#WHAT THE HELL KANE (affectionate)

[whumpshaped]

My laptop died so thus us from my main account.

But how did El and Am’s first date go?

El and Bellamy eventually getting along is so sweet! The spk lives in my brain rent free with @livelaughwhump’s worthless series, @whumpsday Kane and Jim and your oc El! Also Grace from Dollhouse

/genuine

@rosewriteswhump

i think their first date went kind of like this:

el was a nervous wreck beforehand, despite bellamy being like "but el youve known him for months now this is not a stranger-"

i say bellamy because kane is still in the "i dont approve of this" stage, and also el would be an anxious mess specifically in bellamy's room because they're asking him for style advice

el is dressed in the cutest clothes. but the outfit is still fit for outdoorsy activities, because am said it would include a bit of a hike

when am arrives, he also reminds el that theyve known each other for a while now and theres no need to be nervous

el cries "BUT THIS IS DIFFERENT"

despite that, they finally relax a little

am compliments them on their looks, very sincerely, obviously being genuine

el cant help but wonder if hes lying or mocking them

el also compliments him, because as always, hes hot as hell. hes not in his regular gothy clothes though, hes also dressed for a bit of a hike. half his hair is up in a lil ponytail. el is very in love

am smiles and thanks them

APPARENTLY I DID NOT WRITE THIS BEFORE (despite me clearly remembering this scene-) SO ACTUALLY LET ME JUST

El felt pretty bad having to stop all the time. Their body was back to how it used to be, or as close as it'd ever get, the only problem was that they never used to be very fit. Not even before spending years rotting away in a cage, destroying what little muscle they had left.

Am never complained. He pointed out flowers, berries, cool rocks... He seemed more than happy to stand in one spot for minutes at a time, just talking about nature and his past experiences on that very trail. He never broke a sweat.

"We're almost there," he said gently, seemingly a little self-conscious about his choice of date activity. "I promise. It's just a little further up. I just- I really wanted to show you this place. I didn't realise it'd be pretty tiring for a human."

"No, no..." El took a deep breath, trying to force some life into their body. "It's not- other humans could probably do it, no problem. I'm just... I'm sorry, I'm not very... I'm sorry for being so slow."

"I can carry you, if you'd like."

El blinked up at him, considering the offer. It sounded really nice. Really nice. But they didn't want to be an inconvenience. "You, um... you wouldn't mind?"

"Not at all. In fact, I'm fairly sure having a little guy on my back would actually improve the experience. I've never explored the trail with a little guy on my back before."

They laughed a little, beaming up at him affectionately, almost adoringly. "It's your lucky day, then! I know just the little guy for you."

Am really didn't seem inconvenienced by the extra weight. He held them steady with both hands under their thighs, keeping up the same pace from before without issue. Maybe he was a little faster, even, without having to wait for them.

El hugged him loosely around the neck, half their face buried in Am's fluffy, curly hair as they rested their head against him. The trail was so beautiful. They couldn't help but wish they were just a little stronger, with a little more endurance... maybe then they'd be able to walk along the pretty forest path and have fun. Maybe one day.

At one point, El noticed that the trees were getting fewer and farther between, and they raised their head to see where they were. They had reached the top of the hill, it seemed like, arriving to a small clearing. It was almost like a balcony, with a little wooden fence to keep the hikers from tumbling down the hillside, and two logs to serve as benches.

They wiggled out of Am's hold, wanting to rush towards the fence as soon as their feet hit the ground, but he grabbed them by the arm and pulled them back. "Be careful, baby. I have fallen down there before, and it's not a fun time. The fence, uh... the fence was put up after that incident."

El winced at the thought. "I'm sorry. I'll be careful."

The response must've been sufficient, because El was let go of, allowed to wander out to the edge of the cliff (with ample supervision, of course). They rested their hands on top of the fence, wide eyes full of childish wonder trailing across the hundreds of small spots of light below.

"That's gorgeous," they whispered.

Am hummed, a small, pleased sound. "I'm glad you like it. It's... my favourite hiking spot, I think."

"Of course I like it! I mean, there could be an elevator from the foot of the hill that brings me up here, but-"

"And miss all the flowers and mushrooms on the way up? Or the little rabbits during springtime? And the squirrels?" Am looked positively scandalised, but El had to admit, the arguments were very sound.

"Rabbits?" they asked, hopeful and delighted by the prospect. "Little bunbuns? Tiny little creatures?"

"Yeah! We could bring some hay and feed them together. They're super friendly. Well, unless you wanna take the forest elevator instead," he teased, making them pout.

"I might just steal the bunnies and ride the elevator with them! I'll stuff it full of hay ahead of time, so, so by the time I get here and it's time to choose between the trail and the elevator, they're already in there! All of them! Just monching away... And, and you'll choose the trail, because you're soooo fit and in shape, and when the elevator door opens and you see all those cute bunnies, it'll be too late to take it back! And I'll say, aha, my plan worked as intended!"

Am listened to the monologue intently, looking absolutely charmed and in love, a fact that El only noticed when they got to the end of their evil genius plan. They blushed slightly, quickly looking away again.

"What?" Their voice was much quieter now, clearly flustered.

Am gently cupped their face, turning them back towards himself. "And you're saying you wouldn't let me change my decision? You wouldn't let me in your bunny-elevator?"

"Well- well... you, um, you denounced the idea of the bunlevator. So, uh, therefore, I have to stand my ground."

The forest around them seemed to fade away as Am leaned down, almost kissing them, but not quite. "Is there really no way to change your mind?" he murmured, pressing a little kiss onto their cheek.

"I'm open to negotiation," they choked out, making him grin.

"My lucky day indeed."

~

taglist: @whumpsday @whump-queen @lost-in-labradorite-halls @hidden-dreamland @lonesome--hunter @melancholy-in-the-morning @the-scrapegoat @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night

[breaniebree]

SNEAK PEEK!

SNEAK PEEK at Chapter 356 -- The One With the Dickwad

The house was quaint and warm and Spencer Kane had greeted him with a warm hug.

“Theo!  We’re so pleased that you finally convinced Sebastian to bring you over.  We were beginning to think that he was holding you hostage.”

“Da,�� Sebastian groaned, rolling his eyes.  “We’ve been busy.”

Spencer kept his arm across Theo’s shoulders.  “Busy, he says.  Horseshit!  He’s worried we’ll embarrass him.”

“Will you?”  Theo asked, curiously.

Spencer grinned, his blue eyes so like his son’s twinkling in delight.  “Absolutely!  Sadira, come meet Bastian’s Theo!”

Sadira was wiping her hands on her apron as she came out of the kitchen, a wide smile on her pretty face.  “Theo, dear, so lovely to see you again!”  She kissed both of his cheeks before taking his hand.  “Come, sit!  Would you like some tea?  Wine?  Beer?”

“Tea will be fine, Maman,” Sebastian said, moving to hug his father.

Once they were settled in the living room, Theo held his tea cup, unsure what to do with his hands.

“So, Theo, how did you and Sebastian meet?”  Spencer asked.

“At the Ministry of Magic,” Theo told them.  “He yelled at me.”

“I didn’t yell at him,” Sebastian interrupted.  “I… he was in my way.”

“He growled,” Theo said, smiling at his boyfriend.  “And then he brought me cappuccino after my Wizengamot sessions.”

“You’re in the Wizengamot?”  Spencer asked.

“I am, Sir,” Theo replied.  “For over a year now.  I accepted my seat when I took over Norfolk.”

“Norfolk… bloody hell, Bastian!  You didn’t tell us that you were dating a marquess!”  Spencer exclaimed, jumping to his feet.  “We would have made the place cleaner for you, Lord Norfolk!”

Theo chuckled.  “Theo is perfect, Mr Kane, and your home is lovely.”

“Spencer,” he insisted, a warm smile on his face.  “You’ll call me, Spencer.”

Sadira smiled.  “So, our son met you after the Wizengamot and you started dating?”

“Eventually,” Theo said.  “It took him a while to ask me out.  Months, actually.  I didn’t even know he liked me.  I called him Auror Arsehole.”

“Sebastian!”  Sadira lectured.  “Were you rude to this sweet man?”

“No, Maman.”

“A little,” Theo teased.  “But he came around.”

By the time dinner was served, Theo was convinced that they were the nicest people he had ever met.  They told him stories about Sebastian when he was younger and pulled out photos.  Theo was charmed when he heard that Sebastian had called his sisters “Seen and Ray-Ray” for years, unable to pronounce their names properly.  He laughed when Sadira showed him photos of Sebastian naked in the bathtub and of him dressed in her clothes having tea with his sisters.

“Those girls convinced him to do everything,” Sadira said affectionately.  “He just wanted to play and didn’t care what they forced him to do.”

Spencer talked about his shop and filled Theo in on some of the strange things he tinkered with or fixed.  Theo laughed until he cried and when Sadira hugged him close and told him he made her baby happy, he hugged her back, surprised that he didn’t want to let go.

“Sebastian, darling, you’ll bring him to our anniversary party,” Sadira insisted.

“He’ll be there, Maman,” Sebastian promised.  “Actually, Theo’s been a great help with everything.  You’re going to be blown away by how beautiful everything is.”

Spencer slipped his arm around his wife’s waist.  “Nothing will be more beautiful than the woman at the altar.”

Sadira’s eyes softened as she kissed her husband’s cheek.  “Such a sweet talker.”

Theo was hugged by both of them again before they left and Sebastian had draped his arm across his shoulders.  

“Well, that wasn’t as embarrassing as I expected.”

Theo grinned up at him.  “Your parents are amazing and you were the cutest kid!”

Sebastian rolled his eyes.  “She totally brought out the naked baby photos on purpose.  My mother’s a menace.”

“Baby photos?”  Theo teased.  “I liked the one of you when you were eight standing starkers in the living room wearing a cape and a crown.  What did your mum say again?  You declared yourself a king and said that all of your subjects were to be starkers because clothes were itchy?”

Sebastian blushed.  “I can’t believe that she took photos of me like that!”

“You were so cute!”

“Let’s talk about something else.”

Theo grinned and stood on his toes to kiss him.  “Thank you for bringing me to meet them.”

Sebastian held him close, his forehead against his.  “Thank you for coming to meet them.”

[inactive17645]

Safe & Sound [1]

Chapter One: Pilot

Pairing: Bellamy Blake x Reader & Wells Jaha x Reader

Warnings: Swearing & Mild Violence

Word Count: 3637

Author’s Note: Welcome to the first chapter of my very first series here on tumblr! I hope you guys come enjoy the ride and stay until the end. I know there are a few Bellamy x Reader fanfic series on here now, but I really wanted to put my own spin on a The 100 rewrite. Also, please let me know if you want to be tagged in any future parts by either PMing me or through my ‘Ask Me Anything’ tab on my profile!

Season Masterlist

Series Masterlist

      It was supposed to be like any other day. I’d wake up, the guard would give me three small portions of food throughout the day, whilst rereading the various classics and Greek mythology books my father sent. Eventually, I’d fall back asleep with my mother’s dove pendant clutched in my hand as I gazed out the window, into the dark abyss scattered with diamonds. On every other day, you’d make sure to aside time to practice self-defence. Something that my father had guards teach me before I was locked up.

    Today was not one of those days. The chaos of yelling, screaming and grumbling outside the door ripped me from my trance. I shook my head and tried to engross myself again in the book I clutched, but the sound of the door flinging open broke it.

     It also didn’t help that this was the last day before I’d be eighteen. Before I’d be floated.

     “Prisoner 301, face the wall.” My breath hitched in my throat. No! I still had one more day! 

When you didn’t even move an inch towards a wall the guard stalked his way towards you, his presence towering over your sitting form. “Get up on your feet!”

     “No! I still have a day left you cunt!” You screeched.

     With a punch to the man’s groin, he collapsed to the ground and you scampered out to escape. Unfortunately, I’ve tried to escape my cell multiple times so it was no surprise when someone tackled me as soon as I left the room.

      “Get. Me. The. Fuck Off!” I yelled as punch after punch landed on the man’s back. The man grunted after each punch, but he never let me go until I was stood in front of the one man who turned me in a year ago. My own father; Marcus Kane.

     Although it was a relief to see him after so long, I couldn’t help but glare at the man. He was supposed to be there for you no matter what, yet he never visited. Too much of a coward to face you and sent books in his place. The kind of books you and your mom used to read together.

     “Dad?!” I hated him, but I still hugged him. I hated him, but I still loved my father.

     Your eyes glossed with tears that had every intention to escape.

 “I don’t want to die, not today!” I pleaded, refusing the tears to shower my cheeks. “I don’t want to be floated!”

     “You’re not being floated (y/n),” He told you. “You’re being sent down to earth.” A chill ran down my spine.

     “But I thought the earth was still uninhabitable?” Dad just shook his head as another guard hooked me over their shoulder and stalked away from my father’s now retreating figure.

     Typical. Just like when I was first chucked in the skybox. He couldn’t even muster a single goodbye. The punching of another guard ensued as he hauled me over to the dropship entrance.

     Suddenly, there was a prick in my arm and gradually I drew drowsier, and drowsier. My punches slowly weakened after each hit. The last thing I saw before I succumbed to darkness was the menacing smirk of one Commander Shumway, my eyes darkening in both anger and fear.

     In what felt like seconds, my eyes squinted open while adjusting to the poor lighting of the dropship. Screams and yells from others around me filled my ears. As my vision came into focus, I looked around to see the horror morphed on many of the teens’ faces. In the seat five seats down from me, I recognised a familiar head of blonde that I knew oh so well.

     “Clarke!” I called. The blonde whipped her head my way and relief settled on both our faces. “Thank the gods you’re here! If I could I’d smother you in a hug right now I would!”

     The two of us bursted out laughing knowing I’d actually smother her. Before I had the chance to ask her something else, Chancellor Jaha’s voice filled the room.

     “Prisoners of the Ark, hear me now. You’ve been given a second chance. And as your chancellor, it is my hope that you see this as not just a chance for you, but a chance for all of us. Indeed, for mankind itself. We have no idea what is waiting for you down there. If the odds of survival were better, we would’ve sent others. Frankly, we’re sending you because your crimes have made you expendable.”

     Expendable? What the hell?! All I did was try to spread the word that the life-support system for the Ark was failing, after overhearing a heated discussion between Jaha, my father and others in the Council.

     “Everyone here being expendable is bullshit and you know it!” My voice echoed throughout the dropship, catching the attention of everyone in the room. I gulped at the stares thrown my way, but it was the stare of the single guard in the room that caught my eye.

     No guards were supposed to be inside. So the only reason why he’d be here would be because he was escaping something… or to protect someone. Perhaps a certain younger sister that wasn’t supposed to be born?

     It had to be Bellamy Blake, the older brother of floor girl, Octavia Blake. His gaze seemed to linger on me slightly longer than the other delinquents around. I wasn’t sure if it was due to pure curiosity or how everyone knew I was Marcus Kane’s daughter. I tore my gaze away from his blank stare and stared down at the metal ground.

     As Jaha’s speech became muffled, I gaped at the floor and the room began to groan and shake. A familiar dark-skinned young man was suddenly talking to Clarke.

     “Wells?” I questioned. His brown orbs tore away from Clarke, his gaze landing on me.

     “(Y/N)! Thank god!” He floated over to me, pulled me up to my feet and smothered me in a hug. A giggle vibrated through my chest. “What’s so funny?”

     “I told Clarke I’d smother her in a hug, yet you’ve gone and did just that to me,” I chuckled. Wells only chuckled as I hugged him back.

     “This is nice —” We both started but ended in a fit of giggles. Two other delinquents then join Wells and I in standing up. I could hear Clarke softly calling my name to sit back down along with the others standing, but I just ignored it. 

     Strangely, Wells still held on to me and sat in the seat I was in just before, plopping me onto his lap and snuggling into me more. He and I did have a weirdly affectionate friendship before both our arrests, but even this was pushing the line between friendship and a romantic relationship. 

     The dropship lurched, sending three delinquents flying who had left their seats despite Clarke’s protests. I clunged to Wells’ neck as his grip on my waist tightened, closing my eyes tight. Something sickening yet sweet filled my nose. Smoke. Sparks went off right and left and with one final violent jolt, the dropship came to a stop.

     We were on the ground!

