#Yes its pruk

[the-heaminator]

Currently having hetalia and goodomens crossover brainrot aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[koolkat9]

What are your favorite musicals and which musicals would you assign to your favorite countries based on personality? Yes, This is me asking what Music themes you'd assign them too I guess without looking at youtube and seeing videos 10 years old. I miss seeing Character Theme videos.

Oooh this is a good one! I'm also going to share musicals that make me think of some ships too because I want to ramble about the two musicals that make me think of a GerEng AU.

Okay but Characters.

Canada- Dear Evan Hansen

I know. Kind of basic. But I love DEH. "Waving Through a Window" is such a Mattie song. But what really sells the idea for me is that "So Big / So Small" is such a good song for Royal Red Bros. Francis is the dad that left, and Arthur tries to pick up the pieces, but also fails Matthew. Just the dynamic between Evan's Mom and Evan is just perfect for these two. Like Evan's mom does love Evan, but being a single mom isn't easy and to provide for him she has to work ridiculous hours so she's not there for him physically. Which is a similar postion Arthur finds himself in.

Also the lines

"That night I tucked you into bed

I will never forget how you sat up and said

'Is there another truck coming to our drive way?

A truck that will take mommy away.'"

Just hit me so hard with feels for Arthur and Matt. Just imagining a little Mattie asking Arthur one night if Arthur is going to leave him behind too. Because Francis left and Arthur seems so much more focused on Alfred. Matthew it terrified it will happen again. And it breaks Arthur's heart.

ALTERNATIVELY

Canada - Next to Normal (Specifically the song "Superboy and the Invisible Girl")

I don't know enough about what this musical is actually about other than we follow our main character Diana who is struggling with bipolar disorder and hallucinations of her dead son. And basically I think it shows how her condition affects her family?

But we did "Superboy and the Invisible Girl" for some concert once and I actually played Diana. And every time I rehearsed this song, all I could think of was ACE Family.

It is primarily Natalie, Diana's daughter, feeling neglected and ignored because of her Mother's grief over her son's death.

This line really makes me think of the two, especially after Alfred has become independent and Matthew attempts to pick up the pieces of a broken Arthur:

"Super boy and the invisible girl

He's the one you'd wish would appear

He's your hero, forever your son

He's not here, I am here"

---

America - Hamliltion

For obvious reasons. American history. Main character is smart, but also so impulsive. "I'm not Throwing Away my Shot" always make me think of Al.

---

England - Mary Poppins

Of course I choose something obvious. You know how much I love Arthur with kids. And Mary Poppins is that strict parental figure, but she does want what's best for the kids in her care, and I think that's perfect for Arthur.

Also I just love imagining Arthur singing "Feed the Birds."

Also also. get 2p England involved and make Oliver Bert. So double the Englands making it more fitting. Alternatively Gilbert could be Bert to make it Pruk instead.

---

GerEng - Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

I have this whole musical casted with Hetalia characters. But the summary first because its probably a musical not many know. I really don't know how to encompass everything so I'm just going to steal the summary from IMDb:

"A down-on-his-luck inventor turns a broken-down Grand Prix car into a fancy vehicle for his children, and then they go off on a magical fantasy adventure to save their grandfather in a far-off land."

God I had orginally had a long decription of a cast list for this but I'll ramble about that in another post. All you need to know though:

Arthur as Caratacus Potts - The down on his luck inventor and single father. Sometimes his work distracts him, but he really does love his kids

Ludwig as Truly Scrumptious - A candy heiress who meets the Potts family after almost running over the children when they run out into the road. She and Caratacus kind of get off on the wrong foot when she argues that the kids should be in school and not running around. But after he impresses her with his inventions and she joins them on their adventure in their magic car, the two fall in love.

Peter as Jeremy and Jemimah - Because I can't think of a second child to go with Peter I just have Peter right now. Because I love GerEng being dads to him.

Anyway. The songs.

First we have "You Two" which actually makes me imagine things separate from this au. Because this is also so good for ACE Family. I ramble about it more here.

"Doll On a Music Box" One of my favourite songs to listen too to daydream about GerEng. Just them pulling the same stunt Caratacus and Truly do to rescue the kids. Also Ludwig dressed up as a doll is a nice image.

"Lovely Lonely Man" Could work for either of them, but I always have loved the idea of Ludwig singing this about Arthur. Because Ludwig fell fast just like the song suggests while Arthur took a bit of time. It's just a perfect monologue of Ludwig admitting his feelings to himself.

God I could go on but I'll save the rest for a separate post

---

Okay one last one for GerEng! Music Man.

Summary from Stage Agent: "There’s trouble in River City! When smooth-talking con man Harold Hill arrives in a small, tight-knit town in Iowa, he expects to dupe its residents with his elaborate moneymaking scheme: Despite his complete lack of musical literacy, he will convince everyone that he is a brilliant bandleader and recruit all the boys in town to form a band, pocketing the cash for instruments and uniforms. The problem? Some of the town members, especially the stern librarian, Marian Paroo, don’t quite buy Harold’s story. As Harold struggles to keep his scheme afloat, he also finds himself increasingly attached to the townspeople, who have all experienced a positive change since Harold came to town. Complicating matters even more, Harold is also falling head-over-heels for the beautiful Marian."

God I could go on about this one too, but keeping it brief:

Arthur as the con man Harold Hill selfish and prideful only to have a change of heart by forming genuine connections within the town.

Ludwig as the stern yet also hopeless romantic Marian. That despite knowing Arthur is a con man sees him grow and falls for him

"Goodnight My Someone / Seventy-Six Trombones (Double Reprise)" The two leads main songs coming together with them singing each other's half way through. God I just love thinking of GerEng for this scene so much! I think its so romantic to sing each other's themes to each other.

Also "Goodnight My Someone" on its own is very fitting for Ludwig. As is Marian's chacter as whole. Both are stern indivduals, refusing to take nonsense from anyone. They seem like a stick in the mud, perhaps a little cold, but both have a sweetness deep down, longing for connection. And "Goodnight My Someone" is when we first see this side of Marian.

"Marian the Librarian" Just the back and forth and tension in this song. Hill/Arthur is kind of a dick. Flirting, but really he's just playing a game at this point and bugging Marian/Ludwig at work when they're clearly aren't having it. It's another fun scene I like imagining GerEng. Especially since Arthur is really pushing his luck angering someone who could snap him like a toothpick he'd be into that let's be honest but that's not a discussion for this blog

Thank you anon for letting me combine my love of musical theatre and my love for Hetalia together! I encourage more questions like this actually so don't be scared guys!

[kevin-the-bruyne]

was any of the other zee pruk shows worth it? i only know why r u and cutie pie 😍

I haven't seen You Never Eat Alone yet and I plan to eventually but then I'll be fresh out of Zee content, forever condemned to DMD MVs till he comes on as Jet in Middleman's Love.

The short answer is: no

The long answer is: depends on how much his nipples mean to you.

did I fast forward through 15 episodes of Cheating Spouses just to watch Zee thot? Yes.

Would I do it again. Also yes.

Would I recommend others do it? Absolutely not.

Remember 15 is arguably worse because it is the one show where Zee's character does actually go through with the raping (he's so rotten it's not even funny but everytime he's on screen im like but i can change him). I had to stop before that reveal happened (around ep 6) because I was at the crossroads of heaven and hell and the Holy Father said, 'Nani are you ready to risk being into this?' and I said cleanse my soul Father for I have sinned long enough.

In terms of an actual review of RMB 15 - its a very so so drama and the gore and shock value doesn't match the intensity of the underlying mystery. I'm not super into gratuitous gore. It should have been a mini series or really a movie - i think with brevity it might have actually been good - but why they drag it for 12 episodes is beyond me. You can start it if you want to see Zee (his acting is fairly good) and Mii2 (who are quite cute as always) - and then just stop when you get bored.

Honestly? just watch him be an idiot with the other DMD boys in those unsubbed Japan trip videos on Domundi TV if you're desperate for more Zee

[whyamistillwatchingtheseshows]

Are there any couples (bl or just celebrities in general) that you think might actually be together in real life? Let’s speculate ❤️ its all in good fun (if you don’t like speculating... just ignore this please 😂)

I love speculating, but let me put out a disclaimer: It’s all fine and dandy to ship “real people” so as long as one is being respectful about it. One thing I will never do is speculate this with the people in question. My thing is, nothing is impossible. No one could look me in the eyes and say they can’t be together, it’s just impossible. Well, I’d have to ask why is it impossible? 

Why is so out of the ordinary that perhaps Mew and Gulf could be together for real? Sometimes, people argue why is it always about romance? Why can’t we leave it alone and call it a really good friendship? Well, that’s up to the viewer. How do they define platonic and romantic? For example, to me there are a few things Mew and Gulf have done that exceed a friendship level...

