#WHAT WOULD SAWA ASK

[skania]

Oshi no Ko Chapter 154 Thoughts - Or the many many parallels between Ai/Kamiki and Akane/Aqua

In my post about last chapter, I listed a number of parallels showing that the way Kamiki felt about Ai is very reminiscent of the way Aqua felt about Akane.

I also said:

if Aka pulls that, then that would confirm that all of these parallels are very much intentional.

And what did Aka pull this chapter?

To top it off, now it isn't only Kamiki's feelings that parallel Aqua's. Ai's feelings are very much like Akane's, to the point that she nearly quotes her word for word at times 😭

I'll start chronologically because the amount of parallels is just insane. To keep this short, I won't bring up the Kamiki/Aqua parallels since I already went over those here. I'll just focus on Ai!

Ai didn't want to break up with Kamiki, but she did it because she feared that she and her children would be burdens to him, who was almost on the verge of breaking due to the weight of life.

Does that ring any bells?

Akane didn't want to break up with Aqua, but she was willing to do so because she feared that she and their fake relationship were burdening him by worsening the weight of his guilt.

Ai wanted to stay with Kamiki forever, just like Akane with Aqua.

Ai wanted to carry Kamiki's burden and walk into the future with him, just like Akane with Aqua.

Ai didn't know what loving someone felt like, but Kamiki was the first time she felt she wanted to love someone that way. Akane didn't know what loving someone that way felt like, either. Aqua was her first.

Most importantly:

Ai wanted to save Kamiki, just like Akane wants to save Aqua. While it was translated as "help" in English, in Japanese Ai uses the exact same verb as Akane when she says that she wants to "save" Aqua.

Even their expressions when thinking about their wish are similar 😭

And the thing is that — technically, logically �� none of this can be a coincidence, because this is a fictional story and Aka is nearly using copy-pasting to stablish these parallels. But since this is Aka we're talking about, whether this will lead anywhere or turn out to be just bait remains to be seen lol

I feel like Ai isn't only paralleling Akane this chapter though, it's also possible to establish parallels between her and Aqua. Namely, Aqua also broke up with Akane to protect her, Aqua didn't understand what love was and he showed that he wanted to love Akane despite it.

Plus, when Aqua broke up with Akane to protect her, he did so in a way that would deliberately paint him in a bad light — just like Ai with Kamiki.

I'd also like to point out that in this chapter, Ai's feelings are described as, well, "Ai" 愛. In Japan, "Ai" 愛 is the strongest form of love, which can be either platonic or romantic. This is very relevant, because by making Ai's feelings for Kamiki so strikingly similar to Akane's for Aqua, Aka has essentially confirmed strongly implied that the kind of love Akane feels for Aqua is "Ai" 愛, too.

And Ai's "Ai" 愛 was romantic.

For those who aren't familiar with the concept of "Ai" in Japan, I feel like this post explains it very well:

愛 (Ai): sacrificial, unconditional, love for the other person's sake (often parallels the Greek agape, but can extend into philos as sawa mentions) 恋 (Koi): selfish, conditional, love for one's own sake (often parallels the Greek eros) While both can be used for romantic love, you cannot simply swap out one for the other. The contrast between the two shows up clearly in the したい forms of 愛する and 恋をする: 愛(Ai)したい I want to love [someone in a deep, unconditional way] 恋(Koi)がしたい I want to [fall in] love [with someone and experience the "high" of being in love]

If you ask me, the contrast between those two types of love perfectly exemplifies the difference with the way Akane's and Kana's feelings are being written. Coincidentally, Kana herself described her feelings as 恋 (Koi) in Chapter 150 lol

So considering all of this, I'm having the hardest time not seeing Kamiki and Ai as a sort of "failed" Aqua and Akane. Kamiki and Ai were too broken, and neither could handle their relationship in a healthy way despite their best intentions and how much they loved each other. Kamiki was too dependant on her, Ai broke up with him in the clumsiest way possible and Kamiki lashed out in a selfish, tragic way.

I'd argue that despite their mishaps, Aqua and Akane have already shown that they're healthier than Kamiki and Ai were. Even when he was at his lowest, Aqua was self-aware and did his best to not depend on Akane too much. When he faltered, Akane reminded him that it's important that they remain independent so they can have a healthy relationship.

Which takes me to something I think is very important:

Ai thought that Kamiki would be fine without her, but she was wrong. If she had been right, then maybe she would be alive today and she and Kamiki would've gotten back together later down the line.

I'm sure that Akane, too, thinks that Aqua will be fine without her. Aqua most definitely thinks the same thing about Akane.

And for them to be able to have a healthy relationship, it's important for them to be right. They need to be able to be fine without the other, and as of now, it seems like Aqua is finally making progress in that regard.

But what about being happier? Akane was at her happiest when she was with Aqua, and according to Aqua himself, it was the same for him. If we forget all the recent fiascos for a second and entertain the thought of Akane and Aqua once again, I feel like this should be the biggest factor into whether or not they get back together.

After all, if they get back together it shouldn't be because Aqua can't function without Akane. It should be because he wants to be with her (and she with him). So if Aka were to be a good writer allow them to find their way back to each other, this time spent apart could be crucial to let them restart on a healthy base.

But I digress! 😂 Instead of getting ahead of myself, I just want to enjoy the fact that these parallels are right there for everyone to see. At least no matter what happens, we now pretty much have confirmation that the way Aka wrote Aqua and Akane was both, romantic and the strongest form of love.

As for the plot, the fact that Ai's wish was this clear kind of opens an entire can of worms questions-wise. Moreover, I feel like if telling Kamiki that Ai loved him was Aqua's revenge plan all along, things like these would make very little sense in retrospective:

So for the sake of logic, I'm inclined to believe that Aqua, who didn't know what love was and who held a grudge against Kamiki, may have wanted to believe that Ai truly couldn't love Kamiki. He may have desperately wanted to believe that Ai was saying the truth, because otherwise taking revenge against Kamiki would mean going against Ai's wishes.

I feel like Aqua originally misinterpreting Ai's words is supported by the fact that even during the movie recording, Aqua was shown to not understand Ai.

So, what changed his mind? What made him finally realize that Ruby's portrayal was right and that Ai truly did love Kamiki?

Plus, Aqua has had that DVD for years now, which means that nothing was stopping him from realizing that Akane herself was echoing Ai's feelings for Kamiki throughout their relationship.

But I better stop myself right here, because if I start theorizing about this there will be no end to it. The possibilities are endless, so I'd rather just wait and let Aka either pleasantly surprise like he did this chapter me or continue to disappoint me as he is prone to do 😂

edit;

I just realized there are even more parallels when you get down to it. I mentioned before in my Chapter 97 post that during the phone-call that ultimately leads to their break-up, Aqua and Akane are like two ships in the night. They both want the same thing (to stay together), but in her haste to help him, Akane makes a choice that leads to their separation.

The same thing happens with Ai and Kamiki. They both want the same thing (to stay together), but in her haste to not burden him, Ai chooses to walk away from him.

Ai doesn't understand her own love and is thus unable to understand the extent of Kamiki's. She makes the mistake of thinking that the best way to save Kamiki is to not impose more burdens on him, when all he wanted was to stay with her. I'd argue something very similar happened with Akane. She made the mistake of thinking that the best way to help Aqua was to carry out his revenge for him, when all Aqua wanted from her was to remain by her side.

[devilsrecreation]

Buckle up bc this is gonna be heavy

Imagine an “It’s a Wonderful Life” type TLG fanfic/episode (ik ik cliche much?) where Jasiri starts having doubts about being an under-appreciated ruler of the Outlands after a particularly bad day. She doesn’t wish that she was never born, but she DOES start to wonder if she made the right choice of agreeing to the role of Prime Minister. Cue Ushari’s ghost visiting her in her dreams and telling her how the Outlands would be worse without her ruling it, and it soon devolves to what an alternate world would look like without her in it

-Without her, Kion’s perception of hyenas wouldn’t have changed and he wouldn’t have learned “Sisi ni Sawa”. Not only him, but she showed a lot of animals how there were good hyenas

-Not only has she saved Janja’s life multiple times, but she changed his views on life in general. He would have never started respecting the circle of life. At the most, he’d probably be dead and his boys would follow through without a leader

-Janja may have told Kion how to defeat Scar, but it was really her who convinced everyone to actually listen to him in the first place

-Life would have definitely been harder for her clan if she was never born. Madoa wouldn’t have a shoulder to cry on or anyone to assure her that the clan will get through their hardships. Hell, I don’t know if Wema and Tunu would have made it without her since she always put their needs over hers

-The rest of the Outlanders would have never had another chance had she not been a prime minister

-Reirei and her pack wouldn’t have accepted to respect the circle of life and would have been worse off had they moved

-Kiburi’s float would have stayed independent…and that would have been their downfall. Unlike the Pridelands, the Outlands have less food and water. Because of Kiburi’s pride, he wouldn’t think or trust anyone to ask for help and his float would have been starving and dehydrated. This would lead to arguments and Kiburi pushing his friends away…eventually, for good

-Mzingo would have tried to rule the Outlands, but no one, except for his parliament, would listen to him. Not even the hyenas. This would make him give up and flee the lands in search for a better life, leaving the animals they raised to fend for themselves without their wisdom

-The skinks would have stayed cold and bitter about Scar and Ushari’s deaths. If not for Jasiri’s idea to reform, all they’d be to the rest of Africa was another food option, since they wouldn’t meet Kenge or Sumu to protect them

-Speaking of Kenge and Sumu, she’s been their therapist. She listens to their problems and she’s taught them that not everyone is bad. Without her rule, the two wouldn’t have pushed themselves to be better animals and instead be all alone and bitter, the both of them dying emotionally AND physically

It could be the same for Kiburi as well. Maybe he’s tired of messing up or he doesn’t believe that he could really change because of all the bad things he’s done. But believe it or not, he’s done a lot of good things without even realizing it and the world would kind of suck if he had never been born:

-Piga would have never genuinely smiled or have his spirits lifted, not even with Ucheshi. Kiburi is his pride and joy and had he never existed, Piga simply wouldn’t have been happy. And to add on, Piga would be much harder on his kids, with Ucheshi being effected the most

-Ucheshi may be the exact opposite of Kiburi and he HAS said things like “How are we related?”. But he has never EVER encouraged her to change who she was. Kiburi is the reason she’s so happy and free, because he let her be herself. Piga wasn’t like that. Under his rules, she would have lost her spirit and become cold and untrustworthy, making others cry instead of laugh. Not to mention, Kiburi played a role in her and Makuu’s love story. His banishment and their argument was essentially the cause of them falling on love, with Makuu comforting Ucheshi and Ucheshi making Makuu laugh, which made him develop feelings for her and show his tender side. Have I mentioned how close they are? Like Kiburi is genuinely a good brother to her

-Tamka wouldn’t be accepted for who he is. Everyone judged him, everyone dismissed him for lacking intelligence. But not Kiburi. Kiburi was the first friend Tamka ever made and who didn’t seem to judge him, thus why he remained loyal. Tamka wouldn’t have anyone to really depend on without him

-Oh Nduli….poor poor Nduli. His life would have been miserable if they never met. Kiburi was the one Nduli really looked up to, the one who was always so nice and welcoming when he first hatched. It was Kiburi who convinced Piga to take him in after Kinywa died, it was Kiburi who cared for him most of his life, and it was Kiburi who promised that nothing bad was going to happen to him no matter what. Who knows what would happen to him without the best croc in his eyes?

-Neema wouldn’t have anyone to appreciate his intelligence. Sure, he’d follow Makuu and he’d still live in the Pridelands with Tamka and Nduli, but he wouldn’t be happy about it. He always really sided with Kiburi about a lot of things, he just kept quiet about it.

-If you think about it, Kiburi’s the reason Makuu turned out to be such a great leader. As hatchlings, Kiburi was Makuu’s greatest support system ever since he said he wanted to be the next leader. Makuu beating Kiburi proved to be good sparring practice and he used those skills to win the mashindano. Even after the friendship ended, he still inadvertently helped Makuu grow, with him repeatedly defeating Kiburi proving his development to the members that were still wary of the new change in leadership.

