#WAS IT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE SMUT
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mad about you
pairing: Jack Abbot x lawyer!reader summary: it was supposed to be a one-night stand but Jack can’t stop thinking about you. what he expects the least is for you to arrive at his ER — and not as a patient. (or, alternatively: Jack meets the right person at the right time. and he lets love in)
warnings: 🔞 descriptions of injuries / smut (some teasing, fingering, p in v), Jack being touch-starved and a little rusty (or so he thinks ;). an unexpected amount of domestic fluff, mentions of Jack losing his wife and being shy about his prosthesis / words: 17K / author’s note: I love me a bossy reader but most importantly, I wanted to write someone who can appreciate Jack for the hot man that he is (yes, I got carried away with smut and softness... OH WELL) ♡ {read on AO3}
There is a feeling that’s been growing roots in Jack — it’s agitation that’s akin to premonition. His recent shifts have been too quiet, uneventful, downright boring. With hands trained to save lives, Jack has to spend his nights treating mild burns and accidental cuts, a few drunkards with bruises and concussions, appendicitis being the most exciting diagnosis he made this week. Any sane doctor would be glad to get a break, but Jack finds it annoying.
Because he needs work to keep his head busy, to have something else occupy his thoughts. He wants his hands sweating in gloves, covered in blood — so he’d have an excuse to wash them clean, so he’d get a chance to scrub off the feeling of your body under his fingers—
Jack shakes his head, a movement barely visible, quick like a flinch. He tries shaking off the memories of you — and he keeps failing. Because it feels like they are tucked away in every corner of his flat, and even when exhaustion manages to drag him into sleep, you are the only thing he dreams of. He always wakes up hard. His bedcovers all wet, breath heavy, mind clouded, heart pounding. And what he brims with is not lust but yearning, so strong that he’d go to the other side of town on foot if he could get another chance to see you.
But he’s got no address he can come to, and no phone number he can dial just to hear your voice.
So Jack saddles himself with work — however temporary this fix is, he’s got no other in the meantime. He picks up extra hours, covers extra patients. It isn’t nearly enough. And he is mildly annoyed at this predicament he’s stuck in, at the repeating cycle of the same bland days — nothing to challenge him or bring a speckle of relief. Or keep his mind from wandering back to that moment with you — it’s not the filthiest he can remember but the one he wishes to relive the most:
the hair around your face is damp, and you’re a little breathless — he feels your chest heaving, still pressed to his, arms wrapped around his neck, a tight embrace neither of you wants to break. The bedroom’s dark but he forgot to draw the curtains, and the gloaming light traces your curves and sparkles on your skin that’s glistening with sweat, still heated in every place he touched it. And Jack’s completely spent but something’s kindling in his ribcage — a fire breathed into the embers, the warmth he thought he’d never feel again — it’s growing every time he looks at you — and every time you glance right back at him, and smile at him, and kiss him, and—
“Will you stop fidgeting?” Dana snaps at him mid-yawn. “It’s 7 am, and just looking at you gives me a headache.”
“Then look somewhere else,” Jack flings back. He instantly feels guilty and puts the tablet down. He doesn’t know where to put his hands, fingers unwittingly tapping on the table.
“Oh, someone’s snappy,” but she doesn’t take offence — instead she turns her chair to him, eyes slightly narrowed. “You’ve been walking around all tense and brooding these past few weeks, don’t think I haven’t noticed. Wanna talk about it?”
“It’s nothing,” Jack mumbles. He almost grimaces at his own lie, at how far from reality it is. So he grudgingly sprinkles some truth in: “I guess I’m just bored. Haven’t got much to do. It’s been too qui—”
Dana springs out of her chair and covers his mouth with her palm. “Nope. My shift just started and you already want to jinx it? How about you save that enthusiasm until the night rolls in, and then you can have planes falling from the skies for all I care.”
“I see you finally took matters into your own hands,” Robby strides in with his backpack and takes off the sunglasses, his brown eyes on Dana. “Was he trying to pass on his existential crisis?”
“Can we muzzle him?”
