#Weird Al has been a staple in my life since I was old enough to comprehend music

[running-tweezers]

Weird Al announced a new tour next year and the show local to me is ON MY BIRTHDAY

This feels like fate. My ass will BE THERE

[jangofctts]

As You Are (Bucky Barnes x fem!reader)

Rated: Mature, Explicit 18+

Word Count: 6.4k

Warnings: smut, explicit language, mentions of alcohol, mentions of violence and injuries, light choking, brief thigh riding/grinding, vaginal fingering with them metal fingies, oral female receiving, unprotected vaginal sex (dont be a dick, wrap that stick), fucking on sam’s couch

a/n: ok hi this fic is very self indulgent bUT YKNOW WHAT WHO CARES EKJHEJHKEJH this is my first fic for marvel and AH I hope I did Bucky justice. ENJOY YALL

This had been a terrible idea. 

Right from the minute you tailed after he and Sam to the Baron’s extensive vintage car storage. Bucky had explicitly withheld any and all information regarding this little excursion to protect you but of course you’d shown up—none too jazzed about the little stunt Bucky pulled regarding the Baron. Fair. 

You were right—Bucky should have called but that overwhelming guilt of dragging you into another one of his problems stopped him from pressing that little call button. He never wanted to be the reason you ended up back on the run again. Though judging by the way things were going, it was more than likely you’d be in prison by the end of the week. 

Luck had your back in that sort of regard—too bad it could never rescue you from your own stubbornness and grief regarding that damn shield. 

You’d taken a devastatingly hard hit from Walker—a fractured orbital, a split lip and a dislocated shoulder. All preventable—if only Bucky kept better track of you before you showed up in that warehouse alone. Left to fight the shadow of what was once a symbol of hope for some—another man playing dress-up in something that will never belong to him. 

It was just their luck Bucky and Sam arrived in time—preventing you from becoming another red stain of violence splattered over that shield. 

James Buchanan Barnes is not afraid of much—but fuck. Seeing you crumpled over the concrete floor, all bloodied and struggling to raise a hand to protect your face… It was the same feeling as injecting his veins with a pure shot of adrenaline and anger shrouded in fear. He promised Steve he’d look after you… 

And as Sam carried you out of that warehouse you had the gall to tenderly tell them that you were just fine—as if your mouth weren’t full of blood and a face blooming with patchy bruises. The jealousy that sparked through Bucky���s chest when you clung to Sam’s chest did nothing to help that dark festering pit inside his ribcage he’s attempting to suture back together.

Bucky clenches his jaw. At least you’re asleep now. Curled up against the window, holding your injured arm in a way that limited the turbulence from jostling it. It’s the first time Bucky would describe you as fragile. He know’s you’re anything but that—stubborn mostly—yet most of all brave. It’s what Steve admired most about you—what Bucky loves most about you too. That vibrant spark flowing through your blood and how you’re not afraid to shout along to your favorite songs despite the odd looks you get. Bucky envies how self-assured you are, how you’ll never lose yourself because you know just where you’re headed. He wishes he still had that sort of drive instead of all this uncertainty and guilt clouding each muscle and fibre in his body.      

Bucky doesn’t realize the jet has landed until Sam stands and and places a large hand over your shoulder. Your face scrunches as you whine and curl further into your seat. “C’mon, kiddo.” You grumble something inaudible. “You want me to carry you?”

The delicate plates of vibranium clink together as Bucky’s hand tightens into a fist, jealousy flaring hot and bright. He quickly stands, too fast to be considering anything less than awkward. Sam’s brow quirks. “I can do it.”   

“It’s cool, man,” Sam says as he scoops one arm under your legs and the other around your back. “I got her.”

Bucky bristles. Whatever. 

It’s not like you and him have anything together. A one sided plague of affection that you’ll never know about—he wants to tell you. Fuck, the words burn through his tongue and collect like ashes between his teeth and yet they are never voiced from self sabotage. There’s no possible way to voice how you’ve haunted his thoughts and his dream since the moment his eyes met yours. How he’s memorized the lines of your smile and the sweet sound of your laugh, the sweep of your lashes and the rhythm of your steps. Bucky would know you deaf, blind, numb, in this world or any other twisted reality. 

He had said that he wasn’t afraid of much, but that’s not entirely true. Eternity, oblivion, crowded rooms, being alone too long. And you. You terrify him. You have the power to pluck at the very strings of his soul and unravel him completely until he’s no more—and you don’t even know it. Bucky Barnes is less afraid of dying than he is of loosing you but that fear never once provides him the courage to tell you. You may not be a scribbled name in his book, but he still hopes that one day he’ll earn the chance to strike his cowardice and put to rest the wretched ache in his heart that he feels for you. 

He wishes he told you in Wakanda, after the Blip, Riga, and right this instant. He watches Sam carry you out of the jet—what’s a little more time?

                          -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The sun is beginning to melt into the horizon, turning the expanse of water into molten gold and shimmering blues. The hazy humidity from the late afternoon heat collects at the back of Bucky’s neck and the light breeze does nothing to cool. Bucky sighs and swipes at the bead of sweat creeping down his forehead with the back of his hand—he glances up. 

A ghost of a smile creeps across his lips. You’re exactly where he and Sam left you three hours ago. Surprising to be quite honest—you never did like to stay in one place for longer than ten minutes. You’re a pain in his ass, simply said.  

But now—now you’re haphazardly splayed out on the lawn chair you were forced into, a juice box loosely held in your good hand while the other still remains in the sling. He can’t tell if you’re asleep—Steve’s sunglasses do an excellent job of hiding your eyes. Yet as Bucky wanders closer, your head rolls to your right in greeting. 

“It’s rude to stare, y’know,” you grumble, lifting the juice box to your mouth. Your lips purse around the plastic straw. “And before you ask—yes, I have a very important job I’m currently overseeing.”

Bucky quirks a brow. “What—hogging the lawn chair?”

“No—“ You huff. You gesture with your juice box at the large cooler your sandaled feet are propped up on. “I’m the booze master. God of the ale, destroyer of sobriety—“

“Alright, Booze Master,” Bucky interrupts with a snort. “Why don’t you bestow upon me a beer, your majesty.”

You tap your index finger over your chin as a lazy smile fixes itself over your lips. “Granted.”

You slide your legs off the cooler and with a pained grunt you shift forward. Bucky shoots his arm out and steadies you back against the chair by your shoulder before you get any further. Your face pulls into a grimace.

“I got it, kid. Relax.”

Bucky pops open the cooler and fishes out a beer and pops the cap off between his left index finger and thumb. You watch with a frown, “I could’ve done that for you.” 

Bucky resists the urge to roll his eyes and takes a seat on the cooler. The bitter fizz floods his tastebuds as he takes a sip of his drink, a tangible silence blanketing the space between you. He gets it—people like he and you can never settle for complacency. As if the rest isn’t deserved despite the bloody knuckles and the shattered glass that slices through skin—the bruises and the broken bones. None of it is enough—not worthwhile to preserve yourself when other’s so desperately need your help. 

Or maybe it’s penance. 

Bucky sure as shit finds himself swallowed by the black maw of guilt each and every day. Battling the never ending shadow of doubt that clings to his soul like glitter to a an old carpet. Bucky believes it’s safe to say that you’re the same—every good deed you do added to the imaginary scale weighing against the bad despite it feeling hollow and insurmountable. Paying in blood to equate the amount you’ve spilled. A hopeless battle you both insist on fighting. 

Bucky sighs through his nose, bends at the waist and collects both your ankles in his left hand. You let him lift them both and settle your legs over his knees. You shiver, an eruption of goosebumps rushing up your skin at the cold metallic shock of Bucky’s vibranium thumb scrapinh over your bare flesh.

Bucky’s lips tilt down ever so slightly. “Did I hurt you?”

“Never,” you rush to say before he has the chance to flee. “S’just cold.” 

His hum reverberates low in his chest as those cerulean blue eyes fall to his hands. You clench your jaw until your teeth ache as his left thumb continues to stroke over the delicate skin covering the joint of your ankle. This is…new…

You’d been close with Steve and Sam, and by proxy Bucky—in some weird adjunct way. Compared to Sam’s teasing bumps of the shoulder and that infectious laugh far more addicting than the golden liquor of the sun, Bucky is frigid. Still attempting to shake off the whole Winter Soldier thing that’s molded onto his bones like stubborn permafrost. Touch had always been tricky with him—even a friendly pat over the back or a simple tap to the harm had him tensing under the touch—muscle and steel bunching to prepare for a harsh blow that would never arrive. Never from you.         

Bucky rarely sought out your physical comfort—you were always the one to initiate those friendly touches even if he was the type to just sit and ignore you like a grouchy old cat barely clinging onto that ninth life. The first time he breached that fragile barrier was in Wakanda—something in Bucky cracked and split into a cavernous ravine of nebulosity. Stitches shred apart then stapled back together as he grabbed your arm and wrestled you into a bone-crushing hug. You didn’t need to ask to realize he cried the entire time, gripping your shirt like a lifeline while he shuddered and sobbed into the crook of your neck. To him everything from the rain to silk sheets felt like shrapnel and the stars tasted like old blood and the past of things long gone—yet you were familiar. 

A comfort for the much needed healing of the scattered pieces of a man. You don’t mind helping him pick up the tidbits and reattach them with veins of silver. It’s the least you can do. 

The second time occurred after the loss of Steve. Some part of you had been wrenched out with his departure and he never bothered to return it. It doesn’t matter anymore—the hollow ache had been soothed with the Winter Soldier clutching you to his chest until you drifted off into a fitful sleep. A tether to a new reality you both partake in. 

Which brings you to now. There’s no cathartic reasoning behind his touch…it’s simple…a risky leap of faith into unknown territory. Bucky’s eyes lift to meet yours—curiosity swimming in those icy irises. You don’t mind—in fact you quite like the calloused warmth of his hand and the opposing chilly metal one tentatively exploring your exposed skin. 

“You have a scar here,” Bucky murmurs, skimming the thumb made up of flesh and sinew over the mottled skin occupying the crease of where the top of your foot meets your ankle. 

You bite the inside of your cheek. “I fell on barbed wire.”

“Clumsy,” he chides, quirking a dark brow. 

Your shoulders bounce with a huff. “I was like—twelve when it happened, James.”

His mouth quirks in a half smile, quite liking the validation of his name in the way your mouth speaks it. He wonders if you know the weight of granting you that leeway of calling him that. Shit—he doesn’t care what you call him, everything sounds lovely when you say it. 

There’s another silence—holding your breath until something splits and shatters into a million pieces. You’d be a liar if you said you didn’t want anything more than just friendship with Bucky but fear of rejection is a tricky thing. You take the easy way out and offer him the chance of something more on a silver platter. 

“Bucky?”

His fingers whisper up your shin as he inclines his head.              

“I’m tired. Drive me back to Sam’s?”

“Sure thing, doll.” 

                            -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Bucky holds the door open for you as you stumble in, escaping the hazy southern heat. He disappears into the kitchen as you make a beeline straight for the couch, sighing loudly once the plush cushions meet your back. You lazily lift your head once you hear his familiar footfalls nearing. 

With him he brings two Otterpops, one blue raspberry and the other cherry. Once he hands it to you he takes a seat on your left, close enough that his thigh and shoulder bumps against yours. “Don’t tell Sarah’s kids that these were the last ones.”

You roll your eyes and promptly stick the Otterpop into you mouth. “‘M ain’t no snitch.”

His low chuckle reverberates through his chest. The silence that follows isn’t an awkward one as you enjoy the cold treat—it’s filled with the humming cicada bugs outside and the breeze through the wind chimes. Comfortable with the normalcy—just a couple of regular old people enjoying life for a suspended amount of seconds.  

Once you finish the Otter Pop, you crumple the plastic up and rest it on the coffee table. He does the same—hints of the blue syrup sticking to the cracks of his plush lips. You force yourself to avert your eyes. You cheeks heat with a flush as you rush to occupy your mind with anything but wild fantasies of Bucky’s mouth. You lean forward again, pointedly ignoring the way Bucky’s eyes track your movements as you shuck off your sling, the prickle of unused muscles and bruised ligaments rushing through the limb. You wince as you slowly roll your shoulder. 

The muscles in Bucky’s jaw clenches. You sigh—he’s still blaming himself for your injuries. “Does it still hurt?”

“Not everyone has freaky healing powers, Buck,” you snort. You rush to appease him when he frowns. “It’s getting better though. Still can’t sleep on it—but eh.” 

“I’m sorry.”

You bite the inside of your cheek. No matter how many times you tell him he’ll never believe you. That’s something only he can fix. Doesn’t stop you from telling him anyway. “Stop blaming yourself for my idiocy. I made my choice and paid the price for it.”

Bucky’s eyes drop to his hands. “Can’t help it, sweetheart. Steve told me to look after you.”

Your heart constricts within your chest like a fist. You inhale and reach out to rest your hand over his wrist. “Funny—he told me the same thing about you.”

It surprises him—his dark brows furrow as his mouth parts, but nothing comes forth. Grappling with the right words that fit with what he feels. He’s still learning how to give his soul a name that fits. Learning how to take the dark, twisted bramble of his heart and make it into something that doesn’t ache each time it beats. He’s still learning how to look himself in the eyes, point to himself and say that there’s nothing frightening in there. Not anymore. No more. 

You suck in a breath and muster up the embers of courage. Here goes nothing— 

You cup Bucky’s cheek, the scrape of stubble welcome against your warm palm as you gently turn his face to look at you. His eyes drift to yours when the mumbled syllables of his name tumble from your lips. His eyes are framed with dark circles of wildflower bruises, his small smile a moonbeam stark against battered skin. You’ve dreamt so many times of swallowing it whole and pressing him close enough that your heartstrings become entangled with no hope of separation. But that’s something for him to decide. 

You drop your hand cradling Bucky’s jaw, but before your hand completely falls Bucky surges forward. His large hands rush to cup your face, swallowing your noise of surprise as his plush lips fall onto yours. The syrupy flavor of a Blue Raspberry Otter Pop he stole from Sarah’s freezer lingers on Bucky’s mouth, mixed in with the smell of old leather and cracked cardamom. Bucky nips at your bottom lip, tugging once and then rolling it between the blunt enamel of his teeth. Despite all the bad jokes regarding his age and senior citizen status—fuck he’s a damn good kisser. Compared to him you feel clumsy, sloppy, but no matter how hard you search for his distaste he doesn't seem to care in the slightest—if anything he’s pulling you closer. 

Bucky’s kisses may taste like the middle of June and a first love, but desperation lines every action like a wound with jagged edges. It’s a slow process learning to be free, but one day he’ll transform into starlight—and instead of a kiss like fire, it’ll be like touching your lips to a constellation’s aureate mouth.   

When Bucky pulls away, sucking in air and resting his forehead on yours, you catch a whiff of his hair. Freshly washed and smelling a bit like Sam’s shampoo. Your lips quirk. You’ll make sure to keep that a secret from Sam.

You pull back just enough to meet his eye, resting your palm over his vibranium hand that still cups your cheek. “Am I the first person you’ve kissed since the stone ages?”

His lips pull into a cheeky smile. “Maybe.”

You laugh and roll your eyes, skating your palm down the front of his shirt, the heat of his skin near searing through the fabric. “I guess we have a lot of catching up to do, huh?”

Bucky’s lips smother your small moan as he drags you into another kiss. You can feel his smile as he murmurs his agreement between desperate kisses and the enticing warmth of his tongue skimming along yours. The next time you part for air, Bucky drops his strong hands from your face to instead wrap them around the curve of your hips. He tugs you over his right thigh with ease and breathes a gentle sigh of your name, beginning to pepper kisses over you cheek and down the slope of your jaw.

Bucky reaches your ear and carefully nibbles the cartilage, his voice a warm scrape in your ear. “I want you.”

It’s such a simple phrase…and yet…it tears through you and pools like a heavy weight right to your center. “Then take me.”

Quick as a strike of a match, you’re tipped backwards, cradled right between the arm of the couch and the back of it. Heat rushes through each limb and gathers in your cheeks as Bucky’s vibranium fingers skate up your chest and curl around the column of your throat—that hardened soldier he’s tried to bury bleeding through the cracks of his resolve. You don’t care. You gasp into his mouth as he squeezes ever so slightly while he pushes a firm thigh between your legs. Shit—this is how you’re gonna die—grinding on Bucky’s muscled leg while he’s got a hand around your throat. 

What a way to go.    

With his other hand he grips the meat of your thigh and pulls you higher, grinding the rough material of his jeans covering his crotch into yours. You whine and arch into him. You need more. 

You both stay here for a good while up until it feels like you’re ready to burst at the seems if you don’t have him now. Bucky is no better—cheeks flushed as he fumbles with the zipper to relieve the noticeable bulge straining against it. Impatient and needy, you shoo away his hands and do it yourself, easily sliding your warm hand down his navel and over his boxers to palm at his cock. Bucky’s hand twitches around your neck, a sweet groan filling the air when you softly squeeze him through the elastic.

“Fuck, you’re gonna…” Bucky trails off and buries his nose into the crook of your neck. “Gonna make me cum in my pants if you don’t—don’t stop.”

While the thought is tempting, you want this to last just a little bit longer. Rush after the glorious high of just being near him, his kisses, everything about him. Bucky grunts at the loss of your hand and mouths a wet trail of sloppy kisses up your neck and returns to your lips. When you part he sweeps a stray strand of hair and tucks it behind your ear. He smiles softly.

“Can I try something?” He breaths. Before he can even tell you what his idea is, you’re happily nodding along. “Wanna taste you. Been thinking about it ever since Wakanda.”

Oof. His words shoot straight your center. “Bucky—why didn’t you say anything sooner?”

His mouth quirks. “You make me nervous.”

Rolling your eyes you plant a kiss on his forehead and grant him his simple desire. Bucky sits and slides to the floor, close enough that he’s still able to hover over you. You lift your hips as Bucky tugs your shorts and underwear down and off your legs. Besides the general anxieties of being half naked in front of an incredibly attractive man and performing something so sinful on a friend’s couch—there’s a strange stroke of pride that alights through each of your vertebrae. A powerful man willingly dropping to his knees to please you. 

Bucky shoots you a smile and slides his hands around your ribcage, bends forward slightly and captures you mouth in a deep kiss. He parts and nips down your jaw and over your throat, sliding his tongue over the marks he leaves with his teeth as if to soothe the slight sting. You whine and arch into him as he slides lower, leaving an obvious trail of bruises and teeth marks in his wake until he reaches the collar of your shirt. Bucky moves his palms under the fabric to grab at your breasts, the flats of his fingertips rolling over your nipples that peak through your bra. You suck in a shaky breath when Bucky catches the pebbled bud between his forefinger and thumb, the hard vibranium of his fingers scraping over it. A low hum rumbles through his chest as he leans forward to playfully nip at your collarbone.

“I wanna see you naked.” Bucky admits as he slips his hands out of your shirt. You shiver as those chilly metal fingers gently come to rest on the outside of your bare thighs. 

“Not here, Buck,” you sigh. “T-they—fuck—they can come back any minute.”

Bucky quirks a brow, eyes dropping between your legs, then back up with a smirk. His plush lips part, yet before he can disprove your silly point—that your bare ass is already out and taking off the shirt would barely make a difference—you interject. 

“Shut up.”

His shoulders bounce with a chuckle. “You have such a way with words, y’know that?”

You make a noise low in your throat and reach out to sharply tug his ear. He easily bats your hand aside, hooks his hands under your ass and hauls until you’re all but hanging over the edge of the cushions. You squirm, unable close your legs or to relieve some of that burning tension collecting in your core as Bucky lowers himself and wedges his shoulder between your thighs. He slides his hand over your calfs and wrestles them over his broad shoulders—earning a perfect view of your pussy. You’re already wet—worked up and running on borrowed time. You roll your head back onto the back of the couch and clench your jaw. You don’t want to rush him but Christ—you really don’t want Sam or Sarah to find you like this.   

