#Which I was DELIGHTED by. It's perfect
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I've been having a delightful time stumbling over my emojis being used in random servers, so here's more
#It's seriously so funny to see an emote of mine in random conversation from a private server#emojis#art#rain world#Some people went even farther and apparently started using other art of mine as emotes#Which is fine but absolutely buck wild to stumble over#Since some of the art they chose is literally wip versions of my current pfp#??? Sure I guess 😂#rw survivor#rw monk#rw saint#spearmaster#Most of these were requests. The rest were just the emojis I use the most turned into scugs lol#You get to decide which was which lmfaoooo#Also here's some lore: a while back I made 'hunterwheeze'#and the bit was everyone liked it so much they wanted it in the server#So I said bet and threw a bunch of emotes to the staff to hear their thoughts#And way more than I thought got added!#Except for hunterwheeze 🤣🤣🤣#Instead they chose a super edited screenshot of some animation frame I made a few months ago I added last minute for giggles#Which I was DELIGHTED by. It's perfect#Also the only instance of the emote since it's technically not on this blog 😉 not transparent anyway#Oh and here's my favorite 'wild' emotes I've found:#1) that person that dmed me to reveal there was an animated emote for every variation of rivulets face I made that one time#(I was not allowed to join the server)#2) discovering an emote has been in use for months in a server swathed in drama and in the throes of being orchestized from the community#3) that one nightcat-saint emote appearing on a random server announcement (it's so niche I was astounded anyone used it lmfao)#Most sightings are totally benign but these were just hilarious
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I love how Gerald was trying to keep Shadow from spoiling anything about the future meanwhile literally everything Shadow says and does around Maria is the biggest death flag ever
#in fairness i’m sure both past robotniks just assumed her illness would be what killed her h a#sxsg#sxsg spoilers#sonic x shadow generations#shadow the hedgehog#maria robotnik#ark siblings#sonic#comic#my art#doodles#so this was pretty much entirely done 24 hours ago#but ironically was distracted from posting earlier by playing sxsg#and then watching snapcube play it cause her delight is addicting#i’m missing 2 chests and 2 bolts and I wanna see if I can pull it off without a guide haha#anyways now I’m thinking about the fact that maria and gerald probably went back to their time assuming maria would die of her sickness#and how that would change their respective behaviors#i bet gerald would be holding out that maria would still live a bit longer#just cause shadow inadvertently revealed he’s from at least 50 years in the future due to having met black doom before#(which rewatching cutscenes to remember this quote he Did try to play off a little bit with some sort of#‘oh what do you think the alien squid meant by ’this time i’ll beat you’ that’s so crazy’ comment)#so hey maybe it wasn’t a perfect cure but she managed to live another 10-20 years at least?#all the more reason to press harder surely!#meanwhile maria is coming to terms with her mortality at age 14 or whatever she is#frankly I bet she came to terms with it long ago the way she seems to be written#okay back to snapcube
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I have a particular type of issue when writing fic that I have a very hard time directly contradicting canon without an explanation and the consequence of that is that I'm like "I know Vader snapped Fox's neck in that one comic but it is technically possible to both survive a broken neck and survive a broken neck without paralysis though it will likely never give you full range of motion again." And thus the utterly absurd detail of my Fox lives headcanon is that Fox lives but also has Batman neck for the rest of his life.
#me writing a potentially angsty scene with Fox post o66 while a portion of my mind is just replaying a video#of someone complaining about sleeping funny and getting batman neck on loop#which gives a certain mood to the writing process I gotta say#anyway#tcw#commander Fox#listen its still not a perfect explanation but it does give me some level of delight#between this and the Hurdy Gurdy fic I wrote back in the day I truly just give my silliest crack aus and headcanons to the angstiest soldier
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Thinking about how I've previously written on my blog about David having a thing for men who are thiccer/bigger than he is, and then this answer of his from an interview in the Guardian in 1999, and, well...
(Also, for those who may not know, a "Lonely Hearts" ad is a personal ad, or what people did before dating apps existed...)

