#WHICH HAD SO MUCH FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST VIBE

[blitzbuckz]

I was in a mission to pick up my FIRST FANCY ASS FRIDGE

I HAD ONE JOB TODAY

but... ended up with a Colossal Reindeer instead

LISTEN I HAD TO GET HIM MY HORN BRETHREN

[letters-to-rosie]

for the fic writers ask (a bit late): 2, 3, 8, 9 and 41 please

it's not too late I like to talk lol

and I talked a lot so buckle in

2. Go to your AO3 “Works” page, to the sidebar with all the filters, and click the drop-down arrow for “Additional Tags.” What are your top 3-5 most used tags? Do you think they accurately represent your writing habits?

my top 3 are "alternate universe - modern setting" (8/10), "alternate universe - college/university" (5/10), and "not beta read" (5/10, which is funny because 10/10 are not beta read lol)

and yeah, I can't say they don't represent me. when I was on ff.net I used a beta (my mom lmao) but now my grasp of English grammar is much better. I still miss stuff all the time (I found a word use error rereading something I'd published like a year and a half prior and wanted to scream lol), but it is what it is. even though I have professional editing credentials, it's really hard to edit your own stuff because your brain still fills in what it expects to see

re: modern setting and college setting, I started off my account publishing a couple college AU Fullmetal Alchemist one-shots; the only other college fic I had was my second prompt fill for the Arcane timebomb secret santa, where the prompt was to write in a modern setting. so that's all the college fics and 5/8 of the modern setting. another modern one is high school, since when I finished Arcane I felt a deep need to write Ekko in a high school setting because rarely had I felt so compelled by a single character. and the last two are the revolution universe, which is a funny story

idk how much I've mentioned this before, but the reason revolution is a modern setting is because I wanted to see if I could make an Ekko/Jinx roleswap work without the help of any of the story's magical elements. to restrict myself, I changed the setting. from there, developing modern Piltover/Zaun was just really fun. I took a lot of cues from the aforementioned high school setting fic I wrote and turned them up to 11. it has been and still is a fun ride, so I'm not mad about that choice at all

3. What are some tropes or details that you think are very characteristic of your fics?

hmmmmmmm lol well line breaks! I like to make detailed little line breaks. some show up better on one platform than another (for example, the revolution telephone line breaks look WAY better on desktop imo), but I think they are cute

in terms of more trope-related things, I actually had a hard time for a moment. I went and looked at some fics of mine to try and find an answer

humor is one, for sure. big believer in laughing even on the worst day of your life. I think that's how I survived mine, and I think the characters I write about would be the same, finding something absurd or funny even when things are really bad

another one, I think, is attention to the mundane. I'm not a super detailed writer; purple prose isn't really my personal style. but I like writing about boring things. little things, you know?

the last one I'll bring up is setup and payoff. that's one of my personal favorite writing devices. I really enjoy putting the pieces in place and watching it all come together is always really satisfying. especially when combined with a focus on the mundane. like I have one story where Ekko's wearing a tie, and it matters.

8. What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)?

hmmmmm well I don't know if there are any I'd want to see just adapted straight into a fic, or nothing comes to mind directly. or maybe it's that the songs I am thinking of are more vibes than plot? well anyway, Willow's Symptom of Life is one I really like lately, as well as Sampha and Little Simz's Satellite Business 2.0, Kenny Mason's Firestarter (or Metal Wings tbh, or like the entirety of Angelic Hoodrat), and Isaiah Rashad's Headshots (4 Da Locals)

9. How do you find new fic to read?

scroll on a tag, or someone I know writes something and I go read it, and sometimes recs

41. Link a fic that made you think, “Wow, I want to write like that.”

honestly, I just want to write like myself, but the goal is to shoutout other people so I picked one from each other the fandoms I've read the most of on ao3

for Fullmetal, Swallows on the Beam is a long-time fave; the detail of the worldbuilding is really great, and I love the amount of thought put into a setting that isn't even seen in the canon material. the prose is just really lovely too. the author has done such an incredible job, and I need to go through and actually comment on all the chapters someday, but I have so much to say that I know it'll take me forever lol. but like how can a scene of a character touching another character's earring make me lose my shit? that is the magic of this fic lol. one of the most romantic things I have ever read

for Hunter x Hunter, I really love a thousand miles wandering; the Silk Road setting is just so unique! the prose is great, character work is great, setting is worked into the story in a great way. all feels like generic praise, but the whole thing is just so well-rounded in its excellence

for Arcane, my favorite has always been The Revolution Will Not Be Televised; just has such an infectious energy. it's fun, funny, and it takes this fantasy setting and makes it feel very real, which in turn helps the characters feel even more real than they do in the show, in some ways

[kurisus]

So you love noragami we all love it any reading recs of things like it? Or that you just like?

YES!!!!!

So I have to preface this by saying there's nothing quite like Noragami. And there is nothing wrong with rereading Noragami over and over. But I still have a lot of recs that give Vibes or in general make me Feel Emotions, so here's a non-exhaustive list.

Anime/Manga:

Fruits Basket by Natsuki Takaya. I've been saying for years that Fruits Basket is Noragami if it was a shoujo. It deals with the same cycles of abuse and an outsider who tries to break them with pure compassion that Noragami does, although it's much more of a drama than a fantasy. Just watch it and think of Yato as the Zodiac cat. I rest my case.

Fullmetal Alchemist (Fullmetal Alchemist) by Hiromu Arakawa. Chances are you've read or seen this already but it's objectively a masterpiece by any standard you care to use. Whether you like shounen fights, deeply emotional interpersonal relationships, political dramas about war and revolution, fantasy based on Greek myth, or anything else, FMA balances them all perfectly (another thing it has in common with Noragami). I love it so much.

Code Geass. This may seem like a wildcard pick but I rewatched Code Geass a few years ago and realized there are a lot of shared elements (like, Suzaku and Kazuma are the same guy). I may be delusional but it's hands down one of the most insane anime I've ever seen, in a good way. Like how FMA and Noragami balance a bunch of genres, Code Geass is a mecha action anime, a school slice of life, a political drama, and a Shakespearean tragedy all at the same time.

Chainsaw Man by Tatsuki Fujimoto. Again this may be one you're familiar with, but after I caught up on Part 1 of the manga I was so deeply wounded I had to start thinking about Noragami again (which is a worse idea). Chainsaw Man is much more of a Shounen™ than Noragami is, and I still maintain that the saddest parts of Chainsaw Man are like happier Noragami chapters, but it's a very good story and one that also has a lonely, cast-out protagonist who craves human affection but has no idea how to get it (and when he does, it's ripped away from him).

Durarara by Ryohgo Narita. In the anime adaptation, pretty much the entire voice cast is shared between it and Noragami (in the Japanese dub). It is a very weird story about a lot of weird people who are competing to be The Most Normal Person In Ikebukuro, a task which they all fail at spectacularly. It doesn't have much in common with Noragami aside from the voice cast but I love it so I recommend giving it a watch (or reading the light novels if you're feeling adventurous).

Link Click. This is a donghua (Chinese anime) about time travel and it steadily drives me more insane the longer I think about it. The three main characters have such lovely relationships with each other and the emotions go OUCH every time. It's a little harder to pinpoint the connection with Noragami here, but it is a story about the things people will do for love. The writing is crazy good especially considering it's not based on a novel or comic; I haven't seen an anime-original with writing this good since Code Geass.

Not a specific anime but the other week I thought about, what if Yuki Kajiura had been the composer for Noragami? Her style suits its aesthetic so well so now whenever I watch something she wrote for, I yearn.

Books:

The Locked Tomb by Tamsyn Muir. If you've looked at my blog at all in the last 2 years you'll know I am very sane over this book series. I actually made a Venn diagram comparing it to Noragami a while back, but the gist of it is that they deal with a lot of similar themes such as love, death, and the curse of immortality. It also has soooo many messy and complicated relationships and twists that leave your jaw on the floor. You can also use the worldbuilding to put your blorbos into and it's very fun for giving yourself Thoughts. For example I've done it both ways by putting the Noragami characters into the TLT universe and the TLT characters into the Noragami universe. Both are very painful.

Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint by Sing-shong. I'm not done reading this yet (about 2/3 through), but the further I get the more I realize it's about all kinds of love, the same way Noragami is. The narrator forms a "party" of people in the apocalypse, and they go through life-or-death scenarios together, and the way they grow to love and care for each other is so natural and feels so earned whenever it pays off. If you want romantic relationships, queerplatonic relationships, parent/child relationships, or any other type of relationship, ORV has it. There is also a webtoon adaptation but I'm reading the novel because it's completed; the webtoon will take many more years to get there.

Miscellaneous:

The Adventure Zone: Balance. This is a DND real-play podcast and it doesn't really have anything in common with Noragami but, like Noragami, it made me feel every possible human emotion, so I recommend it. It has a slow start but it grows into something so beautiful and creative and by the end of it I was sobbing in my car. Listen to it if you can, or at least listen to the music (it gets music later on and all of it is soooo good).

Okami. This is a video game heavily inspired by Legend of Zelda and much like Noragami it's a retelling of Japanese mythology, so the storyline will def have some familiar elements. I recommend playing it for yourself (it's available on Steam for PC and pretty much every other platform you can name), but a playthrough would be good too. It's nearly 20 years old and has withstood the test of time because the creators decided to make it look like a classic Japanese painting come to life, and the gameplay involves drawing, so it's very artsy and fun (although the controls are really weird).

Thanks for the ask! Hopefully you found something new, and I'll be sure to share if I find anything new to add to this list because I am always on the prowl for Noragami-adjacent things ❤

[thedustyleaves]

As a few people have mentioned your art has a lot of dynamic style and expression. But I also think there's something very- comic, about it.

Like, it's difficult to describe, but I kinda look at your work and go "Now this person knows what a good layout is", "They know their way around a comic page". You definitely have all the skills for it.

It's a very specific vibe that I can't quite name off the top of my head, but your style feels very inspired by the kind of comics I read when I was younger, even though it also feels completely new.

Tha's so cool, aaah man, thank you so much that's so awesome to hear! I grew up reading and watching a bunch of shounen manga and anime's, and I especially loved (and still love) One Piece and FullMetal Alchemist. I remember when I was like 13, as soon as I got my pay-check for delivering newspapers, I went to my local bookstore and bought one new One Piece volume from Carlsen Manga. Then I'd buy a coke and something from the baker and sit at home and just read it through, over and over again, until I could buy the next volume the following month haha.

Both One Piece and FMA were (and still are) huge sources of inspiration once I finally decided to give Bellum Pulchrum a go, in particular how Oda very sparingly uses screentones to separate foregrounds from backgrounds etc. Every time I get stuck, I'll read a few chapters to get into that very specific nostalgic feeling they convey, and start thumbnailing again.

Also, finally starting my comic certainly improved my illustrative work as well, it made me more confident and faster with my line-work, and I dared to actually make illustrations with more silly faces and extreme poses, rather than keeping everything "pretty" - which was a constraint I had put on myself in the past.

[fandom-trash-xl]

EPISODE 3: DAIMA (Yes, that's the actual episode title)

Jaka-Jaan's already stuck in my head, that's a sure sign of a banger. Anyway, onto episode 3!

This episode using the series recap intro from the first episode totally didn't scare me for a second. If this is going to become a regular thing like Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood's alchemy speech, we might be seeing Frieza a lot more this season (sure, the same shot but... yeah).

We're off to Demon Realm via the giant fish-like portal guardian, Warp-Sama, and Goku nearly blows the whole mission by being himself- I've noticed he's a little more childish. I don't think it's "Dragon Ball Super Brain Damage" bad but maybe because he's in a kid body again, he's taking the time to be a bit more silly and unfiltered.... unless the shrink also made them a little more immature.

The Warp-Samas apparently need an approved pin number to access and Shin can't use his mind link quick enough to tell Kibito- that'll be an uh oh later. And we're also hoping that Kibito will have the little ear illusion magic for Vegeta and Bulma or that'll be a second uh oh.

So, there's three Demon Worlds within the Demon Realm, basically in number hierarchy. Glorio's from the lowest, the third, but does some work in the first. "What kind of work?" (suspicious pause) "...This and that."

If he turns out to be an assassin or something, OH I am EXTRA buying his Funko Pop (or whatever easily accessible/affordable merch comes out first)! At the hotel, the fact that he had a gun seemed to be a tip off for the manager, so I wouldn't be surprised. I enjoy Glorio's vibes regardless.

We've got so many little worldbuild bits- the tunnel between worlds being closed off, gases from the volcanoes making the air heavy and hard to move fast in, the doom river that causes instant death... The fact that pretty much anything you could design as an OC or fan-creature here would fit in. And this is just the third world- as I typed that I realized how that sounds and oh this is going to be a Demon Realm class thing isn't it?

There's a statue left of Dabura that seems worse for wear- either because of just how long he was in power or the stone itself is sensing there's a new king in charge.

Apparently, Shin (and presumably the other Kais) is what's known as a Glind, so we've got new species classifications to work with! ...Are we retconning the magic life fruit origin thing or are we eventually going to come to that tree.

And we have to remember Toriyama's roots in gag manga by slipping in a fart joke

Of course, Goku's still hungry so they stop for some good old fashioned Demon Realm hamburgers- is it weird that after awhile they started looking really tasty actually?

"What meat is this?" "Don't ask." Oh. That definitely means it was a sapient at one point, doesn't it? Maybe that's what they do with all the rogue round-ears? There does seem to be some clear hostility, given they're very quick to start a bar fight- which Goku quickly steps into because you don't come between him and his hamburgers.

After a peaceful night's sleep, they wake up to find that the bar thugs stole Glorio's plane! (checks my GT notes because I'm sure I've seen this before)

Trying to predict what's coming next... From the previews, we might be getting lore on the Tagamis and I have a feeling that we might be meeting Panzy soon. Part of me's kind of hoping we get intermittent cut-ins to how it's going back on Earth.

Also, how I missed the expressive little commercial break in-between scenes! Love them!

EPISODES WITHOUT KNOWING HANVI'S WHEREABOUTS: 3

[felixcloud6288]

Fullmetal Alchemist Chapter 83

I missed Lin so much.

We finally have the name of the lion chimera. He's Heinkel.

Y'know, Lin has effectively gotten what he wants on his journey and the only thing left is to either wrest control from Greed or convince him to go back to Xing. Lin has no personal reason to tell Ed about Father's plan.

So yeah, Lin really is Ed's friend and wants to help him out.

The Homunculi like to go on about their pride and superiority to humans, but what they have is less pride and more like ego. They all mindlessly follow the orders of their "loving" father who has some grand ambition for himself and never once question what they do. And they continuously look down on people calling them weak, powerless, foolish, etc. Meanwhile, they have no actual ambitions or achievements to call their own. They just have their empty egos.

And I think Greed knows that. He is ambition made manifest and he cannot tolerate being bound to someone else's will.

But another thing the Homunculi lack is camaraderie. They exist only for Father's purpose and there is no true love between them. Ed gave him an unconditional offer to be his ally, and Greed didn't know how to process that. And then he turned it down because of his Homunculus ego.

Greed, you feel empty because you've actually experienced true friendship and had it all taken away.

No but seriously, why do Darius and Heinkel follow Ed around?

Olivier Mira Armstrong is showing us her Armstrong heritage, complete with the Armstrong sparkles.

This is the most Armstrong she's ever been. I suppose being around her family will do that. The only thing missing is she never mentioned her skills which were passed down the Armstrong line for generations.

We have the first main chapter appearance of PHILIP GARGANTOS ARMSTRONG, Mrs. Armstrong, and Catherine Elle Armstrong. And you can just feel the sheer Armstrong vibe in the room.

Olivier Mira Armstrong and Alex Louis Armstrong's fight is one of those moments that you need to watch in the anime. In the manga, we just hear all the fighting while the rest of the family packs their things to go on a vacation. In the anime, we actually see miscellaneous background events while the shot is still focused on the family packing up and leaving.

When Alex asked Olivier if she sent the family away so they couldn't be used as hostages, she just smiled and told him to get out. It kind of implies she was doing it for her own sake, but I'd say she did it for Alex's sake.