Still I teeter the fence when it comes to “real life” shipping. Unfortunately, Thailand (Thai BL) MARKETS the shit out of it. It’s a job, first and foremost for those boys. It’s the way they make money and their sexual orientation has nothing to do with that. They are simply in it for the money whether straight, gay, bi, lesbian etc. Whether they choose to identify that is also up to the actor/actress. Never should us fans be nagging and forcing anyone to ‘come out.’ Fans should also be respectful of any partners the actors/actresses have outside of the marketed ship. I know that there was a debacle with fans over partners that TayNew (another Thai BL ship) had. It sent fans into a frenzy because Tay and New belong together...but how do you know?

It’s not up to us to POLICE these young men or women we watch in these BL shows. It actually gets even harder to truly “ship” anyone outside of BL, because industries run differently. For instance, I might be a sort of ...let’s say “peeper” when it comes to Cockles, which is that of Jensen Ackles and Misha Collins. But for me that kinda goes both ways. Cockles is simply a name for them together and their bond had become something hella special over the years they worked on Supernatural together. Could I speculate that Ackles and Collins would cross the line of platonic more so than j2, which is Jared Padalecki and Ackles...yes, I do think Cockles could delve into romance. 

It’s tricky with real life shipping, because most people want their privacy. However, I won’t shame anyone for thinking that any of the boys from BL shows are together, especially Thai BL, because they totally make that for you. I don’t think every Thai BL ship is together, but I won’t rule it out. For example, if there was announcement that Mew and Gulf actually got married it’d be of zilch surprise to me. Or if any of them announced from OffGun to TayNew, ZaintSee, BrightWin...seriously, it wouldn’t surprise me. It’s also because ever since I started watching these shows I do not and have ever held the view that they are straight actors. Maybe some of them are, maybe some of them aren’t, and some of them fell into a pit of discovery (Bright) as they worked on their shows. 

It also becomes hella tricky for Thailand because as far as I know same sex marriage hasn’t been legalized. So imagine being any of those boys and actually developing feelings *coughs* Mew Suppasit, but you can’t get married in your own country? However, you can get “married” for marketing the ship and sort of like an interview process to describe your dream wedding, etc... it’s like the teen magazines with the excerpts on your fav celeb, but live action interviews that pawn off a brand or pretend to marry...I watched that video thinking this is Tharn and Type’s future, mainly because I hadn’t found the original. I found a fan version with music and shit, but someone led me to an upload of the original and said it’s MewGulf. I went what?  No, what? OKay....I hate watching this wedding video because it is WHIPLASH. 

Anyway, anon, before this gets any longer, I’ll stop here. It’s safe to say that if there is one BL couple that could ever be legit it’d be MewGulf for me. However, there could be a possibility that Mew and Gulf’s age differences start to clash. Gulf is a mature 23 year old yes, but Mew turned 29...he’s creeping into wanting to settle down territory. They may want different things, but who the hell knows.

That’s the rub, WE NEVER REALLY KNOW and WILL NEVER KNOW unless somehow we get to live Zee Pruk’s fanboy dream and become friends with your celeb crush then be in a show with him and have smexy scenes. Then continue to have a RAGING crush on that said person (Saint) and love that fact that he totally teases the shit out of you about it....more than friends? 

WHO KNOWS. What I do try to stick to is the characters. Tharn and Type together forever. Fighter and Tutor together forever. Sometimes though I have seen the actors do something together at a fan meet and I go, wait a minute I want to see Tharn and Type do that so let me write up a fic for them. So it’s funny, because the “real life” ship supplies me material for the fictional ship.  

Okay, it got longer. If you made it through this anon. Yay! 

[unpopular-bishop]

protective team and injury

Win is very tired. He’s been very tired for about four days now, which is how many nights its been since he and Team got into that stupid argument. They’ve since made up, but Team hasn’t been coming to his room and Win knows that it takes time, that Team got spooked and is just working the nerve up to start coming to him again. He knows that. He knows that.

Still, Win is very tired. He can’t sleep now, knowing that Team is probably sleeping as badly as he is, if not worse, and is just - staying in his room, probably staring at the ceiling, which is his floor, so it’s almost like Team is staring up at him, just daring him to rush him in this. Win won’t rush him; Win’s working on his part of this relationship the same as Team is and he’s trying not to be pushy or demand more than Team is able to give. That means that he needs to give Team space and time. He can’t just demand Team come back and be comfortable in bed with him. It wasn’t a knockdown, drag-out fight but it was definitely their most serious argument and it hadn’t lasted more than a night, but it was enough to shake them both, just a little. Team will come back to bed soon; he’s already sitting next to Win at lunch again. Yesterday, they held hands under the table. At the beginning of practice today, Team kissed him outside the locker room while the rest of the team was getting changed. Win just has to be patient and in the next few nights, he’s sure his boy will be back in bed and they can both get a good night’s sleep without a worry.

But that’s in a few nights. Right now, Win is very tired.

Very tired and not willing to put up much of a fight when he gets cornered after practice by four nongs who are supposed to be cleaning up the pool and locker room this week.

“Please, Phi?” Book drops dramatically to his knees while Key and Mew clasp their hands together and shake them wildly, “We’re so behind on class and there’s a project due tomorrow!”

“Why didn’t you finish your project earlier?” Win can’t help but ask, smile tugging at his lips despite the drag of exhaustion behind his eyelids. He’d wanted to go home and take a nap, maybe hold Team’s hand and conveniently forget to let go until they were already in front of Win’s door and it would only make sense for Team to come in with him and maybe nap too.

“We didn’t realize we’d need to spend so much time in the library,” Dew pokes at the squeegee broom he’s leaning against, looking put out and stressed, “I’m sorry, Phi. It’s really rude of us to ask so suddenly. You probably have other stuff you need to do that isn’t covering for your idiot nongs.”

“You aren’t idiots.” Win pats Dew’s shoulder firmly, trying to come off as a reassuring vice president and not an exhausted senior. He regrets not ducking out as soon as practice ended like Dean had. Where was Pruk when Win needed him? Probably off with Manaow and Del, the traitor. Win glances around and doesn’t see Team, which does not make his heart sink just a little, not even a bit.

“Well…” he starts to say slowly, reluctantly, “It wouldn’t do for you guys to get a bad grade, especially so close to meet season. We need everyone on top of their grades and their game. This can’t happen again, okay?”

“Yes, Phi.” All four of them chorus at once and it makes Win laugh despite the little jabs of annoyance in his stomach.

“I guess I can do -” he gives in, already reaching for the squeegee broom - and then there’s a loud crash from inside the locker room and a familiar squawk of pain and surprise.

Win doesn’t actually remember moving or even recognizing the voice that had just yelped like an angry bird. It’s more that...one moment he’s standing by the poolside, talking to his nongs, and the next he is inside the locker room and taking in the site of Team clutching his leg close while he sits on the locker room floor in a pile of cleaning supplies.

“Team!” He kneels at Team’s side, hands hovering awkwardly over Team’s skin and then busying themselves with shoving aside the buckets and mop handle still laying on top of Team, “Are you okay? What happened!?”

Team doesn’t answer for a few seconds, just curled over his leg with his head bowed too low for Win to see his face, but when he finally looks up, it feels like Win’s brain has shortcircuited.

Team has tears in his eyes.

“I just tripped.” Team sniffles, slowly rubbing circles into his knee. He’s wearing his street clothes already, sweats and one of Win’s shirts, though he’d never admit that he picked it up from Win’s floor one day and just refused to give it back. His back is damp from the floor, still wet from after practice, and Win feels it when he carefully rubs a comforting hand along Team’s spine.

“What happened to your leg? Did you sprain your ankle? Pull a muscle?”

“I dunno,” Team wipes his face quickly as more footsteps echo from the hall. Win had forgotten his nongs were still there. “It just - hurts. I think I hit it when I fell down.”

“We need to take you to health services.”

“I think so too.”

“I’m taking you to health services. You could have really hurt yourself.” Win narrows his eyes at Team, and then has to stop and process because he was fully expecting Team to argue with him, not agree.

“P’Team?” Key says from the doorway, sounding worried, “What happened? Is everything okay?”

“It’s fine,” Team says at the same time that Win says, “Team fell. I’m taking him to health services.”

“Hia,” Team starts to complain but Win doesn’t give him the chance, just stands up and pulls him up, too.

“You guys can just clean up around the pool and then make sure the floor in here is dry today,” Win says to the four other team members in between forcibly pushing at Team until he acquiescence to letting Win piggyback him. “And make sure these supplies are put away. Come back tomorrow after class but before practice and finish cleaning up.”

“Yes, phi.” Book says and Win would take a few seconds to apologize for leaving them after just promising to clean up but Team needs him now and is a heavy, solid weight on his back. It’s the closest they’ve been in four days and it is already driving Win crazy.

Team doesn’t struggle too much, just slings both of their bags over his shoulders so Win has more free movement with his arms and Win is out of the locker room and then the gym and then the main street in a matter of minutes.

It isn’t until they’re well away from the pool and the club that Team finally taps at Win’s shoulder and huffs into his ear, breath warm and gentle where he’s so close.

“You can put me down now.”

“I don’t think I will.” Win decides as he continues down the sidewalk. It’s late enough in the day that most people are either already left campus or found their camping spots for the next few hours.

“Hia, I’m really okay.”

