#What Else Is There's 100 Songs Of 2020
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Point of View
Paige Bueckers x Azzi Fudd
In which sometimes you need someone else's POV
Part II
It's like you got superpowers
Turn my minutes into hours
Paige is struggling
She’s tired from the lack of sleep, sore from practice, and stressed from school. Paige isn’t necessarily sure when she started to feel like everything was too much but everyday she feels herself giving way to the pressure and expectations that she and others place on her.
The blonde isn’t sure when it all got to be so hard. It wasn’t always this difficult but somewhere between studying on planes and not getting enough sleep something in her had snapped.
It was like those huge buckets at the waterpark that slowly filled with water and on a set interval turned to drench all the little ones with water. Except there was nothing playful or even exciting about how Paige was feeling. She was simply just waiting to tilt over; to let it all out. And when everything became too much and she spilled over, Paige would adjust herself and keep it moving because she doesn’t have time to dwell in it; whatever it is. Not when there’s workouts to be had, homework to do, and events to attend.
So, Paige pushed through despite how much she didn’t want to. She pushed through practice, studying, and she’s pushing through the group outing at Ted’s. The blonde doesn’t want to go but she doesn’t want to miss out on what could possibly be her favorite moments with her favorite people. The basketball player also doesn’t want anyone to think less of her or know she’s anything less than 100 percent.
It takes damn near all of her energy but she manages. Cue fake laughter here and a small joke there. Insert a smirk there and faux interest here. Every movement planned and placated specifically to not raise any eyebrows.
But then Azzi arrives and suddenly Paige isn’t acting anymore because her laugh is real and the banter is effortless. Her smirk is natural and she hangs onto every word that Azzi says because she wants to memorize her voice for years to come. Slowly but surely the dark cloud that has been a permanent fixture over Paige has evaporated and the body that used to lag with exhaustion is now buzzing with energy.
The best friends have only been engaging in conversation for a few minutes but Paige swears that Azzi has been fighting off the looming darkness for a lifetime.
You got more than 20-20, babe
Made of glass the way you see through me
You know me better than I do
Can't seem to keep nothing from you
Maybe Azzi has been fighting off the dark cloud that seems to follow Paige. It seems to be the case when she shows up at the older girl’s apartment one day to demand answers.
Paige doesn’t immediately give in though, wanting to not bother her best friend with her own battles. Her not being able to swim does not mean Azzi is to drown.
“What are you talking about?” Paige asks. The blonde thinks she might have gotten too good at lying because the way her voice goes up a pitch and her head cocks to the side is so natural to her, she almost believes that she doesn’t know what Azzis is really asking her. Almost.
“Don’t play dumb with me, Bueckers.” Azzi growls. The use of her last name makes Paige flinch and that makes Azzi soften. The curly-haired girl is simply tugging on the tether that keeps them connected and afloat. The last thing she wants to do is push them further away. So despite the frustration that flows through her veins, she takes a deep breath before reaching for her favorite blonde-haired girl.
“Tell me what’s wrong.” Azzi whispers in Paige's ear as she engulfs her in a hug. Her tone is soft like she’s trying not to scare her blue-eyed girl away. It is accompanied by a soft hand that runs from the base of her neck to the end of her back.
Paige doesn’t know what exactly causes her to break like a cheap rubber band but suddenly she wipes one tear. And another. And another until there’s too many and her body is shaking.
She guesses that despite not wanting her team to know, she wishes that someone did; that someone cared enough to see when she wasn’t okay.
Azzi knew. Of course she did.
How you touch my soul from the outside?
Permeate my ego and my pride
“Babe, tell me what’s wrong.” Azzi gently demands of her best friend. The words acted as a key for a lock that Paige didn’t know existed because suddenly she can’t stop talking.
She’s going on and on about her classes and then work and the team. How everything is too much. How it’s all pulling her in different directions. How she feels the need to be everything to everyone and nothing to herself. Is she allowed to not want everything she’s worked so hard for? Is she allowed to breathe?
When she’s done, the boulder that has situated itself on Paige’s chest is gone but it’s pain is still prevalent. Her vision is blurry and spotty. Her voice feels so far away as if she’s not in her own body. Her ears are hot and her heartbeat is loudly beating through them.
Paige is spiraling but well maybe not.
Because soon, Azzi’s voice is in her ear telling her to match her breathing and Paige feels a cold hand over her heart before those same hands are pulling her closer.
“Babe, why didn’t you tell me?” The question rings on the blonde’s ears but she can’t answer because Azzi has tears running down her face and the sight is devastating to Paige.
“Don’t cry” the blonde whispers as she reaches to wipe the stray tears from her Azzi’s face. The action causes the younger girl to chuckle because how is it that the most caring person she knows is experiencing so much pain.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t want to be a burden. I also didn’t want the team to think I wasn’t 100 percent. It’s been tough since my injury and the last thing I need is for people to doubt me again because I can’t handle a little pressure.”
“Look at me.” Azzi commands. She waits until her favorite pair of blue eyes meet hers before continuing. “You could never be a burden, P. No one worth listening to would ever doubt you for your internal struggles. It’s shitty, yes but this does not define who you are.”
Paige nods a little before leaning in to hug her best friend once more before settling herself on Azzi’s chest.
“You don’t have to be 100 percent to be loved, Paige. I love you through it all.”
“I love you too”
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Thanks for the tag, though you should know you’re putting me through unmeasurable amounts of mental torment (/JOKING, just so we’re clear) because I barely ever listen to music 😅
Tagging @upsettimyspagetthi this is your problem now bestie (also I have no other friends on here lmao)
Top 5 On Repeat tag game
@powdeeee @creampuffqueen @mushed-kid
#no you don’t get it this was impossible#like I said. I don’t really listen to music#so I just picked the ones that get stuck in my head the most often#I have a playlist but that’s only for walking to and from grandma’s house bc it’s a 2km trip#and I’m not allowed to be left alone with my thoughts. the one time I forgot my headphones I resorted to eating snow#and I’m not even joking here#so that’s 40 minutes of music a week. sometimes 2 weeks.#used to get more in when I had school. though usually I just turned on some stupid askreddit text to speech video#anyway#I’m russian to the core and so is most of my music taste sorry not sorry#like. I’ve been speaking English since I was 6. I literally think in it. English songs register as nothing but empty noise to me#other languages actually make my brain listen. yes even my native one#I can’t explain it but my sister has it the other way around lmao#that’s probably why I have literally never heard of a single song anyone else has mentioned#so I’m reblogging without voting lmao. I have not a single clue what any of these are#I’m not well versed in what people listen to AT ALL. my music taste is just my mom’s music taste + dead blonde + Soviet movie soundtracks#like I said. russian to the core#I only really put in Waterloo because it’s the only English song I could think of that got stuck in my head a lot a few months back#I haven’t listened to it in ages. but if I put in something else this would have no votes#and that’s embarassing as fuck man#my playlist has almost 100 songs in it and maybe about 8 are in English? maybe less? idk I didn’t count#used to have more. a bunch of ABBA and Marina mostly. but they started to annoy me so I removed them#back in 2020 though there wasn’t a single russian song on there. though that doesn’t make it better at all#because it was all hamilton and heathers and six and so on and so forth#we don’t talk about my musical theatre phase okay. it’s bad enough that I have to remember it#anyway. I’m getting distracted again but that’s because I’m anxious and manic bc of today. I didn’t get a wink of sleep so my filter is off#and I ramble and spout random nonsense that no one will read. but I do it anyway bc who’s gonna stop me?#fun fact a lot of my playlist is songs with character or ship vibes. second option is sooo Malina coded. fourth is Mingzan <3#the others aren’t though. that’s just my own stuff. character related ones don’t get stuck in my head too often for some reason#probably because I already think of my characters way too much to be normal 😅
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amazon standing lamp - using drugs and sex and other unhealthy distractions and coping mechanisms to deal with losing people you love out of your own fault. the top-heavy amazon standing lamp part is a really old wilbur joke (back in 2020 he joked about naming a song this) and it also reminds me of how (i think it was him?) he once said that he moves house so often that he loses so many belongings and only has a few things left that he cares about, i think this pairs really well in the song how the artificial meaningless things are all that remain
mine / yours - the breakdown of a relationship, seeing the warning signs and the things you take for granted assuming a person will stay with you forever despite it all
around the pomegranate - this song reminds me a lot of "since i saw vienna", when a place (california in this song) becomes so married to a person that it serves as a source of comfort and nostalgia for when things were simple and happier. being on the road you can never set down roots and people come and go from your life
i don't think it will ever end - he lives life in front of millions of people (chat in this song) watching his every move, like an actor he either has to play the part he's made for himself or isolate himself from this audience, it's a repetitive cycle that sends him downhill
glass chalet - back in the dark days of 2021 i remember wilbur would always joke (SLASH SERIOUS) about quitting streaming and disappearing off the face of the planet for years without a single word. VERY HEALTHY MINDSET exhibited right here in this song
melatonin 130 - I LOVE 100 GECS!! but in all seriousness the constant reminder that you have mental illness/anxiety your entire life and you can only cope with it, that it impairs you even when you should be happy cus obviously you're living out what you thought was your dream and everyone else thinks you should be on top of the world duh!
oh distant you - JUST KILL ME. your sister was right but WORSE!!!!!!!! again you take for granted that someone will stick with you forever and only after it's over realizing that you can't fill the hole where they were. and again we're back on fixating on who is the villain in this narrative
eulogy - your sister was right but worse 2, this song focuses on the whispers (good and bad) leftover from a relationship. harkening back to screensaver where he says that the subject in talking about their relationship basically makes him sound like hitler, and your sister was right where he talks about the warning signs the subject should have seen, this squarely places the blame on him
dropshipped cat shirt - I LOVE 100 GECS!!! but anyway the grueling day-to-day of being on the move, singing to people who adore you and make up a version of you in their head, latching onto unhealthy coping mechanisms to keep going, you have everything you ever needed and wanted but you're bored out of your mind
the median - short but sweet! as i said earlier, wilbur always has to play a part, and this audience projects their version of himself as the truth
trying not to think about it - I KNOW I PUT DAMN NEAR THE WHOLE SONG DOWN HERE BUT LISTEN. again realizing how much you take for granted the assumption that someone will stick with you forever. wilbur has mentioned before how as a hypochondriac, he's never taken seriously by doctors whenever he doesn't feel well. also this idea of romance and love as something just for the aesthetic, not as something that gives you stability and meaning but realizing that it can be that for you until its too late.
