#XPWEW dead

[dylanissicc]

June 20th, 2021: XPWEW star Slayer has been pronounced dead today after what is being declared as a suicide. Slayer’s final appearance on XPWEW was at the Lockdown 8 pay-per-view when he celebrated his daughter Lotus’ title win over The Deity in Madison Square Garden. Reports from his LD8 appearance were reported that he looked sickly and in very poor health. It’s apparent that Slayer has been battling a drug addiction since 2006 and many of those demons played out on screen. Fans of XPWEW have been wondering why Slayer has not been in the ring with his last match being against Jake Awesome at the Lockdown 7 pay-per-view. He will go down as one of the best ever

5x XPWEW World Heavyweight Champion

3x XPWEW International Champion

2x XPWEW Tag Team Champion (Al Snow & Romeo Roselli)

multiple time WEW Champion and easily the biggest homegrown start from WEW (World Extreme Wrestling) founded by Omega1518 (Johnny Omega’s promotion in Japan)

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (7-10-2020)

XPWEW Friday Night PYRO

Episode: 434

Channel: VICE TV at 10PM EST

Location: The Barracks | Los Angeles, California

- Cold open shows a limousine pulling up and a door opens and pops out Ruckus with a big blunt followed by Jake Awesome and the rest of THE SET

(Friday Night Pyro Intro)

- Opening Segment: THE SET enters the ring from the parking lot area through the backstage (Ruckus, Jake Awesome, Myron Reed, Kotto Brazil, Jordan Oliver, Chrissy Rivera & Siaka Lexoni) with a very long boosting entrance that's very reminiscent of a WCW Nitro New World Order heelish entrance. Jake Awesome noticeably has a gold box with a ribbon on it that he teases at the camera. THE SET enters the ring at this point and Siaka Lexoni kicks off the nightly speech saying; "On the gang! On the family! On God! This is The Set!". World Champion Ruckus then takes the microphone and adoringly looks at International Champion Jake Awesome with a big grin and says; ":Last week this man (Jake) proved once again why he has my respect because he put the runt of the XPWEW locker room, The All Man and power-bombed that man off the damn planet. Can we re-roll that footage" (The SET watches replay after replay laughing at Jake Awesome throwing All Man off the stage last week on loop)

Jake Awesome grabs the mic from Ruckus; "I promised these two young men (Myron & Kotto) an opportunity. Even if I have to take it into my own hands, so what did I do? I threw the Tag Team Champion off the stage, Fair enough right?..I know that even after a fall like that The All Man will not let injury stop him, he's tougher than he looks. I know that the All Man is here tonight so I'd like to invite him to the ring but first I have a box right here, These are 6 gold chains, 6 gold chains with our very own THE SET logo on them and I wanna present them to all of you, because I got mine (Jake pulls chain out from under his shirt)

The Set all put on their respective chains and give dabs to Jake Awesome for purchasing them

- XPWEW Tag Team Champion All Man enters in a halo neck brace with wife and fellow champion All Woman (Tennille Dashwood). All Man: "I hate to spoil the party but Jake Awesome, you son of a bitch. I don't care if I spoil the party. You went from 1st ballot Hall of Famer to piece of shit Judas in the matter of a week...I can't eat. I can't sleep. I can't even use the bathroom without my wife help navigate me and it's all because of you and I got a call early this morning and I was told by General Manager Troy Clausen that because of my injury I have to forfeit the Tag Team Titles...Baby I'm sorry I let you down"

Ruckus: "Milk Man cut the bullshit, Nobody wants you here, Nobody wants neither of you here so I'm glad you have to forfeit the titles"

All Woman: "He has to go away for a while but I don't" *Chrissy Rivera steps forward

All Woman: "Because next week I want a match with Jake Awesome 1 on 1 with both hands tied behind his back, that's my only offer" (All Man looks at her as if "No no no baby no don't do this"

Jake Awesome: *chuckles* I accept

- Troy Clausen enters (takes both vacant XPWEW Tag Team Titles) I'll allow the match next week but at All or Nothing, Myron Reed and Kotto Brazil you will challenge The Death Machines Joe Gacy & Audrey Carbine and the winner will be the NEW XPWEW Tag Team Champions.

- The Set joins commentary

- Rosemary enters

1 on 1

M1: Chrissy Rivera def. Rosemary via submission and referee Mike Chioda has to pull Chrissy off to break the hold

- On commentary Kaitlyn Khaos announces I just got word from GM Troy Clausen and that next week will we determine who will challenge Ruckus for the XPWEW World Heavyweight Championship: Next Week Golden Bryce will go one on one with Leonard McGraw and the winner will challenge Ruckus to a match of their choosing on July 26th at the XPWEW All or Nothing 2020 pay-per-view streaming LIVE on FITE TV

- James Westerbeck: "I'm here right now with the 2-0 Romeo Roselli. Romeo, I know you are good friends with The All Man and tonight you'll be in a 4 on 4 elimination match against The Set so what's on your mind?"

Romeo: "Revenge. Revenge for a bully. I've been bullied my whole life but when actions were made I backed it up and I always got the upper hand, so to The Set tonight the bullies get bullied. Don't blink and nice chain by the way and you know I love shiny things."

- Garrett Thompson & Ethan Bedlam enters

- The Marauder Simon Gotch & Mandy Leon enters

- Champagne Clausen enters

Tag Team Match

M2: Garrett Thompson & Ethan Bedlam def. Simon Gotch & Champagne (w/ Mandy Leon)

After the match: Champagne hits The Chardonnay on Gotch and on commentary Nick Simmonds points out Garrett Thompson & Ethan Bedlam have 4 straight wins as a team to which Garrett overhears that walking by and snatches Nick's headset: Garrett: "Yeah what kinda shit is that like? Four straight wins and Mister Troy Clausen grants those losers Audrey Carbine and Joe Gacy a title shot, I was at Lockdown and they bloody lost to a man that's wearing a halo right now and Myron Reed and Kotto Brazil *chuckles* Who have they beat? I'm not gonna beg I'm just gonna keep winning until you can't ignore me any more."

- The Death Machine: Joe Gacy enters and runs his mouth towards Garrett Thompson and Ethan Bedlam as they pass on the ramp walk

- Jacques Dudley enters

1 on 1

M3: Joe Gacy def. Jacques Dudley

AD: ALL OR NOTHING 2020 | July 26th, 2020 will have an 8 Man Case Your Luck Ladder Match

- Lotus enters

- Doxy Deity enters

- Kiera Hogan with 911 Brian Lee enter

3 Way Dance

M4: Lotus def. Doxy Deity & Kiera Hogan (w/ Brian Lee)

[Recap video of last week's challenge from Death Machine Audrey Carbine and XPWEW Women's Champion Priscilla Kelly and her "I can make you tap out in under 10 minutes"

- The Death Machine Audrey Carbine enters

- XPWEW Women's Champion Priscilla Kelly enters

XPWEW Women's Championship on the line

10 minute Submission Match (If Audrey can make Priscilla submit in under the ten minute time limit she will become the Women's Champion)

M5: Priscilla Kelly def. Audrey Carbine

Match ends in controversial fashion where Carbine makes Priscilla tap out right as the clock expires and it makes her spaz out and kick the ropes in frustration. Kelly attacks Carbine and takes her down and she goes under the ring and grabs a bag of (what we unsure, thumb tacks historically would be in a bag like that. Priscilla: "Maybe Audrey next week I'll give you twenty minutes. Try again hahahaha"

- The Set enters

- Alveno La Flare enters (camera glances at Ruckus mocking La Flare "I thought I deaded this ***** already)

- Romeo Roselli enters

- Golden Bryce enters

- Leonard McGraw enters (gets in Bryce's face then Jake's then Ruckus')

4 on 4 Elimination Tag Team Match

M6: THE SET (Jake Awesome, Ruckus, Myron Reed & Kotto Brazil)

def.

Leonard McGraw, Golden Bryce, Romeo Roselli & Alveno La Flare

*Match of the Night*

Match ends: Leonard McGraw lasts a while alone with a well oiled machine of teamwork offense from Ruckus and Jake Awesome but ultimately Jake hoists McGraw up for the Awesome Bomb and off the rope Ruckus springs for a bankroll off the stalling Awesome Bomb for the 1-2-3 and THE SET celebrates but McGraw regains his composure to attack Ruckus and Jake but then Jordan Oliver tries to sneak behind him and strike McGraw with his Juniorweight Championship belt but McGraw ducks and goes to clothesline Oliver but Oliver scurries under the rope up the stage and joins The Set at the top of the ramp. Leonard McGraw stands in the ring with his hands on his hips and turns around to a 6 Rings spear from Golden Bryce. Bryce then gets hype and signals he wants Ruckus' title as the show ends

[Order of eliminations]

- Ruckus eliminates Alveno La Flare

- Leonard McGraw eliminates Kotto Brazil

- Golden Bryce eliminates Myron Reed

- Jake Awesome eliminates Golden Bryce

- Ruckus eliminates Romeo Roselli

- Ruckus eliminates Leonard McGraw after a double team mugging with Jake Awesome

Sole Survivors: THE SET (Ruckus & Jake Awesome)

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (6-26-2020)

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro

Episode: 432

June 26th, 2020

Location: The Barracks in Los Angeles, California | XPWEW training facility

Opening Segment: The Set (without Ruckus) (Siaka Lexoni, Myron Reed, Kotto Brazil, Jordan Oliver & Chrissy Rivera) enter Siaka: I know some of y’all have to be asking just how long does our world heavyweight champion Ruckus have to be on hiatus from appearing on this show? Kotto: And I know some of y’all have to be wondering well is he going to be at the pay-per-view The Devil’s Playhouse this Sunday Myron: That’s 19.99 on FITE TV right now use the promo code “RUCKUS” for the next five minutes to save a few bones. That’s R-U-C-K-U-S. Ruckus Jordan: That’s right! Until The Set receives a formal ‘thank you’ from the VICE network you won’t see the world champion on this show.

Un-named gentleman in a suit enters Unknown Sir: My name is Shane Sloth and on behalf of Viceland and Vice Media I wanna say thank you..... (Silence) Siaka: Mahn that shit ain’t good enough! You ain’t thanking me you thanking Ruckus! Shane Sloth: Well how can I... Myron: Get him on the phone, Get him on the phone

Leonard McGraw enters to a huge pop (Leonard comes in and hits a devastating clothesline on Shane Sloth that knocks him out of his dress shoes) ((Leonard grabs the mic)) Jordan: Hold it, Hold it, Hold it, Hold it, Hold it. You come out here and think you can do whatever you want Leonard: That’s right Siaka: BOY DO NOT LET ME SPEAK ON THAT. YOU BETTER STAY YOUR PLACE Leonard: Shut the hell up! Wah Wah Wah. Siaka Lexoni? You don’t even wrestle anymore so shut the hell up Leonard: Jordan, Myron, Kotto Brazil y’all three stooges sum bitches got a world title match in 2 days but do you really, because I know I got a big red target on my back and I wanna warm ya. Don’t think that match with Jake Awesome is gonna have me on a half tank of gas cause im coming for all three of ya and I’m coming for the xpwew world title. Which meaaaans I’m coming for Ruckus’ ass and I want a piece of Ruckus’ ass cell phone rings (Comedic moment of a mouth gape-opened McGraw staring at a fretful Jordan Oliver who slowly holds up the cell phone to the microphone) Jordan: Hello? ..... Jordan: No no no I’m in the ring right now it’s the opening segment...... Jordan: ......No no no I’m looking right at him.......Yeah. Ugly as hell. Oh Leonard, Ruckus said he has two words for you and he wanted me to hold it up to the microphone Leonard attacks Jordan but Myron and Kotto join in and even the score a bit and now it’s a 1 on 3 onslaught on McGraw who then gets help from Jacques Dudley and then assistance from Alveno La Flare who makes the request for a 6 man tonight! Myron: Y’all got it!!!!