-Hodari would have never joined Makuu’s float. Hodari helped Makuu defeat Kiburi with a hurt leg and that got him to be an honorary crocodile. Without him, the rejection would have destroyed his lively, happy-go-lucky personality over time with broken dreams

-Even though it was Makuu who used to idolize Pua, not even he took some of his lessons to heart like Kiburi did. It’s subtle, but Pua can tell when someone listens to his advice and he appreciates that. It’s the little things that keep Pua going :)

-Kiburi didn’t think anything of it, but calling Kenge “big” did something to the lizard. The only other animals who did that were ones (mostly reptiles) that were smaller than him, but to have someone bigger say it so casually, it hit different. For the first time, Kenge felt truly validated. He got to be seen as an equal and that wouldn’t have been possible if Kiburi didn’t exist

-Hukumu would have kept thinking that bad/evil animals don’t change for the better, but when she met Kiburi…that changed. It was understandably hard for her to accept that her love wasn’t…the best crocodile, but he proved that he changed since then

-Wakali’s simple. Without a father to adopt and love her, she wouldn’t be alive

-Oh and Hatari would still be alive and have eventually killed all the crocodiles in the Pride Lands. His crocodile-hating reign of terror wouldn’t have ended if Kiburi wasn’t there to stop him. Not to mention the effect the lack of crocodiles would have in the circle of life

-If there’s one good thing that Kiburi is constantly doing, it’s how he ALWAYS has his friends’ backs. How he’s so protective over them and deep down, just wants everyone to be treated right. Before the dry season, all of his intentions were good. He just went about it via the crocodile way bc that’s how he was raised

Jasiri ends up getting an appreciation party for all the stuff she goes through and Kiburi comes back feeling more grateful about where he is now

[dawn-sunlight]

A New Way To Go Analysis

I believe A New Way To Go is the best Lion Guard song because absolutely everyone brought their A game while making it. The visuals are amazing, the tune is catchy, but I think the best thing about the song is how well it illustrates exactly what's going through Janja's head. There's so much character work you can glean from the song and that's what's so good about it.

“Why am I so confused?  It all used to be so simple.” - Jasiri has completely upset the status quo for Janja; she doesn’t fit in his worldview because she’s a strong, capable hyena who follows the Circle of Life, is friends with a lion(the leader of the Lion Guard no less), and has saved him from death twice now despite being on the opposite side as him, and he can’t ignore his growing feeling that maybe everything he’s known all his life is actually wrong. He didn’t know there was another way, he genuinely thought he had to act like this, but now that Jasiri has offered him another way, he can’t get himself to just forget about it and carry on like normal.

“What changed?  Think!” - He didn’t used to have these doubts, and he’s trying to figure out what’s different now.  He’s trying to figure out and understand what has changed significantly enough to make him question his life and his beliefs like this.

“Jasiri doesn’t fear me she’s been saving my hide!” - He wants to be seen as this tough and intimidating figure, and at first it bugs him that Jasiri isn’t intimidated by him as seen in Never Judge a Hyena by It’s Spots, but now it just confuses him.  And on top of that, she saves him, not just once but twice, despite being on the opposite side as him.

“I know she buys the whole ‘Circle of Life’” - The choice of words here(he says Jasiri “buys” the concept rather than she follows it or respects it or something like that) implies that Janja thought the concept was literally made up and not real, which I do believe is a different case than someone who knows the concept is real and still decides they want more than their fair share.

“I mean, Si Si Ni Sawa’s kinda catchy all right.” - He’s trying to justify to himself why he’s been thinking about what Jasiri said so much.  Also, this song confirms he saw at least the last verse of Si Si Ni Sawa because 1. He knows the chorus to the song despite having never having been sung it, 2. He knows Jasiri sung it to Kion, and 3. He imitates the thing Kion and Jasiri did at the end of the song in his last verse of the chorus.

“He’d never give me something a hyena couldn’t handle, would he?” - Janja's trying really hard to rationalize Scar's behavior and treatment of him and his clan, but his faith in Scar is starting to waver. In the visuals, we see Scar with his master plan, and then we see Janja, Cheezi, and Chungu holding the ground up for him because they’re doing the heavy lifting for Scar.  But when Janja asks “would he?” indicating that he no longer has complete and total faith in Scar, the whole thing crashes down.

This shot right here is beautiful, it really just sums up the whole song in one singular frame.

“‘Si si ni sawa’ means ‘we’re the same’” “Oh no!  It set something off inside my brain!” - Janja hates that Jasiri’s words make sense to him, and he hates that they’re resonating with him even more.

“She says I can trust her but I don’t know, could there really be a new way to go?” - Janja genuinely doesn’t know any better and that’s why he acts the way he does.

“It’s like I’d rather be happy then scrapping for food or respect ugh what’s happening?” - I think this is the line that gets me the most because it shows that Janja never considered his own feelings on things to be more important or even of equal importance than living up to expectations, and when he finally considers “maybe I’d be happier on the other side” he goes “this is ridiculous why am I thinking like this?”  To Janja, it didn’t matter what he actually wanted, because the way others saw him and getting food were more important than silly things like happiness.

“Maybe the stuff I thought was wrong was right! I think I like it but I’m still undecided how to choose, what to do!” - He’s torn between what he’s known all his life as the truth and what he’s “supposed” to do vs what his feelings are saying on the matter.

Since Jasiri told Kion they’re the same, if Janja accepts that what Jasiri says is true and Jasiri and him are the same, that means he also accepts that Kion and him are the same, and Janja knows this.  During the first chorus of A New Way to Go, Jasiri sings Si Si Ni Sawa to Janja, while in the second, she sings it to Kion.  While in the first instance Janja seems more worried about the fact that it resonated, in the second instance Janja seems more annoyed about this.  This and the fact that he crushes them with his paw during the second time indicates that he knows accepting what Jasiri said also means accepting that Kion and him are the same, and that’s something he really does not want to acknowledge.

One of the things the visuals of this song really show is that Janja clearly feels separated from the other side, even Jasiri, and doesn’t know if he really could switch sides because of the divide he feels.

The ending shot is very interesting because of this; while Janja still has his Outlander coloring, the Outlander spotlight is gone, making him still stick out but putting him in the same world as Jasiri and her hyenas, indicating that Janja has accepted what Jasiri is saying, even if only subconsciously.

Jasiri’s portrayal here vs The Worst Hyena We Know is pretty interesting, because in that song Jasiri is much more closed off to Janja.  She’s playful and somewhat flirty towards him, but still has a dismissive and “haha losers” attitude towards him and his hyenas.  Here however, she is a lot more sympathetic and open towards him.  She’s lost the snarky and dismissive attitude she had in The Worst Hyena We Know and is just playful now.  This is because before, Janja only had those kinds of experiences with Jasiri and probably thought Jasiri would push him off a cliff if given the chance(given the fact that he was surprised that she saved him from a horrible death via falling into lava I don’t think this is a crazy conclusion to come to), but now, he knows that’s very not true.

There's even this neat part here where you can parallel the two songs and see the difference

[summercreolefanfictioner]

the scent wafts in, her name making him beg on his knees chap 2.3

pairing: dabi / todoroki touya x fem!oc / reader (MODERN AU)

chapter summary: the moment Touya delves into trouble, and it involved a certain woman and watching a romance movie with his new friends

themes: non-explicit nsfw, violence, alcoholism, cigarette smoking, toxic relationships, mental health, co-dependency and other related themes (YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED)

notes: wrting a bit about cheating and the lore of toxic relationships on this chap was a pain; and yes, no Himiko Toga's were harmed in this fic

"How did you know about this, Dabi-kun?" Himiko marveled at the sight from the backseat, curious eyes taking note of the parking lot that plays free romance movies every Saturday at 9 PM. One might think it was all cheesy and serving, but Touya knew it was a ploy for couples who wanted to get it on while the movie plays in the background. Basically, a place where you can legally have car sex, and no one would bat an eye.

"I just knew," Touya muttered, reaching behind the back to get some of the snacks they had bought earlier. Twice was somewhere far from the vehicles taking a cig, something about accidentally setting the place on fire if he took a smoke near engines.

Himiko blustered, "You took one of your exes here, I bet." There was a disgusted sound at the end as she rolled her eyes and folded her arms in her chest.

"If you knew the answer, then why bother asking?" Touya pointed out (it wasn't true; as if he would), arranging his rearview mirror to secretly check on the woman. So far, she was taking everything well. She wasn't looking at her phone like the expected paranoid girlfriend who still dates the same guy who cheats on her 24/7.

Himiko turned to the woman. "Hey, I'm Toga Himiko," she introduced, taking her hand in hers and rubbing her cheeks on it. "You're so pretty, do you know that? Does your boyfriend always tell you that?"

"I... Nice to meet you, T-Toga-chan," she meekly responded. "I'm..." she says her name, "Thank you."

Himiko was delighted at the sound of her name, a gasp following after. "You really are sooooo pretty, Sahara-chan!"

"It's..." Touya corrected, pronouncing her name per syllable. "Her name's not the famous desert, you brat."

Himiko only stuck out her tongue at him, ignoring his mocking tone as she focused again on the woman beside her. "Do you also like romance, Sahara-chan?" Himiko asked and said woman could hear Touya snorting at the foolish nickname. "I like romance. I like them, a lot, lot, LOT!"

"I... well... er—"

Before he could hear more of their girl talk, Touya already stepped out of the car and joined Twice to smoke. The movie was already playing out, the plot was something about a woman who fell in love with a married man and took solace in a place where she would do her penance for being his side piece. After smoking, they both returned to the car and saw both women engrossed in the movie.

"Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh," Himiko muttered excitedly, munching on her snacks as the woman watched quietly beside her. "What would happen to Prof. Kitano? Will he still be with Sawa? Oh no!"

Touya glanced at her briefly, noting how she was so focused on the film, especially on the Noriko character. In the film, Noriko is the professor's wife, and she can't fathom the fact that she is being pointed as the bad guy when her husband and his side piece are seeing each other again. She must've felt the scene so familiar to her like it was taken from a real-life experience. There was hurt in her eyes; fleeting, flying, leaving her all at once before she realized the reality she was in, finding Touya staring at her before quickly looking away.

When the credits rolled, Himiko was crying tears due to the bittersweet ending while the other was just comforting her. Twice and Touya realized two things: the movie was literally about the consequences of infidelity, and the fact that she has never once taken her phone out; not even to check if her boyfriend has called her or what.

"I can't believe you saved up to let that bitch watch a film about cheating," Touya commented.

"But Toga-chan wanted it!" Twice argued.

"Check movie ratings first before saving up, dumbass!"

Touya drove them back to the bar, with Twice and Himiko getting out before saluting Touya with the latter's signature middle finger. She was also about to open the door when he said, "I'll drive you home. Just tell me where it is."

"There's no need for that, umm?"

"Dabi."

"Yes, Dabi-kun. There's no need for that. My boyfriend is still inside. Maybe we could—"

Touya was running out of patience, slamming the door open and getting out of the car, slightly scaring her as he opened the door on her side and dragged her out by force, pulling her arm harshly and trapping her against the wall. It was the same position he saw her boyfriend in, thrusting his dick in and out of the cocktail server as he wrapped her legs around his waist. He was making her feel for herself that same disgust he saw.

He didn't know why she was the best target of his mockery tonight. There was just something about her, and he still couldn't figure it out.

"You knew what he was doing out there." He leaned close, almost whispering in her ear as she looked away, her hands in her chest like she was crossing her heart, and hoped this would not end as bad as it gets. "You knew who he laid his eyes on. Don't tell me he might still be there, you useless woman."

Touya expected her to cry, to hear her sniff and swallow her pride as he made a fool out of her. Women like her like to live in the delusion that their man who cheats so constantly will change their mind; that they will see the light and change their ways. They won't, unfortunately. It's what they get for believing sappy romance shits. It's the price they pay for an illusion that will never be.

But she didn't react the way someone like her would. She didn't budge. She didn't do what he wanted. She was just looking down, contemplating her next move as Touya was not taking his eyes off of hers.

"I know that very well. I... I am just glad you went out of your way to get me out there and tell me that you saw him, Dabi-kun," she mumbled, her heart still on her chest. "I really... really enjoyed today."

The fuck?

She sighed, finally looking up at him shyly as if reminiscing something. "Today was actually the day when we would celebrate my promotion, and I am happy that I went to the movies with you three instead."

