#YANCY OH MY GOD YANCY . HELLO

[mithomite]

what they dont tell you about rewatching favorite media from years ago is that I DONT WANNA BE FREEEE . LEAVE ME IN LUXURY!! IF I TR

[wit4writ]

PJO Episode 2 Detailed Review (Part 1/2)

So, episode two serves as our introduction to Camp Half-Blood and the world of demigods, and it wasn’t…great. I really didn’t want to write this review, hence the delay.

Before you come after me with torches and pitchforks, remember what I wrote about exposition robots? Well, this episode was FULL of them, which interfered with the flow of the story and development of characters. So, time to write a detailed review of episode two! (Which will be split in two parts because it’s so long.)

First up, a recap, which I didn’t have an issue with, so moving on.

Percy is in the infirmary after his big fight and sees a girl watching him. When he asks where he is, she tells him, “You drool when you sleep.”

This is a classic line from the book, but my biggest issue with putting the line here is that it feels very abrupt. Framing it as, “You know you drool when you sleep?” would make it flow easier.

Percy falls back asleep and wakes up again to Grover sitting beside him, and their conversation is fraught with tension as Percy grieves and Grover rambles. Again, this conversation could’ve been tightened up with less words.

Mr. D was great. Perfect casting, but I would’ve liked if we had character clues to Mr. D’s identity and Percy figuring it out instead of Grover telling him who he was. I appreciated Percy being a bit sassy, but I think he could’ve given him more attitude. I also didn’t need the whole “Mr. D pretends to be Percy’s dad” part, that felt a too cruel. My ideal scene would go something like this:

// Percy walks in to see Mr. D dozing.

Percy: “Excuse me?”

No response. Percy tries again, a bit louder.

Percy: “Excuse me? I’m Percy Jackson, I’m new here…Hello? Did you hear me? I said—”

Mr. D interrupts him, sitting up straight.

Mr. D: “Yeah, I heard you, Peter Johnson!”

Percy: “That’s not my name.”

Mr. D: “Well, that’s not my problem.”

Percy: “Hey, I’m just looking for the office, or someone who’s in charge?”

Mr. D scans Percy carefully, a gleam in his eye.

Mr. D: “You want to know where the office is? Well, maybe if you grab me that 1985 Chateau Haut-Brion in the galley I’d be able to remember.”

Percy: “Why can’t you just tell me?”

Mr. D: “You help me, I help you. It’s how the world works, Peter.”

Grover runs in, having overheard that last part.

Grover: “Mr. D, you know you can’t, you—”

Mr. D glares at him and Grover takes a step back and swallows hard.

Grover: “Uh, Percy, this is Mr. D—Mr. D, Percy.”

Mr. D: “Yeah, heard him the first time when he was interrupting a great nap.”

Percy: “Did you though?”

Grover: “Percy! Sir, he didn’t mean it—”

Percy: “Why are you so scared of this guy? Maybe if he could get off his own lazy butt, he’d get more blood to his brain and be able to remember my name.”

Mr. D stares at him darkly, Grover looking frantically between them both.

Mr. D: “Are you mocking me?”

Vines twine around Percy’s ankles, trapping him in place. Mr. D leans forward.

Mr. D: “You know, I could blast you, but if you get me that bottle, I’d be happy to forget this whole thing even happened.”

Mr. Brunner/Chiron (offscreen): “That’s enough.”

He enters the room on his wheelchair.

Percy: “Mr. Brunner?”

Mr. Brunner/Chiron: “Hello Percy. I’m afraid Mr. Brunner is a pseudonym I used while I was at Yancy—please, call me Chiron.”

Percy: “Oh. Okay…”

Chiron: “Mr. D, remember your restrictions.” (to Percy) “Zeus forbid Mr. D from consuming alcohol while he’s here.”

Mr. D: “Apparently, I need to ‘set an example,’ well I don’t think so, Dad!”

Percy: “Dad?” He thinks hard. “You’re Dionysus. The god of wine.”

Mr. D: “Wow, someone give the boy a prize before I blow him up.”

Grover: “Sir, Percy’s just distraught. His mom—”

Chiron: “Yes, I think we can be a little more accommodating, considering…”

Mr. D thinks it over.

Mr. D: “Sure. If he apologizes.” //

Percy then grudgingly apologizes, and Chiron ushers him out, quickly stepping out of his chair to reveal his true form. The last little scene where Grover says something doesn’t feel right is cut, instead he goes with them before Chiron sends him away to give them privacy. I think these changes would improve the flow and serve as characterization for not only Mr. D, but demonstrating his relationship with Grover, Chiron, and Percy.

The camp looked great, but Chiron’s speech over top of the montage served as more exposition. It would’ve worked better for Percy to be asking questions to make this an active conversation which he was a participant in. That’s why I appreciated Percy talking to Chiron about the pen, but I would’ve had Chiron introduce the name of the sword here and cut some of the words during his “magical items don’t obey the laws of the physical world,” bit. I would’ve rewritten a LOT of this whole conversation. I did like how Percy saw through Chiron’s rambling and realized the possibility of being unclaimed.

The Hermes cabin looked cool and Percy finding the blue candy still in his bag was a nice touch.

When Luke approaches, I think he should’ve said something so that it makes Percy’s first reaction to him more logical. Something like:

// In the background: “He’s the guy who killed the Minotaur, I think.”

Luke (offscreen): “We should find out.” (to Percy) “Hey.”

Percy looks over and sees Luke and his friends approaching.

Luke: “You’re the kid who killed the Minotaur, right? Percy something?”

Percy: “Yeah.”

Luke and his friends exchange looks.

Luke: “Wow. You must be pretty tough.”

Percy: “Look, if you want to give me a hard time, do it tomorrow. I can’t do any more today.”

Luke: “Relax, fighter. I didn’t mean it like that.”

Percy: “You didn’t?”

Luke: “Nah. I just wanted to say we heard about what happened on the hill. We’re sorry about your mom.”

The other kids nod.

Luke: “I know things are tough right now, but you’re gonna get through it. Believe me, it gets better.”

Percy: “Thanks.”

Luke extends his hand and Percy shakes it.

Luke: “I’m Luke. Welcome to Camp Half-Blood.” //

Then, I’d have Luke invite Percy to lunch and say something about giving him a tour the next day, to allow for a smoother transition to the next scene.

Unfortunately, now that we’ve been introduced to Luke, we need to…talk about Luke. His actor, I mean.

Firstly, I have no issue with how Luke looks. What I do have an issue with is how his actor is portraying him.

Luke is supposed to be charismatic and confident, a leader and camp counsellor. He’s lived at camp for ages, and everyone acknowledges his amazing swordsmanship, and even if he has failed a quest (though I’m not sure if they’re going with that storyline) he’s seemingly good-natured about it.

I’m not getting any of that from the actor. He comes off as more anxious than confident, someone who’d rather not be in the spotlight. Unfortunately, that impression carried throughout the whole episode, and it was not helped by the fact Luke was mostly an exposition robot to spout facts at Percy.

The darkness transition is now three seconds—still feels a little long, but better than the first episode.

Grover’s scene in the woods I would’ve cut entirely. It was sweet to see him with the dryad (who may or may not have been his mom), but it honestly wasn’t needed. I would’ve had Grover be in the background in the previous scene, maybe watching Percy go to lunch before heading off, then started the next scene with Grover, Mr. D, and Chiron already altogether, and had them vaguely hinting instead of outright saying Percy’s mom was alive, to increase the suspense. Something like:

// Grover: “I don’t understand, why haven’t you told Percy yet?”

Chiron: “The truth can be very dangerous if not handled carefully.”

Grover: “But it’s his mom! He deserves to know!”

Chiron: “Grover, there are powerful forces at work, and we still don’t fully comprehend their motives. If we tell Percy the truth too early, we may lose him.”

Mr. D: “Then you’ll be the worst Protector on record, between Thalia and this kid.”

Grover: “But I don’t want to lie to him. He’s my best friend.”

Mr. D: “Then I suggest you avoid him, because if you say one word of this, one word—I’ll put you on stable cleaning duty for the next year. Understood?” //

So that's the end of Part 1, PART 2 will be linked here. Thoughts, reblogs, and comments are welcome!

[rat-that-writes]

The Egos’ Search Histories

a/n: i am a GENIUS.

tw: mentions of drugs, murder, violence, sex, erections, swearing, guns, burying bodies

Dark

➭ alright first of all

- every time he searches something on google or youtube he uses perfect grammar and sentence structure he cannot bring himself to just type “how big is the biggest lizard” he has to type “How big is the largest lizard ever found?” like a fucking old man

➭ also u bet he searches about the worlds biggest lizards. he doesn’t have much free time but when he does it’s filled with the weirdest thoughts; e.g.

• “How long would it take to suck all the blood out of the average adult?”

• “How to get rid of someone’s soul?”

• “Does the law apply to the void?”

for some reason he doesn’t get a lot of answers

actor

➭ unlike Dark he does not care about grammar

- well,, neither do any of the other egos lol

➭ oh god

- its just pickup lines and romance/sex tips and the odd concerning question about either his dick or like… murder maybe

• “is it normal to have an erection that lasts 2 days”

• “does my s/o really love me quiz” (he seeks reassurance in some Not Great™️ ways oops)

• “how to ask your s/o to paint you nude”

• “how to ask you s/o to let you paint them nude”

yancy

➭ sweet boy doesn’t know how modern tech works

• “howtoaskforahug” (after getting no results he had to be told he needs to use the space bar)

• “h o w t o a s k f o r a h u g” (after getting no results AGAIN he had to be told how to actually type)

• “where is my shirt” (after not getting the results he needed he had to be told that you cant ask google about something google wouldn’t know)

➭ that’s basically the extent of his search history because he finds it too confusing

➭ he just gets you to google it for him

- when he asks he says “baby can youse search on the globble about where i can buy a pocket knife?”

- other things he calls google:

• gooble

• gomble

• gobble

• goob

• joojul

• god damn search thingy

illinois

➭ illi’s is boring because its just like research about artefacts hes found and shit

➭ but there are a few things in there which you would take note of

• “is there a tent specifically designed to have sex in”

• “where can i find an aphrodisiac”

• “tiny cowboy hat on amazon”

• “cowboy hats for dogs amazon”

damien

➭ you would think his is just political and business shit

- and it is

- well, it is on his work laptop.

➭ his personal laptop?

• “doja cat concert tickets”

• “megan thee stallion concert tickets”

• “full version of the cpr song on tiktok”

• “hello kitty plushies bulk”

wilford

➭ oh jesus.

• “where to buy shotguns in bulk”

• “where to buy iguanas in bulk”

• “how to bury 12 bodies in one day”

• “where to buy an alligator”

• “how many alligators would it take to overthrow the country”

• “where to buy ketamine in bulk”

[cozyenigma]

A Single Word

Soulmate AU? Soulmate AU 😌

Pairing- Reader/Yancy

Word Count- 1239

Request?- Nope!

Summary- There was always a lot of build up and curiosity over what words your soulmate would say to you. You got just the one but that was all you really needed.

Tag List- @cookielover0001010 , @swag-droid

For most people, obviously their words meant a lot to them. With all the talk of soulmates and different tropes in movies and books, it was hard not to pay attention really. The first words some special person would say to you were stamped somewhere on your body. There was endless romantic potential obviously. You’d seen dozens of social media posts, often complete with professional photo shoots, of loving couples with their words front and center.

Some were funny in retrospect. Plenty held deeper meaning later on in a relationship. Even countless more were just a simple hello. Some people even had entire rambling paragraphs that’d take up huge swathes of skin. Regardless, they seemed to bond people together in some way and as a kid you couldn’t help but be excited as you waited to see what yours would be. You and your friends took endless little personality quizzes predicting what you’d get. Back then you used to write on the back of your hand with a marker, just to imagine the shape of the words.

So, when your words finally did show up, you were more than a little disappointed. Because it wasn’t words, plural. In a quick scrawl, small and unassuming on the inside of your left arm, was just one word.

Oh.

When it first showed up, you'd spent so long just looking at it. It wasn't even a hello. What were you supposed to make of it? What was the context? Was it a disappointed "oh" or a surprised one? When your friends had gone around showing off their brand new words, you stayed in your seat and held your arm close to you.

Nowadays your word didn't bother you as much. When someone's words came up in conversation you didn't mention yours. Some of the anxiety was still there but you figured it could've been worse. You could find plenty of examples of people having swear words somewhere obvious on their body. Most days you didn't think of your word at all.

Like almost every other case though, the day when it did was one you'd remember.

You sighed, happy for the cup of hot chocolate in your hands. It was just warm enough you wouldn't freeze out here during a short walk but not warm enough that you could skip the winter wear. Hot cup between your hands, you decided to cut through the park on your way home. You'd seen a few people around but the park was mostly empty still. It was peaceful and quiet. Snow and slush crunched beneath your shoes as you walked.

Taking the time to enjoy the scenery, you spotted someone walking their dog coming your way. You moved to the side without much thought. As you neared, you could see it was a man with a big, happy looking dog with him. You sipped at your hot chocolate.

Just as you went to pass him though, your foot slipped against a patch of ice. One weightless instant later you were on the ground. You wince at the stinging in your hands, seeing that you'd crushed your cup as you fell. Lamenting the loss of your hot chocolate was the least of your worries though.

Your eyes widened as you looked up at the man in front of you. His coat was well and truly soaked. Hot chocolate dripped off him and his dog sniffed at the puddle around his feet. Luckily you missed the pooch completely.

His owner was less fortunate and blinked down at the mess he suddenly found himself in. You realized you should be apologizing right now. Preferably before the both of you froze out here.

"Oh my god," you were scrambling to your feet as best you could, trying not to fall again, "I'm so sorry!"

Now that you looked closer, that looked like a pricey coat. One that might need to be dry cleaned and preferably not, y'know, covered in hot chocolate.

"I can pay for that?” You offered lamely. You desperately hoped it wasn't that expensive.

The guy glanced down at himself and back at you, eyes wide. You grimaced at the wet feeling in your shoes, unsure if it was just water or more hot chocolate.