10 week rule - who got him pregnant?? but in all seriousness i think this can be read as a way of turning a new page, but obviously its not as simple as just getting rid of something unwanted
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Why do I like Alastor?
Listen. When your therapist starts psychoanalyzing you and it sounds like an Alastor analysis, you gotta do some soul searching. So, I’m going to list off all of our similarities. This is going to be more unorganized than usual.
1. We like being in control:
We’re both puppeteers! We like having people obey us, not the other way around. We’re very anti-submission (my therapist’s word) and don’t like being told what to do. We don’t like having people more powerful than us in the room or even in the area, because something more powerful than us is something that can override our will—and, by extension, our comfort zone and boundaries.
When it comes to romantic relationships, the healthiest solution is to find someone who’s into being dominated. (Cough cough, Vox. I told you guys I write my own kinks.)
2. We have trouble feeling sympathy and empathy:
It’s something I had to practice, but I get the feeling Alastor never bothered. I’m not very good at it, either. Then again, I’m not killing people.
3. We have violent urges:
Yeah, that is very much a thing for me. The difference is that Alastor carries them out without remorse. I usually just ignore those thoughts, or try to think of something else.
4. We mostly stick to one era of music:
Alastor has the Jazz Age, I have the 2010s. Pretty much nothing after 2020 appeals to me, outside of fan songs.
5. We don’t have breakdowns often, but when we do, it’s wild:
Alastor monologued during his. I hyperventilate during mine and feel like I’m not inside my body. Like I said, it’s wild.
6. We pull our hair:
If my hands aren’t occupied, I’ll end up with a hairball in them. But the way Alastor was tugging? With those claws? Yeesh.
7. People see our rage as impotent:
Yes, this is about the people that think Alastor’s frustration with Lucifer was “pathetic”. Yes, that did hit a powerful nerve in me. If you yell right in my ear the moment you open the door, even if I don’t already know you’re the reason there are yearly mass murders, I will immediately hate you. And contrary to a lot of bad-faith fanfiction, buttering up our ego or something is not the solution. The best way to calm us down is to be taken seriously. With Alastor, of course, the ego thing will certainly help, but it’s not the root.
8. We feel impotent when we’re enraged:
This ties in with the last one. Alastor literally grows several hundred times in size when he’s truly angry, that’s pretty obviously a self-comforting action. If I’m bigger than them, they can’t hurt me. If I’m bigger than them, nothing at all can hurt me. That kind of thing.
9. We don’t like constant change:
Alastor’s outfit (which isn’t era-accurate, according to someone much more knowledgeable than I am) is evidence that he isn’t adverse to change as a whole, but someone like Vox is a constant source of anxiety for us. It’s very hard to keep up with something that’s always changing, and we can’t get our feet on the ground and a moment to breathe. I can change which jacket I wear, but never wearing the same jacket twice? Kill me now.
10. We put on a facade around people we want to be in the good graces of:
Alastor with the hotel residents, and me with pretty much everyone. This ‘facade’ I’m talking about isn’t necessarily a fake personality, it’s a facet of our real personalities that will best appeal to the people we’re talking to. That’s another thing my therapist brought up: I’m always putting on a mask, and there’s so many that no one knows who I really am. Hell, even I don’t know at this point. Alastor’s been putting on masks for over a century. I don’t think he knows anymore, either.
I think he thinks he knows who he is, but if someone poked a hole in that image of himself as the Radio Demon, he’d shatter as easily as glass. Because he’s not 100% evil, as much as he wants to be.
11. People think we’re a danger to others, even when we’re not:
*gestures to Vaggie* *gestures to the entire fucking fandom* *gestures to my mother* *gestures to unnamed family members that didn’t even have the guts to say it to my face* It sucks. Like, thank you for taking me seriously for once??? But also no.
12. We have dramatic body language to make up for stunted facial expressions:
Alastor has his eternal smile, and I have my eternal frown. The facial expressions thing was actually brought up by a previous therapist. I’ve had to throw my arms out like a theatre kid to make sure a family member knew I wasn’t being sarcastic…I’m not a theatre kid.
13. We switch between being extreme extroverts and extreme introverts:
I’ve said before that I’m low functioning in almost everything except social interaction. I can keep up with the fastest mouths and the longest-winded, but I’ll disappear for a week and only emerge for water. Meanwhile, Alastor keeps up his overly-cheerful facade up for the whole series and disappears for two episodes. And for seven years before that.
14. When people talk shit to us, we fly off the handle at the speed of light:
Husk in the hallway scene. Lucifer, period. Vox at the end of episode two. Everyone on Tumblr and Wattpad that’s ever picked a fight with me. That one anon in particular. The list goes on.
15. We have very stunted emotions, except for anger:
I don’t know why anger is an exception, either. But we don’t see any strong emotions from Alastor besides rage (and maybe amusement), so it’s clearly a thing for him too.
16. We enjoy the smell of death:
Death smells pretty nice, actually. There’s nothing quite like it. Alastor gets it. If anyone wants the full story of Larry the Rotting Deer Carcass, let me know. I’d love to tell it.
And that’s all I can think of right now. This definitely veered into a bit of character analysis for Alastor, but then again, I was analyzing myself, so that just proves my point.
#hazbin hotel#alastor#the radio demon#alastor analysis#self analysis#autism#aspergers#i was originally going to make a little alastor comic about this#but i wouldn’t have been able to say all the things i needed to
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Ok so Apple released it's 100 Greatest Albums list a while ago and I scoffed at it, but after watching some youtubers whine about it in different ways, I realized I hadn't given it the fairest shake. I haven't listened to every album on it and a lot of stuff I have listened to I haven't listened to in a long while. So, I'm gonna listen to every album featured and decide how I feel about them. And for fun y'all get small quick reviews.
Starting off, here's part one of my reviews.
I decided to start with Adele's 21. Not for any special reason other than it seemed like it might be nice to listen to in the shower. Adele has a great, powerful voice, but the album has two song archetypes that just get repeated. The songs are mostly competent so individually they're fine, but together as an album they make a very boring experience. Also, I recognized Rumor Has It from a commercial or something, I fucking hate that song. Docked extra points for having that song. This album doesn't belong on the list at all to me, and even if we are throwing a bone to the modern 2010s-2020s artists, she definitely doesn't deserve number 15. A ridiculous placement.
I decided to take on Drake's Take Care and hey guys, does Drake make any other songs? Why do they all sound the same? Does he do anything other than sad boy shit? Of the three Drake releases I've now listened to, this one is easily the best one. I didn't hate the experience, for that Drake deserves some kudos. But, I don't think there's anyway to view Drake positively in 2024. Maybe in 2011 this seemed special, but in 2024 I can easily say that this does not deserve to be on this list, let alone at 47. Giving Drake a pity placement is fine, but not in the top 50.
I have never understood the love that Hotel California garners. Like, the song is good, but it's not earth shattering, and the rest of the album is pretty typical rock for the era. There is just so little content that I haven't got much to say, it's competent enough to not be laughably bad, but it's also so run of the mill there's no highlights. Picking it for a list like this is what I'd call a safe option, not a real option.
I'll be frank, I'm not very familiar with Robyn or Body Talk, so maybe I don't have context on how important this album was to the history of the genre or music at large. Though, to my ear, the album bounces between having wonderful dance pop tracks to having some really boring, repetitive tracks. Still, not the worst album here (not even the worst in this post), it's just hard for me to really gauge how deserving it is for this list.
Probably an album with an unfair advantage, I've been listening to RATM since I was a kid. My favorite Rage album is definitely The Battle of Las Angeles, but I'm not dumb enough to say that should be on the list. Still think Evil Empire had greater music and potentially greater reach than the self titled, but this being here isn't bad. Just a shame it's only at 97.
Did enjoy this a quite a bit. However, musically speaking it feels incredibly one note. This belongs in the top 100 albums ever? Did it really have that level of cultural inspiration? I'm not mad at it being included, not even mad it's at 96, but for it to be in a better spot than the self titled RATM album? Incredibly stupid.
Probably a dumb thing to say, but this is what I expected Drake's album to be like? Fun music and fun lyrics about being a sad boy, a lover boy, and being too playful with women. Honestly, the only reason it gets such low ratings is consistently Usher says shit like this
GET IT?! IT'S CONFESSION PART II, SO HE SAYS PART TWO OF MY CONFESSION!! SOOOO CLEVER come on man. Does it belong on the best 100 list? I don't know. Let someone else decide that.
I have no issue with either of this being on the list, being in the 90s, or any real thoughts to give. Burial isn't quite my vibe musically so I got nothing to say, and Solange is great so it's like. It's cool they're there, no thoughts.
I don't have an issue with George Michael being on this list, but this album? I vibe Faith far more.
Flower Boy by Tyler the Creator is absolutely one of my favorite albums. I'd have imagined that Apple would have chosen Igor, since it's the one people universally seem to adore, but I'm happy Flower Boy is getting love. Flower Boy is my favorite from Tyler and it has special meaning in my heart, so any praise the album can get.
Look, if you're picking AC/DC albums to put on a list, then this is probably the correct pick, but why would you put AC/DC on the top 100 Albums of all Time list? I don't even think they'd qualify for the Top 100 Hard Rock Albums from before the 2000s list! Is it cuz of the Iron Man soundtrack? It's gotta be right?
This is probably my most unpopular opinion: Lady Gaga is overrated as hell. I do not understand what people in 2009 saw in these songs and I still don't get it now. Maybe it belongs on this Top 100 Albums List cuz it had some kind of cultural impact, I mean her music was inescapable for a time. But, I don't get it, I wouldn't put it on my list, and Bad Romance is absolutely one of the most annoying pop songs the radio has ever played.
And, to conclude this long ass pointless post, I'll just jump ahead again to end this on an album I enjoy.
I don't get the weird revisionism that happens around Kid A. I do love it to death, but when it came out it was critically hated. It just feels like everyone treats this as the greatest triumph in music, when the only people that have heard it are Radiohead fans and the weird hipster that tries to act smarter than you in music. Oh well, it's Captain America's favorite album so I guess it works.
I guess more of the issue is Radiohead is one of like, three or four artists on this list that gets more than one spot. Why waste a spot on Kid A at 33 when you have Ok Computer at 12, let some other unnamed artist be on the list instead.
Neither Kid A or OK Computer are my favorite Radiohead albums, but hey, I like Kid A. It's one of four albums I listen to when trying to fall asleep at night, so it's nice to see mentioned I guess.
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Being Romantic with Their S/O
Anon asked: Hello! Just found your blog and what you’ve written looks great. Could I request romantic headcanons or Javier and Kieran with their s/o please?
rdr2 masterlist
Oh heck yeah, lovely anon. I hope this is to your liking!
