#Zx Beau

[piratespencil]

So I’m curious. How do you imagine Beau got that scar over her left eye?

Know what my headcanon is? She got it from Lorenzo. Most likely when he attacked her while invisible. And she refused to have it healed away, to remind herself of her failure, to motivate herself to do better and keep her friends safe.

I’ve stuck with that headcanon ever since, because it sounds the most plausible. Even had someone do art of that moment from “The Stalking Nightmare”. 😁

And I wonder how Yasha felt when she saw that scar in detail when they all met again in Nicodranas five episodes later…

Oh wow! You know what? For some reason I always thought that Beau had that scar in her original character art and that it was from something that happened to her pre-campaign, but I just checked and she totally doesn’t have it at the beginning.

I like your headcanon! That is something interesting about scars in a world with magic healing… Is every scar something that people with access to clerics CHOSE not to have removed? Are there certain injuries that scar no matter what? Hmm.

(And I wonder if Beau would tell Yasha where the scar was from if it was from Lorenzo, or if she wouldn’t want to upset Yasha any more than she’s already upset about what Lorenzo did to Molly…)

[warriorbard2012]

Part 2 of The Second Time Around is now posted on AO3.

Chapter 2: History, Revelations and Painful Questions

Beau and Clara have a hard discussion and some interesting information about Clara’s past is revealed.

See chapter notes for Content Warnings!

Requested by @tiamat-zx and based upon the prompt “We’re going to be a family!”

[zx-ta]

OASIS SPRINGS - Bedrock Strait - Pebble Burrow (30x20) I made this lot and you can download the Broke family and their home right here.

The Broke residence: Dustin, Skip, Beau and Brandi. This family is from The Sims 2. As my game is set before TS2, Skip is alive. Rejoice!

[astridbecks]

Beau and Astrid being frenemies is such a novel concept, one that I can imagine transitioning to them being friendly rivals if not extended family, especially if Astrid keeps failing to poison her and then relents and asks Beau to help her REFINE her craft. They just love getting under each other’s skin, which ends up being a benefit for Astrid after years of trauma as she can begin to feel like an actual person again, albeit one with power.

Also, I could see Astrid being someone who actually likes Yasha’s bizarre cooking, thus it wins her points. Can you imagine the three of them on a trip together? The bad guys wouldn’t stand a chance!

beau and astrid's post-canon relationship is SO important to me!! i have so many thoughts about them!! (and actually i also have to rec @operafloozy's very excellent fic Especially The Lies for 1) being a great take on their dynamic and 2) using the phrase "professional frenemies" for them which i immediately adopted). i just love the idea of the two of them working together and maybe... even... becoming friends?? they'd make such a formidable team.

the point about astrid enjoying yasha's cooking is galaxy brained, as is the idea of the three of them kicking ass together. i'm definitely gonna have to find a way to play with that concept.

[littledoggy-girlcollar]

DON’T! LIKE! THE! IMPLICATIONS! HERE!

[louloutche]

For @tiamat-zx’s birthday, as a gift, I started writing chapter 8 of my Mercenary!Beau AU tonight. So here’s what will probably be the opening scene of the chapter.

I hope you enjoy it buddy, and once again, happy birthday to you!

---

Beau hates a lot of things.

She hates people being loud when they eat. She hates skipping her morning workout. She hates being interrupted while she’s explaining something. She hates clients trying to bargain and pay her less than what she’s asking for. She hates people seeing through her façade. She hates people assuming that because they do they have a way to make her bend the knee. She hates looking weak in any way. She hates feeling weak.

She hates many other things.

One new thing she’s learning to hate right now is having the woman she’s been catching feelings for trying to cut her in half.

Fucking sex-demons, or whatever they are.

First using Caleb to try to burn them all alive, and now Yasha to turn them into raw meat.

Fuck these demons and their charms.

Yasha has been chasing after Beau like a mad woman, relentlessly trying to pierce and slash her, sometimes missing, sometimes hitting. Seeing her rage during previous battles was low key impressive. Now it’s high key terrifying. On the few occasions Beau manages to slice her in return with her dagger, Yasha seems to take it pretty easily, almost shrugging it off like it’s nothing. This Rage-thing is really convenient, but only when the one using it is fighting on your side.