"It didn't burn you, did it?" You eyed the wet splotch on him. A shuffling at your feet drew your attention downwards and you saw his dog sniffing your shoes. "I'm glad I didn't get any on your dog at least."

Still the man just looked at you. He didn't even seem upset about the coat. In that moment, he stared at you like you'd appeared out of thin air. Like the world had stopped with you standing here in front of him. The sort of look that you weren't at all used to getting.

Then, and only then, did he speak.

"Oh."

The cup dropped from your hand. Now that you were on the other end of it, you think you might know how he felt. You thought over what you'd just said to him. There was heat rushing to your cheeks but it wasn't from the cold.

"I think I should probably apologize again," you said scratching the back of your head, "considering you uh- have all that somewhere on you?"

He huffed a laugh. This whole time he hadn't taken his eyes off you. "Better than what I gave youse. I had somethin' to go off of at least."

"Go off of?" You asked.

Nodding quickly, he unbuttoned the wet coat and yanked up the hem of his shirt. Written across the right side of his stomach was what you'd said to him in your handwriting. It took up a good chunk of real estate.

"See, I was always a dog person but figured I would actually need to have a dog at some point," he stooped down and scratched the dog between the ears. "Plus he's a good walkin buddy, so, thanks for that.”

"You got him because of your words?" As if he knew you were talking about him the dog wagged his tail, expecting pets. "What's his name?"

"Ah, well," he rubbed the back of his neck, "his friends call him Wheels."

"His friends?" You asked, giving Wheels a good scratch.

The man let out a little laugh. "Well that's how ya get the best nicknames."

He held out a hand, a dopey little grin on his face. "Name's Yancy."

You introduced yourself, returning the handshake. Yancy didn't bother buttoning his coat back up, instead taking it off and tying it around his waist. You grimaced.

"Still feel bad about the coat though."

"What, this?" He picked at the sodden fabric. "Ain't mine. Friend I borrowed it from won't miss it neither."

"If you say so," you scooped up the cup you dropped before chucking it into a nearby trash can.

"But if ya really wanna make it up to me," Yancy smirked as he pointed towards the park exit, "youse could let me buy ya a new drink sometime?"

You couldn't help it. The tension broke then and you laughed. "How's that supposed to make it up to you?"

"I've been waitin' years for this," Yancy was already walking ahead you, Wheels trotting happily by his side. His words were easy like you’d already known each other for years. Bubbly, he turned as he walked so he could face you. "I got lotsa questions, doll."

[kookie-doughs]

Y/N L/N AND THE HALFBLOODS

Percy Jackson X Reader -Y/N L/N met Percy Jackson and everything was now ruined.

CHAPTER 1: THE BEGGINING OF IT ALL

It was quite dark in my room. Unclear of what's happening... Of what's going on... But one thing is clear to me... Someone is calling me from somewhere. Tossing and turning doesn't help the anxiety building up at the pit of my stomach. Come to me I'm scared... Dont be scared. I would never hurt you Who are you? Fall... With me... I don't want to hear you anymore... We'll rule as one.... This is just a dream... Denying won't keep me... This is not real... We are one... I'm hearing things...

Tears pricked my eyes and I shot up trembling. As I thought all of those were just a dream. With what little time have I caught my breath. My alarm stared ringing 6 minutes after I woke up. D/N, my dog, nudged my hand and looked at me with his worried eyes. "I'm good boy... I'll be good. Today's the class trip... I have to be good." I ran down stairs to see my mom cooking breakfast. "Hey there sweetie. You excited for the trip~?" She sang. I reluctantly nodded. "Yeah..." As mom set D/N's bowl she turned to me with a worried look. "You sure? Your enthusiasm sure tells me how excited you are." "Will D/N be coming with me?" On cue my dad already in his suit came down and gave my head a kiss. "Of course sweetie. He's a support animal, they have no choice." He smiled. Taking a pancake from the plate, he didn't bother adding butter nor syrup and bit it like bread. "Anyways, I gotta go. Have fun at your trip. And I'll see you after work." He gave me and my mom a kiss then left. "Start eating. We have to make sure you don't miss your bus." ~ The bus was noisy. Everyone is screaming and laughing loudly. I sat at the very front with Mrs. Rudolph. She's my history teacher and our class adviser. She looks like a grumpy old witch lady who eats children, but her personality is far from that. Which seems to be not enough for my classmates as they're very bratty in her class. D/N was currently laid on Mrs Rudolph's lap as she gently pet him. "Are we close yet Mrs Rudolph?" I asked. She gave me a smile, "yes quite close. In fact, it reminds me to remind you kids something." Picking up D/N from her lap she gently placed him on mine and stood up. "Attention!!" She yelled immediately changing from her soft demeanor. They kids instantly settled down and kept quiet. "Good, now... Is everyone aware of where we'll be going?" "Yes Mrs Rudolph..." We all reply. "And where are we going?" No one answered. I could sense she was about to get mad so I answered on my own. "Metropolitan museum of art..." "Good job Y/N!" She smiled at me and glared at the others. "We'll, I'd like to remind you lot that we won't be touring alone. Another school will be joining us, Yancy Academy! Now I wouldn't be the one supervising the tour, it'll be Yancy Academy's Latin teacher, so we need to show them we are capable and proper. I'm putting Y/N L/N in charge of the group. Listen to what she says and do participate when asked." Whispers started coming once again. I've always been Mrs Rudolph's favorite. It's not like she has a choice, I'm the only proper one among her students after all. "Keep quiet!" In an instant the whispering died. "I will not hear anything from your mouths about Y/N being in charge! She'll have the same power as I! If you have a problem speak louder and say it to me! Understand?!" "Y-Yes Mrs Rudolph..." The bus then stopped moving. "Y/N..." Mrs Rudolph rested an arm on my shoulder. "Lead them." She smiled and went out. I cleared my throat. "E-Everybody file ou-out properly an-and orderly... P-please." Grumbles and mumbles came from them as they did what I said. Once everyone was out I got out. I had D/N in my arms. The first thing I did as I got out was examine everything. From the distance, you could see the students who I assume are from Yancy Academy. A particular group had caught my eyes. A redheaded girl was throwing wads of sandwich that stuck in a guy's curly brown hair, his friend was clearly agitated by what's happening and had balled his fist. "Y/N L/N." Mrs Rudolph called snapping me out from the trance. "H-Here!" "Okay so everyone is here. Remember, Y/N L/N is in charge. Now go mix with the Yancy kids." Mrs Rudolph clapped and almost immediately everyone ran towards the group. She walked up to me and pointed at D/N. "Dogs aren't allowed inside sweetie I'm sorry. We tried telling them." A whimper came from my boy as he scoot closer to my chest. "It'll be fine boy. W-would you... Mind?" "Not at all. I was going to offer after all." She smiled and took D/N from me. "Now run along and make friends. He'll be with you by lunch." I turned to see my classmates only to see them instantly making friends with the strangers. I could never do that. Getting closer I searched curly brown haired guy and his friends. A man had called our attention by clearing his throat, not giving me the chance to find curly guy. It was a middle-aged guy in a motorized wheelchair. He had thinning hair and a scruffy beard and a frayed tweed jacket. "Everybody file." I said which thankfully they followed. "Hello to everyone." He gave us a comforting smile. "I'm Mr. Brunner, Yancy Academy's Latin teacher. I was told Y/N L/N will be in charge of your group?" I stepped up and greeted him. "All right. Well, feel free to mix in with the group. We'll be staying for a while." He gathered us around a thirteen-foot-tall stone column with a big sphinx on the top, and started telling us how it was a grave marker, a stele, for a girl about our age. He told us about the carvings on the sides. I was listening to what he had to say, because it was kind of interesting, but everybody around me was talking, only one kid had been trying to keep them quiet and he keeps getting glares from someone who looks like Mrs Rudolph every time. Mr. Brunner kept talking about Greek funeral art. Finally, a snicker came from behind, and a kind of loud reply of, "Will you shut up?" Came. The whole group laughed. Mr. Brunner stopped his story. The guy who had said shut up was the friend of curly. "Mr. Jackson," Mr. Brunner said, "did you have a comment?" His face was totally red and he said, "No, sir." Mr. Brunner pointed to one of the pictures on the stele. "Perhaps you'll tell us what this picture represents?" I looked at the carving, and back at the guy who looked relived. "That's Kronos eating his kids, right?" "Yes," Mr. Brunner said, obviously not satisfied. "And he did this because ..." "Well... Kronos was the king god, and—" "God?" Mr. Brunner asked. "Oh uh..." He stammered. Obviously his one mistake got rid of all the information he remembered of the image. "Titan," I reminded him a little too loudly. They all had turned on me. "Ms L/N, care to help Mr Jackson?" "I-I, he knows... I don't..." I turned to Mr Jackson who looked at me as if he needed help. When he mouthed please I gulped. "H-He didn't trust his kids, who were the gods. So, um, Kronos ate them..." As if he had a moment of epiphany, Mr Jackson looked at me and Mr Brunner. "Can you continue on Mr Jackson?" "Okay, Kronos's wife hid baby Zeus, and gave Kronos a rock to eat instead. And later, when Zeus grew up, he tricked his dad, Kronos, into barfing up his brothers and sisters—" "Zeus fed Kronos a mixture of mustard and wine, which made him puke his other five children, who were immortal gods, had been living and growing up completely undigested in the Titan's stomach." I interrupted... Oh god was that rude? "Eeew!" said one of the girls behind us. "—and so there was this big fight between the gods and the Titans," he continued, "and the gods won." "The gods defeated their father, sliced him to pieces with his own scythe, and scattered his remains in Tartarus, the darkest part of the Underworld." I continued. Some snickers from the group. Behind us, the red haired girl mumbled to a friend, "Like we're going to use this in real life. Like it's going to say on our job applications, 'Please explain why Kronos ate his kids.'" "And why, Mr. Jackson," Brunner said, "to paraphrase Miss Bobofit's excellent question, does this matter in real life?" "Busted," curly guy muttered. "Shut up," Ms Bobofit hissed, her face even brighter red than her hair. I thought about his question, and shrugged. "I don't know, sir." "I see." Mr. Brunner looked disappointed. "How about you Ms L/N?" I shook my head frantically not sure of what to say. "Well, half credit, Mr. Jackson, Ms L/n, You both did well. On that happy note, it's time for lunch. Mrs. Dodds, Mrs Rudolph, would you lead us back outside?" The class drifted off, the class still mixed with the other. "Want to join us for lunch?" Mr Jackson offered scratching his head. "Uhm..." My face was heating up I never had friends before. I was about to reply when I heard a loud whimper from outside. It was D/N's cry. "I'm sorry." I said and ran towards the sound. They were about to follow when Mr. Brunner called, "Mr. Jackson." Running outside I searched for D/N. "Hey boy, where are you?!" I called. Not long after I found him by the fountain alone. "Oh god, what are you doing here alone? Why were you crying? Weren't you with Mrs Rudolph?" I cradled him in my arms and lied on the grass. Overhead, a huge storm was brewing, with clouds blacker than I'd ever seen over the city. I figured maybe it was global warming or something, because the weather all across New York state had been weird since Christmas. We'd had massive snow storms, flooding, wildfires from lightning strikes. I wouldn't have been surprised if this was a hurricane blowing in. Some of the guys were pelting pigeons with Lunchables crackers. Red hairedgirl was trying to pickpocket something from a lady's purse, and, of course, Mrs. Rudolph was with her look alike. "Hey," someone had looked down on me. "Sorry I ran. I heard D/N cry..." "Percy, Percy Jackson." He smiled. "Huh?" "I'm Grover Underwood." Curly beamed. "O-Oh... I'm Y/N L/N, this is D/N." He barked in response to the introduction. "Really?!" Grover looked at D/N in surprise. "Can I borrow him?! Please??" Me and Percy looked at him weirdly but I handed him D/N anyways. Grover sat on the edge of the fountain, and Percy and I close enough but not an earshot away. "Detention?" I asked. "Huh?" "Did you get left behind for detention?" I asked him. "Nah," he said. "Not from Brunner. I just wish he'd lay off me sometimes. I mean—I'm not a genius. He thinks I know everything about Mythology and stuffs." "I think you are." I smiled at him. "You're pretty smart." "Yeah, well this genius is dyslexic." He smirked. "No way." "Way." "I am too!!" "What?" "Okay we're totally dyslexic twins now." I chuckled. "Totally." Being the awkward kid I am my stomach had to growl. "Want to have my apple?" I felt awkward and took his apple. "Thanks." We watched the stream of cabs going down Fifth Avenue, and had small talks about random stuffs, we ranged our topic from his past schools, to his mom, Nancy Bobofit the mean redhead, and Mrs Dodds his mathematics teacher. Mr. Brunner parked his wheelchair at the base of the handicapped ramp. He ate celery while he read a paperback novel. A red umbrella stuck up from the back of his chair, making it look like a motorized cafe table. Percy was about to unwrap my sandwich when Nancy Bobofit appeared in front of me with her ugly friends—I guess she'd gotten tired of stealing from the tourists—and dumped her half-eaten lunch in Grover's lap where D/N sat. "Oops." She grinned at me with her crooked teeth. Her freckles were orange, as if somebody had spray-painted her face with liquid Cheetos D/N tackled her down, not biting her but barking at her not letting her up. And Percy tried to held his laughter in. Nancy screamed at D/N and tried to hit him. When she had successfully hit him she glared at me then the dog. "This stupid dog!" She then kicked him. When his whimper came out. "Hey?! What do you think you're doing!?" I screamed. "You don't know how to control your stupid dog!" "You dumped your lunch on him he had every right to mount you!" Grover had D/N now cradled in his arms. My teeth were gritting at the sight of this redhead. I was about to lift my hand on her. I don't remember what happened clearly, but I was pretty sure the water grabbed her, Nancy was sitting on her butt in the fountain, screaming, "Percy pushed me!" "No he didn't you liar!!" Mrs. Dodds materialized next to us. Some of the kids were whispering: "Did you see—" "—the water—" "—like it grabbed her—" I didn't care about the whispers. All I knew was that Percy was in trouble again. As soon as Mrs. Dodds was sure poor little Nancy was okay, promising to get her a new shirt at the museum gift shop, etc., etc., Mrs. Dodds turned on Percy. There was a triumphant fire in her eyes, as if he'd done something she'd been waiting for all semester. "Now, honey—" "He didn't do anything! Why are you punishing him?! Weren't you watching what was happening?!" I glared at her. Staring straight in her eyes. I don't know where I got this confidence and everything but I am starting down the teacher Percy is most scared of and winning. "I'd like to apologize for the bad conduct my student had affected yo---" "Nancy Bobofit is in the wrong not Percy! She. Hurt. My. Dog." I could hear the poison laced in my words. Mrs Rudolph came to me, "sweetie, let's go back in the bus. We have to leave." She took D/N from Grover and dragged me away from the scene. "But----" "Ms. L/N, we'll miss the schedule. Let's go." As if D/N knew he jumped off from Mrs Rudolph's hold and ran. "D/N!!" I didn't bother saying anything to Mrs Rudolph and ran after him. "Y/N!!" She tried calling after. I had lost D/N a few times and I found him. He was barking and growling at something. I went to check and saw Percy swing a sword at a shriveled hag with bat wings and claws and a mouth full of yellow fangs... She exploded into yellow powder, vaporized on the spot, leaving nothing but the smell of sulfur and a dying screech and a chill of evil in the air, as if those two glowing red eyes were still watching me. "Percy?" I called. His sword was gone and there was a ballpoint pen in his hand. His hands were still trembling. "W-Was th-that... D-did..." "Percy," I slowly walked up to him and pulled him to a comforting hug. "Calm down. Breathe. I... Also saw that. You're not imagining things alone." We went back outside. D/N leading us. It had started to rain. Grover was sitting by the fountain, a museum map tented over his head. Nancy Bobofit was still standing there, soaked from her swim in the fountain, grumbling to her ugly friends. When she saw me, she said, "I hope Mrs. Kerr whipped your butt." I said, "Who?" "Our teacher. Duh!" We blinked. "We had no teacher named Mrs. Kerr." Percy said. He asked Nancy what she was talking about. She just rolled her eyes and turned away. We went over to Grover to ask where Mrs. Dodds was. He said, "Who?" But he paused first, and he wouldn't look at Percy, so we thought he was messing with us. "Not funny, man," he told him. "This is serious." "I am concerned as well..." Grover looked at me in surprise. "A-about what?" "About... Mrs Dodds? Percy and I saw something really disturbing." Thunder boomed overhead. Percy then let go of me and went over to Mr. Brunner who hasn't moved from his spot. I immediately followed after. He looked up, a little distracted. "Ah, that would be my pen. Please bring your own writing utensil in the future, Mr. Jackson." Percy handed Mr. Brunner his pen. "Sir," he said, "where's Mrs. Dodds?" He stared at him blankly. "Who?" "The other chaperone. Mrs. Dodds. The pre-algebra teacher." I added. He frowned and sat forward, looking mildly concerned. "Percy, Y/N, there is no Mrs. Dodds on this trip. As far as I know, there has never been a Mrs. Dodds at Yancy Academy. Are you feeling all right?" "W-What?" "And Y/N, Mrs Rudolph is very worried about you. You just ran away all of a sudden. Your bus is about to leave." I turned to Percy reluctantly. "I'll walk you..." "This... Can't be a real..." I gasp. "Okay if this is real, then we'll never meet again and we were really just imagining things and this is a coincidence." "Agreed..." "Percy, I know what I saw. I know what I remember. We'll meet again, and when we do... I have a feeling it'll be weirder." "I'll look forward to it."