“And put him on a leash? I thought about it. But he will probably escape, and we’ll have an angry dog on the loose and barking,” he grins, gaze darting to Abbot, and Dana laughs.
“You think you’re so fucking funny,” Jack mumbles.
His agitation ebbs a little — enough for him to take a breath as he stretches his back. But your touches must be etched into his muscles because he’s momentarily reminded of your fingertips ghosting his shoulder blades, of your lips trailing for the pulse point on his neck — and what was once a bliss is now a torment he is powerless against. Abbot exhales with exasperation.
The phone rings. Dana loses her smile and gives Jack a glare. “This better not be a mass casualty event,” she whispers before picking it up. But her concerns aren’t brought into existence — her face is only half-focused, mostly apathetic as she informs:
“A shooting at the county court. One victim, GSW to the chest and —” her brows knit together at whatever details she’s receiving. “So it’s two?... Well, it ain’t nuclear physics, just count them. I’d like to know how many people we’re getting... Alrighty, we’ll do the counting ourselves,” she hangs up and clicks her tongue.
McKay runs by to say hi before resuming the heated conversation she is having on the phone. Langdon comes in unhurriedly, hands in his pockets, his eyes drawn to the board. Santos is next, Whitaker trailing after her — he’s always half-asleep, she’s never not excited to get to work.
“Any interesting cases this morning?”
“Waiting for a GSW. Apparently, the main witness on some case — shot in the chest and leg, it’s not looking good. Said they couldn’t use a D-fib on him because he’s coming with a company.”
Robby sends Dana an inquiring glance. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“Fuck if I know. I haven’t even gotten my first cup of coffee yet,” she looks at Jack — pensive, stiff, barely listening to her — and snaps her fingers in his face. “Hey, midnight ranger, isn’t it time for you to clock out? We’ve got a whole team, we’ll manage. Go home.”
“I plan on doing that once I finish the paperwork,” he replies flatly, tapping on the screen.
“If that’s what you are into, you can do mine too. Wanna also file my taxes while you’re at it?”
“I’ll gladly tell the IRS to lock you up for tax fraud to get you off my back,” Abbot deadpans, earning a dry laugh from her.
“Gunshot is boring,” Langdon muses.
Dana’s laugh turns into a groan. “Not this again. Why can’t you guys enjoy the peace and quiet?”
“I mean, if he doesn’t die, he’ll go straight to the OR, not much for us to do. I was hoping for something more—” he suddenly stops talking. There is a sound of wheels gliding across the floor, and a pause sweeps over the hall — the conversations die down, the movements halted — and then Jack hears Frank muttering: “What the hell?”
So Abbot absentmindedly follows his gaze. And just like everyone around him, he is left speechless.
The gunshot victim is a man: mid-sixty, stubby-looking, pale-faced and breathing only by some miracle. But he isn’t wheeled in alone — there is a woman sitting right on top of him, her stark white blouse doused with blood, one of her hands pressed to his chest, three of her fingers shoved into his wound. The crimson droplets glisten in her hair, the same color smeared over her hands up to the wrists, but she’s not scared or appalled. There’s not a single crack in her composure, no quiver in her body or her face —
Jack recognizes you in barely a heartbeat.
And he is frozen not out of surprise. He’s marveling at you like you’re under a spotlight and he’s in a daze, and there is no one else left in the hall. Because you look the exact same you did all these days back, the first time that he saw you. The one time he’ll never forget.
Jack met you over three weeks ago (24 days to be exact, not that he’s been counting). It was supposed to be a one-night stand—
No, actually, scratch that.
It was an evening Abbot didn’t plan on spending with anyone but a glass of whiskey. It was the only remedy that he could think of after the shift he had.
A couple was brought in at 4 am: in their early thirties, newlywed — their car swerved off the road, rolled over four times before hitting a tree. The guy died at the scene, his wife crashed twice on the way to the ER. She was three months pregnant. Jack spent oven an hour coding her; she spent twice as much time in the OR. Two blood transfusions, one kidney out, three broken ribs, dozen of stitches on her stomach and her head. He watched her being transferred to the ICU, then he made calls to notify both families: there were heartbreaking cries, prayers he feared would be left unanswered. Jack came up to the roof to catch his breath — the air outside was moist and stifling, the sky draped with the clouds the sun couldn’t plough through. It was his day off but he didn’t leave — instead Jack walked the stairs and halls until his legs ached, until he could do nothing else but pass out in the call room.