Tag Team Match M1: Chrissy Rivera & Lotus defeat Doxy Deity & Prisiclla Kelly

James Westerbeck interviews Golden Bryce “Ever since Lockdown I’ve been doing some soul searching and all I can say is if TakaNaka really is the greatest tag team then surely they can beat me this sunday? I doubt it!”

Taka Michinoku enters with Masato Tanaka

Golden Bryce enters

1 on 1 M2: Golden Bryce defeats Taka Michinoku (with Masato Tanaka)

In ring segment: Garrett Thompson and Ethan Bedlam point out they are on a 3 win in a row winning streak; and they deserve shots at the tag belts regardless of what gender is holding them. And that’s a promise

Tag Team Match M3: Garrett Thompson & Ethan Bedlam defeats 3M Ultra & M3 Quintillo

(After the match Simon Gotch and Mandy Leon come down flaunting their new tag team gold and Gotch bites off a little more than he can chew getting up in Bedlam’s face to which Garrett steps in between them and says “Wanna try getting physical with me?” Gotch responds Garrett Thompson “Go back to your bathhouse” Garrett responds “I’m always watching and your fresh meat, Tell your little girlfriend I won’t hesitate to knock both your heads off” Gotch uncomfortable walks forward and Mandy Leon slumps her shoulders and that was actual bit of an uncomfortable segment and why Gotch and Mandy aren’t all that ‘heelish’ it puts over Garrett and Bedlam as proper scumbags

Based Fabian and Genevalisse enters

Tag Team Match M4: Simon Gotch and Mandy Leon defeat Based Fabian & Genevalisse

Romeo Roselli cuts a promo directly into the camera from what appears to be a dark alley “Joe Gacy, you think I’m rusty cause I haven’t been in the ring in two years. Well rust never sleeps big boy and I’m gonna remind you why I am the most important person in sports entertainment today. As for Audrey Carbine. You wanna take a shot you can’t reach, try it because if you think you got voices in your head well I’m gonna be singing the chorus and I’m gonna be loud. So stay in your place and understand my vengeance is all inclusive.....”

• AWESOME BOMB ACADEMY COMMERCIAL

Priscilla Kelly and Lotus join commentary with Nick Simmonds and Kaitlyn Khaos to push the women’s playhouse match but first Kaitlyn Khaos throws it over to XPWEW backstage correspondent James Westerbeck as he gets a word with XPWEW International Champion Jake Awesome going into tonight’s contract signing and Sunday’s Last Man Standing match with Leonard McGraw

James: Jake, you don’t think it’s a bit compromising you made the challenge so supreme for Leonard knowing he’s gonna compete in The Devil’s Playhouse later in the night Jake: Ask Leonard McGraw why he cashed not one check but Why he cashed two big checks his ass CAN NOT cash. He’s gonna be in hospice after Last Man Standinf. Key!!! Last Man Standing, he won’t be in two matches Sunday. But...James have you ever heard the saying “If your gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough?” Well Leonard is dumb. Very dumb. But tough? Meh the verdict is out and I’ll be the judge and the executioner ....

Death Machines: Joe Gacy enters followed by Audrey Carbine

All Woman enters with All Man

1 on 1 M5: All Woman defeats Audrey Carbine when Romeo Roselli interferes with a swift kick to Carbine’s head giving All Woman the go ahead roll up victory, Gacy comes in and bodies Roselli they brawl to the ringside area ultimately with Gacy picking up Romeo and All Man in one slam and running towards the barricade and breaking the barricade and leaving them in a heap. Gacy walks off and Carbine walks off but not before stepping to Priscilla Kelly at commentary but Kelly did not flinch Lotus “Camera needs to focus on me, neither of those girls are leaving that playhouse on their own two feet and that’s not a threat”

Some suit walks up with the contract and tells Jake “Leonard’s already signed Jake, he said he doesn’t wanna talk, he only wants to fight”

Jake angrily yells in the gentlemen’s face: Alright huh huh that’s cool, that’s different that’s unique, How cute McGraw... (Jake signs the contract on James Westerbeck’s back) “I like closed casket funerals. Quick and easy. No pain. Sunday’s gonna be fun”

Pre-Recorded Segment: Champagne Clausen driving in his Bugatti vehicle in the streets of Philadelphia. Presumably looking for Ruckus as he wants to create a bridge so he can be friends with The Set to helps his chances of winning at The Devil’s Playhouse: Champagne pulls up to this very “Elm Street” looking house and approaches a man at the door who thinks Champagne is trying to buy weed and Champagne responds “I’m looking for Ruckus” Man 1: Follow me......camera follows them inside this smoke filled house Man 2: Knocks on door, Ruckus, Champagne Clausen is here Ruckus: (opens door) Champagne: I came all this way to say look I’m on your side, I’m on the side of The Set Ruckus: exhales blunt smoke...”The Set got a plan A and that’s me retaining the title Sunday, The Set got a plan B that’s you, that’s Champagne Clausen helping get rid of McGraw and we can work out a deal on getting you opportunities. Right but if you fail to deliver and if my dudes somehow fail and then yeah I got a plan C. Plan C gonna change the whole game, and shit Plan C really already in effect people just don’t know. Plan C gonna take care of McGraw, 1 way or another. I’m leaving Devil’s Playhouse still the heavyweight champion of the world and McGraw gonna leave me alone for good, I’m finna dead this nigga’s career. He a problem and If The Set can’t dead this shit in THE SET’s PLAYHOUSE. Plan C will. Ruckus slams door in Champagne’s face

Jacques enters

Alveno La Flare enters

Leonard McGraw enters

The Set enters (without Ruckus)

6 Man Tag Match Main Event M6: THE SET (Myron Reed, Kotto Brazil and Jordan Oliver) with Siaka Lexoni defeats Alveno La Flare, Leonard McGraw and Jacques Dudley

Myron Reed hits his finishing move “Sky Walker” on Alveno La Flare for the 1-2-3 as The Set wins the match

After the match Leonard McGraw clotheslines Kotto, then Jordan then Myron sells it like a champion flipping after the clothesline and a fired up McGraw does the “belt wrapping around the waist” motion twice as to signal he’s gonna have 2 belts come Sunday. Show ends

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (5-15-2020)

Episode: 426 Date: May 15th, 2020 Network: VICE Location: Los Angeles, California Building: The Barracks

Opening Segment: XPWEW World Heavyweight Champion Golden Bryce! Before he can speak into the microphone

Enters his mentor Masato Tanaka Masato: Young Man. Youth. Oh to be young. Golden Bryce. Or should I call you G-Baby? chuckles. 8 days. You have eight whole days to prepare for Ruckus on the biggest stage anyone in that locker room has competed in. I’ve had great Lockdown moments. I’ve had some I’d like to forget as well, And I know you do cause one year ago you sent me a text and 1 in the morning merely hours before your Lockdown 6 match with Jake Awesome and you asked me: What am I gonna do tomorrow? Well Bryce I don’t know and by the looks of it you didn’t either. You lost. You walked in a champion and walked out with nothing. And fast forward one year. You walk in AGAIN as world champion. Do I??? Do I think you’re gonna walk out with that same world title? I. Don’t. Know..... I don’t know if I see passion? I don’t know if I see will? Tears? Blood? Sweat? Do you know that Ruckus is 3-0 at Lockdown? Did you know that? He even beat me? So believe me! I know he’s a different breed. But Bryce you’re special too, it takes a special person to get back to that spot only one man before has done that and it was Jake Awesome. Maybe last year you just got a bad draw, you drew a bad hand. Maybe just maybe last year you fought the greatest champion in the history of this sport. But Bryce let me tell ya brother Ruckus should not be overlooked. His punches feel like kicks. His kicks feel like despair. And he isn’t looking for good sportsmanship. He’s looking to bludgeon you next Saturday... You can’t reason with Ruckus And so help me if you try to shake that god damn hand of his, like he’s got any respect for you or anybody. He doesn’t! So don’t bring that bullshit, don’t reach out your hand. Look at me! Look at me when I’m talking to you. You have to be ruthless. Ruckus is not gonna wait, he’s gonna be looking for a fair fight for God Sake’s look at the impressionable youth he surround himself with? The Set? Oh to be young again! Ruckus is starving. He’s starving emotionally. His life is a train wreck and He needs the validation of that world title. The man can’t even stay clean and out of prison long enough to have a world title feud. It’s why he’s never had one. So Bryson don’t look for a fair 50% 50% game of chess. You are playing chemical warfare in 8 days. So I don’t want no smiles and handshakes and hugs. NO MORE! Your social media? You’re making Tik Tok dance videos with your pregnant wife? You’re hiring dance crews and school marching bands to do your entrance FUCK THAT BULLSHIT. Do you know how much egg is gonna be on your face when you get all the fireworks, all the bells and whistles and you LOSE. You think Ruckus wanted this? You think he has an ounce of passion for this business. 3 months ago he was eating his meals through the slit of a metal door. He’s an animal. So you have to bring out a different version of Golden Bryce on the 23rd of May. Because if you don’t....if you.......... coughs If you bring THIS Golden Bryce to Lockdown 7. You’re gonna get your ass handed to you..... Do shape up! or ship out! And never come back because if you don’t take this advice your gonna look like the biggest bust in XPWEW history. Am I understood? Golden Bryce (looks at Tanaka in Eyes with a cold dead blank stare, then off into the stands. Bryce looks down at the title around his waist and then walks out of the ring) ((Bryce saunters up the ramp)) (((The Set runs past him: Myron, Kotto, Jordan, Chrissy, Lexoni and this Ruckus who slowly walks past Bryce making eye contact)))

The Set start to beat down Masato Tanaka but Bryce still standing at the halfway spot on the ramp just watches the beatdown of his mentor??????

Ruckus holding a steel chair as Myron and Kotto hold Tanaka up awaiting a head shot

Ruckus: Last call nigga. You gonna save him?