Touya huffed, finally letting go of her and stepping away. So does that mean she's so used to it? Or maybe she allows him to play with other women? Wait. No. Nevermind. I shouldn't know the answer.

"My apartment's not far from here," she notified, finally sighing in relief. "I can walk from here. Thank you again, Dabi-kun. Please send my regards to Twice-san and Toga-chan."

She was about to walk away when Touya grabbed her arm. He should pull away slowly, should let her run to where she lives, and never return here.

You idiot.

"I'll still drive you," he murmured, feeling a bit guilty about his earlier behavior. He shouldn't meddle. He shouldn't be involved. He dragged her out there because he was bored, and nothing else. Her love problems are her own. They would never see each other again after this. This was just boredom, and he was hungry for entertainment. Yes, that was it. Nothing else.

"I want to."

Fuck boredom.

"Oh." She smiled softly at his offer. "Okay."

------

She really was just a few minutes walking distance from the bar, walking out of his car and almost bowing respectfully before he followed her and told her he'd walk her to her door. What a gentleman, he was, far from the Dabi who did not give a shit if the woman went home safe or not. He guessed he was weak for women like her. But like what exactly? What was so different about her?

Sure, she was really pretty, wearing his jacket over her tight dress as she tried to walk properly in her stilettos. But was it all it took for him to be like this? He didn't think so. Well, he'll find out anyway.

"Well, this is my unit," she announced then bowed to him. "Thank you again, Dabi-kun. Have a great night!"

And when he went in his car, her scent lingered there. The scent of fresh laundry and morning spring. She might be near the area, but there was no way, she would appear in the bar again.

Until he saw her cardholder in the backseat of his car and realized she was still holding onto his favorite jacket.

ps. Himiko and the woman were watching Hirugao the movie (not safe for minors in Japan ya know)

next chapter

masterlist

[vestaclinicpod]

Audio Drama Sunday - 14th April ✨

Oh my god, the audio sure did drama this week!!  

👻 @tellnotalespod (S2E7.5) HOW did none of us put this together sooner?! Oh my god, what an absolutely INCREDIBLE little twist. I love the undercurrent of hopeful resilience in Tell No Tales (Leo is going to get with the programme really soon 🤞) and I am screaming, crying and throwing up imagining the end of season reunion 😭 HOWEVER, don’t think I missed for a second that Riley is asking for another packet of painkillers . . . it would be so like him to think that 16 paracetamol is two doses of paracetamol but still! He needs to be okay!!

🌲 @hellofromthehallowoods (147) hhhhh what a GOOD episode. There’s something different about the horror of season 4 that I want someone with a literature degree to talk to me about for hours. Can we please talk about how the murder victim had a treble clef carved into them . . . i.e. the symbol at the start of a piece of music. It’S SO CLEVER I love the intricate details of this show!!!!! And, can we also talk about how emotional I feel about Clem (namer of everything) is in love with Shelby (has a cat named Cat). There’s something in that which is giving me palpitations. 

🦀 @thesiltverses (39) You wouldn’t think one would be happy to have silt in their ears, but I am!! I’ve missed this story so much and I loved the twist in this episode. Carson has practically wrapped Shrue in a bow and handed them to Carpenter and Hayward. I can’t WAIT for that conversation. 

🧳 Travelling Light @monstrousproductions (17) Oh this is so beautiful! Do humans do this with ice?? I think we should 1000% do this with ice! I don’t have voting privileges (yet 💸) but I think they should go easy on their foes in the snowball fight. I would love to see how adorably smug Óli is if allowed to win 🥺

🤴 Inco @itmeblog (S3E20-34) If anyone takes SAWA away from Nova again I am going to throw HANDS. I’ve always considered SAWA to be endearingly overbearing with her prompts to Nova but we got such a good glimpse of how vital she is in the library/archives and I love her 😭

♦️@grottopod (8) Grotto finale! I loved the music at the start of this episode and it was so satisfying to hear David get to express some of his frustrations. Season two sounds like it’s going to be wild. 

⚔️ @camlannpod (7) This episode KILLED me. Here are the quotes that made me scream: “GWEN: You can’t love the mental illness out of someone.”  (10/10, true, valid, hurts) “PERRY: Eat a dick, Kay.” (11/10 the crowd goes WILD) “RHIANNON: (calling to the group as they leave) Cousin. About your lover. You didn’t fail him. You just needed more time.” (1/10 OW?????? OW OW WHY? OW!!!!) “MORGAN: You’re just as bad as Arthur. Worse. At least he was honest about it.” (??/10 JAW ON THE FLOOR) I need this podcast forever 🥺

🖥️ The Magnus Protocol (11) Oooh I liked this episode!! I love it when you’re left to fill in the blanks in a horror story - my mind is still whirring through so many awful scenarios. 

🍎 @notquitedeadpod (XXXIV-XXXV) ah! I’ve accidentally caught up to Not Quite Dead! What will my Sunday afternoons look like now?? There were so many moments in these eps which made me laugh but I’m mostly just so in awe of how complex and real these characters are. Neige genuinely feels 10000 years old and shaped by the trauma of each of them. I need to check the release schedule because I cannot wait for more!! 

Have a good week of listening, everyone! 🌈

[callmebrycelee]

9-1-1 REACTION

After last week’s 100th episode, I am back with a reaction to our latest episode. I do want to acknowledge my last reaction got a bit wordy so it’s my goal to keep things nice and tight. Like Lou Ferrigno Jr.'s body. Okay, focus! Ahem. This reaction is for the season 7, fifth episode “You Don’t Know Me” which originally aired April 11, 2024. The episode was written by Lyndsey Beaulieu and Taylor Wong and directed by Brenna Mallow. Spoilers ahead!

“I’m the boss of me.” – Terry and audience

We begin the episode in a hotel conference room where speaker Terry (played by John Milhiser) is talking to a small audience about the importance of having self-control. He tells his captive audience the secret to self-control is one simple thing; however, before he can reveal that simple thing, his right hand seizes up and starts going all Devon Sawa in Idle Hands on Terry. The audience is aghast as Terry starts beating the shit out of himself. It would be hilarious if it wasn’t so horrifying. 

Cue title card.

“Get it off!” – Eddie Diaz, to anyone who will listen

The 118 arrive on the scene and find Terry slapping himself. Hen reminds us that once upon a time she went to med school and suggests Terry is suffering from something called alien hand syndrome. Eddie doesn’t believe such a thing exists but Hen schools him by explaining that it’s a rare neurological condition that causes a person’s limbs to act out, seemingly of their own will. This condition usually indicates urgent brain danger. Bobby tells Buck and Eddie to restrain Terry while Hen and Chimney prepare to administer some lorazepam and lidocaine. Buck and Eddie struggle to restrain the guy which is funny considering they’re both big dudes and this guy doesn’t seem like he would be that strong. Hen asks Terry if he’s recently been treated for epilepsy or blood clots. He tells her no and Chimney asks if he’s been treated for an irregular heartbeat. Terry tells him he had an operation four weeks ago for his AFib. Hen thinks it’s possible his heart has grown a blood clot that went to his brain. Basically, Terry is having a stroke and it’s imperative they get him to the hospital immediately before there’s any brain damage. 

Terry’s hand reaches for Buck’s throat and starts choking him. Bobby manages to pry his hand off Buck’s throat, but it immediately grabs Eddie’s (ahem) privates. Yup, you read that correctly. Terry’s hand gropes Eddie’s package. Eddie is basically S.A.-ed in a room full of people. Bobby pries his hand off, again, and Eddie collapses to the floor. The hand goes for Buck’s throat again and Chimney sneaks in to administer the lidocaine which numbs Terry’s arm and hand. At this point, Buck’s face is beet-red, and his eyes are bulging out. Terry goes to apologize to Buck and Eddie, but neither are very receptive to his apology. 

“How perfect is this little face?” – Karen Wilson, to Maddie Buckley

We head over to the Buckley-Han residence where Maddie and Chimney are giving some of Jee-Yun’s baby clothes to Hen and Karen who are excited about the arrival of a new foster child. Karen gets a call from the social worker asking to meet with them. When they meet with Dierdra (played by Andi Chapman) she tells them the little girl they were planning on fostering is being taken in by her grandmother. What I like most about this scene, it shows how much Hen and Karen have grown since the whole Nia situation back in season 3. They’re disappointed about not being able to foster the little girl, but Hen says that at least the girl gets to stay with her family. 

Dierdra tells them there’s another girl who needs a home but she’s older. Both the girl’s parents are deceased and she’s currently living in a group home which is not an ideal living situation for a 9-year-old. Dierdra tells Hen and Karen that this girl is very special, and she wants her to have a fighting chance at having a good life. She believes her best chance is with Hen and Karen. Hen looks at Karen who gives her a look that indicates her interest in giving this child a home. Hen asks Dierdra when she and Karen will get to meet her. 

“I’m an ally. Every Pride Month, I put a rainbow on my Instagram.” – Evan Buckley, to Tommy Kinard

Meanwhile, Buck and Tommy (played by Lou Ferrigno Jr.) go out on their first date. While Tommy pays their bill, Buck asks him what time the movie starts. Tommy tells him the movie theater has 18 screens so they can pick a movie when they get there. Buck glances around the restaurant, nervously, and Tommy assures him that no one is looking at them. I love that Tommy is one of the only characters in the show who calls him Evan. Tommy reminds him that no one cares that they’re having dinner together. Buck, of course, plays coy, and Tommy tells him he’s a little tense. He tells Buck that he gets it. The two of them are in a pretty macho line of work,. He tells Buck that he’d be surprised by how accepting most people are. 

Buck asks Tommy if he’s always been out at work. Tommy tells him ‘no’ and says that the 118 was a pretty regressive place back when it was under the leadership of Captain Gerrard. Tommy says that back then he was still figuring himself out. When he transferred to Harbor, he stopped lying about who he was. Buck says he’s not lying about who he is and Tommy says he didn’t say Buck was. He was talking about himself. Buck tells Tommy this is his first date with a guy but assures him he’s not weirded out. I cackled when Buck told Tommy he was an ally and that he posts a rainbow on his Instagram during Pride Month. Tommy says that it must be him that makes Buck nervous. 

“Evan, I think you’re adorable.” – Tommy Kinard, to Evan Buckley

Their conversation is interrupted by the arrival of Eddie and his girlfriend, Marisol (played by Edy Ganem). Eddie greets them both, very loudly, and is excited to see his two friends hanging out. Tommy tells them they just had dinner and are on their way to see a movie. Buck says that afterwards they’re going to go pick up hot chicks because women like firefighters. Eddie, of course, is oblivious and makes a comment about Marisol being a hot chick and finding her firefighter. I don’t know who’s cringier in this scene – Buck or Eddie. Eddie tells Buck and Tommy that Marisol agreed to move in with him and they both tell him congratulations. Marisol makes a comment about moving her armoire into Eddie’s house and he says that you can never have too much closet space. Tommy says, ain’t that the truth – right, Evan? I hollered!!!! Buck looks like he wants to disappear. Eddie and Marisol leave, and Tommy asks if Buck’s ready to go. Buck says yes. Outside, Tommy orders a Lyft just for himself. He tells Buck he’s going to skip the movie. When Buck asks why, Tommy tells him that he doesn’t think Buck is ready. Before he gets in the car, he tells Buck he’ll see him around. I felt so bad for Buck in this scene, but I totally understand where Tommy is coming from.

“Can we go back to the pronoun?” – Maddie Buckley, to Evan Buckley

Dierdra introduces Hen, Karen, and Denny to a Mara Driskell (played by Askyler Bell). Mara is non-verbal and seems withdrawn. Hen tells her to make herself at home and Denny gives her his favorite teddy bear. Meanwhile, Buck goes to see Maddie and tells her about his date. He describes his date in vague terms which leads Maddie to believe he’s seeing a married woman. Buck says he’s not seeing a married woman and tells her he feels guilty for lying to Eddie. Maddie asks him why he did it and Buck says he doesn’t know. Buck tells her that his date left him standing outside the restaurant. Maddie picks up on the specific pronoun he used to describe his date and to Buck’s credit, he tells her he was on a date with a guy. 

