#a little companion piece to the one you wrote :)
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skyheld · 1 month ago
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You have done wonders already. I am—do not think me ungrateful, Hakkon. (from @aestuum)
THE BEAR & THE NIGHTINGALE PART II | accepting | @aestuum
"And yet you disapprove, Warden."
He sits on the edge of the infirmary bed, statue-still, willing his pulse to stay even as Casadh turns his wrist over in their hands with unneeded gentleness. The bones have fused again, but not correctly. To set them right they need first be broken, and in the right places, along the fault-lines. It is easier for Hakkon to suppress the pain if he is fully in charge; it goes through him, then, and he can keep it from reaching the other presence, pressed into the back of their minds. It is not necessary, Ameridan says, but it is part of their deal. You will no longer be in pain.
Or perhaps Hakkon is only looking for an excuse to be in control.
"Though I have done wonders, it is not enough." The tea brewing over the fire carries thick herbal scents, heady and unpleasant. Something calming, Hakkon assumes, with a grimace. Something strengthening and perhaps something to further dull the pain. Well, he needs not be the one to drink it. "We have gotten hurt. We have been tired. This is not acceptable to you. You would see us reduced to sitting around a campfire sharing stories and caring for children. Perhaps you would see us restricted bed-rest. But that is not our choice."
There is a slight smile at the first crack, even as he must reach out to pluck the sensation from its roots and crush it. Spirits feel pain, but not the way physical bodies do. It twists and tears but has no weight to it. This is life, as much a part of it as hunger and weariness. But it is not for him, as he made a promise.
"It is not our choice", he repeats, at the second, careful crack, reopening the sealed fractures so they can be set properly and healed anew. "This is our choice. Should it break us, know that it was our choice to break."
Some wisps are hesitant to come into the presence of a god, but a few are brave. They come at the Warden's call to wrap around the battered limb, their very essence a caress. Hakkon sees and feels the healing begin, though Casadh has warned that it will be slow; a week, at best, until they grip a battle-axe again. The bones, broken twice, will be liable to shifting or fracturing further if they aren't given time to heal throughout. It does not mean bedrest, but it does mean they stay away from battle.
Sorrow, when they find out, will be most vexing in their concern.
Hakkon looks at the wrist as the swelling slowly settles a little. The bruising will remain; it's only clotted blood, nothing damaging in and of itself. "Should it break us", he says, "know also that I did what I could." He shifts, finally, the fingers of his other hand closing. "I am doing what I can."
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bring-forth-his-sac · 5 months ago
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World of Trouble
Summary: Your Halloween costume leads to a punishment from the man himself...
Pairing: Saviors! Negan x f!reader
Tags: !NSFW! spanking, fingering, p in v penetration, (consensual) punishment sex, Negan being a cocky asshole, orgasm denial, praise kink, teasing, dirty talk, pet names, little bit of cum play ?
Word Count: 4.2k
A/N: ok this fic is choppy, janky and just all over the place. I wrote it in a day and a half so it was a complete rush cause I want to get it out for Halloween so yeah, pls be kind
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You thought it was funny.
After all, don’t people need a joke in times like this? Isn’t everything bleak enough? That was your reasoning when the idea initially popped into your head for the perfect apocalyptic Halloween costume.
Despite Negan being a man who loves to tell a joke, no matter how risqué or inappropriate the timing, you weren’t sure how Negan would react if he's the butt of one. 
Ever since late August, you had been wavering on the idea. Some nights you were adamant that your choice in Halloween costume would end in you being bound to the fence alongside the dead. 
In the midst of your internal debate, while out on a run, you came across the ultimate sign that set aside your indecision. 
A leather jacket.
It wasn’t an exact replica of Negan’s and it hung loosely on your frame but it was the push you needed. You already had a white t-shirt in your limited closet and you’d pay the few points needed for some black jeans. 
A red scarf was harder to come across but most definitely a necessary piece. Ever since the leaves began to fall off the trees surrounding the Sanctuary, Negan’s red scarf has been making an appearance, tucked neatly in by the collar of his leather jacket.
You had to be inventive, scavenging an old sweater and cutting it up to create a makeshift scarf that at least remotely resembled the original.
And finally, the pièce de résistance. Your trusty companion. Your very own, bootleg Lucille. 
Thankfully barbed wire wasn’t the problem. In the Sanctuary, something like that can be found stored in at least half of the supply closets, hoarded away for the fence or in case the real Lucille needs a quick spruce up.
The real issue was a baseball bat. It wasn’t as if the Saviors were regularly raiding school gyms or stadiums, and so there was hardly any sports equipment for you to choose from.
It was a struggle and eventually, you ended up with a hockey stick that some Savior decided to put into the armoury.
It wasn’t Lucille but hell, it’d have to do.
Everything was ready. You even found some long expired brown eyeshadow and decided to dab some on the bottom of your face so it looks like you have a beard. And so your look was complete, possibly the very first costume to ever exist of your fearsome leader.
And how long did it last?
40 minutes. It didn’t even take a full hour of you strutting around before word got back to Negan. 
When you imagined the impending confrontation, you assumed it would be a lieutenant telling you off as Negan spewed insults over a walkie talkie.
It’s only now, when you hear the low grating noise of Lucille dragging along the ground, growing nearer and nearer, do you realise you won’t be getting off so easily. 
Slowly turning, you bring your hockey stick decorated in barbed wire up to your shoulder, mirroring a pose you’ve seen him do plenty of times.
“Well, ho-ly shit! I don’t know whether I should be smug or freaked the fuck out!” he declares, his gaze wandering down your outfit “you’ve really out done yourself this time, doll”.
You shrug, hoping that if you seem casual about this then he’ll let it slide. “It’s Halloween” you say bluntly, hoping that’s the only excuse you need. 
Some Saviors linger around you both, a mixture of excitement and anticipation radiating from them at your Negan costume and Negan's ambiguous reaction.
“And you thought the creepiest thing you could dress up as is me?” he narrows his eyes at you, subconsciously mimicking your own pose as he lifts Lucille up onto his shoulder. 
You open your mouth to respond but no words come out, a slight sense of dread setting in. A beat of tense silence hangs in the air, thick and charged, as if the whole Sanctuary is holding its breath. 
A deep chuckle cuts through the silence as Negan clasps a hand on your free shoulder. 
“Well, fuck me, I am honored!” he beams “you even smeared some shit on your face so ya look like you got a beard! Now that’s the kind of dedication I like to see from you sorry fucks!”.
He steps away from you, letting his hand drop off of your shoulder as he raises his voice, making sure the others hear.
Relief washes over you. You could feel the tension draining from your muscles at his approval. 
“I love it,” Negan says, his voice growing serious again “but Lucille? Now Lucille here isn’t a big fan of copy cats and that limp dick excuse of a Lucille you got hanging over your shoulder? That shit just makes her see red”.
Any warmth in Negan’s eyes fade. His brows knit together as his mouth becomes a hard line, replacing any sense of humor. “And she thinks this is worthy of a punishment” he adds.
Fuck. 
Negan doesn’t wait around for your reaction, turning on his heels as he barks for you to follow. You do so hesitantly, knowing there’s nowhere to run and that this is something you’ll unfortunately have to face head on.
This isn’t the first time you’ve done something daring while living in the Sanctuary. Although, this is the first time you’ve seen him genuinely annoyed. 
Usually Negan has always appreciated your boldness, especially when most of the Sanctuary’s residents are too scared to even look him in the eye. In the past, you’ve tried to poke and prod at Negan’s authority by complaining about sanitary products costing points or the lack of blankets available to the workers during Winter. 
Grimacing to yourself as you follow behind him, you wonder if you’ve finally taken it too far.
Marching up the flights of stairs to his private quarters, you try to ignore the confused looks of others as two Negan's pass them by. 
Despite knowing you’re in for a world of trouble, a small smirk tugs at your lips, glad to have brought some sense of silly excitement to the Sanctuary.
You try not to show your shock as he brings you to his bedroom, making sure the door is locked behind you. You only take a few steps into the room before you stop and simply loiter there, watching as Negan sets Lucille down by the doorway to the ensuite before going inside. 
“Y’know there are no actual rules about impersonating so I don’t think you have the grounds to punish me” you attempt to defend yourself, setting your fake Lucille against the wall.
“Talking back won’t help your case,” Negan calls out.
You scoff out a laugh as you get distracted by his room. A part of you can’t help but wonder why a man like Negan would want half the things that litter the area: trophies from other people’s past glory, a vase, a houseplant.
“Yeah well, it’s just some fun, it’s—“ suddenly Negan’s there, right next to you with his gloved hand too close for comfort.
He cups your face, squishing your cheeks together as his other hand brings a wet cloth to your face.
“And get that shit off your face,” he does the job for you “my beard ain’t that fuckin’ bad”.
You stay quiet, not wanting the embarrassment of trying to speak with your cheeks squished and a cloth rubbing at your face.
Once he’s satisfied your face is clean, he simply drops the cloth to the floor. Negan looks down at your attire “Well hot damn, good news is my style is incredibly sexy… but no matter how hot you look, thanks to me, you know I can’t let your shit slide anymore, sweetheart”.
You frown, a challenging look in your eyes.
“I’m serious, you’re pissing off too many Saviors with the shit you pull,” he yanks off his scarf, letting it land on the couch “and now, with this, you’ve forced my hand”. 
Next, Negan takes off his leather jacket, inadvertently showing off some tattoos as he delicately places it on the back of his armchair. 
“You know I gotta give you some kinda punishment… but that don’t mean it can’t be enjoyable for the both of us” he continues.
The smirk on his face says it all. 
And just like that, it all makes sense. Of course he would bring you up to his bedroom and not to the cells when this is what he has in mind.
You shrug, some of your spirit returning in the form of a playful smirk “What? You gonna spank me?”.
“You want me to?” He unbuckles his belt and slowly pulls it through the loops of his jeans, the material hissing as it moves. 
Negan has never been a man to bluff.
You try to act nonchalant but you can feel your cheeks heating up. “Maybe,” you play it coy “will you iron off half my face even if I say yes?”.
Now it’s Negan’s turn to shrug. “That depends, this a trick or a treat?” he asks.
Normally you’re not this bold. Maybe leather jackets give people unlimited confidence? That seems to be the only solution as you walk over to his couch and place both hands on the armrest. You bend forward just enough for Negan to see your intent.
You glance back over your shoulder, your eyelids at half mast as you throw him a sultry look. Negan keeps his eyes locked on to yours, his boots heavy on the floorboards as he walks up behind you.
The leather of his glove growls as he places his hand on the centre of your back and pushes you down further. 
There’s no point in ignoring how your pussy throbs as he makes sure your head is against the couch cushions and your ass is up in the air, the armrest providing the perfect support.
“That's what I thought“ Negan praises, his hand slowly making its way down to your ass. 
“And I thought I was getting punished, not a yoga class” you goad.
Negan doesn’t hesitate. He doesn’t even wait or let the anticipation of his response build. He goes straight for it, smacking your backside hard enough to leave a handprint. 
A gasp leaves your lips, the sensation more stingy than it is painful. You have little time to prepare yourself as Negan wraps his belt around his hand.
“Just relax, baby,” he instructs softly, his tone in complete contradiction to his actions “and be grateful I’m letting ya keep your jeans on… for now”. 
Despite your thin layer of clothes acting as a barrier, the belt bites into your flesh. The sound of the belt whistles through the air before meeting your ass with a sharp crack. He does it over and over again, alternating between cheeks. 
You hiss at the sudden heat, your body clenching as the pain morphs into a dark, intoxicating pleasure.
“Well, damn!” Negan exclaims approvingly, momentarily stopping “you’re taking this like a trooper, ain’t ya?”. 
He pauses and you wonder if he’s waiting for a response. You swallow, your throat dry from the amount of gasps you’ve let out in such a short span of time. 
But before you can answer, you feel it. Not the belt. Not his hand delivering another slap. This time, it’s him; proud and unabashed as he brings his clothed crotch right against your ass. 
Suddenly, the belt didn’t seem too hard.
“I think it’s about time I see my work of art” he declares, pressing his hips forward to make sure you feel his entrapped boner.
For a man so brutal, Negan’s touch is gentle as his fingers glide around the waistband of your jeans. He lets his touch linger there for a few moments, waiting for your sign of approval. 
You’re well aware of Negan’s ego and how he wants to know just how badly you need him. He yearns to see that raw desire. As much as you want to banter back at him again, your brain fogs with need and you push back against him, your sore ass rubbing against his bulge.
He responses with a grunt as his hands slowly leave your waistband, too distracted to continue. Negan has something else in mind as he gives a slight tug of your hair, gesturing for you to stand upright.
You don’t even have time to turn to face him, your ass still snug against the tent in his pants as he roughly pulls you in for a bruising kiss.
His hand fists your hair, holding you in place as he devours you. Desperately trying to keep up, your breaths come out in short, sharp pants between desperate kisses.
Negan keeps his hand in your hair, using it to manoeuvre you away from his couch and over to the bed. The only time he takes his hands off of you is when the back of your legs hit against the soft bedsheets. 
The second you’re able, you take off your leather jacket, watching Negan follow suit as he begins shedding his clothes.
Your jeans are the worst to take off, the rough denim scratching it’s way across your sensitive backside as you quickly discard it. Once you get to your bra and panties, you stop, wanting Negan to take off the rest.
Negan doesn’t have the same sense of modesty as you, not stopping until he’s completely bare. Sitting back on the bed, you bite your lower lip and shamelessly dart your eyes across his body. 
The dark curls that cover his chest, the tattoos that scatter across his body, the happy trail of body hair that lead you lower, to where he stands erect and proud.
You gulp.
Negan joins you, kneeling on the bed in front of your body as he studies you. With a hum, he shakes his head. “No, this won’t do,” he tuts.
As the words hit you, a wave of self-consciousness washes over you. Whatever excitement that was evident in your face slowly drops away and you do nothing but blink up at him, waiting for Negan to continue.
“Yeah, I’m gonna want to fuck you in the leather jacket,” he elaborates “now that would be hot as all hell and I ain’t letting that jacket go to waste on my bedroom floor”.
You rolls your eyes as you let out a breath. “You fucking asshole” you huff, well aware that Negan was being vague on purpose just to toy with you. 
He chuckles, unable to deny your accusation. “Careful baby, you start insulting me like that and you’ll be getting another spankin” he threatens playfully, though you know he’s being serious. 
Negan leans down, almost hovering over you as his hands gently touch your bra straps. 
“But first, you got more layers to shed” Negan lets each strap fall to your arms before his fingers deftly work the clasp of your bra, the metal giving way easily. 
Without looking where it lands, Negan lets your bra drop to the side. You feel utterly exposed to his hungry gaze, watching as he drinks in the sight of you. 
A groan leaves him as he reaches out, his calloused hands gently cupping the weight of your tits. His thumbs brush over your pert nipples, making your squirm at the contact. 
“You going to play with my titties all day?” You question, hoping to spur him into action.
“It’s a punishment, doll,” he reminds you, bending to the side to pick up your leather jacket “if I decide all I want to do is stare and watch you finger that sweet little pussy till it’s raw, then that’s what’ll happen”.
“And is that what you want?” You ask, trying to maintain any self control you have. Part of you would actually apologize for your costume if it means getting his dick closer to your pussy.
“Nah, I want you to sit back and really think about what you did,” giving the jacket a quick shake, he spreads it out over your shoulder “think you can do that for me, darlin?”.
Making sure the jacket is secure over your shoulders, you adjust it to make sure your tits are still in view. “I guess I could try” you reply in a flirtatious tone, scooting back against the pillows.
“On the bright side, even though this is a punishment, I’m still a fuckin’ gentleman,” he says with a proud grin. 
You're quick to notice how his hands inch up past your thighs and towards your panties. Hooking a finger underneath them, Negan gives a slight tug “So I’m gonna need to loosen you up before I fuck you senseless”.
Narrowing your eyes at him, you gently lift your hips. That cocky smile never leaves his face as Negan slowly drags your panties down your legs. In an instant, they’re gone from view and end up on the floor alongside the rest of your clothes.
Negan’s eyes lock onto your core, unable to help himself as he reaches out and parts your folds.
“Fuck, you’re that wet already?” he says it like a question despite the answer being on his fingertips. You bite your lip as his fingers brush against your wet, swollen flesh. 
With a groan, Negan plunges two fingers into your warmth, scissoring them apart to stretch you out. You moan out, your back arching as he sets a steady pace. 
“Y-yes,” you gasp out when the pad of his thumb finds your clit “keep doing that!”.
Negan curls his fingers upward, targeting your g-spot. The look on his face is like a kid at Christmas, completely elated to have his fingers deep in your pussy.
He adds a third finger, pumping them in and out of you, listening to your moans and gasps to gauge how close you are. Leaning down, Negan meets your arched body and nips at your breasts.
His mouth brushes against your skin as he tuts “C’mon now, don’t tell me you’re about to cum already!”.
You nod frantically, hands clutching at the bedsheets “Yeah, yeah I’m ready, I’m gonna—“.
Negan chuckles darkly and before you can reach your high, his fingers slow their pace.
“Oh, I don't know about that," he pulls his fingers out abruptly and gives your clit a light tap with them "you haven't earned that privilege yet, baby". 
Your mind is in a haze as he licks his fingers clean, tasting you. It takes a few moments for your brain to compute what he’s denying you. 
“I…” you begin but you trail off, your throbbing pussy begging for release “Negan, please, I— I get it, ok?”.
His smile softens slightly and if anything, it only makes you more wet. “I know you get it now,” he agrees, bringing a hand up to cup your cheek “maybe, sweetheart, just maybe… if you beg nice enough, I'll let you cum on my cock instead”.
You take his words as a challenge. Throwing out all sense of pride, you babble on “Please! Y-yeah I just, I need you inside of me, please Negan, I’ll be good”.
Every word goes straight to his dick. 
Negan takes a moment to truly savour the sight of you begging and writhing under him, knowing this is some top notch jerking material he can use at a later date. 
"Now that’s what I like to hear" he praises, positioning himself between your thighs. He grips your hips and thrusts into you in one smooth motion, filling you completely.  
Even though the sudden stretch and fullness makes you feel breathless, you practically shout out “Negan!". 
He pauses but only for a moment, allowing you to adjust to his size. “Shhhhhhh,” he coos, his tone bordering on patronising “best be quiet before you wake up the wives, I’d hate to make those gals jealous”.
With a low groan, Negan begins to move, pulling back almost to the point of withdrawal before slamming into you once more. The leather jacket beneath you squeaks, each thrust pushing you further up the bed.
You can feel every inch of him, the primal yearning to cum on his cock sounding more and more appealing. Negan’s chest heaves as he labors over you, his body glistening as he works up a fine sheen of sweat. 
He doesn’t know where to look. His eyes dart everywhere, trying to take in each part of your body. Negan watches your face, the desperation to cum etched into each expression. Of course he watches your tits too, seeing them jiggle with each thrust he gives you. 
But his favourite part to watch is how well you‘re taking him. To see how your pussy welcomes each inch, letting him go flush against you every single time.
Bringing his gaze back up to your eyes, he pistons into you. “You’re close, I can feel it” he says with a clenched jaw, trying to hold off. 
“Please!” is the first word out your mouth followed quickly by a gasp as Negan goes for your clit again. His thumb rubs firm circles around the sensitive nub, sending shockwaves of pleasure through you.
You inner walls clench desperately around his cock and before you know it, everything crashes around you as you finally cum.
It’s as if your whole world blurs together and all you can focus on is his cock deep inside of you. 
Your pussy spasms violently around him, your vision whiting out as you moan loudly. Negan wants nothing more than to feel your sweet pussy throb around him but he knows he can’t hold off any longer. 
He quickly pulls out and thrusts into his hand to finish. His cock glistens with your juices before Negan unloads a thick load right onto your tits. 
You both pant, taking a brief moment to come down from your respective highs.
“Look at those beautiful titties,” Negan breaks the silence, admiring his handiwork “just when I thought they couldn’t look any better”.
Gently bringing a hand up, you run your finger along one of the lines he’s painted. “If I knew this is what the punishment would be, I would’ve pissed you off a lot sooner” you say breathlessly.
Negan hums as he flops down beside you, his eyes glued to how your fingertips play with his load. 
“Maybe you should’ve,” he replies “or maybe this is a sign that we should have some fun like this more often”.
You bite back your smile “Maybe it’s both?”.
“But y’know I can’t really just be going around screwing anybody and everybody,” he continues, making you pause, unsure where this is going “it’s bad for the image, y’know?”.
Your expression doesn’t change.
Negan takes in your confused look, trying to put the pieces together for you. “I mean, I don’t think the wives would appreciate me screwing around… unless, of course, I was screwing around with another wife…”.
“Oh”.
That’s all you feel as though you can say. A part of you immediately tries to rationalise this, trying to convince yourself that you’ve got the wrong end of the stick here. 
“Goddamn, did I really fuck you that hard?” Negan laughs “I’m asking you to marry me, baby, you should be jumping for joy right now!”.
You sigh, bringing your non-sticky hand up to your face “Negan…”.
“Negan, yes?”.
“Negan, I’m covered in your jizz and you’re seriously asking me this?! Now?!?” You exclaim. 
He stops for a moment, taking in your words. “Huh, ok, good point,” Negan grunts as he gets up, giving you a great view of his ass “I’ll go get some towels and you think about it, yeah?”.
Before you have time to reply, he’s walking into his ensuite “And I want an answer when I come back!”. He disappears into the adjoined room, turning on the light.
You lay back, allowing the pillows to practically consume you. The thought passes through your mind if only for a split second.
It wouldn’t be that bad to be yet another wife, would it? All you’d have to do is look pretty and have good sex… and never socialise with anyone else… and only be seen as one of his wives and nothing more.
You close your eyes, hoping that would prolong the impending decision.
Letting out a long sigh, you curse “Fuck”.
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withleeknow · 7 months ago
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lifeline.
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pairing: minho x reader genre/warnings: established relationship, fluff, hurt/comfort kinda?, slice of life?; unedited don't look at me lol word count: 0.7k listen to 🎧: lifeline - the rose note: weeeee it's been a good few months since i last wrote a plotless baby drabble so i might be rusty. in my head this is a companion piece to happy place :) wrote this v randomly bc i was in a mood lol
as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡
navigation / masterlist / ko-fi
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There’s a touch that Minho is familiar with, one that makes him drop whatever it is that he could be doing just to be there for you.
When your fingers dance across the back of his hand until you reach his wrist, wrapping your fingers around it so you could feel his pulse under your fingertips, he knows to take you into his arms and keep you there until you’re ready to let go.
It’s at the crack of dawn when you’ve just woken up from a bad dream, or in the middle of the dark, dark night when you’re plagued with bouts of uncertainty and your chest feels too heavy to fall asleep. Your hand tentatively traces over his pulse point, and Minho brings you closer, your legs tangled together in the sheets, his lips pressed against your forehead and his voice humming the melody of your favorite song.
It’s on the couch on a stormy evening, the room filled with the neverending patter of rain against the window, loud enough to drown out the trio of cats snoring in the background. You aren’t entirely there, your head is somewhere far away but you still absentmindedly reach for him, your thumb on the underside of his wrist. Minho lets you count the beats for a minute or so, before he pulls you into his lap, no questions asked. He tucks your face into the crook of his neck as he cards his fingers through your hair, gentle against your scalp, soothing when they rub the back of your neck.
It’s right before you both leave for a week-long trip with friends, when he’s hauling your suitcases to the front door but you tug him back by his wrist, and Minho knows that the airport can wait a few more minutes. He’s wrapping you up in his arms in an instance while yours wound around his neck, holding him flush against you as you breathe in his scent, your favorite in the whole wide world.
And it’s even when he’s putting groceries away that you come up to him from behind to hug him close. He rests his hands over yours where your fingers are securely fastened around his middle like a seatbelt, and you instantly untangle them in search of that familiar destination again. You press your forehead against the defined muscles in his back as you feel his pulse, beating steadily right under your thumb. A couple of minutes, it’s your little routine.