Bryce: just turns around and walks up the ramp

(((Ruckus hits Masato over the head with a devastating chair shot)))

Bryce doesn’t even look back

Commentary puts over the seriousness of The Set’s vicious attack on XPWEW Legend Masato Tanaka

Tag Team Match

XPWEW Women’s Champ Prisiclla Kelly enters

Doxy enters

Mandy Leon enters with The Marauder Simon Gotch

Kiera Hogan enters with 911 Brian Lee

Tag Team Match M1: Doxy Deity & Prisiclla Kelly vs Kiera Hogan & Mandy Leon w/ Simon Gotch ENDS IN NO CONTEST While Doxy and Prisiclla were scheduled to be partners tonight it didn’t stop Doxy from turning on her biggest rival to attack her from behind to the point referee Kevin Madrox had to call the match off while him and Simon Gotch separate the two from attacking each other. Even Romeo Roselli comes down to help break up the doddybrook

PROMO: Slayer vs Jake [history] Commentary breaks down what happened last week with Jake and Slayer and Rosemary [[[Jake appears with a bandage wrapped around his stomach]]]

Jake Awesome needs to rest his injured stomach but her is anyway in his first match on Friday Night Pyro since October 2019

1 on 1 M2: Jake Awesome defeats Alveno La Flare

Lotus walks down to blindside Jake but Jake is way ahead of her antics and he runs up and grabs her in a spine buster position and Rams her through the corner guardrail but then hoists her up and Oklahoma Slams her through the commentary desk. Not enough, Jake sets up a table outside. Throws Lotus in the ring and Awesome Bomb’s her over the ropes and flings her to the table he set up down below for a wicked wreck. Jake flexes hard and belts out a screech of intensifying roar. Rosemary and Slayer stand at the ramp and attempt to jump in the ring. Jake baits them into to do so. But Jake runs them down and chases them both and the camera follows Jake chasing Slayer and Rosemary to the back to the point Slayer and Rosemary jump in a vehicle and Jake is right on their heels. Jake gets on top of the hood and busts through the windshield and grabs Slayer’s hair and tries to pull him out of the car through the little hole he busted open within the windshield of the car.

Rosemary gets out of the car and beats Jake with an umbrella all the while he’s trying to pull Slayer out of the car while simultaneously getting thwacked with this umbrella. Rosemary then sprays the mist in his face and that stops Jake from his onslaught. Jake rolls backwards off the hood of the car. Half the locker room has emptied out into the parking lot at this point to try to intervene but Jake covered in mist just looks at Rosemary and says “I’m gonna knock your teeth down your fucking throat”. Rosemary is also yelling insults his way but Jake then starts to attack security and he jumps in a car also. Is he gonna chase Slayer down?

1 on 1 M3: Audrey Carbine defeats All Man via submission with The Art of Ballistics

Joe Gacy comes out grabs Audrey by the hair but in an intense friendship comeadery kind of way?? All Woman walks past them but Gacy grabs her by the hair and All Woman pleading no is able to low blow Gacy and then start punching Carbine down the ramp until All Man has the strength to get back up and hit Carbine with The Allman Joy

4 Way Dance M4: Ruckus defeats Champagne Clausen, Garrett Thompson, Leonard McGraw

(It becomes a 1 on 1 between Ruckus and Champagne essentially after GT no shows and as soon as Leonard hears that word he runs to the back)

During the match Leonard McGraw finds Ethan Bedlam and is basically just kicking his ass around the backstage/catering area. Pulling out all the spots, pouring every item of food you can find all over Bedlam. Meanwhile in the ring it’s Ruckus who secures the win over Champagne and Bryce comes down and goes punch for punch with Ruckus until Bryce clotheslines him out of the ring. Bryce even hits the 6 Rings on Champagne for good measure. Bryce amped up “Is this the Golden Bryce, Masato Tanaka said he needed time be?” - Kaitlyn Khaos “That probably didn’t include Bryce leaving his left for dead at the hands of The Set earlier tonight but...I don’t know maybe Masato is an odd guy” - Nick Simmonds

Kaitlyn Khaos and Nick Simmonds run down the match card for XPWEW Lockdown 7 __/___/ Lockdown 7 goes down May 23rd, 2020 in Rashid Stadium Slayer defends the XPWEW International Title against Jake Awesome, The Tag Team Titles are up for grabs as All Man and All Woman take on the Death Machines Audrey Carbine and Joe Gacy. The Women’s Title will be defended in a 3 Way Dance as Prisiclla Kelly puts it on the line against Doxy Deity and Kiera Hogan. Personal scores to be settled when Leonard McGraw takes on Garrett Thompson; Father vs Son. Troy Clausen wants Champagne to drop the name Clausen and if he defeats him 1 on 1 in a No Holds Barred match he’ll get his wish. Jordan Oliver puts up the XPWEW Juniorweight Title against the “original” Juniorweight himself Jacques Dudley and ultimately the XPWEW World Heavyweight Championship Title is on the line as Golden Bryce defends against Ruckus in a historic main event. Purchase Lockdown 7 on live streaming PPV on FITE TV for the low low price of $39.99 order now!

[[Jake Awesome is being followed by a camera man this whole time from the incident earlier tonight]] [Jake is walking into a Marriott hotel] Jake speaks with a Marriott employee

Jake: Hello miss, Yes is a Joseph Starven checked in? Marriott Employee: Yes, May I ask the reason. Jake : Yes I’m his brother, umm our father Marc has just passed away, I really really really need to tell him this in person. Family matter. Marriott Employee: I’m so sorry to hear that? Jake: Yep Marriott Employee: Name? Jake: Al Snow...Al Starven.. yeah Al Starven Marriott Employee: (on the phone)........Yes he’s in room 2679 he’s accepted the invite Jake: thank you so much [[Jake gets in elevator]]] commercial break [[Jake knocks on the door, Slayer opens it]] Jake attacks Slayer and throws him through the glass shower door and picks him up flings him over the bed, hits Slayer with the lamp. Then drags him to the outside balcony of his room on the 26th floor of this Marriott hotel. Jake has Slayer’s head over the railing Jake: I do not care anymore do you hear me!!!!! You got a week you fuckin slime Jake then releases Slayer Jake walks out the hotel room but before he leaves he puts the “Do Not Disturb” hanger on the doorknob.

Tag Team Match M5: Golden Bryce & Jacques Dudley defeats Jordan Oliver & Kotto Brazil (The Set)

6 Rings onto Kotto for the 630 splash and both Jacques and Bryce together pin Kotto for the 1-2-3

Golden Bryce gets on the turnbuckle and slaps his chest intensely as the show comes to an end

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (5-1-2020)

Friday Night Pyro #424 May 1st, 2020

Xtreme Rumble Recap video

Show Intro

Fireworks and Kaitlyn Khaos informs us tonight Golden Bryce will speak 1 on 1 with the 2020 Xtreme Rumble winner Ruckus PLUS: Big main event! Leonard McGraw will team for the first time ever with Jake Awesome as they take on the I-N champion Slayer and Garrett Thompson

Opening Segment:

Golden Bryce enters

Golden Bryce: For the 2nd year in a row I’ll be going into Lockdown as the world heavyweight champion but this time I’ll be defending it against someone very very deserving and that’s why I’d like to respectfully introduce him right now. Ladies and Gentlemen Ruckus

Ruckus with The Set enters

Golden Bryce congratulates Ruckus Bryce: In three weeks me and you have the ultimate privilege of making history. The first time a black champion defends against a black challenger for the richest prize in this industry-.... Ruckus: pfffft What? Bryce: confused Uh Ruckus: I don’t want that....I don’t care about it. History. Will history pay me? Will history feed my kids? I don’t care if I’m black and you are purple. I know that the world champion makes the most money. I won the rumble. 29 others didn’t. So that means yes I have a shot but understand up front right now so we ain’t got no confusion later. I DO NOT LIKE YOU. Ruckus: I don’t like how people even be talking about you? Like you’ve actually done something..People talk about this Golden Bryce nigga like he done something. I walk into XPWEW Headquarters and they’ve replaced posters and walls of Jake Awesome and put you up. How many titles have you won 4? I’ve won the tag team titles here 7 times. And twice I’ve been an international champion so somebody tell me how you getting put up on the wall? Golden Bryce: I didn’t pay anybody. I didn’t ask. I come in, I clock into my job. I entertain this people. Some cheer me. Some boo me. But those who boo me can live with that and that’s fine. Cheer me, great I’ll fight for those people until I can’t anymore Ruckus: Nah nah homie that ain’t my point. See this company from within us rotted out. If they think they tryna replace Jake Awesome they are dead wrong. You are not Jake Awesome and don’t act like you ain’t tweet a year back, I’m the new Jake. You look up to that man, you can’t stand the fact that that man hates your guts. Your childhood hero. But you fooled impressionable losers like Shane McCoy and Troy Clausen and Micheal Bradford. You must be doing under the table work round here cause you really getting a lot handed to you. So now every week for a year you either happy to finally get the title or you all bummed out, ass dragging, sad ass McGee and shit bout you ain’t get this, you ain’t got that. Then you carry yourself like you just doing you nah. Jake Awesome carried his own weight. Jake Awesome is a man. Jake Awesome earned that. You and maybe no fault of you own shit I don’t know but you ain’t even the best in that locker room as a matter of fact you one of the sloppiest and basic cats they got in there. So no I don’t like this confidence you got. We got an elite locker room and you the face of it. That the biggest pile of bullshit I’ve ever seen. You ain’t even top 80 thus industry ever seen. Me? Hey I’ve never been world champion but I’ve never lost a Lockdown. That’s right pimp 3-0. You lost to Jake last year and yet your ass on the y’all building in Bassett. I understand they don’t wanna see me win but you ain’t got no self awareness and that’s why I wanna smack the shit out you right now Golden: Why don’t you try it I’ll drop you where you stand Ruckus: Haha I know you got a baby on the way but don’t be surprised when it’s dark skinned.... (ooooooh) Bryce: Gets up close to Ruckus’ forehead Ruckus: slaps Bryce The Set starts attacking Bryce at the back of his knees (((Bryce and Ruckus start brawling)) Eventually Ruckus gets the upper hand The Set joins in and now a 5 on 1 attack as The Set attack Bryce relentlessly Ruckus then takes off his sock and then Jordan hands him a “pool balls” Yes the debut of billiards balls. Ruckus shoves 2 in a sock and starts mercifully beating down Bryce with it Myron and Kotto drag Bryce to the corner they pull his legs between the turnbuckle and all jump off the top rope mule kicking the back of his head At the end of the assault Ruckus pulls off Bryce’s Jordan 2’s and utters “Oh we gon’ sell these junts on eBay” Bryce is left in the ring by himself and he slowly gets himself up like this Incredible Hulk transformation on his face as this match just got took to the next level. Bryce grabs his title and slowly limps back to the locker room without any shoes on because The Set stole them

M1: XPWEW Women’s World Championship Prisiclla Kelly (c) defeats All Woman w/ All Man

After the match Brian Lee comes down and Prisiclla fights Lee off with a kendo stick that typically is Kiera’s weapon of choice Kiera comes down with THE MOST OBVIOUS WIG OF ALL TIME to hide her newly bald hair Kiera cuts promo at ramp: Rematch clause bitch! Re clap Match You and me! LD!

Doxy Deity runs right past her and snatched the weave from the back of Kiera’s head as it snatches her bald and Kiera explodes fuming in anger as she tries to hide her scalp with her hands

“You bitch”

Doxy then runs in the ring and goes forehead to forehead with Priscilla and oh shit this rivalry runs deep remember the barbed wire massacre at Anarchy Rules 2019 Doxy points at the Lockdown sign and Prisiclla just punches her and we got an all out brawl Prisiclla and Doxy trade punches Until Brian Lee recovers and hits both of them with 9-1-1 Kiera runs in and grabs her weave and then laughs maniacally grabbing Prisiclla’s title “Mine!!!!! This is mine!”

