#Who I think it would be chill to have a friendly roommate-like marriage with

[quitealotofsodapop]

MvA assorted headcanons

General:

So many years together has made the core monsters inseperable. If something affects one member, it affects the group.

All. The. Monsters. Are. Family.

It takes Susan a while to understand inside jokes and past incidents because of being the most recent addition.

There are Other anomalous creatures kept in Area 5X, but they are either non-sentient and/or are too dangerous to be kept around the more human-friendly monster group.

Area 5X is so gotdang big because they were expecting a lot more kaijus like Insecto to crop up. Sadly not many have surfaced to justify the space.

There’s a hangar in Area 5X full of wrecked UFOs. Some are spacecraft wreckage while others are stuff like weird meteors (Susan’s is in there), and at least one alien creature that got crystallised upon entering Earth’s atmosphere.

There’s significant difference in staff employed at different points throughout the past 50 years. There are far more women on the Area 5X worksheet than back in the 50s, and the guards are generally more sympathetic towards the monsters. Many modern staff members have been reprimanded or let go for failing to uphold secrecy, or for unnecessary cruelty towards the monsters.

Budget cuts were a legitmate concern up until the Battle of Golden Gate Bridge. The facility was far more barebones and sterile before the government had to formally recognise Area 5X’s importance. There have been a lot of redecorating at the facilty since the fat checks started coming in.

Putting individual characters under read due to length.

Susan:

Enjoys many hobbies considered stereotypically feminine; baking, sewing, cosmetics, etc...

Grandparents and extended family are farmers or are atleast connected to the business. Modesto is the agricultural centre of California after all. Her parents were the first of their generation to go against the mold and seek out white-collar careers.

Studied cosmetology in school and was working at a beauty salon to save up for her and Derek’s wedding.

Is very athletic and grew up doing a number of physical extracurriculars like cheerleading, dodgeball, and roller-derby.

Grew up being teased for being the shortest kid in her class/family. They still tease her for it.

Greatly fears causing collateral damage and/or harm to others through her size.

Has issues with anxiety, worsened only by her new job as “savior of earth”. She wishes for a confidant to tell her worries to.

Married life with Derek was doomed to fail. Susan had a plan in place for what came after the marriage, and focusing 100% on Derek’s career was not it. There’s also the line from Derek’s mother about Susan being “the weatherman’s wife”, implying that she was to be the homemaker and not have a career of her own. It’s possible that Susan was planning to settle down and have kids with Derek, but the lack of control she had in moving to Fresno implied that more was going on.

Is currently “taking a break” from love and dating, despite gaining many new admirers.

Tries her best to return to Modesto to visit her family and friends whenever possible, though work often keeps her away for weeks at a time.

If she retains her height-shifting abilities as in the series; Susan goes through really bad “growing” pains.

Link:

Was frozen in his relative late-teens during a cold snap. Got shifted around until he ended up somewhere in Greenland before being discovered by modern humans. Post-thaw he went a bit wild, swimming frantically back south to try and find his old enviroment.

Was one of many scrappy youngsters in his troop, with a number of adoptive parents. The strongest ruled the troop, and Link was fairly weak in comparision to the leaders. He had gotten into a fight the day of his freezing (over something silly in hindsight) and swam away to sulk. When he didn’t return after the cold snap - the troop accepted that he had likely died out on his own.

Likes to freak out humans by making up weird biology facts about his species and ones he’s fought against - like joking about laying eggs or having his tail dettach and regrow like a lizard. However there’s some things he has to ask about, because he doesn’t have medical knowledge or words to describe something.

A lot of his macho behavior came from imitating the guards who kept watch on him. 1950s violent military alpha males aren't a very good role model for someone who doesnt know what societal norms are yet. Link was a lot more insufferable back in the day but chilled out as he began interacting with other walks of life.

Has a high paternal instinct and immediately becomes softer around kids and smaller animals.

Has body language similar to a cat/alligator. Slaps his tail when angry or in deep thought. And yes; Link purrs/rumbles when happy.

Loves monster movies - especially the ones where the monsters “win”. He cried when he saw “Beauty and the Beast” and then immediately booed loudly when the Beast turned human.

Does Not Trust doctors or scientists due to bad past experiences. Will only go to Dr Cockroach and Monger if he ever gets hurt/ill. Gets stressed fast if he has to be in a waiting room or doctors office.

Link had no idea what gender indentities or orientations were until recently - he did come from a pre-human civilization that really didnt mind/care about the schemantics. It took him some time to wrap his head around it. He identifies himself as bisexual after much thought and many hours alone on the computer.

Don't press him about his body. He's built different from humans and cis people. He will punch anyone who doesnt respect his or anyone elses identity.

Has been in love before. It didn’t end well.

Will occasionally wear clothes, but finds it a challenge to find anything that fits him. Will give any shoes he finds to Dr Cockroach and BOB to eat.

The best driver/pilot out of all the monsters.

Dr Cockroach:

True name is Jaques-Yves Herbert. Prefers to just go by "Dr Cockroach" because he dislikes the association with his birth family.

Picks up human languages very easily, although not as quickly as he can understand animals.

Parents were a mixed scientist couple. His father was an aggressive “Strong British Man” that would beat him son down for not following orders or for not meeting his standards for a man. Dr C turned down both chances to attend his parents funerals.

This man isn’t straight. He probably uses old-fashioned slang when asked about romance such as; “I am Uranian” or “I wear a green carnation”. It took Susan a few times to realise what he meant, as she is used to a more open minded enviroment.

