance exchanged on stage only reinforced the idea that they were made for each other.

So when their separation was confirmed, nobody believed it at first. Fans were looking for signs, explanations, clues that might have justified such a split. But there were none. No scandal, no poignant declaration, just a deafening silence. They parted without a word, leaving behind a mystery that no one could solve.

And now, a year later, they were meeting again at the Met Gala.

Chan had seen her as soon as she entered the room. He would have liked to say it was by chance, that his gaze had landed on her without intention, but that would be a lie. The truth is, he'd been looking for her. Maybe part of him hoped she wouldn't come, that he wouldn't have to face what he still felt, but another part-the part that refused to forget-knew he wanted to see her.

Yn was there, resplendent as ever. Draped in a dress that hugged her figure perfectly, she lit up the room without even trying. She laughed, chatted with other celebrities, posed for photographers, as if nothing had changed. As if she'd never been her own.

Chan, on the other hand, remained frozen. He knew he should look away, pretend, play the game of the perfect ex who's moved on. But he couldn't. Because no matter how much time passed, no matter what reasons had separated them, she was still the one person he'd never been able to stop looking at.

Chan gritted his teeth.

He would have liked to look away, to stop staring at her like an idiot, but he couldn't help it. Yn was there, only a few feet away, and all he could think about was how much he'd missed her.

But it wasn't supposed to be like this. He was supposed to have moved on, just as she had.

Because, yes, she had.

The rumors said she was seeing someone. Not for long-only a few weeks-but enough for it to make the rounds on the networks. He hadn't wanted to believe it at first, convincing himself that it was just noise, a story cooked up by the media. But now that he saw her in front of him, so beautiful, so unattainable, he wondered if it wasn't true.

He didn't know who she was. He hadn't tried to find out, out of pride, out of fear too. Because putting a name to the one who was now taking the place he'd occupied for five years would make it all too real.

Yn laughed at something that had just been said, a laugh he knew too well, a laugh that had once belonged to him. She looked... good. Not just smiling for the cameras, but really good.

And that, perhaps, was what hurt him most.

He took a sip of his drink, trying to mask his confusion. He didn't even know what he was feeling exactly. Jealousy? Regret? Nostalgia? Probably a mixture of all these.

All he knew was that despite the break-up, despite the reasons, despite the time... he wasn't ready to see her belong to someone else.

Discreetly, without attracting attention, she left the hustle and bustle of the gala for a moment's respite. Too many people, too many glances, too many memories. She hadn't planned on running into Chan tonight. She should have known better, of course, but part of her hoped that the past year would make it easier.

She had taken refuge on a private terrace, away from the hubbub and flashbulbs of the photographers. The air was fresher here, lighter. She closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying the calm.

Yn could feel his gaze on her.

She'd felt it as soon as she'd entered the room, long before she even dared to look for him out of the corner of her eye. It was a sensation she knew all too well, that of being under Chan's silent attention, as if, no matter how crowded it got, he'd always find a way to see only her.

A year. A year since they'd seen each other. Not a word, not a message. Not because they hated each other, but because they didn't know how else to do it. Their breakup hadn't been explosive or cruel. Just inevitable.

She wanted to move on, to build something greater than their relationship as it was. Five years together, loving each other between tours, interviews and impossible schedules. Five years of promising each other tomorrows without ever talking about the aftermath. She saw their future, a real future, with commitments, certainties, something concrete.

But he... he wasn't into that kind of delusion.

He loved her, that was undeniable. But he also loved their current balance, this freedom without ties, this idea that love could be enough without having to be defined by official promises. The idea of marriage, of a greater commitment than they already had, didn't interest him.

And Yn couldn't accept that.

So they parted. Not because they didn't love each other anymore, but because they didn't love in the same way.

And yet, tonight, as she finally looked up at him, she immediately understood that nothing had changed. Chan was still there, with that piercing gaze, silently asking her how she was, if she missed him as much as he missed her.

Yn smiled, one of those smiles she'd learned to master over time-the one that hid everything she wasn't saying. Then she looked away, back at her interlocutors, feigning indifference.

But Chan continued to look at her. Because deep down, he knew. No matter the crowd, no matter the weather, he could never see her as a stranger.

Chan couldn't take it anymore.

He'd tried, really tried, to ignore her presence, to pretend she was just another silhouette, a figure from the past who no longer meant anything to him. But it wasn't true. Every laugh she let out, every fluid movement of her dress, every expression on her face brought him back to everything they had once been.

So he finally gave in.

He crossed the room, glass in hand, his stride confident, his attitude controlled. On the outside, he looked relaxed, almost casual, but inside, his heart was beating too fast.

Yn saw him approach before he could speak. She felt his breath long before he uttered a word. But it was his smile that finished her-that smile, the one he'd give her when he teased her gently, when he was proud of her, when he looked at her as if she were the only thing that mattered.

And that look. That damn look. Always the same look.

- Now you're looking at me. Stop looking at me like that.

A little smile. The kind of smile she received every morning before leaving for work.

The kind of smile that brightened her day, the kind that could have built an entire empire.

- Like what? I'm not looking at you.

She finally looks up at him, and the instant their eyes meet, her heart misses a beat. She freezes for a moment before resuming, her voice lower, more fragile.

- You are. And you're watching me.

She pauses, looks away, bites her lip lightly.

- Jae has a plan. And I like him... I really... I really tried to be happy.

Chan's smile fades slightly. Her heart sinks at hearing him talk about another man. A man who isn't him.

She raises her head, and this time her gaze is veiled in barely concealed hardness.

- But I can't... I can't breathe if you keep looking at me like that, Christopher. So just... stop.

He looks at her, impassive, hands still in his pockets. But inside, it's a storm. The woman he loves, the one he's shared everything with, the one he could see himself ending his life with... is asking him to stop loving her.

- You think I want to look at you? You think I wouldn't rather look at someone else?

He takes a step towards her. Then another. Until she could feel his breath on her skin.

At that precise moment, the world around them no longer exists. Cameras, whispers, curious glances... Nothing else matters. Just them.

- I tried, Yn. I really tried to look at someone else. But no one drives me crazy like you do. No one makes it impossible for me to feel normal. No one makes me sick to my stomach at the thought of another man touching you.

She stares at him, unable to speak, unable to move. Her stomach knots at the proximity of this man who was hers for five years.

- Yn, if I could do anything to stop looking at you... But I can't. Because you are the love of my life. I loved you, and this past year has been hell without you.

He's getting closer again. Slowly. This time, he finally takes a hand out of his pocket and places it gently on her cheek. His gaze softens, but the intensity of his love doesn't waver.

- Yn... please...

- Please what, Chan...

He closes his eyes for a moment, rests his forehead against hers and lets out a trembling sigh.

- I need you. I can't live without you. If it's a wedding you want, then fine, I'll do it. If you want anything else, I'll give it to you. But please... I need you in my life. I need you with me. I...

He stops for a moment, opens his eyes, steps back slightly.

- I need you like the air I breathe. And I need you more than my-

He pauses, searching for words, before simply letting go:

- I just need you. I want you. You.

- Chan...

- You own me, Yn. You control me. I belong to you.

She watches him in silence. His words crash against her like waves, hitting directly into her chest.

- I love you. I'm still in love with you. You are the love of my life. I can't breathe without you. I can't sleep without you.

He takes another step. She backs away slightly, but doesn't flee.

- I wait for you. I watch for you. I exist for you.

Silence.

Yn inhales deeply, her heart on the edge of her lips.