When Minho twists his body around in your hold to look at you, he scans your face for traces of discomfort, for any sign that you need him to ground you.
“Everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine,” you say with zero regard for the potatoes and onions that have been abandoned to roll around on the kitchen counter.
Then you’re guiding him down by the neck, a sense of urgency in your movement when you press your lips to his. He kisses you back just as eagerly, not wasting a single second as his hands find their rightful place on your waist.
You kiss him until you’re both breathless, until your cheeks are tinted with the rosiest shade of pink. When he opens his eyes, Minho finds you already looking up at him like you’re wonderstruck, your gaze doused in so much love that it proceeds to knock some more air out of his lungs.
“What was that for?” he manages to ask.
“Just… thank you.” You smile softly, nudging your nose against his before you press another quick kiss to the corner of his mouth for good measure. You’ve got more to say, he can tell.
The thing is, you two aren’t overly vocal about your affection for one another. He doesn’t have to tell you he loves you every hour of every day, and you don’t write him love letters like this is some kind of sappy romance novel.
What you lack in words, you make up for with actions, with an understanding that transcends the kind of love people often dream about. Whenever you search for him in your darkest moments, reaching for him and feeling his heartbeat against your fingertips like that is simply enough light to anchor you, to bring you back home, Minho knows that he’s your lifeline in every way that you are his.
And when you speak again after a brief moment, your voice gentle yet firm, he knows that it isn’t an exaggeration. He knows you mean it.
“I think you saved my life.”
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all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 08.09.2024]
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redvexillum · 5 months ago
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@peach-flavored-flambe I started this whole Flufftober/Kinktober journey as a way to challenge myself. Thank you for picking all the prompts for me this month. Thank you for always reminding me to write for ME and not for others. Thank you for being supportive of all of my writing since the day I entered this fandom. I know you are a fluff connoisseur so it's only right that I end this challenge with fluff - it is part Flufftober after all (and I wrote 24 smutty stories this month lol!)
TAGS: disgustingly fluffy, catastor, alastor is bad with feelings, alastor is in denial, touch starved alastor, ambiguously defined established relationship, alastor has a tail
✨️ This is a companion piece to Oblivious Love. A snapshot of a possible mini-series I may or may not write ✨️
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In another world, in another time, Alastor would have scoffed at the very notion of competing for anyone’s attention—least of all yours. And yet here he was, locked in a contest of affections with the most revolting, misshapen, red… thing. His lip curled in distaste. 
Competing? 
What a joke. 
He, Alastor, the Radio Demon, competing with… this? This mangy, misbegotten creature that you somehow, with all your boundless compassion, deemed to be a cat. His left eye twitched as he watched you coo at it, tenderly brushing your hand over its head. Every stroke made its misshapen ears flicker back before they sprung up again like hideous, overgrown weeds. 
The beast grinned up at you—a lopsided, almost maniacal grin—and Alastor cringed at its wide, vacant eyes. Eyes that pointed in opposite directions, adding an extra layer of stupidity to its already horrific form. And to top it all off, it wore some ridiculous monocle over one eye, like some half-wit caricature. Alastor's gaze narrowed on the creature’s absurd antler-like protrusion. 
How… befittingly obnoxious.
And then there was the name. 
Catastor. 
Of all the wretched things to call this freakish beast, you—and the rest of the hotel—had somehow arrived at Catastor, no doubt inspired by some misguided notion that this abomination had any resemblance to him. He huffed. The very idea. 
Just as he was about to enjoy a nice, quiet coffee break with you—his sacred time with his favourite person in all of Hell, uninterrupted and undivided—Catastor once again waltzed in, unannounced and unbothered. One garish screech later, and Alastor watched in slow motion as your attention shifted from him to… it. Your cooing started, that soft, adoring voice, while you scratched its revolting back, its purring filling the air with an infuriating satisfaction. 
Alastor’s grin tightened, his claws tapping rhythmically against his coffee cup, every nerve on edge. He imagined roasting the little beast, maybe flambéing it for good measure. Or perhaps he’d skip the cooking and just… devour it raw. 
It wouldn’t respawn. Unlike the sinners here, this little beast wouldn’t come back... 
...Actually, he wasn't entirely sure. It probably wouldn't come back. 
“Are you enjoying that, Catastor?” you murmured sweetly, eyes soft and radiant as you stroked it gently, letting your fingers glide down its back. Catastor’s eyes slowly drooped with bliss, purring loudly, completely absorbed in the luxury of your touch. 
Alastor’s claws tapped harder. Perhaps he would spare the creature for a little longer, let it feel a few more sunrises. But only for now, until he deemed the time right. 
He wasn’t jealous, of course. He’d never lower himself to something so trivial. No, he already had your attention. Compete? He smirked inwardly. He would never. 
“Dear?” Alastor called, his pride swelling as you looked up, your lovely smile still intact, eyes gleaming with interest as they settled on him. His heart raced—it always did when you looked at him like that, so openly, so innocently, as if he were your whole world. Clearing his throat, he kept his tone cheerful, even as he threw a disdainful glance at Catastor. 
“Your drink is getting cold, my dear. All this fuss over that… thing,” he muttered, lingering on the word with disdain as he quirked a brow toward the vile intruder. 
“Oh! That’s true!” you exclaimed cheerfully, scooping up Catastor with all the ease of picking up a damp noodle. The creature seemed to melt in your arms, his gelatinous little body sagging like all his bones had been dissolved into mush. His spine curved absurdly, draped over your arm like a ragged old towel, all while his purring grew even louder. You giggled brightly, an infectious sound that made Alastor’s ears twitch, and his eye give the faintest, most involuntary spasm. 
How smug, how terribly smug that little beast looked, he thought, like he’d won something. Alastor was positively certain that he could draw even more radiant laughter from you if he just had you to himself. 
But this… not-competing for your attention carried on. 
The next day, he found himself strolling around town by your side, his back ramrod straight, shoulders squared, as he recounted the latest juicy bits of gossip from Cannibal Town. Your expression was relaxed, attentive, and that quiet comfort in your eyes swelled a surprising sort of pride in his chest. 
“Oh, and don’t get me started on ol’ Frank here,” Alastor chortled, gesturing with his staff at a dilapidated little shop across the street. “Croaked in the last Extermination, poor fool! And now some hapless soul bought the building!” He pointed with glee just in time to see a young woman struggle with the door before it promptly collapsed on her head. He stifled a delighted laugh. “No one’s managed to run a shop there for nearly five hundred years! Imagine such a waste of souls….” 
“Aww, poor thing,” you murmured sympathetically, your amused smile softening. “Maybe you could help her out? Make her a deal?” you teased, a playful smirk lighting up your features, though your usual kindness still sparkled in your eyes. 
“Perhaps,” Alastor mused, softening his tone as the two of you strolled on. He did enjoy these quiet moments with you, wandering through the chaos of town. Ordinarily, he might have offered any other lady his arm with a bit of playful charm, but as his eyes drifted to your hand swinging casually by your side, he couldn’t help a ridiculous little thought from slipping into his mind. 
What would it be like to take your hand? To clasp his fingers over yours? He imagined the warmth, the softness of your skin and your hand would fit perfectly in his, as if made for him alone. 
The hum of Cannibal Town’s busy streets faded to a quiet buzz as Alastor fell into the silence. His gaze lingered on your hand for a moment longer, and then, in a rare, almost boyish impulse, he stretched out one gloved finger, brushing ever so lightly against the top of your hand. 
Immediately, his gaze darted to your face, but your expression remained calm, as placid as ever, lost in thought. The smallest curl of his grin softened as he looked ahead again, spine straighter than ever. 
A shuddering breath slipped past Alastor's lips. He had held other people’s hands countless times over the years—flirtations, deals, the occasional well-mannered escort—but this was… different. Strangely intimate. Vulnerable, even, which was absolutely absurd. He was over a century old, for heaven’s sake, not some fumbling schoolboy. It was just a hand, after all; he could chalk it up to nothing more than a gentlemanly gesture. 
So, after one fortifying breath, he steadied his gaze forward and reached out, his fingers inching toward yours. 
But… instead of your warm, delicate hand, his fingers closed around something smaller. And… hairier? 
Alastor’s eyes snapped down, and his lips clamped shut to suppress the hiss of static crackling in his throat. He gritted his teeth, trying to keep the shriek that wanted to escape from manifesting into the demonic roar his pride demanded. Because in his hand, instead of yours, was a limp, furry, noodle-like appendage. 
Catastor, somehow, had wriggled its way between the two of you and was now proudly extending its furry little paw into his hand. 
“Eugh!” Alastor recoiled, releasing the beast’s fuzzy limb with an audible cringe. 
You burst into peals of laughter, the sound bright and melodic as you greeted the cat with your usual warmth.
 “Catastor!” you cooed, scratching the creature’s head while it emitted a grating, delightfully hideous meow in response. Grinning up at Alastor, you said with a chuckle, “Look at us—a little family, walking around town like this!” 
Alastor’s grin tightened. “It looks nothing like me,” he muttered, only for the monocled beast to cast him a haughty, one-eyed glare. Under the hellish glow of the streetlights, its monocle gleamed almost smugly. 
“Oh, of course,” you replied simply, your laughter still dancing on your lips. 
His eye twitched as he entertained himself with the idea of cooking the cat into a jambalaya, rich and smoky. But no—that would be a small defeat, a concession that he was somehow competing with the fiendish little furball, which he wasn’t. 
Not at all. 
Yet, the relentless interference continued. Day after day, Alastor’s patience thinned. The little vermin seemed to have made it its life’s mission to sabotage every moment he tried to spend alone with you. He’d reach out naturally, aiming to rest a hand on your shoulder, only to feel the warm, slightly damp fur of the cat draped over your shoulder instead, as if it had some preternatural ability to stretch itself into his every gesture. 
Every time, he could imagine nothing less than punting the thing across the Petagram and sending it into the deepest layer of Hell. Yet, that urge would disappear the moment he heard your bright, amused laughter and saw your radiant smile. It was like you were some smile devil—any glimpse of your joy, and he lost all resolve to do anything that might bring you sadness. 
One afternoon, in the quiet shade of the bayou, Alastor stood by, his legs pulled primly together as he watched you lying in the grass. Your eyes were closed, a soft, contented hum escaping your lips as you lay there, bathed in the dappled light. The whole scene should have been picturesque: you, serene, the epitome of innocence and tranquility. 
But there was that hideous thing, sprawled over your chest like a satisfied pancake, purring loudly as if it had any right to bask in your affection. 
Alastor’s grin was wide, but his eyes were sharp, glaring daggers at the offending beast now lazing on top of you as if it belonged there. You, oblivious, kept humming, your hand stroking the cat’s fur in gentle, absent-minded sweeps. A perfectly peaceful scene, if not for the blob of red fluff ruining the picture by its very presence. 
One day, he mused darkly, one day that creature’s reign will end. But for now, he contented himself with standing by, watching the two of you in bemused, begrudging silence. 
The longer Alastor stared at that mangy little beast basking in your gentle touch, the more a unfamiliar itch settled in the back of his mind. He couldn’t help but wonder, just in passing—strictly passing, of course—what it might feel like if your fingers drifted through his hair instead, tender and deliberate. 
Not that he’d ever ask, of course.
It was merely… curiosity. 
Still, the cat’s purring only seemed to grow louder, practically vibrating with pleasure. Alastor's ears flattened, lying flush against his head as his grin grew tighter, his shoulders hunching slightly as his neck tried to disappear into his collar. He wasn’t jealous, nor was he competing with a wretched creature for your attention. 
He most certainly was not. 
His fingers drummed against his knee, the gentle tap-tap-tap a cover for how long it had been since he’d had time alone with you, just the two of you, enjoying each other’s company without any interruptions. To touch your shoulder, perhaps even feel your hand… in a gesture of camaraderie, of course. 
Yes, that cat really did need to go. 
“What’s wrong?” Your soft voice broke through his reverie, and he blinked, letting the darker thoughts slip away like shadows at dawn. 
Forcing a laugh, he pitched it into that usual two-tone cadence, rolling his eyes with practised ease. “Nothing’s the matter, dear, just basking in the peace and quiet,” he flicked his wrist with a dismissive flair, avoiding your gaze. 
You hummed thoughtfully, then suddenly mused aloud, “I wonder… is your hair soft?” 
Alastor’s eyes widened, his head snapping back to you with an almost painful creak. His heart thundered, warmth radiating through his chest in a dizzying surge. “That’s a rather odd question, isn’t it?” he replied, wincing as he heard the slight waver in his voice. His tail thumped softly against the marshy grass in protest. 
“Well, your son—” 
“He’s not my son,” Alastor interrupted quickly, unable to hide the slight flush in his cheeks. 
You grinned, a playful glint in your eyes, and Alastor found himself scooting just the tiniest bit closer. 
“Oh?” He let a wicked grin slip across his face. “So, you want to touch my hair, do you? It’ll cost you a steep price, my dear.” His eyes glowed with mock menace, and a low buzz of static crackled from his staff. “Perhaps… your soul,” he laughed darkly, the edge of humour softening his tone. 
You blinked at him before bursting into bright laughter. “What if I offer a massage instead?” You wiggled your fingers playfully. “Catastor seems to love it when I give him a little scratch behind the ears.” 
“Ugh.” Alastor rolled his eyes, crossing his arms with an exaggerated sigh. “That cat’s so starved for affection, you could probably kick it, and it’d still be purring like mad.” His grumble was almost swallowed up by his own embarrassment. 
There was a moment of silence as you watched him, a thoughtful look flickering in your eyes. Alastor stiffened under your gaze, nerves prickling as though you could see right through him. Then, with a bright smile, you reached out, your fingers splayed and wiggling in invitation. “You can be the judge then,” you offered with a grin, your hands open and waiting. 
Alastor’s gaze locked on your outstretched fingers, and as if guided by some irresistible, magnetic force, he found himself drifting closer, leaning in with a reverence that felt both foreign and sacred. He knelt just above your head, his eyes meeting yours in a soft, consuming stare, so near he could see the flecks of colour that danced within your gaze under the dim light. Slowly, carefully, he bowed, his face hovering just inches from yours, every breath mingling in the silence. 
His hair brushed against your cheek, and the contact brought a light laugh from you, your voice a murmur that warmed his every nerve. “That tickles.” 
He was entranced, utterly held captive by your closeness, by the way your lashes fluttered and your cheeks flushed. He’d never seen you this close before, and each tiny detail felt etched into his memory. “Well, go on,” he said softly, his tone dipped in a vulnerability he rarely allowed. “Show me if your massage is as grand as you claim.” 
A rush of warmth and satisfaction welled within him when he saw your own eyes flicker away shyly, your teeth worrying at your lip. You looked so endearingly flustered, as if realizing you and he were somehow alone in a bubble of time—just the two of you, no one else to intrude, no foolish cat.
Your fingers threaded delicately into his hair, and he surrendered, eyes slipping closed as he basked in the soft drag of your nails against his scalp. A shiver chased down his spine, and he released a soft, involuntary sigh, savouring every touch. He couldn’t remember the last time someone touched him like this—no, no one had ever touched him like this. 
Your fingers travelled over his hair, deft and soothing, with your thumb tracing small circles at the base of his ear. He shuddered, his tail swaying in a steady, rhythmic beat beside him, betraying just how deeply he was affected. 
“Good?” you asked, your voice barely a whisper. 
“Mmh.” His lips curled into a barely there smile, eyes still closed as he revelled in the feeling. “Passable,” he said, his tone rich with teasing. 
Your soft laughter flitted across his forehead, tickling his bangs and sending a delightful hum through his chest. He felt your breath, warm against his skin, each laugh another note of the melody he’d come to cherish. The gentle sweep of your thumb against his cartilage sparked waves of pleasure down his spine, and at some point, he’d eased himself down beside you, both of you lying on the cool grass, faces close as if drawn by an unspoken force. 
“You okay?” you murmured, your smile impossibly tender, amusement twinkling in your eyes. 
He met your gaze and found himself drinking in every detail. He liked your eyes, liked the way they softened as you looked at him. 
He liked your smile. 
But above all, he adored your laughter—the sound that seemed to strip away his defences and leave him feeling both exhilarated and exposed. 
A strange, quiet want flickered in his chest, something deep and hidden, something he hadn’t dared entertain. He wondered, just for a reckless, precious moment, what it would be like to move closer. Close enough that his breath mingled with yours, close enough that he could feel the warmth of your skin, maybe even let his lips graze yours. 
Just close enough… to be with you. 
Would such closeness chase away that cherished smile, rob him of the laughter that had grown to mean so much? 
As his thoughts drifted, your fingers slipped down his hair, tracing the line of his cheek. He could feel your fingertips gliding over his skin, tender and curious. Then came that small, enchanting giggle, a sound so sweet it echoed within him, lingering as if it were a treasure he’d never forget. 
Alastor could feel his heart beating a little too quickly as he leaned closer, drawn by the soft warmth of your touch. His face was just a breath away from yours, his lips so near your forehead, he could already imagine the gentle brush of a kiss. A kiss there would be innocent enough, right? Perhaps pressing his lips to yours would be too bold... but a tender gesture to your forehead surely wouldn’t be unwelcome. 
After all, this was for friendship—of course.
Just then, you sat up, leaving Alastor frozen, a pang of disappointment dropping like cold lead in his chest. But the ache melted away, replaced by a flash of heat, as you leaned forward, hair falling around him in a private curtain that made his breath hitch. Your smile softened, your eyes warm and unwavering, and then they closed, lashes sweeping delicately against your cheeks. Slowly, achingly slowly, you moved closer, and Alastor felt his pulse roar, filling his ears with a rush of anticipation. 
He could feel the warmth of your breath mingling with his, your fingers grazing his cheek as if the touch itself could tether him in place. A thrill he hadn’t realized he was longing for stirred within him. He closed his eyes, waiting, a tension brimming in his chest. His fingers trembled as he raised his hand, longing to close the last bit of distance, to touch you, to be as close to you as he’d been daring to dream. 
But then—“KAOUGH, KAOUGH, KAAAOUGHGHGHH!” 
A horrid, hacking noise broke through the moment like a thunderclap, snapping his focus away and shattering the spell between you. Instantly, Alastor’s warmth turned to ice as you jerked back, your attention stolen by none other than that wretched, blasted cat. 
“Catastor!” you exclaimed, startled, pulling away as the cat began to retch with ferocity. Alastor turned his gaze, annoyance brewing in his eyes, and found himself staring at the feline menace who was now coughing up dark, soot-like balls. These abominable little things, complete with tiny pointed ears and two unsettling, beady eyes, tumbled out of Catastor one after another, writhing and blinking as if they’d just spawned from a nightmare. 
“What the—” Alastor’s voice dropped, a disgusted snarl creeping into his expression as he watched the horrid little creatures emerge. Each ball of shadow looked like a poorly crafted miniature imp, malformed and twitching, with pointed ears and flickering eyes that seemed to leer at him. 
You, however, looked anything but disturbed. Stroking Catastor’s back in gentle, soothing motions, you cooed, “Aww, Catastor, did you eat too much again?” Your voice was filled with a doting affection, and Alastor watched in utter disbelief as the monstrous cat leaned fully against you, sprawling across your torso and letting its chin settle on your shoulder. 
“Yeeeeooowww,” Catastor moaned, an ugly, grating yowl that grated on Alastor’s every nerve. 
He gritted his teeth, feeling the rage simmering beneath his strained grin. The cat’s smug, hideous expression seemed to taunt him as it claimed your attention and care. Alastor could practically hear the mockery in its yowl. In his mind, he imagined various methods of removing this furred menace from your life—and more importantly, from his. 
But as he looked back at you, watching the way your eyes softened with laughter and your voice became gentle for this thing, the thought of that precious smile disappearing stayed his hand. Instead, he forced a tight grin, one that masked the bitterness eating at him from the inside, knowing he would endure—even if he had to suffer through a hundred more of those retched “yeeeooowwws.” 
"Aw, there, there," you murmured, gently patting the cat’s back with slow, soothing strokes. You looked at it as if it were some fragile, innocent creature, while the vile shadowy minions it coughed up scattered in all directions like troublesome spirits unleashed from a curse. 
Alastor could feel his patience fraying. With a quiet, heavy sigh, he sent out his own shadows, ruthlessly ordering them to snatch and crush every last one of the creatures scuttling about his beloved bayou. They obeyed, darting after the minions with deadly precision, each shadow winking out in a puff as they met their end. He folded his hands with a dark, calculated grace, but his gaze—his burning, dagger-sharp gaze—never left that insufferable cat. 
Oh, he saw it, all right. 
Saw the smug curl of its eyes, narrowing like crescent moons, and that infernal tongue hanging out, like it had the audacity to taunt him. Him. Alastor, the feared overlord, the Radio Demon. He felt something ancient and fierce coil in his chest, as if the essence of his full demon form threatened to break through, to remind this creature who reigned supreme. 
But just as his head tilted, shadows thickening around him with a promise of retribution, you turned toward him, drawing his full attention like a magnet. Your eyes softened, and a faint blush crept over your cheeks, spilling a fragile warmth he hadn’t anticipated. “Sorry about that, Alastor,” you said, your voice laced with sincerity, and as your gaze flicked downward, his anger dissolved just slightly, easing in the tender lull of your voice. 
Your next words undid him further. “Maybe tonight, we could read together?” You glanced up, offering a small, gentle smile that seemed to light the space between you both. “Just the two of us?” 
With those words, that insatiable, molten rage that had been brewing in his chest dissipated instantly, snuffed out as though you’d whispered the calmest of spells. 
He was sure of it then—you had to be a Smile Demon. How else could you possibly hold such power over him, capable of soothing his very soul with a single look? 
He gazed at you, awe mingling with amusement. Yes, you must be a demon of terrifying strength indeed—one who held him, the Radio Demon, in the palm of your hand with nothing more than a smile. 
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inthedayswhenlandswerefew · 2 months ago
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Cannibals [Chapter 9: Blue Jays and Red-Tailed Hawks]
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A/N: Thank you so much for your patience! Life got hectic but I am back, besties. Only 1 chapter left!!! 🥳❤️💙🦇
Series summary: You are his sister, his lover, his betrothed despite everyone else’s protests; you have always belonged to Aemond and believe you always will. But on the night he returns from Storm’s End with horrifying news, the trajectories of your lives are irrevocably changed. Will the war of succession make your bond permanent, or destroy the twisted and fanatical love you share?
Chapter warnings: Language, mentions of sexual content (18+ readers only), blood and violence and warfare, character deaths, chaotic giant lizards.
Word count: 5.5k
💙 All my writing can be found HERE! ❤️
Tagging: @themoonofthesun @chattylurker @moonfllowerr @ecstaticactus @mrs-starkgaryen, more in comments 🥰
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He reaches for his game piece, the shadowcat, although it isn’t purple but only a plain, crudely-carved chunk of oak wood, a makeshift imitation of its twin back in the Red Keep, assuming that Rhaenyra hasn’t stumbled upon and destroyed it. Daeron has sculpted the beast himself; he used a dagger that Aemond gave him as a gift before he was sent away to Oldtown, its hilt embellished with dark blue stones the color of Tessarion’s scales. He has made dice and a board too, and the other four pieces, homely little animals, proxies of his long-lost siblings. Daeron wonders if they miss him as much as he has always missed them. None of them ever said that in their letters, not in words so explicit. Aegon never really wrote at all; instead, he would scrawl barely-legible postscripts at the bottom of other people’s letters: Don’t drink too much, Learn some High Valyrian, Try not to get anyone pregnant.
“I am always the shadowcat,” Daeron explains, grinning. He shows the talisman to his companions, four soldiers fighting in the Hightower army, his closest friends. Then he places it at the starting line he has etched into the board.