Maddie is so supportive in this scene which I knew she’d been. In fact, I don’t think anyone is going to have a problem with Buck being interested in men. Maddie asks him how long it’s been since he’s been leaning in the other direction. He tells her he hasn’t been leaning in that direction; however, he will, from time to time, check out a hot guy’s ass. Buck considers this normal behavior, and you know what, I agree with him. We should all, regardless of who were are attracted to, take the time to check out a hot guy’s ass. Buck tells his sister about Tommy. I thought it was so cute when Buck lists all the things he finds attractive about Tommy Kinard. He’s confident, interesting, and no one has a swell cleft in his chin like Gaston Tommy. Maddie asks if this is the same Tommy who is Eddie’s friend. Buck gets defensive and reminds her that Tommy is a recent friend that he and Eddie most definitely met at the same time. I love when Buck gets jealous. Maddie tells Buck that she doesn’t think he’s a fraud and she follows that up with some amazing, sisterly advice. She reminds him that he’s still processing these new feelings and when he’s ready to tell Eddie the truth, he will do it in his own time.  We end the scene with Maddie asking Buck to tell her more about the hot pilot.

“You’re not gonna spank me with a ruler, are you?” – Eddie Diaz, to Marisol

We next head over to the Diaz residence where we see Eddie and Marisol in bed together presumably after sexytimes. I found this transition jarring because we haven’t seen this side of Eddie since season 2. It’s so funny to me that Ryan Guzman is one of this show’s sex symbols, but we rarely get intimate scenes with his character. In fact, all of the other characters have been shown to have very active and satisfying sex lives within the show. Even Bobby and Athena like to mix it up with some roleplay from time to time. Anywho, Marisol heads into the bathroom to take the world’s fastest shower while Eddie snoops through her things. He finds a crucifix and a photo of her in a nun’s habit. He asks her when she was a nun for Halloween. Marisol exits the bathroom wearing a towel and tells him the photo was taken when she was with the Sisters of the Holy Order. She passes off this information like it’s the most normal explanation in the world before heading back into the bathroom. He asks he if she was really a month and she lets him know she only made it to novice and never took her final vows. Eddie tells her he’s having flash backs to being back in middle school. He asks if he she plans on spanking him with a ruler and she jokes that she’ll only do that if he asks nicely. When Marisol leaves the bathroom this time, Eddie sees her dressed in a habit with a celestial glow around her. Yeah, Buck may be dealing with his sexuality, but our boy Eddie has some good old-fashioned Catholic guilt.

“Is something wrong?” – Karen Wilson, to Mara Driskell

Back over at the Wilsons, Karen helps Mara get ready for bed. As she goes to leave the room, she finds the bear that Denny gave Mara lying on the floor with its head ripped off. Karen is rightfully disturbed by this and quickly exits the room. Later on, Karen wakes up to find Mara standing at the end of her bed. She wakes Hen up and they ask if something is wrong. Mara just stands there and glares at them in the creepiest way. Hen gets up and tells Mara she will go back to her room with her. When she goes to put her hand on Mara’s shoulder, the child starts screaming bloody murder which wakes Denny up. Hen and Karen exchange horrified looks.

“So, she dropped out of nun school?” – Evan Buckley, to Eddie Diaz

The next day, Buck walks into work, looking nervous and trepidatious. He sees Eddie at the bench-press and heads over to talk to him. He starts things off by telling Eddie he’s there early. Eddie says he’s been there since 6:00 even though their shift doesn’t start till 9:00. Eddie tells Buck he left the house early to avoid having sex with Marisol. Eddie asks Buck if his family was very religious when he was growing up which, no offense to the writers, seems like a conversation they would’ve maybe had by now considering how close they are. Buck says they were Episcopalian so basically no. I laughed at this line because I’ve always thought of Episcopalian as diet Catholicism. Many of the same rituals without all the pomp and pageantry. Eddie says he comes from Latin Catholics which apparently is even more hardcore than regular Catholics. Rosary beads. Catholic schools. Confessions. Mass every Sunday. He tells Buck he went until he was old enough to let tell his parents it wasn’t for him. Eddie calls himself as a Manchurian Catholic with a reservoir of Catholic guilt lying dormant just waiting to be activated. 

Eddie goes on to say that everything was going great with Marisol moving in until he found out she was a nun. Buck’s follow-up question to hearing all of this is asking if she wears the outfit meaning the nun’s habit. Eddie explains that she’s not a nun currently, but she was once upon a time. Buck asks if she dropped out or was expelled. Eddie says that Marisol left of her own volition. Buck asks him what the problem is. Eddie says the problem is that he can’t look at her without wanting to do the Sign of the Cross instead of … other things. Eddie says he hasn’t been able to get a boner since she told him which explains why he’s so pent up. Buck tells him that Episcopalians don’t have guilt which is something he doesn’t exactly feel great about and suggests that Eddie appeal to a higher power. Eddie asks Buck if he thinks he should go to confession. Buck tells him ‘no’ and says he thinks he should go talk to Bobby since he’s a practicing Catholic. Eddie thinks this is a good idea since Bobby has never made him feel judged. He tells Buck that’s good advice. He goes to leave but pauses. He turns to Buck and says that it looked like he wanted to tell him something when he walked in. Buck lies and says he was just going to see if needed someone to spot him. 

“One minute, Denny’s setting the table and the next, he’s bleeding.” – Karen Wilson, to Hen Wilson

Upstairs, Bobby brings Hen coffee. She tells him she need a handful of ibuprofen. He asks her if she has a headache, she tells him she has an everything ache. He asks her how thing are going with Mara, and she tells him that something happened to her. Before she got to Hen and Karen. Hen tells him that Mara had an episode the previous night. A night terror. She tells Bobby that she’s been with a day and a night but so far hasn’t spoken a single word. Bobby tells her that once Mara feels safe, she will eventually open up. Hen gets a text from Karen with a photo of Denny. Denny had a bruise over his right eye and the two of them are at the emergency room. Hen gets up and tells Bobby she needs to call Karen.

She learns that during breakfast, Mara chucked a coffee mug at Denny’s head. Hen asks if Denny is okay, and Karen says that he swears he’s fine. Denny tells Karen and Hen that Mara didn’t mean to hurt him which is awfully mature of him to say. Hen starts freaking out and asking about x-rays and stitches and checking for a concussion. Karen lets her know she is handling things. Hen apologizes and says she wishes she was there. Hen asks how all of this happened and Karen tells her she thinks it’s because Denny moved her blanket. Hen tells Karen that she’ll be home soon and when she gets there they have a lot to talk about. Karen agrees. When Hen gets home, the two of them make a phone call to Dierdra.

“I’m not gonna tell you how you feel about Marisol, Eddie. Only you know that.” – Bobby Nash, to Eddie Diaz

Meanwhile, back at the 118, Eddie shows Bobby a photo of Marisol wearing her nun’s habit. Bobby says that Marisol doesn’t look like any of the nuns he had back when he was in Minnesota. Bobby tells Eddie he understands why he’s unnerved by the knowledge that Marisol used to be a nun. He says that the imagery from their faith is very powerful. Eddie says he’s not sure if he can say that it is their faith. He tells Bobby he doesn’t know what he believes in anymore. Bobby reminds him that a lapsed Catholic is still a Catholic. He wonders if Eddie’s reaction is just him having second thoughts about Marisol moving in with him. He says that Eddie hasn’t talked about Marisol in a way that would make Bobby think he was considering cohabitating with her. Eddie tells Bobby that he really likes Marisol. Bobby tells Eddie he remembers the last time he said something similar. It was about Ana and he tells Eddie that shortly thereafter he started having panic attacks. Eddie asks Bobby if he thinks he’s a commitment-phobe. Bobby says he doesn’t think that’s the case considering Eddie has no problem committing to other things like the military, being a firefighter, his son, and Shannon. Eddie tells Bobby that the Church is a lot of the reason why he and Shannon got married. When she got pregnant, they both felt pressured into getting married. Eddie says that he’s never regretted marrying Shannon. Even when things got really bad, there was a part of him that loved being married to her. Bobby tells Eddie that only he knows how he feels about Marisol. Eddie asks Bobby what he would do if he were in his position. Bobby says as a practicing, confession-going Catholic he would go to confession because he wouldn’t want to piss off Marisol’s ex … the Lord. 

“I was supposed to take care of her. She was finally supposed to be safe with me.” – Cynthia, to Hen Wilson

In our next scene, the 118 respond to an emergency involving a structure fire and a firefighter named Brunson who has been bitten by the homeowner’s dog. While Chimney sees to Brunson (played by Anthony Starke), the homeowner Cynthia (played by Sandra Thigpen) explains that the dog is a rescue who was once used for fighting. She is more upset about the dog being trapped inside her home which is currently on fire than she is her home. Brunson says he’s sorry he couldn’t get the dog out of the house and Cynthia apologizes for her dog biting him. Hen, being an avid animal lover, goes to check on the dog after she’s carried out of the house by another fireman. She detects movement and begins administering compressions to the dog. Okay, so maybe I’m late to the party but I didn’t know CPR worked on dogs. The dog regains consciousness and Cynthia is so happy. Brunson says to Hen that she doesn’t give up and Chimney tells him that giving up is not in her vocabulary. 

“Everybody’s given up on her. I don’t want to be another name in a long list of people who have failed her.” – Hen Wilson, to Athena Grant

Hen goes to see Athena who has done some digging into Mara’s background. They learn that Mara’s parents were high school sweethearts who have criminal records going all the way back to when they were teenagers. They were both into drugs which ultimately led to their demise. They both died on the same night due to an opioid overdose. They’d been dead several hours by the time paramedics arrived. Hen asks Athena how the paramedics found them. Athena tells her someone called 911. 

Hen and Karen head over to the 911 dispatch center to see Maddie. I love how we keep getting more scenes between these Maddie and Hen. I would argue that we’ve seen Hen and Maddie together more in just this season alone than the other seasons combined. Maddie plays the 911 call from the night Mara’s parents overdosed. At first no one responds to the dispatcher but eventually Mara starts talking. Mara tells him that her parents went to sleep and now they will not wake up. It was absolutely heartbreaking listening to Mara tell the dispatcher that she couldn’t feel her parents breathing. She tells him that sometimes her parents take pills that make them sleepy but they always wakeup. She wonders why they aren’t waking up this time. She begs for them to wake up. When the recording ends, Hen realizes aloud that Mara wasn’t just watching her and Karen sleep. She was worried they weren’t going to wake up. Karen says she was trying to protect them. I mean that still doesn’t make what she did to Denny okay but at least we have an explanation as to why she’s acting out and not speaking to anyone.

Eddie heads over to Buck’s to avoid going home to his own place. Buck tells him he’s going to have to go home at some point. Eddie asks if he has to. Buck reminds him that’s where he and his son lives. Eddie says that Christopher is away for the next couple of days. Speaking of Christopher, I was hoping that with him being a main part of the cast now that we’d see him more this season. Maybe he’ll factor in towards the latter half of the season. Anywho, Eddie is worried that if he goes home, Marisol will want to have sex with him. Buck tells him he’ll get through it. Eddie is worried about God watching them knock boots and Buck asks him if God was watching before Eddie learned about Marisol being a nun. Eddie says that he’s going to have to break up with her. Buck asks him if that is what he wants. Eddie says no and reminds Buck that he just asked Marisol to move in with him. He tells Buck that he and Tommy have the right idea staying single and hanging out with the boys. Oh, Eddie. You don’t know the half of it. 

“This doesn’t change a thing between us. Okay?” – Eddie Diaz, to Evan Buckley

Buck finally comes clean and tells Eddie he was on a date with Tommy. Eddie is shocked that Tommy’s gay which is funny to me because one would think his first thought would be, wow, Buck, you’re bisexual? Buck figured that Tommy’s sexuality would’ve come up at some point while they were hanging out. Eddie says Tommy hasn’t said anything to him, not that it would matter. Buck says that Tommy doesn’t volunteer his sexuality, but he doesn’t hide it. Buck asks Eddie if it’s weird that he and Tommy were on a date and Eddie says absolutely not. Eddie tells Buck that nothing will change between the two of them and Buck is visibly relieved by hearing this. Buck tells him that Tommy dumped him but then remembers that he can’t be dumped if they were never together. Buck tells him that Tommy doesn’t think he’s ready to be in a relationship with a guy. Eddie asks him what he thinks. Buck says he can’t stop thinking about Tommy. Eddie tells Buck he needs to call Tommy. Eddie reminds him that Tommy doesn’t know he’s an idiot but once he does get to know him, he’ll love Buck – like they all do. But what if he says no, Buck asks. Then he’s an idiot, Eddie says. Eddie tells him not to walk away from something before he even knows what it is. Buck echoes what Eddie said earlier in the episode and tells him that’s good advice. Eddie agrees and tells Buck he needs to talk to Marisol. He gets up and heads to the door. Before he leaves, he tells Buck to come here, and the two besties hug it out. This scene was so precious. I love the chemistry between these two. I’m still not 100% sold on them being anything other than friends but I can see why others would see a scene like this and ship these two romantically. Before Eddie leaves, he reminds Buck to call Tommy. If only you could be as good of a boyfriend as you are a friend, Eddie. You would be as close to perfect as a person could get. 