And in her eyes, there's a fight. A battle between reason and love. A battle between the past and the future. A fight... between everything she thought she wanted, and everything he represents.

The silence between them was heavy, laden with all the words they'd never said, all the nights spent trying to forget, all the memories that refused to fade.

Yn looked away, as if breaking eye contact would lighten the weight on his chest. But it was an illusion. He was there, too close, too present, and his gaze continued to burn her.

- Chan... you can't do this. Not now.

Her voice was a whisper, a fragile breath lost in the wind of the terrace. But he heard her. And he smiled. A sad, painful smile, the kind of smile that said everything he couldn't express any other way.

- I know.

But he didn't move.

Yn clenched her fists. She would have liked to push him away, to tell him to leave, to make him understand that they were no longer those two inseparable souls who kept searching for each other. But her heart betrayed her reason.

He placed his hand on the edge of the balustrade, right next to hers. Not enough to touch, but enough for her to feel the warmth of his skin, enough to remember.

- Tell me you're happy.

She inhaled sharply.

- Chan...

- Tell me. Look at me and tell me you're okay, that I'm nothing to you anymore, that you don't want me to stay here with you.

He'd lowered his voice, and it was worse. Worse because it was intimate, because it was real, because it brought her back to them.

Yn opened her mouth, searching for words, searching for a believable lie. But nothing came.

Because the truth was, she missed him.

Terribly.

So instead of answering, she turned away, took a step back, gasping for air, trying to regain control of her body, her heart.

- I can't do this, Chan.

- Can't do what?

- Go back.

He moistened his lips, nodding slowly.

- Who's talking about going back?

She frowned, surprised.

- I want to go forward. With you.

Her heart missed a beat.

- It's not that simple.

- It never has been. But we've always found a way.

He gently reached for her hand, hesitating, as if afraid she might push him away.

- Yn... let me try. Just once.

She looked at him, and in his eyes, she saw everything he was willing to give her, everything he was willing to change.

And for the first time in a year, she wondered if she was really ready to let him go.

Yn stared at that outstretched hand in front of her.

It was amazing how much a simple gesture could awaken. So many memories, so many emotions. She saw herself again, years ago, slipping her fingers between his after a concert, in the secret of a deserted corridor. She saw herself waiting for him in hotel rooms, drowning in his arms after months apart, promising him that they'd always find a way, that they were stronger than anything.

But this time...

- Chan... if we do it again...

Her voice broke slightly.

- If we do it again, will you really hold this hand until the end?

He didn't hesitate. Not for a second.

- He would.

A shiver ran through her.

She wanted to believe him. She wanted to believe that this time he wouldn't back down, that he wouldn't be afraid of what she wanted, of what she needed. Because the problem had never been love. It had always been there, burning, absolute. But love wasn't enough. Not for her.

Yn closed her eyes for a moment, trying to quell the storm inside her.

- What if I need more, Chan?

He clenched his jaws, lowering his eyes for a moment before anchoring them in hers again.

- Then you'll have more.

She let out a bitter laugh.

- You say that now.

- No, I'm not. I mean it.

He took a step forward, bridging some of the gap between them.

- I've had a year to figure it out, Yn. A year to tell myself I was fine, that it was better this way, that it was you who wanted something else, not me. But it wasn't. I lied to myself.

He ran a hand through his hair, inhaling deeply before resuming.

- Who I want is you. Not a simpler version, not a half-hearted love, not an in-between where I can pretend everything's okay. I want you. All of you.

She felt her breath catch in her throat.

- If it's a commitment you want... then I'm ready.

Silence fell between them, heavy, hanging on those words she'd never thought she'd hear from him.

She knew this wasn't some random promise. Chan wasn't that kind of man. He didn't say things he didn't mean. But...

- Why now?" she breathed.

He smiled sadly.

- Because losing a year without you was enough to make me realize that I don't want to lose the rest of my life.

An imperceptible tremor ran through her fingers.

And gently, almost unconsciously, she held out her hand.

Their fingers brushed hesitantly, as if rediscovering each other after too long. Then, finally, Chan closed his around hers. Firmly.

- Tell me you don't feel anything," he murmured. And I'll leave.

Yn opened her mouth, ready to speak. Ready to say the words she should, the words that would put an end to this story.

But no sound came out.

Because the truth was, she still felt everything.

And Chan understood this even before she admitted it.

"Bang Chan and Yn: Reconciliation in sight? What really happened at the Met Gala."

Headlines scrolled across screens, notifications piled up on their phones. Videos were already circulating on the networks, capturing those exchanged glances, those gestures that said too much. One clip in particular had gone viral: the one in which Chan held out his hand, she hesitated, then their fingers intertwined.

"A source close to the artists claims that the two shared a private moment after their exchange caught on camera. Did they rekindle the flame?"

Yn sat on the edge of her bed, phone in hand, reading article after article. Her heart was still beating too fast, the weight of the previous day still on her chest. She saw his gaze again, saw the certainty in his eyes, saw his hand in hers.

Yn hadn't thought it through when she'd left the gala with him. Maybe she should have. Maybe she should have thought about the consequences, about what it really meant. But she hadn't had the strength.

They hadn't spoken on the way home, the silence between them laden with everything they didn't yet dare to say.

Then the door to Chan's hotel room had closed behind them.

And they had stopped struggling.

Chan's hands had found their way back to her skin, his mouth had found its way back to hers, and the rest... the rest had come to them as naturally as if no year had passed, as if their breakup had never existed.

It was a night of love, but also a night of silent confession. Every kiss, every touch was a way of saying everything they'd never been able to express in words.

And now, as dawn began to dimly illuminate the room, Yn felt a movement beside her.

Chan.

She slowly opened her eyes and turned her head slightly.

There he was, shirtless, his hair still slightly damp from the shower he'd taken earlier.

He had slipped into bed without a word and nestled against her, his arm wrapped around her waist, his face lost in the hollow of her neck.

Yn felt his warm breath against her skin, the comforting warmth of his body against hers.

She could have said something. She could have asked questions, tried to understand where they stood, what it all meant.

But right now, nothing else mattered but the way he was holding her. As if he'd finally found what he was looking for. As if last night hadn't been a mistake, but an obvious one.

So she closed her eyes and let her hand slide through his hair, savoring this stolen moment before reality caught up with them.

The minutes stretched on, at once too long and infinitely short, as if time had stopped for them alone. Yn didn't want to break the magic of the moment, but she knew that sooner or later she would have to speak. Still, she couldn't help feeling serene, at peace, in his arms.

- Are you feeling well?" whispered Chan, finally breaking the silence, his voice low, like a light breath.

Yn smiled without opening her eyes, letting herself be lulled by the softness of his tone.

- Yes... And you?" she replied softly, her hand brushing his warm skin.

- Better than ever," he said, his tone tinged with a sincerity she hadn't heard in so long.

He lifted his head slightly and looked at her, his eyes shining with an emotion she no longer knew how to name. Perhaps hope. Or simply the desire to believe again.

- Yn, I'm sorry," he said after a moment's silence. For everything... for everything that's happened. I know I've hurt a lot, and I don't want you to think I don't care.

She nodded slowly, her heart warming at his words. The years of doubts and unspoken words seemed to be slipping away with every second.

- I know, Chan. And I've been distant too. I haven't been easy either.

A slight smile lit Chan's face, and he leaned over to kiss her tenderly on the forehead.

- We may have lost time, but we're here now, aren't we? It's time to give it a real go.

Yn snuggled a little closer to him, suddenly feeling lighter.

- A chance, yes," she replied. But this time, we're doing things our own way, slowly. No hurry.

