#YOURE HOT THEN YOURE COLD YOURE YES THEN YOURE NO YOURE IN THEN YOURE OUT etc etc

[rafesangelita]

౨ৎ ˙⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 deciding to host the biggest house party on figure eight, you and rafe cut celebrations short after a heated game of beer pong.

warnings: established relationship, alcohol consumption, irresponsible drinking, rafe takes a body shot off of reader, unprotected sex, rough sex (?), rafe puts you in a chokehold <3, dirty talk, praise, overstimulation

wc: 1.1k

everyone knew your parties were absolute ragers, with strangers filling out every corner of your house, and the cops always shutting the place down at the end of the night, to say your parties were the most anticipated on the island would be an understatement. even now as you and rafe challenged one another in a classic game of beer pong, you were sure there was people passed out drunk somewhere. “loser has to take a body shot.” rafe walked around the table, his hand sneaking under your skirt as he passed by. he loved threatening you with a good time.

you rolled your eyes, your best friends cheering you on as you and rafe went round after round until you both only had one more cup left. rafe had a look in his eye that was all too familiar. you knew he secretly wanted to lose, the terrible throw of his ping pong ball confirming your suspicions of him missing on purpose. “aww, are you letting me win?” your smile was the epitome of perfection, your boyfriend motioning for you to go as he grabbed a bottle of tequila from topper. sure enough, an excited squeal left your lips as the little ball landed straight into rafe’s red solo cup.

rafe pretended to be disappointed, his adam’s apple bobbing in his throat when he downed the last of the burning liquor. truth is; rafe wanted to get his hands, and mouth, on you since the second he saw you walk down the stairs in that pretty little outfit of yours. if losing to you meant he could run his tongue up your soft flesh and cop a feel of what was under your sequined top, then that’s what he was going to do. rafe walked over, grabbing your hand as he guided you on top of the table. the crowd burst into a fit of cheers, your cheeks heating when rafe gave you a little wink.

you laid flat against the hard surface, your fingers pulling at the hem of your skirt. glancing down at your hands, rafe cursed under his breath when his favorite thong peeked through your bottoms. “you’re in trouble.” rafe slipped off his shirt, laying the article of clothing across your lap so no one else can steal a glimpse of what was his. everyone was hollering as all eyes fell on you and rafe, nervous butterflies fluttering in your tummy. leaning down, rafe licked a stripe up the column of your throat, his lips finding yours in a searing kiss.

after what felt like an eternity, you sighed blissfully when he pulled away, wasting no time in placing a lime between your lips. “you gonna be a good sport and take this for me?” he unscrewed the bottle of tequila, your stomach flipping in excitement. “sí— yes.” as soon as that word left your mouth, rafe tipped the bottle over, the cold substance sending a shiver down your spine. topper and kelce stepped closer, the flashlights to their phones blinding your vision as rafe’s tongue flattened against your skin, the warm muscle moving all the way up to the valley of your breasts.

“no bra?” he teased, licking all the way up to the underside of your jaw. taking the lime from your mouth with his own, everyone erupted in cheers when rafe stood up, topper jumping in the air as he saved the video to his camera roll. you would definitely need to see that later. rafe helped you up from the table, making sure your outfit was in place before throwing his t-shirt over his shoulder. you’d be lying if you said you weren’t a bit weak in the knees after feeling rafe taste your skin. wrapping an arm around your waist, rafe whispered in your ear as he guided you two back inside.

“you wear those panties on purpose?” his breath was hot against your cheek, his arm pulling you close to his chest. “no.. my first option was to wear no panties at all.” rafe nodded, a dry laugh falling from his lips. “oh, that’s cute.” he knew you were serious too, and that’s what drove him crazy. before he could say anything else, you pulled away from him, losing yourself in the sea of people before he saw you making your way upstairs, your mini skirt shining underneath the neon lighting of your house. once your door clicked behind you, it wasn’t long before it busted open again.

all it took was rafe seeing your lacey pink thong to get you in the position you were in right now; getting fucked in a headlock while rafe grunted praises in your ear.

“wrapping around me so fuckin’ tight..”

“fuckkk, you’re taking me like the perfect little slut you are.”

“this is what you wanted right? ‘wanted this pretty pussy to get pounded in?”

all you could do was pathetically repeat his name, tears lining your eyes at just how good he felt. his bicep hugged your neck, your chin wobbling against the huge muscle as sounds of his skin meeting yours bounced off of the walls of your room. with his balls smacking against your clit, you nearly screamed when you felt the band in your stomach snap. “ray!” you gasped, your manicured nails digging into his flesh as your eyes rolled to the back of your head. “oh, my god!” you were jelly at this point, your limbs feeling like dead weight as rafe made no effort to slow down.

overstimulated and mumbling nonsense, you shook and trembled underneath rafe as he filled you to the brim with his seed, the second greatest feeling ever. the first being whenever he was inside you. rafe’s head rested on your back, his fingers squeezing your hips so hard you were sure to see bruises in the morning. he was panting by the time he finished, his cock still twitching with the aftershocks of his orgasm. collapsing down next to you, rafe gave you a lazy smile, both of you looking equally fucked-out.

“we should probably shut this down soon, it sounds like it’s getting pretty rowdy out there.” you sighed, snuggling into rafe’s side. “i just want to stay like this.” wrapping his arms around you, rafe inhaled the scent of your perfume. “how have you not gotten a citation yet? the cops have been out here at least six times already.” you groaned, feeling sleep pull at your eyelids. “please don’t jinx it.” as if on cue, there was a flash of red and blue lights, a siren sounding from outside. you and rafe froze. “what did i just say?!” you huffed, already dreading having to get dressed and talking to the police.

[imaginaryf1shots]

Heatstroke | Max Verstappen

WC: 2.6K

Max x Platonic!Driver!reader, Grid x Driver!reader

Summery: When you made the switch to Formula 1, no one told you how bad the Qatar GP can be

Warning: Heatstoke??

Masterlist

Max Masterlist

y/n y/f/n, is a name that’s been making headlines for months now. When the rumours first started everyone thought they were just, that, rumours. But in F1 rumours don’t just come out of thin air, especially ones like this. Red Bull is changing their line up and they’re bringing in a female? A woman whose already in her mid-20s. A NASCAR driver, a runner up for the drivers’ championship three times. Not many switch from other series to Formula, the other way around. Yes. So, it’s a rumour everyone presumed.

But why are there photos of you in Milton Keynes? Why is Max suddenly following you on Instagram? Why is your NASCAR team not posting you on their social media anymore? How come it’s already the winter break and no confirmation on who will be take the empty seat in the Red Bull team?

You ignored your social media, since someone leaked your move from NASCAR to F1. You stopped caring a long time ago, stopped looking a long time ago. A long life in motorsports taught you not to care. The life of a female in motorsports is not easy even now in the 21st century. Female fans have it hard, female presenters have it hard, female mechanics have it hard, and certainly female drivers have it hard. But it only made you stronger and your skin thicker.

When Red Bull finally announced that you’d be the one driving for them in the new season, they were met with both positive and negative response. You’re an enigma coming into the sport. No one’s seen you in a Formula 1 car before, or a car in the feeder series. But you did start in karting and your records are still unbroken.

While everyone was enjoying their winter break, you spent it training in the gym, on the sim, and in previous F1 cars. No time to spare, to get you ready for the new season. A season Red Bull has high hopes for.

You were able to meet Max a few times since you joined the team, but he was mostly off enjoying his break. Only by the time the preparations for the new season that he’s actually got to know you. Surprisingly to many, you and Max got on well with each other. Max instantly took a liking to you, you may be not that much younger than him, but he saw you as a younger sister. Max also did his homework while he was on vacation and watched many of your races in NASCAR and he was impressed, he couldn’t wait for you to race in F1. Like his team, he thinks your experience will bring in a fresh eye to the sport and to the team.

The pre-season practice was the first time you met the rest of the grid. Everyone has been pleasant and nice; Lewis Hamilton had a long talk with you about your experience in motorsports as a female and he shared some of his challenges being the only black man in the history of the sport. It was such a long and deep talk; the 7 times world champion gave you his number and promised to chat more later.

Max pulled you to the talking circle he was having, he was talking to Lando, Carlos and Charles. You loved how much he tried to include you in on everything, make you feel welcome.

It was the Qatar Grand Prix, a race almost everyone hated, just for the fact that it’s one of, if not the, hottest races on the calendar. You had no idea how hot it could get, but the team tried to pred you as much as they could. FP1-3 were hard when you were doing long runs, it got hot in the cockpit. You’re thankful they decided to not have a sprint this year. You had no idea how you’ll manage in the actual race. Water was your friend since FP1.

“How do you handle all that heat?” You asked Max, as you laid on a sofa on the side of the debriefing room, he was on a chair as if he wasn’t just in the car melting.

“Lots of water and eat whatever I’m given.” Max said sipping on his cold-water bottle. “Didn’t you train for the heat after the last race?”

“I did, but it’s still nothing like the real thing.” You mumbled, Max patted your knee in sympathy.

“Hey, you did good though, starting P2 tomorrow.” Max tried to cheer you up, you gave a weak smile.

“Okay, everyone here?” You sat up from the sofa and moved to your chair for the meeting.

The race was too long in your opinion, definitely one of the hardest races you had to do in your career. How can it be so hot at night, the humidity was killing you.

“No one said it’ll be this hard before I joined.” You complain through your radio, something you don’t usually do, since the media likes to call you whiney and used as an excuse as to why women shouldn’t be in Formula 1.

“Thought you might change your mind.” Your engineer teased and you sighed.

“I might’ve.” You joked back, knowing you wouldn’t, sweat was dripping everywhere. “How many laps left?”

“16, hang in there and drink water.”

“You mean tea, it’s so hot, still don’t get why you couldn’t throw cold water on me.” You had a gap between you and George Russel in P4 behind you and you were closing in on Lando in front of you. You were getting closer lap after lap. He undercut you earlier in the race and now you’re 2 seconds behind him.

“Maybe next time… gap to Norris 1.4.”

The next 5 laps were hard, you managed to overtake Lando, but it took so much out of you.

“Okay, just keep your head down.” Your race engineer said, and it took a few seconds for you to register what he was saying and a few more to answer him.

“Okay.” Your voice was breathy and weaker than earlier.

“Almost there.” He encouraged you; you hummed and did your best to keep the lead you have on Lando now, you’re in clean air, no car in sight in front of you.

“How many laps?” You asked but stopped talking as you felt like you’d throw up if you talked more.

“2 more, drink water even if it’s hot.”

You didn’t respond, there was no more water, it was too hot, but you drank and sweated everything already. The last lap felt so long, your car slowed down just slightly, but not enough for Lando to catch up with you.

“Well done y/n, that’s P2!” Your engineer cheered and you smiled weakly proud of yourself for finishing the race.

“Yay.” That was the weakest yay you’ve ever said. The in lap seemed like it took so long. Max and Lando were already parked. You closed your eyes and rested your head back, you had zero energy, moving seemed like torture. You slowly opened your eyes and took out your wheel placing it on the car.

Max after celebrating with the team, turned to look at you, only to see you still in the car. He frowned and moved back to where your car is parked next to his. He could see you moving a little which gave him little comfort.

“Hey, you, okay?” Max had removed his helmet already, his face was flushed red.

“Too tired.” You mumbled and Max strained his ears to hear what you said.

“I’ll help you out.” Max said he reached into your car and unbuckled your seatbelts. “Can you stand?”

You gave a weak nod and put your hands on the sides of the cockpit and tried to pull yourself up, but your legs were shaky, Max placed his hand on your waist to try and steady you.

“Get her a cold water.” Max told one of the Red Bull mechanics that came for the car, you leaned on the halo pretty heavily, Max put his other hand on your waist as well when you lifted your leg to hop over. You placed on of your hands on Max’s shoulder and moved your legs over the halo, before you just sat down on the car, placing your feet on the ground, this took more time than it needed to and much harder than it should’ve. “Raise your head.”

Max leaned down and unbuckled your helmet before he slowly removed it. Your balaclava was next, putting them beside you he could finally see your flushed face, loose hair sticking to your skin. The mechanic opens the bottle for you, and you take it gratefully from him, the cold water is a shock to your skin, but it offered a much-needed reprieve from the heat. You sipped slowly, feeling better now that you drank cold water.  Max was watching you with hawk eyes.

“Come on we need to get weighed.” Max told you after you drank most of the water bottle. You nodded, and turned to put the wheel back in but max took it from you and hocks it back up. Your focus isn’t really that good at the moment, so you don’t notice Max walking behind you, ready to catch you if you stumble. You’re too tired to run to your team, but while Lando gets interviewed you walk up to them, you get patted on the back softly. It’s obvious how much this race had taken out of you. You’re still flushed, and sluggish.

“y/n, welcome to Qatar.” Jensen said once you stood in front of him, you offered him the best smile you could, but it wasn’t that big. “First season in Formula 1, you’re second in Qatar how would you rank this week amongst the ones you’ve done so far?”

“Uh, hardest, definitely the hardest.” You answer, all the lights shinning and the screens around aren’t helping with the heat.

“But you did amazing over taking Lando and getting second place, did you expect this coming into the weekend?” Jensen asked feeling sympathetic towards you.

“Well, um, I expected to do well before the race, during the race I wasn’t so sure, but I knew I just had to push through it for the team.” You said and the team cheered you on, you felt like they were farther than they were, your hearing coming and going. Jensen asked you his last question before you were free to go. You felt like your body was on auto piolet. Moving away from the cameras and in the direction of the cool down room. Once you were next to a wall you leaned on it, your trainer was by your side in a second.

“You need to sit down for a moment.” He told you, and in the middle of the hallway he helped you down, you just did as you were told. He unzipped your suit and pulled it down to your waist. Somone handed him a water bottle, he put some on his hand and patted your cheeks to cool you down. “We need an ice vest.” Someone rushed away, you just closed your eyes head on the wall. “Here, drink more.”

You sat there for a minute, before Max rushed over, he just finished his interview.

“Are you okay? Is she okay?” Max asked you before turning to your trainer, he crouched down to your height to have a closer look. “She should head to the medics.”

“No, no, it’s alright, I just needed a moment.” You said opening your eyes to look at your teammate.

“y/n, don’t p-“

“I’m fine, Max, I swear.” You say and put your hands on the floor and push yourself up, you lean on the wall for a moment, before you give Max a pleading look, he sighs and gestures for you to move in front of him. You walk into the cooldown room, and Lando is sitting alone.

“What? Did you have the debrief or something?” Lando asked jokingly, he had a cold water bottle pressed to his face.

“Yeah, talked about how to take you out of the race next time.” You joked and sat on the floor, not even trying to sit in your chair.

You didn’t slip your suit back on for the podiums, leaving the top part hanging by your waist. Your movements were still slow, but you managed to smile and celebrate a little with the other two drivers. You were the first person off the stage and instantly a cooling vest was slipped over your head, you were still hot. Max ran down the stairs after you.