Olivier is the kind of person who is willing to act even if it would put her family in danger. But Alex is not. By sending the family away, she's telling him "When the time comes, you can do what you think is right without worry."

And now let's check the information chain. Hohenheim knows when the Promised Day is and he told Alphonse. Al then called Izumi's store and passed the message to Mason. Then Sig called Mason to get the information and they went to Briggs to pass the message to Miles and Buccaneer. Falman then passed the information over to Graman who gave Rebecca Katarina leave to go to Central and visit Hawkeye and Sergeant Major Black Hayate. Rebecca passes the message to Hawkeye, who hides it in a pack of cigarettes she gives Havoc, who then gives it to Roy.

The only major outlier to that information chain is Izumi and Sig. It feels like wild happenstance that they would happen to be traveling north and Sig just happened to call the shop and got the message from Al. Also, Al is not privy to the North-East alliance against Central.

I guess if I were to headcanon-conspiracy theory a guess, Izumi and Sig have allied with Hohenheim after meeting with him again. They may have headed North to check for signs of the underground tunnel there similar to how Hohenheim went to Reole to check for it there. And Hohenheim was planning to inform Izumi about the Promised day after he'd gotten confirmation.

Then Hohenheim told Al about Izumi's involvement and Al added that she should seek out Miles and Buccaneer to give them the info as well. Al knows Briggs is on their side. The fact that the East HQ is allied with them as well is just an unexpected bonus.

Meanwhile, Ed found out from a direct source. Maybe he'll try and contact Roy about it only to find out the Colonel already knows. Roy is surprisingly competent at gathering intel.

Quick note: Rebecca appears in the title art for chapter 53. She's on the photo in the bottom-left corner, just hidden under the chapter title.

And I guess Black Hayate is neutered.

And y'know what? I had thought Roy's team were the ones who came up with all these secret code systems to share information. But after seeing this insane display of covert information sharing, I'm going to guess they were all trained by Graman. He's known ever since Raven approached him that Central has been up to something so he's probably been training every person he can trust in the art of espionage.

back

[buffintruder]

20 questions for 20 writers!

@aromantic-enjolras tagged me, thank you for thinking of me!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

....91. Somehow

2. What��s your total AO3 word count?

938,024. I'm trying to get it past a million but I haven't been writing much recently so might be another year or two

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I'm a big 'write a bit of many different things' kind of person, but currently Ace Attorney and Kamen Rider (mostly Kamen Rider Blade)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1) what if the real steel samurai fandom was the friends we made along the way (over twice as much kudos as #2 on this list) (ace attorney)

2) Reunion (the untamed)

3) Wanting to Be Wanted (fullmetal alchemist)

4) Klavier's No Good Very Bad Year (ace attorney, sequel to #1 on this list)

5) To Turn the World Upside Down (the only one on this list i actually think is top 5 material, probably the best fic i've ever written) (ace attorney)

5. Do you respond to comments?

In general, it just might take me awhile and there have been a couple comments I took so long getting back to that I decided to just give up on it

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

So I've written a lot of Les Mis canon-compliant fic that ends with the main character's death. But most of those, I feel like the tone I was going for was more "defiant" or "hopeful" despite the death. So I'm going to go with Trust Fall (kamen rider blade) because the ending is sort of more "horrified, betrayed, despair". (no character death, but the canon ending is sort of 'fate worse than death' which this fic ends on)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This is also hard because I have written so many fics and most of them have relatively happy endings. I was going to try and go by 'which story has a main character whose situation has improved the most by the end' but i think i lost track a bit and skipped over older fics i didn't remember well

Anyway, going purely off of vibe, I'm going to say Angus McDonald and the Case of the Soul Stealer (the adventure zone)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not never, but I think only a couple of times in my 10 years of posting fanfic, if I did the math right

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Well. I have not posted any smut and I currently have 2 separate wips that are supposed to be smut, however, they both stop exactly when the sex starts so. I'm trying but I don't think I can say I have yet lol

(it took me a few days to actually finish this question thing, and in the intervening time, i did write maybe like 300 words of what may or may not be considered actually the smut part. we'll see.)

10. Do you write crossovers?

I love crossovers but I think I've only written a handful (more if you count things that are in the same franchise but of different characters and different settings, ie two Kamen Rider series or Ace Attorney and the prequel). I want to write a KR Blade Star Trek ds9 crossover but we'll see if that ever happens

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I think way back in the days of ffn, someone translated a Doctor Who/Supernatural fic into Russian

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yep, with @arofili !

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

That's a great question and I could not tell you the answer to that. I have the most fics written tagged as Phoenix/Edgeworth though

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Many of them :(((

I have a ghost hunting youtuber au of Kamen Rider W that explores Philip and Wakana's sibling relationship more that I highly doubt will actually get done because I don't have enough plot for it

16. What are your writing strengths?

Maybe dialogue? I'm not sure. I think I write good stories, I just don't know what about them is best. Maybe character development?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Action scenes. I get stuck on fighting and kissing/sex scenes for very similar reasons

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I'm pro and do it sometimes in my own fic. I think there are good ways to do it and not as good ways to do it (for example, to steal what aromantic-enjolras said, don't have characters say a few words in French if they're supposed to have been speaking French the whole time)

My own preference lies to keeping things in the language of the main story (so English for my fics) and translating the dialogue into that language if there's a lot of it. But if it's just a line or two, or if the characters are switching between languages, or if I want it for flavor, or the pov character doesn't understand the language being spoken, etc, I might use the other language. Honestly it depends on what language too, I'm way more likely to put Japanese in a fic (a language I'm very familiar with) or even like French (a language I'm somewhat familiar with) than say Arabic or Russian (languages I know very little about)

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The first fandom I wrote for in my whole life was probably Percy Jackson? First fandom I actually posted a fic for was Supernatural/Doctor Who

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

like cards fluttering in the wind, my soul nemesis au. Literally the most fun I've had writing a fic, the concept I am most obsessed with. I'm not sure if it's the best thing i've written but is definitely up there in the top 5. Definitely some scenes are the best thing I've ever written

Tagging @arofili @gallus-rising @queerfandommiscellany @waitineedaname @river-gale @spittinwatches and anyone else who wants to do this

[standardquip]

Dysphoria

A video representation of my experience with dysphoria. Made in 2020.

Video:Bakemonogatari, Kizumonogatari, Vision of Escaflowne, Escaflowne (movie), Revolutionary Girl Utena (movie), Neon Genesis Evangelion, Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion, Devil May Cry (anime), Fullmetal Alchemist, Noragami, Steins;Gate, Blue Exorcist, Guilty Crown, K (TV), Death Note, Death Parade, Akira (movie), Demon Slayer, KARAS, Children of the Sea, Dorohedoro, Psycho Pass, Nisemonogatari, Your Name, Paprika, Perfect Blue, Le Portrait de Petit Cossette, Weathering With You, 5 Centimeters per Second, Charlotte, Attack on Titan, Black Clover, Bleach, Erased, Darwin's Game, Deadman Wonderland, Drifters, Fate Stay Night Unlimited Blade Works, Free!, Sunday Without God, Blood Blockade Battlefront, My Hero Academia, Owari no Seraph, Chivalry of a Failed Knight, Re: Zero, Rozen Maiden, Strike The Blood Third, Sword Art Online, The Rising of the Shield Hero, Macross Frontier Audio:JT Bruce – Hypnic Jerk Premiere Date:2020 Status:Downloadable, Streamable Genre(s):Horror, LGBT+, Other, Artistic Cons/Awards: Anime Weekend Atlanta 2020 PRO Contest: won “Best Technical”, finalist in “Artistic” Agamacon 2021 – Honorable mention “Endless Nightmare” YoumaCon 2021 – “Now in Technicolor!” Award Outside Links:.org

Dysphoria AKA Skeptic’s Hypothesis AKA Multicultural Panic Attack

Started: 12 dec 2019 Finished: 11 aug 2020 Work time: 47hr 58min in premiere 26hr 16min After Effects

General Comments I started out wanting to make a weird/creepy glitch video. But as I started making it it became something way more personal.

