#a 5/5 national sweep is fucking CRAZY

[erikahenningsen]

Simone Biles (most all-time)

[optimistredsox]

4 July, BOS @ MIA, 6-5, win, 12th inning

We hadn't had a rollercoaster in some fucking time but what better way to celebrate what must've been the most reflective and subdued Independence Day (considering the rampant rat-fucking shit-fuckery of the Supreme Court at the moment) in living memory than having a proper hold-your-hands-in-the-air-and-shriek-on-the-big-dips rollercoaster of a day game in Miami. Holy shit. Nick Pivetta rocks up and nearly throws a no-no but then the Sox blow the lead and the collective hearts of Red Sox Nation drop like that crazy bit on Space Mountain. Of course, the rollercoaster only really started in the 8th, when the Marlins evened it all up. Before then it was edge-of-the-seat potential no-no watch. What a ride. Anyway, we got the sweep and plenty of bright sides to boot.

Nick Pivetta joins Kutter Crawford (still his real name) and Brayan Bello in the bounce back from a shitty start with a dominating performance club. Dude gave up one hit and two walks over seven innings and left the Sox 2-0 up. Carried a no-no into the seventh. Shook off his previous rough outing like a pro should do. It was pretty great. Shame he didn't get the W because he deserved it. He struck out ten and managed to induce 15 swings and misses.

Dave Hamilton and Tyler O'Neill rocked not one but TWO double steals. The first in the first inning put the Sox ahead 1-0 to kick things off after Raffy knocked Hamilton in with a RBI groundout. Then they did it again in the sixth and Raffy grounded Hamilton in AGAIN with a groundout.

Tyler O'Neill also went 3-for-5 with a run scored and 2 RBIs, one of which was the game-winning RBI.

Jarren Duran was only 1-for-6 but he fired a bullet in the ninth from centre field to throw out Sánchez trying to take home on a single. That would've been a walkoff Marlins win, but not on Jarren's watch. Way to go. That was an awesome outfield assist.

Raffy managed to get 2 RBIs in spite of an uncharacteristic 0fer. He also walked three times.

We won! We had the lead, gave it up, got it back, gave it up, then got it back again and kept it. All from the 8th to the 12th inning. Baseball is fucking great.

We swept the Marlins!

We're pretty good in Florida this season!

Let's go kick the shit out of the Yankees!

[frozenartscapes]

I think Verdant Wind being added as Silver Snow copy paste dragged down the development. If VW wasn't added, then SS, CF, and AM could have all been more fleshed out (so Edelgard could have been shown killing Thales personally and Dimitri's arc would be gradual instead of him going from batshit crazy to "good boy" instantly). So I think either VW should have not been made or SS was scrapped and Claude could actually get a story about him.

So here's what I'm thinking for Verdant Wind, because honestly if it were up to me it would be a total overhaul, and if put into the context of the game's development might have had to be a DLC or something if they were as pressed for time as it seems.

You pick Claude and the Golden Deer and the first half of the game follows many of the same story beats. (Though one thing I would like to see in White Clouds is more opportunities to interact with the other Houses outside of free time, like maybe a couple missions where two houses are sent to the same place to back each other up. This would then allow for supports to form between characters who might not necessarily be in the same house).

Shit goes down, Edelgard is revealed to be the Flame Emperor, war is declared, Byleth falls into a ravine for 5 years.

You come back and things are in a similar place as they start off in VW. You meet Claude at the monastery, he fills you in on what's been going on, and you decide that action needs to taken. However, that action is not "let's go to war too" but instead more of a diplomatic move. You decide to meet with Edelgard in a parlay at Grondor and she initially accepts, but when you both arrive you discover Dimitri has come with an army of his own. Not believing this isn't some sort of ambush on Claude's part, Edelgard calls the parlay off and initiates the battle of Grondor. However, this time you and Claude decide to stop Dimitri and successfully manage to intervene in the Kingdom's attack. Edelgard and her forces still retreat back to Enbarr but Dimitri is able to be captured and (eventually) reasoned with. (In this version Dimitri hasn't fully lost it like he does in AM. He still has some old friends and supports so he doesn't end up completely feral. He's still deeply distrusting of Edelgard but he at least agrees to help Claude find out a motive before killing her).

The attack on Fort Merceus is basically the same. You succeed in seizing it only for the whole thing to be blown up by the Javelins. Everyone manages to escape, though, including notable people from Edelgard's army. They are just as confused and horrified about the strike as you and your team.

Edelgard isn't up for talking this time around so you are forced to lay siege to Enbarr. This also plays out very similarly to VW, but the end cutscene is different. First, Claude is there. Then, rather than killing Edelgard, you extend a hand out to her, instead. She's hesitant, but Claude manages to convince her that there are no schemes this time. They just want to talk. He mentions the Javelins and how even her own army didn't seem to know what they were. When she blanches at the mention, he realizes that these "allies" of hers aren't exactly the most trustworthy of people.

Edelgard then reluctantly tells you, Claude, and Dimitri about Thales and TWSITD. She's hesitant because this is all sensitive information but she doesn't have much to lose at this point, what with Claude's army basically occupying Enbarr. She reveals what happened to her and her family, why she has two Crests, and why she's been forced to work with Thales. It's Dimitri who approaches first once she's finished, moving quickly and reaching out a hand before anyone can react. Edelgard flinches but instead of going for her neck, his hand comes to rest gently on her shoulder. "Where is that monster?" Dimitri hisses, "So I can tear his head from his body."

Once the three leaders form a tentative alliance, Edelgard reveals where Rhea has been hidden. She tells them all that she tried to keep her from too much harm, but she didn't have much control over the situation. Rhea is released and initially weak from imprisonment. She is also briefed on what happened to Edelgard, and why she started the war in the first place.

With a new target in mind, the alliance of nations storm Shambhala. Rhea has been healed up enough to aid in this battle. You defeat Thales, and he responds by launching all the Javelins he can. Rhea goes on to intercept them as she does in the game, but this time things go differently. Hubert points out that as long as Thales has a hand on the rune activating the Javelins, they'll keep coming. So Edelgard charges him along with Dimitri. The two cut through any mage who tries to stop them, and ultimately Edelgard sees vengeance for herself and her family by killing Thales herself. This halts the Javelins before they become too overwhelming for Rhea, and she returns, a little hurt but ok.

Everyone returns to Garreg Mach for celebrations, and also political discussions because there are a lot of things that now need to be covered. Rhea reveals everything about the Nabateans, Crests, and the Relics. Once she learns the true history of Fodlan, Edelgard makes her case for her own goals. She still believes that society should move away from putting so much importance on Crests, especially now that she knows where they truly came from. But she admits that uniting the land under one banner and disbanding the Church entirely would be taking things too far. Dimitri agrees with Edelgard, despite some protests from Faerghus officials. But he decides that the Hero's Relics have served their purpose and it is time they let the souls of the dead rest. Claude is insistent on Fodlan opening up to other nations, to which the other leaders agree, too. Rhea also decides that it is time she steps away from being Archbishop, but she does not appoint Byleth to the role.

A messenger then interrupts with news that a strange and powerful army is currently sweeping across Fodlan. They connect the dots and realize that it is Nemesis. They all decide to confront him as a group, showing off the might of a Fodlan united under peace. Rhea, fearful of mass casualties, tells Byleth what she did when they were a baby, explaining why they have the Crest of Flames and can wield the Sword of the Creator. There isn't a lot of time to unpack all of that because Nemesis is basically at their door, but Byleth still thanks Rhea for telling them.

They confront Nemesis all as one united front and defeat him. There are many parallels in cutscenes that call back the first cutscene of the game. The difference this time is that Rhea isn't facing Nemesis alone. In the last cutscene after defeating him in gameplay, Claude's arrow fake-out kicks things off, but it also includes Edelgard, Dimitri, and Rhea charging him alongside Byleth. In the end, Nemesis is run-through by the Sword of the Creator, the Sword of Seiros, Aymr, Areadbhar, and a bolt from Failnaught. He goes down, his army dissolves into dust, and victory is finally secured.

After that it's revealed what happens in Fodlan: each nation stays as their own land. Dimitri takes his place as the King of Faerghus and works on moving the kingdom away from knighthood and militaristic practices. He devotes more time and money to revitalizing the land and towns, building better roads between cities, and expanding education and other important services. Edelgard also works on fixing and providing social services like education and healthcare to the Adrestian people. She forms a strong alliance with the other nations, utilizing the fact that Adrestia has so much viable farmland to ensure no one goes hungry. She also grants Brigid its freedom, and works closely with Seteth and Rhea in Church reformations. Claude leaves Fodlan to take his place as King of Almyra, though he promises to visit often. Lorenz takes over the Alliance, and like the other two leaders works diligently to provide a better life for his people. Rhea eventually steps away from her role as Archbishop. She does offer it to Byleth, but you get a choice as to whether or not you want to take it. If you don't Rhea says she understands and that Seteth will take on a temporary position until a human can be found to carry on the legacy. She agrees that an immortal being shouldn't hold that kind of power forever.

There's one final cinematic cutscene in which every character with a Hero's Relic solemnly returns it to the Holy Tomb, with Byleth laying the Sword of the Creator last. They glance up at the Throne with all the characters visible behind them, and they smile.

Now Sothis can finally rest.

---

A couple other fun things that could be included in this route:

Because of the mentioned supports between houses, it is possible to s-support any of the House Leaders, not just Claude in this route

To make things extra fun, every unit could potentially be playable in the final battle

Edelgard and Thales can have special dialogue where she basically tells him to go fuck himself before killing him with the axe he gave her

None of the Black Eagles who stay with Edelgard would actually die in the siege on Enbarr, but would have unique "oh no I've been captured" quotes

The cutscene with Edelgard's surrender could start exactly like it does in SS/VW so if people saw that first, they would at first think she was going to die. This would then make Byleth extending a hand out in peace that much more impactful

Every now and then Dimitri and Edelgard could make a comment about how odd it is to be working with each other, and how they are still surprised neither one of them died after all those years of war, a BIG wink to the camera regarding the other routes where one or both of them don't make it

Claude can bring in Nader and other Almyran reinforcements for the final battle, and as a result could result in unique battle quotes from Rhea and Nader with the two of them commending each other and realizing that tensions need not be so high between their nations

Because different supports can happen between houses, there isn't as much pressure to recruit everyone by the end of White Clouds

There could be different paralogues for characters, along with ones already in the game that might be route specific. Dimitri's paralogue where he takes on Cornelia can be a side event that helps strengthen the Kingdom's army in future battles. Bernadetta/Petra's paralogue would allow for allies from Brigid to join in future battles. Edelgard could get a new paralogue where they have to sweep out the last remnants of various TWS labs and lairs, and it's made clear just how bad it had been for her.

Like, I know this is a lot, and executing it as a playable section of the game would be a lot of work. This is all just hypothetical, of course. This would be what I would recommend for the game, but as I say this just know that I don't expect any of this to actually be made. These are just some ideas for how VW could theoretically be changed.

The game would still need a route for Claude, as he is one of the three main choices at the very start of the game. I don't necessarily think SS should be removed, either, because that choice of "kill or don't kill edelgard" is still an incredibly poignant moment that would be lost if SS was gone. But I do wish VW or SS played out differently or at the very least used different cutscenes. The fact that Edelgard dies the same way twice kind of sucks. (This, on top of Dimitri dying off-screen multiple times and Rhea basically being kneecapped and not useful in 3/4 routes)

But I like Claude's route being a Golden Route. It is the Golden Deer after all.