He saw you stumble a little, you had to go to the medical centre. Max knew you well enough to know that if he asked you, you’d brush it off. But he got what he wanted one way or another. So, the reigning world champion came up behind you and just scooped you up. You gasped and wrapped your arms around his neck instantly.

“Max! what are you doing?”

“Taking you to the medical centre, and no you’re not fine.” You looked at your trainer over his shoulder, but one look at him and you saw that he agreed with Max.

Let’s say Max was right, you had a heatstroke and were on the verge of passing out. You missed the debrief much to your displeasure. The doctor gave you a list of things to do and not to do with your trainer by your side. The moment you were in your hotel room, you rushed to the bathroom to shower. The cold water feeling amazing on your skin, the AC was on. You just wore a tank top and a pair of boxer shorts to bed. And sleep you did. You really needed that sleep.

You woke up the next morning to knocking on your door, you groggily got up groaning as you did. Opening the door, you saw Max and Kelly. They’re both in casual clothes, smiling at you.

“Hey, what’s up? It’s too early.” You greeted them opening the door more for them to enter.

“It’s past 12.” Max informed you.

“Oh.”

“How are you feeling?” Kelly asked you and placed her hand on your skin to see if you’re still radiating heat or not. Max had informed her of your state last night, and from the glimpses she managed to see of you she knew you were feeling the heat.

“Better.” You smiled at her kindness, since you and Max have gotten close, you and Kelly also have formed a friendship.

“We ordered room service to your room.” Kelly told you; you thanked the couple. You threw on an oversized shirt on top of your clothes before you joined them, they had the small sofa for themselves, so you took the comfy armchair. “You did amazing yesterday, y/n.”

“Thank you, wish I felt as good as I did.” You complained and sighed.

You three talked about everything and nothing in particular. When the food arrived, you knew that Max has spoken to your trainer, because it was all the foods that the doctor suggested for you to eat. You drank to glasses of juice and a bottle of water as well. Keeping hydrated was on the top of the list.

“Who are you going back with to the UK?” Max asked, he would’ve loved if you’d moved to Monaco, but after joining the team you moved closer to the factory in the UK.

“Oscar and Fernando has to go to the factory so we’re taking his jet.” You informed him and he looked satisfied with your answer.

“Just take care of yourself.”

“Sure, dad, I will.”

“Hey!”

Main Taglist:

@gnatthefly . @mochimommy2002 . @llando4norris . @mrswolffs-blog . @barcelonaloverf1life . @c-losur3 . @xoscar03 . @schniti-is-in-the-house . @lottalove4evelyn . @eywas-heir . @glow-ish . @lilypat . @directioner5life .

[megamindsecretlair]

Make Me Weak, Part 2

Pairing: Sex Therapist!Terry Richmond x Sub!Black!Fem!/ Plus Size reader

Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI, You are in charge of your own reading experience. Intentional use of AAVE. Cursing, mentions of depression, anxiety, and description of sex acts and sexual issues. Hair pulling, PIV, condom use. Power imbalance, Shy!reader. Dark!Terry. Dom!Terry, AU Terry, all consensual. Sorry if I missed some. I'm not a therapist and while I do not make light of therapy, this is purely for my own fun. Please seek real medical attention when necessary.

Summary: You followed Dr. Richmond’s instructions to the best of your ability. You spent so much time in your mind that willingly descending into your body was an experience that opened your eyes to how much you had neglected. Your second session forces you to confront more truths than what you were ready for. 

Terry reaches some conclusions of his own as he tries to shake whatever is ailing him by disappearing between Tasia’s thighs. Yet his mind is on you, on your thoughts and words. During the second session, he can’t help but push you beyond your limit.

Word Count: 5,018k

Part 1 | AO3 Link

A/N: I'n back babbyyyy. I got so inspired reading so many lovely fics. Plus the encouraging asks really helped. I had TOO much fun writing this and you will not hurt my feelings if you don't want to read this one. However, I must tag to keep my taglist updated. Forgive me, my loves. Toss a coin to your blogger by leaving a comment, gif, or unhinged ask.

You

Hot steam rolled out from the shower as you set it to your desired temperature. You faced yourself in the mirror, thinking over Dr. Richmond’s words. You supposed that there was some truth to what he had told you.

Most people did start by exploring their own bodies first. It must be so easy for guys. Close the door, grab some lotion, and rub one out. Girls on the other hand…your life was constantly spent in a state of panic.

Panic that anything on your person would make your mother snap. Harsh criticisms hidden behind “just talkin’ shit” that Black people liked to hide behind. You were too sensitive to jokey-joke with when you weren’t able to reciprocate. It’s not like you could talk about your mom. It’s not like you could throw insults back in her face and tell her to take it in stride.

Panic that you could be caught or exposed at any point. You were a grown woman, yes. You were also taught to believe that you needed to act as if someone was watching. You believed there was some kind of life after all this and so wouldn’t it stand to reason that someone or something would be looking at you? Or worse, someone would come flying through your door because your family lacked boundaries? 

Panic that you didn’t know what lay on the other side of an orgasm. How would you feel? How would you look? Surely something like that changed a person. Feeling that rush of relief for the first time had to be special. Had to be amazing. Otherwise, why would anyone ever be obsessed with sex? 

Panic that you’d never reach that peak and fall over. Never feel that rush of euphoria that everyone talked about. Porn, books, friend groups. You always felt left out and you didn’t want to anymore, dammit. 

You watched yourself in the mirror as steam overtook it, inch by inch. Until you were only staring at your eyes and the disbelief written all over your face. Would this even work? Were you wasting your time? 

“I need total, focused commitment from you.”

Dr. Richmond’s sultry voice skittered along your naked skin. Goosebumps raised on your flesh from the cold air moving through the house. You would be focused. You would be committed. This was something you wanted so badly, you were fucking desperate. 

So you took deep, measured breaths using the Box method a previous therapist told you about. You inhaled for a count of four, held for four, exhaled for a count of four, and then held it for four. You repeated the process, doing a full body scan. 

You focused on your head, starting with your scalp. You focused on your forehead, feeling the tension melt away and your eyebrows start to relax. You hadn’t even realized that you had it scrunched.

You brought your attention to your eyes, unfocusing them, and allowed them to close. You repeated the process, breathing the entire time, settling down into your body when your mind wanted so badly to escape. To flee. To leave the Horrors. 

When you felt your mind drift, you didn’t chastise yourself. You continued to breathe, focusing on your breaths until you continued with your scan. Your body relaxed fraction by fraction. Your shoulders lowered from up around your neck. Aches and pains became more prominent. 

Your belly expanded and you sighed. You hadn’t even noticed how often you clenched your stomach, never allowing yourself a full breath. You always had to be on edge. Never knew where the next danger was coming from. What new fresh hell you would encounter just around the corner. 

By the time you reached your feet, you felt more relaxed than you had in a long time. Your body prickled with your newfound awareness. Steam caressed your bareskin and you quickly hopped in the shower, letting the warm water cascade across your body.

The water felt different on your body. Each droplet may as well have been a tiny earthquake, popping all over your skin and making you tingle. This…wasn’t too bad. 

You lathered up your facial scrub and gently moisturized your face, soothing the stiff areas. Your jaw popped as it loosened and you moaned from the relief. 

How long? How long have you spent outside of your body? A stranger to it? A foreigner to this vessel you carried around? Had you truly loved your body when you were so alien to it? Or had you just learned to layer on the armor and pretend? 

God, you felt like crying. With one session, Dr. Richmond already had you re-thinking your entire life. Like the answer was there in your face the entire time and you just needed him to shine a light on it. 

You rinsed your face while you grabbed a washcloth and lathered up with your favorite soap. You added body wash and then took your time trailing the washcloth around your body. Starting with your neck, you worked your way down to your chest. 

You took your time feeling the rough cloth against your smooth, watery skin. You rounded the washcloth across your nipples and they beaded under the slow torture. Oh, this was new. This was very nice. 

You were focused, letting the water act as a sound machine, lulling you into a further relaxed state. You followed the washcloth with your hand, moving over and under your areolas and nipples. You pinched your nipples and gave it a tug. You gasped from the responding tug in your pussy.

You moved on, remembering Dr. Richmond’s words about not making it sexual. But fuck, how could you not? 

Heat flushed beneath your skin that had nothing to do with the hot water on your body. You washed your back and then moved lower, skirting your throbbing pussy and washed your legs and dug the cloth between your toes. 

On the way up, your fingers glided around your mound, your hips pushing forward. Your breathing turned rapid, feeling yourself getting more and more excited. Your brain turned to mush, retreating from your actions. Like it wanted to picture something else. You shook your head, and started up with your Box breathing again.

You stopped mid-shower to reorient yourself and get yourself back into that zone of ultimate calm. If Dr. Richmond were there…

You focused on what he might say. There was no rush. There was no rulebook for this sort of thing. There was no reason to chastise yourself. There was no test to pass or box you had to check in order to achieve an orgasm. You just needed to relax, dammit. 

Slowly, achingly slow, you went back to that calm. You continued lathering up your body and then rinsed the soap off. You repeated the process, adding more soap to thoroughly wash your body. To enjoy the feel of the cloth and water and soap on your skin. On your body. 

“This is the only body you’ll ever have so it’s time to think beyond simple body maintenance. Admire your body.”

This was the only body you would ever have. It was time you stopped treating it like the enemy. 

You turned off the water and then got out. The chill air hit the water on your back and you shrieked and shivered, quickly drying off. You went through your nightly routine, taking care of your teeth, face, and deodorant. You sat down on a decorated stool in your bathroom to apply your lotion.

As instructed, you looked at your body. Every mole, every scar, every bump, and every wayward hair. Being in your body was weird to say the least. You had to disassociate to survive your childhood and you never learned to drop those defenses. Your body never realized that it wasn't at war anymore. Or perhaps it was and this was battle fatigue. You were so damn tired.

You massaged the lotion into your skin and then slipped in your panties. You pulled on an ankle bracelet you got while visiting New York once and it made you feel extra pretty, so why not. You turned on your bedside light and pulled out a notebook.

You started a new entry and wrote about the sensations and revelations you experienced. Some of it you would discuss with Dr. Richmond and some of it was never leaving your grave. It felt good to get it all out, uninterrupted.

Sometimes, venting to someone else just gave them room to talk over you. To steer the direction back to them. Brooklyn was like that. In an effort to relate, she ended up taking over the convo and made it about her situation. Then you ended up comforting her about her issue and never feeling truly heard about yours.

In a journal however, you pretended that you were just relaying it to a friend. The type of friend who allowed you to speak. To get your jumbled thoughts out without getting mad or trying overshadow you. 

Done, you collapsed against your bed as if every ounce of strength left your body. You breathed through it, allowed your body to rest for a moment. The hell kind of voo-doo shit did your therapist put you through?

Immediately, warning bells went off in your mind. Surely, you would be whisked away to some super important task around the house. Surely, your phone would ring with some awful accident you had to attend to. Surely…nothing. You were drained. You had nothing. 

You had just enough energy to put the journal up, turn off the light, and drift off to the deepest sleep of your life.

Terry

Tasia bounced like a porn star on Terry’s dick and it wasn’t doing a damn thing for him. He felt himself getting soft the more Tasia shuddered with her pleasure. At least one of them was having fun. 

Maybe he rushed this. Too intent on getting you out of his mind that he hopped immediately into Tasia’s warm heat and didn’t consider that there was no substitution. He knew it was irrational to be drawn to you so fast. After only one session. He was conflicted on that front, but it went beyond just looks. 

Your case, your assessments, your willingness to try, and your obvious smarts was a cocktail shooting through his veins and turning his body liquid. The perfect sub was dropped into his lap and he couldn’t do a damn thing about it.

And as a man used to getting his way in the bedroom, it stuck in his craw that he couldn’t have you. That it wasn’t your pussy that his dick disappeared inside of. Would you moan loudly? Were you shy in the bedroom? Were you enthusiastic? 

What would your mouth look like taking the full length of him? How far down could you suck him? Did that same determination translate to the bedroom?

Tasia grunted beneath him as his dick rose back to life, thoughts of you turning him harder than a brick. He could build a house with how hard he was at the moment, picturing the curves on your body. The natural handles in your waist for his big hands to wrap around. To hold.

He moaned, picturing it all so clearly. His thumbs would dig into your back. The sounds you would make. His hips jerked just thinking of pounding into you. No mercy. You weren’t some fragile flower. Your insightful thoughts were like a mirror to his own. He wanted to explore with you. And the fact that he couldn’t had him pulling Tasia’s hair back.

“Call me Dr. Richmond,” he commanded.

“Yes, D-Dr. Richmond,” Tasia moaned. It was starting to piss him off. 

“Softer,” he said.

“Yes, Dr. Richmond,” she said, bringing her voice lower, softer. It was nowhere near your voice, but it’d do for the fantasy he concocted in his head. He didn’t have time for any extra tricks tonight. He just needed to get to the other side of his nut. 

He closed his eyes and thought about your case. He wondered if you were doing as you were told. He wondered how well you would take commands in the bedroom. If he even had to give commands at all. If you’d instinctively know what he needed when he needed it. Tasia used to know that. Tasia used to have him out of breath. 

Now…she was a beautiful girl with deep mocha skin, a cute face, and wide expressive eyes. She was like a little doe in a meadow somewhere. He was attracted to the overall softness of her and of her body. The natural way she seemed to know what he needed. 

Perhaps it was him that had changed. His tastes. He was no longer interested in a casual sub-relationship. Perhaps he wanted a more permanent sub. One he could explore every single nasty fantasy with and never get bored. He was getting older, getting into his early-thirties without a significant partner.

And that was what he wanted. A partner. An equal. Someone he raced home to see or spent his days thinking about how he would break her and put her back together like a puzzle box. 

Terry groaned and came into the condom, gripping Tasia’s asscheeks for dear life. It was one of the hardest climaxes he ever experienced. His release triggered hers, causing her to fall forward as her pussy gripped his dick. 

He pulled out and immediately disposed of the condom, coming back to help clean up Tasia. 

“That was…different,” she said, using the word in place of something else. He didn’t want his reputation to slacken in that regard, but hell, this whole thing had been a mistake. He still made sure she came twice before he did, but he usually put more oomph into his sexual exploits. 

He usually had Tasia popping her pussy on his face, or contorting her like a pretzel. Now…he was just over it. Over trying to impress someone that wasn’t permanent in his life. That he couldn’t play with whenever he wanted. He was no longer excited at the prospect of making many women cum. He just wanted to make one cum over and over again. He wanted to collect each one like trophies. 

Terry grabbed Tasia’s hand and kissed the back of it. “Forgive me. Tonight should’ve probably been a gym night,” he said. He smiled for good measure, but it was a close-lipped smile.

“Oh, I’m not complaining. That dick still know how to rock my world,” she said. She stood up, pulling on her sweats and sweatshirt, and slipping on her sneakers. He sat down on the bed and watched her, not feeling an ounce of desire. 

She leaned over and grabbed his chin, making him look up at her. “You take care of yourself and whatever or whoever got you in this funk. And if you need more relief, you know my number,” she said.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said with another close-lipped smile. Tasia had been one of his longest play partners, he’d be sorry to see her go. She smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek, showing herself out. 