- I promise," he said with a smile, his fingers brushing her cheek. In our own way.

They stood there in soothing silence, their breaths mingling, like a gentle chord, a promise of a new beginning. And in that suspended moment, Yn thought that maybe things would work out in the end. Maybe this time, their story wouldn't end in the shadows of the past.

Notifications continued to pile up on their phones, but they paid them no further attention. What mattered was the present, this shared second. And that was enough.

[galene-gothic]

𝖧𝗈𝗐 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗒 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖿𝗎𝗍𝗎𝗋𝖾 𝗌𝗉𝗈𝗎𝗌𝖾/𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍𝗇𝖾𝗋 𝖻𝖾𝗀𝗂𝗇?

୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ I hope this reading found you in good health, every reblog is appreciated and thank you for everything :) ˖♡ ˎˊ˗ ꒰ 🐇 ꒱

˗ˏˋ༻ʚ♡︎ɞ༺ˎˊ˗             PAID SERVICES

⸼ ۫ ︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 1 ꒱

You might meet in or outside a church, museum or funeral. Probably in colder areas and during winter. Some of you might have studied in convents or just catholic schools. You will meet them when you're going through a spiritual awakening, breakthrough or something along those lines. Due to how focused you are on your own life and making life pleasant, you'll be mysterious and extremely desirable to not only your future spouse but also other people around them. You'll be thirsty for knowledge and working on self improvement. Your energy at that time will be extremely sensual because of how self controlled you are. You might be realising your worth at that time and trying to be as aligned as possible which leads you to being viewed as unattainable. Your mindset will be in a good place too. "If I can't change it, I'll just make something out of it." That's how you'll be thinking. Just focusing on things that you can control and taking good care of yourself. You'll be tapping into your feminine energy. Your intuition will be running really high at this time. You might be doing shadow work at that time.

You'll have gained some kind of wisdom at that time and will be trying to live a balanced life. You'll be dissatisfied with how your life is but you'll choose to focus on things that you can control to build a better life for yourself in the future. Your future spouse on the other hand, will be living quite freely. They'll be advancing in life and also very confident. They'll be really growing as a person in every way possible. They'll be focused on the present and the future and expanding their life. They might have a new goal that they will be working towards at that time. They'll be committed to the person they're working to be. They'll have a 'go big or go home' mindset. They'll pretty much be fearless. I think the both of you would have gone through something really rough and transformative which led you to changing yourself for the better. Their first impression of you will be that you have a brain that you make use of. They'll think that you're not the type to rush into love. They'll think that you're an intelligent person who wants to surround themself with intelligent people. They'll think that you're honest and independent. They'll think that you have high standards.

They'll also think that you're pretty open-minded once you say something that makes them think so, before that, the might've been kinda scared of you. They'll think that you're clever. You'll see them as someone with a lot of potential. When you meet them, I don't think that they'll be as successful as you. You'll think that they prefer committed relationships. You'll assume that they're an outdoorsy person. You'll think that they really value stability in general. Please keep in mind that these are just assumptions because well, it's your first meeting. You'll be able to see that they value money and have a lot of potential to earn money too. You might think that they're kind of stingy. You'll see them as someone who's still growing and can grow to be unrecognisable. Moving onto the first conversation, you'll be initiating it. Your first conversation itself is going to be pretty deep. You'll both talk about forgiveness and acceptance. I just heard 'lack of acceptance is the cause of all suffering'. This conversation is a bit heavy but you'll both be talking as if it's some show 😭. You'll both talk about resilience and finding strength to move forward regardless of what happens.

You'll both likely be in a transition period too. Let's look at how you'll be feeling during your first conversation, you'll be feeling restricted and be very guarded. You'll be feeling insecure of getting judged. Your mind will be making you feel powerless, you'll definitely have something else bothering you for you to be feeling like this. You'll be trying your best not to feel this way though even if you're not aware of it. There will likely be other people around you and people who might know you or people who might know them which will leave them feeling watched. It'll be difficult for them to be fully open because of this and also because it's your first conversation. Don't get me wrong, you'll be trying to stay true to yourself and all but you'll just be feeling uncomfortable and scared because of past experiences and hurts. You'll want someone to save you at that time, even if you won't be aware of it. Them on the other hand, they'll be feeling healed. While you'll be scared everytime you let something out, they'll be feeling passionate about whatever you're speaking about. They'll be feeling free and optimistic. They'll be feeling really peaceful and calm. They'll be able to look at things from your perspective and will be managing emotions very well. They'll be staying true to themself.

They'll be the one to fall in love first, they'll fall in love with you in within a few days, weeks or within two months of you meeting. You'll fall in love with them in a few months or years. They'll fall in love with you because you try to take good care of yourself and try to live a relaxed life. You have something about you that's very relaxed or relaxing. They'll see you as peace loving and caring. You might do some self care activities, even if it's just eating well/drinking enough water. I'm getting that many of you here will be into meditating at that time too. I think that something about you is very submissive and breedable. They'll be able to sense the purity in your intentions and soul. They'll also see you as someone extremely beautiful. They'll respect you and feel respected by you. They'll think that you care about material success and possessions. They'll fall in love with you because you make them have realisations that pretty much change their life for the best. They'll also feel really loved by you and feel like you care about their well-being and it's difficult not to love someone who makes you feel loved.

They'll think that you have an abundant mindset and energy that they'll really look up to. Interacting with you will make them want to live a good life on Earth in any way possible. You'll also always (through your actions) affirm that you're a good person who's worthy of their love and that's definitely beautiful. They'll love the way you express yourself. The fact that they love you will also be a sudden realisation to them. They'll fall in love with you in an instant because of something you say or do. They'll feel so grateful to be able to meet you, they'll feel lighter, at home and extremely emotionally attuned around you. The connection you share will feel very familiar right from the start. I'm getting that whenever they'll see you (before they realise that they're in love with you), they'll feel really confused, excited and even annoyed when they see you. One day, they'll be really tired (physically, mentally or emotionally). They'll be pretty much drained if I'm honest. Even when they first met you, they might have been in a similar energy but they didn't express it but as you get to know them, this part of them will start showing.

You'll say something that'll make them realise that healing is necessary before they step into anything. They might start acting annoyed whenever they see you at some point because they don't understand how they feel towards you but you'll be patient with them. Your kindness is exactly what they'll need at that point of time. You'll help them realise that their past wounds are preventing relationship growth. Even though they'll be tired, you'll be able to help them tap into the strength and courage to continue going. They'll be so grateful to you. They'll feel extremely emotional around you and maybe even sleepy. Your balanced approach to things will help them a lot and the more they get to know you, the more breathless they'll get due to how great of a person you. They'll be like "how is [___] even real?" You'll fall in love with them because they're intelligent and even if they might not be particularly spiritual, they hold a lot of wisdom. They'll be a balanced person with a duality. You'll find them to be really efficient which helps you become efficient too. They'll also probably try to help you without you having to ask them.

They're also extremely observant and make you feel seen, heard, felt and special. There'll be something about them that you'll not be able to put a finger on, something that makes them so intriguing, so mysterious. You'll feel like they understand you because they have the understanding that everyone has darker qualities but that doesn't mean they don't have a single light quality. You'll feel like they can feel your feelings including your pain, etc. You'll feel understood on a level that you didn't consider possible. They'll bring out sides of you that you weren't aware existed and vice versa. You might actually dream about them before you meet them. You might not see their face but you'll feel their energy and when you first meet them, they might feel really familiar to you. You'll realise that you're in love with them when they help you during some hardship, could be financial. You'll be worried and trying to isolate yourself but they'll not give up on you. You'll be able to feel that they care about you and that they're worried about your well-being. You'll just stare at them for a while when you realise that you're in love with them.

