#Would you believe me if I told you this isn’t actually my 10th anniversary celebration of blutrunst.

[doyouknowhowtowaltz]

And here it is! It’s my first time ever making something of this type, I’ve made some very simple animations in the past but this was a whole different kettle of fish. I had a good time, pushed the limits of my poorly chosen editing software as hard as I could and took a great deal of creative liberty along the way.

@incurablenecromantic’s Blutrunst is utterly spectacular, and creeping up on its tenth birthday, and what a wonderful decade it’s been. I hope you all enjoy my tribute to this very special work.

And if you haven’t read the eponymous fic please indulge yourself in a lovely cannibal romance:

[iloveitwhen]

You want angst i have arrived!!!

Please can Adrian find a lost child turms out the child belongs Damien and mari extra salt if the child looks more like mari

So like Adrien doesn't find Marinette's lost child.... I totally forgot about that part of the ask....😭😭 Sorryyyyyy, i hope you still like it!

10 years ago

“I’m fine,” he snaps, “stop dotting on me, what are you, my mother?” He turns and storms away instantly regretting his words but not as strongly as he was annoyed by hers. 

“I don’t understand,” Marinette says so softly that Adrien slows to a stop. “Why are you acting like this?” Marinette walks around to face him, trying to catch his eye. “I mean I thought we were happy, I thought you were happy?”

Adrien can’t look her in the eye, he can’t tell her he only started dating her to get over Ladybug, which had been failing miserably for months. At first he was happy, well she mostly just made him feel not so alone and that was everything he could have asked for, until he realized that that wasn’t enough, it wasn’t love, only comfort. Isn’t love supposed to hit you like a ton of bricks? Isn’t it supposed to take your breath away? Make you feel an abundance of emotions like nothing else ever could? Ladybug took his breath away, made him feel things, and Marinette? She was just a placeholder, he was trying to shove her in the hole that Ladybug had left in his heart, but she didn’t fit. 

“Look at me.” Marinette doesn’t sound angry, just sad, defeated. 

“I don’t think this is going to work,” he blurts, finally looking into Marinette’s eyes just in time to see her breath catch, her hand to fly to her mouth in shock, and her eyes water. Just in time to see her break. 

“What?” she chokes out, “why?” 

He shook his head, he knew even before they started dating it wouldn’t work but he “tried” anyways for Marinette’s sake, even though the object of his affection was really Ladybug. And of course he knew it was bad to flirt with another woman while he was dating Marinette but it wasn’t like it was hurting anyone. Besides, if he actually was able to pull Ladybug then it wouldn’t really matter in the end, sure Marinette would be a little hurt and he’d feel bad about it but it never would have worked out between them anyways.

“I’m in love with somebody else.” Adrien may not be the best person in the world but he at least can be honest, he really does appreciate Marinette, but the longer he stayed with her the more she reminded him of Ladybug, only driving the stake deeper in his heart that he wasn’t with her, only Marinette. 

“Who?” she demands. 

Adrien laughs, even he could hear the arrogance in the sound. “Why? What are you going to do, attack her?” For a moment she looks shocked but it quickly morphs to anger. 

“I would like to know, Agreste, because I think I deserve it after all this time we’ve been together. I can’t believe that you’d really think that I’d-”

“It’s Ladybug,” he cuts off her inevitable rant but immediately regrets it. 

“What?” 

“I’m in love with Ladybug.” No turning back now.

“Adrien, you don’t know Ladybug, how the fu** are you in love with her?”

“We used to meet up,” well it’s not necessarily a lie, “she would always be there for me, she made me feel special, like I was her favorite civilian. We would have long talks about everything and nothing,” that’s how it used to be anyways. 

“You’re lying.” Marinette is no longer crying but her eyes are red and she looks. so. angry. 

Adrien shakes his head even though he is partly lying, “I’m not, but she told me how she was in love with Chat Noir,” oh how he wished that were true, “so I pushed myself away, but clearly it didn’t work. I’m still in love with-”

“Stop. Just stop.” This time Marinette cut him off. Looking up from the ground Adrien sees an expression he’s never seen on her face. Disappointment, contempt, just like the way his father looks at him. “I can’t believe this,” she laughs, empty of any humour, and shakes her head. Heading back over to the table she left her things at, she continues to laugh while repeating, “I can’t believe this.” Swinging her purse around her shoulder she grabs her keys and turns back to him. “This whole time. I can’t believe I've never seen it before now. I was so blind. So blind.” 

“So you believe me?” Adrien knows it’s not really important but she was acting weird, crazy even. 

“Do I believe that you’re in love with Ladybug. No. No, I don’t think you’re in love with her, I think you’re obsessed with her. I think you need therapy. I think you need to take a look at yourself and realize that love goes both ways, Adrien. Ladybug doesn’t love you back, never has, and never will.” Anger swelled in his chest but she yanks the door open and looks back one last time, “I can’t believe I gave my heart to a psychopath. You know, I really hope you get over her, Adrien. Because she will never. Ever. have you and you will never be happy with anyone else.” She scoffs and rolls still red eyes, “turns out I was blinded by you like you were blinded by her,” she says before stepping out and slamming the door shut. 

Marinette never looked at him the same way again, gone was the soft adoration in her eyes and replaced with disgust and anger and disappointment, much like the way Ladybug did, if only she could get over her unnecessary negative feelings over him and love him as he loved her. 

--- 

It was amazing how lonely one person could be, Adrien had only returned to Paris for the 10th anniversary of Hawkmoth’s defeat and it was a bigger celebration than usual and festivities were already beginning; but Adrien only felt a gaping hole in his chest from the memories of broken relationships with friends, his only sense of family, and regret. He took in the decorations hanging above doors and the happy squeals of the children in the park. He sat on the end of a nearly empty bench, flashing the pregnant woman on the other end a quick, polite smile not bothering to really look at her, only to reassure that he only meant to sit and not have a conversation with a stranger. 

As he settled and saw all the happy families bustling about the familiar thought of being alone re-emerged, Adrien had simply accepted that he was built and born to be lonely and had accepted that a long long time ago. He accepted it the night Ladybug and Chat Noir defeated Hawkmoth and out of necessity he had revealed himself to the world to avoid suspicion of any involvement of his father’s crimes. Now he was invited every year to give a speech but every year he declined, holding out that Marinette would join him, would reveal to the world that she was Ladybug, but she had dropped any and all communication with him so he always said no. It was silly thinking back to that night, at first he was confused why Ladybug wasn’t surprised in the slightest when he revealed himself and, according to her, only by the goodness of her word revealed herself to him. Although he suspected it was more to watch him suffer than anything else. 

“Oof!” Adrien’s thoughts scatter when a little girl trips and falls right in front of him. 

“ARGHH I coming for youuuuu!” A man’s voice growls out in a playful manner and Adrien turns his head to look at the source of the sound, it’s a rather handsome man with green eyes that were striking against his dark skin. 

The little girl giggles profusely and scrambles up, quickly hiding behind the arm of the bench and using Adrien as a shield from what he assumed was her father. 

Adrien chuckled and glanced over at the girl, about to make a comment to her when his words died in his throat. The girl had a familiar splitting smile with twin pigtails and blue blue blue eyes. Save for the tan skin she was the spitting image of one Marinette Dupain-Cheng, of Ladybug. 

Adrien is staring at her and she notices and her brow furrows. 

“You’re not my mommy,” she says as if he had somehow replaced her or she was considering her mother really was him and had disguised herself somehow. 

A giggle sounds from the other side of the bench. Adrien whips his head to the woman to find her laughing into her hand. She looked different than he remembered but it was unmistakably Marinette, she had a bun atop her head with bangs that framed her face and a sundress with a very pregnant belly. 

“Marinette?”

A happy squeal right in his ear sounded, he flinched and looked over to see the man had snuck around the bench and scooped the girl up in his arms. “No! Papa put me down! Put me down!” she laughed, trying in vain to get out of his grasp while he placed obnoxiously loud kisses all over her face. The man turned to Adrien with a laugh and an easy smile on his lips. 

“Sorry about that-” recognition flitted across the man’s features as he cut himself off, his face falling to a sneer, as if Adrien was scum of the earth, as if the man could not think of a better pass time than to kill Adrien. It was a terrifying change of demeanor, Adrien desperately felt the need to get out of this man’s sight before he got murdered. 

“Damian,” Marinette’s melodic voice sliced through the tension but the man only walked towards her, not dropping his gaze from Adrien. 

Adrien tried to look anywhere else but unfortunately found that the mini-Marinette had developed the same look and was glaring at Adrien. 

Marinette had stood and placed a hand on the arm of the man to placate him before turning to Adrien with a small smile. 

“Hello, Adrien.” He had imagined this moment so many times. So many times. And this was never in any of his imaginations. Marinette with a family that wasn’t his. “It’s good to see you.”

“Really?” he blurted, he needed to know if it was true, had she really thought of him as much as he thought of her?

“Of course.” 

Of course. Of course. Of course. 

“This is husband, Damian-”

“Damian Wayne,” Damian shifted his daughter to his left hip and thrust his hand out. Adrien reached his hand out and the other man practically crushed his bones with an unnecessarily strong grip. 

“-and our daughter, Bridgette.” Adrien glanced at the girl to give her a polite smile but she was still glaring at him the same way her father was. It was quite unnerving. 

“She’s the spitting image of you,” he tries awkwardly. 

“And she’s got her father’s glare it seems,” she chuckles and Adrien tries to laugh along but it sounds much too forced. “I really do hope you’ve been doing well, Adrien. I know we didn’t leave on the best of terms but I hope you’ve been blessed with happiness as I have.” She contemplates him for a short moment. “We both deserve it after-” she waves her hand through the air gesturing towards the festivities, “-everything.” He knew she was referring to their time as Chat Noir and Ladybug but he only thought of how much he couldn’t have happiness after all the things that happened in his life outside the suit. “We have to get going but it was nice to see you.” She sends him one last smile and turns away, easily slipping into her husband’s side, who was Damian freaking Wayne, CEO of a multi-billion dollar company, and walks away. Again.

Adrien could never compare, and he knew it. 

He lamely calls out, “It was good to see you too,” before collapsing back onto the bench and takimg a deep shuddering breath. 

Ok i know he didn't find a lost child but I don't want to rewrite it😭😭 I hope it still checks the rest of the boxes!

[ayayayayouch]

The One That Got Away (Youngk AU)

All this money can't buy me a time machine, no Can't replace you with a million rings, no I should have told you what you meant to me Cause now I pay the price

Stella became anxious when she read her invitation for their 10th anniversary college batch reunion. She debated whether she’d attend or flake out. Flaking out was easy, she thought. All she had to do was inform them she forgot to book a flight because of her busy schedule, being 14,846 km away from her home country, she thought it would be a cinch and her batch mates would understand everything. But she soon found herself buying a plane ticket 365 days before their reunion and online shopping for a gown later that day when she received the letter.