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[theprinceofflies]

Sleeping Beauty

Ship: Danti

(dapperstache, google/chase/bing implied)

~`~`~`~`~

Dark walked the halls of the long empty halls of the old castle. No empty wasn't the right word. Frozen, that was it. Almost a hundred years had gone by since it had frozen. He paused in front of the Jims. Frozen in place chasing a dog.

A cruel twist in their fate. The fairy had said they would continue to age and die before their prince could awake. She must have changed her mind. Maybe she didn't want Dark to be lonely as he stayed to protect the prince. It wasn't much though everything around him had just stopped.

Dr. Scheeplestien and Dr. Iplier were frozen in the healer's ward. Dr. Iplier focused on mixing a concoction while Dr. Scheeplestien stared out the window, awaiting everyone's fate.

Jackie and a young squire were mock duelling in the ballroom. Marvin was frozen in fear, staring at where the fairy had appeared to bring her curse to them. The Host sat in the library talking to Bim Trimmer. Yandere was staring at a well-known knight who they had fallen for.

Google was reprimanding Chase and Bing for breaking a vase. Bing and Chase seemed seconds away from attempting to 'kiss it better' while Google, as usual, didn't notice.

Illinois was in the dungeons with Yancy, laughing because Yancy got himself stuck in jail for two days. Yancy was growling as he reached for the keys on Illionses belt.

Ed was in the kitchen sneaking some food. The Chef was about two seconds away from threatening to chop his arm off.

Wilford, Darks second in command, sat at a table surrounded by other knights and guards staring at JJ, a lovesick expression stuck on his face. JJ was sighing something to Robbie, stuck in a silent laugh.

The king and queen sat at their thrones joking about something. Jack was doing finger guns while Evelien was covering her mouth, eyes filled with joy.

Now only Dark was left. Left to make sure no one got hurt because of vines or wild animals. Oh, the vines. They stretched all over the castle, seeking to strangle the inhabitants. Huge dark green thorny vines.

Dark cut one down now as it was reaching for the Jims. He continued down the hallway, reaching a tower. He didn't know how the fairy did it but she had managed to place the tower right in the centre of the castle and make it seem like it belonged there. He ascended the steps now. Something he had done every day. At the top of the tower, there was a door, leading into a well-lit room. It was already open and Dark scolded himself for it.

The Prince lay sleeping on a bed. His green hair tied in a long braid behind him. It seemed to be the one flaw in the fairies spell. The only thing that didn't pause in time. Dark just braided it and prayed he didn't have to cut it.

Anti. Dark had been his guard when he was awake. Hopelessly devoted to him as Anti said. He could recall it vividly.

"Don't be so stuck up."

Dark sighed. "Come down from the tree your majesty."

"Oh come on that fairy needs me for her spell so she's gotta keep me alive till then," Anti said giggling. Dark sighed again, that was true. "What do you say I jump."

"Your majesty you can not-"

"One two three!" Anti shouted as he jumped from the tree.

Dark caught him as he fell. "Anti!"

"Aw I know you would catch me. Hopelessly devoted is what you are." Dark didn't respond, instead, he just glared. "And did you finally learned my name hot stuff?"

Dark blushed and set him on the ground. "I apologize to your majesty."

Anti laughed. "Seriously use my name dickhead."

"Language."

"Live a little. You've got another year of me and then I'll go to sleep and wake up with a handsome prince." Anti said and leaned again the tree.

Dark sighed. "And what is this handsome prince going to look like?" Anti froze. "You always say you want blond hair and blue eyes and," he said prompting Anti.

"He's going to have black hair and dark eyes. He's going to be kind to me. He's going to love me. And I," Anti trailed off.

Dark just stared at him. That wasn't what he normally said. His next sentence was about how his future husband would have a big dick and then he would go into fits of laughter. Beautiful maniacal laughter.

Dark shook his head and smiled at him. "You'll find out in one hundred and one years."

Anti nodded, not really feeling reassured.

~-~-~-~

"Come one I hate writing lessons. The Host hates me and you know it." Anti crossed his arms and glared at Dark.

"You are not skipping your lessons," Dark said plainly.

Anti sighed. "Fine."

Dark smiled and turned around. "Well-"

"Sike!"

Dark turned around to see Anti hopping out the window. "Shit!"

~-~-~-~

Dark dragged Anti out of a bush muttering to himself. "You can skip your lesson, just don't run away again and don't tell anyone I let you skip lessons."

Anti giggled. "Yay!"

"Why are you so adamant to skip your lessons?" Dark asked, letting go of Anti.

Anti hopped up and smiled sadly. "Well in like five months I'm going to fall asleep and wake up with everyone I love dead," he trailed off.

Dark nodded. "Do you want to watch the soldiers train?"

It was one of Antis favourite things especially if Dark was in charge. But if he wasn't commanding everyone he liked watching people fight Wilford who honestly played dirty most of the time. "Hell yes!"

~-~-~-~

"Wilford!" Anti shouted, running over to the training grounds.

"Anti darling, how are you?" Wilford drawled, leaning against a fence.

"Aren't you supposed to be training?" Dark asked.

Wilford chuckled. "Yeah, but I like the view."

Dark raised an eyebrow. "It's just the castle."

Anti frowned. "Yeah, I oh," he trailed off.

Dark looked concerned. "What is it?"

"JJ's working."

Dark turned to see JJ, the royal advisors apprentice sorting papers. Wilford sighed. "Isn't he just lovely?"

"Have you even talked to him?" Anti asked smiling.

Wilford shook his head. "Have you?"

"Well, it was rather awkward. He just stared at me, smiling. It was very one way."

"He uses sign language Will," Dark said.

"I can learn sign."

Anti laughed. "You're hopeless."

Wilford giggled, his moustache twitching. "I know."

"Just promise me when I go to sleep you'll talk to him."

"I promise."

~-~-~-~

"It's tomorrow," Anti said pacing back and forth.

Dark stood in the centre of his room nodding. "I know."

Anti grabbed at his hair. "My first kiss is going to be when I'm fucking passed out."

"You could change that I'm sure one of the squires would kiss you," Dark said.

Anti glared at him. "Help me pick an outfit."

"Outfit?" Dark asked with a chuckle.

"I'm stressed, Dark! Now green or blue?" Anti asked, peering into his closet.

"Black."

Anti looked back at him. "The black suit in the back of the closet with the green trim. You've always wanted to wear it, wear it."

Anti blinked at him. "Yeah, that's a good idea."

"I'm full of good ideas Anti."

Anti smiled and nodded.

~-~-~-~

The fairy had come the next day, early in the morning, taking everyone by surprise. She pulled Anti up the stairs and then he was asleep. He did look gorgeous in the outfit.

After Anti had fallen asleep and everyone had frozen, Dark was left alone. Not able to sleep or eat, just watch and guard everyone. He supposed he should thank the fairy for sparing everyone in the castle. He supposed.

Dark jumped as a crash cut through the silence. He walked out of Antis room and closed the door. He stood in front of the oak door awaiting the stranger. Footsteps approached and a young man appeared. "Hello? Who are you? Do I need to fight you?"

The man had sort of a blue and black swirl pattern on his armour. He had blond hair and black and blue eyes. He glared at Dark and grabbed for his sword. "No, I'm the guardian of the prince. He's in his room you can pass."

"Dude you look tired." The man said tilting his head.

Dark shook his head. "What's your name?"

"Die."

"Thank you, for saving us all from this curse."

Die laughed nervously and nodded at the door. "Could you move?"

Dark stepped aside and Die walked into the room. Anti lay still as ever in the room. Die sucked in a breath. "So I kiss him?"

"Yes."

"Ok."

Die walked over to him and leaned over. Dark turned away and closed his eyes. "Um."

"What?" Dark asked.

"It's not working."

Dark blinked and turned back to him. "Did you kiss him?" he asked almost frantically.

"Yeah see?" He leaned over and kissed Anti for about five seconds before pulling away. "Not waking up."

Dark walked over to Anti, panic evident in his expression. "He has to."

Die shrugged. "I don't know dude."

"But he has to!" Dark said, staring at his friend and prince.

"Why don't you fucking kiss him then?" Die muttered.

Dark stared at him. "What?"

"Kiss him. If he's supposed to wake up then you try."

"That's not-"

Die raised an eyebrow. "I dare you."

"Fine but when you try again and he wakes up you won't breathe a word," Dark growled at the prince. "Not a word."

Die nodded.

Dark sighed and leaned over Anti. He kissed him gently, meaning for it to be a peck on the lips before he pulled away and yelled at the other prince. That was until hands gripped the back of his head, pulling him closer. Anti pulled away giggling. "Hello, hot stuff."

Dark pushed him away. "Not me, him," Dark said, pointing to Die.

Anti raised an eyebrow. "I woke up kissing you," he said pointing at Dark.

"There was an issue with the curse it took too long, he kissed you first."

Anti nodded and turned to Die who smiled at him as if he had accomplished something. "Aw, that's cute you can leave."

Die's smile vanished. "But I-"

Anti waved him off. "Shoo get out."

Die blinked rapidly. "But I-"

"No not you. I didn't wake up kissing you so it's not you getting out."

Die left the room grumbling to himself. Anti stretched and hopped out of the bed. "I don't think I'll be able to sleep for a while."

Dark nodded taking a step back. "Your majesty I-"

Anti grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him in for another kiss. "Darky please," he whispered. "Use my name."

Dark blinked at him. "What?"

Anti groaned. "Oh my god, Dark, you're my knight in shining armour. Not him."

"How-"

"Because I fell in love with you, not some rando that didn't exist when I fell asleep," Anti said waving at the door.

Dark just nodded, standing stiffly and staring at Anti. Anti grabbed his braid. "Did you do this?"

"It was messy."

Anti laughed. "You know I asked her to let me grow my hair out, I've been trying for a while. Didn't think it would be this long."

Dark nodded again. "At ease soldier," Anti said.

Dark relaxed and paused for a second before he quickly pushed Anti against a wall, kissing him deeply. Anti squeaked in surprise but returned the kiss. "I've missed you," Dark whispered, running a hand through the prince's hair.

Anti sighed. "Well, I would say I missed you two but it was a blink for me."

Dark pulled away from the prince. "We should probably make sure the others are ok."

Anti perked up. "She spared them?"

"Yes."