Got the idea of transforming into a cockroach from reading Franz Kafkas “The Metamorphosis” as a child. He sympathized with Gregor’s abusive situation, and began considering the possibilties of how one could survive better as a creature like a cockroach.

Studied in biology and entomology in the Uk before moving to the states to follow engineering. Obtained his degree in Dance as a “side gig” in University.

Has been barred from free access to the coffee maker/machine due to overnighters. Once stayed awake so long that he forgot the letter “R”.

Owned a terrarium of Madagascar Hissing Cockroaches throughout college. He mourned each of them when his roommate’s iguana got into the tank.

Was a "beatnik" back in the day and still kinda is. Embraces and encourages modern counterculture as he himself was not given such acceptance in his youth. He has however shamefully eaten his old Lenny Bruce album.

Hasn’t actually aged physically since his transformation. He attributes this to the fact that certain athropods can’t age physically beyond maturity. Link is very jealous.

Has obtained more degrees while in captivity, as Monger allowed him access to research and learning materials. He has however had his allowances revoked for previous escape attempts/doomsday devices.

Does still enjoy human food, but the cockroach instinct of "eat detritus" tends to overrule his eating choices. Can’t cook either.

Ironically a terrible driver. The damages from previous drives has made Monger restrict him from operating even a razor scooter.

BOB:

Pretty much considers himself human. Was created by them, raised by one (Monger), and talks like one. Gets sad when he's reminded that no other humans are blue blobs like him.

Absorbed some dna from the scientists present at his "birth", leading to his eye, speech, and omnivorous diet.

Doesnt actually need to breathe (as he can just absorb oxygen through his mass) but the fact that humans Do means that BOB thinks he has to as well.

Shares some physical characteristics with tomatoes/nightshade plants, as he is technically half tomato. He refuses to eat tomatos for this very reason, considering it cannibalism.

Attracts garden pests looking for a tomato plant. This unwittingly makes BOB a pretty good bug zapper.

Still retains his "mental broadcast" ability from "BOB's Big Break" although at a more subtle level. He tends to parrot the things he accidentally "eavesdropped" on.

Is empathetic, and can tell when others aren't doing ok emotionally. Will flop down on someone who’s really sad to comfort them. No brain, only heart.

Best cook out of the monsters. If he doesn’t forget what he’s making at least.

"Whats a gender? Can I eat it?"

Insectosaurus:

Core body is that of a Japanese Silkmoth, although she ended up being spliced with other animals present on the island during her initial mutation; namely ants and ground squirrels.

Eats over a literal ton of mulberry leaves per day. Also enjoys oranges.

Secretly wishes to be more humanoid.

Was only able to pupate and transform due to physical trauma. It seems that her transformation was like a “power-up” that required her to be in geniune distress for it to activate.

First language is Japanese. She learned it from the intial recovery team, and later developed an understanding of English from years in Area 5X.

Goes into torpor in cold weather. Pretty much impossible to wake her up for missions during Winter, as she needs to “rev up” before becoming mobile.

Still very much Link’s best friend. Still enjoys sports, chicks, and beer.

Monger:

Full name is; Warren Rex Monger.

Is very protective of the monsters and will defend them to the death.

Pretty much raised BOB (as seen when BOB was a baby blob in “Night of the Living Carrots”), and considers him his “freaky gelatinous son”.

Has a reputation of being a “control-freak” due to his aggressive overseeing of the monsters’ containment. This toughness is partly because of incidents that occured without his knowledge. Lets just say some scientists have been wedgied/fired for running experiments on the monsters without Monger’s approval.

Has a very “Ron Swanson” emotional response and view of the world. Crying is acceptable only at funerals and at the Grand Canyon (if he hadn’t lost his tear ducts in the war).

Has been married multiple times. Will not confirm or deny if he is currently seeing anyone.

Invisible Man/TiM:

Legit got out but no one at Area 5X is sure how. He suffered a geniune medical emergency and disappeared after surgery. The other monsters were informed that he died from complications to deter them from getting escape ideas.

Is able to be detected in Infrared light. Dr Cockroach managed to rig up goggles to view TiM in case of injury and to foil pranks.

Was a scientist working on an invisibility potion for the military and used himself as a guinea pig. Hasn’t actually been able to replicate his results since - thinks the effect may have been caused by a genetic abnormality.

Dr Cockroach and him are massive rivals. Both actually met eachother pre-transformation through a CalTech expedition. This makes the pair one of few people that have seen the others human face.

Is 100% naked. Was forced to wear clothing once this was discovered.

A massive prankster and a cynic. Him and Link were a force to be reckoned with.

Has revisted the facility multiple times and has started a number of ghost stories.

Any additions are welcome! I proably have alot more to dump about. Might make one of the alien characters from the series

[heycasbutt]

Already Sinned

A/N: Who says you can’t have 2 series in progress and start a third? This is a smutty series, because it’s me, but there is some infidelity, pregnancy, angst, that sort of thing along the way. I hope you enjoy but don’t be discouraged if this isn’t your thing. And please feel free to let me know what you think!

There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage. Martin Luther

“Spencer. I’m sorry I can’t make it. I got held up at work, but I promise I will be home soon. I know things haven’t been the best. But I do love you. A lot.”

Spencer threw his phone on the gray duvet, frustration surged through his body. It was the 4th time in 2 weeks Maeve had cancelled on him with no more explanation than a soft spoken voicemail. But this was a wedding, you didn’t just show up to a wedding of an old college friend alone when you were married.