Originally published on January 14, 2020
Javier, Kieran x Reader (Gender-Neutral/Nonbinary)
Warnings: none
Javier Escuella -
He is a dreamsicle
Listen- I see this man as a mix of Arthur and Charles when it comes to relationships
If you remember the bar scene early on in the game Javier and Charles was a smooth motherfucker until Arthur ruined it lmao
Anyway- I bring up Arthur because in a real relationship Javier wouldn’t be as smooth. Why? This man is passionate in relationships and he wouldn’t want to mess this up with you
Sooooo that’s when the nerves come in- He second guesses himself- He calls in his inner Arthur and becomes an absolute fool but he will do that all with passion and no regrets
He will 100% do small PDA if you allow that
Since he’s one of the more quiet fellows though, he would be watching you work as you do your chores in camp
100/10 writes songs for you in his native language
Will sing them for the group since they have no idea what the heck they are about
And he will only translate when both of you are alone
He’s the one who is so incredibly soft with you and as soon as someone else comes into the proximity he’ll flip a switch and glare daggers into them- yearning for their demise since his special time with you one-on-one comes to a halt
If you bring drinks into this- he would be a sleepy/grumpy drunk
He wouldn’t care where he is or who is there he will climb onto your lap and pass the heck out
I also imagine in that sleepy/grumpy drunken haze he would be professing his love for you for like the tenth time in a row
Would melt if you just call him Javi
He’s up most nights so he would have no problem playing/singing a soft lullaby for you if you need it
Kieran Duffy -
Is straight-up a puppy with you
If it won’t cause you any inconvenience he would follow you around camp and just bask in your presence since he really can’t do much
It would be his honor to help you around
He would show you how he takes care of the horses, how he talks to them, just be a total cutie about it
Would have his self-doubts about having you- Is he good enough? Do you still think he has ties to the O’Driscolls? Do you trust him? – He would never bring this up though, you would have to bring it up and reassure him
He wouldn’t do PDA- He doesn’t want you to receive any harsh words that the others may joke
That and he doesn’t feel worthy, probably wouldn’t for quite a while : (
Whenever you are near him, he can’t help but be all smiles
Honestly feels like he’s at home here with the Van Der Linde gang if you’re by his side
Will gain courage with you as his pillar of support
Is gentle/sweet with his words and would always give you praise in whatever you do
Always has a compliment for you every five minutes
Thinks you are the most amazing person he’s ever come by
When he gets used to the relationship he would be brave and initiate touches
Once he gets used to the idea that you are actually is and he is yours, he will be even more head over heels in love
He knows all of your likes and dislikes and will always have a small gift waiting for you on your bed
Will always give you cheek and forehead kisses upon greeting you
Will love to share his newfound dreams and hopes of the future he envisions with you
He will malfunction if you share your thoughts of the future being with him
Will honestly think this is a dream for the most part
Overall, a good soft boi who deserves all the happiness
#softrozene writes#rdr2 x reader#red dead redemption 2 x reader#javier escuella x reader#kieran duffy x reader#headcanons#rdr2 headcanons#gender-neutral reader#nonbinary reader#fluff
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Oh, Jimin...
These are my personal impressions, thoughts, interpretations and opinions on Jimin’s solo FACE album. Some of the things I say here are built on things I know from past original content, interviews and what Jimin has shared personally. Some of it is just me reveling in my first experience with Jimin’s long awaited album.
It is such a serious album. Jimin said this is the story of what he was feeling, chronologically, 2020-2022, during the pandemic era. At the beginning of 2020, BTS was rising higher than any Korean artist ever had before and then all of a sudden the momentum came to a halt, and there was nothing. Having the life you’ve known suddenly jerked away from you is traumatizing.
Once the king of social media, Jimin almost ceased by the end of 2020 and never went back. “Oh, he just outgrew it.” No, the man was struggling with his issues and not only did he not need to see the extra crap spewed all over social media but he had nothing left to give, nothing left inside.
I noticed how Jimin looked physically back in 2020. He was downright frail y’all. The man was trying to give us what we wanted at the expense of his mental and physical health. That breakdown he had during the ending ments in Memories 2020 was too much. They were all stressed out, but Jimin... those that said he was being over dramatic... the man was struggling with his mental health.
I wrote this last June, 2022 but never posted it:
After Memories 2020 dropped, we’ve heard Jimin say he struggled after everything got canceled. Days upon days that turned into months upon months and more than two years passed before they finally returned to in-person performances. He stated that during isolation and lockdowns he wondered what was the purpose of his life, or that he had lost his purpose.
Jimin’s struggles were most likely much more severe than he let on and he 100% kept it to himself because he didn’t want us to worry about him. That sounded like solo delusional projection but think about Jimin and how he’s behaved in the past...always telling us not to worry. Always saying things to reassure us that he’s happy, he eats well, don’t worry.
There was no working, no performing, their lives and his life changed drastically overnight just like all of ours did. Would we ever get back to normal? What will happen in the future? When will all of this end?
Face-Off
The album opens with a carnival calliope, it was a little jarring and unexpected. The images it conjured in my brain as the notes played were of a worn out circus winding down. It made me think of the big wild circus that WAS his life, and it just wound down and keeled over.
Knowing the premise of the album, I think the title, Face-Off, implies Jimin is looking at himself. Speaking to himself. The lyrics could also imply he is speaking to someone else, like people he once trusted. But I don’t think so.
He was having a confrontation with himself. Reasoning and bargaining with himself.
Maybe he once trusted himself but in this time and place in which he finds himself, he questions what is he doing? and second guessing himself. Day in and day out, the days are all the same nothingness. Hiding his feelings, faking it, pretending it was all ok. It’s all cool. It’ll be all right. He has said many times he looks back at that time and thinks he could have done more for the fans. Being hard on himself. His own worst critic.
And then this enters the picture: using alcohol to self-medicate. Getting drunk. Numbing the pain. Forgetting. Drink all night. Oh, Jimin...
We know he has a very high alcohol tolerance. He once mentioned that he used to drink a lot. When he declined the champagne during the live after the Busan concert, we all made jokes about it and moved on. Oh, Jimin.
Face-Off feels like it could have been a purging song when he wrote it. A little primal, you know... just scream, get it out. Painful but cathartic.
This is the lyric that was scary: “tonight is a beautiful night, I think I’m close (or I think I have it all/I think I’ve found myself)” were chilling to me because they did not come across as optimistic, they came across as being at the end of one’s rope after becoming a shell of a person. He follows that line with “tonight I don’t want to be sober.” Oh, Jimin.
His vocals open very low and moody then transition to a plaintive cry, punctuated with anger.
Pour it down, pour it out... the anger, the emotions, the words, just pour it out.
Interlude: Dive
Like the calliope that sadly wound down, Dive opens with the melody slowly winding back up to speed. Another day starting. Someone knocks, voices, the ambience of a normal day, breathing, running footsteps. The crowd cheering and Jimin’s voice during his ending ments at the Busan concert, more sounds of people in his life. We hear Jimin’s footsteps trudging, it sounds like we hear him climbing steps, entering his house, closing the door, and first thing he does when he is alone in the quiet is pour a drink and drinking deeply. I am concerned.
Maybe it is supposed to represent the closing of Chapter 1, about a day in the past that was once a “normal” day, since it included the last things he said during that concert.
The music track is dreamlike, repetitive. Living in a dream. Every day. Same thing. Go home. Drink. Do it again. Dive means go deep. In deep. He’s in deep.
There is a very subtle line between drinking in order to make it through another day/night versus drinking to relax and wind down. A slippery slope to walk on every single day.
We’ve transitioned from the world changing overnight to living in a daze trying to pretend everything is ok. Coping.
Like Crazy
(I am going to express my thoughts using the English version of the song.)
Jimin has explained the song is influenced by the movie of the same name.
I have learned that the dialogue from the movie was NOT original to the movie but hired voice actors specifically for the song: “I think we can last forever.” “I’m afraid that everything will disappear.” “Just trust me.” And at the end: “How long again?” “What’s the point?”
He has said the dialogue that was used fit the message of the song. I have not seen the movie. I don’t think the song is a literal interpretation of the movie. I think the song’s basic concept is the emotional struggle trying to maintain a dream. But maintaining a dream is unrealistic no matter what you do to try to make it last. Jimin had to come to terms with that.
Jimin’s vocals begin very light and airy, very dreamy.
[God, he’s fine.]
The vibe of the song is sort of retro, very much evokes the artist, The Weeknd. It has a very 80′s synth beat. It is a very danceable song. Like I said, on the surface.... very dreamy.
Vocals transition and it still seems like he’s having a conversation with himself, or with a voice within himself. A voice telling him to “trust me, follow me... I will make it good for you.” Me: gives a side eye to that voice in Jimin’s head because now I know it’s not trustworthy. “I’ll take the pressure off, been reaching for the stars.” Chasing that high. Go easy, Jimin. Please be careful.
Yes, the lyrics are also very sexy... “give me a good ride,” and “Let me have a taste.” Yep, I’m with ya on all that... ahem...
[Wow]
[side note: I love the make up in the bathroom scene with that stroke of silver under his eye.]
“All my reflections, I can’t even recognize.” ...what he sees of himself is not reality. He doesn’t recognize himself. Don’t try to save me. I want to stay like this.
To me, the mud on the floor, the mud flowing down the walls, the mud on the hand that grabs his wrist at the beginning of the song, the mud on his hand at the end... could represent his perceived imperfections, flawed, therefore dirty: his struggle to cope, his less than perfect thoughts... substance abuse... the struggle that he needs to be perfect on the outside or the attempt to appear perfect on the outside but there’s all this dirt on the inside that he can’t hide any longer.....the huge pile of mud at his feet is out of place in the otherwise normal room of his life. Becoming overwhelming for him.
Some of the visuals of this song are, to put it bluntly, very, not heterosexual. Again, these are just my impressions and opinions. But a friend pointed out the photo on the front of his pants and I went looking for information about the art photographer, Robert Mapplethorpe. He was heavily involved in New York’s gay BDSM scene. Some of the things written about him:
“In a rapidly changing society, he fearlessly confronted taboos surrounding gender, sexuality and mortality, seeking to instill beauty and dignity into subjects that lay outside accepted social norms.”
“... a man who consistently brought his audience face to face with the unknown and the unseen.”