And the worst part? Beau’s strikes don’t seem to be enough to help Yasha to snap out of the charm she’s under.

Beau already lost a fight just a few hours ago. There’s no way she’s losing this one too.

She grits her teeth and after a brief hesitation, she sheathes her dagger. She angrily clenches her fists and lifts them in front of her. “Come at me, baby,” she grunts in a low voice.

Yasha’s face remains stern while she tightens her grip on the hilt of her sword and rushes over to Beau once more. But this time, Beau is ready.

She swiftly moves aside and when Yasha’s sword comes down and hits the rocky ground with a metallic clunking sound, she puts her boot on the blade. Strong as Yasha is, she will probably be able to take it back easily, but it might buy Beau a bit of time, and a few seconds are all she needs.

She weighs down on the sword, both to keep it in place and to gather momentum. Her whole body tenses, her other foot leaves the ground, and she jumps in the air, using Yasha’s weapon as a launching pad. She pulls her right arm backward and when she comes down on top of Yasha, she clocks her right across the face as hard as possible with a feral scream.

“Fucking snap out of it!”

It still looks like Yasha suffers less damage than Beau’s usual opponents do, but fuck it. Beau would never admit it, but it kind of feels good to punch her in the face.

Yasha looks at her and her expression is still completely blank. And Beau. Fucking. Hates. It.

She prefers the sadness usually clinging to her face. At least Yasha looks like she’s feeling something when she’s herself instead of some fuck-demon’s puppet. Right now she just looks hollow. Like she doesn’t know Beau. Like she’s nothing to her. And Beau truly hates it.

Out of sheer frustration, Beau bitterly backhands her before she can raise her sword and attack.

The slap hits Yasha’s cheek with a sharp sound. It probably doesn’t do a lot of damage, but this time her head is brutally forced to the side. Beau is already clenching her fist for another punch, but right as she goes for it, Yasha turns her head to look at her and her face has completely changed. It takes Beau by surprise, not enough to stop her in her momentum, but it makes her hesitate for a split second. That’s enough for Yasha to catch her fist just before it hits her cheekbone.

She looks her in the eyes with the most apologetic expression Beau has ever seen on anyone.

“I’m sorry.”

Beau realizes that even knowing that Yasha is back to herself, she still wants to punch her. She doesn’t know where this feeling comes from or how to interpret it, and it makes her grit her teeth. But instead of a punch she settles for a snarly retort.

“For what?”

Yasha blinks at her and then opens her mouth, but Beau breaks free from her grip and turns away before she can say anything.

She doesn’t have time for this.

She has a fight to win.

[atimeofbeing]

Not sure if Beau's really putting Artie on the same level as Trent & Thoreau though when she said she had enough of "manipulative assholes". Because Artie DID actually admit his faults, that he never meant to hurt Jester intentionally & the Nein DID say he could work his way back into their good graces. I think she can learn to be tolerant of him, especially if he EARNS trust. But Trent & Thoreau? AND Obann? She's DONE with them. It's her way of putting behind her the damage Thoreau did to her.

Yeah I think certainly that Artagan is not placed on the same level as trent/thoreau/obann, and i think Artagan willingly kicking Jester off is a gesture  of good will that Beau has taken and is at the point where its like.. ok i’ll regard you like my best friends lowkey sus boyfriend, we aren’t outright enemies but i sure as hell don’t like you. I wanted to explore Beau’s reaction to him though, because i feel like its sometimes dismissed as her not trusting Jester, whereas I tend to lean on the side of everything being informed by experience.

I do think that Beau was grouping Artagan as a manipulative asshole and i think that Beau very vocally doing that and openly disliking him is her way of indicating that Jester has someone who is fully in her corner. That may seem a bit odd but i think that for Beau it is vital to let Jester know that she won’t be annoyed or disappointed if she lets that relationship go. And again going back to her family and growing up - we know VERY directly that Clara was very passive and never stood up to thoreau, even in defense of her daughter, so Beau i think needs call artagan’s faults out to show jester ‘im here for you and only you, i will defend you (like i was never defended)’

[blurrycriticalroleposts]

I really loved all the responses to my Keyleth appreciation post, so I'm going to continue with some more character appreciation!