He eventually conceded. Steven had said there would be an open bar and any chance to drown his failing marriage in a tumbler of whiskey while dining on an array of microscopic hors d’eouvre was welcomed.

His black suit hugged his slim figure, it was the same suit he wore when he married Maeve. A distant memory now, they spent more time apart than they did together, pulled in opposite directions by the FBI and the University. His hair was tussled, just slightly, and his tie, as always, was a little crooked.

A backless red dress beckoned him to the bar from his perch on the edge of the dance floor. His drink wasn’t even half gone, yet he suddenly needed another one. Her eyes were large and innocent, yet whispered fuck me at the same time.

“And another of whatever he’s having for him,” she threw a smile over her shoulder and Spencer spluttered to keep his composure.

“And how do you know I even want another one?” Spencer smiled wryly and lifted his glass to his lips. The watered down liquor didn’t hold the burn and he had to keep from souring his face at the taste.

“Because you’re holding water, there my friend,” She laughed and lifted a glass of white wine to her plump red lips. She was intoxicating. He was drunk on her already and this would be one hangover he wouldn’t come to regret.

As the early evening bled into night, Spencer found himself oblivious to the goings on of the party around him. The twinkling lights of the mansion gave way to a sprawling garden as you led him away from it all.

“Y/N” You whispered against his lips as he pressed them to yours for what you hoped would be the first time of many.

“Excuse me?” Spencer laughed softly and laced his fingers behind your back, holding you in place.

“My name. It’s Y/N.” You repeated, a hand came up to cup the doctor’s angled jaw as you leaned in to brush your lips against his once more.

“I’m Spencer.” He smiled a megawatt smile, his long fingers danced up your exposed back. “Am I going to see you after this?” He leaned forward and whispered against the shell of your ear, his hot breath sending chills down your back despite the warm July night.

“I sure hope so.” Your fingers curled around the lapels of his suit coat, a soft moan escaped your lips as he laved your neck in kisses.

“Let’s get out of here,” His voice rumbled against your skin in the most delicious way. You wanted to say no, the rational side of you was saying no, but all you managed was a breathy affirmation as your fingers dragged through his tawny curls.

The door to your apartment banged against the wall as Spencer lifted you up, your lips desperate to explore every inch of your partner. His arousal was evident now if his pants weren’t indicative enough, the pleased grunts and groans that fell from his mouth sure let you know just how much he appreciated this.

“Bedroom?” You breathed out. Your hands grasped tightly onto his curls as he licked and sucked at the hollow of your throat.

“Point the way.” Spencer laughed softly against your neck as you gestured to the bedroom at the end of the hall.

“God you’re beautiful.” He breathed, laying you on the large bed in the middle of the room. You smiled softly, and Spencer kissed down your body, peeling your slinky red dress down with him.

“Like what you see?” You smirked down at the man lying on his stomach between your legs. A single piece of flimsy lace was the only barrier between your lover, and your most private of areas.

“Oh most definitely. There’s just one little problem.” You yelped in surprise as he ripped your panties in two, discarding them on the floor and leaving you wet and open for him.

“Fuck, that’s a pretty pussy. Can’t wait to feel that wrapped around my cock.” Spencer licked a broad stripe up your center, your back arched, and the most pornographic of moans slipped through your lips.

“Oh fuck, Spencer!” His tongue laved at your clit while he worked two fingers against your opening. You groaned, a few cuss words slipping amongst the sounds as his nimble fingers found the fleshy patch within you and began moving in a ‘come hither’ motion.

“God you’re so good,” You breathed while Spencer kissed up your body. He quickly divested himself of his pants and boxers, your mouth watered at the sight of him. He was lean but toned in all the right places. As though he had been sculpted by the gods themselves.

“Condom?” He slid the tip of his cock through your folds, the pleasure already blinding.

You shook your head and squeaked out “Pill, clean.” As he slid home inside you.

“Fuck, you’re so fucking tight, Y/N.” Spencer leaned down and took your lips in a kiss, he grabbed your ass and attempted to bury himself deeper inside of you.

You moaned against his lips, fingers dimpling in his shoulders, heels digging into his back, desperate to blur the lines between where he ended and you began. His kisses were frenzied, and sloppy, his hands roamed your body, like he was memorizing every single inch.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” Spencer whispered against the shell of your ear. His fingers had slid down your body and begun to circle your clit, sending the most delicious sensations from your head to your toes.

“I’m gonna cum, Spencer,” You gasped, digging your heels deeper into his back.

“Let go, baby,” He groaned, taking a single puckered nipple into his mouth and laving it gently with his tongue.

A familiar sensation bubbled up in your lower belly, your back arched, your eyes slammed shut, and your teeth clenched as a blinding orgasm washed over you. Spencer managed a few more thrusts before pulling out and finishing on your stomach.

Ever the perfect gentleman, Spencer reached over to your nightstand and grabbed a handful of tissues to begin cleaning you up.

The process of cleaning up took a minute as you stole kisses and laughed softly with each other. His curly hair was slicked down by a thin sheen of sweat covering his body.

“Well, that was something I’ve never done.” Spencer confessed, stripping off his shirt and sliding into bed next to you.

“Can’t say I’ve done that either.” You laughed breathlessly and snuggled into his chest. His heartbeat slowly lulled you into a dreamless slumber, his scent enveloped you comfortably, and you hoped this wasn’t just a one time thing. God, you hoped.

The morning sunlight played through Spencer’s curls as he sat up in bed, holding you close, whispering sweet nothings in your ear as you eased into the day.