The song ends with him reaching toward the camera to smear it with the mud to hide his imperfect self. When Jimin puts his face in front of the camera, he doesn’t want us to see his imperfections. He wants to be as perfect as he can, he says it all the time, he wants to look pretty for us, but I hope he has realized we accept him as a real human being even with his very human imperfections.
Alone
The alarm clock goes off...yet another day...doesn’t trust the people even if they are nice to him...he’s lost...day in day out... passing out drunk and not remembering...what am I doing? am I the only one feeling like this? Alone, pretending to be ok...every day the same...how much more until I can go back to before? Feeling more and more isolated within his own mind, pretending to be ok but losing himself every day. Mayday. The cry for help. Telling himself it will be all right (we all told ourselves this back then). The small nagging voice that doesn’t believe it.
Realizing you’ve changed and you are never going back to the way you were before.
Not gonna lie, that line right there broke my heart. Gives new meaning to Set Me Free Pt. 2′s line: "raise your hands for the past me.”
He was in so much trouble and no one knew. He reassured us over and over that he was fine. Not to be over-dramatic but I don’t want to think about how close he was... I have seen a few people say this song really resonated with them. It is a very powerful cry for help.
Jimin’s vocals blew me away. The vocals start out very subdued, almost beaten down. His vocal fry squeezes my heart. He ends crying out “what do I have to do to end this darkness?” Bad twilight. Night’s can be hard.
Set Me Free Pt. 2
From my post on March 17, 2023:
Going insane to stay sane. Raise your hands for the past me. Now set me free. This is where I literally cried. Oh, Jimin.
Going crazy trying to fake being ok.
Now I know this song is about him saving himself, setting himself free from this prison he was in, the depression, breaking the chains of alcohol dependency, of telling the naysayers out there and his own internal naysayer to go fuck themselves, Park Jimin is back. Strong and beautiful and fierce. The light of the moon shining on us.
We know he still considers soju his joy. He sounds like he’s taken control, not totally abstaining, but in control. I only wish the rest of his days are happiness and stable mental health well-being.
Letter
So unexpected. I was in shock. My heart floated away.
People talk about how Jimin’s album has no collabs on it, unlike the previous member’s solo work. My opinion is, when you are sharing deeply intimate feelings and emotions and struggles about yourself you don’t want or need other people/voices on your song. It’s not appropriate.
The only exception to this was… Jungkook…not exactly a collab, but he’s there. The other songs used background vocalists who are not members of BTS.
This song was hidden. Yes, there have been other hidden songs. But come on...
Letter has a strong stroke of Promise in the “oh, oh.” And when Jungkook starts singing it is like the world is set right because those two voices blend like nothing else I’ve ever heard. And he comes in in the middle of the song gently supporting Jimin’s vocals. But unmistakably Jungkook. I know it’s up to interpretation, but for me, the lyrics from then on take on something a little extra in meaning with Jungkook there singing with Jimin.
You held your hand out to me and now I will hold on to you. So simple and beautiful. The sounds of the surf remind me of the song “Okinawa” that Jimin posted once. Which also reminds me of their pics at Santa Monica beach...
Letter seems to be an actual letter. When the members told him to write it down, put it in a song, maybe Jimin’s first impulse was to write it as if it was a letter. The lyrics are simple and very to the point and convey:
“...though I’m not good with words, I want to sincerely say let’s make each other happier. You who showed me I am bigger than my small self. You've been by my side and I will be by yours. I hope we stay together until the cold winter. Though the future is unknown and scary, let’s stay together. Never forget we’re together.”
There are references to past songs: Sea, Spring Day. Both of those songs were from 2017.
But Jungkook. On a Jimin song. That was hidden. Clever. That we had no idea about...even though Kookie knocked us over the head with it when he played the guitar for us, making sure we knew he’d only had one lesson. Who do you think gave him that first guitar lesson? Jimin... and Kookie blurting out some English in his last live... who do you think he’s been practicing English with? Duh, Jimin.
It was a hidden song AND the credits were hidden on the page in the book. They were printed in varnish only, which is basically shiny, clear ink.
You know what I think? Jungkook knew about this song since Festa dinner. The teasing about not being offered the chance to listen to the song. That little shit. I KNOW IT WAS THIS SONG!! I JUST KNOW IT!! This was the rumored subunit. Or at least one of them. I guess we’ll eventually see if there are any more between the others.
They sound so beautiful together. I love them. And as I keep saying, they are fine… they’ve been fine.
Last words...
Anyway, that was a lot of words. Maybe I got too deep. Jimin explained himself about how the album originated.
As I was telling my friend earlier...everything in this album has peeled a layer, or several layers, away from EVERYTHING I've seen and heard from Jimin and the group since 2020. I had written some things in the past, like last June and even before that, about how Jimin seemed not well mentally. Things that I had no business saying in public because who the hell am I to think I can say something like that about someone I have never met? So I never posted those words. I never thought I would be so close to the mark in thinking those things. He’s been through it, wrote songs about it, and moved on. And I am so proud of him and this album.
#jimin face#face-off#like crazy#i'm so proud of jimin#if they were trying to quash any ships this was not the way to go about it#i said that after hickey-gate too#also jikook#did i mention i am so proud of jimin?#and kookie is so funny
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please tell us how Brutus is a c!Karl song i would love to hear you out
Okayokayokayokay. So I understand that a lot of people never watched c!Karl’s lore pre-TFTSMP however there is a really good analysis video of him on YouTube that explains it really well, and it was made before doomsday even happened.
But to sum it up: c!Karl really wanted to be involved in the lore. He was always trying to be a part of the big stuff, and he even comments on it during c!Niki’s birthday party, when c!Wilbur is about to blow Manberg up (You can actually hear him say ‘wait, am I part of a big event for once?’) Sad-ist’s meme animatic Dre Smp was made because there was a whole bit about Karl wanting to be included.
Later, c!Karl made Rutabag-Ville while the Pogtopia war was going down (this is actually the context in which c!Techno chased c!Quackity and gave That Speech) and eventually annexed it to c!Schlatt. Why? Well, he’d wanted to join Pogtopia, but had been turned down, I believe it was even specifically by c!Quackity.
Later, c!Quackity and c!Tubbo confronted him over this decision, and he eventually said that he sided with c!Schlatt because he felt welcome and c!Schlatt was nice to him. Now, obviously, we all know this was manipulation, and it’s my own little headcanon that c!Karl knew subconsciously what he was doing, but wanted to be accepted so badly he didn’t care.
This also extends beyond the Pogtopia war. I think not a lot of people actually know that Karl was part of the New L’Manberg government as its creative head, but he was left out of every discussion by the rest of the cabinet (we got ROBBED of butcher army c!Karl). He expresses bitterness over this readily! One thing I forgot to mention earlier is that he actually did try to get people on Manberg’s side back in the war by giving them gifts, but they always burned them when he left.
He also founded El Rapids during this time with c!Sapnap, c!Quackity, and c!George. Some drama happened, and in order to assert their nations independence, Karl sacrificed one of his lives by blowing up part of his country in order to frame Eret for it.
(side note, but fun fact; c!Karl was the one who snitched to c!Dream about c!Eret helping Pogtopia, which is what got c!George on the throne. Just a little fun fact.)
Of course, his lore does kinda peter out after that. His CC began streaming TFTSMP, and we know how that went. Not to say he never streamed at all, but they became a lot rarer since a lot of the server began to think they needed more scripted lore, thus their standards for streaming became higher.
I also agree with the headcanon that he has FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) and while you could say that this was just his CC wanting to be in more lore, you would be right, but if we brushed off character’s lore because the CC wasn’t 100% in-character, we would have very little characterization left. A lot of Karl’s characters comes from before the 4th wall had really solidified on the server, plus it comes from late-2020, while a lot of newer fans got into the smp around early to mid 2021.
Basically, Brutus is a song about envy, hatred, and a whole lot of mixed emotions based on the assassination of Julius Caesar. While c!Karl never went to the extremes Brutus did, it’s not really hard to see how closely the song echoes his treatment on the server.
I tend to divide c!Karl’s characterization into three parts; first is his more immature and young personality that is set during the Manberg to El Rapids era, second is his transitioning phase between that and someone a bit more mature, which I put from Doomsday to The Pit (the eighth TFTSMP episode), and third is his more mature characterization, where he is burdened by his time traveler duties and has grown into his own person, past the need to be important and make an impact, though the shadow of Manberg and El Rapids loom over him.
In short, c!Karl is a nuanced character who faced the curse of fanon and lost. But hey, so did everyone else. I’d argue he got some of the worst of it, though C!Ranboo is a tough contender. So is C!Sam, actually. And c!Fundy. Just… a lot of characters got the short stick by fanon.
This is my first shot at making an essay, so it’s a bit messy. A lot of this can be found on vod channels, however, so if anyone wants to give links feel free to do so! Also you can correct me if I got anything wrong, it has been a hot minute since I’ve watched a DSMP vod.
That’s my two cents, anyhow. I just really like c!Karl and feel like he got done dirty by a lot of fans. They really did take a nuanced character who was both selfless and selfish, kind yet a bit of a sadist, loved to mess with his loved ones but also hated when anyone touched them, and turned him into a little soft boy who can’t defend himself against anything or One Of c!Quackity’s Mean Crazy Ex-Fiancés. No, I am not exaggerating, I saw someone legitimately call c!Karl crazy because of the Kinoko argument. Y’all…
That’s pretty much it! My fingers are getting tired so I’m sorry if it got a little messy at the end or I got a bit off topic. If anyone needs more clarification I will happily oblige. There were even a few details I left out because I wanted to cut down on this post’s length. C!Karl is a fascinating character and he’s been my No. 1 for nearly two years at this point. Thank you for listening!
#C!karl#c!karl meta#Analysis#C!Karl is genuinely a fascinating complex character and I’m never going to forgive the fandom into turning him into either#A serious no-nonsense time traveler who is incapable of protecting himself and is incredibly righteous#Or an UwU soft boy who needs constant protection just because he is kind and loving and likes colorful clothing.