So, here she was, wearing a sequined midnight blue long-sleeved formal gown for their masquerade themed college reunion. She was greeted by their batch president, Victoria. “Stella!! You’re so early! We’re still finishing things up. Um, I mean, I guess you can help us?” She paused. “On second thought, you can uhm… roam around? Sorry, I have to take this.” She said as she pointed on her ringing cell phone. “Hello? Yes, this is she…” Victoria walked away, leaving Stella awkwardly standing near a group of people setting up the table.

What exactly is the purpose of reunions, anyway? So that everyone can judge what happened to them ten years after; or is it to see who became successful and pity those who didn’t? She found herself in a silly situation. She couldn’t believe she flew all the way back here for this because she perceived her first half  in college as so-so. She sort of felt like an outcast who was barely holding on to a degree she didn’t even like. But that was before she accidentally stumbled upon one of her classmates studying at the botanical garden near their department because Odette, her best friend, was busy and couldn’t accompany her. Brian Kang was one of the top students in their class and became Stella’s closest friend ever since that day. 

One fine Thursday afternoon in their sophomore year, she found herself telling Brian that she wanted to shift majors but was afraid because her parents might think she would be a disappointment.

“You know what, you have this one life. I say go for it.” Brian smiled at her. “If being a fashion designer is what makes you happy, go for it. My dad always reminds me that if it makes you happy and you won’t hurt anyone with your decision then it’s not a disappointment. Maybe compromise with your parents, though? Find a way where you guys will meet in the middle.” After that day, she’d always share what’s been bothering her and he always listen - no matter how trivial that may be. He’d always support her even after she decided to shift majors. She remembered how he used to cheer her on the first semester of her fashion design course until the last. As cliche as it may sound, Brian Kang was the reason she pushed through and persevered in her studies. He was the reason why her heart was overjoyed. Brian Kang was the reason for her smile. 

Everyone has a reason why they want to attend class reunions and for Stella, it’s the one who got away — Brian Kang.

When nostalgia had hit Stella, she decided to visit the botanical garden and searched for the vandalism she wrote on one of the tables: Stella will be a fashion designer— a way of manifesting her dream, as Brian playfully remarked. She smiled while tracing the letters, remembering all her hardships and Brian’s words of wisdom whenever she wanted to give up.

“Is the seat next to you taken?” A familiar voice greeted her.

“Bri!! You’re here!!!” She answered. “Duh! It’s not. Come!!” She patted the seat next to her.

“Long time no see.” Brian said as he sat next to her. “I heard you have a bridal shop in Florida now.”

“Wow, so you get updates about me while I get none about yours? Why haven’t you been replying to my messages in Facestagram?!” She playfully hit him. “You stopped replying back in 2011, a few months after graduation!” She shook her head. “What happened to always updating one another huh? You haven’t been posting on Facestagram either! Any update will do, you know!”

“I’m sorry!” He half-smiled. “It’s just… I was busy and all… but hey, I’m very proud of you… I’m glad you didn't give up… I’m happy you’re happy…”

“I’m thankful you were always there to listen. If I haven’t met you, I wouldn’t have the courage to shift majors. Odette was always busy with her boyfriend so I am really grateful I saw you here studying back then. I owe everything to you. This is completely random but I’m nervous... I mean… I shifted majors and I’m still invited to this reunion… what would others think? How would I even respond to their questions?” She rambled on. “Hey, you got something on your hair…”

“I got it.” Brian stopped her from reaching the leaf resting on his hair. “Don’t think of what others will say. Also, you’re still part of our section. Don’t worry, I saw Cassie here… she shifted majors too, remember? We’re one big happy family here. Odette is actually excited to catch up with you…. I ugh… I uhm.. talked to her earlier. Also…she’s not a bad friend, okay? Remember that.”

“Oh, really?? You’re in touch with Odette but not with me? Ouch.” Stella joked. “Brian…” she felt her heart beat faster and faster. “I have something to tell you.” This is it, she thought, a long overdue love confession.

“Is this thing on? Oh okay!! In a few minutes, our celebration will begin. I encourage everyone to please find their seats.” Victoria announced on the speaker. “Once again, the celebration will begin shortly, please find your seats as soon as possible. Thank you!”

“We should get going now.” Brian said. “Let’s talk... later.....” He smiled weakly.

“We can… walk together?” She asked.

“I… I forgot something in my car.. you can go ahead…” 

“I can wait for you… if you want?”

“No, no… it’s fine.. you can go ahead, really… it’s all good.” Brian insisted. 

“Are you sure?” Brian nodded yes. He watched her stand up and walk away.

When Stella looked back, she didn't see Brian following after her. Did he went the other way, she wondered. "Bri? Are you still there?" She can't quite clearly see any movement because the botanical garden was dimly lit. "Bri??" When she didn't hear a response, she continued walking away.

“There you are!!” Odette greeted Stella outside the botanical garden. “Your seat is next to mine, let’s go.” She dragged her friend and went to their seats. "We've got a lot of things to catch up on."

“How have you been?” Odette asked Stella as they sat comfortably. “Okay.. so... before everything else.. I… I… Bri… Brian wanted me to give this to you.” She handed her a folded paper. “That day was the last time I talked to him too.” She saw Odette holding back her tears.

Stella opened the letter and smiled. I guess it’s not too late, she thought, tracing the letters on the note that said those three words she wanted to say earlier: I love you. However, the year on the letter confused her. The letter dates back to May 14th, 2011 and, if her memory was right, Brian said he talked to Odette earlier. Stella furrowed her eyebrows. “Brian’s at the parki—“

She was cut off by Victoria. “Before we begin, let us remember our batch mates who are no longer here with us.” A melancholy tune started playing and the first picture Stella saw on the screen was Brian’s.

“What? How? When?” At that moment, everything made sense. Brian not posting on his Facestagram. Him not replying to her messages. “Odette?” Stella looked at her. “Why didn’t you—“

“I didn’t have the courage to break the news to you…. I’m so sorry… I’m a bad friend…” Odette was trying hard not to cry. “It’s just that you said you were having a hard time adjusting in Florida that time.. I was trying to find the perfect timing but days gone by and it became years and... and... I’m so sorry...”

Brian reminding her that Odette isn’t a bad friend echoed in Stella’s mind. “No… no.. you’re not a bad friend… Brian would have agreed about it too… it’s okay…” A tear rolled down on her face. “It’s okay.”

Maybe in another life, where everything aligned, Stella would be his girl and they would keep all their promises— them against the world. Maybe in another life, she wouldn’t have to say he was the one that got away.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #237

just a warning beforehand this survey has some probably tmi stuff.