Terry sat in his fancy bedroom in his fancy house, staring at the empty archway Tasia disappeared through. His mind and body told him that he was ready for something more. Something tangible. Something he could hold and never let go. He only hoped he found it soon.

You

You clutched your journal to your chest as you sat in Dr. Richmond’s office. Nothing about it had changed except the man himself. He chose to wear a cream colored outfit. A soft, oatmeal colored sweater and khaki pants with white sneakers. His gold rimmed glasses flashed every so often from the light overhead and you couldn’t help catching every single thing about him. If only to distract you from your racing thoughts.

It was one thing to live in your body when you were in the comfort of your own bathroom. Your mind escaped once more, retreated to the safest place you knew. Your knee bounced with nervousness. 

“You don’t have to share if you don’t want to. This is a safe space. It’s your space. You get to decide what we do here,” he said. 

You closed your eyes to the sound of his voice. If he wasn’t so damn helpful, you’d ask for someone else. Literally, anyone else. But he was the first therapist to give you a glimpse of the other side. You wanted that more than you were embarrassed.

“No, I want to share. I need to share,” you said. You licked your lips and then cracked open your journal. You skimmed over things you didn’t want to reveal just yet. Too embarrassing for a second meeting, of course.

“I think…I think my mind is safer. I am constantly on alert that I’m “doing the right thing”, as opposed to what actually makes me happy,” you said. 

When you didn’t say anything, Terry leaned back in his seat. He rolled up his sleeves, revealing the golden brown of his forearms. Your mind emptied of any other thought until he cleared his throat. “Can you expand on that?” 

You looked up into his eyes before heat rushed to your ears. You looked back at your journal, focusing on that rather than his lush, pink lips. 

You told him more about how you reached this conclusion. That there was a standard for being Black that you never quite achieved. That at any moment, multiple mobs of people were coming for your Black card. Or, you were constantly trying to over-achieve at school. You had to work twice as hard, had to be the smartest in the class, because if you came home with a B, your mom went on a long rant about being stupid and never achieving anything real in life. Or how everyone praised you at work for going above and beyond and then got mad when you couldn’t sustain it. You were constantly on the lookout for someone else’s standard.

“I have so many fucking voices in my ear, telling me to do this or do that. And I fucking hate it. Which is wild considering that that’s what I seek in a sexual partner,” you said.

Dr. Richmond smiled and nodded. “Your mind is trying to re-contextualize your upbringing. Being submissive is actually about putting yourself in the position of power. A dom is only as good as how well he treats his sub. It’s about the ultimate act of trust on the submissive’s part,” he explained.

“Yes! And how can I trust that someone isn’t going to…take what I say or want and abuse that or make fun of me for it?” You asked. You played with the corner of your journal, not willing to look at Dr. Richmond. You didn’t need to see the pathetic pity in his steel blue eyes. 

“You have to stand resolute in what you want. You have to recognize that pleasure and sex is about give and take. Trust and acceptance. The right partner isn’t going to make fun of you, abuse you, or rush you,” he said. 

You sighed and leaned back on the brown sofa. You felt like you were chasing a unicorn. What kind of guy was willing to be dominant and care about your needs? Reassure you when you needed and took control when your body sent massive panicked waves at him? Took care of the trust you were placing in him to help you relax and cum? While also being physically attractive to you and have you be attracted to him; not a chubby chaser, not a creep, and not an abuser? 

It was impossible. Hopeless.  

“If you’re comfortable, tell me more about what you found,” he said.

You took your mind off of your dream mystery man. When the fuck was it going to be your turn? 

You scanned your journal once more, noting the sensations about actually living inside your body. “I think when I feel an orgasm approaching, I get scared. And that could be part of why I’m blocking it, but even when I’m alone, I don’t know what it feels like. Or…”

“Or…?” Dr. Richmond prompted. 

You grimaced. Fuck, this was so hard to put into words. Too hard to expose yourself like this. But did you want to reach your sixties, seventies, never having a true orgasm? Never finding your way to actual release? 

“Or, there’s no way to control the orgasm,” you said.

Dr. Richmond nodded. “The goal isn’t to control it, you know,” he said. 

“I know!” You groaned and stood up. You thought better on your feet. Or maybe when you had something to do, you were better able to regulate the jumble of emotions inside of you. No wonder your emotions were all over the place. You spent too long disassociating, too long in your mind and not enough in your body. 

“What benefit do you get from being in control all the time?” The scratch of his pen on the notebook drew your attention to him. To his pretty face, dark eyelashes, and push lips. You watched as he wrote in his notebook. Watched the lines and planes of his gorgeous face. His short curled afro. 

“If I’m in control, if I never look weak or stupid or incompetent, then I win. I win at life. And all my bullies, from school to home are all wrong. There’s nothing wrong with me because I know what to do. I know what to say. I’m not an alien,” you said, taking a deep breath at the revelation.

Whatever your insurance company was paying him, they needed to double it. You admitted things you never had in the past. Your previous therapists attacked your problem sex first, focusing on different methods you could try. Some wanted you to describe, in detail, whatever you did to get yourself off. Safe to say they weren’t practicing ever again. 

“Do you believe there’s something wrong with you?” He asked. He leaned back in his seat, giving you an unflinching stare. His face gave away nothing, revealed nothing, as you thought through his question. 

“All the fucking time. Why else do friends keep leaving me? Or guys don’t want me? Or my mom is…my mom,” you said. 

“Have you considered that you aren’t the problem?” He asked.

“How could I not be? I’m the only common denominator,” you said. You flopped back onto the couch but it wasn’t that soft. It thudded under your weight and you took a deep breath. Fuck, you wanted to cry. Tears pricked your eyes, turning them hot and itchy. You refused to cry in front of this man. 

This strange, quiet man who seemed to read you like one of the many books on his bookshelf. No wonder he had so many degrees. He could drag a full confession from a mute. 

“That may be true. But, bear with me, consider that you aren’t the problem. If you take yourself out of the equation, what are you left with?” He asked. He leaned forward on his desk and the sudden intensity of the question made your mind blank.

You had…nothing. No explanation, no back up. You were used to making yourself the problem. The issue had to be you. If it wasn’t you…

You shrugged your shoulders and looked away from him. The silence stretched on, so quiet you could hear the quiet tick of the clock on the wall. 

“Don’t shy away now, dig into it. If it’s not you, then…?” Dr. Richmond prompted. 

The question only seemed to make you clamp up. Your tongue swelled. Your throat constricted. If it wasn’t you, then what? Everyone was incapable of giving you what you wanted? Everyone just had an agenda against you? Please, that was narcissistic as hell. 

Dr. Richmond stood up from his desk and took off his glasses. He pulled out a drawer and retrieved a glass cleaner cloth. He cleaned his glasses and walked around the front of his desk.

“Consider, for a moment, that other people have deficiencies as well. That people congregate in groups because biologically, it’s safer. We seek groups to be in and when we can’t find one, we tend to think that we’re the problem. That we are outcasts, getting left out to defend ourselves. But all that means is that we haven’t found our group yet. You’re trying to fit a round peg into a square hole. You don’t belong with the squares, so no, you won’t fit in with them. 

“The same goes for sex. Everybody has their preferences. People have their kinks, their needs. When those needs aren’t meant, society teaches us to look at our own deficiencies rather than someone else’s. Perhaps the man you need sexually is far different from the men you take to bed,” he said. He waved around his glasses as he spoke, drawing attention to his massive hands. 

Seriously, they were huge. Like two lion paws that could strike down someone with one hit. He held his glasses by the frame, waving it around delicately as he spoke. You were still paying attention to his words, but fuck…he was unreal. 

“But how do I find the man that I need sexually?” You asked.

Terry

Terry inwardly groaned as you asked him that. Plenty of suggestions came to mind, each too crass to suggest. How could he tell you to go into another man’s arms? How could he send you to another man to unleash that hidden hellcat within you and he wouldn’t get to experience it? 

He needed to end this. End this before it even began. He placed his glasses back on his face and crossed a line that he never thought he would. “I think we have more work to do to adjust the way you think about sex before we get into how you attract what you’re seeking. In fact, I’d suggest you abstain from sex until we get deeper into this,” he said.

“Abstain?” You snorted and he fought a smile. Your face showed absolute disgust, like the mere thought was abhorrent. 

“Abstain. From what you’ve told me and what’s in your file, you jumped from overcoming your initial thoughts and reluctance about sex right to jumping into bed. Without really, truly exploring yourself first. Kids explore their bodies all the time right? They grow conscious of themselves and start thinking about hey, my equipment is different from someone else’s equipment,” he said.

You couldn’t help but giggle and it caused him to smirk in return. Yes, it was silly. Talking about sex was silly. But it was true. “And as you start to notice people that you’re attracted to, you start to grow conscious of hormones in your system. Brain chemistry. All the fun stuff that goes into attraction. You start to touch yourself more, explore your preferences through porn or books or experimentation.”

You cringed when he brought up experimentation. He tilted his head. “Did you go through an experimentation phase?” He asked.

You closed your eyes and sighed as if it were the last question you wanted to answer. You completely fascinated him. He had no idea what would come out of your mouth next. How you would respond to certain questions or ideas. 

He snuck a glance at the clock, he was nearing the end of the session. He flexed his jaw. This was so damn irritating. By the time you were willing to open up, it was time to end it. He wished he could carve out a month of sessions to get you to lower your defenses and let him inside. 

“No? I grew up in the wrong generation. All everyone thought about was sex and while I did too, no one was checking for the fat Black nerds unless it was a prank. And I saw everything as a prank. I was always getting pointed at, made fun of, stared at. Jesus, being exposed fucking sucks! So, no, I didn’t experiment. There was no one to fucking experiment with. 

“And it wasn’t like I could go ten feet from my mom without her up my ass about where I was going. Claiming she just didn’t want me to get snatched when all she really wanted was just to control me. To not let me end up like her. Young and pregnant,” you practically yelled, spewing way more vitriol than he expected.

He figured it was a sore spot for you by the way you grimaced, but he hadn’t been expecting…that. Again, he balled his fists thinking of every person that ever let you down. Every person that was supposed to uplift you, guide you, help you, all dropped the ball in teaching you about self love.

Every experience every kid was supposed to have was denied to you. Instead of being asked out with interest, with sincerity, boys treated it like a prank. He was wild in his youth, he wasn’t always nice to people, or he went through life like a little gremlin. But he liked to think he mellowed somewhat in high school. Treating everyone with respect. From the nerds to the jocks. He didn’t know what not trusting people’s words felt like. Like everything that someone said came laced with poisoned barbs ready to sting. 

“This is so fucking stupid,” you whispered. Your lip trembled but no tears fell down your face. 

Fuck, even now you were trying to hold everything in. Control a natural response to something painful. “When was the last time you cried?” Terry asked.

You stood up and snatched your purse and journal from the couch. “Session’s up, right?” You asked. You avoided looking at him as you rushed to the exit. The faux glass door clanged against the wall as you threw open the door and left, steps echoing on the linoleum flooring. 

He stared at the door as it lazily swung back and he wondered. And he pondered. 

Wheww, need more? The Secret Terry Richmond Files | Part 1

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[billybutcherrtrash]

Throne

CW: oral (f) and fingers

You and Spencer are friends who attended at party for a mutual friend and find you have an interesting shared book fantasy.

It had been several hours since you’d arrived at the party for a mutual friend. Reid had been cautiously watching you as you talked to everyone and gave them a small amount of your time. Every so often your gazes would meet and you’d exchange a smile from a distance. Although you’d greeted him when he walked in, you’d been rushed away my another friend for some kind of emergency. Every guy you talked to made Reid anxious. He hated the idea of you walking out of this place with someone else. Anyone else but him. Finally you made your way over to him, sitting down beside him and smiling.

“Welcome back”. Spencer said as you took a sip of your drink.

“Thanks. It’s been very hectic. You’d think for a going away party it would be more fun. Instead I’m chasing down my drunk friends.” You sighed.

“Yeah, I think I saw one of my drunk friends fall off the bar earlier.” He laughed.

“I saw that. I think we’re the only two here that aren’t drinking.”

“I like to be in control of myself. I drink occasionally but in this atmosphere I don’t think it’s wise.”

“I agree. To much going on and I’m already over stimulated”

“Glad I’m not the only one.” He nodded.

You tucked your hair behind your ears and shifted closer to him. “I’m really happy you came.”

Spencer’s eyes lit up, “I’m glad too. I’ll admit I was on the fence until I heard you’d be coming too.”

“Really?”

He nodded, “Yeah. This isn’t my thing. Bars. Or people.”

“I would much rather be at home reading. I hate all this.” You shrugged.

“Oh, that’s reminds me I started reading this book about ancient erotica and I think -“

At that you held up your hand to stop him,“Did you just say erotica?”

Spencer nodded, “Yeah, but not in the way you’re thinking of pornography. It’s rather tasteful compared to today’s idea of erotica. I’ve read a few of what is considered erotic today and I think it’s just porn on paper.”

You stared at him for a long moment. His brown eyes stared back anticipating your response.

“Porn on paper is called smut now.” You smirked.

“Yes, and it is just sexually charged writing. Ancient erotica is art. Paintings and images that are tastefully done.” Reid explained.

“I guess my bookshelf is filled with porn then.” You laughed softly.

“You read…smut?” He bit his lip.

Suddenly you felt hot. Did the temperature go up? You’d just admitted you had read spicy books.

“I-wel-…I mean…I have other kinds of books too.” You stammered. “I have biographies and nonfiction also. Fantasy.”

Spencer was enjoying watching you squirm. You were flustered now. He could see trying to save whatever semblance of a normal conversation there was left.

“Fantasy? What kind of fantasy?” He asked.

“No sexual fantasy…I have Fourth Wing. Have you read it?”

“Dragons and thunder…I have read it and its sequel.” Reid nodded. “But may I ask…how you felt about the throne scene?”

He was torturing you now. He watched as your eyes went wide and your breathing halted just enough to notice.

“I…uh…Spence…you’re doing this on purpose.” You said softly.

“Am I? I’m just curious.”

You raised an eyebrow, “Are you?”

“Very…” He nodded.

He watched you bite your lip. The conversation had taken a sharp turn and now you were staring at each other, both quiet. You wished you knew what he was thinking about.

“Do you want to get out of here?” Spencer finally asked.

“Yes”. You agreed.

He stood and held out his hand for you. You took it and slipped out of your seat, following him out the door. You felt anxious as you walked out into the cold air, cautiously looking up at him.

“Did you drive?” He asked, looking back.

“No…I came with (your mutual friend’s name).”

“You should probably tell her you’re leaving.” Spencer smirked.

“I can text her.” You blushed a little as you arrived at Spencer’s car.

You turned to face him as he opened the door for you. It was only now that you realized he was so much taller than you. All the time working with him at the university and you’d never noticed. He stepped closer and slid a hand around your waist.

“Can I kiss you?” Spencer asked.