The part where I over-explain everything

I joined AWA PRO in 2019 with a video that was completely forgettable (Exposure). I came away from that feeling very weirdly defensive of my editing skills so I set out to make something to prove I could edit. That was the AMV Esoterra, which was largely a shallow, showy piece. Aside from the technicals, it’s also just a type of video I don’t generally make because nostalgia/vibe things don’t interest me much.

While that video was coming along I got the urge to do something edgy, and I have always wanted to do text and glitch effects in a video. I’ve had a love affair with JT Bruce’s “Hypnic Jerk” for several years so worked on cutting it down to something usable (the track is ~10 minutes long). Once that was done I set it aside to make after Esoterra was done, to make sure I finished it before the pro deadline. I didn’t intend to finish Dysphoria for PRO, but I figured if I finished it in time (a big IF) I would submit it in addition to Esoterra.

Once I started on Dysphoria, the time went by so quick. I wanted something that would separate the viewer from reality and just focusing on the song would have been enough. But I got this idea to attach it to something real. And eventually decided to roll with it. It’s weird, because when you look at these 2 videos (Esoterra and Dysphoria) You’d probably think Dysphoria was the gimmicky one, but it’s much closer to my brain than Esoterra is.

I’m not super open about it, but I’m transgender. I also have clinical/major Depression. I wanted Dysphoria to be about the fight you have in your head with yourself on whether or not you want to change, or if what you’re dreaming is really something you want.

During my time in the Navy (2009 – 2012) I was constantly fighting with myself on what I wanted more– transition or to stay in the navy? DADT was repealed shortly after I enlisted, but trans people were still largely unknown and had to be closeted. This video helped me work through some of that, I think. I had a pretty good idea I was trans when I joined, but I wasn’t sure until after boot camp. And once I went on my first deployment things sort of snowballed, and I was constantly weighing the pros and cons of staying in or getting out to transition (Obama’s trans inclusion thing didn’t happen to shortly after I was discharged).

I wanted this video to be relatable to anyone imagining what a mental crisis was like. It was very important to me that it was still “gender dysphoria” but it didn’t beat you over the head with it. I wanted it to be subtle. Something that maybe trans people would get but cis people could still appreciate without feeling like the vid has a specific message. Gender dysphoria can be fairly insiduous. I don’t think many people realize how much it can affect things. It is also easily attributable to other factors, so can be very hard to identify as an issue if you aren’t already 100% sure you’re trans. I guess this video is just relaying feelings, and the general steps/phases/stages you try to work through during a mental crisis or psychological break.

For the text, I watched a lot of AMVs with text in them and I learned that text seemed to work better when you weren’t concerned with reading it. So I made the text hard to read and I used it more as an artistic framing device. Any time the character was feeling the text, I tried to put the text on the character, especially over their face. There are two “worlds” in this vid, one being reality (which is almost always starring a female character), and one being the dream/fantasy. Reality is dim, has washed out colors and hard to read text. Fantasy has easier to read text but it’s usually in another language. It’s also way more raw and emotional, and not the lyrics of the song/track.

And, as especially the case for the first minute, I started out the text being fairly legible but then got more screwed up and harder to read as time progressed. Because in the beginning you think you’ve got things figured out, but the more you think about stuff, the harder it becomes to decide, and the more frustrated you get. Especially true for ~0:28 – 0:34ish, screwing with the text in such a way to be artistic but also to purposefully frustrate you that you cannot read it.

Which introduced an ongoing problem into my video: How do you make things specifically frustrating (especially the later glitches) without it being so frustrating that the video is no longer “good”? That was an ongoing conversation I had with at least 3 different beta testers. Much more about the glitches than the text, because I had very specific visions for the text. In the end, I think I figured it out okay so there is a good balance between “messy” and “not done well”. But that took several tries to get right.

People suffering with mental crises generally feel alone. So I wanted the characters in reality to be relatable but have a barrier between them and the viewer. That being the text, blurs, VHS overlays, etc. I especially tried to pick scenes where the real characters were not looking right at you.

Dream world is brighter, vibrant, hopeful. The characters you see yourself as (the boys) are looking at you, and they’re for the most part cool, badass characters.

The glitches were predominantly hand-made using the very scenes they’re on top of. I did have some presets, but I’d say 80% – 90% of glitches were made from scratch. The presets mostly got used during the elevator scene around 2:13 – 2:17and 2:31 – 2:35. The only other help I had making this were VHS overlays which got peppered in throughout the video.

Despite Esoterra taking more time, I’d consider Dysphoria to be much more technical and difficult to edit. In Esoterra I was playing with, and learning about, flow, composition, and overlays. The time it took to effectively learn and apply those things was immediately used in Dysphoria which surprisingly has a lot of the same core concepts, just utilized differently. Despite them being nearly ideological opposites, I don’t think I would’ve been able to make Dysphoria as good as it is without having the experience of making Esoterra first.

Scene selection was incredibly intentional for every single part, and caused a lot of headache at times due to not finding what I wanted. Because my specific theme was gender dysphoria (and even more specifically, female to male) girls only show up at specific times: – the real world – the very first time the character goes into the dream world “at first it is a plunge into hyper reality” – when the character is actively fighting with themself (the yes / no sections) – after an implied suicide attempt at 1:32, when dream/fantasy start become one.

In the “Yes / no” parts of the video, the boy is always yes, and the girl is always no. That is specific to gender dysphoria, and to FTMs. When you visualize yourself? Is it as a girl or a boy? It was always a boy. But some trans people (myself included) will go through phases where they dream as their real-world (non-transitioned) self. For me, I went through a long period of denial, so would try to force being ok with myself, even though it brought me pain.

So all the scenes with girls in them are painful. The scenes of boys start out cool and confident, but then become trapped and locked away. They get angry and kill the girl around 1:20, which then results in the mental breakdown that follows. The suicide attempt, the male self saving the female self, the overall anger and confusion, and the “crisis” part of the video. The crisis is: Now you know you have to do something. Will you finally accept this part of yourself? Will you finally transition? The overlays at 1:53 signify the decision. Glass breaking, hands parting, and scissors cutting an umbilical cord.

The next section is “Help”. The character finally recognizes that they need help, because they are finally accepting that there is a problem. But just because you recognize there’s a problem doesn’t mean you’re any good at solving it. Therein goes the brief period of survival in the dream with the super clear picture of the man saving the woman. It works in two ways, one at surface gender dysphoria level because it’s a dude being cool, the secondary being that the masculine side is saving the feminine side. “Hey. You don’t have to die. You’re still a part of me. You might be transitioning to male but that doesn’t mean my feminine side disappears.”

The elevator section of the video was one of the first sections I edited, and so it is predominantly just a glitch fest as a way to transition from living in escapism to getting back to reality. It ends at the scene of the girl in bed. For me this symbolizes depression more than anything else. You know you need help, you are constantly thinking about how to get it, but sometimes you just can’t fucking do anything. So we have that scene and then shinji (the boy) appears as a reflection beneath. The video ends with shinji waking up in the hospital and the question “Are you awake?” It’s a throwback to the original video’s premise of a skeptic’s hypothesis… Can never know if you’re dreaming or not. But also a sort of ambiguous ending of never knowing if the character got the help they needed or not. Are they still living in their dream of being a boy? Or did they actually transition and this is reality now?

¯_(ツ)_/¯

So anyway that’s my over-explanation of this video. I put it off for so long, partly because I don’t like revealing this part of myself, and partly because I don’t think it’s right to force my interpretation/message on anyone. But overall decided the pros in putting this essay out there outweighed the cons.

Since I finished this video in August 2019, released it publicly in December, and only now just wrote this explanation at the end of February the following year, I forgot a lot of things maybe I wanted to touch on in between that time. But this is long enough as it is. If you have any questions, feel free to hit me up I guess. Contact info in my profile.

Some things I want to point out just because As mentioned previously, all scene selection was super intentional. But a lot of it goes by so fast and seems kind of random so here’s some things I want to bring attention to lol.

0:02 – there’s an overlay here of more rain (dropping on the camera) and also some faint glowing eyes. I wanted to bring some paranoia into this video but this is the only part that panned out.

