#Yes this is about Loid Forger

[spencers-secret-whump-account]

dad whumpees with daughters fucking slay actually.

Dad whumpee technically adopting his daughter, but more accurately, she adopts him.

whumpee who will take a bullet for his daughter (even if they wouldn’t admit it before)

found family!!!

basically any dads who will go to hell and back for their daughters.

young daughter ends up having to take care of dad whumpee while he’s sick or injured; angst ensues.

sorry if this sounds insane but I just love it when dads get whumped for their daughters

[beannoss]

Something I think about a lot and wonder if maybe gets overlooked in Twilight’s story and as vitally indicative of his character is actually in the very first chapter:

Anya isn’t needed for Strix. Twilight decides to adopt her anyway.

[Spoiler warning: Mostly this post deals with early chapters already in the anime but there is reference to chapter 62, which has not yet been animated and will be in season 3]

Twilight decides it — “I’m going to rework the mission so it doesn’t involve a child because that’s too dangerous” and he’s 100% right! Donovan Desmond is canonically a far right warmonger with fascistic authoritarian aims. His government made liberal use of the SSS — a group to mirror the Stasi — who continue to operate in morally dubious ways (much more likely they’re actively morally reprehensible, though we’ve mostly only had rumours of that so far). From what we can tell, Desmond is at best an absent father and likely actually worse than that: if that's how he treats his own children, imagine how he might treat others. And the timeline seems to indicate that the experimentation performed on Anya was done under Desmond's government — even if Twilight isn't aware of experimentation on children, he is aware of both human and animal experimentation under Desmond's government. Taking all that and also the complexity of Strix's aims, undoubtedly there were other things that could be done, more straightforward if not necessarily easier.

So. Why? Why entertain the change at all? And then, having entertained it, why go back when the reasoning is indisputable?

On the Doylist level, I think Endo wanted to ensure that Anya had some agency within the set up — Endo also does this with Yor. It would be much harder to be on Twilight’s side fully, or to trust him on an ethical level/take him as any sort of moral authority, if he were just straightforwardly using these two people. To have them be active and consenting participants (arguably to actually be affirming the arrangement: Twilight sets it up, but Anya and Yor actually make it happen) even if the audience only knows the depth of their knowledge/motivations/etc currently, shifts the power dynamic in important ways.

But it also the set up tells us important things about Twilight. He is largely impatient, cold, detached in chapter one. His overarching feelings towards Anya are, I think, real annoyance, real confusion, and real impatience. He just doesn’t understand this damn kid and it turns out she’s a person which is frankly unacceptable — he’d needed and anticipated an automaton, ideally of himself in miniature form. (Though I think one could ponder whether Twilight was, in many ways, an automaton himself at this point, but that's maybe for another meta 🙃)

He’s not entirely unmoved of course — we're given to understand he’s affected when Franky tells him how many times Anya’s been adopted and returned, and isn't amused by Franky's joke about names. Franky's comment — "Just don't get attached" — reinforces this. The prospect of “the future” perturbs Twilight when he’s reading the parenting books. His initial reaction to Anya’s kidnap is horror. All these are true too.

Then there’s also this, from earlier in the chapter:

It’s exposition, yeah, and it’s also exposing. "Hopes" and "joys" are very specific words to describe those events. It could simply have been "A marriage? An ordinary life?" but describing them as such — hope for marriage; joy in ordinary life — expose something of what Twilight feels about those two experiences and, on the flipside, they expose what he deems he's lacking. No hopes of intimacy; no joy in (an ordinary) life. There's an argument as well, of course, that he's being ironic but I don't think that actually invalidates the above analysis. Drawing attention to 'hope' and 'joy' at all are revealing, regardless of Twilight's tone in thinking of them. I think it's also interesting this panel, taken in conjunction with a pair of panels in chapter 62, Twilight's backstory. The above is almost a pulled out version of this below panel of Twilight's recollection of his childhood, and of course the returning image of not just a rubbish bin but a rubbish bin on fire when it comes to disposing of his identity:

Back to Strix. Both his final interaction with Karen and the whole everything of the framing of Strix is making Twilight think (and feel, ahem) things that he hasn't for some time. Twilight decides, I’m reworking this. It can’t proceed this way. Not because Anya is a pain in his ass, not because she’s not as (apparently) intellectually advanced as he’d originally thought, not even because he thinks he can find another child who would better be exactly what mission parameters called for. No:

And what changes his mind is Anya asking to come home.

One of the important parts of this to me is this:

He seeks consent.

This moment is a keystone, I think, to understanding Twilight. It’s also more telling than he maybe realises. Twilight is decisive — we all laugh because he spirals at the drop of a hat when his daughter or wife look even mildly upset but outside those (also very telling) scenarios, he makes decisions and he pursues them. Often he makes decisions quickly. He’s a dab hand at it; it’s a large part of why he’s as good a spy as he is.

He’d decided to change Strix.

Anya asks him, in essence, not to.

So, he doesn't.

But it's wild that he entertains keeping her request at all — why? Why even entertain it? It’s dangerous; it’s impractical; there are too many moving parts outside his direct control; Anya isn’t the sort of child he’d wanted for the mission if he’d spent any time thinking about what a child might actually be like; Strix is in many ways an extremely long shot anyway, Desmond could just stop attending for reasons unknown and unrelated; etc.

So, yeah, why? Maybe because of this —

In conjunction, I often think of this moment in the cruise arc:

Twilight first naming the feeling as lonesome, and secondly tacitly conceding that he perceives Yor as a companion and that that relationship is important to him, something to be missed. What makes this for me though is that Anya calls this out "Papa's you're so sappy" and Twilight's reaction is that of someone caught-out. He doesn’t say “nuh-uh!” but he may as well have. Essentially, something landed a bit close to home, hm? Maybe some of that hope for marriage? A soupçon of joy of an ordinary life?

Twilight’s loneliness underpins many of his decisions with his family — probably without him being fully conscious of it. I think he is at least somewhat conscious of it, but also if he looks too closely... Well, best not to. I could fill this post, I think, with images that demonstrate his loneliness throughout the series; that sorrowful/pensive close-up of his eye(s) is one of the abiding motifs for Twilight throughout. I'd probably start with this one from Twilight's backstory arc:

Anya's request plays directly off his loneliness. Still though, he doesn’t immediately capitulate — he emphasises Anya’s choice. Is she sure? The last day has been scary for a child (and for him, but he's ignoring that part) and Twilight, in his increasing recognition that Anya is a person, is probably aware in the back of his mind that he hasn’t exactly been warm or welcoming or at all patient with her. Things that people respond to — he's otherwise excellent at manipulating people, so of course he understands this. So. Given she'd just had this scary experience, given he hasn't exactly been great with her: Is she sure? She wants to come home — with him?

I think the moment may get a little lost because Anya says something riffing off his own earlier thoughts and self-revelation (featuring that shadowed, lonely eye motif again!)

Were this a post about Anya, I’d talk about how it’s an important character moment for her as well by way both of demonstrating her agency/choice and also that she isn’t nearly as dumb as Twilight thinks (and the audience, maybe, also thinks).