     The dropship powers down almost instantaneously and echoes of seatbelts unbuckling filled the room. Heat rose to my cheeks as I slowly clambered off Wells’ lap. His cheeks were crimson red as were probably my own. I helped him to his feet and took one of my hands in his, leading him down to the doors, waiting for them to be to opened as a crowd formed in front.

     A dark-haired girl stormed through yelling, “Bellamy!” The guy in the uniform I saw before spun around and stared at the girl in shock. So I was right! He was Bellamy Blake and that girl was definitely Octavia, his sister.

     “My God, look how big you are!” The two smiled at each other before the girl - Octavia - jumped forward and pulled Bellamy into a tight hug.

     “Where’s your wristband?” Clarke asked Bellamy as she sided next to Wells and I.

     “Do you mind?” Octavia cut Clarke off with an annoyed look. “I haven’t seen my brother in a year.”

     “Seriously Clarke?” I jumped in, everyone’s eyes turning to me as I let go of Wells’ hand. “We’ve reached the ground and the first thing you do is ask where the guy’s wristband is?” Clarke was surprised by my outburst, but Octavia and Bellamy looked at me thankful that I stood up for them.

     “Surely you’d like to be known as someone else. Perhaps the first person on the ground in a hundred years?” Octavia grinned in appreciation whilst Bellamy nodded my way.

     I returned the smile as Bellamy pulled on a nearby lever, opening the door to the outside. As a haze of smoke breaks, a bright light shone into the ship, momentarily blinding me but the lush colours of green, blue and brown eventually took its place.

     Finally, I’d be able to put my Earth Skills to use!

     Octavia slowly made her way down the ramp before she stepped onto the ground. She turned back towards the ship, a massive grin etched on her olive face.

     “We’re back bitches!” She threw her arms up as she yelled.

     A parade of teens stormed off the ship in a hurry, yelling and screaming that we’re back. A laugh resonated in my chest as a familiar presence took my hand in theirs.

     “Together?” Wells asked. With a soft sigh, I nodded, but not before I leapt onto his back. He shook his head as he wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck.

     “Ride on my noble steed!”

     A gush of air swept through my (Y/H/C) locks as Wells sprinted out the door, but within seconds of Wells being on the ground, we both tumbled onto the grass. One glance at each other was enough to send us into a fit of laughter.

     “I missed you, Wells —”

     “I missed you, (Y/N) —” A chuckle from above broke two of us from our trance.

     “It hasn’t even been a day and you two are back to finishing each other’s sentences.” Clarke towered over Wells and I, teasingly shaking her head at us.

     “Are you really surprised at this point, Clarke?” I retorted as I jumped to my feet, smothering the blonde in a tight hug.

     “Nope!” With a quick kiss to Wells’ cheek, I sauntered off in hopes of recognising someone else. Within two minutes I had lost the motivation so I found myself a sturdy and long enough stick I could use to fashion a bow with. Someone’s shoelace would probably work for the string.

     I sat close to the dropship, carving my initials into one end of the stick with a shard of metal that had broken off the ship, when someone sat next to me.

     “Hey, you’re Marcus Kane’s daughter right?” I turned to see Octavia and nodded expectantly.

      “That I am..” I replied slightly bitter. “But you can call me (Y/N).” I held my hand out for her to shake, but she hugged me instead. To say I was surprised would be an understatement.

     “Why aren’t you angry with me? My father was one of the people that got you put in the skybox in the first place.” I asked as she pulled away.

      “Because it wasn’t you who did it. It was your dad.” Well, she wasn’t wrong about that. A mischievous look appeared on her face. “Want to get into some trouble?”

      I mirrored her expression. “Oh hell yes!” We both giggled before I grabbed her hand and lead her to the dropship. We pulled up behind Clarke and Finn, who were recruiting two other guys to head over to Mount Weather. “Can we go now?”

     “Sounds like a party, make it six,” Octavia said as she gestured between the two of us. Clarke doesn’t protest, but a certain oldest Blake does. He grabbed Octavia’s shoulder causing her to let go of my hand.

     “Hey, what the hell are you doing?” Bellamy scolded Octavia.

     “Going for a walk,” she retorted as she pulled out of his grip. “Are you coming (Y/N)?”

     I glanced from the group to Bellamy a few times, debating whether to follow along to Mount Weather or to help Bellamy around the dropship. Although I’d probably be more help with the group of five, something in my gut told me I’d be just as helpful here.

     “I’ll stay here and help Wells and Bellamy with keeping order. As I’m sure they’ll need my help” I sauntered back over to the ship, ignoring Clarke and Octavia calling my name and a gaping Bellamy.

     Throughout the day I helped Wells with pretty much everything, but as soon as the sun was near the horizon I decided to stop for the day. I wasn’t blind to Murphy trying to get people to take off their wristbands. Such an action was most likely something Bellamy put him up to as he was the only one that could benefit from it. The only question was why.

     A shadow casted to the ground by the fire told me there was someone behind me.

     “If you even think you can get the upper hand on me to get off my wristband, think again Blake.” It wasn’t a long shot if it was him, and my suspicions were proven right when the man himself sat down next to me.

     “How did you —”

     “Your shadow gave it away you idiot and only you or Murphy would dare approach me from behind. Not that Murphy has though.” He just nodded as I finally turned to him.

     Although I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction, Bellamy was handsome. His slightly tousled black hair, brown eyes and olive skin put him under the tall, dark and mysterious category. I tore my gaze away before it became borderline staring.

     “Was there anything else you wanted to talk about, Blake?” I questioned. He shifted in his spot slightly.

     “Thank you for earlier, with Octavia,” He admitted. “Although I’m certainly not a fan of your father, thank you.” Something in my gut told me he really did mean what he said.

     “I’m not heartless, Blake” I retorted. “Compared to Chancellor Jaha and everyone else on the council, I’m a puppy.” We shared a look and snorted, trying to stifle our own laughs.

     “Why a puppy?” He asked.

     “Because although I look innocent, anything can still set me off and my bite is much worse than my bark.” I stood to my feet, dusting off any dirt and sauntered back over to the dropship. 

     A couple of hours later the world was enveloped in darkness, our only source of light being from the fire. Everything in me wanted to ignore the world around me. However, the muffled sound of arguing grew louder and louder as I left my daze.

     “My father didn’t write the laws,” Wells’ voice admitted. My gaze looked up and landed on the arguing figures of Wells and Bellamy.

     “No. He enforced him, but not any more, not here,” Blake shrugged. “Here there are no laws. Here, we do whatever the hell we want, whenever the hell we want. Now, you don’t have to like it Wells. You can even try to stop it, change it, kill me. You know why? Whatever the hell we want.”

     I stood up, opening my mouth with every intention to object — at least get Wells and Bellamy to compromise on the situation — but Bellamy seemed to notice this and sharply shook his head. My eyes narrowed at him and scowled. He was taken aback by my scowl and I had no idea why.

     “Whatever the hell we want!” Murphy yelled out to the crowd. The crowd of teenager, minus Wells and I, followed in suit and started chanting the only rule established. A rule that would do more harm than good. 

     “Am I the only one who thinks this is gonna result in chaos?” I asked Wells.

     “You’re not the only one.”

     He wrapped an arm around my waist, holding me close and I rested my head on his shoulder. Something that didn’t go amiss by the eldest Blake. Bellamy’s face was unreadable and I didn’t know if it was a good thing or a bad thing.

     A low rumble echoed from above before a downpour of rain decided to settle. Our first thunderstorm. A soft sigh left my chest as a smile formed on my face. The rain felt so good and I just didn’t care about getting soaked.

     I allowed myself to enjoy the rain a little while longer, looking around at the other delinquents with a smile. My smile fades almost instantly when my eyes meet Bellamy’s dark chocolate orbs. I scowled once more at him before scavenging around for something to collect water in. He needed to know I wasn’t onboard with his so called plan.

     The handrests of the seats inside the dropship ended up being perfect. I struggled a little getting some off, but I managed. With my small collection of water troughs, I sat them outside sitting in front of me as they collected the rain water. 

     The thunderstorm didn’t last for very long, but I’m left with a few troughs filled with fresh water. I drunk some water until my thrist was satisfied and I made sure Wells got some as well. Any water-filled troughs still completely full I snuck into the dropship to hide. 

     Wells then took my hand and lead me to a tree across the clearing and we helped each other up. We sat on a thick enough branch that could hold both our weights, sitting there in silence comfortably for a couple minutes, my head resting on his shoulder. Wells was the one to break the underlying tension in the air.

     “I think we need to address the elephant in the room…” Wells trailed off. He took my hands in his and turned the both of us around, our legs dangling on either side of the branch. I could only sigh and nod.

     “I know we’ve been best friends since we were toddlers and have always been affectionate with each other, but the cuddle in the dropship got me thinking.” Our fingers threaded through each other as he spoke. “I… I want us to be be more friends.”

     My head perked up at his words. Not going to lie, I did develop a crush on Wells two years before I was chucked in the skybox. However, I never acted on it as we had been best friends for years. We grew up together and at one point I thought he had a crush on Clarke.

     “But what about Clarke?” I mumbled as he took my cheeks in his hands.

     “It’s always been you.”

     His lips melted onto my own. Although his lips were slightly chapped from dehydration they were still incredibly soft. It felt as if a fire had started in my heart and I didn’t want it to stop. We eventually had to part for air, but he quickly slammed his lips back on mine, this time his tongue slipping into my mouth. We fought for dominance over each other, but Wells ultimately won. Our lips parted once more and we panted as we caught our breath.

     Wells rested his head on my own and we both sighed.

     “I’d hug you, but I’m worried we’d fall out of the tree.” Wells chuckled and pecked my lips. “I’ll find another tree nearby to sleep, we wouldn’t want people getting the wrong idea.”

     I pecked his lips before jumping down from the tree. Almost everyone was asleep, so I walked quietly as possible to the closest tree nearby. I laid down, resting my head and back against the tree. Just as I was about to succumb to sleep a familiar presence sat down next to me.

     “To what do I owe the displeasure of having your presence, Blake.” Bellamy snorted at what I said.

     “I’m flattered you knew it was me,” he smirked.

     “Yeah, well, don’t get used to it,” I clapped back. I finally turned to his annoyingly handsome face. Gods I wanted to kiss that smirk off his face — wait what?! I kissed Wells only minutes ago and I was already thinking about kissing someone else?

     “So…” he trailed off. “You and Jaha. When did that happen?” I gaped at the thought of how to respond. 

     “We both had crushes on each other, prior to us both being thrown in the skybox,” I admitted. “Neither of us acted on it before the Ground.” He nodded, but something in his eyes told me he was disappointed about something.

     Mentioning being thrown into the skybox reminded me why I was put in there in the first place. Me trying to expose to the rest of the Ark that life-support was failing, my father being the one to chuck me inside and throw away the key. It was a cowardly move and my father knew it. He never even came to see me the utter bastard.

     “I need help taking off my wristband.” Bellamy looked at me with disbelief. “I want to take it off, but I don’t want to hurt myself.”

     He stared at me right in my eyes, probably to see with there was any hesitation in them. However, when he saw none he helped with the wristband, slipping it off with ease.

     “Thank you.” He wasn’t really supposed to hear my thanks, but he did, just giving me a small smile before he walked off in the other direction.

     My eyes glossed with water, the teardrops threatening to escape but only a single tear rolled down my cheek.

     I’m sorry, Dad.

Taglist:

@hftff-lol​ 

[bumblebeebats]

I love these; if I may add some:

Inkheart: you also own 50 empty notebooks, all too beautiful to ever write in, and have a bookshelf organized by color

Artemis Fowl: you were a Gifted Kid™️ and a real dick about it. (#same)

The Mysterious Benedict Society: you were a Gifted Kid™️ and real lonely about it. (#same) Also you definitely love puzzle games

Tamora Pierce's lady knights series: You are now a lesbian and/or trans. Congratulations!

May Bird: you have maudlin and gothic tendencies

Percy Jackson: you have ADHD. And also you were a Greek mythology kid

Kane Chronicles: you have ADHD. And you were an Egyptian mythology kid

Magnus Chase: you have ADHD, and -- you get the picture. (And if you read these in actual childhood, you are also a Baby, what the hell)

Young Wizards: You're a nerd (affectionate) with a love for worldbuilding who probably still chomps through 500 page fantasy books today

The Edge Chronicles: You are me. I've never met anyone else who read these books and it's a fucking crime

A Series of Unfortunate Events: You have a great distrust of authority figures and were always told you were "mature" for your age

Spiderwick Chronicles: How could i possibly be expected to join in and play with my peers at recess when there's so many interesting Rocks And Leafs

my opinion on you based on your childhood favorite book series

dork diaries: you own like 50 empty notebooks because you were waiting for your life to be interesting enough to keep a diary

diary of a wimpy kid: you definitely also watched regular show and played rated M games when you were like 9. the stoner of elementary school

bearenstien bears: ex-die hard christian/catholic

i survived: during literally any school drill, you hoped the real thing would happen

fancy nancy: she annoyed you so much that you became a tomboy

captain underpants: you have adhd. like seriously this book series was the first to bring up adhd by name and explain it

the minecraft handbooks: you liked mlg memes and were arguably the coolest kid out there

raina telgemeier: you're probably reallu cool rn. like genuinely

goosebumps: you were a huge edgelord in middle school and you played at least one fnaf game

[youngerdrgrey]

love me wilder (love me more) // scenes from Ryan and Sophie’s relationship

about: Mary starts all of this. They’re on comms one night, and Mary asks, “Would I be Maid of Honor, or would it be Luke?”

and other questions about Ryan and Sophie's relationship. + you can read this on ao3 too.

.

.

Who asks the other on dates? Once they’re dating, it’s pretty even, but Sophie does get the credit for their first official date. It happens on the third time that Ryan bails on plans with Sophie and Jordan. They’re supposed to be seeing an art installation for their self-proclaimed ‘Black girl date night.’ But Sophie shows up to The Hold Up to pick up Ryan, and Ryan’s tending bar with an apologetic and frustrated grin.

Sophie stomps over to the bar. “Again, Ryan?”

Ryan slides a drink to the customer beside Sophie. “Yes, again. Patrice is sick and—”

“And nobody else can cover? You’re the manager.” Sophie says. “Call someone in.”

Ryan takes the credit card from the customer, who unabashedly watches Ryan as she swipes the card in the reader. Her work tank’s tied into a crop top like always, and she’s pulled her hair back in a way that really draws the attention to her neck.

Ryan says, “I don’t abuse my power.” It’s the sort of dig that a few months ago would’ve started a fight, but today it just makes Sophie groan and dig her elbows into the bar top to get closer to Ryan.

“You don’t do anything,” Sophie corrects. At this point, Ryan's either working as Batwoman, or working at the bar. She has no social life, which kind of screws things up for the one person who's actively trying to spend time with her.

Ryan snorts. “Okay, choice words from the lady going on a date with her sister on a Friday night.”

Sophie levels Ryan with a serious stare. “I’d go with you, but you’re too busy.” Ryan rolls her eyes, but Sophie isn’t joking. There’s no hint of a smile, no hitch in her voice. Ryan rewinds the last few minutes in her head.

“Wait —” Ryan circles her hands backwards in front of her. Rewind again. Reprocess the fact that Sophie used date and Ryan in the same context. “—are you serious? You’re... you’re actually—”

Sophie chuckles, and there’s a bit of a nervous shake under it. “And I thought I was the inexperienced one here.”

“You are,” Ryan says. That gets a glare from Sophie. Ryan plucks the receipt for the customer off the printer and slides that to them before turning her focus fully back to Sophie. “But I’m game.”

Sophie grins. “Really?”

Ryan flashes a full smile back. “Yeah. As soon as Patrice gets better.”

“Let me make her some soup then, damn.”

.

.

Who is the bigger cuddler?

Ryan. She’s very affectionate, and she loves snuggling up anywhere she can. Mary complains sometimes about how often she comes home to find Ryan and Sophie on the couch.

Luke cringes when Mary says it. His eyes jump from the Bat screens to Mary in the chair beside him. “Like on the couch?” Mid-deed?

“Ugh, I wish.” Mary quickly shakes her head, as a quick disgusted look passes her face. “Not like I wish, just like…. I come home, and they’re not even doing anything. They’re asleep on the couch, just wrapped up in each other’s arms and happy and comfy and….” She sighs.