He wakes up in the evening, hardly rested — the female patient still hasn’t woken up. And there is a chance she never will. But if she does, he knows that the reality will hurt her worse than broken ribs and bruises.
When he walks out of the ER, the rain is pouring and his head is pounding, and he thinks if he just goes home, the silence would feel too suffocating to let him fall asleep. He’s too distraught to change out of scrubs, he cares not about the cold droplets hitting his face like needles. He wipes them off and runs into the closest bar — he’s met with semi-darkness and cool air, no blaring music and no flashing neon signs. The quiet is comforting, veiled with the faint sounds of jazz, the place smelling of wood and orange peel and liquor. It’s too early for the crowds to swarm it, but Jack pays no attention to the few people that came in. He strides straight to the counter and orders whiskey — double with no ice, then picks a small table in the farthest corner. He’s a few steps away from reaching it when his eye catches on your blouse — silk, silvery, fitted so well around your waist. But he doesn’t allow his gaze to linger. That’s not what he came for, that’s not what he is interested in.
He sits down with a heavy sigh and a heavy heart. He takes the first sip, then the second one. The alcohol spreads slowly through him, wicks up the bitterness of disappointment threatening to clot his blood like poison. Jack breathes a little easier by the time he drinks half of his glass. His gaze sweeps over his surroundings — distractedly, uncaring — before it’s drawn to you again.
You’re sitting on a bar stool with your back to him. You brought your work with you — a small black laptop on the counter, the keyboard soundless under your fingers, eyes on the screen. Occasionally, you reach for the same lowball glass — with ice and lemon, half-full — he guesses it’s a gin tonic. You are too locked in to take notice of what’s going on around you. With each new minute Jack finds it harder to look away.
He tells himself the lighting is to blame — it scatters all over your blouse, drips over every crinkle, making the fabric look like molten metal, like white gold. It’s neatly tucked into the waistband of your pants: dark blue, formal, perfectly tight around your thighs. His eyes snag on them — he feels a flash of hunger, a heat that swiftly spills into his bloodstream.
On the periphery of his vision, Jack sees a guy coming your way. He wears a smirk, eyes roaming over you — he takes a moment to appreciate your curves too, before his gaze lazily moves higher, to your face and to whatever you’re working on —
And then he yelps.
A few heads turn in his direction, but you don’t move a muscle, don’t even send him a half-glance. The guy abruptly loses all his feigned determination. But Jack’s determined like no other.
Because now he is curious. Now he has a better reason to keep looking.
Jack straightens on his seat. He searches eagerly for clues — but you don’t give them out easily: no badge, no uniform, no logo of the company you work for. And there’s confidence in your relaxed pose and posture, a hint of cockiness in the slight curve of your back. Two more guys try to hit on you: the first peeks through your shoulder and retreats with a horrified grimace, the second one manages a word or two before you cut him off, and he has to leave with nothing.
And Jack doesn’t even try to rationalize his actions — the pull he feels is the mere reason he stands up, glass in his hand, eyes fixed on you.
He gets the explanation for everyone’s dismay when your laptop’s screen comes into his view. It’s crime scene photos — bright, brutal, bloody: a dead body, deep and frantic wounds left by a knife. Jack’s seen enough of those in real life to not be bothered. But he thinks it’s impressive how unbothered you are.
He leans on the counter, one stool in between you, his voice nonchalant. “That looks like someone’s getting buried in a closed casket.”
“Yes, 17 stab wounds do that to a person,” you reply curtly, fingers flying over the keys.
His eyes flick down your profile and over every feature of your face — your cool demeanor invites no conversation. His gaze darts back at the stained flesh and scattering of cuts.
“It’s not the stabbing that killed her though.”
“Correct,” you still refuse to spare him a glance.