“Because no man has ever looked at me the same after they found out.” – Marisol, to Eddie Diaz

Eddie finally makes it back to his house right about the same time Marisol gets there. He apologizes for not coming home sooner. He asks her if she’s had anything to eat and she tells him she ate with her brother. This made me laugh because I’ve seen people on Reddit and Tumblr joke about how Marisol has more chemistry with her brother than she does with Eddie. Anywho, Marisol tells Eddie they should talk and he agrees. She tells him she have told him sooner about being a nun. He asks her why she didn’t, and she tells him that whenever she tells a guy about her past, one of two things happen. Either they get freaked out or turned on. Eddie suggests there may be a third option – the kind of guy who just needs a minute. Marisol tells him if he’s not ready for them to cohabitate, she understands. Eddie tells her he doesn’t think he’s ready for them to leave together … yet. He tells her something about him. He confesses that he has the tendency to move too fast in his relationships. He goes with his gut and lets his head catch up later. Marisol asks if that usually works out for him and he tells her no. However, this time he would really like it if it did. Eddie asks Marisol if they can start over, and she says yes. This time he wants them to take time getting to know each other. They kiss and Marisol says she can’t wait to move out. Eddie says he can’t wait either.

“Night, night.” – Mara, to Karen Wilson

At the Wilson residence, Karen goes into Mara’s room to talk to her. She says she can’t imagine how hard it is for her being in a new house with strangers. Karen says she would be scared all the time which is how she knows Mara is a very brave girl. Karen tells Mara she doesn’t have to be brave all the time. She tells her she is safe there with her, Hen, and Denny – even if she doesn’t feel like she is. She gives Mara a monitor so she can see that Karen and Hen are there and know that she is safe. She tells Mara goodnight and tells her goodnight. Hen and Karen are delighted to hear this.

“I don’t know what I’m ready for, but I am ready for something. And I think maybe that something could be with you.” – Evan Buckley, to Tommy Kinard

The next day, Buck meet up with Tommy. They exchange hellos and Buck thanks Tommy for agreeing to meet him. He tells Tommy he got him a coffee. He didn’t know how he took his coffee, so he just guessed. Tommy takes a sip and says, not like that. I love how honest Tommy is. It’s what I find so endearing about him. They both laugh and Buck says there’s a lot of things they don’t know about each other. Tommy says practically everything. Buck wants to change that but first he apologizes for how he behaved on their date. Tommy assures him he has nothing to apologize for, but Buck says he does. Tommy tells him no again and explains that he didn’t cut their date short because Buck behaved badly. He cut it short because he didn’t want to pressure Buck. Buck admits that how he acted is not one of his proudest moments. Buck brings up how Tommy said he wasn’t ready. He tells Tommy that he doesn’t know what he’s ready for but he is ready for something. He believes that maybe that something could be with Tommy. Tommy says that Buck already knows he’s interested. Buck invites him to come to Maddie’s wedding. Tommy laughs but quickly realizes that Buck is serious. Buck tells him that he wants him to be his date. When Tommy said Evan, I swooned. Buck tells him that he already knows half the people that will be at the wedding and says that Maddie is eager to meet him. I love how Tommy is always checking to make sure Buck is okay with everything they are doing. He asks Buck if he’s sure and Buck says he is. He tells Tommy he’ll need someone to dance with. Tommy says okay. They hold hands and Buck looks so happy I could just scream.  “What was it, pastel and puke?” – Maddie Buckley, to Evan Buckley and Eddie Diaz

In our final scene, we flash-forward to Maddie and Chimney’s wedding. We see Athena looking absolutely radiant seated next to Bobby. We see Maddie in her wedding dress freaking out over Chimney, Buck, and Eddie being a half an hour late. Maddie’s dad (played by Gregory Harrison) is trying to call Buck but keeps getting his voicemail. Hen arrives in looking absolutely stunning in a black tux. She tells Maddie that Buck’s car just pulled up. Maddie is relieved and asks if Chimney is with them. Hen tells her she isn’t sure. She didn’t see. Buck and Eddie arrive looking like something the proverbial cat drug in. I love their pastel blazer. Eddie’s in a pink suit with no shirt on for some reason. Not that I’m complaining. Buck has on all white with a green blazer. Maddie asks them why they’re dressed like that. Buck says they were at a themed party. Eddie says the puke on his jacket isn’t his. Maddie tells them to get changed and asks them about Chimney. Buck tells her it’s complicated. 

Wow, what another incredible episode. I like how the theme of not knowing someone carried out throughout the episode. This season continues to deliver on the character development front. Some have complained that there’s not enough emergencies this season, but I don’t care. I’ve always preferred the drama of the characters over the actual emergencies. I think the show does a good job of balancing those two things. Hell, it’s only been five episodes and we’ve dealt with a drunk driver, an airplane crashing into a house, a cruise ship capsizing and a guy going ape shit on himself. That’s plenty of emergency for me. 

Speaking of balance, I think the show is doing a good job of balancing our main characters’ storyline. The first three episodes dealt with Athena and Buck. The last two episodes have been about Buck, Hen, and Eddie. I feel like the next episodes will deal with Maddie and Chimney. Speaking of Buck, I am very pleased with the direction his character is going. I was watching an episode from season one and it’s remarkable how far he’s come since then. The same goes with Hen. In season one, I wasn’t sure if her relationship with Karen was going to go the distance but here we are seven years later and they’re still together, better than ever, and fostering kids in addition to raising Denny. Then we have Eddie. I am so happy Bobby called him out on his bullshit. I’ve watched people online make excuses for Eddie’s behavior while pointing the finger at Shannon. I’ve never understood how people could be so angry at Shannon for leaving Christopher but turn a blind eye to the fact that Eddie has openly admitted to signing up for another tour of duty because he wasn’t ready to deal with being a husband and a father. Having Marisol move out is a good decision although I wish he never asked her to move in to begin with. It creates more baggage for her. Hopefully, Eddie will take additional steps to figure out why he sucks at relationships. It's so funny to me because I see so many folks online who swear up and down that Eddie and Buck are going to be together by the end of this season. Yet, none of them have ever taken the time to consider that if Eddie is bad with Shannon, Ana, and now with Marisol, why would things be any different with Buck? Also, I do not want Eddie to interfere with Buck’s bisexual awakening. In fact, outside of them being just two friends supporting each other, I would like to see them embark on their separate journeys alone and maybe rely on others for advice. 

Well, unfortunately it looks like we will not be getting a new episode until May 2nd. I checked my calendar and May 2nd isn’t as far away as I thought. Having 9-1-1 on a brief hiatus will allow me some time to revisit some older episodes and rewatch the five episodes from this season. The thing about 9-1-1, much like Golden Girls and Schitt’s Creek, it will never get old to me. So, maybe I’ll start at the very beginning (again) so I can better appreciate how far our beloved characters have come. Until next time …

[jichanxo]

re: senseific, i don't remember if you've talked about it, but i was a little bit surprised that it was sawa who suggested kitakata as an advisor for amasawa. yeah it's been 13 years, and in the game their relationship is not particularly hostile, but i still wait from her the "fuck that guy" attitude towards him xD speaking of (and this, of course it doubtly would be The Theme, but will you talk about their relationship or just mention that stuff happened and they got over it? or not at all?

you all know the drill ↓

Considering the outcome of the Kusumoto situation in sensei au, I don’t think her feelings towards him would be so negative. He mishandled the situation at first, sure, but he realised it was serious, and I think he did everything he could to make things right. Of course, effort alone isn’t enough to make up for all the awful things that already happened because of him, but it must count for something, right? Kitakata was willing to admit he was wrong, presumably apologised, took responsibility, put in the work. I think Sawa sees that. That he’s flawed but ultimately sincere and trying.

Her impression of Kitakata isn’t wholly positive – she’s levelheaded and sees his flaws very clearly, especially now as his colleague (he’s prone to mess and disorganisation, and I see him as being kind of lazy and inconsiderate at times in his day to day). He perhaps doesn’t deserve her respect, and Sawa is definitely the better teacher, but I think her presence helps hold Kitakata to account. She expects quite a bit of him, and Kitakata knows this, wants to be the person that she expects him to be. Kitakata’s wish to change and do better is sincere, but I think he might slip back into old habits if he wasn’t diligent, and Sawa’s presence helps.

She certainly expects Kitakata to at least hear a student out when they go to speak to him, and she’s known him long enough to notice him with a mystery novel or two. Why not ask him to help the mrc? ...well, I dunno. I’m not married to the idea. But that’s the train of thought.

I don’t know how in depth I’ll go with those two, mostly because I’m approaching the Sawa-Kitakata relationship from the angle of Yagami seeing that there’s something going on there, but not knowing exactly what. So for the most part, it’s not going to be something that’s spoken about outright. But their relationship is interesting and I think it speaks especially to Kitakata’s personal motivations and shortcomings in a way that can’t be done any other way.

[afi-writes]

Of All the Women He Could Have

Pairing: Ikki x MC

Rating: Teen and up

Summary: The heroine spends the girls ’evening with Sawa and Mine when she gets a call from Ikki, who is home alone.

Written for @cresu 💙♠︎

"So, how is it like?" Mine asks, staring at me over her glass. She sits cross-legged on a pillow in her pajamas.

Sawa, browsing on her phone, looks up and glances at the two of us in turn. My hands shake and I hurriedly put the glass I am holding down on the table.

"What do you mean?"

"You know, senpai," Mine replies, her lips curving into a smile as a dangerous gleam comes into her eyes. "Sex with Ikki. I never got my turn, so I at least want to know the facts."

Heat races up my neck to my cheeks in a second, and my heart leaps to pound in my throat. I squeeze the pillow under me and wonder how I can avoid answering. It has been two weeks since Ikki said he would seduce me into his bed in a month, but I have not given in yet. What if he does not like me? He has so much more experience, and I certainly do not know how to please him. There are other women who... know what kind of things Ikki likes.

But I cannot say that to Mine and Sawa. I just cannot!

"Mine, that's a totally inappropriate question," says Sawa.

"There's nothing wrong with a little sharing..."

"You can't just ask people that."

Sawa and Mine's argument continues but does not quite reach my ears. Mine's question keeps rolling around in my mind and leaves a warm feeling in my stomach. I would not like to think about it so much but on the other hand I cannot help thinking about it.

"Senpai, your phone is ringing."

Mine's words penetrate my thoughts, and I realize she is right. My gaze glues itself to the name flickering on the screen.

Ikki.

Why is Ikki calling me?

"Aren't you going to answer?" Sawa asks.

I slip the phone into my hand and glance around.

"You can go talk on the balcony," Sawa continues, already handing me a jacket, which I grab.

I slip out, wrap myself in the jacket and finally press the icon for the answering. It is amazing how long Ikki kept on calling. I would probably have given up by now. The autumn air tingles my cheeks as I lean against the wall and lift the phone to my ear.

"You answered."

His voice is as soft as ever, but with a heavier tone than usual. It falls right into my stomach, which starts to tingle.

"I'm sorry. I was talking to Sawa and Mine," I say. "Weren't you supposed to spend tonight with Kent?"

"He left a while ago..."

I smile in response. I can picture in my mind how Ikki and Kent have been joking with each other all evening, and maybe Kent brought Ikki a new math puzzle to solve. I am sure they had a great time.

"Listen..." Ikki breathes into the phone. "I'd love to have you home..."

"I... I can leave. I'm sure Sawa and Mine will understand."

"No... Don't. I can't promise you now that you'll be safe if you come home..."

"Have you been drinking, Ikki?"