[woozisnoots]

modernized pucca*!hoshi au aka hoshi is a delivery boy being clingy

° pairing: hoshi x reader ° word count: 1.1k ° genre: fluff ° warnings: foul language, mild violence ° a/n: terms with a * are explained below

masterlist!

it’s five in the morning when your alarm woke you up

and first you think what,, the fuck? why??

you did nothing to deserve this

but then you realize it’s monday fUNday

then you’re like,,, fuck i gotta gO

you live alone in small apartment downtown since you moved out of your parent’s place a couple years back

bUT just a couple of months ago your parents crashed their car into a tree

… yeah you don’t know how that happened either

nor do you think you wanna know?

so like now they don’t have a car

your lil siblings are afraid of any public transportation

and their house might as well be on a remote island bc anywhere else is too far for them to just walk

so being the a n g e l that you are, you offer to drive their parents to work in the morning AND your siblings to and from school

in exchange for money of course

bc that’s about an hour to drive to their place and you need GAS

also bc like you’re a national winning karate champ and you need new equipment

bobs* + safe guards + weapons = 5-6 digits worth of mula,, no big deal

so you drive to their place, take your parents to work, and drop off the kiddos to school, thanking the gods above that you got their just in time

you hang at your parent’s place until you have to pick up your siblings later

there’s like 8 hours to kill before you gotta pick ‘em up so you decide to train

some of your old equipment was left at your parent’s place so you decide to use those

you also greatly appreciate the fact that you left a katana in the hands of a nine year old child :)

fastforward, it’s been a couple of hours,, water is leaving your body via sweat (gross) and you’re incredibly famished

you don’t wanna use up gas so you call up a delivery from a chinese restaurant that your parents recommended

do you all see where this is going :)

you take your training outside and start working footwork and punch combinations

“you should try front punch, back punch, back fist!! that one’s always a classic!”

startled, you look over your shoulder and spot your eyes on a,,, uhhm quite,, cute boy standing just over on the other side of the fence

if it weren’t for his tiger printed cardigan

“are you the delivery boy?”

“yes ma’am :)”

“alright how much do i owe you?”

“for you? nothing but i would like to kiss you on the cheek tho” ;)

...excuse you what :)

you laugh it off and just give him a 20 and respond with “keep the change” as you take your food and started heading inside

before you could place one foot passed the door you heard him yell, “i guess i’ll see you later!!”

confused, creeped out, and slightly dare you say,, excited? to see him again?? whatever the heck he meant?

then that feeling started to dwindle once you realized that this boy has just been coming by the house to give you food

every

thirty

minutes

for the past

three

hours.

doESNT HE HAVE AN ACTUAL JOB

for the entire week, that was the routine

you wouldn’t even call for food,, he was just already there

and now you have mountains of food in the kitchen fOR NO REASON

friday came and it was time for you to pick up the kids from school and as you start to leave you see,, him coming towards the house

getting in your car as fast as you can, you yell, “I’M LEAVING PLEASE JUST LEAVE THE FOOD ON THE DOORSTEP AND NEVER. COME. BACK. maybe wait a month. THANKS.”

and off you went

,,,but there he stayed

and to makes things more incredibly weird, you’re siblings seemed to know him?? like they did this (secret) handshake and gave him hugs?

so you ask one of them how they knew this hamster looking, tiger obsessed freak?

apparently he’s always the one that delivers to their house, known to be really nice and give extra food, sometimes even invites him to play inside if it’s his last delivery

“so do you guys normally order this much food or does he just have a soft spot for you guys?”

“what the hell no!! even on our regular days, he doesn’t give this much extra food. and we’re his favorite”

well you be damned

you decide to leave it be and head back outside to clean up the equipment

out of NOWHERE,,, once again

this boi transports himself in front of you to ask for you guys to spar

,,,ahahaha what? “you’re shitting me? why would i want to do that?”

“bc i like you :)”

“…”

“if i get you to the ground, i get to kiss on the cheek. deal?”

this crazy ass motherf***** “yeah no. i don’t want to be responsible for any injuries that you might acquire after this encounter”

“bet :)”

tired of his bullshit, you dropped the boxing gloves to the floor and drove a straight front punch to catch him off guard

to your surprise, he was able to move to the outside at the 10:30*

and now he’s directly behind in which you delivered a back elbow

but ya still didn’t hit ‘em

and he’s not striking back

frustrated, you started throwing random strikes to different targets that were opened

hook punch to the kidney

uppercut the jaw

back fist to the temple

roundhouse kick to the IT band,,, THE IT BAND FFS

he dodged them all and you were getting tired

annoyance fills your body as you unintentionally throw a haymaker* aiming for the side of his head

and jUST LIKE THAT you knew the fight was already over

bc bitch you just gave him the opportunity to move in, stop your punch, and wrap your arm around

just the position for him to take you down

(insert ‘take you down’ by chris brown)

and he in fact,,, did (ya loser) with a sweep of a leg

“the names soonyoung by the way. lots of people call me hoshi tho. but you,,, can call me tiger” ;) cRIngE

before you got the chance to get up and potentially smack the cute smile plastered on his face

you see his figure bend down and plants a small kiss on your cheek

and you didn’t need the faint sound of your siblings giggling in the background to know that you face had turned bright red

pucca: a Canadian-South Korean animated tv series revolving around pucca, a girl who is in love with a ninja named garu

bobs: a punching dummy shaped like a human being (they’re all named bob... all of them)

10:30 angle: imagine looking ahead and you move forward to the 45 degree to your left :) it’s confusing i know 

haymaker: like an exaggerated hook punch,,, like the ones that high school teenagers throw in movies  

[wrunic]

How to Write an Accurate Lifeguard AU

So! It’s summer, which means everyone is writing lifeguarding AUs, and I, a lifeguard, am subjected to the same common mistakes being written over and over, so I’ve taken it upon myself to inform the public as best I can, because information is the best gift you can give anyone, especially a writer.

Before we begin, a PSA: I’m Canadian, so my information is valid primarily in Canada, and might be slightly different in other countries. I also guard at an outdoor summer pool, so my experience (and my advice) will be focused on how to write that experience, though I will talk a bit about guarding lakes and beaches. Cool? Cool! Let’s go!

Least to Most Dangerous Places to Guard:

Outdoor Pools: Low incident levels. Good visibility in the water, lots of people on shift at once, limited area for people to swim. Especially if you work at a private pool, like me, where people have to pay a membership fee, and are generally strong/experienced swimmers unlikely to experience a drowning incident.

Lakes (at a dock): Higher incident levels, and lower visibility in the water. With the added presence of things like rocks and branches in the water, injuries to feet are common. Drowning incidents are more common because it’s more difficult to tell where the bottom is, and you’ll probably be getting less experienced swimmers. Docks have a tendency to be very slippery, so you’ll probably get a few people hurting themselves there too. (Fun fact, if a lifeguard tells you not to run, it’s because they don’t want you to slip! We’re not just doing it to be annoying, spinal injuries and concussions are no fun for anyone.) Even if the area people are allowed to swim in is limited, people are liable to ignore it, which poses an added danger.

Beaches (with waves): Highest incident levels. The ocean is not to be fucked with. Visibility is low, and currents and tides are liable to drag even strong swimmers out. It’s actually not as uncommon as you’d hope for lifeguards trying to help a drowning victim to end up needing to be saved themselves. Beaches also attract a lot of people, which means there are a lot of people to keep track of, many of whom might not be strong swimmers, or might even be complete non-swimmers. Again, even if the area is limited, people might ignore it. A lifeguard working at a beach will be very good at their job.

And that pretty much exhausts my knowledge of things that aren’t outdoor pools. Everything from here on out will apply to those specifically.

The Basics:

1. If someone is on chair, they aren’t going to be talking to anyone

When you’re on chair, you’re watching the pool. You have to be paying attention, because you’re the one who’s supposed to notice an incident if it happens. Unless you want to show a lifeguard being terrible at their job, they won’t be chatting while watching the pool. Shifts on chair usually last fifteen minutes at one chair, fifteen minutes at the next, with two people guarding simultaneously, though this varies depending on the pool.

2. Lifeguards are not doctors, but they aren’t useless either

Lifeguards are trained in first aid, which means we know how to treat basic injuries, perform CPR, and use a spinal board. More often than not, if there’s a major incident, we’re calling 911. However, we do have to training. Where I live, the required qualifications are a Bronze Medallion Certification, a Bronze Cross Certification, a First Aid Certification, and a National Lifeguard Certification. It took me three years to be fully qualified. The qualifications in the U.S aren’t as strenuous, but I’m not an expert, so if you have a specific area you want to look into, I suggest doing it.

3. If your character is bad with kids, they’ll be a bad lifeguard

They don’t have to be amazing, but they should be able to treat a child with at least basic courtesy. You have to spend a lot of time with kids, usually injured ones, and if you’re not good at dealing with them, you’re screwed. More often than not, lifeguards are also swim instructors and coaches, (I teach swimming lessons and the U8 synchronized swimming team) so that’s even more kids. If you just want a very simple “they only watch the pool” lifeguard, that’s also a thing, and you’ll be able to ignore later sections of this post. Nevertheless, your lifeguard should still be at least okay with kids.

4. No swearing on shift

Like I mentioned, we work with kids. That also means we have to deal with crazy parents (more on that later) and they don’t like when people swear around their kids. So, no swearing at the pool! It’s a small detail, but it does a lot for realism.

5. Crazy parents

Pool parents are all the worst parts of entitled people yelling at retail workers, overprotective helicopter parents, and ridiculously competitive parents trying to relive their glory days through their children. They can also be really cool, but showing your character having to navigate dealing with an angry parent is, again, good realism, and a fun character  and relationship building tool! Lifeguards talk trash about crazy parents all the time, so if you’re writing a group, it’s a great way to show them bonding. They won’t do it on shift though (same deal as the swearing, you’ll get in trouble)

6. Not all lifeguards are equal

There is a hierarchy within the pool staff. The more years you work at a pool, the more you get payed, the better your shifts are, and the more say you get in the way the pool is run. You’ll never be fully in charge (the pool is usually managed by a committee of parents and owned by the city) but you get more responsibilities. We have supervisors we send troublesome members to, and newbies who get the worst shifts.

7. It’s not all sitting on a chair watching the pool

Lifeguards aren’t just lifeguards. They’re also custodians, teachers, and coaches. We clean the bathrooms and garbages, we sweep the deck, we vacuum the bottom of the pool, we skim the bugs off the surface, we put all the chairs and floaties away at the end of the day. That’s pretty universal, but beyond that is where things start getting more specialized, because I live in an area where most families basically live at their summer pools. I’m not sure if it’s even like this in other parts of Canada. However, if you want to add some excitement (and cute kids) to your story or AU, this is the way to do it.

I mentioned earlier that I teach swimming lessons. Everyone who wants to work as a lifeguard in my area has to take an additional course where they learn to teach the various levels of swimming lessons. If you want to get even more elaborate, pools also usually have swim teams, diving teams, synchro teams and waterpolo teams, along with things like aquafit and free swim. Adding any of those into your mix could be a fun twist on relationships, since there’s joking rivalry between a lot of the sports (especially synchro and waterpolo). Additional interaction with kids, parents, and young teenagers will be required if you plan on throwing any of these in.

8. The swimsuits are the uniform

This isn’t a huge thing, but it’s important. You have to potentially save a life in that suit. It’s going to be practical. For girls, if you’re teaching, it’s a one piece, but if you’re on chair it’s usually a bikini, which generally looks like some very full coverage underwear and a practical sports bra. Guys have swim trunks. You also aren’t allowed to wear shoes on shift, (other than flip-flops) because swimming in shoes is nigh on impossible.

9. The staff is super close

There’s drama sometimes, sure, but you have to spend your entire summer with these people. You see them every day, whether you’re working or going out together. You have bonding days, you see each other in swimsuits more often than clothes, you deal with the same annoying parents and maintenance problems. You’ve probably seen everyone drunk or at least dealing with other staff members being drunk. You go out regularly, (lifeguard parties are real, and most mornings at least half our staff is hungover) you exchange secrets and embarrassing stories during slow shifts. These are your best friends from June to September. They’re your family.

10. To be a lifeguard, you have to REALLY want it

I’ve talked about all the courses, the crazy parents, and the sheer amount of things you have to do, so this should be pretty clear. But in case you needed to be convinced further, my manager said at one of our staff meetings that they’re “trying to make sure no one’s working more than fifty hours a week”. We work all the time, in the blazing summer heat, doing a job that ranges from boring to wonderful to absolutely terrifying. If you aren’t guarding you’re teaching, if you aren’t teaching you’re coaching, if you aren’t coaching you’re actually still coaching except it’s at a different pool for a competition. It’s a lot, but if you love it, you really love it.