But Jack’s not used to giving up so fast. And maybe he is champing at the bit to glimpse a part of you no one in here was in luck to see.
“Most wounds are in her stomach area. Was she pregnant?”
Your fingers pause at his remark — for just a moment, yet he notices. A corner of his mouth curls. You keep typing but your voice loses a layer of indifference.
“Careful, you already sound smarter than the entire defense team.”
“Now I am tempted to continue. The suspect is a male, I reckon? A boyfriend or a husband?”
You huff a laugh at his insistence. Jack takes half a step closer. And then you turn to get a look at him, at that man who dared to move into your space.
Your gaze is direct, dissecting — like he is on the operation table, and you’re about to masterfully cut him into parts. It is a gaze that doesn’t make apologies for bluntness, it can effortlessly give warnings and make treats. But you choose to show him mercy.
“She wanted to get married. Naively hoped a baby would encourage him to.”
“And he never wanted kids,” Abbot deduces, not hiding his disapproval. “Did he try an impromptu mix of pills for an abortion?”
“That would require some research and also him having more than one brain cell,” your disapproval sounds like dislike. “He just emptied half a bag of heroin into her tea. She, unsurprisingly, OD’ed. Instead of calling 911, he tried to cover it up.”
“So his one brain cell wasn’t present,” Jack gives a snort of disgust. “And what’s his lawyer’s take?”
“He claims she took the drugs herself, then caused a fight. While being on the brink of death, yes,” there is a furrow in your brow, your tone sharp, simmering. “He wants it classified as a third-degree murder, so in a decade his asshole client can walk out on the promise of good behavior. I want him charged with two counts of first-degree murder. Life sentence with no parole.”
You take your cocktail and finish it in barely two sips, then ask the bartender for a third one. You catch Jack’s gaze, and he notes incredulously: “You seem stone-cold sober.”
“Can say the same about you.”
He looks down at his whiskey like he almost forgot he had it. “It’s actually my first.”
You look at him like you are making an incision and carefully assessing his internal damage. When you get your drink — poured over lemon slices and crushed ice — you swiftly move the glass to him. “You should give mine a try.”
“I’m not sure mixing drinks is a good idea—”
“Trust me on this,” you insist, eyes darting to the badge on his black scrubs, the syllables of his last name softly rolling off your tongue. “Dr. Abbot.”
The sound ripples through his chest, like you just pulled a heartstring that no one’s touched in years. “Jack,” he corrects. “Less formal.”
He asks for your name in return and takes your cocktail, gives it a swirl then has a sip. Jack raises his eyebrow at the taste. He tries some more to get a confirmation.
“This is... plain water?”
You nod with a small smile, without a hint of shame. “I don’t enjoy being drunk. But if I sit here with a bottle of Perrier, that would raise questions.”
“So you ask to make it look fancy, like a cocktail,” Jack figures out, then chuckles. “And you suggest that I stop drinking.”
“You haven’t touched your glass in the last 10 minutes. My guess is that you don’t really want to.”
When your eyes meet, he feels like you can see right through, bypassing all the locks he’s been meticulously putting over his emotions. It’s strange, it’s very new to him. It’s also somewhat thrilling.
Jack finally sits on the bar stool next to you. There is a small space between his legs and yours — he doesn’t cross it. You don’t move away. His hand stays clasped around his glass.
“The first half of it felt nice. Like maybe it could dull things down a little. But I don’t like getting drunk, too.”
“Having trouble at work?” you ask simply, with no pity and no pressure.
He thinks it over like he is looking at the baggage — of his past and present, bad and worse, deciding what bag he can open first. Which one’s less scary. “I work night shifts. The last one was pretty rough.”
But you prefer to start with the worst one — eyes trained on the ring he’s wearing. “So you came here to blow off some steam instead of coming home to your wife?”
The words hit him — not like a punch but like a stream of ice-cold water. He isn’t hurt, he’s startled — by how fast you notice things, how straightforward you are with voicing them. Nothing escapes your eye, no matter how deep it’s been buried. And it’s the grave that he almost laid himself in.