“Why do you get the best one?” says Anthony of House Ambrose.
Daeron blinks. This has never occurred to him before. “Is the shadowcat the best piece?”
“Obviously.”
“I don’t know,” teases Josiah of House Roxton of the Ring, scratching his beard. “That butterfly is mighty fearsome.”
Now they’re all laughing. “Then you shall have the butterfly,” Daeron proclaims, handing it to Josiah. “That was my gentle sister Helaena’s piece. And you will never be as good as her, not if you pray to the Seven for a thousand years.”
“No,” Josiah agrees somberly, bowing his head in the firelight. It is just after dusk, and even here in the south, even within the cloth walls of the tent, the metallic chill of winter is creeping into every room like a vermin, like a spider or a rat.
“And Anthony, because you are clever yet envious and ever-grasping, I bequeath you Aemond’s wolf.” Daeron drops it into his open, calloused palm.
“I hope he doesn’t come looking for it,” Anthony chuckles. “I’m quite skilled with the sword, but I would be loath to meet the prince in combat.”
“I don’t want the worm,” slurs Oliver of House Fossoway of Cider Hall. Oli is quite drunk.
“It’s a snake, you idiot,” Josiah says.
“And it’s yours, Oli.” Daeron gives the tiny wooden snake to him. Oli accepts it reluctantly. “The snake was Aegon’s piece.”
“Long live the king!” Oli bellows with sudden fervor, and raises his cup of ale. Everyone toasts to the king’s health.
“Wherever he may be,” Daeron says before draining his cup and sweeping his silver hair out of his eyes, blue like a Targaryen’s, large and expressive like Mother’s. He feels that Aegon is still alive somewhere. He believes that if his eldest brother was dead, he would know it in his bones; there would be invisible, unbearable wounds like the ones that opened up when Helaena and Dreamfyre fell from the sky, days before Daeron received a raven carrying the news.
“What about my game piece?” asks Laurence of House Redwyne of the Arbor. He is a bowman and a healer as well, adept at herbal remedies and stitching. He would have preferred to be a maester or a septon, but as his parents’ only son he was compelled to endure the life of a lord. A squire arrives, refills all the cups with ale, departs with a swift bow.
“You are a Redwyne, and so you shall have Red’s bat,” Daeron says, entrusting the inanimate beast to Laurence. They know who he is talking about; they have heard more fireside stories of Daeron’s siblings than they could count. “And you are nothing like her. You are pious and poised, and you have never made your parents blush with shame. My Mother would have loved to have you for a son.”
“I’ll take your place,” Laurence says mildly, smiling. “You can be my parents’ dashing warrior, and I can accompany Queen Alicent when she prays in the sept.”
Daeron rolls first. He reads the dice and moves his shadowcat forward seven spaces. His brow knits together with determination. “I’m not leaving my mother there.”
“What? In the city?” Anthony asks, startled but not opposed. He is not one to shy away from battle. He believes that is where men find glory, where they ascend from mortals to something more, legends, heroes, gods.
Josiah snickers. “Not going to wait for Prince Aemond’s permission, huh?”
“The people of King’s Landing are in rebellion,” Daeron says, firelight flickering on his face. “Rhaenyra is desperate, and she is grieving Jace’s death, and she has my mother, Jaehaera, and Maelor in her grasp. What if Rhaenyra flees the city on Syrax and evades punishment for her treason? What if she executes my family, or if they are killed somehow when mobs overrun the Red Keep? I will not wait idly. Tessarion and I will recapture King’s Landing for the Greens.”
Oli raises his cup of ale again. “And we will fight with you!”
All five men toast, drink deeply, resume the game. Daeron wins; he has always been lucky.
~~~~~~~~~~
You stumble upstairs together, you supporting Aegon’s weight as best you can, tripping on the stone steps as lightning flashes outside the windows. Rain pours in sheets, wind howls through the cracked walls of the castle, and for a moment you think you are back at Heart’s Home, and that at the top of the tower you will find Luca waiting for you, safe and without pain and grinning his toothless little smile at you over Jace’s shoulder. Then—through the wine, through the torchlight and the thunder—you remember, and you feel the loss of them all over again, and when your knees buckle on the staircase Aegon drags you to your feet. You can sense that Alys Rivers is following you both, sweeping near-silently in her mossy green gown, peering fixedly with those strange silvery eyes like mirrors, haunting doorways and corridors. When you look back you catch glimpses of her, deformed shadows with long white fingers like the skeleton of a bat.
“I’m not a man anymore,” Aegon is blubbering as he collapses into his bed. His half-unbuttoned shirt is damp with spilled cider; tears gleam on his disfigured face.
“Shh, yes you are,” you soothe, lying down beside him. You rest a palm on his chest, gnarled grotesque scar tissue the color of a flayed man. Hazily, you think of the Bolton soldiers who must have marched south with Cregan Stark, and you wonder if when they sharpen their knives they are thinking of Aegon, or Daeron, or Aemond, or Mother, or maybe even you.
“I used to be,” Aegon sobs. “Now I’m just a useless, mutilated, flaccid freak.”
You burrow into him, drunk and drowsy. “Whatever you are, I’m glad you’re still alive.”
Aegon slings a scarred arm over your shoulder. Your ribs throb, your skull aches. “I used to love whoring,” he says miserably.
“The sport is not lost to you entirely. A working cock is not required to satisfy a woman.”
He laughs. “No, I suppose you’re right.”
“Perhaps you will recover. Perhaps you will find new ways to experience pleasure.”
“Perhaps,” Aegon agrees in a soft murmur, and then he dozes off.
And as the room spirals around you and thunder booms outside, you are carried back to other times and places, fleeting visions like the windows you once peered through into Aemond’s mind. You are a child being shoved into a wooden trunk and entombed there. You are tapping your little red bat around the game board. You are under the arbor grown over with roses and thorns, sunlight bleeding through the leaves in golden trickles. You are watching blue jays flit through a blue sky and bathe in the water of the fountains. You are playing with Jaehaerys, Jaehaera, and Maelor, building fortresses of stones and sticks, collecting seashells with them on the beach. You are catching your bats when they soar in through the open window to land in your palms. You are watching Aemond ride back from hunting with one of his red-tailed hawks still perched on his glove. You are feeling your mattress shift beneath his weight, his hand on your thigh, his teeth on your neck; you hear a reverent whisper of High Valyrian. And then you hear the blistering shrieks of all the people he has killed, and you are reminded of Mother’s words about what you once shared with him: It’s strange, and violent, and obsessive and profane and…and…unnatural.
Was she right? She must have been. All it has led to is suffering.
If I had never loved Aemond, Luca and Jace would still be alive. If I had married some ordinary nobleman like Mother and Grandsire always wanted—his bloodline an inheritance from the Andals or the First Men, not the treacherous smoldering embers of Old Valyria—my children would be safe, and Helaena never would have tried to escape King’s Landing, and Aemond would have wed a Baratheon girl and perhaps accepted Lord Borros’ offer of dinner and rest that night in Storm’s End, and maybe Luke wouldn’t have been killed over Shipbreaker Bay, and there is a chance the war would never have happened at all.
But you didn’t listen to Mother and Grandsire, because you have never been tame, gentle, dutiful, ladylike. Jace saw this clearly; you were hungry.
You don’t fall sleep until dawn, and when you wake it is night again. The maids bring food, bread and butter and stew thick with fish and crab, but neither you or Aegon want it. You are marooned here together, not useful like Aemond or Daeron, not holy like Helaena, and the only remedy is cider that flows like molten gold, heat that burns in your throat like the fire of a dragon.
Now there is bleak grey midday light streaming in through the windows, and Aegon is screaming downstairs. You sit up, startled and bleary-eyed, your tangled silver hair strewn carelessly all around you. Alys is standing beside the bed. You yelp in alarm when you see her.
“A raven has arrived,” Alys says tonelessly. She has a red ribbon laced through her moon-white fingers and is toying with it.
“What? Why are you in here…?”
“I think it’s bad news.” Then she floats to the doorway and turns back to make sure you’re following, her hand with the ribbon resting on her rounded belly.
At the bottom of the staircase, Aegon is writhing on the stone floor, a piece of parchment—doubtlessly sent by one of his loyalists on the mainland, one of the very few who know where he is now, perhaps somebody at Rook’s Rest or Crackclaw Point—crumpled in his fist. Several maids are trying futilely to comfort him. You take the letter from Aegon so you can read it.
What is written there in black ink is a tale of triumph and ruin. Under the cover of darkness the Hightower army marched on King’s Landing, and the smallfolk rose up to join them when the soldiers breached the city walls, and the capital has been retaken by the Greens and Mother freed from her cell. Ulf the White was found drunk and senseless, and promptly murdered. Silverwing fled from the Dragonpit in the midst of the chaos. Daeron and Tessarion flew directly to the Red Keep and attacked Syrax where she had been kept in the courtyard, killing the dragon and thus destroying Rhaenyra’s chance to escape. The woman the Blacks call queen was captured and imprisoned, and the men of her council executed; but not before her bowmen shot Daeron through the chest and throat and he tumbled from the saddle and died alone, bleeding to death within the castle walls he once called home. Tessarion screeched in grief and would not leave his body, incinerating the archers when they dared to shoot at her next.
It’s in your pounding skull, a memory that fills your vision, harsh and luminous like lightning: Daeron as a child moving his little purple shadowcat around the board, how the rest of you packed up the game and never played again after he was sent to Oldtown.
“He was supposed to wait for Aemond,” Aegon is sobbing. “He wasn’t supposed to try to retake the city alone, he knew that, he was just a kid…”
You see Daeron falling from the sky, riddled with arrows and stained red with blood. You see Helaena and Dreamfyre plummeting down towards the beach where you once played with her children. And then you see Aemond plunging into the Gods Eye and being swallowed up by cold dark currents, sinking to the floor of the lake, dissolving into silt, disappearing from history.
I love him, you realize, an abrupt and agonizing laceration down to the bone. I might hate him, but I love him too. And hasn’t it always been that way?
You feel the heat of blood drawn on your cheek, taste the iron and copper of it on Aemond’s lips. Your skull aches, always on the left side.
“Why are we the ones still alive?!” Aegon wails at you. “You and me and Aemond were the monsters. But Helaena and Daeron, they were good, they were pure, they deserved to be here when the war is over!”
“It’s not over yet,” Alys says ominously.
“Go away, witch,” Aegon moans, covering his face with his hands. “Go away, go away, go away…”
Outside where soft rain is falling—you can see droplets on the windows and endless opaque fog—you hear the distant snarl of a dragon. And you have the overwhelming sensation that you are being called to.
Above the Gods Eye, the red and the blue, Alys had said. Aemond was blue…but who was red? Caraxes, Daemon, me?
The dragon growls again, not Sunfyre or Grey Ghost or Vermithor the Bronze Fury but the Cannibal, never ridden, never tamed, always hungry. Alys Rivers is holding something out to you. It is the red ribbon.
“He flies to his death,” she says levelly. “Unless you are there to catch him.”
Luca and Jace are gone. Helaena and Daeron are gone. Jaehaerys and Grandsire are gone. But I don’t have to lose Aemond too.
You take the ribbon and swiftly weave your hair into an untidy braid, then tie it off at the end with the strip of red. It is the first color besides black you have worn since you left Heart’s Home. Then you pad towards the castle entranceway in your bare feet.
Aegon is sniffling as the maids try to console him. He peers up at you from where he is still collapsed on the floor, a heap of marred skin and weak bones. “Where are you going?”
In answer, the Cannibal roars outside, immense and gravelly and malevolent.
Aegon says again, frantic now: “Red, where are you going?”
“To claim a dragon.”
“You can’t,” he says, stunned, petrified. “They all refused you.”
“I’m a different person now.”
“No!” he shouts as you turn to leave, lunging and wrapping his arms around your legs, trying to keep you here. “Please don’t go. Please stay. I don’t want to lose you too.”
Tenderly, you touch his tangled locks of silver hair, his mutilated cheek, his slumped shoulder. “If I don’t go, you might lose all of us.”
“It’s suicide. The Cannibal can’t be ridden.”
“But I know what he craves,” you say, and from across the room Alys smiles at you, her pale eyes glinting and her hands stroking the small globe of her belly. “And I want the same thing.”
You pull away from Aegon and escape into the mist, the rain, the cold wind and sea spray that burns in your lungs. He hobbles after you with his walking stick, pleading for you to stop, but he is too slow to catch up. Behind Aegon, Alys trails at a distance, meandering over the rocks. The magma trapped beneath the surface of the island flows like scorching blood through the arteries of the earth; the heat radiates up through the soles of your feet. The marrow glows hot and red in your bones.
You follow the Cannibal’s grunts and snarls and find him down by the water, a shore of jagged volcanic rocks and no sand, volcanic glass, fury hardened and cooled. But yours is still fresh. The Cannibal is feasting on the corpse of Grey Ghost. Gore hangs in crimson shreds from his craggy teeth; he has too many of them, they grow in rows like a shark’s. Frothing seawater laps at his claws. He raises his massive head—black scales and barbed spines, mindless primordial eyes green and luminous—and growls, steam rising from his flaring nostrils.
Fear strikes you, sharp and sudden. Your hands and knees are trembling.
“Let’s go back to the castle!” Aegon yells over the sounds of the sea and the gales of wind.
But you can’t stop now. The Cannibal called and you answered. And here, eighteen years late, you will have the dragon you were denied from birth.
You speak in High Valyrian as the wind gusts and rakes, your black mourning gown billowing, strands of silver hair ripped from your braid. “You hate your kind,” you say to the Cannibal, showing him the empty palms of your hand as you approach, cutting your bare feet on the rocks; and he watches you, eyes blazing, fangs revealed. “And I do too. I hate Rhaenyra for ordering the deaths of Helaena and Daeron and Grandsire. I hate Daemon for sending assassins into my home to murder Jaehaerys. I hate Aemond for killing Luca and Jace. And I hate myself for not being able to stop any of it.”
The Cannibal roars and his jaws open wide, revealing a gaping blood-red throat. From deep within him, lethal flames are building.
“I told you!” Aegon is shouting. “He can’t be tamed, get away from him! Red, come back, please don’t die, please!”
“I was weak!” you scream at the Cannibal in High Valyrian, stumbling over the rocks as you move closer. You bare your teeth at him like you did to Jace the night Rhaenyra took King’s Landing. “I was useless without you. I tried to forget my inheritance as a Targaryen, but it found me. It found me in the Vale, it found me as my son died in my arms. I cannot be gentle and toothless. I can only be the blood of the dragon.”
The Cannibal snaps his jaws shut and stills, his green eyes alight and fixed on you. Aegon and Alys say nothing; perhaps they are afraid to break the spell. You reach out and press your hand to the Cannibal’s muzzle; it comes away covered with Grey Ghost’s blood. You drag your tongue up the length of your palm and drink it. Dragon blood tastes like metal and smoke and the verdant rot of a swamp. The Cannibal growls from low in his enormous chest, but now his radiant eyes are curious.
“Help me kill Daemon and Caraxes,” you say as the wind howls and raindrops run in rivulets down your face. You place both hands on the Cannibal’s bloodied muzzle now. “You’ll kill your kind and I’ll kill mine. Together we will consume them. And I swear to you, my hatred burns every bit as hot as yours.”
You show the Cannibal, picturing it in your mind and knowing he can see: Aemond confessing that he murdered Luke, blood spurting when Jaehaerys was decapitated, Helaena and Dreamfyre crashing down to the beach outside the Red Keep, Jace lying dead in a crumbling stairwell, Luca’s blanket spotted with scarlet and his cries going silent, Daeron pierced with arrows, Aemond disintegrating in the depths of the Gods Eye if you cannot save him.
“I have all this hatred and no way to satisfy it. Let’s fly. Let’s devour.”
The Cannibal wears no saddle and never has. He is wild, and even now you will never own him. What you share will aways be a fight, a push and a pull like the tides, brutal and beloved, but isn’t that how you like it? You move to his side, wading in the shallow water on the shoreline, and hook your fingers around the spines that jut out of his thorax like thorns. His scales gleam like obsidian; he snorts tendrils of searing steam. He does nothing to help you, not stooping lower to the ground, not nudging you along with his snout as you’ve seen Sunfyre do for Aegon. The Cannibal only looks to Grey Ghost’s tattered corpse and takes another bite, crushing the ribcage between his jaws, ropes of gristle and deflated pink lungs gulped down.
Faintly, you hear Aegon say as he whirls to Alys: “Seven hells, I think it’s working.”
You heave yourself upwards and climb until you reach the Cannibal’s knobby spine, and nothing hurts, not your head or your ribs or the cuts on your feet or the scar that begins at your collarbone. As you are still searching for good spots to grab onto so you don’t slide off, crawling over the terrain of his back like stones, the Cannibal jolts forward and you scream when you nearly tumble head-first off of him and into the ocean. You grapple for purchase, eventually finding several large spines near his shoulder blades. You grip these thornlike appendages—your hands are too small to close around them completely—and now the Cannibal is diving into the Narrow Sea.
Aegon shouts something you can’t decipher, and then you are underwater and the world outside is muted. The ocean is ice cold and thrashing violently with the force of the Cannibal’s movement, and you hold on with your eyes squeezed shut, the currents wrenching you roughly, waiting for the dragon to resurface. But the Cannibal plunges deeper and pressure builds in your ears until it feels like they will rupture open and hemorrhage.
Is he trying to drown me??
You consider releasing his spines and paddling blindly for open air, but that would be a surrender. You would be unworthy. You would have no dragon. And the Cannibal would devour you like he did Grey Ghost.
You think in High Valyrian as loudly as you can: I will die here before I let go. I am not afraid of the afterlife. Half of my family is there already. Jace is rocking Luca in his arms, Helaena is placing ladybugs in his tiny wrinkled palms, Daeron is telling him that I’ll be home soon.
And then the Cannibal ascends, and through your eyelids you can tell there is light again, and he bursts through the surf and onto a rocky beach. He scrabbles over the ground, you lurching and blinking seawater from your eyes. The Cannibal’s black wings, ragged from battling other monsters, open like the wings of a raven or a bat. You peer down and the island is growing smaller and the wind is forceful, the ocean rippling under the gusts from the Cannibal’s wings.
You look over your shoulder, and for only a moment you glimpse Aegon standing on the shore and cheering, waving, whistling, and Alys watching with a smile. Then the Cannibal banks and carries you higher into the grey clouds. The air is frigid, and you can’t see anything through the fog, but you are grinning as the wind stings on your teeth. At last, you know what it is like to fly. Dreamfyre bonded to the gentle, Vermithor to the powerful and ambitious, but you were made for a different sort of beast. Your dragon is hateful. Your dragon is hungry.
The Cannibal circles back to Dragonstone, breaks through the sightless mist like a blade through flesh, and lands beside Aegon and Alys and snarls at them, gnashing his gore-stained fangs. Steam blasts from his nostrils and blows through their hair. Alys shrinks away from him, her hands cradling her belly protectively.
Aegon is laughing hysterically. “What now?” he says, marveling at the Cannibal, awed and horrified in equal measure. “All these years you thought there was something wrong with you. Thank the gods your egg never hatched.”
“Aemond is meeting Daemon in battle above the Gods Eye. That’s where I’m going.”
“Do you even know how to get there?!”
“It’s west of here. That’s a start.” But you see a mirage through the Cannibal’s ancient green eyes: a time years ago, decades, centuries, when he flew over the Riverlands and felt the foreign magic of the Old Gods, natural adversaries to Valyrians. He flew away from them then. He can find his way back now.
In High Valyrian, you think: Take me there and we will kill our own.
Yes, an ancient voice rumbles in your skull, wrathful black bottomless gluttony. Yes, yes.
~~~~~~~~~~
It gleams like a sapphire in the face of the earth, the Gods Eye as you descend through dense clouds that taste like metal when you breathe the winter sky into your lungs. You have flown through the night, and you both would be exhausted if not fueled by hatred the way wood feeds a fire.
The Cannibal shows you things through his archaic reptilian eyes—the Targaryens arriving on the doorstep of his lair after heeding Daenys the Dreamer’s vision of the Doom of Valyria, Aegon’s Conquest and Visenya’s scheming, Maegor the Cruel’s ashes being interred on the island where he was raised, the Old King Jaehaerys fleeing with Alysanne to Dragonstone so they could marry against the wishes of his advisors, Rhaenyra and Daemon’s wedding and happiness there before the war began, dragons coming and going, storms and eruptions and shipwrecks, claws and fangs and raw meat—and so you learn what it means to be a dragon. You show him your comparatively few memories in return, your momentary existence, and he begins to understand you too.
The dark skeletal remnants of Harrenhal, promised to Alys and the son she shares with Aemond, appear as the Cannibal flies lower. On the fields by the lakeshore, armies are clashing in battle; you see the banners of House Stark, House Lannister, and the dual factions of House Targaryen. High above the murky blue water, Vhagar and Caraxes are twisted in lethal combat, flames pouring from their jaws, claws scraping away scales.
Aemond, you think, and you wonder if he has already felt that you’re here.
The Cannibal glides with his vast, frayed wings over the Green soldiers, and you spot Criston among them, astride a galloping white horse and wielding a sword. He stares up as the Cannibal’s shadow falls over him, and he sees what you have brought with you, and he is so staggered he cannot look away. Men are pointing and shouting. The Northmen are pulling up their horses, their infantry bolting for the trees. In front of you are thousands of enemy combatants, anonymous and swarming like ants.
“Dracarys,” you whisper, and the Cannibal opens his jaws and spills a river of fire down on the Northman. Their banners burn, their horses scream and scatter, their men are cooked in their armor and stumble towards the water to extinguish themselves. You feel the Cannibal’s malevolent satisfaction. He feels your hatred turning lighter, anemic, easier to carry.
He swoops up into the sky where Vhagar and Caraxes are intertwined. Vhagar has the Blood Wyrm’s long, serpentine neck clenched between her fangs, but Caraxes is not dead yet; he has clawed through the scales of Vhagar’s belly and opened her, unspooled her, disemboweled her. Vhagar’s intestines cascade from her abdomen and tangle around her kicking feet. She is bleeding to death. She will fall soon.
Daemon knows there is no escape. He has Dark Sister in his fist and is preparing to jump from his saddle and deliver the deathblow to Aemond. You remember Daemon stalking you around the courtyard of the Red Keep with the same sword, twirling it in his hands and fantasizing about slitting your throat. The Cannibal understands this as if it is his own memory and unleashes crimson flames upon Caraxes. In his final seconds, Daemon turns and sees you, and the last thing he feels is not triumph but shock and heat and excruciating, incinerating pain, a fire that burns ruinously clean, leaving not even the bones.
Vhagar is dying. She releases Caraxes and the smoldering, broken dragon tumbles resistlessly into the lake. Aemond is calling your name. The Cannibal soars towards them, almost close enough now. Vhagar goes limp as she exsanguinates, her wings stop flapping, her colossal body spirals down towards the Gods Eye. Aemond unfastens his chains and leaps from the saddle. It is his only chance; if he hits the water with Vhagar, he will be knocked unconscious and drown, sink, vanish. His long hair is a ribbon of silver. His hands grasp for you and the Cannibal, catching nothing but empty air.
You reach for him as he falls and the wind rushes through your fingers, grey as steel and cold like the descending winter.
~~~~~~~~~~
A year ago, twilight in the garden of the Red Keep, the fountain trickling lazily as you perch on the edge with Blue Jay clinging to your forearm. High above, silver glints of constellations are burning through the indigo sky. On the ground, you kick pebbles around aimlessly with your bare feet. You avoid his gaze because you’re trying to pretend you’re teasing; you don’t want him to see how upset you are. “They’re going to make you marry a Baratheon girl.”
“No they aren’t.”
“Yes, Aemond, they are. I understand that. You don’t have to lie to me.”