And Finally, a Breakdown of Why I Hate the “Fake Drowning to Get CPR” Trope

Putting aside the consent issues, it’s also stupid, and here’s why:

CPR is only performed on unconscious, non-breathing victims. That means you’d have to fake being unconscious, and hold your breath through the entire process, which is impossible. Believe me, playing victim in training is hard. Not to mention, you can’t stop your own heart, and we monitor heart rate.

Lets say you were able to fake it. It’s at this point that this bad boy come into play:

This is a pocket mask. You put it over a victim’s mouth to avoid direct mouth to mouth contact, because, you know, ew.

Now, pretend there was no pocket mask and you really think getting air violently blown into your mouth before having your ribs broken by someone desperately trying to restart your heart is a good way to get a “kiss” from the hot lifeguard. Bad news: it might not be them doing breaths.

Removing an unconscious person from the pool is hard, and is usually a two person job. So even if the object of your affections is the one getting you out of the water, they might be the one doing compressions, while the person who helped with the removal does breaths.

They’ll also be wearing gloves the whole time, because CPR can sometimes make people vomit, and they might have to scoop the vomit out of your mouth.

Romantic, right?

But wait, it gets worse, because there’s no way you’d get that far. You’d get caught as soon as they checked your breathing, your heart rate, or your consciousness level. Depending on at what point they caught you, EMS might already have been contacted, at which point you’d have several lifeguards and a whole crew of paramedics absolutely furious at you, and probably a ban from the pool.

Moral of the story, don’t do it.

Hope this was helpful to someone!

[boreothegoldfinch]

chapter 5 paragraph xx

Boris and I lay on the floor in front of the television at my house, eating potato chips and drinking vodka, watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade. It was snowing in New York. A number of balloons had just passed— Snoopy, Ronald McDonald, SpongeBob, Mr. Peanut—and a troupe of Hawaiian dancers in loincloths and grass skirts was performing a number in Herald Square. “Glad that’s not me,” said Boris. “Bet they’re freezing their arses off.” “Yeah,” I said, though I had no eyes for the balloons or the dancers or any of it. To see Herald Square on television made me feel as if I were stranded millions of light-years from Earth and picking up signals from the early days of radio, announcer voices and audience applause from a vanished civilization. “Idiots. Can’t believe they dress like that. They’ll end up in hospital, those girls.” As fiercely as Boris complained about the heat in Las Vegas, he also had an unshakable belief that anything “cold” made people ill: unheated swimming pools, the air-conditioning at my house, and even ice in drinks. He rolled over on his back and passed me the bottle. “You and your mother, you went to this parade?” “Nah.” “Why not?” said Boris, feeding Popper a potato chip. “Nekulturny,” I said, a word I’d picked up from him. “And too many tourists.” He lit a cigarette, and offered me one. “Are you sad?” “A little,” I said, leaning in to light it from his match. I couldn’t stop thinking about the Thanksgiving before; it kept playing and re-playing like a movie I couldn’t stop: my mother padding around barefoot in old jeans with the knees sprung out, opening a bottle of wine, pouring me some ginger ale in a champagne glass, setting out some olives, turning up the stereo, putting on her holiday joke apron, and unwrapping the turkey breast she’d bought us in Chinatown, only to wrinkle her nose and start back at the smell—“Oh God, Theo, this thing’s gone off, open the door for me”—eyewatering ammonia reek, holding it out before her like an undetonated grenade as she ran with it down the fire stairs and out to the garbage can on the street while I—leaning out from the window—made gleeful retching noises from on high. We’d eaten an austere meal of canned green beans, canned cranberries, and brown rice with toasted almonds: “Our Vegetarian Socialist Thanksgiving,” she’d called it. We’d planned carelessly because she had a project due at work; next year, she promised (both of us tired from laughing; the spoiled turkey had for some reason put us in an hilarious mood), we were renting a car and driving to her friend Jed’s in Vermont, or else making reservations someplace great like Gramercy Tavern. Only that future had not happened; and I was celebrating my alcoholic potato-chip Thanksgiving with Boris in front of the television.

“What are we going to eat, Potter?” said Boris, scratching his stomach. “What? Are you hungry?” He waggled his hand sideways: comme ci, comme ça. “You?” “Not especially.” The roof of my mouth was scraped raw from eating so many chips, and the cigarettes had begun to make me feel ill. Suddenly Boris howled with laughter; he sat up. “Listen,” he said— kicking me, pointing to the television. “Did you hear that?” “What?” “The news man. He just wished happy holiday to his kids. ‘Bastard and Casey.’ ” “Oh, come on.” Boris was always mis-hearing English words like this, aural malaprops, sometimes amusing but often just irritating. “ ‘Bastard and Casey!’ That’s hard, eh? Casey, all right, but call his own kid ‘Bastard’ on holiday television?” “That’s not what he said.” “Fine, then, you know everything, what did he say?” “How should I know what the fuck?” “Then why do you argue with me? Why do you think you always know better? What is the problem with this country? How did so stupid nation get to be so arrogant and rich? Americans… movie stars… TV people… they name their kids like Apple and Blanket and Blue and Bastard and all kind of crazy things.” “And your point is—?” “My point is like, democracy is excuse for any fucking thing. Violence… greed… stupidity… anything is ok if Americans do it. Right? Am I right?” “You really can’t shut up, can you?” “I know what I heard, ha! Bastard! Tell you what. If I thought my kid was a bastard I would sure the fuck name him something else.” In the fridge, there were wings and taquitos and cocktail sausages that Xandra had brought home, as well as dumplings from the strip-mall Chinese where my father liked to eat, but by the time we actually got around to eating, the bottle of vodka (Boris’s contribution to Thanksgiving) was already half gone and we were well on our way to being sick. Boris—who sometimes had a serious streak when he was drunk, a Russianate bent for heavy topics and unanswerable questions—was sitting on the marble countertop waving around a fork with a cocktail sausage speared on it and talking a bit wildly about poverty and capitalism and climate change and how fucked up the world was.

At some disoriented point, I said: “Boris, shut up. I don’t want to hear this.” He’d gone back to my room for my school copy of Walden and was reading aloud a lengthy passage that bolstered some point he was trying to make. The thrown book—luckily a paperback—clipped me in the cheekbone. “Ischézni! Get out!” “This is my house, you ignorant fuck.” The cocktail sausage—still impaled on the fork—sailed past my head, missing me narrowly. But we were laughing. By mid-afternoon we were completely wrecked: rolling around on the carpet, tripping each other, laughing and swearing, crawling on hands and knees. A football game was on, and though it was an annoyance to both of us it was too much trouble to find the remote and change the channel. Boris was so hammered he kept trying to talk to me in Russian. “Speak English or shut up,” I said, trying to catch myself on the banister, and ducking his swing so clumsily I crashed and fell into the coffee table. “Ty menjá dostál! Poshël ty!” “Gobble gobble gobble,” I replied in a whiny girl voice, face down in the carpet. The floor was rocking and bucking like the deck of a ship. “Balalaika pattycake.” “Fucking télik,” said Boris, collapsing on the floor beside me, kicking out ridiculously at the television. “Don’t want to watch this shite.” “Well I mean, fuck”—rolling over, clutching my stomach—“I don’t either.” My eyes weren’t tracking right, objects had halos that shimmered out beyond their normal boundaries. “Let’s watch weathers,” said Boris, wading on his knees across the living room. “Want to see the weathers in New Guinea.” “You’ll have to find it, I don’t know what channel.” “Dubai!” exclaimed Boris, collapsing forward on all fours—and then, a mushy flow of Russian in which I caught a swear word or two. “Angliyski! Speak English.” “Is snowing there?” Shaking my shoulder. “Man says is snowing, crazy man, ty videsh?! Snowing in Dubai! A miracle, Potter! Look!” “That’s Dublin, you ass. Not Dubai.” “Valí otsyúda! Fuck off!” Then I must have blacked out (an all-too-typical occurrence when Boris brought a bottle over) because the next I knew, the light was completely different and I was kneeling by the sliding doors with a puddle of puke on the carpet beside me and my forehead pressed to the glass. Boris was fast asleep, face down and snoring happily, one arm dangling off the sofa. Popchik was sleeping too, chin resting contentedly on the back of Boris’s head. I felt rotten. Dead butterfly floating on the surface of the pool. Audible machine hum. Drowned crickets and beetles swirling in the plastic filter baskets. Above, the setting sun flared gaudy and inhuman, blood-red shelves of cloud that suggested end-times footage of catastrophe and ruin: detonations on Pacific atolls, wildlife running before sheets of flame.

I might have cried, if Boris wasn’t there. Instead, I went in the bathroom and vomited again and then after drinking some water from the tap came back with paper towels and cleaned up the mess I’d made even though my head hurt so much I could barely see. The vomit was an awful orange color from the barbecue chicken wings and hard to get up, it had left a stain, and while I scrubbed at it with dish detergent I tried hard to fasten on comforting thoughts of New York—the Barbours’ apartment with its Chinese porcelains and its friendly doormen, and also the timeless backwater of Hobie’s house, old books and loudly-ticking clocks, old furniture, velvet curtains, everywhere the sediment of the past, quiet rooms where things were calm and made sense. Often at night, when I was overwhelmed with the strangeness of where I was, I lulled myself to sleep by thinking of his workshop, rich smells of beeswax and rosewood shavings, and then the narrow stairs up to the parlor, where dusty sunbeams shone on oriental carpets. I’ll call, I thought. Why not? I was still just drunk enough to think it was a good idea. But the telephone rang and rang. Finally—after two or three tries, and then a bleak half hour or so in front of the television—sick and sweating, my stomach killing me, staring at the Weather Channel, icy road conditions, cold fronts sweeping in over Montana—I decided to call Andy, going into the kitchen so I wouldn’t wake Boris. It was Kitsey who picked up the phone.

[megacircuit9universe]

Cage Match

FRI SEP 18 2020

I really did want to keep my posting to just once a week or less. Every time I do one, I risk oversleeping and being late for work the next day.

And today, when I woke up and checked my phone, to see that Trump had announced he was going ahead with the TikTok ban, ordering it to be out of the app stores by Sunday... I figured that could wait until next week to talk about.

Users who already have the app installed on their devices will still be able to use it, and a full crackdown (the execution of which is legally murky) isn’t slated to begin until mid November, after the election... and thus might not happen at all, or... might only be a few months long, should Biden win.

But then, just around sunset, I received a notification on my phone that Ruth Bader Ginsberg had died.

We all knew she was 87, and had been in and out of the hospital battling cancer over the past few years... so this shouldn’t have been too big a shock, but... we all prayed to Jesus, Mary, and God that she would make it to 2021 at least.

Trump has already gotten two conservative justices into the Supreme Court... the first thanks to McConnell refusing to hold any hearings for Obama’s last nominee, Garland, in March of 2016, because a general election was happening in just eight short months... and the second, after Justice Kennedy retired unexpectedly, under shady circumstances.*

Even if it’s not true that Kennedy was pressured to retire by Trump, who had dirt on his son... you cannot say that blocking Garland was fair, unless you agree that it’s also fair now, to hold off on any hearings to replace RBG until after the current general election, which is only six weeks away.

But that didn’t stop Mitch McConnell from coming out only ONE HOUR after the death of RBG today, and saying the Senate will definitely hold confirmation hearings for her replacement as soon as possible.

In the second hour after her death, her body still warm, not yet stiff, Republican trolls went out on Twitter and all other social media, like hounds, released to justify the immediate confirmaton of whoever Trump nominates to replace her, calling to bypass hearings altogether... because look what a circus the Democrats made of the Brett Kavanaugh hearings, right?

Democrats had to immediately strike back, rolling clip after clip of McConnell, and Graham, from 2016... still in their PRESENT TERMS expounding upon the public’s sacred right to have a say in any Supreme Court nomination, so close to a Presidential election.  My oh me... how could anybody disagree?

These are not clips of young Graham and young McConnell from 1996, arguing for impeachment... against their gray haired selves from 2019 saying impeachment is wrong... this was four years ago Graham and McConnell arguing against themselves from earlier in the self-same six-year term they were last elected to... for which both are up today, for reelection.

But the hypocrisy of the impeachment example only serves to magnify the hypocrisy of the moment for both of them. And in the present political climate... with Trump just having been exposed on Tape admitting to a caronavirus cover up, at the cost of hundreds of thousands of lives... voters are keenly taking note.