Luke drums his hands on the keyboard. “And you want that?”

Mary slumps into her chair and lets her head roll onto her shoulder. The lights paint her softer, or maybe it’s the open vulnerability now that she doesn’t have to be the perky sidekick she usually is. It’s actually one of the good things about working with Luke; he doesn’t expect her to be happy, perfect Mary.

“I want something. We spend all day living our normal lives, then rushing away to help save Gotham, and it’s totally worth it. It is. But before, when the work was done, I went home to my best friend in the world.” Mary glances up at the monitors where the two dots tracking Ryan and Sophie rush across the Gotham map. “Now she has someone else. And no offense to you, but we’re not exactly swapping secrets and having sweet potato pancakes.”

Mary does love Sophie and Ryan. She loves that Sophie is moving forward after losing Kate, and she loves that Ryan has someone other than Angelique to care about. But Mary has also spent so much of her life begging people to care about her. It’s hard not to feel like this is Kate and Beth and her dad all over again. She’s getting really tired of being replaced.

Luke clears his throat. He even sits up straighter in his chair when he turns it. The monitors behind him almost make him look like an angel. Or whatever.

He says, “I can’t make sweet potato pancakes,” like it’s an apology, or maybe a concession from someone else who knows what it’s like to be the odd one out. “But I do make a mean crab cake. If you’re in the market for more friends.”

Mary can work with that. But at the risk of this feeling entirely too sentimental for a mid-mission chat, she adds, “Fine, but no cuddling on the couch.”

Luke smiles. “You wish.”

.

.

Who initiates holding hands more often?

Ryan cannot get enough of Sophie’s hands. She’s constantly reaching out during team meetings, or across the bar at The Hold Up. She believes in the reassuring squeeze. At the same time, Sophie’s the one who actually initiates the hand holding and interlocking fingers. She claims it’s her way of keeping track of Ryan, reminding her that “you’re stuck with me, and you trust me.”

“There are other ways to show that, Sophie,” Ryan taunts. Sophie uses their linked hands to tug Ryan over to her.

“Show me?”

.

.

Who remembers anniversaries?

Ryan smiles up at Sophie on the couch. 

“Aww, babe, three years ago, you arrested me for the first time.”

Sophie rolls her eyes. “That’s the anniversary you remember?”

Ryan laughs. “It truly changed my life.”

“Okay, well, remember that when you want an anniversary present in three weeks—”

“Four,” Ryan corrects. “Three weeks is when the date should’ve happened, but you got a flat, then Black Mask attacked—”

Sophie nods, “Right, and we didn’t actually go out until after he was in holding. I stand corrected.”

Ryan preens until Sophie pushes her away.

.

.

Who is more possessive?

Ryan used to think she was possessive. She would do anything to keep the people she loves by her side. But then Kate Kane comes back into their lives, and suddenly Ryan’s on the verge of losing everything that she’s built for herself. She keeps jumping between being incredibly self-sacrificing and hoarding away her minutes with the rest of the team like Kate’s coming to snatch them away.

One particular night, Ryan drops down onto Sophie’s fire escape in the suit. Her feet barely hit the level before she spots Kate inside Sophie’s apartment. 

Sans jacket, Kate’s tattooed arms look great in the moonlight. Her everything looks great. Ryan can’t see everything, but she can see the playful smirk on Kate’s face as she crosses the living room. Sophie’s not visible, which means she must already be in the bedroom. Is she waiting for Kate? Is she --

Ryan stumbles back. Sophie wouldn’t cheat on her. Ryan knows that, but if there was ever a reason to break up, it’s definitely the love of Sophie’s life wanting to start over again. And who is Ryan to stand in the way of that?

So, Ryan grinds her teeth and jumps back off of the balcony.

 .

She gets halfway back to Wayne Tower before the comms buzz in her ear. She pauses on top of a random roof to answer the incoming call.

“Ryan, get back here.”

Of course Sophie saw her. The grappling hook isn’t exactly the quietest way to move either. Though, Sophie had certainly taken her time to reach out.

Ryan lets a bit of bitterness slip out. “Your plans with Kate fall through?”

“I don’t have plans with Kate,” Sophie says. She sounds tired and frustrated, like whatever conversation she’d had probably took a lot out of her. Or maybe just reuniting with her one true love did that. Who’s Ryan to know?

“Sure looked like it to me.”

“And if you’d looked any longer, you would’ve seen her grab her things and go. I don’t want to do this over comms, Ryan.”

“What, break up with me?”

“Why would you even —” Sophie sucks in a deep breath. “Kate was here to clear the air. She wanted to know if there was a chance that we could try again.”

Ryan needs to sit down. She needs to lean against something. Her eyes dart across the roof, but there’s nothing up here but spider webs and deflated balloons. 

“Oh.” Ryan circles her jaw to try and stop herself from crying. She’s not going to cry over Sophie. She should’ve known better than to ever think that Kate Kane’s ex would choose her over—

“I told her no.”

What? The air rushes out of Ryan’s lungs.

Sophie repeats herself. “I told her no. Now can you please get back here before I have to drive all the way over to wherever the hell you are?”

“It’s faster by roof.”

“Give me the grappling hook, and I’ll try it out.”

Ryan clicks her tongue. “Can’t do it, that’s mine.”

“And you’re mine, Ryan. Nobody’s changing that, okay? Trust me.”

Ryan glances over at the long way back to Sophie’s place. The trek across the city that they help keep safe. “I do.”

.

.

Who gets more jealous?

Sophie really wishes she weren’t this jealous. She’s not super familiar with the feeling. With Tyler, her emotions never went this high. With Kate, there either wasn’t competition, or well, the guilt of how things went overshadowed everything else. But with Ryan — hot, flirty bartender Ryan — the opportunities for jealousy keep building.

It doesn’t help that Imani shows up from time to time for different fundraiser events. Sophie watches Imani and Ryan from across The Hold Up. Her eyes narrow, and she zones out of her conversation with Mary so completely that the young medical professional ends up waving her hand in front of Sophie’s face.

Mary steps over to block Sophie’s view of them. “You do know Imani’s not a threat, right?”

Sophie nods. She taps on the side of her head. “Up here, yes. But in here….” She rubs her hand over her heart.

“Ryan’s so into you, and you know that. Any jealousy is completely ridiculous,” Mary says.

Sophie nods. Again. “I’m gonna go over there.” She knocks back the drink in her hand and hands it to Mary, who mostly just clinks that cup with her own.

Mary mumbles to herself, “’Gee, Mary, thanks for being such a great friend. Let’s keep talking together instead of rushing over like a jealous lunatic.’” Her face perks up as she plays herself. “Of course, Sophie, so glad you’re being super reasonable. Love you too.”

By the time Mary finishes her own drink, Sophie’s leading a very amused Ryan up the stairs towards the loft. Mary sighs. She really may have to move out soon.

.

.

Who is more protective?

This one’s a tie. Ryan tries to protect Sophie by sidelining Sophie on the Bat Team. But Sophie is used to being in the field, or at least calling the shots. She doesn’t do well in the Bat Cave where she can’t physically assist. That back and forth goes on for months, but it comes to a head when Ryan needs to get on a plane again to try and catch their latest bad guy of the week.

Sophie hates the idea. She refuses to let Ryan go alone, and the more that Ryan tries to fight it, the more emotional Sophie gets. Ryan assumes that Sophie’s upset because the last private Kane plane ended with Kate in Black Mask’s clutches. But Ryan’s not about to go missing. She doesn’t have enemies like that, and most importantly, as Ryan yells, “Sophie, stop treating me like this! I’m not Kate.” 

Sophie sputters before rasping out, “I know that. But the last time you flew, Ryan, you almost died too. In my arms, mind you. Forgive me for not wanting a repeat of that.”

.

.

Who is more likely to cheat?

No one’s cheating, but Ryan does have a particularly handsy customer who tries to kiss her once. 

.

.

Who dislikes PDA the most?

Sophie’s still getting used to the idea of actually having PDA with a woman, but she’s coming around.

.

.

Who kills the spider?

Both of them, but Sophie does it more often. Mostly because she doesn’t want to hear Ryan taunting her that “Sophie freaking Moore can’t handle a spider?”

.

.

Who asks the other to marry them?

Mary starts all of this. They’re on comms one night, and Mary says, “Would I be Maid of Honor, or would it be Luke?”

The question makes Ryan stumble on her landing, and Sophie crashes into her since they didn’t exactly space out on the wire as they slid from one secret warehouse to another.

Sophie catches her footing first and says, “I’m sorry, what?”

Back in the Bat Cave, Mary ignores the glare that Luke gives her. She leans closer to the mic. “Hypothetically. If you two get married, it’d be a really small ceremony. We’re not inviting Alice. And Jordan will probably be Sophie’s Maid of Honor, so I just wanted to make sure that I get to be Ryan’s.”

Luke huffs. “Then why did you ask a question if you’re calling dibs?”

Mary turns to face him. “Because you can’t call dibs. It has to be her choice.”

“But you’re leading her to pick you. It’s not fair. You were already roommates—”

“Which is exactly why it should be me—”

“But we had to work on our relationship. The growth that we had is just—”

“But you had to work on it! We clicked immediately!”

“You click with everyone!”

“I do not!”

“You do—”

Sophie and Ryan yell into the comms, “GUYS!” Mary and Luke freeze.

Ryan chances a glance at Sophie, who has not actually moved since their friends started this conversation. They’ve been together for nearly two years at this point, and honestly, they’ve both been avoiding having to talk about this. Neither of them have their moms — for very different reasons — and Sophie’s already got one failed marriage under her utility belt.

Sophie readjusts the cowl on her super suit. “Could you wait until after we’re engaged to plan a wedding?”

Ryan does a double take. “After we’re what now?”

Sophie freezes. “Well, I just mean — if things keep going well, because they’ve been going really, really well…?” The damn cowl blocks off most of her face, but Ryan knows Sophie well enough to know that her eyebrows are halfway to her hairline. That higher lilt in Sophie’s voice means she’s reaching, and nervous. Ryan’s thankful that her own mask can cover the way her eyebrows drop as her nose scrunches up. Ryan is not about to cry on this roof.

Ryan goes for the joke. Makes her voice as teasing as she can handle. “Aww, you wanna marry me?”

Sophie crosses the few steps between them to take Ryan’s hand. “Are you asking?”

Ryan interlocks their fingers. “Not officially. Luke hasn’t made a Bata-ring yet.”

Everyone groans. The deep one from Luke is enough to get Sophie to smile, and it finally breaks some of the tension in the air. Ryan brings their linked hands to her lips and kisses them. She makes sure that Sophie’s focused on her before mouthing, Marry me.

Sophie leans in to kiss her, and they both get carried away. Lost in this moment of possibility before —

“Um, guys?” It’s Luke. “Are you working or making out?”

Ryan pulls back from the kiss and says, “Just for that, Mary, you’re Maid of Honor.”

“Ha!”

.

.

Who buys the other flowers or gifts?

It’s a trade off. Ryan loves bringing back little things from missions. Sophie is the reigning gift champion though. A few weeks after she joins the team, Sophie shows up at the loft with a plant for Ryan.

“It’s no desert rose, but well, Mary said how much you loved taking care of your old one.” Sophie holds it out for Ryan to take, but Ryan just keeps staring at her. Sophie shifts her weight from one foot to the other. She cringes inwardly. She’s probably tipping her hand too much by doing this. She can’t just show up at a cute girl’s place in her casual clothes and give her a plant. It’s… well, very gay, and probably invasive, given the fact that the last plant Ryan cared for was literally the thing to bring Ryan back to life.

Sophie groans. “Please don’t make me take it back.”

“No! You don’t have to.” Ryan reaches out with both hands to take the plant. She curls it to her chest, hugging it close. She stares down at it for a bit, and when she does look back up, a teary rim frames her eyes. “Thank you.”

.

.

Who would bring up possibly having kids?

Ryan really wants to be a mom one day. She’s fine not doing it now. But one day, she wants to do for someone else what her mom did for her.

Sophie gets weird about the idea once Ryan brings it up. Like, ducking out of rooms and coming up with all kinds of excuses as to why she can’t go on missions for a week. She even stays at Jordan’s place for a few nights.

Ryan has to go to Jordan’s apartment just to talk to Sophie alone. She barrels straight into the little two bedroom and plants herself next to the kitchen island. Sophie closes the door behind Ryan, but doesn’t step any closer to her fiance. 

Ryan says, “I get it. If Batwoman can’t have a girlfriend, then she sure as hell can’t have a kid. But—”

Sophie cuts her off, “It’s not about Batwoman. It’s about me.”

“Oh.” Does Sophie not want kids?

“Before I came out, the thought of having kids and a family, it all felt so… not me. I told Tyler that I didn’t want kids, that I thought having kids in a city like Gotham was irresponsible and not something I would ever want to do.”

Ryan leans back into the island. Closes her eyes and tries to let the cool feel of the granite calm the pain of those words.

Sophie wrings her hands together. “But I honestly didn't want to do any of that, with a man. And you're right. It's completely irresponsible for Batwoman to have a kid. But maybe… maybe Ryan and Sophie Wilder-Moore could consider it. If we can help clean up a city, we can probably raise a pretty cool kid.”

.

.

Who is more nervous to meet the parents?

Sophie is literally shaking when they meet up with Diane Moore for the first time. 

Thanks to Jordan, Ryan technically met Diane the week before. Ryan and Jordan were hanging out when Diane FaceTimed Jordan. Once Diane saw Ryan in the background, Jordan casually said, “That’s Ryan, Sophie’s girlfriend.” Then Diane’s entire face caught on fire, and she made an excuse to hang up. Fast forward five days, and Diane called Sophie to say she was “stopping by” for brunch. Reservations were made for four, and now Sophie is going to vibrate into another dimension from shaking so much.

Jordan and Ryan split a sympathetic look outside of Grits and Bear It, one of the best brunch places in Gotham.

Jordan tries to help. She says, “Just don’t mention the ex-con thing, and you’ll be fine.”

Sophie groans. Ryan steps up to Sophie and slips her arms around Sophie’s waist. “Babe, chill. I am a successful manager of a great bar—”

“A gay bar,” Sophie corrects.

Jordan winces. “Don’t mention that part either. Or Batwoman.”

Both Sophie and Ryan freeze. Sophie turns wide eyes up at Jordan and asks, “Why would we…?”

Jordan looks back at them like they’re five. “Because all you do is talk about how Batwoman’s the one person doing anything to help Gotham. And Mom still won’t say her name without gagging in her mouth.”

Sophie drops her head back down on top of Ryan’s. With their height difference, she can press her forehead to the crown of Ryan’s head. Hide away from the world for a moment. Whisper, “We should run. Now. Before she sees us.”

Ryan kisses Sophie on the cheek. “Maybe it won’t be that bad.”

.

(It is.)

.

(But thankfully Jordan takes one for the team and brings up her graffiti to take some of Diane’s fire. Ryan’s able to get one of very few smiles when she reminds Diane that Jordan’s working at the youth center now. Saving lives and what not. Still, nothing is enough for Diane. Ryan holds Sophie’s hand under the table.)

.

(Sophie doesn’t relax until they’re back at her place. Until they showered away the tension and curled up on the couch with Sophie wrapped around Ryan and a cheesy action movie playing on the TV.

Sophie holds on a little too tight. Sits a little too stiff. And she sniffles during a chase scene, which is really the final straw.

Ryan has to tuck her head under Sophie’s chin to look up at her girlfriend. “It’s her loss, you know? I’m pretty damn amazing, and you? You’re Sophie freaking Moore, and anyone who chooses not to love you is making the worst mistake of their life.”

Sophie sniffles again. “What if she never comes around?”

“Then you still have me, and Jordan, and Mary and Luke. You can even have Alice if you’re that desperate for a high head count. But you don’t need her to be happy.” Ryan wiggles out of the hold to sit up on her own. “And whenever you start worrying about what your mom thinks, just remember what the great poets once said.”

Sophie’s eyes narrow, and Ryan does her best to keep a serious look on her face.

“‘All I need in this life of sin—’” Sophie shoves Ryan away from her, and Ryan uses all of her strength to pull Sophie into her arms and sing right into her face, “‘is me and my girlfriend.’ Come on, baby, you know it.”

Sophie sings back, “‘It’s me and my girlfriend.’”