The incredible @tiamat-zx requested some Beau love, so let's give it to them!

Tell me what you loved about the Queen of Dope Monk Shit!

For a self-described abrasive asshole, I loved Beau's relationships with the Mighty Nein and with NPCs, and how those relationships evolved with her. She learned how to not be afraid to love, and how to let others love her in return.

Whereas Keyleth had to learn to be assertive and take control, to almost harden herself to a certain degree, I think Beau's overall arc was about her letting her hard spiky shell of a personality soften.

[jtr-99]

Travelercon is over, and the Nein are on a ship back home. Beau is surprised when Yasha comes knocking at her door, asking for her assistance.

A little birthday present for @tiamat-zx . Happy birthday, friend!

[a-dead-spirit-flying]

It always does circle back to eyes with Beau. Say…how did she get that scar?

It’s finally complete! Thanks for the commission @tiamat-zx ! I had so much fun with this!

(c2 x e29)

[your-turn-to-role]

How many times has Fjord been stabbed/impaled through the chest now?? Does that poor man have any skin left?? Is it all scar tissue?

i mean, lets be real, this is just a mighty nein trait by now

i don’t remember every moment off the top of my head, nor do i know how i could accurately search for every single moment without painstakingly combing through every episode, but here’s what i can put together fairly quickly (just counting big weapons like harpoons spears and swords, if we count arrows and crossbow bolts everyone’s count like, doubles):

fjord: -harpoon by the merrow in 21, would have knocked him out but he used relentless endurance -his own threat to uk’otoa in 72 (added by @velocirabbit) -stabbed in the back by the inevitable end in 86 (added by @tiamat-zx) -impaled by the gorgon in 96 (added by @tiamat-zx) -the sword that killed him in 98 -harpooned by the centurion in 120

caleb: -pinned to the wall by the robot’s spear in 25 -harpooned by the merrow in 44 (added by @drdone) -stabbed through the chest by yasha in 55 -speared by the lightning lance also in 55 bc this was really a rough episode for caleb (he went down four times but two were claw attacks)

beau: -stabbed through the chest by yasha in 86 -harpooned by the centurion in 120 (added by @tiamat-zx)

molly: -the obvious

cad: -halas clone in 82 (actually stabbed through his chest with its hand and, ow) -stabbed in the back by the inevitable end in 84 (added by @rose-red-ink)

jester: -stabbed when already unconscious by a kryn warrior when crossing into xhorhas (51) can’t actually find any for veth or yasha, congrats guys on not yet being impaled 😂

but yeaaahhhhh the m9′s been through a lot

[swampythesweetsketch]

Do the ninjas know that the bizzaros are still running around??

In the AU, the Ninja has no freaking clue at first.

Since they're so busy with traveling all over Ninjago to save it from the stupid megalomaniac of the month, they miss the implications that they're in two places at once. With the passing newspaper talking of them stopping a robbery when they were in Stixx or saving a stranded group when in the middle of fighting a big bad on the other side of the island.

After a time, they do kind of catch on as a report on them getting credit for something they know they didn't do, cause they were at home! And digging around for info only causes more confusion as more efforts were credited to them when they were busy/unavailable.

And at this point in time, the Bizarros are using customized versions of the ZX gis that the Ninja barely recognize; And their faces and hairstyles are so different that the Ninja chalk them up to be copycats or wannabes.

It's when they get to get in close contact during one fight with a gang that is dealing in Vengestone bullet production- and one of the goons shoots Lloyd in the arm.

Onyx and Beau lose their shit while Volt and Aspen fail to reel them in.

The Ninja realize who they might be and the criminal gang is reduced to messes that have to be carted off to the hospital before prison.

From there the Bizarros start laying low.

[lucky-aspen]

Guardian Angel

TW: talk about abuse / panic attack

@tiamat-zx @zearbearz I’m sorry this took so long. I hope you enjoy.

It had been an hour or so since both Jester and Beau had fallen asleep but Yasha had found herself wide awake. Her attention was drawn to the window of the tavern room they were staying in. Yasha once again volunteered to take the floor but now she was sitting on the windowsill, watching the outside world. She hadn’t bothered trying to sleep. Not yet at least, she preferred it this way. To make sure the others found sleep before her. In some sort of way she felt as if she was protecting them, keeping watch as their protective angel, even if she knew nothing would happen.