“I’ll put you down when there’s a doctor to look at your leg.”

Win feels Team press his face to the skin of his shoulder exposed by his tank, more warm breath and warmer lips as Team brushes against him. “Hia, I didn’t hurt my leg. I don’t need a doctor. Can we just go home?”

Win stops, processing that with a brain that doesn’t really want to process anything right now. “You didn’t hurt your leg? Then what happened back there?”

“Can you put me down first?”

“No.”

“Hia!”

Win tightens his arms around Team’s legs, bracing for a struggle, but Team just sighs explosively and shifts his weight to force Win into turning toward the parking lot where his bike is parked. Win staggers but gets his feet under him again and reluctantly turns away from health services in exchange for parking.

“Happy? Now explain.”

Team doesn’t explain. Win has long given into the fact that Team will never speak when he doesn’t want to, that Team’s preferred method of torture is the silent treatment and that Team’s go-to response when he’s unsure is the same thing. It can make figuring out if Team is upset with him or just processing a little harder than Win is used to working to make sense of people, but Team has always been worth the extra work.

He’s confused and now he’s curious, but he lets Team have his time. He’s been so stressed the last few days, so tired, and guilty for his part in the argument even after apologizing. He’s missed Team. Now he has Team, a warm weight on his back with his arms draped over Win’s shoulders and his thighs strong and firm under Win’s hands. When Team’s forehead thunks against the back of his neck, Win has to breathe in slowly and tilt his head back so he’s resting it on Team’s. Just for a few seconds. Just for a few seconds.

They’re both quiet. The campus is nearly empty, the weather is nice, the air smells fresh. Win has a beautiful boy in his arms and is heading home with him. He feels relaxed for the first time in days, even with the confusion.

They still have a few minutes before they reach the parking lot when Team finally speaks up. When he does, it’s muffled against Win’s skin.

“You’re too nice, hia. People take advantage of you.”

Win smiles, looking straight ahead even though all he wants to do is figure out how to keep holding Team like this while also staring at him.

“I’m not too nice.”

“You are.” Team asserts, “You were gonna stay and clean up everything on your own, weren’t you? Even though it was their turn and you’re supposed to have a partner, anyway.”

“It’s my job as a responsible phi -”

“Too nice.” Team interrupts and tugs at his hair to make a point, “You’re getting taken advantage of. Why do you think they asked you and not anyone else, huh?”

Win doesn’t have an answer for that.

“So what happened with your leg?” he decides to change the subject but Team just sighs again, like Win’s being excessively thick about things.

“I really did fall.” Team admits, “But I didn’t actually get hurt. I just wanted you to take me home.”

“You could have just asked!” Win can’t help but ask, “I would have!”

“You would have felt bad for Mew and the others.” Team shrugs, “It was a risk I couldn’t take, hia.”

Win nearly drops him he’s laughing soo hard. He finally has to relinquish his hold so he can bend over, hands on his knees. It shouldn’t be this funny, but the delivery of the line was so serious and straightforward like Team really meant it, despite the ridiculousness of it. He’s so stupidly fond of this kid.

Team stands with his arms crossed, not quite pouting but looking close to it, brows crumpled above his eyes in annoyance. “Stop laughing, hia, I’m serious.”

That just sends Win off again, but he manages to chortle standing up this time and doesn’t hesitate to grab Team’s hand and squeeze it as he starts to walk.

“Thank you for saving me, then, Team.” he says and hopes Team can hear the sincerity. It’s really, really funny, but he can see that Team just faked an injury to get him out of cleaning the locker room for what it is, and he appreciates it. In ten years, he wants to tell the story to their kids.

Team just huffs, but he holds Win’s hand back. In fact, he tangles their fingers together and steps closer.

In the end, Win doesn’t even need to pretend to forget to let go of his hand. Team follows him to his room without complaint and they take a nap.

[fireandspiceland]

@woahokay-jay is communicating through tags with me but I can't keep it there so here's some thoughts

#end game pruk end game vb????#AGHHH THOUGHTS. #allen's probably sucking him off to prove he's the best at it from them three and yknow what#he's right#its funny tho allens probably the one sucking them off the most#but like... just as friends <3#platonic dick sucking#theres some more ACTUAL ROMANTIC tension between arthur and gil i reckon#all of them are too dumb to see it until allen starts spending more time with alfred#so arthur and gil end up spending more time together

YES IT JUST MAKES SENSE LIKE THAT?? Arthur and Allen already being fwbs before they meet Gil and it's all platonic between them but of course someone has to develope a crush and make it more complicated *cough* Allen *cough* but it all works out when Allen idk.. needs tutoring or sth and starts hanging out with Alfred and suddenly his little crush on Arthur is forgotten because now he has a HUGE crush on Alfred. who is probably already in love with Allen long before they start hanging out.

And just to mention it for good measure yes of course Allen is the king of sucking his friends off BUT this brings me to sth that has been on my mind for a while! I mentioned here that Gil transfers to their school for unknown reasons but I have a reason for him now. Initially I wanted to make Arthur trans (like in my bible camp au) but what if Gil is trans and thats part of the reason why he transferred schools? getting a have a new start and stuff.

#ALSO MAYBE??? FRANCIS X ANTONIO IN THE BACKGROUND TOO???#AHHHH WAIT THIS AU IS STARTING TO PIECE TOGETHER

YES Ive been thinking about them as well!! either as some kinda pretentious senior year kids or maybe as their teachers. I just really want to see Antonio as the kinda lazy but overly motivated PE teacher that Alfred has to deal with

This ship lives in my head rent free so can we talk about Arthur Gil and Allen hanging out in the basement together smoking jamming and talking shit and they end up with Allen sucking Arthur’s dick while Gil takes a drag from the blunt they’ve passed around and shotguns Arthur? Pls??

[izuku-memedoriya]

Super Shenanigans

This is my gift for @chasingbutterfliesintoeternity for the @prukevents secret santa exchange. I’m so sorry it’s late! I went with the superhero and supervillain prompt, and I hope this is what you’re looking for in it. I hope your holidays were nice too, and I wish you a good 2017. Here’s the long awaited gift.

Word Count: 2536

Characters: Crimson Ink (Prussia/Gilbert), The Emerald Pirate (England/Arthur)

Rating: T

Pairing: PrUk

Tw: Violence

A magician never reveals his secrets.

“You must wonder why I brought you here today,” the man before him said as he poured a cup of wine. “Care for a glass?” He was already reaching for another while he spoke.

The vast room around himself was wide and open, the floors as slick as glass, yet a hazy marble tiled the base of the room. The walls were dark, yet elegant, while tall, large curtains stood proudly by the windows, the cool breeze brushing the fabric aside, causing it to dance before the city below. There was a modern feel to it all, yet some strange objects laid about on counters and end tables, items that belonged in the past, yet laid on the surfaces of the room as though they have remained there for centuries. This was oddly not the spoken man’s regular “lair” as people would call it. This was someplace else, somewhere special.

The Emerald Pirate. That’s what they called him, the man that stood confidently at the table, both glasses of wine long since poured, the surface set up with food, dressed as though it would be served to a king.

The man was a highly dangerous supervillain that had arose to power nearly a year ago. The key word: was. He was dressed in attire perfectly suited for the captain of a ship, the most respected man on board. Clad in leather boots, a white blouse, and a cravat dressed at the collar of his shirt, flowing outwards, he held himself as a man of the seas. It was a true signature look to him, the person beneath his evil persona hidden under a large pirate hat with feathers that flowed outwards, almost reaching the shoulder of his red coat adorned with gold trimmings. An eyepatch covered a single eye, the other shining a bright emerald while a small tuft of blond hair protruded from his headwear. It was a unique look indeed.

“What do you want this time? I’ve got real enemies to defeat, you know? The city needs to be saved from actual supervillains. I don’t need your grimy friends capturing me. I should have known it’d be you. Besides, I had plans for tonight, can’t you hold this off until after New Year’s evening?” The Pirate’s rival spoke up, Crimson Ink, having been just captured by the supervillain. Was the supervillain’s newest evil plan eating dinner in front of him without offering him any? How scandalous.

Momentarily, The Pirate was struck, looking insulted by the mere mentioning of being a terrible villain, but strangely enough, he appeared to brush it off as though he had heard nothing about it. “Ah, yes, my companions of the undead. They are quite handy, really, I could make them do the job for me all the time, but then this would be no fun, would it? Don’t tell me you don’t want to have any fun with me tonight?”

“I didn’t know you could summon the undead. Why don’t you, you know, get them to take over the world instead of terrorizing people downtown. Couldn’t you have waited until new years was over before being an annoyance again?” He asked, his mind wandering to where he was supposed to be in his regular life as Gilbert Beilschmidt, ready to watch fireworks with his brother as they counted down to New Years.

“Dear me, you don’t think they should at least be a little more festive while destroying the earth as we know it?”

“But they’re not destroying the world, they’re just scaring people downtown. I don’t even think they hurt anyone! What’s with that?! What’s with you?! Can’t you just summon a meteor and destroy everything?”