Anti cheered, grabbing Darks hand and running down the stairs with him. They exited the tower and saw soldiers cutting down vines that had now grown aggressive. "Anti!" Wilford said, smiling. "Do you have any idea where all these vines came from?"

Anti shook his head and turned to his guard. "Dark?"

"They grew when Anti fell asleep."

Wilford frowned. "But he's right here."

Dark nodded. "It's been a hundred years Will," he said and smiled at his old friend.

"What," Wilford whispered.

"You were frozen for a while old friend."

Wilford thought for a moment and turned to Anti. "Wait then where's your prince?"

"Right here," Anti said, hugging Darks arm.

"You?" Wilford asked pointing at Dark.

Anti nodded and Wilford squealed. "I'm so happy for you!"

"Thank you," Anti said and kissed Darks cheek.

Wilford giggled and swayed back and forth. "So Dark?"

"Yes?"

"I was frozen for a hundred years."

"Yes."

"Anti was asleep?"

"Yes, Will I don't know how this is not registering."

Wilford grinned and took off. Anti laughed and Dark stared at where he went. "Remember his promise to me? To talk to his crush? He's either gonna talk to JJ or fuck some shit up."

"I should-"

Anti grabbed his arm and pulled him down the hallway. "Oh no, you don't. We're going to talk to my parents." Dark nodded and yawned. "After that, we can go to sleep."

"I can go to sleep. I believe you and the rest of the castle will be up for the next two days."

Anti snorted. "I don't think I'll sleep for a week."

Dark laughed and smiled at the prince. "I think I'll sleep for a week."

"Don't you dare I want to talk to you."

"Ok," Dark whispered and kissed Anti on the cheek.

Anti nodded and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you for protecting me."

"You're very welcome my darling prince."

[deceptive-jo]

Merry Christmas

(The final ficlet for this...year probably! And Merry Christmas to all my celebrating followers!)

Even the numerous inhabitants of Egotropolis celebrate Christmas in their very own way, with their families and friends. Let’s take a look around the houses, shall we?

Words: 1922

Ships: The Author x Actor Marc; Darkstache; Marvin x JBM

“Merry Christmas!” Mad Mike slid into the living room, clearly exited to already be getting presents. “What in the heavens are you wearing?” Author’s shocked expression was exactly what he had tried to achieve and Mike looked down on himself. His sweatpants were a simple light blue but his sweater could be a bit...much with its blues and pinks. “You look like you slapped the Trans pride flag in there and then dumped a gallon of glitter on it.” Admittedly that was pretty much what had happened after he asked Bim for help… Marc threw his arm around him, in his own nightmare of a red Christmas sweater, “I for one like it. Good job on that, kid.” He ruffled his already unruly hair before falling down next to his fiance. Mike preferred a place on the floor, with direct view over the presents. Author’s were already in his room, having gotten them on the end of his holiday celebrations (an USB-stick from Anti which’s content still no one knew, though it was certainly not due lack of trying on Marc’s side, and a Death Note from Mike- a hilarious joke they were sure but considering their connections Author couldn’t be too sure). The lights on the tree flickered for a moment before Anti glitched into the room, red and green lights flickering in his hair. Well, you took what you got and at least he was enjoying himself. “When’s that brother of yours supposed to arrive?” “Any moment now, surely”, a voice came from the entrance where the Host entered. The room seemed to light up as Author jumped over backrest of the couch and pulled his brother in a hug. “Glad you could make it”, Actor smiled as he passed him a glass of eggnog. “Merry Christmas everyone.”

~~~

Darkiplier and Wilford Warfstache were awoken by the sound of rapid knocking on their bedroom door. “It’s Christmas morning, get up!” Dark could only burrow his head deeper in the pillows, “Just wait, we’ll be out in a moment.” They could almost see Bim dramatically draped against the door when he answered, “I’ve waited one whole year. If you’re not down in ten minutes we start without you!” Slowly Dark lifted his head, hairs askew, “This boy, I swear-”

Exactly ten minutes later the couple entered the sitting room, with its enormous tree and the pile of presents underneath. Bim looked like he should be held back and as soon as he saw the two Egos enter he bolted forward, only to get tripped by Yancy. “Youse need to chill!” Wilford watched the scene fondly, Bim somehow managed to pull half the Egos into his enthusiasm and now the Jims and Illinois ere figuratively vibrating with excitement (Bing was literally vibrating next to Google which was disturbing to say the least). “Okay, go on-”, he hadn’t even finished before Bim surged forward and began handing presents out in light-speed. The whirlwind only stopped when the Host, so far clearly light-asleep next to Dr Iplier, got hit into the chest with what was probably another note book (they could be glad Bim decided against throwing the box that turned out to be a new typewriter). Egos began opening presents, either tearing into them like small kids (the Jims and King, mainly) or slowly unwrapping and folding the paper together again (the Googles and Yancy). Dark nearly got strangled when Bim thanked him for the new set of ties while Wilford next to him was too busy examining the dagger that had been sent from the Cabin. Google was fiddling with some new gadget, judging by the accompanied message in clean letters on gold-white paper it came from the Mind Palace. Bing looked over his shoulder while trying to pay attention to Chase’s present at the same time. The Host turned towards the demon, pulling his attention away from the gold-black journal- no, scrapbook- he was holding. “A merry Christmas.” “It is indeed.”

~~~

"Holy shit, now that's a tree!" Jackie stared in amazement at the giant Christmas tree that filled up half of the open living room. Marvin turned around from where he was letting the last ornaments float into position, "Good Morning, darling." "Morning", the hero pressed a kiss on his boyfriend's cheek, "you did an amazing job. How long have you been working on this?" "Pretty much all night", the magician wiped off the sweat and slipped his mask back on. "You must be tired. Tea?" "Coffee..." He chuckled dryly when the cup was pressed in his hands. "Oh wow, this looks so cool! Uncle Marvin did you do this?", Connor came running into the room, his sister close behind. "Sure did, glad you like it, kid." "This is great for celebrating- can we open our presents now?" Chase came down the stairs and began leading them towards the dining table, "Nah, first breakfast, then presents." Ashley pouted but sat down and waited patiently until everyone had finished their christmas pnacakes before she jumped out of her chair and rushed towards the heap of presents. The others followed in a calmer pace (if only to annoy her a bit) and to her credit she waited until everyone was seated before reaching for the first present.

Surprisingly enough Ashley didn't open it but instead got up and handed the small box over to Jameson. Four more packages followed and once every adult had a wrapped box in their hands she looked at them excited. "Go on, open them!" The wrapping wasn't very neat but you could see the effort put into it and a moment later Marvin held a small item in his hand. A strangled noise escaped him as he stared down on the handmade bracelet. It wasn't anywhere near as high-quality as his usual accessories but he could see its aura, could feel the love radiating off of it. Looking over he recognised similiar bracelets in his brothers' hands. Jackie and Jameson were looking utterly delighted and over-joyed, while Chase and Henrik smiled, there were clearly tears shining in their eyes. "I made us family bracelets! Connor and I have our own already-" Chase didn't wait to pull his kids into a tight hug, his brothers joining right after. "I love you, sunshine, so much." "I love you too, daddy. Merry Christmas."

~~~

The Crankgameplays Mansion was bustling with energy, if a  bit different than the manor’s. All the Egos were seated in the living room, enjoying a movie marathon when a chime echoed from the kitchen. “Oh Blank, the cookies!”, Mrs Thomson looked up from her brochure at the dark ego who was already slipping out of the room. A mere minute later he returned with a plate piled with cookies. “Oh damn, those smell awesome!” Bernice snatched a cookie away, painted red and green nails matching with the green designer sweater she was wearing. “And they taste delicious. Good job, boy”, Father Ethan patted Blank’s shoulder as he fell back into his chair, but now with a small smile grazing his lips. The next hour or so passed in peaceful silence as the family followed the movie and enjoyed their cookies and hot chocolate. But of course it was interrupted when Mc Gee cam tumbling down the stairs from where he must have been decorating the roof, as he usually did. “They’re coming!”

Mrs Thomson rose with a shriek and rushed to the nearby mirror, nearly pushing Bernice out of the way. “Oh god already? They’re early for once- How does my hair look?” “Nice, my dear. Don’t stress yourself on this peaceful day”, Father Ethan once again made no indication to get up when the doorbell rang but luckily the Postman was already in place. “Well hello there, Gentlemen. Looking fine today!” “How dare you, I always look fine!” Mrs Thomson had to smile at the teasing, oh how she adored her grandchildren. Speaking of- the entrance hall was filled with people, taking off their jackets and shoes and shaking out the snow-filled hair. One of the black-haired men was standing in the middle, still in his coat and clearly struggling with the package in his arms. “Oh, let me help you!” With a surprising swiftness the old lady took the box from his hands. The young man’s eyes lit up, “Mrs Thomson, how wonderful to see you. You look lovely as always”, he bowed down for a light kiss on the knuckles. “You’re impossible, Author!” She hit him playfully on his shoulder but couldn’t hide the blush at his attitude. “You know me, I’m an old man after all- Marc were are the presents?” A hand reached out of the mass of people and a pile of wrapped gifts floated into the living room. “You brought presents?” “Yeah, you got some as well, we planned ahead this time”, Mike tumbled out of a group hug with his brothers and came over to greet her, “Merry Christmas, grandma!” With a smile she send him in the living room to follow Author into the kitchen. The writer was rummaging through the cabins, “Where are the plates in this house?” “What’s in the box?” “Uh...a cake, the Gingerbread house Mike failed to deliver...Sufganiyot from me and Rugelach because Host made too many- Aha!”, when Author finally re-emerged with enough plates the female Ego looked like she was about to faint. So many baked goods!

Once they entered the living room with their for plates everyone else had settled down around the  TV. Blank was trapped between Mike (chatting with the postman) and McGee, looking peaceful and happy for once. Marc was already in an animated conversation with Bernice and Father Ethan (he was about to snap his neck, should probably stop that) while Anti was hanging around Yandere. Mrs Thomson teared up at the rare sight of her whole family together and joyful, untroubled by their problems for once. A large warm hand came to rest on her frail shoulders. “Merry Christmas, Oma.”

~~~

The view from the Mind Palace was always magnificent but now that the sun was setting and reflecting the snow covering the hills one last time it nearly looked magical. So Roman was sitting at one of the large windows and painted. He’d gotten new brushes after all, those should be tested! The whole atmosphere was soothing. The Christmas tree and few candles were the only source of light while the full room offered enough light for Roman to draw, while Virgil played some slow song on the piano. Logan relaxed on one of the couches enjoying his newest book and the rare quietness. Janus was over by the tree crafting something that was either a simple wooden statue or a doomsday device (depending on which of his acquaintances sent it). He was completely emerged in the gift- where those tears shining in his face? Roman shook his head and decided not to stare too much. He did however exchange the canvas for a new one to turn the easel around and instead began to draw the group in front of him. Where the first four Sides were keeping to themselves and savouring the last hours of Christmas, Patton and Remus were huddled together on a love seat, with the dad Side nearly slipping off, while Remus had draped himself over the back rest. They were giggling over something on his phone while Patton’s lighted up constantly with all the Christmas wishes he must be receiving. Roman allowed himself a short sincere smile. Merry Christmas.

[nevernotwriting]

You, Me, and Yancy | Chapter 10: Of Prisoners and Men

Read me on AO3!

Previous chapter

“Come on, come on, pick up,” you grumbled, gritting your teeth as you paced back and forth along the grass. The line continued ringing until it was suddenly cut off by a deep, tired voice.

“… Zero?”

The anger running through your veins stilled the second you heard him.

“… Mark?”

There was a pause as Mark registered your voice. When he spoke again, he was choked with surprise.

“Is that really you?”

“Yeah. It’s me.”

“Oh my god, you have no idea how happy I am to hear from you!” His words were strained, making your throat clench. “How did you get out?!”

You forced your eyes to keep away from the prison gate. “I… I had some help. Listen, d’you think you could pick me up? There’s no one out here.”

“Yeah, yeah of course. I think the prison’s about twenty-five minutes from my place. Can you sit tight? I’ll be as fast as I can.”

“Sure.” You swallowed past the lump in your throat, quickly hanging up. Now that he was actually on his way, your anger and nerves were slowly returning. You took deep breaths in and out and sat down on the curb, wringing your hands together as you waited.

Sure enough, a pair of headlights approached from the distance just over twenty minutes later. You stood up carefully, one hand on your lower torso where you could feel your bandages coming loose after your chaotic escape. You pocketed your phone and the key as the car came to an abrupt stop, brakes squeaking on the tarmac. Mark jumped out, locking eyes with you. The relief you’d heard in his voice on the phone was matched with his expression as he strode towards you, and the ice surrounding your heart began to melt again.

You didn’t even manage a hello before he wound his arms around you, more conscious of your injury this time. He spoke softly into your ear.

“Are you all right?”

You nodded in his gentle hold. “Yeah, I’m all right.”

Mark withdrew his grasp, smiling at you. You briefly smiled back.

“Let’s get going then, before it gets too cold,” you said, hopping into the car. Mark followed you, getting into the driver’s seat. You leant back against the headrest as the prison disappeared in the side mirror. Your stomach swam with a myriad of unspoken words and mixed-up feelings, your head feeling the same. Not knowing quite what to say or do, you stayed silent.

That was until something occurred to you that made your head snap upright. “Ah, shit.”

Mark glanced away from the road. “What’s wrong?”

“My apartment keys. They’re in my desk drawer at HQ. And my car’s still there, damn it.”

There was silence for a few seconds as Mark pursed his lips in thought.

“It’s pretty late now. If you want, you can stay at my place and we can head to HQ tomorrow?”

Your face soured at the thought of having to face Shark, but you knew it had to be done. “Okay.”

“How’s your side?” Mark asked, looking down at your torso.

“It’s fine.”

Mark frowned. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah.”

The remainder of the car journey was awkwardly quiet, leaving you plenty of time to stew in your thoughts. Words were brewing at your lips by the time you got to Mark’s place. He sensed your mood as he directed you into his spare room, where tension filtered into the air like thick fog.