It feels like ages before Bucky’s lips touch your belly and then your navel with his warm tongue. With a grunt he shoves your shirt up to your breasts and circles your bellybutton with the tip of his tongue—his enhanced strength easily pinning you down as you jerk and giggle.

Bucky picks up his head and grins. “Try and hold still, doll.”

No sharp retort comes to mind. Fuck—he’s already got you so expertly wrapped around his finger. 

Bucky hums, satisfied with your weak nod and continues on.  

Bucky’s bare fingers trace minuscule patterns into the sensitive skin of your inner thighs, coaxing out a shiver that rushes through your body. They tickle towards the apex of your thighs and settle close enough to reach your aching center. He pauses for a moment and while you know he’s there, you curse when you feel his thumbs softly part the lips of your soaking cunt. They gently work up and down, smearing your wetness around but never enough to give you any friction as your body adjusts to the feel of flash and vibranium. You bite back a groan as your hips unconsciously twitch. 

Unsatisfied with simply touching you, Bucky shifts his weight to better reach your core. “Fuck—you’re so pretty.”   

There's a moment just before Bucky swoops down, face hovering close enough that you can feel his sticky, warm breath fan across you inner thighs. Anticipation grips your heart with an iron hold, and then— Bucky licks a broad stripe from the base of your cunt all the way up to your swollen clit. His mouth is molten, tongue like liquid velvet as you shudder and grab at his hair. Bucky grunts against you as you drag him closer by the short strands—greedy for any and all touch he gifts you. Bucky’s mouth slips around your clit, sucking and tracing circles over the bundle of nerves with the tip of his tongue. Your eyes flutter shut as a quiet moan wrenches free from your vocal cords.  

He trails lower, sucks on your labia, and makes his way down to your soaking entrance. The wet heat of his tongue circles your cunt, skips over it completely to catch the wetness before it leaks over the couch. Bucky opens his mouth wide and groans in appreciation, devouring your pussy like he’s been denied this his entire life. Desperation lingers on his tongue and all you are is the honey sweet taste of salvation. 

“Shit—Bucky,” you cry, throwing your hips forward in search of more friction.

It's perfect. So fucking delicious. 

You tense as the vibranium tips of his fingers, two of them, press at your entrance, teasing the clenching ring of soft muscle before sinking in. The chilly digits slip in with ease—all the way up to the second knuckle and when he draws them back, they're slick with your wetness. With a self-satisfied grin, Bucky thrusts them back in, then out—setting a steady pace that makes everything ache with desire. It leaves you just hovering over the sharp edge of ecstasy, the catch of his knuckles and imperceptible metal plating dragging along your walls pure torture. Fuck—he’s going to be the death of you—

Bucky’s mouth dips down a second time and sucks on your clit and with a few more curls and thrusts of his fingers inside of your clenching walls, your body seizes up tight. You're flying off that edge, faster than a fucking freight train. You cum onto his tongue and fingers with a strangled cry of his name, sparks of blurry white lining the edges of your vision as your back arches. Bucky continues to lick you through your orgasm, even as you buck and squirm in his iron hold. Supernovas implode behind your eyelids as heat, hotter than wildfire and jet fuel spreads from your center all the way up your stomach and down to your toes. You're shaking, lucid enough to hear Bucky murmur his praise—feeling the vibration of his groan, as he licks up the flood of your wetness over his tongue. 

Your brain swims in hazy bliss as you float back to reality. He's still curling his fingers into your pussy and it damn near hurts. You're too sensitive. Nerves rubbed raw and still throbbing—but you're too fucked out and still riding the waves of your orgasm to push him away. Bucky is all too happy to remain between your legs—takes this opportunity to tilt his fingers into your cunt faster, suckle and lave his hot tongue over your clit that burns from overstimulation—somehow you're back at the very edge again.

It's sharper than a vibranium razor against bare flesh. Your thighs shake around him as he twists his fingers inside you and bumps agains that tiny, little patch of nerves. You cry out as an orgasm floods through you veins, rupturing each cell in your being with molten pleasure. Your core pulses around Bucky’s fingers, fucking you through it until those burning waves of release eventually cease to a fading throb. You whine and push at his forehead because he's still going. You panic a bit—fucking hell, he’s gonna make you cry—but he pulls away, his mouth and chin wet with your slick. 

“Feel good?” Bucky purrs, resting his cheek on your thigh. 

If judging by the way you thighs still quiver and your chest heaves—then yeah—it felt good. 

Cheeky bastard.  

“Get up here—“

You grapple with his shirt, fisting the thin fabric, but he’s heavy and your entire body feels like jello. Your grip strength is all but laughable at the moment as Bucky clambers back onto the couch and grabs both of your legs, slotting his narrow hips between them. One leg is stuck against the back of the couch while the other hangs off the edge, foot skimming the hardwood floor to accommodate Bucky. Not the most comfortable but fuck it—who cares.    

Bucky grunts when you lift your hands and hook your fingers into the waistband of his jeans, tugging them halfway down his legs with a sharp yank. Already a dark patch of wetness stains the fabric of his boxers, the impressive bulge straining against the elastic and begging to be released. Your eyes meet his icy blue ones as you slowly pull his boxers over his cock. It bounces up towards his navel, thick and beautiful just like the rest of him. 

Impatient, Bucky’s fingers curl around your wrist and presses your open palm against his cock. He’s thick and heavy in your hand—perfect. The bead of precum that pools at his flushed tip smears against the inside of your palm as you experimentally roll your wrist, fascinated with the feel of his foreskin rolling over the steel heard flesh with each stroke.You give his a cock a rougher squeeze, a bolt of liquid heat settling in the pit of your stomach as a stifled moan reaches your ears. 

A sharp hiss of hair passes through his clenched teeth as you lightly tug on his cock. From the base up you pull, fixed upon the throbbing flesh, flushed and pulsing and all for you. His cock bobs when you let go—he huffs out a disappointed noise. “I need you, Buck—please.” 

Your previous two orgasms did seemingly nothing to soothe the growing ache for him. It prickles up your spine and singes through every nerve and bone—you whine and arch your hips, trying to touch your slick cunt to his cock. Bucky growls your name and pins your hips to the couch with ease. 

With his left hand, Bucky firmly grips your jaw, his stare folding into something serious. “You sure?”

Your tongue runs over your bottom lip. You grin. “Do your worst.”

Bucky curses and readjusts your calf slung over his hip and grips the base of his cock. You shudder as he runs the blunt head through your folds, slicking himself up with your arousal. You mewl and dig your nails into the flesh of his forearm as the wide tip of him pushes into your entrance—he shudders as you clench and arch. It doesn’t hurt, but he’s certainly not small in any way shape or form. You’ll feel him for days afterwards as your cunt swallows inch after inch. 

You both groan as he finally bottoms out. His jaw clenched tight as sweat beads at his hairline. Shit—he’s gorgeous—struggling not to loose control the moment he’s buried inside of you. You allow yourself to adjust for a moment but your own impatience rakes down your spine with claws of scorching arousal. You rock your hips in curiosity and squeeze around him. 

“Fuck—“ A ragged moans severs his words as your gentle rocking tilts into abrasive jolts. At this angle it’s difficult to fuck yourself onto his cock, but the measly thrusts are meant to tempt him. His left hand shoots to your throat, the chilly metal a stark contrast to your flushed skin. You dip your head back, exposing more of your supple skin—all his for the taking. 

You dig the heel of your foot into the small of his back and grab at his shoulders—tempting him into fucking you already. You’ve waited long enough. Bucky snarls your name, hooks one hand under your ass and pulls his cock nearly all the way, out only to slam back in with devastating force. There’s no time to adjust or gather your obliterated thoughts before Bucky sets a pace, desperate and feral. Each roll of his hips borders erratic, taking his pleasure without thought—intent on reaching his own end after being denied for what seems like a millennia—and maybe it has been. Bucky shifts, widening his knees as much as he can to sink lower onto your body—his soft hair tickles your cheek as his choppy exhales burn hot over your skin. 

Bucky turns his head to steal a kiss, open mouthed and catastrophic. No words are exchanged as he fucks into you with brutal strength aided by that damn super-soldier serum—there’s no need for them, not now anyway. You complete each other without the spoken utterances—still both a work in progress. Though most things are you suppose—constantly remaking yourselves, but instead of smashing the haphazard pieces back together alone—you have one another. You bury your hand in his hair and cry his name.  

You choke out another groan and feel your arousal begin to drip down your thighs—hear the thrusts of his cock into your cunt become shamefully wetter and damn—you really hope nothing gets on this stupid couch. You don’t want to explain that Sam. 

Electric heat sears down each vertebrae in your spine, blazing through each and every vein with the brilliance of a wildfire escaping the edges of the forest. This is gonna ruin you. Bucky’s hand reaches between your bodies and rubs tight, controlled circles over you swollen clit. There’s no build up to your orgasm—just a calamitous surge of warmth that sweeps your very soul off its feet. Your nails dig into Bucky's back as you shake and fumble for a foothold in your own consciousness—the steady warmth of his body a much needed anchor. 

You have no time to recover because he’s still going. Thrusting into your pussy with violent slaps that echo through the room and will more than likely leave bruises against your ass. Through the pressure of his hand over your windpipe—threatening to cut your air off completely—you garble out his name. Bucky drops his head to his chin, the weight of his gaze landing between your legs, watching the way his entire length disappears inside of you. When he raises his head he molds his mouth to yours. The soft, wet kisses rapidly morph into pricks of his teeth, his gravelly moans so pleasing to hear. 

You arch and tilt your head back as he presses you harder into the couch. The vibranium hand latched onto your jaw, works it open and slides a thumb past your plush lips. You lave your tongue over the digit—the metallic tang flooding your tastebuds. “Good girl—m’close. A little longer.”

Bucky’s panting breaths mingle with yours as his pace turns vicious. Chasing his high that he so desperately needs. Overstimulation bites at your nerves, but with a gentle tug to the soft strands of hair on the back of his neck and a sweet whisper of his name, Bucky bursts. His moan jumps up an octave, eyes slamming shut as he buries his face into the juncture of your neck and shoulder as he cums. He’s shuddering in your arms as his hips erratically jerk, hot spurts of his release coating your insides. You whine and tilt your hips up to prevent it from spilling onto the couch. 

Finally he slows to a stop, ragged breathing filling the air as the heat and weight of his body becomes a welcome comfort. Eventually that warmth grows stifling. He lazily pulls away, observing gaze drinking in each inch of bare skin exposed—the marks and the light sheen of sweat. You hiss as he curiously drags his thumb over the bite mark lingering just above your collarbone.

He parts his plush lips but before he can apologize, you interject. “Don’t—I like the reminder.”

Bucky shakes his head and drops down to tempt your lips into a lazy dance. “You’re a weirdo.”

You smile and cup his cheek. “I’m not the one with a staring problem. You know that you can’t kill people by glaring, right?”

Bucky kisses your cheek, your jaw, and then the dip of your throat. “You don’t ever shut up, do you?” 

You shudder as his softening cock twitches inside of you, another coal of desire flaring in the pit of your stomach. You flash him a coquettish grin. “Maybe if you give my mouth something to do, you’ll finally get some peace and quiet.” 

Something dark and dangerous flickers within those eyes. You shiver as one hand returns to your throat while the other draws teasing patterns over the outside of your thigh. He draws in close, nips at the shell of your ear and chuckles darkly. “You’re on.”

[extremelyblackandwhite]

a year in the life | rockstar! s.s.

pairing: rockstar!sebastian stan x writer!reader

main work: i wanna know what love is

season: autumn 🍁

a/n: in celebration of 4 major works of mine turning one this year (my babies, cannot believe it’s been a year) and based on the reboot of gilmore girls, i will be revisiting my works per season. we are starting with autumn and rockstar!seb. hope you enjoy xx

Y/N laid on the big chez lounge couch in the middle of her living room, surrounded by her children’s toys, with a large bowl of Doritos on her lap as the Real Housewives played on the background. For the very first time since forever, she was alone at home; Jess and Marion were at their respective schools while Sebastian was busy in the studio, doing some rearrangements to a new album. She loved the three of them more than anything but she knew that she would’ve never had the chance to eat Doritos without Sebastian complaining it was unhealthy for her or her children trying to take a bite. Lately, all she wants is to lay low, bask in her leave from work and watch some trashy TV. 

As her eyes were getting heavier and heavier with sleep when the front door opened, sending her back into alert mood. Luckily, it wasn’t no one trying to break in but her husband who still couldn’t open doors without making a big ruckus about it. 

     - I’m sorry, bunny. -  he stepped back as he recognised his wife’s sleepy face. - I thought you’d be in the bedroom. 

     - Can’t move. - she pointed at her bulging bump covered by one of his old jumpers which seemed to be the only thing that fully covered her at this particular stage. Sebastian chuckled, walking over to her to quickly kiss her, hand caressing her bump through the jumper. - Didn’t expect you to be home so early.

      - I can see. - he pointed at the bowl of Doritos on her lap. - You’re supposed to be the prudent one. 

    - I’m carrying your offspring. It makes me make bad decisions. - she teased, cuddling against him as he sat by her side, worn out slightly loose black leather jacket still on. - How are the boys?

    - Fighting about who gets to be godfather this time.

    - Did you tell them my brother is gonna be the godfather?

    - Now, where would the fun be in that, bunny? - he smirked, with that boyish like looks he still managed to remain after all these years. 

    - Stop it. - she leaned towards him to kiss him. 

    - How are you feeling today? - his hand mindlessly rubbed her bump, feeling the little moves of the baby whenever the baby moved. - Little one is a bit feisty today.

    - It’s been like this all of last night. I think I might be closer to labour than we think.

    - Why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve driven the kids to school, honey love. 

    - You needed to sleep. - she groaned as she stretched her legs. - Besides, Marion is staying with your mum today so I wanted to spend some time with her before she went. 

    - No kids tonight? - he leaned over to kiss her collarbone. - How long has it been?

    - As long as I’ve been pregnant. - she pushed him away playfully. - Jess is not going. 

    - Why not? Jess loves my mum. Is he sick? Urgh, is the flu going around his class again? We need to put him into a better school, those kids at his school are always s...

    - Seb, stop. - she rolled her eyes, smiling at the same time at how he’d gone from let it be to constant rambling about his children’s wellbeing. - He just wants to be home tonight and he’s been a little sad lately. 

    - You’re sure he’s not sick? Because there’s this private school which tests kids for all those flu things.

    - He’s not sick. He’s just got ... a bit of a lovebug. He got like this when I was last pregnant with Marion. 

    - Well, at least he hasn’t decided that the baby is just not coming. - Sebastian referred to Marion. Their daughter had just decided there was no baby coming around, even after being offered her own bedroom with her own bathroom, just for herself. - I’ll go pick him up, make it a whole thing. Maybe even pass by Al’s ... get you that pasta you really like. 

    - You’re just trying to make me forget that you’re the reason we’re moving houses. 

   - Y/N, this house has always been too small.

   - That’s because you need a whole room for your guitars alone. 

She’d spend the best part of her initial married years trying to convince Sebastian to either get a storage unit to put all his guitars in or to just merge it with his office yet, he’d always come back with an excuse. “Honey love, they need to be displayed”, “Bunny I would just get distracted if they were in my office” he would tell her with his rockstar like charm which she thought was strong enough to resist, yet how can she say no when he immediately shifts from boyish smile to having her pressed against the wall of that very same room, pounding into her as if he was an up and coming rockstar and her his favourite groupie. With the need for that bedroom, their once spacious apartment they bought when she was pregnant with Jess was becoming too small. Normally Y/N would be okay with it but being 8 months pregnant during the fall where it constantly rains in New York, moving seemed like the last thing she’d like to do and just thinking about it made her tired already. After all, she could barely walk to the kitchen without feeling tired or taking a short break in the middle of the path. She thought that after two pregnancies, the third one would be a walk in the park. Turns out it’s more like a run in the park, except the park is on fire and she’s barefoot. 

   - Honey love, asking me to get rid of my guitars is like asking you to get rid of your five copies of Emma.

   - They’re in different languages. - she argued back.

   - They’re different models, besides, we can finally have a guest bedroom. You always wanted a guest bedroom.

   - Sure then maybe my grandfather will come visit more often. How about that? - Sebastian chuckled at her answer. - I’m not joking. You get me pregnant, you get to be annoyed by my grandfather. 

   - You’re acting like this is my fault when you were the one who wore fishnets with a leather skirt. I’m only human. 

   - Fine, 10% my fault, 90% you fault. That’s my final offer.

   - You sure? 

   - Yes. You see, you are a sex maniac who cannot be controlled. 

   - That’s not what you wrote about me. - he smirked. - You said I had more soul than just a sex pot. 

   - Do not quote my own words at me.

   -  You bought my old guitar.

   - Urgh ... - she rolled her eyes. Sebastian grinned, happy he’d won the debate. - Just go make the other mums jealous please.

   - Look at you, using me for my sex appeal only.

   - No. I just really enjoy being the powerful mum. 

   - Yeah? What’s that like?

   - Constant questions about if we do weird sex blood rituals. Then mysterious answers, so they all fear you and don’t force you to attend PTA meetings on date nights. 

   - I gotta say, bunny ... we got this parenting thing covered. 

   - We do.

   - When I come back, you better not have a bowl of Doritos on your belly.

   - I’ll do whatever I want.

   - Sure, bunny, if you walk to the kitchen by yourself ...

   - Low move, Stan. Low.

   - You love me. - he chuckled, grabbing his keys from the trinket dish by the entry door. - See you soon, bunny.

   - Love you. - she scrunched her face in a little smile which he couldn’t help but smile back.

Sebastian liked to pick up Marion and Jess from school. His schedule normally meant Y/N, who had a more 9-5 job, was the one who’d do the drop offs and collections so he’d always meet them at home but whenever he could pick them up, he’d be the first one there. He just loved to see his two babies come out of school in their little uniforms which he incredibly hated when they first enrolled but now couldn’t help but find incredibly adorable. He also loved to see how both his children came out of school. Marion would be the one who’d take the longest, surrounded by all her friends and probably nursing a scrape or two on her knee as if kindergarten 2-3 year old was a big fighting ground while Jess would come out as quickly as he could. 

He parked slightly in front of his son’s school, coming out of the car and leaning against it. The parents’ eyes were immediately on him, maybe it was due to the star power or, most likely, it was because he was wearing a leather jacket, dark shades and his neck tattoo could be seen peaking out the collar of his jacket. His shoes crinkled the fallen leaves on the floor, avoiding those looks as he waited for his son. He knew who he was and he was not going to change it because he became a father, he is a good father, he knows that. The bell rang and a swarm of children came rushing out of the school, and they say birth rates are low. He took his sunglasses off, trying to pin point his son in the middle of all different aged children. 

   -  DAD! - he turned his head to the memorable voice, crutching down as he son rushed to him. Jess wrapped his arms around his father, little childish giggles as Sebastian pulled him off the floor.

   - Hey, buddy. How was school?

   - We did hand turkeys.

   - Hand turkeys? No way, that’s so cool. - he opened up the car’s passenger’s seat, sticking around to check if he fastened his seatbelt correctly before taking the driver’s seat. - It’s just gonna be us three today, bud. You, me and mummy. We getting Al’s and some ice cream. 

   - Why didn’t mummy come?

   - Mummy is very tired, buddy. The baby is kicking a lot, won’t let the baby sleep.

   - Oh ...  - Sebastian saw his son’s face grow sadder.

   - What do you want from Al’s, bud? You can get whatever you want.

   - Really?

   - Yeah.

The little restaurant had soon become a staple in their family life. Sebastian had. discovered by accident after accidentally burning dinner for Y/N’s. He wasn’t already too popular with Y/N’s family so he knew he had to fix it and there it was, the small little restaurant filled with delicious food. Now, it was just a Friday night tradition yet today was special, almost nostalgic to when Y/N, Sebastian and Jess had their first home. Back when Y/N and him were new parents and would trip on every toy in the apartment. God, those were the days. 