“They’re going to try,” he purrs into your ear as he sits down beside you, petting Blue Jay with one lithe hand. “But I won’t do it. If Borros Baratheon needs a marriage to seal his alliance, then Daeron can wed his youngest daughter. I’ve already written to Daeron, and he agreed. He was willing, in fact. If it means he would be coming home to King’s Landing at last.”
“Lord Baratheon will want you,” you insist. “You are older. You are closer to the throne.”
“I’m very close to it,” Aemond agrees, kissing the apple of your cheek and then biting you there, the sharpness of his teeth, the pink warmth of bloodrush. Blue Jay swoops off into the dusk to devour the wheeling white specks of moths and lacewings.
“He will try to tempt you, he will offer you a beautiful bride.”
“Oh, yes, she will be beautiful,” Aemond murmurs, and when you strike at his chest he catches your wrists and yanks you in closer. “And she will be meek, and compliant, and ladylike in every way, and if she was mine she would lie down and spread her legs for me whenever I asked, because that is what is required of a dutiful wife. She will be devout…and decorous…and sinless…”
“Then marry her instead,” you hiss as you battle with him, fighting to get away, not wanting to win. Aemond drags you off the ledge of the fountain and into the cool shallow water. You splash as you struggle, your fingernails raking against his throat and the blind side of his face where he can’t see to defend himself, your long silver braid heavy and sodden, your blood-colored velvet gown drenched and clinging to you like muscles to bones.
“But the Baratheon girl wouldn’t be like me,” Aemond says, grabbing your jaw and forcing you to look at him, and while his hands are rough his voice is soft, almost like a whisper, almost like the prayers that Mother sighs in the sept, pleading for the gods to tame her children. The thrashing water goes still. Your heartbeat is slowing. You gaze into the crystalline blue of his eye and are trapped there like a sailor sinking to the bottom of the sea. “And she wouldn’t be like you either.”
You grin—relief, triumph, hunger—and Aemond kisses you, not like how a lord kisses a lady but how animals devour each other, fierce and biting, insatiable, unashamed.
Aemond says as he kneels in the water of the fountain, bats you named after him flapping overhead in a darkening sky: “I have to leave for Storm’s End at dawn. I won’t be gone long, I won’t sleep there even if I’m invited too. Wait up for me tomorrow night.”
“No,” you answer, taunting him; but you will.
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nolita-fairytale · 2 years ago
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give you my wild, give you a child | carmen 'carmy' berzatto x pregnant fem!reader oneshot
summary: your second trimester while pregnant with baby bear is way sexier than you expected.
warnings: smut, breeding kink, language, 18+ only, barely proofread.
word count: 3.7k
a/n: hi it's me with the second trimester sexapalooza smut i promised @starbritestarlite and @carmensberzattos. and with this new season, let me know if you want to be added to my carmy taglist!! i wrote this as a companion piece to the 'make my heart heart surrender' universe, specifically for the 'carmy as your baby daddy' headcanon/social media au series. anyways, i've been thoroughly enjoying season 2 and am sitting into the fact that i've created my own universe inside of their universe. god we love fanfic. anyways... this is nsfw so 18+ only.
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Today 2:21 pm
Carmy “my baby daddy” Berzatto: On the way home for lunch. 
You: Hurry, baby. 
Carmy “my baby daddy” Berzatto: You good, sweet girl?
Your reply is almost instant, and Carmy wonders what could possibly come next as he sees the three dots appear below your message, indicating that you’re still typing. 
It’s a link, his eyes widening as soon as it appears in his iMessage history with you. 
You: Hottest Sex Positions For Pregnant Women | Cosmopolitan 
Before he can notice that it feels ten degrees hotter in the room, that his face has turned cherry red, that his pants are beginning to feel unbearably tighter, he’s interrupted by the sound of a familiar voice. 
“You good, chef?” Marcus asks, as he passes by, noticing the red tones that have risen to Carmy’s cheeks. 
“Wh-, oh yeah!” Carmy answers, almost too quickly, as if he’s been caught doing something he shouldn’t be doing. 
Marcus shoots him a strange look, examining his boss’ face. 
“Just uh… gotta go home for lunch.”
*
3:03 pm
“What took you so long?” you practically growl as soon as Carmy gets through the door. 
He hasn’t even had a chance to close it properly before you’re on him like a moth to a flame. Dressed in the cutest pair of white shortalls, you’ve been working from home all day – or rather, mindlessly clicking through your e-mail while waiting for Carmy to come home all day, your mind preoccupied with the fact that Carmy hasn’t been home to give you exactly what you want. 
What you need, may be the better description. 
It’s as if the spirit of Eros himself has taken you over, unable to focus properly as your rapidly changing body needs is practically screaming out for one thing and one thing only: 
To be properly and thoroughly fucked by the man that got you here in the first place. 
“I-,” he begins, attempting to explain that he was running a little behind and got caught up giving feedback to one of his new line cooks before your mouth is on his in an all-consuming kiss. 
Now that he’s here, you regret even asking him, careless for the why when it feels this good to have him pressed up against your body. Your lips are desperate, hungry, intense, as you tangle yourself into him. It’s as if you can finally relax, like you can finally take a breath, now that your husband is finally here. 
He lets out a little groan of surprise against your mouth, as if you’ve charged towards him like the sexual equivalent of a tasmanian devil. 
And in his defense, you have.
“Baby,” he whispers against your lips. “Should we-, can we even-, shouldn’t you be working?”
He’s not wrong. 
You should be working. 
But the unbelievable and insatiable need for sex – for sex with Carmy – is the only thing driving you these days, holding you hostage to its unbelievable and all-encompassing power. You’re like a woman possessed as you reluctantly pull away from him to put his mind at ease. Your lust-filled eyes look him over, his curls already wild from a long day at the restaurant, as you shake your head ‘no.’
“I finished all my work for the day and signed off early. Perks of being a start-up sellout,” your well-kissed lips inform him. 
Carmy’s head spins in response to your answer.
Maybe it’s the prospect of the sex. 
Maybe it’s the way it’s the way your mouth feels against him as you kiss down his jawline and his neck.
“Okay, but I gotta be back at the restaurant at 4:15,” he smiles in agreement, more than happy to oblige.
“That’s plenty of time,” you coo, nibbling on his earlobe.
This time it’s Carmy who initiates, using both of his hands to cradle your face before his mouth is over yours again. The kiss starts slowly this time as he inhales deeply, taking you in. You shift closer, pressing your slightly-rounder-these-days belly against his body once more. He moans, his hands immediately traveling down your body, to your hips as he breathes you in again, wanting nothing more than to stay like this with you forever. His touch ignites something in you and you allow yourself to surrender, lost in the feel of his hands against you. His hands are everywhere – your hips, traveling up your belly, dancing across your fuller-than-normal breasts – and finally the drawn-out unrest of your mind can finally find peace.
He’s starting to get used to this. 
And he’ll admit that he really, really likes it. 
Carmy changes positions with you so that he can press you up against the front door as you continue your passionate makeout. 
Your first trimester had been hell – mornings spent on the bathroom floor together while you hurled the contents of your stomach into the toilet, days where you barely had the energy to get out of bed, nights where you were too hot to sleep that all you could do was lay on the cold tile of the bathroom floor, frustrated tears pouring out of the corners of your eyes – your body undergoing the hardest reset of your life. 
So when the fog and tumultuousness of your first trimester subsided, it was a more than welcomed change – and in so many ways. You’ve traded mornings of flat ginger ale, saltines, and sympathetic back rubs, with mornings spent tugging on Carmy’s perfect curls while you cried out his name.
“You smell like sandwiches,” you giggle in between kisses. 
“Ah shit. I should shower,” he sighs, reluctantly. 
He knows your sense of smell has been heightened lately, and he can’t imagine that smelling like a spicy Italian sandwich would be much of a turn on for you. He begins to pull away, but there’s now way in hell you’re letting him go as you grab his hands in yours. 
"No, Carmy, I can't wait,” you whine, the sound of your voice the most needy, beautiful thing Carmy’s ever heard in his life. 
“You could join me,” he offers with a raise of an eyebrow, presenting a solution you can absolutely get behind. 
“Uh huh. Yes please,” you nod eagerly, a girlishness to the way you answer him. 
Please.
Your usage of the word’s got him harder than a rock and he loves this side of you. Your sex life had been great before the pregnancy, but there’s something different about it now. Something about how needy you’ve been – the only thing that can possibly quell the fire inside of you being him – has him unraveling at the seams. 
How could he possibly say no when he’s more than eager to give you exactly (and then some, if it’s up to him) what you want? 
Your fingers are still tangled in his, licking your lips as you add, “My baby daddy thinks of everything.”
Carmy shakes his head, tugging at your hands as he leads you towards the bathroom, mentioning that he still can’t get over the fact that you’ve chosen to call him that in front of everyone you’ve ever known. You remind him that it’s cute, and though he’s not sure he gets it, he lets you do it anyway because it makes you happy.
As you both reach the bathroom, you patiently wait as Carmy turns on the shower, running a hand through the stream of water to check the temperature. One minute he’s focused on the cool water coming down from the showerhead, and then next he’s caging you in between his body and the bathroom sink. 
“You miss me this much, pretty girl?” he murmurs dreamily, his hand trailing up your inner thigh. 
You nod, taking note of how perfectly his top lip fits in between yours. 
“Yes, baby. Thanks for coming home for lunch,” you manage to get out, in between desperate kisses. 
“No need to thank me,” he smirks, a newly-found confidence in his voice. 
His hands are tugging at the hem of your shorts, as if he could slide the overalls down your body this way, a small pang of frustration welling deep in his stomach as he realizes that’s not going to happen. He kisses you with a fervor that makes you dizzy, as Carmy fumbles with the straps of your overalls. Trying his best to unclasp one side, he tosses the strap over your back, a clang sounding out within the four walls of the small room as the metal of the claps hits the porcelain of the sink. 
Carmy lets out a groan as he tugs at the second strap, causing you to giggle. 
“These stupid things,” he huffs, a look of embarrassment running through his brilliant blues. 
“Here, baby,” you say, slipping one of your arms out of the tangled strap. 
He groans as soon as his eyes meet yours again, more than happy to help you out of these damn things.
He pulls the overalls down with a rigor that stops right as the overalls drop to your waist, revealing your white tank top – one that you’re not wearing a bra underneath. 
“Sweetheart,” he groans, his hands ghosting over where your nipples stand erect against the fullness of your breasts. 
“You been like this all day?” he mutters against your skin, leaning down to drag his mouth over your still-clothed breasts. 
“Mmmmhm. Needed you,” you moan, your eyes closing as you lose yourself in the pleasure he’s giving you. 
He’s so incredibly hard right now it’s not even funny. 
“Yeah?”
By the time you open your eyes again, Carmy’s on his knees, so gentle, so tender with the way he slides the rest of the piece of clothing over the bump that’s been growing inside of your belly.
“Yeah,” you confirm. 
You shimmy out of your overalls as Carmy jumps back to his feet, removing your tank so that the only thing you have left is the pair of panties you’re still wearing. Before he can kiss you again, you’re tugging off his shirt, a sacrifice, an offering to the bathroom floor. 
“Should be warm enough, yeah?” you ask, gesturing towards the shower. 
“Yeah,” he agrees with a nod, removing his shorts. 
You feel all the blood in your body rush south as you see how hard he is already, swallowing hard. Carmy helps you into the shower, like the gentlemen he is, and you hope that’s where the gentleness ends. 
Before you can say anything else, he’s pulling you towards him, wrapping one of your legs around his waist as the warm water begins to wash over the both of you. 
“I’m so sorry, pretty girl,” he hums as his nimble fingers slip between your legs. He groans as soon as he feels how goddamn wet you are. 
“Fuck, honey.”
“See? I told you I needed you, Carm,” you pant, letting out a high keening moan as he draws lazy circles around your clit. You’re already bucking your hips into his hand and he’s barely started touching you. 
"You're so sensitive. So responsive, sweet girl,” he teases you, as he drags his fingers through your folds. You are so unbelievably wet that he’s not sure how he managed to get so damn lucky. 
"I just want you to fuck me, Carm. I’ve needed it all day. I need you to make me feel good," you beg, completely lost in the way his fingers feel as he slides two into you already. 
It’s like his touch sets fireworks off in your brain, setting your nerves on fire as you cry out. 
"Yeah?” he taunts you, an almost amused tone in his voice as he sets the slowest rhythm. “Think that’s how we got here in the first place, pretty girl.”
"I know,” you whimper, moving your hips against his fingers for any kind of friction. For something more. For something faster. For something deeper. But at this rate, with how much he seems to enjoy teasing you, with how horny you are, you’ll take anything. 
“But nothing feels as good as you, Carm.”
Your words go straight to his dick and he’s not sure he’ll ever be able to leave you alone ever again – might as well quit his day job in exchange for this all-day never-ending second trimester sexapalooza you both seem to be caught inside of. 
He’s practically choking on his words as he manages to ask you:
"What’s that, baby? Did you touch yourself while I was gone?" 
You nod pathetically, moaning as he buries his thick fingers deep inside of you. He pauses, feeling the way your walls pulse around him as he stays inside of you, wanting to memorize this moment forever. 
In any other circumstance, he’d make you fall apart on his fingers, and then his tongue before you even went there, but with your recent admission, he’s decided that he has to have you now. In one swift motion, Carmy pulls his fingers from you, releasing his grip on your leg, eliciting a whine at the loss of him. 
Before you can even protest, he’s turning you around in the shower, and you can feel his hard-on pressing against your backside as he pulls you close.
“Sweetheart, you can’t just say things like this,” he taunts you, playfully, as he drags his cock through your folds a few times. 
“Carm,” you whimper, bracing your hands against the shower wall. “Don’t tease.”
“What’s that?” he coos, pressing his thick tip against your clit. 
“I don’t think I can take it. Please, baby,” you whine, so desperate for him to be inside of you. You push your ass back against him, offering your body to him for the taking. 
“Fuck!” he grunts out, because he just can’t resist you like this. 
You let out a sharp cry, as Carmy pushes himself inside of you, finally giving the thing you’ve wanted all day long. 
Carmy sets a slow pace at first, burying himself all the way to the hilt, so that you can feel all of him – every single ridge, every single vein of his cock with each thrust – and with how sensitive, how turned on you are, you’re already seeing stars. His hands hold onto your waist, controlling the speed of your lovemaking, as you press your hands against the shower wall, bracing yourself. You want him everywhere, all around you, consuming you with every fiber of his being, as if all you can do is hold yourself up and let him know how good he’s making you feel. 
Carmy’s lips are on your neck, leaving love bites across your shoulders, murmuring sweet nothings about how well you take him and how good you feel. And then he’s speeding up the pace of each thrust, pulling you back towards him. His hands are all over you: pressing you back against his chest, squeezing your breasts, pinching your nipples as he takes care of you. 
His wife. 
The mother of his child. 
The love of his life. 
You turn your head just enough so that you can kiss him as Carmy’s hand reaches up to cup your face, making sure that he can kiss you properly too. This time you’re standing up taller, grinding against him, wanting to touch your husband more than you need to hold yourself up against the wall. Your hand slips behind you, grabbing at whatever parts of him that you can, bracing yourself against him, as if you could get Carmy even closer to you, while the other is guiding his across your body, your fingers tangled together. 
He’s perfect. 
This is perfect. 
It’s what you’ve been aching for all damn day. 
“I need you, Carm,” you moan into his mouth, as the consistent feel of him thrusting in and out of you has you delirious. 
"You have all of me, baby,” he reassures you in the tenderest tone of voice he can muster, his other hand resting just underneath your breasts as he fucks you. 
"More." 
"More?" 
He’s not sure what ‘more’ could mean at this moment, but the dirty talk is so hot that he’s more than willing to find out. He slows down his pace, dragging his cock in and out of you and the most delicious pace. 
"Yes,” you pant, pulling away from the searing kiss, your head hanging low. Your hands return to the shower wall as you arch your back, bending at the hips so that you can take him deeper as you add:
“I want to make you a daddy." 
His hips stutter for a second, caught off guard by what you’ve just said. 
"You-you are, sweetheart,” he chuckles, slowing his pace down for a moment as he watches himself disappear inside of you over and over again. 
“Carmy,” you groan, in response to his change pace. 
You’re grinding your ass against him, begging him to speed up, but his hands return to your hips, stopping you. 
The sight alone, and what you’ve just said, he thinks to himself, might kill him. 
You whine as Carmy brings his movements to a halt, trying to get him to fuck you again. But he can’t let what you’ve just said go unrecognized as he stills your hips. 
"What was that? You like walking around like this, hmm? Everyone knowing what I've done to you?" he asks you, holding your hips so that you can’t move.
You’ll give him anything to get what you want. 
Even if it means saying it again. 
“Yes, baby,” you sigh, and Carmy lets out another moan as you squeeze around him. 
“I want to make you a daddy. Just fuck me. Please.”
“Oh fuck,” Carmy mutters, knowing he’s not going to last much longer if you keep that up. 
He pulls out of you, and before you can protest, he’s slamming back into you in a way that makes you sob. He sets a brilliant pace this time, and you're arching your back, pressing your hands against the wall even harder – and all you can do, all you want to do, is take it. Hearing you chant his name over and over takes over him. He’s a man determined, with a single-minded focus on giving you exactly what you want. 
He’s reduced you to a moaning, mumbling mess, as you chase both of your orgasms. 
“Touch me, Carmy,” escapes your lips, and he’s more than happy to oblige, his fingers immediately coming to your clit. 
He’s so goddamn talented, using his cock and his hands to make you fall apart. 
You feel a familiar coil in your belly, and with the way you’re squeezing around him, Carmy can tell your close. 
“Come on, sweet girl. Go ahead and let go for me,” his voice sturdy, confident, strong. 
And seconds later, your eyes slam shut as you’re crying out his name, falling over the edge as your husband pulls the most delicious orgasm from your body. 
“That’s it, sweetheart. That’s it.”
He’s right behind you – literally and figuratively – as Carmy’s thrusts become more erratic, finally letting go after exercising an impossible level of self control. He spills inside of you with a grunt, holding you against him as he pauses. 
Breathless, you throw your head back, grateful that his shoulder is there to catch you. With the slightest turn of your head, you’re able to kiss him, placing the gentlest kiss against the corner of his mouth before Carmy’s hand comes up to lift your chin towards him again, so that he can kiss you properly. 
“Holy shit, Bear,” you sigh, a sense of relief washing over you. 
“Yeah,” he pants, trying to catch his breath with you. 
You both take a beat, a moment to let your brains catch up with your bodies, just holding onto each other – savoring the way it feels to be in each others’ arms. 
“I should uh… I should probably still shower,” Carmy starts, beginning to come back down to earth. 
You turn back towards him, wrapping your arms around his neck, entertaining him with slow, lazy kisses in between words. 
“But why don’t you dry off and get into bed?” Carmy suggests, using a quiet yet direct tone, almost as if it’s an order. 
It’s as if he knows that, though the last orgasm he’d just given you had been world-rocking, there’s no way in hell you’ll be satiated today with just one. 
“Really?” you ask, hopefully with a giggle. 
“Yeah,” he nods. 
“Heard, chef,” you tease him, eliciting a playful eye roll from him. 
He releases you, giving you the time and space to wring out your hair and step out of the shower. 
And as you do what he says, he rewards you for it, spending the rest of the afternoon with his face buried between your legs until he’s ready to go again. 
*
“And we’ve got a special tonight. Lemon chicken piccata. We’re talkin’ major Berzatto family recipe, ok? So let’s make sure we’re talkin’ up, alright?” Richie announces, following it up with a reminder to all of his servers of the main talking point during tonight’s pre-shift meeting. 
Carmy thinks he’s been stealthy as he attempts to sneak back into the restaurant, considering he’s thirty minutes late. He feels lucky that since everyone is preoccupied with the pre-shift meeting that they couldn’t possibly notice him slipping in this late. He hears the meeting end, making a mental note that tonight’s mise has been done right, praying that tonight’s service goes smoothly. 
He has, afterall, been using up a lot of extra energy lately…. 
“Hey, Jeffrey. We were wondering when you’d be in tonight,” Tina comments, as she returns to the kitchen, ready to lead service tonight. 
“Oh uh, yeah. Sorry, got caught up with some stuff,” he mumbles, avoiding her gaze as he doesn’t have an excuse or a cover story. 
“Mmmhhhmmmm,” she sounds, passing him by, because it’s no secret what Carmen Berzatto’s been up to lately. 
“Yo, cousin!” Carmy calls out, in search of Richie. 
Carmy makes his way into the dining room, and as soon as Richie sees him, knowing what time it is – knowing that Carmy’s running late – he smirks. A blush runs over Carmy’s cheeks as Richie shakes his head with a laugh. 
It’s as if Richie can see right through him, and suddenly, Carmy’s feeling incredibly exposed.
Richie wags a finger at his cousin, his laugh beginning to build. 
“Ahhhh man, cousin,” he sighs, an amused look on his face as he continues. “No one warned ya, huh?”
“I-,” Carmy starts, searching for any and all excuses he could make up on the spot, to no avail. 
“Men can’t resist a pregnant woman. Sheesh. Enjoy it while you can, jagoff.”
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corviiids · 5 months ago
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companion write-up to the fic i just posted, 'call me by', which is a lawlight bodyswap fic inspired by your name / kimi no na wa.
don't read this post without reading the fic lol it is not going to make any sense!! im posting this because i think the fic is (well, sort of intentionally) a little vague and it might be fun to provide more context for anyone interested.
you obviously can read the fic without reading this though. this is just a thought dump. :)
this is technically an au, but i wrote it to be theoretically canon compliant if you squeeze things around and close your eyes a bit (as long as you don't think about timeframes lol and how many days are lapsing). i did fudge their ages a bit because otherwise light would be about 15, and i wanted him to be 17-18 because i think that makes more sense for him at this stage in his life lol. otherwise, i think it's actually kind of fun to imagine this happening alongside canon.
light leaves notes in L's home when he's in L's body and vice versa. generally they leave notes at regular intervals. longer paragraph breaks means a longer period between.
the mechanics of the bodyswap for the purposes of this fic:
like in your name, a swap starts when they wake up and finishes when they go to sleep.
once they swap back, they can't remember the names or faces (or any other identifying information, like career titles or voices) of people they personally encountered.
this includes themselves (i.e. if light in L's body encounters himself, he will not recognise it as himself and won't remember himself when he's back in his own body) and other familiar people (i.e. light won't remember that L works with his father, light wouldn't recognise L if he met him in his own time)
but if a person could be identified with public information, then they can retain their memory of that person (i.e. L doesn't struggle to remember ryuga hideki).
light is two years before L. i loosely used the anime timeline, so the kira investigation kicks off in about 2006-7, which is when L is. light is in 2004.
light nicknames himself asahi for no particular reason and nicknames L ryuga hideki after his sister's favourite idol. LABB confirms that L likes to take his pseudonyms from his past, so i thought it would be funny if the reason why L named light&soichiro 'asahi' and himself 'ryuga hideki' in canon is because light-of-the-past came up with those names already. (in canon that means that light would recognise those names immediately of course.)
when light's dresser catches fire as a result of L's meddling, it's not exactly the same trap as the one light sets in canon, but i think it's something similar because that's the way light's brain works. it does minimal damage but he still gets in trouble haha.
L figures out who light is pretty early on, which is why he's so careful and reluctant when light persists in trying to connect with L outside of the swapping. he also (unbeknownst to light) starts concealing information about the investigation from light because he believes light will later become kira and doesn't want to give him an edge.
light knows that L is a famous detective, and might get a vaaague inkling, but i don't think it fully clicks for him.
the body-swapping stops right before the yotsuba sting in the helicopter. after it stops, light doesn't open L's note for a long time because he is hoping they will swap again.
after light opens the note, he realises that L had known perfectly well who he was and struggles to understand why L didn't tell him + why L emphasised so hard not to open that note until after they'd stopped swapping. he figures, or fears, that the reason they stopped swapping is because L died, which is more or less the truth.
the last note takes place in 2006 after light picks up the death note and finally puts the pieces together that he was the kira suspect that L had been investigating. at this point he realises that he has been given the chance he'd been hoping for to save L's life by choosing not to become kira. his choice whether or not to take it, but........