“Bathroom’s down the hall on the right if you want a shower, there’s some bandages in the medicine cabinet too.”

“Thanks.”

Mark nodded with a small smile, leaving you to it.

You decided to take a shower first, hoping the steam and hot water would clear your head, but all it did was intensify your emotions as you stood under the stream like a statue. You stared at the floor as the water ran down your face and dripped from the edge of your nose, swirling down the drain. By the time you had finished and returned to the spare room, the bedding was made up for use and one of Mark’s shirts and a pair of joggers were folded on top of it. You scoffed stubbornly, not wanting to wear them but knowing it was better than the prison rags you’d been wearing for the past few days.

With fresh clothes on you made your way into the kitchen, following the faint smell of herbal tea. Mark was pouring hot water into two mugs as you came in. He smiled warmly at you as you entered, but you quickly averted your gaze to the floor.

“The pants don’t fit quite right,” you remarked, fiddling with the drawstring.

Mark chuckled as he slid a mug towards you across the counter top, taking a sip from his own. “Good thing they’re adjustable. You can keep ‘em if you want.”

You didn’t reply, busying yourself by cupping your hands around the hot drink. Steam rose from the surface. You stared as it danced around and disappeared over and over. Tension still bubbled inside you.

Mark put his mug down with a sharp clatter. You looked at him, biting the inside of your lip.

“I’m so glad you’re okay,” he breathed, smiling and reaching a hand out towards you.

You took a step back from him. A look of hurt and concern immediately struck his face.

“What’s wrong?”

The tension finally reached your throat, making it clench yet again. Your question was quiet when it emerged, every word tinged with hurt.

“Were you even gonna come back for me?”

Mark stared at you in disbelief. “Wha-”

“If I hadn’t called, would you have come back for me?” The words were louder this time, tears filling your eyes. You blinked them back stubbornly.

“Of course! I was going to, I-”

“Then why didn’t you? I saw the security footage, Mark, you just wandered off and left me!” You scowled at him, anger and hurt filling every fibre of your being. Mark blinked at you, dropping his head to the floor with a gentle sigh.

“Look, I was gonna come back for you, I was working on a plan. But Shark really chewed me out for failing the heist, she’s been piling on assignments and I’ve barely slept cause I’ve been thinking about how to get you-”

You cut him off with an astonished noise somewhere between laughter and a gasp. “So Shark was willing to just cut me out?!”

“This has happened to rookies before, Zero! But I wasn’t gonna let it happen to you!” Mark retorted, desperation clear in his eyes.

“That doesn’t make it okay.” You shook your head at him, tears finally falling down your cheeks. “I’ll go in and get my stuff tomorrow, but… I might have to start looking at other options.”

Realisation dawned across Mark’s face. “If you talk to Shark, she’ll have you back. I don’t doubt it. Even after we failed the heist, she has to know the team wouldn’t be the same without you.”

You pinched the bridge of your nose, trying to weigh up your options faster than your brain would allow. Words emerged before you had time to take them back.

“We didn’t fail the heist.”

Your eyes met Mark’s again. He frowned in confusion. “But the artefact-”

“I got it back, before I got out. It’s a skeleton key.”

Mark’s eyes lit up with a spark. “No way, I’ve heard of those before! This is incredible! We can use this, Shark has to let you back in after she sees you have it-”

“No.”

He blinked. “What do you mean?”

“There’s no way I’m letting her have it, not after this. Besides, I know someone who deserves it more.”

Yet more confusion spread over his face. “Who?”

You took a deep breath, lowering your gaze and your voice along with it.

“There’s a prisoner at Happy Trails, his name is Yancy. He helped break me out, and he doesn’t deserve to be in there. I wanna do the same for him.”

You looked back up at Mark, heart hammering. Mark was staring at you blankly, lost in complete bewilderment as he tried to process your words.

“Right, so, let me get this straight,” he started, running a hand through his hair. “You wanna break some guy out of prison, who you’ve known for like three days, because… why, exactly?”

“He’s not just some guy!” You protested. “He was sweet, and I wouldn’t have made it out if it weren’t for him. And like I said, he doesn’t deserve to be in there. He really doesn’t.”

Mark scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Didn’t realise you had a thing for bad boys.”

“Hey, that’s not fair,” you snapped, pointing a finger at Mark. “You don’t know him. He’s not that bad.”

Mark gestured wildly, his eyes wide. “He’s a criminal!”

“And what are we, then?”

Mark stammered, summoning any words to get you to listen. “How do you know he’s not just using you to get out?”

You glared at him, clenching your jaw. “He’s not. He knows the way out.”

“Then don’t you think he’d get himself out if he wanted to?”

Your eyes lost their fire as Mark raised an eyebrow at you. You grumbled and shook your head, draining the last of your drink and stomping over to the sink.

“I have to at least try,” you mumbled, filling the mug with water and hoping the small action would distract from the lingering tension and heartache in the room.

Silence. Mark sighed gently, running a hand down his face. You glanced at the calendar pinned up on the fridge.

“He told me visitation is every third Sunday. That should be the day after tomorrow. I’m going to see him, whether you’re with me or not.”

There was another eternal pause, until Mark spoke once more. “Okay.”

You turned to him. He attempted a smile, glancing at the floor.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’m with you. I don’t really get it, but… I’m with you.”

You stared at each other. There was a sincerity in his expression that sent a crack through your heart. You cleared your throat and nodded.

“Thanks.” The word fell cold and flat, only adding to the sombre atmosphere. You averted your gaze and trudged out of the kitchen, leaving Mark alone.

“Hey Zero?” He called.

You turned back around, standing in the doorway. He leaned against the counter top with his hands entwined, looking at the floor again.

“I’m guessing cause of this, you… won’t have time for our date this weekend?”

Your heart sank as he dared a glance up at you. He looked exhausted. You sighed, shaking your head.

“Sorry, Mark. I just don’t think now’s a good time.”

Mark nodded, pressing his lips into a thin line. “No, yeah, I understand. Sleep well. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah... see you tomorrow.”

 There were no words exchanged between you and Mark the next morning on your way to HQ, only stolen glances and tired sighs. You thanked him for the ride as you came to a stop, jumping out of the car before the awkward atmosphere consumed you. Mark called out of his window just before you disappeared inside.

“Hey, let me know how it goes tomorrow, yeah? Call me if you need help.”

You stopped and gave him a nod, still confused as to why he was so willing to help you. The crunch of gravel under tyres sounded as you entered the building.

You wasted no time in striding to your desk, retrieving your keys and pocketing them. When you turned around, two familiar figures were watching you from close by, making you stop in your tracks.

Shrike and Gareth were stood together, staring at you in amazement. You sighed as you sauntered over to them, thinking you’d be able to slip in and out easily on a Saturday. Apparently not.

Shrike was the first to speak. “Heard you got shot.”

You nodded. “Yep.”

Gareth scoffed. “No way. You were just using any excuse to spend more time with Mark, rookies don’t make it back after getting shot.”

Anger and impatience bubbled inside you. “Guess I’m not a rookie anymore then.”

Shrike laughed, raising her eyebrows. “Relax, he’s just teasing. You get yourself out of prison?”

You sighed and rolled your eyes. You didn’t have time for this.

“No, a magical fairy broke me out.”

Shrike looked taken aback. “Jeez, what crawled up your butt and died?”

“Look, I only came in for my keys. I’m going back home. You can tell Shark I’ll be back in on Monday… probably.”

“Woah, hold on,” Gareth began, taking a step closer to you with an amused smile. “First you fail the heist, then you get yourself stuck in prison, and now you show up just to say you might not be coming back? You’ve got some nerve, kid.”

“Unless you think this,” you lifted your shirt, revealing the layers of bandage still wrapped around you, “means I’m in a fit state to stick around and explain myself to everyone who’s in today, then I’ll be going home.”

Shrike and Gareth stared at your bandage, eyes widening. Gareth took a step back, muttering an apology under his breath.

“Shit. Well…” Shrike spoke for the two of them, concern filling her eyes possibly for the first time ever. “Look after yourself, Zero. I’ll give Shark the low-down.”

“Thank you.”

“See you Monday, kiddo?” Gareth asked.

“Sure, whatever.”

 You breathed a sigh of relief as you walked back into your apartment. It felt like you’d been gone for an eternity, but in reality, it was only a few days, and everything was just as you’d left it. The clock still ticked gently on the mantlepiece. The fridge was still humming. The tap in the bathroom still dripped every few minutes from when you’d not turned it off tight enough. You turned it now, looking at your reflection in the mirror.

Your eyes were heavily hooded, with slight bags underneath them. A withered smile appeared on your face as you tried to lighten your mood, but you couldn’t fool yourself. You looked exactly how you felt; drained.

Realising you were still wearing Mark’s borrowed clothes, you wrestled out of them and jumped in the shower, allowing the water to clear your head so you could hatch a plan for your visit to Yancy.

Next chapter

[hollowempire]

Past || Yancy x Reader

Reader: Yancy/Reader where he's SadBoiHours and she comes into his cell and they cuddle,,, maybe,,, k ,i ss,,, sn,ug gle // give us that sweet sweet yancy x reader hurt/comfort

Summary: Reader finds Yancy upset in his cell after he is reminded of the past.

Word Count: 932

Warning: Mentions of abuse and murder

The main area in Happy Trails penitentiary was quiet. Too quiet.

It was confusing to everyone, but they couldn’t figure out why and just went on with their lives.

Y/n, on the other hand, knew immediately. Usually among the quiet chatter of the prisoners there was one loud, booming voice. Yancy’s. But today he wasn’t talking, he wasn’t singing, nothing. He wasn’t there to keep the room alive, which left y/n worried. Yancy was never absent from anything.

From her spot at a table in the corner, y/n took a look around the room and spotted the overemotional guard. Thank God he was on duty at that time.. She had built up some rapport with him and his sensitive personality meant she had a good shot at leaving to look for Yancy.

Y/n got up and traveled to the opposite side of the room where the guard stood next to the door.

“Hello,” she greeted sweetly.

“Oh, hello!” he said with enthusiasm, overjoyed at the fact that a prisoner was talking to him. He didn’t get to socialize much and everyone else hated him because he was a guard, and the actual guards though he was too nice to the prisoners.

“How has your day been so far?” it was a boring topic and y/n didn’t actually care, but she couldn’t just ask him to go right away.

“It’s been the same as always, a bit boring here...”

Y/n chuckled. “You can say that again,” she paused. “I need a favor.”

“What is it?”

“I can’t see my friend and I’m getting worried something awful has happened,” y/n explained, putting emphasis on every other word. “Do you think I could go see where he is?”

The guard considered her request for a moment. She did look and sound genuinely upset.

“Yeah, okay.” he said and gestured to the door with his hand. Y/n nodded gratefully and walked out, speeding off towards where Yancy’s cell was.

“Yancy?” she called as she walked down the hall to where his cell was. “Yancy,” she said softer upon seeing him curled on in his bed. He was facing the wall and didn’t turn around to acknowledge her. She carefully opened the door and walked over to his bed.

“What are you doing here?” he asked quietly, his voice scratchy. He had been crying.

“I couldn’t find you and I got worried,” y/n said. Yancy tensed up a but when he felt her hand on his shoulder, but relaxed as she began rubbing it up and down the upper half of his back.

“Is it okay if I lay down?” she asked. Yancy nodded and moved over. Y/n got into bed, wrapping her arms around him from behind and pressing a light kiss to the back of his neck.

“Wanna tell me what’s wrong?” she asked.

Yancy shook his head. “Not yet,” he told her, tightening his grip on the teddy bear he cradled in his arms.

“Okay,”

Yancy then turned around to face y/n. For the first time that day she saw his face. She reached her hand up to wipe away the tears that ran from his red, puffy eyes and down his face. Some had already managed to soak his shirt and likely pillow. Y/n pulled him into her chest and they lay there for a while, y/n occasionally whispering words of endearment to him as she ran her fingers across his back.

“It’s my father,” y/n heard Yancy mumble after quite some time had passed. “Or at least the memory of him and what he used to do to me,”

“Oh, Yancy...”

He moved away from y/n and say up so he could actually speak without it being muffled by her shirt.

“He was a bad, bad man,” he said. His accent was toned down a bit and he was crying again, voice breaking as he spoke. “I didn’t kill him for no reason, you know,”

“I know, Yancy, I do,” she reassured him as she sat up and took his hands in hers.

“He used to hit us, both me and mom,” he continued. “and I couldn’t help her, if I did I’d get the beating instead. One day he went too far and killed her... and I killed him.”

Y/n listened to his story. He had never told her this before, only every saying he murdered his parents.

“It’s my fault she’s dead... killed them both.. my fault...”

“Yancy!”

“Yeah...?”

Y/n held out her arms and Yancy eagerly collapsed into them, letting his bear fall to the side and clinging to y/n.

“Yancy, can you look at me?”

Slowly but surely, he loosened his hold on y/n’s torso and backed away just enough to look at her. She gave him a comforting smile and kissed is cheek, to which Yancy responded with a more aggressive one on the lips.

“Thank you for listening,” he said, and plopped back down on the bed as though whole thing was normal.

Y/n raised an eyebrows, but lay back down as well and went back to cuddling him. Only this time they could both relax in each other’s arms without having to worry about anything else... or so they thought.

The guard that had let y/n go search for Yancy now came down the hall and stopped at the bars. At the sight of the two cuddle up in his tiny bed made his heart melt, enough to make him shed tears of joy as he walked away. They were right not to worry. They had each other there and that was all that mattered.

[caustic-synishade]

Freedom

An angst short fic! 

Yancy yanked the chains that were holding him in place. He was standing in the center of the cement brick room, arms strung above him and ankles chained in place. His arms and legs ached, as he’d been there for hours, alone in the room. The winged man groaned, tugging harder at the chains, hoping he could slip his wrists through. But he couldn’t. The metal was too tightly cuffed. He sighed.

The door behind him opened with a creak, then quickly shut, “Hello again, Yancy.”

“Are you’s gonna let me out now?” the winged man was ansty. He was just tired and wanted to lay down now. Maybe focus on escape again later.