“How’d you sleep?” He croaked, bending down and taking your lips in a kiss.

“Pretty good. Had some great sex before bed too.” You winked and laughed softly.

“Was this a one time thing?” You started “Orrr…?”

“It was a however long you’ll let me stick around and keep doing that kind of thing.” Spencer smiled softly. You could get used to this blissful domesticity. A stranger 12 hours ago, it now felt like you were in bed with an old friend.

The domesticity was broken by the shrill ring of Spencer’s phone. He reached down and fished it out of his pants, and sliding the screen to answer.

“Hello? …..Yes I’m fine, I just had a little too much to drink and so I stayed with a friend…... I’ll be home later…... Okay. Love you too. Bye,” He laid the device on the bedside table and crawled back in next to you.

“Ooh am I a dirty little secret?” You joked with a soft laugh.

“You’re dirty. But definitely not a secret,” Spencer grabbed your bottom lip between his teeth and tugged softly, a soft groan on your end accompanied the gesture.

“Who was that then? Roommate?”

“Kind of. It was my wife.”

[prorevenge]

Short my boyfriend $200+? Enjoy your divorce.

So this whole debacle started in my freshman year of college. I went to a religious college so there were a lot of really strict rules regarding curfew and punishments for not going to the mandatory worships, this comes into play later. Background on me: I am not a physically imposing young lady, just under 5 ft and 100 lbs soaking wet and wearing cinderblock shoes. At this time I had been recently dumped and so I was starting college practically alone as my ex and I were set to go to the same university but he dropped out to join military school. Before we start lets denote some names:

Me: is me of course Andy: is my dear boyfriend (now fiancé) Jess: one of my Best friends and roommate after the first quarter And finally the antagonist of the tale: Sam Not real names of course, and at the start of this we were all 18 we are all 24-25 now.

As this was a religious School, we had a sort of camp out in the week or two before classes started, it was meant to be a getting to know you kind of thing, and so we had things called “family groups”, I was a little freaked out, but in the group there was one loud, overly friendly girl named Sam. Sam was the same ethnicity as me and so we quickly bonded over a shared ethnic background and how similar we were, she had a boyfriend in the army and I lamented my single status and how my ex basically ditched me for the navy. She seemed perfect, sympathetic, social, and fun. I warmed up to our family group with the help of my new best friend. We had a great weekend, and got to know others in the group, including Jess. Jess was more quiet and disinterested, with a classic case of resting bitch face but eventually she warmed up to me and I to her. Sam didn’t really like them but you wouldn’t know it unless she told you.

The first sign of something off with her was during dinner, I was sitting with Jess and her friend from high school Andy. He and I really hit it off, but as my heart was still freshly broken I kept some boundaries up but agreed to go watch a movie when we got back from the trip. Immediately Sam pulled up a chair and was all over him, asking about his past, how he and Jess met, what he thought about her outfit, and on and on. I was a little miffed but just ate my burrito. For the rest of the trip Andy and I were hardly apart and Sam got more and more passive aggressive with me, bringing up my ex and how I was moving on too quickly. I believed her and cancelled my “date” with Andy, and said that I didn’t want him to just be a rebound. He was understanding and chill with just being friends which was a blessing for me, but seemingly not good enough for Sam. After the trip was over I decided to show them around the city since I was a local student. While the others put their stuff in their rooms Sam asked me to stay behind because she had to “confess” something to me. She started spewing some bs about how Andy had cornered her outside the cabin and was being a pervert and telling her how beautiful she was so on and so forth. I was skeptical and made it known, but her response was just “just looking out for ya girly.” By then the others came back and I just decided to ignore what she said and have a good time in the city. This was incident 1.

A couple weeks go by, Andy, Jess, and I became a little squad of sorts because all our schedules matched up, whereas finding time to hang out with Sam was more than difficult. This all came to a head when Jess and Andy planned a little trip to the local Benihana place and didn’t invite Sam. She found out via social media and flew off the handle. I had gone home for the weekend and when I came back on Monday I was greeted with drama, tears, and accusations. The gist of the situation is, the group didn’t invite Sam because she is vegetarian and has a lot of allergies, so it would be dangerous to even step foot in the Benihana, and in retaliation Sam took her “best friends” aka random girls from the dorm, horse back riding and posted a photo with the caption “better than Benihana”. (Incident 2)

Once again this is what I came back to and so things were pretty frosty. I asked for some backstory and apparently, it was work friends who invited Andy and Jess so it wasn’t even their place to invite someone else, and it wasn’t like she would be able to eat anything at the Benihana anyways so they literally didn’t even think they were being rude. According to Sam, they were purposefully excluding her and that no one likes her and that this was just like it was in high school. She didn’t have very many friends and we were just becoming privy to why exactly that was.

Incident 3 was the friendship bracelets. She ordered these semi-expensive bracelets for me and Jess but mysteriously Jess’s broke in the mail and the replacement would “totally come any day now”. Jess pretended not to be hurt but it obviously stung when she would fawn over our bracelets and how we are such great friends. Spoiler the bracelet never came.

Now I was still trying to smooth things over but it kept getting worse and worse, if I was hanging out with Andy or jess she wouldn’t speak to me, but would only talk shit when we were alone. During all of this Andy and I kept getting closer and eventually started dating but low-key cause the whole situation with Sam and we didn’t want to set her off. I know we were spineless back then.