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The more time I spend on Spotify, the more it pushes me away from the outer edges of the platform and toward the mushy middle. This is where everyone is serviced the same songs simply because that is what’s popular. In 2018, while the app’s algorithmic autoplay feature was on, I was served the Pavement song “Harness Your Hopes", a wordy and melodic—and by all accounts obscure—B-side from the beloved indie band. The song has over 100 million streams, more than twice as much as their actual college rock hit from the ’90s, “Cut Your Hair", the one Pavement song your average Gen X’er might actually recognize. How did this happen? In 2020, Stereogum investigated the mystery but came up empty-handed from a technological perspective, though the answer seems obvious to me: Whereas many Pavement songs are oblique, rangy, and noisy, “Harness Your Hopes” is among the most pleasant and inoffensive songs in the band’s catalog. It is now, in the altered reality of Spotify, the quintessential Pavement song. When frontman Stephen Malkmus was asked about this anomaly, he sounded blithely defeated: “At this point we take what we can get, even in a debased form. Because what’s left?” The whole “Harness Your Hopes” situation is in part a result of what’s called “cumulative advantage.” It’s the idea that if something—a song, a person, an idea—happens to be slightly more popular than something else at just the right point, it will tend to become more popular still. (On the other hand, something that does not catch on will usually recede in popularity, regardless of quality.) This is the metric of how most social recommendation algorithms work—on Facebook, the more “likes” an article has, the better odds a user will read it. But when this is applied to what songs are sent to which people, Spotify can engineer its own market of popularity as well as what song defines a band. Popular songs on Spotify are popular within the app because they are what most people are listening to. So from both a behavioral psychology and business perspective, it makes sense for Spotify to assume that you want to listen to what other people are listening to. The chances of the average listener staying on the app longer are much higher if Spotify curates songs that have had a similar effect on people whose taste matches theirs.
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JJ knows his strengths and how to highlight them so even if he isn't that musically gifted he can still keep up! His upbringing didn't allow him to be anything but a little diva and I love that for him but I wonder how his personality fits into the group.
But your little character breakdown/plot posts are always good!
GIO.
I've been treating this ask like a very fancy bottle of wine, really waiting for the perfect moment to answer it in the most interesting way possible, and now that LOOPiN is FINALLY (!!!) free from New Wave Music and they officially have a new home, I believe a post dissecting how they used to work under Seo CEO's awful control is a must. And here I have the perfect little moment to ramble about it! Which I love!
So, the short answer to your questions is: J.J fits in very badly on a personal level, and most of the other guys consider him unmanageable to say the least, but! LOOPiN as a whole has been so desensitized to Jiahang's (annoying!) personality because, as long as they were under New Wave, they all knew that he was an untouchable constant; both because of his father's grip on the company stock, and because in mid 2021 J.J made the very strategic decision to take active part on backing LOOPiN financially, and he did so by paying for their dorm room accomodations and making that his sole responsability - which is why in some pieces set on their 'flop era' you can notice that their home is just waaaaay too fucking nice.
But yeah, with anyone who's not Minwoo (from late 2020 up until literally a week before he publicly retired from making music), Haegon (often enough) or Hanjae, Jiahang has had very big professional and personal feuds that still linger. It gets ugly sometimes guys, it really does.
Now! To the longer answer!
NEW WAVE MUSIC's LOOPiN & ITS HIDDEN HIERARCHY:
[❗] TWs: corporate abuse, medical neglect.
If in universe iNSYNCs or just people aware of them were to be consulted, they would say that the chain of command and order of company favoritism while LOOPiN were under New Wave Music (2017 - 2023) ended up as:
01. Minwoo; 02. Seungsoo; 03. Haruki; 04. O.z; 05. J.J; 06. Hanjae; 07. Gyujin; 08. Dylan; 09. Taesong; 10. Haegon.
*Former member Lee Beomseok is not included, but just so you know, he wouldn't crack the Top5.
Which, by looking at the graphic you can see it's pretty off! Let's dissect it!
(NOTE: The two white boxes around the Top4 symbolize leadership roles, and they obviously entail the Produce Line, but less obviously, in a ground right above it, stands Minwoo and J.J in a duo that we can informally call as 'LOOPiN's Crisis Management'.)
At the very top of the food chain, we have J.J: As mentioned above, and also said in posts in the past here and there, Jiahang's spot in LOOPiN was 100% bought by his father, but his privilege goes way beyond just sharing surnames with a major sponsor: J.J has an entire personal team of lawyers, a private stylist and his own manager/financial consultant, Han Qiong (39), which puts him miles ahead of everyone else who depended on New Wave's shady and unprepared staff team. Jiahang's influence is also very present in everything on LOOPiN's two last years under New Wave (which came as consequence of him being Minwoo's "apprentice"), but it's all very subtle, as he always hid behind Minwoo to not spoil his incompetent brat persona to CEO Seo Chanhyuk - many marketing stunts, a good parts of their visual identity and even some promoted songs were handpicked by him but signed off as Minwoo's decisions, and even the members don't know that. As of now, speaking of 2023-0T9-Rare-Rhythm-LOOPiN, only Taesong and Haruki are aware of their past almost co-leadership deal and know how frail J.J actually is with this start over on the career department. He has pretty much no idea how and what he should do next now that he doesn't have a clear advantage! A giant really fell!
Minwoo: Even before he took over the official leader position from Taesong in 2021, everyone working with LOOPiN behind the scenes knew Minwoo was the guy in charge: not only was he the frontman of the Produce Line, but not a single decision even outside the group's sound was made without consulting him, mostly because people felt like they should - his... passionate involvement, let's say, about every aspect of the group was very clear. He also kept riding the wave of his Boy Of The Week days as "the golden trainee", and the respect he build in the industry after butting heads with Chanhyuk and his brigade of shareholders to make LOOPiN creative independent, even though it did give everyone consequences - Seo CEO came to HATE his guts right after they debuted, and was a bitch about them just because Minwoo was always just as much of a bitch back. Him making Taesong the leader during their group debut despite Minwoo's obvious crave for that title was just as much of a move made to try to control them as it was petty, childish shit.
O.z: Wu Zhiming is not someone you can restrain, and New Wave Music came to learn that a beat too late; they also didn't know how to fully support him as a music producer, which O.z took no time to notice and start quietly networking his way into opportunities. Now, his music career outside of LOOPiN is the most stable - he's been the major producer and collaborator with Nico, an independent (and faceless!) singer that in universe has internet fame reaching the likes of Pinkpantheress, and he's definely the first member to reach stable international fame, even if it's a tad controversial. And that's something he did despite New Wave Music, and Zhiming has talked about it publicly with no fear, so everyone knows he's truly independent! You go, O.z!
Seungsoo: Seungsoo always has a hard time seeing the bigger picture, and with his career it was no different: he always assumed the Produce Line was an equal triad and even that he was Minwoo's second hand man (which, LMAO. NO!), and he constantly failed to see everyone always respected him the less. But he was and is a group producer, he did have a voice and some control of LOOPiN as a brand, and that automatically puts him above a lot of the members. Seungsoo is also very popular with the public, known as a sweet talker and charming guy, and his music is very sought after for girl groups and female soloists. He was not doing the worst.
Gyujin: Gyujin, the newest loop dude of them all, stands right in the middle. He joined LOOPiN at a crazy time, but he is flexible by nature and he worked himself into the public's good graces very quickly, all on his own; it barely took him 7 months to be iNSYNC's new darling dearest, which did give some brownie points with Seo CEO at the time. Gyujin is also very familiar with the entertainment industry, which barely changed in the years he spend retired from child acting, so he knew from the get go what to watch out for. His contract signing took 3 weeks because he kept going for legal tweaks, something that immediately set off warning sirens inside Seo CEO's head, but at that point, Gyujin was all he had to try to set off the fire of Beomseok's departure - and many other accusations! If he had more time inside the company, Gyujin could definely pull a J.J and find something to use to his advantage against Chanhyuk, because if there's one thing he'll always do, is find an angle.
Hanjae: As soon as Sangwon got out of the picture as LOOPiN's manager in early 2022, Hanjae found himself in a very interesting position, that being his elevation from someone that was literally hidden for two years inside their own group to a hotshot debutee actor - fully backed by Chanhyuk, who was so fucking tired of LOOPiN having collective fame at this point. As we know, Hanjae's crush on Haruki was old and a well known fact inside New Wave, and it ended up causing his professional downfall; Sangwon mismanaged him on porpouse in LOOPiN's early years to not only punish him for his feelings, but also just to torment Haruki. Recently, Seo CEO has committed the big mistake of trying to convince Hanjae to sell his exclusive contract to an acting agency on New Wave's last days, and despite Hanjae double crossing him and immediately telling everyone about the company's hidden fate back in January so they could prepare for it, Chanhyuk still planted a lot of doubt on Hanjae's mind about his Idol future, and that will be at play very soon, thanks to 'Kick It' winning the comeback poll! So stay tunned!;
Taesong: As said on the Minwoo section, Taesong's role as LOOPiN's leader was given to him because Seo CEO needed someone in charge to be under his thumb, and Taesong filled that role okay enough for as long as he could - Minwoo's very harsh criticism of his every move plus everyone's lack of respect of the sentimental way he used to run things eventually got to him mentally. He had many hiatuses in his career, and with each new one came more of a lack of interest from New Wave Music in him as a way of income. If it wasn't for his own volution and need to get better, Taesong wouldn't be the vocal powerhouse he is now - he payed for his own vocal coaches, all non affiliate with the company! By the time he returned from his most serious and longest hiatus in early 2021, making the (not so willing) decision to give out the leader position to Minwoo, all without notifying Seo CEO first, made him public enemy number #2, and it definitely showed on his sudden erasure of schedules.
Haegon: From pretty much day one, Haegon was not taken seriously by anyone inside New Wave Music as an Idol or person, specially in Seo Chanhyuk's eyes: his very unsettling attachment to former member Beomseok paired with his short temper painted him as a kid unwilling to grow up, and when Beomseok left and Haegon put up a whole dissapearing stunt for a week (he had to be fake announced to be put on hiatus!), any slight interest or patience Seo Chanhyuk had for him died. Dare I say, Seo CEO saw Haegon as his biggest signing mistakes, when you take into consideration that "he wasn't even good enough to make the main vocalist stay" - his own words! So Haegon was not encouraged to train beyond his habilities or given any sort of solo schedules. Haegon himself felt the company's disbelief in him in his bones, too, and found it hard to try.
Haruki: Despite being made the public face of LOOPiN from 2021 and onwards, and eventually starting as a model with a lot of company apparent support (big highlight on apparent), Haruki was not the target of favoritism in the slightest; it was the very opposite. None of the investment made by New Wave towards Haruki was genuine, made to be long term or took what he wanted to do as an artist into consideration. It was just Seo CEO buying his silence about his horrible involvement with Sangwon without explicitly saying to Haruki that he was buying his silence. Haruki also never had freedom of movement from the moment he became a Week Boy, and even small decisions he had the impression of being made without Sangwon's involvement over the years always ended up with his involvement despite his demands for the contrary, because Seo CEO did not care or respect him, ever. (Which is in my humble opinion one of his worst crimes: knowing and doing nothing for a share price. Fuck that man, honestly, fuck him.)