“No, not yet,” the warden appeared in front of him, “You still haven’t had your punishment.”

“I thought this was… I’s been here so long, Mr. Murderslaughter...” Yancy whined, tugging on his chains. His wings fluttered anxiously.

Mr. Murderslaughter smiled, walking up to the winged man and patting his head, “Don’t worry, we’re just about to begin. Now, you’re not gonna miss your wings are ya?”

“What?” Yancy perked up, “Wh-What do you mean?” 

“Y’see, I’m getting real tired of your escape attempts. And something needs to be done about it,” the warden smiled.

“I’ll be good, I’ll be good!” Yancy was in a panic now. Whatever the warden was implying, he did NOT like it.

“I know you will. We just have to take care of this little problem first,” Mr. Murderslaughter walked behind the winged man as he fluttered his wings. 

“Please,” Yancy whined, struggling in the chains, “Please, whatever you’s about to do, please don’t-”

“Shh, Yancy, shh. You won’t miss them. Trust me, within time? You’ll act like you never had them!” The warden spoke.

“Please!” the winged man screamed as a hand touched his wing. 

“Once we’re done, you’re never gonna want to be free,” Mr. Murderslaughter plucked a feather, letting it fall to the ground.

That’s when Yancy heard the buzz of a saw. God no, god no, god no. A scream escaped his lips as he felt the teeth of the blade dig into his flesh. It tore and ate, digging right through his skin and muscle and eventually, his bone. Before long, his wing was held on only by stretched skin.

Tears streamed down his face as he howled in distress. Oh god, the pain. It shot from the wound down his spine. Radiating pure and utter agony. The one winged man squirmed and fought, but soon, the wing fell with a thunk to the ground. 

“And now, for the other one!” Mr. Murderslaughter said cheerfully, hand grasping onto the other wing.

“Stop! Stop, oh god, stop!” Yancy screamed as the saw started up again.

The teeth once again began to work, sawing quickly through his flesh and bone. Blood  was pooled on the ground below the man. He almost slipped, but the chains kept him in place. Before long, the other wing hit the ground. All that was left were small nubs that he wiggled helplessly. 

“And there we go! All done, son,” Mr. Murderslaughter returned to view, blood splattered across his face and glasses. 

All Yancy could feel was pain and the blood rushing from his wounds. He felt lightheaded, sick, disgusted. His wings, gone, just like that. His freedom, gone. 

“I think I’m gonna display these in my office, what do you think?” the warden beamed.

Yancy just cried, whining and moaning in agony. Only sobbing and screaming. 

...

“Now, do you want to be free?” Mr. Murderslaughter asked, cupping his chin in his hand.

“N-No…” The wingless man cried out.

“Say it.” 

“I don’t… I don’t wanna be free..”

[bing-fucker]

Illinois gets hit by an aphrodisiac when adventuring because of course he does. Only he's kinda used to it by now to keep enough of his upstairs brain to really, really not want to 'pressure' Yancy into anything when he can't control how rough he'll get. Meanwhile Yancy is about five minutes away from literally begging Illinois to fuck him as hard and nasty as he wants. (And it's not just cause denying the aphrodisiac might kill him, he just wants it rough) - 🐧

This is the second time I have written a fic that involves Illinois getting hit with an aphrodisiac during an adventure and then refuses to let Yancy help until he gets really desperate, so I think this is just a trend with Illinois. And, personally, I adore it. My favorite trope with aphrodisiacs is when the person hit with them hides it until they’re practically mindless. Weak ending, so I’m sorry

Warnings: Aphrodisiacs, outdoors sex, sex pollen, desperation, rough-sex, bondage, barely negotiated safewords, excessive cumming, cum eating. As always, ask me to add any necessary warnings!

Since the last couple of times Illinois went on an adventure with Yancy, he’d gotten more comfortable with the idea. He liked adventuring with the former prisoner now since Yancy was getting more and more open to it and was willing to do more exciting adventures. Like hunting for treasure. It was more Magnum’s thing and while Illinois would love the idea of going an adventure with the pirate (and maybe there were other reasons Illinois would love Magnum to go on an adventure with him and Yancy, but that was really because their adventures tended to end in sex and Illinois maybe enjoyed the idea of Yancy squirming on Magnum’s giant cock), Yancy didn’t like the ocean.

So here they were, in a giant field, Yancy holding a map as Illinois randomly walked around poking giant flowers. Yancy was trying to read the map and find out where the treasure was that Illinois wanted to find. Which is why Illinois was just wandering around at random instead of maybe helping his boyfriend try and read the map.

Illinois cocked his head at the flower in front of him. It was big and bright pink, sparkling pollen floating around it. It smelled like cigarettes and hair gel and makeup and... Yancy. Illinois blinked in confusion at the smell, looking between the flower and his boyfriend.

“Weird...”

And, as he always did with weird things, Illinois poked the center of the flower. Immediately, a fuck-ton of the pollen fell off the flower and covered Illinois in it entirely. Illinois blinked and looked down at himself for a second before doubling over as a sharp pang of pain and arousal shot through his body. It was like every nerve was on fire and Illinois was desperately trying to brush off all the pollen, but it was all over and every brush against his already rock hard cock felt like it was going to send him over the edge.

“Hey, Noisy, are youse okay?” Yancy asked, walking over to Illinois and gently touching his shoulder. Illinois took a deep breath to hide a moan, standing and turning to Yancy.

“I’m fine!” Illinois replied, a bit overwhelmed at having Yancy so close. Yancy was gorgeous. Yancy was always beautiful, of course. That was just a fact of life. The Earth went around the sun, water was wet, and Yancy was the most beautiful person to ever exist. But right now, Yancy was more than beautiful and Illinois just wanted to bend him over and fuck him until Yancy was completely unable to walk or think about anything but Illinois’ cock. Which was something that they’d have in common, given that Illinois could barely think past his cock as well.

Illinois had been hit with aphrodisiacs before. Hell, the first time Yancy went on an adventure, Illinois had been hit with an aphrodisiac. But Illinois had never been so thoroughly covered in pollen like that and already it was getting difficult to pay attention to what Yancy was saying.

“Illinois?” Yancy asked, gently shaking his shoulder. Illinois leaned into the hand on his shoulder, moaning softly as pleasure seemed to radiate from the point of contact.

“Hey, Illi, maybe we should stop for the day,” Yancy said, blushing at the moan and the clear tent in Illinois’ pants.

“No, no, it’s okay,” Illinois assured, licking his lips lightly and imagining the feeling of Yancy’s lips wrapped around his cock, his throat spasming and tightening as Illinois practically choked him with his cock.

“Oh, Jesus,” Illinois muttered because wow. That was a lot rougher than Illinois had ever done with Yancy or even fantasized about with him. And it was a little bit concerning that that was what got Illinois’ cock weeping precum.

“Let’s just get going,” he eventually said, biting his lip harshly and imagining bruises littering Yancy’s thighs and ass.

“I really think we should stop for the time,” Yancy said, taking Illinois hand as they walked. Illinois groaned, nearly overwhelmed with the image and desire to pin Yancy’s hands above his head so he couldn’t move.

“I’m okay,” Illinois assured, lifting Yancy’s hand and kissing it gently. And then getting distracted and started to suck on one of Yancy’s fingers.

“M-maybe we should pause to help you calm down,” Yancy said, eyelashes fluttering weakly at the feeling of Illinois’ tongue sliding between his fingers.

“I’m good,” Illinois replied, letting go of Yancy’s hand before he completely lost control of himself.

It was fine for a few more hours. Well. If you consider “fine” to be Illinois constantly fantasizing about fucking Yancy in the roughest ways possible and Yancy still trying to find the treasure. Illinois stumbled slightly, sitting heavily on the ground and groaning unhappily.

“Illi,” Yancy said, kneeling next to Illinois and gently touching his shoulder. “Please, let me help youse, Illi. I hate seeing youse in pain like this.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Illinois panted, gripping one of Yancy’s wrists tightly. Yancy bit his lip and gently placed his other hand against the tent in Illinois’ pants, grinning at the adventurer’s moan. Illinois was harder than Yancy had ever felt him before and he was pretty sure Illinois must be in pain from it.

“I want youse to,” Yancy whispered, pulling Illinois’ whip off his belt. “I want youse to fuck me, Illi, harder than youse ever have before-”

Illinois groaned and shoved Yancy down onto the ground, rolling over on top of him and grinding his cock against Yancy’s thigh. Yancy gasped softly, whining and bucking up against Illinois as the adventurer grabbed his whip and tied the former prisoner’s hands above his head. Illinois growled and pulled away, roughly pulling Yancy’s clothes off before pulling his own off.

Illinois’ cock was standing straight up against his stomach. It was red and angry and weeping precum and Yancy had never wanted Illinois to slam him against the ground more than he did at that very moment. Illinois tightened the whip until Yancy gasped, bucking up.

“Noisy, please,” Yancy gasped, his own cock hard against his thigh.

“You want me to stop, you say monkey,” Illinois growled, settling himself on Yancy’s chest, his cock pressing against Yancy’s lips. “You can’t talk, hit your hands on the ground twice. Got it?”

“Got it,” Yancy agreed, moaning softly. Illinois nodded and gripped Yancy’s jaw open, pushing his cock into the performer’s mouth and moaning as he immediately came, pumping hot cum down Yancy’s throat. It always felt good to have his dick sucked, but this was different. Maybe it was because he was so sensitive or maybe it was because of the pollen or maybe it was the adrenaline of taking Yancy so roughly, but it felt better than ever.

Yancy moaned and started sucking happily, hollowing his cheeks and moaning at the hot weight of Illinois’ cock on his tongue. Illinois moaned and gripped Yancy’s hair, fucking his mouth ruthlessly. Yancy moaned, arching his back and kicking his legs at the unexpected pleasure of having Illinois use him like this. Illinois groaned deeply and tugged on Yancy’s hair roughly, pushing his cock as far down Yancy’s throat as he could as he came. Yancy whimpered softly, tears and leaking down his face. Illinois moaned, pressing his hips right against Yancy’s face as he came, the spasming of Yancy’s throat drawing more and more out of him.

Illinois eventually pulled away, panting heavily and dragging his thumb across Yancy’s swollen bottom lip.

“I’m sorry,” Illinois muttered, climbing off of Yancy before settling between the former prisoner’s legs, folding Yancy’s knees against his chest.

“Don’t be,” Yancy replied, licking his lips. His voice was rough from Illinois fucking his throat. “I want youse to do this, Noisy. I want youse to take me~”

“Oh, fuck,” Illinois groaned, brutally thrusting into Yancy’s hole. Yancy moaned loudly in a mix of pain and pleasure, arching his back. Illinois moaned, almost immediately starting to fuck Yancy into the ground. Yancy whimpered as he came, squeezing his eyes shut tightly.

Illinois paused and gently stroked Yancy’s cheek. “God, you’re beautiful,” he complimented. “Shit, Yance, I’m sorry. I should really be more careful.”

“What, with sex or just in general?” Yancy replied, panting heavily and looking at Illinois.

“Both,” Illinois replied, gently kissing Yancy and rolling his hips gently. Yancy moaned softly and pulled Illinois closer.

“I love youse,” Yancy breathed.

“I love you, too,” Illinois replied. “And I swear to you that after this I’m gonna buy you a five-star hotel and pamper the shit outta you, but right now I really just want to fuck you until you can’t think. Is that okay?”

“God, fuck, yes!” Yancy moaned.

A few hours later, Yancy and Illinois stumbled into their hotel dirty, sweaty, and absolutely exhausted. Illinois just waved a brief hello to the receptionist, saying something about falling down a hill. Yancy laughed briefly when they got in the hotel, immediately making for the bathroom to clean himself.

“Yeah, I’m gonna be more careful,” Illinois decided, watching Yancy limp to the bathroom and feeling much better now that the aphrodisiacs were worn off. “Yance, start the bath, I want to join!”

[sparklingopalite]

Celestial Gatherings ( Yancy x Reader )

A/N: Requested by @warlockandk3y​

Summary: Nights are the best time to make your moves. Word count: 800+

 The stars were beautiful - to say at the very least. They sang symbolic songs to people that resided on this earth, simply through their symbols. One of the constellations that caught your attention, was Orion. Orion held two of the ten brightest stars in our galaxy - Rigel and Betelguese. Orion tended to face head on of another constellation - Taurus - with such bravery, prepared to face anything head on. Every night, since you had breathed the air of freedom because of Yancy, you gazed at the stars. You made sure to admire Orion each night, along with thanking the silence of the night. Every night you had taken a breath of fresh air, Yancy was tugged at your mind. “Would he enjoy stargazing?’ You harshly blinked, laying your blanket against the grass for the night. You slowly sat upon the blanket, tugging gently at your sweater as you stared up at night. Along with your admiration for your time with the stars, you admired how you had time alone with your thoughts. Tomorrow was the conjugal visit day. Of course, you were visiting to inform Yancy of your view of the night sky. You knew Yancy wouldn’t abandon his life of prison, he was too infatuated with his freedom behind bars. It was possible you could suggest he abandoned his prison cell for one night to embrace the night sky with you. “ Hey Youse!” Yancy grinned widely, holding his arms out to embrace you. You threw your arms around the raven-haired man, holding the hug for more than a couple of moments. You both remained in that position, before Yancy brought a hand to ruffle your hair. You pulled away, glancing up at his dark eyes. “ Hi,” You exhaled, taking another moment to remove your arms from around his neck. Yancy did the same, rubbing the side of his face, bashful. “ How have you been?” He asked, tilting his head towards you. “ Great! I’ve… uh… been stargazing every night!” You shyly replied, fumbling with your hands. “ I think you would like it,” With your words, it became obvious to Yancy. His features lit up, a small smile spreading on his lips. “ Is youse suggesting… I come with youse?” Yancy hummed, leaning back and forth on the balls of his feet. Your face flushed, features very obviously tensing up at his small question. With a flushed face, you nodded, looking down at the ground. “ Doll-face, look at me,” Yancy hummed, waiting until your eyes were locked with his. “ Tonight?” He asked, watching you nod once more. “ ‘S Sounds good to me,” He beamed, awaiting your next response. Yet, your mouth was completely dry, struggling to find the right words for Yancy. “ Sorry, do youse not like that nickname?” He blinked after he received your silent response. You shook your head furiously, your face turning beet red once more. “ No-No! It’s fine!” You stuttered out, glancing away from Yancy again. “ Does 10 sound reasonable?” It was a reasonable time to which Yancy complied to. Just as your conversation was about to carry forth, a guard intertwined into your conversation, announcing that your time was up. Ten O’clock. A reasonable time for a near reasonable couple. Emphasis on the word near. You had set yourself fifteen minutes before, your eyes already gazing upon the beautiful, unique form of the sky. To be honest, you had truly lost track of time when Yancy had placed himself next to you with a greeting. “ Hello,” Yancy hummed next to you and you quickly checked your phone. Yancy wasn’t a minute late. “ How was the rest of you’se day doll?” The nickname rolled so cautiously off of his tongue - it sounded natural. “ It’s good! Now that you’re here,” You shyly smiled, turning to finally glance at Yancy. His hair looked clean, as if he had showered before he arrived for your hang-out. “ Did you clean yourself up for me?” You asked, the words falling out of your mouth. “ Oh my god! I’m sorry, that sounded so rude!” A chuckle left his lips as he fumbled a shaky hand through his hair. Was he nervous? “ No, You’se fine! And yes, I did… Ah-Um, Wanted to look nice for you’se.” Now his hands were awkwardly fumbling. You turned to stare at Yancy as his head shot up to gaze at the stars. You followed his gaze, then your eyes trailed back to Yancy. Impulsively acting, you leaned into Yancy’s personal space, providing a small kiss on his cheek. Yancy’s head immediately snapped towards you, face red and eyes wide. Your face were inches apart. You were the first one to close the gap, allowing the universe to witness your first kiss. To say the least, you were sure to be doing this more.