Which is better: good 'ole southern food or sea food? Despite coming from and still living in, I legitimately enjoy almost NO southern food. Absolute garbage. I don't enjoy much sea food either though, save for shrimp, so I guess that. Have you ever had a very strong spiritual experience? I dunno. What do you think you want to major in at college? I'm an Art & Design major right now. Minor in? English is my minor currently. What song do you have on repeat lately? Quite a lot, actually. What’s something important you could be doing now? I could be working on finishing the draft to my Writing paper and this week's Art History chapter, but... yeah. I procrastinate all to hell, but I "justify" it with me having SO much extra time in the library while Mom takes her classes that I have a great deal of time to just do everything in there. How do you feel about Circuit City going out of business? I have zero clue what that is. About how often do you go on cleaning sprees? LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL what're those? What’s the best story you’ve gone over in an English class? The Outsiders. Is your house haunted? Don't think so. What kind of tissues do you prefer? At least thicker as a single sheet of wet paper and soft. But ultimately it's nota a big deal. What face wash do you use? I prefer the Biore charcoal scrub, but I've been out of that for like... ever, and it's pricey, so we haven't bought any more. So now I use this peach scrub stuff Mom gets. I don't like it much because it's kinda abrasive, so probably bad for my skin, but it at least makes it feel cleaner. Do you reject Satan? I don't even know if a head demonic entity exists. Got no opinion on him. Are you violent? Far from it. Do you use google search or yahoo? Google. Was your step mother terrible? Her political views are fucking trash, but she herself is a wonderful person. Do you know anyone who doesn’t care about anything but themselves? HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Are you single? If no who are you dating and for how long? I'm single for now. I don't believe prayer or "good vibes" have any power, but nevertheless, I almost DO pray Sara and I will come back together once she figures herself out and one of us is brave enough to move. Do you enjoy going for walks? Nowadays, no, but only because I'm still recovering from muscle atrophy in my legs, so it hurts quiiite a bit. But in a way, yes, I do enjoy walking as I know it's good for my legs, but it's still painful - but improving immensely. Before it started to get real bad, I fucking loved going on walks down the path by Sara's. When it wasn't cOLD AND WINDY AS A MOTHERFUCKER What are your favorite accessories? Do piercings count? If yes, totally those. And spiked chokers are fucking hot. I'll wear mine again someday, just fkn watch me. Do you wear makeup on a regular basics? Not at all. I am asking for *genuinely* black eye shadow and also quality black lipstick for Christmas, though, for when I do wear makeup. Ours suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. When was the last time you really established your favorite TV show? Oh, idk. It's been years. Write one lyric that really explains the way your life is going as of now? HAHA I'm actually listening to NSP's "Danny Don't You Know" right now and if "you're just going through an awkward phase from 12 to 29" aIN'T ME- Do you ever have any fantasies that involve certain celebrities? Who? Yes. Take an. idk. Wild guess. You can read like one or two of my surveys and already be absolutely sure lmao What is your favorite brand of shoe? Where can you buy these shoes? Converse, and... multiple places?? Does anyone ever judge you for something you naturally cannot help? Oh, I'm sure. Do you support homosexuality in general? Why do you or why don't you? Of fucking course I do. It's natural, and especially after realizing I was bi and experiencing a genuinely loving female-female relationship, I've only grown more ferocious in standing for gay rights. Fuckin try to tell me I can't love her without some sky demon firing me into Hell for it. I'll bring sunscreen. If you had your own personal dance crew, what would you name it and why? I dunno??? Has anyone ever called you an exact replica of one of your parents? Agree? No. Have you ever claimed to be in love when you knew you really weren’t? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I don't joke around with that shit. If you had the chance to meet an annoying celebrity, would you still do it? No?????? Why would I want that??????????? Do you ever lie in the grass during summer or are you afraid of ticks? 1.) That sounds boring and too hot and 2.) I'm fucking terrified of all parasites, so ticks are zero exception. Does it bother you when you see slutty girls getting all the cute guys? *chaotic eye twitching* In winter, would you rather wear jacket or hoodies? Why is this? HOODIES! Mega cozy. Would you consider yourself a good singer or are you tone deaf? Depends on the song, but generally, I don't think I'm real good. My voice isn't stable. Do you think regrets are better left unspoken or should they be out loud? Y'know, a real good question for once. I think maybe... it depends, I guess? Some things are just better unsaid, sometimes vice-versa. I suppose it depends on who you're telling, too. What color is your remote? Does it have any special/interesting features? Uh I know it's black, but that's it. I never use the TV. Name a time when you cried the most: The night of the breakup when Mom drove out to get me (I was walking to his house to talk bc she wouldn't take me), and she had to physically hold me down when we got in the house because I dashed and she knew I was about to do something stupid. I just fucking collapsed. That night is so blurry, but I'll never forget the crying. Fucking NOBODY deserves to go through that goddamn night. What color is your keyboard? It's black, though the keys are rimmed with red light. Have you ever thought about suicide? Too many times. Please please please please seek help if you have even a moment's consideration about it. How do you feel about Obama? I don't know much about him politically, but he was funny as fuck, I do know that. Seems like a chill dude. What was the last lie you told? I dunno, something little. Name 3 things in your purse (or wallet): My Harley Quinn wallet, hand sanitizer, aaaaand my keys. What time does your favorite TV show come on? *shrug* Where is the scariest place you’ve ever been? I haven't been to many seriously "scary" places, honestly... so idk, really. Do you like string cheese? NO. What color was the coolest insect you’ve seen? No clue. Probably some butterfly or moth. Do you own any pink clothing? ... How do I not know this. How do you usually style your hair? It's directed to the right with no part through it and swoops over/close to my right eye. Do you use anything to whiten your teeth? I'm also asking for whitening strips for Christmas. .-. Ah, how gift desires change as you grow. I took awful care of my teeth during the worst of my depression, so yeah, I need them. I'm honestly stunned they're in a decent condition now. Have you ever collaborated with anyone on a project (not for school)? Hmm, don't believe so. What is (going to be) your career? I refuse to drop my career aspiration of a photographer. Not giving up on that no matter what. What is the difference between an alligator and a crocodile? Crocodiles' teeth protrude both upwards and downwards over their lips while alligators' only show downwards; crocs have a more tapering snout, alligators' are more rounded; and crocs are generally bigger. I didn't obsessively watch Animal Planet for nothing, y'all. :^) Were you breastfed as a baby? Yeah. That woman had five goddamn kids with no epidural or anything. She ain't afraid of no pain, and she's also like, MEGA into child health, safety, etc., and while formula-feeding is completely fine and valid, it's factual breast milk is a lot healthier for babies. What does your favorite shirt look like? Man, that's hard to pick. My most comfortable and well-fitting one is a Metallica "King Nothing"-inspired design, which is black and just has some gnarly skull designs 'n shit on it. HA HA WAIT, found it! This is it. Just a few days ago though, my mom's coworker went to the NSP 10th anniversary show in Chicago AND SHE GOT ME A FUCKING SHIRT BC SHE KNOWS I LOVE THEM AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH I SQUEALED SO LOUD AND SMILED MY FACE IN HALF. What is the cutest breed of puppy in your opinion? Do not EVEN with this, omfg I couldn't even try. What is the cutest baby animal in general? Have you, like, SEEN baby meerkats????????????? They're not the cutest for the first, like, two weeks (BUT still cute!!), but once they're outside the burrow? Jesus fuckin CHRIST they are the cutest creatures known to the galaxy and beyond. If we're talkin' like, cutest from birth, maybe cats. I adore kittens. Do you have some sort of odd fascination with anything? Perhaps my "strangest" is what's referred to as "vulture culture," which is essentially using naturally-deceased (usually wild) animals for art, such as those popular crystal-covered skulls, necklaces, creative use of wet specimens, stuff like that. I find some odd beauty and respect in creating art of the dead - it's like... making death beautiful and honoring the creature by immortalizing it in an art form. I personally photograph roadkill (that shit's confused the fuck outta drivers lmao) with the goal of forcing the brutality of it onto viewers and just make you think "okay yeah I need to drive more carefully." I don't know if that technically qualifies as vulture culture as I don't really... use the corpses, but nevertheless, I really enjoy doing it. I do kinda question the morality of it, like you can't ask an animal "hey do you wanna be art when ur dead?", so you're left to decide for it, but I think I lean ever so slightly more towards it being respectful, showing the beauty of its life. I WANT TO SAY HOWEVER, I DO FUCKING NOT support hunting trophies. I even question taxidermy outside of being from hunting considering you're not really making art, something new, some sort of message, out of it. There's no creative purpose other than to show "hey look at this dead animal!!", and besides that, it kinda creeps me out. Wow sorry for the ramble, I'm just into this stuff. Who was the last person to text you? Sara. What did they say? Paraphrased, that life has been a serious cunt to her lately. Which is true. have you ever broken someones heart? He fuckin acted like it after two goddamn weeks. I suppose maybe Jason, though I can't really tell you that since he fucked off after the breakup, so it's not like I was around him. I'll admit his health and general demeanor was withering as time led up to it (I knew something was wrong, he'd just never tell me), so he was obviously suffering. I feel awful for that shit, seeing I was apparently that goddamn stress-inducing. Had yours broken? LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO I think the whole Internet knows, oops. Do you consider past relationships a waste of time? No. Well, maybe just one. I kinda wanna say Tyler was, but then again, as I was healing, it showed exactly what I would not tolerate. So I guess it had a silver lining. Do you think you’ll be around to see the world end? I wanna say no, but I wouldn't be surprised. It's gonna be climate change (reason #1 for me), the super volcano finally blowing, or nuclear war. Scientifically, we are far, far, far from overdue for another mass extinction anyway. Do you believe in second chances? Yeah, sometimes. Depends. Do you swear? Way more than needed. Swearing a lot just became part of my normal vernacular through exposure to Jason and his family lmao. I was just about always there, and whew does his mom swear like a sailor. Italian New Yorker to the core. To me, "swear words" are just normal vocabulary. What is the nearest photo to you of? A family of meerkats on my wall. Are you good at being quiet? Sure? Who has your heart? I'm guessing you mean romantically? Two people are tearing at it, then. One that's fuckin stupid and needs to stop. Do you like it that way? No. No. Sara is, realistically, the best match for me and a very healthy partner for me. But now that for whatever goddamn reason Jason sneaked back into the picture (metaphorically; he hasn't reached out or anything), hints of obsession/addiction are coming back. I know it's fucking creepy, but I was legitimately obsessed with him. I sent him a perfectly polite and genuine email of ME apologizing to HIM, and I guess that just shot my feelings back up. God, typing this makes me realize to a fuller degree that this is an awful idea. Where is this person? Sara's probably at home; hell if I know where the other is. When was the last time you saw them? I saw Sara this past February. Jason, not since February of '17. Do you prefer desktops or laptops? Laptops because of portability. Sunrise, or sunset? I think maybe sunrise, considering the colors tend to be more pastel. But both are gorgeous. What kind of mood are you in? A confused as hell one. The Jason thing is driving me insane, and TMI WARNING I've been dealing with a fucking ginormous libido that I'm guessing sprouts from my new birth control, and it led me to doing to thing I said I'd never ever do because I only want to share that experience with my partner. Y'know, the "m" word. Saying it feels too weird and dirty. That's the problem: it's so instilled in my head that masturbation is lustful and just "wrong" that my brain is still trying to process that it's okay and natural and, as I found, relieving. I had to look it up and everything to convince my shameful ass I wasn't being "dirty." Hey, on that note: Planned Parenthood offers way goddamn more than abortion, friends. I swear it's beyond wild what I used to believe. But yeah ANYWAY, I'm just feeling weird and still kinda "tail between my legs" today. Do you like fans that blow directly on you or oscillate? Depends on how hot I am. What is one thing you worry about most in long-term goals? "not having enough money to get there.." <<<< YUP this. Right before you fall asleep, what is your usual position? It's hard to tell considering you're falling into unconsciousness... but I THINK on my left side, hugging an edge of the blanket to me. When you have sex, do you keep your eyes closed or open when finishing? I wouldn't know; I've only ever been on the brim before freaking out and we stopped because I was literally scared of how overwhelming the feeling was. That and my family was home and I was having trouble staying quiet lmao. When you have mail do you open the biggest one first, or doesn’t matter? Uhhhh. I honestly don't get mail enough to answer this. I'd probably go for the smallest? When you wake up what is the first thing you usually look for? My phone. Think of the last habit/addiction you quit. What replaced it? Hm. I really don't know. Your phone rings but you don’t know the number, would you answer it? No sir-ree. Do you always take a shower after you have sex? I didn't always back then. Do you let your girl/boyfriend drive, or do you prefer to? 1.) I don't drive and 2.) I'm single. The last time you had sex was it in the morning, afternoon or night? Hell if I remember.

[nikasen]

Hey! Say! JUMP IOth Anniversary Special Individual Interview - Okamoto Keito

It might not be 100% accurate and I still hope there will be someone who willing to sub the whole interview. Correction are most welcome :)

Interviewer: Please give a brief self-introduction.

Keito: I am Hey Say JUMP's Okamoto Keito. Thank you

Interviewer: Please have a seat

Keito: Thank you

Interviewer: Are you nervous? 

Keito: I am not (stammering)

Interviewer: Why don't you take a deep breath.

Keito: *take a deep breath* Keito: I'm fine now

Interview: Let's begin, would you tell us what motivated you to enter Johnny's?

Keito: Since I was a kid, I've always watching my dad's activity. It was quite a shining life but that time I couldn't tell my father that I wanted to enter Johnny's. I went to further my study abroad in England, and when I return back during summer vacation, it was my first time that I went to watch a different stage acting from my father. It was Takizawa's theater that time. There I saw people younger than me in Johnny's dancing, singing and working hard,  I thought I cannot let it just like this, so for the first time I told my dad, that I wanted to enter Johnny's.

Interviewer: So it has been 10 years since you enter Johnny's. What do you think the reason you were chosen to be in Hey Say JUMP? Please tell us based on your own thoughts. 

Keito: Probably because English...I didn't have any experienced in singing and dancing. Other than that, I wonder why would they choose me. Maybe because my experienced studying abroad and I can speak English..or perhaps it might be because I am my father's son..

Interview: You seems to dress modestly today, is it because of the interview?

Keito: Yes! 

Interviewer: And your hair is perfect

Keito: Actually for interview today I thought I would like to wear suits, but the shirt at my home is too wrinkle.

Interviewer: You tell us earlier that you study abroad in England, Were you feel uneasy when you were there? You went to an unknown country. 

Keito: I don't remember that much. But if I would talk about it, I went to an ordinary local school, there's no Japanese around and no one speaks Japanese there. For half year I have been quiet. I didn't know how I could survived. But I gain lots of experience. My host family when I first come there was from Russia, so everyone in the house always communicating in Russian, and I end up remebering Russian first instead of English. 