A deep sigh brushes my ear and raises my skin hairs. I recognize that voice. I thought Ikki had already let go of the ghosts of his past. I forgave him for his rude behavior, and he put his fan club in check. There is nothing to be upset about now, but...

"We had a few with Kent. Now that I'm alone, I miss you so much I almost cannot breathe."

I chew my bottom lip and lift my gaze to the dark night sky. I would make the last train if I left now. On the other hand, I have promised a girls' night to Sawa and Mine, because the next opportunity probably will not come for anytime soon, due to the pressures of studying and work. I have been so wrapped up in my own affairs lately that I have not given my friends enough of my time.

"I just wanted to hear your voice," Ikki continues. "Talk about something, anything."

"Mine asked how it is like with you..."

I slap a hand over my mouth as soon as I have blurted out the first thought that came to mind. Why? Why did I say that to Ikki? His laugh makes my knees buckle. If I have been able to resist his eyes before, I could not help the pull of his heavy voice.

"What did you answer?"

"I didn't."

"Why not?"

"You know why."

Another chuckle, and I hear a rustle in the background. The same kind of rustle I have heard a few nights, when Ikki have been rolling over on his own futon next to me.

"Didn't you want to reveal to Mine that I still haven't succeeded in my goal? That I still haven't managed to seduce my princess into my bed?"

I do not know what to say. My cheeks are getting hot again, despite the cool night.

"You know it's only a matter of time, right? Maybe tomorrow I'll succeed..."

"Tomorrow?"

"Yes. When you get home, I'll kiss you immediately. I'll take off your jacket and press you against the hallway wall. I'll keep kissing you until your lips are turning sensitive..."

I press myself tighter against the balcony wall and cannot help the breath that escapes my lips.

"Ikki, that's... a little..."

"Next, I'll kiss your neck. I run my lips along the skin and catch your earlobe between them. I might even nibble a little..."

Ikki has clearly had too much to drink. He is not usually quite so outspoken. But I can imagine everything he says. He has kissed my neck before. Lightly and gently. Finally, he licked me and made me whine.

"You know I won't do anything you don't really want. But you do want me to take off every piece of your clothing in that hallway... Undo the buttons of your dress and drain it off your shoulders, let it fall to your ankles. And when you're in front of me in your underwear, I'll kiss your belly button..."

"Ikki..."

"Yes...?"

"Sawa and Mine are waiting for me back inside."

"Don't you want to know what happens next?"

I swallow and cannot answer. My cheeks are on fire, I am on fire all over.

"I think you want..."

Still the words are a mere whisper, but they still make my skin crawl. I press my free hand against the cold wall and try to calm my heart, pounding against my chest.

"I kiss your belly as I gently pull down your pantyhose. Once I've taken them off, I scoop you into my arms and carry you to the bed. I'd like to do it right now, if only you were here..."

The last word brushes against my ear in a sigh. There is a hot, vaguely shaped lump in my lower abdomen, spreading lower. My breathing sounds as heavy to my own ears as Ikki's sighs.

"We can spend all night tomorrow when you get home. We're in no hurry to go anywhere. I'll go just as slowly as you wish..."

Ikki's voice swims in my ears and makes my knees go limp. I go down along the wall onto the balcony floor. I am burning from places I usually avoid thinking about. Ikki evokes feelings in me that are so obscene I dare not think of words for them. I want everything he offers me, but... what if he disappoints? I do not know anything. I do not know what to do.

"Ikki, I..."

"You want me, don't you...?"

I swallow as Ikki's words make my breath catch in my throat. My own heartbeat almost drowns out his voice as it pounds in my ears.

"I need to hear it. I'll wait, but I need to..."

"I..." I swallow twice. My cheeks are burning hot. Is it even okay to say something like that? But Ikki wants to hear me say it. It is important to him. "I... want... you."

I am sure I cannot breathe.

And at the same moment, the balcony door slides open. Sawa appears at the door and stares directly at me.

"Are you okay?"

"Ikki, I really have to go," I say at the same time as I nod to Sawa and try to get up off the floor.

"I'll wait for you at home tomorrow," Ikki whispers in my ear. "I love you and I want to make love to you in a way you can't imagine anything better."

The heat rushes to my ears as I hang up the phone. Sawa's eyebrows furrow, and she grabs my hand to push me to my shaking feet. The words still echo in my ears as I step back inside under the curious gaze of Mine and Sawa.

Ikki wants to make love to me. Of all the women he could have, he wants to make love to me.

If you like my work, consider reblogging it. That helps more people to find it. Don't feel obliged though. Only do it if you want to, but I do appreciate the gesture.

[fire-tempers-steel]

Regarding Sawa and Kusumoto

I’ve had some meta-thoughts rattling around my brain about Kuwana / Yagami parallels. The game makes a lot of these parallels completely textual – “Two Sides of the Same Coin”, Kuwana’s own words…

Kuwana is Yagami’s shadow, of course– shadow-self, another path he could have taken. 

What I want to talk about in this post is the parallel roles of Sawa Yoko and Kusumoto Reiko in Yagami and Kuwana’s respective justifications for their sense of what’s right. In a very real sense, Sawa is Yagami’s trump card for his justification, and Kusumoto is Kuwana’s. 

I’ll also get into how Sawa-sensei and Kusumoto-san’s respective agency and experiences play into or contrast with how Yagami and Kuwana are interpreting their stories, and make some remarks about what the game does with those narratively.  

*

Starting with Kuwana, Kusumoto is clearly the person in his history he’s the most protective of. He makes frequent reference to how he’d never give her away, and believes for a long time she would never betray him either. And he even forgives her without hesitation upon learning she betrayed him for Mitsuru’s sake. 

Kusumoto-san, I believe, crystallized the purpose he set for himself in order to assuage his guilt. She also gave him company in that, by taking up some of that blood on her own hands, and conferring a kind of gratitude that was almost like forgiveness to him, for his inaction. 

I loved that the game let Kusumoto’s decision to come clean completely eviscerate Kuwana, just have him on the floor begging and bawling. She really was a foundational brick in the foundation of his vigilante-justice-in-the-hands-of-the-forgotten narrative, and the breakdown he suffered was pitch-perfect.

Now what of Kusumoto Reiko herself? I think it’s interesting that the game does give more than ample space to ask the question of whether she’s justified, from a few different angles. 

First, Kawai’s judgment, from her personally. She wanted to give him a chance to show he truly meant it when he begged her for forgiveness. He failed completely to recognize her, acting like a boor. The game itself also narratively tells us in other places that he bragged about his bullying – no remorse there. 

Her torture of Kawai before his death seems to have had an effect on her– she doesn’t regret it, but it was difficult for her, she didn’t relish in it. And at the end of the day, she still was grateful to have the chance to enact justice, and it gave her a kind of bitter peace. 

But the revenge didn’t help her son live. And the moment he came to life, she realized that she could not undo the blood on her hands, that she had, in her rage, erased her chances to live a normal life with her son. She was in the shadow. 

Now, let’s talk about Yagami and Sawa. 

Much to-do is made of how often Yagami harps on “what happened to Sawa-sensei” as his one and only fallback for justifying to Kuwana and his accomplices (co-murderers?) that their actions are wrong. Others apart from me have pointed out that the narrowness of his argument is exactly the point: without cold, hard evidence that someone had gotten hurt as a result of their web of lies, Yagami has a lot less to go on (even to himself!) to make his case. 

This holds weight with Kusumoto, because of Sawa’s fundamental decency (in contrast to Kawai’s, might I add!). 

And ultimately the combined guilt of having betrayed the one decent classmate to Mitsuru, and the parallels of “keeping secrets for life kills” that Sawa presented did wear down Kusumoto and influence her decision to come clean. 

The fact that Yagami pins his convictions on Sawa-sensei makes sense. But it is interesting to contrast that with how she is. 

Sawa is in some ways, powerless and even lacking in conviction to act on what power she does have. Sawa has been a bystander for not one, but three cases of serious bullying, by the time the game starts (Mitsuru, Toshiro, Koda)-- and has never been able to follow through on speaking up for the victims. Speaking out against those who covered up their horrendous neglect (hello? What even happened to that horrible teacher who covered up Toshiro-kun's bullying??)

Yagami, on the other hand, handles Koda’s bullying case with uncanny grace for an outsider. Not only does he prevent the bullying and start to turn on the minds of the bullies, he does so by encouraging the other students to speak up. 

This also provides the parallel that I’ve teased out in the earlier discussion of Kuwana and Kusumoto’s relationship: both Yagami and Kuwana provide tools that they previously lacked to deal with the bullying problem. Yagami, some preventative medicine that worked wonders. And Kuwana, well, the power of Incredible Violence, I guess. The fact that Kusumoto embraces Kuwana’s tools whole heartedly, and Sawa resists Yagami’s interventions despite seeing them work is, I think, another interesting contrast between Sawa and Kusumoto. 

But to round it back to Yagami/Kuwana parallels and discussion, the contrast in the methods they both offer is, philosophically, is why I still align more so with Yagami than I do with Kuwana, even though I’m sympathetic to the realities the game is presenting: that the justice system failed the bullying victims. To focus on the prevention of further violence and injustice seems to me the kinder thing than to enact retribution in the shadows that’s so utterly violent that you believe it’ll prevent further violence (I don’t think this is true! I think Kuwana is very wrong about this! Punitive justice is not good!). 

I’ll end this with a tantalizing question – what kind of paths could be explored if Sawa had not been killed by Soma? I think there could be some really interesting canon-divergence AUs there, and I’m not guaranteeing they’d be positive ones either. Without Sawa’s death giving Yagami more solid justification for staying strong, there’s a lot less he could do, persuasion-wise, and internally, to get people on his side. But by the same token, there seems to be less of an immediate impediment to Kuwana and Yagami being on opposite sides…opportunities for both redemption arcs and corruption arcs there. 

Food for thought for ficcers ;) and feel free to run with this, if you like it. I’m a “many cakes for many concepts” fic enjoyer, so even if I did write such an AU, I’m sure it’d be particular and different. 

And if you've read this all, thank you! Kuwana and Yagami are living in my brain rent-paying <3

[overdevelopedglasses]

i am forced at gunpoint (my brainworms) to ask for your takes on kuwana (i would like to hear from someone who isn't deranged about him. for variety)

The Kuwana.....

First impression: wait this guy is kinda neat

Impression now: HE'S SUCH A LOSER /pos

Favorite moment: right before the final fight when he throws the bomb remote/his phone(?) onto and just. Yells and charges. That's that good shit.

Idea for a story: I'd love to dig into Yokohama 99's dynamic with Kuwana... potentially even before LJ

Unpopular opinion: they could've done so much more with him in LJ (but what we got was awesome)

Favorite relationship: I mean, shoutout to kuwagami obvs. Though I do enjoy (even if we don't get much of it) Kuwana and Sawa.

Favorite headcanon: ...he's into Nickelback

[passthroughtime]

coming to your ask box to tell you that what you said about kuwana being protective of yagami is real and true actually. if kuwana weren't so busy trying to keep himself safe, he'd be doing more to try and keep yagami out of this (though he also desperately wants to be with him more). kuwana knows that yagami can handle a few scratches (and an explosion apparently, lmao) but he would take it very personally if anything ever happened to yagami ....i think. perhaps we're having shared delusions

thank you jichan, you're still the only one ever

yeah. though, he knew if he just went and disappeared without letting yagami know where he's going, it would kinda slow his process of getting into shit and endangering himself, even if for a bit. if kuwana actively and purposely involved him into everything, yagami would be in much more trouble i think. killing him was always an afterthought for RK, but if he'd be involved with kuwana more, well... it just paints a target on his back. and yagami wouldn't try to hide. he has ties to other people, he has something to lose.

so pushing yagami away and out of this all was a bit "two birds with one stone" kind of situation

though he also desperately wants to be with him more

yeah lol, i just realized that when kuwana gives him the pendant so he'd help ehara, he says that yagami is the only one he can trust with it, and like, really? you have lots of accomplices whose actions you can literally control, jeez, man xD

and of course kuwana suspected (or anticipated) that yagami would use this against ehara, so there's that also. but. his motivations are a mess, so we can be a little delusional about this as well i think

and an explosion apparently, lmao

explosion is nothing compared to all injuries yagami suffered in the end of JE, kuwana figured, he can survive a little explosion <3 it'd be good for him <3

but he would take it very personally if anything ever happened to yagami

no no, you're right. i mean, he does beat himself up over sawa, as well as mitsuru. he couldn't not feel responsible if this case would lead to yagami's demise as well. if anything, i can't say that kuwana doesn't care about other people. he even cares about his students even knowing that they despise him (i can't stop thinking about the fact that he agreed to meet with yagami so they'd release mamiya... it's not like he was afraid she'd spill everything, i mean, he tells yagami about a lot of things himself)

or maybe i really want to think that kuwana is a better person than he actually is. idk.

tbh i doubt my characterization of them a lot, hence all these disclaimers lol. and i really want to know other's opinions and why i can be wrong in how i view them? i mean, we are a small community. i can see people disagreeing with me, though in silence. but i want to discuss this, because i strive to see all sides of things, and i think it's fun to take their relationship apart again and again

i re-watch quite, uh. let's say, often the cutscenes featuring the two of them, and sometimes the moments where there's only mentions of them. i've started to write an "analysis" of each scene and their (presumed) reactions to their interactions, because it really does make things clearer in my head. i'm replaying the game rn, trying to see anything beyond my insanity lmao, but it's still just one view on things, you know? i really want to have a discussion and see where i can be wrong. and just... it'd be fun to listen other people talking about my favourite characters.