  - Dad? - Jess pulled at his sleeve while the two were waiting in the queue. 

  - Yeah, bud? - Sebastian picked him up, already understanding the signs of whenever he wanted to be held. 

  - I ... The baby’s not coming for a while, right? 

  - Why, Jessie? What did Marion say?

  - She didn’t say anything ... uhm, it’s gonna be three of us now. 

  - Yeah. We’re gonna get a new big place, we can even get a dog or a cat. You always wanted a cat, didn’t you? 

  - But, now I’m third.

  - What do you mean? - Sebastian furrowed his brows at the comment.

  - Well, when Marion was a baby you and mummy were always with her but she’s still a baby and now there’s a new baby, so I’m gonna be third. - Sebastian’s heart broke at that comment. Now it made sense. - And ... you’re not home a lot and mummy is gonna be busy with the baby.

  - Hey, you’re not third. - he rubbed his son’s back, kissing the side of his head, soothing him to the best of his ability. - You want me to be home more?

  - No, daddy ... you like doing music. 

  - Hm ... how about you come to the studio with me when you don’t have school?

  - Really? But you said I’m too little. 

  - Well, you’re gonna be a big brother again, I think it’s time.

  - Really?

  - Yeah. - he smiled him, his smile reflecting back at him. 

  - Faye. 

  - What?

  - We should name the baby Faye. 

  - Faye? You want your baby sister to be named Faye?

  - Yes.

  - Well ... Faye it is.

[arthurjdrake]

For Keeps : Alain & Arthur

Summary: A phoenix and a hunter go into a bar. (aka Amelie and I somehow never posted a doc we wrote like 3 months ago don’t judge us) >_> Parties: Arthur and @carbrakes-and-stakes

Recent events had come to show that sometimes meeting new people (Leah especially) didn’t always go terribly, and the little he’d experienced of Alain so far from their online conversations gave Arthur a strangely positive vibe. He couldn’t say what it was, but shared interests were certainly a scene setter for an interesting afternoon over beer if nothing else. Though it transpired with recent revelations that his interest in Alain was further vested in gauging just what sort of person he was and just what Evelyn saw in him that made her interested in being with him. Call it protective curiosity. The Perfect Pint was a decent enough establishment and one he frequented if only for the full plate of good food and Guinness they had on tap. A sizeable establishment with light filtering through slightly grimy windows, it smelled like an ashtray but was relatively clean by most pubs standards. Not to mention the presence of several dart boards and snooker tables for patrons to use if they so pleased. Wooden stools lined up against the bar resembled careless soldiers. Two were occupied and Arthur was five minutes early. So he leaned on the darkwood bar, occasionally sipping a cool pint of Guinness while watching the highlights scrolling on the screen and wincing at a particularly nasty tackle.

Alain pushed the door to The Perfect Pint expecting to have a peaceful moment for once. No hunting, no arguing, not questioning everything. Just chatting with someone with common interests and seeing where that led. Not going to the Silver Bullet for once would also be a nice change. It must have been months since he last went to a normal bar. Being greeted by the sound of football matches and people playing pool was a nice change, and it reminded Alain of the few weeks he had spent in Europe a couple years ago. Now he did not care much for the smell of cigarettes, but if this was all he could complain about, then he would not complain at all. Recognizing some customers as he made his way to the counter, he nodded politely and took a seat with the man he figured would be Arthur. If not, then things would probably get awkward really quick. “Bonjour,” he greeted him, figuring that would be enough of a tell. The bartender approaching, he ordered himself a pint of Amber Ale and turned his attention back to Arthur. “I hope I’m not late.”

There weren’t too many people in town Arthur felt he could go down to the pub to simply have a drink with, he was woefully short on friends who weren’t so studiously academic that it was kind of funny to imagine them in a setting like this. Plus, it reminded him of home in an inexplicable way. From the smell to the darkwood features of the pub, like his local back in Twickenham. Occasionally he glanced at his wrist-watch checking and rechecking the time, the smooth carved wood of its casing a familiar comfort in its proximity. As a figure approached and sat down beside him he turned, body-language relaxed and comfortable, an amicable smile warming his features upon hearing the French. “Salut,” he greeted with a small dip of his head, taking a moment to just study Alain, taking in the years around his eyes and features, the stubborn lingering grease around his fingernails and a missing finger as well. Interesting. Arthur vaguely remembered him saying he was a mechanic in a past conversation. A bit rough around the edges but he could see the appeal though it was the personality he was more intrigued to learn more about. “Not at all,” he laughed quietly at the sentiment with a shake of his head “no, I’m just partial to being early.” He let Alain order before he leaned back a little, “so you own the garage in town right? How’s business been going for you lately?”

If Alain could feel like he was being scrutinized, he didn’t mention it to Arthur, and instead, pretended to look just about anywhere else. He had never been here, so this gave him a good enough excuse not to be attentive. “Is it really how pubs look in the UK?” The place looked like a postcard, and a whole lot like pubs that claimed to be authentic, and he couldn’t quite decide if it was really close to the actual thing or a caricature. Clearly, the mime places weren’t as authentic as they claimed to be, so maybe this was the case here as well. He rubbed at the corner of his eye with one finger and thanked the bartender as he came back with his drink. “Do you actually speak French or…” either way, there would be no hard feelings, but once again, he was curious, which was a good indicator : a bored Alain did not ask questions and hardly spoke. Taking a sip from his pint, he leaned back a little in the seat and nodded in reply to Arthur’s question. “Business is doing alright. I’ve had a few good months with the falling fish. Lots of shattered windshields, lots of intensive cleaning too,” scratching the back of his neck, he shrugged. With the big lobsters, a bunch of cars had been roughly damaged, and considering he had to spend some time off work, all those events had helped keeping the cash coming. “What about you. You’re a teacher, right?”

“It’s not a bad imitation of one considering they even have an old geezer eating roasted peanuts” Arthur admitted eyeing another patron at one of the tables in the corner. “Plus this is the only place I can actually catch games when they’re on, even if it is at like one AM… Granted it’s worth staying up if only for the Irish breakfast.” The question was met with a nod, “I speak a little to pass conversation. I’m kinda rusty and the amount of exceptions to all the tenses always catches me in one place or another…” He shrugged a shoulder taking a sip of his beer “personally, I think it’s important especially if you’re going to live somewhere for a while you know? Too many people just expect everyone else to cater to them just because they’re too lazy and entitled to learn another language.” That was a trait that bothered him about most people growing up in an anglophone environment, the lack of desire to even try and relate to people from other walks of life; forcing them to adapt from their culture. It was hardly fair in his mind. “Ha, yeah I can imagine there’s all sorts of interesting things that keep you busy. The newspaper mentioned something about screaming moose you know? I never thought I’d live anywhere that the wildlife would be much of an issue.” Or maybe he should’ve considered that before moving to White Crest. “Yeah! I teach up at the university, history and mythology department. Certainly no lack of folklore around these parts.”

“What?” Alain followed Arthur’s eyes and his shoulders shook with amusement at the sight of the old geezer eating roasted peanuts. “Alright, that is authentic for sure,” he had another sip of beer. Listening to the man talk, his brows furrowed. “You’re kidding? This is like music to my insomniac ears,” of course insomnia was a stretch, but Alain was not about to tell Arthur that he was a vampire hunter, and that as a result, he really didn’t need to sleep that much. Insomniac seemed a lot more simple. “Night entertainment and food, I’m sold,” he scoffed. Now was he surprised to hear that Arthur struggled with the french language? Not really. “Hey, if you ever need practice, you know where to find me,” he offered. It did not cost him much, and he liked chatting in his native language. Really a win win. “I agree. I mean, obviously if you’re only here for a week, there’s only so much you can do, but don’t expect everyone to speak your own language, that’s… logical,” he shrugged, refraining from rolling his eyes. “You just have to be … logical,” he repeated. Clearly things were easier for him when he visited France, but his time in Spain had been quite something, as he could only remember very few things in Spanish. “Screaming moose?” His eyebrows raised and he glanced to the side, clearly concerned. Could it be due to supernatural reasons? Possible. He’d have to ask Kaden about that one. “Clearly not. The area is quite … rich in folklore. I think we’re a good tie with Louisiana and Salem,” he agreed. “What is your favorite folklore story?”

“See?” Arthur chuckled eyes crinkling at the corners in his mirth at the token sight that seemed a staple in most pubs back home, there was always at least one. “No way! I kid about a lot of things but not that. Definitely not when it comes to a full Irish and watching rugby or football. For sure, next time there’s something on I’ll let you know, even if it does mean I have to sit and watch France play--” he lamented with a put-upon look though it was all in jest. Insomnia was interesting but hardly surprising in a town such as this; there could be any host of reasons behind it. “I might take you up on that, I find it hard not to be so formal in structuring the sentences...” Arthur tilted his glass a little “well, yeah sure but I still think if you’re going to visit another country it’s at least polite to try. It’s just always been a pet peeve, just people being so self-involved they don’t think about trying to make an effort for anyone else.” Alain seemed surprised and Arthur’s brows furrowed, “didn’t you see the newspaper? It was a while back but something about Sunday at sundown being when moose would scream? Seemed a bit weird… I didn’t know moose could scream… Just thought they trampled things.” But hey, wild life could surprise you especially in a town like this.

“Rich is an understatement,” he said with a shake of his head. “Issue is most of the stories around these parts were passed down by word of mouth… Not many actual documents to look at.” There was a spark that always seemed to light up his features whenever he got into a discussion about folklore, “oh, would totally have to be the Huldufólk - the hidden folk - Icelanders believe they’re hidden elves that live in the shadows between rocks, it’s said they love to dance and invade farms at Christmas to hold wild parties. That their origins come from the Garden of Eden, when God visited Adam and Eve, Eve was washing their children and hadn’t finished… Embarrassed, she hid the unwashed children and lied about their existence. To punish her God declared that the children she hid would be hidden from all of mankind and so the first Huldufólk came to be.” It was an interesting and unique narrative and one that had always intrigued him. “How about you? Do you take any interest in folklore?”

Pursing his lips, Alain remained silent as he turned to look at the other man, looking as offended as he looked amused by his comment on French teams. “Let’s not mention that England has not won a world cup in football since the 60s, despite being such a great nation of football, then, shall we?” clearing his throat, he took a sip of beer to hide his smile. Such an argument could go on for days, for sure, but it seemed like Arthur was not the kind to start pointless arguments. “There’s nothing wrong with that. I will admit to being less formal than I used to be,” it had been a while since he left the Babineaux household, and his speech level had grown simpler with time. “Of course. Portugal was awkward, I didn’t speak a damn word of portuguese and had to rely on one of those tiny vocabulary books,” he mimed the rough size of said book with his hands and raised his eyebrows in despair as he remembered how thankful he was that most people knew more English than he knew Portugese. “Yeah, some people do have a hard time not focusing on themselves,” scratching at the back of his neck, Alain looked thoughtful for a moment, staring into the gap. “They kind of sound like nazguls when they scream,” he finally commented, but it usually happened a bit later in the year. Alain had not exactly planned to discuss rut season, but if this was where the conversation was heading, why not?

“Like most stories. And it’s not like books or history is any better. It’s always written by those who survive, or those who won,” biased, but at least the version couldn’t change once printed on paper. You could tell how enthusiastic Arthur was about the subject, and it was refreshing. Leaning against his elbow, the hunter listened to the scholar talk about some ancient legend. The story sounded a bit too polished to be the truth, but he did not doubt that Iceland had a bunch of little folks living in the shadow. “It’s hard not to when you spend your whole life in this town. I’m afraid I don’t have stories to tell however,” clearly this was a lie, but Alain knew better than to start telling people he barely knew about his night time activities.

“True,” though Arthur raised a brow in mild challenge, “but what we do have are three six nations titles to the name in the last ten years. So I think that counts for something. You can take football, I’ll take rugby. Issue settled.” It was banterous and Arthur’s grin was cheeky in spite of himself. “You tend to get that way with time, formalities are nice but they can be so constricting to adhere to all the time.” He snorted a little at the comparison, “oh Gods don’t ruin Nazguls for me like that. No no that’s not allowed.” Lord of the Rings was sacred in this sphere and nothing, especially no moose screaming was allowed to ruin it.

“I mean that’s true of almost anything in life. It’s just nice to actually have some hard evidence to work from rather than just the word of mouth. At least that way you can start to deduce what influences there might’ve been on a source.” Perhaps the story was too polished, too easily wrapped up but it was a nice tale nonetheless. Not everything in the world had to be all doom and gloom. So what if there were elves that liked to play games and pull tricks. “Huh, really? Did you grow up here?”

“Heh, fine,” then coughing to jokingly hide what he was about to say, he added in a hurry, “Football’s better anyway.” Obviously coughing was not meant to really hide anything, and he found himself laughing. Shaking his head, he ran a hand in his hair and sighed heavily. “Formalities are fine by me, although I wouldn’t hope to see me ‘formal’,” he scratched at the corner of his mouth, shook his head and took a sip of beer again. Once again he found himself laughing at the man’s reaction. Alain really would have to stop insulting everything Arthur liked. “Nazguls ruined themselves on their own. Moose have the right to ruin them more,” it appeared they had yet another thing in common. Although he was never an hardcore fan, he still remembered the first time he read the Hobbit very fondly.

“Fair enough. I just feel like history is really biased and often misinterpreted too,” you just had to look at what people were taught at school. Maps placing their country in the middle of the world, wars lost barely mentioned… “I did grow up here. But no, no stories,” not any he wanted to tell. “I can however bore you to death about astronomy. Or myths related to constellations, although you probably already know them all.”

It wasn’t the worst, Arthur rather enjoyed a challenge and the fact Alain seemed willing to challenge ideas in a joking fashion was a good sign for the man’s own personality. “Noo!” he protested with a laugh waving his hand as if to try and stop the insults light-hearted as they were “that’s not allowed, only the waters of Bruinen are allowed to completely wreck the Nazguls or a hobbit with a frying pan. Sheesh these are the sorts of debates I used to get into with Evelyn. The real issues of life.” It wasn’t entirely true, this was one facet of many that he and Evelyn had discussed but Arthur was curious to see how Alain would react to hearing her name.

“It often is, but I think that’s part of the challenge of studying it. Knowing you have to work to try and uncover the obfuscated truth behind the fogs of what people want you to believe.” It was countless, the amount of times he’d tried to submit revisions based on contrary evidence, some had gone through while others… It was a tiring endeavor but one he’d continue to pursue regardless. “That would hardly bore me. I’ve been fascinated with astronomy since I was a child. There’s actually very little I find more interesting.”

“I don’t know,” Alain’s brows furrowed at the mention of hobbit held frying pans, and they furrowed some more at the mention of Evelyn. You could see the cogs turning and trying to figure out what this was about. Biting his lip, he shook his head. “You wouldn’t happen to be…” he tried to remember the words she used. “I think she might have mentioned that she had a favorite professor in town,” he scoffed, shaking his head. He supposed that it made sense that she would mention him to her mentor, as secretive as she could be, it was hard not to share some things.

If Alain had often had to do research, it was far from the academic kind, but that did not mean that he couldn’t dedicate entire days to gathering information on certain kinds of undead species. The hardest part was not knowing the species name and hoping to recognize characteristics in his readings. “That’s what I like with cars, they don’t usually tell lies, which makes my job a lot easier,” he doubted that cars would be something Arthur could be interested in, but he was not too surprised to hear that he liked astronomy too, but that did not mean he wouldn’t be excited about it. “Really?!” His tone of voice was unusually cheerful. “Then you have to join me for stargazing sometimes.”

It would be interesting to see what Alain came up with, and while he clearly processed the passing mention Arthur took a sip of his Guinness giving him time to think but out of the corner of his eye watching curiously. “Oh did she?” it was easy enough to feign mild surprise with just a dash of curiosity thrown in for good measure. He made a quietly amused sound, “yes, she does like to remind me of that as often as she can - along with the fact she was one of my brightest students… She’s hardly a forgettable person but if you know her I’m sure you’re aware of that fact.”

“Well, no lies if they’re built well. I once had a guy try to sell me a knockoff Bentley - full look of the thing but the insides were scavenged from hell. Luckily I didn’t agree to that deal.” While Arthur didn’t know much about cars, he knew which ones he liked and back in the day he’d raced the odd car here and there. So it was more a casual interest than a passionate hobby. The enlightened state that seemed to come over Alain’s features on the topic of Astrology - much in the same way his own lit up at the mention of mythology was interesting and Arthur could tell that whatever else, Alain was certainly someone he liked. “Stargazing? Sure, I’ve actually got a great telescope back at mine. Always try to do some Astrophotography when I’ve been out on fieldtrips… Nothing better than a long hike and taking some good photos. I’ll have to show you sometime.”

Alright, so maybe it was not completely a coincidence that he and Arthur had ended up talking to each other, although Alain hoped that they really shared the same interests. “She does leave a strong impression, a good impression,” he clarified. Even knowing that she was not really human, he couldn’t seem to be able to change the way he felt about her, and he was terrified by it, even though he liked to tell himself that if she had fed on him this whole time, he would change his mind about the woman he had feelings for. “I’m grateful we met.”

“The lies here come from that guy, people lie, not cars. If you ever want to acquire one of these, please do tell. I like restoring properly older cars. “The Continental Bentley from the 1950s is a real beauty, but hard to find in good shape these days,” the man’s enthusiasm didn’t waver as the subject changed to astronomy. Quite the contrary. “See, that’s something I struggle with. I never seem to be able to take a proper picture. I tried, but I think I’m just really not good with that kind of technology,” he liked taking pictures, and Evelyn liked having her picture taken which was a great combination, but when it came to space, it was almost disastrous. “You really need to show me. I could use that.”

“That’s true,” Arthur agreed, seeming to take measure of the answer and find it satisfactory “she’s quite a remarkable young woman.” Evelyn had been right, and from what Arthur could tell, Alain was being genuine. “How did you meet? If you don’t mind me asking?” Evelyn had been rather cryptic of late regarding Alain and Arthur was rather curious to learn the story there. “She’s a good friend of mine so I find myself interested in the people she surrounds herself with.”

While Arthur was still taking note of Alain’s general disposition, he seemed to relax into the new conversation put at ease by what he could read from the other man’s reaction regarding Evelyn. “It’s funny you mention that, I’ve got the Bentley Continental V8 here at the minute but back home I have a 1949 Bentley VI Saloon and a 1962 Chevrolet Corvette. They’re some of the best drives I think I’ve ever had on the road.” An understanding nod was given, “ah yeah, often you just have to spend a while playing around with the exposure on the camera and make sure you use a tripod to keep it stable. It’s a bugger but once you get the hang of it it’s not too bad.” He grinned clearly excited by the proposed idea “but sure, next time there’s something astrological going on, send me a message and I’ll give you a crash course. Maybe you can give me a crash course in cars.”

Young woman. He had to wonder if this was meant to be an attack or not. As far as he was concerned, yes, she was young, and yes, he was older, and it was uncommon, but it was something he and Evelyn had discussed. In the end, it was Alain who felt the least comfortable about the difference, not her. “Oh, ahem,” he mused. “Well, I was trespassing on her property, which is a great first impression apparently. I wanted to find a good spot to stargaze, but didn't know it was a private beach,” he trailed off. Yeah, that had been embarrassing, and he had considered fleeing the place the moment Evelyn disappeared to get a cardigan.

Now he was glad he did not.

“Oh.” Well he really was not a fan of the newer ones, as he found them a bit too soft looking, but he kept that to himself. And so it surprised him that Arthur seemed to like some very different cars, but he would not question the man’s taste. To each their own. “See Evelyn, she owns too many cars,” he scoffed. An understatement, although it was not really a surprise. She liked owning things, especially pretty things, and Alain wondered sometimes if there was a reason for that need. “Sure, that sounds lovely. Let’s just hope that my crash course involves no crashing cars,” shaking his head, he took another sip of beer. “I just think that people, just, everyone should know more about what’s under the hood.”