“Always so defiant, are we?” A heavy snort erupted from The Pirate, shooting the hero a slight glare. “Like I’d do something as ludicrous as that. I’m one of the sods that live on this planet. Besides, that’s not how magic works.”

“Come on, Pirate-” The superhero was quickly cut off.

“It’s actually The Emerald Pirate, please say it as such.”

“Emerald Pirate.”

“You forgot The, but go on.”

“Listen, I can’t take any of this seriously if you keep doing shit like this. I mean, come on, look at what you’ve done lately! You conjured a pirate ship on a sacred landmark. You didn’t harm anyone, but you sure as hell pissed off a lot of people. You damaged a building by pouring rain over it for twenty days straight, everything was ruined by the water. The evilest thing you’ve done lately is steal every single pet in town, and when I found you, you were snuggling with at least ten rabbits! And don’t forget about the army of rats you unleashed in the city, and that’s not counting the time you set ghosts loose on a different day! It’s all about as harmless as your zombie goons! Everything you do makes no sense!”

Was the villain just planning something so sinister that he was making Gilbert lose his guard first before following through with his plan?

Every time the supervillain pulled such peculiar evils, Gilbert had ended up being roped into them, somehow finding that The Emerald Pirate had been behind it all along. Each evil becoming more and more ludicrous as time passed. He was surprised to find that The Pirate had been the mastermind behind it all every time, managing to find new and innovative ways to catch him by surprise, to be the mastermind behind all of these simple, anticlimactic evils.

“How can you do all of this anyways? How does your magic work?”

“Ah, a magician never reveals his secrets. Besides, why would I ever tell you?”

Gilbert nearly rolled his eyes to the back of his head. “I should have expected that. An awesome hero like me can’t just sit here and do nothing with you! I have more villains to worry about than some guy pretending to be one, you’ve hardly done anything that’s actually evil lately.”

“And what’s with your outfit anyways,” Gilbert continued “I mean, a pirate suit, what’s with that? Go back to the seventeen-hundreds, Blackbeard.”

The Pirate rested a hand on his chest, gasping a mock surprise, insulted by what he said. “Really? You criticize me for my attire, while you look like you’re dressed for an MCR concert? I’ve never heard of a superhero who dresses like some punk.”

“Hey, my outfit is cool, you look like some guy dressed for a con!”

As strange as The Emerald Pirate’s outfit was, Gilbert’s was able to rival just as equally with the peculiar looks. Chains strapped around leather pants, a tank top with a sleeveless leather jacket, exposed skin covered in tattoos, intricately designed all along his skin, covering a majority of his body. The ink was mainly a crimson color, matching the color of the superhero’s eyes, his features hidden beneath a mask created from the ink, solidified and covering his face, his white hair sticking out from the back, styled in a different fashion than his everyday hair was. It was where he got his superhero name, Crimson Ink.

“That’s it, is it a fight you’re looking for?!” Gilbert exclaimed. “Well, fine, I’ll take you out once and for all. You’ll finally stop terrorizing the city with rats, bees, or whatever dumb idea you come up with next.”

“Tell me, my good rival, are you paying for my dinner when you take me out?” He smirked. “Those are quite the threats coming from a supposed superhero.”

Gilbert flushed from under his mask, becoming flustered from the first statement. “You know that’s not what I meant!”

“Very well. Try and defeat me, but you never will.”

He could never understand it. Why the supervillain that stood before him only did evil things that were more of an annoyance than anything else. He possessed the ability of mystiokinesis, a power that was beyond human understanding, the ability to manipulate magic itself, yet the supervillain had not tried to cause chaos in the world, only evils that were mundane compared to others that could be catastrophic. They had been rivals before, The Emerald Pirate being one of his harder foes to defeat, the oddly dressed man seemingly having a motive before, holding power and a prideful posture, ready to defeat Gilbert with the single use of a spell. Yet now, it was as though he was just playing games.

On the other hand, Gilbert possessed melanokinesis, able to control ink with a simple flick of the finger, and harness its own elements into his fighting tactics. It was handy, versatile, and he was able to rival the magician, countering some of the spells he cast, using quick thinking and his knowledge about his own power. When it came to his life, and other lives on the line, Gibert was a good fighter, his mind able to work under such stressful situations while he seemed somewhat more airy in his regular daily life.

An elegant step was taken forward, a sword conjuring in the pirate’s hand, shards of green dust forming together to create the slick blade, a practical replica of a weapon from the past. Where it had come from, and how it was made, was unknown.

What’s with this guy anyways, is he some kind of history nut?

The pirate cut in. “What? Your sharp tongue has nothing to say anymore? I enjoy it so when you lecture me about what’s right and wrong.”

Holding out his hand, Gilbert summoned the ink from his skin, the liquid molding and shaping to his very will, sharpened to the tip, creating a sword of his own. Tonight appeared to be a traditional battle.

He lunged forward, and The Pirate lunged at him return, sword at the ready, the both of them not backing down from the fight, determined to win once and for all. However, that was what Gilbert thought.

Instead, their swords clashed together, but the sound of steel connecting had been drowned by the noise of a firework exploding high in the sky, reverberating in the building they stood in. Suddenly, before Gilbert could react, the setting appeared to change before him, by the use of The Emerald Pirate’s magic, no doubt.

They were still in the room that Gilbert had been escorted to by the supervillain's undead henchmen, yet stars hung above them in the sky, almost like an illusion had been cast. His feet remained planted on the marble flooring below, while the sky stretch high above, and in the distance he could see the city, the clock counting down on a large building, a colorful array of lights flashing on the structures, dancing with the stars in the sky.

“It’s New Year’s, Crimson, why don’t we have a little fun?” A smirk formed on his lips, a single Emerald eye shining brightly with confidence and arrogance, yet melded with something else Gilbert could not explain, perhaps a gentle look of sorts. “How about a dance?”

“Fine, but I’m not holding back.”

“Nor am I.”

Their swords clashed once more, the blades creating a beat each time they connected, the metal clashing eventually turning into a rhythm, a song being made from the fighting. Slowly, the music halted, and no longer were the rivals fighting, but dancing as fireworks continued the rhythm they had created, the music unneeded as the same song played in their minds. Clumsy feet moving in quick, jagged steps were now slow and fluid, working together as one. The Pirate’s sword had disintegrated in a green mist, the blade being replaced with Gilbert’s hands in his own, guiding the other in their dance.

Gilbert’s weapon had disappeared along with The Pirate’s, the ink returning to his skin where it naturally belonged. He could hear people shouting from somewhere in the background, another spell that must have been casted, counting down as the end of the year neared to a few seconds, excited as a new one began. New hopes, new dreams, a new start for people, to hope for a better time, forgetting about the last year.

The Pirate loomed over Crimson, dipping him downwards as the chanting became background noise. He found himself leaning upwards while the other man leaned down, his hand lightly taking the villain's cheek before their lips connected. The feathers from The Pirate’s hat fell beside them, nearly tickling Gilbert’s cheek, obscuring the vision of their kiss by any non-existant onlookers. He tilted the superhero's mask upwards, doing so in order to properly press his lips against him, but respectfully keeping his features hidden.

Gilbert heard the sound of people shouting “Zero!” all at once, as clearly as day, excitedly cheering as the New Year finally began.

“You’re quite the oblivious one, aren’t you? I can’t believe my sights were on you of all people.” The Pirate suddenly cut in over all of the cheering, pulling back slightly, their lips still nearly touching.

“What?”

“I don’t want to take over the world, I want you, Crimson Ink. Why do you think I set up the table and poured us some wine?” The pirate admitted.

“That’s bullshit.”

A chuckle escaped the blond. “Alright, perhaps I would like to take over the world. As I would much love to hold it in my hands, I would rather be holding you right now.”

Gilbert flushed awkwardly at the statement. He would admit, some of the times he was still excited to see The Pirate, even when he was claiming most of it to be annoying in recent days. It felt like a nuisance, but the attention-seeking pirate had always been successful in luring the superhero to him. He must have been showing up to the ridiculous evils for a reason, other than to stop him, like any hero would.

“I was merely trying to get your attention. I thought I wanted to you to be my rival, and my rival alone, but then I discovered that wasn’t the case. I only wanted to see you and that determination of your’s. I’ve discovered that I’ve grown quite fond of you. Now that I finally have your attention, I’ll tell you something about myself, although, you will hardly hear a magician utter one of their secrets to another.”

It was true, the villain liked how defiant and determined Crimson Ink was to win, he enjoyed seeing that spark in his eyes, never giving up, even when he felt that he may not win. He could respect everything about the superhero, yet he could hardly explain the reasoning for wanting the other’s attention to himself, and sometimes he felt as though he was on the wrong side of it all, but he knew that he could never truly change.

“Just tell me what it is.” Gilbert disrupted The Pirate’s thoughts.

“My name is Arthur.”

“And why would you think telling me who you are is a good idea?”

“Oh, you’ll never find me, not unless you want me, my dear Gilbert.”

“How do you know my nam-!” A finger was placed over Gilbert’s lips, but before Arthur could comment, the invasive hand had been promptly removed by the albino.