Both of these guys, two of Trumps top sycophants in the Senate, have enjoyed decades of easy congressional races in safely red states against weak, token opponents who stood no chance of beating them.

But in 2020, that’s not been exactly the case. Both these assholes have had to spend some real money, and sweat a little, as, for the first time in their careers, polls have been showing their opponents within striking distance of unseating them.  And that was before today.

I hinted in the last entry that Trumps exposure by Woodward justified his impeachment.  Why?  He was impeached for holding back despirately needed weapons to an ally, unless he got some falsely manufactured dirt for his reelection in exchange, and he did not care how many Ukranian lives were lost as a result.

But, GOP senators failed to remove him and, when Caronavirus came along a few months later, Trump witheld PPE and ventilators from American governors, and left all American citizens hanging out to dry, even on the basic informational level about the threat... again, for the sake of reelection.

They should have removed him, but they couldn’t, because they’d already removed their testacles and handed them up to him in a slavish offering of cult loyalty... and now, here they are... trying to fuck us over again, in the eleveth hour, to replace a Supreme Court Justice who... even as I write... is days away from having a proper wake... much less a burial.

But this is not just because of slave-ball oaths to an authoritarian spank daddy... the GOP has been salivating about overturning Roe V Wade since long before Trump joined their ranks, and now... like Golem, from LOTR, hissing and salivating over the One Ring... they see it within their grasp!

PRECIOUS!!!

This is why, an hour after her eyes went cold, the 2020 election turned into a no-holds-barred political cage match to the death, tonight.

Dust clouds are billowing... people are breaking kitchen sinks over one anothers heads... spitting out teeth after getting punched... then jumping up to go at it some more.

The big questions here are:

1) What happens to the nation if they do replace Ginsberg immediately?

2) How will this affect the voter turnout on November 3rd?

3) How will the shift in the balance of the Supreme Court affect the outcome of the election, should Trump sue to challenge the results when he loses?

4) How are we all not going to die?

The big answer is... it all depends on how big a win Biden gets on election night.  If biden loses... or it’s too close to call... or  only wins by a slim margin in one state... or only wins by a slim margin in two states... we are all royally fucked up the ass.

If that’s the case, then, even if Ginsberg’s replacement wasn’t already rammed through, he will be, and then the election results will go straight to the new Supreme Court, who will rule in favor of Trump, and then he’ll effectively be King.

Because... with the Supreme Court behind him, and with his second term a go, he’ll invalidate the House and Senate election results in the months before the new House and Senate can come in... and once he’s stacked congress in his favor, he’ll be invincible.

On the other hand...

If Biden wins a decisive victory on November 3rd... over 270 in the Electoral College, with all the states that gave him those electoral votes, having done so by large margins that can’t rationally be contested...

Then even if Trump has replaced Ginsberg, the Supreme Court will refuse to hear any challenges to the election results, and the Military will recognize Biden as President Elect.  The House will continue to resist, having potentially grown stronger, and the lame duck Senate... possibly housing a lot of lame duck Republican Senators, will stand down... taking solace that they packed one extra conservative Justice into the court before their ride was over.

And then, when the new Congress comes in, with Democratic majorities in both houses (because this would be the case if enough Democratic voters turned out to give Biden a decisive victory on election night) they’d expand the number of Supreme Court Justices from 9 to 11... or 13... to mitigate the nighmare scenario where Roe V Wade gets overturned, etc.

So...

Which outcome is more likely?  A solid win for Biden on election night?  Or a contestable win / outright loss for Biden?

Presuming that voter suppression, and foreign tampering are turned up to 11, in favor of Trump... can Democrats so overwhelm the polls that Biden still gets that decisive victory?

Well... in some other year, probably not.

But in 2020, probably yes.

Why?

Well, for starters, all the anti-abortion voters already always vote in every election.  You can’t scare up any more of them to get to the polls, because they’re already, always at 100% attendance... primaries, generals, federal, state, gubenertorial, mayoral, dog-catchorial. 

So, the long awaited (from their perspective) death of evil RGB, will not change that base line.

On the other hand, the long dreaded death of RGB, will bring out legions more young women, between 18 and 35, who do not want Roe V Wade overturned.

The banning of TikTok... which Trump also committed to today... will bring out legions of voters, 18 to 35, who are feeling very keenly the threat to their free speech and expression that this move represents.

And this is on top of all the voters, young and old, who normally don’t vote, who were already champing at the bit to defeat Trump and his junta for a thousand other contemporary reasons, from Covid19, to protest crackdowns, to calling all fallen soldiers suckers and losers, and on.

Very few extra right wing votes will be cast on election night, in comparisson, by crackdown supporters, or people who want to see more denigration of war heros.

In short, the cage match atmosphere that the death of Ruth Bader Ginsberg has now created for this election... Doesn’t do much to help an anti-abortion turnout that’s already maxed out.  But it does motivate pro-choice turnout like crazy, especially among young women who are facing a life of oppression if they don’t get out there.

And that same dynamic goes for all younger voters, and all armchair liberals of older generations... for related reasons.

And these people are overwhelmingly white, and middle to upper class... meaning that voter suppression techniques, and foreign tampering won’t affect them.  They are a sleeping army, immune to such tactics.

Voter suppression targets minority people of color and the poor.  Foreign social engineering techniques target the poorly educated, and mentally ill.

That worked in 2016, when the electorate was snoozing... didn’t want any part of the drama... when Millenials were apathetic, and Gen Z was too young. 

The world has changed in four years.  A lot!

So, it’s time for bed again, but I do see a clear pathway for dramatic change on November 3rd... and the TikTok ban, and the death of RBG only intensify the potential for a sound smack down of Trumpism, and hyper-conservatism.

*Justice Kennedy’s son Justin, who became the head of real estate capital markets at Deutsche Bank, worked closely with Trump in the years before his presidency, swinging him billion dollar loans at a time when no other bank would loan to Trump.  

Such dealings were almost certainly criminal to some degree, and so it is speculated that Justice Kennedy resigned to avoid a scandal.

Calls were made for the Judiciary Committee to investigate, before the Senate held any hearings to nominate Kavanaugh as his replacement, but they were steamrolled.

[brianjameson]

It’s currently windier than shit. It’s been raining on and off since yesterday and it’s a full moon on top of that.

Via Google: “Spiritually, the Pink Moon always signifies rebirth and renewal. After a long winter, the resurgence of the color pink is a revitalizing dose of beauty and joy. It serves as a reminder that life is a set of ups and downs, a cycle of hibernation and reawakening.

  Yesterday (April 7th) was the start of our pink super moon aka the brightest moon we’ll have this year. It was so gorgeous yesterday that I was able to see the pink hue from my part of town when it was rising. It was so gorgeous that I went to Red Rock around 11:30pm to get a closer look at it. I was out there alone laying on the hood of my car listening to my music and just focusing on my intentions. The moon was so fucking clear that I felt like I had another pair of glasses on.

As of the past 2 years I’ve felt this strange connection with the moon and I feel it more so when I go to Red Rock. The feeling I get when I go to Red Rock to visit the moon is like when you’re a child and you’ve had a bad day and just want to cry and so you go to your parents to let it all out and get some answers and hugs. The moon has a strange way of pulling out my emotions and allowing me to release what I need to and ask for the things I want. I feel it embraces me.

When I was driving home around 12:30am there were about 6 SUV cops all huddled at the stoplight right before you get to Red Rock. I have no idea why they were there but I’m pretty sure they were either stopping people from going to Red Rock or asking if people were driving to Pahrump or something of the sort. Crazy how we have so much restriction right now.

Anyways

It has been pretty cloudy lately that it doesn’t even feel like being in Vegas. All I can think about is how locusts might return again the way they did last year. At least this time no one will be out and about to be terrorized by the fucking things.

My allergies have been terrible and this virus comes at such a bad time because you can’t sneeze or cough around people right now without everyone scattering like roaches.

I just took my allergy medicine that I hate taking it because it dries me out completely. I always have to drink so much water and sometimes wake up with a dry throat that makes me think I got the ronez.

It’s been exactly 3 weeks that Nevada has been into its shut down and so far I’ve managed to: Clean and organize my room, shop online for shit I don’t need, drink, read, dance in my underwear all. fucking. day, drink, take selfies, and drink some more.

I think that during the beginning of my quarantine I was going a bit nuts because I was thinking about it a little too much. I’m used to going to bars and restaurants whenever I want at whatever time I want. Since I can’t do all the things I normally do, it’s forcing me to do the things I always wanted to get around to doing. I have the free time now but I’m also reminding myself that it’s also ok to just play on the computer and just relax.

I went as far as ordering an electric guitar and I’ve been watching youtube videos on how to play. Maybe playing guitar is something I should be doing to relieve stress? I’ve just always held myself back because I never had time to play or had anyone to show me how to play. Now just seems like the perfect time to teach myself and just jump into playing.

I’ve been off work now for a month.. I fucking miss my friends/co-workers. Now I’m just chillin like a motha fuckin villain. I can’t do shit to change the situation and things could be a lot worse so I’ve just accepted it for what it is. This situation has fucked up my sleeping schedule completely. I have been going to bed at like 5-6am every night lol. I woke up my nephew today and told him to open his blinds and so he opens them and I was like you realize that it’s 3 in the afternoon right? He straight-up covers himself with his blanket and goes “Yup and?” because he knows we ain’t going to do shit today so I couldn’t even be mad lol.

I’ve enjoyed this time off so I’m not going to complain. I doubt I’ll ever get to rest like this again in my life and it makes me really happy that my mom is resting more. My mom is who I’ve been the most concerned for when it comes to this virus since she’s older but the fact that she’s been resting and just sitting down more instead of constantly doing shit, makes me happy. I’m still in disbelief with how contagious this virus is and how rapidly it’s spreading throughout the world.

It’s just shocking how life was totally normal one day and then the following day I’m moving my things out of the salon and being told to stay inside because of a virus sweeping the nation. How did we go from 0-1000 in 5 seconds?

When I was in Canada it hadn’t even touched Montreal yet. I was still careful about everything I did and touched there but it wasn’t as bad as when I got back. I think a day or 2 after I got back from Montreal is when Italy was hit hard and after that I feel is when everything else in the world started to shut down and go crazy like a domino effect. Luckily I didn’t book my trip even a week after I planned on going because otherwise I would have been stuck in Canada! I would of became a citizen and a hooker! lol.

Overall

I hope that if there’s anything you’ve thought of wanting to do, whether it be learning a new craft, painting the house, learning a new language, then I hope you’re utilizing this time to do that.

If you’re someone who never had time to relax because of work or life etc etc. then I hope that you’re opening a bottle of wine and enjoying your time off because you deserve it and the universe thinks so too.

This is no obligation to do or not do during this time because shit is crazy and if you want to spend your time worrying about the world, then you’re more than allowed to worry about the world…. Just do us a favor and have a drink honey.

Quarantine Chronicles It's currently windier than shit. It's been raining on and off since yesterday and it's a full moon on top of that.

[bloojayoolie]

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[stevenstamkos]

Can you do a primer on julien/pl? I'd love to write fic about them, but I just know bits of pieces from your hcs. But they're both so big and soft????

Hey! So when I started writing we’re not here to take part (we’re here to take over), I didn’t think PL/Julien would be more than a one-off pairing that I’d write once for fun, so it’s been thrilling to find that people are interested in them!

So there honestly isn’t much interaction between the two of them, I’m sad to say. They’re friends, and they’ve been teammates a few times, but the part about them together is gonna be fairly short, sorry! I’d love to tell you about them anyway, bc I love them. I’m so sorry for how long this is. This isn’t a primer, this is an essay with pictures.

Part 1. Pierre-Luc Dubois

A good French-Canadian boy from Rimouski. He was drafted in 2014, 5th overall to the Cape Breton Screaming Eagles (CBSE) in the QMJHL

Look at him, he was so small. He grew up so fast :’) You might know this team as the junior team of a three-time Stanley-Cup winning Penguins goalie who is now in Vegas. Anyway! Luc’s played three seasons in the Q so far, so if he doesn’t make the NHL in 2017-2018, it’s back to juniors he’ll go. Not to Cape Breton though, but we’ll get to that later.