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kangnoeulswife · 1 month ago
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𝐌𝐘 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐆𝐘
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𝐊𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐍𝐨 𝐞𝐮𝐥 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀᴅᴍɪʀᴇᴅ ᴋᴀɴɢ ɴᴏ ᴇᴜʟ ғᴏʀ ᴀ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ʙᴜᴛ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ʜᴀᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏᴘᴘᴏʀᴛᴜɴɪᴛʏ ᴛᴏ ᴀᴘᴘʀᴏᴀᴄʜ. ᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴘᴀʀᴛʏ, ᴛʜᴀɴᴏs ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅᴇs ᴛᴏ ʜɪᴛ ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴡʜɪᴄʜ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴛᴇ. ɴᴏ ᴇᴜʟ sᴇᴇs ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴀs ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀʏ ᴛᴏ ᴅɪᴄᴘʜᴇʀ ʜᴇʀ ᴊᴇᴀʟᴏᴜs ᴇxᴘʀᴇssɪᴏɴ.
𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬: 𝐰𝐥𝐰, 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟
𝟐. 𝟑𝐤 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬
𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐜 (𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐦𝐚𝐨)
𝐇𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲 :)
The blasting music roaring an unfamiliar tune. The vibrant lights flickering from colour to colour. The strong smell of different perfumes mixing with the sour stench of alcohol that lingered in the air. You wanted 𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 more than to go home.
"𝗛𝗲𝘆𝘆 𝗬/𝗡, 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘆 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗸𝗲𝗲𝗽𝘀 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂!" your friend exclaims eagerly, gently nudging your shoulder. You glance over and sure enough, there's someone staring intensly at you. Even from a mile away you would be able to recognise who it was - Thanos. Well, that's not his real name but that's what he desired to be called, just like the marvel character. It's also why he dyed his hair purple and painted his nails identical to the colours of the inifinity stones. He was dedicated. He winked weirdly at you and you 𝑤𝑖𝑠ℎ𝑒𝑑 you were drunk. Your friends, however, thought it was 'the cutest thing ever!' and began squealing uncontrollably.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thanos was a rapper. Well, a wannabe one at least. No matter where he was or what he was doing, he was 𝑎𝑙𝑤𝑎𝑦𝑠 rapping. And it was terrible even though all the girls thought it was the greatest piece of music to ever bless their ears. One time, you found a note squashed into your locker and there was no denying who wrote it:
𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒂 𝒅𝒂𝒛𝒛𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒅𝒊𝒂𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒅
𝒀𝒆𝒂𝒉, 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒉,
𝑰𝒏 𝒂 𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒆,
𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒚����𝒖𝒓 𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒆 
That may have been the worst thing you've ever read. His constant rapping (which he assumed was the sexiest thing ever) and winking got really annoying. What had you done so wrong to be targeted by him? Of course you weren't the first girl he pursued but you were the newest addition. Was this some sort of punishment.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"𝗔𝗵𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝗼 𝗮𝗱𝗼𝗿𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲!", your other friend screeched excitedly. "𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲'𝘀 𝗿𝘂𝗺𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗧𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗼𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲𝘀 𝗬/𝗡 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗿𝗺𝘀 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴! 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗽𝗹𝗲!" Both of your friends cheered back and forth about how you guys would be the 'it couple.' Yeah no thanks! You would like 𝑖𝑡 to stop.
You began searching the room to try take your mind of this uncomfortable situation. Or maybe look for an escape route, who knows! Suddenly, you locked eyes with a tall girl who was clearly staring at you. Recognising her almost immediately as Kang No eul, the quiet, mysterious girl who sat at the back of your class. You've never spoken to her but you have to admit that you felt drawn to her. Her short, fluffy hair that you longed to touch, her dark eyes that you felt lost in, her plump, rosy lips you were curious to feel on yours, her—
Your friends estatic screams forced you out of your daydreams, spotting Thanos and his companion Namgyu approaching you, swinging his arms proudly as if trying to impress you. You were 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 but impressed. You were also pretty annoyed. This is the first time you had made eye contact with her and it was ruined. Did you like her? No...... well maybe just a little. One thing for certain is you 𝑑𝑜 like girls and 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 dislike men. But no one knew you were a lesbian. How could you tell them? Your friends were boy crazy and knowing how they would react was damn near impossible. And the last thing you wanted was to have no friends. So you just kept it hidden and pretended you liked guys. That however was way easier said than done for someone who definetely wants a girlfriend.
"𝗦𝗲ñ𝗼𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗮 𝗲𝘅𝗰𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗺𝗲," he smirked, crossing his arms in an attempt to look cool. What the fuck kind of flirting was this? Señorita? That's pretty ironic for someone who showed up to Spanish class maybe two times! You longed for the ground to open up and swallow you whole. 𝐴𝑛𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 to escape this uncomfortable situation. Namgyu began giggling, as if this was the most impressive scene he's ever witnessed. Yeah, he was definetely high. When wasn't he?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There wasn't a word strong enough to describe Namgyu and Thanos. Annoying is an understatement. For starters they were always high, even during class and wouldn't give the poor teachers a break, always yapping about complete bullshit. Namgyu was also a dick, picking on anyone who even breathed too loudly near him. He hated everyone and treated people as if they were miles below him. Thanos on the other hand was in love with a new girl every week. Sometimes his relationships only lasted a day. But still, every girl desperately wanted him. Except for you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"𝗬/𝗡 𝗮𝗻𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗿 𝗵𝗶𝗺!" your friend whispers, urging you to reply to him. She nudges you slightly and you sigh. This would be a 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔 night. "𝗨𝗺 𝗵𝗶," you say, completely uninterested, not daring to look at him. You would probably burst out laughing from his serious face but childish words. "𝗛𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝗱𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗺𝗲, 𝗺𝘆 𝗯𝗲𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗳𝗹𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿," he demanded, putting his hand out for you to take. And it just got worse. Way worse. "𝗢𝗼𝗵 𝗧𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗼𝘀' 𝗻𝗲𝘄 𝗯𝗶𝘁𝗰𝗵? 𝗡𝗶𝗰𝗲𝗲," Namgyu declared, patting his friend on the shoulder as a way to congratulate him. Im sorry, 'his bitch?' Ha, as if! Your friends, however, thought it was the best thing to ever happen you, shrieking and shaking your shoulder full of joy. You did not agree, feeling annoyed with this guys stupid remarks and overly confident attitude.
Scanning the room again, not randomly this time but with a purpose, you see her. Her face calmed the anger you felt slightly as she continued to look in your direcion. But her once calm look had changed into an intense glare, staring daggers into your soul. She was 𝑝𝑖𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑑. But at what? Fuck, did she like Thanos and was mad he was flirting with you? You felt your heart shatter inside your chest at the possibilty. I mean, you shouldn't be upset. Why would she like someone she's never spoken too? Why would she like 𝑦𝑜𝑢? She probably likes boys anways and you're not one.
"𝗬𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗲𝘀?" Namgyu begins, impatiently and irritated as he snaps his fingers in your face, "𝗪𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄!" He could be a real asshole at times. No, all the time. "𝗢𝗳 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹!!" your friend declares joyfully since you haven't spoken a word. Great, now your practically being dragged by Thanos over to a table as your unwillingly holding his hand. Your friends strike you an encouraging look while you show them a smile, the fakest one you've ever made. You were 𝑓𝑎𝑟 from happy.
Of course Thanos' little lap dog had to follow. Out of curiousity and concern for his friend one might say. You would say he's just a nosy asshole. 
Sitting at that dimly lit table was awkward to say the least. Namgyu was yapping about some Min su that pissed him off (his cough irked him or some bullshit like that) while Thanos was intensely staring at you as if you were going to run away. Actually, you did think about escaping. Thanos kept bragging about how amazing of a rapper he was while 'proving it.' All he proved was your point - that he can't rap for shit. Like, at all. Honestly, a part of you was glad he preferred talking about himself all the time and left you no chance to mutter even a word. Namgyu was rambling away to himself about everything that pissed him off and you didn't bother him. You didn't want to engage in a conversation with them anyways.
♦︎
All you could think about was No eul and that look on her face. But what could it mean? You've never seen a jealous expression on her face before. Ever. Thinking back, she always remained calm. You liked that mysterious, calm vibe she had. Ever since the first day she joined your class, you were smitten by her. She was just your type! Although, you never admitted to anyone how she made you feel, not even to yourself for a while. Until you couldn't hide the butterflies in your stomach everytime your gaze landed on her.
She was always alone. Your unsure why but no one wanted to talk to her. But 𝑦𝑜𝑢 did. Your friends ruined it every single time you mustered up the courage to speak to her though, declaring statements such as "Omg just leave her, she's alone for a reason. No need to be nice" or "I heard she's a real weirdo. Best not associate with her." So, you never ended up becoming her friend. Or anything more. No matter how hard you tried.
But today when she was staring right at you, your heart felt like it was about to burst right out of your chest. Your fidgety hands couldn't hide your nervousness and it was as if you were the only ones here. You wished you were. Maybe you would have found the courage to approach her if Thanos didn't show up and ruin the vibe. But maybe it was for the best. Maybe Thanos is who she really desires, jealous that he was with you. You couldn't erase her pissed off look from your mind, wishing it wasn't aimed at you, but having a bad feeling it was.
♦︎
You excused yourself to the bathroom after a 𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦 long time of feeling uncomfortable and also to try shake your disheartened feelings. Your just thankful Thanos didn't follow you into the bathroom. He seemed like he would be clingy enough to.
Splashing water onto your burning face, staring into the mirror, you felt like crying. Because of 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔. Having to act happy sitting with this annoying guy just so your friends don't find out you like girls, not being able to approach who you 𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑢𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 like, all of it! Keeping it all bottled up inside gets exhausting after a while and you couldn't hold it in any longer. You just burst out crying in this empty room, tears streaming down your cheeks rapidly as you fall to your knees, clutching the sink as your knuckles turn white. You couldn't control your built up emotions that longed to be set free.
𝐊𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐍𝐨 𝐞𝐮𝐥'𝐬 𝐏𝐎𝐕:
I seen her. Y/N. 𝑀𝑦 Y/N. With that purple haired asshole. I felt my blood boil everytime he looked at her, got closer to her, held her hand. Maybe I'm being unreasonable. Maybe I'm the crazy one. But I liked her. Alot. The way her light hair framed her face perfectly, her soft features, the way she bit her glossy lips slightly any time she was nervous. She was sweet, always helping others. I noticed her attempts to approach me, despite being held back by her friends. I saw her efforts, bringing a warm feeling to my chest. She didn't think of me like some sort of monster. She was 𝑑𝑖𝑓𝑓𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑡.
It hurt being alone. More than I would like to admit. It wasn't an unfamiliar feeling but one I hated. But she changed me, even if she didn't realise. The glances she threw over her shoulder when she thought I wasn't looking brought joy to my boring and lonely life. I longed to talk to her. To say anything. But I never had the courage.
But Thanos and his stupid little minion had to ruin everything. Had to take her away from me. Maybe I was delusional. Why would she give me a chance? I'm a 'weirdo' and plus, I'm a girl. All I could do was sit back and watch, my heart shattering with every passing second. I could feel my fists clench as jealousy rose within me. I wish I had the courage to punch him, tell him to get his fucking hands of her and hold her close to me. But I can only wish, can only dream of such a moment.
She left for the bathroom and something within me snapped. I don't know where my new found bravery appeared from, maybe from the thought of her returning to his table while all I could do was watch helplessly. The thought of them flirting, getting closer, kissin-- No. Wasn't going to happen. And with that, as if my legs had a mind of their own, I followed her, my heart pounding in my chest. I wasn't going to let him take her from me.
𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐏𝐎𝐕:
The doors swung open, drawing your attention suddenly.
No eul.
She stood there, gazing down at you like you were the only person in the world. Fuck, she looked so pretty while you were a sobbing mess on the floor. She tip toed over, kneeling down in front of you. Without saying a word, she gently wiped your tears with her thumb, caressing your cheeks softly. Your heartbeat sped up with each passing second as you melted into her touch, her cold hands contrasting with your warm skin. It felt nice. You didn't want this moment to end. You wished time would stop, allowing you to stay here with her forever.
She suddenly broke the silence that lingered between you, not taking her eyes of you. "𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗼𝗸?" she asked softly, moving her hand down towards yours to hold it. You froze, your cheeks on fire as your heart pulses rapidly. "𝗬-𝘆𝗲𝘀 𝗜'𝗺 𝗼𝗸," you manage to stutter, sounding shyer than you intended.
"𝗜𝘀 𝗵𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗯𝗼𝘆𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱? 𝗧𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗼𝘀 𝗜 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻," she asked, gritting her teeth. You felt her grip on your hand tighten and this confirms the horrid thoughts that occupied your mind - she likes ℎ𝑖𝑚. You feel you heart break piece by piece, feeling your emotions flood through your body. "𝗡𝗼, 𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁," you begin, barely above a whisper as you hold back tears, "𝗜 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗵𝗶𝗺 𝘀𝗼 𝗜 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝘀𝗲𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗼𝗼 𝘂𝗽, 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁." The words felt heavy as they left your mouth, wishing you could dash away and be alone, unable to bear the pain any longer. Fuck, what happened to not liking her that much?
Silence. She stared at you in confusion before letting out a small chuckle. What was so funny? Did she finally figure out you like her and was making fun of you? Or maybe—
It all happened so quickly. One minute, your thoughts were eating you alive and the next, she leaned in slowly and kissed 𝑦𝑜𝑢. Your mind went blank as she felt her plump lips meet yours softly. A shiver ran down your spine, her warm breath mixing with yours as everything else began to fade away. The overly loud party, the uncomfortable encounter with Thanos and Namgyu, all of it. Nothing else mattered anymore. She chose 𝑦𝑜𝑢.
The kiss between you deepened, her hands continuing to cup your face gently as your arms found her neck, wrapping around her lightly. No amount of words could convey how you felt, the tension rising rapidly between you. The kiss you shared spoke enough for itself, the unspoken confessions neither of you dared to express unfolding and both of you knew. You wanted each other. 𝑁𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑒𝑑 each other.
No eul pulled away slightly, forehead resting on yours as she gently caressed your cheeks. You played with her soft hair, your fingers delicately brushing through the smooth strands. She smiled tenderly, accepting your touch. She had waited long enough. Likewise, you had too.
"𝗜 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗬/𝗡, 𝗜'𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂." Warmth flooded through your chest as she spoke the words you had always longed to hear. This was everything you wanted.
❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎
OKK I had to write something about her because I love her so much and I'll be doing a part 2 to this as well!
The title is based of the Twice song 'Strategy' (STAN TWICE)
Thanks for reading 🫶🏻
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sammylkcho · 5 months ago
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I read the request where the reader is Sebastian spouse hear me out though what if the reader said oh you sound like my husband but they don't recognize him since he's a fish and they show off the ring hear me out
Oh god, this was requested almost two weeks ago… I’m SO SORRY for the wait dear anom!
I gotta say, I wrote this and I’m not thrilled with the final result,sorry if it sucks..
Warnings/Notes: small angst, mentions of hallucinations but nothing real, signs of a growing anxiety attack, anxiety overwhelming the poor reader
Original request
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"The name’s Sebastian, remember?" it reminded you of its name, sensing a hidden plea in its tone.
"… Yes, Sebastian." You repeated its name, finding it strange to utter the name of your deceased husband. It had been a long time since you said his name, and it felt good to say it; it brought you a kind of comfort for a few seconds.
You rubbed the back of your neck for a moment, pressing your lips into a thin line as the growing anxiety and discomfort began to take hold.
You felt the bluish gaze of the "creature" (you hated calling it that, but you didn’t know exactly how to categorize it) piercing into your soul, as if it were searching for something, analyzing every piece to ensure not a single detail was missed. It was strange, both having it in front of you and being alone together.
When had your companions left? You didn’t know, and it probably wasn’t worth knowing; they had likely abandoned you since you were holding them back and had been a burden to them.
Those thoughts pulled you away from reality, making you completely forget Sebastian's presence and how intimidating he was with his great height.
He could tell that you were no longer grounded, having always known the times when your thoughts swallowed you alive due to your anxiety and the “what-ifs.” It was one of the first things he learned about you as he got to know you.
Both of you had questions about each other. Especially him, who knew it was you despite how disheveled and tired you looked, but in your case, you still didn’t know that the person in front of you was the same one you’d considered dead for the past 12 years.
How had you ended up here? Had you been blamed for a crime that wasn’t yours? Just as they had likely done to him?
Those thoughts made Sebastian’s blood boil. He felt so powerless for not having been able to do anything to prevent you from coming to a place like this, for having to suffer the consequences of someone else. So many things he regretted, even though only a few minutes had passed since your presence appeared before him like an angel.
There were so many things yet so little he could do.
His goal now would be to try to make you realize that it was him and not just a simple coincidence in appearance and voice.
He would make you realize and know that it was him; Sebastian Solace, your husband.
He clicked his tongue loudly to catch your attention (which he succeeded in doing with the sudden noise) and thus fulfill the objective he had in mind.
"Want to take a look? Got some things you might find useful on your endeavor." He asked you with a tone that would be too unusual for any expendable that had passed through his shop. That sarcastic, humorous, and hateful tone was always present in him, but with you, there was a hint of sweetness.
"Eh.. Sure." You responded, somewhat bewildered. Your feet carried you automatically to his tail once more, looking among the few items left on the straps he had tied along his tail.
You felt his gaze on you once again; this time, you didn’t try to find a reason or what he was trying to see or accomplish by looking at you. The sensation was uncomfortable yet comforting. Strange.
"Anything that catches your eye?" he asked you again, offering a smile filled with sharp teeth like those of a shark. A chill ran down your body from head to toe, as the more you looked, the sharper they seemed.
"You sound like my husband." You said abruptly, without having processed the words that had already slipped past your tongue.
You realized what you had said just before a wave of shame and melancholy completely invaded your body. You hadn’t wanted to say that, much less mention the fact that you had referred to your deceased husband. DEAD.
How was it possible that you saw your husband reflected in that person (fish)? It was utterly embarrassing, surely, for having made a comparison with someone he didn’t even know, he would bring you to a certain death or something even worse-
"What a coincidence, babe." He interrupted your line of thought, pulling your attention back to him.
Sebastian only called you that way when he was joking with you.
Your eyes moved to the ring that seemed to shine faintly in the soft light filling the room, noticing it had vague lines and curves that seemed to form something. It was eerily similar to your ring—the same one you had placed on Sebastian's finger, and he had placed on yours on your wedding day.
Why did the universe want to torture you like this?
He was dead; you had to accept it. He wasn’t in that same room with you, and much less alive. He wasn’t—
"What was your name again?" Your mouth betrayed you once more, speaking words that hadn’t even been approved by your mind. All of this was wrong, very wrong.
"Sebastian," he said, revealing more of the ring that had caught your attention. "Sebastian Solace."
After those words, the world seemed to stop for a few moments. The only sound you could hear was your own breathing, which was growing increasingly erratic. Denying to yourself that this all had to be a mere coincidence, a cruel trick of your mind, the accumulated stress seemed to be taking its toll, or perhaps the many sleepless hours and the insomnia had led to hallucinations.
The strong stench of fish and sea salt invaded your nostrils, forcing you to focus on what was right in front of you.
It was him; he wasn’t overstepping or invading your boundaries, always respecting them to have a signal or confirmation that he could proceed.
"You're dead…" you said in a low, broken voice, not noticing when you had started to cry.
"Yeah… you could say that, but you revived a part of me when you came here."
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thisapplepielife · 3 months ago
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Written for @steddiebingo.
Goddamn, Fuck You, Motherfucker
Countdown to Midnight Prompt: Soulmate | Word Count: 3420 | Rating: E | CW: Language, Sexual Content, Male Titty Fucking | POV: Eddie | Tags: Soulmate AU, College AU, Modern AU, Meet Cute, Or: Meet Ugly, Soulmarks, Invisible Strings, Hijinks Ensue, The Universe Had to Work Overtime on These Two, Matching Each Other's Freak
I actually got assigned the prompt "soulmates" on both the Christmas and New Year's bingo cards. Instead of trying to double-up, I decided to just make them companion pieces. Here are the links to both:
Part 1: Steve POV | Part 2: Eddie POV | Also on AO3
They are intended so they could be read standalone, but I wrote Steve's first, so I say go back and start there if you'd like to read both.
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Eddie wears it like a badge of honor. He wishes it was scrawled across his forehead instead of his arm. Goddamn, fuck you, motherfucker! is a damn good soulmark, if he doesn't say so himself.
Feisty. He likes that. 
He hasn't met him, or her, yet. He's not picky, never has been. 
Eddie rolls up his sleeves, and the mark is dark black, prominent. Like the freshest, newest tattoo. And he knows tattoos. He's got some good ones, and some bad ones, but this right here is his favorite and he didn't even get to choose it. It just showed up one day, a promise of who was to come.
They have nice handwriting, whoever they are. He's always thought so. He brushes it with his thumb. He just wonders when he's finally going to get to meet them. 
It wasn't in high school, not during any of the three senior years he had. He kind of thought that was why he kept sticking around, like he was just waiting for them to round a corner.
They never did.
Now, he's a senior in college on schedule to graduate in one go, thank you very much, and still nothing. Nada. Zilch. 
Oh well. It'll happen, or it won't. 
"You about done primping your hair or what?" Jeff yells from down the hall, and Eddie laughs. Jeff wanted to go to the big frat party on campus tonight and Eddie definitely wasn't opposed. He can probably off-load some weed, make a little extra cash, so sure, why not? 
Eddie settles onto the couch where he usually does his business. Right out in the open. He's the one to be feared, not the other way around. Gareth is next to him, yapping about some movie that they watched in his film class last night. Eddie's slightly interested. Playing chess against death for your soul? That does sound like something he'd like.
His arm itches. He looks down to scratch at it, right over his soulmark. This couch had better not have fucking bed bugs.
"Oh shit, Goodie's fighting with some frat boy," Gareth announces, sitting up to lean closer to the action, and Eddie looks up.
And Goodie most certainly is doing just that. 
Goodie just shoved a guy, and Eddie has about two seconds to open his arms to catch the cussing heap of a man as he slides across the coffee table, knocking Eddie's lunch box of inventory, and every goddamn drink, onto the ground. Not cool. 
What the fuck is Goodie doing? Yeah, he got the first cheap shot off, but this guy isn't small, and Goodie's definitely gonna get them all into a brawl if this dude has friends. Still, Eddie can't help but laugh, and he yells at Goodie, "You're a fucking dickhead!"  
He shifts the guy over onto Gareth, who makes an oomph sound like he's a delicate flower, as Eddie hops up to try and get this straightened out before it progresses into an actual problem.
Eddie slides his arm around Goodie's neck, and tucks him into his side in a headlock. Goodie lets him, laughing.
"What the fuck, Goods? You just laid that poor guy out, say you're sorry," Eddie demands, looking back at the pretty, if very confused guy still sitting on Gareth who has his hands up in the air, like he's being accused of a crime.
"I'm sorry," Goodie laughs, hand finding Eddie's side, and Eddie damn well knows he's positioning himself to get out this headlock if he needs to, "It was an instinct! A remnant from high school. Get bullied, push back, that's what you always said!"
Eddie turns back to look at the guy. If he really was picking on Goodie, there's gonna be a problem here, "He was bullying you?"
"I was not!" the guy yells. 
"He stepped on my foot!" Goodie clarifies, and Eddie laughs. Stepping on a foot is not bullying. It's an accident.
"He stepped on your foot, so you shoved him in my lap?" Eddie asks, making sure he's got this right.
Goodie huffs, "Well, I didn't think you'd mind!"