Beginning to 0:21 – Your Name was amazing to work with because it had the perfect amount of scenes of girls looking at boys and being sad about it. This establishes the character’s life up to this point as being unhappy with who she is. The scene of her staring in the mirror at the boy and then crying really sets up the whole gender dysphoria framing device without being obvious about it.

0:24 – anthy is a fragmented, bare, vulnerable individual with a trapped and tortured boy prince inside :)

1:20 – metaphor for self injury. Also foreshadowing of some other chest-based scenes. 1:23 – the result of the previous scene. This was the best anime representation I could find for ftm chest surgery. Obviously the scar is all wrong but it was the only chest scar scene I could find that looked kind of believable for what I was going for.

1:24 – 1:32 I synced the tracking dot to the beat lol. Also the text on the bed moves when she lays down on it.

1:57 – 1:59 is all scenes with barriers because the characters are all trapped. The last scene is a first person shot of looking down at boobs, which in context of all the suffering scenes leaning up to it are meant to imply that boobs are bad. Character has massive chest-related dysphoria. It’s a quick callback to the other 2 chest scenes.

2:01 – 2:05 is dilandau!! From Vision of Escaflowne. I won’t explain the scene because it’s a huge spoiler but if you know the anime/character you’ll know why I used it here. :)

Note: the (uncredited) live action footage is a recording of myself.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Many thanks to my beta testers and our discussions about the intricacies of glitches: Ash, Dr. Derpface, TheLazyDaze

Thank you to Synaethesia for helping me with the VHS overlays.

Thank you to Kriegher for the help with including Hindi as a language.

I also must mention ProstrateConstantly/ZaneWins, whose DESTRUCT vid and making of vid heavily inspired me to make my own glitch vid. And to CrackTheSky’s blog for mentioning DESTRUCT, as I otherwise never would’ve seen it. D E S T R U C T: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=878jSaMBtxw Making of DESTRUCT: CTS’s blog: https://crakthesky.wordpress.com/

Original track of JT Bruce – Hypnic Jerk: https://www.jamendo.com/track/24044/hypnic-jerk?language=en https://open.spotify.com/track/0e3aRWcOl7XqYNWP1ss5AO

I did a large amount of work to the song to make it work- here’s a screencap of my Premiere timeline for the song:

In (approximately) September 2021, JT Bruce commented on the youtube video!

[jabbage]

My Favourite Fanfics

2022 was the year I discovered fanfiction that I enjoyed reading, and I thought I'd share my mountain of fics that really stood out to me!

Jeeves and Wooster

Green Ice - Jeeves and Wooster & Lord Peter Wimsey

I'm hesitant to explain why I like this fic so much. It was 'spoiled' for me before I read it, and I wonder what the experience would have been like if I hadn't known where it was going ahead of time. So, perhaps I'll just say that it uses Bertie Wooster's position as possible unreliable narrator to add a really interesting dimension to his character and explore an aspect of note about the Jeeves and Wooster universe, and does so within a rip-roaring mystery which feels very authentic. AND Peter Wimsey is in it!

The War of the Worlds and All That - Jeeves and Wooster

In which Jeeves and Wooster thwart an alien invasion. Which is an utterly bonkers idea, somehow pulled off because said invasion hinges around the exact kind of dilemma which is entirely commonplace in Bertie Wooster's life. I was absolutely hooting with laughter throughout this whole thing.

Sherlock Holmes

The Craven Hive - Meticulously researched and textually deep historical pastiche with some absolutely beautiful character moments. Dr Watson returns from his war service and decides to assist in the treatment of shellshocked soliders. Of course when danger is at hand, he has to call in his old friend...

The Unsinkable Ship - Another meticulously researched piece. Holmes and Watson end up on board the Titanic. Much of the work is the pair going around exploring the ship, talking to each other and their fellow passengers (often real people), and dealing with navigating retirement together. They have such an old married couple vibe in this. Oh, and then the ship gets struck by an iceberg.

The Afterlife of Dr John H Watson - Good grief thing thing is absolute exquisite torture and I've read it I don't know how many times. Has entirely changed how I read 'The Blanched Soldier' and 'The Lion's Mane'. I get very very bored at 'kissy stuff' in stories, but the pivotal kiss in this GOT ME BAD.

The Taste of Truth - Delicious dark fantasy. If Neil Gaiman had written it, it would have won a Nebula.

Grit in the Sensor - Sherlock Holmes in the 22nd Century - Ok ok just hear me out on this one.... Sherlock Holmes in the 22nd Century is a very fun but silly Saturday Morning Cartoon which had a wealth of absolutely dynamite sci-fi concepts bubbling below the surface which it didn't ever address. One of these is that there is a robot who appears to have gained sentience by reading Watson's work. This fic unpacks that concept in a beautiful heartfelt way. It's narrated from Robot Watson's point of view, which leads to a delightful mixture of 19th century patois with machine logic.

Fullmetal Alchemist

Of Skulls and Secrets - I really enjoy it when people bring in the very bonkers real life history of alchemy into FMA stories, and this piece honestly feels like it could have been an extra chapter or OVA.

FMA Beyond - I don't know what to tell you. It's like Hiromu Arakawa wrote and illustrated more Fullmetal Alchemist. I got tingles when I started reading it. It gets Al right, which is always important to me :D

Others

Ciel D'Oro - The Name of the Rose

I can't believe somebody wrote a very decent sequel to The Name of the Rose and it's on Ao3 and you can read it for free.

Mister Vimes'd Go Spare - Discworld

If you were to tell me that this was actually written by Terry Pratchett, I would believe you. In my heart, this is what happened to Sam Vimes in the end.

A Man from the Stars - Doctor Who

Officially set my mind to rest about poor Joan Redfern.

Sing Down the Stars - The Chronicles of Narnia

Very beautiful reflection on Rilian from The Silver Chair ***

That's it for now! I'm sure I'll keep adding to this as I read more stuff :D

[terminaxshowtime]

R for the ask game!! -willow :P

R- Which friendship/platonic relationship is your favorite in the fandom?

'the fandom' isn't super specific, so i'll just list off a few that i'm a huge fan of off the top of my head:

Sissel & Lynne (Ghost Trick)

they are friends. they may have been in denial at the start but they are absolutely friends. the sillies. idk they're just great. not even sure how to elaborate about all this without saying spoilers and i won't want my poor unsuspecting mutuals (who, one day, will no longer be able to resist not playing the game) to read.

Mob & Reigen (Mob Psycho 100)

okay. this is. i don't even know how to describe their relationship. is it older brotherly? is it fatherly? is it student-teacher? i don't know. but it's great. this relationship was so integral to both their character developments and the plot and it was just so beautiful to watch throughout the series. i love it

Kirby & King Dedede (Kirby)

ANOTHER relationship which just develops throughout the story. it's so beautiful. as i heard someone once say on a youtube comment, "you either die a villain, or you live long enough to see yourself become a hero." this is what happened with dedede and kirby. their relationship is so beautiful, i love their friendship so much, i love them both. hyhyohughgughgughuoouhgughughh. huge fan of character and relationship development. adsjfdkoskgjbngjuikm this is such an underrated friendship too and i'm. i love it

Simon Petrikov & Marceline (Adventure Time)

alright so the other ones had character development which helped them discover themselves and be a better person and great friendships and all. this one is just straight up tragic. it's beautiful how their relationship helped simon hold onto himself before he went insane and just everything between these two is so sweet yet tragic. amazing family relationship. that is her dad, your honor, and literally everyone agrees.

The Pines family (Gravity Falls)

the vibes. the energy. this is just a great family relationship. they all care about each other so much and they have realistic issues and it's just. hyoyughu. and it's so sweet and happy too, and then on the other hand the future Exists, and also i can't formulate words, I give up, it's good. okay? it's good. there are some things i want to say but won't because being in the ghost trick fandom has trained me to never say even a single spoiler but. if you know you know. i love those two. and i love the entire family as well.