“Yeah, yeah, a magician, got it.”

[damnprussia]

Star Wars: A PrUK Story

@aph-memepan, I’m your secret santa for @prukevents & the PrUK Secret Santa! I won’t lie, I struggled a lot with your prompts, I have no idea why. I’m writing this, powering through a week-old headache and I realise that it just can’t wait.

You asked for superpower AU and that’s not my specialty at all; I’ve been hit with the Star Wars bug (okay that’s a lie, I’m always hit with the Star Wars bug) and this Jedi AU has been calling my name. I have no idea if you like the Wars, so I’ve tried to keep this as vague as possible while still keeping with the idea of ‘superpowers’. Force sensitivities = super powers basically, right?

Rated SFW, mentions of sex, and some psychological manipulation.

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away . . . .

                                                 STAR WARS

                                                   Episode LXIX

                                        SOME GAY SHIT HAPPENS

It is a period of war between the Jedi Order and the evil Sith Empire as the two armies fight for control of the galaxy. As the Sith spread across the galaxy, their numbers grow with mandatory conscription of those sensitive to the Force on planets they control.

One Jedi Knight, Gilbert Beilschmidt, has fled the Jedi Order and is presumed dead. He is residing in the planet Nebulan, hiding his connection to the Force as the Sith Empire overtake the planet. 

His former Apprentice, Arthur Kirkland, betrayed the Jedi Order and has risen the ranks of the Sith. He takes residence on Nebulan, taking command of its jurisdiction. A ripple in the Force alerts him to a familiar presence that is not far away...

“Last call, we’re closing soon - last call.”

A bar on Nebulan was surprisingly busy for an average night, but that wasn’t so bad. The patrons were rowdy as usual, with young men and women chatting each other at the bar, engaging in fights, and probably making illegal trade deals in the corners, or whatnot. At least nobody’s limbs had been amputated.

The bar hadn’t been full like this since the Sith Empire - a powerful legion of Force users who used their powers to gain power over others.

From a business standpoint, Sith occupation of Nebulan was a good thing. Young Sith apprentices and loyalists enjoyed their drink, and as much as they enjoyed reaching out to take control of everything they could, it seemed that they enjoyed losing control just as much. They didn’t tip too well, but they made up for it in third and fourth rounds.

From a business owner’s standpoint, Sith occupation was a headache that no medicine or droid lullaby could send away. They were rowdy, loud, demanding, and awfully rude to the locals who might just be trying to escape their troubles.

Somehow, though, peace and calm reigned in the bar. There was always order, and usually calm. Disputes were taken outside and matters settled promptly. It may have had to do with the certain business owner and bartender who appeared to rule with an iron fist. There was something innate about his ability to set things at a calm.

Gilbert Beilschmidt had come to Nebulan mysteriously, set up his business seemingly overnight, and that had been that. Those that inquired about his past, where he came from, who he was, were met with vague, dodgy answers, and since he was good at what he did - that is, getting the patrons drunk and making sure nobody died in the process - questions soon died away. Gilbert was integrated into the community as quickly as he could pour his drinks.

With fifteen minutes left of an otherwise smooth night, two young Sith were harassing a lady at the bar. They were both young, obviously apprentices, wearing black. For the moment, the bartender (and other patrons) ignored them, not wanting confrontation. However, the moment they both put their hands on her, both of their nearly-full drinks shattered, alcohol spilling all over them. Somehow, not a drop reached the lady, who quickly ducked out of their domineering after they both stood up in anger.

“Who did that?” they were shouting, looking around wildly to find the source of the mischief. Just as they started accusing other patrons of being the cause, Gilbert approached, standing before them. “Alright,” he said simply. “Out, both of you.”

They looked affronted. “You don’t tell us what to do-”

“OUT.” Something in his tone, and the sharpness in his red eyes quieted them both, and all other patrons around them. For several moments, they stared at each other, before slowly, the willpower of the younger patrons wilted and they slowly retreated, mumbling under their breaths.

Within the hour, the rest of the patrons were gone, quick to leave after the other Sith argued about “returning for revenge”. Gilbert was not intimidated by their words.

His only other assistants were two droids who cleaned, passed drinks to passengers, and assisted in security detail. He liked them, because they were resistant to the powers of the Dark Side that the Sith possessed. They fettered around the establishment, sweeping and mopping after their unruly patrons.

Gilbert was cleaning his second-to-last tankard behind the bar, when a shadow from the corner of the building began to move, and come towards him.

“I announced last call an hour ago,” Gilbert said to the dark form, hardly looking up.

It was a man clad in black, just as the other Sith had been. He came to the bar, silently, deliberately, and sat down on the closest stool, off to the far right corner. Gilbert did not seemed perturbed by his presence, even as the other leaned in. “How long have you known I was here?” He took the edges of his hood and slid it back to reveal a pale face with sharp features, and illustrious green eyes and blonde hair.

Only then did Gilbert look up and face him. He took a deep breath, staring at the face of Arthur Kirkland, his former apprentice, back a long time ago, in a different time, when he was a different man. When he was a Jedi - when Arthur was a Jedi.

Damn. Arthur looked magnificent. Confident, powerful, intelligent.

As they stared at each other, assessing one another, Gilbert was reminded of the first time he had laid eyes on the man, nearly ten years ago. Far away, in the Jedi temple of Coruscant, illustrated in a convenient flashback sequence:

“You’ll be given an apprentice,” he had been told by the Jedi council. “One who is not a child, and not our typical recruit.”

Gilbert knew then that he should have said ‘no’. Whenever the Jedi council deviated from the norm, it meant it was convenient for them, and inconvenient for everyone else. But Gilbert was in no position to reject the Council’s decision to assign this unorthodox Apprentice on him.

“What makes him special?” Gilbert had asked.

There was nervousness throughout the council. Eight powerful Jedi, looking at each other in disdain. Never a good sign. “He has the potential to be a powerful Force user. Incredibly sensitive, with Force precognition and emotional manipulation. He is an adult, from the far corner of the galaxy.”

Gilbert’s eyes narrowed. “So?” There was more to this...

“We have acquired him based on the facts that he has an affinity for the Dark Side. Sith Masters were closing in on him, and from what we have seen of him, he was not entirely unwilling to join.”

Yes, there it was. There was the one thing he was waiting for. “An affinity for the Dark Side”. Just like him. That’s what they saw in Gilbert - due to his own “affinity for the Dark Side”. “So you want me to sway him from that?”

“You have been able to resist the temptation of the Dark Side unusually well, even when you were near completion to your apprenticeship under the Sith, Gilbert. You are the only one who can turn him away and form him into a model Jedi. You must do anything in your power to keep him from turning to the Dark Side.”

Gilbert hadn’t told them what they already knew - that he was hardly a ‘model Jedi’ himself, and his “resisting the Dark Side” was sometimes interrupted with flirting and secret affairs with it.

And when he saw him for the first time - fierce green eyes, a stern expression, an anxious composure, Gilbert had done his best to be stern and diplomatic.

“I will be your master,” he had said. “You are my apprentice. I will teach you the ways of the Force.” He saw Arthur’s eyes light up in eager anticipation, and Gilbert swallowed hard.

“You will learn the Light Side of the Force.” When he saw that enthusiasm falter - just a little bit, just enough for someone with keen vision to notice - was when Gilbert knew that he had a long, and difficult road ahead of him.

Transformed from the fierce, anxious young man who had greeted him ten years ago, into the confident, relaxed demeanour of a Sith Lord who sat at Gilbert’s bar (spoiler: Gilbert’s attempt to ‘reform’ Arthur had, in fact, been an abysmal failure to be explored later), watching him calmly, calculating his next moves. “How long have you known I was here?” he asked.

“Since you walked in,” Gilbert replied. After a moment of hesitation, he began to pour the man a drink. “You reek.”

Arthur seemed to revel in it. “My last reports indicated that Gilbert Beilschmidt, Jedi Master, was declared dead in battle.” He accepted the drink with a nod of thanks as Gilbert slid him a glass. “It is awfully bold of you to place yourself here, in the midst of Sith territory, and it takes an enormous amount of power to hide it all for as long as you have been.”

“It was not Sith territory when I came here,” Gilbert replied with a deep frown, now busying himself with checking his bar stock of drinks. “The reports stated I was dead, but I know the Force has told you differently.”

Arthur paused, taking a drink but keeping his eyes on his ‘host’. “So you let us invade without lifting a finger to stop it.” He put the drink down with a heavy thud. “Was I the reason you left?”

Gilbert’s hands stilled on a bottle of syrup, his back turned to the other man. “...No,” he responded at last, but it did not have a certain level of conviction to it. “After being routinely passed over for missions, promotions, and clearances, it became clear to me that the Council had no faith in me, and so I lost my faith in them. So I left.” He shrugged.

There was silence for a long time as Arthur drank and Gilbert cleaned, the only sound from the quiet commands from Gilbert to his droids. “And now you’re a bartender,” Arthur finally said.

The other walked over and put both hands on the bar in front of him, eyeing Arthur down. “And you’re a Sith Lord with a high enough body count to make me blush,” he replied in an unimpressed tone. “Funny, how times change.”