Interviewer: Even now you can still understand Russian?

Keito: Even now i still can..

Interview: So you can understand the conversation?

Keito: In conversation something like "Привет" it means "hello"...

Interview: You seems to be left behind for 6 months, so for 6 months how you catch up?

Keito: I started to frequently communicating and from there I started to be able to do conversation.

Interview: Have you ever had any dream where you spoke in English?

Keito: I had, I had. Even now I still experience it. There's a time I dream that the members talk to me in English.

Interviewer: After you become Hey Say JUMP, when is the moment that you think you were glad that you were able to speak in English?

Keito: There was once during our Asia Tour, when we had our live performance in Hong Kong and I was able to talk in English, and also during Johnny's world before. I'm happy that at the same time I can be the interpreter for the foreign fans who came. But what makes me glad the most is, the members are really rely on me when we travel overseas.

.

Interviewer: Since the past 10 years of debut, would you tell us things that you have done with your utmost effort and also the difficulties?

Keito: The thing that I have been working hard and also makes me happy which I have been talking about it recently is, I got the opportunity to composed H.our Time which was included in this year's Best Album. It truly makes me happy and I have been working very hard in order to produce it. I did composing before this but I hardly get any OK. So the timing in 10th years anniversary is...

Interviewer: Your dreams come true isn't?

Keito: Yes. However it was also difficult. The song making, is this the right answer? Is this exactly right? Will the member convinced? I had those kind of thoughts. It was also really difficult, to think whether the fan will be pleased with the melody line I created or whether our thoughts are properly delivered to them.

Interviewer: How do you feel, when Hour Time, the song that you made by yourself was performed at the concert for the first time? 

Keito: It was touching. I was really touched. I had number of nightmares, in my dream at night I often seen something like they won't let it included. Like every night. That's why I couldn't believe in myself until the day of Best Album was release. When the Best Album was released, there's no way I can hear review from the fans. So when the song was performed for the first time during our live, there are people who are earnestly listen and also there are people who cried, to be able to see the song I made...I was really touched. It makes me happy.

Interviewer: After this Hey Say JUMP will continue for 15th Anniversary or 20th Anniversary. As for Okamoto-san, in future what do you want Hey Say JUMP to be? What do you want to change?

Keito: Although I would like to say that I want Hey Say JUMP to a big group,  I feel like I want to say that, but I didn't think that we have gone that far yet. Perhaps now there are many people who have known Hey Say JUMP, and perhaps they also known me. Personally I want everyone to know more about Hey Say JUMP. So until I am able do it, it would be impossible for me to say what I want the group to be

Interviewer: Do have any works that you would like to try?

Keito: Since I can use English very well I hope I can interview foreigners, also I wanted try stage acting. Actually, I hardly seen my father's time as an idol. As I watching him doing stage acting, he used great energy, I also want to let out that kind of energy too, so since before I have always wanted to do stage acting. I also have other things that I would like to try too

Interviewer: If you didn't become Hey Say JUMP 10 years ago, what do you think you will be doing now?

Keito: What I would be doing now?

Interview: The 24 years old of you, what you would be doing now?

Keito: Probably I would work in agriculture sector in England

Interviewer: Agriculture?

Keito: The place that I have been before are mostly farms and there are lots of agriculture going on, if I have been staying and grow up there, it is likely I would be one.

Inteviewer: So do you have any question to ask us?

Keito: Question? is it fine to ask?

Interviewer: We will answered briefly.

Keito: What do you think that I am lacking off?

Interviewer: In order to show more Okamoto Keito side, you should put a little bit positiveness when you are inside the group. 

Keito: Thank you

Interviewer: Lastly, Hey Say JUMP will celebrates it's 11 years, please tell us your enthusiasm towards this year activity and also your last self promotion.

Keito: I think 11 years is quite a long time, it might not be good to say more about myself, I love the members and the members have a lot of good points, so I want more people around to know them. And personally, I do not want to waste any minutes or second of my life. There are many parts of me that are still lacking, so I will keep on learning, so that's how I'm going to spend rest of the years.

Keito: Thank you :D

[perfectirishgifts]

“We Are Uncomfortable Being Uncomfortable”: Grieving During Covid-19

New Post has been published on https://perfectirishgifts.com/we-are-uncomfortable-being-uncomfortable-grieving-during-covid-19/

“We Are Uncomfortable Being Uncomfortable”: Grieving During Covid-19

Grief, often labeled as a “bad feeling” that we try to hide, is really just another part of the … [] human experience.

One of the things you might have noticed about our coping with the pandemic has been the Instagram-ification of it all. Sugar coated images that say: “Let’s bake bread and find ways to make the pandemic cute” or “Look, I am on my Peloton, I am doing self-care so well” fill our social media feeds, as if Covid-19 did not just surpass heart disease as the number one killer of people in the United States. They do this, perhaps, because it is easier to do something and try to cope, then to worry or to grieve. In fact, if we stop and admit what this experience actually is for all of us, it might be too hard to say out loud or really, to feel.

Nora McInerny, author of It’s Okay to Laugh (Crying is Cool Too), creator of the Hot Young Widows Club, and host of the award-winning podcast “Terrible, Thanks for Asking,” explains, “Right away, everyone wanted [the pandemic] to be something that it wasn’t. My social media feed was like, ‘this is how we’re making it fun and cute for us’ and like, I’m sorry, do you think our grandparents were like, ‘this is how I’m making this depression, cute?’ No. They were like ‘we are in a depression we have not eaten, you know, for several days.’” She explains that she once complimented a photo of her grandmother and while her grandmother thanked her for what she said, she also acknowledged that she was skinny in the photo because they did not have food at the time. Nora adds, “Our grandparents weren’t trying to life hack their way through a depression like, ‘here’s how I make content’.”

But, as Americans during Covid-19, especially for those with privilege, there is a desire to experience only those emotions deemed acceptable and good. As Nora puts it, “It is very rare that someone’s like ‘I don’t like that lady, she’s too happy’…No, No, No. People are like ‘I don’t like that woman she’s sad, she’s angry, it’s like get over it.’ ”  Nora feels we, as a culture, have few acceptable emotions and grief isn’t one of them. We even like to pretend, as she points out highlighting our best selling book selections, that we can choose our attitudes and just “be happy.” She says, “It’s like, what if it were that easy?” We even try to look on the bright side of the more painful things in life like cancer diagnoses (Nora points to a book called Bright-Sided by Barbara Ehrenreich for more on this topic). News Flash: It doesn’t work.

Instead, Nora wonders what it would be like if we actually admitted the truth and said out loud that right now, during this pandemic, this is scary and no one knows what they are doing. We may all hate being uncomfortable, and feel like we should be using this time for some kind of self-growth, optimization, and even improvement, but, our actual goal, she says, is just to survive, and remain stable. She adds, however, that she does not want to negate people’s coping mechanisms, or judge them. She simply wants to highlight that while coping like this makes sense and she knows why people do it, it is often just a “a perpetual gaslight extravaganza.” She offers to remind people, “this does suck,” as often as they need it.

And, she is right, it does suck. Studies estimate that for every Covid-19 death, a person leaves behind 9 family members bereaved. This means about 2 million people in this country will be grieving in 2020 and this number will only grow. Dr. Shoshana Ungerleider, an internal medicine physician and the founder of End Well which is hosting a free, virtual event called Take 10 on December 10th featuring celebrities and everyday heroes on this very topic explains, “The pandemic has created a collective grief experience that we have not yet addressed as a nation (or as a world). I’m not sure we even have the right words to describe what it is that we’re going through. In order for us to move through this experience and find a place of healing, we need to address this, normalize the sadness and the pain that so many are feeling and create ways to support each other.” 

One way, of course, is to name it and say out loud what we are feeling and not sugar coat it at all. Another is to understand what grief is and when we are experiencing it, and then, normalize it and learn how to help someone through it. For additional information and for a community on these topics, you can also register for free for Take 10 and hear Nora, as well as Andy Cohen, Taraji P Henson, Blair Underwood, Maria Shriver, Soledad O’Brien, Justin Baldoni, Biden Covid-19 Advisory Board member, Dr. Atul Gawande and many others speak virtually on December 10th.

Grief Is Not Just Death

Nora McInerny is a reluctant grief expert who co-founded the Hot Young Widows Club, an online … [] support group for an endlessly growing group of people around the world who have lost, what she calls, their person.

Nora, who in 2014 lost her second baby to miscarriage, her father to cancer, and her husband, Aaron, to a brain tumor within six weeks, says that when she first felt grief herself, she assumed it was something else. She says, “You will assume that you are just ungrateful, you will assume that you are somehow defective, that you’re not grateful enough for what you do have, if you are somehow experiencing the loss of what you no longer have.” But, in a way, she notes, grief is really not something that you understand until it happens to you. Even then it makes people, including those you admire, become “a bunch of amateurs.” With grief, she explains, “We will all be absolutely new to it, every time we experience it.” 

This is especially true as you can grieve much more than death. Nora notes that she always believed that grief could only occur with death and didn’t extend much outside of the funeral, when she thought the emotion ceased to exist. When someone told her that she was grieving her husband’s brain cancer, she became angry. She felt like calling those experiences and feelings “grief,” somehow cancelled out all of the positive emotions she was still having with him while he was alive. She says, “It felt like grief was a huge blotter that just sort of, I don’t know, stamped out every other feeling, instead of something that coexists with every other part of your life. I was absolutely grieving when Aaron was diagnosed, was grieving for our entire marriage as I watched him, you know, suffer, and I watched him slip away, as I watched our friends and our family live the lives that we assumed that we would also get to live. That is also grief.” 

In the pandemic, loss of in-person school or graduation or other milestones like bat mitzvahs or weddings, can also be grief. Nora explains that with her four children (4, 7, 14, 19), they are all grieving different things, like the fact that they left school and didn’t return without warning. But, even if we want to draw comparisons between our situations or play “who has it worse,” there is no “worse” or “more important” grief. For example, you can grieve not returning to school and that doesn’t mean you are saying it is worse than her husband dying. Nora feels no good conversations include the words just, only, but, or should, and that you can feel anything about your own situation, without immediately comparing it to someone else’s.

She adds, “It is like the Grinchiness of American emotionlessness to say, well there’s just only so much sadness to go around and it got all sucked up, so there’s no sadness left for, you know, my seven year old who moved to a new city and doesn’t get to go to school and make friends. Yeah, there is. And if you imagine everybody is a seven year old, you wouldn’t do that. You wouldn’t do it to yourself [and] you wouldn’t do it to other people.” 