You'll feel like the universe has given up on you, life doesn't work in your favour but they'll be there to remind you that they're there and things will eventually pass. You'll be feeling really lonely and unsupported by others. You might have loss friends, family or just broken up too. For a few of you, you will be sick but they'll take care of you. You'll be lacking faith and hope in yourself and your life but they'll have faith in you and try to remind you to have faith. They'll help you look at your past and resolve unhealed issues in order to move forward in the future. I just got the imagery of someone guiding a kid and helping them walk, that's how you'll feel with them. They'll teach you how to walk again (metaphorically). They'll be the one to confess, they'll probably confess either in September or October or one year after they've realised their feelings. They'll be honest and tell their feelings out loud to you. They might actually send you a text, email, letter, voicemail or voice call. I'm getting that face to face confession might be difficult, it's possible for many of you though. They'll have taken a lot of advice from others about it.

The confession will likely be followed by a suggestion to get married. It'll just be a suggestion though 💀. They will propose to you soon, probably October or November. They'll be very grand this time, very confident and kinda childlike. They'll be extremely enthusiastic and show you a more childlike, fun, unrestricted and innocent side. They'll kinda be taking vows while proposing to you. "I promise to always be there for you in the coldest seasons and the unbearably hot ones, I promise to take care of you when you're sick and hurt." You might get married or atleast engaged within thirty days of the confession/proposal.

⸼ ۫ ︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 2 ꒱

You'll not be alone when you meet them and you'll likely meet them in a place that gives off a healing vibe. Might be near the nature too. I'm not sure why but I'm getting that you might meet them at an institute, community or camp that's very healing, however, people might go there for several different reasons. Like, for example, a church where some people go to pray because they actually believe in Jesus, some people who go there to build a community, etc. or a school that's open on the weekends (for students) who can go there to study, read, play basketball, play volleyball or just chill. This place might be located in a quieter place in the town, city or whatever. Even though this place will be healing and quieter, the things that you'll be doing will be fast paced and high energy, however that's still going to be healing for you guys. There's a sense of everything being fated. You'll both be there for some spiritual progress. You guys might be playing a game or something (I heard 'bet' and 'gamble'). Could be board games too, for some reason I'm getting that you might not participate but will be watching.

Could be them too but for 80% of you, it'll be you. Well, either way you'll be socializing regardless of whether you're an active participant in a game or not. They'll be extremely focused and disciplined when you'll meet them. They'll have recently removed themself from fear of their mind and past. They might have taken advice from some woman which led them to the energy that they'll be in, the woman might be older than them (can range from anywhere 1-30 years). Their mind will be working well though, strategic, rational, disciplined, clear, quick, etc. They'll be at a point where you cannot easily fool them. They'll also not be looking for approval anymore. They'll be releasing the past and cutting people off. They'll realise that they require and deserve people who are smart and have similar values around them. They might have a goal or multiple goals that they'll be very focused on at that time. You on the other hand, you'll be confident and exploring life. I think you're the pile who has a zest for experiences, you love gaining experiences and learning lessons regardless of how traumatizing they might be at times.

You'll also be feeling a strong sense of integrity. You might be developing new values or you'll be living up to the values that you'll have. You'll be looking forward to the future. I just heard 'expansion', you'll want to build something for yourself and will probably be working towards it. I just heard that audio 'please lord, make me the biggest star the world has ever known so that I can go far away from this place'. You might be wanting to move somewhere or make a really big dream come true with like eight dollars in your bank account. You'll be experiencing life and will be dreaming big. You'll be wanting all of your dreams to come true. Some of you might be really nostalgic people and don't really let go of people easily and keep on giving chances until you start feeling disgusted by their behaviour. You'll finally have left most people who you don't really vibe with anymore and I'm getting that some of you might be kinda alone but at the same time not really. You might have one or two friends/family members who'll believe in you and give you enough courage to move forward.

You'll be learning how to balance the past, present and the future. You'll be extremely focused on all these three areas especially discipline, working hard and making your dreams come true. You'll not be letting your past attachments and events leave you paralyzed on bed anymore. Even if you won't, you'll still be able to believe in yourself and move forward. I just heard 'hollywood dream' and 'law school'. You guys might be the type who wants results immediately but you'll be learning how to be patient with yourself and life at that point. You'll also be celebrating your past achievements even if they feel like nothing in comparison to the big dreams that you'll be carrying in your little steps. You'll be going with the flow and focusing on what you can control. I don't remember what's in pile 1 because I wrote that quite a while ago but I'm getting a feeling that the two might be connected in some way. For some of you, you'll get married to two people and for some, one will be your perspective, the other will be their perspective or a mix of both the piles or something.

At first sight, i.e. when they haven't had a conversation with you yet, they'll assume that you're someone compassionate and feminine regardless of your gender. They'll assume that you're a mature, emotionally intelligent, calm and forgiving person. They'll think that you're the nurturing type. After they get to have a decent conversation with you they'll be a bit surprised to find out how career oriented you really are. You'll make it really clear that you care about money. Oh. my. god. 'money, money, money' by Abba started playing. They'll think that you have & care about success & money. They'll think that you have strong principles. On talking with you, they'll realise that you're probably high reputation & will think that you're probably well respected. They might actually hear you say something like "don't date broke men/women" or something. They'll think that you wish to have a well off partner. They'll assume that you must be really disciplined. They'll think that you have a lot of resources and are business minded. At the beginning, they will assume that you will probably not have the strongest boundaries.

They will come to realise that they assumed wrong and be able to pick up on your grounded nature when they get to talk to you. Your first impression of them when you haven't had a decent conversation yet will be that they're manipulative and know how to use their tongue to their advantage. You'll just assume that they must be feeling stuck in life, victimize themself & have a negative mindset. Once you have a conversation with them, you'll realise that they're strategic and use their brain to solve problems. You'll think that they're releasing something from their past and aren't the type to rush in love. You'll think that the prefer being around intelligent people and desire mentally stimulating conversations. You'll think that they're reasonable and intelligent. You'll think that they're disciplined. When they first get to see you (when you both haven't talked yet but know that the other exists) they'll not really be feeling an attraction & that's alright. I think it's actually healthy. They'll see you as someone who is a co-worker/just someone who they're sharing the same environment with.

You'll feel untrusting and suspicious of them. You'll think that the intentions that they hold towards everyone seem really unclear. Your first significant conversation with each other will be about dreams, wishes, family, etc. You'll be able to talk about your values and accept each other's differences. The conversation will flow pretty easily. There'll be a playful element present in the conversation. One of you might be like 'family is everything' and the other one might be like 'blood means nothing'. It doesn't have to be that way for all of you though. Whichever one of you doesn't have the best relationship with your family will be very happy for the other one to be able to have a worthy enough family who they can care about so much and vice versa. They might talk about their mother or someone they really admire from their family, likely, an older woman. You'll feel like you belong with each other, kind of an instant connection. You'll be able to make major progress on your inner child healing and connection after this conversation. You'll be feeling much more courageous and positive about the future.