Did you like this story? My requests are open! Drop one in my inbox!

[lamiasluck]

All I Want for Christmas Is... (Pt. 2)

Summary: It's wintertime and coming close to the holidays. Yancy and everyone else in the prison have lots of plans for celebrations! Though Yancy finds himself all alone every time visitation day rolls on by. Illinois on the other hand... is just as lonely. Harsh winters meant there were little adventures to be had. More often then not he had to stay at home with nothing to do.

Maybe it's finally time for the two to reconnect again.

Characters: Illinois and Yancy

Words: 2286

Chapter 1

Read on AO3!

-

Illinois woke up to the sound of his phone buzzing. In bright text was the name “Jailbird” and a selfie he managed to sneak while adventuring with him. He eagerly answered the phone, every bit of sleep leaving him.

“Hello? Yancy?” His voice was still gravely from waking up. Though with how poor the speaker was on Yancy’s flip phone, he couldn’t tell.

“Oh, hey~ freebird…” Yancy sounded awkward. The first thing Illinois thought was that he was being held at gunpoint.

“Are you alright?”

“What? Yeah, never better.” He scratched the back of his head, still lying in bed. “Look, I gotta make this quick. Sorry for calling youse so early.”

“It’s fine,” Illinois rubbed his eyes with a sigh, “So can I visit you?”

“No.”

“I told you, jailbird.”

“Shut it!” Yancy snapped. “Theys didn’t believe me…”

While disappointed, Illinois huffed out a chuckle. “Didn’t you say I kidnapped you? The only way they’ll let me back there is in handcuffs.”

“Right… I did say youse kidnapped me, didn’t I?” That lie saved him time in solitary when he got back. Great to know he can never come out scott free.

“Like I said, if you want to see me again you’ll have to come to me. It’s never too late to get out of there,” he tried to convince the other.

“I didn’t say youse can’t come. Youse just gotta not get caught.”

Illinois actually pulled the phone away from his ear for a second, taking in what was said. When he finally did return to the phone, he only had one thing to say. “Yancy, I don’t want to get arrested again.”

“Youse won’t! I promise ya, it’ll be fine.”

A long drawn out sigh came from the adventurer. Well, was he really an adventurer if he stayed at home all day? He thought about what he was about to do. Travel to his former prison in the middle of winter, just so he could visit a man he was… friends with? Yeah, that still sounded weird considering Yancy decked him the first time they met. So he was potentially going to get arrested again to spend Christmas with a criminal?

Fuck it, sure.

“Tell me what I have to do, jailbird. You better make this worth it.”

Yancy smiled victoriously. “Now we’re talkin’, freebird.”

-

Another cold breeze made Illinois shiver in place. He could see his breath appear in white clouds within the frigid night. Even with the layers he wore, it was barely tolerable. The area he was in was secluded, a small section unseen by the prison’s security cameras. A tall gate topped with barbed wire still stopped him from entering the prison, but that wasn’t his objective. The sound of snow crunching beneath feet got his attention. Yancy shuffled towards the gate, shivering like a leaf.

“H-Hey, I-Illinois!” he chattered through clenched teeth. Despite the freezing weather, he attire didn’t change. He still wore his prison uniform, which barely offered any warmth in the winter.

The sight made Illinois nearly scream in his scolding. “Christ, Yancy you’re going to freeze to death!”

“T-They’s d-don’t g-give u-us c-coats…”

“Oh my god, you idiot!” He aggressively took off his coat and shoved it between the gate’s bars. “Take this.”

Yancy didn’t hesitate to put on the coat, furiously rubbing his arms for warmth. “Won’t youse get…” He looked at what Illinois was wearing, “Cold.”

Underneath the coat, Illinois was wearing his usual button up… and the leather jacket. Yancy couldn’t help but stare at his ensemble. His face wasn’t as cold anymore suddenly.

“I wore layers, don’t worry.” Illinois noticed Yancy’s fixated stare. “You like what you see?” He winked.

Yancy blinked and shook his head. “N-No, youse shut your trap!” he huffed, though he gave Illinois one more up and down look. “Youse don’t look bad in it, I guess…”

“Told you I look good in everything.”

“Shut up.” He rolled his eyes hard as he began to warm up.

More puffs of clouds appeared as Illinois laughed. Admittedly, he was colder, but it beats being out there in a t-shirt. “Well, you got me here. So what now?”

“Uh… Is it bad I didn’t think I’d get this far?”

Some guy risked his freedom to visit him for the holidays, and Yancy was risking days in solitary for that same reason. All this work, and there still was an iron gate in between them. God, why couldn’t he have met Illinois by conventional means? What was he doing?

“I didn’t think I’d be here too.”

By the looks of it, Illinois had the same thought process. It’s been months since they’re seen each other in person, and their last encounter was an adventure. Could they live up to that moment? Did they need to?

“Let’s start here: Merry Christmas, Yancy.”

“Merry Christmas to youse too.”

“So… how are you?”

They were frigid, and not because of the cold this time. Oddly hesitant considering all the trouble they went through. Casual conversation could be good for the average Joe, but not for them. Maybe it was the idea of the guards finding them that was putting them on edge.

“Won’t the guards find you?” Illinois asked. He looked around at the field behind Yancy. The prison was quiet, so there was nothing but snow accompanying them.

“Nah, the pushover’s patrollin’ today. I could get away wit’ murder and be fine.” Hopefully, at least.

“I hope that’s not what’s gonna happen tonight.”

“Well youse never…” He reached between the bars and grabbed Illinois. “Know!”

“H-Hey!” Illinois braced himself as he held onto the bars. Yancy grabbed his wrist, holding him in a firm grip with a mischievous smile. “Hands off the merchandise,” he laughed. A similar smile dawned on his face too. “Though, if you want to touch all you have to do is ask~”

Yancy scrunched up his nose, letting go. “Don’t make me actually kill youse.” Luckily he could blame his blush on the cold. Already they felt their unease melting away. All it took was a poor attempt at flirting.

“You started it,” Illinois snickered. After they chuckled, it was silent, but not for long. He remembered something and reached in his bag. “Oh, I brought you a gift.”

“A gift? Youse didn’t have to do that, freebird. I didn’t get anythin’ for youse…” he said, voice airy with disbelief. He scratched the back of his head.

“That’s alright. You making this happen is more than enough.” Illinois revealed a beautiful conch shell from his bag, handing it to Yancy with delicate hands.

“Illinois…” The shell was free from flaws, shined perfectly and had an exquisite pattern of beiges and browns, speckled in a way. Yancy stared at it in awe. “This is beautiful!”

“That’s not all, jailbird. Just like me, it’s more than a pretty face.” He let Yancy shove his shoulder, he deserved it for that one. Still, Yancy let him guide his hands until the shell was next to his ear. “Here, listen closely.”

Shells like this often let people listen to the ocean. This one, however, was a completely different story. Not only did Yancy hear the crash of the waves against the shoreside --oddly clear and loud-- but also the entire beach. Seagulls chirped and dived into the water for food, dolphins and fish splashed jumped from the water, the leaves from palms trees swayed in the wind. He could picture it all. It left him with the faint smell of sea salt and the want for a tropical drink. The second he pulled away, he was back in the snowy prison yard, with Illinois staring at him with a knowing smile.

“Pretty cool, right?”

“Yeah, no kiddin’.” Yancy looked at the shell once more, rubbing his thumb along its smooth curves. “Where’d youse get this?”

“Well, it was in an ancient underwater temple. I went there a little after you left. There were tons of these things decorating the place, so I figured I could take one as a souvenir.” Illinois loved to talk about his adventures. Yancy noticed whenever he started to have a far away look, as if he were reliving the moment. Or when he talked with a small smile on his lips as he described his gruelling tasks. “It was a tough journey that one. Razor sharp shells shot from the walls and gave me a nasty scar here.” He drew a line from his shoulder to his stomach. While Yancy grimaced at the thought, Illinois continued to smile. “You wanna see it?”

Yancy sputtered as Illinois began to unbutton his shirt. “Wh-What the fuck?! No, stop that!” He slapped his hands away and tried to unbutton his shirt. “Don’t ruin the moment.”

“Alright, alright, your loss,” he chuckled and shrugged. “I gave the crystal shell to a museum, but I hope you like this. It’s not a conventional gift, though.”

“You’re not a conventional man,” he rebutted. “This is fine, more than fine actually. I really like this.”

“I know you ‘don’t wanna be free’ and whatnot, but clearly you have some drive for adventure. So when you want a taste of the outside, but don’t want to leave, you can listen to this.” Illinois leaned in as close as the bars would allow him, whispering his next words. “From one adventurer to another: it sucks to stay in one place all the time. I know I hate it.”

“Well, I don't mind being all being all caged up. It’s what I’m used to. Not like I have anywhere to go to besides this.” That’s what he always said to people, but for some resaon the words felt heavy on his tongue. Why did he choke out the words now?

Illinois furrowed his brows. “You’ll always have a place with me.”

“Don’t make me consider parole, you asshole.” He gripped the bars in front of him until it hurt, avoiding Illinois’ gaze. There was no bite to his words, more so fearful contemplation.

“I think you deserve better, Yancy. Doesn’t have to be with me, but you should have a different life.” Illinois rested his hand on Yancy’s shoulder, rubbing gently in reassurance.

He tensed under the touch. “Illinois, I’m not a good person. Youse should know that.”

“And you think I have no blood on my hands?”

It was silent between the two of them. Illinois let go of his shoulder in favour for holding the hand gripping the bars. Both their hands were cold, but Yancy still found it comforting. He let Illinois continue his actions while he held the shell in his other hand with an iron grip. A touch of freedom in his hands, the potential for freedom holding his other. This measly gate prevented him from fully being on the same level as Illinois, but he was so close. Did he even want that?

Illinois gave a long sigh. “I don’t know who you were in the past, but from what I’ve seen, you’re shaping up to be a real good man.”

Yancy looked back at Illinois expecting to see his playful smile, but he was dead serious. His eyes were full of hope and care. Eventually Yancy noticed there were tears building up in his eyes. It wasn’t the sting of the cold breeze making him tear up. His lip quivered and he found his voice was straining. “S-Shut up…” He couldn’t help the quiet sob that escaped his lips. Looking down again, he struggled to wipe away his tears on the coat’s sleeves. Again, he was expecting a certain reaction out of Illinois. A negative one. So when he heard Illinois’ soft reassurances rather than a snarky laugh, he felt more afraid of what’s to come. “I fuckin’ hate you… stop it.”

“Stop what?”

“I… I don’t know,” he huffed. “I dunno what’s going on.”

“Just because something’s different, doesn’t mean it’s bad.” Illinois squeezed Yancy’s hand as he gasped at his claim. “I won’t say anything else, but I do care about you.” Those words felt weird on his tongue. He doesn’t remember the last time he cared about someone like Yancy. “I’m sorry for ruining your holiday.”

Yancy huffed out a laugh, shaking his head. His world was starting to crack, but he didn’t want to address it. Not yet, at least. “No, youse didn’t ruin anythin’. I really appreciate youse talkin’ to me like this, whatever this is. You’re different.” He wiped away the rest of his tears, doing his best to smile. “I don’t know whether I should punch ya or hug ya.”

“Not like you can do either with this gate in the way.”

“A damn shame.”

They talked for a little longer, about their lives and adventures outside and in prison. It was getting close to morning time by the end of it. The sun peeked out from the horizon and put Yancy on edge.

“I should go now,” he shifted from side to side. “I can hide your gift or pull a couple strings probably. Don’t youse worry.”

“Alright just keep it safe, you hear? Though, I won’t mind going back there and getting you another one.”

Yancy nodded. Another thing was on his mind so he blurted it out before he could regret it. “Can I call youse again? Casually?”

“Of course you can! I’ll be more than happy, I didn't know you wanted to. Just don’t get caught doing it.”

“I’ll be fine, I wanna talk to youse again.”

It took a lot for Illinois not to make a snarky comment and ruin the moment again, but he kept quiet, he bit his tongue. It felt odd having to part ways again. They both lingered around much longer than they should. Especially in Yancy’s case.