“You seem hardly impressed with how far I’ve come,” Arthur drawled. “Are you disappointed in what happened?”

What happened was something that would haunt Gilbert for years. Well - not necessarily haunt, because Gilbert himself did not seem to mind what happened, but everyone else did.

He had let Arthur go.

“You must do anything in your power,” he had been told. Gilbert had taken those instructions very liberally. Arthur had been fascinated by Gilbert, in all the wrong places. Fascinated with his past, his Sith origins. Fascinated with his red lightsaber. Fascinated with Gilbert’s ability to walk that line between Light and Dark, never quite falling to one side or another. Fascinated with Gilbert’s interpretation of the Jedi Code, and how Gilbert used those interpretations to manipulate it. Fascinated with him.

Gilbert, in turn, had become fascinated with Arthur, in all the wrong places. Fascinated with his past, with his decidedly not-Sith origins. Fascinated with Arthur’s fascination with his red lightsaber. Fascinated with his ability to some close, so close to the Dark Side, but never quite fall into temptation.

“You’re the only thing keeping me on this path,” Arthur had said to him once, and that was when Gilbert realised that this was a failed endeavour. But they tried, oh did they try. They tried lots of different things. Meditation, training, battles, mind games, coaching - oh, and sex. They tried a lot of sex. And, of all those things, the sex was arguably the most effective.

So Gilbert, simply tired of fighting a steadily losing battle with a Jedi who slipped further and further away from him, let him go. It was only a year after his graduation from Padawan to Jedi Knight did Gilbert formally (well, as formally as could be done in the early morning after a very emotionally-charged night) relinquished Arthur of his duties as a Jedi, and sent him on his way.

“Am I disappointed?” Gilbert reiterated, contemplating. “No,” he finally said. “Are you happy, where you are?”

Slowly, Arthur laughed. “One isn’t necessarily happy in the ranks of the Sith. But, in that sense, yes.” He finished his drink and the glass shifted forward towards Gilbert, who resisted the urge to roll his eyes as he took it and began to pour another. “Interesting how times change, indeed. You were a Sith, who became a Jedi, who became a civilian. I was a civilian, who became a Jedi, who became a Sith.”

“I got tired,” Gilbert explained as he poured the glass. “Tired of the looks from others, and tired of only seeing you on a battlefield on the opposite lines. And tired of…” he hesitated with the last words. “Tired of feeling my connection with you, through the Force, knowing there was an incomprehensible amount of distance between us that could never be shrunk. So, I left. So I would stop being bothered by it, and I could busy myself with other things, and drown it away.”

Arthur accepted his glass back when he opened his hand and it slid into his palm. “Drown it away?”

It was Gilbert’s turn to pour himself a drink. Straight liquor. “I still love you,” he replied blankly, quickly replacing the words on his tongue with the alcohol.

“That surprises me,” Arthur said, a genuine look on his face to match his words. “So much time has passed.”

The man simply shrugged, already half his drink gone. “Oh well, it is what it is.”

Arthur did not indicate one way or another his own feelings, and Gilbert did not expect him to. Part of him didn’t expect Arthur to necessarily even care about what Gilbert felt. Instead, Arthur sat in relative silence, finishing his drink while Gilbert finished his own, finished his chores at the bar, and powered down the droids.

When Arthur’s drink was finished, the glass rose into the air and gently placed itself in the sink as Gilbert observed silently. “You’ll see me again,” Arthur said as he stood up and patted the top of the bar. “Unless you get found, and conscripted. Then it’s doubtful.” He was smiling.

Gilbert rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. “I’ll do my part to make sure that doesn’t happen - and you do yours.”

Arthur left, and Gilbert lingered in the bar a little while longer - he had one more drink for himself.

Several days passed, and Gilbert did not see any more of Arthur. It was business as usual. However, on the third day since his unexpected visitor, rumours began to circulate, and they made their way into the bar - “The Jedi are mobilising,” many of the local patrons were saying. “They are coming to liberate Nebulan.” They felt safe to speak such words, because that day there were no Sith to be found in the establishment. Most likely, if the rumours were found true, they were preparing for battle.

“Oh, wouldn’t that be something,” he’d say, serving them their drinks and cleaning up, just as every night. Gilbert remained calm and neutral as he discussed the matter. There was a buzz in the air from the patrons, however - he was tipped generously, and the energy was higher than it had been in a long time.

Gilbert went home that night. He lived in a very small home not far away from the bar, located in one of Nebulan’s largest cities. His own bar was just outside of a main shopping district, down a quiet street. His own home was even quieter.

He went inside, removed his boots, said hello to his home droid, K-6, and went to his bedroom. There, he stood for a long time, into his wardrobe that opened before him, and stared at the beige robes that hung up neatly inside. His old Jedi robes, that he had not worn in a long time.

The Jedi were coming. Gilbert had a choice - remain in the shadows as he was, and leave the fate of the planet up to others, or take charge, as he used to. Fight, as he did. He was one of the Jedi’s finest pilots and duelists. Gilbert had been strong, he had been brave. He knew this.

He stepped forward and reached into an inner cabinet of the wardrobe. He pulled out his lightsaber. He had not held it for a long time. Silver and black, with an elegant handle and inside, a synthetic red crystal. It was a lightsaber fit for a Sith, but it was Gilbert’s, one he had crafted from hand and loved very much, no matter his alignment.

He glanced up when someone was in his house. He did not move. He knew who it was.

“Are you jealous that someone might kill me before you do?” Arthur’s voice was light and teasing. He was leaning against the doorframe, Gilbert could see that without even turning around. Damn, he was so sure of himself.

“Hardly. If there’s one thing I don’t have to worry about, it’s you getting killed by some random Jedi you don’t approve of.”

“You’re not wrong,” said Arthur as he approached. Gilbert kept the lightsaber in his grasp, gripping it tightly as he felt Arthur’s hands slide up his back, to start at his shoulderblades, and move around to hug him loosely around Gilbert’s neck. Arthur’s cheek pressed against his own and it took every ounce of willpower for Gilbert not to lean into that. He took a deep breath instead and kept his gaze focused on the symbolic article of clothing, that probably stood as a metaphor for his past strength, or something like that.

“You’re the only one,” Arthur finished.

“I wasn’t aware that it was so easy to declare yourself immortal in that way,” Gilbert responded, weakly. Damn it, his resolve was crumbling. He leaned back into the other man - a little bit, just ever so slightly.

Arthur, meanwhile, was probably drinking it in. “What will you do?” he asked, as one hand reached up to thread through Gilbert’s hair with surprising grace. “Will you fight?”

Gilbert closed his eyes. If he put on those robes and returned as a Jedi when they arrived, it would be like nothing had changed. Arthur would still be a Sith, and Gilbert would still only ever see him when they faced in battle, only fleeting moments as they subtly defended each other’s life while furthering their own goals.

Wasn’t that sort of back-and-forth what Gilbert was tired of?

But wasn’t the justice of the galaxy, the thrill of the fight, and the ability to use his powers why he joined the Jedi to begin with? Why he turned away from the Dark Side, and why he continues, to this day, to resist its temptation?

Gilbert lowered the saber. His own subtle way of relinquishing control.

Arthur kissed his cheek and pulled away, his fingers lingering on Gilbert’s shoulder for just a moment longer than necessary. “I will keep you safe,” he promised.

As he stepped away, Gilbert turned to face him for the first time. Arthur was already turning on his heels to go, and Gilbert felt a bit cold. “Arthur,” he called after him.

The man stopped and turned, eyeing him carefully. “Yes?”

“Would you like a drink?”

The Sith smiled a slow, very knowing smile. Gilbert simply took a deep breath. Arthur knew what this meant. Gilbert knew what this meant.

Arthur was already beginning to shed his robes.

“I’d love that.”

A/N: So, I think that I will be continuing this, as I greatly enjoyed playing with it - but I may begin at a different time, perhaps “at the beginning” when Gilbert and Arthur first meet, and both of their origins are further explored. I’m still a bit unsure.

I hope it made sense and I hope that you enjoyed it! Any and all feedback would be lovely!

[the-heaminator]

favourite part about pruk?

Many things

They have a history stretching all the way back to the crusades and have kind if been a part of eachothers history ever since, they're very similar and very different at the same time, two 40 something year old men sitting on the sofa watching coronation street reruns and eating shitty curry. Two absolutely traumatized but unable to Express said feelings so internalize them until.they blow out in excessive alcohol or even drugs.

Borderline hoarder (Arthur) vs military cleanliness (Gilbert)

They're both feral and domesticated and I love them so much h

[the-heaminator]

now i'm going to ask you about your version of pruk for the ask game hehe. and while i'm here, maybe gereng? for comparison? 👀👀

Gives nose/forehead kisses: 

Lmao for once I'd say Arthur instigated them, this says more about Gilbert than it says about anyone else. If Arthur is unnacoustomed to touch, Gilbert is always a couple levels ahead, even soft little kisses with purely chaste intentions gets Gilbert into a blushing mess of curses.