It was like this most nights. Stay up until everyone had fallen sleep before finding sleep herself. The moonlight lit up the room just slightly so she was able to make out most of the room in color with the help of her dark vision making everything clearer. The room didn’t have much, two beds and a night stand between the two of them where an unlit candle sat. Their belongings scattered across the floor in a way to have a much more comfortable sleep than wearing all their gear.

Yasha had sat her two swords to the side, both resting in the corner of the room, along with her bag she carried. She didn’t have much on her to begin with so her stuff didn’t take up too much space. Her long cloak she had on was used as a blanket of sorts in case she got cold. Luckily that wasn’t the case but it was more of a comfort at this point to wear it. She knew by this point nothing would happen, at least she hoped. She could feel sleep creeping it’s way to her. The way her head kept nodding off as her eyes began to close but only to suddenly snap her head back up, her eyes wide open once more. This went on for a few minutes and whenever she thought she couldn’t last any longer she was scared awake by a sudden movement.

Jumping she looked over to the bed closest to the door. Beau had sat up quickly, her chest going up in down quickly, breathing heavily as if she had been racing for hours. Sweat could be seen along her brow and the back of her neck. Strains of her, usually pulled up hair, rested against the frame of her face. Her eyes red and puffy, a sharp contrast from the blue iris’ she had. Her cheeks were wet with tears. The panic in her face was clear and Yasha was now wide awake. The heavy breathing didn’t seem to slow down and the panic was still rising from the human monk.

Yasha was swift to her feet. Her boots were heavy against the wood of the floor. Going to Beau’s bed side she sat down on the edge of it, “Beau!” She said placing a hand on Beau’s knee that was hidden underneath the blanket.

The panic that Beau held didn’t subside and clearly the touch didn’t help as she tried to kick away Yasha’s touch. Pulling away quickly she watched as Beau pressed herself against the head of the bed, “please don’t!” She stuttered out holding up a hand in some sort of way to protect herself. Her voice was raspy and held fear in it. Nothing like Yasha had heard before. Inside it broke Yasha and part of her held a fear of not knowing what to do.

Beau’s eyes were glassed over in a way that made her look right through Yasha and clearly whatever dream she had been having set her into a panic. She didn’t know what was real and what was not. Yasha didn’t know what to do. She didn’t have calm emotion like Caduceus but he wasn’t in their room and Jester was surprisingly still asleep. Bringing her hand up to Beau’s cheek she went to flinch away, her body tensing, her eyes closed tightly as if she was preparing for an ongoing attack.

Yasha’s touch was gentle and after a few seconds a soft light glow made itself known in the dark area around them. Yasha had no idea if this would work. She knew she could heal wounds but that was about it and Beau had no physical wounds. After a few seconds the panic Beau had slowly disappeared, the warmth of the healing was welcoming and familiar to her. It was a reminder on where she was.

What she was greeted with was different colored eyes looking back into her own blue ones. Worry was written all over Yasha’s face, something that was strange for a women who showed little emotion a lot of the time. The warmth of Yasha’s healing brought Beau back to the present day and she found her breath slowing down as she calmed. Reaching up she placed a hand on top of aasimar’s own hand.

“Yasha?” She spoke in a raspy voice. Her throat felt like it was on fire and each time she swallowed heavily it felt like sandpaper. Her heart was pounding in her chest as she took in the area around her. It had only been a dream. Thank the gods that it was but fear began to rise in her chest. Did she do anything? Did she say anything?

“Are you okay?” Yasha asked in a whisper.

Beau studied the features of Yasha’s face. She had no idea what time of the night it was but it was clear that the taller women hadn’t gone to bed yet. She was able to see the silhouette of Jester, still asleep in the bed next to her own. What had Yasha been doing up?

“Yeah, yeah. Totally fine. Just a bad dream I guess?”

“Just a bad dream? You were panicking really bad just a second ago. Would you like to talk about it?”