Now for the catalyst for the revenge. She was a wanna-be youtuber, and wanted to do a holiday video. Andy is a film major but he doesn’t want anything to do with her after all her lies and petty behavior. But then she made an offer we couldn’t refuse, “I’ll give you $200 and pay for food” and for what should’ve been an hour or two of filming we were sold. I was set to manage the site, since that’s my personality is “get it done”, and he was in charge of filming. He worked so hard on it ya’ll, he story boarded, he made a script for her, he got all his equipment together. I was so proud of him. I contacted the diner where we were filming and got everything together and we were set.

Filming Day arrives and we get our hair and makeup done for the “actors” and “actresses” and we all get to the diner an hour before, at her insistence, and set up. She says she’ll be 30 minutes late and so we decide to eat after shooting some B-roll. Guess how long it took her and her “entourage” to arrive? 2 whole hours. We finally get filming and if you are counting we have been at the diner for 4 hours, pre-filming. We spend another 2 hours filming and we have to take after pics in our outfits and everything. Did she pay for our food? Nope. And she tells Andy “You got a big payday coming, you deserve more than 200 for today.” He’s happy cause he wanted to take me out for a nice date for the holiday but spoiler again, she didn’t pay up.

So a week or two goes by and it gets closer and closer to holiday and we already turned over all the footage we are just waiting for payment. Then came the excuses, “I don’t trust zelle.”, “I’m waiting for my auntie to pay me.”, “my aunts in the Caribbean right now and she doesn’t trust zelle either.” We kept hounding her for the money and the holiday came and went, she posted the video and stopped answering texts. Since we all lived together I confronted her and more excuses then she said give her two more weeks.

During those two weeks, she told everyone who would listen that she already paid us and that we were terrible people to try and extort her for more. Now at this point in the year, we are fed up with her, and Andy is ready to write the 200 off, he bitches to his smoking buddies and the smoking buddies get our side of the story out to the relatively small school and pretty soon she doesn’t have a leg to stand on. She gets nasty, texting me all this bs about how Andy is cheating on me and that I deserve better and screenshots of their conversations where he supposedly tells her how he’d rather not be committed. Now we had some commitment issues in the beginning, on both sides, but she tried to present these texts as recent, not stuff from months ago. The final straw was when she called me stupid and naive for staying in the relationship despite him being a greedy man whore.

Now I was going scorched earth, for some background on Sam. She was a chronic cheater, like get drunk at a party and give a guy a blowjob cheater, then go out the next weekend and do it again. She was also married, she and her husband got married right out of high school, which is typical of army guys in my experience. The ink wasn’t even dry on the marriage certificate, less than a year when she burned us. But I was someone she chose to confide in since she thought I was too stupid to see through her after all the shit she put us through. So I gathered evidence, all the cheated, the videos of her doing shit at parties, sexts with various guys, the drinking binges, and her shit talking her loving army boyfriend. I gathered all of this information for more than a year, I felt horrible for the guy but I needed a file that would damn her to legal hell.

D-day arrived when about a year and a half after I met her she told me that she thought her husband was cheating as when he was deployed she found a video on his phone of him and his buddy dancing on some girls in a club. Sam was livid, she was cursing and swearing she would take him for every cent in court for cheating on her. Never mind that she was blowing guys for fun every other weekend. I asked her if she had proof, and she said that proof doesn’t matter, they always believe the hurt wife.

I complied all my evidence and wrote a very long apology letter for waiting this long, and sent it anonymously. Sam didn’t return to school the next year and I kinda lost track of her. I got reminded when my fiancé showed me that terrible video we did for her, I confessed what I did and we social media stalked her accounts. She now posts a lot of “single and loving it” memes and she has a few vlogs talking about fake friends and how simple living is the best. I guess thats a consequence of loosing her luxurious “rich girl” lifestyle that her husbands family provided for her. Looking at her ex-husbands page he has a beautiful wife and a baby on the way, looking way happier than I’d ever see him.

TL;DR: So yeah, don’t be a bitch and short people 200 dollars. It'll cost you your husband, your cushy lifestyle, respect, and one year of nontransferable credits at an out the ass expensive school.

(source) (story by StraightTrade488)

[yuexuan]

Fiction Recommendation 14

September 5th is Zhong Yuan Jie (Ghost Day) in many parts of Asia and October 31st is the Western Halloween, I thought I’d dedicated this round of fiction recommendation to some of the supernatural and mysterious unique to Chinese (and other Asian) cultures. The comment section will contain a short synopsis of the novels, along with some of my own thoughts about the story. 

1. Daomu Biji 盗墓笔记 by Kennedy Xu 

Genre: Mystery, adventure, horror, suspense

Comment: Anyone following my blog knows I am a huge fan of Daomu. Along with Ghost Blows Out Light, both works were considered the pioneering novels that opened the tomb-raiding literature market in China. Daomu is told from a first-person perspective, detailing the adventures of Wu Xie as he visited tomb after tomb to unveil the mysteries that surround him, including that of his close friends and the role he played in the whole scheme of things. This is a highly suspenseful story spanning nine published books with two published sequels - Zang Hai Hua and Sha Hai. One of the highlights of the book is the first person narrative, which allows us to relate and engage with the protagonist, while collecting clues and solving mysteries with the character. 

2. XiongZhai Biji 凶宅笔记 by  贰十三

Genre: Mystery, horror, supernatural

Comment: Xiongzhai - a term applied to haunted houses with past history(ies) of death - are usually sold at very low market price. But where there’s money, there’s business. Jiang Shuo and his friend Qin YiHeng decided to buy these houses cheaply, exorcised then, then resold it at much higher market prices. The two friends work through a series of haunted houses, until Jiang Shuo started to suspect that there’s someone purposefully drawing him to different haunted houses. Also narrated through first-person, XiongZhai Biji explores an interesting ‘market’ and who knows, you might find a haunted house one day. 