The ring was once a promise, then a wound — after his wife’s death, the metal band only reminded of the pain, of how impossible it seemed to ever heal. He knew the exact time she passed, he counted days and hours he managed to survive alone. It was unbearable and crushing, it felt hopeless. Now he only thinks about her once a year.
Jack doesn’t ponder over his answer for too long. He shares the truth as if he’s offering his palms — so you can read the lines and see the scars he usually keeps hidden.
“I’m a widower. This is just...” he twists the ring slowly with his thumb. “Out of a habit, I suppose.”
You turn your whole body to him, your back straight and hands locked together. Like you are about to interrogate him. “And how long you’ve been a widower?”
Jack doesn’t break eye contact. “Five years.”
“What happened?” you hold his gaze with ease.
“Glioblastoma. She was gone in seven months.”
He sees it flicker across your face — the ache of sympathy for him after what he’s been through. The unexpected understanding of what it feels like.
“That is a tough one. It doesn’t leave much at the end,” your voice softens and so does your gaze. “It’s hard to watch someone die like that. I’m really sorry.”
“Someone you knew also had it?” he takes another guess.
He’s on a lucky streak — you drop your gaze because he’s right again. He wishes that he wasn’t.
“My mentor, the first man I worked for. The best one, I think,” your finger traces the cold rim of your glass. Jack almost reaches out to take your hand. “He was too busy to take care of himself, got diagnosed when it was too late for any treatments. He made it to eight months.”
Jack moves his whiskey to your water, clinks his glass with yours. The look you give him offers an apology. He doesn’t need it — the words he gives you only offer kindness:
“I’m sorry you had to see that too.”
There is a lull in your conversation but it’s not awkward, isn’t heavy. It feels like clearing up the space the grief used to take up. It feels a little bit like hope.
Jack clears his throat and points at the gruesome photos on your screen. “Are you even allowed to open these in public?”
You chuckle dryly and roll your eyes. “The case’s been all over the news because his daddy is some pop music producer. You can find the photos on TMZ.” Then you consider him — a night-shift doctor, a tired man, a stranger who tasted the same pain you did. “Although you are probably too busy for stuff like that.”
You close your laptop with one hand, your sharp attention now all on him. Your knees brush his, and you don’t seem uncomfortable with it.
“What happened to you at work?”
Jack lets out a sigh, twiddles with the black band of his watch. “Got a car crash victim. Not sure she will pull through. She also lost her husband and her baby so waking up won’t be much of a relief either.”
“Was there anything you didn’t do? That could’ve saved any of them?”
“No,” he says without a doubt, although with sadness. “He died on impact. She was three months pregnant, so the baby didn’t have a chance.”
“Which means that none of it is your fault. You didn’t kill anyone, you are actually the reason she did get a chance to live,” you tell him calmly.
Jack shakes his head. “Maybe she won’t.”
“Maybe she will.”
“You are being optimistic,” he argues, a tad glum.
“I’m being rational. Give it a try,” you retort.
“Yes, I’m sure that some good-old rationalizing will make me feel a lot better,” his words don’t bite, but there’s frustration in his gaze, in how he rubs the back of his neck.
“Okay, I’ll do it for you,” and then you lean to him, one knee sliding in between his two, your perfume redolent of bergamot and jasmine, fresh and a tad sweet. Jack is dumbfounded by how close you are, how casually you do it. He makes an effort not to follow the streak of light that sneaks down your neckline. Your eyes are set firmly on him like you’re dead set on changing his whole world. He lets you.
“How many patients did you treat this week? I don’t need the exact number, an approximate will do.”
“I don’t know, over 40. Maybe 50.”
“Let’s say it’s 45. How many of them died? Just those two?” — he gives you a short nod. You move an inch closer so he can hear you over the other voices that already fill the bar. “How many of them were women of fertile age?”
“What?” he blinks with pure puzzlement, his hand going from his neck back to the counter, bumping into yours. “How would I know that, I don’t really—”
“In the US, females outnumber males by less than 1%, and about one-third of them are over 65. Which means around 16 women you treated probably can have kids,” the space between you is shortened by another inch. “Let’s say 10 of them want to and they will. That’s at least 10 babies that will be born because you didn’t fuck up. 10 babies after just one week of you being a good doctor. 40 babies after a month and 480 in one year.”