But in my view, she didn’t actually need to say anything about it making her cry. I think she could simply have said yes in that moment and Twilight would have agreed.

Twilight’s an unreliable narrator; he’s disconnected from his heart and that shrouds his own motivations from himself — something he actually also concedes in this chapter!

And it shrouds from us just how much he actually understands himself. He’s also a master of deflection. Easy to assume or say that bringing Anya home is just to align with Strix. Nothing more to see here; nothing else going on. But also that ripping off of the mask in the panel above — and the literal 'riiip' sound effects — also indicate to us that this is an unveiling to himself.

In my view, Twilight agreeing to Anya's request, deciding to go back to original mission parameters, actually shifts his motivations, subtly. Now he’s committed not only to the original mission goals, but also to Anya. He needs Anya to succeed at Strix, not only for Strix's sake, but also because otherwise the mission will end and she’ll have to go back to the orphanage, and he’s just agreed with her not to do that (not right away, in any case). I don’t think at this point he’s thinking it’s forever — his thoughts throughout the manga indicate he still expects the Forgers to be temporary. I don't think the shift in motivation is necessarily even conscious, but given the set up, I think something inside Twilight recognises that agreeing to bring Anya home is a compact, jointly engaged. Mostly all this has become subsumed into Strix: he makes decisions. He pursues them. He deflects, even from himself. Of course it's just for the mission; this saved him the trouble of reworking it, of figuring out something else. Nothing more to see; no need to think any more on it. And to be fair to him, Strix is very high stakes, resting pretty solely on his shoulders, so of course that is, objectively, motivation enough. Why even consider beyond that?

But I personally think that to the extent he's aware of it at all, there is something else going on, that he wants to have Anya for as long as it takes him to work something else out for her. If that's the case, then of course, we have Occam’s razor: the simplest solution may be the best one.

Maybe Twilight should just keep Anya himself, eh?

[Image description: gif from Spy x Family season 1, episode 1. Twilight and Anya have just found out Anya passed her entrance exam and are overjoyed. Celebratory, Twilight picks Anya up and swoops her into the air as they smile at one another. End image description]

[s-p-r-i-n-g-t-i-m-e]

mayhaps this is a hot take but I truly dislike “Loid gets murderous and overprotective of Anya dating Damian” content

like. there are sm reasons I dislike it

first off, just fundamentally, I hate that trope. I think parents being protective of children in general is cute, and even maybe protective against their partners to an extent, but it rlly feeds into the Western (esp American) notion of parents owning their children. it gets even grosser when it’s the dad and his daughter, it’s just a branch of ‘women and their purity having to be guarded until they’re properly married’ sexism

secondly, if this is pre-reveal (either Damian comes over/talks to Anya in front of Loid and it’s p obvious he has a crush, so Loid, of course, course notices, OR somehow, post-canon yet not revealed, they get together), Loid would absolutely use that to advance Operation Strix lol

obviously Loid is NOT a bad or uncaring father, he is absolutely not that, BUT he does also very vehemently care about achieving world peace thru his spy work, AND ANYA UNDERSTANDS AND EVEN AGREES WITH THIS (to the highest extent she can as a child, at least). he would never partake in extensive manipulation that’d harm Anya emotionally (or even Damian tbh, his whole goal is to create a world where no children have to cry) but he would DEFINITELY encourage their relationship in order to eventually, somehow get to Desmond the ghoul-eyed freak

thirdly, even if this is POST-reveal, I still don’t think Loid would be unreasonable. sure, he may apprehensive due to Damian’s family and more concrete examples of Anya growing up (MAYBE bc honestly I think Loid would be ecstatic with every milestone in Anya’s life considering how genuinely supportive and proud of her that he is) BUT. but

he, again, not only wants to create a world where no children have to cry, so he clearly values the youth and their quality of life, but ALSO KNOWS abt how shitty Damian’s father is. personally, I think he’d be GLAD that Damian has a safe place to come to, with ppl who’ll support him (unconsciously, bc Loid is very oblivious to his own emotions lmao)

anyways, tldr; the “Loid being super hostile to Damian dating Anya” trope is tired and sucks and we should move onto appreciating a trope that honours the CORE of sxf, more found family, where Damian joins the Forgers, even before he and Anya potentially marry (even before they date if possible tbh)

[kugiscki]

this is just a twiyor thing at this point. smiles so bright they could create world peace with them.

[piracytheorist]

Twilight Eyes Project: "The Prestigious School's Interview" (part 2)

First part here

Previous episodes analyses

The anime starts this part by immediately establishing that Twilight has planted a listening device in the interview room and is listening in, and shows him with Twilight eyes.

As he admits, this is the first time he feels so nervous during a mission that he's having trouble breathing. So his instinct to stay fully alert is pushed up to eleven.

His mission is to be serious and collected for the interview. Yet there is a subtle sign of distress on his face. The slumped shoulders add to that effect.

The time for the interview is finally here! Loid Forger thanks the teachers for having them, with "Twilight eyes" still on.

Walter Evans asks first, and Twilight studies him, his eyes stay on.

Until Evans addresses him directly about his relationship with Yor. The manga has a small panel of Loid having a speech bubble with a "!" in it, the anime stays on the shot and softens up his eyes.

However, they're still "Twilight eyes" as he answers. The anime adds a shot of him looking away as he talks about his first meeting with Yor.

The image he presents about said meeting is not representative of reality.

He wasn't blushing, nor was he looking at her with such eyes, when they first happened upon each other.

The manga lampshades this exaggeration by showing a new picture of him with Loid eyes and adding the comment "mental picture".

Fans can hope this will be real one day.

He continues on to praise Yor's dedication to their family. Though he has Loid eyes on, they're not the exaggerated, zesty wide eyes we've been used to.

He's more calculated here, more modest and down-to-earth. He's adapting to the strict environment of a school interview; he can't look like a carefree, happy-go-lucky dad here.

In the manga, he turns back to Twilight eyes as Yor is asked about him, and he watches her carefully.

Murdoch Swan enters the chat! Focused Twilight eyes show our guy's suspicions of him.

Evans asks why they chose Eden, and Loid answers like any dutiful Ostanian citizen would: because Patriotism™ and shit.

How to Kiss Ass in a delicate, elegant manner.

I am quite intrigued by the fact that he mentions patriotism among the things "Loid" wants his daughter to learn in Eden, especially when he says it with such a passionate face. This may be "Twilight eyes" but I doubt any of what he says reflects his real views.

However, this is a super crucial moment for the mission. The smallest slip-up and everything goes up in flames. He needs to keep his face perfectly controlled at all times; every single expression he makes is deliberate. And this expression is the face of a man who loves Ostania too much to be working for a foreign government! Right?!

Evans asks him about Anya, and softer Loid eyes are on.

That's a proud dad who believes his child is Eden academy material. Confidence is powerful in an interview like that, and he needs to sell it as better and as more convincing as he can.

A polite, light-hearted smile as he jokes about how sometimes it feels like she's reading his mind. That's how intuitive she is, trust me, I've definitely known her for longer than a week!

Evans asks Yor about her cooking, she hesitates, and Loid chimes in helpfully, with a humble smile on.

