#Work on my careplan for a few

[squigglywindy]

Me: "sob"

Autocorrect: "surely you meant son. You're not allowed to be this angsty all the time. He choked on a heartbroken son you fool"

[nursemendoza1]

Here with the Mendoza Boys and I’m just sending everybody good vibes to their loved ones for a Happy 🦃Thanksgiving! . . So you better be enjoying this evening and take your mind off nursing for just 45 minutes and 25 seconds.....lol, so give yourself a break before you go crazy with those Careplans or studying my fellow nursing students. . . Can you tell we stuffed our 🦃 Turkey with Prozac because we are cheesing it here with our contagious smiles...lol . . Here’s a small reminder that our nursing profession within the health care focuses on the care of individuals to recover for optimal health & quality of life right? But sometimes you have to break free from work and regather your thoughts my fellow nurses with the ones you love! . . Our minds are in constant search to align us with exactly what we're looking for. If you seem to find yourself in constant health, financial, and/or relationship discordance then it’s probably due to the fact that you're tuning into a frequency that doesn't align with what you want. . . Most people say they want one thing, but tune their emotions, energy & thoughts to the negative aspect of what they desire out of life. This is where training your mind comes into play, so here are 3 reasons why you might not be experiencing your dream as your reality: .
1. Habits: This a huge one, because this is your comfort zone. This is where most people fail at getting what they want. You can't be in the old habits & desire new outcomes. You can't repeat the same unhealthy thoughts, behavior & actions. You have to break the cycle. .
2. Pessimistic attitude is a down fall. Train your mind to be optimistic, ambitious & have faith. Start finding the good in things. .
3. Negative self talk is a dream killer & an energy depleting habit; since you haven't trained your thoughts, the same old record of "I can't" "I'm not good enough" or "It won't work for me" is continuously playing in your mind. In due time you'll rewire your train of thoughts. Alignment to what you want is only few lifestyle adjustments away. Start living your dream, the possibilities are endless my fellow CardiacStrong Nurses. https://www.instagram.com/p/CIFGxEiplsk/?igshid=1o51k71qa9j6g

[inbetweenactuality-blog]

First Semester Clinicals

As a part of one of our modules, we had 4 weeks of clinicals in our first semester, with different postings each week. I can confidently say that before clinicals, all of us were rather unexperienced and stupid, no offence intended. But honestly, though, we got to think much more clearly and critically when we experienced what really happens in hospitals.

So for our clinicals, we were assigned to mentors, as in nurses who worked there. We had to follow the mentor’s duty schedule and they were the ones responsible for us.

As part of our assessment, we had to fill a patient’s careplan everyday, which involved doing a simple head to toe assessment and taking their history in order to find out their problems. At the beginning, I didn’t know what I was doing at all, and I couldn’t finish a single careplan at the hospital. But by the end of the postings, I was able to finish careplans in a few minutes (minus all the interruptions of course, because the hospital’s a busy place). It was amazing.

Our clinical shifts were 8 and a half hours long. The morning shift is from 07:30 to 16:00. Afternoon shift is from 15:30 to 00:00. Night shift is from 23:30 to 08:00. The first 30 minutes in each shift is when handovers are given.

1st week: I was posted in an ENT ward, which had only ortho patients. In simple words, this ward was filled with very old people with bone problems, and a whole bunch of TKR cases. Since it was my first week ever, I had no idea what I was doing so I made a great deal of mistakes. My mentor was pretty crap too. She didn’t teach me much, and she wasn’t great with the patients either. I wouldn’t have wanted her as a nurse if I were sick. She didn’t talk to the patients at all except for a few necessary things. Most of the nurses in that ward were like that, so it was pretty hard to see, especially considering it was full of vulnerable old grandmas and grandpas. I was taught almost everything, not by my mentor, but by the second semester students there. Another thing I found absolutely cringe-worthy, was how whenever the doctors were rounding, the nurses would be in absolute panic mode. They’d freak out if they didn’t have a chart by the time the doctors would ask for it. It was as if they were the doctors’ assistants. I get that we should respect the doctors, but that respect should be mutual, and the nurses didn’t act in a way that’d get them that respect. One memorable patient we had was this 92 year old lady. She had no teeth, was blind in one eye, immobilised, and all that stuff very old people are. It felt very special when I was talking to her, though, especially when I understood the things she said and was able to fulfill her needs. I also came across rude relatives, who were saying things about us students not knowing what we were doing, when we were right there. It was offensive, but I learned to ignore it well. There’ll be a lot more of those in the future, so I didn’t take it too hard.

2nd week: This posting was in a medical ward, and it was completely different from the ENT ward. It was so much better. I had a great mentor and she quickly became a role model. She found humour in most things, and didn’t take things too seriously. All the nurses joked around with each other. The workload was noticeably much higher than the ENT ward, but the nurses here kept their calm and did things well AND IT WAS A WONDERFUL PLACE OKAY. I absolutely loved it here. My mentor taught me so much. She even let me give and receive handovers. I was also put in charge of one patient for an entire shift, which made me feel a sense of responsibility and I felt like I could really do this in the future. There was one very special moment I had with a patient, but I’ll tell that story in a separate post.

3rd week: This week I was posted in a different hospital, and I was in a private ward, which mostly had gynae patients, especially patients there for induction of labour, and postpartum patients. I couldn’t do much here since it was mostly babies who needed procedures done on them and I haven’t studied paediatrics yet. The nurses here were very nice, which was reflected by the patients and their relatives being nice as well. The nurses answered call lights immediately and did everything with smiles, which was sadly rare in the previous hospital. I found the private ward setting very nice. Maybe I’d consider working there after I graduate. Added bonus: most patients are very rich and leave gifts for the nurses when they’re discharged. ;) One patient gave each nurse a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates. The ward smelled like flowers the whole week.