Joe Gacy enters

Audrey Carbine enters

M2: DeathMatch (Very very bloody) ((((Match of the night))) Audrey Carbine defeats Joe Gacy

After the match the both have a middle finger pointed right at the other but Gacy says you’ve earned my respect and now we have the team of “Death Machines” formed right before our eyes after beating the hell out of each other Gacy has now agreed to teaming with Audrey Carbine and man what a unit

Promo: Mandy Leon cuts promo hyping up Gotch as a killer with no emotions Champagne responds to which Troy comes down with a contract for Lockdown and Champagne shakes it off and ignored him at ringside the whole match

1 on 1 M3: Simon Gotch w/ Mandy Leon defeats Champagne Clausen

Troy Clausen runs in and presses the pen to Champagne’s chest. Champagne grabs the pen and then starts poking Troy in his eyes with it. Ultimately after stabbing Troy multiple times in the face with the pen it sparks blood and Champagne gruesomely signs the contract in his father’s blood then gets a new pen and signs his name and just like that it’s official Champagne vs Troy Clausen Father vs Son in a No Holds Barred

Champagne: No more talk, No more games. I’m gonna Murder you on the 23rd slams mic

Backstage: All Man tells All Woman All Man: Well maybe he’s not gonna get that 2nd world title reign And maybe you just are going to get your first women’s title reign. But after watching them it makes me think Why not us! All Woman: Why not who? All Man: Us? Why not us? Look at Carbine and Gacy absolutely brutalized each other just to BE partners. We are peanut butter and jelly, were milk milk lemonade All Woman: I think that second one is wrong but you mean it? Me and you. tag team champions. All Man: Why not? All Woman: We gotta get a tag win under our belt tonight and I’m not wasting any more time being and after thought let’s go tell Romeo

1 on 1 M3: Jacques Dudley defeats Dragon Kid

Romeo Roselli: announcement: Alveno La Flare cuts a promo and says if Jacques can beat him next week the winner will challenge Jordan Oliver for the juniorweight title at lockdown

Alveno La Flare shakes his mentor’s Jacques hand at ringside

Jake Awesome enters in street clothes (first appearance on Pyro in 7 months)

Jake Awesome addresses Lotus Jake: If I knew I was gonna get eliminated by a girl in the Rumble I probably wouldn’t have came back but sadly guys I got news that New Line Cinema dropped the Captain Falcon project and I worked hard on it and maybe some day that film will see the light of day

Slayer enters Slayer: And the Oscar for biggest Hollywood failure is......Joseph Alfonso While you were gone in Hollywood drinking boxed water and injecting steroids into your jawline I was here and I was the XPWEW International Champion the whole time You nearly faded away into obscurity but you left on a loss, you left like a chump. I’ve always been here. The distinction between us was always neck and neck and deep down I always knew you were the weaker link despite any article you read or any opinion that wants to spout out the mouth. To me you’ve always been jealous To me you’ve done less but always gotten all the glory. It’s never what Slayer did for this promotion it’s always what “Jake” did oh Jake did this, Jake accomplished that. I’ve proved I WILL DIE to win in this ring You will leave it You’ll leave this industry and hope your little brother Casey might be able to do it well he’s been in developmental for a year and absolutely nothing Lotus on the other hand, My own daughter eliminated you from the rumble on Sunday. However I didn’t win I won’t the next best thing But in my mind my plan was to leave you broken When you left it was the larvae who derailed you not Hollywood, please don’t mislead the fans here I put you out on your ass and you came back and Lotus ended it for ya Lotus even wanted me to ask she wants you 1 on 1 next week Jake: And she’s got it Jake: All my career I’ve had to brush no pun intended there didn’t mean to press a “thorn” into your side. Slayer: shakes his head Jake: The Starven Family continues to haunt my career lol Lotus has a lot to say a little odd for you to be speaking for her, She’s an outspoken woman. She’s tough she wants to go toe to toe with the men here I respect that and I’ll grant her that but Joey me and you go back and you know better than else I can’t win in any circumstance and after I beat her Friday I wanna let you be on notice. I’m coming for you. Me and you we’ve never had that classic Lockdown match ever and I wanna do just that. But not really for your appeasement I want that points at International Championship I’ve never been the International Champion and online I see the posts, I see the memes that I’ll never be a Grand Slam champion well guess what I’m gonna do that I’m gonna chase that title and only that title So that’s a reminder that all the mind games you wanna trap in my way mean nothing and I will leave Lockdown 7 the XPWEW International Champion. Slayer: Times past bud, You don’t make the decisions around here. It’s over. They took down your murals, they took down Jake Awesome we don’t look to you as the leader anymore so ship up and shape up and get with the program you aren’t the captain anymore. And you’ve been gone so long you forgot the hierarchy that I make the decisions and I decide that you just go back home and let me do what I do. Just go home. Never come back. We were all so close to forgetting you anyway......

Tag Team Match M4: Jake Awesome & Leonard McGraw defeat Garrett Thompson and Slayer

Jake pins Slayer clean with the awesome bomb, buckshot combo assist from McGraw

After the match Lotus and Rosemary come down and Rosemary sprays mist in Jake’s eyes then Lotus puts him in a Helm Sharpshooter but McGraw grabs her off and nearly strikes her but doesn’t

Backstage: Siaka Lexoni talks to Robbie Williams “remember our old team, consider you an honorary member of The Set tonight” *Robbie smiles puts outs the shirt on

Robbie Williams enters

Golden Bryce enters

1 on 1 M5: Golden Bryce defeats Robbie Williams

Interference from Myron Reed as he hits Bryce with his own title belt immediately after the match. Ruckus who’s smoking a blunt inhales and exhales on Bryce’s face Ruckus sets up smoking his bleezy in the corner Myron sets up a table

And Myron, Kotto, Jordan and Lexoni all pick a leg or arm of Bryce and hoist him up collectively in the air and Bryce crashes through the table

Ruckus just watches as he smokes his blunt against the turnbuckle

Ruckus ashes out the blunt on Bryce’s chest and then hits a cocky pin on him as The Set pose around him and Jordan Oliver takes photos for Instagram

Show Ends

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (4-17-2020)

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro #422 April 17th, 2020 Los Angeles, California The Barracks

Opening Segment:

Leonard McGraw enters “On April 26th I see 29 others. I see 29 pathetic sodomites pissing their damn pants at the idea they gotta fight me. Well I’ve been in fights before and I ain’t scared to fight again and if any sorry son of a Bitch think they got the guts to tell me I’m done then they need a god damn reality check. Golden Bryce.... Golden Bryce? What exactly makes you golden boy? Cause all I smelled last week was a trail a piss running down your damn leg. I sensed fear. I smelled fear. Then you opened your damn lips and said “I’m the world champion” Turns out I was just smelling bullshit -Golden Bryce enters Spills typical babyface rhetoric Leonard: You got that pretty piece of hardware up in your shoulder there. Lot of gold. What kinda wood is that Cherry? Oak? Pine? Bamboo? Did I say something funny? Cause like I said from the beginning next Sundey I will win the rumble match. I will look you in them beety little eyes and as far as I’m considered son. . .

The Set enters Siaka gives Ruckus a epic entrance on the mic Ruckus: McGriddle you must new around here nigga. If you wanna call your spots you better call them shits early. But homie last week I said I was winning the rumble and I’m gonna SET my claim and main event Lockdown 7

Garrett Thompson enters with Ethan Bedlam Garrett Thompson: You blokes must’ve bumped ya bloody heads together. If anyone is gonna main event Lockdown it’s me. See in 2013 I did just that at Lockdown 5 and now I’m making my way back but Leonard McGraw I’m gonna do it over your dead boy smiles Bryce: You wanna back that up? Ethan Bedlam: You wanna fight? Leonard McGraw: Can y’all just shut your damn traps. Ruckus I respect what you do in this ring and I.... Garrett Thompson: Hey! Hey! Hey! Don’t overlook me? That’s a sign of weakness McGraw... Leonard McGraw: Bryce give me a beat (Golden Bryce smiling shaking his head) snaps ^fangers Ethan Bedlam and GT. fingers in they ass - Crumpets and Tea. Get in this ring and you’ll see. Hit you with my buckshot D-E-A-D Hahahahahaha well that was rap wouldn’t it? Jordan Oliver you silly sum bitch you look like Ellen Degeneres put a god damn shirt on boy Siaka Lexoni? Lexoni? What is that tired? You’ve been around a while ain’t ya boy? I can tell I see the tread marks on your damn face. Look at ya Butch Reed? What exactly Natural about you son? Myron: it’s Myron..It’s Myron Reed Leonard: Oh my bad my bad. Butch must be Jordan cause he looks like he’s on Queer Street and liking it. Calm down Kotto B. Ware [[[SEGMENT OF THE FUCKIN YEAR RIGHT HERE]]]]

Kaitlyn Khaos & Nick Simmonds on commentary inform us tonight’s main event!

Golden Bryce will team up with Leonard McGraw to take on Ethan Bedlam & Garrett Thompson

Alveno La Flare enters

Jacques Dudley enters *They shake hands before they begin 1 on 1 M1: Jacques Dudley defeats Alveno La Flare

PROMO! All Man will enact his XPWEW world title rematch against Golden Bryce at the Xtreme Rumble. All Man:

Backstage: James Westerbeck tries to get an interview with Kiera Hogan and cant get around her security guard 911 Brian Lee Eventually Kiera opens the door and says that Priscilla is a bitch for messing with her hair last week but that’s fine because she’s challenging her to a hair vs hair match at Xtreme Rumble. “This isn’t about my title, you’ve made it personal. Period”

Joe Gacy on commentary (((Commentary recaps what’s transpired between Gacy trying to find Croyle’s replacement as tag team champion and we take a look at the last 2 weeks of try-hard Solomon Nasty)))

Solomon Nasty enters

Slayer, Rosemary & Lotus enters

M2: 1 on 1 XPWEW International Title (not on the line) Slayer w/ Lotus & Rosemary defeats Solomon Nasty

Joe Gacy challenges Solomon Nasty to a tables match at Xtreme Rumble shoves mic onto him. Cause I got a partner and I’m gonna reveal that partner after I make an example out of you next Sunday.

XPWEW Women’s Title (not on the line) 1 on 1 M3: Kiera Hogan (c) w/ Brian Lee defeats [[Jobber]] Melanie Weister

After the match: Prisiclla Kelly with some hair clippers starts wildly and manically shaving the head of this jobber talent Melanie Weister as a warning to Women’s Champion Kiera Hogan ahead of their HAIR vs HAIR match next Sunday at the 2020 Xtreme Rumble

Backstage: Golden Bryce putting on his knee pads and adjusting ring gear; Leonard McGraw approaches him. Leonard: I know out there it was all jokes, Hey I can be a funny guy. But when the cards are down and the chips are in I’m here for one reason and that’s to be the world heavyweight champion...inhales cause a great man once said if you don’t wanna be world champion then why the fuck are you here. I say piss on everyone else and get what you want. Tonight we’re a team but not really. slaps his bicep

*Winner will get the “best” number in the Xtreme Rumble 1 on 1 M4: Champagne Clausen defeats Jake “The Boy Scout” Manning

slow applause Troy Clausen and Freight Train (holding Lockdown 7 contract) Troy: Bravo Curtis. You’ve won the”best” number in the Rumble. But you should really call it the best AVAILABLE number because son ive hired someone and I myself have purchased #30...