The concern never left Yasha’s eyes, her hand rested on Beauregard’s cheek. It grounded the brown haired women. A reassurance she wasn’t alone right now. She wasn’t at her home back in Kamordah. She was no where near her father. He couldn’t do anything but she could feel the shadow of his hand print on the cheek opposite of Yasha’s own hand, lingering there from the dream. It was less of a dream and event that plagued her mind. It was something she wished she could forget, or at least not fear for. It was something that already happened to her so why did it affect her so bad?

She hated that part of her. She was here now and with her new family who cared for her unlike her blood related one. He was something she shouldn’t fear but she did.

“It was about the night I left to go to the Cobalt Soul.”

Beau didn’t have to go into detail for Yasha to know what the dream had fully been about. What was troubling the human so much at this moment. It was strange seeing Beauregard so vulnerable. It had only happened a handful of time whenever Yasha was around. She knew how Beau tried to act all tough all the time, someone who seemed unbreakable but in reality that was the opposite and Yasha adored Beau’s emotions. Before Yasha could say anything Beau spoke once more.

“Did I say anything bad? Did I do anything?”

“Besides being scared and ‘please don’t’, there wasn’t much.”

“Shit- I’m sorry Yasha.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry about Beauregard, you were having a bad dream. It’s understandable how you reacted.”

There was nothing for her to be sorry about but deep down in some way she was. She felt like if she had disturbed any peace Yasha was having. Her mind was scrambled. Thoughts over lapping the other and each time she blink she could for just a second see the dream she had seconds ago; she hated it. Pulling her hand away from Yasha’s own, the aasimar lingered for a few seconds before doing the same. The warmth of her touch was now gone and Beau could feel herself already regretting that decision. She felt the headache making itself known as she brought her hands up and palmed at her closed eyes.

“Have you ever had a bad dream?” The question was sudden and she could see Yasha was clearly thrown off by it as she looked up at her.

“I have, they’re not fun.”

“Tell me about it. Do you think they ever stop?”

Yasha looked at Beau, confusion rested all over her face. Yasha was more evident about her confusion but deep in Beau’s eyes that same confusion sat there. Someone who could research all the answers, one of the smartest members of the Mighty Nein was lost, just as lost as Yasha was.

“I don’t know. I think so. They become less over time but I don’t think they’ll ever just got away.”

Beau groaned in response, clearly not the answer she was hoping for.

“You know he can’t hurt you anymore.”

“I know that!” She said a little too loud before lowering her voice once more, “that’s why I want it to stop. I feel like a coward.”

Yasha could feel the pain in her chest. How Beau felt so negatively about herself. She was the opposite and as thoughts came to her mind to tell her that they became a jumbled mess. Letting out a sigh she spoke from her heart instead.

“You’re far from a coward Beau. You’re so strong. You faced your demons head on. That is something that I don’t think I could ever do. You’re so wonderfully and I and the rest of the Mighty Nein can see that.”

Swallowing heavily once more she gave a small genuine smile, “thank you Yasha, but you’re pretty strong too.”

Giving a nod in reply Yasha spoke, “maybe writing it down can help.”

Beau could feel her brow furrowed in confusion. A blush of embarrassment was the reply the monk got from Yasha as she averted her gaze.

“That was a stupid idea. I just thought you know, I sometimes have trouble with my feelings and I write stuff like that down. Help me clear my mind.”

Beau was quick to connect the dots as she eyes widen in response.

“That’s a great idea Yasha. That’s not stupid at all. I’ll be sure to do that tomorrow.”

Turning back Yasha gave a nod once again.

“What are you guys doing up? It’s the middle of the night you know, is everything alright?” Came a tired voice. Both women turned their heads quickly to the source of the voice. Blue hair a mess; Jester rubbed at her eyes to clear the fuzzy vision she had as she yawned.

“Everything is fine Jess.” Beau replied as Yasha stood from the bed she sat on. Beau had to stop herself from reaching out for Yasha to ask her to stay. To be a anchor in the waves of emotion the monk had been feeling.

Blinking Jester’s eyes went back and forth between Yasha who was now standing at her full height and Beau who had puffy eyes, clearly from crying in her sleep, “what happened?” Worried rested in Jester’s eyes as she looked at Beau.

“I just had a bad dream is all, Yasha helped.”