He doesn’t bother with the counting — instead, he notices: the fragrance you’re wearing also has notes of peach and lilies. And your close presence and your voice make all the noise around him disappear.
“You’re good with numbers,” Jack says with quiet fascination.
“I’m good at recognizing shitty people,” you tell him plainly, your thumb brushing his wrist — on accident, he thinks, but his whole arm warms up. “I’ve dealt with doctors who maimed their patients like it meant nothing. I’ve seen them make the stupidest mistakes they didn’t think twice about. But if you care too much, you need to rewire your brain to make it easier to function,” and when your palm covers his hand — it’s unmistakably intentional, it is a feeling he forgot existed: the comfort of a simple touch. “So next time things don’t work out — not even because of something you did, but because shit happens, — instead of wearing sackcloth and ashes, think of the dozens of chubby babies and dozens of families you gave a chance at happiness because you did everything right.”
You tell it to him like it’s indisputable, the truth that’s carved in stone. Deep down, he is aware that he’s good at what he does and bad at taking credit for it, sometimes downright refusing. But he couldn’t argue with you even if he wanted. Because Jack’s struggling to get his head together — the struggle comes from your hand still being pressed to his. And now that he knows the feeling of your skin, it’s hard to act like just one touch will be enough. Like he isn’t in dire need of more.
“I’ve never thought about it like that,” Jack manages, and it isn’t a lie. The truth lies deeper: he never thought he’d want someone like that, never imagined feeling so touch-starved.
“You should. Maybe you’re single-handedly responsible for keeping this city’s population up,” you smile at him, and it’s sincere. But you’re looking at him like he’s an open book and his feelings are as clear as ink on paper.
And you don’t take your hand away, and Jack can feel the pull again. He welcomes it.
“You keep saying things like that, and it will get to my head,” his voice gets low too — and it’s him who is leaning forward.
Your gaze isn’t wavering from his. “And what’s the worst thing that can happen?”
He doesn’t waver when he says: “I’ll dare to take more risks.”
“What will the first one be?”
“Asking if I can take you home.”
You aren’t surprised and aren’t scandalized. You don’t even take time to think. “Are you suggesting I should wrap up my work session?”
“I think you already did,” a smile ghosts Jack’s lips.
The effect whiskey had on him was fleeting. You are way more intoxicating. Your palm is at his elbow, and his pulse is racing, and for how rational and logic-driven he usually is, this time he doesn’t want to be: he thinks of taking you away from prying eyes, he thinks of kissing you, he thinks he can give one-night stands a go —
There is a sound of sottish laughter, then something splashing and someone cursing. Not much liquid gets on your blouse but Jack gets on his foot like he’s about to get into a fight. The guy who spilled his cocktail on you is too slow-witted to access the threat. You quickly put yourself between them, your hand blindly finding Jack’s, your fingers on his wrist. And instantly his anger goes down by half.
The clumsy partygoer sends you a smirk. “Your man looks like he wants to say somethin'.”
“And you look like someone who doesn’t want to be thrown out of the bar on a random Thursday. Keep walking,” you tell him in a tone so cold, he sobers up, losing his smirk. The guy apologizes incoherently and darts away to blend into the crowd.
When you turn to Jack, he is already looking at you. “Are you okay?”
“I’m pretty sure it was a Mojito, and he mostly spilled the ice. It won’t even leave a stain. I’m just gonna pay a visit to the hand dryer in the bathroom,” you put the laptop in its slim black bag and leave a few bills on the counter. “You probably should wait outside,” and then your hand glides lightly over his chest, like you’re smoothing out his shirt. “Wouldn’t want any drinks spilled on you.”
And as Jack watches you walk — each step with purpose, hips swaying — he surely feels like he needs some air.
By now, the rain has eased, and through the thinned-out clouds he can see wisps of sunset, beads of pink and yellow. And in the chill of the approaching night, his confidence wanes just a little. Isn’t he too old for this? Aren’t you too good for him? How long has it been since he had someone in his bed? The last one he actually knows a clear answer to. It’s hardly reassuring.