Swan continues being an asshole, grating on Twilight's nerves. Twilight eyes are back on as he tries to explain the absolute horror of a *gasp!* husband cooking at home.

He's full-on, seriously defending Yor here. The average Manly Man™ would be on Swan's side, willing to badmouth his own wife in order to appeal to the teachers' conservative sides, or would at least admit that his wife's lack of cooking skills is something they're working on. Instead, Twilight praises Yor's cleaning skills and caretaking of Anya, saying that's more than enough to warrant him cooking the meals.

Swan is having none of that, and Twilight is ready to double down, until Yor interrupts him, agreeing with Swan's criticisms. I'd wager a guess this is our first glimpse of his anger through real eyes, an anger that will explode a little later.

My guess that his eyes here are expressing his real irritation and aren't just "Twilight eyes" comes from the fact that he has nothing to gain from doubling down - quite the opposite, in fact. He even chastises himself for getting so worked up, as he gains his composure.

Once again, eyes hidden in the anime.

It's Anya's time to answer questions, and Twilight prepares himself. Anya manages to hold her ground, though mixing up her words a bit. Eyes are slightly narrowed, and though he smiles, this is another moment where everything can go downhill very easily, so he's still tense.

He explains her fumbling away with well-timed excuses and awkward smiles that I won't show because I've hit the pictures limit.

Anya declares she loves her parents and wants to stay with them forever... and her honesty touches Twilight. Real eyes. He has nothing to decipher and no-one to manipulate, so he's just left speechless.

But he has no time to ponder on why he reacted like that, cause Swan decides to strike again. Twilight eyes are back on, as he senses he can't afford opposing him again, and tries to respectfully divert the discussion away from such an inappropriate, sensitive question.

Anya starts crying, and we immediately switch to Loid and Yor's reactions. And let me tell you, that small line under his left eye does it all. To Twilight, she's ruining the interview and thus any chances of Operation Strix moving forward. But he's not upset at her - he's upset for her.

Struggling to salvage the situation, he keeps his face tight and controlled as Yor runs to console Anya and even exclaims what a cruel treatment this is.

The anime adds a shot of Twilight looking at Swan's direction as the latter starts dissing them, and losing some control on his expression in the process.

Despite that, he makes one last effort to hold himself together, telling himself it's alright if Swan smears them. They're not a real family, after all...

But then, he's had enough. Cue nightmare eyes.

A mess has officially been made. All he can do now is try to salvage his dignity and walk out with his head held high, though secretly having lost all hope things will work out.

We get Twilight eyes, but I'm leaning towards the theory that it was because he was trying to pull himself together. For Anya and Yor's sake, who were harassed by Swan's vile words, he needed to be the one to end things there and take them out of this upsetting environment.

But not without a last word. He allows his judgment and genuine anger and disappointment in Swan's behaviour to show through his "Twilight eyes".

Again, things went downhill, there's nothing to investigate, he can't manipulate his way into the school any more, but he feels the need to make a point about how he feels about not respecting the feelings of children. If he's to walk out, he's going to do it with his head held high because this asshole Swan hurt the feelings of two innocent people, and telling him off is the least he can do.

And he keeps that face on as they leave.

And that dignity is enough to inspire Henderson to act in his stead.

(continued in part 3)

(no manga spoilers please)

[cresneta]

In light of chapter 86, while I doubt this will actually happen anytime soon as it would put Yor's secret at risk, I kind of want Yor to shyly offer to teach Loid some self defense or offer to train with him so that he doesn't get hurt as much by the next unruly patient he has to deal with. I like to think that Loid would accept her offer for one reason or another - he'd either find a way to 'for the mission' it or perhaps he'd think back to the tennis arc and recall how training with Yor helped him there and decide it's a good idea to take her up on the offer. He's been slipping after all and maybe this would help him get back into fighting form? While he could decline out of pride or fear of outing himself or drawing too much attention to themselves or something, I still prefer to think he'd say 'yes' if she asked

[firewoodfigs]

autumn air / a carnival fair / blurring with time like the heat of a glare / like a child's peace, so rare

summer rain / scabbing old pains / you cut through the night like dawn / and bled into a brand new day / that couldn't linger, and the world / is yelling --

pick a side / pick a tribe / if everything's easy as black and white / there'd be no need for lying eyes // but what is right? and what is wise? / if everything's easy as black and white / there'd be no need for lying eyes

(leaving all that aside / i think i might still choose you / every single time)

and i hope you forgive me / for cursing our lives / fools like me can't help but be / misled, blindsided by love

two faced as a coin / too fazed to be alone / after knowing a warm bed and another aching soul / a place to call home / that i turned over like stone / and did i pull the rug out from under your feet? / did i leave you alone crying on the street? / if so, please don't forgive me / for cursing our lives / men like me don't deserve your hand in mine

(and if you would have me back / i would take it all back / if i could) (no take-backs, it’s touch-move)

[frogshipping]

I have been...considering adding the entire Forger family from Spy×Family to my f/o list. I just love them all soso sooo much

[thehusbandoden]

Just Let me Explain -Husband!Loid Forger x Wife!Reader

A/n: I'm not sure how good this is, feel free to let me know! <3

General info:

Genre: angst, slight comfort at the end \\ wc: 2,711 \\ posted: 03/14/24 \\ unclear ending

Summary:

You find out about Loid's mission.. how he was using you- and Anya.. that's what set you off the most. What hurt you the most.

Warnings!: a lot of angst, being used, misunderstanding, miscommunication, crying, confrontation, being ignored, ignoring, partner refusing to let go of you (briefly), Loid's mission, mentions of an orphanage, mention of an orphan, fear of putting a child back into an orphanage (briefly), mentions of a nightmare, child crying (briefly). I think that's all? Lmk if I miss any! <3

You lived the dream life. You were married to the love of your life, you had a darling young girl you’ve adopted, and you were loved by your small family unconditionally.  

Or... so you thought. That all changed when you found out your husband’s secret. A spy... he was sent on a mission to get married and have a child. Your entire relationship... was it all a lie? 

Tears stream down your face as you process the information time and time again. All of it... was for some mission of his? Did he ever even love you? You weren’t even sure at this point.  

You were currently curled in a ball on the bathroom floor, your back pressed against the door. The man in question spoke to you softly on the other side, asking for you to open the door and let him explain. You don’t respond, continuing to drown in your sorrow.  

Every minute that crawled by felt like an hour. Loid kept calling to you, his voice filling with more concern as you continued to stay silent.  

“Y/n... please... open the door. Let me explain, you’re worrying me.” 

“Don’t lie to me, Loid. I’m done with these mind games.” You whisper, your voice hoarse with sorrow. 

“Y/n... I-I don’t know what to say to that. Please... open the door.” 

“Why? So you can lie to me more? So you can gaslight me? So I can melt into your eyes and go back to believing that everything is okay?”  

“Y/n... please.”  

“No, Loid. I’m done. I’m so done with letting you control me by playing with my feelings. It was all a lie... wasn’t it.”  

Loid hesitates, his voice faltering as he attempts to fix the mess he made.  

“And Anya? She’s a part of your sick game too, isn’t she?” You mutter, your tears drying against your skin. Your sorrow was slowly growing into acceptance.  