The Eagles are kind of tragic? But they’re good boys. They almost always make the playoffs but they just don’t make it past round 2, rip. Luc loved it there though (at least according to what he said after he found out he got traded).

So he had an incredible season in 2015-2016 leading up to the draft, posting 99 points in 62 games for a neat 1.6 PPG. (HE COULD’VE GOTTEN TRIPLE DIGITS but he got his ASS SUSPENDED for the last game of the season omfg.) This led to him going from a projected mid-to-late first rounder to top 5, and he ended up being selected 3rd overall by the Columbus Blue Jackets in the 2016 draft, to everyone’s surprise. Really, we all thought Puljujarvi was gonna go third. But nope, it was always gonna be Luc.

Btw his draft day suit? Beautiful. Even when I didn’t care about him, I loved it. Please watch the video of his draft just for the jacket lining, if nothing else.

Btw before things get dismal, I want to point out that he has the cutest friendship w my boy Thomas Chabot, bc they’ve played together a lot on national teams, so. Also has an adorable friendship with Evgeny Svechnikov, 10/10 would recommend checking that out

(That’s Svech on the left, and Max Lazarev in the middle)

Anyway Luc got cut from CBJ camp and never played a single game for them, got sent back to CBSE for the 2016-2017 season. And things didn’t go well for him because a few vital core players had left (like Svech) and Luc was not having a good season. He had like, 18 points in 20 games, not even a point per game. People were calling him a bust by like, early December.

Early December is also when he left CBSE briefly to attend Team Canada WJC camp, where he also found out that CBSE had traded him to the Blainville-Boisbriand Armada. And like, Hockey Canada camp was in Boisbriand, literally in BLB’s arena. So I wonder how that felt.

Anyway, we all knew how Team Canada did. Silver. Yeah.

Have this cute photo of Luc talking to Beaner instead.

(People were still calling him a bust though bc he only got 5 assists in 7 games which is Just Not Good Enough for a third overall pick)

So after the WJCs, Luc started playing with the Armada, who were legit contenders (sorry CBSE but it’s the truth) and his production kicked back up: 37 points in 28 games, and he never went more than three games without a point. BLB was like the fifth seeded team in the Q, and Luc led them to the finals. Where they got swept by the Saint John Sea Dogs.

If I had one gif to describe Luc, it would be this one. (x) Oh but there’s also this gifset where you can clearly see him saying “Stop fucking complaining!”

Overall it was a pretty rough year for Luc. WJC silver, got ripped apart by the media, got traded from his team, made it to the finals only to get swept (and not just swept but shut out in Games 2 and 3, too). Awk.

But Luc himself is a sweet, sweet boy, tries to look chill and cool all the time and is mostly successful until he opens his mouth. He’s terrible at baseball and is pretty funny. An incompetent boy, the baby of the family, probably doted on like crazy by his family. So precious to everyone who meets him. Also was super beloved on CBSE before they traded him :( He’s feisty as hell on the ice. 100+ PIM during his draft season, and this season if he didn’t miss so many games bc of WJCs, he prob would’ve done it again or at least gotten close. Just a messy, horrible dork despite his ~suave~ persona.

Part 2. Julien Gauthier

Another good French-Canadian boy, this time from Montreal. He was drafted to the Val-d’Or Foreurs (VDO) in the Q in 2013, 6th overall, so he’s played four seasons there now and is no longer CHL-eligible because of that, so if he doesn’t make the NHL this season, he’s going to be in the AHL.

He comes from a family of body builders. And you can kind of tell.

There’s a whole feature about his family’s bodybuilding.

Anyway. Julien played for VDO since 2013-2014, winning the President’s Cup in his first season. There are pictures of him lifting the Cup, but he was like 16 and he had 24 playoff games’ worth of shitty facial hair, so you can imagine why I’m not putting a pic here.

In the 2016 draft, he was taken 21st overall by the Carolina Hurricanes, their second first-round pick (they took Beaner at 13th). Which sounds pretty good until you remember that he was projected to go like, top 10, and possibly even top 5, but after the midseason his ranking just. dropped? So that probably hurt. But he looked good at the draft and he looked happy, so that’s all that matters

(You can prob tell by now that I am very interested in draft day suits)

So Jules was sent back for the 2016-2017 season, back to VDO. He was doing really well there too, and got invited to play for Team Canada at WJCs where he posted 5 goals and 2 assists. And then immediately after WJCs were over, he got traded to the Saint John Sea Dogs (If you don’t know anything about the CHL, hmu for a more detailed explanation on why the fuck CHL teams trade away their best players).

Here’s the thing to understand about the Sea Dogs this year. They were a fucking juggernaut. They were the top-seeded team and they ate other teams for breakfast. They went 16-2 in the playoffs, sweeping three teams and only losing two games to the Chicoutimi Saguenéens in round 3. (The first time Julien faced VDO, his old team, post-trade was in round 2 and the Sea Dogs swept VDO.) And they swept BLB in the finals and made it look easy, and Julien scored four goals in two games. He only played two games in the finals though bc he got his stupid ass suspended for the final two games.

And then they lost to the Erie Otters in the Memorial Cup semifinal, but I’m allergic to that memory, so here’s Julien lifting the President’s Cup instead

Half his insta captions seem to be emojis, and it seems like 50% of the time when you communicate with him, all you’re gonna get is three emojis in response. They’re probably all goat emojis, bc that’s his nickname. Julien literally says that he uses social media to look at memes and share them with friends. He prob thinks he’s a bad boy but he’s soft as hell.

Everyone likes to tell him how big his body is, or talk to him about how big and thick he is, and he knows about it. (He…definitely knows about it.) He likes fishing and swimming and he has a super cute dog named Rosie. And he has Spongebob sheets.

Oh yes and his tongue is out like 70% of the time (x)

Part 3. Luc/Julien

I sort of made this pairing up on the spot? So there’s like, not a lot, but I can try. First can we talk about how nice they look together though. Luc is 6′3″ and 203 lbs, Julien is 6′4″ and 225 lbs. Okay just wanted to establish that.

I honestly have no idea when’s the first time they met each other, because Canadian boys in the same CHL league seem to all know each other from birth or something. They saw each other around during the 2014-2015 season, when Luc was a rookie and Julien a sophomore. CBSE and VDO aren’t in the same division though, so they only saw each other twice a season. And it was almost always messy lmao bc CBSE? knows no chill. Luc fit in perfectly there 3

They were very briefly teammates during Hockey Canada training camp for the 2016 WJCs, but Luc got cut from the team. Jules made it as the only undrafted guy, but Canada came home with sixth, so. Yikes.

During the 2015-2016 season, they got compared to each other a lot in Franco-Canadian media because they were the two best prospects from the Q. It was a weak year for Q draftees, but those two were up there. Julien was actually ranked above Luc at first. So there were a lot of these:

And they did interviews together:

(Did I mention that Julien had flow until right before the Combine? Raven made this gifset specifically to make me scream, which I did, very loudly.)

The good stuff really happens in 2016-2017, after they were drafted. In November, we had the GIFT of the super series (ok so it’s called the Canada-Russia series now, but whatever). Luc was made captain of Team QMJHL. He wore the C, which was a gift I did not deserve. Julien wore the A, bc of course.

They had so much chemistry on a line together. I shed a tear when I think about it. They helped each other score at least three goals that I can think of, in two games. Also, their cellies were cute, bc Julien gives good hugs (x)

They won both games and Canada won the super series. And THEN less than a month later, we have the WJCs, which is where the bulk of my feels came from. DID YOU KNOW THEY WERE STALLMATES. This seems an inconsequential detail, but I was very excited when I saw it in a random video. (Listen, when there is this little content of your rarepair…)

OH and let’s not forget the celly that started it all. Semifinal game against Team Sweden, Julien scores the go-ahead goal (and eventual game-winner), and is shoved by someone and falls on his back. Luc, in his screaming ecstasy, tries to catch him, fails completely, and decides to drop on top of him for my favorite celly of the year:

I get attacked every time I remember this celly happened. I imagine it’s even better in video form, but sadly they DIDN’T SHOW IT MUCH. Still, check out that bit until 1:36:23 though bc that’s when Luc tries to catch Julien when he’s falling and utterly fails, and decides to just. join him on the ice. It’s cute.

(Have you noticed that every time they celly together, it looks like they make out a little? I’m like 3-for-3 on this.)

And then they lost in the shootout in the gold-medal game to Team USA :( Neither of them was used in the shootout. And then they were both traded to their new, Cup-contending teams that made it to the finals, and Luc was a feisty little shit during that series and so was Julien, and it was a lot for my heart. I maintain that if Julien weren’t suspended, they would’ve fought at some point.

They got compared to each other again, during the series. Several times.

And yeah, that’s like, basically it? I love them both a lot, they’re good boys, so I figured I might like them together too, and I did. My rarepairs all subsist on daydreams and way too much knowledge about their individual QMJHL careers ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(Matchy matchy)

[flauntpage]

People Seem to Have Strong Opinions on Wawa Partnering With the Ravens

I woke up this morning to 157 Facebook comments on Tuesday’s post, titled “Wawa is Now the “Official Hoagie” of the Baltimore Ravens.”

The original story was, of course, written with a tinge of satire. I don’t really believe that Wawa is forsaking the Delaware Valley, since stores already exist in Florida and other places located well beyond our reach. In truth, it’s been quite a while since we’ve been able to claim exclusivity regarding the locally-conceived convenience store.

That being said, we got a wide range of responses to the story, some folks claiming betrayal and others believing that this was a “non story” while being all dramatic about it. I’d like to respond specifically to the following comments:

1. Jason: “Wawa and the Eagles still have a partnership. Might not be “official hoagie”. But y’all don’t get bent out of shape that Dunkin’ is the official coffee of the Eagles when it’s a chain from New England…”

It’s a good point.

If we claim to dislike Boston as much as we do, we’d turn our backs on Dunkin, which is headquartered in Canton, Massachusetts, just south of Beantown.

And no, I don’t think Wawa is the official hoagie of the Eagles, but as recently as last year they were running partnered a sweepstakes with the team:

SWOOP, there it is!

RT for a chance to win tickets to the Eagles game on 10/7. Rules: https://t.co/O0rWpz48fV #FlyEaglesFly #sweeps pic.twitter.com/bqjx8YQhSf

— Wawa (@Wawa) September 23, 2018

2. Chris: “To be fair, all they have down there is Royal Farms…and their food sucks. Consider this the convenience store version of the Peace Corps”

Does Royal Farms suck? I can’t say I’ve ever eaten there. The only one I’ve ever been to is the one on 95 near the airport, and that was when I’d stop to get gas on the way home from Talen Energy Stadium.

But Chris does have a good point; what if we are indeed doing Baltimore a service by allowing the Ravens to partner with Wawa? We should introduce them to a good convenience store, because we are an altuistic people.

3. David: “You missed the real story, it’s about WaWa vs, Royal Farms and now WaWa has a foothold in there (sic) hometown so…”

Royal Farms is headquartered in Baltimore, which I was not aware of.

So yeah, if you look at it that way, it’s a savvy foray into a competitor’s home territory. I guess Wawa partnering with the Ravens could possibly be compared to Sheetz invading Philadelphia to work a deal with the Eagles, and then we’re all eating MTO Subz instead of shorti hoagies.

4. Pete: “They were a sponsor on the ice for the devils last or the year before. I just don’t remember”

This is true.

I just looked it up, and found this blurb from November of 2016:

Wawa Inc., the New Jersey Devils and the Prudential Center have signed a multi-year agreement naming the convenience retailer a proud partner and the Official Breakfast Sandwich of the three-time Stanley Cup Champion hockey club and arena in Newark.

Through the partnership, Wawa and the Devils will team up on promotions throughout the year for fans attending events at the Prudential Center in Newark, where the National Hockey League team plays.

So this isn’t the first time they’ve partnered with a non-local team.

5. Maureen: “So many great local delis that would better represent a Philly hoagie than Wawa, BUT Wawa hoagies aren’t horrible at all…after all, the customer tells the person what they want on their hoagie…so if you think they’re bad, it’s on you 

…but the rest of the country has no idea what a real hoagie is…so, go Wawa! Spread your goodness! The Philly area will always be home!”