And in the lowest of lows, Dylan: In the old blog I had a piece that was fully narrated by Chihoon, and in it we caught a glimpse of the situation with his private contract under New Wave Music and by extension, Blockberry Creative; how his trainee dept was thrice everyone's size because he lost a private defamation lawsuit against both companies back when he was on Boy Of The Week, plus one claiming neglect from Seo CEO directly. Dylan's contract as a whole was barely legal and made by a lawyer that was at the time Seo CEO's wife-to-be (🥴), and the disparity definely showed as LOOPiN went on. Mind you: his first ever solo project (given how he did not promote his debut track 'Monster' or 'Teenager' with LOOPiN Look(a)Like due to an hospitalization), was his rebellion album released in 2022, and that obviously had no company support. Dylan also was on the down low obligated to see a 'company psychiatrist', something that is exclusive to him and was as shady as it fucking sounds - a lot of his growing paranoia as his career goes on it's not only caused by the things he becomes a witness to, but also the bad intentioned changes made in his medication.
#&& ⠀ [ . . . ] hound on a hunt ⠀⸻ development .#this is a mega merge of 3 things I wanted to do. I'm crazy but I am free.#fictional idol community#kpop oc#kpop fanfic#kpop au#fake kpop group
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hiiii!! i'm sorry to hear you're not doing well right now, but you're definitely an appreciated face on my home page
1) i haven't watched much of the criminal minds reboot. i think i watched the first two episodes? but i don't like it. i think the reboot lays into the things i don't like about the show (gory deaths, really unhinged murderers, poor representations of people with mental health issues) while ignoring things i do like about the show (steady character development and family time, morgan, hotch, and reid being there >:( and an interesting analysis into what makes normal people do bad things, not what makes people run multi-level marketing murder schemes[???]). but i also have not seen enough of it to justify any stronger opinion than "i don't like reboots and this will not be an exception"
2) not really a headcanon, as much as an analysis of the show that my friend and i were talking about. but we both genuinely think that garcia and morgan would have ended up together if garcia was skinny...which is garbage because i absolutely LOVE their relationship, and i feel like it did not get any solidity or closure. also reid is bisexual and prentiss is a lesbian and jj is "good luck, babe" chappell roan-coded
3) a femme penelope garcia icon would be...kinda awesome 👉👈🥺
4) again, prentiss + jj = good luck, babe. idk what else to tell you
5) reid x morgan college au rivals to lovers shenanigans would make a great fic
6) comet and koshi (two of my five cats)
7) read any good books recently? i'm reading who's afriad of gender? by judith butler right now, and i'm really enjoying it
hope all of this keeps you busy and makes you happy! feel better soon <3
Let me start by saying this was such a great message to read when I was very sick and very sad. THANK YOU!!! I finally have recovered enough to have half a brain cell so I can reply. <3
1) Tell me what you think of the reboot
I am RIGHT THERE with you friend. I think the reboot has really destroyed a lot of the characters (namely Garcia who is unrecognizable in terms of characterisation in CME) and especially in regards to this season, they made an unsub a main cast member?! So we have SOOOOO much of Elias Voit and so LITTLE of the characters we're here to see. I would trade all of his screentime for one look into what Luke and Emily do outside of the office tbrh (yes, the promo for this week has Emily at home for the first time in the whole reboot, but that's beside the point). I'm def not a fan of CME and I wish the show would have just ended in 2020 and that was that. But since it didn't and because my soul is eternally bound to this fandom, here we are. Thank god for fanfic.
2) Tell me your CM headcanons
"we both genuinely think that garcia and morgan would have ended up together if garcia was skinny…which is garbage because i absolutely LOVE their relationship"
YOU ARE SO RIGHT! They had so much potential and I'll forever ship Morcia and I agree the fact they would be an interracial couple with a fat babe involved was probably part of the reason they never dated. -- That being said, I DO appreciate that they never dated. Because I think it's quite rare to see loving, supportive, flirty, PLATONIC friendships between men and women on TV. Not every m/f duo needs to end up together, I think we definitely need more representation of m/f best friends.
"also reid is bisexual and prentiss is a lesbian and jj is "good luck, babe" chappell roan-coded"
100% correct on all accounts. The way I HOWLED with laughter at "JJ is good luck babe coded" lmaaaaaaaaaooooooooo
3) Request pride icons
When you say 'femme Garcia' which flag are you meaning? Happy to make the icon just wanna get the pride flag right (bc I know there's tons of different flags!).
4) Tell me songs that remind you of your ships
"again, prentiss + jj = good luck, babe. idk what else to tell you"
They are so many songs on that album. Jemily is also very 'Casual' and 'Coffee' too.
5) Give me fic prompts
"reid x morgan college au rivals to lovers shenanigans would make a great fic"
Fun fact, while Fooled Around (and Fell in Love) focuses mainly on JJ/Tara/Emily -- Derek and Reid are important side characters. And they were college acquaintances (established in Part 2)! And they both have dated the same guy (Luke) anddddd they are navigating polyamory together in Part 3. So you may enjoy that series.
6) Tell me about your pets
I love your cats!! I had 5 cats at one point. That's the dream! Tell them all they're so good and fluffy and I love them.
7) Ask personal questions
"read any good books recently? i'm reading who's afriad of gender? by judith butler right now, and i'm really enjoying it"
I've been reading my book copies of Fooled Around! I'm on the final book (I split the series into 4 books) and I'm trying to make it last as long as possible. I only have a couple of chapters left but having physical copies of something I wrote is SO cool. It's brought me a lot of joy and has helped me take pride in what I write!
#anxious-multishipper#reply post#criminal minds#cm evolution#cm commentary#jemily jams#faafil#about me 2k24#long post
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OKAY, FINALLY DOING THE AU THING BUT AS BULLET POINTS;
The Hamilton AU:
- Janus found Virgil randomly and adopted him
- Logan was kinda a lawyer
- Remus worked overseas/wasn’t pictured much but it was mentioned he might’ve been serving in the military or somethin’
- Patton and Roman were friends
- Roman was married to someone else, a woman, who would help hide him and she had a daughter from a pervious relationship so he stepped into the dad role for her
- Logan was more of the “you did WHAT?” kind of guy and I forget who did what but they needed a lawyer and Patton found him and he was just like ..*sigh* why… (could’ve sworn it was Roman or Virgil)
- Janus took care of Virgil and was his dad and was protective
- I listed to Satisfied a lot and it became Roman’s song (basically)
- -100/10 I’m afraid of judgement although it was interesting
(This one was created in like late 2020 so judge my past self, not my current self please, I know it’s awful already)
Fantasy;
- ALL TIME FAVORITE AU
- Basically, everything that has happened in Sanders Sides did actually happen here
- There was this door at the very edge of the imagination (imagination is like this cool garden)
- When you go through it there’s this new world with like Dragons and waterfalls and mountains
-In the AU, there’s a person who is part dragon and has wings but is human and she hides from everyone cuz she’s scared
- Then it turns out that her own brother who’s not part dragon is totally against her and betrays her and the entire world there so she has to finally talk to someone
-She gets Roman and he relays it and everyone’s like “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US SOONER????” towards her (there’s a lot of what the hell moments in my AUs)
- 8/10 love this one because of how pretty the other world was
This one was created summer of 2021 and 90% created while I was swinging and spacing out
Mystery/Secret/Split AU;
- This one I still sometimes incorporate into current ones!
-Basically, at one point, the light sides and dark sides were friends and all lived in the same area- no need for travel they were all there
- Janus and Patton were both the leaders of them
- Then they started arguing and it all broke into two- Janus being the leader of the Darksides and Patton the light sides
- They were all young when it happened but Remus and Roman remembered playing together and sharing a room as kids
- That area was abandoned
- Then, Roman and Virgil are messing around (present) and find this secret door and open it by stealing Patton’s keys
- Annnnnddd it shuts behind them and they’re stuck but they’re intrigued by what’s there so they look around
- There was a bookshelf, Logan’s, and it was all dusty and cobwebbed
- They keep looking and find Roman and Remus’s old room and remember EVERYTHING
- They get VERY angry
- Meanwhile, everyone’s like “uhh where’d they go??” And Patton realizes that his keys aren’t in his nightstand anymore and Janus scolds him
- Everyone’s trying to lie to Thomas as to why Roman and Virgil aren’t there (a lot of the lies coming from Remus) and he starts to get suspicious
- Roman eventually realizes that the imaginations connect and Patton comes out and realizes what happened
- 10/10 still use it and still like it
Was created also in 2021 but more like fall of 2021 after I had a dream and went HUH THATS COOL I CAN CHANGE SOME PARTS (dream was weird, Roman and Virgil were getting hit by these two kids with like water balloons and then they chased the kids and then Roman threw one back at the kids and they went inside and NOBODY was there and they were freaked out)
I really hope that these don’t like upset anybody- I’ve been timid to share them for that reason, especially the Hamilton one, so I already know there’s some “…” parts but I don’t make AUs like those anymore anyway- but I think I’ll start posting more recent fanfics that I hope to make in order to get better at writing
#logan sanders#patton sanders#remus sanders#roman sanders#sanders sides#virgil sanders#prinxiety#logicality#headcanon#sanders sides au
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I’ve mentioned the young swiftie in my life. She’s a young adult who has grown up on Taylor since she was 6. She loves her with her whole heart and was extremely invested in Toe. I think Taylor’s idea of Joe is her dream man so she really bought into it. Nice, intellectual/well-read, artistic renaissance man, humble, no fragile masculinity. You get the idea. She was very sad over the break up 7 months ago.
Then Matty showed up. She is a mild fan of The 1975, so she knew about Matty and thought he was terrible and was not happy at all about it. At some point she mentioned maybe it was just for PR ( I think someone else planted that idea.) she hung onto that idea but expressed a lot of concern about Taylor’s character if she would date a man like that.
She’s heard rumors of her being a bit fruity and I think she thinks it’s probably true but absolutely 100% believes in Toe and hasn’t talked about her bearding, just dating for PR more as a regular celebrity like a Kardashian might do. I do not talk about Taylor being gay and bearding with her. I’ve never mentioned it once, I have always indulged her toe fantasies because it’s nice. It doesn’t hurt anything at all.
But the thing with Matty really shook her. When they broke up she moved on but I think she had been exposed to a lot of the negative stuff that was going around after Matty. Her silence on politics. Working with That Director, etc… and we talked about it just a tiny bit. It seems her Pollyanna view of Taylor had been a little bit tarnished because of Matty specifically because it exposed her to this other stuff. But they broke up and we all moved on and we didn’t really talk about Taylor again much.