Gets jealous the most:

Arthur, hes the metaphorical green eyes monster, Gil can be jealous, he just tends to internalize it and it comes out as bitterment, Arthur will become jealous quicker and will be more likely to bite.

Takes care of on sick days:

Usually it's just whoever is the least diseased, can ee mostly straight and has most of their organs in the right place, but based on the fact that Gilbett gets ill more often, Arthur plays nurse more. They make each other eat cod liver oil out of spite (I'm still mad about this)

Drags the other person out into the water on beach day: 

Arthur does the dragging, salt encrusted sewer rat wants to drag his sewer pigeon husband into the water. Gilbert gets so badly burned each time, like he wears full body clothes at the beach to stop getting burned, goes into the water and comes out looking like a lobster and goes to sleep with a beer in hand in the shade afterwards.

Brings the other lunch at work:

Neither of them eat unless they're like about to fall down, they just forget food is an option, but Gilbert has more spare time so I'll say he at least tries to get a sandwich into him and Arthur at least once every two days.

Tries to start role-playing in bed: 

Look me in the eyes and tell me that Gilbert could roleplay if his life depended on it. Good, we know its Arthur, Gilbert has the sensibilities of a kid brought up in a strict catholic school as a choir boy, he gets flushed red when someone takes their shirt off, getting in bed is a task that needs a lot of reassurance and cuddling, because Gilbert is not fucking good at this and Arthur is a whore of the highest calibre, so they have to make do by being relatively much slower than Arthur is used to, but it's still pleasurable. Gilbert tries to be smooth. It has not worked in 200 years.

Embarrassingly drunk dancer: 

Yes

Firmly believes in couples costumes: 

Both of them, Gilbert would plan this so fucking well, I'm never forgetting that one fanart where Arthyr is a plug socket and Gilbert's a fork because hA.

Breaks the expensive gift rule during Christmas:

Neither of them, Gilbert prefers making things by hand, as does Arthur, so they're not technically buying things, but Gilbert has a tiny crochet Gilbird and all the jumpers and scarves his skinny ass could want and Arthur has wonderfully carved picture frames and little bits of welding that serve actual use around the house.

Makes the other eat breakfast:

Again, neither of them eat properly, so it's just whoever realises that they having eaten in half a week and pesters the other to eat too,posters bothgoddamn trainwrecks when it comes to looking after themesvles.

Remembers anniversaries: 

Gilbert, only because he had a list on the fridge if shit we need to do this week, or they would both forget too, they really are not good at this.

Brings up having kids first:

Already enough kids, Arthur made sure of that.

Kills the bugs:

Whoever find it gets to eat it, Arthur likes spiders, so does Gilbert.

First to define them as a couple:

Neither, more someone like Francis went "That's kinda gay I'm not gonna lie" and they went OH SHIT. Again, emotional processing as good as a computer from the 50s.

Who hides their guilty pleasures longer:

Usually this would be Arthur, but if Guilty and pleasure are together in a sentence you know its gotta be Gilbert, my man has enough repression to kill a horse, at least Arthur's a whore about it, Gilbert gets antsy when something he likes doing isn't deemed useful and then just diesnt do it, Arthur is a repressed anxious man, Gilbert is worse somehow.

Snorts while laughing:

Yes.

[the-heaminator]

I posted 6,782 times in 2022

That's 6,755 more posts than 2021!

516 posts created (8%)

6,266 posts reblogged (92%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@starflight-reblog

@fireandiceland

@disneyprincessdxminatrix

I tagged 5,599 of my posts in 2022

Only 17% of my posts had no tags

#yes - 847 posts

#the heam speaks - 90 posts

#biology - 74 posts

#ask answered - 73 posts

#hws england - 67 posts

#pruk - 55 posts

#the heam writes - 41 posts

#yea - 28 posts

#canon being built different - 27 posts

#fruk - 27 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#“oh my god what is this frenchified clown dutch? what are you doing? why do i find it so cute? oh my god i’m going to have a stroke. i need

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

HETALIA CHARACTERS AS SHIT I'VE HEARD TEACHERS DO AND SAY

America: *chases a child around in a Caterpillar costume on all fours and screeching*

England: "The best way to get rid of a body is either dissolving it in acid or feeding it to pigs"

Germany: "I feel like I'm aiding and abetting some criminals here"

Prussia: "This is a but, and a very big but it is"

France after someone makes too many virgin jokes: "Well you should be a virgin and if you aren't then please give my condolences to whoever gave you your first rodeo, they just have been so dissapointed"

Russia: "You can make a molotov cocktail at home using alcohol and a rag, but don't tell you parents I told you this"

Denmark: *Walks around school in neon green speedos and a neon pink raincoat*

Latvia: "My ears may be small but they hear all your secrets"

Italy: "mAMMa mIa this computer will be the death of me!"

69 notes - Posted April 14, 2022

#4

PROMPTS FOR HETALIA POLYSHIP WEEK 2022

(June 14/Day 1) Sleepy mornings/ Winter/ Pets

(June 15/day 2) First Kiss/ space/ Family

(June 16/Day 3) Rainy day/ Spring / Storms

(June 17/day 4) Lets get you out of those wet clothes/ And there was only 1 bed/ Supernatural

(June 18/Day 5) Flowers/ Painting/ Beach

(June 19/Day 6) Tiredness/ Angst/ Murder

(June 20/Day 7)  Road trip/ Childhood/ Family

(June 21/Day 8) Whatever the fuck you want.

Please if you have any queries or requests ask in @magictrio1118 or @heta-polyweek2022

92 notes - Posted May 28, 2022

#3

The real question is which nations would have a tumblr

My bet would be on Iceland

127 notes - Posted November 7, 2022

#2

Oh can you write ukfrain? I thought like a love triangle (real one) and they're all too dumb to notice they're in love with each other. I do like Frain being very close and lot of PDA dispite them not saying and England feeling jealous because he/she isn't between them.

Oh wait. It can be nyo if you want 👀

OH, OH ok apparentl;y this turned into the horniest thing ive ever written. maybe im just feeling gayer than usual. A lot of this went into describing what i like about women im so sorry

Y E S. These shits being oblivious and England being jealous and all being very gay

Names bc Nyos: Isabella (Spain) Francene (France) Elizabeth (England)

Dammit why was Isabella so pretty!

This was the simultaneous thought of more than one very gay women in the conference room as Spain flounced up to give her speech.

Spain in a suit could turn most women gay, let's be real here, but if they were already gay, that could be a small problem.

As she droned on about agriculture most people had tuned out and were busy doing various things, like being on their phones, irritating someone or staring at Isabella's hips, luckily for Isa, only 2 people were staring at her hips. But unluckily for her, it was Francene and Elizabeth, one was her best friend (and fuck buddy) and the other was her past rival (now occasional fuck buddy.) 

Now you could argue that  Francene and Isabella's relationship had long surpassed being just fuck buddies, looking after each other and cuddling in the rain, being there when the other was down, kissing eachther goodnight, while sleeping in the same bed.

Normal homie behaviour at its finest.

After that it was Francene, she gave an actually well delivered and structured speech about strikes and why they happen and how to prevent them to avoid major closures. Most people were listening and to some extent Isa and Elizabeth were too, but they were also getting occationally sidetracked by Francenes clothing choices. A very close fitting waistcoat that left little to imagination and even though the skirt reached the knee, it showed her stocking clad calves and if she stretched, parts of her thigh and it was really sending Elizabeth around the bend.

She knew that Francene was mostly occupied by Isabella, but she really wanted to be held dammit. Preferably by either or both of those 2.

When it was finally Elizabeth's turn to speak, she pointedly avoided looking at either of the two. After all she was not wearing anything exactly provocative and her bodily dimensions left a lot to be desired, so she wouldnt have to worry.

At least that's what she thought.

Her bin provocative clothing and her overall dimensions did nothing to stop the two romance nations imagining things that would have gotten them flogged in centuries past.

I mean Elizabeth has done it before, so why not again.

Elizabeth's presentation on urban and rural development was the end to the incredibly long meeting.

Most nations had agreed to go to the pub before going to their hotels and probably sleeping, though some noises occasionally said otherwise.

Elizabeth walked to the canteen, avoiding Isabella and Francene like the plague, even if that meant being around Julchen and Amelia, two women who had no idea what being quiet was.

Except today, they were mostly silent, only muttering to each other under their breaths.

After an infuriating 5 minutes she asked "What is wrong with you two, neither of you have said awesome or dude yet and you're being awfully quiet."

Julchen, being an absolute beast at covering up her tracks and 100% wanted to torture Elizabeth said "We were talking about how I'm pretty sure that Isa and Francene have a thing going on."

"Oh you think I dont know that? I hear ✨sounds✨" she said, quite disgruntled as you would imagine.

She looked over at the two who were being so sappy that she couldn't look away defo not imagining herself in some questionable positions .

Elizabeth stopped her beer while Julchen did as well, Amelia was being a pussy in the corner and drinking coke.

But a couple of beers later, everyone is understandably a bit tipsy and whilst Amelia was stuck with dragging a mooning Elizabeth and a very depressed Julchen out of the bar.