Another good point. You are the person customizing the sandwich. Therefore, you decide what goes in it. And if you don’t like the rolls or whatever, then don’t buy their sandwiches.

It’s also true that the Philly area “will always be home,” so maybe we can share our Wawa with other regions of the country.

6. Zane: “It’s so funny that all the people who bash Wawa. Clearly if you didn’t care you wouldn’t make a comment. Wawa is a great company and has actually improved quality over the years. If it’s that bad, when’s the last time you were in one, because I do have to say, they are pretty convenient.”

I never really understood this. I don’t understand why people comment on a story and say “nobody cares.” Zane is right; if you don’t care, then don’t comment. Just skip the story and move on to the next one.

But the thing with Wawa and convenience is this –

It’s about familiarity. You know what you’re getting, and whether you stop at Wawa in Sea Isle City or Pottstown, you know you’re going to find a consistent product, vs. stumbling upon a deli that might be good or may not be good.

I think this is also why white suburbanites are attracted to chain restaurants, because you know what you’re getting. No, Red Lobster ain’t a five-star Philly restaurant, but I know what I’m getting when I stop in. I’m getting those Cheddar Bay biscuits.

7. Geoff: “Just keep the hoagie cutting 

   away from Ray Lewis…”

No comment.

Is pre sliced deli meat part of the Ravens deal with Wawa or is Ray Lewis handling that?

— Franzke & LA (@FranzkeLA) July 23, 2019

8. Tim: “Same people who like wawa hoagies think McDonald’s makes great burgers.”

Let’s not go crazy here (though I think I’ve eaten at McDonald’s once in the last ten years).

9. Kevin: “First Wawa hoagies, what next? Will crack become the official drug of the Ravens, too? Are they going to steal that from us as well?”

To be fair, Philadelphia is not the only city smoking crack. We have no claim to exclusivity in that department.

10. Randy: “Sheetz has better food anyway. They have a fryer. Therefore that battle is already over. Who the hell wants microwaved mozzarella sticks anyway…”

Correct, Sheetz does have fryers. Royal Farms does as well, from what I can gather. That’s why these places can sell popcorn chicken and fried mac and cheese balls and stuff like that.

This does, however, manifest itself in a unique smell coming from the food preparation area, and when I’d walk out of Sheetz in West Virginia I felt like the smell kind of stayed with me for a while. That’s something to think about.

Last word goes to Lloyd:

What in the actual fuck @Wawa you only support 1 bird @Eagles

— Delco4for4 (@Lloyd_Gilbert3) July 23, 2019

  The post People Seem to Have Strong Opinions on Wawa Partnering With the Ravens appeared first on Crossing Broad.

People Seem to Have Strong Opinions on Wawa Partnering With the Ravens published first on https://footballhighlightseurope.tumblr.com/

[kittenplough1-blog]

Philadelphia Is the City of the Year!

Suddenly, Philadelphia has become a model city, with a Super Bowl-winning (and Trump-defying) NFL team and a new radical political class. Oh, and Meek Mill is finally free. We asked some of our favorite locals why they're celebrating 2018.

To be from Philadelphia is to be accustomed to losing. We have a history of losing. You learn about it in school. Every year we'd make the trek out to Valley Forge, 24 miles northwest of the city, where George Washington's army sheltered in place after losing first downtown and then the neighborhood I grew up in, Germantown, in a series of terrible defeats. Winter hit in Valley Forge, and Washington lost thousands more men. We'd go into their freezing huts, which still stand, and imagine loss.

Later we were the nation's capital, until we weren't. Our baseball team, the Phillies, has the distinction of having lost more games than any other professional sports franchise in the country. This magazine called us the “meanest fans in America.” One of our stadiums had jails and judges in it. Until recently, our one victorious athlete was Rocky Balboa, who is a fictional character. But then a weird thing happened: We started winning. I don't just mean the Super Bowl, which, you may recall, the Eagles won on February 4, 2018, in a thrilling 41–33 victory over the New England Patriots, who came out onto the field to the song “Crazy Train” for some reason. We came out to Meek Mill's “Dreams and Nightmares.” Even my parents were saying: “Free Meek Mill.” Then, in April, Meek Mill was freed. The first thing he did was take a helicopter to a Philadelphia 76ers game to see Ben Simmons and Joel Embiid play, because Simmons and Embiid are fucking amazing.

Eagles players became activists, speaking out about the flawed criminal-justice system. Donald Trump disinvited the team from visiting the White House out of spite; our mayor, Jim Kenney, then called our president “a fragile egomaniac obsessed with crowd size.” Our recently elected district attorney, Larry Krasner, is the most progressive D.A. in the entire country. Our restaurants now regularly grace *Bon Appétit'*s Best New Restaurants list. Will Smith joined Instagram and immediately became incredible at it. You don't have to sell your plasma or your soul to afford an apartment in the city. It just feels…different in Philadelphia these days. Downright victorious, even.

Safety for the Philadelphia Eagles

GQ: What was your first impression of Philadelphia when you got there? Malcom Jenkins: I was coming from New Orleans, so I was surprised that the food was as good as it was, that Philly had so many good restaurants. Because I was worried about that.

Philadelphia's fans have a reputation for being difficult. Our fans are no worse than my dad. My dad is one of those guys who, after a game, says, “What happened on that tackle? How'd you miss that?”

What was it like during your run to the Super Bowl last year? It was crazy—especially the more wins we had. It was a fun energy. But also, nobody wanted to get overly excited. Philly's had some disappointing things happen to their teams. So they were a little nervous, right to the end. Like, “Is this going to be another one of those years, where we get hit by a jinx?” [Quarterback] Carson Wentz gets hurt at the end of the year: “Aw, here it is—it's a curse!” But luckily as players we didn't really buy into that.

How did you feel about being disinvited to the White House by President Trump? It didn't bother me. I wasn't going to go, anyway. I think it was a little disappointing for the guys who wanted to go. Their entire lives they've dreamed of winning the Super Bowl and going to the White House, partaking in that tradition. But that was a decision that came from the team. They were only going to send like a couple delegates, and I guess the White House didn't want that. But it didn't stop our celebration. We kept it moving and enjoyed our off-season.

Larry Krasner

District attorney

Larry Krasner was a teenage grease monkey. “One of the things I figured out back in 1978 was that when you tune a car, it gets better gas mileage, it gets quieter, it accelerates more quickly. There are just some kinds of systems, if you can get them to run better, they run better in many different ways.” Now, as Philadelphia's district attorney, Krasner is taking his wrench to the criminal-justice system.

In just a year on the job, he's instituted a sweeping set of reforms—reducing sentences, getting rid of cash bail for a host of nonviolent crimes, and not even prosecuting some offenses, like marijuana possession, at all. The result? Philadelphia's jail population has decreased by more than 20 percent—and crime is down, too. In the process, Philly has become a model of what a progressive, humane, and effective big-city law-enforcement operation looks like.

Krasner is an avowed liberal who spent 30 years as a criminal defense attorney and who isn't afraid to express his disdain for law-and-order types—“a notorious racist, a guy who, frankly, in my view, gets misty when he thinks about lynching,” he said of Attorney General Jeff Sessions—and his election last year was a watershed. “Philadelphia is fertile ground right now for criminal-justice reform for a lot of reasons—and one reason is, frankly, the past, of going the wrong direction for so long,” he says. “That had really alienated voters and had alienated the general population of the city, and made them very distrustful of the court system and to some extent of the district attorney's office and of the police department, so I think some of that bad history is exactly why it has a good future.”

Rapper and favorite son

I came up in the ghetto in North Philly. There was a lot of chaos going on. Just growing up in the wild, jungle-style environment, being a kid and just making it through. In 2007, I was falsely accused: A cop said I pointed a gun at him. And now I'm out on bail and still under supervision in 2018 because of that.

When I was in jail, the Eagles adopted my song “Dreams and Nightmares” as their theme song. It was a good feeling, just knowing I had support. I was in my cell watching the Super Bowl, and I saw the Eagles coming out to my song. I've been an Eagles fan most of my life, so just to see that was crazy for me. It wasn't really about the words and the lyrics; it was just about the excitement it brought the players and the energy it brought the players. I saw a YouTube clip of everyone saying, “Free Meek Mill.” There was cops, police officers, saying it. All the fans that rallied on Broad Street after the Eagles won were saying it. So, you know, it was a big thing. And then I got out.

I feel great about the city right now. I think the new D.A. they elected has integrity. It's good that we have somebody in office who's not just looking for convictions. We got a great mayor, we got a great governor of Pennsylvania. We got Ben Simmons, Joel Embiid, the rest of the Sixers—they're connected to the community. Despite all the adversity we've been through, it feels like our time right now.

“I want to be in Philly for the rest of my life.” — Joel Embiid, 76ers phenom

Cristina Martínez

Chef and co-owner, South Philly Barbacoa

GQ: What do you like best about Philadelphia? Cristina Martínez: People are very attentive to our work here. The restaurant is busy at 5 a.m. My restaurant has had an impact on not only the Latino community but all the restaurants in the city.

Were you surprised that barbacoa could become so popular here? Barbacoa is a food to bring families together. It's also an affordable option for the community—I have the nourishment of hundreds of families in my hands. I feel a commitment to make sure everything is perfect when we are prepping for the day.

What do you like to do in the city when you aren't working? I like to visit Amis, the Italian restaurant where I met my husband. It's motivation for me. And I like to visit the studio of an artist called Isaiah Zagar, who has transformed the city with his murals.

How do chefs fight for the rights of undocumented immigrants? We are organizing 12 dinners with 12 different restaurants, bringing together cooks, chefs, and supporters with the lawyers and activists to listen to the needs of fellow restaurant workers that are undocumented like myself. We are working in the darkness.

Do you feel more pressure to keep silent now that Trump is president? We are here. We work hard. Sometimes I feel that when a person speaks the truth, it makes people uncomfortable; sometimes they come after you. But someone has to do it. So here I am. I'm not scared.

This story originally appeared in the December 2018/January 2019 issue with the title "Philly (Is) Special."

MORE STORIES LIKE THIS ONE

Source: https://www.gq.com/story/philadelphia-is-the-city-of-the-year-2018

[recluse-art]

momentum - 5

chapter 5

[ch 1][ch 2][ch 3][ch 4]

Stress permeated the campus air - it was finals week and students were frantically attempting to cram a semester's worth of information in the span of several days and complete presentations and papers and projects. More than a few were running on lethal amounts of caffeine and Adderall.

They were working on practice exams in the group study area of the library when one of the chairs at their table was pulled out and the intruder plopped into the seat as if they belonged there.

"Hey guys!" Naruto greeted and started unpacking his notes and textbooks. "So glad I found you two, I couldn't find a single open desk or table in this place."

"Hi Naruto," Hinata greeted warmly, perking up to the distraction from the monotonous problems.

Sasuke briefly acknowledged the blonde's presence before turning back to his work - they still had another physics practice exam left to complete.

"You'd think the library would be emptier at 2 AM on a Friday."

With an irritable tone, Sasuke stated, "It's finals week, dobe."

"Fuck dude, it sure is," he sighed and picked up a pencil.

The political science major rifled through his notes and textbooks but quickly became bored - there was so much to study and so little time to study with. It was all very daunting so he watched his quiet friends instead.

When Hinata turned to Sasuke to ask about a specific problem she was stuck on, Naruto was surprised to see him helping her without sass or impatience. While he was best friends with the Uchiha and cared for him dearly, he had to admit that Sasuke was not exactly known for being nice or even remotely helpful. In fact, he was kind of a bastard sometimes.

The blonde interjected, "What are you guys studying?"

Tired lavender eyes peeled away from the never ending practice sheet.

"Physics," she explained glumly.

"Well you're in good hands!" He said emphatically, with a wide grin.

She blinked at him in questioning.

"Yeah, this punk" - he pointed to Sasuke - "took AP Physics in high school and got a 5 on the exam! But he's crazy and wanted to retake physics in college," Naruto remarked with a perplexed expression.

Not registering the shadow that set over Sasuke's features, Naruto continued, "He's actually a physics whiz! He was a part of this nerdy science/math competition and he set a record score for the physics section - it made the news and everything."