It was a nice gift, but still, Goodie's gonna get them in real trouble one of these days if his temper can't be, well, tempered.
"What's going on here?! I just went to the bathroom, there wasn't even a line!" a girl shows up shouting, hopping mad. "Now Steve is sitting in Gareth's lap? How do you know Gareth? You can't sleep with Gareth!"
She's rambling, hands waving in the air.
How do you know Gareth? Eddie thinks. He's never seen either of these two people in his life.
"I'm fine. We're fine, I think?" the guy says, but he doesn't sound sure about that. Eddie's sure. He's fine. He's definitely fine. In more ways than one. Goodie's not gonna do shit. None of them are. "I'm not sleeping with Gareth?" he adds, and Eddie's also sure about that. Gareth's not into men. 
This was just a misunderstanding. A comedy of errors.
Eddie's life, in a nutshell. 
"Not a question. Absolutely not. No offense," Gareth says, and well, that's his loss. Eddie would definitely take one for the team.
But he can't resist. 
"Look what you've done, now you've made his girlfriend mad," Eddie teases, still not releasing Goodie from his grasp. He deserves a little more torture. 
"Ew, gross. Not my boyfriend," the girl says, like she's absolutely disgusted by this idea. Has she not seen that guy? 
"She's a lesbian," Gareth says. And oh, that'll do it. Mystery solved. If neither of them want to sleep with this guy, Eddie will volunteer.
"Don't be so disgusted," the guy with the good hair and bitchy face complains. "I'm a catch."
That he most certainly is. Eddie caught him, if only briefly, and if he can reel him back in, he'll definitely be doing that.
"Do you still have a dick?" the girl asks, snippy.
"I still have a dick," he confirms quietly, and they're bantering. Eddie likes them. Likes this show he's unexpectedly been invited to watch.
"What she said," Gareth pipes up.
And Eddie definitely likes that this handsome devil has a dick. Eddie would like to be introduced to it, up close and personal, post-haste. 
"Well, we're all glad to hear it," Eddie says, finally letting Goodie stand up. Goodie shrugs, trying to get re-situated, and Eddie pats him on the back.
Jeff comes back, having missed the whole altercation, "What's going on?"
Then it turns out the girl, Robin apparently, knows all of his friends. And that is just an unfair and unjust world. 
Gareth seems determined to get Jeff caught up on all the action he missed, "Oh, Jeff, you picked the exact worst time to wander off. Short story: Goodie pushed this guy—"
"Goodie's here, too?" Robin says, like she hadn't even noticed him.
Gareth keeps talking, but what else is new, he's always talking, "—and get this, turns out, this dude is Eddie's soulmate."
Wait, what?
Eddie turns his head, eyes darting between Gareth and the very pretty man that looks like a deer caught in headlights, "What'd you say? Gareth, why do you think…" he trails off, and then looks down at his arm.
"You're Goddamn, Fuck You, Motherfucker?" Jeff cuts in, beating Eddie to the punch. Well, he might not have asked it like that, but the guy laughs.
"Well, I prefer Steve, but I'll answer to anything, I guess."
Steve. His soulmate's name is Steve.
That's officially his favorite name ever, now.
"Jeff, help me. Eddie tried to take my head off my neck," Goodie complains, and while Jeff will take Goodie's side, he's not gonna come in hot at Eddie, even if Goodie is angling for it.
"You pushed my soulmate. You got off easy, my child," Eddie banters back, circling Goodie, like he's sizing him up. Pushing at his chest, and Goodie laughs, batting his hands away.
"Let me see," Steve says quietly.
Eddie stops in his tracks. He knows exactly what Steve wants to see. Eddie walks over to him, and offers up his forearm:
Goddamn, fuck you, motherfucker!
The words, Steve's words, have finally been said. They're right here on Eddie's skin in Steve's messy cursive scrawl. 
Steve brushes his thumb against Eddie's mark, and Eddie feels a jolt go up his spine, as he goes half-hard in his jeans, immediately.
"Holy shit," Eddie whispers, he's never reacted to anyone like that.
"Uh, yeah," Steve says, and Eddie can't stop staring at him. 
They've got to leave here before he does something embarrassing in front of all his friends and a house party full of strangers.
"Wanna get out of here?" Eddie asks, and Steve is nodding before Eddie's even done asking. 
Back in Eddie's room, Eddie keeps running his hands over every inch of skin he can. All those moles and freckles. He's gorgeous.
This was the man made just for him?
He's never been that lucky a day in his life.
"You said it, and I missed it. Can you say it again?" Eddie asks, hand tangled in Steve's hair, pulling his mouth closer, so he can brush his lips against Steve's.
"Say what?" Steve asks, eyes glazed over. Nobody told Eddie meeting your soulmate would be such horny business. They've been touching, and rubbing all over each other for what has to be hours at this point.
"The words, your words," Eddie says, and Steve has to take Eddie's arm into his hand, looking like he's double-checking what he even said.
"Goddamn, fuck you, motherfucker!" Steve pops off, laughing as he says it, and Eddie giggles with delight, pressing his face into Steve's neck.
"You're a fucking dickhead," Eddie says back with affection, and Steve wraps his arm around Eddie's back and pulls him tight. 
Eddie can't believe he finally met him, and he's this gorgeous. Way out of Eddie's league, but Steve seems just as happy to be here as Eddie is, which, hot fucking damn.
He just wants to touch him everywhere, wants to see every inch of his body, wants to worship him now that he's finally here. 
Stripped down and bare, Eddie's checked him over, and Steve only has the one mark. No other tattoos. Just Eddie's own words, and miles of tan, freckled skin. And the moles. Oh, the moles. Not to mention the thick thatch of chest hair that lights a fire inside Eddie. Eddie rubs his fingers through it, and has the unexpected thought that he wants to come in it, wants to titty fuck him, even if that wouldn't exactly be an easy endeavor. Not to mention, well, maybe not something to suggest on the first date. He doesn't have to let his entire freak flag fly. 
He moves on, but will tuck that pretty mental image somewhere safe in the back of his brain, as he slides his hand down to thumb at Steve's nipple. Steve's hips come up off the bed, and Eddie knows they are going to have so much goddamn fun tonight.
Not just tonight.
Forever.
And isn't that a heady thought?
His fingers go right back to that chest hair, and his hand wanders, getting a handful of his chest, squeezing, and Steve chuckles. 
"Boobie man?" Steve asks, and it's playful, not judgmental at all.
"Fuck," Eddie says, and he wouldn't have especially said that he's a boob man. He likes them just fine, but there's something about Steve's chest hair. Manly, dark and thick in the middle, spreading up and out, that is really pressing buttons he didn't even know he had.
"I'm a pervert, the things I want to do to you will send you running for the hills," Eddie says, and Steve lets out the best sounding laugh in the world.
"Doubtful. Do 'em," Steve says, "I'm no blushing virgin. I've been around the block. I've been around several blocks, and had fun on every corner."
"Fuck me," Eddie says, rubbing his hard cock against Steve's thigh, "how come our blocks never crossed until now? My map was faulty."
Steve giggles, and it's adorable.
"You're gorgeous, and your chest hair is making me think all kinds of thoughts," Eddie admits, leaning back so he can see Steve's face.
By giving Steve space, Steve takes both hands, and presses his pecs together. There's just enough softness, just enough give, that Eddie is sure he could actually do it.
He could slide his dick between them, and feel all that hair hugging the underside of his cock.
Eddie starts fisting his own cock, watching. Wanting.
Their first sexual encounter cannot be him fucking Steve's chest. He's weird, and proud of it, but maybe not that weird.
Instead he slides down the bed, and admires Steve's impressive cock as it lays against his belly, hard and leaking. Steve flexes, making it bounce, and Eddie laughs, delighted. Can he already love him? Because he thinks he already loves him.
Eddie slides his fingers between Steve's cock and his belly, guiding it upwards, rubbing the head against his bottom lip, tongue sneaking out to taste, and then he sinks down, taking him fully into his mouth. He's a mouthful, more than, but Eddie's no quitter. Eddie moans, and Steve echoes him, as Eddie uses his free hand to grip Steve's hip.
He wants to blow him, wants to roll him over and eat him out until he cries and begs for Eddie's cock. He wants it all, wants everything, and thinks he just might get it.
Eddie's never had sex like this before. And he's had some damn good sex. This just feels like a whole different level of attraction, of connection.
Soulmates. 
He thought he knew, but he really didn't.
Steve's in his lap, rocking back and forth on his cock, working him over like a goddamn pro. Arms wrapped around Eddie's neck, mouths locked together, sharing breath, unwilling to let one another go. 
He was right. He is feisty. Just not in the way Eddie had always expected. 
Eddie's getting close, and he snakes a hand between them, fisting Steve's cock, hoping he'll be able to to take him over the edge right along with him. 
"Eddie," Steve breathes against his mouth, a warning, and Eddie nods up and down, encouraging him.
"Do it, god, do it. Come," Eddie demands, and Steve does. Warmth hitting Eddie's hand, his belly, as Steve tightens down on Eddie's cock, pulsing with his orgasm.
Eddie pushes up into him, still chasing his own, when Steve unceremoniously slides up and off him. He's bewildered, stunned for the heartbeat it takes Steve to flop onto his back, hands pressing the sides of his chest together, an offer.
Eddie strips off the condom, slides his thighs along Steve's ribs, and leans forward, bracing himself against the headboard. Slick cock pressing into Steve's skin, the slight roughness of the chest hair a new sensation, and he thrusts. He can't see Steve's face, not from this angle, but the idea alone is enough to get him across the finish line, and he slides back, a downstroke, coming with a long, hard groan. Fuck. That was something. Too quick, but so fucking filthy that he couldn't hang on a second longer.
He pants, and scoots back down to Steve's waist. Admiring his handiwork. Come is stuck in Steve's chest hair, and some shot upwards, hitting the underside of Steve's chin, pooling in the hollow of his neck.
"Fuck, we are meant to fucking be," Eddie says, rubbing his thumb through the mess, darkening his chest hair even further, matting it together.
Steve laughs, "I'm gonna need a shower, but goddamn, you were worth the wait. I've been waiting for somebody to match my freak."
Eddie laughs, delighted and wowed by this man under him. His fucking soulmate. He moans, and buries his face in Steve's neck as they cling to each other, spreading the mess further. They're both gonna need showers, and that's totally fine with Eddie. Worth it.
And this was just the first time. First times have no business ever being that good, and Eddie presses his mouth to Steve's sweaty neck, offering him open-mouthed kisses.
Offering Steve himself, his love, his whole future if Steve is willing to take it.
All of his freak, and more.
Morning comes too soon, and Steve slides out of bed to get dressed. Eddie watches as Steve pushes down his sleeves, and then changes his mind, pushing them back up towards his elbows. 
"It's supposed to be sunny and seventy, definitely up," Eddie chimes in, hands tucked behind his head, just enjoying the free show.
Steve smiles, "Yeah. Just, habit. I've hidden my mark for so long it's gonna take some time to break the habit."
"You hid it? Why?"
"Well, you're a fucking dickhead didn't seem wildly romantic. I had no idea it wouldn't be directed at me," Steve says, and oh, Eddie never thought of that.
Eddie gets out of bed, and wraps his arms around Steve's middle, squeezing him tight, "I'd never. But I get it. I thought mine was towards me, too. But I was wearing it like a badge of honor. Fucking Goodie," Eddie teases.
Steve grins, "He finally introduced us. I can't be too mad at him."
And Eddie isn't mad either, he owes Goodie several beers. A new pair of shoes if he's still salty that his toe got stepped on. Whatever he wants, within reason.
"Do you really have to go to class?" Eddie asks.
"At least my first one. Six more weeks to go."
"Yeah, yeah. Same boat. You anywhere near the union for lunch?" Eddie asks, hopeful.
"Yes. Meet you there at twelve-twenty?" Steve asks, and Eddie nods. That works. Eddie doesn't want to take his hands off of him, doesn't want to let him out of his sight, like he might disappear, even if that's irrational. They've exchanged numbers. Apparently all of Eddie's friends know Steve's best friend. Steve's not going anywhere. 
"Here," Eddie says, walking over and rummaging through his closet, pulling out a black t-shirt, "wear this. Nowhere to hide."
He hands over the shirt, and watches as Steve tugs off his Henley, tossing it onto Eddie's bed, and then slips the new shirt over his head. Corroded Coffin emblazoned across his chest, and Eddie grins. He's got a soulmate.
He's got Steve. 
"Look at you," Eddie says.
Steve looks down at his chest, "Oh, my friend Chrissy talks about this band."
"You know Chrissy?" Eddie asks, because Jesus H. Christ, of course Steve does. The universe was working overtime to get them connected, but for some reason they were just stumbling around the same campus like fools, not making it happen, for four years.
"You know Chrissy?" Steve repeats. "I've been meaning to introduce her to Robin, I think they'd hit it off. We should all do something. Goodie can push me down again, or whatever it is that you all do for fun."
Eddie tosses his head back and laughs, "He's not usually that aggressive. He must have been possessed by our profane soulmarks."
Steve smiles at him, and it makes his heart flip in his chest. How did he get this lucky? Steve Harrington is perfect. He couldn't have picked better if given the choice. He's really something else.
"The universe thought we needed a shove, literally."
Eddie grins. Definitely worked. Job well done.
"Full transparency? That's our band," Eddie says, a smile tugging at his lips as he touches the logo on Steve's chest, "and we have a slot at The Cave on Friday."
"Wouldn't miss it," Steve says, leaning forward to kiss him one more time. Eddie kisses him back before Steve really has to leave, the door closing softly behind him.
Steve may have had to go, but Eddie'll see him later, and they'll pick this right back up where they left off.
Eddie picks Steve's discarded Henley up off the bed. Maybe he'll wear this today. He doesn't need to wear his mark like a badge of honor anymore. He won the whole goddamn lottery, because Eddie's finally met his match, his soulmate, and Steve is more than he could have ever hoped for. He can't wait to see what the future brings for them. 
He pictures an entire life shared between Mr. You're A Fucking Dickhead and Mr. Goddamn, Fuck You, Motherfucker.
And Eddie laughs, absolutely delighted by the prospect. 
He can't wait.
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Read Steve's POV here.
If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @steddiebingo and follow along with the fun! 💞
Notes: I don't think I've written soulmates before, so I'm not sure if I've stayed with the trope or veered into left field, but I know I had fun with this one. I loved the idea that their first words in each other's presence would be something so unhinged, lol. And Goodie shall never let either of them forget that their soulmarks were spoken to him not each other.
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thebookbutterfly · 11 months ago
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Hey there! Could you possibly write a Sandor Clegane x gender neutral reader where Sandor has a soft spot for reader and reader feels the same? He tries to hide it but one day reader get’s hurt and he patches them up and maybe confessions come out?
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🦋 Little Bird— Sandor Clegane x gn!Reader
Summary: You get injured in an ambush. Sandor carries you to safety and takes care of you.
Tags: #so much hurt/comfort, #a teensy bit of angst, #fluffy ending, #potentially OOC Sandor Clegane but personally I think he is pretty baby girl, #request
Warnings: Gender Neutral, no use of Y/N, descriptions of blood and injury, mentions of death, cannon compliant threats of violence, no beta and no ‘ragrets' [1,371 words]
AN: This is a request by @agender-wolfie. I really hope that this is what you were looking for! It came out a bit longer than I intended, but I am such a sucker for hurt/comfort tropes I really shouldn’t be surprised lmao. I wrote this all in one sitting and I haven’t done any editing so please excuse any errors. Happy reading! 🦋 Love BB
If you like this work my requests are currently open! So please give me your ideas ;)
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You hissed a curse, gravelly and threadbare, as Sandor sidestepped another fallen tree.
A jumble of vulgar expressions that barely registered to you as they left your mouth. Almost all of them taught to you by the giant man holding you to his chest. The hound cradled you surprisingly gently, but his tension was evident. It was written all over him.
His scarred face, which you so rarely got the opportunity to study, was pulled into a broken grimace. The rest of him taut like a wire ready to snap beneath his armour. If you weren’t bleeding all over him, you might have reached up to prod the furrow of his brow. A silly attempt to smooth away Sandor’s permanent scowl.
The thought shattered as another wave pain tore through your ribs. Every bump in the path sowing fresh agony in the ruined skin and muscle.
Sandor ran a calloused thumb over the side of your knee in apology. Uttering clumsy noises of comfort as he picked up the pace.
“We’re almost there. Hold on just a bit longer, little bird.”
His gruff voice was cut with a noticeable amount of panic. Your brow scrunched at the unusual sound. You had gotten used to many things about Sandor as you travelled North with him. His rough sense of humour, bitter attitude, scarred face and huge stature were familiar to you by now. Underneath those things, his kindness and his softheartedness had become apparent to you too.
All the vulnerable pieces of himself that he smothered and choked beneath layers of vulgar humour and recklessness, had been presented to you in glimpses as you got to know him. But panic? Panic was new to you.
The farmhouse that Sandor had marked out in the distance finally drew into view. Up close it was a measly grey thing. The stone masonry looked haphazard at best but its chimney puffed with life. Behind it a barn lay with its doors open and rattling in the freezing wind.
You expected Sandor to head straight for the shelter of the barn but instead he strode to the front door. The family of four, seated around the dining room table inside, scrambled back as he slammed open the door with his usual subtlety. Which was to say— none at all.
You groaned as the sudden movement jostled your wound. Normally you would have chastised him for being so rude but your head was swimming. Too weak to lift your hand, you focused your energy on your eyes. Willing them to stay open, if not for your sake then for the sake of your worried companion.
An old man stepped forward to speak but Sandor cut him off, “One of you better be a healer, because if they die I will mount all of your heads outside on sticks.”
It was an ugly threat and they paled. The youngest boy whimpered looking suddenly ill. A younger woman with dark hair and a generous smattering of freckles stepped forward. She gestured a slightly shaky hand towards the table before him, before turning to her family.
“Clear the table, quickly. We can lay them down here,” her attention shifted back to the massive man standing in the doorway, “I’m not a healer by profession but I’ll do everything I can.”
Sandor seemed pleased enough by this answer. The rest of the family had been wise enough not to put up a fight and so Sandor stepped forward. He eased his grip and lay you down on the hastily cleared surface.
He moved to step away and let this stranger do her work but you whimpered. Fingertips clutching at air until he shifted back into reach.
A leather belt was stuffed between your teeth as your tunic was torn up the side. Unfamiliar hands grasped at your arms and legs. Holding you down with a bruising grip. All the while, Sandor brushed his bloodied fingers over your forehead and through your hair. The warmth of his skin a small consolation for the pain you were about to endure.
The woman lifted a needle and thread. With a glance at Sandor and his affirming nod she began to count down and you closed your eyes, unable to look.
Three.
Two.
One.
Fire. Your body was on fire. You arched off the table. Trying to escape the agony, the needle slowly piecing your flesh back together. The table shook as you thrashed but the hands holding you down didn’t falter. Sandor’s gravely words of comfort were the last things ringing in your ears as the world went black.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
The first thing that you noticed when you woke up was the lack of pain. Your side still ached, the wound tender, but it was a dull throbbing now. No longer, the screaming torture it was as Sandor carried you away from where you were ambushed.
The second was the warmth. You couldn’t remember the last time you had been this warm since you and Sandor had journeyed across the border into the North. Sandor.
You opened your eyes slowly. The lighting was dim but from what you could tell you were inside the barn. The door was closed now though and soft orange candlelight illuminated the space.
You lay on your good side underneath a thick layer of blankets, and next to you lay the man your eyes sought for. His arm tucked you to him, large calloused hand resting somewhere on your lower back.
His heart thudded rhythmically beneath where your head lay on his chest. His even breathing and faint snores filled the quiet. Despite your inner protests it was the most comfortable you had been in years.
You gazed up at him, not wanting to wake him just yet. Sandor didn’t sleep nearly enough and you were content to watch the way the candlelight danced across his skin. It caught on his scarred cheek. Shadows flickering on the panes of his face.
Unable to resist you lifted a hand to his cheek. Your touch was featherlight but his eyes snapped open. Sandor’s gaze flicked to you immediately. Scanning you for distress and finding none, his body relaxed.
“Seven Hells, I thought you were going to die. Never do that again,” he said gruffly. His cheeks were flushed but he made no move to shift away from you.
Your voice was cracked from screaming but you still managed to mumble, “M’Sorry.”
Sandor sighed, “It wasn’t your fault, little bird.” He reached into his pack and pulled out a water-skein. Unscrewing the top he held it out towards you.
“Here, drink. Then you can go back to sleep,” he said.
“Thank you.”
The moisture eased the pain in your throat and soon you were snuggled back up under Sandor’s arm. The wind howled through the rafters and you both sat in silence for a little while.
Your thoughts broke the quiet, “Thank you for carrying me here. Thank you for staying.”
Sandor’s eyes met yours, they were unguarded and soft in a way that seemed reserved for you. Reserved for these conversations in the dark.
His voice was low as he replied, “I would have carried you to the ends of the earth, little bird.”
You studied him, the scars that mottled his skin, the cut on his brow and the curl of his mouth. Something deep within you settled, like a cat stretching out on a rug.
“You’re a good man, Sandor Clegane,” you said.
The conviction in your voice hit him harder than any blow on the battlefield ever had. The tidal wave of emotions that followed threatened to take him under but he swallowed them down.
You pretended not to notice his watery eyes and he lifted his spare hand to stroke your head. “Go to sleep, I’ll keep you safe.”
You nodded sleepily, too tired to fight it off any longer. A few seconds pass before you feel it. The soft press of his lips on your forehead. They linger there for a while before he pulls back, the warmth that they leave behind searing like a brand on your skin. You smile as you drift off, lulled to sleep by his warm embrace and steady breathing.
“Goodnight, little bird.”
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moonstruckme · 1 year ago
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OOOOO I didn’t realize you wrote for steddie x R!!! Can I request your version of what would happen if reader came down with a nasty stomach bug from work and our boys tried to take care of her only to end up with it themselves? (Totally not projecting my own unfortunate current demise 🫠)
Thanks for requesting lovely! Feel better <3
cw: mentions of nausea, stomach pain, not eating due to illness
poly!Steddie x fem!reader ♡ 759 words
“Poor little lovebug.” You’ve given up on trying to deter Eddie as he sets his lips to your temple, cuddling close, but you and Steve exchange a look. 
The other boy rolls his eyes. “I’m not going to take care of both of you,” he says. You all know it’s an empty threat. “If you get yourself sick, you’re on your own.” 
“I’m helping,” Eddie argues, lips meandering down to your neck. You inhale softly as the muscles in your abdomen spasm painfully, and his hands are there in a second, pressing over the sore spot like it’s a wound he can stopper. “What’re you doing, Harrington? She doesn’t want your lame toast.” 
Steve softens. “She’s gotta eat something, though.” He looks to you, almost apologetic as he says, “It’s toast or cheerios, honey. Unless you think you can stomach something more.” 
You shake your head, snuggling into Eddie. He makes a happy sound, adjusting his position to tuck you under his chin and get you more securely in his arms. You’re sick of being sick. It’s only day one of the stomach flu several of your coworkers have said they didn’t get over for three days, and you’re well and truly fed up with it. Fed up with being nauseous and achy and alternately too hot or too cold. 
Steve had discovered upon his early-morning search that there’s not one thermometer between the three of you and has been debating going to the store to get one, but says he’s reluctant to leave you in the hands of the most inept caretaker possible (your very sweet and loving boyfriend). Eddie is ambivalent; he says you don’t need a thermometer anyway, because his lips are the best gauge there is (he keeps pressing them to your forehead and making sizzling noises, which Steve only found funny the first time but entertains you and Eddie to no end).
Eddie fully gives over to your self-indulgent tendencies in not eating, but Steve is watching you with a dissatisfied little furrow between his brows. He crouches by the bed, feeling your face with one hand and reaching for the nightstand with the other. 