Amelia looked on in dismay as Elizabeth sort of walked (she wasn't stumbling but like still a bit wobbly) over to the very passionately making out duo in the back.

And her tongue being plied with a generous amount of liquid courage says "Can I join you?"

See the full post

218 notes - Posted May 5, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I think us, as the hetalia fandom, ship so prolifically because we know that without stupid romance what has hetalia got to offer us, I'll tell you what.

Pain, bloodshed, the sufferings of people who have lived though countless wars and lived to tell the tale, killed, maimed, often people close to their heart, or what's left of it

219 notes - Posted November 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[koolkat9]

Pruk Week 2022: Day 1

@prukweek

Prompt: Royal || Body guard

Rating: T

Paring: Pruk

Word Count: 1498

Their Happily Ever After

Once upon a time, in a faraway land, yadayada. There was a kingdom yadayadayada. A prince. But we don’t really care about him (at least not yet). No, our story is interested in a young thief, barely the age of ten.

Arthur Kirkland was from a long line of thieves. His grandparents were thieves, His mother was a thief. His brothers and sister were thieves. So logically, Arthur Kirkland would be a thief. And our young Arthur could not wait to start and become the best thief out of his family (and finally have something to shove in his brothers’ faces). So when his brother Alastair invited him to sneak into the castle with them, Arthur was quick to agree.

But then, the guards came, and when his brother turned left, Arthur instead turned right. He ended up collapsing outside in what looked like a garden. It was small and quaint, but despite its size, all kinds of colourful flowers lined the perimeter. In the center, there was a small fountain, overgrown with vines, broken down, but still beautiful. Though the fountain was far from the most beautiful thing in the garden.

In the far corner, below an old oak tree, sat a boy with snow white hair, porcelain skin, and crimson red eyes. He looked beautiful. Almost like the fairies, Arthur had seen in books or as described by his brothers. Quietly, Arthur approached.

The red-eyed boy immediately looked up, spooked, though his hard glare tried to mask it. “How did–Y-You shouldn’t be here,” he hissed.

Arthur blinked himself out of his daze. “S-Sorry I…I think I’m a little lost.” Now, one thing you should know about the Kirklands: Kirklands never apologized. But when the boy looked at him with both strength and fear, Arthur buckled.

The boy sighed and rose from his spot under the tree. “I guess I don’t really have a choice but to guide you out.”

And so our young thief followed the fairy-like boy through the twisting halls that made up the castle. Just as they were about to reach the exit, something caught Arthur’s eye. They passed by a door that had been left wide open leading to a room full of books. Shelves reaching almost to the ceiling filled the room, the comfiest looking chairs surrounded a large brick fireplace on the farthest wall and the dark wooden accents finished off the cozy room. Though Arthur had never been taught to read, he had always loved stories and books so this room seemed like a dream.

His guide took notice, his gaze softening. “Would you like to take a peek?”

“I-I…”

The boy smirked. “It’s not every day outsiders get to come to the castle. You should take this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”

Arthur looked over at the boy, then back at the library. The boy was right, who knew if he would ever get a chance like this again? Before he could talk himself out of it, Arthur ran into the room.

The young thief looked around in awe, almost falling on his butt as he looked up at the wall of books beside the fireplace. Though he could never hope to read all these books in his lifetime, he would be content if he could read just one. He grabbed a book of fairytales, drawn in by the twisting gold vines on the spine and cover of the old leather book. He flipped through the pages, amazed by the imagery in front of him as he tried to piece together the story from the illustrations alone.

The boy hovered over his shoulder. “You like fairy tales?” He asked.

“Yes…um…” Arthur looked up at the boy before looking down at the book with pink cheeks. “I…I don’t exactly know how to read, but…My brothers are quite the storytellers, and they always tell me one before I go to sleep…Unfortunately, we don’t have money for books.”

The boy’s eyes widened “You can’t read?”

“No…I-I’d like to but…”

“I’ll teach you,” the boy stated. He took Arthur’s hand and pulled him towards a nearby chair.

For nearly a decade, Arthur would sneak in with the help of the boy with the snow-white hair, and they’d spend every other afternoon in the library, teaching Arthur how to read. And for a moment, Arthur wasn’t focused on being a thief or one-upping his brothers, all that mattered was the fairy-like boy with fiery red eyes and all the books this boy had in his possession.

You’d think that as a thief and a cunning one at that, Arthur would have used this opportunity to at least steal something of value, but when Arthur was with this boy, he couldn’t bring himself to. What if he got caught? What would the boy think if he found out? Over the years, the boy slowly revealed how lonely he was. His father ignored him, his title was to be given to his younger brother, he didn’t have any friends, and even the staff of the castle seemed to avoid him. Arthur couldn’t ruin the one friendship he seemed to have. And if Arthur was being honest, he himself was lonely as well and couldn’t bare to lose his only friend.

But all good things had to come to an end. At seventeen, Arthur finally learned the true identity of his friend; Prince Gilbert. All this time he had been schmoozing with a member of the royal family. And worst of All the king had caught wind of his son’s and Arthur’s relationship. In the end, Arthur was given an ultimatum, never step foot in the kingdom again and thus never see Gilbert again or rot in jail for trespassing on royal grounds. With a heavy heart, Arthur had chosen the prior.

Years went by, and the prince had no idea where his friend had ended up. He spent his days, isolated and lonely in the library until the day of his father’s death. A true damsel if there ever was one.

But upon his father's death, finally free from their father’s tyrannical hand, Gilbert and his brother Ludwig were reunited. Crowned Prince Ludwig had always seemed cold and stoic, but as soon as they were able to meet each other face to face, Ludwig broke and was pulled into the tightest hug imaginable. Suffice it to say, our prince Gilbert was welcomed back into the royal line.

Though no longer lonely, Gilbert could never forget the thief who had stolen his heart. Despite royal duties often getting in the way, Gilbert would return to the small garden he had first met the thief, hoping that the boy would return one day.

On the day of Ludwig’s coronation, Gilbert sat by the window, looking out at the garden. With all the commotion of the day, he knew he wouldn't be able to sneak off to the garden. Not that he wanted to. He had to be there for his baby brother. Currently, He was waiting for his new guards to come to fetch him. His father had never cared to give him proper security, but now that Ludwig was in charge he was going to be given a whole branch to ensure his protection.

A knock at the door signaled the first group was here already. With a deep breath, the prince collected himself. Now wasn’t the time to lament about a relationship lost to time. He opened the door and came face to face with a familiar pair of green eyes and a head of dirty blond hair. The thief had done it again. “Art–”

“Your knight in shining armour has arrived,” Arthur said with a bow.

“Does that make me the princess?” Gilbert asked with a choked laugh.

“Absolutely.”

So many questions swam around the prince’s mind: Where had Arthur been all this time? Why was he dressed in a guard’s uniform? Was he to be Gilbert’s guard? So many questions, so little time, so instead, he leaped forward, pulling his friend into a tight hug. He laughed and cried into Arthur’s messy hair, though far cleaner than he had ever seen before.

“I’m here…I’m here love,” Arthur whispered, hugging Gilbert back just as tight.

“I missed you.”

“I missed you too.”

Gilbert refused to let go, even as another knock sounded at the door, signaling that Ludwig's coronation was about to begin. But Gilbert didn't want to leave. Not when Arthur was now at his fingertips. He leaned in only for Arthur to turn towards the door.

"I think we better head down. It would be bad if I got fired on my first day."

Gilbert let out a groan. For once, he missed being left out of these royal events. "Okay…" he reluctantly agreed, pulling away.

Arthur offered his arm, and the prince gladly accepted.

After the coronation festivities, the kingdom had a newer, kinder King, and Prince Gilbert and former thief Arthur were finally able to start their own happily ever after.

The end!

[the-heaminator]

5, 10 and 28 for any ship(s) of your choice?

sorry this took so long, ill do it for engport and pruk bc t h e m

Porteng:

5: Describe their cozy night in

Envision this, Arthur is very tired and Port managed to get him to actually eat something, and in typical Arthur fashion, he ate a bit too much because he "forgot" to eat for the past 2 days, and they're cuddled up in the blanket on the sofa, watching something stupid as they slowly drop off to sleep.

10:Describe their first date

Their first official "date" was sometime in the 90s where they both went out to a bookshop, or library and Portugal finally confesses, thougj it is a well known fact that the two have been a thing since like the early 1800s, theyre browing books in a quiet corner and port grabs arthur and kisses him.

28. Pet names, do they have or like them

yes, they have a lot of pet names, portugal calls him all sorts of affections in portugeese and Arthur uses a whole host of strange things, but portugal knows that usually they mean good

PRUK

5: Their cozy night in

Both a lil tipsy and snuggled up in the bed talking about the most random shit and making random sounds, gossiping, like a high school sleepover( at least i think so, never been to one)

10: Their first date

idk how this would actually go, because i just cant envison the frst date properly, but all i know is that its very stupid. sorry!

28: pet names?

They definitely have pet names, but i have a feeling a large amount of them are cuss words