“See.” Ryan pecks Sophie on the lips. “That simple. Trust me.”

Sophie says, “I always do.”)

.

.

.

.

a/n: if only it were actually that sample. but hey, we can hope, and we can keep trying, you know?

so, what'd you think? any other random questions y'all would like answered? any prompts?

[toukenramblings]

Child Saniwa: Azuki Nagamitsu, Ichigo Hitofuri, Horikawa Kunihiro

Ah shit y’all, back at it again with the memes. Thank you for requestin, love~!

Azuki Nagamitsu

“I am pleased to meet you, my name is Azuki Nagamitsu...”

“....”

Azuki takes one goddamn look at this baby saniwa and is immediately claiming it as his child. Yes he’ll fight the entire citadel to stake his claim, he’s signing the adoption papers right now. No you cannot stop him. He can and will hold all of these children. He has big enough and strong enough arms.

“Pray tell, little one, do you like sweet things?”

“!!!”

Oh Azuki is a bit of an enabler. He does cook and bake a lot so expect him to sneak a lot of sweets and stuff to the lil kid. He already does it with the little ones around the citadel but even more so if he has a close relationship with the child saniwa. Yes he will ensure that they eat healthy and go to bed on time and maybe he’ll bribe them with sweets to finish their chores on time and all but hey, he does care for them a lot!

Azuki always calls them adorable, cute, and so on and so forth. He adores kids and maybe he has a photo album of adorable pictures of the lil saniwa and the rest of the kids around the citadel just napping together and sleeping together and holding hands and being cute, no he’s not crying.

HIs favorite thing to do with the kid is to go shopping with them! Holding their hand as they walk through whatever aisles they are looking at. Yes maybe he’ll sneak some of their favorite treats into the shopping cart, and maybe he’ll have to curb the child’s habit of snacking on everything but he caves in the end. He’s weak to their puppy eyes. Please help him, he might not be strong enough.

Is that one parent at a recital or something of their child’s with a video camera, crying, and screaming: “YOU’RE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE”

Azuki isn’t much of a fighter, it doesn’t mean he won’t fucking throw down with the government though. Watch him invite them over for a spot of tea and if they even make a damn negative comment about his master he’ll probably drop some poison in there. No he won’t he’ll just hug the kid closer to him and be that one meme of protecting Kevin Hart.

Azuki is already giving out head pats to all of the kids in the citadel, but to the Saniwa he’s rather physically affectionate. If they want a hug, they can get one. If they wanna hold hands? Hell yeah! Forehead kisses? Damn right he will. Loves giving them head pats and calling them a good kid the most.

Yes he will read them a bedtime story and of course it’s always ones filled with good morals and life lessons!

Azuki is also damn good with sewing. He will make little scarves, and patch up the clothing for the saniwa and even make some clothing for them! He loves it when they are warm and comfy in whatever clothing they like!

Yes Azuki spoils them rotten but he knows his limits. He is the typical overly proud dad who is happy whenever his kid is happy!

Ichigo Hitofuri

"I am Ichigo Hitofuri, the only tachi crafted by Awataguchi Yoshimitsu-”

“....”

“....”

The minute Ichi-nii sees this lil kid is his master, he is already bending down to their level and asking where the fuck are their parents. He’s a bit shocked to see someone so young to be his master but he won’t mind. He does have a LOT of little brothers after all! He can take care of them, adding another lil sibling into the bunch won’t hurt anyone!

Adoption papers? Signed? Awataguchi? Accepting of their new sibling. Government? uNFORTUNATELY STILL ALIVE. He knows what it’s like to have trauma and some of his lil bros do have quite a bit of it. Honebami, Yagen to name a few, and pushing such a duty on to such a young person like this...Ichigo won’t lie and say that he isn’t angry at the government for doing this. They don’t deserve this, why can’t they live their life out as a normal kid????

Oh Ichigo has experience in taking care of children and his brothers will also pitch in to make sure that the Saniwa is loved for and taken cared of! They have an army of tantous, two wakizashis, and a tachi at their beck and call now. No one is going to hurt them ever again.

Like Azuki, Ichigo adores children and this little saniwa is no different. Yes he’s rather stern at times and he doesn’t like raising his voice at them but he does need to be a guiding hand at times. He would never hurt them, and he just wants the best for them. He may get angry at them and scold them but he is doing it gently.

Yes the little saniwa is going to get roped into AWT48. Ichigo will personally help them sing and dance as well! If they have stage fright, no worries! He’s happy to still perform for them none the less.

Cuddles. Oh man this little saniwa is never going to be without physical affection. From Ichigo’s cuddles and head pats to the rest of the Toushirous just loving on the kid and random hugs outta nowhere, this kid is going to be so loved. 

Ichigo can kinda cook? Not as good as like Kasen or Azuki or anything but he’ll at least make something edible. Probably some instant stuff from a box, more like it. He can decorate it super good though!

If the kid has nightmares, Ichigo is the first to wake up and comfort them. His bros have nightmares a lot and he’s a light sleeper anyway, so he can relate to that - and is always there for them!

Bedtime stories with morals and lessons? Of course! Duh! It’s a group storytime! All day every day!

Ichigo is the big brother everyone wants. The caring big bro who will take a bullet for you, and will probably have some choice words for the government. He cares for you as a parent would, and is just always there!

Horikawa Kunihiro

“Excuse me, has-”

“....”

“....Ah, a second child to take care of.”

Horikawa already has a child on his hands kane-san and he’s already pretty motherly so adopting a kid like this isn’t too out of his range. He’s a lot gentler with them than he is with Kane-san, but no less strict.

No he cannot trust Kane-san around this child. ONe time he left them alone and the kid was stuck in a tree and Kane-san had a broken leg trying to save the damn kid. He will only let them interact under his or another sword’s supervision. Can and will fight Kane-san just to protect this kid.

As Horikawa is good at cleaning, he always tends to the kid’s room and helps them wake up on time. He will most likely be the hawk mum, watching over them with every change he can get to ensure that they are doing their work on time.

He won’t spoil them as much as Ichigo or Azuki would, but he would praise them and reward them in his own way! Mostly with praise and a head pat and a forehead kiss if they’ve been extra good! Yes he’ll cook for them and give them treats but nothing super duper big.

The minute the saniwa calls him Hori-nii or something he will cry. Hell he’ll take being called mom. He doesn’t mind! He’s just happy that he can be there for them!

Oh dude Horikawa will spoil them not with food but with lil things! A flower from the forest, a lil trinket from the store as he passed by, so on and so forth! He knows his limits though.

Yes Horikawa will not hesitate to storm the government building and demand to see whoever the fuck is in charge. He wants to know who the fuck was responsible for this. This is a literal CHILD, where are their PARENTS. Who aLLOWED THIS? Horikawa is now this child’s mom.

He’s like that mom that panics whenever the kid goes missing for like one second. There’s a lot of dangerous things the kid could get into (see the tree incident) and if they get hurt, expect Horikawa to be at their side quicker than Hasebe. Hell he can beat Hasebe in speed and in over-protectiveness, dO NOT TEST THIS YOUNG MAN.

Is also that one mom that is at the kid’s recital, crying joyous tears of pride as they perform. Always has a camera on him to capture such a beautiful moment.

Yes Horikawa is the mom friend and he will not hesitate to become the mom to this saniwa. He will ensure that they go to bed on time and keep them healthy. Will wake them up on time and just be that one parent who is always a presence in their life, knowing when to back away but keeping in touch. Like having ya mum as ya best friend!!!

[thelillykane]

i’m so full of love i could barely eat 

Logan/Veronica. What should’ve happened in 4.08. 

title taken from work song by hozier. the “come on, lover boy” is, obviously, a reference to dirty dancing. 

“Oh, shit,” Logan scrunched his face up at the alert on his phone. “that street cleaning thing is today.” 

Veronica glanced over amused. “Since when do you care about street cleaning?” 

“Since someone gave me a very long lecture on wasteful spending,” he tossed his phone onto the bed and kissed her dizzy on the lips. “I’m gonna go move your car, I’ll be right back.”

“You’re just doing this because you know I’m winning and you need a chance to regroup your argument.” 

“Sedona does not count as a real honeymoon,” Logan said flatly. 

“It’s a renowned relaxation destination!” Veronica countered. “People go there all the time.” 

Logan rolled his eyes and pushed the window open. “Sedona’s a total joke, it’s just republicans pretending to commune with nature.” 

“That’s ridiculous —“ Veronica started, but Logan interrupted her with a peck on the lips. 

“I’m going down to move the car. You can shout your argument at me through the window. You know,” he waggled his eyebrows at her. “like we’re an old married couple.”

Veronica couldn’t contain the smile that broke across her face. “You’re gonna lose!” She called out after him as Logan disappeared through the door, tossing her an affectionate smirk over his shoulder as he went. 

Logan raised a hand to shield his eyes from the sun and headed straight for Veronica’s car. 

“Sedona’s one of the most beautiful places in the world,” Veronica called through the window. 

He snorted. “Arizona’s not part of the world.” 

“Are you kidding me? What about the grand freaking canyon?” 

Logan laughed, loud and bright, nearing the car door and reaching out for the door handle. 

“Psssst,” Veronica whispered behind him, and he turned to look, sure she was leaning half of the window, showing him a picture of the grand canyon and smiling triumphantly because she knew she had him. 

Veronica wasn’t at the window.   

Lilly Kane was standing at the street corner, shimmering, a  wicked smile on her lips. 

“Come here, lover boy,” Lilly commanded, and then she turned and slipped around the corner. 

Logan followed.

// 

“Look at this,” Veronica ran to the window, a picture of the grand canyon pulled up on her laptop. “Look at this and tell me Arizona’s not part of the world.”   

She leaned out the window, eager to demonstrate her being right and his being wrong, but the street was empty. She frowned, placing the laptop on the floor beside her, and stretched out on her tiptoes, craning her neck out the window and scanning for any sign of Logan. 

She knew he didn’t care about a seventy dollar ticket for street cleaning! Which could only mean that he had a surprise planned for her. 

Veronica smiled. 

The world blew up.

// 

The EMTs wrapped them both firmly in shock blankets and told them in no uncertain terms that they were to remain in the ambulance, which was kind of a relief, since Veronica’s nerves were shot to absolute hell and she could feel Logan pulsating next to her. 

The explosion had knocked her backwards, against the bed, and she’d thought-- 

Veronica reached over and squeezed Logan’s hand firmly, grounding herself on his touch. Nothing had happened to him. He was here and he was safe and nothing had happened. 

Logan knocked her gently with his shoulder, responding to the desperation in her touch. Then, tentatively, 

“You really....didn’t check the car after giving him a ride?” 

“What kind of detective do you take me for?” Veronica spat, wounded. “Of course I checked the car.”

Logan was still a moment, taking that in, and then he jerked next to her, scrambling to try and exit to ambulance, but Veronica gripped his arm tight. 

“Don’t,” Veronica urged. “Let’s worry about it later.” 

“Somebody tried to fucking kill you and you want me to worry about it later?”  

“Yes.” 

Logan looked her face over and relented, scooting back to sit next to her, his leg pressed up against hers, radiating his warmth and his life.

Veronica wiggled herself under his arm and laid her head against his chest, listening to the sound of his heartbeat and relaxing against the steadiness of his breathing. “Hey,” she said, remembering. “Where’d you go anyway? How’d you know to get away from the car?” 

Logan rubbed his palms together and shifted anxiously beside her. “I saw Lilly.” 

Veronica was silent. 

“What? Nothing about how therapy’s clearly a scam?” He raised his eyebrows at her. “I don’t even rate a you-see-dead-people joke?”

Veronica smiled and shook her head. “I used to see her all the time,” she confessed. “Lilly’s the one who stopped me from getting on that school bus.” 

Logan tried to laugh, shaky, and sagged against her with relief, pressing a fervent kiss at the top of her head. 

Veronica grabbed his hand and pressed a kiss quick into the palm of his hand. She could’ve lost him today. Would’ve lost him, forever, and never been able to get him back. Tears rushed her and she blinked hard trying to will them away. 

“I’ll try. The therapy thing. I’m not making any promises and I’m not saying it’ll work but,” her voice broke. “if it’s so important to you I’ll try. I’ll go.” 

Logan said nothing, just wrapped his arms tight around her and pulled her close against his chest, gently brushing her tears away. 

“I can’t believe I finally got off of Lilly’s shit list,” he joked, pressing a soft kiss to her temple, and then to her jawline, and then to her earlobe. 

Veronica shifted so that she could see his face —drink in the freckles smattering across his nose, the crinkles around his eyes, the dimples he got whenever he smiled, and that stupid. fucking. mouth.

She reached out and placed her hands gentle on either side of his face. “She must’ve known you were gonna be okay.”

Logan drew in a sharp, ragged breath and started to cry. 

“I love you so much,” Veronica told him, still holding his face so he couldn’t look away. “So much. And I know these past few months have been hard and I’m sorry, but I promise I’m gonna be better.” 

Logan let out a watery laugh. “You’re stealing my material, Mars.” 

Veronica surged up against him, kissing him frenzied and hungry and sweet. 

Logan responded in kind, his hands anchoring at her hips while she grabbed fistfuls of his hair and kissed every inch of exposed skin she could get to until she was breathless from it. 

“Just you wait until we’re out of this EMT van,” Veronica promised, nipping at his jaw. “I’m going to fuck your brains out.”  

Logan grinned and kissed her soft on the tip of the nose. “Looking forward to it.”

“I can’t believe I almost lost you.”

Logan shook his head. “You’re never gonna lose me.”

“But I almost-“ 

“You know,” Logan cut her off. “a long time ago this pesky girl told me that everything was gonna be okay, that she could feel it.” 

Veronica rolled her eyes, jabbing him gently in the stomach with her elbow. She could almost remember the conversation, they were spinning in a hallway and Logan’s hands were warm and wide. 

“And was she right?” 

“The pesky girl? No, she was a total idiot.” 

“Logan!” she gasped, swatting at his arm, scandalized. 

He grinned down at her, fond and wholly unrepentant. “Yes,” he amended, swallowing his laughter. “She was right.” 

“Damn straight she was,” Veronica grumbled and then poked Logan hard in the chest before he could retort. “And no- I didn’t just call myself pesky.” 

“Whatever you say bobcat,” Logan preened and then kissed her, slow and sweet, melting like honey against her mouth.

[dakotacarver]

UPDATED: SEPTEMBER 22nd, 2020

@tupeloextras

KANE // 24 // SHE/HER // EST

DISCORD: whiskey#6583

I work nights so my replies on the dash and in discord are kind of all over the place time-wise

DAKOTA CARVER

Full Name: Dakota Keaton Carver

Nickname(s): Kota, DK

Birthday: April 23rd, 1987 (33) 

Hometown: Tupelo, Mississippi 

Education: Tupelo High School 

Occupation: Former Marine, Mechanic 

Faceclaim: Max Thieriot 

Content Warning(s): 

Death, Military Death, Military Injury, Suicide, 

BACKGROUND: 

Born & Raised in Tupelo, MS 

From a long line of military men, the sons were not expected to serve but it was heavily implied from the family history that they were destined to serve 

Took “work hard, play hard” to heart as a kid

Definitely pretty wild growing up, nothing too irresponsible, but he was definitely someone who liked to be the life of the party 

He has always taken a liking to working hands-on with anything, so working on vehicles was always fun for him. School on the other hand... not so much 

Got anything on 4-wheels stuck (took it as a challenge) 

The Carver family is quite traditional and has always ensured that the children, while being able to have quite a bit of what they want, were also given a work ethic to get what they want for themselves

This method caused Dakota to start working the minute he could. He probably mowed your grandmother’s lawn a few times as a child. He also had a paper route when he was younger so he could save up and have money for things that he wanted to buy

Dakota has a younger sister named Brooklyn 

MILITARY SERVICE: TW Death, Military Death, Military Injury, Suicide

Dakota enlisted and went off to be a Marine at 18 and stayed in for 12 years 

He was overseas and saw combat more than once in the Middle East 

Overseas was tough mentally and physically, but Dakota would be damned to let anyone know about it especially if it made them look at him as less or made anyone feel bad for him as it was his choice to proudly serve

A close friend of his was KIA overseas and he was a member who had to assist in retrieving the friend’s body

During that event Dakota had been injured by shrapnel but had not noticed until they had retrieved the body 

His injury did not impair his ability to serve and he was back on duty as soon as he was considered healed/medically able 

Another friend of Dakota’s was discharged from the military and after being home for 2 months he ended his life and left behind a wife and young daughter 

Years later when Dakota was overseas again he was shot. This injury would be the one that impaired his service and he was medically discharged. He was also eligible for an honorable discharge which he received.