You'll feel a sense of fondness towards them that you don't really understand either. It'll feel like love to you but since it was only the first conversation, you'll choose to tone it down. You'll start holding really warm feelings towards them. They'll feel extremely curious about you. I'm getting a sense of an innocent love. They'll try to be practical because only fools rush in but they won't really be able to help falling in love with you. They'll feel like the conversation you shared had a really intimate and emotional undertone. They'll be imagining stuff about you. They'll start wanting to kind of protect you without even really being aware of it. They'll be the one to fall in love first, they'll fall in love with you because it's kind of an institutional setting which leads you to seeing each other often and you'll prove to be like a teacher to them. They'll want something committed with you. Your beliefs will cause them to think a lot. There'll be mutual respect between the both of you. They'll want to be dependable for you and you'll make them want to depend on you. I'm getting that you'll make them want to build something for themself and for you.

They'll fall in love with you within 3 days - 8 weeks. You'll fall in love with them in around 9 months. Your love language might be physical touch and they'll give you a lot of physical affection which will kind of melt your heart. They'll add excitement into your life. They'll make you feel more attractive and self assured. Your person seems to have a fiery personality atleast with you which might attract a lot of drama into your life which you'll actually enjoy. You'll find them hot, you will probably feel physically hot around them too. They'll come off extremely confident. You'll see them as someone passionate and ambitious. They'll make your inner child extremely happy. The dynamic between the both of you is going to feel extremely pure & kinda innocent to you which will give off an old-school, young love vibe that you'll love. They're going to make you feel adored and you're going to find this love to be so endearing, magical even. You'll fall in love with them when they give you life advice of some sort & realise that you're in love with them when you both are sharing knowing glances with other people around you.

There seems to be a sense of silence when you're with each other even with other people around. They'll probably confess or for some of you, propose after two years. For some of you, they'll confess in a bank or somewhere near it. For others, it's probably going to be at their house/somewhere with greenery present. They might confess at night, they'll talk about their past fears regarding the connection and life in general. They'll just spill the emotions that they feel towards you but cannot contain inside themself anymore or they might say something like "isn't the moon beautiful?" This is so cute lmao, all the best.

⸼ ۫ ︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 3 ꒱

You could meet them at a club, museum, therapy, etc. You'll not be alone when you meet them. You might be with someone who's either a good person but a doormat or someone who's bitchy & constantly victimizing themself. Whoever this is will be very sad though. They could be going through a heartbreak at that time. Since, I'm getting that you won't be alone, it's probably not individual therapy. You'll be in a hardworking energy when you meet them. You'll have goals that you'll be soaring towards. If anyone here has quit education or work, you might actually continue it later. Like, just an example but supposing you dropped out of Yale because you didn't want to study anymore but after a few months or years you might realise that you actually want to complete your education & might join Stanford or Harvard. It'll be an old path with a new environment & you'll probably have new businesses or whatever side hustles you'll be working on. You'll be working towards a better future. They'll be in their mysterious era. I think the both of you will be lonely but have different ways of romanticizing it.

They'll be introspective and balancing different sides of themself. A lot of hidden knowledge will be coming up in their conscious awareness. They will be in a very serene period even if they don't feel like it at that time. I wouldn't be surprised if they are in some sort of an isolation or spiritual retreat. They'll be gaining wisdom & realizing a lot of things. You both seem to be on the right path. At first glance, you'll assume that they probably have a strong circle, something about them screams 'support'. You'll think that they're social and enjoy life. They'll come off as very popular to you. You'll think that they're kind of the 'life of the party' & well liked and loved. You'll think that people want to be around them. You'll think that they are someone who likes to make everyone feel included. They'll seem to be a happy person to you who is & wishes to spread happiness. You'll think that they're an open-hearted person. You'll also assume that they probably have a lot of options in any and all ways possible. Your first impression of them, at first glance (when you haven't had a conversation with them yet) seems to resemble the character image of Kazehaya from the anime 'from me to you'.

You'll assume that they're a loving man/woman. Their gentle character is going to be extremely evident for you to see. I'm getting that some of you probably feel like you don't fit in, don't vibe with people well, might have lost almost everyone in the previous years or something like that so the fact that they'll be including you without making you feel uncomfortable is going to start melting your heart. Being around them is going to feel very healing to you and you'll notice it. Something about them will just hit different. Their first impression of you (when you haven't had a conversation with each other) is that you prefer being alone. They'll think that you enjoy and practice self care. Something about you will make them assume that you like solitude. There are two groups of you here, the first group when you'll meet them, while they'll think that you enjoy solitude and like being alone, they'll think so because you will look or act kind of overwhelmed and the other group will come off that way because they seem much more calm & self reflective. You might look like you can't wait to get back home 💀.

I think that regardless of which of the two groups you'll belong to, at some point you'll finally get comfortable enough to not act on your nerves anymore. They'll notice that you're pretty witty and know how to handle situations & talk your way out of conflict. They'll also realise that you somehow have a lot of information on other people's lives. At this point you'll come off pretty curious and talkative until you will have completely drained your social battery. You'll be the one to start the first decent conversation with them. I'm getting that they will try to talk to you before that but you'll just be a bit overwhelmed & reserved with everything. Your first decent conversation might or might not happen during this meeting. Even though I'm getting that it will be during this meeting for most of you. You'll talk about love, affection, friends having to have similar values otherwise things will go south, etc. They'll be able to pick up on the painful emotions that you'll be dealing with. You'll both be acting kinda defensive and avoidant while still trying to get to know each other properly. You'll both be trying to keep your hearts open instead of being defensive though.

During your first conversation, you'll feel like you want to manage your life better. You'll realise that you have unlimited issues to handle and deal with. You'll be staying quite alert and patient. They'll make you feel like you should be clear with your priorities. You'll feel like you want to adapt to them and deal with your issues while getting to know them rather than abandon them and your own issues 😭. You'll be feeling supported, supportive, understood and understanding of them. You'll be able to see the potential for something long term but you'll still be trying to keep your options open. I'm getting that you guys are the type to get attached pretty early on during the talking stage so yeah you'll be trying not to get attached. They'll be focused on their life purpose, values and development. They'll be wanting to move forward with your connection too, they'll want to get to know you better. They'll be feeling quite self confident and proud. They'll feel like their hardwork and self commitment is visible to you. They'll feel attracted towards you and will be able to imagine commitment with you.

They'll fall in love with you first. You'll take a month or more to fall in love while they'll take a few days or weeks. They'll fall in love with you because they're the type to easily get bored but they'll enjoy even the most boring things with you. They'll also feel like they kinda can't make you commit to them so it'll be like a challenge to them. It's like they'll be rushing around too much to commit to anyone but they meet you and everything changes. You'll make them think and challenge them. They'll also find you to be very intelligent and ambitious so attraction will just flow. Your connection will be very dynamic, you'll treat each other well while still roasting each other, you'll play around and make jokes but still have mature and deep conversations. They won't be able to understand where they stand with you and they'll want to figure it out really bad. They'll think that you're really dedicated to your own success and who doesn't admire someone ambitious right? You'll fall in love with them because you'll think that they have higher knowledge of some sort. You'll also really admire their ability to overcome obstacles.

You'll also fall in love with them because they teach you a lot and help you better yourself and your life. They change you. At some point, you'll feel as if everything you've become is because of them. You'll not discredit your own hardwork and dedication ofcourse but they'll help you so much, it'll be difficult not to give them credit for your success. They are the type to look to their past and take life lessons to gain clarity and move forward. They'll change you and your life to the point where you'll wonder what would have happened if you never went there, what would've happened if you never met them & just the thought of it terrifies you. You will be trying to distract yourself with work, trying to live selfishly and hiding your kindness even though you're very kind but they'll help you realise that it's okay to be kind. They'll be so kind that you won't be able to help but admire & love them that you'll feel much more comfortable to be kind too. You might not be very nice to them in the beginning though. It'll be difficult for the both of you to let your guards down but especially for you.