Jack catches the sound of your heeled boots before you come out — with no stain on the blouse, no hesitation in your gaze. He knows the more he waits, the less likely he is to go through with it. So he says it — quickly, like ripping off a bandaid:
“My apartment is just around the corner.”
And he thinks you are about to decline. His misperception lasts for barely five seconds — and then your face splits into a smile: not pitying, not forced, but bright like the sunlight he’s been missing. Your words come out a tad pensive:
“You know, I was having such a bad day when I came to the bar.”
“Was?” Jack echoes, eyes on you, all his uncertainty replaced by skin-prickling excitement. He will have you, even if only once. Because you want this, too.
“I think my night might be way better,” you come closer as you give him confirmation: it’s in your mellow gaze, in fingers raring to touch him — they graze his arm, shoulder, base of his neck. The smile never leaves your face. “Your apartment sounds like a good start.”
And Jack wants to kiss you so fucking badly. But not on the steps of some overcrowded bar.
Not while you’re rushing through the drizzle, and your hand catches his, and he holds onto it without thinking. Not at the bus stop where you take a break, and you soak up the fading sunshine with your eyes closed, your skin glowing, his heart skipping a beat, twice. Not in the lobby of his building you walk through hand in hand. Not in the elevator — not even when you press the top button without asking.
“How did you guess?” he wonders, his gaze focused on your lips. He catches you looking at his before you give a reply.
“I just prefer the top floor, too.”
Jack lets you in first and locks the door behind him, not in a hurry but a little bit on edge. He’s trying not to be self-conscious about every part of his apartment. You take your shoes off, your laptop and your phone left on the hinged shelf at the entrance. And then you take it all in, but you aren’t scrutinizing or perplexed or judging. You look around like it’s exactly how you pictured it, like everything about his place makes sense.
The contrast of light walls and dark parquet, a small amount of furniture — minimalistic, spotless, simple. But there is a scattering of things that catch your gaze. A stack of old CDs and a small Sony player, the plastic case already rubbed off at the corners. A tier of books with countless bookmarks tucked between the pages. A pile of med journals and printouts of studies with his jotting in the margins, a dozen multi-colored pens stacked into a whiskey glass. A coffee table that you can tell was made by hand — black walnut wood, coarse-grained, a few tool marks around the apron. You delicately trace them with your finger in silent appreciation of his dedication and his skill. Jack barely can remember why he was even worried.
And then you step into his bedroom, and he can think of nothing else.
It’s half-dark, the floor windows left uncovered because he was in a rush to leave. You keep the lights off. You walk to where the twilight is bleeding through the glass, the hues of red and violet covering the floor. The dim light contours the collar of your blouse, the specks of silver shimmering like moonlight on the water. Jack is so mesmerized, he doesn’t catch it right away — the way your fingers move down to the row of buttons. You turn to face him with the first one carelessly undone.
“I thought you’d want to take this off yourself,” you then unbutton the second one — and look him in the eye. “Do you?”
“You can’t seriously have doubts,” he rasps, his pupils blown wide, mouth craving yours — or any part of you that you can give him.
Your hands stop. And then your voice drops, beckoning. “What are you waiting for?”
Jack crosses the distance in a heartbeat.
It’s not a crash — it feels like it’s a fusion, your body molding perfectly against his as soon as he pulls you closer by the hips. You meet him not with hesitation but with need, your lips sure, soft, searing — he kisses you back so fervently, it makes his head dizzy. It makes him want you more. Your every move sets fire in him, and you tend to it with skill: you grip his shirt with one hand, the other tracing up his spine — until it settles at his nape, your fingers threading through his hair, and his breath hitches. You only pull away to give him air and guide both of his hands up to your blouse. His frail composure barely lasts another minute while he works the buttons — until he sees your bra: thin black lace.
“You wear this on a random Thursday?” Jack groans, then dips his head to leave hot open-mouth kisses down your chest. He tugs at the lace slightly with his teeth, and you tug at his hair.