Before he left he was assisted by the group called Paws of War to bring home a dog that he had found while in Afghanistan. The puppy was found in an empty pocket beneath a bunch of rubble and was affectionately named “Roo” (from Winnie the Pooh) as Dakota wold keep her in the front of his sweatshirt or in the pocket of a hoodie before she got too big. 

PERSONALITY:

Dakota is pretty happy-go-lucky for the most part. He is friendly, likes to help, and generally makes a pretty good friend who would be there for you no matter what.

Believes in hard work and that it will eventually pay off whether or not it seems like it will at the time. 

Work hard, play harder 

Be kind, go to church (because it’ll make your mama happy) 

Not any type of “player” in any sense of the word. He might not be the brightest guy out there, but he definitely tries his hardest and cleans up pretty well 

Still likes being wild sometimes, but it’s only a fraction of what it used to be like 

FAST FACTS:

Dakota loves tomatoes

Again, being hands on is the best method of learning for Dakota so cooking has been kind of a fun adventure to get into (not gonna be on Hell’s Kitchen anytime soon, but he’s more impressive in the kitchen than you’d initially imagine) 

He has an older body Silverado named “Carmen” who has probably pulled out a lot of locals and tourists alike from bad backroads and ditches 

Loves hunting, fishing, off-roading, and just plain ol’ sitting on the front porch after a long day at work with a beer in hand  

CONNECTIONS: 

Friends! Childhood, High School, Military, anything 

Enemies! (He hates Jack Dunn so you can all disagree or agree with him on that) 

Other Veterans

Car/Truck People

Other Mechanics

Ex-Girlfriend who wanted to change everything about him but couldn’t (x), (x)

Ex-Girlfriend who was “the one” or something, let’s make it sad (x)

Let’s make it sadder (x) 

All of it 

[kitt-rider]

my emotional journey of the episode ‘knightmares’. i have A Lot To Say

so kitt and michael’s first interaction after michael loses his memory is this

kitt: michael? michael please, stop! it's me! kitt! *chase ensues, kitt leaps over something to get to michael* michael: *shoots at kitt in panic* alright out! hands away from your body! kitt: this is not quite the reunion i'd hoped for michael... michael: i said; get out of the car! kitt, sounding hurt: michael, have you really forgotten me? michael: has small flashbacks to kitt jumping kitt: are you alright? michael: no! no, i'm confused! nothing makes sense to me any more, this face, is not my face! my whole world has disappeared and now i'm talking to a car kitt: i think i can explain everything, michael michael: how do you know my name? kitt: we're partners you and i, we're a team. please, let me help you. get in michael: no thanks kitt: as you pointed out, i'm only a car. please. trust me 

and it. it’s a lot. there’s so much emotion in kitt’s voice here, like. something i’ve noticed is that they’ve grown so close that if they’re apart for too long, or don’t know what the other is doing or where they are or how they are, they freak out. if the watch breaks, or loses connection, they get really thrown off kilter, both of them. they’re so entwined that they feel lost without the other, as though they’ve become two halves of a whole. 

kitt sounds really hurt when he realises michael has forgotten him. this is the most human we’ve seen kitt so far, not that he hasn’t been before, but the emotional range in his vocals are just. they’re so raw and it’s so clear to anyone, even if this were to be the only episode they watched, that the two of them have something really special, that the two of them love each other. but then michael has little flashes of kitt jumping. it starts to come back to him. this is a big deal because it’s the first instance of him remembering something. kitt is so deeply embedded in him that his brain automatically responds quicker and easier to kitt, and kitt is a stronger trigger than anything else has been so far. 

kitt speaks very softly, coaxing michael with gentle words of love. the “trust me” absolutely killed me, idk why. maybe because michael DID end up trusting kitt and getting in, or maybe because it was just the gentleness of kitt’s words. i just. hnnnng.

so then michael gets in, freaks out, they go to the foundation, devon and april try to talk to him, they can’t, so he leaves. kitt follows. and the next interaction is this

*kitt is following michael who wants him to go, eventually they stop and michael opens the door* michael: i'd tell you to get this through your head but you're a machine, so run this through your data processor. get lost! kitt: i can't do that michael. i'm programmed to respond to your needs. despite your being unaware of it, you need me! michael: what if i don't want you? kitt: ...i suppose i'll be quite hurt  michael: ...alright. it is pretty hard to get around without a set of wheels. alright. i drive from here on kitt: absolutely. providing you'll promise me one thing michael: what? kitt: please do not refer to me as a car, or a set of wheels. it's most demeaning. i'm the knight industries two thousand. *wistfully* you always called me kitt...

OOF!!! mega oof! kitt can't stand michael calling him a machine because it's not right, his michael always treats him as a person, always calls him kitt, always refers to him as if he were a human bc kitt does have a soul, and he has personality like one. he's not used to michael being so standoffish and mean (although it's not really michael's fault since he's probably freaking out, and also it's like he's reverted to when he first met kitt when he didn't understand that kitt isn't just a machine) so he's. hurt. and his voice is all soft and wistful. it hurts for michael to refer to him as “machine” or even a “car”, because for so long michael has called him buddy, pal, or kitt, as kitt himself said. and it’s important to kitt that that continues, because he loves michael very much, and the thought that their relationship might not be as close as it once was is something he can’t bear. 

and then they drive and all that, we get michael literally calling kitt hot, and kitt smugly replying that he knows. and then on the way, more conversation and. 

michael: you know it's a terrible feeling, every time i pass a mirror or i see a reflection in the window... i see a stranger's face kitt: i wish i could help you regain your memory. especially your memory of ME. ...we have quite a history together

GOD. it's so much. it's all so much!!!!! kitt is desperate for michael to remember him, not just cause he's programmed for michael's sake, but bc he wants michael to remember him specifically, as he says. kitt is going all ways out of professional this episode, and his voice is just. especially when he says the history part, it's so, so soft and full of love and yearning. i can't get over them, honestly. the episodes where kitt is reprogrammed or removed from the car and where michael loses his memory are quickly becoming my favourites, mostly bc there's so much affection and love between them in it. like. their bond is so strong, and these episodes like to prove that that bond breaks through everything.

kitt wouldn’t say he wanted michael to specifically remember him over everything else if it were simply his programming/in a professional sense, which means he wants michael to remember him for HIM. because having a human he’s imprinted on so much feel indifferent to him is just awful, and insulting to the hell and high water they went through.

gahhhh and then! they get to the dam and michael gets in trouble, and goes “kitt! i need you!” and kitt excitedly goes “it’s about time!” AND I!!!! aside from the fact that “i need you” as a general phrase is A Lot to me, because i associate it with “i love you” and in fact, sometimes i need you is even more of a romantic gesture to say than i love you, it’s just so sweet how excited kitt is that things are falling back into place, that his michael is his michael again, and they’ll be a team once more.

then they head off, and kitt shows off his analyser and michael. “you.. .are a regular wonder on wheels, aren’t you?” and kitt “i like to think so”

AND THEN. AND THEN?!

michael: kitt? you said you knew me before the accident. what was michael knight like? kitt, softly and full of love: michael knight was bright, agile, often quite logical. he was also stubborn, impatient, readily distracted by pretty girls. and he listened to possibly the most appalling music to ever shatter my airwaves michael: sounds like my kinda guy kitt: yes that’s what i’m afraid of

and this interaction is so... affectionate? so loving. even though michael is still trying to remember, he smiles automatically, even jokes around a little. kitt analyses the material and then michael says he’s impressed. and then i get a damn BOMB dropped on me.

michael: kane’s? i’m impressed! i mean how does a chemical analyser identify a store? kitt: it didn’t! there’s a card inside michael, smiling: good work kitt kitt: oh one other thing about michael knight michael: what’s that? kitt: i was extremely fond of him

like. i have no words. it’s all right there. i can’t really say any more than what kitt did. and he says it as though it’s a fact. he says it as a way to describe michael, bc now, kitt is a part of michael, and everything that embodies him. kitt loves michael, and it’s a fact. it’s an identifier of who michael knight is. michael knight is someone kitt loves very much.

michael tries to get into a building that’s locked. kitt unlocks it

michael: should i say thanks? kitt: if you do i’ll say ‘you’re welcome’ michael: thanks! kitt; de nada (no problem, no need for thanks, you’re welcome)

god! can they BE any cuter? their interactions are so precious. 

once again we get an “i need you” from michael. i love that. it looks like from now on, that will be a regular thing, bc michael’s only just started saying it a couple of eps ago. something else i love is that the two of them fit back together quickly and easily. they’re already acting as a unit/as they did before not long after they’ve started working together again. they also bicker again, and it falls naturally into place.

michael: i got a hunch that door is not gonna stand in our way kitt: michael this is beginning to sound like old times! 

and then

that’s michael’s expression in response. a warm, wide smile. things are coming together again. he’s starting to remember kitt.

AND THEN

kitt: michael i pride myself on never pointing out the obvious, but i’m afraid we’re driving into a trap michael: i’m not worried kitt, i have an edge. a secret weapon kitt: really? what is it? michael: you

and then kitt blushes!!! for sure! there’s no other way to see it! he’s blushing not only from being a little flustered that michael’s praising him like he did before, but also because even a little while of michael not being affectionate and loving towards him was awful and he’s so happy that michael is becoming more and more like his old self again that his “cheeks” glow with happiness. ugghgngn!!! god. so much! they are so much, and so in love.

so the girl is saved and everything is well. he regains his memory, and we end on michael and kitt being all domestic and married-coupley.

kitt: welcome back michael. i thought as a little present i’d play you some of that appalling music you like so much michael: thanks buddy. come on. let’s shatter some airwaves! *music plays* michael: you know i was thinking. i could have april install an electronic board here and she could hook it up to your speakers kitt: michael? michael: yeah? kitt: don’t press your luck michael: whatever you say pal, whatever you say

AND!! THAT IS JUST SO. coupley! hhhhhhh. and ofc, michael will take kitt on vacation. i was wondering for a moment if he wouldn’t, but that was dumb. of course michael will take kitt with him! he can’t stand to be apart from him! they both can’t stand it!

god. i kind of want to write a little ficlet of the vacay, and i probably will, because i am SO full of fluff. golly. what an episode! michael and kitt are in love and as the show goes on that just becomes more and more apparent <3

[criticalwinking]

ML Kennedy explains NXT WarGames!

Your guide to Saturday’s NXT: Takeover Chicago WarGames!

 Currently, only four matches are listed. Survivor Series is also this weekend, which is all about (ugh) brand supremacy and hangs over everything like a wrestling Sword of Damocles. It’s Raw vs. Smackdown vs. NXT and is basically like the wrestling pro-bowl. You know, if in the NFL a team of Bears and Packers had to pretend to like each other in order to interrupt a game between the Jets and Dolphins to show the superiority of the NFC North over the AFC East?

 Match one – Standard Match: Matt Riddle vs. Finn Bálor

Matt Riddle is a stoner dude-bro who wears flip flops to the ring and wrestles barefoot. Somehow he is likable enough to be the good guy here. Riddle is also a legit MMA guy who is freakishly strong and has a twitter feud where he dunks on former WCW champ Goldberg.

 Finn is a skinny Irish guy who looks like he has never touched a carb in his life. He’s a former Universal Champion on the main roster who has come back to NXT to get his mojo back. Somehow, this process involves being a dickhead to everybody. You know he’s officially a bad guy because he performed the bad guy NXT ceremony (i.e. beating the shit out of Johnny Gargano.)

 They are fighting because Finn says that NXT has been overrun with children since he left. Man-child Matt Riddle takes umbrage to that statement.

 Match two – Triple Threat: Pete Dunne vs. Damian Priest vs. Killian Dain

Pete Dunne is an Englishman who likes nothing more than to break people’s fingers. He is a tough guy and weighs less than 15 stone, therefore he is called the Bruiserweight.

 Damian Priest is a tall, tattooed, and lanky Latino. His gimmick is that he looks like a vampire and shoots invisible arrows (question mark). He’s relatively new to the brand and trying to make a name for himself despite being the oldest guy in the match.

 Killian Dane is basically a human/grizzly bear hybrid from Northern Ireland. He was part of an Anarchist group called Sanity that got called up to the main roster and promptly forgotten about. He likes to hang out in dark rooms and project movies.

 Priest and Dunne have had some matches where each one has won by hitting the other in the dick. Dunne passed Dain on the ramp once, didn’t like how he looked at him, and broke Dain’s fingers. Dain and Priest hate each other because each of them wants to murder Dunne and they are. . . bad at sharing, I guess.

 Match three – WARGAMES: Rhea Ripley, Candice LeRae, Tegan Nox, and Mia Yim vs. Shayna Baszler, Io Shirai, Bianca Belair, and Kay Lee Ray

 This is the first Wargames match. Wargames is like a tag team match, but with no tags. There are two rings next to each other with one oblong cage covering the whole thing.

 The first team are the goodies and the second team are the baddies.

 Rhea Ripley is the team captain of the goodies. She’s a badass, kinda butch lady who wears a leather jacket to the ring. She’s the tallest one of these ladies at 5’9” and has a pair of shoulders like Captain America. (It’s a trick though, she’s Australian.) She was the women’s champ on NXT UK, which is a thing, and now she is on NXT USA which is just called NXT. She wants a shot at Shayna’s NXT women’s title.

 Candice LeRae is a blonde lady and a very good wrestler. She’s finally been allowed to be a character on the show aside from Johnny Gargano’s concerned wife. She’s a white meat babyface who likes to stand up to bullies or whatever. LeRae was helping out Io Shirai when Shirai was feuding with Shayne Baszler. Io lost that feud and snapped, which lead to Io beating the hell out of Candice and turn full supervillain. Candice had a shot at Shayna’s title, but came up a little short.

 Tegan Nox is recently back from a long-ish injury. She’s Welsh, likes to kick, and has an infatuation with Kane. She is friends/ partners with a fellow kick enthusiast named Dakota Kai. (Kai was not invited onto the team because Shayna Baszler always eats her lunch and has done some sort of long term psychological damage to her psyche. Nox’s response to this was basically, “sorry your mom wouldn’t let you go to the prom, anyways here is my dress.”)

 Mia Yim is a black and Asian lady with blue hair. She calls herself HBIC and pretends the B stands for Baddie. Yim basically took Dakota Kai’s spot by not being afraid of Shayna Baszler. Yim came close to beating Shayna a few months ago by taking every short cut in the book and basically cheating her ass off. Shayna has previously offered Yim a job as one of her flunkies. (Shayna has two flunkies, neither of which she trusts enough to put on her WarGames team.)

Shayna Baszler is the captain of the baddies. She’s a badass, kinda butch lady who wears a leather jacket to the ring. Shayna is Ronda Rousey’s friend and basically better than her. She has been champion forever now, and hasn’t really lost a match to anybody that is still in NXT. Shayna is my birthday twin and sounds like Binky Barnes (1) when she talks. She’s the best.

 Io Shirai, the genius of the sky, is a tiny Japanese lady who is basically the most dangerous person on the show. She will murder you. She hates Candice LeRae because Candice tried to be her friend. She recently busted up Mia Yim’s nose with a ladder. She and Rhea have been in each other’s faces a lot as both think they deserve to be number one contender to Shayna’s title. I would not expect her to work well with others.

 Bianca Belair is the E S T of NXT. She calls herself this as she proclaims to be the greatest, strongest and other words that end with those three letters. She is incredibly strong and athletic, and she will whip you with her long ass braid if you get on her nerves. She also thinks she should be the number one contender to Shayna’s title and came as close to beating Shayna as anybody not named Kairi Sane. She’s egotistical but not really malicious.

 Kay Lee Ray is the NXT UK women’s champ. She doesn’t even go to this school. She is Scottish, skinny and a third thing. She wants to be on the baddies team for reasons.