“She is a part of my mission, yes.” He whispers.  

You let out a low chuckle filled with bitterness. “And what? What happens once your mission is finished? Do you leave? Stay with us? End us? End *me* now that I know?”  

“No, I wouldn’t ever kil-” his voice falters once more. 

You let out a low laugh that expressed your pain perfectly. “You’re a pathetic excuse as a father. I used to think you were so good to Anya. That you were the perfect father for her- but you plan on *leaving* both of us. Or do you plan on making it worse!? Are you going to end me and leave her in that run-down orphanage again!?” You snap, standing up. 

You feel your acceptance turning into anger as you throw the bathroom door open, glaring up at the man you once called yours.  

“Y/n I-”  

“Why Loid!? Why do you plan on ruining our lives?!”  

“Y/n it’s not that simple.” He sighs, moving aside to give you a path. You take it, storming out of the bathroom. You pace around the living room and kitchen.  

“Don’t give me that. You played friends until you captured my heart, gave me a flimsy love confession-” he flinched “-and then slid an *engagement* ring on my finger for some stupid mission!?”  

He opens his mouth to speak, but you don’t give him the chance to speak. “What about Anya!?” You yell, shoving a finger into his chest. Your anger boiled over at the thought of your precious little girl. She’s been through several homes already; she can’t go back to that horrid orphanage.  

“I-” 

“Are you going to leave us!? Kill me and leave her as an orphan again!? Tell me, Loid!” You demand, staring into his eyes. You used to think you would never treat him like this no matter how angry you got... but the thought of your baby losing another family threw out all self-control.  

“You know me better than that, y/n.” Loid sighs.  

“I don’t Loid. I used to think that you were a good man that worked hard to support his family, but I was wrong. All you are is a selfish pig who cares about nothing but himself.” You spit.  

Loid’s eyebrow twitches. You don’t notice. 

“Anya deserves better than this, Loid! Were you really planning on leaving us alone once your mission is finished!? Were you going to give us a goodbye or were you going to just leave!?”  

He still doesn’t say anything. Your anger slowly boils over, every second he ignores you adding another drop into the already over-filled cup of self-restraint. “I... do not know what I was going to do.”  

Another drop falls, spilling the rage over. You pull yourself away, so you don’t physically lash out. “I can’t believe I loved you!? I can’t believe that I trusted you, Loid! Was it all fake!?”  

Loid doesn’t respond.  

“Was it fake!” You repeat, trembling with rage and hurt. “Answer me!”  

Loid has an unreadable expression on his face as he looks into your eyes. “Yes, it was fake...” his eyes twinge with something you can’t read. Shrugging it off, you desperately try to hold yourself together.  

“So every time you said you loved me back. It was all a lie?”  

“Yes...”  

“Every time you told *Anya* you loved her back. It was a lie!?”  

An unreadable look in his eye makes your lip tremble. “Yes...”  

“So, you were planning on leaving us? All along?”  

“Stop asking questions, it’s annoying.” His gaze hardens.  

“Loi-”  

“I said, stop asking questions.” He glares down at you. “I do not love you, nor Anya. Either keep quiet and continue to help with my mission, or you will no longer be needed.” 

You feel something crack deep inside you. You try to hold yourself together as your hands shake uncontrollably. “I hate you.” You whisper. Loid flinched, watching you walk to the guest room. You close the door, locking it behind you.  

Once the door closes, you break down once more. Falling to the floor as your body is wracked with sobs.  

~~ 

Hours pass by before you come out again. Loid was sitting on the couch, reading a book. You would have smiled at the simplicity earlier this morning, but now all you feel is numb. You slip a pair of slippers on, grabbing your keys.  

“Where are you going?” Loid speaks up, his gorgeous blue eyes finding yours. You turn away, refusing to maintain eye contact.  

You don’t respond, walking out the door. Loid lets out a long sigh but doesn’t follow you.  

~~ 

“A-and then Sy-on boy made fun of Becky! I didn’t punch him though mama! I smiled like you said!”  

“Good job baby.” You mumble, a plastic smile on your face. The words of your precious girl weren’t registering in your head, you were too focused on the fact that your husband- ex-husband? You don’t even know anymore- is really planning on leaving both you and Anya when his mission is over. 

Glancing in the rear-view mirror, you see Anya close to tears. You immediately go into protective mode, your eyes hardening as you pull over. “Anya what happened sweetie? Did something happen at school? Are you being bullied? Did someone hurt you??” You bite your bottom lip to confine your rage, the metallic taste of blood staining your tongue.  

“N-no mama! Nothing happened at school!” Anya sniffled, trying to contain her tears.  

“What is it baby? You can tell me, I’m your mama.” You coo, rubbing her hair gently, pressing a comforting kiss to her forehead.  

“I-I u h... umm...” Anya starts to sweat, looking around the car. 

“Shhh it’s okay baby. You can tell me.” 

“B-Bond ate my peanuts!” Anya blurts out, showing you an empty bag of peanuts. There was no sign of damage from your family dog, she must have just forgotten that she ate them, which happens frequently.  

“Oh baby, it’s okay. We can buy more, alright? Next time tell mama what the problem is so we can fix it, m’kay?”  

“Yes mama.”  

“That’s my smart girl.” You kiss her forehead once more, savoring the relationship you have with her. You’ve always wanted to be a mother, and Anya fulfilled that desire. You were hoping you and Loid could have a few of your own one day, but that’s not going to happen... 