“At least have some gatorade, then,” he capitulates, holding the bottle out toward you. “You’ve gotta stay hydrated.” 
You feel guilty and sit up. Eddie protests at your moving, but Steve gives you a smile as you drink. 
“You’re really a ton of help,” he snarks at Eddie, though he reaches down, carding a hand through his boyfriend’s curls. 
“I’m just succumbing to my fate.” Eddie shrugs. “I’m gonna be sick tomorrow, may as well start acting like it now.” 
“It’s not as fun as it looks,” you say between sips, then regret it. Your face heats as both boys’ expressions turn pitying. 
Eddie wraps a hand around your hip, squeezing lovingly, and Steve says, “I know, honey. You wanna nap for a while? We’ll give your stomach a chance to settle before we try with the toast again.” 
You nod and let Eddie wrestle you back down onto the mattress, pulling you snugly against him. “Think of it this way—at least soon, you’ll have a companion in your misery.” 
And by the next morning, you do. But it’s not Eddie. 
“Toast,” Eddie begs, shoving the piece of bread forward like he’s jousting with it. “C’mon, baby, just a few bites.” 
Steve groans, crossing his arms over his head. “Later,” he bargains. “I can’t do it right now.” 
Eddie looks to you desperately. “Did you finish your water?”
“Mhm.” You give the empty bottle a little shake as proof, and your boyfriend sighs in relief. 
“Good girl.” He bends over you, stamping his lips to your forehead firmly. “Thank you, sweetheart.” 
You hum and reach for his hand, but Steve grabs you, turning you around and hugging you to his chest possessively. You’re more than alright with this, nuzzling his stubble while he splays a hand on your back. 
“You know what? Fuck you, Harrington.” Eddie slaps the piece of toast on Steve’s shoulder and leaves it there. “Can’t believe you’d fucking do this to me. That better be gone when I get back.” 
“Where are you going?” Steve asks, smugness evident in his tone. 
“To get a fucking thermometer!” 
Steve’s chuckle rumbles through the both of you, and you smile against his neck. 
“You’re enjoying this way too much,” you tell him. 
“Yeah, I don’t know what you were talking about.” He kisses your cheek, his lips as warm as your skin. “This is tons of fun.”
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heli0s-writes · 8 months ago
Text
intricate rituals*
a/n: You know how kids pick on each other but it's actually because they like each other? It's like that. 4.7k words. I don't know why this one was so long. I wrote this as a companion piece to slow hands. warnings: fantasizing & masturbation, language, the usual helios sprinkle of angst because Steve. Please stop reading if you are not 18+
brooklyn after dark masterlist
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Judgmental red numbers gleamed from the alarm clock on your beside table. 2:50, it leered like a schoolyard bully, and you could only groan in reply, shoving your pillow over your face and muttering into it a string of unintelligible curse words.
The day stretched too long after you were hit—socked—square in the left orbital. Your skull ached and thrummed, congregating pain at the welt along your brow bone, and beneath all of it, your brain was at once empty and full of insistence.
And although you’d have to be vertical again in about three hours, your nerves were still uneasy, still roiling beneath your skin because adrenaline could be a bitch and a half like that.
You were floating aimlessly in limbo, trying to force-sink into the distance of sleep. Thoughts skated behind the back of your eyes and around your ears, restless fingers twitching beneath blankets. Each time you slipped off, the rug was pulled out beneath your feet and your body jerked awake, leaving your heart racing. Self-sabotage.
You were too tired to attempt a jog, not trusting your sore muscles to maneuver the compound’s wooded perimeter. The best option was the easy route: quick, simple, and only a little offensive. After all, imagination after a certain hour of the night was a dangerous thing but flirting with danger in private was worth it once you could rest after.
Besides, asking Tony for any strange white pill to put you to sleep was perilous at best and fatal at worst, and asking to be gently placed in a sleeper hold by a friend was a one-way ticket to seeing the on-call psychiatrist.
And, anyway, they’d think you were a masochist.
And, well, maybe you were. But that’s not their business.
Maybe you’d like it to be though. Maybe you’d like to see the flutter of interest, the reciprocity, admittance that they were also a little masochistic because who in this line of work isn’t?
Volunteering to get pummeled day in and day out must be diagnosable in the DSM-5 manual. Yeah. At least a few of your teammates are masochistic. You’d bet good money on it.
Bucky, for one. And—oh—wouldn’t his cheekbones look so good bright red? You could cut your palms on those.
Here was the danger with imagination past a certain hour of the night:
Co-ed dormitory style living with a gorgeous cast of characters—all deranged in their own right—but still gorgeous. Lovable despite their many, many flaws. Egregious, maddening flaws.
Some were shared, inhabited by every member like they decided to build homes inside of their neuroses. Martyrdom, obstinacy, the occasional withholding of all worldly pleasures when they thought they deserved deprival—when someone would fuck up unnoticeably on a mission and then self-flagellate inside their mind for days afterwards.
Bucky’s refusal to trust his own instincts sometimes; Tony’s incurable lust for sticking his foot in his mouth like he’s starving for the taste of dirt; Natasha’s quiet, catastrophic need to be useful whether it made her a teammate or an object.
Steve— the basket-case. A whole shitshow marathon of issues all crammed up in his bright blonde head, and it’d get so full it would rush out of him by way of seething rage, reflex reactions, his boot pressed against yours as he’d stare down. His hands curled into boulders, jaw working in slow, powerful movements as clenched and unclenched his teeth.
You couldn’t help but think of it now and again. Imagine him turning all that misplaced anger to good use.
One hand ventured to your thigh, the other crossing over your chest, rubbing up your bicep to your shoulder. There was a knot you couldn’t massage out, that Bucky couldn’t either despite his best efforts. His flesh hand first and then his other hand when he thought a temperature change would help. It whirred by your ear, the plates shifting like bee song.
You could hear yourself hum lightly at the memory. It felt nice—smooth, cool, heavy. The weight of his curled fist as he kneaded, the strength in his fingers he was always holding back, even more so as he worked over the delicate skin near your neck. You didn’t shudder then, but you began to.
He’d probably laugh if you did. Roll his eyes even though he’d be pleased about it.
And excuse you for being like everyone else in the world who’d ever seen Bucky Barnes and his arm in action.
You might just say, shut up, just touch me, and he would. Touch up your neck, thumb propped at the base of your skull, the rest of his fingers around your throat where he’d drum out the beat of an old 40’s song.
And then Steve began emerging from darkness along with a couch, cheek propped on his fist, watching lazily. It was indigo all around him. Just a lamp somewhere in the corner making the side of his pale face warm orange.
Guess three’s not a crowd in your book—
Shut up, Bucky.
His hand was still on your neck, but you’d gotten in his lap, thighs spread until your legs were on the outside of his. He’d lost his shirt and landed on the couch next to Steve, who asked, petulantly, I’m here to watch?
You weren’t sure. You didn’t expect your own half-awake mind trying to reason itself out of a sex fantasy. Not when Bucky was shirtless beneath you, slightly tanned skin displaying a scatter of freckles like the time he ventured to the tropics and came back with a grin lasting almost two weeks.  
But Steve was expecting an answer and the critical eyebrow high on his forehead repeated the question: I’m here to watch?
Apropos of nothing except being 85% shut down, you replied with, you hit me today, and fell forward into Bucky’s arms. It was sullen and Bucky snickered, pressing his nose into the dip between your collarbones, a kiss somewhere nearby.
I didn’t mean to, Steve said cooly, still unamused.
Oh yes he did. Bucky touched you again, the webbing between thumb and forefinger beneath your breast for a second before he tweaked a nipple. Your toes curled slightly, chest jolting upward, and Bucky confirmed, masochist.
Steve perched his elbows on knees, leaning forward. One hand reached out, stroked the tapering edge of your eyebrow down to your cheekbone. His face was sweet, pleased, mischief cutting across his features. He pressed his finger down just a fraction, made your bruise sore with it, and the sweetness in his face glinted sharply.
Okay, he said, what else do you want?
He pressed down again and a handful of Steve’s flashed past as you exhaled. All those glimpses of him in various phases of his life, light-speed. There were suspenders and pressed white shirts too large for him. There was short hair and ballcaps and aviators. The way his shoulders hunched as he made himself invisible in a crowd. Captain suits in bright blue, then dark blue, and finally the deep night of the stealth number, material of tough neoprene and dull and sturdy across his chest. His hair was long flipped out at the ends. His beard grew and then shortened in length.
You couldn’t decide what else.
He was standing and then he was sitting. He leaned back on one elbow, sprawled like a Greek statue on a chaise lounge.
He was behind Bucky, arms coming to rest on either side of his neck, hands hanging limply forward, palm up, as if coaxing you closer, pressing Bucky tight in the middle until he huffed with discomfort.
Guess three is a crowd in your book.
Bucky disappeared and Steve came forward until he was flush against you.
In my dress uniform, really?
He sat with his thighs spread, contemplating your choice of Steve. His hair was slicked back, the high collar of his dress shirt starched and cupping his sharp, gorgeous jaw.
He was a garbled assemblage of an old photo in olive-green military wear. His blue eyes sparkled with attentiveness. He looked down his chest at the ribbons you were sure were incorrect, but they approximated something official. The jacket was starched and crisp, slacks well-pressed and fitted nicely.  
You liked the idea of him young, hopeful, and—smiling.
He placed his hands on your biceps before moving to your waist, stretching his fingers as far as he could to snare you. The fabric of your white button-up crinkled between your body and his. Three top buttons were undone, your breasts spilling out.
Steve’s hair was a mess, like it’d been yanked at fiercely. His mouth was wet and red and he was pawing at your back, rolling his hips upward until your groins met. His voice was rumbling and stuttery, brows together and cheeks rosy.
He stopped moving, only looking up at you with enormous eyes like a dog waiting for a command— which he’d never, ever looked like before. Panting as he caught his breath, he took a labored gasp, pulled his bottom lip between his teeth and asked.
Ma’am?
Oh. God help you.
There he was in all his glory, one foot into martyrdom and the other still in boyhood. Before everything crashed and burned and he was still clumsy with it. Just a bright, beaming thing pleading for  you to notice his light.
He began to fumble, hardly used to his body and so different than how you’ve seen him hurl himself through the air head-fucking-first because he was always ready to die on some hill or another.
He was shy, worrying his gorgeous mouth into a small line as he looked and looked. Over your face, down your neck, your chest, the mismatched set of underclothes you were still dressed in—and he stared at it entranced as if you were some kind of centerfold.
Like he ever would—but your brain was an electrified lump of meat, so dream-Steve could forgive it for irrationality.
But you were still sane enough to feel guilty about it because he was 24, and in a flash of genius engineering, he’d be weary beyond all his days.
Which hurt, which was stupid, which was really killing your whole endeavor.
You couldn’t do it with the thought of him careening into war at 20-something and couldn’t even worse with the thought of him, terrified and alone, the same giant, blue eyes searching the modern world for a sliver of recognition only 7 years later.
So your fingers halted between your legs, letting his nervous, boyish face shimmer away into the back of your mind.
Your eyes opened back up. The clock taunted 3:15, sizzling fuchsia.
You closed your eyes again.
The numbers shifted, rearranged until they were two curved lines and Steve’s mouth was there, hovering over yours, and he’d grown up some—you could see it in the pallid sheen of his skin, the creases in his face that were less from age and more from suffering. He waited, saying nothing.
There was supposed to be a lot you could do here. All manners of debauched acts to imagine— involving rope and whip and raking your nails down his back until your name burned in his throat, his considerable figure reduced to a tremble as he ached for you.
But you couldn’t, because suddenly the agony of not being able to sleep pivoted into a strange, new turn of events. From wanting to touch yourself to wanting nothing more than jumping into a lake to erase the turmoil his big, blue eyes roused in you, you struggled on a little longer, peeking around his haloed head of blonde, faint light behind him like a corona.
No? He drew one eyebrow up toward his hairline, his full pink lips quirking into a smirk. Not doing it for you? Why’s that?
You put a hand over his mouth, but dream logic was in no mood to be silenced, and Steve’s voice crept up in your ears anyway. No matter how much you wanted to shut him down, to push him away, he remained.
The truth, soldier. He tipped his head and looked at you past long, dark lashes. Give it to me straight.
-
“Couldn’t sleep?” His voice was gravelly.
You rubbed your eyes, wincing. 4 A.M. approached while you were still caught in a loop in bed—drifting, then jerking awake, nauseated with each new scenario.
Finally, it had been enough. You couldn’t force a thing that wouldn’t arrive, and so you trudged to the training room with your water bottle and forgot shoes along the way.
“Just need to get my mind off things,” you replied, and swatted weakly at a punching bag.
Steve was still wrapping his knuckles because he would always have more foresight than you do and watched you from the corner of his eye. You tapped at the leather, jabbing one-two, one-two, until it began to sway marginally wider, the link chain holding the bag rattling like windchimes.
You wished he wasn’t in the gym. You could feel him in the corner of your mind, a presence that sensed you as much as you sensed it, that weighed heavily, waiting.
“You’ll split them open.”
You jumped in surprise and then it only took a few steps before he was in front of you, hand outstretched with the wrap.
“I’m fine,” you protested, but his mouth was a thin straight line that didn’t need to emit any words. He’d just nag until you gave up. Then he’d throw you onto the wrestling mat and call it a lesson.
Maybe you were cranky.
“I can do it myself,” you attempted, but he ignored it steadfastly, focused on pulling your fingers apart.
“Sure, you could.”
You shifted your weight, “You think I’d fuck it up or something.”
“I think you’d do it clumsy. Think it’d be a rush job.”
He secured the loop onto your thumb before tugging it over the back of your wrist. You watched his fingers, wrapped up skillfully, as they turned and twisted around yours. For all his calluses, he was handling you delicately, and it was all too strange.
Sweat beaded along his brow, his pink cheeks from an earlier warm-up were settling the longer he stood still. He wasn’t making eye contact even as you ducked to find his gaze. It felt like part of an apology.
Nothing passed but his breath and yours, both awkwardly out of their regular tempo. You knew why you were being so weird, but couldn’t guess a damn what reason he would have.
Suddenly, he said, “If I pulled my punches in practice, it would skew your perception in the field.”
You deliberated this information, and the way he offered it up. Like he was bringing you a precious relic you’d be grateful to receive. What an honor. The stinging aftermath of his bones against your bones.
“So this,” you tilted your face forward, showing him where his forearm landed this morning and the pulp of your skin that ice, for fifteen minutes after, did nothing for, “This is a favor?”
He frowned, something complicated skittering across his face.
After a minute, which was quite a long time for Steve to meditate when you were obviously baiting him, he said, “It’s a warning. Enemies won’t go easy on you. I can’t either, even if I wanted to. It’s my job to make sure you’re prepared for whatever is coming next. It’s my job to bring you back home.”
“That’s nice—"
He cut you off, firm. “That’s the truth.”
The truth.
You felt it with your entire chest as Steve stood there, attention fixed upon your hand, his own circling your wrist and palm and then between the sensitive webbing of your fingers with diligence.
A lock of hair fell over his forehead, obscured one eye, and when he looked up behind it in wait of your reply with that open, honest expression, you gulped.
The truth, he asked in your dream— that he seemed to be wanting now wordlessly. That you’d been punching down every morning and night because it was so simple, and excruciating.
The truth was, you were stupid for him. And just stupid, in general, because you could never tell him. Because he was Steven Grant Rogers, for fuck’s sake. He was stunning and tortured and you wanted to die sometimes, just looking at him because you didn’t know how else to express it.
Because there wasn’t a world where you could step up to Steve, stare down the magnum opus of his monumental hero’s journey and feel like you could be a contender for a single, sad crumb of his attention. 
And yet you could never quite help yourself.
The truth:
Sometimes you’d do it to get his hands on you—to motivate him, to have him spare a single glance your way. Screw up the training exercise just so he’d spend an extra hour beating the drill into you.
Because outside of your private quarters and battered-tired imagination, when would he ever?
Because short of begging him to touch you, when would he ever?
The baiting. The backtalk. Challenging him at every turn. You were a spiraling addict, grabbing any high within your reach.
Hell, you were just as deranged as the rest of them. DSM-5, eat your heart out.
He dropped your hands, finished, and brought his thumb up to your temple where the welt throbbed under his pulse. “There,” he said. Almost silent, almost like you imagined it.
Then between one heartbeat and the next, his lips parted, bottom one pulled in almost imperceptibly— and— fuck, you didn’t understand a damn thing.
You made a noise like a fish out of water and he rubbed the back of his broad neck, craning his sight to the high ceiling. When he turned back down, he was soft at his edges, the tired years on his face placated.
“I know what you’re doing. You don’t think I know?”
You were nearly sure you were still in bed, and the fantasy was turning on its head, coming up absurdist and you were ready, nowpleasegod, to wake up.
“Pickin’ fights in alleyways since I could throw a punch. Why’d you think so?”
You sputtered, because you’re a ham-fisted, sleep-deprived, single-minded moron, “Because you’re a glutton for punishment?”
Steve snorted. “Like you are?”
You could feel the burn of agony twist its way up your neck, the way fact exposes itself when there’s no other cowardly avenue to run down. He watched, his sea-glass eyes stormy and insistent, and the lights of the compound gym were like stage spotlights now, white, and localized.
You found interest in your feet, because you were still missing shoes, and Steve followed the path and saw your toes curled up tight like hiding themselves.
“Jesus,” he huffed with dismay.
“I was tired. Am. Still tired.”
 “Go back to sleep.”
“I tried. Why do you think I’m here? Have you ever seen me here?” You swept your arm out toward the abundance of equipment that have not yet been acquainted with even your shadow.
“Now that you mention it,” he replied.
“Not once—my god, Rogers, it’s like you don’t know me at all.”
“Hey,” he said, because you were doing that horrible, compulsive, nervous-tic conflict thing again, and this time he put his hand on your shoulder and it was warm.
Your skin crooned his name.
“What. Are you doing.” Your throat was bone dry.
He stepped closer—not a dream, he was real, he was there, he was breathing your hair and touching your shoulder—and he dipped his head down, in wait.
“Oh,” your mouth decided sentences were beyond its means. “O-oh.”
“That a yes? Or no.” He moved to step away, his serious expression fluttering into embarrassment, and then guilt, and then you were doing an aerobatic move between a hop and a hurdle to reach for his face.
Teeth clicked, and you winced. He didn’t seem to mind, only stabilizing you with one hand on your neck and the other at your hip. His lips were full, hot, like there was a pulse in his mouth that was trying to overcome yours. He towered, not just in height, but—you couldn’t describe it. Your head was swirling, dizzy.
“You haven’t had any water today,” he murmured—and what kind of psycho would say that during a kiss.
“Do you mind?” you grabbed at his hair, “I’m trying to—” You kissed him some more, your brain a fluttering, ecstatic mess. You shivered when he licked your tongue, fisted his collar when he made a huff—a moan—and then he was gone, a faint hiss between his teeth and his eyes burning darkly.
You wanted to fall down to the gym floor, take him tumbling with you, hands impatient and wild as you felt for each other. Up t-shirts and down waistbands, tongues sloppy and missing each other, leaving lines of spit along chins and necks.
It felt silly—stupid, reckless, fantastic—but it was damn good. Like two kids figuring out their bodies for the first time. So natural and luxurious that you could literally fall forward into him, let him do everything. Strip you naked in the damn gym, fold you in half atop some mats, over a bench, leave marks down your spine and up your throat. Curl himself so deep you could feel him in your mind for days after—you wanted it all.
He was laughing a little bit, the creases of his eyes lit with joy as he weaved left and right, getting all the right angles to mouth at you with. He pawed and squeezed and sighed as he touched you, feeling every inch. He was excited, and it kind of killed you to know—made your belly swelter and clench with pride.
You rolled your hips lazily into his, and he backed up until he found a bench to sit down on, pulling you by the hand, the wrap yanking open and unspooling onto the floor.
“This okay?” He asked.
You made a low, pained sound.
“Hey,” he said, and you blinked at how concerned he was. He steadied your shoulders, his long fingers comforting and heavy. “You okay?”
You yawned, and when you looked at him again, he was confused. And he was standing.
You couldn’t keep up. You looked down dumbly at your empty hands. He was just there.
Oh, gods.
Steve was standing—at the punching bag, not sitting on a bench with you between his thighs. And the wrap that had unspooled from your left hand was limply hanging from your right, the necessary supplies in a bag next to your foot.
You went ice cold.
You wobbled and caught yourself, because you were standing in the middle of the gym idly, realizing that you’d spent the last 10 minutes losing yourself in a fever dream about Steve.
“You okay?”
“Fine,” you said too quickly, recoiling when he side-stepped from his position to head toward you. Your knees trembled, the place between your thighs warm and clenching madly on nothing.
“You don’t look okay.”
“You’re… worried about me?”
Steve narrowed his eyes and said “yes”, like you were stupid. But then he breathed soft, and looked so much like that fantasy you’d conjured up a few seconds ago, that you turned and made ready to bolt.
He caught your wrist.
“I need to—” he began firmly. “You need to listen--”
But you didn’t. You licked your lips because he was so close and you were insane with want for him, and he stopped dead in his tracks for a split second, eyes tracking your mouth and the short, puffs of air that your chest was pushing out without you meaning it to. Just quick huffs as you bit down on your lip to make yourself quiet and small and unseen.
Steve swallowed. He said something almost silent and it sounded like sorry before he leaned forward and caught your mouth with his.
He sighed into it. Breathed into it. He placed one hand on the small of your back and pressed your entire body to him, and you moaned like he tore it out of you.
And this time, it was real. The two of you scrambled for each other, heaving and loud.
He took you to the floor, only took another few impatient, hotheaded licks of his tongue and then he was inside of your shirt, his mouth sucking round, wet brands up between your breasts.
You bucked up to get closer, and he sank down, licking and sucking and all ten of his fingers dug into your hips and waist.
“Shit,” he said.
“Uggnnn,” you replied eloquently before your better judgement pivoted and decided to swipe at reason. “What’s—“
“You make me fucking crazy.” Steve rushed out.
“Fair,” you gasped when he began rolling his hips against yours. “Feeling’s mutual—oh, what are you doing--”
He only answered with more of it, and harder, up and down, his forehead pressed to yours—his entire body, really, pressed like he wanted to swallow you whole.
It went on for eternity, it felt like, the two of you messy and starved, every second of contact a half-fight, half-resignation. Between the rushing blood in your head and the high-pitched ringing of excitement, there was a relief, like your skin was singing finally, oh god, finally.
Steve, above you, was smiling—was happy—almost as if he felt the same.
-
“Next time just say something,” you said, when you could finally breathe again.
“Like what?” He wiped his forehead. You did that to him.
You sputtered, the taste of his tongue still in your mouth, “Like—just don’t hit me so hard. And don’t say you have to.”
He opted to say nothing instead, only rolling his eyes, and you found the perfect opportunity to continue pestering. “Do you ever pull your punches? Could you maybe try?”
He only grinned with that wet, red mouth, and his eyes flicked down to you like a challenge. “I hold myself back more often than you think.”
“Name one time you held back from anything.”
His lips pressed together, a smile squirting out of the corners as he looked at his bare feet, toes flexed against the mat. His lashes were fluttering as he pondered, looking so shy and mischievous all at once.
“Just now.”
“Now?”
Beneath your collarbone, the bruise Steve sucked into your skin stung with embarrassment. The sound you made when he did it should be burned out from all memory. You had to beg him to stop, you could have cried.
“I had it all wrong. I thought you might have liked getting bossed around in bed, but you’re a sadist, Rogers.”
“No, no. You can boss me around.” He paused, “Maybe. You can try, go ahead.”
“Now?”
“Yeah, try.” And if you were to look up the definition of shit-eating, annoying, and contrary-bastard-even-more-so-than-yourself, you’d find his smug as sin picture.
“I need to go to sleep— team captain, my ass. Don’t you care about my well-being, Rogers? What even is your refractory period?”