Grief Has No Right Way Or No Timeline

There is also not a right or wrong way to grieve and everyone experiences it differently. Nora highlights that this is true even if everyone is living through the same thing, like a global pandemic. When her husband died, she was grieving the way she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him in it, while his mom was grieving the loss of her only son, his sister, her only brother, and their son, his only biological father. She also didn’t realize she was lucky to have had a funeral or time at the bedside until Covid-19 made restrictions to the mourning process and she has heard what that has been like for people. She says, “I wanted to isolate and I did a pretty good job of it, but I did not appreciate how optional it was for me and for some people (whom she has met in her Covid-19 specific group in the Hot Young Widows Club) it is not optional and that is just absolutely wrenching.”

Grief also has no timeline. Just because you want to stop feeling sad or want your friend or family member to “move on” doesn’t mean they can or should. Dr. Ungerleider explains, “If we can get away from the idea that grief is a linear, step-wise process —we may better understand the fact we can’t speed it up and “get over” it quickly. Grief is often something that lives with us forever and ebbs and flows throughout life.” Nora tells a story of how someone in her Club wrote in a post, “When my son died, people said call at any time, I’m here for you, that was 7 months ago. I called 10 people tonight and it went to voicemail.” Nora points out that if people are fatigued of hearing about someone’s son dying after 7 months, that is heartbreaking as that is really no time at all.

In fact, she still grieves Aaron even though she is happily remarried and it was just his 6-year death anniversary. Still, she had to even remind her own family to reach out on the day of. She previously would have felt like they just didn’t care or she was messed up for not being “over it” by now, but, she now thinks differently. She also knows that people aren’t often malicious and they just assume that their experience of grief must be someone else’s. For example, her family had left her alone because they thought it would make her sad to talk about Aaron as it makes them sad to talk about their Dad. But, grief and how you want to cope with it just isn’t the same for everyone.

So, How Do We Help Each Other Grieve? 

It can be really hard to know what to say or how to say it when someone is suffering or grieving, especially a death. Dr. Ungerleider says that even though physical in person connection has been removed, we can “still show up for each other in other ways and listen and ‘be there’ for each other.” We may really want to fix everything, which Nora has seen too, but, Dr. Ungerleider points out that we need to get comfortable sitting with someone who is grieving and recognizing that we can’t solve their problem. Nora adds, “If you can say to your friend, ‘I don’t know what you need, but I’m going to be here. I’m going to mess up, [and] you can tell me to fuck off and it’s okay.” That is what can help someone through it. She adds, “empathy is just having a good imagination.”

Full coverage and live updates on the Coronavirus

From Healthcare in Perfectirishgifts

[kgxiangyu-blog]

ILL-FITTING

• • • MISSION OBJECTIVE_  ▭▭▭▭▭▭▭▭▭▭ 0% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 10TH

you are a vulture. the existance of corpses puts you into action. there’s no way to soften up this reality; it is what it is. you are a mere scavenger and today it rings truer than ever. 

MUMBAI INSTITUTIE

the name on your assignment file stare back at you. it’s 3 hours until the soonest flight out. you fill up your wait time by creating constellation between what seems like isolated stars.

mumbai institute → servers are down → within the same city as second site of explosion → one out of for attacked sites → kingsman related celebrations  ↓ three incidents establish a pattern. a fourth solidifies it. ↓ who would know the kingsman had an anniversary coming up? ↓ what are the servers hiding? ↓ who has a grudge with the kingsman?

you’re going unaccompanied this time. you specifically request one handler with tech background to be on standby with you. this situation isn’t something that an entire team is ready to be exposed to. the less that people know, the better.

• • • MISSION OBJECTIVE_ ▭▭▭▭▭▭▭▭▭▭ 0% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 11TH

the premise that stores the servers is blocked off to the public. scanners for student and staff IDs stand at every door. there is a security guard at the mouth of a road leading into campus grounds.  

you present your badge with colored ink and embossed features mapping out lie after lie. the emblem of the four lions perched catches the reader’s eyes. they scan it with scrutiny and criticism.

“IB is assigned to a tech issue?” they ask.

“any matter dealing with homeland security is our business. i can’t disclose anything further than that. they sent me from new delhi as soon as possible.” you deliver your lines with confidence, and just the right amount of ease to make the performance believable. the language and accent flows off your tongue after practicing on the plane. 

you hold out a yellow envelope with no intent on handing it over. “the authorizations issued are contained in here. do you have the clearance to check these?” 

“yes? i mean, no.”

“is there someone around who does?” hold your ground.

“the security chief out on a lunch break.” ( convenient. )

“alright then i’ll wait for your chief. i don’t want to make this hard on you after all.” earn their trust. 

“thank you. i’m just a patroller.” ( convenient. ) “i don’t have the authority to let anybody in or out without clearing it with my chief.” 

“of course, i completely understand that. you’re just doing your job” you put on a smile to warm the mood. “it’s tragic what happened in the city. i heard about it when i got assigned. i hope all of the families are coping well. i wish i could do more for them.”

“it is a tragedy when some people think they can do whatever to other people’s lives like that.”

“i agree. i think it’s commendable that even in the face of a tragedy, people like you are still doing their jobs to the fullest. like keeping an institute safe from outsiders. even people like me.”

you share a short laugh together.

the patroller scratches their head. “not really, no. you flatter me. there’s not much to keep safe nowadays.”

you feel the metaphorical tip of your shovel striking the outer shell of the treasure. “oh?” you feign surprise. “i think you’re being humble. you protect people. that’s very dutiful.”

“no.” they wave their hand. “other than every day cleaning and security staff members, the tech heads haven’t been showing up. they’re taking the servers thing harder than i imagined.”

“really? not a single one shows up?”

“not according to my entry logs.” 

“that’s a shame,” you remark. you check your watch and leave the kind patroller with promises that you’ll come back after lunch time. 

• • • MISSION OBJECTIVE_ ▬▭▭▭▭▭▭▭▭▭ 10% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 11TH – 13TH

your one sided conversations through your ear piece fill the spaces of your hotel. 

“i need you to run recent location checks and bank checks for some names.”

“ramani bhatt. alia desai. arun gupta. pooja patel. [...]”

...

“no strange bank withdraws?”

...

“yes, i understand it’s a lot for you. i realize you’re doing the job for a team of five.”

“can you work through the night?”

...

“you spotted one on a highway traffic cam? which highway was it? okay. got it. i’m looking now. seems like it leads out of northern mumbai.”

“another one going out? well this road specifically leads to the airport. you already looked into it, of course. my bad. so they didn’t fly out.”

“wait, that road. what’s it’s name again? yeah that one. it leads to dharavi. all of the spots we’ve marked circle around this city.”

• • • MISSION OBJECTIVE_ ▬▬▭▭▭▭▭▭▭▭ 20% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 14TH

with the help of your handler, you two find one person who actually made a stop within dharavi. this was a few days ago but you’ll follow any lead that comes. of course, you never ask for others to do something you won’t do. you dawn a simple shirt and shorts in order to blend in with your environment. within a two block radius, you stay up to check out one location after another. 

in the afternoon you notice teens playing soccer for the second day in a row. you wait for the ball to go out of bounds and seize the chance to fetch it for them. “i’m looking for my friends,” you tell the locals. they point down the road when you tell them your ‘friends’ aren’t locals but they pass through a lot. 

“is there something fun down there to visit or something?” an incredulous laugh covers your piqued interest. 

they look at you like you were a naive child for saying something like that. when you check out the area, you understand why. dust blankets over the abandoned apartment complex from top to bottom. five floors worth of rooms with no cameras. or other forms of tech, to tap into means that you have to be creative.

you pull the knob turner on your watch until it comes off completely. the watch face is thick and is made to look cheap. from within, a small droid flies out.

“you got this?” you say to your handler back home. 

the droid whips down the hallway and you place your spectacles over your eyes. everything that the droid sees goes straight into a feed in your glasses and that is relayed back to HQ. floor after floor you see nothing but dirty rooms. it isn’t until the fifth floor that you spot a boarded up room. 

• • • MISSION OBJECTIVE_ ▬▬▬▭▭▭▭▭▭▭ 30% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 15TH

it’s midnight when you grab your equipment and come back. you plug in a usb into whatever computer that can turn on. your handler can remotely access the computer on a shallow basis. they can view what’s on the computer but not necessarily do much else.

that’s where you come in ( regrettably ). 

“so there are huge files that are protected? ––encrypted. there, are you happy now?”

“saying that this is a windows and not a super computer doesn’t mean much to me, but i get what you’re saying. i guess testing every algorithm won’t work.”

“you want me to do what?”

“you know that in the time it takes for you to walk me through things, you can come here and do it yourself, right?”

“you believe in me.” you huff out a soft laugh. “alright. teach me.”

they tell you you need to find a key–– then proceeds to chuckle when you ask if it’s a physical one. they continue on saying that they’re going to send a malware to your email. you plug your phone to the computer and run the malware program.

the program apparently runs through a computer’s memory to see what encryption process was used. by knowing that, then a key to solving the encryption can be obtained. 

...

you doze off for two hours while the program is running. you awaken to check the program, not knowing how to make heads or tails of it. the status bar is still running so you leave it alone. your handler has been quiet and you assume either they’re sleeping or working. 

...

four hours later you wake up. not because you feel well rested enough, but because your stomach needs quelling. 

there’s a protein bar in your bag that you scarf down before going back to sleep.

...

7:00 AM.

this time you wake up to your handler tsk tsk-ing at you.

“don’t give me that. how is the program doing?"

“you’ve found the key. great. so now what?”

“yes, i believe i did tell you this would be less efficient. even before you realized how much info is in here.” 

“alright. well whenever you find someone to get the algorithm written send it to me.”

• • • MISSION OBJECTIVE_ ▬▬▬▬▭▭▭▭▭▭ 40% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 15TH

9:00 AM.

“anybody yet?”

“okay. keep looking and keep me posted.”

...

2:45 PM

“you got somebody. fantastic.” ( about time. )

“do me a favor and change this priority to yellow status. i just need to to be done. thanks.”

...

6:50 PM

“in HQ? get up and leave now.”

“forget the mission. you need to go.”

“don’t send me anything. evacuate.”

“i am your superior. listen to me.”

you are pacing back and forth in the abandoned room. this mission isn’t worth losing a life over. 

“okay, okay, okay. i got it. i got it. do as you’re told now.”

...

7:00 PM

you lose all contact with HQ. your glasses cannot read or send any information to the servers. you had two choices.

one: catch the next flight back. two: continue on

you choose the latter. not for lack of consideration for your coworkers but you are more beneficial to everybody here. your handler risked everything to get you this program so you need to see it to the end. you owe it to them to uncover the truth.

• • • MISSION LOG_ ▬▬▬▬▬▭▭▭▭▭ 50% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 17TH

you’ve bought enough food from the city to last you a week. you hole yourself up in this room, waiting for the program to finish. your handler told you this version isn’t streamline enough and it requires monitoring once it starts. you don’t know any better so you follow the instructions given to you to the tee.