You make sure Anya is buckled before moving back to your own seat, strapping your seat belt on before pulling back onto the road. 

~~~ 

“Daddy! Look at what mama got me!” Anya squeals in excitement, bursting through the front door. She runs into the kitchen where Loid was pacing, embracing his legs. He flinches at the sudden entrance, but gives the girl a small smile, leaning down to her level. 

You walk in afterwards, shutting and locking the door. “Anya, don’t forget to change!” You call, placing a few grocery bags on the kitchen counter.  

“Yes mama!” She calls, pouting up at Loid. 

He chuckles, leaning down to ruffle her hair. “Go listen to your mother, Anya. And don’t let her see you with your shoes on the carpet, alright?” He smiles, an amused twinkle in his eye.  

You would have melted at the scene... if you didn’t know.  

Loid catches your gaze, causing you to frown. Even though he’s planning on completely ruining not only your life, but Anya’s he looks so... relaxed. 

You open your mouth to say something, when you notice it. 

His eyes... were red. Your frown deepens... you’ve only seen Loid cry once, and he never mentioned it when you did.  

~ 

It was before Anya, in the first few months of your marriage. You had woken up in the middle of the night to see him whimpering in his sleep.  

He whimpered “mom” and “dad” several times, tears slipping down his cheeks as he cried for anyone to help him. You gently woke him out of his nightmare, pulling him to your chest. He was shocked from the whiplash of being in such a traumatizing past one moment to being in your arms the next.  

He let you cradle him to your chest, his head comfortingly resting on your breasts. You stroked his hair, murmuring soft words of comfort to him, letting him recover from the terrifying dream.  

You laid with him for several hours before falling back asleep yourself. You don’t know how long he held onto you, but he was up the next time you woke up. He hasn’t mentioned it, and he probably never will.  

~ 

Words catch in the back of your throat. Before you’re able to formulate anything, Anya catches your attention. You look back at your red-eyed husband once more before turning to your little girl.  

“Anya, what have I told you about taking your shoes straight away?” You gently scold, lifting her off of the carpet.  

“Sorry mama!” Anya’s cute pout makes your heart melt, causing you to grow even softer. You sigh, placing her down in the entrance of the home. 

“Just take them off now and do better next time, alright?”  

“Yes mama!” Her giggle was worth the stress. You smile fondly at your baby girl, watching her take her shoes off.  

“Y/n.” Loid whispers, wrapping his arms around your waist, burying his head in your neck. You stiffen, clenching your jaw.  

“Let go of me.” You whisper, biting your lip.  

“Y/n, let me talk.”  

“Let go of me.” 

“Y/n-” his voice cracks. 

You pull away, walking over to Anya. Loid’s voice cracks again. You don’t turn to look at him. If you looked at his guilt-ridden face for too long, you would break. 

~~ 

Later that night. You were silently washing the dishes after Anya went to bed, your expression unreadable. Loid was in the living room, watching you work. He sighed, running a hand through his blonde locks. “Y/n?” He murmured.  

You don’t respond, your eyebrow twitching in irritation. Loid let out a strained sigh, standing up. He takes a step towards you, hesitating.  

“Y/n, please don’t ignore me...”  

You don’t say anything, biting your lip to maintain a calm composure... well as calm as you’re able to be. 

“Y/n.” His voice grew sharper as he steps into the dimly lit kitchen, his voice full of frustration and a hint of something you can’t understand.  

You continue to ignore him, causing him to let out another sigh, longer this time. “Y/n please.” He steps closer.  

Your fingers dig into your palms as you continue to ignore him. Your shoulders tremble from intense emotion, tears bubbling in the corners of your eyes.  

“Y/n...” he whispers, gently wrapping his arms around your waist. He gently takes your hands, intertwining your fingers so your nails dug into his hands instead of your own. You lift the pressure, not wanting to hurt him.  

“Let go of me.” You whisper, your voice trembling.  

“Y/n, just let me explain.” He whispered in your ear. Your breath hitched at his warm breath on your skin, wanting to give in to his comfort and break down in his arms. You get a hold of yourself, stiffening in his hold.  

“I don’t want to hear you explain.”  

“Y/n-”  

“Loid. Let go of me.”  

“Baby. Baby listen.” He whispers, shaking as he holds you close to his chest. You gasp softly, tears slipping down your cheeks. Loid has rarely used pet names for you, telling you that he thought it was childish and would much rather call you by name. You didn’t mind it, but it did make you feel so loved when you heard any pet name from his lips.  

“My love, it’s not what it looks like. Let me explain. Let me earn your trust back, just please... Please don’t leave. Don’t take my beloved away, don’t take our baby girl.” He sniffled, causing you to stiffen.  

Was he... about to cry...? 

You don’t protest any further, letting him talk. He hesitates at first, holding you tighter as he buries his face in your neck. “You’re right. This started as a mission. I was tasked to get a wife and child, enroll the child in Eden Academy, and get information on a man that is a great risk to us. It *started* as nothing but a mission, without any feelings attached.” Loid muttered, sounding exhausted and... ashamed?  

“Y-you don’t love me? Or Anya?” Your voice cracked with inexpressible hurt.  

“No! No baby I do. I love you; I love you to the moon and back. I love you more than myself- more than anyone, anything! And Anya too! I would do anything for my girls.” Loid quickly protests, holding you tighter, like he was afraid of letting you go; like you would disappear if he ever let you out of his hold. 

“B-but you said...”  

Loid spins you around, looking you dead in the eye as he fondly cradles your face, his thumbs gently wiping your tears away. “In the beginning, it was all for my mission. I’ll be dead honest y/n. When I met you, when we dated, I had zero feelings for you. But that changed. I fell in love with you-” his voice cracks, tears streaming down his own cheeks, “-I saw you for you saw how much you loved me, how perfect you are... that love confession was real. My love for Anya is real. And I would rather be gruesomely killed than ever let anything happen to my girls. I would- nor could never leave either of you. You are my world, and I cannot live without you.”  

Your tears quickened as you stared into the eyes of your husband, truth and overwhelming guilt swimming in their deep blue depths. You choke on a response, tears dripping off your chin.  

“Shhhh it’s okay baby.” He whispers, pulling you to his chest. He caresses your head, leaning his lips against your forehead. He kisses your forehead slowly and lovingly, adding another and another to the pile as you break down in his warm, comforting arms.  

“I promise baby. I would never leave you. I could never leave you. You are my world, my universe, my everything. I am nothing without you and our little girl. Our beautiful little girl.” He whispers, kissing your tears away.  

As you sob into his chest, he gently and lovingly dries off your hands before lifting you into his strong arms. He carries you to bed, cradling you to his chest as he lays down, cooing comforting words.  

You peacefully fall asleep in his arms, your face buried in his chest as you sob, listening to his soothing words as he slowly strokes your head and back.  