Mandy Leon enters Mandy: Troy kisses her hand My client is a Marauder. A raider. A highwayman and the road to Lockdown be damned. Champagne consider yourself warned ;) -Mandy Leon exits Troy: She’s pretty huh and Curtis your fianc�� is beautiful as well. Hell Tonight I was suppose to be interviewed by Mrs. Khaos (((Camera shows Kaitlyn Khaos hiding her face looking a bit embarrassed)) Troy: Hey Kaitlyn you’re welcome for your job. Glad to see you are two faced for seeing what he did to me for the past 6 months yet you remained silent. I know you knew about it you snake in the grass Kaitlyn Khaos: He’s out of line, this isn’t my business. Nick Simmonds comforts her a bit to ease the tension Champagne: Dad Shut you mouth and eat you mush. If you keep pushing me, now you’ve pushed my fiancé. I don’t care what vanilla midget she’s behind but he’s gonna have one hell of a lackluster debut. And as for Troy Clausen. You are an attention seeker. You are a clout chaser and I’m not gonna let you use your Memphis-ass promo on my family. My new family. If you so much as mention her again I’ll do more than put you to sleep Troy: You wanna play hardball. Then I’ll play. Just don’t injure your hand in the rumble. I want you to be able to sign this contract after :)....

Ethan Bedlam enters

Garrett Thompson enters

Leonard McGraw enters

Golden Bryce enters

Main Event Tag Team Match 2 on 2 M5: Leonard McGraw & Golden Bryce defeat Garrett Thompson & Ethan Bedlam

. Bryce is in position lying in wait to hit Bedlam with his 6 Rings spear but out of camera view McGraw blind tags Bryce jumps over the rope does a spin and basically hits a “Tornado”. version of the Buckshot clothesline for the 1-2-3

Bryce and McGraw celebrate the win in their own ways separately. McGraw then extends his right hand for Golden Bryce to shake but then hits a classic “too slow” and then rolls out the ring and walks up the ramp without looking back with a sly grin on his face. Bryce then looks down knowing he “got, got”. Leonard talking to camera: I didn’t come hear to make friends (incoherent dialogue) ((Bryce pounds his chest and screams with the title above his head)) Show ends

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (4-10-2020)

Friday Night Pyro #421 April 10th, 2020 Los Angeles, California The Barracks

Opening Segment: Troy Clausen enters the ring with GM Romeo Roselli who is holding a contract for a “Lockdown 7 match between himself (Troy) vs Champagne Clausen Troy: Last week I rose from the dead! I told the world that my son would be nothing without me! I taught him everything he knows but I’m just a little bit quicker, smarter. I’m more violent. Curt was raised wealthy and privileged. He was like Richie Rich in upstate New York growing up. He had everything. Well I didn’t. A lot of people ask me how I gained my wealth. I hit the lottery when I was 34. I wanted to be a professional wrestler but instead with my new found fortune I funded this company in 2005 along with my constituents. I let business overtake. I wanted to be in the ring. I wanted to live vicariously through my son but my son isn’t a hero. My son is a villain. I’m a hero. I wouldn’t have mercifully beaten up The Freight Train. I LOVE FREIGHT TRAIN! I LOVE PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING! AND DAMN IT I LOVE THE FANS!

Champagne enters Champagne: Everything you just said. IRRELEVANT. You! IRRELEVANT! Even that silly clipboard with those empty words on that Lockdown 7 match contract between me and you? IRRELEVANT. I will be in the main event that night, cause in 2 weeks I’ll be winning the 2020 Xtreme Rumble match and I won’t BE in a match with you. Besides. I wrestle real competition. I wrestle real professional wrestlers. Troy: Well that’s quite the coincidence because in the several months I was out of action I was trained by a professional wrestler. That’s right an old grizzled veteran. In Greensboro, North Carolina I traveled and I was trained by the great

Freight Train enters to jubilation Freight Train: Troy Clausen is a trained professional wrestler! The same man who trained me down there in Greensboro Carolina the man himself George South

George South and son (also wrestler) Jake “The Boy Scout” Manning enters to “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey [[Geroge South wrestled for the NWA back in the 80’s pretty much a job guy but has wrestled Flair many times. He still wrestles today and is most known for his podcast “You don’t work Dad, You wrestle” with his son Jake “The Boy Scout” Manning.

Champagne: LMAOOOOOO The Boy Scout? George South? Is that your name? Lol. You were trained by these guys. Go back to your trailer in Greensboro and talk into some cheap podcast equipment and talk about the good days. Hey George have you ever won a match? Like, ever?

Champagne gets in George South’s face, Jake “The Boy Scout” Manning apprehends him to back up George South: Champagne in 2013 you attended my school with HIGHSPOTS and I distinctly remember afterwards you went off on a tangent saying you were the best, this and that, with your nose up in the air at the other fellas and gals trying to chase the same dream as you. You left the school when I said you were too sloppy and you needed to tighten up in the ring and you left. You told me I was a nobody and I don’t have the business training anybody. Well I’ve trained WWE Cedric Alexander that’s a Cruiserweight Champion. I’ve trained Tessa Blanchard Yep that’s the first ever women’s world wrestling champion over there making an IMPACT! I thought I was gonna train you but I’ve spent the past few months training your daddy so he can BEAT YOU Champagne: What’s that? Sorry George I don’t speak hick. Champagne: (looks at Train) I don’t speak retard either (groan dull poor taste) Champagne: (looks at Jake Manning) and the Boy Scout? That’s your thing? Boy Scout With that questionable mustache you look like someone who has the Tik Tok app on his phone and doesn’t have an account. Someone check this guy George South: What’s wrong with you? I’m gonna tell your boy. If you got a problem with my son and me then why don’t you say it Champagne: I do have a problem but now you do. You and me. Let’s go. George South: (looks at Romeo) Well if that’s okay with the General manager I’d challenge you to your own match! That’s right! A Clausen Cleaver match!

(Freight Train Pulls out a Magic Marker from his jacket and draws a poorly done squiggly line not even halfway in the middle of the canvas (George South side is much bigger) Champagne: huh huh I’m not even gonna complain at those odds.

Clausen Cleaver Match M1: Champagne Clausen defeats George South

During the match an attempt to interfere from Troy Clausen was thwarted when Troy shoved in a steel chair toward a downed George South and a standing Champagne stepped on the chair “Thanks” Champagne proceeded to whack South over the back with the steel chair several times until kicking him over his ill-equal line of the Cleaver and pinning South clean 1-2-3

Troy: That’s fine you wanna continue to be a brat, you wanna drag our business out into the mainstream. Well I can play dirty Pal in fact I do it better than anybody ever has in this industry. So Champagne Clausen next week I’m gonna invite people from your past, your present and your future and I’m gonna expose you and I’m gonna embarrass you and at Lockdown I’m gonna give you a beating your father should have given you before...... (intentional botch to enhance Troy’s babyface character)

James Westerbeck interviews The Set (mostly Jordan Oliver) on his current streak as he prepares to fight world champ Golden Bryce tonight. Jordan: I’m 8-0 never been defeated in the year 2020, never lost a match in this DECADE! The real champ is the Juniorweight title and remember that streak of Jacques Dudley’s back in 2012, well that’s nothing on me. I’m swimming with sharks and it’s blood in the water pimpin’. Golden Shower boy is gonna get a kick in the face courtesy of me Jordan Oliver so get that, got that? Good. Mark. (Ruckus is rubbing Oliver’s shoulders behind him) Ruckus: “My boy Jawdan. This my son right here. I f*** with this n**** the long way and new blood cap glock gang rag gang

VIGNETTE Mandy Leon hypes “Mid-evil Marauders” coming soon

1 on 1 M2: Priscilla Kelly defeats Doxy Deity

Post match promo Lotus goes on tangent on how Prisiclla is at her core the thing wrong with modern feminism, toxic and nasty. Doing the right cause the WRONG way. Prisiclla responds “Your whole family has this moral compass high horse how about you shut your mouth”

Lotus responds “Eat those words Prisiclla let it fester in the gristle of your guts :)

Soloman Nasty pleads Joe Gacy go give him ONE MORE CHANCE! Gacy says fine I respect a guy who doesn’t give up

M3: Myron Reed & Kotto Brazil defeat Joe Gacy & Soloman Nasty

Reed puns Nasty after a 450 splash from the 2nd rope

After the match Gacy helps Soloman Nasty up and just when he seems to let him be “The Plagueground” replacing Croyle during injury. Up the ramp Gacy hits Soloman with both tag titles and gorilla presses him onto the steel grate of the stage and leaves him in a whole heap of mess

Backstage: [[FUNNY] All Man is listening to Doja Cat “Say So” embarrassingly making a Tik Tok to it He talks to All Woman and says I’ve been going viral recently! Chainmail are back! Milkmen might be back to work country-wide. My title reign really resonated with people. All Woman: You did it :) You did it ALL by yourself :) All Man smiles corny-like in front of an American flag and chugs a chocolate Nesquik

Garrett Thompson & Ethan Bedlam join commentary and run down Leonard McGraw and Ryu

MATCH OF THE NIGHT RIGHT HERE 1 on 1 M4: Leonard McGraw w/ Ryu defeat Alveno La Flare

PROMO: Lockdown 7 is 40 days away

PROMO: Golden Bryce BANG! Energy commercial

1 on 1 Juniorweight vs World Heavyweight Golden Bryce DEFEATS (8-0) Jordan Oliver

back and forth match. At one point referee Kevin Madrox does a great “YOURE OUTTA HERE” to The Set at ringside (Myron, Kotto, Ruckus, Lexoni & Chrissy Rivera)

Jordan is going for the “Clout Cutter” and Bryce hits the 6 rings on Oliver’s BACK ((Total innovative way to spear someone to their back as Oliver flings off the top rope to the middle of the ring, reverse 6 rings. 1-2-3 and just like that Jordan Oliver takes his first L of the year

Bryce looks at the camera and breaks the 4th wall a bit gives a “hey why not” look Raises Jordan’s Juniorweight title as well as his own World Heavyweight Title both in the air as the show goes off the air!

VICE NETWORK 2020™️

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (3-20-2020)

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro March 20th, 2020 Los Angeles, California The Barracks

Show Intro

We are introduced to our commentary team for the evening as usual Kaitlyn Khaos followed by Nick Simmonds they introduce tonight’s show with the announcement that “The Set” has reserved the following segment you are about to witness and they swing it over to a video production.