4th week: This was in yet another hospital, which was an hour away from my house, so I moved to my aunt’s house for that week. I was posted in a gynae ward yet again.This was the most useless posting I had, firstly because my mentor was hardly around, and secondly because there were almost no patients. We only had adult patients on the first and last day of my posting. On the other days, we either had one newborn, or no patients at all. There was this nice male nurse, who kind of took me under his wing, and taught me a bunch of procedures like IV cannulation. He even asked me if I wanted to do procedures before each one. Sadly, since it’s the first semester, I didn’t know much so I couldn’t do much. I’m very grateful for him.

[freeingames-blog]

Sausages? 🍽

Sat in the main hospital Costa as I write this - a place I have come to know as a small ‘safehaven’ during my stay here in the general psych. £1.20 for a small tea (get it in the takeaway cup, cheaper) and actual wi-fi.

I have had a whirlwind 💨of a day mentally. A tour and introduction to the EDU ward brought a multitude of emotions - relief, anxiety, a fuzzy warmth.

The ward itself is clean, safe, boiling (!), calm and welcoming. The nurse we met was beyond reassuring and made me feel ‘understood’ for the hour I was there. It was quiet on the ward as many patients were on leave - the few I saw seemed to be going about their business without screaming or banging their heads against walls which was a stark contrast to the inmates I am currently surrounded by. In fact I was welcomed back to the general psych by a tornado🌪🌪 of blood, tears and a lot of police action…

After reading all of the information in the service user booklet, analysing everything the consultant I am under has ever written on ED, and researching a few ‘past-patient’ blogs from the EDU ward I am going to it seems I am in for one hell of a journey. My god - there are actual 'goals’ and there is a fully blown 'system’ going on. I am not sure what I did at The Priory but until I was put on Section 3 and devised my own 'careplan’ I had no goal. No BMI goal of any real substance and definitely no 'stages’ of recovery I had to follow. Looking back it seems positively ridiculous! It is hard for me to admit this but… I think I spent 7 months working towards… nothingness⚡️. I had no aim and no purpose for the admission at all. I am now astounded I got anything at all out of it. Given my immediate relapse and extremely chaotic first (and only) week at home, you may conclude I got nothing at all out of the experience but I did… in a sense.

At the new EDU unit there are 3 stages I will be going through. I have already signed myself up to the full recovery programme (what is the point otherwise?!) I think I know I want to reach a BMI of 20 as studies show maintaining this for a year will prevent relapse. I want to give myself the best chance possible and I actually think this unit is going to help me do this! There is a lot more 'taking responsibility for your own recovery’ at this EDU which I am already fixating on. If I am going to do this, I am bloody well going to show just how well I can do it. When we returned home my mum stated I needed to throw everything into this and be so 😬determined. She is right, of course. The fact the staff have all of these expectations and it appears I will be out in a flash if I so much as doubt my commitment, feels 'right’ and has focused me already.

I got handed a menu - it seems to be a two week cycle. It freaked me out. There are a lot of choices - we 'create’ our own meals by choosing the starter, main, sides, dessert etc. From the start. No replacements i.e. Fortisip. Tight time limits to finish. Within 2 weeks I will be on full portions and in the Stage 2 dining room and 2 weeks after that I will be serving myself with guidance from staff. Staff are in the dining room to tell you to pick up the pace etc. It seems a lot of hard bloody 😤work. At The Priory we were encouraged to pick up a fork by staff - having a small bit of a fear food was a 'wahoo’ moment and Fortisip was handed out as a replacement like candy. I think I am going to like the way this new EDU do things. It all seems so much more… logical and helpful. So much more 'okay so this is what you should be doing… you know that yourself… so do it… now do it without us asking… now start making your own food and don’t try to kid yourself as you do it’. I think this is what I need. Of course, upon first hearing all this and reading the menu I felt sick as a dog. My anorexic mind was slowly backing away and I think if there had been an 'eject’ button on the chair I was sat in you would have seen an Ames-shaped hole in the ceiling. Hot meals twice a day, compulsory hot puddings once a day, lots of pies…

After anorexia analysed the menu I decided to put it away. I am determined not to order meals which anorexia has calculated and chosen. Do I want to eat a sausage hotpot? NOOOOO SAYS ANOREXIA - YOU DON’T EAT SAUSAGES🌭… CHOOSE CHICKEN. Well I actually do want to eat a sausage once in my life! If you don’t challenge, you don’t change. And this admission is about change.

I am less terrified now that I am going to be laughed out of the building. It didn’t happen. And at some point I am going to be a higher BMI (given, with a lot of leave by then) and still be needing to be there. And that is okay. That is what I need and I am justified having a bed as long as I am committed to treatment.

I have not been given an admission day but will be ringing Tuesday to see when they can take me. Until then, I have weigh in tomorrow and of course, a ward round at some point with 🌡Doctor M in which I am sure we will both continue to agree that I should 'keep eating those apples!’

[silverskulltula]

I still have work left to do tonight and a very long, early day tomorrow but compared to my ridiculous workload the past few days this honestly feels like a break Like oh no, I have to make a pamphlet and do laundry, as compared to "let's do two separate careplans, ~22 pages of focused review AND test review while sick"