Ed & Al (Fullmetal Alchemist)

these guys are. good brothers. ok. i don't have much to say. they are perfect and they love each other so much. they try so hard. i. ahgh. i dislike how this relationship can get somewhat overshadowed by the fans overfocusing on romantic relationships with ed (FROM WHAT I HAVE SEEN), which is crazy considering the literal content of the original series being based on their brotherhood (i read the manga). def not underrated by any means i just love them a lot though and i think it's 1000 times more important than any possible romantic relationship in the series ever could be.

i love. friendship.

[patron-saints]

for the character meme: riza!

this one is gonna be a lot i can already tell

First impression

extremely professional, extremely loyal, didn't notice her much beyond one of my best friend's saying she was their fave so i was keeping an eye on her for them, but she didn't really click for me until she tripped mustang in the rain and then i was like OH. OH OKAY. so it's THAT kind of vibe

Impression now

dude. DUDE. where do i even start? my impression of her now is that she's one of the most complicated characters on fullmetal alchemist brotherhood and maybe one of the most complicated characters i've had the pleasure of writing. she is so full of dedication and loyalty and love and also constantly denying and depriving herself from things that could make her happy but also she is capable of having normal friendships apparently and she makes some of the most mature and calculated choices of anyone and also some of the most reckless and like. i'm always just like !!! ARE YOU GOOD?? (she's not) i love her so much and i want to take care of her and i also wanna shake her

also, she took a long time to becomes one of my faves! i was distracted by other faves and also because she was alex’s baby i didn’t want to step on toes but she’s like, cemented in there forever now. so it goes.

Favorite moment

the trip i was talking about before is deffo Key for me, but her figuring out the truth about pride is high up there, as is basically the whole promised day arc and when her and roy are doing the most queerplatonic shit in the whole world

Idea for a story

already published one (which i know you've read, because it wouldn't exist without you) and working on another, which you also know too much about

but for the sake of this question if i had to come up with a third i think doing something about her and rebecca at academy could be really fun and cute, or maybe just a one shot about every complicated feeling she has about her tattoos

Unpopular opinion

i think it's probably not a very popular headcanon that she's on the aromantic spectrum! this kinda comes from our qp royai conversations, but i also felt it manifesting a lot in her while i was writing rizalust. i think regardless of whether she wants to be in relationships, her understanding of what romance is and what it should be are deeply wrapped up in trauma and also deeply complicated

Favorite relationship

currently rizalust but in canon royai!

Favorite headcanon

other than aro riza which is very special to me, probably gnc for gnc royai where they are both waiting for the other one to come out as trans but it just. doesn't happen (an idea i stole directly from my partner but one i love)

[wuahae]

my all time favs are haikyuu and your lie in april !! i started watching in middle school as a deal to get my friend to listen to kpop LMAO 😭 on that note svt needs to sing an anime ost ASAP because run to you and together... woozi i know you got another one in you!!! (btw pls do tell me about those underrated shows!!) -prom anon

I LOOOVE YOUR LIE IN APRIL!!! i had a big haikyuu phase back in summer 2020 kfnakfk i met so many good friends because of it too 😭😭 i soooo agree with that i know woozi would be cheesed to produce an anime ost 🥹🥹🥹 i watched that one 5 hour vlive of him ranking all those anime and i’d never felt so seen before KFJSKFJSK but hmmmm ok well . my top recs are always always going to be fruits basket (2001 version and remake!) and fullmetal alchemist brotherhood :”)

but for underrated shows if you like a good historical action/romance, yona of the dawn is literally SO good people always forget about it when talking about good shoujo!! the next few shoujo im about to list aren’t exactly underrated in the shoujo world but in terms of the greater anime fanbase is sorta overlooked is ao haru ride!! super cute high school romance i think fondly of it! andddd hmmm this is less approachable but i also really like chihayafuru :”) AND. oh my god. this one anime called kamisama hajimemashita (or kamisama kiss in the english title) ITS SO GOOOOOODDDD i wish more ppl talked about it 😭😭😭😭😭 but i’m not gonna lie a lot of shoujo that are considered classics didn’t exactly…..Age well without nostalgia kfjakfnwkfk which is why i’m not recommending Too many 🥲

a good action anime i think isn’t mentioned Nearly enough is noragami :”) its sooo heartfelt and the characters hurt me so bad but i love them so much and i need a season 3 stat!!!!!! and demon slayer isn’t underrated At All but i do still really really like it 😔🫶 i have other action anime recs that fall under a more like . darker/more eccentric vibe that ill refrain from recommending for now cause i’m not sure if you’re into that genre but :”) if you’re ever interested lmk 🫶

also if you liked your lie in april for the music aspect of it there’s this one anime called kono oto tomare that’s about this koto club in high school and how they grow in both koto and themselves and their friendship in each other….💔💔💔💔 its so good im so serious …….

ALSO FOR SAD ANIMEEEEE OMG. ok not underrated but i recommend it every time . anohana: the flower we saw that day….THIS ANIME CHANGED ME FUNDAMENTALLY AS A PERSON IM SO SERIOUS…… (i can make a whole other recommendation list for anime Movies that i think everyone should watch . but ill refrain from that so this post doesn’t get Too long fjwkfjdk) but a good like. oh my gosh this anime makes me cry when i think about it but march comes in like a lion…. its definitely not for everyone like the tone is so sad and melancholic but its so healing 😭😭 you could find it a little boring considering a lot of the plotpoints center around shogi but like THATS NOT WHAT RLY MATTERS HERE …..its all about the Feeling………..

but yeah i have. so many recs i could talk about this for days but i don’t wanna recommend something that you might not like so 💔💔💔💔 i’m stopping myself Here even though there are so many personal favorites of mine that i adore JFNSKFK i hope i gave you an anime in this list that you haven’t heard of before!!

[soul-dwelling]

I think one thing that anime reboot people miss is that the original bones run had a certain vibe that is hard to quantify, that even if a reboot would be good it wouldnt recapture same soul(ironic) that it had and people would dislike it just for that. For example reading all the manga, seeing all the fanworks, fanfics even comics and animations - still I haven seen anything recapture the vibe that "Death City Theme" had. Other things are good in their own way ofcourse but still

There is that period of time, from 2003 to 2009, where Studio BONES had so many excellent series that could have been long-running franchises because there was that serendipitous intersection of animation talent, trademark humor, and gaps to be filled in the entertainment market. It’s how you can have such a variety of genres of tones in Soul Eater, Ouran High School Host Club, and Fullmetal Alchemist 2003 that just clicked with an audience. (It probably helps that all three of these happen to be animated by the same branch of BONES, that being Studio C.) 

You point out that there is a vibe; I agree. I think the sense of humor, including the pregnant pauses, helped. I think the visual style taken with their worlds, props, and characters stood out. The music was catchy. The animation was fluid. 

But some of this may not be only a vibe, but also the time. When more and more studios, including ones outside of Japan, start taking the same approach, it makes the vibe less special. 

But also, just look at the difference between Fullmetal Alchemist 2003 and Brotherhood: beyond sticking closer to the source material, the colors are more digital and somehow less vibrant while still bright, the gags are more cartoonish and exaggerated, a lot of pathos is lost or delayed (Greed’s death in 2003 seems so much harder to sit through emotionally than the admittedly more bittersweet ending for him in Brotherhood). 

I think that led to a turning point in BONES. It meant that the choices to get something to connect with the audience meant not sticking to what made Soul Eater et al work, but to be more experimental: it’s how we get Space Dandy, which, while a completely different vibe, was more ambitious and maybe even more successful artistically for experimenting with genre, storytelling, continuity, character complexity, character designs, and completely different art direction and animation from episode to episode for a disconnected visual and genre experience that basically made it 26 different films rather than one uniform anime. 

And after Space Dandy, and after everything else in animation, it’s not the same field. We have My Hero Academia with animation that is more fluid and action-y than even what we got in Soul Eater, we have stories that hurt even more and are more bloody than Fullmetal Alchemist in Jujutsu Kaisen, we have slapstick in Pop Team Epic that overshadows the farce of Ouran. It’s not that the new works take away from the old, but right now, the newer stuff is on the mind of a lot of viewers, making stuff like Soul Eater et al nostalgia viewing, a way to see how we got to this point and to enjoy what came before--but not necessarily a style we want to see replicated in newer works, at least not totally replicated. 