 Match four – Men’s WarGames: The Undisputed Era (Adam Cole, Bobby Fish, Kyle O'Reilly and Roderick Strong) vs. Tommaso Ciampa, Keith Lee, Dominik Dijakovic, and TBA

 Individually, the second team (the goodies) would seem to have the advantage. However, the Undisputed Era (the baddies) have an edge due to the power of scumbag friendship. (Friendship is a bad guy quality in WWE for some reason.)

 The Undisputed Era is a team of 4 different kinds of douchebags. They currently have all the men’s championships in NXT. I’ve heard them described as Millennial nWo. But unlike the original, each member of the Undisputed Era seems to both enjoy wrestling and be good at it.

 Adam Cole is their leader and the heavyweight champion. He’s skinny, has long hair, and says “baby.” He’s the sort of guy who would bring a signed photo of himself to the Christmas party’s pirate exchange.

 Fish and O’Reilly are the tag champs. O’Reilly is basically a white version of Genan Shiranui (2) from Samurai Shodown minus the Freddy Kreuger glove. He likes to strum his belt like an air guitar and is affectionately (?) referred to as Scumbag Kyle. Fish has a hipster mustache. . . and. . . is also a member of Undisputed Era.

 Roderick Strong has the look and personality of a K-mart ripoff version of a 1980s action figure, and is almost as tall. He wrestles like an annoying AI in a WWE video game. He does 100 different versions of a backbreaker and is thus called the “Messiah of the Backbreaker” which is a nickname that I think is part of the war on Christmas.

  Leading the good guy team is Tommaso Ciampa, evil made flesh. But, he’s recently back from an injury and is thus a good guy. He’s bald, has a beard, and loves violence more than god, family or country. I believe if you shot him with a cannon, he would still kick out at 2.

 Keith Lee used to play defensive end for Texas A&M. Picture a guy who used to play defensive end for Texas A&M, now make no changes to that image. He’s 6’2” over 300lbs, can do just about anything in a wrestling ring, and by all rights should be able to toss any member of the Undisputed Era into the upper balcony any time he wants.

  Dominik Dijakovic is Keith Lee’s blood rival. He’s 6’7” 270lbs and is basically Sagat (3) from Street Fighter if Sagat from Street Fighter was from Worcester, Massachusetts.  

 The fourth member of the team is as yet unannounced.

 ***

There you have it! No titles are on the line, every match is people who dislike each other are going to settle their differences through violence, even if they have to team up with people they hate.

 Also, there are two other rosters worth of wrestlers in town ready to fuck shit up for no reason other than brand supremacy.

 What could go wrong?!

 (notes:

1.  https://arthur.fandom.com/wiki/Binky_Barnes

2. https://snk.fandom.com/wiki/Genan_Shiranui

3. https://streetfighter.fandom.com/wiki/Sagat

[wwereaderinserts]

Hi, if you're still taking HC requests I'd love to see some original Demon Kane / you power-couple headcanons. Love what you're doing with them!

Thank you so much!

Being a power couple with Demon!Kane

A force to be reckoned with

In every sense of the phrase

You know damn well he’ll always be there to protect you

Not that you particularly need protecting, of course

You and Kane both know you can handle yourself

But there’s absolutely no chance he’ll let anybody bring any harm to you

And if they do?

He doesn’t even hesitate to give them hell

He sees red, and you seem to be the only one who can calm him down

You’re both fairly intimidating to everybody else on the roster

They tend to steer clear of you both if they aren’t already allied with either of you

Purely out of fear of potentially saying the wrong thing

The last thing anybody would want to do is piss you off

You both dominate your respective divisions

And you’re always there to cheer each other on throughout your matches

People are sure to question your relationship with him at first

But you don’t care what they think

Neither of you do

Even though you’re not overly affectionate on-screen, you love each other

Of that, you’re absolutely certain

[easilydistractedbyfanfic]

The 100 Ask Game

Thanks for tagging me, @mamabearsdontthink - this looks like FUN!

1. What Station on the Ark would you be from?

I have a pretty green thumb with houseplants and outside flowers and some fruits/veggies. I could realistically be in Farm Station, I think, though Factory might be a fit too. 

2. What would you get arrested for on the Ark?

Political protest, for sure. Possibly with regard to the hierarchical aspects of their society and/or the representation of the people in the lowest stations. 

3. Would you take off your wristband when you landed on the ground?

No, not at all if I was aware that people on the Ark needed to know we were alive in order for them to also be saved.  

4. What would the necklace Finn would make for you look like? (Clarke: deer/Raven: a raven duh..)

Probably a rabbit or an owl, based on what I like and have jewelry about

5. If you could resurrect any MINOR character who would it be?

Jacapo Sinclair, no question

6. Create a squad of 5 characters to go on missions with. Who are they?

Raven, Diyoza, Abby, Luna & Murphy - yeah that’s gonna be wild and I might die but it sure would be fun beforehand

7. What Grounder Clan would you belong to you?

I’m from the area of the Boat People and could see myself as a member of Floukru although I might miss land and gardening

8. What would your name be in Trigedasleng? (example: Octavia=Okteivia…just make it up!)

Jenn = let’s go with Jynn

9. Thoughts on Finn? Some people hate him, and others love him, so I’m curious

Disliked him fully upon first viewing but after rewatch I think he had some merit. He was not loyal to Raven but I don’t think he did it on purpose

10. Be honest. How willing would you have been to take the chip without knowing all the horrible things it does?

Nope, I would be a holdout. I don’t give in to peer pressure, I’m a skeptic and I’ve lived a long time without ever smoking a cigarette or doing drugs, plus I like organics and refuse to invite Alexa or Siri into my home. Yeah, don’t trust The Man, man! LOL

11. What character do you relate to most?

Oh, Raven, easily. We are not the same, but I get the way she made herself strong by focusing on what she was good at and burying the hurt, and her constant desire to keep the painful emotions bottled up. She’s outwardly confident but inwardly worried, and she tells herself all the time “I’ve got this” even when she’s freaked out. 

12. What character do you like the least?

Dr. Tsing, that horrible horrible horrible so-called “doctor”

13. Describe your delinquent outfit. (Would you wear something like Murphy’s jacket with the spikey red shoulder patch or have a trademark like Jasper’s goggles? Be creative, yet practical)

I don’t like to be dirty and I hate being cold, so I’m in dark colors and probably bundled up compared to others. My favorite color is blue though, and if I am from Floukru, maybe I have a dark blue jacket or a shirt with blue patches on it. I would also always carry an extra pair of socks in case my feet got cold. 

14. Favorite type of mutant animal?

There’s not many to choose from

15. What would your job be on the Ark?

I could see myself working a bit undercover like Nigel, getting covert things for people or making deals, although my regular job might be for Farm Station

16. Would you have willingly pumped Ontari’s heart if Abby asked?

yeah, I could do that

17. If Lexa wasn’t Heda, but she was still alive then who would have made the best commander?

I’d pick Indra. She was kind of blood thirsty in the beginning and turned away Lincoln from Trikru, but she proved open to other suggestions, she learned to trust Kane and she even avoided killing Pike although she wanted revenge because she realized they needed him to complete the mission they were on. So later Indra, not early Indra. Otherwise probably Luna. 

18. How would you act if you ate the hallucinogenic nuts like Jasper and Monty?

Hmmmm.... I get overly affectionate when drunk, so if that’s any indication, I should probably stay away from those nuts

19. How would you have dealt with Charlotte’s crime? A more John Murphy approach or Bellamy Blake approach?

Consequences with compassion - hopefully the Bellamy Blake version

20. Who should have been the Chancellor, if anyone?

Jacapo Sinclair, mostly because he wouldn’t have wanted the job. The best leaders are the ones who are least likely to want power

21. Would you have been on Pike’s side like Bellamy or on Kane’s side? Or Clarke in Polis?

Kane’s side

22. Mount Weather had a lot of modern commodities. (example: Maya’s Ipod) What is the one thing you would snatch while there?

Ingredients for food like cake and other desserts. Yum!

23. What would your Grounder tattoos look like? Hairstyle? War paint?

I have a rune compass tattoo at the base of my neck. I might have more tattoos if I was a Grounder, but not obvious ones - maybe inner wrist, maybe something on my ankle or behind my ear. They would likely be symbols of things or types of characters that would provide protection or inspiration of a life goal. No war paint, I don’t think, though that could change if the cause were just. For hairstyle - I wear my hair down about 98% of the time, so maybe there would be some small braids but I doubt my hair would ever be fully pulled back. 

24. Favorite quote?

You know, it’s not well known, but Murphy tells Ontari that “It’s better to lie your way out of a problem than kill” and that always sticks with me. Plus anything Sinclair ever says to Raven (oh my heart)

25. If all of the characters were in the Hunger Games, who would have the best shot at winning?

Luna, because I think she could outlive everyone either by fighting until the death OR by stomping off by herself and outlasting everyone out of sheer willpower

26. Least favorite ship? Favorite canon ship? Favorite non canon ship? NOT INCLUDING CL OR BC OR BE

Least: I have never been onboard the mem0ri train

Favorite canon: Murphy & Raven and their whole dynamic

Favorite non-canon: Murven but now there’s sex

27. A song that should be included in the next season? If there had to be another guest star like Shawn Mendes on the show, who would you want to make a cameo?

"What’s Good” by Fenne Lily or “Bill Murray” by Phantogram for songs in the show. For a guest star, I could really get behind Pink being someone who lives on the new planet and is kinda crazy and all about being a strong female leader. She could do something wild or she could do some haunting ballad that would make us all have feelings and I could so see this now

28. What would you do if you were stuck in the bunker with Murphy for all that time?

Is this a trick question? I mean, there was wine in that lighthouse bunker, and I already said what happens when I get drunk. 

29. You’re an extra that gets killed off. How do you die?

I wanna go like Sinclair, barrette dad or David Miller - protecting someone I love. It would probably be Raven, honestly. 

30. A character you’d like to learn more about and get flashbacks of?

Diyoza

31. A character you’d bang?

Damn, this is a revealing quiz. I’d totally bang Diyoza but this question probably needs it’s own list

32. Would you stay in the Bunker? Go up to Space? Or live on your own in Eden?

I’d probably prefer the Eden environment, but ultimately I’d go to space even if it scared me and felt claustrophobic because I would need peer relationships

33. In the Bunker, would you follow Octavia? What would you do to pass the time underground?

yeah, I’d go along but mentally I might be preparing my eventual escape - creating a fantasy world to escape from the reality of it all

probably read and learn some kind of martial arts

34. What crime would you commit in the Bunker that lands you in the fighting pits?

I don’t like to recite pledges or make oaths I don’t intend to keep

35. Up in Space, who would you bond with first? Who would be the most difficult for you to get along with?

I’d get along with Raven right away, and not just because I love her but because we do have some things in common and I could put up with her snark. Tougher would be Em0ri if she was being mean to Murphy like in S5

36. How long do you think you would last on Earth by yourself?

I think I could go awhile if I had berries, leaves and water as choices. If I had to eat bugs though, I’d probably find a way to kill myself quickly. I’d eventually get lonely, which would be a problem, but if I could find books I’d last a hell of a lot longer too. 

37. When the Eligius ship lands what do you do?

Watch for a while, for sure. See if I could find a way to lure them away from my area for good. 

38. Favorite Eligius character? Least favorite?

Diyoza is my favorite for sure

least favorite - McCreary but in a I love to hate him way

39. Would you Spacewalk?

No. I love roller coasters but I wouldn’t bungee jump either

40. Would you prefer to eat Windshield Bugs, Space Algae, or Bunker Meat?

Algae if I had to pick, otherwise my life would totally be in danger because I’d be so repulsed

41. Would you start a war for the last spot of green on earth? What would your solution be to avoid it?

I’m up for diplomacy and would keep trying til all options were gone before I’d head to war. Maybe inter-marriages, or skill trading/trainings

42. Would you rather dig out flesh-eating worms or stick thumb drives into bullet holes?

Thumb drives into bullet holes since at least I wouldn’t get infected by that

43. Are you willing to poison your sister for the Traitor Who You Love? What would you do to stop Octavia?

Yeah, if I thought the biggest chance would be that it knocked her out rather than kill her, and that having her out of the way would mean peace

44. Would you go to sleep in cryo or stay awake like Marper?

Sleep along with my faves

45. Who are you waking up first to explore the new planet?

Not too different from the show, maybe, although I would have sent Indra down to explore with that team since she’s an experienced leader and fighter, but if we wanna go a bit fantasy like for a moment, then I’d wake up Raven & Murphy and “accidentally” lock them in a closet together for as long as it would take. 

Consider yourself tagged if you wanna participate, and I’d love to read your own choices! 

[electricbluebutterflies]

Kabby 6+44 for the things you said prompt

Post-s2-grayspace fluff! PG-ish and also on ao3.

things you said under the stars and in the grass + things you said before you kissed me

To her surprise, they stay civil once they heal up.

The first week of this new dynamic, Abby blames on the amount of pain she's in. Movement is not at all desirable, and she's too damn tired to hide her emotions under the usual layers, and Marcus is… there, for lack of a better word. He's having an existential crisis and apparently thinks taking care of her is an acceptable way of dealing with it, and she's surprised by how little she minds. The softness of him is new and unfamiliar, but she decides she likes it.

And then he stays gentle even once she can keep up, and that is a problem.

She won't take another lover. She can't, she promised herself the moment Jake died that she'd never risk another person like that. Yes, she knows how many factors were in play and how little she actually could've done, but she still has that weight on her shoulders, that unshakeable guilt that makes her so terrified to even think about hypothetically wanting anyone. Let alone someone so distinct and so close.

This new unfolding version of Marcus Kane is not something she could've planned for - if she's honest, something he didn't plan for either. It's just kinda happening, and the changes are all such dramatic improvements, and yet he's still…

Something broke him. She broke him, she knows that much. Is it wrong to think the brokenness is the most beautiful thing she's ever seen?

They have a community to run, and that takes time and energy like nothing else Abby has ever done, but every few days he decides they need a break from administrative tasks. Today, he's decided they're going for a walk and she is not allowed to come up with any reasons to say no, and she goes with it so easily it frightens her. It won't be a full break, exactly - they'll still end up talking logistics, and likely getting more done than they would in their workroom because no one else will be in their way. Just them, in a beautiful place for a couple hours, and it will be lovely.

It's a little later than they should be out, perhaps, but she's unafraid as they slip through the main gate. As long as they're together, she's safe. It's a strange feeling, realizing that someone who was once her worst enemy has become her anchor, but she thinks she loves it. Marcus has a pistol on his hip and a knife in his jacket pocket in case of emergency, but the threat level is low and their direction is safe. Hell, they could be out the whole night and be okay now.

Not that Abby would ever think of such a thing, but they could. If they wanted to. Which she does not. At all. She's pretty sure.

"This is the first quiet I've gotten in a week," she murmurs once they're out into the wild. She's still overwhelmed by the sheer amount of green around her - it snowed a couple days ago but it's melted now, still bitter cold but in a different way than the sky was. Much more to look at, definitely.

"I know. I thought… we both do so much, and… for the next few hours, maybe…"

"Are you suggesting that we actually do nothing for a while? I am impressed."

"You haven't taken a proper break from anything in over a year, Abby. I know that's how you handle things, but…"

"And you're just as bad and have been for longer."

"We can do better here. I want us to do better."

There's something hesitant in the way he says us, like he's still figuring out all he wants that word to cover, and she picks that moment to reach for his hand. Neither of them are affectionate people, but there's comfort in closeness and this slowly-developing shift between them. Perhaps, in a few years…

"And how does going for a walk at sunset factor into this?"

"We've both had injuries recently and I think you said something about movement helping recovery? And we've both done even more than we planned to do today, and I thought… I thought you'd like a change of scenery."

It's a sweet gesture, and since when did sweet become a word that applied to Marcus Kane so easily, and if she were a slightly different woman she'd twirl around and kiss him right now because it would be appropriately reckless. But she is still guarded and probably cursed, and she's scared, and-

"Thank you."

These new feelings need to go the hell away, she decides as they continue to walk slowly in peaceful silence. She should not be feeling so fluttery around him of all people. She should not be wondering what it would feel like to feel his beard against her most sensitive places. But oh, she is human and her options are limited and maybe he does make sense, as someone who has seen her at her worst and yet is currently her favorite person, and-

"Is something wrong?" he asks at exactly the right moment.