Your brained seemed to short circuit, unable to form words, so you nodded almost too enthusiastically. Spencer leaned down and cupped your face, kissing you gently. The feel of his mouth on yours was dizzying. You weren’t drunk but you felt like it. He pulled you a little closer and you welcomed the feel of his body. After a few long moments he pulled back leaving you aching his touch. He gazed at you, stroking your cheek gently.

“Still want to go home with me?” He asked.

“Yes” Was all you could managed, still seeing stars.

Spencer helped you in the car before closing the door and running to the other side. You watched him get in and start the car.

“Don’t forget to text (your friend’s name).”

“Oh, right.” You reached for your phone and sent a quick text letting them know you’d found a ride.

They sent a reply with eggplant emoji’s and water droplets. Thank God it was dark because your cheeks were red at the idea of them knowing who you’d left with. The man you’d confided in her to having a crush on from the minute he’d walked into your life. As he drove you pulled your sleeves over your hands and fidgeted with them anxiously. You couldn’t have possibly expected him to not notice. He reached over and laced his fingers with yours.

“You play with your clothes when you’re nervous.” Spencer said, glancing at your hands.

Of course he’d noticed. The many meetings you’d sat in together, the times you’d been in the elevator together alone, the time he’d come to you asking for your opinion on a case, he’d seen it every time he was near you. You looked up as you felt the car slow to a stop. He put the car in park and you both sat for a moment. Finally your eyes met his. He gave you a soft smile.

“Do you still want to come inside?” Spencer asked.

“I do.” You answered.

He nodded and got out of the car, coming around to open your door and helped you out. Her nerves were started to become more noticeable. You didn’t do this. You never went home with guys. Especially not guys you worked with. Especially not anyone with an IQ of 187 and read books on ancient erotica. Spencer took your hand and led you into his building. Once in the elevator you chewed at your lip, your fingers linked with his as he pressed the button to his floor.

“Are you okay?” Spencer asked, reaching up to brush your hair behind your ear.

“Spence…you need checking on me. I’m fine. I’m sure. I promise.” You said, standing on your toes to kiss him.

He cupped your neck, returning the kiss. He was gentle and soft. You could only hope he maintained that once you were in his apartment. The elevator dings upon arriving at his floor. He pulled away reluctantly and you stepped off, making your way to his front door.

“I’m slightly surprised we aren’t stumbling down your hallway, too impatient to get inside.” You joked.

Spencer slid his key in the door, “We could have been but you deserve more respect than me just trying to fuck you.”

Your jaw dropped, surprised. “Spencer Reid said fuck!” You smirked.

“I’ve been known to swear on occasion.” He replied, letting you inside.

You stepped inside the apartment, looking around. He closed the door and locked it.

“So…what now?” He asked, stepping closer to you.

“Spence…we both know what’s going to happen…but can we pretend for five seconds that you’re not thinking about undressing me and be making obscene sounds shortly thereafter?” You asked, taking his hand.

“Well now that you’ve put that image in my head…it’s going to be hard not to.” He smirked.

“You mentioned you had books. I want to see the collection.”

“The lady gets what the lady wants.” He replied, leading you to his bookshelf.

It seemed to overflow with classic literature in many languages. You looked at the titles, a few familiar and many you’d never seen or heard of. Then your eyes caught a familiar gold cover. You smirked and pulled out Fourth Wing.

“You really did read it.” You smirked.

“You and Penelope wouldn’t shut up about it, I was curious what had you so worked up. It’s not my thing but it peaked my interest.” He replied. “Especially chapter 48 in Iron Flame.”

You froze, knowing exactly what he was referring to. He leaned in close, his breath hot on your skin.

“My house. My chair. My woman.” He whispered.

You looked up at him, your mouth suddenly dry. You had forgotten he’d mentioned the throne room scene.

“You…um…you know the exact chapter.” You stammered.

He smirked down at you. “Of course I do. You never told me how you felt about it.”

“I mean…obviously it’s hot.” You turned to face him. “What woman doesn’t want a man worshipping her on his knees on a throne.”

Spencer raised an eyebrow. “Is that what you want?”

“Do you have a throne?” You asked.

“Not quite a throne, but I definitely have a chair we can pretend is a thrown.”

You licked your lips as you felt your pulse rising. You felt hot again. You knew why you’d come to his apartment and now was the time you stopped pretending it was innocent.

“Show me.”

Spencer gave a soft smile and led you to his room. It was neat, bed made and everything orderly. Your eyes fell upon a gorgeous leather chair near the window. It was the perfect reading chair, but tonight it was going to be a throne for him to worship you on. He walked you over and you admired it. You could see it was tall enough that your feet might dangle if you sat down, and the leather was soft. God forbid you dig your nails into it and mark the leather.

“Are you sure?” Spencer asked from behind you.

You felt his hands sliding up your arms, stroking your biceps gently. His breath was hot on your neck as you leaned back into him.

“Yes.” You said, eyes closing when he kissed your neck.

“Then sit down.”

You swallowed anxiously, turning to face him before sitting down. You could have sworn his eyes darkened just a bit as he moved to the floor. Surprisingly the chair was the perfect height for you to be face to face. You pulled him against you and kissed him. His hands ran through your hair and down your shoulders. You knew exactly want was coming. He pulled away and removed your shoes. As his hands moved to your jeans you feel your pulse racing and your breathing quicken. He pulls you to the edge of the chair and tugs them down your legs. The air conditioning sends goosebumps over your skin as Spencer looks up at you. His eyes met yours and you forgot to breathe. He didn’t look away as you placed kisses on your legs, creeping higher and higher up your thigh.

“You’re so gorgeous.” He said, stroking your opposite thigh. “God, you’re perfect.”

You bit your lip, having trouble forming words. All you wanted was for him to devour and absolutely worship you. His hand slid over your hips and to the top of your underwear. The second they were gone you knew you’d never be able to recover. You ached for him. Slowly he slid them down and you watched him carefully. Spencer’s eyes darkened even more at the sight of you bare before him. He could see the moisture pooling at your core and he was instantly rock hard.

“Last time…you want this?” He asked.

“Last time, yes.” You panted, “Please, God, just touch me.”

Begging wasn’t something you’d thought you’d be doing but you were desperate. He nodded, moving one leg to sit over the arm of the chair and the other over his shoulder. You nearly came as his tongue slid through your wet folds. You let out a loud gasp, your head falling back against the back of the chair. He swirled around your clit, toying with it gently.

“Spencer, fuck!” You moaned, nails digging into the leather.

He smiled as he continued his actions, lapping up your juices. His hands held you firmly in place and you squirmed under his.

“Don’t stop, please.” You whimpered.

Spencer watched you coming undone, enjoying every second of it. Watching your breathing catch when he licked your clit. You moaned even louder when he slid a finger into you. It was nearly enough to finish you. Your hand moved to his hair and you tugged at it, causing him to groan against you. The vibrations only added to the pleasure. He added another finger, pushing you closer to the edge.

“Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck…” You panted, so close to cumming.

Spencer felt you clench around his fingers and he moved them faster. His tongue massaged your delicate folds until finally you couldnt hold on.

“Spence, oh, fuck…” You whimpered before coming undone.

He smiled, working you through it. Finally you could breathe again and you looked down at him. He was just watching you, stroking your thigh gently.

“You okay?” He asked.

“More than okay.” You blushed as you sat up.

“How was it?”

“It rivaled all the fantasies I had about being worshipped in a thrown”. You admitted.

[aychama]

Bearer of the Red Crown's Birthday

"These pompous assholes." Narinder opened the door to escape outside and take a breather.

"They were never taught to shut the hell up were they?" He rubbed his temples and wondered why was their birthday gift to him was a headeache.

The calm but obnoxiously loud people inside the greathall had gathered to congradulate the King's birthday. Of course it was a big event and many of the nobles were attending. Some even travveled from the other kingdoms.

But to Narinder it was just a nuisance, just like how it was every year.

They had gathered to make connections, threaten eachother covertly or simply suck up to Narinder. He had to put up with these people and act like they wouldn't turn on him with the twirl of any one of his siblings finger.

He was just looking for a place to hide now but it seemed his hiding place was occupied by a slouched figure.

"Lambert?" Narinder noticed the figure in the corner next to the flower bushes.

"BAH!" They shout out a short bleat and turned towards him. Their funny noise and freaked out face was like a cold fresh water being splashed on Narinder's hot and aching head.

"My King! Please, you need to stop sneaking up on me..." Lambert sighed and got up.

Were they getting away from people too? That wasn't good. He had specifically told them to use this oppurtunity to make connections so they could have people helping them with their new lands troubles.

Just as he was about to start his lecture he noticed the neatly folded fabric in Lambert's hands.

"Is this..." he saw the little bow it was wrapped with.

A gift.

Lambert looked at the item in their hands, hesitated a little and presented it towards him.

"For you, yes."Narinder's fingers brushed Lambert's as he took it and started examining it. It was a red and white scarf.

"Aym and Baal said that you get cold easily so... I was actually going to knit it myself but it was way harder to do than I thought it would be. Haha..." They let out a defeated sigh hidden with a tired smile.

"I-it's not an expensive item I know but I-"

"It's made out of your wool." Narinder cut them off as he took off the bow and ran his fingers through the fabric. It was so, oh so soft. He didn't even have to bring his nose closer to it to know it smell like them.

"You can tell?" Lambert's face looked horrified, their smile dropping down as they looked up at him.

They suddenly reached out towards the scarf and started to pull it out of Narinder's hands.

"That's just weird isn't it? I-I knew it would be weird argh stupid Berith-"

"Wh- No!"Narinder did not let go of the scarf and it stretched between the two."Lambert no it's not weird." He looked at them hoping he sounded genuine.

"It's no secret that I like wool and this is perfect." Lambert stopped pulling and looked at Narinder, unsure.

He had gotten many presents today. So many that he lost count. So many things that he did not care. Jewelry, expensive items, some magical crystals, decorative weapons. Presents that were given to a King so that they wouldn't lose face or even worse, so that the noble families could look at eachother and say 'Look at how rich I am. The King surely likes me more than all of you so I can use him to scare you and get my way'. It was all so obvious and so shallow that he thought the amount of jewelry and necklaces were going to stuf his throat so much that he could drown without water.

But this,

This was from Lambert.

And it didn't have any underlying intentions.

Narinder slowly pulled the scarf from Lambert's hesitant hands.

"I remember reading a book when I was young."

He wrapped the scarf around his neck.

"It was about the culture of our folk."

He adjusted the scarf and both ends hung over his shoulders lovingly.

"And I remember reading that sheep-folk would give eachother gifts made out of their own wool to show their appreciation for eachother." He adjusted the scarf and looked at them to see the curiosity color their pretty face.

"Really?" Lambert asked and he nodded softly.

Narinder knew that Lambert wasn't taught of their own culture. It was...sad... but not unexpected. There wasn't really any sheep-folk in the 5 kingdoms other than them.

To think Shamura's old books he randomly decided to read would have a lot about sheep-folk in them. Too bad that wretched younger brother of his burnt down Shamura's library just because he was jealous Shamura would read books with Narinder... Narinder wishes that Shamura would have killed Leshy right then and there but they didn't. Soft hearted fool who went easy on all of their siblings but not on their enemies. And that included Narinder too.

Narinder shook his head to get rid of the hatred starting to boil up in his gut and focused on the scarf and Lambert. Their smell and their soft wool was all around him, quickly calming him down as he lowered his head to bury the bottom half of his face into the scarf.

He heard the softest giggle.

"You look silly."

Narinder opened his eyes, he didn't even know when he had closed them, and looked at Lambert.

They were smiling so soft and warmly at him. His throat clogged up again but he wasn't feeling bad this time.

"It's clashing with the rest of the jewelry badly."

He couldn't take his eyes off of Lambert's smile as they talked.

He thanked God that he always had his veil because he didn't think he could explain why he was looking at Lambert's smile like it was the only thing in the world.

"And it looks funny with your fancy clothes. Maybe I should have told Berith to make it look more expensive." Lambert laughed. If he could eat their voice he bet it would taste like fluffy candy, he thought.

The two heard some people talking about where the king has gone from inside and Narinder sighed.

Lambert reached towards Narinder's neck and tugged at the scarf.

"You need to go back in right? You can't just look like this in front of everyone. I'll put it next to the pile of gifts-"

He grabbed their arm and stopped them from taking the scarf.

"No." He said firmly.

"But-"

"Who said I would be going in alone? I remember telling a certain someone that they need to make connections because their poor decisions while ruling their own land had left them in a troubling state." He turned the conversation towards Lambert seemlessly to cover up whatever he was feeling right now.

"A-ah that! I have a little bit of a-no actually a big headache from talking with so many- soooo many people yknow?" Lambert stumbled over their words.

Narinder let the silence fall between them to show them he did not believe them.

"Let's go. I suppose I have to be the one to intruduce you to people." Narinder pulled Lambert by the arm that he had grabbed and walked towards the door.

"I'm- My King! You shouldn''t- you don't need to pull me!"

[connorsui]

“I trust you…I promise you that I trust you, and nothing will come in the way of that…but you can’t tell me this isn’t ridiculous, right?”

You stand in the middle of your snowy driveway, gazing with a mix of exasperation and amusement at Johnny and your twin sons as they create a battlefield out of the morning’s snowfall-- Instead of the simple snowmen you might have imagined, the boys are busy crafting a fortress, with underground paths, tall mounds as shields, and small stockpiles of snowballs for their so called ... “ammunition.”

You’d pictured the morning so differently: hot chocolate by the fire, maybe a bit of decorating? or Johnny sharing tame, kid-friendly stories from his time in the service—with the casual violence out of the way. But instead, here you are, cup of coffee warming one hand, the other resting on your hip as you watch Johnny instruct the boys in how to "properly" make a shield.

“Ohh, c’mon, lovie,” Johnny calls out, dusting the snow from his gloves with a playful shake of his head, “Let the lads enjoy themselves a bit, eh?” He straightens up, strides over to you, and presses a kiss to your cheek. The cold on his lips contrasts sharply with the warmth of his smile, and you feel yourself smiling back, twirling your coffee idly in the mug.

Johnny steps behind you, wrapping his arms securely around your waist, resting his chin atop your head. “I meant it when I said I wanted to spend every second with the boys,” he murmurs softly. “Been too long without ‘em, you know?”

“Oh, I know you said that,” you chuckle, a warm puff of air slipping into the crisp winter morning. “Don’t think I forgot so quickly... But taking on our boys in an early morning little war wasn’t exactly what I had in mind when you promised ‘quality time,’ Johnny.”

He laughs, his deep chuckle vibrating against you. But before he can reply, one of the twins rushes over, his cheeks flushed with excitement, snowflakes clinging to his coat.

“Mum! Mummy! Look! We did it!” He points eagerly to their snow fortress, an impressive structure for something built by two kids and their overly enthusiastic dad.

The other twin, standing guard behind a snowy barricade, grins mischievously before launching a snowball toward his brother. It narrowly misses, skimming past you, and you instinctively step back, laughing as you bump into Johnny’s chest.