3.  海岭荒城 by 罪化/王十一

Genre: BL, supernatural, horror *R18

Comment: Considered one of the classic BL horror stories out there -All reporter Tao wanted to do was interview CEO Ling and enter a contest with said interview. Instead, he was directed to a city designed specifically for movie sets. Granted, the city was a property of the Ling company...When Tao arrived, the city seemed abandoned. There are few, if any, tourists in that area except for a group of hired performers. CEO Ling Li thought that reporter Tao would fare no better than previous reporters, but to his surprise, Tao stayed within the city for more than one night and uncovered a series of mysteries related to the occult. Although plot-wise and character-wise the story is mediocre, but it contains very vivid descriptions of horrific scenes that send chills down my back. 

4.  都市探幽录 by  罪化/王十一

Genre: Mystery, supernatural

Comment: Another series of novel by ZuiHua. Reporter Xia Han and intern Fu Wei were invited to XiangXi Province to experience a river-rafting tour. What was definitely not included in the tour are a line of zombies passing by in the dead of night, a huge snake within the waters and red water bubbling within the last stall of the girl’s toilet...thank goodness Reporter Xia and his intern are familiar to these sightings, seeing as they publish their stories in a special newspaper called the ‘Occult Weekly’. There are four books and each book is a different short story, though interlinked loosely with one another. This title is the opposite of recommendation #3, it has a stronger plot and character setting, but contains less scare factors. 

5.  哇！今夜哪裡有鬼！by 黯然銷魂蛋

Genre: BL, supernatural/horror, humor *R15

Comment: He BiXue is a paranormal reality TV show producer, who happens to also have a tendency to attract the dead unwittingly. Enters Yin Jian, who is a Taoist the studio invited to help deal with the ghosts. From a girlfriend who got severed in half, to being trapped within dreams, to an ancient princess that came back to life, it seems that this reality TV show is definitely ‘cursed’. This story has an interesting setting and is relatable especially for those who watch Taiwanese reality shows. My critique is that it feels like the author hasn't got a strong grip on the characters' personalities, which changes quite frequently throughout the book.

6.  天師執位Ⅰ by  樊落

Genre: BL, supernatural, *R15

Comment:  Nie XiFeng's first impression of Zhang Xuan is as bad as bad can be. After almost dying as a result of listening to the words of a con man posing as a taoist, he swore to never trust another taoist again. In comes Zhang Xuan, who works in his company, but also works a self-acclaimed taoist. Together they solved the mysteries around them -- albeit while fighting with each other -- and just when Nie XiFeng fell in love with Zhang Xuan, he learned that the latter might have some hidden agenda. There are several books in this series, each focusing on a different mystery that involves the supernatural. Plot-wise it can seem to drag a bit in some parts, but overall it’s not bad, plus the ending is surprising. 

7.  見鬼鮮花店 by  雲過是非 Genre: BL, supernatural, humor *R15

Comment: In this day and age, the Western and Oriental supernatural beings have developed friendly ties. Unfortunately, just as prices are increasing in the living world, the prices of items in hell are skyrocketing, especially with less and less people being superstitious these days. The supernaturals have no choice but to walk the modern route and purchase things online. Shu Jiu is a flower shop owner who repeatedly received requests from strange customers. What’s more, he learned that there are four ghosts inside his shop. Really humorous story with cute characters. It's a bit sad though that the ending was very rushed (basically the author spent over 40 chapters to develop a mystery and everything got solved in one ._.) But still, a really nice read.

8. 陰書  by 夜半來敲鍾  Genre: Horror, supernatural, BL **R18

Comment: A group of teenagers in love with all things supernatural decided to visit a haunted house to explore, unwittingly finding a shredded corpse. Ever since then, one by one the teenagers disappeared, who would be next? And how do they break the cycle? I thought that out of all the horror stories, this author’s works are definitely more bone-chilling than the others. 

9.  校園七怪談 by  夜半來敲鍾

Genre: Horror, supernatural, BL

Comment: Lin Feng recently transferred to a new school.  Ever since he transferred, strange happenings abound. The soft sigh in the middle of the night, the footsteps outside the room door, his roommate's haunted looks...When will things end? This story builds on the popular concept of ‘seven strange happenings’ in Asian schools - the strange happenings often refer to unexplained phenomenons that are experienced by multiple students. 

10.  小镇 by dnax

Genre: BL, adventure, suspense

Comment:  Fu En accidentally entered a town in which no one leaves. Here, townsfolk are happy and everyone had their own supernatural powers...except there's a price to using the powers and people aren't as content as they seem. He quickly discovers the loopholes in the 'rules' of the town, along with the twisted mindset of some of the inhabitants. A really bizarre story, but highly suspenseful and really image-evoking.

11.  解忧杂货店 by  东野圭吾

Genre: Supernatural, comfort

Comment:  All the worries and troubles, let this shop help you resolve them. There is a small shop by a corner of the roadside, as long as you write down your worries and place it within its letterbox, you will get an answer in the milkbox located behind the store on the second day. A series of worries, with prophetic-like answers. Very heart-warming and touching.