~~~~~

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Reblogs and feedback are greatly appreciated! <33

~~~~~

Do not copy, repost, nor plagiarize my work. Ask before you translate or use my work in any way -minus reblogging.

[bitter-me]

Hello! could you do Asaba Harumasa with A Loid Forger!Male!Reader who is his Fiancé? (For real not for a misson) And could you do like some general headcanons of it please?

Spy X Executive Officer

Harumasa Asaba | M. Reader as Loid Forger [SpyXFamily]

----------

"You gotta be careful. Because there's someone else back home who'd be heartbroken if anything happened to you."

----------

General Headcanons

First of all, the moment you two met Harumasa knew you are a spy. Come on now, he's responsible for Section 6's reconnaissance for a reason. In the main story he literally recognized the mercs are closing in on them by their shooting pattern alone. Are you kidding me.

Secrets out and from then on he'll rub it in your face that the Twilight was caught by an Executive Officer and through this process of endless teasing and "accidental meet ups" you two gotten quite close.

Yet despite making teasing the absolute daylight out of you his main mission. Harumasa would always comes to you for help with some missions of his. Come on! He has Twilight on speed dial! What kind of person would he be if he didn't abused use this power? The amount of times you have to pretend to be him for a meeting... too much to even bother counting..

Harumasa seems to have developed a habit since you two got together. One of which is how he looks like a wounded animal whenever you have to "be in a relationship" with someone. He's joking of course. But always seem to jump at the chance whenever Harumasa saw it.

But then again.. you're also using him for your own work as well. HAND has a lot of useful information and Departments. Having an insider on speed dial just make things ten times easier. In short both of you are using each other.. until it became something more as you two craves more with each interactions.

"You're cheating on me! I know I don't have much time, yet you--" "Darling, I am not seeing someone behind your back, it was a mission. We have this conversation before."

Endless teasing. Just endless.

By the way, are you a cat person? Well it doesn't matter you are a cat person now. Say hello to your son/daughter. Harumasa canonically has a cat, so..

Would jokingly as you to teach him some espionage with the excuse that it'll help him be a "more outstanding scout." You didn't, of course. Espionage is your thing. As if you'll let him steal your thunder like that.

Oh no. Harumasa isn't in the office again. He must have taken a sick leave. But how could he get another one? What? He has a doctor's note?

Yes, he would probably, maybe, say "please" a lot, just to get you to write him a doctor's note. Hey! Not his fault that your public image is a Psychiatrist! That just makes your notes 100% legal! And you are this awesome boyfriend of his right? So.. please~ he promise to give you kisses if you do write it~

Although Harumasa seems to know he can't use this trick a lot and uses it sparingly.

The proposal? It's the grenade proposal. I'm sorry but it's cute and it kinda fits ZZZ's world building. Both of you are running from the Ethereals and have gotten cornered. What a bad day it was. You were just about to propose when Harumasa got a call for a mission, since you don't want to waste any time. You decided to help your lover so that you can finally propose when all of these are done. But no, the universe hates you and decided to do this instead and damnit! You lost the ring! Cornered with nowhere else to go you spotted a grenade not to far away. Acting out of instincts you took it, pulling the pin and saying your vow as you put the "ring" on Harumasa's finger.

He ruthlessly tease you about the proposal though. Saying something like "Took you long enough. And here I thought I would die first before knowing the feeling of a ring on my finger." and, "A grenade pin? Seriously? How come those men and women you "marry" for a mission gets an actual ring while I--you're actual lover--only have this? I'm hurt!"

In the end you did get him an actual ring. As he deserved.

----------

Despite usually being seen slacking off. Harumasa works hard on his missions. After all, there's a reason as to why he's a member of Section 6. Naturally.

Yet he's not invincible. Harumasa knows that better than anyone else. Which is why he is now lying in the hospital bed with a sore throat and a heavy chest. It felt as if he were to somehow lie in a wrong way he'll start coughing out a lung. But he doesn't have to worry. He has [Name}. And that man would go full on doctor on him in a heartbeat.

"You're an idiot sometimes." [Name] sighs, sitting on the chair by his lover's bedside. He can't believe Harumasa had willingly injected that thing. Onto him like that. Sure, he understands. Harumasa can't let that thing exist in the world. But seriously?! Did he even think for one second what could have happened to himself if he weren't this lucky?! What if it's a one time thing?!

"You idiot." He whispers underneath his breath.

Harumasa really has to be careful.. because there's someone else back home who'd be heartbroken if anything happened to him.. and that person, is him. [Name] Forger.

For all of his time as a spy. No one had ever made him feel so.. complete. The thought of settling down never crossed his mind. But with Harumasa.. he might just consider it. But..

How is he supposed to settle when the one he loves is constantly on death's door?

[Name] snapped out of his thoughts the moment he registered the warm feeling on his hand. Harumasa's on top of his. Turning his head towards him, [Name] saw Harumasa giving him a reassuring smile. "I know.. but I'm your idiot."

"Don't worry too much. I'm not going anywhere. After all, no one cares more about my life than me."

[whateversawesome]

Spy x Family Ch. 106: Violence

One of the things about having grown up in a less-than-ideal family is that, in the future, when you have your own family, you can build it differently.

We still don't know how Yor grew up but we do know that [Redacted] was in an abusive situation. It's easy to learn after seeing violence happen once and again, to do the same and say "that's what my dad used to do and I don't know better." However, there's also a different path...

Since there was very little dialogue, it may seem like not much happened but we learned a lot about the Desmonds in this chapter. Here are few observations about the Desmond:

It's very noticeable Donovan Desmond has absolute control over his family. Melinda clearly doesn't want to be there but she is there because she has no choice.

Violence is not always physical; he doesn't have to slap his kids into submission. Emotional and psychological violence do as much damage. Did you notice that "twitch" and those eyes?

That's fear. That's control. That's violence.

And you know what happens when there's fear? Well, the result is distance. There's so much space between them and they're supposed to be a "real" family:

I don't think Donovan Desmond wanted to have dinner with his family. He wanted to remind them who is the boss.

We still know very little about Donovan Desmond. Everything points out at him being the "big bad guy", however, Endo is a master of developing morally-gray characters. So my theory is that Donovan Desmond may turn out to be a good leader for his people and Ostania, maybe someone who tried to stop the war. However, he's also going to turn out to be a horrible father and husband. The opposite of our Loid Forger, who is a devoted father and loving husband (yes, even if he doesn't want to admit it).

I wonder if at some point we'll see Desmond lose control with one of the members of his family. Right now, no one even dares to talk to him, but maybe one day Damian (with Anya and his friend's influence) will be brave enough to attempt to talk to him. Believe it or not, he's a good candidate to step out of line and anger his father.

There are also some theories that say Donovan Desmond can read minds and I think it's a possibility. If that's the case, that means he already knows Twilight is a spy and is just letting WISE play a little before taking action. It's a scary possibility.

A final note: Those kids are better off living in the dormitory. Yeah, Damian may feel abandoned by his parents but look at this face!

At least in the dorms he's not being terrorized by his own dad and also, by seeing other kids and other families, he's also learning this isn't the standard. Hopefully in the future, when he has his own family, he'll choose to do things differently.

[cloudysonder]

Loid POV on Red Circus Terrorist Arc

I know that the manga doesn't really dwell on this very long, especially because we're mostly experiencing this event through Anya's POV, but... can you imagine what Loid must've felt? For the great spy Twilight to come "racing back here" from a business trip that was probably significantly far away?