(Setting. Philadelphia. Nighttime. Night life vibe. <We are shown a inner city street with kids playing outside and people loitering around with loud music playing, A lot of pot smoke it the air> The camera pans into the house in the middle of the street with dozens of people inside then in the living room you see xpwew Juniorweight Champion Jordan Oliver saying what’s up to the camera then in the hallway you see more random people followed by Myron Reed, Kotto Brazil, Chrissy Rivera and Siaka Lexoni then the camera zooms even more into a back bedroom where we see Ruckus for the first time since his arrest last December. <<Ruckus is smoking a blunt getting his braids done by this girl chewing bubble gum very particularly>> <<<Ruckus looks into the camera and speaks directly to you>>>

Ruckus: I know y’all have been wondering where the fuck Ruckus been the last couple months (coughs) Shit y’all probably been thinking where the fuck Ruckus been in a whole minute you know what I’m saying (ha) See I ain’t left! I ain’t been nowhere! I’ve been home I’ve been maxing I’ve been relaxing Still getting paid but I’m 2nd to none and y’all ain’t seen nothing yet (hits blunt) You niggas gon’ see a hell of a lot more of me in the near near future (coughs) Stay tuned <<<Kotto Brazil palms the camera ending the video

<<The Set enters (Jordan Oliver, Kotto Brazil, Myron Reed, Chrissy Rivera, Siaka Lexoni and RUCKUS!!!!!>>>

Jacques Dudley enters with Alveno La Flare and the team of 3M3

M1: Ruckus defeats Jacques Dudley

After the match Dragon Kid comes off to fend off Jordan Oliver ahead of their matchup next Sunday at Blitzkrieg Jordan @ Kid “You lucky Tim McGraw ain’t wet you up yet little boy!”

M2: Dragon Kid & Alveno La Flare defeats Siaka Lexoni & Kotto Brazil

Dragon Kid gets the roll up pin on Lexoni but immediately after The Set attacks Kid and La Flare and now the next match flows ever so effortlessly. <<< Very NWA Powerrr-ish but it’s effective because there is no crowd

<<<<Freight Train rolls out Troy Clausen to the front row>>>> Popcorn and laughter from them all show

M3: Myron Reed defeats M3 Quintillo

“That’s the Set 2 and these 4 gentlemen 1” surely the score between these “sets” get squashed at Blitzkrieg in just 9 days

LOCKDOWN 7 PROMO 64 Days Away

In Ring Segment: Garrett Thompson and Ethan Bedlam

Garrett Thompson & Ethan Bedlam explain that they are completely satisfied that they broke the arm of Leonard McGraw last week Garrett: “It was so chilling, no audience either just silence and it was a sexual rush for me watching <<<Going for the cheap heat>> McGraw comes on the Titan tron “You sum bitches. You happy happy joy joy sun bitches. Garrett Thompson you’ve been in this illustrious business how many years now BOY! Where is your gold? Where is your stripes. Well as far as Your ass is considered son that Ass is mine and that ass is striped cause I’ll tell you like this. I’m gonna rehab this arm and when I ain’t sitting like the tin man. I’m fixing to slap the piss out of both of you sons of bitches. Matter of fact. Why don’t I do it right now. <<<<<McGraw in an arm sling is standing behind GT and Bedlam>>>> McGraw (WITH AN ARM SLING) attacks them both to the best of his abilities but eventually the numbers game catches up and Bedlam grabs the crutches and beats McGraw down and GT eventually gets up and gains the upper hand “All your friends are dead Leo, whataya gonna do” GT wields the crutches up in the air and little 95 pound Ms. Ryu steps between them in attempt to stop the onslaught of her implied guy Leonard McGraw

<<GT backs down momentarily to Ryu’s wishes to stop the beatdown>> <<<<GT grabs Ryu’s hand and kisses her hand>>>> Ryu is very upset and isn’t phased by the hand kiss from GT Bedlam: Now get your bullocks outta my sight

Freight Train stands up and cuts a hilarious “Water Boy Bobby Booshay”-like promo about how GT and Bedlsm are bully’s and they need help

<<Plagueground enters>> Croyle; Now I’m no Leonard McGraw fan but he’s a non factor now. He’s a broken man. But GT and Ethan you two are ripe for the Pickens!!!!

M4: Brodie Croyle defeats Ethan Bedlam

(Leonard McGraw and Ryu on commentary) RYU SPEAKS ENGLISH NOW?!?!?!?!??

Backstage Interview: James Westerbeck asks Champagne Clausen what’s in his head knowing his father will be ringside. Champagne: Vegetables don’t speak.....

Pre-Recorded segment: Slayer working in the ring actively with Lotus teaching her some tips of the trade. It’s a great moment to see them interacting positively and you can tell Lotus looks up to Slayer Slayer then sends a quick message as he’s laying down the gauntlet for an open challenge in 9 days at Blitzkrieg for his XPWEW International Title....

M5: Lotus & Rosemary defeats Doxy Deity & Genevalisse

Pre-Recorded segment: All Man visits Scott Steiner in the hospital Easily a potential XTREMEY award winner Hilarious segment Steiner: They got me in this stinkin’ hospital there’s Corona Virus everywhere and they won’t sanitize the big bad booty daddy’s room Steiner slaps the ass of his nurse who looks fed up with Steiner’s antics All Man: don’t you wanna come home? Steiner: HOME?!?!?!?!?? Are you kidding me I’m having the time of my life here. Free food did you get your belt back All Man: well that’s what I’m here to talk about. In 9 days I’m gonna get it back Steiner: <<<<grabs All Man by the scruff of his neck>>>>> (Steiner talks in his real voice for the first time ever) All Man. I want you to get in the gym. Train. Eat. Train. Eat. Train and train again. I was only world champion once and it eats at me knowing I never won the title a Second time. I’m asking you NO! I am TELLING you. Beat the shit out of that Smug Bastard Curtis Clausen. Beat the bricks off of that Weak Punk Gold and Ice All Man: Golden Bryce? Steiner: Are you even listening to me. Don’t regret anything. Eat them alive!!!! Consequences WILL NEVER BE THE SAME DO YOU HEAR ME All Man: Yes sir....

M6: Main Event Champagne Clausen & XPWEW Women’s Champion Kiera Hogan vs All Man & All Woman

All Woman gets the victory on Champagne in a SHOCKING upset All Man and All Woman hug and scurry out of the ring as its great momentum for All Man in 9 days at Blitzkrieg

Golden Bryce enters with the title around his waist and stares at All Man at the entrance way

<<<<Bryce removes the belt around his waist and holds it up in All Man’s face “Bryce: I ain’t going nowhere no time soon dog”

Champagne looks over at Freight Train and Troy Clausen sitting alone in the crowd, Champagne jumps the rail and flips the wheelchair over with his dad in it Everyone (Bryce, All Man, Train, All Woman) quickly goes over to help Troy Clausen (still in a vegetated state) back upright after Champagne dumped him out of his wheelchair

Champagne walks up the empty stairway

Kaitlyn Khaos on commentary: “It’s always gotta be about Champagne”

Show ends

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Anarchy Rules 2018 (9-29-2018)

Anarchy Rulz 2018 Queens, New York Arther Ashe Stadium Convention Center September 29th, 2018

Kandi Khaos joins Shane the real McCoy on commentary

Tanahashi enters the arena to a huge ovation

* crowd chants for Cena

Golden Bryce appears to huge boos

M1: Golden Bryce vs Tanahashi w/ Feebee Kinoshiba

Golden Bryce wins

M2: Deathmatch Heavens Gate Championship Romeo Roselli vs GG

GG wins

M3: Joe Gacy vs RETURNING Amy Lee

Joe Gacy wins but pulls Amy Lee up lets the crowd give her great ovation

*Backstage: Jaques Dudley reveals new blonde hair Troy Clausen. Dons the name change of Jaques Clausen

M4: Barbed-Wire Massacre XPWEW World Tag Team Championships 1776 vs TakaNaka

*fan actually jumps in the ring and attacks Leonard McGraw during the match and Masato and Taka beat the hell out of him

Takanaka wins and our the new tag team champions

Backstage: Marc Snow preys to God “Give my son this title tonight” please please

Delisa Alfonso joins the commentary team with Shane & Kandi

*Jake Awesome comes out to huge boos from this Queens crowd that has never been found of him

M5: Dog Collar Match Brodie Croyle vs Jake Awesome Brodie wins and Jake is completely soaked in blood and can't stand up on his own after the match became a gloried handicap with continual Edwards interference

*next match immediately begins

M6: Submission Match Eddie Edwards vs Jake Awesome **Eddie wins

*Eddie walks around and just looks at Jake Awesome like a heap of meat left for the vultures. Gets down and applies the crossface and Awesome tries to gain momentum but just ends up tapping

*next match immediately begins

M7: First Blood Match Will Olaffub vs Jake Awesome

Ollafub wins in 0 seconds due to the blood already existent on Jake's face from the jump. bell rings and bell immediately rings again

*next match immediately begins

M8: I Quit Match Steve Blackman vs Jake Awesome

*this is probably the most disturbingly chilling match in XPWEW history *I've never seen Jake or honestly anyone ever look so defeated

*Jake is covered in blood and looks dead he's still in nearly the same spot from the Brodie match. blood from head and leaking down his legs. The white gear he's wearing is not doing any favors.

Blackman honestly drags it out and the crowd absolutely loves it

Blackman then kicks Jake Awesome in the face and the back of the head repeatedly 21 times consecutively. Jake looks dead. Emergency EMTs stand by knowing best to not get involved in the action watch on in the distance outside the ring

21 straight shinzo kicks around the 15th Laura Vandervoort junmps the rail and tries to cover Jakes head but Blackman kicks it anyway security tries to get but Edwards and Croyle hold down the ropes and start throwing barbed wire from the earlier massacre match over the ropes as a guard

Jake essentially unconscious can't say I Quit

Troy Clausen and Micheal Bradford as well as arena staff come out and Clausen gives this shoot "stop" shaking hands at Blackman

dulling silence hits the crowd until the PA announces and your winner Steve Blackman

On commentary Kandi Khaos said she has a weak stomach and can't watch much more

Awesome is drove off in strecther cart up the ramp to middle fingers and other debris threw at him

M9: XPWEW World Heavyweight Championship 3 way 60 minutes Iron Man match

Slayer vs Jaques Clausen vs Ruckus

Ruckus pins Jaques Ruckus pins Slayer Ruckus 2 Slayer 0 Jaques 0 Slayer pins Ruckus Ruckus pins Slayer Ruckus 3 Slayer 1 Jaques 0 Jaques pins Slayer Jaques pins Slayer again right after Jaques pins Ruckus Ruckus 3 Jaques 3 Slayer 1 **Marc Snow interfears and hits Ruckus with the title and puts Slayer over him Slayer pins Ruckus Slayer submits Ruckus Ruckus 3 Jaques 3 Slayer 3 ***3 minutes left *Slayer applies hold on Jaques nothing..he wont tap 2 minutes left Ruckus hits the bank roll on both of them and Troy Clausen pulls him out 1 minute left Slayer rolls on top of Jaques Slayer 4 Ruckus 3 Jaques 3 *Marc Snow carries Slayer up the ramp with 52 seconds left Ruckus chopblocks Marc Snow 32 seconds left Al Snow jumps out of porta potty stage prop by the entrance way hits Ruckus in the back of the head with a glass lamp and lamp shade Ruckus crumbles and Clausen can't wait up a prone Jaques in the ring as time expires Final: Slayer 4 Ruckus 3 Jaques 3 AND NEWWWWW XPWEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION SLAYER!!!!!