12.  我準是在地獄 by  YY的劣迹

Genre: Mystery, **R (rated for murder and violence)

Comment: Ning Xiao is just like any other murder mystery author. One night he was mugged but when he found the police at his door next day accusing him for the murder of the mugger, things took a twist. Consecutive murders that follow the plot of his stories, repressed memories and a police with a suspicious background, just who is behind all of these murders? A rabid fan? Ning Xiao’s split personality? Or perhaps the ‘police’...? Even though the story was marked as BL by others, I really think that there's no romantic relationship between the two protagonists - most of the story is focused on the murder mystery plotline. 

13.  谋杀官员1：逻辑王子的演绎 by  紫金陈

Genre: Mystery

Comment: Graduated from Ze Da University's math department, Xu Ce is also known as the prince of logic. Later he won a scholarship to support a PhD study in psychology. However, upon hearing his mother's death, he returned to China. On the other hand, his friend - Gao Dong - also known for his specialty in crimonology, encountered numerous murder cases of government officers. Could Gao Dong resolved these cases? And what does it have to do with Xu Ce? 

14.  推理之王·坏小孩 by  紫金陈

Genre: Mystery

Comment: Four years into their marriage, Xujing had an affair and wanted a divorce. Her husband, Zhang DongShen realized that he would be left with nothing should the divorce occur, and there is only one way out. On the pretense of taking her parents out for a trip, he plotted a murder. Everything should have been perfect. Except that three children became witnesses to the murder, and they are anything but innocent.

15.  推理之王·无证之罪 by  紫金陈

Genre: Mystery

Comment: What if someone claims that he conducted murders to save another person, would you believe their intention? Behind the crimes lie a heart filled with anger and love. A high-class murderer versus a math teacher, both of which are equally skilled, who would win in this chase?

16. 都市夜歸人 by 朱砂

Genre; Mystery, supernatural, BL **R18

Comment: As a sniper, Chen Gu knew his eyesight is superb, just not to the extent that he can see the supernaturals...But how is it that he hadn't notice this strange phenomenon before? Of course, without a certain Mr. Zhong's mentioning, he wouldn't have noticed the strange things around him either. Case after case of supernatural phenomenon appeared, and it is up to the duo to resolve them. However things are more complicated than they expected, - there's still an avenging ghost-human out there trying to revive his dead wife by breaking all the Taoist rules that one can phantom. The author has quite an extensive knowledge of different mythologies and legends. I recommend reading the actual text first before reading the prequel (the prequel was rather dark and slow-paced. Honestly I couldn’t finished it).

[prorevenge]

Short my Boyfriend $200+? Enjoy Your Divorce

Traditional LTL and FTP, forgive me for any formatting or grammar errors. Hope y’all get a kick out of this. It’s a SUPER long one. A lot of people know I tumblr so some details have been changed but overall the story is as accurate as can be.

So this whole debacle started in my freshman year of college. I went to a religious college so there were a lot of really strict rules regarding curfew and punishments for not going to the mandatory worships, this comes into play later. Background on me: I am not a physically imposing young lady, just under 5 ft and 100 lbs soaking wet and wearing cinderblock shoes. At this time I had been recently dumped and so I was starting college practically alone as my ex and I were set to go to the same university but he dropped out to join military school. Before we start lets denote some names:

Me: is me of course Andy: is my dear boyfriend (now fiancé) Jess: one of my Best friends and roommate after the first quarter And finally the antagonist of the tale: Sam Not real names of course, and at the start of this we were all 18 we are all 24-25 now.

As this was a religious School, we had a sort of camp out in the week or two before classes started, it was meant to be a getting to know you kind of thing, and so we had things called “family groups”, I was a little freaked out, but in the group there was one loud, overly friendly girl named Sam. Sam was the same ethnicity as me and so we quickly bonded over a shared ethnic background and how similar we were, she had a boyfriend in the army and I lamented my single status and how my ex basically ditched me for the navy. She seemed perfect, sympathetic, social, and fun. I warmed up to our family group with the help of my new best friend. We had a great weekend, and got to know others in the group, including Jess. Jess was more quiet and disinterested, with a classic case of resting bitch face but eventually she warmed up to me and I to her. Sam didn’t really like them but you wouldn’t know it unless she told you.

The first sign of something off with her was during dinner, I was sitting with Jess and her friend from high school Andy. He and I really hit it off, but as my heart was still freshly broken I kept some boundaries up but agreed to go watch a movie when we got back from the trip. Immediately Sam pulled up a chair and was all over him, asking about his past, how he and Jess met, what he thought about her outfit, and on and on. I was a little miffed but just ate my burrito. For the rest of the trip Andy and I were hardly apart and Sam got more and more passive aggressive with me, bringing up my ex and how I was moving on too quickly. I believed her and cancelled my “date” with Andy, and said that I didn’t want him to just be a rebound. He was understanding and chill with just being friends which was a blessing for me, but seemingly not good enough for Sam. After the trip was over I decided to show them around the city since I was a local student. While the others put their stuff in their rooms Sam asked me to stay behind because she had to “confess” something to me. She started spewing some bs about how Andy had cornered her outside the cabin and was being a pervert and telling her how beautiful she was so on and so forth. I was skeptical and made it known, but her response was just “just looking out for ya girly.” By then the others came back and I just decided to ignore what she said and have a good time in the city. This was incident 1.