It was less an attack, more a statement of fact and Arthur’s view of evelyn. She was an incredible young woman. There was no further intention to the words than that and if he did notice any discomfort it wasn’t remarked on. He’d learned one lesson lately and that was to let some things lie. So instead, he listened to Alain’s story, leaning a little more on the bar with his interest fixed because he was genuinely curious to learn the tale and get a better understanding of his friend’s mind in this. “And did she stay out?” Arthur assumed so but better to get clarification just to be on the safe side.

“But I do have the other two older ones, I might get them shipped over at some point… I just didn’t know how permanent my residence here was going to be and I didn’t want to ship them and find myself heading back overseas you know? Too much hassle.” Though he had to laugh at the statement of Evelyn and cars, “she has too much stuff period. Always has, but I can hardly blame her for that.” Arthur had his own reasonings about why that might be the case but it wasn’t something to discuss right now. Alain was nice enough but not someone he’d chat in depth to about his long-time friends. Not yet at least. “Yeah, I’d rather not go out in a ball of flames.” The irony of that statement wasn’t lost on him. “You’re probably right, I guess it seems so foreign and alien to most people that even approaching the topic seems like a challenge. It’s kind of the same with history… or language. Some people nowadays are afraid of not being able to overcome the challenge I think.”

“She did,” he wrinkled his nose, “considering the reputation of Harris Island folks, I did consider for a moment that she was staying with me until the police arrived,” which was something that made him feel terrible, but could you really blame him. “I think she had nothing better to do,” Alain might have never been the luckiest person there was, but he always wondered what he could have possibly done to deserve her.

“I mean, that’s fair.” Alain rarely had to get cars imported, but he remembered having to import his own car from France, and how much of a hassle this had been. “I’d love to have a look at those, if you ever do get them shipped here,” he added, finishing his pint and searching for his wallet to pay the bartender. “Glad to know that she always has been this way,” he had a light laugh. Alain had given up on thinking of things he could offer her, hoping that memories could be things she would cherish more. “Let’s avoid that, yeah,” he shook his head. “People probably think it’s too complicated, too hard, too … I don’t know… That only some people are allowed to have this kind of knowledge,” the man had always been curious, and it was no surprise to learn that Arthur, an academic, felt the same way about learning new things.

“Understandable,” Arthur had met a few people that lived out that way and hadn’t been too impressed with them “Harris island folks can be pretty funny about strangers wandering onto their properties. Luckily she’s one of the better few out that way.”

“Sure, I’ll let you know if I ever make the decision to do that… Though considering how much glass damage it seems people complain about online I’m not sure if it’s something I’d really want to expose myself to… But I guess knowing a mechanic doesn’t hurt with that issue.” Setting his glass on the counter he pushed back a little. “Maybe, I guess some people just feel its unreachable for them in particular or they have no effort in pursuing the avenue to acquiring it.” Arthur waved his hand as he saw Alain reach for his wallet, fishing his card out the back of his phone case before good-naturedly adding “don’t worry about it, I’ll get them.”

“I suppose that’s what happens when you get a bit too out of touch with reality,” Alain was certain that his sister, or his parents, were the kind to react poorly to trespassers, and the reason he knew that was because he was himself not really fond of trespassers, and this, despite having spent the last two decades in the middle class.

“I don’t think soundproofing your garage is the answer to big noises, but hey, you now know a mechanic. I’m sure you’ll be alright,” the corners of his mouth tugged up, as he stood up from the stool. “Let me know if you ever feel like learning a thing or two, alright?” He frowned slightly at Arthur’s offer, but didn’t question it for too long and instead nodding, thankful. “Alright, thanks.”

With a huff of amusement Arthur grinned, “good thing people who are rational like us exist then.” With the delivery of a few notes across the bar and a tip for the waiter Arthur pushed to his feet and tucked his wallet away. “Well, nice to meet you Alain. And if you ever fancy watching ridiculously late night rugby matches just let me know.” With a wave of his hand he made his way towards the door and the walk back home in the early afternoon light.

[easyfoodnetwork]

The Ultimate Guide to Instant Noodles

A variety of instant noodles from different countries

How to mash-up, deconstruct, and altogether upgrade the versatile staple of dorm room dining

As a semi-professional noodle slurper and collector, I’ve eaten hundreds of noodles in my life, but I have a particular soft spot for one type, specifically: the instant kind. You know, those hard squiggly bricks of dried, fried noodles with accompanying seasoning packets that have long been the foundation of the American collegiate diet. Since the pandemic started, I’ve been showing off my impressive collection of instant noodles to my friends on FaceTime like a YouTube beauty guru flaunting their makeup stash.

I love instant noodles for many reasons: They have a nearly indefinite shelf life; they are an easy breakfast, snack, or — with the right bolstering — a full meal; and, they come in a panoply of shapes, textures, flavors, and colorful packaging styles. But while there is nothing wrong with eating instant noodles according to the instructions, it’s their versatility that’s made me a devoted fan. Here’s how to mash-up, deconstruct, and upgrade the dorm room staple.

1. Load up on protein

Yes, many instant noodles come with their own packets of dehydrated vegetable or meat flavoring, but they rarely provide much real taste and add zero in the way of texture. Supplementing your own additional proteins will do a lot to make your instant noodles more satisfying and nutrition-rich. Try simple items like ground meat, sausage, tofu, and leftover fried chicken — or my personal favorite ramen topping, pork char siu. Meat shortage got ya down? Just crack an egg. You can stir it right in to create an egg-drop soup effect, or poach the egg gently in the soup broth to enjoy breaking the creamy yolk.

Chicken-flavored ramen with garlicky sautéed kale, roasted chicken legs, and carrots.

2. Go big with toppings

Going nuts with the add-ons at ramen restaurants can mean spending $30 on a bowl of noodles (toppings normally cost between $1 and $3 each.) But at home, you can have as many toppings as the inventory of your fridge’s produce drawer allows: scallions, corn, mushrooms, kale, you name it. Not sure about what to do with all those weird greens in your CSA farm box? Add them to your instant noodles! Fact: There is no such thing as a lousy topping for instant noodles.

3. Deconstruct everything

Each element of the instant noodle package is a multi-purpose cooking superstar. The seasoning packets add a pop to stir-fried vegetables. Broken into bits, the uncooked noodles are an excellent crunchy topping for a salad or even another non-instant pasta dish. Do yourself a favor and add some ramen seasoning to mac and cheese, or how about using those instant noodles to make buns for an at-home ramen burger?

4. Switch up the liquid

To deepen the character of the soup, try cooking the noodles in vegetable or chicken broth instead of plain water. There are plenty of wilder recipes out there, including this one I’m skeptical of that uses milk, but homemade stock is a safe jumping off point.

5. Mash-up different styles

Mixing different instant noodle styles and seasoning packets is a culinary art form in itself, and can have big payoff. Jjapaguri (also called ram-don), the famous dish from the Oscar-winning movie Parasite, is actually just a hybrid of two different kinds of instant noodles — Neoguri and Jjappaghetti — and has become one of Korea’s national dishes. The magic comes from the mixing of Neguri’s spicy seafood powder with Jjappaghetti’s savory black bean powder, which ignites a lethal umami bomb. But jjapaguri is just the start. Try mixing Neoguri and curry noodles to create an exuberant, spicy curry broth. Combining super spicy noodles with something cheesy is also 100 percent never a bad idea.

Jjapaghetti goes well with fried egg

The Ones to Know

Here, then, are some of the best instant noodles to stock up on, categorized by whether or not they’re “brothy” (the noodle soup kind) or “saucy” (brothless noodles with a separate sauce).

BROTHY

MyKuali Penang White Curry Noodle If you love Penang curry, try adding this noodle to your cart. These wildly popular Malaysian instant noodles are considered some of the best in the world on this heavily opinionated ranking. Three whole flavor pouches — one of them is a paste — make for a deep, coconut-y taste and hearty portion size that you rarely get from instant noodles. Add toppings like fried tofu or prawns.

Neoguri, Spicy Seafood Udon Noodles Neoguri, a Korean word for raccoon dog (neither a raccoon nor a dog; discuss), has been my top choice for ramen since I started slurping noodles at the age of three. This beloved Korean instant noodle is known for two things: thick udon-like noodles and a spicy seafood broth with actual dried seafood. It’s fantastic with any fishy topping or add-ins.

Nongshim Shin Ramyun Noodle Soup Shin Ramyun might be the very first Korean instant noodle brand, as well as one of the easiest to find internationally: I still remember the exciting moment when I found Shin Ramyun in a random gas station in Alabama. It’s known for its spicy broth, and doubles as an excellent noodle for Korean ramen beginners. Top this with a slice of American cheese to tone down the spice and pump up the greatness.

Prima Taste Laksa Coconut Curry Lamian Noodles This Singaporean instant noodle inspired by traditional laksa has a paste sachet that can and should be used for stir-frying vegetables, too. The noodles are rounder and less wavy than others, and the white powder adds the signature creaminess.

Mama Noodles Thai cooking doesn’t shy away from acid, and neither do these Thai instant noodles, with just the right balance of acidic and salty flavors. The wavy noodles and the powdery seasonings make a great snack — though it may not be hearty enough to be a standalone meal. Beef it up with a hard-boiled egg and other vegetable toppings, like scallions.

Sapporo Ichiban Tokyo Chicken Momosan Ramen Think Japanese shoyu ramen, in instant form: salty, slightly smokey, and clean tasting. It’s great with plain old white-meat chicken breast — which is hard to say about anything, really.

Paldo Gomtang Oriental Style Noodles with Beef Soup Base Not all Korean instant noodles are spicy! This mild, creamy Korean noodle soup is inspired by gomtang, or beef bone broth. It has an intense beefiness and is excellent with hearty greens like cabbage or scallions. Add some ground beef to make it more filling.

Tseng noodles with black sesame sauce

SAUCY

Nongshim, Jjapaghetti (Noodle Pasta with jjajang Sauce) “On Sundays, I’m the chef for Jjapaghetti” has been a Korean catchphrase for more than a decade. A combination of two dishes — jajangmyun (black bean noodles) and spaghetti— this saucy Korean instant noodle is also what spurred the ram-don trend after its crucial role in Parasite. The accompanying savory black bean sauce is all it really needs, though I highly recommend a luxe drizzle of truffle oil, too.

Indomie Mi Goreng Instant Stir Fry Noodles If you haven’t tried this Indonesian instant noodle, stop what you’re doing and fix that immediately. The package comes with a liquid seasoning mix of savory onion-flavored oil, sweet-spicy chili sauce, and sweet soy sauce, creating a salty-and-sweet coating for the wavy noodles. Any optional toppings like grilled steak or boiled eggs are just gravy.

Samyang Extra Hot Chicken Flavor Ramen Are you up for #FireNoodleChallenge? Join the leagues of people who’ve filmed themselves slurping these dangerously spicy noodles. There are multiple flavor options available, from carbonara to curry, and all of them equally fiery. Cover this with lots of mozzarella cheese to tone down the heat to the point where you might actually enjoy it.

Tseng Noodles Scallion With Sichuan Pepper Flavor This Taiwanese instant noodle is all about texture. Its curling, knife-cut-like strands are a perfect match for the sauce. There are many different flavors, besides this scallion one, such as black sesame and shallots. Depending on the sauce, the noodles textures vary. Think of this as gourmet-tier, since it costs slightly more than other noodles, but it’s totally worth the splurge.

Paldo Bibim Myun Cold Noodle The spicy, tangy, sweet sauce of these Korean noodles will wake up even the dullest of palates. Cook the noodles until they’re just al dente, or still a little firm, then rinse them under cold water to get rid of any residual starch and achieve peak bounce and chew. The sauce packet is an excellent salad dressing, too. Add some chopped cucumber and hard-boiled egg for a clutch midnight snack, or add some ice cubes for a cooling summer treat.

Mom’s Dry Noodle Sichuan Spicy The Taiwanese knife cut-style noodles cling to the oily, spicy sauce for maximum slurpability. Top with a fried egg or fried cubed tofu and you can almost pretend you’re at a restaurant.

Mom’s Dry Noodle has dried ribbon noodles which have ideal textures for the sauce

from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2NkSTkS https://ift.tt/2V7Dj0p

A variety of instant noodles from different countries

How to mash-up, deconstruct, and altogether upgrade the versatile staple of dorm room dining

As a semi-professional noodle slurper and collector, I’ve eaten hundreds of noodles in my life, but I have a particular soft spot for one type, specifically: the instant kind. You know, those hard squiggly bricks of dried, fried noodles with accompanying seasoning packets that have long been the foundation of the American collegiate diet. Since the pandemic started, I’ve been showing off my impressive collection of instant noodles to my friends on FaceTime like a YouTube beauty guru flaunting their makeup stash.

I love instant noodles for many reasons: They have a nearly indefinite shelf life; they are an easy breakfast, snack, or — with the right bolstering — a full meal; and, they come in a panoply of shapes, textures, flavors, and colorful packaging styles. But while there is nothing wrong with eating instant noodles according to the instructions, it’s their versatility that’s made me a devoted fan. Here’s how to mash-up, deconstruct, and upgrade the dorm room staple.

1. Load up on protein

Yes, many instant noodles come with their own packets of dehydrated vegetable or meat flavoring, but they rarely provide much real taste and add zero in the way of texture. Supplementing your own additional proteins will do a lot to make your instant noodles more satisfying and nutrition-rich. Try simple items like ground meat, sausage, tofu, and leftover fried chicken — or my personal favorite ramen topping, pork char siu. Meat shortage got ya down? Just crack an egg. You can stir it right in to create an egg-drop soup effect, or poach the egg gently in the soup broth to enjoy breaking the creamy yolk.

Chicken-flavored ramen with garlicky sautéed kale, roasted chicken legs, and carrots.

2. Go big with toppings

Going nuts with the add-ons at ramen restaurants can mean spending $30 on a bowl of noodles (toppings normally cost between $1 and $3 each.) But at home, you can have as many toppings as the inventory of your fridge’s produce drawer allows: scallions, corn, mushrooms, kale, you name it. Not sure about what to do with all those weird greens in your CSA farm box? Add them to your instant noodles! Fact: There is no such thing as a lousy topping for instant noodles.

3. Deconstruct everything

Each element of the instant noodle package is a multi-purpose cooking superstar. The seasoning packets add a pop to stir-fried vegetables. Broken into bits, the uncooked noodles are an excellent crunchy topping for a salad or even another non-instant pasta dish. Do yourself a favor and add some ramen seasoning to mac and cheese, or how about using those instant noodles to make buns for an at-home ramen burger?

4. Switch up the liquid

To deepen the character of the soup, try cooking the noodles in vegetable or chicken broth instead of plain water. There are plenty of wilder recipes out there, including this one I’m skeptical of that uses milk, but homemade stock is a safe jumping off point.

5. Mash-up different styles

Mixing different instant noodle styles and seasoning packets is a culinary art form in itself, and can have big payoff. Jjapaguri (also called ram-don), the famous dish from the Oscar-winning movie Parasite, is actually just a hybrid of two different kinds of instant noodles — Neoguri and Jjappaghetti — and has become one of Korea’s national dishes. The magic comes from the mixing of Neguri’s spicy seafood powder with Jjappaghetti’s savory black bean powder, which ignites a lethal umami bomb. But jjapaguri is just the start. Try mixing Neoguri and curry noodles to create an exuberant, spicy curry broth. Combining super spicy noodles with something cheesy is also 100 percent never a bad idea.

Jjapaghetti goes well with fried egg

The Ones to Know

Here, then, are some of the best instant noodles to stock up on, categorized by whether or not they’re “brothy” (the noodle soup kind) or “saucy” (brothless noodles with a separate sauce).

BROTHY

MyKuali Penang White Curry Noodle If you love Penang curry, try adding this noodle to your cart. These wildly popular Malaysian instant noodles are considered some of the best in the world on this heavily opinionated ranking. Three whole flavor pouches — one of them is a paste — make for a deep, coconut-y taste and hearty portion size that you rarely get from instant noodles. Add toppings like fried tofu or prawns.

Neoguri, Spicy Seafood Udon Noodles Neoguri, a Korean word for raccoon dog (neither a raccoon nor a dog; discuss), has been my top choice for ramen since I started slurping noodles at the age of three. This beloved Korean instant noodle is known for two things: thick udon-like noodles and a spicy seafood broth with actual dried seafood. It’s fantastic with any fishy topping or add-ins.

Nongshim Shin Ramyun Noodle Soup Shin Ramyun might be the very first Korean instant noodle brand, as well as one of the easiest to find internationally: I still remember the exciting moment when I found Shin Ramyun in a random gas station in Alabama. It’s known for its spicy broth, and doubles as an excellent noodle for Korean ramen beginners. Top this with a slice of American cheese to tone down the spice and pump up the greatness.

Prima Taste Laksa Coconut Curry Lamian Noodles This Singaporean instant noodle inspired by traditional laksa has a paste sachet that can and should be used for stir-frying vegetables, too. The noodles are rounder and less wavy than others, and the white powder adds the signature creaminess.

Mama Noodles Thai cooking doesn’t shy away from acid, and neither do these Thai instant noodles, with just the right balance of acidic and salty flavors. The wavy noodles and the powdery seasonings make a great snack — though it may not be hearty enough to be a standalone meal. Beef it up with a hard-boiled egg and other vegetable toppings, like scallions.

Sapporo Ichiban Tokyo Chicken Momosan Ramen Think Japanese shoyu ramen, in instant form: salty, slightly smokey, and clean tasting. It’s great with plain old white-meat chicken breast — which is hard to say about anything, really.

Paldo Gomtang Oriental Style Noodles with Beef Soup Base Not all Korean instant noodles are spicy! This mild, creamy Korean noodle soup is inspired by gomtang, or beef bone broth. It has an intense beefiness and is excellent with hearty greens like cabbage or scallions. Add some ground beef to make it more filling.

Tseng noodles with black sesame sauce

SAUCY

Nongshim, Jjapaghetti (Noodle Pasta with jjajang Sauce) “On Sundays, I’m the chef for Jjapaghetti” has been a Korean catchphrase for more than a decade. A combination of two dishes — jajangmyun (black bean noodles) and spaghetti— this saucy Korean instant noodle is also what spurred the ram-don trend after its crucial role in Parasite. The accompanying savory black bean sauce is all it really needs, though I highly recommend a luxe drizzle of truffle oil, too.

Indomie Mi Goreng Instant Stir Fry Noodles If you haven’t tried this Indonesian instant noodle, stop what you’re doing and fix that immediately. The package comes with a liquid seasoning mix of savory onion-flavored oil, sweet-spicy chili sauce, and sweet soy sauce, creating a salty-and-sweet coating for the wavy noodles. Any optional toppings like grilled steak or boiled eggs are just gravy.

Samyang Extra Hot Chicken Flavor Ramen Are you up for #FireNoodleChallenge? Join the leagues of people who’ve filmed themselves slurping these dangerously spicy noodles. There are multiple flavor options available, from carbonara to curry, and all of them equally fiery. Cover this with lots of mozzarella cheese to tone down the heat to the point where you might actually enjoy it.

Tseng Noodles Scallion With Sichuan Pepper Flavor This Taiwanese instant noodle is all about texture. Its curling, knife-cut-like strands are a perfect match for the sauce. There are many different flavors, besides this scallion one, such as black sesame and shallots. Depending on the sauce, the noodles textures vary. Think of this as gourmet-tier, since it costs slightly more than other noodles, but it’s totally worth the splurge.