Some of her fatigue ebbed and she raised a brow at him, amused. Sasuke schooled his expression to remain neutral and he could not meet her gaze. Instead he stared straight ahead at the rambling blonde, willing him to just stop talking please.

"He went to nationals after and took home the trophy, of course," he bragged about his best friend. "That thing is like, this tall!" He emulated the proportions with his hands, definitely exaggerating.

Before Sasuke could stop her, Hinata reached over to her laptop to Google his name. "U-chi-ha Sa-su-ke," she quietly mouthed the syllables as she typed.

He watched in horror as the trusty search engine pulled up results within 0.62 seconds and he was greeted with old photos from high school and headlines proclaiming of a physics prodigy.

'Hello darkness, my old friend…' played in his head as she clicked on the images tab and he was assaulted with even more embarrassing stills. Stones sank to the pit of his stomach, but she looked absolutely delighted to be perusing Sasuke's awful, awful high school pictures, eyes riveted to the screen.

"Your sense of style has improved," she offered, containing her laughter by pressing her lips together.

The arm warmers worn by the teen in the photos haunted him, as did the popped collar and partially unbuttoned shirt - good god who let him attend the competition like that? No, the better question was: who let him leave the house like that?

Naruto hoisted his body across the table to look at her computer and let out a hearty chuckle. "Our boy Sasuke had an edgy emo phase," he then glanced at the sullen man's outfit, a dark hoodie and similarly dark jeans. "Actually, he might still be in it."

Sasuke wanted to be anywhere else but here, in the library with his past exposed to the girl he was absolutely infatuated with.

Noticing his taciturn attitude, Hinata threaded her fingers into his bangs to brush them away from his eyes, "But I think your hair has gotten messier."

The lavender pools conveyed mirth and her lingering touch on his temple made his pulse race, face heating to an uncomfortable temperature. Any existing thoughts went up in smoke with her simple actions; if his brain was a computer, Sasuke.exe would have stopped working.

"Aww, Sasuke's embarrassed," Naruto teased in a belittling voice, snapping him out of his reverie.

As much as he wanted to lean into the warmth of her palm, he did the opposite and returned to his homework. Her hand dropped back to her side and he secretly mourned the loss.

Letting his bangs fall over his eyes and obscure his features, he did what he did best and tuned out his surroundings.

He was in the midst of solving problem 28 when he felt familiar fingers sweep his bangs away from his face once again. Caught off guard, he reflexively turned to the person playing with his hair.

"Ah, wait," Hinata was careful not to tug on his scalp with his sudden movement.

He held still, waiting patiently for her to finish.

Despite his best efforts, a shiver traveled down his spine at her ministrations. He almost sighed in pleasure at how good it felt to have her running her fingers through his tresses.

Thinking she accidentally pulled too hard, she apologized. "Sorry, did that hurt?"

"No." Quite the opposite, actually, but he wouldn't dare say it out loud. He would gladly let her play with his hair as much as her heart desired. Hell, he would let her touch him anytime she wanted - no questions asked.

A light snore drew his attention to a sleeping blonde on the other side of the table. That was quick. Though Naruto never had the focus to study for long periods of time anyways.

As she gathered his hair in a ponytail, she whispered to avoid waking their friend up. "Sorry for making fun of you," he could tell she was smiling, "I actually thought you were cute."

She just finished tying the upper half of it back, since the rest was too short, when he turned around in his seat to look at her. "Were?" he emphasized the past tense with a tilt of his head.

"Don't fret, you still are," she assured him with a grin and a pat on the cheek.

Grabbing her wrist before she could pull away, he pressed his lips to her soft palm. "What a relief," he replied wryly, a smirk gracing his features.

A blush bloomed on her face and her laughter was a little off - he could tell she was flustered.

Good. He wanted to be the one that threw off her composure.

Releasing her hand to let her return to her seat, he replayed the scene in his head and relished in the sensation of her fingers buried in his hair. Idly, he wondered what it would feel like to have her hands elsewhere...

Hinata's nerves were rattled; the ghost of his kiss seemed to be burned into her skin and she had trouble focusing on anything else.

They continued to do their homework, though physics was the last thing on either of their minds.

[aurimeanswind]

Take My Breath Away—Sunday Chats (3/5/17)

It’s been a pretty long two first months of this year. Funny how such a big week for games has been a bit underpinned by some really terrible personal-life-related-things for me. I can’t really discuss them, but we’ll see where life takes me in the near future.

But it’s Switchmas! Let’s stay on the up and up. The first Sunday of March, as I approach my 24th birthday, which is still kind of absolutely crazy to me, and PAX East closes in. It’s a big week, and let’s start with a big editorial.

Take My Breath Away

There is a lot of hyperbole when discussions of Zelda begin and end. I think that is what someone, offput to Zelda or 3D Zelda would say. The series is obviously not infallible, and isn’t something that just everyone loves. I know many who hate specifically 3D Zeldas, and I know some that consider the highest triumphs of that series to be base and disappointing. Some people even consider Skyward Sword in the series, when I think it really does represent everything that went wrong with that franchise, especially at the time. This isn’t a realization that came to me when initially playing it. When I played that game, I loved it. I gave it a 10/10 on IrrationalPassions.com. I said it was an achievement, and I too said I didn’t know how motion controls could leave that franchise. Years later, playing through it again on Alex Plays Zelda, and of course seeing the criticisms lodged against it, I completely rethought my opinion of the game. But I played it again. I experienced it again. I saw what the game did RIGHT and WRONG. I made a complete thought of that game, and looked at it with the context of the franchise it belonged too around it.

People change. Opinions change. Video games have changed. And most importantly, Zelda, Nintendo, and the needs and wants of that franchise have changed.

The Legend of Zelda Breath of the Wild is incredible. It’s masterfully well made, it’s brilliant in its design, and it’s a beautifully realized world. This is not hyperbole. This is how this game feels. Whether it’s because the Zelda name is attached or not, it’s impossible to say. This game wasn’t made in a vacuum, clearly taking inspiration from several other games and franchises that have changed, released, and evolved over the last six years, and this game should not be acknowledged and criticized in a vacuum. It belongs to a storied franchise that, whether you want to acknowledge it or not, has changed gaming in a variety of ways, causing massive shifts in how we look at adventure, exploratory, and now open world games.

The game brings a childlike wonder to me that I haven’t actually felt since I was a child. It was something that A Link Between Worlds echoed as well. That game was brilliant, and clearly was a design-test for what Breath of the Wild sets out and wants to do. BotW is massive in a way that few games have felt to me, because every opportunity feels essential to me, and it’s not because some collectible is there, or some arbitrary destination, but because I actively want to explore and engage with the opportunity to do so. That is something no game has made me feel. The closest would be with titles within this same franchise.

But I have so many thoughts and feelings I don’t know how I can or will get them out on the page. We’ll see if I can figure out a way soon, but I just really need to play more of that game. Mostly because Nato Johnston keeps DMing about the game and I keep telling him to stop but I know he is going to spoil some shit for me, and the more I see of the game that I haven’t discovered for myself after having started it, the more and more frustrated I’ve been getting that I’m not playing it in that very moment.

What’s on Tap

Nioh

Same frustrations I talked about last week, but Tony (Horvath) turned me onto using Magic, which has broken the game for me.

Honestly, it’s broken now. It’s kind of a bummer.

There is a spell you can use to slow any enemy’s movement by 40/50ish% and it works on EVERYTHING. Including bosses.

I dropped Nioh when Horizon came out, and now that I have Zelda, I have no clue when I’ll even get back to it. Hrm...

Horizon Zero Dawn

Now this is a video game!

I honestly have not been as sucked into the world and the story has I had hoped I would be. It’s all impressive, and goddamn does the game look unfuckingbelievably good, but the immediate release of Zelda reminded me that good graphics don’t pull me into a world nearly was well as interesting set dressing.

Don’t get me wrong, the games aren’t very comparable, but where Horizon feels narrow in directed (in a totally good and fun way mind you) Zelda feels open and inviting in all directions simultaneously. It’s overwhelming in a calm way that invites me to just do what I want.

Still, I know I haven’t hit many if any of the narrative hooks of Horizon yet, so I have plenty to see.

I do really, really love the combat. I feel like hunting robots is some of the most rewarding combat in any open world game I’ve played. I feel like I have to use everything I have available to me, and perfecting the art of taking down a machine or kind of machine is super rewarding. I’m very much digging it.

Zelda Breath of the Wild

See above!

Questions

Tacos, for sure. I don’t really like taquitos. I wouldn’t doubt that there are good ones out there, but like, I haven’t had them.

Unquestionably teriyaki. Like, not even with a second thought. Though I am not a huge fan of Soy Sauce. It’s okay, ya know? Like somethings I will dip my sushi in it, but it’s essentially just liquid salt. Teriyaki is one of the all time greatests. That shit is life changing.

Hahaha, honestly getting to hear your stories was a ton of fun. For folks who haven’t checked it out, Jon Anderson here did some post-GDC shows. I got to sit in on one and talk to him a little bit about his experiences. I loved hearing about the post mortem stuff and interaction with actual, real developers. That’s always one of my favorite parts about being at PAX, is talking to the people who make games. Seeing their faces, hearing their stories.

I uh... I’m not really a political person, and I don’t stay to date with this kind of stuff for reasons I have outlined in previous Sunday Chats. 

I’m not one of those people that thinks everyone needs to have an opinion on everything. I heard about this shit, and it goes without saying that I think Donald Trump is an ignorant imbecile that has absolutely no worth as President of this once-great-nation. He always cares way too much about Twitter, which is saying something.

But I don’t know the situation, it sounds absolutely absurd to me, but I’m not about to get out there and make some sweeping statement because I don’t need/deserve to have an opinion on this. Really sick of everyone out there with a twitter account and keyboard thinking their opinions on stuff, especially politics, and especially when you live in a vacuum.

I know I got a little off the point there, but my answer is: I don’t care to follow the stream of information about this story, and if that makes me ignorant, so be it, but I’ll refrain from making some blanket right-or-wrong statement about the subject because I am aware of my ignorance, and would rather do my research first than say something out of turn. Sounds like some silly shit though.

This is a heavy question, and I think it’s weird to ask maybe one of the whitest dudes out there. I live in a very nice, very progressive state, Maryland, which is *technically* a southern state, and I live in the most interracial-city in that state. I’m lucky enough to be surrounded by low amounts of crime and really open-minded and diverse people. That being said, I’m a fucking white dude, so I know the world I see is filtered and my perspective is skewed because of that.

I always want to show some faith for humanity in something like this. It’s terrible and wrong that even the “southern states” are going to be some racist shithead states where you have to fear for being attacked. That being said, there are plenty of stories out there, news or personal, that fill the lines of my skewed perspective and say that hey: it may not be as safe or comfortable at least for people of color in the US as it was a few months ago.

I don’t have any good advice for you, and I don’t think it’s my place to speak for discriminated groups that I’m not a part of. I sure as shit know that I’m not about to treat any folks different, but I don’t live in the blanket space you’re referring to, and I can’t speak for the problems you may have to face. Again, my reflex advice is to say have some faith in people, but my gut says if you have to ask the question, you know something fucked up is going on.

I’m sorry Jusitn, I wish I had a better, solid answer, but I am not the right person to ask.

I apologize in advance if either the answer to this question or the previous came off as offensive or prejudice. Tell me if it did, so I may better myself and how I approach these issues going forward in life and on Sunday Chats. I am always open to feedback.

I never had your family Andrew! Goddammit! Stop trying to make me look like an awful person!

But I honest to god love it. I talked about it on the show (Irrational Passions Podcast EP. 318) last night but man do I like it more than I thought I would. I really do love the Joycons and the Joycon grip, things I didn’t think I’d say come hardware release.

It’s also just a nice system to carry and play. I’ve been taking it upstairs to my kitchen to hangout and play while my coffee brews. A bad edge-case example simply because I never leave my house, so haven’t had as many opportunities to play it in portable mode. But it’s a portable I actually want to use, like my Vita when it still worked 100%, which is more than I thought I’d be saying for sure. Very happy to have this excellent feeling hardware.

Hahaha, I can’t wait to meet up with you Logan! We’re gonna take the world by storm! Gonna rule the PAX East roost with some dope previews.