A couple weeks go by, Andy, Jess, and I became a little squad of sorts because all our schedules matched up, whereas finding time to hang out with Sam was more than difficult. This all came to a head when Jess and Andy planned a little trip to the local Benihana place and didn’t invite Sam. She found out via social media and flew off the handle. I had gone home for the weekend and when I came back on Monday I was greeted with drama, tears, and accusations. The gist of the situation is, the group didn’t invite Sam because she is vegetarian and has a lot of allergies, so it would be dangerous to even step foot in the Benihana, and in retaliation Sam took her “best friends” aka random girls from the dorm, horse back riding and posted a photo with the caption “better than Benihana”. (Incident 2)

Once again this is what I came back to and so things were pretty frosty. I asked for some backstory and apparently, it was work friends who invited Andy and Jess so it wasn’t even their place to invite someone else, and it wasn’t like she would be able to eat anything at the Benihana anyways so they literally didn’t even think they were being rude. According to Sam, they were purposefully excluding her and that no one likes her and that this was just like it was in high school. She didn’t have very many friends and we were just becoming privy to why exactly that was.

Incident 3 was the friendship bracelets. She ordered these semi-expensive bracelets for me and Jess but mysteriously Jess’s broke in the mail and the replacement would “totally come any day now”. Jess pretended not to be hurt but it obviously stung when she would fawn over our bracelets and how we are such great friends. Spoiler the bracelet never came.

Now I was still trying to smooth things over but it kept getting worse and worse, if I was hanging out with Andy or jess she wouldn’t speak to me, but would only talk shit when we were alone. During all of this Andy and I kept getting closer and eventually started dating but low-key cause the whole situation with Sam and we didn’t want to set her off. I know we were spineless back then.

Now for the catalyst for the revenge. She was a wanna-be youtuber, and wanted to do a holiday video. Andy is a film major but he doesn’t want anything to do with her after all her lies and petty behavior. But then she made an offer we couldn’t refuse, “I’ll give you $200 and pay for food” and for what should’ve been an hour or two of filming we were sold. I was set to manage the site, since that’s my personality is “get it done”, and he was in charge of filming. He worked so hard on it ya’ll, he story boarded, he made a script for her, he got all his equipment together. I was so proud of him. I contacted the diner where we were filming and got everything together and we were set.

Filming Day arrives and we get our hair and makeup done for the “actors” and “actresses” and we all get to the diner an hour before, at her insistence, and set up. She says she’ll be 30 minutes late and so we decide to eat after shooting some B-roll. Guess how long it took her and her “entourage” to arrive? 2 whole hours. We finally get filming and if you are counting we have been at the diner for 4 hours, pre-filming. We spend another 2 hours filming and we have to take after pics in our outfits and everything. Did she pay for our food? Nope. And she tells Andy “You got a big payday coming, you deserve more than 200 for today.” He’s happy cause he wanted to take me out for a nice date for the holiday but spoiler again, she didn’t pay up.

So a week or two goes by and it gets closer and closer to holiday and we already turned over all the footage we are just waiting for payment. Then came the excuses, “I don’t trust zelle.”, “I’m waiting for my auntie to pay me.”, “my aunts in the Caribbean right now and she doesn’t trust zelle either.” We kept hounding her for the money and the holiday came and went, she posted the video and stopped answering texts. Since we all lived together I confronted her and more excuses then she said give her two more weeks.

During those two weeks, she told everyone who would listen that she already paid us and that we were terrible people to try and extort her for more. Now at this point in the year, we are fed up with her, and Andy is ready to write the 200 off, he bitches to his smoking buddies and the smoking buddies get our side of the story out to the relatively small school and pretty soon she doesn’t have a leg to stand on. She gets nasty, texting me all this bs about how Andy is cheating on me and that I deserve better and screenshots of their conversations where he supposedly tells her how he’d rather not be committed. Now we had some commitment issues in the beginning, on both sides, but she tried to present these texts as recent, not stuff from months ago. The final straw was when she called me stupid and naive for staying in the relationship despite him being a greedy man whore.

Now I was going scorched earth, for some background on Sam. She was a chronic cheater, like get drunk at a party and give a guy a blowjob cheater, then go out the next weekend and do it again. She was also married, she and her husband got married right out of high school, which is typical of army guys in my experience. The ink wasn’t even dry on the marriage certificate, less than a year when she burned us. But I was someone she chose to confide in since she thought I was too stupid to see through her after all the shit she put us through. So I gathered evidence, all the cheated, the videos of her doing shit at parties, sexts with various guys, the drinking binges, and her shit talking her loving army boyfriend. I gathered all of this information for more than a year, I felt horrible for the guy but I needed a file that would damn her to legal hell.

D-day arrived when about a year and a half after I met her she told me that she thought her husband was cheating as when he was deployed she found a video on his phone of him and his buddy dancing on some girls in a club. Sam was livid, she was cursing and swearing she would take him for every cent in court for cheating on her. Never mind that she was blowing guys for fun every other weekend. I asked her if she had proof, and she said that proof doesn’t matter, they always believe the hurt wife.

I complied all my evidence and wrote a very long apology letter for waiting this long, and sent it anonymously. Sam didn’t return to school the next year and I kinda lost track of her. I got reminded when my fiancé showed me that terrible video we did for her, I confessed what I did and we social media stalked her accounts. She now posts a lot of “single and loving it” memes and she has a few vlogs talking about fake friends and how simple living is the best. I guess thats a consequence of loosing her luxurious “rich girl” lifestyle that her husbands family provided for her. Looking at her ex-husbands page he has a beautiful wife and a baby on the way, looking way happier than I’d ever see him.

TL;DR: So yeah, don’t be a bitch and short people 200 dollars. It'll cost you your husband, your cushy lifestyle, respect, and one year of nontransferable credits at an out the ass expensive school.

(source) (story by traightTrade488)