I think industry practices, the use of computers in coloring and animation, would make it so obvious how a reboot of Soul Eater is not like the original. I think there would be an insistence on more closely replicating Ohkubo’s current style, which is absolutely different from what BONES did in the first anime. I don’t know that the music, animation, and acting would seem like a continuation of what worked in the first anime and instead would be a wholly different beast. 

And yeah, there isn’t a remake (which fan art and fan fics and fan comics all are) that quite matches what was in the first Soul Eater anime. I think there can be great works that go even further with the Death City aesthetic than the original series did--and maybe I would enjoy that in fan works, but I’m not sure I would in the anime or a manga continuation (seeing as we kind of got that in the finale of Fire Force, and, ugh, making the whole world look like Death City was a mistake--even if, yes, that is technically canon, given how the three Prologue chapters made just about all of the rest of the world also have the Death City aesthetic).

[theanimeview]

[Analysis] [April Fools] Fullmetal Alchemist: A Glance at Alchemy

Source: https://fma.fandom.com/wiki/Alchemy?file=Simpletransmutation.png

By: Peggy Sue Wood | @pswediting

Welcome, fellow alchemists and (humor) enthusiasts, to a light-hearted exploration of the wild world of chemistry history using Fullmetal Alchemist as the base for our discussion because today we’re diving into the notion that alchemy was basically chemistry before they decided to ditch all the woo-woo shenanigans. Grab your philosopher’s stone and let’s embark on a journey through the transmutation circles of science!

Alchemy was, historically speaking, the OG of woo-woo sciences. Philosopher’s stones, mystical symbols, and the pursuit of the elixir of life were all part of the package deal. In a whimsical revival of the historically disproven science, the creator of Fullmetal Alchemist (FMA) decided to give alchemy a 21st-century makeover that took the almost-mumbo-jumbo that was once used as a method to help heal people (not just make them rich) and turned into war crimes.

Of course, as the Elric brothers progressed in their alchemical adventures, it becomes increasingly clear that the mystical side of traditional alchemy had been replaced by a more down-to-earth, science-y vibe for the series which is nice. I mean, sure, there were still flashy transmutation circles and cool glove-snapping fire sequences, but beneath the surface, it’s all boils down to some actual science regarding chemical reactions (you know, plus the occasional explosion for dramatic effect). However, in all seriousness (not really), alchemy in FMA is about the weaving of periodic tables, and less about magic. Equivalent exchange is the golden rule of alchemy, ensuring that nothing is gained without something of equal value being lost. This principle may sound a lot like the laws of thermodynamics, but hey, alchemists had it first! Forget about balancing chemical equations; the Elric brothers were masters of balancing the cosmic scales while pulling off jaw-dropping feats against a bunch of homunculi.

OKAY, now, sincerely—setting aside the April Fools aspect of this post.

FMA does give some credibility to the ideas behind Alchemy from a historical sense. I mentioned above that it used to be a healing science, and that’s because it was. We didn’t have chemistry the way we have it now, in the same way that we didn’t have medical knowledge and access to technology that we do now. There are a lot of things that we don’t understand about the human body and while we know more now than in the past, that doesn’t mean that some of things we consider “common” knowledge won’t be outright nightmarish ideas to the future of humanity, in the same way that lobotomies are now considered stuff of horror films but were actually viewed as a sincere advancement in treatment that was practically the only effective treatment for severe, mental conditions until more advancements could be made.

While alchemists in modern interpretations are sometimes given fantastical myths in games and stories, or seen as greedy horrible con-artists, there was a time when they were blurring lines with medical doctors. Arguably, what founded chemistry as a science is alchemy.

Much like the World War that inspired FMA’s militaristic storylines, this adjustment of using Alchemy as their base for magic—a magic system routed within workable science concepts—is a fascinating revival of the ideas of what alchemy used to be for parts of the world: a science. While outside of this is ties into a major concept of FMA, which is that neither a complete reliance on religion or a complete reliance on “science” is truth because both are incomplete sets of knowledge and ideas.

With so may religions in the world, many that have overlapping ideas and many that have significantly divergent ideas as well, we don’t know what the exact “truth” is, because we don’t have all the pieces. The same can be said for our sciences. I mean, we just learned in the last five years how general anesthesia works, assuming that the study is correct because it too is building off of theories and “proofs” for those theories that we have about the human body.

It’s an interesting look, essentially, at how the creator of FMA, Hiromu Arakawa, has so deeply developed that major theme that it even boils down to the real-world example of Alchemy.

I really think it is a fascinating concept and so, if you have time, I encourage you to take a glance at the history of the topic!

–

Editorial Note: This post was inspirational by Krow’s stimulating comment when I compared FMA’s alchemy to bad chemistry, “Alchemy was chemistry before they got rid of all the woo-woo shit.” I felt like this was just the perfect line to inspire a really borderline comedic post for our return. Thanks for reading!

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[irresistiibles]

was that zhang zhehan? oh no no, that was just ling yao, a canon character from fullmetal alchemist. they are twenty three years old, use he/him, and are aware that they are not actually from washington dc. too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

how long has your character been here

like a month or so. he's adjusted but hasn't seen any of the chaos yet. he will pretend not to be adjusted to have an easier time or get free things.

what is your character’s job

he's teaching some martial arts classes. mostly for children but he probably teaches on adult class. he's pretty good at it but he's also very goofy so not a lot of people take him seriously. it's also important to know that ling is a grifter to his core. if you let him talk to you for too long he will manage to get a free meal out of you and he absolutely winds up with extra money and items that he shouldn't have.

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom

i don't have an exact moment in mind but sometime after he becomes greedling but before the final battle, so he's definitely having a weird moment of wondering wtf happened to the manifestation of greed that had been consensually possessing him.

has any magic affected your character

nope!

any other info

first of all i am aware his fc looks older than 23 but that was a purposeful decision! in canon ling looks older than he actually is so that is just part of his vibe, you think you're gonna get someone late 20s who's a responsible adult and instead it's ling who's 23 and an idiot.

another one of my goofy little guys who is more serious than he lets on.

though ling yao isn't really trying to deceive anyone or come off different than how he is. he is just a silly little guy, he's just capable of being serious when he cares

he's not sure how much he cares here in washington. i considered having him be involved in the government here but at the end of the day ling is pretty stubbornly devoted to his nation back home

i would say he's easy to get along with except he's pretty annoying

especially still here in washington. he doesn't understand what's going on or where he is, but he does understand there's some sort of magic or ability he hadn't previously heard of.

the man is on the hunt to become immortal, and with all the supernatural people here he will be very intrigued by the possibilities (i am not going to have someone turn him immortal but he will want it)

ambitious and borderline greedy but has a good heart. sometimes greed is wanting to protect everyone even when it isn't possible okay

and in regards to that though he is annoying he's relatively easy to befriend and is very protective and serious when it comes down to the people he cares about

a bit of a hypocrite. he's annoying, knows it, and doesn't care but will absolutely lecture people on their faults

so impulsive and stubborn. when he wants something he will do the dumbest things to get it

like purposefully getting possessed in order to be immortal!! which is something ling does in the show!!! luckily he befriends the dude possessing him but that really sums up how bad his decision making can be.

potential plots:

not something that would be preexisting but absolutely down for some doppleganger nonsense. ling is an idiot and would respond to someone calling him a different name by being like "oh yeah, jun wu, haven't used that title in a moment. my friends actually call me ling." so very possible he gets in trouble for this.

anyone who takes his martial arts class, or who's kid takes his class

anyone he's somehow swindled some free meals out of

literally anyone who counts as a supernatural creature he can annoy (especially if they're immortal. this weirdo wants to be immortal so fucking bad)

a genuine gym/sparring buddy

any friends do just hang with. he loves hunting down nice restaurants.

enemies/annoyances lmao though i can't promise ling would take anything like that all that seriously.

someone who ling has decided is a friend even though he's mostly just annoying them

literally anything pls the fma brainrot is real

[ladyofthelilacs]

Reading Catch Up!

In my first post on this new blog (many moons ago...) I mentioned that I'd be keeping folks up to date on what I'm reading! That didn't happen, haha. But, I've really gotten back into reading this year, and I want to report all the great books I've read so far, and some thoughts on them! There's 15 of 'em, so get ready!