• • • MISSION OBJECTIVE_ ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▭▭▭ 70% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 19TH

you are tempted to bring in someone, anyone, to help you hurry this process along. but considering the level of security on these files and the sheer volume of the files, you don’t have that luxury. patience calls your name and you have no choice but to respond. 

• • • MISSION OBJECTIVE_ ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▭▭ 80% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 21TH

you chow down another cup of ramen for yet another meal. your eyes tire from staring at the screens for so long. you manually enter one prompt after the next, wishing that you can scream at whoever assigned you this mission. 

• • • MISSION OBJECTIVE_ ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ 100% COMPLETED

OCTOBER 24TH

the process is finished and the window disappears. it’s the most anticlimactic ending but the stress melts right off your shoulders. 

you go through the folders individually. each of them are labeled with a name and it goes on for several scrolls. altogether there are about one hundred of them. you click one open and within are columns full of pdf files. from just the very first file, it looks like several experiment trials–– visuals included. 

the first one, AMELIA, turns out to be a two year old pig.

then BAKER, DYLAN, a thirty year old male. 

LEE, JOOHYUN, a ten year old girl.

the data goes on like this without fail. 

the reality of the situation makes your stomach lurch, but you read as many as you can bear. the after images hit you harder than any punch you’ve ever endured. you gathered enough information to know the experiment dealt with specialized steroid effects.

without hesitation you exit out and check some unmarked folders. you run them in a text format and they detail bank activities from an account under the name kumar adani.

each piece resembles the same completed photo but you’re not quite sure how they fit together just yet. at this point you know that there’s no choice but to load as much of the data onto the hard drive built in your ring.

it’s time to go home.

[redkiteradio]

7 Trends You May Have Missed About fireinsidemusic

Correction Appended

On an album of bittersweet childrens music that she wrote greater than a decade in the past, the woman who came being regarded only because the piano Instructor available what, in hindsight, looks like an eerie glimpse of her own long run.

Im relocating away currently to a spot so distant, in which no person is aware my identify, she wrote while in the lyrics of a tune referred to as Relocating.

When she wrote that tune, she was youthful and vivacious, a piano Trainer and freelance audio writer who loved Beethoven and jazz, sunsets and river Seems, extensive walks and every thing about New York.

On a type of beloved walks, by Central Park in the intense sun of a June working day in 1996, a homeless drifter beat her and attempted to rape her, leaving her clinging to daily life. After the attack, the terms to her music arrived real. She moved away, away from New York City, from her previous life, and all but her closest mates didn't know her title. To the rest of the globe, she was — much like the a lot more well-known jogger attacked in Central Park 7 many years previously — an nameless image of the city nightmare. She was the piano Trainer.

Now, to the 10th anniversary of the attack, she's celebrating what appears to be her complete Restoration from brain trauma. She's 42, married, with a small child. She is Kyle Kevorkian McCann, the piano teacher, and he or she would like to tell her Tale, her way.

Her health care provider told her it could consider 10 years to Get better, and Sunday was that talismanic anniversary. I really feel my lifetime has actually been redefined by Central Park, she reported many days back, her voice tender and hopeful. Prior to park; just after park. Will there ever be considered a time when I dont Feel, Oh, this is the 10th anniversary, the 11th anniversary?

She spoke in her modest ranch home within a wooded subdivision in the Ny suburb. She sat inside a dining room strewn with toys, surrounded by photographs of her cherubic, dark-haired two-year-outdated daughter. A Steinway grand crammed 50 % the home, and at one position she sat down and played. Her participating in was forceful, but she seemed embarrassed to Engage in quite a lot of bars, and shrugged, rather than answering, when asked the identify on the piece. She questioned that her daughter and her town not be named.

She phone calls that working day, June four, 1996, the day After i was harm.

Hers was the 1st in the string of attacks by the same guy on 4 Gals above 8 times. The last target, Evelyn Alvarez, sixty five, was beaten to Loss of life as she opened her Park Avenue dry-cleaning store, and in the end, the assailant, John J. Royster, was convicted of murder and sentenced to life in prison.

Still the assault within the piano teacher may be the just one individuals seem to recollect quite possibly the most. Section of the fascination needs to do with echoes of your 1989 attack around the Central Park jogger. But Furthermore, it frightened people in a means the assault to the jogger did not because its instances had been so mundane.

It didn't take place in a very distant Element of the park late during the night, but in close proximity to a well known playground at 3 inside the afternoon. It might have transpired to anyone. The tension was heightened with the thriller on the piano academics identity.

For 3 days, as law enforcement and Medical professionals experimented with to find out who she was, she lay in a very coma in her clinic bed, nameless. Her mothers and fathers had been on family vacation and her boyfriend, also a musician, was in Europe, on tour. At last, one of her students recognized a police sketch and was capable of determine her in the clinic by her fingers, simply because her facial area was swollen over and above recognition. The law enforcement did not release her identify.

The very last thing she remembers about June 4, 1996, is giving a lesson in her studio apartment on West 57th Avenue, then putting her long hair in a ponytail and heading out to get a stroll. She does not remember the attack, While she has heard the accounts from the police and prosecutors.

To me its like a fact I learned and memorized, she stated. As though I were a college student in school learning record.

She would not think about The person who did it. I might need been angry for the minute, but not much longer than that, she claimed. How could I be offended at John Royster? He was declared not crazy, but I assume by our standards he was.

Dr. Jamshid Ghajar, her medical professional at The big apple Healthcare facility-Cornell Medical Center, as it was acknowledged in 1996, instructed reporters that she had a ten percent probability of survival. Health professionals experienced to eliminate her forehead bone, which was later changed, to help make place for her swelling brain. When her mother manufactured a community attract pray for my daughter, hundreds did.

Right after 8 days, she came from a coma, very first inside a vegetative state, then inside of a childlike point out. As she recovered, she slept very little and talked continuously, often in gibberish. I was acquiring mad at individuals when they didnt reply to these phrases, she explained.

Like an Alzheimers affected individual, she experienced minimal limited-time period memory and would ignore people as soon as they remaining the home.

Over a number of months, she needed to relearn how to stroll, gown, go through and produce. Her boyfriend, Tony Scherr, frequented every day to play guitar for her. He encouraged her to Participate in the piano, versus the advice of her Actual physical therapists, who believed she could well be annoyed by her inability to play how she as soon as had. Mr. Scherr played Beatles duets along with her, actively playing the remaining-hand component although she performed the right.

That was my best therapy, she explained.

In August, she moved back again house to New Jersey, together with her father, an engineer, and mom, a schoolteacher. She visited aged haunts and referred to as good friends, trying to revive her shattered memory. I used to be pretty obsessed with remembering, she mentioned. Any memory decline was to me an indication of abnormality or deficit.

Her therapists assumed her development was wonderful, but her two sisters protested that she wasn't the deep thinker she had been.

What bothered her most was that she had missing the ability to cry, just as if a faucet inside of her Mind had been turned off. One particular evening, 9 months just after she was damage, she stayed up late to look at the John Grisham Motion picture A Time and energy to Get rid of. Just right after her father had gone to mattress, she viewed a courtroom scene of Samuel Jacksons character on trial for killing two Adult men who experienced raped his youthful daughter.

The faucet opened, along with the tears trickled down her cheeks. I thought about my mothers and fathers, my father, and whatever they went by, she said. Very little by small, my sensation returned, my depth of thoughts returned.

Urged by her sisters, she went back again to school and obtained a masters degree in songs education.

Not everything went properly. She and Mr. Scherr break up up 5 years after the assault, while they remain good friends. She dated other Guys, but she generally advised them concerning the attack right away — she couldn't support it, she reported — and they by no means called for just a next day.

We have to discover you someone, her Pal David Phelps, a guitar player, explained 4 yrs back, ahead of introducing her to Liam McCann, a pc technician and novice drummer. For as soon as, she didn't say nearly anything with regards to the assault until she bought to learn Mr. McCann, after which when she did, he admired her power.

Mayor Rudolph W. Giuliani, who had normally visited her at her bedside when she was from the medical center, married them in his Occasions Square Business. She wore a blue dress and pearls. Though she was Expecting, within a burst of creative imagination, she and her good friends recorded Although Had been Young, an album of childrens tracks that she had prepared prior to the assault, such as the track Transferring. Her ex-boyfriend, Mr. Scherr, created the CD. On it, her spouse performs drums and she plays electrical piano.

Is her existence as it absolutely was? Not specifically, though she is reluctant to attribute the dissimilarities to her injuries. Her previous two piano learners remaining her, with no contacting to clarify why, she mentioned. She has resumed playing classical new music, but easy parts, mainly because her daughter isn't going to give her time for you to exercise. As for jazz, I dont even consider, she stated.

She would want to drive more, sensation stranded from the suburbs, but she is definitely rattled. She attempts to be content material with keeping house and caring for her daughter.

Dr. Ghajar, a medical professor of neurological surgical procedure at what on earth is now referred to as New York-Presbyterian Hospital/Weill Cornell Clinical Middle, who operated on Ms. Kevorkian McCann once the assault, said last week that her level of recovery was unusual. Shes fundamentally normal, he stated.

Other gurus, who are not personally aware of Ms. Kevorkian McCanns circumstance, are more cautious.

Regaining a chance to Enjoy the piano may well entail an Pretty much mechanical method, a semiautomatic remember of what the fingers should do, claimed Dr. Yehuda Ben-Yishay, a professor of clinical rehabilitation drugs at Big apple College Faculty of Drugs. The moment Mind-injured, you will be always Mind-injured, for the rest of your daily life, Dr. Ben-Yishay claimed. There is not any overcome, There's only intensive compensation.

The greater telling part of a Restoration, in his check out, is psychological, and on that score he counts Ms. Kevorkian McCanns relationship and youngster as an important victory.

For her portion, the piano teacher appreciates she has modified, but she has manufactured her peace with it. I was type of a hyper —— I dont know if I was a kind A, but I had been ambitious, she states. Why was I so ambitious? I used to be a piano Instructor. I dont know what the ambition was about. I actually did return to the individual Im designed to be.

[lakkimi]

[PIC/TRANS] FTISLAND’s Cosmopolitan Magazine June 2017 Interview

FTISLAND is celebrating their 10th anniversary this year. Honestly, in Korea, it is not an easy thing to maintain a group, let alone a band, for 10 years. 

Hongki: Yes, indeed. When we were younger when we were going to debut, we didn’t really want to debut. Since we debuted when we were still really inexperienced, (now) music-wise, we still have so many things that we want to try, and we have so many things that we still want to do better. Honestly, for several years, we didn’t really have the ambition to have promotional activities since we came to do music. The numerical figure of “10 years″ somewhat holds a heavy meaning to us now.

To be able to stay solid for a long time, what do you think is your driving force?