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (8-24-2018)

Friday Night Pyro August 24th, 2018 Irvine, California @ The UCI Colosseum

Match Card: M1: Eddie Edwards def. Robbie Williams (No Limit First Round) M2: Golden Bryce def. Vinny Testaverde (Golden Bryce debut) M3: Slayer def. Awesome (Guest Ref: Marc Snow & Mick Foley) M4: The McGraws def. Mondo Milk ENT M5: Tanahashi def. Kota Ibushi M6: Jaques Dudley def. Chris Johnson & Champagne Clausen M7: Romeo Roselli def. GG (camerman) after time expires M8: The Truth Infantry (Edwards, Croyle & Blackman) w/ Will Olaffub def. TakaNaka, Pac, Rey Mysterio & Ruckus

Detailed Events:

No Limits Championship Tournament Quarter-Final Match M1: Eddie Edwards w/ Will Olaffub, Steve Blackman & Croyle def. Robbie Williams via submission

*Robbie Williams slow to get up gets medical treatment and has his arm in a sling and as he is getting carted to the back. Steve Blackman grabs Robbie and destroys him in quick fashion, soon Croyle and Edwards even get some cheap shots in and Edwards re-applies his finishing submission hold Crossface as paramedics pull him off

*Troy Clausen with Joel Gertner comes out during the mugging of Robbie and he screams at The Truth Infantry “What are you doing?, Olaffub orders Edwards to stop as The Truth Infantry slowly walk past Clausen with their arms up as if to say they aren’t guilty of attacking a defenseless hurt wrestler. Robbie doesn’t look good.

Troy: (up to Ollafub and Infantry on top of ramp) If you guys all wanna get physical tonight, Well then you got it! 6 man tag match, Truth Infantry versus Ruckus, Pac & Rey Mysterio later tonight.

Olaffub: (answering confidently as the infantry smiles deviantly) Not a problem, as a matter of fact Troy why a 6 man tag, How about 2 on say…..5

Troy: Alright, if you jagaloons got a death wish then fine. 5 is what you want, 5 is what you are gonna get, Ruckus, Pac & Mysterio. Now you got all of them plus, 2. The 2 being men who happen to be the greatest tag team in this industry, Taka Naka on top of that! Good luck

Blackman grabs mic from Olaffub: Troy, you are gonna look stupid at the end of the night. I guarantee it.

M2: Golden Bryce def. Vinny Testaverde

Bryce wins in dominant fashion

Human Resources Help!!!!! *Mick Foley comes out to the ring then brings out Jake Awesome and says he has to be motivated and that one loss and one occurence of him tapping out doesn't mean the world is over

*Jake Awesome responds almost confused as to why Mick has brought him here and gurantees yes indeed, he tapped out at heatwave but if given the chance to take on Slayer again. He wouldn't do it again. Jake thanks Mick for his help and Mick Foley responds claiming "I AM THE #1 JAKE AWESOME FAN!"

*Slayer with Marc Snow comes out at the end. Fine Speech Mick, Jake Awesome to these people will always be the hero. Jake Awesome will always be the champion. Regardless, of who is holding it. and here we are show #2 of the “spark is back” but where exactly is the title. He was the last champion, I made him tap even with a biased officiator. I deserve gold. Mick: Slayer, Mr. Clausen has informed me not to spill this news but I thank the fans RIGHT HERE in Irvine, California (cheap pop) need to know this information. The new XPWEW world heavyweight champion will be crowned at Anarchy Rulz. Next week, more details will be revealed Marc Snow: interrupts, Mick! more details revealed my son should have the belt! Where is it! Where is the belt! My son should have it. Mick: Marc I don’t think we’ve formally met, I do know about the urban legend. The urban legend that this crowd is chanting. Your independent persona of Nick Foley, in the 90’s where you sold counterfeit 8 x 10’s claiming you were me. I don’t hold any grudges against you I get it. You gotta put ice cream in the freezer. I know the stories. but Marc, one thing I won’t tolerate from you is the sass leaking from your quivering lip. Marc: Mick Mick: No, No for 20 years I tolerated you profiting from MY NAME, MY LEGACY, watching you maintain a living pretending to be me! A cheap version of mick foley, So how dare you call me biased. Maybe I’m taking this a little too far na maybe I’m letting my 20 years of aggression against you leak out in this trivial argument: No, don’t bow up at me it’s trivial. You still won the match. You still beat the mammoth. but how dare Marc Snow call me biased. A man who held a bias against his youngest son, a bias for your entire life (pointing at Slayer). I do’t know how you can just apologize with this snake. Marc I don’t even wanna see your face. You can call me bias, but you can’t call me an abusive father. You can’t call me a bias parent and you damn sure can’t teach me a damn thing about being without morals. I broke my body in half on every continent to provide for my family, not take all the loot and leave them for dead and then come back to my sons life twenty years later asking for a handout. I’ve lost respect for you Slayer, so yeah I had a bias against a guy that can make amends with this liar. Marc: Mick, I’m in a decent mood tonight and I’m trying so desperately not to punch you in your fat bearded face but what the hell *Jake Awesome slaps Marc Snow down to the ground and then attacks Slayer repetitively. (Slayer and Marc Snow powder out of the ring.) *Mick: Marc, I know you’ve spilt blood. but I know you haven’t spilled as much as me but tonight. I’m gonna put the Zebra stripes back on (pulls off Red flannel to unveil Zebra flannel)

Heatwave rematch tonight! Slayer vs Jake Awesome

Mick: And Marc Snow, to assure you and your baby boy aren’t a victim of bad officiating. You can wear the stripes too. Jake Awesome will NOT lose again.

Slayer: I don’t wanna wait let’s do this right now

*Guest Referees: Mick Foley & Marc Snow M3: Slayer def. Jake Awesome

so much interaction between Snow and Foley, Slayer mouths a lot to Foley throughout

Slayer def. Jake via submission yet again. Awesome taps and Foley doesn’t know how to react as he hesitates yet still raises Slayer’s hand in victory

Mick: Jake, even Michael Jordan missed a few shots, even Tom Brady lost a super bowl, Jake Awesome, I still think you are the best professional wrestler this industry has ever seen. Jake barely acknowledges Mick and just walks to the curtain looking at the ground.

M4: The McGraws def. Mondo Milk ENT *The McGraws run down the crowd praising Alex Jones to be their manager. The McGraws now dub themselves. 1776. Massive heat basically white heat from their post match promo about Obama being born in Kenya

M5: Tanahashi def. Kota Ibushi with a knee to Kota mid-air going for his shooting star press. Tanahshi sneaks the win.

*Interview: Kandi Khaos speaks with Jaques Dudley tonight on his match with Chris Johnson and Champagne Clausen and where does he stand with Troy Clausen. *Jaques says Clausen claims he’s changed, I’ll guess we’ll see

M6: Jaques def. Chris Johnson & Champagne Clausen in a three way dance Jaques pins Johnson

Troy Clausen and Joel Gertner come out clapping his hands. Jaques that was an impressive victory. What everyone here didn’t realize is what you guys just watched was a number #1 contenders match for the heavyweight title. Congrats Jaques *Clausen winks* Jaques nods unaware if he should believe Troy or not

*Backstage: Clausen walking back behind the curtain to a sweaty Slayer and Marc Snow in his hippie tye die referee shirt. What the fuck was that Clausen? Troy: What? Slayer: So Jaques beat your rookie son and that human scum Chris Johnson and he’s in the damn title chase Troy: Yeah, do you watch the show, thats what I just said. and I’m the boss and well your not. *Marc Snow grabs Gertner’s neck brace tightly choking him *Slayer gets up in Troy Clausen’s face Slayer: I don’t care if your the damn second coming. I want my title. I wanna know why I made the previous world champion. Tap out, TWICE. and I’M not the #1 contender Clausen: Fine, Slayer you are now the #2 contender. Happy? Now if you don’t mind. I’d suggest Colgate, Crest maybe. Clausen walks away Joel Gertner holding his throat coughing

*The Truth Infantry backstage are talking to referee Danny Coleman. Ollafub is up front showing him some papers backstage. Blackman and Croyle shew away our cameraman recording their locker room

In ring: Romeo Roselli: this is the heavens crown championship. Last Sunday at Heatwave I announced that I will be holding the 7 minutes in Heaven Challenge so who wants to be the lucky first challenger

*A camera man gives his camera to another staff member and takes off all his wires and hops in the ring, telling Romeo to bring it *Crowd is really into it* Romeo looking around confused. Are you a camera man? You want to be the first challenger? What is your name: My name is GG and I’ve been a camera man for XPW since this company started

M7: Romeo Roselli def. GG after the seven minute time limit expires but GG was actually in control of the match at the end of the time limit. Crowd chants GG! GG! GG!

Romeo attacks him with a fluorescent light tube in the crowd and scars his head in the audience stands Romeo: you will not embarrass me (Romeo throws GG into a trash can and pushes it down the stadium stairs Romeo: you will not make a mockery of me

(Romeo grabs his title and walks to the back)

Video Package: Joe Gacy & Kirby Lee Covington (small boy on a playground swinging on swing set) We are a disease Plagueground is coming

M8: The Truth Infantry w/ Olaffub def. TakaNaka, Rey Mysterio, Pac, and Ruckus

high spot of the match takes place when Rey Mysterio pins Croyle for a 3 count, Ruckus pins Blackman for a 3 and Taka pins Edwards for a 3 and Danny just gives them a weird look (commentary is confused, the crowd is confused chanting you fucked up, bullshit)

eventually Troy Clausen and Joel Gertner run on down, Troy calls for Danny. Olaffub eavesdrops over smiling. Danny audibly says “I’m just doing my job, doing what I’m told”. The match still awkwrdly going on at this point. Blackman rolls up Tanaka and Danny counts the 1-2-3 Clausen is like what now that 3 count applies *bell rings and your winner: The Truth Infantry (crowd is confused) Truth Infantry powders up the ramp with Olaffub jumping up and down for joy, so much in fact his pony tail comes undone. Troy: Referee Danny Coleman should not be judged for his officiating. Unlike Mick Foley he’s not a biased ref. You see this is the reaction we all wanted. I thought maybe Heatwave would be when the world would find out The Truth!!! Clausen and the opponents in the ring stare intently Olaffub: When XPWEW reformed. I went through these re-sign contracts of all my clients in deep deep detail. I noticed so many loose loop holes here and I made a few minor changes. I thought you were a legal Troy Clausen, I guess not haha I read the trades :) I adjusted the contracts of Blackman, Croyle and Eddie Edwards. That’s right I skewed just one little thing. These contracts were so loose honestly it may have took….5 minutes hahahaha (Infantry laughs in unison) My clients don’t apply to the referees count of 3. In the contracts of my clients. It says clearly and Troy you signed off on all of these. Hell, I don’t even think you read them. I probably could have gotten away with putting a little more zeros on the salaries. Honestly. Troy you are a joke. A negotiating failure. A jagaloon of jargon. Troy my clients must be pinned to the count of 5. to be beaten in that ring. and now these contracts are water tight. And if you were so clevar to just I don’t know fire us on the spot. Good luck, I’ll see you in court if you try because these contracts not only oblige my clients to be beaten with the count of 5. These are guaranteed iron clad contracts. Sealed. You and everyone have made fun of my client Steve Blackman, calling him a thing of the past, a shell of himself. Steve Blackman is more intense with age. More focused and the same applies for Edwards and Croyle as well. My men are focused and now they have the ultimate edge and you or anyone in the back can’t do a damn thing about it. We are here to capture all the gold, and were out for destruction. What Edwards did to Robbie Williams was only the prologue to the story that is THE TRUTH!!! Thnank you Thank you!