Imagine Loid in his Dr. Forger front, socializing with his fellow doctors on a business trip, when he suddenly gets some spy intel that an Eden College school bus has been hijacked by terrorists.

His heart drops without his permission. He knows that Anya was going on a field trip today. She'd been excited all through breakfast, talking about museums and heroes and spies and wars --- he hopes selfishly that it wasn't Anya's bus (for Operation Strix, of course).

More intel gets to him. It is Anya's bus. Moreover, the attackers are the Red Circus, a violent terrorist organization with a rampant hatred of the upper class, its leader driven by vengeance for his own daughter. He stops breathing--- rambles out some excuse to his coworkers to get away--- somehow still has the sense to hotwire a car instead of driving his own--- gets to the scene, forgets to put on a different face in his panic, just steals some officer's uniform as he rushes to the scene---

How could he have let his guard down? How could he have lulled himself into such a false sense of security? The country isn't at war, yes, but it isn't stable, either. Sending Anya to Eden was never going to be safe. He should've sent her back, just like he almost did when she first got kidnapped. He's not good enough to protect even one little girl-- he's a useless excuse for a spy.

He's utterly useless in the end, even as he does get to the scene. It sorts itself out (somehow???) and Yor is there to comfort Anya, always the loving mother (thank god for Yor, he thinks, and he should be alarmed at how much he relies on her when he doesn't know what to do)

he hears later that his stupid-ass kid was actually the one to de-escalate the situation by getting a FUCKING (fake) BOMB STRAPPED TO HER NECK. He's shaking in his boots--- he's never met or seen anyone with as little self-preservation and bravery as this kid that's now under his care. Is she stupid? Is she deeply traumatized from her time at the orphanage? This creature is incomprehensible to him, but she scares the shit out of him constantly.

How do you take care of a kid like that? A kid that's gone through so much in her short life, who would rather be in life-or-death situations than be apart from him, a random suspicious man she's only met a few months ago?

Twilight has no fucking clue.

He can only self-flagellate for so long. It's a waste of time. He may not know everything about Anya, but he has learned some things.

He hopes that he can find a bakery that sells peanut cakes.

[onyxmilk]

Twilight x f!Reader; "Missing"

notes; i <3 angst writing!!! tw; angst, pregnancy, reader is referred to with she/her pronouns, loid went to get milk without even realizing wc; 1.5k

[YourName] stood there, uncharacteristically caught off guard. She knew there would be missions where Twilight couldn’t say where he was going or how long he’d be, but right now? When she had the biggest news of their lives to share? That simply was crueler than just cruel.

The woman looked down, nodding toward The Handler. “Uhm, okay, well, thank you.” [YourName] said, swallowing thickly before going to turn around. “I know you’re with child, (AgentName).” The Handler said making [YourName] halt in her foot steps, “I-I may be.” [YourName] replied.

“That’s wonderful news. Do you want me to send a message to Twilight?” The Handler asks, and as much as [YourName] wanted her husband to know- she shook her head. “No, I’ll let him know whenever he gets back. Even if it’s years later.” [YourName] said before heading back home.

Once home and the doors were locked, windows drawn to a close too, [YourName] finally broke down. She wasn’t ready to be a single mother, but from the way The Handler wanted to hand such a useless message to Twilight, [YourName] knew it was going to be quite a long time before [YourName] gets to feel Twilight’s lips against her own.

[YourName] curled into a ball on the couch, finally finished crying her eyes out. Afterwards she took a shower, made a dinner she’d share with her baby, and then headed to bed for the night. [YourName] didn’t dream that night, she just blinked and it morning.

She called out of work for the month, only returning to the office when she was five months pregnant, or around that time period. She didn’t expect to open the door and confetti be popped around her, but it happened. She should have expected something like this.

“Congratulations! We heard you were pregnant!” A co-worker said excitedly, [YourName] simply nodded with a bittersweet smile. “Oh, yeah, five months along.” [YourName] says, gently placing a hand on her forming bump. There was a small office baby shower for [YourName] which she had no choice but to accept.

For the next five months, [YourName] was pampered around the office, not that she asked for it- it seemed to just happen. [YourName] found out about the mission her husband had been sent on, and all she could summarize from it was that he played therapist and dad for another family.

The day someone accidentally spoiled what Twilight was doing, [YourName] excused herself to the bathroom where she cried out everything she had held back. She wanted Twilight to play father for the family they had made together. She would exit her bathroom, that’s when her water finally broke.

Her co-worker rushed her to the nearest hospital, which happened to be the one Twilight played Loid Forger at. [YourName] sat in her room, holding her arms, alone. She never in a million years thought she’d be alone in this situation, shes read many books where women have been, but she swore she’d never be alone in labor.

[YourName] munched on ice chips between tears, that’s when a familiar face had knocked on the door and entered, “Nightfall-“ [YourName] said clearing her throat, wiping her face, and setting the cup of ice chips down. “Twilight is simply across the building, we just have to tell him that [AgentName] is in the bit thing unit, he’d come.” Nightfall explained to [YourName], it just made the pregnant woman scoff.

“It’s not fair to distract him from his work, he has a wife and daughter to act out with.” [YourName] says, looking away from Twilight’s co-worker. “Yes, true, but you’re his real wife and you’re giving birth to his first born.” Nightfall says as she attempted to convince the woman to tell Twilight about her situation, “I made my decision, maybe he should’ve tried to reach out through The Handler.” [YourName] says.

Oh. Yeah. Nightfall was suppose to give those check in messages to The Handler. Oops. Nightfall sighed, “Your secret is safe with me.” she promised before exiting the room.

[YourName] sighed, and before she knew it, she was giving birth. The whole pushing and breathing thing was so much harder than she expected. She swore she almost fainted, but she shot right back into consciousness when she heard the cry of her baby. “It’s a girl!” The doctor said, gently setting the baby on [YourName]’s chest.

[YourName] cried happy tears for the first time her entire pregnancy. Instantly, baby girl stopped crying and cuddled into her mom’s chest. It melted [YourName]’s heart, she never wanted to let go of such a tiny thing before. Eventually, the nurses had to take the baby girl to wash her up and place her in a warm blanket and hat.

With the help of a co-worker, [YourName] got home with her daughter three days later. Lotte, meaning ‘free’ in German, settled in nicely. How [YourName] wished she had Twilight with her on some nights to cheer her up and explain how he’ll get Lotte so that she could get rest instead. But [YourName] pushed through, not letting herself get too down in the dumps due to it.

Months would pass, Lotte was finally almost ten months old. Lotte watched as her mother scattered around the room, going in and out of the kitchen, cleaning. It started to bother the baby that she wasn’t getting the attention she wanted, so she began to get fussy, which her mom simply put off as ‘hating the boppy���.

Fussy turned into crying, and [YourName] was right there. She held her daughter in her arms, gently rocking her, trying everything in her power to calm her down. “M..” baby Lotte mumbled “Mama..” she cried. Despite the crying, it was clear as day who Lotte was crying for and it warmed every ounce of [YourName]’s broken heart.

It had been over a year and some things had changed since Twilight had gone on his mission. It had been over an entire year, and since there were still no messages from him- [YourName] didn’t send any to him either. It broke her heart that she had to play single mom when she was legally married to Twilight.

It just proved to herself that she could do this alone, sure she had a bit of help from co-workers, but it was mostly her doing all the work! The thought of possibly divorcing him had floated through her head, but she loved Twilight way too damn much to go through with it.

Another year would pass and Lotte was walking now, sure she had a little wobble to her walk- but she was walking! It was one of those nice days where she was sure nothing could’ve gone bad, so [YourName] decided to take Lotte out for a little treat. Over the last two years, [YourName] realized her daughter loved those soft cake pops from a local café. So her daughter would get a cake pop and [YourName] would get something to drink.