Yasha didn’t say a word as she made her way back to the windowsill. Sitting down she rested her back against the frame as she crossed her arms over her chest, watching the two women, “We were just about to go to bed.”

Jester glanced over at Yasha then brought her full attention back to Beau, “do you want to talk about?”

“I can tomorrow. I don’t want to keep you awake, like I said Yasha helped. I think I should be okay.”

“You sure?”

“One-hundred percent. Thanks Jester.”

With an unsure look from Jester she sighed, “fine, but don’t think you can get away tomorrow without telling me. Goodnight Beau, goodnight Yasha, both of you get some sleep. We have a busy day tomorrow.” She yawned at the end.

“Of course.” Yasha said in response as she watched Jester lay back down to sleep.

“Hey Yasha.” Looking over she was meant with the blue eyes of Beauregard, “thank you. I appreciate it a lot.”

With a small smile tugging at the corner of her lip she spoke in a gentle voice, “you’re welcome.”

Laying down Beau’s eyes never left the outline of the figure who sat there looking out the window. Tomorrow she’d write her heart out and hoped that maybe it would help. That her thoughts wouldn’t be a mess, but right now she had no reason to worry. She had a angel looking over her and if Yasha had any idea that Beau was looking at her she made no comment. Sleep found Beau before Yasha, this sleep calmer than the first and all the monk hoped for was the same peace for Yasha; whenever sleep would find her too.

[fieryartemispublications]

Summary: In which Beau is kidnapped and held for ransom by pirates while on her way back from a mission to Vasselheim. It takes less than 48 hours for the Mighty Nein to come get her.

Rated T

No Archive Warnings Apply.

And here’s that fic I said I was going to post!

Tagging a handful of people that expressed interest! @northern-borealis, @tiamat-zx, @charoncaro

[louloutche]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Critical Role (Web Series) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Beauregard Lionett/Yasha Characters: Beauregard Lionett, Yasha (Critical Role), The Mighty Nein Additional Tags: Campaign 2 (Critical Role), Post-Campaign, unless they decide to keep going and to deal with the assembly who knows, Warning: Obann (Critical Role), But he is only mentioned, and beau's scar is mentioned but not described in detail, Established Relationship, Sapphic Sentinels, Sentinel Girlfriends, Critical Role Relationship Week, Critical Role Femslash Week, Beauyasha Week (Critical Role), Beauyasha Week 2021 Series: Part 5 of Adam and Luce’s Beauyasha Week 2021 Collection

Summary:

Day 5 of @beauyasha-week : Defend

Word Count: 3,400

Taking the Cerberus Assembly down should be a walk in the park, right? Convincing the King that he should follow through with his suspicions and go about reforming the organization should be easy, right?

Beau takes a look around. Martinet Ludinus Da'leth and Master Trent Ikithon are present too. The fact that they’ve been silent during the whole time Caleb was speaking is unnerving, as is the fact that they aren’t even trying to defend their own organization. Beau’s gut is going crazy and she doesn’t like it when her intuition is screaming that something’s off.

She steps forward, intent on delivering as truthfully as possible all the elements she’s gathered through time. But as she is about to speak, she hears a groan coming from her left, a little bit behind her.

She was right to trust her gut, just as Yudala said.

Notes:

Day 5 of Beauyasha Week! And it’s time that Beau defends her guardian angel for a change.

Just like the other fics, this one was written with @tiamat-zx, my partner in crime! Two more days in this wonderful week of celebration!

[disasterhumans]

I finally meta’d a thing about Beau in episode 54 because my brain has been terrible all week. I also ended up linking to like five other great meta posts that I’ve seen this week in the final paragraph. (Featuring the likes of @yfere, @kimabutch, @luckthebard, and @tiamat-zx)

One of my favorite moments between Beau and Dairon in episode 54 was when Beau yelled “How was I supposed to get better? You fucking left!”

From what we know of Beau’s backstory, she was accustomed to receiving nothing but neglect and abandonment from the adults in her life. As a result, the Beau we meet at the beginning of the campaign is gruff, closed-off, and generally untrusting. A lot of that is still there on the surface, but as time goes on, Beau has and continues to become one of the more vulnerable and caring members of the Mighty Nein.