But then last night I happened to be with her during the concert. I knew she wasn’t super thrilled with Travis (she sees him as a meathead and not attractive at all. She’s more into the Timothee Chalemet type.) And I told her about Taylor changing the guy on the screen coming home to me to “guy in the chiefs coming home to me,” and let me tell you, I’ve known her throughout her teen years, but when I say she gave me the BIGGEST eyeroll that’s ever been rolled. I laughed and said “yeah it’s a bit extra” and then she just went on this rant. It was fascinating.
Basically she told me that ever since Matty, she’s had to reconcile with herself that Taylor is not the person she thought she was. Keep in mind that throughout her teen years, Taylor was with Joe, so that’s the Taylor she knows. The Taylor that spoke out in 2018-2020 as well, just as she was growing into her own political mind and out there at women’s rights and anti-gun and BLM protests. She basically said “I think there’s a 50-50 chance Taylor is a sociopath” (in all seriousness, not joking around like we do.) We talked about her being a bit messed up by fame and how she has to compartmentalize her public and private lives in order to stay sane. Then she said “but has she? Stayed sane? I don’t think so.” I mentioned about how Taylor has said her life makes her sometimes question if she’s a real person and she’s admitted struggling with this, and all this did was confirm to her that yes, she may very well be a psychopath, and she specifically clarified to me that she meant “evil” psychopath. I tried to be nice and say that her actions generally were pretty benign even if she has a bit of that tendency, and she was unconvinced (see above for the problematic stuff.)
Then I said, “yeah I think about some of this a lot. And you know what, when you hear Dear Reader in this context, it really hits home.” And she said. “Yes! I love that song...”
And that was the end of the conversation. But what I really wanted to say is “but if she’s closeted, she looks a lot more sympathetic and a lot of this makes a lot more sense.”
Maybe that conversation will come in time.
#true story#we used psychopath and sociopath interchangeably because neither of us is board certified#to be clear I don’t think Taylor is a psychopath#but the things she does. the way her whole public life is a performance. it’s not healthy.
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The cult needs to STFU. Even if Jikook aren't dating, he has shown up more for Jk, then anyone lately. Who went to be with Jk during his single release in NY & Silver Day? Jimin. Who didn't? Who was first to post about Jk's BB 100? Jimin. Who didn't? Who was first to congratulate Jk on his bday? Jimin. Who didn't? Who came live to tell us to keep wishing for Jk's birthday? Jimin. Who didn't? Who was with JK on White Day in 2022? Jimin. Who wasn't? Who visited JK in his comments on White Day live 2023 when JK was alone, even tho he himself was out of the country and busy & when others were actually in Korea and didn't see JK? Oh that's right, Jimin. You know the live where JK was lonely, sad, crying, bringing up GCF Tokyo trip, playing There for You, spoiling all of Jimin's songs, even playing JVKE, knowing it was about to be released Jimin was working with him. Spoiling Set Me Free part 2 and then eventually told us to look forward to it. It was Jimin again and again and again. Where was Tae during all this? Since they want to always drag Tae into Jikook's business. Where was Tae last year on JK's bday? So Tae flew 14 hours from Washington to go straight to his friends premiere off the plane, but couldn't go see JK on his bday, after a 14 hour flight, his married partner he shares two adopted kids with? I guess between spending time with JN his GF in NY (since she was there when Tae was) and that 14 hour flight home, he just didn't have any more energy to go his husband. Where was Tae during JK's 2020 birthday? Oh yeah, at home asking Jimin to come sleep with him instead. Tae loves JK okay. You don't have to tell us. We know they do, but they aren't fucking and they aren't dating. They are friends. And honestly, if I were you, I'd just shut my fucking mouth about Jikook, because if this really was a dick measuring contest, which Taekookers try to make it out to be on which duo is more gay and has more potential to be real, sorry, but Taekook are coming in last. Vmin have a more real chance of being real over Taekook, considering Tae actually writes songs about Jimin and said he likes him the most. Clowns. All of them. So, no amount of TK Premiere appearances or bowling with friends, will ever change the fact that Tae just went public with JN in Paris, holding her hand, after nearly 2 years of dating proofs of them were leaked. Don't ever fucking speak on Jimin or Jikook again. Not while one half of your ship is in a now made public relationship, done on purpose by both Tae and JN. Losers. You got bigger things to worry about, then Jikook.
Oh and get your damn lies straight while you're at it. JK didn't hear Tae's album first. JK never once said this. Stop making up shit. He said he heard it. It was Jimin in 2022 Festa who said he and Tae had a listening party TOGETHER and Tae played him all his songs first. So sorry cult, soulmate is the one who actually heard his album first, confirmed by Vmin. It was Jimin and Tae agreed. But guess what else. Tae was with JN like 3 days after that Festa Dinner filmed, so he probably played them all for her too, while they were caught by a local in the car together on their Jeju date. Better luck next time losers.
Hi anon,
Agree with everything!
Tkkrs should be the last people celebrating anything right now.
Their ship never sailed to begin with.
The interactions between Tae and Jk have always been because they are friends. There is nothing else other than a friendship bond.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
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waterparks // rock sound awards 2021
(full text under the cut)
WATERPARKS
CLASS OF 2021 ARTIST OF THE YEAR
WORDS: JAMES WILSON-TAYLOR PHOTOS: JAWN ROCHA
Another album, another lap around the world…another year that very much felt like it belonged to Waterparks. Their exponential growth continued this year with a new label deal and their latest and absolutely greatest record.
They began 2021 in isolation putting the finishing touches to 'Greatest Hits', and end it off the back of a triumphant, huge North American tour, by way of big, big festival slots and the realisation of more ideas than even they might have thought possible.
Here, Awsten Knight looks back on the journey he and his bandmates Geoff Wigington and Otto Wood have been on over the past 12 months, and faces towards the future.
How has your 2021 been, Awsten? It seems like a lot of bands have understandably found this year to be way more productive than last…
"It's better, but it's been equally productive. In 2020 I still made over 100 songs. Still recorded all of 'Greatest Hits'—it was pretty much done by January—made the DVD, 'FANDOM: LIVE IN THE UK'… that took like, five or six months. Yeah, 2020 was still super productive and then obviously this year…album release, making a million more videos, playing shows. That's why I say it's equal."
Was there any transitional period for you, or were you just straight into work mode?
"It never stopped. And I'm not saying this is necessarily a good thing, but I just can't stop working. It's very hard for me to stop. Sometimes I actively try to just because, but I feel like I just operate better if I'm working on things. The thing is, at least if we are out doing shows, I'm not writing songs because of it. But last year I didn't have an excuse."
'Greatest Hits' was of course released this year. You've talked before about wanting to better yourself with each album, but what's interesting is it feels like the leaps between each record are now getting bigger too…
"I'm very about smooth transitions between stylistic stages. It feels very inorganic if somebody has screamo, alternative rock and then they try and go full pop. It's like you didn't do it naturally, so it feels disingenuous. I also think that I was more impatient being stuck at home. And on top of that, since I had more time to create and just make weird sounds and demo things out, I got to learn a lot and hit a lot of things that I wouldn't have necessarily found so soon. So I think it's a combination of those things. This gave a lot of time for me to find the most weird, left of centre, out of pocket stuff. I can't tell you how many Halloween sounds I went through making 'See You In The Future'. Sorry, 'See You In In The Future."
It's funny hearing you talk about acts earning that change in sound. It's like you are world-building but it's about the musical sounds rather than characters or stories…
"Yeah, and wanting to make as many different styles as you can. Because when it stops being fun or fresh or exciting, I don't wanna do it. Touring itself is very fun and rewarding, but it can also get monotonous. So if you are not pushing the boundaries everywhere you can, whether its sonically or show production or whatever… I mean, you see how easily I get distracted. I won't want to do it if it's not fun. You know who has got the best transition between that I think I've ever seen? Like, as far as musical styles go as a band? Bring Me The Horizon. I know where they started and watching them go to 'That's The Spirit' and even the stuff they are putting out right now… it changes style-wise so much. Not only is it consistent, but it changes and I think thats awesome. Not a lot of bands are willing to do that in case it feels like they are putting on somebody else's clothes. But they've done it in a very smooth way."
"WHEN IT STOPS BEING FUN OR FRESH OR EXCITING, I DON'T WANNA DO IT"
"I THINK BEING ALONE ALL THE TIME MADE ME WANT TO COLLABORATE MORE…"
Was there anything specific on 'FANDOM' that you wanted to improve on or push further this time around?
"I don't wanna compare songs especially because if you compare old things to new things, just because of how nostalgia works, it'll never compare until more time has gone by. But if I can sit down and look at 'Numb' vs 'Watch What Happens Next… They're both cool, they both have interesting pre-choruses in very different ways. One of them is more drawly, very minimal and then the other is a little hip-hoppy but more in a Beastie Boys kind of way. Then that outro is from hell, just crazy. I love the vocal patterns in it, in the b-section. And then I'll look at 'Watch What Happens Next' and compare those patterns. I look at things like that. What stuff got added in that's special? What are the special elements that aren't just guitar, bass, drums? I compare stuff like that a lot. Some songs are written where it's like, 'This one will have a pit'. Some songs it's like, 'This is for people who don't even fuck with us, but it has such a groove'. Or, 'This one is a dark 'Life Of Pablo'-type production that's dark and evil but expensive-sounding'. There's just certain things I wanted to accomplish and especially at that time, during recording, being stuck at home, I needed to do what's going to make me feel fulfilled right now."
You seem to be in a very collaborative mood too with the guests on the album and then things outside the album like the track you did with DE'WAYNE. Is that collaborative spirit something you are becoming more open to?
"Yes, definitely. I think being alone all the time made me want to collaborate more. And then also I feel like, and I hope this comes off okay… as good as I feel like I am at writing and production and finding creative ways to do things, I know that other people are so much better than me at other things. I don't wanna be the fucking best in the room at everything, because then why am I in this room? When I gave 'Crying Over It All' to Zeph, I didn't give very much instruction. I was like, 'Just add harmonies, do your thing, pretty freeform, just go for it'. Because when I listen to her stuff, she'd always send me demos or even on her Instagram stories she'll post the acapellas of stuff she is working on. There's like twenty layers of vocals and they are doing these random swells and all this cool shit and I'm just like, 'Woah, that's insane'. So when she sent back all of the vocals for that, it was the same kind of thing. And that's not something I would have thought of. It's no longer me sitting at this desk right here working on 'Double Dare' or 'Entertainment. I think you can only go so far alone and if you happen to have friends and people you like around you who are incredible at other things, I don't see why you wouldn't collab with them. At the end of the day, all I want is the best album in the world."