“I hope we can adventure again, jailbird. You gotta stretch your wings sometime.”

“Maybe we can soon.” Yancy shrugged off Illinois’ coat and gave it back. He patted Illinois’ shoulder and backed away from the gate. “I’ll see youse around.”

“Likewise, stay safe.”

Then that was that. Illinois went back to his car and Yancy went back to the prison. Illinois felt oddly alone again, even though he always was. Something happened back there, but he wasn't sure how to describe it. So he shrugged his shoulders and kept driving. This was an adventure, that's for sure, though he has never had the treasure be someone else's company.

[rat-that-writes]

The Egos Reactions to Y/N Calling Them ‘Big Boy’

a/n: okay this came to be because me and @softladyhours were discussing how much of a whore dark is. enjoy!

tw: everyone is so horny, i swear a lot

Dark

➭ alright, this fuckin slut

- there’s not much that needs to be said because as soon as you call him this he just

- tackles you to the nearest surface and kinda just like fucks your brains out

➭ lets break this down then

- you call him big??? yeah he’s gotta show HOW big

- you call him a BOY??? HES GOTTA SHOW YOU HOW MUCH OF A MANNNN HE IS

- which includes the fucking you until you cant think

➭ also you bet he’s gonna call you small/tiny after this regardless of your size or tallness hhgrgrghrh

illinois

➭ holy fUCK

- listen he loves nicknames and pet names that aren’t just “babe” or something generic

- like if you call him cowboy

- he will NUT

➭ now if you call him big boy!!???:??!!).’mf

- NUTTTTT

- he just fuckingjfkdij

➭ lets say the context is you’re needing his help reaching something off a shelf because hes a tall bitch

- and you say “thanks, big boy :)”

- and he will just. stare at you because woAH, hes hard now

➭ conclusion: anything makes him hard

yancy

➭ AHHHHHHHHH

- oh my god hes so starved of affection he gets horny SO easily but he is SO SHY ABOUT IT SOMETIMES

- this is one of those times.

➭ immediately after you call him this he just

- just 😵‍💫 because HOHEOWOJSJBD HELLO

- HE DOESNT KNOW WHAT TO DO BECAUSE HE FEELS KINDA WEIRD ABOUT GETTING HORNY AFTER BEING CALLED ‘BIG BOY’ BUT GODDDDD HE IS HHHRRARARAJRB

➭ and ur like “yancy are u good”

- and he just 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

- u gotta snap him out of it - preferably with a kiss

damien

➭ OH GOD

- POOR BOY DOESNT KNOW WHAT TO DO

➭ hes half way between horny and amused

- amused bc haha that’s cute

- horny because ????he doesn’t even know

➭ mans just kinda ☺️😅 and gets back to work

➭ mission failed 😔

- guess you’ll just have to walk into his office naked-

[juju-on-that-yeet]

Hi, yes hello I have a hc that Illinois wears contacts on all of his adventures, but wears his glasses most everywhere else :)) I was just thinking,,,, Yancy seeing Illinois in glasses for the first time and my heart just went (wiejgafneijf) because he'd 100% work them :')

OOF YES GOOD HC 👌👌👌

It makes sense that he wouldn’t wear glasses on adventures, they’d get lost or broken way too easily. But as someone who’s worn both, glasses can definitely be less of a hassle XD

GOD he’s just chillin, maybe watching TV or smth with his glasses on and Yancy walks in like “huh. didn’t know youse had those” and trying to be cool but on the inside he’s just “OH NO HE’S HOT” and Lio can tell XDDD He’ll be talking to Yancy and pretending he doesn’t notice how flustered Yancy gets whenever he adjusts his glasses, pulling them low down the bridge of his nose or pushing them back up, maybe at one point taking them off and cleaning them reeeeeeeally slowly 😏 Poor Yancy is beside himself, why is Lio so fuckin hOT and Lio is just :3c

[kookie-doughs]

Y/N L/N AND THE HALFBLOODS

Percy Jackson X Reader

-Y/N L/N met Percy Jackson and everything was now ruined.

CHAPTER 12: Hello Poodle

We were pretty miserable that night.

We camped out in the woods, a hundred yards from the main road, in a marshy clearing that local kids had obviously been using for parties. The ground was littered with flattened soda cans and fast-food wrappers.

We'd taken some food and blankets from Aunty Em's, but we didn't dare light a fire to dry our damp clothes. The Furies and Medusa had provided enough excitement for one day. We didn't want to attract anything else.

We decided to sleep in shifts. I volunteered to take first watch.

Annabeth curled up on the blankets and was snoring as soon as her head hit the ground. Percy took the spot beside me and was laying on my lap. Grover fluttered with his flying shoes to the lowest bough of a tree, put his back to the trunk, and stared at the night sky.

"Go ahead and sleep," I told them. "I'll wake you guys if there's trouble."

He nodded, but still didn't close his eyes. "It makes me sad."

"What does? The fact that you signed up for this stupid quest?" Percy hissed.

"No. This makes me sad." He pointed at all the garbage on the ground. "And the sky. You can't even see the stars. They've polluted the sky. This is a terrible time to be a satyr."

"Oh, yeah. I guess you'd be an environmentalist."

He glared at him. "Only a human wouldn't be. Your species is clogging up the world so fast ... ah, never mind. It's useless to lecture a human. At the rate things are going, I'll never find Pan."

"Pam? Like the cooking spray?"

"Pan!" he cried indignantly. "P-A-N. The great god Pan! What do you think I want a searcher's license for?"

A strange breeze rustled through the clearing, temporarily overpowering the stink of trash and muck. It brought the smell of berries and wildflowers and clean rainwater, things that might've once been in these woods. Suddenly I was nostalgic for something I'd never known.

"Tell me about the search," I said.

Grover looked at me cautiously, as if he were afraid I was just making fun.

"The God of Wild Places disappeared two thousand years ago," he told me. "A sailor off the coast of Ephesos heard a mysterious voice crying out from the shore, 'Tell them that the great god Pan has died!' When humans heard the news, they believed it. They've been pillaging Pan's kingdom ever since. But for the satyrs, Pan was our lord and master. He protected us and the wild places of the earth. We refuse to believe that he died. In every generation, the bravest satyrs pledge their lives to finding Pan. They search the earth, exploring all the wildest places, hoping to find where he is hidden, and wake him from his sleep."

"And you want to be a searcher."

"It's my life's dream," he said. "My father was a searcher. And my Uncle Ferdinand ... the statue you saw back there—"

"Oh, right, sorry."

Grover shook his head. "Uncle Ferdinand knew the risks. So did my dad. But I'll succeed. I'll be the first searcher to return alive."

"Hang on—the first?"

Grover took his reed pipes out of his pocket. "No searcher has ever come back. Once they set out, they disappear. They're never seen alive again."

"Not once in two thousand years?"

"No."

"And your dad? You have no idea what happened to him?"

"None."

"But you still want to go," Percy said, amazed. "I mean, you really think you'll be the one to find Pan?"

"I have to believe that, Percy. Every searcher does. It's the only thing that keeps us from despair when we look at what humans have done to the world. I have to believe Pan can still be awakened."

I stared at the orange haze of the sky and tried to understand how Grover could pursue a dream that seemed so hopeless. Then again, was I any better?

"How are we going to get into the Underworld?" I asked him. "I mean, what chance do we have against a god?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "But back at Medusa's, when you were searching her office? Annabeth was telling me—"

"Oh, I forgot. Annabeth will have a plan all figured out."

"Don't be so hard on her, Percy. She's had a tough life, but she's a good person. After all, she forgave me...." His voice faltered.

"What do you mean?" I asked. "Forgave you for what?"

Suddenly, Grover seemed very interested in playing notes on his pipes.

"Wait a minute," I said. "Your first keeper job was five years ago. Annabeth has been at camp five years. She wasn't... I mean, your first assignment that went wrong—"

"I can't talk about it," Grover said, and his quivering lower lip suggested he'd start crying if I pressed him. "But as I was saying, back at Medusa's, Annabeth and I agreed there's something strange going on with this quest. Something isn't what it seems."

"Well, duh. I'm getting blamed for stealing a thunderbolt that Hades took."

"That's not what I mean," Grover said. "The Fur—The Kindly Ones were sort of holding back. Like Mrs. Dodds at Yancy Academy... why did she wait so long to try to kill you? Then on the bus, they just weren't as aggressive as they could've been."

"They seemed plenty aggressive to me."

I shook my head. "They were screeching at us: 'Where is it? Where?'"

"Asking about me," he said.

"Maybe if you haven't steered, we could've found out."

"Maybe ... but Annabeth and I, we both got the feeling they weren't asking about a person. They said 'Where is it?' They seemed to be asking about an object."

"That doesn't make sense."

"I know. But if we've misunderstood something about this quest, and we only have nine days to find the master bolt...." He looked at us like he was hoping for answers, but neither of us had have any.

"Maybe... Had--- the big guy isn't actually that bad."

"I haven't been straight with you," Percy told Grover. "I don't care about the master bolt. I agreed to go to the Underworld so I could bring back Y/N's parents and my mother."

Grover blew a soft note on his pipes. "I know that, Percy. But are you sure that's the only reason?"

"I'm not doing it to help my father. He doesn't care about me. I don't care about him."

Grover gazed down from his tree branch. "Look, Percy, I'm not as smart as Annabeth and Y/N. I'm not as brave as you and Y/N. But I'm pretty good at reading emotions. You're glad your dad is alive. You feel good that he's claimed you, and part of you wants to make him proud. That's why you mailed Medusa's head to Olympus. You wanted him to notice what you'd done."

"Yeah? Well maybe satyr emotions work differently than human emotions. Because you're wrong. I don't care what he thinks."

Grover pulled his feet up onto the branch. "Okay, Percy. Whatever."

"Besides, I haven't done anything worth bragging about. We barely got out of New York and we're stuck here with no money and no way west."

Grover looked at the night sky, like he was thinking about that problem. He turned to me, "How about I take first watch, huh? You two get some sleep."

I nodded and turned to Percy who wanted to protest, but he started to play Mozart, soft and sweet, and he turned away. After a few bars of Piano Concerto no. 12, I was asleep. He was sleeping.

"You're still awake?"

"Barely. I call the next shift okay?"

Grover nodded so I slept.

Believe in them.

Where is this coming from?

Water is our enemy, air is our demise, the darkness shall be our ally and the land should be haven. You should befriend Hades. We need someone on our side. We've already angered Poseidon and Zeus.

Why'd have to be him? He seem like the reason we're in this quest.

Trust your allies.

I was woken up. It was still dark and I could see Grover was droopy. Percy held my hand tight as he was trembling in his sleep.

When Grover saw me awake he just passed out on where he was sitting.

"Percy," I called him trying to keep quiet not to wake up the others. "Wake up." I slowly shook him.

His eyes shot open and looked at me in fear.

"Y/N..."

"Are you okay?"

"Nightmare..." He whimpered snuggling closer.

"Want to tell me about it?"

"Well... I was in a pit and someone was talking to me I think. I saw your parents' last moments... And my mom's then... I saw you drowning... desperately trying to save yourself. The voice told me to help them rise. I couldn't do anything..."

It is not us. I dare not hurt our hero.

"It's okay. Percy, don't worry. You should continue sleeping. Come on, I'm on watch."

He looked at me in hesitation and slept while I ran my hand on his hair.

~

"Well, good morning to you Peabody." I greeted Annabeth.

"Weren't you the first watch?"

"Grover went first watch. I went to sleep with Percy."

She turned to look at Percy who was asleep holding my hand. "Isn't it weird that he's so attached?" She grimaced.

"Well, to be fair. I feel like I have to stay with him no matter what. Like my subconscious telling me, don't leave him and stay. I'm not sure about his case though."

"Where's Grover?"

"I don't know he said he's going to look around. I'll look for him. Stay with Percy without killing him will you?"

"Eh, I'll try." She smiled.

"Good enough for me." As gentle as I could I remove his hand from mine and stood up to look for Grover.

It didn't take me long to find Grover who was sitting in the middle of no where in front of a pink poodle.

"Uh, whatcha got there?"

"He's our ride west." He looked at me. "His name is Gladiola."

"Uhm... hello." The dog looked at me then barked. "Well, let's bring him to Annabeth then."

Annabeth was as confused as I was when I found Grover. She greeted it hello reluctantly.

I shrugged at her as a response.

Grover sat cross-legged on a blanket with the dog on his lap.

I walked up to Annabeth and laughed, "I have no idea."

Percy stirred awake and sat up.

"Good morning." I smiled.

"The zombie lives." Annabeth tossed him a bag of nacho-flavored corn chips from Aunty Em's snack bar.

Percy eyed Grover confusedly and back at me and Annabeth.

The poodle yapped at Percy suspiciously. Grover said, "No, he's not."

Percy blinked. "Are you... talking to that thing?"

The poodle growled.

"This thing," Grover warned, "is our ticket west. Be nice to him."

"You can talk to animals?"

Grover ignored the question. "Percy, meet Gladiola. Gladiola, Percy."

He stared at Annabeth and I, as if we were kidding.

"I'm not saying hello to a pink poodle," He said. "Forget it."

"Percy," I said. "I said hello to the poodle. Annabeth said hello to the poodle. You say hello to the poodle."

The poodle growled.

He said hello to the poodle.

Grover explained that he'd come across Gladiola in the woods and they'd struck up a conversation. The poodle had run away from a rich local family, who'd posted a $200 reward for his return. Gladiola didn't really want to go back to his family, but he was willing to if it meant helping Grover.

"How does Gladiola know about the reward?" I asked.

"He read the signs," Grover said. "Duh."

"Of course," I said. "Silly me."

"So we turn in Gladiola," Annabeth explained in her best strategy voice, "we get money, and we buy tickets to Los Angeles. Simple."

"Not another bus," Percy said warily.

"No," Annabeth agreed.

She pointed downhill, toward train tracks I saw last night. "There's an Amtrak station half a mile that way. According to Gladiola, the westbound train leaves at noon."

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