(is this approach insane? of course! but i'm having fun at the very least, and if i can have fun two years after i've finished LJ for the first time, well, i'll take it.)

when i say that i think about them a lot, i really mean it lol. (that's not my first rodeo, so business as usual for me.) but even if i strive to open-minded, and even if i re-visit canon again and again, it's hard to not be biased about lots of things.

and, yeah, i'm really glad to hear that you agree with me on this hc. but even if you, or anyone else, didn't, i'd want to hear all about it

[devilsrecreation]

Random Outlander interaction headcanons

So I basically gathered all the (canon) Outlanders, put their names on a wheel, and whichever two characters it landed on, I made a hc about them and the results are….interesting

Nduli and Dogo:

Lmao they’d probably bond over being the cute ones in their respective groups. Goigoi brings Dogo along to hang out and he finds out he’s got a lot in common with a crocodile: they’re both the youngest, they both look innocent, their leaders/parents are friends…kinda, they look on the bright side of things, sisi ni sawa! Imagine Dogo teaching Nduli how to do those puppy eyes he’s famous for

Imagine it actually manages to work on Kiburi 💀

Kiburi: I said no.

Nduli: Please? 🥺

Kiburi: *sighs* Fine, but just this one time….

Mzingo and Neema:

Despite Mzingo not knowing the crocodiles all that well, I can see Mzingo actually understanding Neema since he picked up on the native animal tongues during the Dry Season. He’s now fluent in hyena, jackal, lizard, possibly serpent (?), and you guessed it-crocodilian. He’s actually very impressed with how intelligent Neema is, so now the two of them have these intellectual discussions that Mzingo doesn’t get to have with anyone else except for his parliament. Really opens his eyes in a way

Cheezi and Kiburi:

Ah yes, friends through other friends lol. I feel like the moment the two have a conversation, Cheezi sees exactly why Kiburi and Janja are BFF’s while Kiburi sees why Cheezi and Nduli get along. I can see Kiburi getting annoyed at Cheezi trying to ride on his back while Cheezi laughs at how much Kiburi reminds him of Janja

Imagine Cheezi telling stories about Janja so Kiburi could get to know him better. Cute for the both of them, Janja…not so much

Goigoi and Ushari:

Oh that is a weird combo jghfh. I feel like Goigoi would annoy Ushari the very few times they met. He used to ask so many dumb questions like “What’s it like havin no limbs?”, “How do you eat?”, “How do ya hang out with things smaller than you and not squish ‘em?”

Ushari: I don’t have time for this. I need to talk to the skinks…

Goigoi: Speakin’ of skinks, why does that red one call you “babygirl”?

Ushari: How about you ssstop talking.

It’s no better now that he’s a ghost lmao. Goigoi’s trying to find something he’s good at and it’s like

Ushari: You fool, you’re not supposed to—Goigoi, what are you doing?!

Goigoi (to himself cuz he can’t hear Ushari): If I mix the paint with the honey, it’ll stay on quicker! Heeheehee! Goigoi ya really done it this time!

Ushari: No no no, you’re going to get *sees Goigoi struggling* Ssssstuck….

What is this, what fanfic am I creating-

Wema and Sumu:

Sumu doesn’t really like kids, so he has no idea what to make of this little child who started trying to play with him like it was nothing. Wema likes Sumu, she thinks he’s a cute little bug who likes making silly faces (in reality, he’s trying to see if she’ll become scared of him so she’ll leave him alone)

Sumu: *makes a scary face, hissing*

Wema: 😄

Sumu: ….What

Nduli and Jasiri:

See, the first thing I’m thinking of is @spinnysocks ‘s mjuzi AU and ig all mjuzis are friends with their rulers but I wonder what it’d be like in my own hc?

I think they’d be good friends. Nduli is the first of Kiburi’s float to give Jasiri a chance and helps her get to know the float better. In return, Jasiri probably encourages Nduli to stand up for himself a bit more. She knows he’s always following Kiburi around but “Nobody’s perfect. Everyone’s bound to make a mistake and when someone does, they should know what they’re doing wrong”. Come to think of it, Jasiri’s advice was the reason Nduli finally stood up to Kiburi and got him to change for the better. She even encouraged him to become a detective, seeing how fairly intelligent he was. She told him he could put some of the facts he knew to good use and he did!

Shupavu and Jasiri:

#Girlbosses lol. I think Shupavu would warm up to Jasiri first after she becomes ruler. As soon as she agrees to respect the circle of life again, Jasiri probably makes some sassy remark about some of the other Outlanders and Shupavu’s like “Hmm, I like you~”. I can see Jasiri laughing at whatever gossip Shupavu tells her, not to mention they realize they have more in common than they thought: They’re both smart, strong, independent female leaders who would do anything for their respective groups cuz they’re the only family they have (which is a trait practically all the leaders share but still).

Related hc, actually: one of the first rules Jasiri makes is that the skinks are not allowed to be hunted by other animals within the Outlands, which is the thing that gains Shupavu’s trust

Janja and Madoa:

It’s kinda funny how much I ship Janja and Jasiri, but never once thought about what his friendship with Madoa would be like. I know they’d definitely start off on the wrong paw, you know, with Scar’s army and all that. But I can see them bonding over Jasiri and eventually getting along. Janja could ask Madoa about the things Jasiri likes cuz no one knows her better than her sister while Madoa could maybe get Janja to be a better listener. Not to mention, they could definitely talk about Nne together, though Janja would be like “Nne’s a jerk, you can do better”

Tano and Nne (oh that’s way too easy lol what are the odds):

I’ve mentioned this before but I’ll say it again cuz I love me some background, the two met when Nne was cornered by a couple of older hyena cubs (think preteens while Nne and Tano were like…9-10 maybe) who were teasing him cuz of his birthmark. That was until they heard a “Ah, leave him alone!”. Cue a back and forth where the older cubs try to bully Tano as well, only for them to end up getting roasted by a child. Two, actually cuz that gives Nne the confidence to clap back too! The minute the bullies do come up with a good insult/comeback, their parents witness them and drag them by the ears. The two introduced themselves afterward and the rest was history

Chungu and Nne:

I like to think while Nne views Chungu as an idiot and calls him as such, he still apologized to him and Cheezi after the events of “Janja’s New Crew”. He may be a dumbass, but he has to admit Chungu helped him get through some tough times so he’s a bit nicer to him than Tano is. I can even see Chungu comforting him after his and Tano’s plan failed like “that’s okay, the lion guard roars at me and Cheezi too!”. Sweet boy :3

Jasiri and Njano:

….Jasiri likes working with the skinks, doesn’t she, lmao? They like each other, Njano’s grateful that Jasiri was the only one actually willing to help them for once and Jasiri appreciates how Njano was the first of the skinks to reform. Not to mention Njano makes her laugh. He’s like Cheezi, only smarter in her opinion lol. Maybe they even share a brain cell sometimes!

Jasiri: Thanks for giving me a chance

Njano: Thanks for not letting us get eaten :)

Madoa and Sumu:

Ah yes, the unlikely friends lol. I imagine that Madoa was the reason Sumu wanted to become a healer in the first place. He saw how much happiness and comfort she was giving a random member of her clan and he decided he wanted to help animals instead of harm them

Madoa’s one of the few animals that didn’t scream or run away when she saw Sumu (though she did get startled at first), instead showing him kindness and was happy to mentor him in healing. While she had no idea if an arachnid was capable of being a healer, she was nothing but nice and patient towards him. And while Madoa taught Sumu about different herbs and remedies, he taught her how to stand up for herself (as she’s a bit of a pushover). He’s even given her a couple pointers about romance when she revealed her crush on Nne. Yeah, he has a soft spot for her :)

Shupavu and Goigoi:

Lmao if Ushari doesn’t like Goigoi, Shupavu doesn’t like Goigoi jfgjfh. She likes Reirei, she considers her a friend, but she has no idea how the hell she fell for such an idiot; like she cannot comprehend how you could fall in love with someone so dumb😭. Yet, poor Goigoi can’t take the hint. It’s not your fault Goigoi, she just can’t deal with stupid

Janja and Shupavu:

Oh look, the Outlander Shupavu hates the most. They literally have no respect for each other whatsoever. I think each of them even go out of their way to disrespect the other. I swear their rivalry would be something out of Tom and Jerry or Looney Tunes with the insults and the mini chase scenes nfhhdhd

That is until Janja and the skinks get trapped in a cave and have to find their way out…

Janja and Sumu:

Oh, well this one’s totally canon. Janja is and probably will always be terrified of Sumu. Sumu, being used to all the fear directed at him, is pretty indifferent and at most just rolls his eyes. Other than that, he’s cordial. Though I like to think Sumu takes care of Janja’s wound at some point and that makes him a little less scared of the arachnid (although he still creeps him out lol)

Wema and Shupavu:

Shupavu (well none of the skinks sans Njano, really) isn’t that good with kids, but I like to think she warms up to Wema a bit, seeing how sweet the cub is. I like to think Wema gives Shupavu a caterpillar she caught and Shupavu was like “For me? Hm, you’re not so bad.”

Ushari and Dogo:

They haven’t interacted much when he was alive other than exchanging polite greetings, but I like to think he indirectly helps Dogo as much as he does for Wema and Tunu, like dropping small rocks on Janja’s head when he’s acting cold towards him. Ushari likes the pup better than his dad lol that’s for sure

Kenge and Nne:

Honestly, Kenge would tolerate Nne more than he does Janja, Chungu, and Cheezi. Not a fan of the snark, but the hyena at least knows how to watch his mouth. I like to imagine Nne sprinkling compliments here and there just to keep himself on Kenge’s good side. He brags to the others that “we’re obviously not besties or anything, but we’re cool! …We’re cool, right?”

Kenge: Yes hyena, you’re not bad.

Nne: See? I’m not so bad! Maybe because I follow directions, right bud?

Kenge: Don’t push it

Nne: Gotcha.

Tunu and Kijana:

I can see them being besties! Maybe Tunu even looks up to her in a way, with her usually the one that comes up with plans. They both tend to think things through

Kiburi and Neema:

Kiburi and Neema definitely share the same/similar opinions and ideas, hence why they’re good friends. Being the only other smart one, Kiburi trusts Neema to watch over his float whenever he has to go to a meeting, which Neema appreciates since it means Kiburi appreciates his intelligence and responsibility. Also in my Neema-centered hc (aka his double life as a phantom), Kiburi eventually sees how much Neema loves music and lets him keep being a phantom, even if he personally isn’t a fan of the concept. As long as Neema is still part of the float (which he is), he’s free to have his own identity. Just….don’t make him sing lol

As for what Neema does to Kiburi, well he’s that friend you go to whenever you want to rant and supports you no matter what and that’s all Kiburi needs

[ecargmura]

Cherry Magic Episode 8 Review - I'm A Wizard, Kurosawa

There’s so much good progression between Kurodachi (or KuroAda in the eastern fandom) and Tsugemina in this episode. For Kurodachi, Adachi finally musters up the courage to reveal his secret to Kurosawa. For Tsugemina, they get a bit closer to the point that Minato invites Tsuge to take pictures of him at the club he dances at.