“Oi! Careful with yer aim,” Johnny calls out, unable to hide the pride in his voice. He lets you go and grins at the boys. “Ye want to join me inside for a while, love?” he asks, lowering his voice, a playful warmth in his tone. “I’ll make you somethin’ nice, your favorite.”

“Hmmm,” you hum in mock consideration, pretending to think it over. Finally, you give a quick nod, and the two of you make your way back to the kitchen, where you begin preparing a warm breakfast for the boys. The house feels cozy, the warmth from the stove and the sound of laughter just outside filling it with a sense of peace that feels almost too perfect to be real.

As you look out the kitchen window, you see the twins giggling, a flurry of snowballs passing between them. One boy dives behind a mound, trying to evade the other’s shot, only to trip and collapse in a heap of laughter and snow. You watch, smiling to yourself, feeling that rare, unfiltered happiness that fills every corner of your heart.

“What’re ye thinkin’, hmm?” Johnny asks, catching the look on your face as he leans against the counter, his gaze soft.

You blink, as if just waking from a daydream. “What? Nothing… Just happy, is all.”

Johnny raises an eyebrow, the hint of a smile playing on his lips. “Sure about that?”

“What makes you think I’m not?”

“Oh, nothin’,” he teases, feigning innocence. “Just wonderin’.”

You lean back against the counter, eyes drifting again to the scene outside. “This is everything I could’ve ever wanted with you, Johnny. I remember imagining this life with you back then, maybe one little one in tow… but now, with two boys, and you… it almost feels ...dream-like,... you know?”

He slides closer to you, his hand resting over yours. “No, darlin’. I don’t know,” he says softly, his eyes meeting yours with that familiar, grounded warmth. “Because this here? It’s all real. Me, the house, our boys… us.” He gestures around as if to make his point clear. “This is it. All of it’s real.”

A smile spreads across your face as you meet his gaze, unable to hold back. Leaning up, you place a soft kiss on his lips, savoring the moment, the crisp air still lingering on his skin.

“And ye know what else could be real right about now?” he murmurs, a glint of mischief in his eye.

“Oh, and what would that be?”

“Leaving the kids with yer mum while we take apart that new lovely present you left out for me.”

You gasp, feeling a blush creep up your cheeks. “Johnny! Don’t tell me you’ve already seen it?”

He smirks, tapping the side of his head. “Oh, don’t think I didn’t spot it, all prettily wrapped with a bow.”

Lowering your voice, you whisper, “That was for later!”

“How much later?” he teases, a mischievous sparkle in his eye that sends your pulse racing.

You glance away, hiding a grin, cheeks warm as you try to suppress the smile tugging at your lips.

Johnny lets out a laugh, his deep voice filling the cozy kitchen. But before you can respond, the boys come bounding in, their noses red from the cold, eyes wide with excitement.

“Mum! Mum! Can you make our favorite breakfast?” they ask in unison, looking up at you with hopeful smiles.

You sigh playfully, shaking off the blush that had crept up your neck, and nod. “Alright, alright. I’ll call you back when it’s ready!”

With twin shouts of “mmkay!” they scamper back outside, their laughter echoing through the yard as they dive back into their snowball war.

Johnny watches you, a familiar, mischievous smile still on his face. “Well?”

You tilt your head, chuckling, “I'll call her.."

A laugh escapes him, and he pulls you close, pressing a tender kiss to your cheek. As you continue with breakfast, he stays by your side, keeping an eye on the boys through the window. You realize that this—Johnny beside you, the kids laughing outside, the warmth of your home wrapping around you—is the happiest you’ve ever felt.

[ssentimentals]

your drabbles are SO much fun! could you do wonwoo telling you suggestive prompt #6?

awww hehe, thank you for saying so! it's very fun for me to write them too :') 💜 thank you for requesting, hopefully you will like it!

suggestive prompt '...or we can just get naked?'

'we don't even have spare clothes.'

wonwoo nods at this, but you can tell that he's nowhere near giving up on his idea. in his defense - yes, water looks absolutely amazing. it's a rare windless day in cyprus and all days of your work trip it's been raining, preventing everyone from enjoying little dip in the sea. but today weather's been so pleasant and smooth glide of the sea looks way too inviting under the stars.

'our coworkers can come too,' you try with another excuse. this one is solid and you hope it'll work.

'everyone is drunk and went home,' wonwoo argues. 'we literally watched them hop on the taxis.'

'they can come back!' it's a weak reply, but it's everything you can tell him.

wonwoo arches his eyebrow and there's so much challenge in his eyes that you know you won't be able to back out, he always managed to trap you with that gaze. slowly, holding eye contact with you, wonwoo goes closer to the sea until waves don't tickle his toes.

'you want to get your clothes wet?' you ask, going after like he's got some magnet on you. 'we can't, wonwoo. how will we then return to the hotel? you want all our coworkers to see us like that?'

wonwoo hums in understanding. there's a pregnant pause in which only soothing sounds of waves can be heard and then: '...or we can just get naked?'

you blink at him. you surely heard wrong, right? 'what?' you ask, hating the way your voice cracks. 'are you insane?'

he is. he is, because looking right into your eyes, wonwoo starts pulling off his linen jacket. there's an unspoken dare in his gaze, which you wisely choose to ignore for now because no way he's actually going to do it. you two been dancing around each other for a while, but surely this is not how he's planning to crack the tension, right? 'wonwoo,' you call, when he gets rid of his t-shirt next. 'you can't be serious.'

'oh, but i'm always serious.' he deflects, grinning. 'some even call me boring and too serious.'

his hands are on his belt and you swallow. god, is this really happening? wonwoo looks quite irressistible right now, his boyish charm on full display in his wide grin and relaxed stance. it's such a stark contrast to how you usually see him at work that it's hard to look away. 'woo-'

'join me.' he asks, unzipping his jeans. his eyes never leave yours and it makes something ignite in the lower pit of your stomach. 'you know you want to.'

you take a deep breath. count till three. then take one more deep breath. 'this is crazy,' you state and wonwoo laughs loudly, when you throw your blazer on the sand. 'this is crazy.'

he's standing in front of you in his underwear, when yuo pull off your sneakers and socks. you're in a dress and it takes only one motion to take it off. wonwoo's eyes linger on you, leaving a hot trail, but then he turns, giving you some semblance of modesty. 'i'm going. i'll be waiting for you there.'

and maybe it's the way he said it - with no doubt that you will join him - that tips the scale to another side. with a huff, you take off your dress and rush to the sea in your underwear, squealing at how cold water is. wonwoo turns around and laughs, comes at you and opens his arms, inviting you and- and it'd take a stronger woman to deny this request. you fall into his arms with a shy giggle, letting sea witness the beginning of your love story.

a/n: request your own here! <3 - nini

[dolliels]

third times the charm.

azul x reader

synopsis: azul likes you. and he’s been trying to ask you out for a while.

a/n: okay guys im not dead wtf. posting this fic to prove i didn’t kms 💀💀

azul had only three goals in mind: prove his bullies wrong, become rich and die rich.

his love life was the least of his worries. he’d probably swoon over some wealthy girl and marry her for connections. done deal. nothing much to think about.

azul thought about the huge house he’ll eventually own. he even has the measurements and everything down in his head.

everything would be at the grasp of his hands. no children, absolutely not. everything would be perfectly spread out just for him. he’d die on his deathbed with a huge grin on his face, knowing he’d only get the best even after he has left the world of the living. perfect.

so sometimes, he’d find himself wondering why he would be in a dazed state, daydreaming about a modest, happy future with you.

everything was laid out. his entire future was laid out. then suddenly, you decided to waltz into his life, and all he thinks about is you. waking up, he’s wondering if you’re sleeping in. or when he’s eating, he’d be trying to guess what you’d be buying to see if he actually knows your tastes. or during work, gazing around mostro lounge, seeing if you’d decided to take a visit to his beloved café.

ugh, it infuriated him.

sometimes, it would go as far as thoughts of marriage, which completely ruined him.

see, the thing is, he hasn't even asked you out. you and azul were not at all close intimately in any way. friends? sure. but not close like that.

so why was his mind leaping so far? did he really want to have such a commitment with you? after all these years of obsessing over his future?

he wanted to live such a luxurious life of power and money. so everything he’s done to build all the way up here seems to tumble down when in his head, azul seemed to feel much happier in a modest life with you. he felt his heart warm at the thought of being beside you even in his death.

he hasn’t daydreamed this much since middle school, when he’s had violent thoughts about ruining anyone who’s bullied him.

so, after much contemplation, he decided to confess.

the first time, he decided it was going to be simple. he was gonna hand you a bouquet of flowers afterschool, and ask if he could court you. simple enough, right? he’s look clean and awesome.

but when the time finally arrived, he found himself to have cold feet.

yes, he’d have the comfort of knowing he would have composure, but what if you reject him? then can he keep going on with the calm, collected manner? would you think a simple bouquet of flowers would be too little?

fortunately for you, you ended up having a pretty vase of flowers. unfortunately for azul, you wouldn’t know who it came from.

the second time, azul went on full glam.

it’s be an incredibly romantic setting. It's just you and azul, chatting away after hours of mostro lunge and you’d fall right into his trap of charms, and just when you’re feeling him, he’d confess. so while you have a good impression of him, would you receive a confession from him.

fancy food, calm, quiet setting.

azul was so sure he’d be able to do this that he even let jade and floyd intervene and help out.

yet when you and azul were talking, he found himself stuttering, quite a hot mess.

although you seemed quite confused and calm, azul was in a nervous state.

he’d start overthinking again, his head wandering off to merry land, thinking about the possible results of this confession. perhaps this was too excessive? Maybe the simple bouquet of flowers from before would’ve been better. you seemed to have enjoyed them.

no! azul already got this far, he has to do this!

“so, uhm… prefect…” azul behind, breathing in deeply.

you turned to look, and blinked at him. “yeah?”

…fuck.

it was like you wanted him to fail, batting your eyelashes (you literally just blinked) and looking so cute in front of him (you just inhaled a shit ton of free food)

“a-ah… is there anything else you want? I’m feeling quite generous.”

azul wanted to sprint out. he messed up again! It seems that the words “i like you” weren’t coming out of his mouth anytime soon.

you frowned. “really? you really don’t have it out for me?”

azul shook his head, and smiled. “you can trust me.”

you shrugged. “oh well. whatever debt I have to pay will be something future me can deal with.” you flapped the menu open.

It took quite a bit of convincing for the twins to drag you here, since you were suspicious as to why azul wanted to suddenly meet you, offering free food out of nowhere. azul was wasting all of it.

the twins will never let him see the end of it.

…and never seeing the end of it was he right.

even after such a mess up, predictably, the twins kept teasing azul about it. they’d even use it against him sometimes.

“ah…you’re making us do all of this when you helped you prepare a confession for the prefect and you didn’t even confess… and wasted our time…sigh….”

it was horrible down here with jade and floyd.

if he… possibly tried confessing to you again… would they stop?

although it seemed azul was in the dumps of announcing his love for you, it made him think about it again. freedom… from the twins… is this what heaven is like?

it wasn’t like azul completely stopped thinking of you, in fact, you appeared in his thoughts even more now, which seemed impossible already but who’s to tell?

you slowly consumed his mind, it drove azul insane. what’s even worse is that you’re completely blind to it, so he can’t even go to you for comfort from this madness.

it’s technically your fault, and also not your fault at the same time!

the days went by, and azul couldn’t tolerate it any longer.

yes, he wanted to appear as awesome and composed as he could in front of you, but you were driving him nuts without trying— azul just liked you so much. He couldn’t just hold inside him, of course he would go mad!

and anyways, third times the charm, right?

however, for the unlucky octopus, he just can’t seemed to find the right time. you were constantly surrounded by people, and if you were, for the rare occasion, alone, azul would freeze up at the unexpected chance.

this crush on you got even worse as well, turning more red by the second, compared to his slight discomfort from his early days.

he was already imagining a relationship with you, embarrassingly giggling to himself like a little girl with his eyes closed in bed. it was starting to take a toll on him when his head wandered astray to thoughts of marriage… it was like the world slapped him in the face as if to say hey! your life plans are totally going down the drain because you are pathetically in love!

he's spent many days mumbling to himself like crazy. stuck to be a paranoid businessman, considering every possibility and outcome he might receive if he ever told you his feelings, especially if you were to reject him. his eyes burned from being unable to sleep at night from overthinking and the stacks of papers he had to get through because he lost track of his focus thinking of you.

now you were ruining his life.

and what were you doing? nothing.

it's like whenever you were bored, you decided to prance around the daises of his life; an unstoppable force, preventing azul from functioning normally.

this isn't like him.

"this isn't like you." said jade, leaning towards azul so that he could hear jade's hushed voice over the chatty crowds of the mostro lounge. "you're not still stuck on about the whole prefect thing, are you?"

azul sighed. "admittedly, i am." he took off his glasses and massaged his temple. "i have barely gotten any work done. what is wrong with me?"

jade chuckled. "why are you so worried? honestly, you should just walk up to them and ask. that's what i would do."

"i'm not you, jade" azul groaned. “I can’t just confidently stride to them and ask them out.”

“well of course you can’t!”

“ouch.”

“my apologies. let me reword that. you can’t do that because you’re not me. how about you do it in a way that doesn’t make you look so cool? after all, you’re quite the opposite of that. wouldn’t the truth be more endearing?”

still… ouch. but it wasn’t like jade was wrong. azul is, unfortunately, far from cool. Even though that is what he likes to display.

“and what if the prefect says yes after you ask them out with that mask of yours? are you going to keep pretending until they get sick of you?”

azul couldn’t reply. what could he say?

“just be normal. after all, i couldn’t stand to watch you like this after you made me and floyd do all that work and was still incapable of asking them out. do you know how difficult it was for me to drag the prefect here? uhehehehehe.” jade wiped away a fake tear.

azul just groaned and walked away.

a little frustrated, a little annoyed, his courage seemed to have broken the roof when he saw you walk in with grim, bickering about who knows what.

he thought back to his daydreams. the images of you smiling, holding hands, soft kisses in secret, his heart was not well.

he slowly dug deep into his head to take out a precious daydream of his;

nothing special,

it was you slowly mouthing the words “I. Love. You.” to him.

“prefect,” azul said, tapping your shoulder.

you gave your full attention to him, happily. “what’s up azul?”

“I like you. would you allow me to take you out on a date?”

a/n hi guys.. shoujo bf is coming im serious pls b patient w me 💀💀

[xblackkurox]

Nanami Kento breeding his wife. nsfw, mdni!

Some thoughts that keep me entertained at work lmao, so might be full of mistakes. English is not my first language and all that yk.

Couldn't stand the thought of not having any smut of this man in my page since he is the love of my life.

His cock drills into your cunt, again and again, in and out, in and out. His tip kisses your cervix with each single slam of his hips, legs folded so your knees press against your boobs.

Kento has you in the meanest matting press, big hands pressing at the back of your full thighs surely leaving red or even purple marks.

"Don't see you laughing anymore, pretty. What happened?" And no, you're not laughing, fat tears stream down your flushed cheeks instead.