They'll say something that will make you have a beautiful epiphany that will totally change your life & they'll only continue making you have more realisations. They'll be so kind, so knowledgeable, so imperfectly perfect that you'll not be able to help but be in awe of them. You'll be entering a new chapter of your life & they'll be exactly what you need. You'll desire them, unbearably. They'll be like a chance to live again. You'll have forgotten what being genuinely happy feels like but they'll awaken that feeling in you. They'll also call you out on your shit but will be nice with it first then assertive later and that's exactly what you'll need and want. About how you'll realise that you love them, something in your life will be causing you confusion of both thoughts & emotions. At that time, they'll say something that'll make you feel extremely grateful, accepted and aware. They'll help you seize opportunities and let go of regret. You might be be the type to be swallowed by your sadness and might be having a hard time even getting out of bed but they'll help you feel motivated and build discipline.

They'll just be living as a self disciplined and wise person. They'll seem very comfortable with themself. You'll feel intrigued. You'll realise that they're one of the healthiest people to be in a relationship of any kind with & when you're in a loss of words. You'll internally accept that you're in love them. They'll make you realise that you have it in you to be successful and abundant. That it is just your carelessness and overconfidence leading to a poor execution and thus unsatisfactory results. Also, be careful, you'll likely not openly accept it at that time and might let your ego and guard get the best of you which will not be helpful to your connection. They'll realise that they're in love with you when they're struggling with temporary pessimism after being over optimistic for some time. At that point, they'll be struggling to see the brighter side of life but you'll help them be optimistic all over again. They'll just be talking to you and you'll bring out a happier side of them by being the pessimistic one. They'll just suddenly realise that they love you including your sometimes harsh sides, your constant need for mental stimulation, blinding ambitions, etc.

You'll intrigue them with your questions, you'll challenge them and make them think. There will be times when they'll feel the need to be really quick with you, in regards to action. Since, they usually don't feel that way, it'll not take them much to realise that they're in love with you once they start feeling urges to tell you stuff or do things for you. They'll admire your dedication to success, you'll be working on or towards something when you'll meet them. You'll be confident and self assured which will motivate them to be the same way too. They'll be too shy to confess it though. You seem to have options, there'll be a lot of competition when it comes to you. They'll feel overwhelmed by how much affection they have towards you. They'll think about giving up very often but even on trying to do so, they won't be able to. One of you will wonder if it's just a waste of your power, time and energy. One of you will have a lot of doubt, like 'what if they don't feel the same connection and it's just me?'. People might actually say things like "why would they even like you?" or might talk shit about one of you behind your back.

So, whoever that person is will be hurt and burdened by other people's opinions on your connection. These people will just shred one of your confidence and fill you with fear and embarassment. I just heard "what is wrong with me?" I'm getting that they'll confess first but it'll be indirect. Then, one day they'll accomplish something or you'll accomplish something and you'll celebrate together and they'll suddenly confess/propose again. They'll tell you things like "everyone adores and respects you, it's not just me". This time it will be very direct and forward. There's a chance that other people are present too. This was cute, take care.

[astrow0rldx]

Seduction Types

BE THAT MANIPULATIVE POWERFUL FEMME FATALE.

No matter how unconventionally attractive you perceive your face, body, or overall appearance. Or if you think your one of the best looking people out here, beauty is literally in the eye of the beholder. Attraction is literally psychological. Beauty standards, The person you idolize or attached to. But that's the power over knowing how to control someone psyche, you can be the ultimate in their eye & take control. This goes for relationships to the whole room.

Psychological Study from the book Art of Seduction by Robert Greene

The Siren

Seduces your senses, smells good, talk sexy, feels good, touches nice, looks good, taste good, etc etc. Sensual, physically stimulating. Has feminine energy, Charming, Graceful, Beautiful, Empathetic, Loving. An irresistible allure. She's clearly special, a prize so keep that allure by seeming unattainable. Never appear needy or desperate, because that signifies too much vulnerability for people to have power over you, YOU & your confidence controls your narrative. Mysterious & Unpredictable where you are high value. Take advantage of the push-pull manipulation tactic for emotional highs & lows and attach them. Make sure to make them feel exclusive & special to, so they can still honor you but THEIR ecstasy & worth lives in you. Target people fear of abandonment & desire for escape. Be exotic & make them act on emotion & impulse.

Ideal Lover

You understand Human Nature & their need to fill a void. more excitement, more more meaning, more connection. Position yourself to the answer to their search & be their soulmate. Create a fantasy, study and peep out their insecurities & needs. So you can make them co-dependent, where you are their meaning to life, you make them feel complete & fulfilled. Be their ideal for everything they been looking for. Mirror them, empathize and make them feel very comfortable with you. Figure out their missing piece & void to fill, then fill it. Thrive on their Broken dreams from Childhood.

Dandy

Thrive in your individuality, be that alien. Create your own persona, be eccentric & authentically you. Don't live to be liked. Most people feel that way & are trapped within their limited roles that the world expects us to play. People are attracted to people who are more fluid & free than us, excite them you can't be categorized. Play with fashion & gender roles. Dandy is Ambiguous, Unique, Free & liberating. Stirs up people repressed desires, be what they don't understand. You are a Rebel, Unpredictable. Break that mold!!! Don't conform to any standards of masculinity or femininity. Be rare & unusual that intrigues people & fascinates their attention and curiosity. Your hard to pin down, but you also don't reveal a lot. Very Mysterious, like a puzzle, exciting adventure. If your so bold & different where people feel comfortable exploring and expressing their own suppressed desires, it makes people feel non-judged & restricted by you.

The Natural

Unlike other archetypes, The natural is less toxic & more transparent & Straight-forward. Kind of like a best friend, genuine, a carefree child. All about creating an emotional connection. But targeting their childhood nostalgia, spontaneous, sincerity. Make them feel at ease, comfortable and caught up in your playful spirit. Neutralize their defensiveness being playful & innocent. Don't take things to serious & show emotional vulnerability to create intimacy and relatability. Express flaws, and weakness with humor and humility. Make people want to care & nurture you, protect you. Live in the moment, have fun and make things feel fresh & new. life of the party energy. Your their non-burden! your effortlessly easy-going so your confident in your skin, but it doesn't seem arrogant. Be unpredictable, exciting. Show joy & enthusiasm.

Coquette

The ultimate emotional manipulator. Play with the fear of abandonment & rejection. Delay their gratification, giving enough attention, affection or interest to keep the target intrigues, but then pull back, create a sense of longing. Very patient game. But it's all about making them idolize your attention & affection, to keep it more valued. Your always creating emotional tension, hot & cold, people are trying to guess your feelings. Never makes thing easy!! Often disappear and become unavailable right when they are the most interested. Make them compete, & be jealous. Mixed signals, build anticipation. Most importantly have an air of independence, never be needy and your sufficient in yourself. You are the prize, your affection is the prize. You have to stay in control & never have them feeling to clear, stay mysterious.

The Charmer

Charmer plays with people most primary weakness, their ego. Your going to target them by making them feel special, but still being exclusive. Deflecting attention from yourself, & focus on the target. But still not being needy & be very detached. Be witty & entertaining to empathetic and sincere. Flexible & ADAPTABLE. Remain calm, composed, & IN THE MOMENT. Be observant & attentive to really know how to play your cards. Projecting confidence without arrogance, approachable & not self-centered, but still comfortable in themself. Be inviting, friendly, positive, make people feel comfortable while making them feel unique & important. Charmers are skilled at finding common grounds & making them feel familiar and understood & relatable. Mirror body language, speech patterns. Subtly give them thoughtful compliments to make them feel uniquely appreciated. Avoid conflict & tension to build emotional connection.