Paldo Bibim Myun Cold Noodle The spicy, tangy, sweet sauce of these Korean noodles will wake up even the dullest of palates. Cook the noodles until they’re just al dente, or still a little firm, then rinse them under cold water to get rid of any residual starch and achieve peak bounce and chew. The sauce packet is an excellent salad dressing, too. Add some chopped cucumber and hard-boiled egg for a clutch midnight snack, or add some ice cubes for a cooling summer treat.

Mom’s Dry Noodle Sichuan Spicy The Taiwanese knife cut-style noodles cling to the oily, spicy sauce for maximum slurpability. Top with a fried egg or fried cubed tofu and you can almost pretend you’re at a restaurant.

Mom’s Dry Noodle has dried ribbon noodles which have ideal textures for the sauce

from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2NkSTkS via Blogger https://ift.tt/2V92Rds

[hermitologist]

My 20 Favorite Records Of 2018

Hi. I made a list of my favorite records of the year again. People seem to enjoy these things, and I definitely enjoy tearing my hair out trying to figure out what I liked best, so here we are again.

 This years list is chock full of heavy/sludgy bummer jams, post-rock epics, and super aggressive metal and hardcore, with a few poppier and more adventurous indie records scattered about. The honorable mentions list gets a bit more eclectic if you’re looking for stuff that sounds a little less like it was birthed from the loins of the late-90s/early-00s Hydrahead and Relapse discography.

As always, I welcome your suggestions for records and podcasts I might’ve missed the boat on, no matter the genre. There’s way too much good stuff out there to keep up with, so help me out.

Also: When my aging corpse is not being pissy about being used for something other than child-wrangling, eating, or sleeping, I try to run a few days a week and will listen to/briefly review a record on each run. Almost every record on this list has been a part of one of those posts, so if you’re interested in such a thing, please check out my Instagram. 

BONUS: I put together playlists of my favorite song from each of my top 20 records, so if you’re overwhelmed and don’t know where to start, just throw it on and see if anything grabs you.

Hermitology’s Favorite 20 Records of 2018 - Spotify Playlist

Hermitology’s Favorite 20 Records of 2018 - Apple Music Playlist

20) Slugdge - Esoteric Malacology

This record is ridiculous in the best ways possible -- insane amounts of shredding, light-speed double bass and blast beats, and lyrics about slugs and other assorted beasts. It’s been ages since I went through my Swedish & Norwegian Metal phase, but this awakened those long-dormant receptors that used to hum when I listened to At The Gates, Opeth, Dimmu Borgir, Soilwork, et al.

Listen here.

19) Ingrina - Etter Lys

Excellent French doomgaze/post-rock that sounds like it could very easily be the soundtrack to the apocalypse. Etter Lys has a familiar sound/vibe, but a refreshing energy and captivating sense of dark melody that really makes them stand out to me. Highly recommended for fans of This Will Destroy You, Rosetta, God Is An Astronaut, et al.

Listen here.

18) Beach House - 7

This record was the perfect foil to all heavy stuff I listened to this year, and my go-to in-flight record of 2018. It’s a damn near perfect collection hazy, airy, dreamy, downtempo indie pop. I’d never been a huge Beach House fan, but 7 hooked me and pulled me in. Throw this your headphones on, press play, and melt into your chair or couch.

Listen here.

17) Culture Abuse - Bay Dream

This record was not what I was expecting, but it ended up being exactly what I needed. (If that makes any sense.) Instead of a grimy, high-energy punk record, I got a fuzzy, bouncy, catchy-as-hell soundtrack to my entire summer. A perfect blend of The Ramones and peak-Weezer, with a vibe all its own.

Listen here.

16) Deads - LLNN

Roughly forty minutes of insanely heavy and furious drop-tuned, down-tempo, doom-inspired crushers offset by eerie, cinematic synth parts. If you’re a fan of early-Cult of Luna and/or Isis, this record should be a new staple in your diet. There’s also enough atmosphere here to appeal to post-rock fans who might desire a little aggression boost.

Listen here.

15) Heads. - Collider

Beautifully written sludgy rock that falls somewhere between the heaviness and spookiness of Young Widows and the heroin-soaked atmosphere and melody of Failure. For what it’s worth, I dig Collider more than either of the aforementioned bands’ most recent output. It’s a perfect marriage of influences, killer songwriting, an excellent recording, and a flat out fantastic record from front to back.

Listen here.

14) mewithoutYou - [untitled]

I’ve been a mewithoutYou fan for ages and love everything they’ve done (so I’m a little biased), but this record is just on a completely different level as far as I’m concerned. It’s the peak of their creativity, songwriting, mood, dynamics, lyrics, production, etc. It’s got the atmosphere and moodiness of post-rock, the angular quirkiness of Fugazi, the energy of Refused (at times), and the all the character of a classic mwY record. It’s phenomenal, and doubly impressive because they made it 18 years deep into an already impressive career.

Listen here.

13) Foxing - Nearer My God

I was familiar with Foxing before this record came out because they’d toured with many former tourmates, and while I appreciated what I’d heard from them, they never really clicked with me. And then I heard this record and it totally floored me. It’s incredibly ambitious without coming across as super scatterbrained or pretentious and it’s executed flawlessly (production included). This band should be massive, and I’m stunned that I’m not seeing this record on more year-end lists

Listen here.

12) This Will Destroy You - New Others Part 1 & 2

Somehow TDWY managed drop two incredible full lengths a month apart, and I honestly cannot choose between the two (so I’m combining them into one). These LPs are arguably their best work as a band, the addition of Robi Gonzalez on drums has given their sound new energy, dynamics, and pocket, and there aren’t many bands in post-rock doing it as well as these dudes do. Incredibly impressive to be able to put out this much music all at once and have it be this consistent. 

Listen here.

11) The Armed - Only Love

Somehow this record manages to be chaotic, energetic, beautiful, delicate, catchy-as-hell, abrasive, and atmospheric all at once. Sometimes it sounds like you accidentally have five different songs playing at the same time. Somehow modular synth-soaked punk/metal works. Clearly I cannot explain exactly what in the everliving hell is happening here, but I can tell you that it’s a wholly arresting record that blew my mind on first listen, and has gotten better with every listen since.  

Listen here.

10) Hemwick - Junkie (EP)

Normally, I wouldn’t include an EP on this list, but this is one just too good to ignore. It’s 30 minutes of insane riffage and heaviness that sounds like it spawned from the same gene pool that produced Converge, Cult Leader, and Intronaut. It’s got the spazziness and brutality of the former, blended perfectly with the occasional post-rock/metal shift into the epic melody of the latter. Super excited to hear what comes next for these guys (hopefully an LP recorded with Scott Evans or Kurt Ballou?), because this is an incredibly promising “debut”. 

Listen here.

9) Architects - Holy Hell

As a standalone record, Holy Hell slays. As a follow-up to losing a family/band member to cancer (guitarist, Tom Searle), it’s a fucking triumph. Somehow Architects managed to push through the grief and heartache, and pushed the boundaries of their musical creativity and emotive lyrics to create what is arguably their best record. Holy Hell is packed to the gills with with massive, arena-sized riffs and moshworthy breakdowns, sprinkled with just enough melody and dynamic to keep things fresh without losing its edge. An amazing accomplishment in the face of such adversity.

 Listen here.

8) Slow Mass - On Watch

An outstanding fusion of mellow(er) post-hardcore, bummer jams, Unwound-inspired post-punk, and shimmery shoegazey goodness. “Suburban Yellow” (see playlist) is one of my favorite songs of the year, falling somewhere between the crushing gloominess of a Kowloon Walled City song, and the somber plod of a classic Pedro The Lion track. I tend to shy away from music with dual lead vocals (because I often prefer one of the voices to the point that I’d rather just hear it all the time), but Dave Collis and Mercedes Webb’s voices are so complimentary and perfectly balanced that they take these songs to another level. Bonus: I’d highly recommend watching their frigid Audiotree session. 

Listen here.

7) Hot Snakes - Jericho Sirens

One of my favorite bands of all-time put out its first record in 14 years, and it was well worth the wait. It’s Hot Snakes doing what they do best --  ripping 30 minutes of high-energy post-punk jams fueled by the brilliantly weird guitar wizardry of John Reis, and propelled by the dual drummer attack of Mario Rubalcaba and Jason Kourkounis. I’m not entirely sure where I’d rank it in their discography, but having fresh Hot Snakes tracks makes the world a better place. 

Listen here.

6) Cloud Nothings - Last Building Burning

What did we do to deserve two Cloud Nothings LPs in two years? I was a little worried about whether the band could churn out a record as fantastic as Life Without Sound (which landed at #7 on last year’s list), but they absolutely did. Last Building Burning builds on the catchiness and energy of LWS’s bummer jams, but adds a little extra grit, fury, and urgency. The result is a record that’s damn near peak Cloud Nothings. It’s got hooks for days, an energy that’ll make you want to bounce off the walls, and a nasty edge that brings to mind 80′s Wipers or early Hot Snakes jams.

Listen here.

5) Cult Leader - A Patient Man

Cult Leader’s Lightless Walk was a Top 5 record for me in 2015, Gaza’s No Absolutes In Human Suffering was in my Top 5 in 2012, so it should be no surprise that they’ve cracked the Top 5 again. I’d be hard pressed to name another HEAVY band who has done it for me the way these guys have over the past six years. A Patient Man hits all the notes -- pure chaos, expansive and melancholic post-rock sections, and the most headbang-worthy breakdowns on the planet. It’d take a miracle to get this 43-year-old geriatric with a bad back to come out of mosh retirement, but the breakdown in “Aurum Reclusa” is seriously making me think about a comeback.

Listen here.

4) Low - Double Negative

I don’t think I’ve had a record screw with my brain as hard as Double Negative did since I heard Kid A for the first time. It’s a spooky, brain-liquifying journey through sonic textures and ambience, arranged and mixed in a manner that is absolutely enthralling (and a bit unnerving and “wtf are my headphones broken?”at times). If you’re gearing up for a first listen, I’d highly recommend clearing an hour on your schedule, throwing on a good pair of headphones, and letting this have its way with you. If you’ve already heard it, you should listen to it again. It gets better and weirder and more captivating every time. It’s a trip, and a great one at that. 

Listen here.

3) Daughters - You Won’t Get What You Want

As a standalone record, this is groundbreaking. As a “comeback record” it’s a fucking triumph. Their S/T record (2010) is one of my favorite heavy/noise rock records of all-time, and somehow YWGWYW surpassed my lofty expectations for a follow-up. It’s a dizzying journey for sure. It’s moody as hell. It’s coherent. It’s adventurous without being overly weird. And it’s all of the best things about their previous work distilled into a perfect chunk of musical madness. The best records are the ones that make your brain matter spill out of your ears upon first listen, but it’s the all-time classics that do that and get better with every subsequent listen. Sure, it’s a record for “when the mood is right”, but when I’m in the mood, this hits all the notes for me. It’s a masterpiece. 

Listen here.

2) Holy Fawn - Death Spells

This record came out of nowhere and absolutely knocked me on my ass. I’m not sure I’ve had a record do that to me since I first heard Cloudkicker in 2009 -- knew nothing of it, had zero idea what to expect and literally had goosebumps for a majority of my first listen. Tempe’s Holy Fawn have created a unique blend of dense, dynamic, and cathartic post-rock, doom, and shoegaze with airy vocals that remind me a bit of Jonsi from Sigur Ros. It’ll be a daunting task to follow up this masterpiece, but I’m incredibly excited to see and hear what the future holds for these guys.

Listen here.

1) Pianos Become The Teeth - Wait For Love

This was one of my most anticipated records of the year, and it not only lived up to my lofty expectations, but exceeded them. “Bitter Red” was far and away my most played song of the year, and I must’ve listened to Wait For Love 50 times during the month of February alone. It’s no surprise that I found myself going back to it throughout the year, and in revisiting for this list, it gave me chills just like it did 10 months ago. These dudes are doing melancholic and cathartic post-hardcore better than just about anyone these days, and I cannot wait to hear what’s next for them.

Listen here.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Roughly 80% of these records could/should have very easily landed on the Top 20 list (and probably would if I obsessed over this list any further and gave everything a super dedicated re-listen). They’re all absolutely worth checking out.

I know this list might be a little daunting, so I put together a Spotify Playlist of my favorite songs from each record, so you can just throw it on and see if anything grabs you. 

Thanks to my man Zack Hite for helping me out and putting together an Apple Music version of the playlist. 

Hermitology’s 2018 Honorable Mentions Spotify Playlist

Hermitology’s 2018 Honorable Mentions Apple Music Playlist

Baptists - Beacon of Faith

Birds In Row - We Already Lost The World

Boygenius - S/T EP

Candy - Good to Feel

Coastlands - The Further Still

Conjurer - Mire

Death Engine - Place Noire

Drug Church - Cheer

Emma Ruth Rundle - Dark Horses

Failure - In the Future Your Body Will Be ... 

Fiddlehead - Springtime and Blind

Hammock - Universalis

IDLES - Joy As An Act Of Resistance

Jay Jayle - No Trail & Other Unholy Paths

Jesus Piece - Only Self

KEN Mode - Loved

Man Mountain - Infinity Mirror

Mogwai - KIN

Nate Smith - Pocket Change

OHHMS - Exist

Ólafur Aarnalds - re:member

Polyphia - New Levels, New Devils

Portrayal of Guilt - Let Pain Be Your Guide

Prefuse 73 - Sacrifices

Rolo Tomassi - Time Will Die … 

Sectioned - Annihilated

Slow Crush - Aurora

Snail Mail - Lush

SUMAC - Love In Shadow

Svalbard - It’s Hard To Have Hope

Taken - With Regards To (EP)

The Story So Far - Proper Dose

Tides of Man - Every Nothing

Vein - Errorzone

Yashira - Shrine

PODCAST QUEUE

The Deadcast (humor, sports, politics)

Chapo Trap House (politics, humor)

Hang Up & Listen (sports, culture, nerdy)

Effectively Wild (baseball)

The Frotcast (movies, humor)

The Trap Set (drums, psychology)

The Gist (current events, politics)

Song Exploder (songwriting, production)

The Modern Drummer Podcast (drums)

[loveglitteryinternetbouque-blog2]

Madden NFL 18 PlayStation four Review

April 1, 2016 - Soccer 2016 SU Sports Corridor of Fame Class Announced The Susquehanna University Division has announced the six members of the SU Sports Corridor of Fame Class of 2016. (Be aware to self: Don't make predictions.) There are a handful of examples of inventive sports video games'”Wii Sports activities, Rocket League'”from the previous decade that don't use a license from an expert or novice league, but none of them are variations of the nation's hottest sport, American soccer Madden NFL, meanwhile, has unsurprisingly stagnated, with the designers at EA Tiburon releasing a traditional if solid sport yr after 12 months after year. For a pair years, they mentioned, Madden has been attaching graphics on-display” to players as they move around the area. Madden NFL soccer is the undisputed king of sports activities video video games. It's still very much incomplete as a soccer recreation, nevertheless it's higher in nearly every space than its predecessor, and there is something to be said for incremental enchancment. An American soccer sport where the participant characters are represented as X's and 's on a monochrome display screen. MUT or Madden Ultimate Workforce is the entire NFL group building mode that your favorite NFL players have used. The graphics in Madden Mobile are perfectly acceptable, though I experienced some weird stadium glitches where the improper team's colours and emblem would sometimes appear during Season video games. With Madden sixteen now part of EA Access you'll be able to play this recreation and lots of others for $5 a month or as part of a $30 a 12 months membership to this system. Because a soccer sport can have all of the options on the earth, but if it doesn't play like a football sport, what's the point? Veteran ABC commentator Al Michaels made his debut in Madden 2002, replacing John Madden's longtime companion in each the true and virtual booth, Pat Summerall. Madden NFL 17 might be ninety % the same recreation you know and love, but that is positive. Though it's hit and miss once in a while, Madden NFL 18 roughly pulls this off. Madden Final Team is undoubtedly Madden's deepest mode, which has received a collection of updates to make it even more interesting to gamers. Recognizing the joys and strategy of these moments won't be anywhere close to enough to let me qualify as 'œa Madden man,' not with only a handful of semi-enjoyable games to my identify. Whereas Longshot is the most fascinating thing on this yr's sport, most Madden” players will spend their time in two extra traditional modes: Franchise and Final Crew. A specific permit from Parking and Transportation Providers is required for any College-owned car needing entry to the soccer complex on recreation day. Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick seems on the quilt of "Madden NFL 2004," then breaks his leg in a preseason sport, prompting widespread talk of a "Madden" cover curse. If you're not sure how they work, it would put you off nearly immediately but understanding the pros and cons of each is essential if you want to have a productive recreation of soccer. Due to the Lions' success, in the 1960's the National Soccer League decided it wanted to put on one other Turkey Day sport but had hassle getting a staff to conform to play, as it would be a huge danger for anybody who signed on. Weeknight video games have been nonetheless uncommon and a night slot on Thanksgiving would interrupt a lot of families' dinners. I've by no means been a fan of the grind that comes with the collectible card modes, but this year I was enticed to provide Madden Final Workforce a wholehearted probability with the Longshot components and the new 3v3 aggressive mode, MUT Squads, and was pleasantly stunned. The Championship may be English soccer's second tier nevertheless it attracts bigger crowds than the top divisions in most European nations. The college soccer season hasn't even kicked off yet and ticket costs for one of the best video games are already beating these of the National Football League. Great Safety script inside MADDEN NFL Soccer Hacker protects your privacy and device. "Playmaker" controls had been launched to great fanfare in Madden 2004, permitting a player on offense to basically control two players without delay. If you happen to've played Madden enough to actually evaluate the game to the actual factor, you will know that it never matched the chaos and power of the gridiron. At a pre-Super Bowl NFL press convention on Thursday, Super Bowl halftime performer Justin Timberlake could have implied that he has some sturdy feelings about whether or not he'd ever let his nearly 3-year-outdated son play football. Possibly it is the origin story of Devin Wade's soccer enjoying father — as a result of I simply can't get enough of that acting. The John Madden Football sequence remains to be in existence at the moment. Madden originally debuted in 1988, then under the name John Madden Football, and has been an annual staple in sports activities video games since 1990. Madden's first outing on the 3DS is disappointing, not for its gameplay however for its lack of multiplayer and rushed 3D graphics. And whereas folks prefer to say "Madden" is the same yearly, that's simply not true: The cumulative improvements to the sport's seems to be, physics, and general really feel are miles ahead of where the collection was two or three years ago. The Madden soccer series is the #1 selling football recreation in the historical past of video games.

Dad and mom must know that Madden NFL Soccer - 3DS is knowledgeable football simulation. Most packs could be bought using the coins you earn from common play, however the Gold Worth pack that's guaranteed to include 10 gold playing cards can only be bought using Madden Cash. However a wave of technology, the annual release of Madden included, has improved the soccer intelligence among the sport's young gamers. (TSX Enterprise: SCR) (theScore”), is as soon as again the go-to mobile vacation spot this football season, taking fans closer to the gridiron than ever before. For an additional $9 per 30 days, you can get NFL Crimson Zone and 6 completely different PAC12 channels, which turn this streaming service from a turkey day facet dish right into a season-long, all-you-can-eat soccer buffet. All this disguises a tutorial where, in some circumstances, you really study soccer plays. From what I've seen to date, the 3DS is courting avid gamers of all sorts, but those hoping to have a hardcore expertise in Madden NFL Soccer will be sadly disenchanted. Like a properly-worn set of cleats with new laces, the Madden franchise by no means fails to really feel each familiar and fresh. The opposite notable distinction between MUT Squads and normal Madden gameplay is that the usual digicam angle right here is zoomed out pretty far, giving it a different feel. Originally from Berlin, Werner played his method via high school and college to end up on the Indianapolis Colts, but his best teacher of the sport was no matter console Werner was playing Madden on. The way in which Werner described this was as if some of us got to satisfy Mario in real life. Ever since, on-line football has developed with every successive season, generally for the higher (resembling with the old Site that let you observe your team and league stats) and oftentimes for the more severe (One phrase: cheesers. Also launching this season is the Madden 17 Membership Sequence, which is able to feature dwell Madden NFL tournaments produced by taking part NFL groups.