"Fuck- look at that mmmphf!" He groans, narrow eyes zeroing in how his girth is being sucked in by your cunt. A ring of cum, both his and yours, on the base of his dick, each time he bottoms out it sticks messily to your folds. It's so lewd, even your mound and his pubis are stained with it.

"Hah- gonna stuff this soft tummy full of my cum, hmm? Get my pretty wife pregnant. Isn't that what you wanted?"

It had all started earlier that afternoon, while he was at work. You had attempted to pull one of your little pranks on him, sending a picture of a fake positive pregnancy test. Little did you know that your husband had been having a sever case of baby fever and that had been his last straw.

He had felt joyful, completely thrilled for becoming a dad, or that was until you sent another message. Laughing it off, saying it was just a joke.

Well, he had a mission now. He was going to put a baby inside you, so next time that positive wouldn't be a little prank of yours, but a real one.

It's been two hours since he got home from work, two hours of him pulling orgasm after orgasm out of you and himself. And still his cock was hard and twitching inside you. Hitting that spot within that made you see sparks behind your eyelids, stretching you to full capacity.

"K-kentooooo..." You whine. Hot and fresh tears spilling from your eyes, rolling down your flushed cheeks until you can taste the salty flavor on your lips. "Can't- can't take it anymore-!"

"Hmm? But you're about to cum... Lying again?" And he is right, he can see it in how your toes are curling, feel it in how you grip his cock from the inside. He knows when his wife is about to orgasm.

And just to proof his point one of his hands uncurls from your ankle. Gold and cold wedding ring caressing your folds, right above where he's pounding you. He caresses from down to up a couple times, getting the alliance stained with your juices before replacing it by his thumb. He flickers your clit, slowly but with pressure. And when you mewl he laughs.

"See? She never lies." And he's referring to your pussy. "Come on, give it to me baby- ah! You can do it- can fucking do it my love!"

That's all it takes, his raspy moany voice cooing you to cum. How could you disobey? Of course the moment those words spill his mouth you're creaming his dick again. Shaking and whimpering so adorably, making his heart flutter. Oh, he can't wait to see you all plump and round with his child.

Kento is peppering you soaked face with butterfly kisses, on your nose, on your cheeks, on your eyelids. And of course on your glossy lips. His whole weight now pinning you down on the mattress.

"There you go, so good so so sooo good for me- my wife mmmphf-!" He's gonna cum too, his hips are getting more erratic, more sloppy, more feral. "Gonna cum, my love. Gonna put my baby in you, yes? Make you my beautiful pregnant wife- fuckfuck- you're gonna look so b-beautiful... I love you sooo much-" He's ranting, praises spilling through clenched teeth as if they were curses. In between small pecks here and there.

He cums right after, stilling his body as he buries his girth to the hilt. Rope after rope of hot seed right into your womb. And of course he doesn't pull out after no, he remains inside you. Not allowing one single drop going to waste.

He's gotta breed you afterall, right?

[itsmalombra]

I don't have many time to do it, but I'll try to do some Primo Levi propaganda because I'm genuinely blaffed by this poll results lol.

What to say about Primo Levi? Jew, a leftist until his death, Holocaust survivor (thanks to beng a chemist, he was considered useful by the SS and wasn't killed as soon he arrived to Auschwitz), he condemned with decades of advance the first cases of violence from the just started Israel occupation aganst the Palestinians, having still care for the difficulties that many jews like him were experiencing in Europe. He is one of the author you have to read if you want to understand the contrast and the difference between anti-semitism and anti-sionism. The horrors he endured were the cause of hid death in 1987, possibly by suicide.

About his relationship with other italian jews who moved in Occupied Palestine/Israel but at the same time his distrust to Menachem Begin policies and latent antisionism:

Levi was clearly inspired by them, but not enough to follow their example and join his fate in the postwar period to the Zionist project in Israel. He had a complicated relationship to the country. [...] Like other Jews, Levi kept up with news from the region, especially during times of crisis. His responses to two of these crises reveal a strong attachment to Israel on a personal level but also some sharp differences with the country’s policies. His criticisms were political and generally lined up with the views of the Italian Left. They came to a head in 1982, during Israel’s incursion into Lebanon in Operation ‘Peace for Galilee’. [...] Much of public opinion in Western countries, including Italy, turned against Israel, especially following the Christian Phalange militia’s massacre of Palestinians in Sabra and Shatila in September, 1982. Levi joined his voice to the protests, signing letters urging Israel’s withdrawal and calling for Begin’s retirement from office. In turn, he himself came under criticism from prominent leaders of the Italian Jewish community, who called for communal solidarity at such a time. Fearing an intensification of hostility against Jews in Italy as a result of vehement anti-Israel and antisemitic demonstrations breaking out across Europe, they also thought it unwise for Jews to join their voices in protest against Israel, as Levi and others were doing. Levi’s Italian Jewish friends living in Israel, some of whom lost family members in the country’s War of Independence and subsequent fighting, also spoke out against him. ‘I retain a close sentimental tie with Israel,’ he confessed at the time, ‘but not with this Israel’. [source]

Another article about this important part of him is here, unfortunately is in italian.

I don’t think there is another author as representative of the Holocaust horror (and war horror in general) in Italy like Primo Levi, considering also is eminence in contemporary literature, his interviews with Philip Roth or Judith Butler, him being the namesake of various international associations against discriminations and violence like the Primo Levi Center, the raw and vivid power of his writing and poetry:

You who live safe In your warm house; You who find, come evening, Hot food and the faces of friends: Consider if this is a man Who struggles in the mud Who knows no peace Who fights for crumbs Who dies because of a No or Yes Consider if this is a woman, Nameless and hairless Without strength to remember Vacant eyes and a womb Cold like a frog in the winter: Consider the fact that this has happened: These words I suggest: Etch them on your heart When staying home and going out, Closing your eyes and rising back; Repeat them to your children: Or may your house crumble, Illness bind you And they turn their faces away from you.

If This Is a Man, Primo Levi, 1947.

To describe his importance not only in the italian, but also european and world-wide canon, it takes months and pages of space, a thing that sadly now I don't have, but if you, readed, have never heard of him, you have in front of you so much of books, essays, poetry and writing by Levi that will let you amazed by his depth of though and sensivity, but most importantly, vote now for him👆.

Italian literature tournament - Second round.

Propaganda in support of the authors is accepted, you can write it both in the tag if reblog the poll (explaining maybe that is propaganda and you want to see posted) or in the comments. Every few days it will be recollected and posted here under the cut.

Propaganda in favor of Guido Cavalcanti by @eresia-catara

May I add further propaganda for Guido: He's a noble, he disdains aristocrats, he was Florence's number one Server of Cunt, he was the city's faggot, he was heretical, he went on a random pilgrimage but interrupted it and managed to be buried in a church anyway, he had an archenemy who sent some men to murder him on said pilgrimage, he came back and tried to murder him back in plain daylight, he gave zero fucks about politics, he got exiled because he was considered a menace for the city. He SAW DANTE's poetical talent, encouraged it, shaped it, and through him the whole of italian literature. Think about it. Also they became besties until they evolved to a tormented psychosexual haunting dynamic (see break-up poem) where Dante himself actually exiled him. In the 13th century his poetry anticipates so many of the literary themes of the XXth century, going from fragmentation of the self (his is basically vivisection and dispersion of his parts), to dissociation from one's own mind and body, lack of identity, irony, desecration, his poetry is full of schizophrenic-like hallucinations, reading them is truly a trip, and yet his language is profoundly meoldic and sweet. And there's also gender-fuckery. and theater, of course, because his poems develop like a scene from a theater (adding layers to the dissociation). So really he has it all guys.

Guido Cavalcanti propaganda by @girldante

GUIDO CAVALCANTI PROPAGANDA ABBIAMO:

LA DISSOCIAZIONE SCHIZOFRENICA:

IL COMICO, IL SIMPATICO BURLONE, IL MEMATORE ANTE LITTERAM:

IL MACABRO, IL GORE, I SINTOMI™

IL BREAKUP TOSSICO PASSIVO AGGRESSIVO CON DANTE

in conclusione

[hannahssimblr]

After eight, in the inner city, I hold the door for Astrid. We step inside the restaurant and heat hits our faces in a waft, warming our frozen skin. Astrid slips her gloves off, folds her hat and unzips her coat with ease as I struggle, suddenly far too hot in my hat, the zip of my coat slipping between gloved fingers. I’ve pulled it inside out by the time the cloakroom attendant takes it out of my hands. I have walked snow onto the carpet behind me, while Astrid, miraculously, has not. 

“They’re all here already,” she says. “We’re the last.”

“Yes, like always.” 

It’s a table for six, and there our friends sit in conversation, their menus already on the table. 

“Oh, Astrid! Jude!” Elias gets up from his seat at the head of the table to hug us. His smile, big and white, and his face flushed from the heat. 

“We’re late,” Astrid points out. She speaks apologetically, but doesn’t actually apologise. “But we have your gift.”

“Oh!” He takes the gift bag from her and kisses both her cheeks. “This is so nice, my God, Astrid.”

I bought it, actually; the scarf made with some kind of silk mohair something-or-other, but Astrid picked it out, so really it’s she that deserves the credit. He’ll think she wrote the card too, even though she didn’t. I’m the one with the nicer handwriting.

“‘Dear Elias, on your twenty-first birthday,’” he reads as we join him at the table. “‘Here’s hoping for a year as fabulous as you are. I hope I know you forever, and we can party together at ninety-one too. You won’t need the scarf in Bali, but we hope it keeps you warm when you touch back down in Berlin next month. With love, Astrid and Jude.’ Oh,” he holds it to his chest. “You two are so sweet.”

“You are not supposed to say happy birthday unless it is a person’s actual birthday,” says Leon, swirling his wine around and pretending he can smell notes of bergamot, or whatever the server said was in it. He takes a sip, then sends the bottle back to the kitchen. 

“Oh, okay, sorry,” I say. “We should have posted the card to Indonesia. That was really stupid of us, you’re right.”

His nostrils flare while Jonas, next to him, peruses a menu.

“Wow,” he comments, “Forty seven euro for the monkfish. It seems expensive.”

“Well, it’s an occasion,” Leon says, as the server returns with a second, hopefully more acceptable, bottle of wine. “We all agreed to eat at a nice restaurant.”

I raise my eyebrows, “Oh? What occasion is it?”

“Elias’ birthday, of course, what are you-” he breaks off to mutter to the server, who then circles the table to fill our glasses. 

“I thought we just agreed not to mention the birthday until the actual birthday, which is not today, right? What date is it, again?”

Dalia sighs from her end of the table. “Jude, oh lord.”

Leon rolls his eyes. “You are being immature.” 

What’s actually immature is a twenty-six-year-old man making an unnecessary enemy of someone who still has the word ‘teen’ at the end of their age, but Dalia is already kicking me beneath the table before I can open my mouth to point this out.

“I would love to see Bali,” Astrid sighs. “When it’s so cold like this, I feel I can’t stand it. I just want to be somewhere nice and warm.”

Elias smiles. “Well, maybe for your twenty-first birthday, your boyfriend will take you there.”

“Well, we’ve just booked tickets to Amalfi, actually,” I say. “We’re going in April.”

“Oh, I love Italy.”

“Me too,” Astrid clutches his hand in hers, a gesture of excitement in their shared love of, whatever, gelato or something. They converse about places they’ve been, and what they’ve seen, using the correct, Italian pronunciation, which is fine, because that’s how they’re supposed to be pronounced, and Astrid is fluent in Italian, but sometimes when I’m privy to conversations like this, I think of Jen, and the way she’d laugh if she ever overheard them. 

Whenever a natural gap opens up in their conversation, I consider adding in my own anecdote about the time I went to Rome on a school trip when I was sixteen, and the school was cheap, so they made us do the whole journey by bus, which was so boring that Fitzy and I started squeezing dollops of toothpaste into people’s hair as they slept and posing alongside them with our two fingers up. Our punishment took the form of the teachers revoking our passes to St Peters Basilica, so while the others were in there, taking zoomed in photos of Michelangelo’s tiny penis, we spent two hours roaming the streets in search of a Dominos Pizza, which we did eventually find. Mine slipped out of its box and onto the pavement before I had even taken a bite, and we posed for photos with our two fingers up next to that, too.  

But I know that if I tell the story, and Elias won’t react the way I want him to, but gasp, and look very sad as though it’s a tragedy, and then later, Astrid will ask me why I decided to share the story in the first place, because it was kind of awkward. When Elias asks me if I’ve been to Italy before, I simply smile, and I say no. 

“You will adore it, then. Will you hire a car?”

“I suppose we will, right? Makes sense.”

Astrid nods. 

“Well, then, if you’re staying in Amalfi, you might as well drive to Sorrento. Leon and I once stayed in this incredible hotel with a sea view. I can find out what it is called.”

“Oh, please.” Her thumb strokes the back of my hand. “We could add one or two more nights to our trip, do you think?”

I smile. “Yeah, of course we can.”

He tells her about a restaurant that does gnocchi in such a way that is notably different from other gnocchis in the region, and they continue, even as the food arrives. Tiny portions. I forgot the name of what I ordered. 

Across the table, Leon and Jonas listen as Dalia talks animatedly. 

“Right, and then, the woman, whose name is Martha, by the way, turns to me, and she says-”

She is halfway through a story that needs more context than what I have. I open my phone. 

Jen, just thinking about our school tour to Rome lmao.  Oh my God - the one where the teachers caught Ashling Duggan hiding you under her bed in the hostel? Hahahahaha yes!  I still tell people about that trip, like, it’s always my go-to story with new people.  Same, we’re just at dinner now, talking about Italy. I was just remembering all the stupid things that happened.  And didn’t Cian Hayes shit himself or something??? I’m always foggy on that specific detail. Yeah, and he turned his underpants inside out because he was too lazy to get out of bed. 

Omg sick. What do your friends think of the story?

My thumb hovers over the keyboard. 

Yeah, they laughed.  Show them that compilation of photos of you and Fitzy with all your sleeping toothpaste victims.   Oh, God, I don’t have those anymore. I think I left all my photos in Dublin.  What a waste! I’ll go dig them out someday, and take them with when I come to Berlin.  Okay! Come soon, please. I miss you. 

I miss you too, Judie. It’s honestly so weird that you have a whole new girlfriend I haven’t even met.   I know. It’s weird for me too, but you’ll love her. She’s amazing.  I bet. She’s beautiful. Understatement.  I don’t know how you keep pulling it off.  Well, I’d be stupid if I didn't go out with her, wouldn’t I? Yeah, probably. Lucky you aren’t stupid, then. 