[dylanissicc]

XPWEW All or Nothing 2019

⚡️XPWEW All or Nothing 2019

Hammerstein Ballroom

New York, NY

July 28th, 2019

Commentary: Joey Styles and Kandi Khaos

Opening Video Package:

Song: Nothing to You by Twiztid

Showcases the feuds of Priscilla, Regina Clausen, Troy Clausen and Audrey Carbine then Slayer vs Moxley then the Case Your Luck match then Edwards vs Awesome

Will Olaffub gets his own entrance to no music and a chorus of cheers which is completely bizarro. But that’s the Hammerstein Ballroom for you!

Eddie Edwards enters first as the challenger to a big reaction. A “Fuck him up Eddie fuck em up *clap clap*” chants that resonates throughout the Ballroom. Edwards salacious smile as he feels he has home turf. Edwards even starts jaw jacking with Casey Alfonso sitting in the front row.

Jake Awesome enters to a mixed reaction. Chants of “Fuck Jake Awesome” clashing with “Awesome Sucks”

Awesome even stops halfway down the aisle way to notice a fan in full on Captain Falcon gear

Quote: Joey Styles “I’ve had the pleasure to call every single Jake Awesome World Title match and tonight something feels at jeopardy”

M1: XPWEW World Heavyweight Title

Sixty Minute Ironman Match

Jake Awesome (c) vs Eddie Edwards

Creative chants throughout this match go:

* Captain Falcon clap clap clap clap

* Fuck him Eddy fuck him up

* Fuck Jake Awesome

* Awesome Sucks

* We Love Olaffub clap clap clap

* Chris Benoit chant

* They start doing Nakamura’s theme song chant for some reason

* Yes there will be beach balls

After 27 minutes of action Awesome gets his Awesome Bomb countered as Edwards absorbs the impact and rolls hum into a crossface and Awesome taps out

Edwards is up 1-0 with 33 minutes to go

About 8 minutes later Awesome connects a big splash for the top and a slow pinfall gets him the 1-2-3

It’s now tied 1-1 with 25 minutes left

19 minutes pass without a fall and Edwards starts to show his desperation and tells Olaffub to hit awesome with a weapon, it’ll get him disqualified and cost him a point but maybe he can catch up and make it even before time expires. Will Olaffub hits Awesome with a steel chair and it doesn’t even phase Awesome and the ref awards a point to Jake for that DQ making it 2-1 Jake up; Casey Alfonso gets fed up with Ollafub’s subtle remarks to him at ringside the whole night and he jumps the rail and tackles Ollafub and starts to wail on him and Jake pulls him off but the ref deducts a point from Jake as a DQ making it 1-1 now after all that about 5 minutes remain. Edwards starts to get some chain Olympic style wrestling on Jake to make the time expire but Jake starts to outwrestle him quite a bit and somehow Edwards locks in the crossface with about 2:35 left. Awesome powers out and lifts up to his feet meanwhile Edwards still has his crossface haphazardly allpied Jake drops him outside onto the thin mat outside the ring. Jake goes to the ropes, Suicide Dive connects and Jake rolls Edwards in the ring Edwards seems done, Jake covers 1-2 KICKOUT! 40 seconds remain and Jake hits a quick awesome bomb and this time that’s enough for the 1-2-3. Jake then dumps Edwards out to the outside of the ring landing on the exposed concrete and Edwards can’t get up as 19 seconds slowly expire. Awesome wins 2-1 and still the XPWEW World Heavyweight Champion

Winner: Jake Awesome 2-1

Awesome celebrates and begins a proper Hey Hey Hey Nah Nah Nah Nah goodbye chant. Edwards scowls at Jake and walks off with the crowd hitting him with that chant. The crowd play made this seemingly long match a lot more enjoyable. Well paced

Promo: Heatwave 2019 commercial

Song: Born to raise Hell by Crazy Town

Charlotte North Carolina

Sunday August 18th, 2019

Doxy Deity and Toni Storm enter followed by Amy Lee then Kiera Hogan with Rosemary. Enter Genevalisse who enters the ring to big fanfare now makes her debut! Based Fabian even introduces her himself

M2: 6 Woman Tag Elimination Match

Amy Lee, Rosemary & Kiera Hogan

vs

Doxy Deity, Toni Storm & Genevalisse

* Doxy, Toni and Genevalisse triple pin Amy Lee

* Rosemary eliminates Toni Storm

* Kiera Hogan rolls up Doxy Deity (her first pinfall victory in XPWEW finally)

* Genevalisse superkicks Rosemary and pins her

Now it’s down to Kiera Hogan and her long time Major League Wrestling rival opponent formerly known as Ivelisse going at it 1 on 1

* Genevalisse defeats Kiera and wins it for her team

Genevalisse, Toni and Doxy defeat Amy, Rosemary and Kiera Hogan. Kiera Hogan’s losing skid is over her and Rosemary jump for joy and even Based Fabian with his Juniorweight title comes out and puts it around the waist of Genevalisse congratulating her on her debut victory

Nick Simmonds Interviews the All Man; All Man asks where the fuck is Dr. Cube he’s running around in the shadow realm with the XPWEW No Limits Title But who cares I’m focused on tonight. My night. My show. Do you like the stage setup? I have a chance tonight. A chance albeit a chance split up between 8 people so that gives me realistically what a 12 and a half percent chance of victory tonight? Those odds aren’t great but I always have a plan A, Plan B even C.

Best 2 out of 3 Falls

M3: Champagne Clausen defeats GG with no help from the Freight Train which was a huge criticism from General Manager Romeo Roselli. Curt wins both falls in the contest 2-0 over GG! Curt Clausen is now 6-0! Troy Clausen comes in the ring and even says 6-0! 6-0! 6-0! Freight Train comes out and nervously asks for the mic, Troy graciously gives him the mic, sure Freight Train you are apart of the family. What did you want to say? Freight Train: since,,since he won the match two times I think that makes him Seven and Zero! Troy laughs! Yes! Yes! Yes! Seven and O!!!!!

Post Match Interview Champagne Clausen pops a bottle of Champagne and says his little sister Regina Clausen is going to become the women’s champ tonight!

M4: Chris Johnson defeats Dragon Kid and he’s now the #1 contender for the XPWEW Juniorweight Title (current champion Based Fabian)

Interview: Nick Simmonds is joined by Slayer. Slayer says this match is over a decade in the making. I’ve been wanting to see the myth that is John Moxley in that ring for so long. I knew one day he was gonna be in my ring. Now I’m gonna make him tap. And I will walk out of the Hammerstein Ballroom this infamous and beautiful venue with the IWGP United States Title in my hands

M5: XPWEW Tag Team Championships

Ruckus & Lexoni defeat Vinny Testaverde & Rondo in a bloodbath. Easily one of the best matches for Free Agency as a team.

nZo blood smeared in his face tried to talk but this Hammerstein Ballroom crowd can’t let him get a word in without some creative chants; “you may have won the battle but you smucks have not won the war”. Ruckus and Lexoni laugh it off holding their titles in the air!

M6: XPWEW World Women’s Championship

3 Way Dance

Priscilla Kelly retains the title defeating Regina Clausen and Audrey Carbine

Closing sequence Priscilla Kelly puts her tampon in Regina’s mouth causing Regina to forfeit. Curt Clausen tries to interfere and Audrey applies the art of ballistics on him and while she’s got the armbar applies Priscilla comes off the top rope with a steel chair straight to the face. Stuns her! Priscilla pins Audrey 1-2-3 for the win! The crowd goes insane! Priscilla is really over here!

Backstage: Troy Clausen is banging on the door of General Manager Romeo Roselli! Where in the god damn articles of confederation does it say anywhere that a medical, rag, sheep wool, sanitary Tampax pad can be used as a weapon. I know the books in here this used to be my filing cabinet you know that, and you probably moved all my shit around. Romeo listen Troy, were XPWEW. Fans can bring the weapons here ok there are no rules. A tampon while albeit disgusting and disturbingly unique is all fair. Troy: Oh fair? You know what’s not fair. This crowd. This sea of human waste throwing their garbage at my son and daughter. Think about that Romeo, human garbage flushing garbage at athletic royalty because of what? Jealousy. Is that fair? Is it fair that a jagaloon like Audrey Carbine thinks it’s fair to attack my son, who wasn’t even involved in the match. I’m sick of it. My daughter probably has HIV. And we’re gonna get here tested. Better than that we’re gonna test. Priscilla Kelly. And knowing your lifestyle Romeo you should consider a check up yourself. I’ll be back on Friday with a test and we’re gonna make some changes around here.

M7: Unsanctioned Match

IWGP United States Championship

Slayer vs Jon Moxley

Closing sequence: Jon Moxley has concocted this board taped with thornbushes and Mox Drops Slayer onto it from atop the ladder for the 1-2- kickout Slayer applies the helmed sharpshooter from the dead essentially and Moxley taps out

AND NEWWWWWWWW IWGP UNITED STATES CHAMPION THE DRAGONSLAYER. Moxley picks him up after and they both praise the audience!

M8: Case Your Luck Ladder Match

Golden Bryce vs Leonard McGraw vs Brodie Croyle vs 3M Ultra vs All Man vs Joe Gacy vs Based Fabian vs Jaques Dudley

Best High spots: Leonard McGraw lariat mid air off one ladder to a hanging 3M Ultra

Jaques and 3M hit side by side 630 splash off ladders onto Croyle and Joe Gacy But they both move out the way

Jocelyn Washington jumps the rail and tries to wake up Golden Bryce and Brodie Croyle grabs her and hits her with the Silent Echo and crowd pops huge. Croyle scales the ladder, Leonard McGraw tips the ladder slowly backward and Croyle does a sick no look bump falling onto A table. Unbelievable spot!!!! Leonard McGraw goes to climb the ladder (Dragon Kid and Ms. Ryu cheering him on, he hesitates to climb and Dragon Kid gives him the mask and he puts it on but that might of spent too much time because when he grabs the case up top he’s hit by some powder - like substance by this bust blonde woman wearing a milk man? I guess milk woman suit. The powder was a little distracting but then she pulls a flourscent light tube out of a belt holster and nails McGraw across the back. McGraw drops like a sack of potatoes and All Man in a raven taunt slump in the corner gets lifted up by this female and hoists him on the ladder, All Man regains consciousness enough to speed up the ladder and he unlocks the hook and wins the case Your Luck Ladder match! All Man is Mr. Case Your Luck

Winner: All Man thanks to a busty blonde female in a milk woman outfit. Who turns out to be Emma from WWE under a new name

After the match: Crowd is boo-ing throwing garbage and trash and this female grabs the mic and excitedly announces herself as Emma, Tenille Dashwood she is the ALL WOMAN!!

All Man and All Woman Walk up the ramp with smiles on their faces and they look at the entrance setup with basically a tribute to the All Man and they give each other this look and go to the right side and pull down a curtain to reveal a giant poster of All Woman as well. Great moment. What a debut. Show Ends