One of the first moments we really get to see Beau display any sort of vulnerability is when she first meets Dairon. At first she’s standoffish and combative. But by the end of their fight/sparring/conversation, Beau is impressed and eager to learn. Dairon’s appeal to Beau was in part to draw a comparison between the two of them.

I was a wayward girl with no direction, was angry, and fighting at the world. And someone did this for me.

Dairon further argues that though she and Beau may both be “assholes,” sometimes assholes are necessary. 

Beau’s first interaction with Dairon very likely marks the first time an adult has not only accepted Beau as she is, but also actively related themselves to her. Similarly, Beau’s second interaction with them almost certainly marks the first time an adult has told her they’re proud of her, and that they’ll “always have time” for her. And I think Beau really did trust that, perhaps in spite of herself. Even if she’d spent a good deal of her child hoping that her parents might be proud of her and make time for her, it doesn’t seem like she was ever given any reason to think they actually would.

We see Beau’s insecurities and fears about Dairon being another in a long line of people who have disappointed her slip through the cracks a few times. She seems taken aback and upset when Dairon says she’s going to Bladegarden the very same day she promises Beau they’ll “always have time.” Yet, Beau still takes Dairon at her word that she’ll back within a month--in episode 31 when Xenoth says Dairon may be away for another 45 days (or at least, that’s how long they’ll wait before going after her). Beau once again seems to be on the back foot--she says “What?” in the exact same way she had when Dairon said they were leaving. Beau immediately shoots back at Xenoth that Dairon said “she’d be back within a month.” But alongside that frustration and disappointment, Beau still expresses concern for Dairon’s safety, and at first (angrily) assumes that the monks “sent her behind enemy lines.”

Prior to episode 53/4, Beau had met Dairon all of two times, and developed not only a liking for her, but also an apparent amount of trust and concern for their well-being. Beau’s trust is generally hard-won, but once acquired it runs fast and deep, and is apparently just as hard to lose. And while I’m sure Beau is accustomed to being disappointed, I don’t think she’s truly used to being let down by people she trusts--because she can count those people on two hands.

Beau is almost always willing to get directly confrontational with her friends when she feels its necessary. But she’s far more likely to get bratty, or standoffish, or just straight up fuck with (and extort) authority figures. So Beau getting angry about someone abandoning her--about someone lying to her (and someone who knows just how important the truth is to her, no less)--and being direct about it? Throwing it in their face? That’s a lot. That implies that even in her anger, Beau has some amount of trust that her frustration, disappointment, and vulnerability would mean something to them. And despite Dairon’s later insistence that Beau should not get “too close” to other people, Dairon does actually seem a bit hurt when Beau says the reason she’s in Xhorhas has nothing to do to them. Dairon also seems touched a moment later when Beau admits she was worried about them. Dairon follows-up soon afterward by telling Beau that she trusts Beau’s judgment.

Beau openly expressing her frustration and anger was its own sort of declaration of self-worth. Self-loathing is clearly a thing Beau still struggles with. But she’s received a lot of support over the past several months, and has received a lot of verbal encouragement and validation from Dairon in their first two encounters. Beau laying that accusation at Dairon’s feet--that they disappointed her, that they let her down--is also Beau saying “I deserve more than this.”   

I’m intrigued to see where their relationship goes from this point, and how much this conversation may have changed Beau’s course, even if only minutely. Because much of the conversation that follows from that point suggests that Dairon’s own biases actually do prevent them from fully trusting Beau’s judgment when she reaches different conclusions than they do. Dairon’s so locked into her belief that the Krynn are uniformly cruel, that she believes Beau’s more nuanced opinion can only be the result of naivete. And while I think Dairon’s comment to Beau that she doesn’t need anyone to witness her successes comes from a good place, it also misses the ways a lack of validation has instilled in Beau an inherent underestimation of her self-worth. This is not a perfect mentorship. However, there is clearly a deep amount of trust and care on both of their parts (even if Beau’s trust for Dairon does not extend nearly so far as her faith in the Nein). Much as I am wary of Dairon in many ways, Beau’s clear dedication to them, alongside her sheer stubbornness, might mean that in the end Dairon ends up learning a lot from her.