The Star

Standing out from others, make us want to watch them. Their key is their like a blank canvas for fantasies & desires. People escape in their greatness, so they are vague & ethereal. They achieve large, best style, best looking, shine uniquely, big achievements, just extraordinary where you stand out especially in social situations. Be unattainable, a blank canvas & confident in your life. Make them imagine, and idolize you. Be a celebrity.

[camille-plumb]

𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐔𝐏𝐎𝐍 𝐀 𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆|| ʙʟᴜᴇʟᴏᴄᴋᵒⁿᵉ ˢʰᵒᵗˢ

Michael Kaiser x Female Reader

••═╬✦░░░░𝐃𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄░░░░✦╬═••

Song: Maneater by Daryl Hall & John Oates

Warning: Litle smut.🔞

Tags: domination, role-playing

••••••••⇆ㅤ◁ㅤ ❚❚ㅤ ▷↻••••••••

The Munich gala was in full swing. The hall glowed with golden light, and stars from football, fashion, and business mingled in a spectacle of power, beauty, and ostentation. Michael Kaiser, the young German footballer with blue eyes and blond hair, was in his element. With his arrogant smile and imposing bearing, he walked among the audience as if the whole world belonged to him.

He'd never had to do much to get women to approach him, but that night there was something in the air. Something he couldn't quite place, but felt in every fiber of his being. (TN) stood there, in the middle of the room, as always, a mystery wrapped in a body-hugging black dress that took his breath away. And, as always, the magnetism she emanated was so palpable that everyone around her seemed to vanish.

But what really drove him crazy was the fact that, even though (Y/N) had played with him, seduced him, and left his heart burning, there was an unwritten rule between them: they could never, ever, appear to have known each other outside of their clandestine encounters.

That night, amidst the banal conversations and constant admiration for him, Michael tried to concentrate. He mostly succeeded, but every time his gaze met (Y/N)'s, the fire would rekindle.

(Y/N) was like a rose, so beautiful in everyone's eyes, so perfect, so unattainable, like every rose she had thorns, thorns that had given her a reputation, touching her thorns could hurt anyone who dares to bother her, that is if you were anyone other than him, the blond thought with a smile on his face while drinking a glass of Don Perignon champagne.

She knew how to keep him on edge. And now, that icy calm on her face left him completely bewildered. Minutes later, when Michael thought he couldn't stand the tension anymore, he finally saw her.

(Y/N) was chatting with a group of businessmen, one of them a retired former soccer player, the kind of man she always charmed with her kindness and penetrating gaze. Michael swallowed and felt a pang of jealousy.

He found it amusing that she always seemed to ignore him, avoiding his gaze, leaving his messages on read, and always returning the blue roses he sent her at work. Despite all her inconsiderations, flirting in front of everyone and listening to her flirtatiously and cleverly get out of the situation was one of his greatest and most guilty pleasures; and tonight he definitely wasn't going to miss out on his dose of pleasure.

With a haughty smile, he approached them, self-assured, his presence never going unnoticed.

"Why do I have a feeling I have to wait in line to talk to the beautiful (Y/N)?" he said, with a characteristic sarcastic tone as he stood next to the group. (Y/N) looked up slowly, his expression calm and neutral, but his eyes shone with something else.

"Michael," she replied with calculated cordiality. "What a surprise to see you here. Or had you already forgotten that there were other people around you?" The way she said that, so coldly, so distantly, made him feel as if he'd been pushed out of his own realm. He couldn't help but smile wryly. "So this is the game we're going to play."

The conversation continued as if nothing had happened between them. (Y/N) maintained her facade of coldness, and he, despite being aware of what was happening, carried on as if nothing had happened. No one around them seemed to notice the subtle tension surrounding them. No one knew what lay beneath their smiles.

Michael felt his pride hurt, but at the same time, he liked it. He liked how (Y/N) put him in his place, how she reminded him that not everything in the world could be controlled by him. However, that feeling of vulnerability, of being replaced, tore him apart inside. (Y/N) knew exactly how to play with him.

"Did you know it's rude to spy on people on their private dates?" (Y/N) added, still smiling, but with a spark of defiance in her eyes.

Michael, feeling a pang of jealousy, looked at her with an expression laced with sarcasm: "Are you serious? Me, Michael Kaiser, the Emperor, worried about who you kiss in your free time?" "Don't make me laugh, darling." It was a simple thing to say, but deep down, something told him he couldn't bear that image in his mind.

The tension was palpable. (Y/N) grimaced slightly, as if amused to see how uncomfortable she'd made him. But instead of continuing the provocation, she stood up from the group, disappearing from sight, leaving Michael with a bitter feeling in his stomach.

As night fell, after the gala, Michael walked through the hallways of the luxurious hotel. (Y/N) hadn't looked at him again, and it was killing him. He couldn't stop thinking about her indifference.

In his mind, the equation was clear: (Y/N) wanted him, but she was never going to let him have her, at least not now, and it didn't seem like she'd ever get to in the near future either. "And that's what I like most about her," he told himself, but the idea of ​​her playing with him, without showing even a hint of affection, drove him mad.

Just when he thought it was all over, he saw her. (Y/N) was alone, walking toward the elevator, completely oblivious to his presence. Michael didn't think twice. His ego and desire to claim her were stronger than his frustration. He caught up with her just before the elevator doors closed.

"It's rude to leave without saying goodbye, mein liebe," he said with a defiant smile, crossing his arms. (Y/N) didn't flinch, but the shadow of a smile appeared on her lips.

"Mein liebe, huh?… I thought you didn't want us to be seen together," she said, her tone cold as always, but with something more to it, a kind of irony disguised as indifference.

"And that's right, I don't want to be seen together," he retorted, sarcasm lacing every word. "What if I suddenly want the whole world to know you're mine?"

(Y/N) stared at him, her eyes reflecting a mixture of amusement and contempt. "Mine? And who told you I'm yours, Michael?" (Y/N) took a step toward him, the air between them thick with tension. "I'm not property, and if I were, you definitely wouldn't own me, understood?"

The clash of emotions was so strong he could almost touch it. The pressure in his chest burned him. (Y/N) was like a fire that, instead of consuming him, let him burn slowly, until he couldn't bear it anymore.

And then, something in him broke. Unable to control his feelings, Michael took her by the waist, and their lips met in a fierce kiss, charged with passion and desire. It was a desperate kiss, a need to claim what he couldn't have. For a moment, the whole world disappeared around them, and only the two of them existed.

When they broke apart, (Y/N)'s gaze was intense, full of irony, but also something more. Michael was breathing heavily, still trapped by the intensity of the kiss, but he knew he could no longer resist her.

"(Y/N)…" he murmured, his voice low, almost broken. "I love you, I need you, I miss you, bitte meine liebe…"

She stared at him, not showing a hint of vulnerability, but with a touch of softness in her eyes. "Then come with me," she said softly, with an authority that left no room for doubt. "Surrender to me, and stop fighting the inevitable."

And so, Michael, the man who had always been in control, surrendered. Wordlessly, he followed her. They both entered the elevator, kissing and caressing, and ascended to the hotel penthouse, a place isolated from the outside world, where nothing could interfere with what was about to happen.

The penthouse doors opened, and Michael could no longer turn back. Everything he thought about control and power crumbled in that instant. Desire and passion took hold of him as they continued walking toward the inevitable.