Hongki: We are a band. For a band, the nature of the range of music that we can do is wide. And yet, (at the same time) we have our own color too. “Why is the market for bands in Korea this stagnant?” is FTISLAND’s driving force for keep being active. Honestly, at the same time, our identity as a band that has been through its own period of crisis is also our driving force. When we endeavored to do band music which at the same time drives us further from the music that the public like, at times, the feeling of wanting to give up came to mind. Even though so, we still believe that the fact that we are doing the music that we like is the most important thing.

Does FTISLAND identify themselves as a rock band?

Hongki: We have always said, we are “a band that goes with the season”, we would like to use such expression. As much as we want to do music that depends on the season, for that much too that we want to show all kinds of genre that we can do. Be it modern, up-tempo, jazz, hard rock, and more, we want to show a wide variety of genres. Since we have the ambition to show everything, it is hard to think of one certain formula to define us. 

When FTISLAND debuted in 2007, frankly, in music broadcasts filled with idol music, there was barely any instances for them to have a group sound. However now, there has been an emergence of bands that do music. Then, in what aspect that FTISLAND can pride themselves on compared to them?

Hongki: I think its the fact that we have come a long way, also, the fact that we are the first one who tried this path and actually is doing well. We are proud that even though we’ve had our trials and errors, but we are holding on our music strongly. Very recently, I went to that mask broadcast, and the panelist gave us a compliment, “You are really cool.” Didn’t we set popularity aside to pursue our music? I’m thinking, it might be that, that makes us look cool. Won’t it be that very aspect that sets us aside from the others, our courage to sacrifice charts.

So you are saying that you are giving up on charts?

Minhwan: Frankly speaking, there is a bit of distance between the so called “popular music” and music. Consequently, it is a possibility that we are driven further from popularity. Even though so, unlike what I thought, it feels much more comfortable this way. We don’t really have to look at the music charts. Meanwhile, we have also earned many more manias as we do more concerts. Even though so, slowly, I have also become more greedy. The thought that “It would be great if the “popular music” can also accept our music” has come to mind. 

You’re saying that you don’t really have to look at charts actually looks really cool haha

Seunghyun: Haha.. honestly, I still look at them. I am curious about who is popular lately. 

Even though so, as Minhwan said, wouldn’t it be great if the general public can accept band music as well. Since it will diversify the music markets too. 

Seunghyun: Indeed, if we can pursue both at the same time, wouldn’t it be the best? I have become more greedy.

Hongki: That’s true. As we release more albums, naturally, the ambition to also succeed in that aspect (t/n: popular music chart) has also come to mind. 

But I’m sure that music-wise, FTISLAND will still walk on their way, of course. Your debut song was an emotional piece, while you have also shown your hard rock after that. For your upcoming 10th anniversary album, what would it be like?

Hongki: For this album, I have asked the acquaintances around us to help monitoring. And they all told us, “You have done all the music that a band can do.” Its that much that we try to do a wide variety of genre. Consequently, we also have emotional songs too (in this album). 

For this upcoming promotional activity, among the members, do you have a fixed goal already? Albeit small?

Hongki: Its been a while, we kind of want to see our songs on the chart. haha

Jaejin: It really has been a while that we saw it. Now, slowly, even though only at the bottom, let’s see our songs in the charts!

Hongki: Thanks to our fans, Take Me Now and Pray .. (t/n: I’m sorry, this part is cut! If the magazine is published and we have scans, I will update it! T_T)

Haha. On that note, for the band FTISLAND who is commemorating their 10th anniversary now, is being attached to the label “idol” uncomfortable?

Hongki: Of course, in the past to be labeled as “idol band” is something that we don’t particularly like. Since we think that the music that we do is not idol music. But now, we like it. If we say that we don’t want to be an idol anymore, won’t it just show our age? That’s why, somehow, on the way, we have dropped that (t/n: the notion of not being an idol).

Thinking about it, it has also been 10 years that FTISLAND has served in the company. For FTISLAND, until how far do you want to go?

Hongki: Until as long as I can protect my vocal chord. Actually, not long ago, I went to watch Coldplay’s concert, I received such a big motivation there. If you know me, I didn’t really like Coldplay at first. Before, I thought that they are just an imitation of Radiohead. But, slowly, I got to know their color. Their songs like Yellow is a song that was able to be received well, isn’t it? In that aspect, I received such a big motivation. Be it from their way in handling music or their way in leading concerts, I think they are amazing. I want us to be a band that can give happiness to anyone, and a band that anyone can look up to, just like them. But to be able to reach that, we still have a long way, I guess? In the meantime, we still have to go to the army too. Haha. Everyone should stay away from incidents too. 

But, FTISLAND hasn’t been on any incidents, right?

Seunghyun: Yes, that’s true, thankfully.

Hongki: We want to keep going on staying away from incidents like this. For us, whether we are going to be married, or whatever that we are going to do, we want to keep going on under FTISLAND’s name.. (t/n: This part is also cut, I will update it if we have scans later. :))

Translated by Lu / My usual disclaimer applies: This might be not 100% accurate. Please let me know if you have feedback! :)

[ossyuche]

Why Some Women Find Love and Others Do Not

  If you already know you want to take advantage of my 10th Anniversary special for $50 off “Believe in Love — 7 Steps to Letting Go of Your Past, Embracing the Present and Dating with Confidence,” click here and put in coupon code BIL50.

This is your perfect chance to save money and feel optimistic about love once again.

As you learned the other day, I have been married for ten years and I’ve been coaching for fifteen. And I’ve put a LOT of thought into what I’m about to share with you below, so please, pay close attention:

There are four states of being when it comes to relationships:

Happily Single, Unhappily Single, Happily Coupled, and Unhappily Coupled.

If we were to rank them, from worst to best, I think most people would conclude:

Worst: Unhappily Single/Unhappily Coupled

Middle: Happily Single

Best: Happily Coupled

While we can argue about whether it’s better to be miserable alone or miserable with a partner, we can’t debate two things:

Whether it’s better to be happy than unhappy.

Whether it’s better to be in love or alone.

The jury is in. The tribe has spoken.

Pretty much all of us would rather share a fun, passionate, safe, stable, long-term relationship than to just be happy alone with our work, friends, pets and hobbies.

There’s nothing really controversial about this idea until you start to dig into it and see how we don’t necessarily live our lives according to this calculus. To wit:

If Happily Coupled is better than Happily Single, why do you try to convince yourself that you’re actually happier alone?

Take a second. Think about it.

If you’ve ever told yourself the lie that you’d rather be alone, what you’re REALLY stating is that you’d rather be Happily Single than Unhappily Coupled.

And who could blame you? Anyone freshly out of a bad marriage or toxic relationship would not want to repeat that experience again.

Alas, what you haven’t done is consider the third choice: Happily Coupled!

Interesting, isn’t it?

Basically, if you — like the rest of us — have experienced nothing but failure in the realm of relationships, your mind takes a shortcut: in order to avoid the pain of getting heartbroken, you don’t even consider the possibility that you can create an easy, joyous relationship.

You create a false dichotomy between being alone and getting devastated, when the third choice — Happily Coupled – is actually the most desirable outcome.

In other words, you live your entire life in fear of the worst-case scenario, and therefore, handicap your ability to achieve the best-case scenario.

Not anymore.

After hearing thousands of women complain how there are no good guys, how men only want one thing, how impossible it is to find a quality relationship-oriented man, I created an entire program around one question: why you should believe in love.

Believe in Love is laid out in 7 easy steps:

Let Go of Your Past

Set Realistic Expectations

Overcome Negativity

Defeat Your Fear of Failure

Reframe Your False Beliefs

Carry Yourself with Confidence

Take Action Now

Each step is around thirty pages long and comes with a few short exercises to help you rewire your mind and get all the tools you need to create lasting love.

Wait — Reading? Exercises? Tools? Why so much work? You just want Mr. Right to knock on your door with a diamond ring — to get happily married without any dating, risk, time or emotional vulnerability.

Sorry, but that’s not how it works.

Praying for a man will not deliver you a man. God isn’t Federal Express.

Not looking for love means only that you will not find love.

No dates means no opportunities for you to make a lasting connection.

Focusing all your attention on work, travel, family, and hobbies means only that you’ll reach the very middle of human happiness: happily single.

Which is to say that until you Believe in Love, you will never be Happily Coupled.

You will never achieve your peak happiness.

You will never have your husband greet you with an egg white omelet and fresh-squeezed orange juice on Saturday.

You will never have your husband surprise you with a weekend away in Vegas and two tickets to Cirque du Soleil.

You will never have your husband comfort you after a hard day at work in which he listens to you vent, draws you a warm bath, and hands you a glass of red wine.

You will never have your husband make you laugh until your sides split while you’re driving to buy groceries for your dinner party.

You will never have your husband give you three screaming orgasms and fall asleep spooning you until the following morning.

You will never have your husband provide you with love, support, and companionship that good men routinely give their wives — a date to every wedding, a shoulder to cry on for every funeral, a best friend for everything in between.

In short, you will never reach the heights of what’s possible in life.

You deserve to be that happy, but it won’t happen if you convince yourself that your only choices are to be unhappily coupled or single forever.

There is a third way — a better way to live life — and I’m going to help you get there.

To celebrate 10 years of wedded bliss to my wife (after nearly giving up on love myself six months before meeting her), I am offering you my favorite program, “Believe in Love — 7 Steps to Letting Go of the Past, Embracing the Present and Dating with Confidence,” for $50 off of the $147 retail price.

Just click here, put in coupon code BIL50, and enjoy having your whole world turned around in less than a week.

Believe in Love contains an eBook, a workbook, an audio, three value-added bonuses and a 30-day 100% money-back guarantee.

This sale only lasts through Sunday, November 4th at 11:59pm PST, so act now.

I can’t wait to hear how much better you feel when you’ve gone through my 7 steps and can say, how much more confident you feel about your relationship prospects.

Warmest wishes and much love,

Your friend,

Evan

P.S. Elizabeth is a former client who sent me this email just this morning. I think it’s a perfect reminder of why you need to “Believe in Love.”

I so enjoyed reading all of your materials. Even at the time, I recognized I was learning a lot, and more importantly, gaining a new perspective on how to approach dating again after my 15-year marriage ended. I had to kiss a few more frogs that year, but don’t worry – there is a happy ending to this story!

Almost exactly two years later, I met a wonderful guy on Match by following what I learned in your programs. He pursued me from the start, has always treated me wonderfully, and very quickly he became my best friend and the love of my life. And almost exactly three years later, I am writing to say that we are engaged to be married in July of this year. I have others to thank, of course, including good friends who gave good advice. But Evan, I really feel you deserve the largest share of the thanks for creating and maintaining a truly wonderful program that helps us get out of our own way so we can actually enjoy dating and relationships again. I especially appreciate how you have made your materials accessible to people from all walks of life so there’s something available for everyone who is open to learning.