As [YourName] entered into the café with Lotte in her arms, she hardly noticed Franky and a pink haired child sitting together. By the time the mother did notice, Franky had noticed her fully first. [YourName] set Lotte on the chair and unwrapped her cake pop before breaking it into fours and taking the stick away, she then sat down next to her daughter.

That is when Franky had approached her, now she knew who he was- he was the closest thing Twilight had as a friend. “[AgentName]?” The short man asked, out of habit [YourName] turned around slightly to face whoever called her name. “Oh.. Franky..!” [YourName] said, blinking a few times to try and see better.

“Oh my god, it is you!” Franky said, dropping the child’s hand. “Where have you been? Who’s this?” He asked, referring to Lotte. Lotte was too busy stuffing her face to notice a stranger doting over her. [YourName] sighed, “I’ll tell you who she is if you tell me who she is.” she said making Franky nod.

With some hesitation, [YourName] would finally tell Franky; “This is Lotte, she’s Twi’s and I’s daughter.” she announced. Franky practically blew up as he malfunctioned, he covered the pink haired girl’s ears before he spoke, “Thats not possible. Twilight has been on his mission for two years.” Franky defended, “And I was pregnant before he left, now who is she?” [YourName] replied, gesturing to the child Franky had with him.

The pink haired girl pushed Franky’s hands off her ears. “I’m Anya Forger! Loid and Yor Forger’s daughter!” Anya introduced, but then it kicked in for Anya that THIS woman was Loid’s REAL wife. “Your baby is pretty.” Anya said, trying to break tension.

“I’ve got to go.” [YourName] scoffed, cleaning up her and Lotte’s area before getting up and picking her daughter up and going to leave. “He didn’t want to leave, [AgentName],” Franky said across the café. “Yet, he did and hasn’t sent a message since.” [YourName] says before exiting the café.

Franky had a lot of information to pass to Twilight this afternoon.

[thebisexualdogdad]

Loid Forger x male reader headcanons where the reader is Loids handler and they've been secretly dating for years before his mission pretending to be married to Yor?

Loid Forger x male!reader

● you had been Loids handler for years now

● and also for many years you had secretly been lovers

● no one at the agency knew and you couldn't be together in public for a variety of reasons so you had to remain professional when he started operation Strix and had to pretend to be married to Yor

● of course you knew nothing was actually going on between the two of them but it still didn't feel great watching them hold hands or him kiss her cheek when you were shadowing them out and about

● he is aware of your feelings and makes sure you knows his heart belongs to you by being extra affectionate when you are alone

● you had introduced yourself to Yor and Anya as a coworker of Loids at the hospital

● Anya reads your minds and realizes you're in love with each other and in her mind refers to you as “papa's boyfriend”

● you come over for dinner a lot under the guise of the single bachelor who can't cook but likes a home cooked meal and in return always end up helping Anya with her homework

● Yor while she and Loid are washing dishes, “it's so nice how great Y/N is with Anya, somehow he's even able to get her to turn off Spy Wars and do her school work”

● Loid smiling watching you with Anya, “yes he's a good man”

● Yor has figured out that the two of you are more than friends but she doesn't feel it's her place to bring it up so she doesn't

● Loid claiming to have “late night shifts at the hospital” when he's really just having a date with you at your own home

● complimenting him about how handsome he looks in his suits which makes him blush

● just like how he gives you butterflies whenever he calls you ‘my love’

● he has a trunk under his bed full of love letters that's you've written him over the years

● the letters are written in special code that the two of you have created in case someone were to ever find them

● which of course Anya does find them when she's playing with Bond and his ball rolls under Loid's bed and he's too big to crawl under and get it himself

● even though you didn't sign them she knows they are from you, “how come Y/N gets to tell me how to write when none of these letters make any sense!”

[loidbriarforger]

Director Gerald Gorey walks down the hall of Berlint Hospital’s psychiatric wing, reading over a few reports. He then looks up to see Dr. Loid Forger speaking to a dark haired woman.

“Hitting on one of the young nurses, eh, Forger?” Gorey thinks to himself, “Wait, that’s not one of ours…”

It’s then he notices her uniform isn’t one he recognizes. Gorey walks closer to them to scope it out.

“Ah, Dr. Forger!” He says.

Loid and the woman turn theit attention toward him.

“Director Gorey, good afternoon!” Loid greets with a smile. “Director Gorey, this is my wife, Yor.”

“Hello!” Yor greets, “It’s very nice to meet you, sir.”

She extends her hand out to him. Gorey returns the gesture and the two shake.

“Pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Forger!”

“So this is the Missus, huh? My, what a pretty thing.” Gorey thinks. “Then again, I’m not surprised a chap like Forger could bag a woman like her.”

“Yor came to visit me for lunch.”

The director plasters a fake smile, “My, how lovely of you, Miss Yor!”

“I don’t care about your perfect marriage, you dope.” Gorey thinks, tuning the young couple out as they start to prattle on.

“Well, we should be heading to lunch. I know I’m hungry!” Loid smiles.

“Yes, after I accidentally burnt your eggs this morning, I know you must be, pumpkin.” Yor responds.

Gorey’s ears perk up slightly.

“Burnt the eggs, huh?”

He sees an opportunity to take a jab at Yor for her mistake.

“My, you must be a clumsy one to burn something as simple as eggs, Mr. Forger.” Gorey chuckles, patting Loid on the stomach. “No wonder old Forger here is withering away.”

Yor’s face grows pink.

“W-well… I am a bit of klutz when it comes to cooking.” She says sadly.

Loid immediately interjects, “Nonsense, Yor!”

“What a shame! What kind of wife doesn’t know how to cook for her husband?” Gorey shakes his head.

Yor goes quiet, hanging her head low. Gorey wears a sly smirk, seeing he’s easily gotten to her. Yor then lifts her head and responds in a calm, yet firm tone.

“Excuse me, sir, I don’t wish to be rude but please keep your judgements of me to yourself. I’m aware of my faults and am working my hardest to change that. For Loid and our family.”

Gorey stands there bewildered by her response. Surprised by her resolve.

“Why, this little hussy!” He internally yells.

Gorey chuckles, “And I sure hope you do, Miss.” He says, smugly.

“Uh, Yor- how about you head onto the cafeteria. I need to speak with the director for a moment.” Loid suggests.

He gives her a sweet smile of reassurance. Yor gives her husband one in return and nods. She then looks back at the director.

“I hope you have a good afternoon, Director Gorey.” She tells him.

“And you as well.”

Yor then begins walking towards the cafeteria. Both men watch as she walks away. Gorey taking in the sight of her from behind.

“Not bad…” Gorey thinks.

A hand is then placed on his shoulder.

“Director…” Loid says.

The director rolls his eyes and then focuses back to Loid.

“Yes, Doctor-“

Gorey stops mid sentence, paralyzed in fear as Dr. Forger’s fierce gaze pierces right through him. Gorey then begins to shiver as Loid’s grip on his shoulder tightens slightly.

“Don’t. Ever. Talk about my wife like that ever again. Am I clear?”

His voice deep and sharp as if he were about to rip Gorey in half. Gorey trembles like a leaf in a wind storm.

“Uh-uhm. Y-y-yes. D-Dr. Forger. P-Please, let Mrs. Forger know I send my deepest apologies for my rudeness.”

Loid lets go of his shoulder and pats it gently.

“Thank you, Sir.” Loid says, “Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

Loid then walks around him.

“Yor! Wait up!” Loid calls.

Gorey stands in the hallway still stricken by fear.

“W-WHAT WAS THAT?!” His internal voice screams.

[donovan-desmond-official]

made an oc aka Donovan's brother and the only reason he exists is to be extremely unbelievably sexy and charming. Like the first scene i wrote with him (scrapped) was just him hitting on Yor randomly.

I just wanted to make a character that would just make Twilight feel jealous and insecure. Just seeing Yor be charmed by this random man evokes a new emotion in him and he just can't take it.

(Then there is his wife who is a whole other story)

Twilight is met with a new awful challenge.

On one hand, if Yor does get close to Donovan's brother (his only living sibling) it will be his one way ticket into his life and will allow him to complete the mission with ease.

On the other hand, watching your girl get rizzed by a under 40 multibillionaire is just mad humiliating.