[todaysbiggesthits]

The Exam

Best Music Moment of 2017:

Code: dancing out the entire wedding reception playlist with my best girl on an empty concrete slab on a breezy texas night

BC: -The absolute stellar dance party at Codemin’s Wedding; most notably:

     “Carol” by The Rolling Stones

     “Enjoy the Silence” by Depeche Mode

     “Crystal” by New Order

-OK Computer’s 20th Anniversary and the listening/reflection that came with it -My four year old, Emmett, learning “Maps” on the drums pretty much on his own

JD: February: Watching the “Emotional Rescue” scene in A Bigger Splash:

March: Seeing Stop Making Sense on the big screen at my favorite theater with m’gal and a David Byrne Q&A after the screening. April: The dance party of a lifetime at Code and Arden’s wedding. November: Watching Parquet Courts play “You’ve Got Me Wondering Now” for the first time in years.

C: "Born to Run" at a good friend's, Brian Ferguson's, wedding.

Nasty: This playing at the end of Leftovers Season 3, Ep 5 - "The Most Powerful Man in the World"

Bronco: Sitting on my back porch with Brenny, sipping down some delicious whiskey drinks and listening to the new Mastodon on a surprisingly unshitty Amazon bluetooth speaker. Watching his face on the breakdown in Jaguar God was quite entertaining. Also listening to the Squalus album (the metal interpretation of Jaws) with the kids, my oldest asking what it was, and him saying he wants to watch Jaws now. He was especially fascinated by the USS Indianapolis part of the story.

Laser: This 

Chap: My 17 has been dominated by the two new ladies in my life. I made this mix for them:

and played it for them on random the morning they were born. This was the first song that came on:

and I finally broke down with emotion after the 36 hour experience while holding one of them while this song was playing:

Best Shows Seen in 2017:

BC: This first 60 seconds of this:

Nasty: Future Islands & Action Bronson

Larse: Future Islands with Maddie, Nasty, and Sam; Action Bronson at The Rave - pretty sure I got a contact high just from being in the show

C: War on Drugs

Bronco: Mastodon

Codem: lvl up - beat kitchen kitten forever - subterranean downstairs ovlov - beat kitchen pqc - the bottle girlpool - logan square auditorium moving units’ joy division cover set - the bottle PAWS - cobra lounge a. savage - the bottle pictureplane

JD: 1. William Basinski and Julianna Barwick at National Sawdust 2. No Age at Elsewhere 3. Parquet Courts and B-Boys at Elsewhere 4. Liars at Warsaw 5. Deerhunter and Eleanor Friedberger performing while Bradford Cox painted her portrait onstage at Warsaw 6. LCD Soundsystem at Brooklyn Steel 7. Yo La Tengo in Central Park 8. Andrew WK at Warsaw 9. Vince Staples at Panorama Fest 10. Wire at Baby’s All Right 11. Vagabon at Brooklyn Bazaar

Confession of 2017:

Bronco: I listened to the New Kids On The Block offering of 2017 "Thankful" (it was fucking terrible).

C: Still haven’t listened to LCD Soundsystem

Code: -knowing the backstory, the mount eerie album was probably the best album i heard this year, but it was too dang sad to listen to more than a handful of times. -i still loved that brand new song despite the lead cat being a creep. -i thought that this year was pretty rough for music, but my tune changed after looking back through my top tracks.  maybe there were just so few full albums that i liked? -i fast fwd'd through every SNL musical guest this calendar year, but i did catch the tom petty tribute from the vegas countrymin. 

BC: I don’t hate that objectively awful Chainsmokers/Coldplay song because it reminds me of this year’s BOB since Creevey played it every twenty minutes for 36 holes.

Larson: Listened to more rap this year than I think I have in past years; must be Nasty's Lincoln influence!

Nasty: I listened to more podcasts than music in 17.

Biggest Disappointment of 2017:

Laser: LCD Soundsystem

Codem: -no chromatics this year. -the two lcd shows that i saw this year.

Chap: The albums. I would not be shocked if I didn't listen to any of my top 15 all the way through after today.

Bin: DJT

JD: Mondanile

BC: Real Estate.  I think they need to invite the perv back into the band.

Bronco: Bison, Monolord, Godspeed You! Black Emperor, And So I Watch You From Afar. They all put out albums this year, and I've like their stuff in the past, but they did little to nothing for me this time around.

Most Overrated of 2017:

Codem: slowdive, but also twod and japanese breakfast

Bin: Bodak Yellow / Cardi B

Larse: LCD Soundsystem

Bronco: -Pallbearer - just don't like the guy's voice, and though they're slow as shit, there's no good riffs or anything to connect with for me. -Code Orange - hardcore band that I just don't get. One of those 'motherfucker I'm the best!' type super close to being alt-right supremecy type bands even though they're probably completely against it. They're at the top of most metal lists this year. I've given them 4-5 spins, most in reaction to the praise they're getting, but I just don't get it. -Royal Thunder - just one big case of blue balls. All of their songs seemingly build toward a climax that never happens. It's just so blech.

JD: Did the music press even treat anything as a lasting work of art and not ephemeral content to get through a week or two of famous personality driven clicks? King Krule? 

BC: Lorde, I think?  I mean, that album’s gotten a lot of love this year and I thought the lead single – “Green Light” – was hot garbage. It spawned a conspiracy theory in my mind that Taylor Swift was proactively influencing and then purposefully sabotaging the work of her close friends (see Lorde, Haim, et al).

Make it Stop 2017

Bronco: Sex monsters. Can we just take all white dudes in powerful positions, assume they've sexually assaulted at least one person, imprison them, and move on? We could take everything they have, give it all to Native American tribes, then force them to walk their own trail of tears to live out their lives in the desserts of New Mexico, and force them to build the wall, but it would just be a wall around their sad sex monster reservation.

Also, Taylor Swift.

Nasty: I didn't have the luxury of expending any real hate on music this year... which I'm just now recognizing as a bad thing.

JD: -Unceasing sadness and anxiety about the present and future. -Jack Antonoff

BC: Life on this planet.

Code: any rap station that i hear in an uber. that cardi b song was playing every time i caught a cab at 5:30 a.m. to play golf.

Larson: U2

Biggest TBH Regret of 2017:

BC: Not seeing NIN at RiotFest

Larson: Skipping the Car Seat Headrest show at Summerfest because I could tell Maddie didn't want to leave Jonas' party (party was fun, so not a real loss, just wish I would have seen the show).

Nasty: Not even giving new artists a chance. I'll listen to an average album from The National 10x's before I give someone new a shot.

Codebreaker: not having an opportunity to karaoke badu's tyrone

JD: -Had the worst fever of my life during LCD and could only manage standing in the back shivering. -Forgetting to go see Dinner at Baby’s All Right. -Not enough time with Bjork, Miguel, and Blanck Mass. 

Bronco: Fucked up the family calendar maintenance and ended up not being able to see the Toadies and Local H. I was pissed at my wife, but it wasn't the end of the world. I haven't listened to either in forever, and the listen I gave to the Toadies latest offering didn't knock my socks off. It was really just for nostalgic purposes. Still it sucked to have to miss it despite my best efforts to bring it to her attention multiple times.

Detective Murtaugh of 2017:

NACK: I had two separate opportunities to see LCD, and just didn't feel like putting in the effort. Was going to put this as a regret, but I don't regret it.

Code: i skipped 7 shows that i had tickets for and left 6 shows early. two shows i left early due to brightness of lights.  mmmmmnhh

JD: Couldn’t hear for 18 hours after No Age. Needed two Tylenol for the headache I gave myself during “You’ve Got Me Wondering Now” at PQ Quartz.

BC: Having no idea who either the SNL host or the musical guest was for three straight weeks.  Tiffany Haddish? Saoirse Ronan? SZA? I’m too old for this shit…

Nasty: Carson, Maddie, Sam and I went to watch the IU game this weekend with one of Carson's co-workers (an IU grad) who is 23.... I got rolling on a rant about how important it is to enjoy your 20s because after the impending onslaught of weddings and babies life basically isn't any fun anymore. Suspect it was a little too impassioned by the end.

Bronco: I was enrolled in a three month coding bootcamp to learn Web Development. Aside from the two older ladies (50+) and the weird Brazilian idiot (45+), I was the oldest person in the room by probably an average of 13 years. They are all for the most part life-pivoting in to the dev world and they all have all the time in the world to learn new shit, do whatever they want, whenever they want...goddamnit I miss that. So maybe this is my "too married and fathered for this shit" section of the exam.

C: Wife’s Pregnancy

Laser: Every time I wake up with a fucking hangover and tell myself that I’m not gonna drink like that again only to get back on the saddle the next available opportunity.

Resolution for 2017 Update:

BC: Put a goddamn band together. How it went: 

C: Check out some jazz/blues in Chicago. How it went: FAILED

Larson:  Focus on the shit I really care about instead of trying to listen to everything posted on the thread…I’m just going to have to be honest with myself and realize I ain’t got time for all this media! How it went: Terrible; found myself listening to Timeless Pop Rock hits playlist more than anything else.

Chap: Check out more of the recommendations on the TBH thread. Try to organize get-togethers around TWO shows. How it went: Actually not bad. I had a few solid period during nap times when I didn't feel like working. I think I was able to listen to every album I wanted to at least once.

Code: make concerted effort to listen to music that i liked in previous years in addition to music from the current year. How it went: i nailed my resolution, as i devoted four full months to the grateful dead and it was the best musical trimester of the year for me. it was really interesting to watch all of the new music pile up and never once feeling compelled to listen to something else. god damn did the '77 version of the band have it all figured out. i could listen to any uptown mississippi halfstep toodeloo from that year at any time.

Bronco: Learn the guitar. I’ve been fooling around with Rocksmith (guitar hero with real guitar) and I want to push myself to execute the more complex chords, not just stick to the powerchord simple songs like Blitzkrieg Bop, and start learning how to build and execute a solo. I also want to distill my own whiskey, build a garden shed from scratch, and learn to code. How it went: I haven't quite mastered the guitar, but I can play a few songs fairly well. I did not start working on my own whiskey or build a garden shed from scratch...yet. But I did learn to code. I am now at conversational levels of fluency with Javascript and at "donde es el bano" levels with Ruby and Python.

Nasty: See a show in NY with JD. How it went: Not great, Bob! I barely made it down the street to see Action Bronson with Laser 

JD: Seeing more shows with you guys is an evergreen resolution. How it went: To quote BC,

Resolution for 2018:

BC: No more resolutions

C: Catch some jazz in Chicago

Laser: get my list in on time!

Chap: While I didn't have the occasion to catch shows this year, I anticipate doing so in '18 due to some changes afoot.

Codem: make more playlists for my wife

Bronco: Get in shape. I want to stick to a schedule of running all year round. I ran a 10K back in June, then needed to recover for a bit, been recovering ever since...Fat Dad needs to keep running all year round without excuse, especially given that we go skiing between Xmas and New Year's and I'm gonna be a floppy legged mess. During those runs, I'll try to listen to new material each time.

Bin: I'm just going to keep saying "get to NY for a show with JD" until I make it happen. 

JD: See you gents more often with or without a show attached. 

Most Anticipated of 2018:

C: MBV

JD: MBV, No Age, Panda Bear, something surprising

Code: chromatics (i think it's really coming this year), mbv, no age, DOM, CCFX full album

Bronco: Tool. Fourth year's the charm...fuck those guys. It better suck me off when it finally does come out. Also a new Sleep album and a new High on Fire album...still waitin' on those too.

BC: Simple Minds, Vampire Weekend, Kanye

Nasty: Kanye, ASAP Rocky, Rhye, Chromeo, Vampire Weekend

Chap: After a quick glance at the list... Vampire Weekend, Kanye, Chromatics

Larse: Honestly don't even know what is on the horizon, just hope I can listen to it with this net neutrality bullshit!

[tales0fthenugget]

Asian Food (part 1)

I am a proud Asian for a lot of reasons. One of which is cheap yummy food!!! Yes, three exclamation points as just the thought of it already makes me excited. The rich and endless variety of flavor and spices will never disappoint. It's nothing new actually as history also tells us about Westerners expeditions to the East to find spices, right? And the bonus here is that it's not expensive and it's pretty common.

I've been in most of the east Asian countries. When I started to travel, I didn't think too much about food. I was too thin in college and all I knew to eat was rice (screaming Asian!) and sweets. So imagine my happiness when I discovered food and eating as part of travel. And again since I like lists, let me share memorable food in each of the Asian countries I visited. I didn't say yummiest or unique in the place but memorable a.k.a. my favorites, hehe. It would probably be my go-to food should I go back to these countries. Btw, I would exclude the Philippines in this list as I spent my life living here. My list would never end if I include it ;) Please also excuse how I try to describe the food's taste. I am so bad at it because I'm not used to writing about food. I only want to eat!! Haha. I hope the pictures and my memories/adventures that go with it could compensate.

THAILAND (5)

My first ever out of the country trip was Thailand. It was my parents' graduation gift to me after college. I had no concept then of eating local food. I was with my sister who was on a business trip. We would only eat at restaurants. I've only tasted street food once, which was when she was working and I was left alone to roam around and eat. I didn't know then that I missed a lot! Very fortunately for me, I've had four more trips to Thailand after the first one. I think this is actually the country I've returned to the most. Since the second trip, which was backpacking - naturally means hostel and street food for me, I've had more chance of eating local food. Limiting my list to four is a huge challenge. But here it goes. 

1. Pad thai from the streets near Ratchathewi BTS station. My sisters like pad thai so much that we would order pad thai in almost every meal we eat. I've tasted so much variety in Bangkok alone but this one's the yummiest! The oilyness is just right. This i.e. oily in particular is my issue in pad thais sold in a cart. It was so good that my sister tried to find the cart again before we leave going to the airport.

2. 7-11 drinks i.e. Ovaltine, milk tea and coffee. I'm not new to living off the ever so reliable 7-11. I lived away from home in college and I'm a really bad cook, 7-11 became one of my best friends for cheap food. But I like Thailand 7-11 most for the drinks I mentioned which should not be a surprise as Thailand is known for these drinks (except perhaps Ovaltine - this is just a personal preference). The cart versions are a little cheaper and just as yummy. But the 7-11 version is more accessible and maybe cleaner? Haha, I think.

3. Fried chicken soup in Chatuchak weekend market was a late discovery. All my trips we went to Chatuchak. I am not very fond of shopping so I usually end up eating to nearby carts/hawker from where my siblings or friends were buying. It was super yummmmmmyyyyyyy! I think this is already my favorite food in Bangkok! And do you see that little green thing? I have no idea what you call it or what it's made of but we liked that a lot. I tried to look for this in shops to buy and bring home but I didn't find any. :( Despite being in Chatuchak for five times, I still look forward to going there for this.

4. Khao Soi is my favorite from Chiang Mai. This one from Khao Soi Kun Yai is one of the most recommended place to eat this Northern Thailand coconut curry noodle soup! Oh and I ordered this with the longgan juice.

SINGAPORE (4)

If you personally know me, you wouldn't expect that Singapore is my second most visited country following Thailand. You won't hear me talking about my trip nor you'll see me post photos in social media. That's because all my trips to Singapore are work-related. That's why I also have limited experience eating in hawkers and I only have one photo of my memorable food. Most of my meals are with business partners so I felt a little shy to start taking photos of our food before eating. So the only photo I have below is when I ate alone.

1. Chili crab tops my list. I like seafood so this is not a surprise. The first time I had it from a restaurant I already forgot but it's near Mandarin and along the Marina boardwalk(?). So that was the most memorable. The crab was served with yummy fried mantao bread which I enjoyed munching together with the chili sauce. Plus we ordered prawn cereals too. The crab was of really good quality, but I had difficulty eating because again I was too shy because I ate clumsily. Lol! I didn't know how to use chopsticks - I made sure I learn better next time. Because I was too proud to just ask for spoon and fork. The shell was relatively soft but I was also not used to using crab cracker and uhm, chopsticks. I was itching to use my hands, hahahahaha. That's how I do it back home. But of course, I didn't. It was only my fourth month in my first work out of college, and I went on a business trip with one of the bosses. He's really nice but we weren't really close so I had to behave. Hehe.

2. Kaya toast with two soft-boiled eggs (and milk tea, of course) had been my staple food during my first business trip. I was there for two weeks. I would buy these for morning or afternoon (or both) snack.

3. Cedele soups from our old office in Novena square. I am a soup person! My previous boss recommended that place to me. I would order soup plus a small sandwich or chocolate bar to go with it. Haha, it has become my go to place when I have to eat alone and too lazy to go somewhere and eat.

TAIWAN (3)

Another place which I associate to work is Taiwan. This used to be a country I've been to the longest in terms of total number of days until my Canada trip in 2015. Similar to Singapore, I have limited hawker/streetfood experience. And the two trips had also been a little stressful for work because of language barrier. But that doesn't mean I didn't enjoy the food, the tea, and ice cream/milkshake from Coldstone whose store I always passby on my way home to the hotel. But third time's the charm! My latest out of the country trip was Taipei - a personal trip, for the first time :) I still had to work but the food trip experience is so much better! Because we have enough time (6 days), we did not hesitate to take our time eating and lining-up for food. Like Thailand, it's so hard to limit my list into four.

1. Black Pepper Pork Bun from Raohe night market invites a long line throughout the night. It was worth it - freshly cooked I.e. super hot, and with generous pork servings at TWD 50. The black pepper flavor adds just the right spice popping inside your mouth. Oh and I looooove the bread!!! I'm already thinking of going back. Lol!

2. Prince Cheese Potato! We love cheese! We love potato! It's perfect. We love it so much, we bought it every night we spent in Taipei city. Available in night markets - I've seen this in Ximending and the one in Shilin also has long line. Imagine mashed potato, wrapped in crispy and freshly cooked golden brown breading, sliced, topped with your other favorite ingredients like corn or bacon, and finally cheese sauce all over. Whew.

3. Fuhang Soy Milk place has insane line, but never mind. I’m even planning to  go back next time I’m in town. Best soy milk ever!! I also love the bread and egg - as in they bake their own bread, huhuhu. Lastly,t here’s this salty  soy which I found weird at the beginning. I’m used to eating taho since my childhood. Taho is also soy but usually with sugar syrup. So this explains why the savory version with shrimp flavor is so weird for me but I eventually found super yummy.

Yes, this one looks like bread on bread. Lol!!!

Salty Soy!

4. Ay Chung flour rice noodle, which in my country is called misua. I thought it’s boring, plain noodles. I never thought that there’s a version that is not boring and plain!  It’s flavorful and the noodles - I don’t know how to describe it but think of al dente for pasta. Lol! Similar to the others, there’s a long line but service was quick. And of course, it’s worth it.

Okay, so I have to stop for now because my phone note app is not allowing me to type some more. I’ll resume with part 2 next time. And I’m getting hungry too!

[brido]

Mike and Vicky Go to Ecuador (Day 1)

I didn’t think I’d ever make it to Quito. That might sound like I’m stating the obvious, but if I didn’t go to Quito, that would end my self-important streak of visiting my sister in every city she’s lived in during her tenure in the foreign service. That streak has not only a weirdly competitive source of pride for me over the years, but also a weirdly consistent source of my stand-up material, from bullfights in Lima to ordering pizza in an Irish pub in Montevideo. These trips to see Susan have been a really special and surprising thing for me in my life. I mean, I pretty much had to go to Quito.    

So as my wife and I nervously dropped off our giant seven-month-old Bernese ‘puppy’ at an extended daycare, we headed out of L.A.( just as the Dodgers were hosting the World Series for the first time in 29 years) and we spent a travel day going L.A. to Houston and from Houston to Quito. I was unsure what to expect from a city and a country that was, to an embarrassing degree, a mystery to me. All I really knew was that we wouldn’t have time for the Galapagos, I should be scared shitless of the altitude and we’d be getting up early the next morning to pile into a van with my sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephew for a full day of sight seeing curated by the fam. And so that’s what we did. 