#david tennant#soft scottish hipster gigolo#michael sheen#welsh seduction machine#it's interesting as well that he doesn't specify a gender in his answer#which is delightful#and i love that Michael is both his emotional support pet and his big Welsh bear#they are perfect together your honor#david is lowkey bi and michael is highkey bi#also David recreationally kisses men like it's going out of style#i'm just saying#this man is a bi disaster and i love him#ineffable lovers#discourse
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Do you have any more ideas about the dead dove vampire!dickxtim au you wrote a while ago? It's lived in my head ever since and I'd love to know more.
first of all thank you so much that's so sweet! second of all, i have SO many ideas you have no idea. that fic ate at my brain for like a month before i found the time to write it so i had plenty of ideas i didn't fully explore. i'm adding a read more just bc. that was one of my more fucked up fics so i don't want to subject anyone to a necro kink jumpscare
so one of the big ideas i've thought about with that fic is Tim dealing with the aftermath of it, right. bc he's of course going to hide it from everyone. the Batfam all just neds to hold onto the hope that they can save Dick somehow, and knowing what Dick did would kill any lingering hope that there's anything left of Dick Grayson in the walking husk that he's become. so Tim has to deal with the worst of it alone, probably not even mentioning he ran into Dick.
the fun part tho is that above everything else, Tim wouldn't be able to let go of Dick's comment about fantasizing about Tim before being a vampire. Tim knows the comment was made just to get in his head, but that doesn't stop it from working. he spends hours pouring over old footage of him and Dick training, hanging out, on patrol, anything he can find. just to like. try to find evidence of Dick's gaze lingering. it eats Tim alive not knowing one way or the other if it was a lie. if it's true, at least it makes it easier for Tim to move on from the memory of Dick. but not knowing is worse. and he never finds anything that satiates the question so like. that'd destroy Tim the most. (the real answer is that Dick genuinely didn't feel attraction to Tim before being a vampire, *but* Dick is convinced he did bc being a vampire fucked him up so badly that he's become his own unreliable narrator. so it's both true and untrue, and in the end, it doesn't matter either way bc Tim is fucked up by the thought of it and even if they "fixed" Dick by curing him, i think Dick's romantic feelings would linger in the horror of what he did.)
i'm really just. in love with Dick's feelings toward Tim in the fic. the most difficult part of the fic was figuring out how to end it, bc sure as a sexual fantasy Dick is obsessed with killing Tim, but he's also deeply in love with Tim, so it's difficult to follow through on. Dick wants to make Tim a vampire more than anything, but he is genuinely worried about how well it'd take for Tim. the fic doesn't really go into who's on Dick's side as a vampire, but i personally believe he's turned most of the Titans. probably some of his own rogues as well, i could see him turning Slade. i can't explain why, those are just the vibes.
it is important to me just how much of Dick's feelings for Tim are based in him not wanting Tim to live under Bruce's thumb. like the whole vampire brain has convinced Dick that Bruce is somehow the villain in this, and it was Bruce's control keeping Dick from being the person he wanted to be. it's a very warped reality and if i continued the fic i'd love for the second part to be from Dick's perspective just to have fun with the unreliable narrator of it.
back to the porn tho. Dick would seek TIm out again. probably in Tim's own apartment, just bc he wants to destroy every safe space Tim has. getting into Tim's head is an important part of breaking TIm down. the fear of Tim fighting back against being a vampire is one that Dick is trying to figure out how to manage and his current plan is to break Tim mentally. it's why he brings up wanting to sleep with TIm before being a vampire. he *knows* it's gonna fuck up Tim. and the more he puts these little cracks in Tim's psyche, the more he's sure he's breaking Tim down enough to be able to turn him. so going to Tim's apartment and proving that at any point, Dick can easily find Tim and fuck him. always holding the threat of killing Tim over his head. and Dick knows Tim didn't tell anyone when days pass after their first meeting and no Bat comes after him so like. Dick really just pushes the limits. i think he would brand Tim just bc he can. i also got a comment on the fic that mentioned Dick stabbing Tim and fucking the wound and i canNOT get that image out of my head either-
and the necro/snuff kink just. Dick playing the long game, so it takes maybe months of stalking Tim, going after him. sometimes he fucks Tim, sometimes he just fights and taunts him. and all the talk about killing Tim fucks with Tim's head a little bit. i think it'd be fun if it killed Tim's ability to have vanilla/normal sex with someone else, like Kon. it's hard for Tim to understand anyone being attracted to him in a way that doesn't involve him being a dead body. i don't think he develops the kink fully, but he does end up convincing himself being a corpse is the only way he's attractive bc of all the things Dick has said to him. it all plays into Dick psychologically breaking Tim.
i am a lover of fucked up/unhappy endings so. for me. the ending would be Dick following through on his plan to kill Tim and turn him. it'd take months for Dick to work up the courage bc TIm was absolutely right when he pointed out that Dick was too scared to actually follow through on his fantasy. Dick tries, multiple times. he convinces himself no less than five times that this is going to be the one. this'll be the time he really does it. but just as Tim starts to die, Dick panics. i think it's especially fun if once Dick even gives Tim CPR bc of his cold feet. so Tim does "die" for a second and has to brutally come back while Dick is buried inside of him.
