#a message for the bad days

[treba-neco-napise]

A message for the bad days

I wrote this after I got from a period of pretty bad depression and anxiety and realized that I just needed some doomsday protocol for when it happens (spoiler: I didn't put it together before I got into another). I took it out yesterday and reading it helped me a lot. So I'm sharing in hope it helps someone else who resonates with it.

(This is very personal and not written for notes, I'm just hoping it might reach someone in need. So I'll be deleting criticism and blocking haters, don't waste that time.)

Hey, buddy. This is just your anxiety speaking. I know you don't think it is - it is. Your brain is scared, it shuts down certain parts of itself and keeps running on anxiety to keep itself safe from threats because it registers one threat you're currently under and from past experience concludes that you're threatened from all directions.

You're not.

There will be the good days, I assure you. Please believe me, you will feel better, and when the good days come back, you'll realize how awful you were truly feeling. It's good that you got through it. You got through all that abuse and bullying and hiding who you are and you're still here today, scarred but still standing.

Please stop comparing yourself to others in suffering, we all have our fights and no one is judging how you cope with fighting them. And if someone is, ignore them. You're hurting nobody but yourself, the one you definitely shouldn't be hurting.

Please reach out. Write down a list of people you don't trust and why. Write down another list of people you do trust and reach out, start a conversation with them even if you think it's meaningless and without a purpose. I'm speaking from experience, you will feel better talking to someone. You might come up with ideas for more discussion as you go. If you think they'll be annoyed that you want to talk to them, do it anyway. They won't be, they like talking to you, that's why you trust them. And if they are, they're not worth it. It's not your fault, ok? If they don't appreciate you as you are, I do. I love you just as you are and I'm sending a big, firm hug. Yes, you, the reader, you don't think I mean you but I do. You're enough, you're enough just as you are. If you're thinking whether I'd say that to a murderer and/or a narcissist, yes, I would. And if they're enough, of course you are.

No "should"-ing will fix the world. I know you know how it all should be and that it seems simple to know, you're a smart and good creature. Not everybody is like that, unfortunately, and that's okay. The world is the way it is and we have to roll with that, your mind might be too far in its idea and the world can't catch up with it. Let go. You know yourself that perfect world would be far from perfect in reality.

Stop to smell the roses, stop right now, stop what you're doing, don't ask why for a moment, just be in your shoes, in your perspective for a minute.

Okay?

That feels better, right? Good, keep that going. Stay in that. Summon the other perspectives when you need them and until then, stay in your shoes. You don't have to consider everything all the time.

Don't sacrifice your wellbeing. That test or appointment doesn't matter in the long run. You might fail or miss it despite all that effort. It's not your fault, okay? If you're going to put that much effort into something, make it a deal. Imagine it, visualise it as a contract with yourself - you do this big amount of work but you'll stop at a certain time, no matter how much or little you got done, and will make peace with it even if you don't want to. You will rest after this amount of work, properly rest, and you can add a specific reward for that. But make sure you accept it as a reward after you know it. Get up and do the workout even if you don't feel like it, just a jumping jack or a push-up. You will like it when you give in and accept the pain, stop fighting it and watch over yourself, making sure you're still okay.

Don't abandon yourself, ever, be your own best friend at all times when everybody else is against you, even if everything you believe in is wrong, trust yourself and be kind to yourself. When you start spiralling and abandoning yourself and not listening to yourself, stop. Really, stop right now, again,

See that? The Earth is still spinning.

The world hasn't fallen apart because you stopped racing just for a moment. Now, think it all through, consider if you really have to do all this right now, today, this week, this month, this year.

Can it wait?

Yes?

Would postponing it cause more problems?

No?

Okay, you can do it tomorrow, or schedule it for another day.

It's not your failure, it's not incompetency to put off what makes you feel this bad to be overwhelmed by. Don't overload yourself, you know what happens - you end up here again. :D

Be kind to yourself, put it off and schedule rest first.

[theoldkyokodied]

You know which scene I am basing this on. Also (kisses all the fanfic writers on the mouth) thank you for your service

Bonus:

Edit: DISCLAIMER: Before you decide to watch Re-Animator, make sure to check for content warnings, there is a scene that a lot of people choose to skip!

[maddie-grove]

I know it’s been eleven years and it’s a movie for children, but I do think it’s very funny that one of the messages of Frozen is “love at first sight isn’t real and believing in it will get you almost killed! Love after three days, however…”

[alpacacare-archive]

hey guys is anybody here. hello

@smarties-art

[littlestkoi-n]

the rage I feel when reading Blood of Olympus chapters 45-56 is almost equivalent in magnitude to the absolute joy I experience when reading The Last Olympian chapters 1-23.

remember when percabeth was good? when they meant the world to each other but had other people they cared about (nico, for one. both of them. so much), other worries and other storylines aside from their romantic plot? and when nico's completed arc wasn't repeated for no reason other than to dump more trauma on the youngest character in the series? when background characters were included in the story not for all the unnecessary last minute romantic subplots but because they were fun and fascinating to learn more about? and were actually friends with main characters? remember when grover was percy and annabeth's best friend forever? and antagonists were actually interesting and intimidating and had compelling goals? and the story revolved around friendship and family and loyalty? and death was definite and loss was palpable and battles were thrilling?

yeah. good times.

[collophora]

Hi there !!! I wanted to let you know your bad batch art is BEAUTIFUL I'm always happy to see it cross my dash!! Your art style is so pretty and I love the way you draw Tech!!

Do you have anymore sketches of Tech we haven't seen yet? No pressure <3!!! Have a lovely day :DD

Oh my that's so sweet thank you! éAè <3 <3 <3 Hughhhhh well since you ask nicely I dug into my wip folder and found a sketch ^^

[myokk]

an afternoon by the black lake🫶🫶🫶

[pushing500]

Ah, Xina. I see you have chosen... DEATH (we didn't kill her this time, but I was sorely tempted to).