Here was Day 1.  

Our first stop was Hacienda La Compania de Jesus in Cayambe. And as we were greeted by women in traditional indigenous Kayambi garb offering bizcochos and blackberry juice, as well as a young tour guide in a faded Jack Skellington t-shirt, I realized I had no idea what the hell was going on.

The Hacienda isn’t mentioned in the Ecuadorian travel book I bought and skimmed before the trip, but for the past 15 years, the Jarrin family has apparently been giving tours of their old estate. That includes a big, hundred-year-old French neoclassic home with all original everything, an old barn that now functions as a showroom and a 300-year-old Jesuit chapel - all of the above ornamented in an amount of cut roses that I’d have to classify as ‘an overflowing fuckload’ of cut roses.

There were hundreds of rose pedals in the fountain out front. You couldn’t go anywhere inside the big old house without seeing at least one giant bouquet of roses. And the aforementioned showroom was where the Hacienda really flexed its rose-having muscles. They weren’t even pretending you were supposed to be impressed with old furniture or other antiques. That was just them going, “We run Rosadex, a massive rose greenhouse/plantation and export roses to about 50 countries. Look at it. It’s an overflowing fuckload of roses!” Fair enough.

On your standard FTD delivery website, you can get a bouquet of two dozen roses with a vase for about $75. In Ecuador, you can buy about a billion roses for a dollar. Really. Because of the direct, year-round sunlight on the equator and the high altitude (about 9600 feet), the roses grow perfectly straight and the setting is basically perfect. So in a pretty short amount time, these Ecuadorian roses have become one of the biggest exports of the entire country (along with oil, bananas and shrimp in case you’re some kind of nerd). They have long stem roses for the Russians, the dyed circus colors for the Chinese and even a deep blue option that I was told is popular at gang funerals in Los Angeles. I’m not kidding. The place is just lousy with the roses.

We saw the greenhouses. We saw the ‘post-harvest room’. The latter was so colorful and impressive that I almost forgot the part when our tour guide told us that the hacienda had been in his wife’s family for five generations -  ever since King Charles III of Spain kicked all the Jesuits out of Spain and its colonies in 1767. I immediately thought, “Wait. What?” And that thought kind of followed me around the rest of the tour. What type of Game of Thrones shit happened with King Charles and the Jesuits in 1767??? But I’d have to get back to that later.

I did manage to Google the Jarrin family later on and noticed that Jaime Jarrin, the Spanish Vin Scully, was born in Cayambe. So I’m thinking he has to be a member of the hacienda family. But before I could ask more questions, the tour was over and I was back in the van with my family headed off to another sight in the Ecuadorian highlands. But what the fuck happened with King Chuck and the Jesuits?   

Next, the van made a brief pitstop at a place called Mira Lago in San Pablo Del Lago, which was a souvenir shop overlooking the Imbabura volcano and (obviously) a lake. Because of Mira Lago’s name similarity to our current president’s favorite West Palm Beach cake restaurant or whatever, I thought standing by the sign with a confused look on my face would make for an amusing photo. But that’s before I saw the view… and the llamas.

Inside the gift shop, a traditional Andean band, which appeared to be a family, played charangos, guitars, seed shakers, a siku panpipe and sang in either Quechua or Aymara. I’m not sure. I don’t speak indigenous Andean. But I did fucking love them. I’ve tried to find them Online and I think their name is Ayllu Pura and they’re like the Incan version of the Staples Singers. This video doesn’t really do them justice, but whatever. It’s there and I think it’s pretty sweet. Anyway, Victoria bought some cool-looking scarves there and we left.    

Our destination lunch was at Hacienda Cusin, also in San Pablo Del Lago. The estate itself is said to date back to 1602. But the hacienda is a restored 19th Century country home that gradually added garden cottages to become a cobblestone-pathed, terra-cotta-lined, magical rustic hotel with a magical rustic ambience. Do you like Spanish tiles? Do you like more antiques? What about ancient trees? And what about more llamas? You do? Well, they got you. And it’s so dope.

All of that said, the actual food at lunch was the least impressive part of the visit. I mean, I didn’t think so at the time. It’s just that my mind would be blown on multiple lunches on this trip and I can’t honestly say I remember what I ate at Hacienda Cusin as much as I just remember being introduced to the tree tomato (a mango-ish/apricot-ish/passion-fruit-flavored tomato) and the naranjilla (an orange that tastes like a combination of rhubarb and lime) for the first time. The rest of the food was a shrug.  But that’s fine with me. I got to go to an old hacienda (the non-Jesuit kind, mind you) that made me feel like I was living in a Spanish-tiled version of the Led Zeppelin IV ZOSO cover.

The final van trip of the day was to the small village of Peguche, which is known for incredibly talented indigenous weavers and for a picturesque 60-foot ceremonial waterfall in a protected forrest.  

The weaving stores in the village were pretty incredible. So was the waterfall, but you kinda just walk up to it, get your picture taken, stand there and take in how neat it is and leave. Maybe you chicken out on climbing some rocks to get a better photo. Maybe you decide you’re too fat to try to get a photo on a llama.  Maybe all of that happened and it’s best we move on to the weavers.  

In Jose Cotacachi, the workers, all in traditional clothing, demonstrated how they made their wall hangings, shawls, scarves and ponchos from the looms all the way down to the production of the dyes they still make by hand. At one point, a woman who worked there took cochineal eggs from a cactus and smashed them in her palm, using the pigment the insects use to repel predators and added lemon juice and paprika and other stuff to create all sorts of different colors. And it was almost badass how cocky she was about it too. Like, Yeah, I just did that shit. Buy something. 

In another store, Artesania El Gran Condor, Victoria bought a beautiful multicolored table cloth and placemats, while I turned down an offer from my sister to buy me a poncho. These are the types of attire, when worn back in Los Angeles, that can get someone accused of cultural appropriation by the Woke Police. Even though, like, the entire purpose and income of these indigenous markets (especially in the surrounding market of Otavalo) is to sell their fucking wares to dipshit tourists like me.

Anyway, after our first big day of exploring, the fam, including my exhausted niece and nephew, headed back to Quito in the van. My niece, who is 7, got roaring mad at me for some reason or another along the way (I think I ate a piece of her candy), until I sang a song I made up on the spot that went, “I’m so sorry in the van. Won’t you ever shake my hand,” that became such a hit with the kids that it was requested randomly and enthusiastically throughout the rest of the trip. What can I say? Much like the real “Weird” Al Yankovic, my target audience is probably elementary school children.  

Back in Quito, the adults stayed up a bit longer, ordered specialty sushi rolls from a place called Noe and watched Game 7 of the ALCS. The Astros won and were headed to the World Series to face the Dodgers. And I was headed to bed. Thus concluded Day 1.

[easyfoodnetwork]

The Ultimate Guide to Instant Noodles

A variety of instant noodles from different countries | James Park

How to mash-up, deconstruct, and altogether upgrade the versatile staple of dorm room dining

As a semi-professional noodle slurper and collector, I’ve eaten hundreds of noodles in my life, but I have a particular soft spot for one type, specifically: the instant kind. You know, those hard squiggly bricks of dried, fried noodles with accompanying seasoning packets that have long been the foundation of the American collegiate diet. Since the pandemic started, I’ve been showing off my impressive collection of instant noodles to my friends on FaceTime like a YouTube beauty guru flaunting their makeup stash.

I love instant noodles for many reasons: They have a nearly indefinite shelf life; they are an easy breakfast, snack, or — with the right bolstering — a full meal; and, they come in a panoply of shapes, textures, flavors, and colorful packaging styles. But while there is nothing wrong with eating instant noodles according to the instructions, it’s their versatility that’s made me a devoted fan. Here’s how to mash-up, deconstruct, and upgrade the dorm room staple.

1. Load up on protein

Yes, many instant noodles come with their own packets of dehydrated vegetable or meat flavoring, but they rarely provide much real taste and add zero in the way of texture. Supplementing your own additional proteins will do a lot to make your instant noodles more satisfying and nutrition-rich. Try simple items like ground meat, sausage, tofu, and leftover fried chicken — or my personal favorite ramen topping, pork char siu. Meat shortage got ya down? Just crack an egg. You can stir it right in to create an egg-drop soup effect, or poach the egg gently in the soup broth to enjoy breaking the creamy yolk.

James Park

Chicken-flavored ramen with garlicky sautéed kale, roasted chicken legs, and carrots.

2. Go big with toppings

Going nuts with the add-ons at ramen restaurants can mean spending $30 on a bowl of noodles (toppings normally cost between $1 and $3 each.) But at home, you can have as many toppings as the inventory of your fridge’s produce drawer allows: scallions, corn, mushrooms, kale, you name it. Not sure about what to do with all those weird greens in your CSA farm box? Add them to your instant noodles! Fact: There is no such thing as a lousy topping for instant noodles.

3. Deconstruct everything

Each element of the instant noodle package is a multi-purpose cooking superstar. The seasoning packets add a pop to stir-fried vegetables. Broken into bits, the uncooked noodles are an excellent crunchy topping for a salad or even another non-instant pasta dish. Do yourself a favor and add some ramen seasoning to mac and cheese, or how about using those instant noodles to make buns for an at-home ramen burger?

4. Switch up the liquid

To deepen the character of the soup, try cooking the noodles in vegetable or chicken broth instead of plain water. There are plenty of wilder recipes out there, including this one I’m skeptical of that uses milk, but homemade stock is a safe jumping off point.

5. Mash-up different styles

Mixing different instant noodle styles and seasoning packets is a culinary art form in itself, and can have big payoff. Jjapaguri (also called ram-don), the famous dish from the Oscar-winning movie Parasite, is actually just a hybrid of two different kinds of instant noodles — Neoguri and Jjappaghetti — and has become one of Korea’s national dishes. The magic comes from the mixing of Neguri’s spicy seafood powder with Jjappaghetti’s savory black bean powder, which ignites a lethal umami bomb. But jjapaguri is just the start. Try mixing Neoguri and curry noodles to create an exuberant, spicy curry broth. Combining super spicy noodles with something cheesy is also 100 percent never a bad idea.

James Park

Jjapaghetti goes well with fried egg

The Ones to Know

Here, then, are some of the best instant noodles to stock up on, categorized by whether or not they’re “brothy” (the noodle soup kind) or “saucy” (brothless noodles with a separate sauce).

BROTHY

MyKuali Penang White Curry Noodle If you love Penang curry, try adding this noodle to your cart. These wildly popular Malaysian instant noodles are considered some of the best in the world on this heavily opinionated ranking. Three whole flavor pouches — one of them is a paste — make for a deep, coconut-y taste and hearty portion size that you rarely get from instant noodles. Add toppings like fried tofu or prawns.

Neoguri, Spicy Seafood Udon Noodles Neoguri, a Korean word for raccoon dog (neither a raccoon nor a dog; discuss), has been my top choice for ramen since I started slurping noodles at the age of three. This beloved Korean instant noodle is known for two things: thick udon-like noodles and a spicy seafood broth with actual dried seafood. It’s fantastic with any fishy topping or add-ins.

Nongshim Shin Ramyun Noodle Soup Shin Ramyun might be the very first Korean instant noodle brand, as well as one of the easiest to find internationally: I still remember the exciting moment when I found Shin Ramyun in a random gas station in Alabama. It’s known for its spicy broth, and doubles as an excellent noodle for Korean ramen beginners. Top this with a slice of American cheese to tone down the spice and pump up the greatness.

Prima Taste Laksa Coconut Curry Lamian Noodles This Singaporean instant noodle inspired by traditional laksa has a paste sachet that can and should be used for stir-frying vegetables, too. The noodles are rounder and less wavy than others, and the white powder adds the signature creaminess.

Mama Noodles Thai cooking doesn’t shy away from acid, and neither do these Thai instant noodles, with just the right balance of acidic and salty flavors. The wavy noodles and the powdery seasonings make a great snack — though it may not be hearty enough to be a standalone meal. Beef it up with a hard-boiled egg and other vegetable toppings, like scallions.

Sapporo Ichiban Tokyo Chicken Momosan Ramen Think Japanese shoyu ramen, in instant form: salty, slightly smokey, and clean tasting. It’s great with plain old white-meat chicken breast — which is hard to say about anything, really.

Paldo Gomtang Oriental Style Noodles with Beef Soup Base Not all Korean instant noodles are spicy! This mild, creamy Korean noodle soup is inspired by gomtang, or beef bone broth. It has an intense beefiness and is excellent with hearty greens like cabbage or scallions. Add some ground beef to make it more filling.

Tseung noodles with black bean sauce

SAUCY

Nongshim, Jjapaghetti (Noodle Pasta with jjajang Sauce) “On Sundays, I’m the chef for Jjapaghetti” has been a Korean catchphrase for more than a decade. A combination of two dishes — jajangmyun (black bean noodles) and spaghetti— this saucy Korean instant noodle is also what spurred the ram-don trend after its crucial role in Parasite. The accompanying savory black bean sauce is all it really needs, though I highly recommend a luxe drizzle of truffle oil, too.

Indomie Mi Goreng Instant Stir Fry Noodles If you haven’t tried this Indonesian instant noodle, stop what you’re doing and fix that immediately. The package comes with a liquid seasoning mix of savory onion-flavored oil, sweet-spicy chili sauce, and sweet soy sauce, creating a salty-and-sweet coating for the wavy noodles. Any optional toppings like grilled steak or boiled eggs are just gravy.

Samyang Extra Hot Chicken Flavor Ramen Are you up for #FireNoodleChallenge? Join the leagues of people who’ve filmed themselves slurping these dangerously spicy noodles. There are multiple flavor options available, from carbonara to curry, and all of them equally fiery. Cover this with lots of mozzarella cheese to tone down the heat to the point where you might actually enjoy it.

Tseng Noodles Scallion With Sichuan Pepper Flavor This Taiwanese instant noodle is all about texture. Its curling, knife-cut-like strands are a perfect match for the sauce. There are many different flavors, besides this scallion one, such as black sesame and shallots. Depending on the sauce, the noodles textures vary. Think of this as gourmet-tier, since it costs slightly more than other noodles, but it’s totally worth the splurge.

Paldo Bibim Myun Cold Noodle The spicy, tangy, sweet sauce of these Korean noodles will wake up even the dullest of palates. Cook the noodles until they’re just al dente, or still a little firm, then rinse them under cold water to get rid of any residual starch and achieve peak bounce and chew. The sauce packet is an excellent salad dressing, too. Add some chopped cucumber and hard-boiled egg for a clutch midnight snack, or add some ice cubes for a cooling summer treat.

Mom’s Dry Noodle Sichuan Spicy The Taiwanese knife cut-style noodles cling to the oily, spicy sauce for maximum slurpability. Top with a fried egg or fried cubed tofu and you can almost pretend you’re at a restaurant.

James Park

Mom’s Dry Noodle has dried ribbon noodles which have ideal textures for the sauce

from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2z89lS1 https://ift.tt/2LC3sPt

A variety of instant noodles from different countries | James Park

How to mash-up, deconstruct, and altogether upgrade the versatile staple of dorm room dining

As a semi-professional noodle slurper and collector, I’ve eaten hundreds of noodles in my life, but I have a particular soft spot for one type, specifically: the instant kind. You know, those hard squiggly bricks of dried, fried noodles with accompanying seasoning packets that have long been the foundation of the American collegiate diet. Since the pandemic started, I’ve been showing off my impressive collection of instant noodles to my friends on FaceTime like a YouTube beauty guru flaunting their makeup stash.

I love instant noodles for many reasons: They have a nearly indefinite shelf life; they are an easy breakfast, snack, or — with the right bolstering — a full meal; and, they come in a panoply of shapes, textures, flavors, and colorful packaging styles. But while there is nothing wrong with eating instant noodles according to the instructions, it’s their versatility that’s made me a devoted fan. Here’s how to mash-up, deconstruct, and upgrade the dorm room staple.

1. Load up on protein

Yes, many instant noodles come with their own packets of dehydrated vegetable or meat flavoring, but they rarely provide much real taste and add zero in the way of texture. Supplementing your own additional proteins will do a lot to make your instant noodles more satisfying and nutrition-rich. Try simple items like ground meat, sausage, tofu, and leftover fried chicken — or my personal favorite ramen topping, pork char siu. Meat shortage got ya down? Just crack an egg. You can stir it right in to create an egg-drop soup effect, or poach the egg gently in the soup broth to enjoy breaking the creamy yolk.

James Park

Chicken-flavored ramen with garlicky sautéed kale, roasted chicken legs, and carrots.

2. Go big with toppings

Going nuts with the add-ons at ramen restaurants can mean spending $30 on a bowl of noodles (toppings normally cost between $1 and $3 each.) But at home, you can have as many toppings as the inventory of your fridge’s produce drawer allows: scallions, corn, mushrooms, kale, you name it. Not sure about what to do with all those weird greens in your CSA farm box? Add them to your instant noodles! Fact: There is no such thing as a lousy topping for instant noodles.

3. Deconstruct everything

Each element of the instant noodle package is a multi-purpose cooking superstar. The seasoning packets add a pop to stir-fried vegetables. Broken into bits, the uncooked noodles are an excellent crunchy topping for a salad or even another non-instant pasta dish. Do yourself a favor and add some ramen seasoning to mac and cheese, or how about using those instant noodles to make buns for an at-home ramen burger?

4. Switch up the liquid

To deepen the character of the soup, try cooking the noodles in vegetable or chicken broth instead of plain water. There are plenty of wilder recipes out there, including this one I’m skeptical of that uses milk, but homemade stock is a safe jumping off point.

5. Mash-up different styles

Mixing different instant noodle styles and seasoning packets is a culinary art form in itself, and can have big payoff. Jjapaguri (also called ram-don), the famous dish from the Oscar-winning movie Parasite, is actually just a hybrid of two different kinds of instant noodles — Neoguri and Jjappaghetti — and has become one of Korea’s national dishes. The magic comes from the mixing of Neguri’s spicy seafood powder with Jjappaghetti’s savory black bean powder, which ignites a lethal umami bomb. But jjapaguri is just the start. Try mixing Neoguri and curry noodles to create an exuberant, spicy curry broth. Combining super spicy noodles with something cheesy is also 100 percent never a bad idea.

James Park

Jjapaghetti goes well with fried egg

The Ones to Know

Here, then, are some of the best instant noodles to stock up on, categorized by whether or not they’re “brothy” (the noodle soup kind) or “saucy” (brothless noodles with a separate sauce).

BROTHY

MyKuali Penang White Curry Noodle If you love Penang curry, try adding this noodle to your cart. These wildly popular Malaysian instant noodles are considered some of the best in the world on this heavily opinionated ranking. Three whole flavor pouches — one of them is a paste — make for a deep, coconut-y taste and hearty portion size that you rarely get from instant noodles. Add toppings like fried tofu or prawns.

Neoguri, Spicy Seafood Udon Noodles Neoguri, a Korean word for raccoon dog (neither a raccoon nor a dog; discuss), has been my top choice for ramen since I started slurping noodles at the age of three. This beloved Korean instant noodle is known for two things: thick udon-like noodles and a spicy seafood broth with actual dried seafood. It’s fantastic with any fishy topping or add-ins.

Nongshim Shin Ramyun Noodle Soup Shin Ramyun might be the very first Korean instant noodle brand, as well as one of the easiest to find internationally: I still remember the exciting moment when I found Shin Ramyun in a random gas station in Alabama. It’s known for its spicy broth, and doubles as an excellent noodle for Korean ramen beginners. Top this with a slice of American cheese to tone down the spice and pump up the greatness.