I do like that the entire episode is about Adachi’s worries about Kurosawa finding about his secret. While he is worried about his boyfriend hating him, he knows that he can still use the power to good use like learning about Kurosawa’s birthday and what he should get for that special day. He also learned that Tsuge is a wizard and that they can communicate telepathically. It’s funny how awkward these two are when it comes to the magic because they just learned about the telepathy for the first time. Though, I do wonder how they’re speaking to each other mentally when they’re not touching…maybe their feet are touching?

While he did get scared at first, he realized that it’s not because of what Kurosawa thinks, it’s because of what he believes Kurosawa will think and that he knows Kurosawa wouldn’t hate him if he revealed it. Fortunately, Kurosawa doesn’t hate him; it’s impossible for Mr. Simp-sawa to hate him.  I do like that Kurosawa is flustered, asks when this all happened and gets embarrassed. He did have so pretty crazy thoughts, so it’s understandable that he’d react that way. I would too, if I learned that the person I liked could read my mind all this time.

The kiss scene between them was good! I liked it. It was subtle and quiet. Kurosawa was silent throughout the whole scene, which means that he was just enjoying the moment. My eyes were glued that I was clutching my earbud case tightly. It was nicely animated! The live-action version censored the kiss between them! This is redemption!

The Tsugemina scenes were adorable. Although their progression is slower than the main couple’s, I can see the chemistry between them. Minato does look like he is into Tsuge with the way he defends him from the club guard and also him taking off his glasses and admiring his looks without them. It’s cute! My only gripe with the Tsugemina scene is that Tsuge seems to be taking pictures of Minato without the camera lens. Is that an animation error?

It was nice seeing the friendship between Adachi and Tsuge. Adachi is a lot more cheerful when around Tsuge, to the point that Kurosawa legit damages an exercise equipment. I hope you paid for that. I also liked the reveal that Rokkaku and Minato are indeed friends. My favorite part of the customer survey part was seeing how flexible Minato is. Damn, he can excel in yoga with that leg pose.

I did like how Adachi telling Kurosawa of his magic was the entire focus of the episode. It didn’t drag out to the point of being a two-parter. I’m glad everything got resolved in one episode. What’s next on the list now that the secret is out? I can’t wait to find out next week. What are your thoughts on this episode?

[tofautisawa]

You're an experienced animal writer, and you seem to have a really good grasp on the complicated realm of mixing animal/human moralities and behaviors in writing (such as lion infanticide) But do you have any opinions on how hyena-on-hyena infanticide should be handled with the most care in a story, if it's included? Would it be treated like a tragic inevitable risk since mothers can't enter their cubs den and the cubs don't understand, should it be reserved for unsympathetic characters, etc

I think you're giving me far too much credit there. lol Long post warning! This is not a thing that will be properly explored in Tofauti Sawa, as the hyena siblings featured (Amani and Dumaka, Nakato and Thabo) will not have any mention if they tried to kill each other after birth, if they succeeded and Sahara herself didn't have any siblings. Though I imagine that Nakato and Thabo didn't since I already drew a illustration of them shortly after their birth and things were peaceful. I imagine within my own story, if a hyena mother witnesses her cubs trying to kill each other ( I have seen footage of this happening while the mother is in the burrow), her own actions for it will heavily depend on her personality. ( This also applies to any talk of lion infantcide featured. Even in real life not every situation is the same.) | For example, If Masozi was to give birth to another cub along with Sahara and Sahara started attacking the sibling ( because let's face it, she would), Masozi would put a stop to it because she was excited to be a mom and would want all her offspring to survive. Adira if she had more than one cub that started fighting, wouldn't give a shit. And then you will have random hyena 02948348 that won't intervene because she would want to put all attention on the strongest cub, etc. etc. It just all depends I suppose. I dunno.

One difficult thing about writing this comic is when taking account of animal characters actions when you want them to actually act like the animals they are based off of compared to human morality. It's probably what makes Munirah such a debatable character ( and Gatura to a small extent). Like a stork killing their smallest weakest chick to focus on raising offspring she feels would have a better chance at life and worth using resources will be horrible to us but normal to them. And by that definition people wouldn't want said character to be rooted for in a narrative. Some people may understand from a animal perspective that Munirah would want offspring she feels will be strong and sire them with a male she deems worthy, but from a human perspective you aren't gonna root for her when she throws her own sister under the bus and doesn't give a rat's ass when her new boy toy kills her nieces. And some people already aren't rooting for her due to how she antagonizes Silver before it all went down. The animal morality perspective thing could also be why people tend to give Gatura less grief about killing Malaika and Safi because the reason he did it is the same reason why male lions do it real life ( and zebras...and horses...and a whole lot of animals really), but of course to us- it's horrible. And then there is that whole can of worms about the lionesses eventually mating with the male that killed their previous litter which Alika of course will sooner take a cheese grater to Gatura's di-- I have no idea wtf I am talking about at this point and I am not even sure I even answered your question at this point. I never started this comic trying to teach morals or have a lesson in it, the characters are kind of doing whatever at this point, so I am hardly the person to be asking when it comes to this sort of thing because even I am sweating nervously while typing this. The original draft of this story was actually a lot more darker than what you are getting now but I toned it down over the years if you can actually believe that. lol Ultimately, it's entirely up to you how you choose to portray this in your own story. Or you can take the easier route and not include it at all if it's too difficult to you to actually address in your story without making things complicated from a animal vs human morality standpoint unless there is a direction you are 100% certain you want to go. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I'm just rambling at this point and I feel there might be people who could better discuss this in a much better way than I can, and probably word it better too because I felt I butchered it so hard.

[hopkei]

Fantastics 100 Questions & Answers! Pt.2

Source: Monthly Exile August 2020 (Part one)

🚨Warning: may contain inaccuracies!🚨 Feel free to share elsewhere but please credit me🌻

~~

Questions 11-20

11. The surprise that made you the most happy so far? Sekai: When I became a member of Exile Taiki: My 20th birthday. Akira-san hosted the TRIBE members and Odake Masato-san and we did a countdown! (tn: Odake Masato is a lyricist, some of the songs he has written for Fantastics include Terminal, Dear Destiny, and Flying Fish, as well as songs for Exile, JSB3, Generations, and more) Sawa: 2018/1/29 when all the members wished me a happy birthday! Leiya: Birthday surprise from my peers/colleagues Hori: Two years ago when FANTASTICS got to join EXILE on their “STAR OF WISH” tour, on the day of rehearsal manager-san led me into Exile’s dressing room but it was completely dark,, then Exile and Fantastics members all celebrated my birthday. It is the memory of a lifetime!! Keito: My 20th birthday Yusei: While shooting the “Supersonic” music video for BOT, Generations senpais and Fantastics members prepared a cake and wished me happy birthday! Sota: When I turned 20, my parents sent me an album they made with a lot of old photos and messages from various people. Honestly, I looked at the messages when I was alone at home and cried a lot. (laughs)

12. What do you do when you’re soaking in the bath? Sekai: I don’t do anything Taiki: I blast music super loudly and sing! Read scripts for work! Sawa: I space out and try to fall asleep. I just barely manage to stay awake Leiya: Make songs Hori: I watch videos on my computer Keito: I watch anime, movies, and dramas on a streaming site. Yusei: I close my eyes and imagine a forest Sota: Lately, I’ve been practicing English by explaining what I did that day or things that happened! By myself. (laughs) Sometimes I’ll ask the wall questions and a chaotic time will pass in the water. As chaotic as it can be when you’re taking a bath

13. In your group, which member has the most amazing gap? Sekai: In Exile, Tetsuya-san. In Fanta, there’s no one lol Taiki: Seguchi Leiya. There is a big difference between when he is ON and when he is OFF. (laughs) Sawa: Yusei (゜∀゜) Leiya: Keito Hori: Sawanatsu-kun Keito: Horinatsu-kun Yusei: Yagi Yusei Sota: Sawamoto Natsuki-kun! Usually he is the laidback type that doesn’t come forward and talk much but in the dressing room or at a restaurant he becomes the most animated and excited! (laugh)

14. When did you decide/want to become an artist? Sekai: Through the experience I had in New York when I was a teenager Taiki: I watched an EXILE concert in 2009! Sawa: When I was dancing support for J SOUL BROTHERS / 「BLUE IMPACT」 Leiya: (I wanted to) ever since I became conscious  Hori: When I had the opportunity to be a support dancer for Sandaime J Soul Brothers LIVE TOUR 2014 "BLUE IMPACT”, and being able to accompany members on stage and see them up close, it seriously made me want to become an artist!  Keito: When I was participating in in the 2010 Exile Stadium Tour Yusei: When I was in middle school and sang in front of other people Sota: I like to sing and play instruments so jokingly my friends and I would sing lots of songs like a band, and it made me happy to see everyone from school watch my Timeline or receive messages, and I even won the singing competition alone at the school festival, then since I declared to the whole school “I will become a singer on the stage!” it became a dream that had to become true! (laugh) (tn: LINE Timeline (since changed to LINE VOOM) was a feature in the LINE app that allows users to post news and photos. it was essentially like facebook within the LINE app)

15. One song that has supported you through life? Sekai: Kageyama Hironobu - WE GOTTA POWER Taiki: Ketsumeishi - Nakama Sawa: EELMAN / 「Simple」 Leiya: Ketsumeishi - Nakama Hori: EXILE / 「Pure」 Keito: Going ON / EXILE, Tenohiranosune / EXILE, Kokoroe / Road of Major Yusei: Utada Hikaru - Hikari Sota: BEGIN ft アホナスターズ - Egao no Manma

16. The qualification do you want to get most right now? Sekai: Game programmer, Manga artist Taiki: Kanken (tn: The Japan Kanji Aptitude Test, it is to test the ability to read, write, and understand kanji) Sawa: Chef Leiya: Large motorcycle license Hori: Diving license (tn: this is not a typo. as in scuba diving.) Keito: Nutritionist Yusei: A teaching license! Sota: Mental health counselor. Because I love people! Please get more scared (laugh)

17. When you eat taiyaki, do you eat it starting from the head or the tail? Sekai: Head Taiki: Head Sawa: Head Leiya: Tail Hori: From the head! Keito: Head Yusei: I eat it from the head! Sota: The head! Did you think it’s the tail? It’s the head! #It's long #This is not something that needs a long answer

18. The strongest memory of shooting or interviewing with “Monthly EXILE”? Sekai: The first time we all came and made the page together by hand for the planned shoot (2017 February edition) Taiki: When we wore colorful shirts and shot a two-page layout. It was fun wearing glasses and colorful shirts like cicadas! (2019 November issue) Sawa: When I shot with Taiki-kun! (2019 May issue) Leiya: Taiki-kun’s individual published “Wanna Be, Wanna Do” Thanks to Taiki-kun’s consideration I was able to shoot something in a style I wanted to do for the first time (2018 December issue) Hori: The time before debut for Taiki’s issue and we did a shoot together with just the two of us. Even now when I think back on it, I think it was the most fun shoot! (2018 October issue) Keito: Fantastics first cover shoot (2019 February issue) Yusei: The shoot for the first time Fantastics was on the cover! (2019 February issue) Sota:The first time you let Fantastics shoot for the cover! (2019 February issue) With all of my might, thank you so much!

19. If you could use magic just once, what would you use it for? Sekai: I would make the number of uses unlimited Taiki: I want to restart my life from when I was 20! Sawa: I want to make a different self  (= ´ ∀ `)人(´ ∀ ` =) Leiya: Go back to a certain time and talk a lot Hori: To fly in the sky Keito: To fly Yusei: I want to fly! Sota: The magic to make a door anywhere #After that you can have a door everywhere

20. What do you want to be your last meal? Sekai: The tastiest thing in the world that I haven’t had the chance to eat yet Taiki: My mom’s homemade cooking Sawa: Grilled eel rice bowl!!! Leiya: My mom’s food Hori: Akadashi Miso soup (tn: miso soup that uses red bean paste) Keito: Yakiniku (grilled meat) Yusei: My mom’s homemade cooking! Sota: A hamburger!

[skajador]

If I got to make a build v-cine I would take a huge swerve around whatever they did in the actual ones and make a fun series of vignettes about what actually happened when Sawa says "don't ask how I got this info"

It's what she deserves also I think she has a hot spy gf in every city 💖