Beginning // Prev // Next

[rhiannonsknife]

Your thoughts on mean dom rhiannon?

nsfw content. mdni. knife play. bondage. role play. etc. etc. crazy rhiannon is back at it again, so here’s your warning. some aftercare. implied use of safeword.

i know i’ve probably mentioned it before but knife play with rhiannon??? guys!!! knife play with rhiannon!!!

she would love to drag the blade of her knife all over your body, preferably while she’s got you tied up on the bed. or anywhere, really. like this, there’s no way for you to escape the cold sensation of the metal running across your skin. unless, of course (!!!) you tell her to by using your safe word! then, on the rare occasion when you're genuinely too spent to enjoy it as much as she wants you to, she'll instantly drop this persona of hers, and becomes your nurturing, loving girlfriend again, who helps you figure out whatever it is that has caused it and gently works you through it by whatever it is that you desire; whether that may be being held, ordering food, taking a hot shower together etc. <3

on a side note (i really said 'on a side note' and then made this whole thought all about said side note): rhiannon would absolutely love role-play. i just know it. yes, she loves to have you at her mercy beneath her, with her knife in hand and the knowledge that you trust her enough to let her do this in mind. but it’s even better when she gets to play pretend beforehand: acting as if you’re meeting for the first time as strangers in a pub. playing along with the silly scene she had set for her sake. allowing her to pretend she’s a stranger -an eager one at that. realizing you’re even more into it than anticipated when she tries to lure you back to 'her' place. seeing the glimpse of want in her gaze. her favorite part would undoubtedly be when she gets to drag you into some dark alleyway near the pub to press the knife against your throat and tell you to get on your knees for her…

she takes you back to the house afterward, (after you’ve sucked her off right there, in the shadows, for anyone to walk by and see you. rhiannon had soothed you by assuring you she’d stab them if somebody were to catch you. “only i get to see you like this” she’d groan from above, combing her fingers through your hair as you gag. you don’t doubt, for even a second, that she’d put that knife to use if anyone else would see this side of you.) knowing the fun has only just begun.

she’ll tie you against the pole in her garage, constantly checking in with you as she wraps the rope around your wrists. “color?” she’ll whisper into your ear, licking its shell approvingly once she’s heard your whiny “green”. you both know you could stop this whole thing immediately. yet you don’t. you don’t, and knowing that you want this just as badly turns her on more than she could ever possibly articulate.

rhiannon will eat you out in this position, her mouth lapping up every drop of wetness that drips from your soaked cunt. and the worst best part is that you can’t do anything for her to fuck you the way you want it: you can’t pull her closer by the hair, like you desperately want to when she starts teasing you, circling your clit with the very tip of her tongue until your legs are shaking violently, nor can you force her away when you are raw and spent from hours of overstimulation.

and, again, one word would be enough and rhiannon would put an end to it instantly to untie you from your spot, run you a warm bath, or hold you soothingly. and yet you don’t want her to stop.

you want this: the cold press of the blade against your throat. the hungry look in her eyes and the thrill when she runs it over your skin, always gentle and careful with it, never ever pressing down too hard. the approving hum when she forces the handle between your legs and rubs it against your aching clit, laughing at you as you’re pushed over the edge from it.

“oh baby was that too much for you?” she’ll coo as you whimper, all red in the face. but rhiannon just pouts mockingly and pushes it against you harder all over again.

honestly, don’t take my word for it, but i might write a little fic about this at some point. also, i'm so sorry to the anon who requested this, this has been in my drafts for a hot minute.

[kagecreep]

Bloodlust Dreams (RoninxMC)

(KillerChat) Description: You meet Ronin in the alleyway. Kiss or kill? Why not both? (Spoilers for Ronin ending in KC)

Notes: Kiss or Kill is the final option? no. kiss AND kill. we're both going to hell hand in unloveable hand stuck in each others guts CW: extreme gore ig? and YES i know its completely unrealistic for them to survive this let me have my fantasy some dialogue in the beginning was taken from the game cuz obviously. extremely gorey i guess. not the worst but its, um, yeah. my shame bared with gnashing teeth <3

WC: 1.9k (Parts 1 & 2)

━─━────༺༻────━─━

Your skin was splitting at the seams, red hot angered blood, cells dividing and cracking open. Pinned immobile against the dirty wall, many times cleaned of splattered blood splashed with knives and boots and bullets.

"I told you, baby. I'm your little wish fulfillment. I'm what you dream of. Isn't this a story for the ages?" He grinned. "Come on –– tell me what you want! Do you hate me, do you love me? Are you gonna kill me? Or are you kissing me, darling? How much do you feel?"

There was, of course, a reason behind your desire to write about a killer. A hidden longing, founded in the beauty of tearing flesh, sinew and organs, palettes of vein blue and bile green and iron red. Being of somewhat sane mind kept you from ever enacting such things in real life––instead you dreamt of it, slept neck deep in peeled muscles and seeping blood. You wrote about it deliriously. Desirously. 

You didn't know if Ronin realized that; if he knew his game was not corruption but an allowance––permission––for you to give in to what was already there. You supposed the darkness was inside everyone, lurking, that howling beast mourning its captivity, shrieking when its head reared to the light.

Your mouth arrived at his mouth, like destruction, like deliverance, like a dream. He was laughing mad, like you're his plaything, like you're his darling, like he expected no less from you.

That laughter filled up and infected your thoughts, your muscles. You yanked the knife out from beneath your jacket where it lay concealed, pressing the shivering metal against his chest. But it delighted him––his laughter howled in the alley, barking up the brick walls. Cackling over the stains of pooled blood. 

"This is what you want, isn't it?" You hissed, biting at his lips, clawing at his jacket. The pins and zipper, the scissors, ripped at your fingers. "You want me elbow deep in your guts."

"Oh, darling," he seethed through gritted teeth, "only if you'll let me warm my cold little fingers in your aorta."

His hand gripped your hair, digging in and pulling, ripping, tearing. Sanity and skin. You kissed, tearing into his heat, desperate to overwhelm him. But standing above you, towering above, he kept you immobile. The wall of his body gave no mercy. You tried to move him, to pin him instead, to set him helplessly against your will, but his weight pressing in rendered you the prey. Heavier he leaned in, digging your knife into him willfully with his weight. You sucked in a gasp.

"C'mon, don't tell me it was all for show," he said between kisses, dark eyes watching how your attention flitted between the knife and his lips. "You pulled out the knife. Use it."

You kissed harder, pulling at his lips and tongue with your teeth, and in a blinding madness jerked the blade across his abdomen. Wet heat seeped from the wound, dripping through his black shirt and onto you. You moaned at the sensation and shared that hot breath with him, whispering into his mouth. The knife clattered out of your shaking hands.

"Am I pretty now?" You asked, squeezing the blood-soaked shirt and smearing the excess over his face.

His eyes rolled back into his head, a long moan singing from his heart. Darting from his lips, his tongue snaked out, licking the iron taste from your fingers. It curled around your bone, his piercing catching on your knuckle.

"My turn," he whispered with his devilish grin.

Fingers. Claws. Puncturing in, digging in, always consuming in liquid desire to sink within your flesh, inside, inside, inside. His fingers were inside you. He had ripped the protective layer, peeled everything back, and dug his skeleton into yours. He took your breath away. Lucifer and his pale, beating eyes.

"You offered me your heart," he murmured, lips brushing against yours in a moment of sudden gentleness. "I'm just taking what's mine, darlin'."

You laughed. Your lungs sung, collapsing, wheezing as he pushed in deeper. His grin grew wicked, tight and sharp, cackling as your vision went hazy. 

But you were not yet lost.

You pulled him in, claws over his neck, and bit into the soft flesh–-the junction between his throat and bare shoulder. The hot skin gave way and fresh blood spurted from where your teeth punctured, your wide jaws lapping up every pouring rivulet. In your ear a full moan rang from his vocal cords, vibrating in your canines and incisors. You released, letting the blood flow, and kissed open-mouth up to his lips, where you latched onto life once more. 

Foreign skin in your belly, grappling your intestine. Squeezing. You lost the ability to scream. When his grip loosened, your shivering, sweating hand clawed its way down his chest, tore his shirt, and plunged into the heat of his open wound. 

You found yourself staring into the gates of Heaven. Hands warm and sticky, grasping, inundated in Ronin's life-force. Shining, blinding light, like the sun beating down, cool rivers at your feet.

"You think that you corrupt," you whispered, bells ringing in your ears and vision blinded by the ethereal light. "No. You release. Set free. You liberated me, Ronin. You're my divine messenger."

A hitch in his breath, and he withdrew from your guts. Your vision returned from that bleaching light, and you watched his lips tremble, his eyes go wide as his pupil's shrunk.

"My angel of rot," you moaned, pressing the words into his skin through your kisses. "You gonna let me bleed all over you?" You asked, worming up through his stomach, under his lungs and finally, over his heart. "Archangel?"

You squeezed. ~+~

Sex bathed in blood. Well, you weren't sure if it was sex. Neither of you once touched the other's genitals, but you were arm deep in his organs. He was elbow-deep in yours. Maybe it was some sick, divine intervention that allowed you to live beyond that critical moment when he grasped your beating heart. You knew it shouldn't have happened. You shouldn't be standing. And even so, even living past that moment, you shouldn't have followed Ronin home like a ragged dog on a leash.

His room was darker than you realized when you had all those video calls. Through shaded windows, painted lamps, and coloured fairy lights, Ronin doused his room a deep red that bled from the walls and ceiling, pooling on the floor. Everywhere tapes and old vinyls piling up on shelves and tables––the scent of iron mingling with a thick perfume. Despite the visual and olfactory stimulation, your mind could not be torn from a single thought.

He had been gentle with you.

He ripped you open with nails, tore your flesh apart, and his blood was still crusted beneath his fingernails––but his movements within you, sinuous and lithe, warped around your intestines and organs and left no mark. He cradled each organ like an infant's head, weak and fragile, ready to break by his crushing hand.

You had not been so careful. Your actions very nearly gave him a heart attack, but here he was, sitting between your splayed legs, wiping up the last of the blood crusted on your stomach and chest. His eyes remained on his work for the most part, but occasionally drifted up to watch your heavy expression with a smirk. That spark of pride in his eye never left him.

The scar you gave him was even––almost perpendicular to the thick scars just beneath his chest, a pale pink against his white skin. It cut cleanly and sewed cleanly, with little trace of your wretched intrusion. But you––five gnarled points, jagged tearing across your torso where he ripped and gnashed. Like a door forced open, the wood splintered across the floor. You stared at him, absent of the light, and wondered if he realized you would never heal from this. You would never look the same. His at least had the chance to heal, become something pale and fragile. Yours would forever be a tender wound––a rounded, broken halo of Ronin's claws.

He was staring at you now. His ministrations on your stomach had ceased, and all his attention was on your distrait gaze.

"What?" You asked flatly.

"Jus' wondering what's going on in that pretty little head of yours," he said.

At the side of the bed, strewn across the floor, piles of bloodied tissues and cut string occupied the edges of your mind.

"Thinking about what we did," you said, and this time your voice lost its' strength; quiet and diminutive.

"Feeling regret already?" He pouted. "Here I was feeling proud of you."

"Not exactly," you said, looking up to meet his gaze. "I... hm."

Your eyes fell back down to your lap; his knees touching your inner thighs, his hands on your hips, your hands––quiet and diminutive.

"Guess I'm... wondering what you want with me now," you mumbled.

"What I want with you?" He repeated, laughing. "Darlin', I'm not nearly done with you! What makes you think that was the end? I took you to my home, didn't I? Tenderly nursed your wounds like the lovers do? Isn't that what you wanted?"

Your brows knitted, furrowed together.

"I wanted your blood on my hands."

"And you got it," he murmured, leaning in. "Doesn't that satiate you at all?"

His breath against your lips again. Coasting across, gentle––gentle as his hands wrapping around your lungs. Desire coiled up in your throat, blocking your air.

"No," you whispered.

Tears blooming in the corners of your eyes blurred your vision, but even through that haze you watched how his grin widened, sharpened, and cut into your sanity. 

"You want more?" He rasped, lips brushing against yours with every vowel. "You want another kiss from my blade, baby? Jesus, you're insatiable. Hope you don't forget to feed me, too." He paused, eyes flickering to your lips, and murmured. "Think I might be as insatiable as you."

"You want my blood in a jar?" You asked quietly.

"I want your head in a jar, sever your spinal column n' keep it as an ornament, pretty little white bones hanging like bells," he said, his voice singing in the quiet room. 

His hands roamed up and under your neck, grasping your jaw. He dug in, nails into your skin, and pulled you down, forcing you to stare him in the eye. You steeled yourself and met his demand.

"What do you want... darlin'?"

"I want everything," you said through gritted teeth.

"Patience is key. Thought, bein' a writer and all, you'd know lots about it," he said.

"Sometimes," you said, scanning his eyes. "Sometimes the words flow like a raging torrent and your fingers flick across the keys so fast you can barely hear the individual tapping. Though... yeah... sometimes you sit staring at a blank screen for hours... just waiting for something to come."

"Glad to know you have experience. Y'know, you need patience to be a killer––need to be able to hold in that blazing fire till juuust the right moment. Guess I'll have to train you up a bit," he pressed into your wound, "'n whip you into shape."

You groaned, tensing at the pain flooding from your wound.

"Does it involve real whips?" You asked, your grin spreading.

"You wish," he said.

Razor grins––spread like cut cheeks, bleeding, dripping. A beautiful, bloody ending. You wrapped him up in your arms and squeezed, breathing in his scent, taking in each of his wandering hands slipping over your body. 

[milkmily]

Hello <3

Could you pls write Shoko x (female) reader where reader is feeling a little insecure about her body and Shoko praises her while making out (and maybe fingering)

Ty

Yes I can 😈 also sorry it took me forever I've been busy these past months 😭

Shoko Ieiri x Fem! Reader | Request Open :) |

You felt horrible.

You just felt horrible about yourself.

Maybe it was the outfit you had on.

Or maybe it was because on the way to work, someone pointed out how ridiculous you looked with what you had on. It was some random people you don't even know.

Their opinion shouldn't even matter, you don't know them. Yet, it affected you so much. Honestly it was probably because you woke up in such a bad mood that their words got to you so easily. You Honestly thought your skirt looked pretty with your shirt. Your color leggings and heels matched it all. But apparently, some people don't like it. And well, their opinions mattered to you a lot.

You were soon at work, grabbing your white coat and putting it on. You were presented with Shoko who walked up to you and kissed your cheek, her gloss left on your cheek. “Morning, I got you your favorite drink.” She says as she points at the table.

You nod as you smile And start to button up the coat. She gives you a puzzled look and asks, “Why are you closing it up? Though you hated it?”

“I'm cold. The skirt isn't helping it.” A lie. Shoko hummed and said, “it isn't cold. Keep it open.” She moves her hand on top of yours to stop you. You looked at Her and sigh. She smiled as she saw your skirt and your color leggings that matched with your shirt and heels. “hey, this outfit today is cute. I like it.”

And hearing her say that made you feel good.

“Really?” You never usually say that. You either say ‘oh, I know!’ Or ‘I made this for you because I knew You'd like it’ or something else that you always say with such confidence. But today, you wanted her approval. You didn't sound as confident as you always do.

“Yeah, of course. Everything you wear is cute.” She says as she moves her hands to your hips. “why?” she asks. “What's the matter?” her tired voice asks. And you told her. You told her how in the morning you woke up late, that the hot water at your apartment had gone off so you showered with cold water, how you ran out of your favorite snack, how at the Cafe you go to to get your drink was closed, and that some random people made fun of your outfit. “And I know I shouldn't care! I know! But today they really made me feel, just- ugh. I feel horrible. Of me, of my clothes, everything of me.”