So now I finally understand what you have said about how worthwhile it is to keep trying and never give up on finding love. If this 50 year-old divorced woman can do it (and I know you work with people of all ages) then pretty much anyone else can do it to, if they set their minds to it.

Anyway, I hope this email reaches you, with my sincere thanks and best wishes for health and happiness to you and your lovely family,

Elizabeth

I don’t write these testimonials, my friend.

This is what happens when you Believe in Love.

Click here to learn more and don’t forget to put in BIL50 to get $50 off.

The post Why Some Women Find Love and Others Do Not appeared first on Dating Coach – Evan Marc Katz | Understand Men. Find Love..

Related posts:

To Be (Alone) or Not to Be (Alone)? That Is the Question.

The Blessing (and Curse) of Being Happily Single

Single Men Are More Worried About How It Looks to Others

Original source: https://www.evanmarckatz.com/blog/uncategorized/why-some-women-find-love-and-others-do-not-2

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[latesthollywoodnews]

Joe Jonas BITTER About Camp Rock On 10th Anniversary For THIS Reason

Joe Jonas BITTER About Camp Rock On 10th Anniversary For THIS Reason

Jeremy Brown - Latest News - My Hollywood News

Joe Jonas BITTER About Camp Rock On 10th Anniversary For THIS Reason, Hollywood Celebrity Club.

Top Rated Celebrities and Most Popular Celebrities, Hollywood Celebrities Latest Story 2017, Joe Jonas BITTER About Camp Rock On 10th Anniversary For THIS Reason.

Hollywood Celebrities Official Latest Story Upcoming Celebrity News famous Cartoon Network Studios is an American animation studio based in Burbank, California. It is owned by Cartoon Network and Turner Broadcasting System, which are both subsidiaries of Time Warner.

Who married Sleeping Beauty?

Prince Phillip tells his father that he has met a young woman in the forest and that he will marry her, against his father’s will. Unbeknownst to Hubert, this young woman is Aurora under the disguise of “Briar Rose”, the fake identity the fairies have given her to protect her from Maleficent.

What is Mulan’s last name?

Although Mulan is set in north China, where the dominant language is Mandarin, the Hollywood film uses the Cantonese pronunciation, “Fa”, of her family name. In Mandarin her name is pronounced “Hua”.

Why was Hollywoodland created?

With limited finances, Walt had to find affordable land. It was also important that his park be located near a major highway. In August of 1953, Hollywood and his partners selected a 160-acre orange grove in Anaheim, California to be the site of Hollywoodland. The construction of Hollywoodland began during the summer of 1954.

More Celebrity News ►►

On the 10th anniversary of the Disney film, Joe Jonas reveals he’s BITTER About Camp Rock For THIS Reason, PLUS Nick & Kevin Weren’t Supposed To Be In It?! Oh Mylanta.

Can you believe it’s been 10 years since Camp Rock debuted on the Disney Channel? I feel so old…

10 years later, we’re finally getting some deets on the behind the scenes and guess what. The director of Camp Rock, Matthew Diamond, just revealed a startling piece of information. Nick and Kevin Jonas weren’t supposed to be in the film. WHAT?! Diamond said, QUOTE ““[We] actually refashioned the script to reflect the brothers because they hadn’t been in the prior [draft].” How dare you. Can you imagine the film without the band of siblings?! In the original script, Shane Gray aka Joe Jonas is sent back to Camp Rock by his manager, not his bandmates. But the director said he dawned on them that having Shane’s equally handsome bandmates send him to Camp Rock was a much better idea than using some music manager. Diamond isn’t the only one reflecting on Camp Rock’s legacy on this 10 year anniversary. Joe Jonas is having feelings, too. Bitter ones. In a hilarious tweet that mimicked how the rest of us feel, Joe said, QUOTE “10 years of Camp Rock and I’m still bitter we lost.” To which a fan pointed out, “That was in Camp Rock 2, Joseph.”

And Joseph replied, “I know Dani. But Shane Grey never forgets where he came from #stillbitter #theogmrgreywillseeyounow. That 50 Shades of Grey reference really killed me inside. Can you imagine 50 shades starring… Joe Jonas? I’m gonna fantasize about that all day. Anyway, while many of us including Joe are wallowing in bitterness and sadness at how old we’re all getting, Kevin is considering a Camp Rock 3. He told e! News recently, QUOTE “Never say never” regarding bringing Camp Rock back to life. QUOTE “We talked about it for a minute, doing something ridiculous like an R-rated version now in our life, like a going back to camp kind of thing.” Please. Please do. Just, yes. Please. Kevin said he would “definitely consider” another Camp Rock sequel, explaining, QUOTE “It just has to be the right thing. I can’t believe 10 years has actually passed. It makes me feel like I’m getting old.” I know! Stop saying it out loud. Anyway, Kevin is on board. And so is Joe. He previously told Marie Claire that he’d totaaly do an R-rated version of the Disney comedy. QUOTE “If it made sense, sure.

For all of us—Demi, Nick, it would be funny to do a spin on it. Do the graduating days, make it kinda dark. An adult film.” Nick? Demi? Ball’s in your court now kids. Do you guys think the film should stay retired or should we dust it off and breathe new life into it? Comment below and hit me up on Twitter @Miriamisa and the Gram @Miriam_isa. And speaking of Disney’s golden age of television, Selena Gomez just teased us with a very disturbing horror film on Instagram. Click here to find out where, what and just WHY. I’m Miriam isa and thanks for hanging out with me on Clevver! See you soon.

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Best Hollywood Celebrities ever, Must Watch English Celebrities, Joe Jonas BITTER About Camp Rock On 10th Anniversary For THIS Reason.

Hollywood continued to focus its talents on television throughout the 1950s. Its weekday afternoon children’s television program The Mickey Mouse Club, featuring its roster of young “Mouseketeers”, premiered in 1955 to great success, as did the Davy Crockett miniseries, starring Fess Parker and broadcast on the Hollywoodland anthology show. New Hollywood Celebrities 2018, Joe Jonas BITTER About Camp Rock On 10th Anniversary For THIS Reason.

https://www.myhollywoodnews.com/joe-jonas-bitter-about-camp-rock-on-10th-anniversary-for-this-reason/

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50 Years Later, Heinz Approves Don Draper’s ‘Pass the Heinz’ Ads and Is Actually Running Them

It was a compelling idea, even if the client wan’t convinced at the time.

Fifty years ago, in the fictional world of Mad Men, Don Draper pitched a daring ad campaign to Heinz execs, for the brand’s ketchup, that proposed not showing the product at all. Instead, the ads would show close-ups of foods that go great with ketchup—french fries, a cheeseburger, a slice of steak—but without any ketchup in sight.

Don’s proposed tagline: “Pass the Heinz.”

The campaign’s “Got Milk?”-like strategy of creating a craving for a product through its absence was apparently too far ahead of its time. Don didn’t get the account. (Nor, for that matter, did Peggy Olson, who, pitching for a competing agency, presented a much more product-centric campaign right after Don.)

But now, in 2017, the time for “Pass the Heinz” has come.

In a meta union of advertising’s real and fictional worlds, Heinz just greenlighted the ads—and will run them almost exactly as Draper intended them, beginning today, in print and out-of-home executions in New York City.

Partly a PR stunt, partly just solid on-brand communications, the campaign is sure to delight fans of the AMC show, which in July will celebrate the 10th anniversary of its premiere. And in a nice touch, the ads are officially being credited to Heinz’s current agency, David Miami, and to Don’s fictional 1960s firm, Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce. (Draper and Mad Men creator Matthew Weiner, who approved the idea, are both listed in the credits, along with David staffers.)

Below are the three ads that are running.

Heinz tells AdFreak that each one will get its own billboard in NYC. All three ads will also run in the New York Post, and the fries execution will run in Variety too. The ads will get support across Heinz’s social media channels as well.

Nicole Kulwicki, head of the Heinz brand, told AdFreak the timing was right to finally approve an idea that was presented (but not really) so many decades ago.

“Even though Don Draper created the ‘Pass the Heinz’ campaign almost 50 years ago, the communications still really work in today’s world,” she said. “Mr. Draper really understood the one thing every Heinz fan knows, which is to never settle for the foods you love without the great taste of Heinz. What we loved about the campaign is that it doesn’t require paragraphs of copy to explain it. It features mouthwatering food images, and all that’s missing is the Heinz.”

Anselmo Ramos, chief creative officer of David, joked that he met with Draper recently (it’s good to hear Don is still with us—at what would be 91 years old). “We had a couple of Old Fashioneds,” Ramos said, “and he gave me the mechanics from the original campaign.”

In truth, David had to re-create the images from scratch. “We didn’t have the files, so we had to do a photo shoot,” Ramos said. “It needed to look exactly the same, and that was a beautiful challenge.”

Like Kulwicki, Ramos believes the concept really isn’t dated at all.

“It’s so simple,” he said. “Don did a great job. This is just 100 percent on-brand positioning. It is about never settling. You look at these beautiful shots of empty fries, or a burger, and there’s something missing. And when you say ‘Pass the Heinz,’ that’s all you need to say. You don’t need to show the product.”

In the Mad Men episode—”To Have and to Hold,” from season 6, which aired in 2013—the Heinz clients balk, clearly uncomfortable with Don’s unconventional idea, with one of them calling it “half an ad.” “They even said, ‘I want to see the bottle. I want to see the product,'” Ramos said. “And Don says, well, you don’t need to show the product, because the consumer will complete the thought. The product will be in their imagination, which is even more powerful.”

Better late than never for that client approval.

Defictionalizing ads from a TV show, and running them in the real world, is fun for both the public and the creatives at David who worked on it, said Ramos, who called it “almost like reverse product placement.”

“As you can imagine, the creatives here are really happy to see their names next to Don Draper and Matt Weiner. They’re like, ‘Oh my God, we’re collaborating with them?'” Ramos said. “It’s interesting. Sometimes you’ll have two agencies collaborating for a client. This time, it’s a fictional agency and a real agency, trying to sell a campaign that just makes sense for this brand.”

And while the media buy is limited, Kulwicki said this isn’t just a gag for Mad Men fans.

“You can be walking by the billboard and it’s still very powerful, even if you don’t understand the Mad Men connection,” she says. “Of course, we would love Mad Men fans to pick up on it, but we feel it works very well on its own, too.”

In the end, of course, the whole thing is a bit of a lark. Heinz even sent the campaign’s creative credits to AdFreak looking as though they’d been written on a typewriter. And Ramos, a bit cheekily, suggested the industry can learn something from this work.

“It took us 50 years to get this approved. So, never give up. Never settle,” he said. “Sometimes it takes a while to prove an idea you’re passionate about. Sometimes it takes fictional characters working together with real characters. But don’t give up. Eventually, if you really believe in your idea, you’ll get it approved.”

(Source: © 2016 ABN | All Rights Reserved)