Yeah, the restaurant we are going for our annual pre-PAX East Meeting Dinner is going to be so good. Plus we are bringing friends this time around, and the whole team... it’ll be glorious. 

Oh and that Mac and Cheese? I’ll just let the picture speak for itself:

I honestly worried that they’ll both be forgotten. I think Zelda breaking into the legendary top 5 of meteoritic ratings, which ya know, take it with a grain of salt and whatever, will give it some staying power. But Skyward Sword got a lot of 10s too, and that is NOT a 10/10 game, for sure. 

But the thing I’m worried about is Mario Odyssey. It’s really not a big worry, since if that game overshadows Zelda, it’s obviously gotta be pretty good, but I just like Zelda a whole lot more than Mario. I know this is sacrilegious to say to you Logan, but that’s just my preference. I don’t want Zelda to be forgotten for years and years to come.

But there are still a ton of unknowns! Fucking Persona 5! Destiny 2! Red Dead Redemption 2! I mean, Red Dead alone being a Rockstar “Open World” game has to potential to kill the hopes of Zelda and Horizon combined. If we want to talk about kinds of games that are way overrated, pretty much every Rockstar open world game has paled in comparison to either of these games to me, but hey, I haven’t played Red Dead Redemption, so who knows.

I honestly do a lot. I mean, not as much recently. I haven’t played anything multiplayer in a while outside of nights playing The Division with friends.

But I’ll be straight up with you Ivan, I am very selective about who I play multiplayer games with. I really only lean to cooperative stuff outside of maybe Overwatch and Destiny (Destiny far less so on the competitive front) and I tend to play with the same group of folks only. I know you keep asking to play multiplayer games with me, but I predominantly play single player, especially recently and for the foreseeable future, and I don’t play multiplayer with many folks at all.

And yeah! It was fun to be able to chat a bit.

Haha, yours too buddy. I will be in San Francisco between May 31st and some other days, so yeah, maybe we’ll see each other.

Tons of indie stuff! Hanging out with Team Irrational Passions. Catching up with some friends, like you, and Kaylie, and Xyger, and Trevor. Good peoples that I haven’t seen since December.

I never wanted to get VIP tickets because they are way too fucking expensive for KFL, just like they always have been. Though I was approached about an extra VIP ticket that I wouldn’t have to pay for and would be able to go to the meet and greet on Sunday, and I may or may not go. We’ll see. But personally I wouldn’t want to spend that much money for a VIP ticket to just about anything. VIP tickets to a Ninja Sex Party show I went to last year were only $69.69 (lolololol) and that had a signed poster and private Q&A with it. That was still cheaper than the regular KFL3 tickets. But hey, I get it, this stuff is expensive.

I also feel weird getting a VIP ticket, ya know? I’m friends with Greg and know the rest of the Kinda Funny guys, having seen them a ton of times in the past. I’m not trying to be bragging or anything here, I swear, I just don’t want to take the opportunity away from folks that I know are flying half-way across the world to meet the guys (and Joey!) for the first time ever. That’s an amazing experience that those folks deserve, not me.

Like, no Zelda questions, huh? Logan was alright. I talked about it on the show last night, but my movie theatre legitimately ruined that entire movie for me. I am still so fucking pissed about it. The guy next to me snoring through the whole movie. Waking up at the end and talking through literally all the emotional/poingant scenes at the end. The people behind me LOUD AS FUCK saying “AWWWWW” anytime anything ‘sad’ happened to the characters, and speaking SO LOUD through just about everything. Or maybe everyone constantly overreacting to the gore in the movie. Like, the goriest scene was easily the first, and it set the precedent for what the film was gonna do, and yet for some reason, everyone had to YELL and laugh and be complete assholes through every action scene.

Uhg. It was easily the worst movie theatre experience I have ever had. So no, I didn’t have any enjoyment with Logan. Also the movie was kind of just too much of a bummer for me, in accompaniment with the theatre. Like, there was absolutely nothing fun or uplifting about that movie, and that’s just not what I wanted/needed at the time. So eh.

I’m always down to play some Super Smash Bros! 

Shoutouts

Shoutout to guys over at Podcast Unlocked on IGN for an excellent interview with Phil Spencer. I have a super man-crush on Phil Spencer, I’m not gonna lie, but just because he is far and away the most engaging and down-to-earth executive in the biz. He is a cool dude and speaks for Xbox Games in a way that Mattrick never did. Check out the episode if you haven’t already:

I have wanted nothing more than to go and play Zelda this whole time, and don’t get me wrong, my love for Sundays or Sunday Chats hasn’t gone away, but my frustrating lack of sleep and blockades between me and adventuring across Hyrule have only grown. 

Back to it!

[ftmthor]

NBA news: Brooklyn Nets’ Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving trade deal has made NBA fans go crazy

The Brooklyn Nets turned out to be the free agency winners after signing both Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving. In a surprise to every NBA fan, Durant decided to go with the Nets instead of the New York Knicks. While the Knicks fans are upset over the trade deals, the Brooklyn people are having a field day with it.

[This post contains video, click to play]

Most of the fans are excited over the news and can’t wait to Durant and Irving play together. The pairing has increased the chances for the Nets to be a top contender for NBA 2020 finals. Here are the reasons how the Nets can win big in the next NBA season and Twitter reactions on the Kevin-Kyrie deal.

Brooklyn Nets to be NBA 2020 Champion

Kevin Durant should recover before the NBA 2020 playoffs and will join an already bonded Kyrie Irving. It is not just Durant, DeAndre Jordan from the Warriors have been also traded to the team of Brooklyn Nets. The trio together can be very powerful and have the capacity to win the NBA 2020 finals trophy.

On the other hand, the Lakers can’t even find a third-star player to support their duo of LeBron James and Anthony Davis. Meanwhile, Kawhi Leonard is taking time to pick a deal, and all other free agents are making trade deals. If all the good free agents are gone, the Lakers won’t be able to beat the Nets in next NBA season.

Best Tweets on Kevin Kyrie Duo

The Brooklyn Nets fans are very happy about the trade deal and can’t contain their excitement. The individual fans of Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving are also glad that the two stars will play together in the next NBA season. It is not just about a professional team up, both Durant and Irving are also good friends in real life, which makes it much emotional. Here are the best tweets on Twitter about Kevin and Kyrie teaming up for the Brooklyn Nets team.

Brooklyn is making a clean sweep tonight: Brooklyn will sign Kevin Durant, Kyrie Irving and DeAndre Jordan, league sources tell ESPN.

— Adrian Wojnarowski (@wojespn) June 30, 2019

😍😍😍@KDTrey5 @KyrieIrving #Nets pic.twitter.com/9iqWQlUsRZ

— #LGM (@HenrySanchez) July 5, 2019

Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving to the Nets.

Everybody: pic.twitter.com/Kc5jHA42Dp

— Sports It’s What We Do (@SportsWhatWeDo) June 30, 2019

Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving celebrating their signing with the Nets

pic.twitter.com/cAEjS2AOw7

— KFC Radio (@KFCradio) June 30, 2019

That Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving relationship is something special 😮#nets pic.twitter.com/MYkOl2RMet

— Nets Nation (@NetsNationCP) July 5, 2019

What the Nets did with $68m:

Kyrie Irving Kevin Durant DeAndre Jordan

What the Knicks did with $69m:

Julius Randle Bobby Portis Taj Gibson Reggie Bullock

— Gotty (@OhGotty) July 1, 2019

Kevin Durant, Kyrie Irving, and DeAndre Jordan … WHAT #NBAFreeAgency 🤯 pic.twitter.com/SCQq6NixEu

— SportsNation (@SportsNation) June 30, 2019

BREAKING: After missing out on Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving (and Zion and the rest of everyone in the NBA) earlier this evening, James Dolan and the Knicks have offered Scranton PG Michael Scott a 5 yr/$183M deal, league sources tell ESPN. A stunner to say the least. pic.twitter.com/SXcWgLslqM

— Kevin (@kevinmick) July 1, 2019

One more day and the Nets can OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCE KEVIN DURANT AND KYRIE IRVING

— KEVIN FUCKING DURANT (@NelsonGafanha) July 5, 2019

The post NBA news: Brooklyn Nets’ Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving trade deal has made NBA fans go crazy appeared first on Hiptoro.

source https://www.hiptoro.com/p/nba-brooklyn-nets-kevin-durant-kyrie-irving-trade-deal-free-agency-2019/ source https://emmaleebruce.tumblr.com/post/186075873375

[hildaagular]

NBA news: Brooklyn Nets’ Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving trade deal has made NBA fans go crazy

The Brooklyn Nets turned out to be the free agency winners after signing both Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving. In a surprise to every NBA fan, Durant decided to go with the Nets instead of the New York Knicks. While the Knicks fans are upset over the trade deals, the Brooklyn people are having a field day with it.

Most of the fans are excited over the news and can’t wait to Durant and Irving play together. The pairing has increased the chances for the Nets to be a top contender for NBA 2020 finals. Here are the reasons how the Nets can win big in the next NBA season and Twitter reactions on the Kevin-Kyrie deal.

Brooklyn Nets to be NBA 2020 Champion

Kevin Durant should recover before the NBA 2020 playoffs and will join an already bonded Kyrie Irving. It is not just Durant, DeAndre Jordan from the Warriors have been also traded to the team of Brooklyn Nets. The trio together can be very powerful and have the capacity to win the NBA 2020 finals trophy.

On the other hand, the Lakers can’t even find a third-star player to support their duo of LeBron James and Anthony Davis. Meanwhile, Kawhi Leonard is taking time to pick a deal, and all other free agents are making trade deals. If all the good free agents are gone, the Lakers won’t be able to beat the Nets in next NBA season.

Best Tweets on Kevin Kyrie Duo

The Brooklyn Nets fans are very happy about the trade deal and can’t contain their excitement. The individual fans of Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving are also glad that the two stars will play together in the next NBA season. It is not just about a professional team up, both Durant and Irving are also good friends in real life, which makes it much emotional. Here are the best tweets on Twitter about Kevin and Kyrie teaming up for the Brooklyn Nets team.

Brooklyn is making a clean sweep tonight: Brooklyn will sign Kevin Durant, Kyrie Irving and DeAndre Jordan, league sources tell ESPN.

— Adrian Wojnarowski (@wojespn) June 30, 2019

😍😍😍@KDTrey5 @KyrieIrving #Nets pic.twitter.com/9iqWQlUsRZ

— #LGM (@HenrySanchez) July 5, 2019

Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving to the Nets.

Everybody: pic.twitter.com/Kc5jHA42Dp

— Sports It’s What We Do (@SportsWhatWeDo) June 30, 2019

Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving celebrating their signing with the Nets

pic.twitter.com/cAEjS2AOw7

— KFC Radio (@KFCradio) June 30, 2019

That Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving relationship is something special 😮#nets pic.twitter.com/MYkOl2RMet

— Nets Nation (@NetsNationCP) July 5, 2019

What the Nets did with $68m:

Kyrie Irving Kevin Durant DeAndre Jordan

What the Knicks did with $69m:

Julius Randle Bobby Portis Taj Gibson Reggie Bullock

— Gotty (@OhGotty) July 1, 2019

Kevin Durant, Kyrie Irving, and DeAndre Jordan … WHAT #NBAFreeAgency 🤯 pic.twitter.com/SCQq6NixEu

— SportsNation (@SportsNation) June 30, 2019

BREAKING: After missing out on Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving (and Zion and the rest of everyone in the NBA) earlier this evening, James Dolan and the Knicks have offered Scranton PG Michael Scott a 5 yr/$183M deal, league sources tell ESPN. A stunner to say the least. pic.twitter.com/SXcWgLslqM

— Kevin (@kevinmick) July 1, 2019

One more day and the Nets can OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCE KEVIN DURANT AND KYRIE IRVING

— KEVIN FUCKING DURANT (@NelsonGafanha) July 5, 2019

The post NBA news: Brooklyn Nets’ Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving trade deal has made NBA fans go crazy appeared first on Hiptoro.

NBA news: Brooklyn Nets’ Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving trade deal has made NBA fans go crazy published first on http://www.hiptoro.com/ NBA news: Brooklyn Nets’ Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving trade deal has made NBA fans go crazy posted first on http://www.hiptoro.com/