Prima Taste Laksa Coconut Curry Lamian Noodles This Singaporean instant noodle inspired by traditional laksa has a paste sachet that can and should be used for stir-frying vegetables, too. The noodles are rounder and less wavy than others, and the white powder adds the signature creaminess.

Mama Noodles Thai cooking doesn’t shy away from acid, and neither do these Thai instant noodles, with just the right balance of acidic and salty flavors. The wavy noodles and the powdery seasonings make a great snack — though it may not be hearty enough to be a standalone meal. Beef it up with a hard-boiled egg and other vegetable toppings, like scallions.

Sapporo Ichiban Tokyo Chicken Momosan Ramen Think Japanese shoyu ramen, in instant form: salty, slightly smokey, and clean tasting. It’s great with plain old white-meat chicken breast — which is hard to say about anything, really.

Paldo Gomtang Oriental Style Noodles with Beef Soup Base Not all Korean instant noodles are spicy! This mild, creamy Korean noodle soup is inspired by gomtang, or beef bone broth. It has an intense beefiness and is excellent with hearty greens like cabbage or scallions. Add some ground beef to make it more filling.

Tseung noodles with black bean sauce

SAUCY

Nongshim, Jjapaghetti (Noodle Pasta with jjajang Sauce) “On Sundays, I’m the chef for Jjapaghetti” has been a Korean catchphrase for more than a decade. A combination of two dishes — jajangmyun (black bean noodles) and spaghetti— this saucy Korean instant noodle is also what spurred the ram-don trend after its crucial role in Parasite. The accompanying savory black bean sauce is all it really needs, though I highly recommend a luxe drizzle of truffle oil, too.

Indomie Mi Goreng Instant Stir Fry Noodles If you haven’t tried this Indonesian instant noodle, stop what you’re doing and fix that immediately. The package comes with a liquid seasoning mix of savory onion-flavored oil, sweet-spicy chili sauce, and sweet soy sauce, creating a salty-and-sweet coating for the wavy noodles. Any optional toppings like grilled steak or boiled eggs are just gravy.

Samyang Extra Hot Chicken Flavor Ramen Are you up for #FireNoodleChallenge? Join the leagues of people who’ve filmed themselves slurping these dangerously spicy noodles. There are multiple flavor options available, from carbonara to curry, and all of them equally fiery. Cover this with lots of mozzarella cheese to tone down the heat to the point where you might actually enjoy it.

Tseng Noodles Scallion With Sichuan Pepper Flavor This Taiwanese instant noodle is all about texture. Its curling, knife-cut-like strands are a perfect match for the sauce. There are many different flavors, besides this scallion one, such as black sesame and shallots. Depending on the sauce, the noodles textures vary. Think of this as gourmet-tier, since it costs slightly more than other noodles, but it’s totally worth the splurge.

Paldo Bibim Myun Cold Noodle The spicy, tangy, sweet sauce of these Korean noodles will wake up even the dullest of palates. Cook the noodles until they’re just al dente, or still a little firm, then rinse them under cold water to get rid of any residual starch and achieve peak bounce and chew. The sauce packet is an excellent salad dressing, too. Add some chopped cucumber and hard-boiled egg for a clutch midnight snack, or add some ice cubes for a cooling summer treat.

Mom’s Dry Noodle Sichuan Spicy The Taiwanese knife cut-style noodles cling to the oily, spicy sauce for maximum slurpability. Top with a fried egg or fried cubed tofu and you can almost pretend you’re at a restaurant.

James Park

Mom’s Dry Noodle has dried ribbon noodles which have ideal textures for the sauce

from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2z89lS1 via Blogger https://ift.tt/367Ubs6

[easyfoodnetwork]

A variety of instant noodles from different countries How to mash-up, deconstruct, and altogether upgrade the versatile staple of dorm room dining As a semi-professional noodle slurper and collector, I’ve eaten hundreds of noodles in my life, but I have a particular soft spot for one type, specifically: the instant kind. You know, those hard squiggly bricks of dried, fried noodles with accompanying seasoning packets that have long been the foundation of the American collegiate diet. Since the pandemic started, I’ve been showing off my impressive collection of instant noodles to my friends on FaceTime like a YouTube beauty guru flaunting their makeup stash. I love instant noodles for many reasons: They have a nearly indefinite shelf life; they are an easy breakfast, snack, or — with the right bolstering — a full meal; and, they come in a panoply of shapes, textures, flavors, and colorful packaging styles. But while there is nothing wrong with eating instant noodles according to the instructions, it’s their versatility that’s made me a devoted fan. Here’s how to mash-up, deconstruct, and upgrade the dorm room staple. 1. Load up on protein Yes, many instant noodles come with their own packets of dehydrated vegetable or meat flavoring, but they rarely provide much real taste and add zero in the way of texture. Supplementing your own additional proteins will do a lot to make your instant noodles more satisfying and nutrition-rich. Try simple items like ground meat, sausage, tofu, and leftover fried chicken — or my personal favorite ramen topping, pork char siu. Meat shortage got ya down? Just crack an egg. You can stir it right in to create an egg-drop soup effect, or poach the egg gently in the soup broth to enjoy breaking the creamy yolk. Chicken-flavored ramen with garlicky sautéed kale, roasted chicken legs, and carrots. 2. Go big with toppings Going nuts with the add-ons at ramen restaurants can mean spending $30 on a bowl of noodles (toppings normally cost between $1 and $3 each.) But at home, you can have as many toppings as the inventory of your fridge’s produce drawer allows: scallions, corn, mushrooms, kale, you name it. Not sure about what to do with all those weird greens in your CSA farm box? Add them to your instant noodles! Fact: There is no such thing as a lousy topping for instant noodles. 3. Deconstruct everything Each element of the instant noodle package is a multi-purpose cooking superstar. The seasoning packets add a pop to stir-fried vegetables. Broken into bits, the uncooked noodles are an excellent crunchy topping for a salad or even another non-instant pasta dish. Do yourself a favor and add some ramen seasoning to mac and cheese, or how about using those instant noodles to make buns for an at-home ramen burger? 4. Switch up the liquid To deepen the character of the soup, try cooking the noodles in vegetable or chicken broth instead of plain water. There are plenty of wilder recipes out there, including this one I’m skeptical of that uses milk, but homemade stock is a safe jumping off point. 5. Mash-up different styles Mixing different instant noodle styles and seasoning packets is a culinary art form in itself, and can have big payoff. Jjapaguri (also called ram-don), the famous dish from the Oscar-winning movie Parasite, is actually just a hybrid of two different kinds of instant noodles — Neoguri and Jjappaghetti — and has become one of Korea’s national dishes. The magic comes from the mixing of Neguri’s spicy seafood powder with Jjappaghetti’s savory black bean powder, which ignites a lethal umami bomb. But jjapaguri is just the start. Try mixing Neoguri and curry noodles to create an exuberant, spicy curry broth. Combining super spicy noodles with something cheesy is also 100 percent never a bad idea. Jjapaghetti goes well with fried egg The Ones to Know Here, then, are some of the best instant noodles to stock up on, categorized by whether or not they’re “brothy” (the noodle soup kind) or “saucy” (brothless noodles with a separate sauce). BROTHY MyKuali Penang White Curry Noodle If you love Penang curry, try adding this noodle to your cart. These wildly popular Malaysian instant noodles are considered some of the best in the world on this heavily opinionated ranking. Three whole flavor pouches — one of them is a paste — make for a deep, coconut-y taste and hearty portion size that you rarely get from instant noodles. Add toppings like fried tofu or prawns. Neoguri, Spicy Seafood Udon Noodles Neoguri, a Korean word for raccoon dog (neither a raccoon nor a dog; discuss), has been my top choice for ramen since I started slurping noodles at the age of three. This beloved Korean instant noodle is known for two things: thick udon-like noodles and a spicy seafood broth with actual dried seafood. It’s fantastic with any fishy topping or add-ins. Nongshim Shin Ramyun Noodle Soup Shin Ramyun might be the very first Korean instant noodle brand, as well as one of the easiest to find internationally: I still remember the exciting moment when I found Shin Ramyun in a random gas station in Alabama. It’s known for its spicy broth, and doubles as an excellent noodle for Korean ramen beginners. Top this with a slice of American cheese to tone down the spice and pump up the greatness. Prima Taste Laksa Coconut Curry Lamian Noodles This Singaporean instant noodle inspired by traditional laksa has a paste sachet that can and should be used for stir-frying vegetables, too. The noodles are rounder and less wavy than others, and the white powder adds the signature creaminess. Mama Noodles Thai cooking doesn’t shy away from acid, and neither do these Thai instant noodles, with just the right balance of acidic and salty flavors. The wavy noodles and the powdery seasonings make a great snack — though it may not be hearty enough to be a standalone meal. Beef it up with a hard-boiled egg and other vegetable toppings, like scallions. Sapporo Ichiban Tokyo Chicken Momosan Ramen Think Japanese shoyu ramen, in instant form: salty, slightly smokey, and clean tasting. It’s great with plain old white-meat chicken breast — which is hard to say about anything, really. Paldo Gomtang Oriental Style Noodles with Beef Soup Base Not all Korean instant noodles are spicy! This mild, creamy Korean noodle soup is inspired by gomtang, or beef bone broth. It has an intense beefiness and is excellent with hearty greens like cabbage or scallions. Add some ground beef to make it more filling. Tseng noodles with black sesame sauce SAUCY Nongshim, Jjapaghetti (Noodle Pasta with jjajang Sauce) “On Sundays, I’m the chef for Jjapaghetti” has been a Korean catchphrase for more than a decade. A combination of two dishes — jajangmyun (black bean noodles) and spaghetti— this saucy Korean instant noodle is also what spurred the ram-don trend after its crucial role in Parasite. The accompanying savory black bean sauce is all it really needs, though I highly recommend a luxe drizzle of truffle oil, too. Indomie Mi Goreng Instant Stir Fry Noodles If you haven’t tried this Indonesian instant noodle, stop what you’re doing and fix that immediately. The package comes with a liquid seasoning mix of savory onion-flavored oil, sweet-spicy chili sauce, and sweet soy sauce, creating a salty-and-sweet coating for the wavy noodles. Any optional toppings like grilled steak or boiled eggs are just gravy. Samyang Extra Hot Chicken Flavor Ramen Are you up for #FireNoodleChallenge? Join the leagues of people who’ve filmed themselves slurping these dangerously spicy noodles. There are multiple flavor options available, from carbonara to curry, and all of them equally fiery. Cover this with lots of mozzarella cheese to tone down the heat to the point where you might actually enjoy it. Tseng Noodles Scallion With Sichuan Pepper Flavor This Taiwanese instant noodle is all about texture. Its curling, knife-cut-like strands are a perfect match for the sauce. There are many different flavors, besides this scallion one, such as black sesame and shallots. Depending on the sauce, the noodles textures vary. Think of this as gourmet-tier, since it costs slightly more than other noodles, but it’s totally worth the splurge. Paldo Bibim Myun Cold Noodle The spicy, tangy, sweet sauce of these Korean noodles will wake up even the dullest of palates. Cook the noodles until they’re just al dente, or still a little firm, then rinse them under cold water to get rid of any residual starch and achieve peak bounce and chew. The sauce packet is an excellent salad dressing, too. Add some chopped cucumber and hard-boiled egg for a clutch midnight snack, or add some ice cubes for a cooling summer treat. Mom’s Dry Noodle Sichuan Spicy The Taiwanese knife cut-style noodles cling to the oily, spicy sauce for maximum slurpability. Top with a fried egg or fried cubed tofu and you can almost pretend you’re at a restaurant. Mom’s Dry Noodle has dried ribbon noodles which have ideal textures for the sauce from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2NkSTkS

http://easyfoodnetwork.blogspot.com/2020/06/the-ultimate-guide-to-instant-noodles.html

[easyfoodnetwork]

A variety of instant noodles from different countries | James Park How to mash-up, deconstruct, and altogether upgrade the versatile staple of dorm room dining As a semi-professional noodle slurper and collector, I’ve eaten hundreds of noodles in my life, but I have a particular soft spot for one type, specifically: the instant kind. You know, those hard squiggly bricks of dried, fried noodles with accompanying seasoning packets that have long been the foundation of the American collegiate diet. Since the pandemic started, I’ve been showing off my impressive collection of instant noodles to my friends on FaceTime like a YouTube beauty guru flaunting their makeup stash. I love instant noodles for many reasons: They have a nearly indefinite shelf life; they are an easy breakfast, snack, or — with the right bolstering — a full meal; and, they come in a panoply of shapes, textures, flavors, and colorful packaging styles. But while there is nothing wrong with eating instant noodles according to the instructions, it’s their versatility that’s made me a devoted fan. Here’s how to mash-up, deconstruct, and upgrade the dorm room staple. 1. Load up on protein Yes, many instant noodles come with their own packets of dehydrated vegetable or meat flavoring, but they rarely provide much real taste and add zero in the way of texture. Supplementing your own additional proteins will do a lot to make your instant noodles more satisfying and nutrition-rich. Try simple items like ground meat, sausage, tofu, and leftover fried chicken — or my personal favorite ramen topping, pork char siu. Meat shortage got ya down? Just crack an egg. You can stir it right in to create an egg-drop soup effect, or poach the egg gently in the soup broth to enjoy breaking the creamy yolk. James Park Chicken-flavored ramen with garlicky sautéed kale, roasted chicken legs, and carrots. 2. Go big with toppings Going nuts with the add-ons at ramen restaurants can mean spending $30 on a bowl of noodles (toppings normally cost between $1 and $3 each.) But at home, you can have as many toppings as the inventory of your fridge’s produce drawer allows: scallions, corn, mushrooms, kale, you name it. Not sure about what to do with all those weird greens in your CSA farm box? Add them to your instant noodles! Fact: There is no such thing as a lousy topping for instant noodles. 3. Deconstruct everything Each element of the instant noodle package is a multi-purpose cooking superstar. The seasoning packets add a pop to stir-fried vegetables. Broken into bits, the uncooked noodles are an excellent crunchy topping for a salad or even another non-instant pasta dish. Do yourself a favor and add some ramen seasoning to mac and cheese, or how about using those instant noodles to make buns for an at-home ramen burger? 4. Switch up the liquid To deepen the character of the soup, try cooking the noodles in vegetable or chicken broth instead of plain water. There are plenty of wilder recipes out there, including this one I’m skeptical of that uses milk, but homemade stock is a safe jumping off point. 5. Mash-up different styles Mixing different instant noodle styles and seasoning packets is a culinary art form in itself, and can have big payoff. Jjapaguri (also called ram-don), the famous dish from the Oscar-winning movie Parasite, is actually just a hybrid of two different kinds of instant noodles — Neoguri and Jjappaghetti — and has become one of Korea’s national dishes. The magic comes from the mixing of Neguri’s spicy seafood powder with Jjappaghetti’s savory black bean powder, which ignites a lethal umami bomb. But jjapaguri is just the start. Try mixing Neoguri and curry noodles to create an exuberant, spicy curry broth. Combining super spicy noodles with something cheesy is also 100 percent never a bad idea. James Park Jjapaghetti goes well with fried egg The Ones to Know Here, then, are some of the best instant noodles to stock up on, categorized by whether or not they’re “brothy” (the noodle soup kind) or “saucy” (brothless noodles with a separate sauce). BROTHY MyKuali Penang White Curry Noodle If you love Penang curry, try adding this noodle to your cart. These wildly popular Malaysian instant noodles are considered some of the best in the world on this heavily opinionated ranking. Three whole flavor pouches — one of them is a paste — make for a deep, coconut-y taste and hearty portion size that you rarely get from instant noodles. Add toppings like fried tofu or prawns. Neoguri, Spicy Seafood Udon Noodles Neoguri, a Korean word for raccoon dog (neither a raccoon nor a dog; discuss), has been my top choice for ramen since I started slurping noodles at the age of three. This beloved Korean instant noodle is known for two things: thick udon-like noodles and a spicy seafood broth with actual dried seafood. It’s fantastic with any fishy topping or add-ins. Nongshim Shin Ramyun Noodle Soup Shin Ramyun might be the very first Korean instant noodle brand, as well as one of the easiest to find internationally: I still remember the exciting moment when I found Shin Ramyun in a random gas station in Alabama. It’s known for its spicy broth, and doubles as an excellent noodle for Korean ramen beginners. Top this with a slice of American cheese to tone down the spice and pump up the greatness. Prima Taste Laksa Coconut Curry Lamian Noodles This Singaporean instant noodle inspired by traditional laksa has a paste sachet that can and should be used for stir-frying vegetables, too. The noodles are rounder and less wavy than others, and the white powder adds the signature creaminess. Mama Noodles Thai cooking doesn’t shy away from acid, and neither do these Thai instant noodles, with just the right balance of acidic and salty flavors. The wavy noodles and the powdery seasonings make a great snack — though it may not be hearty enough to be a standalone meal. Beef it up with a hard-boiled egg and other vegetable toppings, like scallions. Sapporo Ichiban Tokyo Chicken Momosan Ramen Think Japanese shoyu ramen, in instant form: salty, slightly smokey, and clean tasting. It’s great with plain old white-meat chicken breast — which is hard to say about anything, really. Paldo Gomtang Oriental Style Noodles with Beef Soup Base Not all Korean instant noodles are spicy! This mild, creamy Korean noodle soup is inspired by gomtang, or beef bone broth. It has an intense beefiness and is excellent with hearty greens like cabbage or scallions. Add some ground beef to make it more filling. Tseung noodles with black bean sauce SAUCY Nongshim, Jjapaghetti (Noodle Pasta with jjajang Sauce) “On Sundays, I’m the chef for Jjapaghetti” has been a Korean catchphrase for more than a decade. A combination of two dishes — jajangmyun (black bean noodles) and spaghetti— this saucy Korean instant noodle is also what spurred the ram-don trend after its crucial role in Parasite. The accompanying savory black bean sauce is all it really needs, though I highly recommend a luxe drizzle of truffle oil, too. Indomie Mi Goreng Instant Stir Fry Noodles If you haven’t tried this Indonesian instant noodle, stop what you’re doing and fix that immediately. The package comes with a liquid seasoning mix of savory onion-flavored oil, sweet-spicy chili sauce, and sweet soy sauce, creating a salty-and-sweet coating for the wavy noodles. Any optional toppings like grilled steak or boiled eggs are just gravy. Samyang Extra Hot Chicken Flavor Ramen Are you up for #FireNoodleChallenge? Join the leagues of people who’ve filmed themselves slurping these dangerously spicy noodles. There are multiple flavor options available, from carbonara to curry, and all of them equally fiery. Cover this with lots of mozzarella cheese to tone down the heat to the point where you might actually enjoy it. Tseng Noodles Scallion With Sichuan Pepper Flavor This Taiwanese instant noodle is all about texture. Its curling, knife-cut-like strands are a perfect match for the sauce. There are many different flavors, besides this scallion one, such as black sesame and shallots. Depending on the sauce, the noodles textures vary. Think of this as gourmet-tier, since it costs slightly more than other noodles, but it’s totally worth the splurge. Paldo Bibim Myun Cold Noodle The spicy, tangy, sweet sauce of these Korean noodles will wake up even the dullest of palates. Cook the noodles until they’re just al dente, or still a little firm, then rinse them under cold water to get rid of any residual starch and achieve peak bounce and chew. The sauce packet is an excellent salad dressing, too. Add some chopped cucumber and hard-boiled egg for a clutch midnight snack, or add some ice cubes for a cooling summer treat. Mom’s Dry Noodle Sichuan Spicy The Taiwanese knife cut-style noodles cling to the oily, spicy sauce for maximum slurpability. Top with a fried egg or fried cubed tofu and you can almost pretend you’re at a restaurant. James Park Mom’s Dry Noodle has dried ribbon noodles which have ideal textures for the sauce from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2z89lS1

http://easyfoodnetwork.blogspot.com/2020/05/the-ultimate-guide-to-instant-noodles.html