It felt like that spirit of collaboration had disappeared in the scene for a while but is now coming back around again, which is great because, like you say, everyone benefits from that…
"Yeah that's totally true. And at least for me, I felt like I had something to prove, especially early on. Because we did… we had a lot to prove. But I think, maybe in an ego sense, or I don't know what it was, but I took a lot of pride in it. We'd meet people in other bands who were bigger than us and they'd go, 'Is it true that you had no co-writes or people working on this or anything?' But in the grand scheme of things, we're not shit. In the world of music, most people don't even know we exist. But I feel like that thing - that weird alternative music mindset. Some, 'Us against the world, got to prove yourself' type of shit - I don't really have that anymore. And I'm glad, because it's not productive, it's not helpful, it's not gonna make you have a better album. I feel like alternative music, as stubborn as everybody is, I think they are probably seeing how good collabs are in hip-hop, or how Spotify works and are like, 'Oh shit, we should do that"." You've always talked about personal stuff within your lyrics but it feels like on 'Greatest Hits', you were a lot more open and direct.
What do you think has changed in your approach to lyrics?
"I think there's multiple reasons for it. I think most people just don't look that deep into stuff and I want them to know what I'm talking about. 'Entertainment… that whole fucking album is metaphors. The whole thing. And I think with stuff like 'Turbulent', that was in a way more cathartic. This isn't an objective truth or anything, this is just for me, but I think it's more cathartic to be blunt. And thats not to say metaphors or keeping things poetic isn't good. I want to still use metaphors, part of me wants to lean a little more on that. There's just something very cathartic about just saying it. 'LIKE IT'… just getting to talk shit for verses and I had even more verses written but I just wanted it to be like a punk song. A very grungy, punk kind of thing. It was just more of a release. People that are very into the band will look more deep into things but sometimes I just want someone who hears ten seconds on Tik Tok to know what the fuck I'm talking about. Lyrically, I didn't want to waste any time, I just wanted to get to it."
'Double Dare' celebrated its fifth anniversary this year. Is there anything about the creative process back then that still applies to how you work now?
"Honestly, it's the same. Sit down, laptop, guitar, keyboard, bass, mic. Shut everything out, start making shit. What is made has changed, but the process is the same."
Is there anything you wish you knew back then that you know now?
"All I would do if I could go back is just give them a mixing budget. Because I wouldn't change anything. I like some of the songs more than others but I still think they should all exist. We made the whole album for like, $10,000. Some people might hear that and think it's a lot, but it's not. For making an album, especially on a label, thats nothing. If we could get a Zakk Cervini mix, like a remix…"
When it came to the live show, this tour seems to match this new era in feel. How did you approach bringing 'Greatest Hits' to the stage?
"We went through a lot of different stages with the production. This was the first idea - I want it to make it look like thunder if we want to, make it really dark and moody, no lights around us just silhouettes and bits of lightning, because it's just a full cloud wall, so we can be in a storm like we are going to die or it can glow gold like we are in heaven, or like a sunset. Somebody actually asked me at a Q&A the other day about the symbolism of the doors onstage and I think being in my apartment so much for that long, I was always just looking at them. It felt right to bring the three doors hovering in the clouds. We had the red, yellow and blue bikes because that was my only escape during it. I could come up with crazy production all day, but you also have to take into consideration the rooms you are doing. Is it indoor, outdoor, 500 people, 2,000 people…You base these things on that. What can work in different ways. I think it's the most fitting and conceptually it's probably the best pairing we could have had visually with this album. But some day I think it would be so cool, when we get to do those fucking arena shows, to collab with someone who has done it a million times. The first time or two around, you don't understand the capabilities of what can and can't be done. You don't know what your limits are, so you just kind of be safe. So I'm excited to eventually start collabing with someone on that."
As things get bigger, it feels like the rooms are starting to match your ambition. Is there a pressure to scale things up?
"There's not really a pressure. I just don't think about it like that. The other night, and this hasn't happened in forever, but right before going on I had this weird moment where I felt like I'd re-entered my body. They were already playing 'Greatest Hits' and the first song is about to start and I felt like I'd re-entered. I glanced at the audience and thought, 'Oh god'. Fucking freaked out. Like, 'What the fuck am I doing?' I say that because the best thing you can do is not think. If you just show up and do it, cool shit gets done. If you think about it, if you analyse it, you psych yourself out."
"I NEEDED TO DO WHAT'S GOING TO MAKE ME FEEL FULFILLED RIGHT NOW"
"SOMETIMES I JUST WANT SOMEONE WHO HEARS TEN SECONDS ON TIKTOK TO KNOW WHAT THE FUCK I'M TALKING ABOUT"
It was also great to see you be joined again by Mikey Way during this tour…
"I know man, that was so cool. We're always talking about when we can do stuff because he loves playing shows and he fucks with Waterparks and stuff which is so crazy. I was in Nashville a month before the tour and we hung out and got dinner, and he's like, 'Dude, I wanna play one of these shows'. And he's gonna be in Nashville so I'm like, 'How about Nashville? And anything else you wanna do'. And he's like, 'Definitely Nashville and I'd love to do more'. I was like, 'You let me know what you wanna play and we'll switch up the set after'. That was so fun. He is one of the nicest fucking people in this world. He's in the biggest rock band in the world and does not act like it. He's so humble and so nice. He's just a good dude."
Looking forward, what do you think are the biggest things you learned in the process of making 'Greatest Hits"?
"I definitely don't wanna talk too much, especially as I don't know way too much, but I think that the one drawback that I've had with 'Greatest Hits'… it's not even a drawback with 'Greatest Hits', it's just the way in which it was consumed. I think that because it's so long, and not even long runtime wise… It's just that 17 tracks is intimidating to some, especially if you are not a diehard listener. I think some songs got overlooked, or under-appreciated. There are certain ones where I wonder how long it's gonna stay underrated. The production on 'See You In The Future' is fucking insane but its not even in the top seven of the most listened to. Or 'Magnetic'. Or 'Crying Over It All' is I think one of the best songs Waterparks has ever put out. They just get overlooked. 'American Graffiti', I kind of made that song as I was frustrated one night at how dogshit a lot of alt rock stuff that was coming out at the time was. I was just like, 'This is so uninspired, I'm just gonna make the way fucking cooler version of what these people are trying to do. I'm gonna do the perfect mix of Jimmy Eat World and Death Cab and all these people. And then just throw in some real wild production'. That outro is so fucking pretty. I feel like a lot of those get overlooked because theres so much. And there's a lot we can't put in the set because it's literally 17 songs. We're already playing for an hour and a half every night, which is a lot. We're not playing six of the songs because theres not even time. What I'm getting at is, the next album will probably be more…I don't wanna say concise, because it's not like 'Greatest Hits' isn't. It definitely goes on more tangents because that was the point. But it'll probably be shorter."
It certainly feels like alt.rock is the place where the album is king. In hip-hop you can release singles all the time, EPs, whatever you want. Is that something you've thought about in terms of release structure?
"I'm cool with singles. I don't really wanna do EPs anymore. Mainly because I'd rather just do four singles or release them as a pair. Because then if somebody hates one, they'll probably like the other. But I think that I would probably just do singles or pairings then drop another album."
What is on the to-do list for 2022?
"We are coming to Europe. We've got some more shows that we are gonna announce soon. Some places we've never been before. We've locked in support, haven't announced it yet but its gonna be very cool. We're playing that London show—insane. I wish I could say more. It's gonna be a good year."
Waterparks' latest album 'Greatest Hits' is out now via 300 Entertainment. They're due to tour the UK next summer.
#ugh some of these quotes about the next album and tiktok....famous last words#waterparks#awsten knight#geoff wigington#otto wood#i.zip
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warning: mention of blackface,cultural appropiation,racism,grooming.
Thank Godness,my 10 year old self never knew Colleen Ballinger or her character Miranda sing because I guess she wasn't popular enough to reach Latam kids that didn't know English. I'm really thankful for grewing up with German Garmendia and his sketchs, Yuya and her make up tutorials, and hispanic amor doce gameplay YouTubers,etc.
Because how the fuck did Millenials or anyone else enjoy this woman's content in general and let her get away with this shit?
The picture on the left is of Colleen Ballinger with a fake headdress made of paper that is supposed to look like a Native American headdress?.
As far as I heard, native American headdresses are supposed to be very sacred and this lady right here chose to do this, made of paper, to mock it?
In the picture on the right, she's imitating Beyonce's performance of "Single Ladies" while doing blackface. The public wasn't saying "what the fuck is this" "lady,stop it,that's fucked up" they were cheering at her, and for the people who are saying "it was another time." Please, it wasn't 100 years ago; it was in 2018, 5 years ago. Everyone knows blackface is wrong. Years of black people telling everyone how wrong it was to do it Another thing is you choose to ignore it.
Oh,how I can forget her video of her stereotyping Latinos?
as a latina, this is very cringe to look at,and it's offensive.
And some clips of her making nasty suspicious comments are popping out on my fyp bc ppl are commenting on those clips,and her nasty behaviour really was in plain sight.
I can't believe how some ppl believed hee in 2020 and make a 17 year old Adam deactive his comment section bc of the harrasment, when he show conversations and multiple proof of her being nasty,and it's really great and refreshing seeing him stronger and getting ppl to believe him.
And her ass apology song, "not a groomer,just a loser 🥺" like lady, GROOMERS ARE LOSERS.
"toxic gossip train" my ass, celebrities after doing fucked up stuff are always like "cancel culture is toxic,don't let others grow put of their mistake" like u are not getting cancelled for saying x shit, u are getting DRAGGED FOR RACISM AND GROOMING MINORS,WHICH ARE CRIMES BTW.
and ppl calling Adam "whining dude" are the reason why men don't talk about their grooming or SA traumatic experiences.
He isn't whining, he is spreading awareness about her creepy persona. And he has right to be angry or "whiny" imagine a 13 year old working and managing an account of a celebrity FOR FREE,NOT PAY STUFF. getting manipulated to defend her,and being asked inappropiate questions, getting sent underwear... that's nasty.
Istg she gets worse everytime,hope she goes to jail or sm.
#miranda sings#coleen ballinger#coleen ballinger is a groomer#grooming#racism#adam mcintyre#colleen ballinger#native american#black#latino
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