Shoko listened to everything you said. She sighs and holds your waist. “I'm sorry that happened today.” She says. “You want to take a hot bath at my place after work?” She asks and you nod. She smiles softly and cups your face, “and who cares about their opinions? You're Beautiful, you always will be. I love your cute clothes you always wear at work or when We go out.” She says as she gets closer to you.

“They Turn me on sometimes.” She admits and starts to kiss your neck. You softly sigh and hold on to her. “Really?” You ask. “Always.” She says.

The whole day at work Shoko was driving you crazy. Absolutely crazy. You could already feel how wet your panties were. You tried your best to heal anyone who walked in who needed a small healing. Satoru had come in to simply talk with Shoko about some random thing you can't even remember because all you thought about was her. How her lips would feel in that sweet spot you liked to be kissed on your neck. Her sweet words hit your ear as she squeezed and played with your nipples. You groan as you look down at Your report as you try to concentrate.

“She seems really distracted. What you do to her?” Satoru asks while grinning at the long brown haired woman. Shoko shrugs. “Nothing. Said her outfit was cute today and that was all.” She says as she sucked in her lollipop. A lollipop you had given to her yesterday that she left in the pockets of her coat. He chuckles and continues to talk about how he annoyed Nanami and about his Students.

Once the final report is done, you and Shoko sigh. “Finally!” She says as she stretches. She took her coat off and hangs it. She helps you take off yours and grabs her purse. She hands you yours and says, “I need to stop buying at the store. Is that okay?” She asks. You nod as you walked out of the infirmary room.

Shoko ended up buying one of your favorite wine brands and some snacks. once at her apartment, she had told you to go and grab the clothes you wanted as she prepared the bath. You were nervous. It isn't as if it's the first time you two have sex. You two have had it many times, even at work. On your knees, your pretty heels hitting the floor as you sucked on Shoko's clit. God, she was so stressed that day, you just wanted her to feel good. your hands on her thighs As she moans and rides your face as she came.

You grab the towel and sigh as you go into the bathroom and sit down on the stool. You washed your body and stood up to see Shoko already in the bathtub. She smiles and you dip your feet in and sit down. Shoko's eyes never leave you or your body. She smiles and wraps her arms around you as you sit down between her legs and lay your back on her chest. She breathes you in and says, “you smell nice.”

The warm water made you feel relaxed. You Honestly forgot what those people even said about you. Who gives a shit about them anyways. As you relax, Shoko's hands go under your arms and gently cup your breasts. She squeezes them as she kisses your back. “You're beautiful, you know that?” She says as she planted another kiss. “You are so beautiful.” She whispers and gently tugs your nipples. You softly moan and move your head to the side, wanting her to kiss your neck. She smiled and kissed it.

“You know.” She says in-between kisses. “You really did look cute in that short skirt and those cute colored leggings.” You shiver and whine as she slowly moves one hand down as fge other cupped your breast. “You are always somehow cute with everything you wear.” her fingers spread your lips open as she teased your clit. You whine and gasp. “I sometimes feel like you only really wear those skirts with me and with me only.” She closes your pussy lips again and squeezes them, causing you to jump.

“You were wet for me, huh?” She grins. “I saw it when you went down to pick up that pen you ‘accidently’ dropped. I saw that wet spot.” She says as her fi gets open your lips again and start to rub your clit, causing you to jump. “God, you're so hot.” She says as she bites down on your shoulder. You moan and move your his, the water slashing, some of it landing on the floor. She couldn't help But whimpers at just hearing you.

You were just so beautiful. She kisses your neck and sucked as her fingers mkve faster, causing you to hold tightly to the tub. She smiles and says, “Baby, can you have your pretty ass up?” She says. Fuck, the praises. You do as so, your ass facing her as she stood up. She smiles as she saw how wet your pussy was. She licks her fingers and rubs your wet silky folds up and down. “You are so gorgeous. You know That?” She says.

“Your pussy is so pretty too. You're all wet because of me…hmmmm.” She smiled as she kissed your ass and pushed a finger in you. You moan and turn to look up at her. her breast wet, nipples perked up. You wanted to suck and bite on them just how she likes them. You moan as you feel her finger curl up. She smiles and pulls her finger out, tasting it. “Hmm, you taste so good.” She says as she gets on one knee and kisses your ass again. She goes lower and lower to your thighs.

You shiver and moan at her kisses. She was so close to your poor Aching clit. You move your ass closer to her face and she chuckles. “Eger?” She says and licks a long string of your pussy. She moans at the taste and closes her eyes as she goes to your clit and licks it. You felt goosebumps all over your body. You close your eyes as you press yourself more on to her mouth. She moans, her moans being muffled up by your pussy. She spreads your pussy lips up as she licks to taste you. She grins as she feels your legs shake.

Shoko moves two of her fingers to your wet entrance that aches for her fingers. You moan as you feel her fingers slowly push in and out of you. And then a sharp pain is on your ass. She slapped your ass. Fuck, it felt so good. She holds your ass tight and slaps it again as she sucks your clit. She loved hearing your poor moans. Her fingers start to move fast as she thrusted them in and out of your dripping cut, your cream covering her fingers. “S-Shoko! Wait- oh my god!” You moaned as you tried to push her but she kept going. You feel like you are going to sleep the Moment you cum on her fingers and tongue. She giggles as she keeps eating you.

“Shit, You are so hot right now.” She says as she moves a hand to rub her clit. She moans as she sees how your poor legs struggled to stay up, her fingers pumping in and out of your poor wet cunt. She grins as she goes faster and you scream, cuming on her fingers. She chuckles as she sees how you squirt on her fingers. She hums and licks your cunt one last time, tasting you.

You were whining as you try to catch your breath, holding on To the tile wall. She smiled and smacked your ass, making you yelp. “You did good, babe.” She says and kisses your shoulder. “Let's get out so we can drink that wine.” She says as she give you a towel.

You two did drink the wine on the living room sofa but you couldn't Help but return the favor by eating her pussy. Her cunt dripped in your mouth as she sipped her wine and moaned. Her fingers running through your hair. You moan and look up at her. Her beautiful brown eyes looking right back at your eyes. She bites her lip and throws her head back as you suck on her clit. “Fuck, you look so beautiful.” She praises as she opens her eyes to look at you. “Eating me like this- ah fuck.” She moans and smiles. “You are always so beautiful. All mine. Fuck, you're all mine….” She moans and closes her eyes. You couldn't help but moan at her praises. You push your fingers in her as you suck and Lick her clit.

God, you felt so good. Your back arching more as she praised you. She smiles at the arch and gasps as your fingers cruel up. She nods and praises you even more. “right there baby, God, yes- you are so good- ah ah fuck yes I'm going to cum soon baby.” You loved how she talks so much during sex. Her praises and everything about her drive you crazy. She drops the wine glass on the floor, not caring if the carpet is now stained red. She tugs your hair as her feet curl. She whimpers and moans as she cupped her breast. She was so close.

Her moans soon turn into screams as she cums on your fingers. You pulled your fingers out as you licked and licked. She is so sensitive. She jumped at every lip. You smile at her as you lick your fingers clean. She smiles at you, panting. She moves her hair away from her face and says, “you did good.” And pulls you into a kiss.

Honestly, you forgot why you even felt horrible. All you thought of was how Shoko and you both looked and were.

[vodika-vibes]

Hard Times

Summary: You’ve been hiding your problems from Jesse, he has so many things to worry about already and you don’t want to add to his problems. Only, he’s coming home and you’re not sure you can hide this from him.

Pairing: ARC Trooper Jesse x GN!Reader

Word Count: 1266

Warnings: Nightmares, Reader is having prophetic dreams about order 66

A/N: Do I have over 80 requests sitting in my inbox? Yes, yes I do. Did I want to write this instead? Yes, yes I did. Anyway, happy reading!

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You’re glad Jesse is home.

Sure, he has a few more scars than he did when he left. And sure, his armor is a little more dinged up, a little more worn in some places, but he’s here and he’s alive and you’re so happy about it that you cried when you saw him.

His first day back is always a little strained. 

It takes time for him to decompress from being on the ship, but a good meal and a hot shower do wonders. Plus, he can pull you in for a hug or a kiss, and every time he does you can feel the tension draining from his body.

And when he lays next to you in bed, his arms secure around you and his face pressed into your hair, he falls asleep in a matter of moments. 

You wonder if it makes you a horrible person that you resent him for that, a little.

You haven’t had a good night's sleep in weeks. Your nights are haunted by blood and screams and a cold that lingers even when you jolt awake from your nightmares. And, even after you wake up, your hands tremble for hours after the fact, and some nights you even have to throw up, the dreams are so bad.

So that’s where you find yourself. Safely wrapped in Jesse’s arms, eyes burning from how tired you are, and exhausted down to your bones. But too afraid of your dreams to actually fall asleep.

Honestly, you're surprised that he didn’t clock your exhaustion when he showed up this morning. Everyone else in your life has.

He’ll notice in the morning, you know. Jesse is stupidly observant when he’s not recovering from a long deployment. 

Jesse sighs in his sleep, his arms tightening around you as he pulls you closer. Almost as if you’re a beloved teddy bear. You turn your head to watch him sleep for a moment. 

He looks peaceful. Untroubled. As if the stress of his life doesn’t exist now that he’s here, in your bed. 

You have to fight the urge to brush your fingers across his cheek. Even a light touch will be enough to wake him up, and that’s the last thing you want right now.

How could you be afraid of anything with Jesse right here?

And slowly, without your permission, your eyes flutter closed as sleep claims you.

Cold. It’s so cold.

Lights dim, and then go out completely, drowning you in a sea of frigid darkness. Only a few dim lights remain, but they’re so far away. Too far away.

The more the lights go out, the colder it gets.

Is this how it ends? Is this how everything ends—

“Cyare! Wake up”

Your eyes snap out, and it takes you a moment to realize that you’re still safely in bed. Jesse’s hands are on your shoulders, and he looks worried, though the expression fades as your gaze meets his.

“Jess—” You’re trembling from the cold, it feels as if someone shoved ice into your bloodstream.

“You were having a nightmare,” He grabs a fleece from the end of the bed and drapes it over you, it won’t help. You know from experience, “Your temperature just dropped, are you okay?”

His hand presses against your cheek, and he frowns before he leans to the side table and grabs his comm, “I’m calling Kix. You’re like ice.”

“I’m okay,” Your tongue feels heavy and clumsy, “I’ll be alright when the sun rises.”

Jesse stares at you, unimpressed, “Yeah. No. I’m calling Kix.”

You sigh, and your gaze flickers to the chrono next to the bed. Four hours. You’ve only slept for four hours. Jesse moves out from under the covers, and you watch as he slips into the fresher, still listening to his brother. 

He returns with a thermometer and passes it to you.

You already know what it’s going to say, but you stick the small device under your tongue anyway. Your temperature is going to be edging towards hypothermic, but not so low that you’re actually in danger.

At least, that was what Spoogle told you when you started having these nightmares.

It beeps and you hand it back to Jesse, who dutifully reports the number to his brother. Whatever Kix says clearly bothers Jesse, based on the way his eyes narrow at you, and then he hangs up the comm.

“Jesse?”

“Kix says to get you into a warm shower. Not hot, but warm.”

“Jesse, I’m fine.”

He takes your hands, pulls you out of the bed, and tugs you towards the fresher, “Forgive me if I don’t believe you. Kix is on his way right now.”

“It was just a nightmare, Jesse. Really, I’ve been dealing with this for a month now.” 

His hands pause from where they’re tugging your sleep shirt off, and he pins you in place with a disappointed look, “Your temperature has been dropping like this every night for a month? And you didn’t see a doctor?”

“I…well…Spoogle said—”

He sighs and turns to start the water, “Babe, I love you but you’re such a dingbat sometimes.”

“Hey!”

“Your lips are blue.” He counters flatly, and then he turns and lifts you into the shower. The warm water burns against your icy skin, and you flinch out of the way.

Jesse’s frown deepens, and he turns the temperature down a little, “How’s that?”

Hesitantly you hold your arm under the water, and when the water doesn’t burn like fire, you step under the spray of water fully. “It’s better,” You admit, as the shivering starts to slowly subside.

“Good.” He scans you for a moment, “So, these nightmares. What are they about?” Jesse asks as he props open the fresher door so he’ll be able to hear the doorbell when Kix arrives.

You shrug and fold your legs to sit on the floor of the shower. You’re too tired to stand, “I don’t remember the details. Just the cold, and the blood. And the dark.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

You’re quiet for a moment, and then you sigh, “You’re fighting a war, Jesse. I didn’t want to distract you.”

He sighs as well and crouches next to the tub, his hand coming out to press against your now-soaked hair, “I’d like it if you told me these things, cyare. We’re supposed to be partners.”

“Sorry.”

“I forgive you.” His hand moves to cup your cheek.

“...I should get out of the shower before Kix gets here.”

“No.”

“...but I’m naked?”

Jesse huffs out a laugh, “It’s Kix, and he’s coming here in his capacity as a medic. I don’t think he’ll care that you’re naked.”

“Oh.”

Something softens on his face, “If it bothers you, though, then we can get you dressed before he gets here.”

You pause and then nod slowly, “I’d prefer that.”

“Then that’s what we’ll do.” His hand is still so gentle against you, that you sigh and lean into his touch.

“Love you, Jesse.”

“I know, cyare. I love you too.” He runs his thumb across your lips, “The fact that you’re sick is probably why you’re having these nightmares. Kix will help.”

“...yeah.”

You know, somehow, that the dreams are warnings. But how are you supposed to say that? You’re no Jedi. You are just some lady from the lower levels who works as a translator. 

Maybe he’s right, though. Maybe your dreams aren’t a warning of something to come. But, if they get much worse, maybe you’ll ask Jesse to bring you to the temple.

Just in case.

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[averagegazan2]

Wind howls outside like something out of a classic horror movie, a cold breeze sneaks through window cracks, and tiny rain drops knock your window in amusing rhythm. While inside, you lie beneath heavy blankets, watch some family movie with your loved ones, and hold a cup of hot chocolate that fills you with warmth and energy. Winter has always been a season of warmth, love and good times with my family. 😍😍

Sadly, all of this sounds now like a distant memory. People don't have a roof over head to protect them, most of them live in tents that barely stand to wind, and suffer from the lack of mattresses, blankets and warm clothes. Even heating devices are now longer available due to lack of power supply and the shortage of wood and coal. Winter is now a season of suffering, coldness and bitterness. 😞😞 But, you can help changing this.

I humbly ask you to donate to my campaign and share my story. Your support can help me buy warm clothes, blankets and mattresses for my kids, keeping them safe and healthy. I'm also expecting the birth of a new baby next January (which usually brings the coldest weather). I need to buy clothes and provide heating for this little one to ensure she stays safe and cozy (Yes, it's a girl 😇).

✅️My campaign is vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #252 )✅️

Warm regards,

Alaa & his family