The Empire is still under the impression that we're working together or something, and since we don't feel like breaking the illusion yet, Mechi reluctantly agreed to look after four paralysed prisoners who are (allegedly) from ancient cryptosleep caskets. I find that a bit tricky to believe because...

Paul? I recognise that name...

It seems that XiaoLiang's granddad from a similar prisoner quest has somehow re-contracted paralytic abasia, and also convinced The Empire that he's from an ancient cryptosleep vault. I am now weirdly curious about what strange shenanigans this grandpa must get up to.

The more I play this game, the less convinced I am that Mechi and Kwahu are the main characters... 🤔

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[faunandfloraas]

Lockscreens 🐰🩷🗝

[mourninglamby]

helloooo i just wanted to say i've been a fan of your work for a couple years now i think? & dsmp means a ton to me but i had to cut it from my life after the inconsolable differences stream cuz i lost all faith in the creators and the fandom to be normal abt the story. point being i've started looking at your art again and it is seriously so breathtaking and inspiring to me and is reigniting my love for dsmp (which is to say, reigniting my love for the few fans like you who turned it into something worthwhile). i learned so much about myself thru ctommy and made some of the closest friendships in my life in the fandom so it made me incredibly sad to think that time would only ever leave a sour taste in my mouth, and i'm super grateful to you for seeing the story for what it was, criticizing the things that deeply need to be criticized and recognizing the good parts and transforming them into something new. sorry if this is incoherent just wanted to say thank you and i hope you're well!! <3 take care

anon i think we had extremely similar experiences.. To be candid, I never would have even begun to understand what happened to me if I had not watched dsmp. I identify closely with c!Tommy because there hasn't ever been another character like him that resonates with me and my experiences. And I've also made most of my closest friends thru dsmp! There is a silver lining to everything, and I will forever be thankful that I found my most beloved companions and like-minded people thru dsmp.

However, people will always try to make you feel horrible about it, and undermine the importance of this character and the themes in the story because they refuse to try and understand. And the fandom itself is a monster, constantly proving it is not a safe space for victims nor those with more complicated mental health issues. But I want it to be! And I'm beyond grateful that I could provide some comfort for you in the midst of the incessant adversity plagued on us by anti-intellectual assholes. What I and many others do with dsmp is a reclamation of the abuse narrative. I want to explore c!Tommy and his relationships in ways the canon series could not, so I can give myself and others the ending that we deserved. One that upholds victims as survivors, not as means to an end. I don't know if it's appropriate to tack on, but I've been hard at work structuring how I will divulge from canon in Mortis Metamorphosis, and this has only fanned that flame... I'm so excited to share it with everyone.

anyways ..thank you x 1 trillion for this extremely kind message, I read it as I was walking home from work and it made me start crying like a babyyyy but it was cathartic af to know that when I post my work, it's not for nothing and it does reach people... Wishing you nothing but happiness and comfort anony, stay safe and take care of yourself... xoxo.

[cattons]

watching the tiktokification of saltburn in real time. i need to wipe this film off the face of the earth it’s for me and my mutuals only

[strawberrytalia]

actually i love bruce and duke’s dynamic because everytime it’s essentially just:

Bruce telling him about this very unhinged plan he has

And Duke displaying one ounce of concern, and then immediately agreeing

[jesuistrestriste]

“h-hey…” I muttered, leaning against my very expensive limited edition hello kitty Ferrari did I mention expensive, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. “w-w-would you write art breakup angst?”

(I deeply apologise for this😞)

heyyy anon ahaha *cups ur chin and kisses u on the forehead* i can do that 4 u babygirl <3

personally, i think art does NOT handle breakups well. i mean,, no one rlly does, but art really crumbles from the inside-out.

if you’ve seen howl’s moving castle, he fr gets like howl when sophie messed up the magic potions for his hair. like he wilts into himself and honestly gets really depressed:(

like i can see him being extremely anxious when the break-up first happens, doubting his worth and what he brings to the table, and then he just immediately sinks into a very deep sadness.

like he misses you, he needs you, and you’re not there to hold him..

doesn’t text patrick for two days, so pat comes over to his place to discover him in bed, crying. brings art a protein shake from a shop on the corner and has to rub his back and sit next to him while he drinks it so he won’t start sobbing again. i really see patrick being his rock throughout:(

pat also has to take art’s phone from time to time so that he won’t drunk call you at 2 am and leave voicemails that just contain him slurring and begging for you to take him back. it’s very sad. his voice breaks a lot and you can very clearly hear him sniffling and hiccuping. poor sweet artie :/

[moonkhao]

hi.

[spaciebabie]

at first getting diagnosed with cptsd was like, "yay my trauma has been validated (it always was valid)!" and i really thought that was going to be it, but then i started to do research as i do whenever i realize i have something and learned that!! the way i experience socialization is!! quite horrid actually!!

[butteronabun]

Diluc in a modern AU coming to get you home after a long and tiring day. His presence surprising ( and gracing ) everyone as this tall, quiet, and intimidating man approaches you.

He doesn’t forget to greet your friends. He’s brief, polite, and up close, he’s very dreamy. Then his words are quiet, reserved to only you and only you when he turns to you.

He calls you “love,” before a “let’s go home?” while he holds your hand and slowly pulls you closer. You smile sweetly at him, answer an “okay!” and he’s never better.

Your friends swoon at him and you in the background. All are delighted and all are supportive from the sight. This is the first time they’ve met Diluc Ragnvindr, and they’re all curious about how he has stolen your heart.