but when Dick does it, his fears manifest in that Tim does *not* take being a vampire well. he's constantly trying to kill himself (in the time it takes for Dick to break Tim, Tim probably does figure out what poison can kill a vampire) and Dick ends up having to keep Tim locked up so Tim doesn't kill himself. would truly love to try to write Tim as mentally shattered as possible. part of him loves Dick, but he's fighting himself so hard he's not even sure if it's the vampire side that loves Dick or the human side. he's kept like a human pet, bc Dick is convinced he'll get Tim to accept it sooner or later. just a very fun, very fucked up sort of ending. i say this about all the fics i write but this one specifically i do *really* want to continue someday. i know exactly the direction i'd take it, and it could turn into a pretty long fic with a lot of fucked up porn, a lot of unrequited love, and an eventual mind break for Tim.
#necrotic answerings#kindly praise#your dream turned into a nightmare when i crawled inside it#batcest#dicktim#dead dove do not eat#seriously this is a VERY dead dove if you have not read the fic be warned about reading this post lkjhklkh#shock of shock. the person with necrotic in their username. likes necro shit in fanfic.#i might explore necro kink in other ships#i've got a fucked up ra's/tim brainworm where ra's kills tim and brings him back to life with the pit. over and over.#waiting until he 'perfects' tim#(all while fucking him. obviously.)#anyway yeah i coudl easily turn this fic into like. at least 50k of fucked up shit.#which is funny bc when i wrote it i was SO nervous about posting it#i genuinely almost didn't post it. my partner can attest to this.#but i'm delighted it found it's niche.#necro freaks unite#i should mark this post mature. i will not.#you can tell i have a LOT of thoughts. i thought so much of this fic out that didn't actually end up in the text#some of it was just bc i couldn't include it from tim's pov#and some of it i did want to leave up to the reader#such as whether you believe dick had a crush on tim beforehand#in my head the answer is no but i think it's also fun if you believe he did#so i welcome that interpretation
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The Substance was easily one of the best movies of the year imo… loved the directing, the acting, the writing, the costumes, the cinematography (all those stark angles…), the outdoor shots, the INTERIORS… the way men were written and visually filmed, the way we don’t stay in a room after the main character leaves just so we can hear what everyone else thinks about her - it is HER narrative - I fucking love women directing horror esp. body horror. This is not even to mention the anti-cosmetic modification/injection/surgery themes which are… 😳 Universal was scared to release this film and backed out!!!! GO SEE THIS (but be warned it’s Extremely gory - all I’ll say is haters of excessive CGI in horror will NOT be disappointed in the creativity on display here)
#there’s something here for all women as well as for anyone whos tried to carve a new self out.#i think its incredibly apt#i probably dont need to explain to anyone why this is incredibly personal to me#like it could be a metaphor for multiple ways i nearly physically destroyed myself in pursuit of the Perfect#i cried so many times in the theatre lol#i will say it was odd to hear outrageous male audience laughter at some points but it IS darkly comedic and i laughed many times#anyway this movies thesis is in some ways the opposite of the t v glow shit. which oh it just delights me.#i did think some of the visual messaging was heavyhanded. however.. the wider audience frankly needs it :/#i saw way too many ppl reviewing it on tumblr who thought the MOVIE was mean spirited because antagonists r mean to some of the characters#so like. you can imagine how much the direct visual thesis went right over their head lol
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Killing myself a thousand times over. Do I want the setting of Good Intentions to be past based (fantasy greece meets the industrial revolution) or futuristic (fantasy greece meets itself after a stupidly ambiguous amount of years)
#notnow#good intentions#see the thing is. im coming to realize that good intentions has a lot to do with energy/creating forms of energy#which situates its best two setting options either at the industrial revolution (for self explanatory reasons) or in a far off future (wher#maybe all established energy forms are getting fucked and new alternatives need to be found)#i do sort of want like. an older fantasy feel for the work hence my leaning towards industrial revolution. also bc thatd set the sequel in#the early 20th century which would just delight me overall#whereas with a timeskip like that in an already futuristic setting its like. okay. how much further can i take it / how can i meaningfully#actually show the impacts the findings of the first book have had on society at large#also some of the jobs and overall vibe of good intentions calls back to an older time ie niovi's mom singing moirologia#but at the same time. i shant lie. trying to correlate the overall vibe of the industrial revolution on what is essentially greece#(who actively did not have an industrial revolution on that scale due to the 600~ years of ottoman everything)#is proving a little hard. as is serrating what would be hashtag greek in that period from what would be turkish when today obviously its al#so intertwined. but in fantasy greece that occupation simply didnt happen which is lending itself a bit weird to translating traditions#and such. at least in a futuristic setting a lot of this history would be a given and i could move ahead from ot#*it even.#and maybe tie the history into a perfect loop of like.. yk when things go so far into the future they begin to revert into the past etc#if i did future though fantasy greece would have to take on a bit more of a 1:1 role in its correlation to greece. as opposed to#the industrial revolution where it primarily relies on greek aesthetics but that i can play around in lotr style#. this is essentially becoming a matter of me trying to decide if i should style my book's setting after lotr or the locked tomb i am comin#to realize. right.#at least in the future hess would get to smoke which she deserves. but at the same time nothing about her place in her society would pack#the same punch. unless her corner of the society was more obsessed with nationalistic preservation and thus more old fashioned? but ugh#if i keep my current setting (place divided into four parts) and place it in the future i worry it starts giving divergence#head in my actual stupid fucking hands. i need to lock in#its going to take me a william years to introduce this project again the way we are going#also ignore the typos in this rant my tags refused to cooperate on all fronts
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actually there's no need to make this assignment any more complicated than it already is. horatio vs patroclus 'the lovers' epilogue' short story from 2021 revamped now ok?