"Feels strange to be talking to you and not thinking about putting my hands around your neck. Not wrong, just not used to it."

"Me neither, but I like this much better."

"You've… you've changed, Marcus."

"I finally saw what was right in front of me the whole time and decided to act accordingly."

Oh.

She'd expected as much - there aren't a lot of other possible catalysts for his transformation, especially given the timing - but hearing him actually say it is something else entirely and her heart melts. More than she ever could've hoped for, in this unexpected form, and-

It is all too easy to pull him down and kiss him, because she can and she wants to and she's curious, and she tastes the shock as he shifts around her and wraps her in his arms and oh, yes, good.

"We should… we should be careful about… doing that."

Fifteen years she's wondered what it would take to render him speechless. She really should've kissed him sooner.

"I'm not asking you to go to bed with me. Not yet, anyways. But I wanted to see if-"

He initiates the next kiss. And the one after. And all of the gentleness she's watched develop is brought into their collision, and all of the fire that has burned between them for so long, and it is beautifully enough.

"You're right," she murmurs. "We should be careful. Anyone else finds out we've done that…"

"I told you about the betting pool, right?"

"What betting pool?"

"You, um… it will be safer for everyone if you don't know, Abby. But it exists. About us."

"Can you at least tell me who I want to kill?"

"That's exactly why I can't."

"This new version of you is no fun."

He leans down and kisses her again, deeper this time. "Are you sure?"

"Don't take this somewhere you don't want to go, Marcus."

"I want to go there. But not… not here. I am not lying you down on poisonous plants. Sometime soon, if you want, but not in the great outdoors."

"Alright."

She kisses his cheek, because she's feeling playful, and the look on his face tells her everything she wants to know right now.

At some point in time, she bled pretty enough to wrap him around her fingers, and now… now she gets to figure out what to do with that. Hopefully they'll have time.

"We should go back towards home," she murmurs.

"We're safe a little while longer. I like the quiet."

"You like the fact that I won't be able to explain the state of my face if anyone notices the scratches."

"Well now that you mention it…"

[thesinglesjukebox]

LIL NAS X - OLD TOWN ROAD

[6.73]

We're gonna bluuuurb til we can't no more...

Katie Gill: The problem with "Old Town Road" is that it's more interesting as a thinkpiece than an actual song. The song charting, then being excluded, from the Billboard Country Music charts opens so many questions that can't be answered in one sitting. Is this a further example of the well-documented racism in country music? Or is this just a freak accident hick-hop song that vaulted it's way out of the depths of subgenre hell? Is a twangy voice and references to horses enough to make a song "country"? Does the presence of Billy Ray Cyrus in a remix that dropped on Friday legitimize the song's credentials or just make them worse? Where was all this controversy when "Meant To Be," an honest-to-god pop song, was holding steady on the charts? There are so many questions and so many points of conversation that spring out from this song, that it's a pity "Old Town Road" itself is just okay. Everything about it screams "filler track for the SoundCloud page," from the length to the trap beats to the aggressively mediocre lyrics. The song didn't even chart on it's own merits: it charted because it's used in a TikTok meme! This is like if "We Are Number One" or "No Mercy" made their way to the top of the iTunes charts and people decided to have a conversation about the limits of genre based on those charting. I'm a little annoyed, because the conversation around "Old Town Road" is something that country music should be having... but just not around "Old Town Road." [5]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: There are essays upon essays to be written about "Old Town Road" as a prism for the racial divides that have served as undergirding for the modern American genre system since the 1930s division between "hillbilly" and "race" records. It's the perfect hunk of think-piece fodder: a simple core question -- is it country? -- that can spiral out to all corners of culture until the song itself is obscured. So let's focus on the song, instead. Because beyond all world-historical significance, "Old Town Road" fucking bangs. It's all in the bait and switch of that intro -- banjos and horns plunking away until Lil Nas X's triumphant "YEAAAH" (second this decade only to Fetty Wap) drops and the beat comes in. It's a joke until it's not -- maybe you came in from the Red Dead Redemption 2 video, or from a friend of yours talking about the hilarious country trap song, or from the artist's own Twitter, which is more Meech On Mars than Meek Mill, but no matter the source, you'll find that "Old Town Road" has its way of looping into your brain, all drawls and boasts and banjos. It's meme rap, but much like prior iterations of this joke ("Like a Farmer"), Lil Nas X fully and deeply commits -- he doesn't drop the pretense for a single line, keeping the track short enough to not outlive its welcome while still exploring its weird conceit to its fullest. Yet even in its jokey vibe there's some actual pathos -- no matter how put on, the lonesome cowboy sorrow of Lil Nas X's declaration that he'll "ride till [he] can't no more" feels genuine. "Old Town Road" is everything at once, the implosion of late teens culture into one undeniable moment. [10]

David Moore: So here's a true gem of a novelty song -- a phrase I use with both intention and respect; I grew up in a Dementoid household -- that could launch a thousand thinkpieces about hip-hop, country, class, the object and subject of jokes, whether to call something a joke at all, you name it. But what I keep returning to is the economy of it, its simplicity, how there is so much in so little, the way that someone on the outside can grok things inaccessible to the insiders, maybe by accident or by studious observation and a fresh perspective, the way music can be a multiverse, characters from one world complicating or clarifying or confusing the limits of another in a mutually provocative way. I'm not a backstory guy, which is to say I'm not a research guy, which is to say I'm either intuitive or lazy or both, so I don't have any clue where this came from, but I know magic when I hear it, I know what it sounds like when you discover, or simply stumble into by accident, the path beyond the bounds of territory you presumed exhausted, territory that can always get bigger, always invite whole new parties to the party. It's a real party party; you can get in. [10]

Katherine St Asaph: "Old Town Road" is the "Starships" of 2019: a song that objectively is not great, but will be called great for the understandable reason that liking or disliking it now unavoidably entails choosing the right or wrong side. This tends to lead to hand-waving freakoutery about critics not talking about the music, man, but once The Discourse is out in the world, it becomes a real and critical part of the song's existence; not talking about Billboard punting "Old Town Road" would be like talking about "Not Ready to Make Nice" as an workaday country song. The problem is not quite as simple as "the Billboard charts don't want black artists," an argument with historical precedent but now doomed to fail: clearly, people like Kane Brown and Darius Rucker and Mickey Guyton (who's left off lists like this, somehow) have hits. It's more about respectability politics. Traditionalists hate the idea of memes, social media, and perceived line-cutting, all of which means they'll hate a song born not of the Nashville and former-fraternity-bro scene, but via TikTok and stan Twitter. But what they really, really hate is rap and anything that sounds like a gateway to rap; like if they tolerate this Cardi B will be next. Country radio, for the past decade or two, has been pop radio with all the blatant rap signifiers removed; its songs aren't about cowboys or horses but suburban WASP life. Of course, double standards abound. Talking about lean is out; talking about bingeing beer is fine. "Bull riding and boobies" isn't OK because it's from a guy called Lil Nas X -- I honestly think people would whine less if this exact song was credited to "Montero Hill" -- but "I got a girl, her name's Sheila, she goes batshit on tequila" is OK because it's from a guy called Jake Owen, and "Look What God Gave Her" is OK because it hides its ogling of boobies behind plausibly deniable God talk. Fortunately "Old Town Road" is better than "Starships" -- the NIN sample is inspired, and the hook is evocative and sticky. (It fucks with authenticity politics, too -- Lil Nas X wrote his own song, but the big corporate country artists often don't.) Its main problem is that it's slight: a meme that doesn't overstay past the punchline, a song that never quite gets to song size. [5]

Thomas Inskeep: Sampling Nine Inch Nails' "34 Ghosts IV" to (help) create a western motif is hands-down brilliant, so huge thumbs-up for that. Lyrically, this is pretty empty, a bunch of western clichés strung together -- but then again, the same can be said of plenty of Big & Rich songs. Split the score down the middle, accordingly. [5]

Scott Mildenhall: But surely this is how country music should sound? Lil Nas X has performed alchemy in combining two generic styles into something inspiring, flipping the meaning of "pony and trap" on its head. The mechanical sound of trap is rusted into the mechanical sound of fixing a combine, or at least pretending that is something you might do, and such performance is fun for all the family. Well, unless you're an American farming family tired of stereotypes anyway. [7]

Stephen Eisermann: Non country (trap) beat with subtle country instrumentation? Sounds like much of country radio, only way better! [7]

Nortey Dowuona: A burning, humming bass girds under sticklike banjos as Lil Nas X rides into town to water his horse and head back out onto the open road. [5]

Alex Clifton: I spent the weekend re-enacting this scene from Easy A with this song, so it's safe to say I like it. I especially love the "horse"/"Porsche" line, which is unexpected and amazing. [7]

Alfred Soto: The usual genre conversations threaten to smother analysis. If Lil Nas X can use trap drums, then why can't Sam Hunt use loops? Silly. (Chief Justice Charles Evans Hughes: "The Constitution is what the judges say it is"). The Kanye allusion ("Y'all can't tell me nuthin'") works extra-diagetically. An assemblage of modest, discrete charms held together by a solid performance at its center -- nothing more. I await the Future-Frank Liddell collab. [5]

Edward Okulicz: It's affectionate and actually quite deferential in its treatment of its parent genres. Crossovers like this have been hinted at, and gestured towards in the other direction quite a bit of late (country artists affecting hip-hop, less so the latter), and the two genres have more in common than the caricatures of the sorts of people who are supposed to listen to them do. Of course, I mean those genres as they exist today, and not in the warped imaginations of purists. You can see why kids have latched on, and it's easy to snarl at Big Chart for sticking their oar in. The kids are right; artists control the means of production and radio and chart compilers can accept that they aren't the tastemakers, and attempts to force their tastes down other people's throats will lead to a backlash. This is not a brilliant song but it's a picture of one of many potential musical futures and, at two minutes, the perfect length too. The right response is to smile, and "Old Town Road" makes it easy to smile -- it's an earworm. Sure, it doesn't give me the same immediate feeling of fuck!!! this is the best that I got when I first heard that version of Bubba Sparxxx's "Comin' Round" but country music survived "Honey, I'm Good" and it will survive this. It might well thrive. [6]

Joshua Copperman: I recently found out that I have a moderate Vitamin D deficiency, but looking up the song everyone was talking about and hearing this basically confirmed that I should go outside more often. There are definitely things to talk about: it's the logical conclusion to "I listen to everything except country and rap" jokes when the inverse has taken over the Hot 100, and it's a song that's set to hit number one because everyone is incredulous that it exists at all -- with a Billy Ray Cyrus remix to boot. The conversations about what makes a song "country" are all fascinating, but it's hard to fully enjoy pieces about something that, as an actual song, is so fundamentally empty. The Nine Inch Nails sample is interesting, but like everything else, more intriguing in theory than execution. This will wind up on every site's "best of 2019" lists, and then in ten years people will snark on how a song with "My life is a movie/Bullridin' and boobies" was so critically acclaimed. As a meme/discourse lightning rod, it's an [8], as a how-to guide for late-2010s fame, it's a [10], but there's little appeal in a vacuum. Adding a bonus point, because music has never existed in a vacuum anyway. [5]

Taylor Alatorre: Remember when the internet was still described as a realm of lawless and limitless potential, when open source could be touted as revolutionary praxis and "free flow of information" was a sacred utterance? Now one of the key political questions is whether private companies should be doing more to banish online rulebreakers or whether the federal government should step in to delimit what those rules are. Whichever side ends up winning, it's clear that the wide open spaces of the Frontier Internet are rapidly facing enclosure. Montero Hill learned this the hard way when his @nasmaraj account was suspended by Twitter as part of its crackdown against spam-based virality. While Tweetdeckers are nobody's martyrs, it's a minor tragedy every time an account with that many followers and that much influence gets shunted off to the broken-link stacks of the Wayback Machine. Rules must be laid down, but their enforcement always entails loss -- the bittersweet triumph of civilization over nature that forms the backbone of every classic Western. Maybe Hill/nasmaraj/Lil Nas X had this loss in mind when writing the jauntily defiant lyrics of "Old Town Road." Maybe he was just riding the microtrends of the moment like he was before. Still, this particular microtrend -- the reappropriation of cowboy imagery by non-white Americans -- feels too weighty to be reduced to mere aesthetics. Turner's Frontier Thesis may have been racially blinkered to the extreme, but the myths and yearnings it spawned can never die; they just get democratized. So it makes sense that young Americans, even those who don't know who John Wayne is, would subconsciously reach out for the rural, the rustic, the rugged and free, just as we feel the global frontiers closing all around us. Our foreign policy elites hold endless panel talks about "maintaining power projection" and "winning the AI race," but most normal people don't care about that stuff. We're all secretly waiting for China to take over like in our cyberpunk stories, so we can drop all the pressures of being the Indispensable Nation and just feast off our legacy like post-imperial Britain. And what is that legacy? It's rock, it's country, it's hip hop, it's "Wrangler on my booty," it's all the vulgar mongrelisms that force our post-ironic white nationalists to adopt Old Europe as their lodestar. In short, it's "Old Town Road." We're gonna ride this horse 'til we can't no more, we're gonna reify these myths 'til we can't no more, because when the empire is gone, the myths are all we have. (Oh, and the Billy Ray remix is a [10]. Obviously.) [9]

Jonathan Bradley: People suppose that genre exists to delineate a set of sounds, and while it does do that, it depends even more on its ability to build, define, and speak for communities. The question of whether "Old Town Road" is a country song or not is in some ways easily resolved: country music showed no interest in Lil Nas X -- or at least not until Billy Ray Cyrus noticed an opportune moment to complicate expectations and grab headlines -- and so Lil Nas X's song was not country. Even taking into account its sound and subject matter, his hit is best understood as a burlesque on country music, one that parodies and exaggerates the genre's motifs and themes for heightened effect. The kids on TikTok, who turned the long-gone lonesome blues of the song's tumbleweed hook into viral content, understand this intuitively: they use the incongruity that clarifies at the beat drop as an opportunity to engage in caricature and costume. And while Lil Nas X, a huckster and a trendspotter before he was a pop star, has been happy to embrace the yee-haw mantle that has been bestowed upon him, his song is a familiar rap exercise in play and extended metaphor. The Shop Boyz did much the same thing with "Party Like a Rock Star" and it would be obtuse to suppose that was a rock song. And yet, as the country historian Bill C. Malone has written, country since its inception has attracted fans "because of its presumed Southern traits, whether romantically or negatively expressed"; there has always been a bit of schtick to this sound. I wondered when we reviewed Trixie Mattel whether country is, on some level, intrinsically camp, and it's tough to declare definitively that Lil Nas X's bold hick strokes are that much more stylized than Jake Owen's performance of small town ordinariness. And just as a country music based on cohesive community rather than sound has found itself broad enough to encompass northern hair metal, Auto-Tuned club stomps, and Ludacris, the gate-keeping involved in keeping Lil Nas X out begins to look suspicious. After all, the first song to debut on Billboard's Most Played Juke Box Folk Records chart, the predecessor to today's Hot Country Songs, was "Pistol Packin' Mama," a hillbilly goof by the decidedly uncountry combination of Bing Crosby and the Andrews Sisters. As Malone has written, "While the commercial fraternity thought mainly of profits, the recording men, radio executives, publicists, promoters, ad men, sponsors, and booking agents who dealt with folk music also readily manipulated public perceptions in order to sell their products." One of the ways they did that was to tap into already mythological figures of American individualism like the cowboy, who is, after all, a creature of the west and not the South. "The respective visions of cowboy and western life drew far more from popular culture and myth ... than they did from reality," Malone writes of the early country singers who embraced cowboy personae; in some ways Lil Nas X's purloining of meme interest in that same culture places him within a rich country heritage. After all, when in popular entertainment has shameless self-promotion not been part of the aspirant's trade? It does matter how cultural communities react to the music made in their name, but when certain people are adjudicated not fit for club membership, it is worth asking why. Country's culture, I said recently, is "one that's implicitly but not definitely Southern, implicitly but not definitely rural, and implicitly but not definitely white," and it's easy to see how Lil Nas X doesn't fit into that. Country music's racism isn't unique to the genre -- the historical hegemonies of punk and indie rock are at least as determinedly white -- but it is particularly visible. Country is racist like the South is racist like America is racist. Lil Nas X disrupts that settlement, helping us imagine a country music that genuinely encompasses the music of the American South -- a genre that has space for "This is How We Roll" and Miranda Lambert, Lil Boosie and Young Thug, "Formation" and Juvenile, and perhaps even Norteño and banda sounds. That would be, however, not only a far different country music to what we know today, but the music of a far different America. [7]

Iris Xie: Yeet haw! Aside from the great pleasure I've had in showing this to my friends, (Me, two weeks ago: "Have you heard this country trap song???" My friends, this week: "Iris, that song you're talking about now has Billy Ray Cyrus on it??") and either slinging back and forth memey references, engaging in discussions on the state of white supremacy in the music industry while also debating about the song's merit, or hearing my friends start singing "can't nobody tell me nothing..." very quietly at any moment and I can't help but join in -- it's all been very fun. Aside from making plans to play "Old Town Road" on my next country road drive to Costco, something that's occurred to me is that this is a song boosted by the status and calamity of its metanarrative. We could always use more discussions of the double standards that Black and POC artists face in the industry when it comes to genres and participating in it, and I'm honestly glad Lil Nas X just made something that was fun and made sense to him, even if "Old Town Road" doesn't stray too much from the conventions of both trap and country, resulting in a well-balanced mashup that sounds more safe than surprising to me, but is serene in its confidence nevertheless. On the flipside of that genre-mashing, Miley wishes and is probably very jealous of her father now for hopping onto this train, lest we forget about all of her cultural appropriation attempts. But for the song itself, those long, relaxed drawls and the imagery of riding a horse to the trap beat -- why not? We live in weird times now, Black people's contributions to country music were erased, and it's kind of a relaxing song. Also, I'm a fan of the "Can't nobody tell me nothing" lyric, which has become an unintentionally defiant line in the face of all the backlash, resulting in a message to rally around. Now excuse me, as I text my friends that "I'm gonna take my horse down to the old town road." [8]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[queercapwriting]

Sanvers Slow Burn

Coming Back to You (Chapter 13)

(full work here)

She won't look at those texts until she clears up this crime scene. 