Every moan, every grunt of pleasure was paid for with his pride, how low had the emperor sunk to beg? his arrogant conscience asked as he sobbed with pleasure begging her to not stop riding him, taking him so deep with force, every movement was a mark on her skin, he belonged to her, she had marked herself on his body and his heart more than the ink of a tattoo.

He savored her body, her moans, her gasps. Knowing that he was the only one who could have her boosted his ego. They changed positions. He stretched her legs and took her gently, his movements slow to prolong the moment as much as possible. He intertwined their hands as he looked into her beautiful eyes. Her mouth gently invited him to taste her lips, still moving.

He begged to leave his seed in her, to mark her somehow, to let everyone know that she belonged to him, just as he belonged to her.

He was hers, and he couldn't deny it.

The night continued between new promises and the desire to give himself over and over again.

A bright light crossed the room illuminating the place, he didn't try to look for her because he knew she wouldn't be there, his alarm reminded him that there was one hour left for his interview, the hard blow of loneliness hit him, despite all the promises he made her she hadn't believed him and judging by the way she left he surely wouldn't see her again.

He took a shower while he thought about what to do. He'd already made up his mind. It was time for the emperor to have an empress, he thought, finishing dressing and leaving the hotel with his car keys in his hands.

The interview followed its normal pace. The interviewer recounted his football career, asked his opinions of some players, and asked him questions about his preferences on the pitch. Everything was going smoothly until the final part of the interview.

His personal life…

I try to maintain my composure and his usual arrogant smile. The inevitable question comes: "Michael, we know you're one of the most eligible bachelors in the world of football. You've remained that way since the beginning of your career. However, we who've known you since your first match also know your history of women and your scandals. Yesterday you were seen staying at the hotel with a Russian model after the gala, last week you were seen with a Victoria's Secret model in your car, and on your vacation you were caught in compromising positions on your private yacht. Your fans are wondering if the emperor is planning to settle down or if he will continue to indulge his base desires, harming his performance on the field. What do you think about this?"

I finish listening to the question, looking up to see the multitudes of eyes and cameras waiting for an answer.

I sigh with a laugh that caught the attention of everyone present.

"I think my girlfriend is a very passionate woman, so much so that the press has turned her into different people," he continues with laughter, amid the astonished gazes of the reporters who listened to him in disbelief. "What can I say? Since we started dating half a year ago, she's been with me most of the time. And as for whether my nightlife will affect my performance on the field... I think she should give that answer, don't you think so (Y/N)?"

The room fell completely silent. (Y/N), who was in the audience, showed no reaction, but her eyes shone with a mixture of surprise and amusement. Michael, on the other hand, had just done something he'd never done before: acknowledge his vulnerability in public. Despite everything, despite the fact that he would never publicly admit that (Y/N) had him completely at her mercy, he had just declared her his.

That woman who was desired by all was his empress, and it was time the world found out.

•••••━━━━━━━ •♬• ━━━━━━━••••••

•••••━━━━━━━ •♬• ━━━━━━━••••••

[xvysarene]

𝔽𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕕 𝕐𝕠𝕦

Pairing: Zayne x Fem!Reader Prompt: Inspired by the quote “I love you in every timeline”, but with a twist Words: ~870 Genre: Eventual fluff Notice: Spoilers of Zayne’s ‘Tower of Secrets’ myth & ‘Still in Dark’ anecdote

[ᝰ.ᐟ MASTERLIST]

Throughout his entire existence, Zayne believed that Astra’s punishment condemned him to eternal separation from his true love; forced to either sacrifice himself or spiral out of control upon her death.

But was this truly his punishment, or merely an obstacle? A cruel way to derail him from finding the one.

Thus, when he managed to save his childhood friend without any further complications—without having to give up or lose himself because she survived—he should have felt relieved.

Felt a sense of completeness that he had dreamt for so long.

Instead, the hollowness, the whisper of something just out of reach remained.

“What more do you want from me?” he cursed Astra. Cursing His sick, twisted game.

And so, as he ventured back through his memories, aside from the occasional encounters with others, there was always one person who inexplicably found him.

You.

You, who managed to pick up his broken pieces as he lamented.

You, who brought a sense of comfort like no other.

You, who always mysteriously disappeared in the end, forgotten by him.

“Zayne?” a surprise gasp left your lips.

His fingers remained wrapped around your wrist, stopping you from walking out of his life for the umpteenth time.

The setting sun accentuated your silhouette, as if emphasising the answer he had blindly missed in every other timeline.

“Am I Astra's punishment for you?”

And you, condemned to stay by his side, an unattainable man whose eyes and life were always set on another woman.

“What exactly is His punishment to you?” he pleaded, begging to understand. 

He would be damned if he let you vanish again this time, not when he had finally found the one he was destined to be with.

A pang of remorse washed over him as he heard your answer: “To be the fleeting pillar for the man who never looks my way, destined to forget me eventually.”

Just like him, you bore different personas in every alternate universe.

While everyone had forgotten the Foreseer and the Tower of Thorns, they had also forgotten about you—the only other person who had befriended the Foreseer and kept him company in his loneliness.

It was your laughter that thawed the icy hallways of the tower, just to be silenced once a woman intent on stealing the Creatio Protocore arrived.

He then remembered the surviving nurse, living in the same decaying city as Dawnbreaker, patching him up after every chaotic fight with the Abomination and Wanderers, and comforting him as he washed away Georgie's blood from his hands.

“Every time she appears, your memory of me will fade,” you whispered, eyes searching his in disbelief. “How have you not forgotten about me now?”

Oh, how bittersweet it was to continually forget the one who first taught your heart to love.

Unable to resist any longer, Zayne tugged you into his embrace, fearing that you might slip away.

In his arms, you fit perfectly, like the last chapter of a series, completing him.

“How could you remain so kind, when all I ever did was take, and take, and take from you?” The growing lump in his throat nearly choked him.

“If anyone needs a shoulder to lean on, it's you, Zayne. I've never regretted being there for you.” With a gentle touch, your palm came to rest on his heart. “There must be a reason I'm meant to stay by your side, even if it’s momentary.”

For the first time, he felt warm. A different kind of warmth that spread through him like a soft flame kindling deep within his heart.

“All my life, I've always set my sight on the wrong woman. My punishment is to be separated from you, not her.” Gazing at your eyes, bright with unshed tears, was like a punch to his sternum. “I wish you hated me now.”

“Why?” you murmured.

Lifting your chin, he lowered his gaze to your lips, closing the distance between you slowly. “Because then you’ll push me away, knowing that I am unworthy of this.”

And as your eyes fluttered closed instead, mouth already anticipating his, every fibre of restraint shattered.

Both of your lips locked without hesitation, releasing pure longing that had been confined for so long, now unleashed in a wave of intense emotions.

The world dissolved into the intoxicating sensation of lips moulding together. One of his arms pulled at your waist, fingers gripping your curve, drawing you even nearer. 

He realised right then and there that he would never have enough of your taste.

“Do you think this is Astra’s wicked scheme? That you still remember me after all this time, yet impending misfortune awaits us?” Traces of doubt were evident in your hushed whisper, lips lightly brushing with his still.

“Astra be damned.” The condemning words rumbled deeply from his chest, causing you to look at him in surprise. 

“He may test me, but he’ll not take you away from me. Never again.” Strong hands cradled your face, trailing gentle kisses from your forehead, down to your nose, and finally to your lips. “As long as I draw breath, I'll spend every moment fighting for you.”

In every possible timeline, he had loved you first, and in this moment, his love for you remained unwavering.

⤷ ᝰ.ᐟ MASTERLIST