#i have to do 7k words (4k creative 3k critical) and my extension isnt for as long as id like. my initial project is fun but im not in a#headspace rn to be able to do it justice and im needlessly panicking about it being perfect. i think it might be best to work with smth i#already have the groundwork for in the kind of layout i work best in (two characters yapping with minimum external description)#i stopped it in 2021ish because i found it a bit too fanfic-y for my tastes but. happy 2025 this is on cambridge for letting me in.#stay tuned :)#notnow#and tbf. fanficness aside. i was onto smth insofar as the actual foils went... horatio who resents patroclus being associated with him from#the moment he didnt actually have to deal with the aftermath of losing someone and got to simply 'jumpstart' the action instead#patroclus got to do the easy thing (die). horatio has to carry the epilogue#and yet theyre both often positioned as respective parallels/classical lovers in popular discourse. which i think is very fascinating#and comes with delightful interpersonal crossover implications#anyway. you can also tell this idea was old because i was still writing about men
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Judy in The Santa Clause: Children don't need to see this place to know it exists. They just...know.
Me, who has been learning about St. John Henry Newman: Ah, I see. They have real assent without notional assent.
#the santa clause#apologia pro vita sua#(can i say just how delighted i am to tag something with both those things?)#(as i tiptoe into the shallowest waters of philosophy this is the only kind of thing i want to do with it)#(now i just sit back and wait for people to tell me how i got these concepts wrong)#(literally all i had was a couple bishop barron videos that basically summarized them as)#('belief that comes from convincing logical arguments')#(and 'belief that leads to truly internalizing and acting on these beliefs even if there isn't perfect logical proof')#(which seems to fit well enough for my off-the-cuff observation about cinematic masterpiece 'the santa clause')
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great news, folks, my professor told me I have the power to be a menace to society and then gave me full points for an analysis in which I took a 300 word detour to explain Goncharov. I'm having the time of my fucking life.
#megs vs mlis#in my defense the goncharov analysis was actually the PERFECT case study for what i was analyzing.#god what a time goncharov was. fought in the war on misinformation on the side of the misinformation.#anyway those were not his exact words and it was not related to my goncharov analysis but it was VERY funny okay#dude told me unprompted ten minutes after first face to face meeting that my skillset is capable of shaping the fabric of society. buckwild.#it was actually delightful. wizard hours honestly.#getting a good grade in grad school which is both— wait.
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Scribble collecshun
#sham's art#shamsbabs#iliana#enya#myst#perrine#ulster#wicker#tobias#getting some practice in and trying to make it a lil loose#it looks better the less i try to make it perfect which is delightful and annoying to me#but i digress#this is a mix of me wanting to draw some of my gorls and making news ocs#as per the usual tbh#anyway back to the grind whatever crops up next is probably something I put off finishing#kingdom hearts oc#dislyte oc#yaelokre oc#digital doodles
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okay last bbvrai post of the night: I'm so glad members of the crew that didn't have speaking roles in hlvrai got to have roles in tonight's stream. Erarg stole the damn show, Trog as Saul was an incredible choice, Mira's brief scenes on screen had me cackling, and Lauren's whole vibe was hilarious. I'm so glad this was something the whole crew could get in on
#rtvs#everyone on the crew is so funny so im glad so many people got some time in the spotlight#when i realized jesse was erarg i was DELIGHTED#because he's so fuckin funny but doesn't get to be in the spotlight often#i couldnt even tell it was mira at first with her two bits because she was going so hard with the voices#which made it even better when she laughed and i realized who it was#on the flip side. lauren just doing her normal voice was hysterical#the lightsaber bit had me sobbing#and trog as saul was just. the perfect choice. his delivery never missed. he's so funny#anyway. amazing stream#i can't wait to see it edited down bc that was a TRIP#i can't believe i watched all of breaking bad in five hours!