She won't, because she can't, because if she does... 

She looks. 

She shouldn't, because there's blood on the walls that needs her attention. But the message previews show up on her phone, and Alex's texts look like they're getting longer and more rambly and... 

Maggie gulps and gives the texts a quick read. Just to make sure Alex and Kim are okay, she tells herself. Just to make sure they're alright. 

But... shit. When did Alex become Alex and Kim, and when did they become part of Maggie's protectiveness? Shit. 

Her heart rate rises -- as does the rush of blood to her face -- as she reads Alex's messages. She chuckles as Alex points out her own rambling, and heat pools deep in her belly when Alex bravely reminds Maggie that she used to find Alex's rambling cute. Shit. She still does. 

Shit fuck damn. 

This is bad. 

Then why is she smiling? 

"Something amusing, Captain?" the chief of police wants to know, and she immediately pockets her phone and stiffens. 

"No sir, sorry, just... family stuff." 

Now where had that come from? 

"Sorry sir. I'm here." 

She immediately settles onto her haunches for a closer look at the blood spatter, clenching her teeth to remind herself why she does her job. 

"No need to be sorry, Sawyer. It's been a long time since I've seen you smile. And I've certainly never seen you smile within twenty-four hours of mentioning family." 

Maggie glances up to meet his eyes, a knot forming in her stomach. She shouldn't have looked at her phone. She shouldn't have... 

"Must be a special woman, huh?" he asks, squatting next to her companionably. Her shoulders tense before she realizes that he's smiling softly at her. "No need to talk, Sawyer. I remember your cadet days, so I've known you long enough to know that talking isn't your thing. I'm just happy to see you smile." "

Thank you, sir," she murmurs, wondering how she could possibly feel so small -- pleasantly so -- with her captain's badge on. 

They finish their sweep of the crime scene in almost affectionate silence, drawing the same conclusions at the same moments, and agreeing without words to call Kate Kane in to help on this one. 

She'd nearly memorized, on first read, most of Alex's words. She could hear them in Alex's voice. She wondered -- and she was surprised to find that the thought made her smile -- if Kim had helped her mother with the texts. 

Her mother. Alex was a mother. It was something that she was both still wrapping her head around and that, somehow simultaneously, made complete sense. Not with her job, necessarily, but with her constant need to protect. 

"What the hell do I say to that?" she murmurs to herself as she leans next to her motorcycle. 

"You could always try good old-fashioned honesty. 'I'd love nothing more than to come back to National City and make you see stars till the sun comes up, then make breakfast for you and your adorable child.'" 

"Jesus, Kate," Maggie jumps, torn between rolling her eyes at Batwoman or reaching to swat at her upside-down form. "Do you always have to creep up on people?" 

"Gotta live up to my name." 

"Bats don't creep." 

"You're changing the subject." 

Maggie sighs, letting her eyes flutter closed and shaking her head as she thinks. "This is a bad idea, Kate. She wants to get to know each other again? We got to know each other the first time, and it ended in..." 

She's too proud to say earth-shattering heartbreak, but she doesn't have to. Kate was there when Maggie first moved back to Gotham, and it had been utterly clear. 

"Maybe running into each other was your second chance," Kate tilts her head in the way she'd picked up from her friend. 

Maggie bites her lip and sighs. 

"Fine. Here we go, then."

[alarickane]

Life is not a love song, we can try

The holidays were supposed to be a time for family and yet Alaric had been avoiding his family even before the holiday season fully settled in, happy parents holding hands and window shopping for their children while Alaric dodged all inquiries and invitations that he could from his own parents.

They'd wanted to know who he was going to the Yule Ball with and he'd prevaricated, insisting he wasn't sure if he'd be going and questioning if a date would be appropriate considering Gisela's death. Basically, he'd lied through his teeth while smiling at his mother because he knew that if he told the woman that he had a date with a muggleborn girl, a girl he was in a relationship with, that it wouldn't go over well. He remembered the way they reacted to Dirk, after all, and he didn't want the list of politely suggested pureblood women to turn into something else like a short list of future brides.

When Christmas grew closer, there were owls. A lot of them. Eloquent missives from his mother asking about his plans and if he'd be joining them, how work was going, and wanting to know how much time he'd have away. Really, his mum nearly wrote his excuse for him that time, making it easy for Alaric to claim that work was busy, there was a large order that had been destroyed and needed to be dealt with, that he wouldn't be able to make it home and sent both his parents his best like it would really have been difficult to step through the floo for an evening to see them.

That was just another thing that was politely ignored.

Of course, Alaric's parents weren't fools and there was only so long he could avoid them... which was better than Ari, at least, because Alaric had never managed to avoid them. He usually didn't want to, but it seemed that the older they became, the fewer opinions they held that remained the same.

You need to come home

it was his father's bold script and short, no nonsense manner, the one that said there were certain things that Avery men did and certain things they did not. Alaric knew that tone and knew he was going home.

December 28th, 2pm.

The letter arrived the day after Christmas and that didn't seem like enough time to prepare for facing his parents, but it was enough time for him to begin to panic about what they could know. It could be something innocent, it could have been about Ari's time being questioned by the Ministry, it could be that something had happened to his aunt in Azkaban, it didn't necessarily have anything to do with the fact he kissed a girl in Hogsmeade after Halloween, that he let her stay with him after her roommate disappeared and that she was his date to the Yule ball.

Maybe it didn't have anything with the fact he loved her.

Getting ready to go back to his childhood home and see his parents felt akin to slipping on an old skin, dressing himself in layers of propriety and perhaps shame that he'd slowly been discarding since... well, since the first time he'd met Pandora, hadn't it been?

Although he couldn't give Pandora all the credit, talking to Dirk had helped him as well and that was another thing his parents likely wouldn't take well to. They'd warned him about Dirk's influence last time and told him what they thought about his 'proclivities', after all, hadn't they?

"Alaric."

It was his mother that greeted him first after one of the house elves showed him into the study, one of the poor thing's ears looking blackened, charred as if by the fire in the grate and Alaric wondered almost absently what the creature had done to provoke enough ire for that. Maybe the silver hadn't been polished properly.

They approached each other just enough that they could take hold of each other's elbows, exchanging air kisses as the smell of her perfume made him think of dying flowers left over from a funeral decaying upon a gravestone. Her dress was dark, a burgundy reminiscent of wine and she was clearly in good health, so he hadn't been called because anything was wrong with her, and the fact neither of his parents were in black led him to believe his aunt hadn't been given the kiss, either. Not that she would have been dead, just soulless, which really had already been a subject for debate.

"Hello, mum," He said in response before turning to his father. Nothing but a handshake there, but that's how things had been for years. Since leaving for Hogwarts, probably, so it didn't really matter and it wasn't unexpected, but it did help remind him of how casually affectionate he'd become with people lately. He'd hugged Delilah that last time he'd seen her and could probably get away with hugging Gil, too.

Actually, it was Gil, so cheek kisses might be acceptable, too.

"What was so urgent?" He said it with a mild tone of concern and a look of puzzlement, but if he was concerned about anything, it wasn't for how his parents were doing. He wanted to think they'd summoned him there because of Ari, but Alaric couldn't really bring himself to believe that. The idea of Ari needing someone else to help look out for them seemed too far fetched and if they needed a lawyer or an alibi, his parents wouldn't be going to him.

"Son, sit down." His father said as he sat down and steepled his fingers, and oh, that wasn't good. That serious 'you're in trouble' stuff and Alaric's jaw tensed as he bit back the instinctual 'yes, sir' and sat down.

"We know you've lied to us." The man started, his tone dripping in disapproval.

Well, bless his father for never beating around the bush.

"You've been seen repeatedly with a blonde woman that we've been told works for the Quibbler." The man's lip curled as if the word itself was distasteful and Alaric was aware of the reputation the Quibbler had, but that didn't mean Pandora wasn't good at what she did. "And who is muggleborn."

And there it was, the real issue they had. It wasn't about her job or her name or where she was from, but her blood. It always seemed to come back down to blood in families like his and as Alaric remembered the worry that had choked him when he first told Pandora about his family, he felt a sort of distant anger prickle at his skin. "I'm sure I've been around several women that are blonde. As for muggleborn, it's not a habit of mine to check their blood status." He responded as neutrally as he could, mentally recalling every blonde that he'd spoken to recently before adding on as an afterthought, "I don't check their occupation, either."

How the hell did they know Pandora was a muggleborn, anyway? Some blasted Ministry contact, most likely. But not Ari. He hoped not Ari.

"Lies, Alaric. You took this woman to the ball."

"Mother wanted me to attend," Alaric countered, stubbornly defiant in a way his parents likely thought he'd grown out of it. It was almost nice in a way to prove them wrong, even as his stomach churned anxiously, their disappointment running over him like an oil slick.

"You're not going to use her name?" He asked, letting out a disbelieving huff before shaking his head, hair falling in his eyes. "You seem to know everything else about this woman, don't you know that?"

His father's lips thinned, anger flashing in his eyes, but it was his mother that spoke next. "And what are your intentions towards Miss Kane?"

Oddly enough, it was his mother's ire that he feared more than his father's, her cold precision and cool manners more intimidating and Alaric swallowed back the first thought to come into his head. To court her. It was the truth, he wanted to make sure that Pandora felt special and important and not like entertainment on the side that didn't measure up to other options his family would approve of. To love her. Well, he'd found himself doing that without much thought on his part, hadn't he? Besides, it wasn't like love was something that mattered to his parents. He'd loved Dirk and they rewarded him for that by arranging his marriage to Gisela.

Lowering his head, Alaric noticed a scuff mark on one of his boots and knew what his parents wanted to hear. Nothing, he didn't have any intentions towards Pandora, just like they didn't have any regard or respect for her at all. They accused him of lying to them before, but that felt like the ultimate lie and Alaric couldn't bring himself to say it, didn't want to. He didn't want to disrespect Pandora or his feelings for her lie that and besides, he's promised her better.

The fall out from Dirk had taught him better.

"I'm... not really sure," Alaric finally said slowly, lifting his eyes and wondering where Ari was, why they weren't present. It was probably a good thing they weren't, but he thought of them anyway, of the way they'd always fearlessly announced their decisions and who they were. Their parents may not have always understood or initially approved of Ari, but it always seemed like they were proud of them in the end. They certainly weren't going to approve of what Alaric was doing and they weren't going to be proud, but that was fine. They weren't the ones that Alaric wanted to be proud of him anymore.

Instead, Pandora was, and Dirk, too. And maybe even Gil, who'd grinned at him so brilliantly at the ball while showing off his engagement ring and mentioning Pandora. He couldn't let them down.

"But I know this much. I know she matters to me and that I don't care where she works or what her blood status is."

His mother's laugh was harsh as she leaned back in her chair, settling herself in while Alaric's father stood up, circling around to grab a glass. Scotch, of course. The only thing a real Avery would drink, and Alaric only watched his father long enough to determine his path before returning his gaze to his mother, ignoring the sound of glass on wood.

"Foolish boy," His mother chided. "You said the same thing about that Cresswell man, didn't you?"

Mentioning Dirk felt like a low blow, but it was true and Alaric knew that was something he had to live with, prompting him to lift his chin up and push his shoulders back, readying himself to have painful, shameful memories pulled back up. "Yes, I did." He said.

And I shouldn't have failed him, he thought.

"Good," His mother said, throwing Alaric. He hadn't expected her to be pleased, of all things. "Then we'll handle this situation the same as last time. You'll end this ridiculous dalliance and we'll find you a proper match, but we might need to do something to discredit this girl first. We'll find someone better this time - It can even be another blonde, if that's to your tastes, I think the Greengrass family has a child around your age..."

It was happening again, like someone had set a record on to play and it was finally starting to repeat. It felt like the bottom of Alaric's stomach had dropped out, his skin cold despite the fire in the room and Alaric's chest felt tight like there was a metal band restricting his breathing. Once again his mother was detailing his life while his father sipped and scotch and nodded, like she was handling some minor inconvenience to him that he didn't really care about and was only waiting to sign off on, like party expenses or house elf replacement or something like that. This was his life, they shouldn't do that.

"No." It came out quietly and not entirely evenly, something that Alaric soon realized and he cleared his throat before repeating. "No. I'm not going to do that."

"No?" His mother repeated, the word admittedly not one he said to either parent much and the sound of it had caused her to instantly shut up. "And just what do you think you're going to do instead?"

Standing up, Alaric glanced over at the scotch with a sense of longing before sighing. "I don't know, but you're not going to try marrying me off again. It made me miserable and besides, you're already getting a perfect marriage out of Ari. Leave me out of it."

His mother stood up as well, the distance closing between them as she stalked forward on tiny spike heels and glared, pink dots on her cheeks. "Excuse me?" She said, dangerously quiet and still completely polite, his father watching them with interest in the background. "Do you really want to disappoint us again, Alaric? Do you want to bring shame to our name? I won't let you do it, you're not bringing our family down for some illicit affair with a muggleborn. You'll either find a proper girl to marry or you will no longer be part of this family."

The shaking feeling was back, but he didn’t know if it was from anger or fear as he thought about the future his parents wanted before thinking with unwavering certainty, If I'm marrying anyone, it's Panda. "Fine." He said. "Then do it. Disown me. Burn me from the family tree because I don't want to be your ideal son anymore."

He saw it coming, but Alaric did nothing to stop it as his mother's hand flew through the air and slapped him across the face, the stinging sensation swift and sharp. It wasn't the first time she'd done it, there was a reason Alaric didn't like people reaching for his face, but it would likely be the last time.

"You've never been an ideal son." His mother hissed, and it was only at that point that Alaric realized his father stood up.

"And now I'm not a son at all," Alaric reassured her, turning away and going for the fireplace instead of the door that would take him out of the front. The chair on the mantle had held floo powder for as long as he could remember and it still did as he lifted off the lid and took some in his fingers. "Make sure to tell Ari they're an only child now, won't you?"

Not waiting for their response, Alaric tossed the floo powder into the fire and stepped in, yelling "Diagon Alley."

If he was lucky, his parents would thinking he was bluffing or they actually would get in touch with Ari in an attempt to make him change his mind. It didn't really matter what they did to Alaric as long as it bought him a little bit of time. He knew they would follow through on their threat eventually and disown him, but before they did, he planned on making it to Gringotts and getting as much money out of the family accounts as he could.

And after that, he was going to buy a damned engagement ring.