“Don’t have one.”
Your brain was a watery 7-11 slushie, and instead of saying anything comprehensible back, you only babbled.
Just then, the gym doors slid open and both of you were on your feet like someone had been shooting them.
Natasha looked you up and down. From the crumpled bedclothes to the unruly hair and then to your mouth, which was slightly open and catching your breath. She narrowed her eyes, glanced over to where Steve stood leaned on the wall, shuffling his feet in an attempt to sort out his sweatpants.
She made to remark something else but then Bucky sidled up wearing nothing but basketball shorts and grey socks.
“It’s ass o’clock,” he complained loudly. “Why are any of you awake. Never mind, Steve you’re a degenerate. You wake up at 4. I was having a great dream, then Nat drags me up, then you’re already here? You fucking animals.”
“Hm, a dream?” Nat drawled, “Anyone I know?”
She flicked his chin already knowing entirely too fucking much.
“Can’t remember the details,” Bucky turned to you offhandedly before recognition lit in his eyes. “Oh,” he chirped, leering. “I remember now.” He wolf whistled, muttered, “Hello nurse,” and rubbed his palms together like he was warming them up.
You backed up, covering as much of your body as possible with two hands, and bumped your ass into Steve, dick-first, who cleared his throat loudly.
Nat only cackled.
226 notes · View notes
azrielwingspan · 1 year ago
Text
'SOMEONE' (AZRIEL X READER)- PART 2
Summary: You are convinced that Azriel was the one to send the note. Anxious about facing him, you lose yourself in your head but strangely, things are turning out...weird.
Warnings: Mild swearing
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A/N: Thankyou so much for the response on the first part you guys! It was supposed to be a one shot but due to popular demand, I wrote down a second. Not gonna lie, I'm a bit nervous about this because peer pressure haha. Really hope this meets expectations. Did my best to make it fun and playful.
Read Part-1 here.
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'It's hard not to pry when you're involved.' The words kept flitting through your mind , jumbling your thoughts and stirring up a butterfly party in your stomach.
You knew it was from Azriel. Who else could it be ? Not believing it at first, you tried to think of all other possibilities and came up with zero. No else could possibly know about it.
Except him.
After stewing upon the unexpected turn of events for a good couple of hours, you did something anyone else in your position would've done.
You tried to hide.
From a spymaster.
You were really setting standards in the department of intelligence.
It had all started when you were having lunch with Cass and Mor at the House of Wind. "How was your new book?" Mor asked stuffing herself with the mashed potato in front of her. "It was alright. It just felt a little flat." you stabbed at the piece of chicken on your plate.
"Why the gloomy face? Everything okay?" Cass looked at your face intently. You sat up a little straighter, forcing a small smile onto your face. "I'm great."
"Are you on something?" Your head shot towards Mor, a flabbergasted look on your face.
"What made you say that?"
"You've been acting weird since yesterday and just this morning you stared off into space with a stupid smile on your face. Now, you're gloomy. I've seen this before--"
"Oh for Mother's sake, I'm not on anything Mor." A choked laugh burst out of you at the incredulity of it.
"Is it because of the stable boy thing yesterday? Shit Y/N, we didn't know you still --"
You narrowed your eyes at Cass , daring him to finish that statement. He immediately backed off, putting up his hands in the air.
"Just a concerned friend." He said with a teasing smile.
"You guys are the worst." Soft laughter was shared between the three of you before disaster struck.
Footsteps echoed from the stairwell making your head whip towards it. Eyes widening a fraction, your brain was thrown into a whirlpool of thoughts , each one fighting for dominance over the other. You knew with absolute certainty that it was him. There was no one else in the house. You also knew the sound of his footsteps but that was a fact to be pondered upon on a different day.
Wait, he was a spymaster. Why was he making a sound in the first place?
He wants you to know. Doesn't want to catch you off guard. The still functioning part of your brain helps you out.
"Are you having a seizure?" Mor's voice registered in your head.
"No , but I might." you muttered under your breath, your body reacting before your mind could give it a command. Almost stumbling from your chair all the while trying to look as unbothered as possible, you excused yourself from the table mumbling a reason to your companions.
Exit points available. The stairwell. Your mind supplied. YOU CAN'T PASS BY HIM. DO BETTER.
The plant. - THE PLANT ?! What were you supposed to do ? Photosynthesize yourself ?!
Under the table.- Ah yes. Have a front row view to his crotch. Way to go.
Balcony.- We don't have WINGS! You screamed at yourself.
The door to your right.- Finally. A good option.
Your face must have exhibited a plethora of emotions during the internalized battle with yourself because Mor and Cass were staring at you like you had two heads.
"Y/N. Please sit down. Something is seriously wrong." Cass said rising from his chair.
"No. No. I just forgot to do something very very important. I'm going to be screwed. I just need to---"
"Have lunch. I'll help you out with whatever it is." The voice like night whispered over your skin setting off goosebumps in its wake. His scent enveloped you, taunting and teasing your senses. It almost seemed to whisper- Look at me.
So you did.
You had expected a smirk or a smile or even a twinkle in his eye. Nothing. No hint or trace of what had happened. No clue to suggest that he knew or that he was the one to send the note.
What if you were wrong? What if it wasn't him but someone else playing a joke on you?
"No it's alright. I..." You didn't get to finish the sentence as he pulled your chair back and motioned for you to sit down.
Sighing out loud you returned to your place at the table trying not to look at Azriel as he took the seat across. "What did you forget?" Cass was starting to sound suspicious. Racking your brain for a quick and believable answer, you blurted out "I have to respond to a letter. A very important one."
The double meaning of your reply hit you the moment it left your mouth. Your body betrayed you and turned your gaze towards Azriel.
Nothing. Blank as a slate.
Starting to grow frustrated, you stabbed into your chicken a little too enthusiastically.
"It's already dead." Azriel said dryly, not even bothering to look up from his food.
Mor let out a snort and thankfully started to recall a conversation she had with a friend of hers. You could feel the tension leave your body as the conversation and attention was steered away from you.
Get your shit together.
Fortunately, all of you were done eating not long after and everyone went back to their duties. Azriel hadn't said or done anything for the rest of the afternoon and you were seriously starting to doubt if you were wrong.
You made your way back to your room trying to make sense of your emotions along the way. There was a sense of relief that Azriel didn't know and yet it was tinged with the undertones of disappointment that he didn't know after all.
Did you want him to know or did you not?
You didn't know. UGH. Idiot.
Stepping into your room, you almost missed the note that caught under your foot.
Fuck. Another one.
Heart thudding painfully, you picked it up with trembling hands. It read:
Anyone is capable of falling in love with your heart. Me? I want to be the someone you give it to. -'Someone'
A/N: I did not intend to end it this way at all but here we areeee. Hope you guys enjoyed it !
TAGLIST : @crazylokonugget , @hayrunnwr , @fxckmiup , @wildlyobserving , @harrystylesfan2686 , @63angel , @charlotteintumbleland , @willowpains , @nyx-the-alien , @acourtofbatboydreams , @marina468 , @anuttellaa , @kalulakunundrum , @amygdtjhddzvb , @lulu22156
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avocado-writing · 1 year ago
Note
Not the same anon as before, but what about a reverse Mummy/Daddy kink - the companions calling Tav Mummy/Daddy 👀👀
LMAO alright here you go. happy belated valentines ya crazy kids (same set up as last time, as if it’s being called out mid-sex) - minors DNI this is filthy
companion piece here
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Astarion
Does it because he thinks you’ll like it. Makes sure to moan it wantonly as you’re fucking him, rolling your hips slow and sensual.
Looks up into your eyes as he says it, caressing each letter across his tongue, heavy-lidded and breathy. Every inch of him is sex.
You pause your hips, cock a brow.
“Do you mean that, Astarion?”
The way you’re staring at him makes him consider. Does he? He loves the way you’re making him feel, and now he considers it a warmth is creeping across his body…
Whispers it again, then moans when you start fucking him in earnest. He cums harder than he has for ages.
You cuddle him afterwards and he’s never felt safer in your arms. Perhaps he’s more fond of calling you that than he realised…
Gale
(wrote a whole fic about this here…)
Is mortified. Apologises profusely. Should have cleared it with you first.
Didn’t mean for it to sneak out, he just feels so safe with you… He couldn’t help it…
You catch his face between your hands and give him the most gentle kiss, beginning to move your hips and fuck him again. He cries out into your mouth in ecstasy.
Is so full of love as he cums, collapses into your embrace after and lets you pepper him with kisses.
You whisper that he’s a good boy, and he melts.
Wyll
Just as mortified as Gale, maybe even more so.
Tries to pull away, assuming you’ll want to stop —
So is surprised when you pull him back to you, start kissing him softly and sensually. Reassuring him he’s alright, you’re not angry.
Press your forehead to his and rock your hips back and forth until he begins to whine out in need, and you eke the word from his lips again.
You make love softly and slowly, showering him with praise, luxuriating in the sweet sounds of ecstasy he makes.
He does apologise again after, but you let him know you don’t mind. You quite enjoyed it, actually…
You tease him just a little, but always with a kiss afterwards.
Karlach
She gets so super duper swept up in the session that she doesn’t even realise she’s said it.
“Karlach, what did you just call me?” “Eh? What did i call you??”
When you tell her, she laughs. “Oops! Did I?”
You stroke her face, brush some of her hair out of her eyes. “Do you want to call me it again?”
She grins and, as you go back to fucking her, she shouts it out so loudly that the whole camp knows what you were up to last night…
… she can’t pretend she’s ashamed.
Shadowheart
“Aww, Shadowheart, what did you just say?”
She huffs and tries to deny it, but you bring it out of her again later when your mouth is between her legs. It’s a name she cries out as her fingers bury themselves into your hair.
You don’t stop, in fact you go harder, encouraging her to cry out even more.
It becomes a chant of your name and that word as you drive her to the edge, she moans it as she orgasms on your tongue.
You tease her good-naturedly for it, and she gets grumpy, but then you whisper “mummy/daddy doesn’t mind…” into her ear and it gets her going again…
Lae’zel
You aren’t sure that you heard her right.
“Uhh, Lae’zel, did you just call me…” “Tsk’va! Do not stop in the middle, keep moving your hips!”
So you keep going, even if you’re a bit bemused, because gods was it hot to her that word drip from her mouth mid-sex.
She, as always, leaves you sore and satisfied afterwards. You turn to her as she relaxes on the pillow.
“Did you mean to say what you said?” “I mean every word which passes my lips. There was no mistake. Did you enjoy hearing it?”
You consider this because… yeah. You did. She looks smug.
“Then it shall be repeated.”
Halsin
Genuinely never thought he’d be the one using it in bed, but you’re fucking him so good, he’s on fire for you…
It just sort of slips out. You pause and look down at him, grinning, delighted.
“The mighty archdruid Halsin calling me that, hm… let me show you what a good boy you are.”
He’s left just wide eyed and utterly boneless after. You hold him close and kiss him all over, stroking his hair and checking that he’s alright.
“I’ll admit, I did not think such a word would ever cross my lips… but I cannot pretend I did not enjoy it. Perhaps we can repeat the experience…” he confesses, feeling his cock grow hard again.
You grin, and oblige.
Minthara
“Minthara did you just call me—“ “no. Return your mouth to my body and do not speak of this again. Ever. To anyone. Or I shall gut you.”
Afterwards you let her know that it’s alright if she did call you that word. She still denies it, but when she thinks you’re not looking she seems… pleased.
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taglist: @ghosti02art @sadandanxiouswtf @yeethaw13 @trappedinlimbo15 @infinitely-kate @dhampling@wereallbrokenangels @tilldeathdousnugget @somethingblu3 @hopeful-n-sad
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vilevenom · 1 month ago
Text
This idea has been sitting in my drafts forever, and I finally wrote it today because a fan animatic made me sad.
(If you wanna see an amazing animatic you should go watch it here. It has nothing to do with the fic, it's just good)
There'll be Good Times Again
Fandom: Sonic the Hedgehog (video games)
Pairing: Sonic/Lancelot, implied Sonic/Shadow
Summary: Everyone else thought it was just a dream, but it had all felt so real. The way Sonic's heart felt like it was going to break in two certainly was.
Sonic sighed happily as he leaned into his companions side as they sat on the grassy hilltop, closing his eyes as the soft, warm spring breeze swept through his quills. The enticing scent of freshly bloomed flowers danced around them on the wind as his companions fingers slid between his own, pulling a quiet, pleased hum from Sonic.
"My lord…"
"How many times do I gotta tell you, Lance," Sonic chuckled, sitting up to shoot the knight an amused grin, "It's just Sonic."
"Ah," Lancelot let his gaze slip away from the blue hedgehog's face, his muzzle betraying his embarrassment with a soft pink flush, "Sonic."
"Yes, Lance?"
"I just…wanted to tell you. Should anything happen-"
"Hey! It's a beautiful day, the sun is shining, birds are singing, and Camelot is rebuilding! I don't wanna hear any doom and gloom out of you, mister!"
"Sonic, please," Lancelot tightened his hold minutely on Sonic's hand, shifting his position to fully face the other hedgehog, "allow me this one moment? It will set my heart at ease to say it."
Sonic let a long, slow breath out his nose before giving a short nod, a crooked little smile on his face as he reached out to pluck a stray piece of grass from Lancelot's quills. "Fine. But only one, so you better make it good."
Lance returned the smile with a soft one of his own, bringing Sonic's hand up to press a gentle kiss to his knuckles. "A challenge I am more than willing to take on," he chuckled. He then took a deep breath, crimson meeting emerald as he began to speak. "I simply need you to know…should anything happen to tear us apart from each other, whether that be an attack on the kingdom, or the force which brought you to this world sweeping you away again, I shall forever be your most loyal knight, and I will aways love you. No matter what form I may take, in any world you may find yourself in, your soul and mine are most surely intertwined and meant to be together."
"Lance, that's-" Sonic puffed out a breath, quickly wiping at his eyes and shaking his head with a light laugh, "That's beautiful, but we both heard Merlina. She figured out how to summon me here, but she has no idea how to send me back. And! There's nothing that could attack Camelot that we can't handle. You really don't need to be so dramatic. Even if it is incredibly sweet." He lifted his free hand to cup the side of Lancelot's muzzle, smile turning soft as Lance tilted his cheek into the hold.
"Even if that may be the case," the knight sighed, turning his head to press a brief kiss to the palm of Sonic's hand, "I just wanted you to know."
"Hmm…moment well spent," Sonic chuckled, drawing Lance in close to sweep a feather light kiss over his lips, "I love you, too."
~
Sonic woke with a start, his arms and legs flailing, only serving to tangle himself further in the blankets already wrapped around him like a cocoon. He gasped as his squirming nudged him over the edge of his bed, letting out a loud yelp as he hit the floor, the tangle of blankets falling over him gently to bury him in bedding. He thrashed as footsteps approach the door, loath to allow any of the knights to find him in such an embarrassing situation as being trapped by his own blankets.
"Sonic? I heard a loud noise! Are you okay?" The bedroom door opened just as Sonic managed to free his upper body from the tangle, shooting a reassuring grin at the door, only to falter at being confronted with the decor of a bedroom he didn't think he'd see again and Tails' worried face.
"Uh…ah, yeah!" Sonic forced a laugh, waving his little brother off as he used his now free hands to pull the blankets free from his legs, "Just had a weird dream and fell off the bed! Nothing to worry about, keed!"
Tails looked skeptical, eyeing Sonic for a moment, before shrugging, obviously assessing that nothing in the room had been damaged and Sonic wasn't grievously injured in some way. "Alright. Well, Amy said she'd come by a bit later this morning, so get up soon, okay?"
"Sure, bud! No problem!"
With that Tails slipped back out of the room, closing the door with a soft click as he went. Sonic rubbed at his head, confused and off kilter as his brain tried to catch up with the fact that he was apparently back home, without any rhyme or reason. He then noticed a book that had obviously fallen when he was flailing around, pages bent at odd angles from the way it had landed on the floor. He gently picked it up, his heart giving a painful lurch in his chest as his eyes scanned over the title; 'The Once and Future King'. Had it all been nothing but a dream?
~
Sonic tilted his head as he heard footsteps approaching the spot where he sat on the grassy hillside, knees to his chest, watching the world below go idly by, fully expecting Tails or Amy. It had been a week since he'd woken up from his 'dream', and the two had been a bit overbearing the past few days, constantly checking in on him, siting his uncharacteristic melancholy mood as the source for their worry. He supposed it couldn't be helped, really. As much as he'd wanted to come home, and as much as he loved his friends and his life on Mobius, he'd just gotten used to the idea of living in Camelot for the foreseeable future. With Lancelot.
No conceivable time had passed while he'd been in Camelot, so even when he'd told his friends of his adventure they'd been skeptical of him, at best. He'd quickly laughed it off with them when he realized that as much love and support his friends would always give him, there was just no convincing them of his time spent away. He'd begun avoiding them to try and get his thoughts together, hoping that a little bit of solitude would help make the unsettled, twisting feeling in his chest go away. All it had done was afford him time to reread through his book of legends and lament unintentionally leaving Lancelot behind without a word.
The blue hero did not expect to find Shadow walking towards him with a nearly unreadable expression on his face when he fully turned to see who was approaching. He blinked a couple of times in surprise, before plastering a smile on his face, hoping it was convincing. He'd been hoping to put off seeing Shadow for as long as possible, given the rather unfortunate fact that the hybrid shared a face with his knight. But, unfortunately, not his heart.
"Ah! Hey, Shads! What brings you out here?" Sonic asked, uncurling his legs and leaning back on his hands casually as Shadow came to a stop next to him.
"Rose has been messaging Rouge nearly non-stop since you disappeared, and so I was sent out to find you," Shadow grunted, arms folded across his chest as he stared out across the town beneath the hill.
"Oh. Uh, sorry about that," the hero laughed, running absent fingers through his quills, "I just needed some time to think."
"You? Think? That's laughable," Shadow snorted, earning a bitten off laugh of surprise from Sonic. The hybrid seemed to dither for a moment, before gracefully settling himself next to Sonic in the grass. He sighed heavily, crossing his legs while folding his hands in his lap. They sat in silence for a moment before he spoke again. "What's been bothering you?"
"Bothering me? C'mon, Shads. You know nothing bothers me," Sonic snorted, playfully shoving at the hybrid's shoulder to little avail, as he did little more than shoot a glare at the hero. He tried to keep up the grin he'd plastered on his face, only to finally wilt at Shadows unrelenting stare. "…It's nothing. Honest," he finally offered, turning back to look at the town, "It was…just a dream."
"A dream?" Shadow echoed, tone curious.
"Yeah. A really vivid dream," Sonic shrugged, tucking a knee against his chest to lean his chin on, "It just…it messed me up a bit, is all. I'll be okay in a little while. Nothing to worry about."
A grunt was his only response for a long time, the two sitting in companionable silence as the world continued to turn around them.
"…Rose told Rouge that you think it was real," Shadow finally murmured, plucking at the grass. Sonic simply snorted, turning his face away from Shadow. This whole scene felt far too familiar and raw, but also wrong. It made Sonic's skin itch.
"Yeah, well," the hero shrugged, "I said it was vivid, didn't I?"
"Tell me about it."
Sonic turned sharply towards Shadow, who was simply watching him with a neutral expression."…What?"
"Your dream. Tell me about it," Shadow reiterated, tossing a piece of grass into the wind, "I've been told it helps."
Sonic contemplated Shadow for a long beat, before he let out a breath and slowly began to talk. He spoke of the knights, misguided by a dark hearted king, and magic tainted and corrupt. He weaved a tale of heroism, with just a dash of lightheartedness sprinkled in, where good ultimately triumphed over evil, and the heroes got their just rewards in a happy ending. He carefully avoided speaking directly of Lancelot.
When Sonic was done, he almost felt winded, a smile on his face as he trailed off, before letting his hands fall into his lap, a sudden and harsh pang in his chest as he recalled the last night he'd spent in Camelot, curled together with Lancelot, happily discussing their plans for the future; both for themselves and the kingdom. He sucked in a sharp breath to try and ground himself, offering Shadow a strained smile. "And that's it."
The sharp stare he received in return was only somewhat off putting, given that it held no malice, but it still felt to Sonic like Shadow was staring into his very soul. He swallowed thickly, his smile wobbling at the corners. "What?"
"That's not 'it'," Shadow stated bluntly, scrunching his nose and narrowing his eyes at Sonic, "What aren't you telling me?"
The hero opened his mouth to weave another tale, only to deflate as Shadow continued to stare him down, his mouth closing with a quiet click of his teeth. He cast his gaze out towards the horizon, chewing on the inside of his cheek for a moment before finally relenting. "…There was a knight," he began, flicking his gaze to the hybrid briefly, only receiving a flick of Shadow's wrist as if telling him to continue. "He-we…He was the most loyal knight. First to the black king, and then to me. He was steadfast by my side, and we got close. Really close. Uhm," he cleared his throat, feeling a flush creep up his neck for speaking to Shadow about this, of all people, "Once the king was defeated, he confessed his feelings to me, and…yeah."
"So, you're not sad about leaving Camelot. You're sad about leaving him," Shadow rather astutely observed, arching a brow at the hero, who could feel his cheeks burn.
"I mean-!" Sonic started off sounding offended, only to click his tongue and nod slightly, his shoulders slumping, "Yeah. It feels like I abandoned him, y'know? Like I abandoned all of them, after promising I would help them. I know Tails and Amy are fully convinced it was just a dream, and I probably sound crazy, but I was starting to plan a life for myself there! It was…it was going to be good."
"Even if it was just a dream, it still meant something to you," Shadow murmured, his head tilted back to watch the clouds as the floated across the sky, "Your brain can't always tell what's real and what's not in dreams. Even if everything you told me was some fantasy your mind conjured up, it still made you feel something. That's irrefutably true." He tipped his head to regard Sonic from the corner of his eye. "Tell me about him. Your knight."
"Are you sure? It's…well, it's sappy, mostly. Doesn't really seem like something you'd want to hear."
"Just tell me, hedgehog. Before I change my mind."
"Alright, alright," Sonic chuckled, curling his arms around his knees and resting his chin on them again. "Well…he was brave, obviously. And strong. I think I already said it, but he was the strongest knight in the entire kingdom. He was smart as a whip, too. Called me on my bullshit and kept everyone in line. But he was also kind, and sweet. He had a big heart. He was handsome, too…"
"…you loved him."
Sonic contemplated skirting the question or outright lying, but he couldn't bring himself to do so. "With my whole heart."
Silence hung between the two hedgehogs after that simple statement, though it wasn't uncomfortable or strained. The gentle spring wind swirled around them, carrying the smell of freshly bloomed flowers. Sonic's heart gave a hard thump in his chest as tears threatened to gather in his eyes. He buried his face in his knees, taking a deep, shuddering breath to try and keep them at bay. With a shaky voice, he murmured into quietly into his knees, "His name was Lancelot."
"I'm sorry."
Sonic sniffed, wiping at his face as he lifted it from his knees. "What for?"
Shadow tilted his head this way and that, before lying back in the grass to properly stare up at the clouds, hands folded over his belly. "Isn't that what you say to someone when they've lost someone they love?"
Sonic flopped back into the grass next to Shadow, finally allowing a couple of tears to escape from his eyes, "I suppose so, yeah." He startled when he felt fingers intertwine with his own in the grass, turning his head to find Shadow still staring up at the clouds. He let a tiny, lopsided smile curl his lips, before turning back to the sky, Lance's words speaking of souls intertwined echoing in his mind.
Maybe, just maybe, the future he had been planning with Lancelot wasn't completely lost. That thought lifted at least a little bit of the weight from his grieving heart as he shifted a bit closer to Shadow in the grass. His smile grew as the hybrid lifted a hand to point out a cloud.
"That one looks like a rabbit."
"Yeah. It kinda does."
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