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do you ship sirius and remus with someone else? and if so, with whom?
i personally do not!! 💕💕 i am monogamous to my absolute core & unfortunately that has projected itself into this very specific and stupid thing where i can’t read either of them being with other people without feeling nauseous 💕���✨
#u ask tortoise answers#anon#the only exception here is wolfstarbucks SOMETIMES#and i’m very picky about it#in my perfect world sirius & remus r soulmates forever and ever and nothing bad ever happens to either of them#without spoilers for anyone who hasn’t read it:#the first time i read Just What the Doctor Ordered by WrappedUp#which is absolutely delightful by the way#i almost threw up#like i’m being fr#my brain is mildly traumatized and stupid as fuck
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me @ me: hey don't cry. the fact that blue will just. look at zero (he likes looking at zero :) ) and completely lose his train of thought about anything else is literally canon. okay?
#we have to claw on to what we have in this fucked up world of ours lest despair claim our souls. and I do have this#campaign star wars#minister blue#agent zero#zeblue#so funny that his plans for world domination literally just go out of his head with one glance zero-wards fhsjakfhsd#plots forgotten. schemes abandoned. no thoughts. head empty. zero pretty#(still makes me feel insane that that's the word he uses in the metalorn arc btw. 'as long as you look pretty'.#normal things to tell your terrifying hired killer as he lets you move him around to get the perfect framing for a propaganda shoot#blue there's something so wrong with you (delighted). tbf having one of the coolest dudes in the galaxy around#during some of the most formative years for your sexuality and also regularly receiving cat memes from him WOULD#do some things to you even if your brain had been somewhat normal at the outset. which I do not believe for a second needless to say)#local man who has not quite figured out what sex is yet gently surprised to find out what the feeling he gets#watching hired assassin kill people for him is all about exactly fhsdkjfhas
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i love you tears of the kingdom :)
#this weekend i was talking to my friend about the zelda cycle (tm) and she was just like#'yknow. it feels like everyone who likes video games hates video games'#couldn't be me bitch#if i'm not having fun i go home#totk isn't perfect but it's also wonderful and i'm still very pleased by it as a sequel and standalone game#it's just a delight to play. sorry.#if you can't expand on the story for yourself and appreciate the more subtle environmental stuff#that's a skill issue#which like cool if it's not for you!#and you have every right to complain!#but i can also explain why i love it anyway#and express annoyance at the bad vibes esp so close to the anniversary
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August: Day 25
Adventures
Spent way too long at the library
Checked out a book that was so old and hadn't been checked out for so long that it was no longer in the library's computer system
Enjoyed an hour of silence at home resting in the peace of the wind outside and the sunlight and shadows of trees flickering on the floor
Read poetry under a tree in the sunset
Writing
Read part of Ruta Sepetys' book on writing
Wrestled with the desire to write a personal, meaningful novel while having no idea what project could fill that need
#adventures in writing#the old book was a lovely old volume of james whitcomb riley's poetry#i loved 'when the frost is on the punkin' in middle school and paging through the book i thought it was perfect for august#i have no idea when the library obtained it#but the copyright page said nothing but 'copyright 1892 by james w riley'#the self-checkout didn't recognize it#and the librarian explained that books will fall out of the system if they're un-checked-out for long enough#which filled me with a secret delight#i was rescuing the poor lonely unloved old book#giving a senior citizen a new chance at life#reading it in the sunset makes me wonder if i could ask the library to sell it to me#they clearly don't need it#and it's such a lovely volume#there's something about reading such an old edition of the book that puts the poems in their proper environment#you can feel the world he was writing about because you're holding a piece of it in your hands#and i just like his poetry#it's sensible poetry if there can be such a thing#not making grand metaphors about nature and the deeper human condition#but just 'there was sunlight on the crick. and a tree. and some butterflies. it was nice.'#plus the country perspective and working-class characters#it's down to earth and homespun and simple and grounded and in love with all the common things of life#and so much of the landscape is so familiar so there's the extra sense of connection#sure some of it gets a bit trite but it's so unpretentious that you can't mind the occasional misstep#and occasionally there's one where the impeccable sense of rhythm he showed in the first poem i loved sneaks up on me and sweeps me away#anyway it was nice it was a good day god is good
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