Let's go!

first things first:

The Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton

I started reading this in early 2022 or so. A friend gave me a hearty recommendation for it and I decided to give it a go! After too long, I finally finished it and loved it to pieces. This is a great book, with rich characters and very sharp wit. I recommend it for fans of historical fiction (which it was even for its time, haha) and particularly longing kinds of romance.

4.5/5 Stars from me!

Little, Big: Or, the Faerie's Parliament by John Crowley

This is a beeeg book, and one that is sort of difficult to describe. It's in parts a generational epic, historical fiction, urban fantasy, and a bit of this and that all in between. Its plot sort of unfolds over the course of a lot of smaller stories that entwine into one, and I think that's really cool! It's one of those books that runs 90% on vibes-- if you like the vibes, you'll probably like it a lot! But it's also a book where if someone told me they just didn't like it at all, I'd completely understand, haha.

Another 4.5/5 Stars from me!

A Far Wilder Magic by Allison Saft

This one I had my eye on for a while due to the beautiful cover by Em Allen, whose work I'd followed for a bit! My High Fantasy project also involves a magical hunt and is in third present, so I figured this book would be good for inspiration on that front as well! The funny thing about this book in particular is that I was able to tell pretty clearly where the author got some inspiration. I don't think that's a problem, it just amuses me as a fellow Fullmetal Alchemist fan, hehe.

I'm curious if there will be more stories in this setting, or following these characters. I would be interested in that, especially since-- while I liked this book-- I felt this one had a few bumps in the road. Still, I'd recommend it.

4/5 Stars from me!

The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

I love this book, I love this book, I love this book~! This is the book that fully convinced me to commit to third-present perspective for my aforementioned High Fantasy project. Its prose is gorgeous, its world is interesting, its characters are likable-- really, I just liked it an awful, awful lot. It's yet another book where I could understand why some people wouldn't like it that much, but it struck a big chord with me. Please read it (if you'd like to).

5/5 Stars from me (wow!)

The Poe Clan by Moto Hagio (Volume 1)

I have the second volume of the omnibus, but I haven't read it yet. This was just the nicest picture online I could find of the cover of the first volume-- weird, right?? I actually started reading this book in 2022 as well, but it's a pretty chonky read and episodic, so I dipped in and out throughout the year. I finished the first volume in early 2023 and really enjoyed it! It's a great piece of vintage manga with beautiful art and an entertaining, very Capital-R Romantic story.

4/5 Stars from me!

(You may notice...I like a lot of books, haha. Onward!)

The Tropic of Serpents: A Memoir by Lady Trent by Marie Brennan

This is a sequel to A Natural History of Dragons by the same author. You should read that one first! Both books are a lot of fun, and this one is no different! They're good books to read quickly, I think, because they've got a very adventurous quality to them-- after all, they're sort of calling back to old adventure serial novels! This one especially seems to draw from that tradition, but does so in a new way that smartly plays with the exoticization of "non-Western" cultures that often occurred in those old novels. Give it a go if you like adventures and dragons (and the first novel)!

4/5 Stars from me

Galileo's Daughter: A Historical Memoir of Science, Faith, and Love by Dava Sobel

This book is an odd one out in that it's non-fiction! Wow! This was another recommendation from a friend (the same friend who recommended me Age of Innocence!) and I enjoyed it immensely. It's an interesting piece of historical work, and it's fun to read to boot! I found myself feeling very emotional by the end. I recommend it if this historical period and its case of characters interests you in any way.

4.5/5 Stars from me!

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke

Susanna Clarke is an author who's been on my radar for a while, mainly because I really liked what I read of Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, but...it's a really long book, and I got very busy, and I haven't been able to dive back into it yet. Someday! But, Piranesi is much shorter, and a very different book in a lot of ways. It's a fun mystery, and I won't spoil it since it's the kind of mystery that gives very fun re-read bonuses when you go back to it. When I wrote about it on Storygraph, I mentioned that it would be a good read for fans of the game Cultist Simulator. There are some very similar vibes here...

4.5/5 Stars from me! (Though maybe it's closer to 5? I tend to reserve 5's for books that really change my brain chemistry. I don't think this one quite managed that, but I really did like it a lot. High 4.5!)

Legendborn by Tracy Deonn

Another recommendation from a friend (different friend from the one mentioned earlier, but another friend with good taste, haha)! Legendborn is a newer YA series playing with the King Arthur legend. I do like some Arthurian stuff, and this book does some very cool, very clever things with it! The emotional core of the story is very raw, so it can be a bit heavy at times; however, that's not a detriment to my recommendation of it. It's got all sorts of great twists, turns, commentary, and characters that you want to root for to the very end!

I'm looking forward to reading the sequel, but I need to get through more of my TBR stack first!

4/5 Stars from me!

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern

Do you like books? This book likes books, and storytelling in general! Its plot is more mysterious at first compared to The Night Circus (which is saying something given the way that book is set up), but when it gets going, it really gets going! It's another book where I liked it a lot, but I can see why it wouldn't grab some folks. I want to re-read both sometime to see if my thoughts change, but right now I think I like The Night Circus just a little more. Just a little bit. This book is still fantastic, and a big recommend from me!

4.5/5 Stars from me (maybe that'll turn into a 5 on a re-read? Like Piranesi, it's a really high 4.5).

Wyrd Sisters by Terry Pratchett

Discworld, my beloved...it's been too long. I love Terry Pratchett's work immensely. Night Watch in particular is still hanging on to my top five favorite books of all time! If you know anything about that book, it's very obvious that I love it very, very much. I've read the City Watch subseries a lot, and a good chunk of the Death subseries, but the Witches subseries had been pretty neglected on my part, so I'm going back to it! Wyrd Sisters is early Discworld, which means it's still getting all those things that make Pterry's work so, so especially good, but it's still a really fun time and I'd recommend it! I'm looking forward to reading more in this subseries for sure!

4/5 Stars from me!

Equal Rites by Terry Pratchett

Speaking of the Witches...Equal Rites is technically the first book in the Witches subseries, but it's a bit of an odd duck in that regard. Going backwards from Wyrd Sisters to it is a strange experience, since there's so much different between even just a few early Discworld novels! It's...fine. "Just fine" from Terry Pratchett is still pretty good overall, but while I overall enjoyed my read and felt very interested by the end (where it really picks up!), a lot of the novel just didn't grab me like other, later Discworld books do. Even without that considered, it just doesn't pick up as much steam until later.

A solid 3/5 Stars from me! It's Okay!

The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

This one's familiar for anyone who's been on tumblr long enough, haha. I remember this book getting really popular years and years ago, but I never got around to reading it myself until just this year, when my writing group had it for book club! It's definitely a good read, full of heart and very clear knowledge on the subject matter! Miller puts in a ton of excellent detail about the language, the history, and other stories from around the period. I think it's a wonderful interpretation of the legend, and I'd recommend it for anyone with an interest in Greek myth (I would also just recommend it to anyone in general, but you know).

4/5 Stars from me!

Half a Soul by Olivia Atwater

This book was really fun! That doesn't feel completely accurate to say, since it also handles some pretty heavy subject matter, but it's true! It handles its darker elements deftly, and its lighter elements with a good touch. It's a nice blend, and I liked this spin on the Regency Romance and the historical fantasy. The more I read, the more it started to remind me of the works of Diana Wynne Jones (folks who can't recall the name would know her as the author of Howl's Moving Castle, a book I love and heartily recommend!). That's always a positive to me.

A solid 4/5 Stars from me! I liked it a lot and am looking forward to reading the rest of the series.

The Latch Key by Olivia Atwater

Last one! This is a very short novella set almost immediately after Half a Soul. It's very heartfelt and sweet, and it made me smile (and tear up) to read. Again, looking forward to reading the rest of this series, and seeing more of these very lovable characters!

4/5 Stars from me!

PHEW! That's everything! I don't mind writing a big ol' post like this sometimes, but that's a lot of typing! And a lot of books! Just about five or six months at that (I'm not counting most of June because I've been re-reading my own book in preparation for final revisions)!

If you find something you like, let me know!