“Try not to tear it apart,” you tell him, half a joke and half a warning; but your tone suggests that you won’t mind.
His lips find yours again because he can’t stop craving them, hands wandering under your blouse as he walks you blindly to the bed. You’re a step away, and his imagination already paints the picture — your body naked and writhing under his mouth — but then you grab into his clothes, maneuvering him to turn — and in a second he is pushed onto the mattress. Time freezes for the shortest moment as you look him over, your lips parted, your fingertips skating up his cheek, and Jack leans instantly into your touch. With the same hand you bring his mouth back to yours, and now you share the same hunger: you straddle him and tug at the black scrubs and the white t-shirt he wears under, and Jack is fumbling with your bra clasp, too eager and too lost in you —
The pain’s not sharp but sudden. It shoots from his knee up to the hip, and Jack flinches with a hiss, breaking the kiss.
“What’s wrong?” you instantly pull back, studying his face.
Jack feels blood rushing to his cheeks. He shifts uncomfortably in place. “It’s my leg.”
You look down. “Which one?”
He stifles an embarrassed sigh and grudgingly hitches up his right pant leg, revealing the prosthesis. “My muscles cramp up sometimes when I bend the knee,” Jack moves one hand down to help stretch his leg forward, the metal frame catching the light.
You keep your eyes on it as you say musingly: “Oh, you are full of surprises, Dr. Abbot.”
You make a face he can’t match to an emotion — is it regret? Are you disappointed? Will you leave now? But then you reach your hand to where the prosthesis meets the limb and carefully trace the scarred tissue. Your touch is light at first, but slowly you apply more pressure, your thumb and middle finger massaging the sides of his leg.
“Do you need to remove it?” you ask, not bothered in the slightest.
“Not yet,” Jack breathes out in relief, feeling the pain and tension fading — as is his shame.
And when he meets your gaze, you read him once again: his fears, his insecurities, everything he’s used to hide and overthink. And your eyes sparkle with an intent to prove him wrong. You move your fingers up his leg, unhurriedly, unwavering, making a teasing stop to dip your thumb under the waistband of his pants. He almost bucks up his hips. You hitch his shirts up and drag over his head, then throw aside with one quick motion — and when your fingertips skim under his navel, Jack lets out a quivering exhale. Your hands slide up his chest, his every muscle tensing under your touch, your body leaning closer inch by inch, until he feels your breath fanning his face.
Your words are quiet but they burn his mouth: “There isn’t a part of you I don’t find hot.”
Jack can’t think of a time he ever felt so wanted. He also can’t do much thinking when you are kissing him, your tongue darting between his lips, your hips grinding against him, and he is getting harder with each second, with each movement.
“Sorry, should’ve told you sooner,” he mumbles when you break apart. “Didn’t want to ruin the moment.”
Your laughter tickles in the crook between his neck and shoulder, your lips mapping a route to the hollow of his throat. And then your kisses travel higher — the slope of his jaw, the spot behind his ear — and he is aching to get more, and he can never get enough.
“You can’t possibly ruin this,” your eyes are locked on him again so he knows that you mean it. “You barely touched me, and I’m already soaked.”
Jack sucks in a breath. His palm moves to lay flat against your stomach, then glides behind your waistband, to where you’re waiting for his touch. He feels the wetness through the lace — you spread your legs wider — and he pushes the black material aside to find you slick, warm, already throbbing.
His eyes look a shade darker in the amber of the dusk. “This all for me?” Jack asks dazedly, his finger teasing at your entrance.
“Wanna do something about it?” you murmur.
He slips a finger in, drawing a moan from your lips — the sound goes straight to his cock. His other hand moves to your hip, presses you into him so you can feel the bulge beneath his pants. And then Jack starts thrusting into you, precise and fast, his tentativeness melting away like ice on fire.
“How am I doing?” his tone teases.
And he already has his answer — it’s in the sounds you make, in how your hips are moving eagerly to meet his finger. He adds a second one and hears you gasp.
“Good, s-so— fucking good,” you babble. “Didn’t expect— o-ooh anything less.”
It fuels his confidence like nothing else. He leans to you a little, his voice is thick with lust. “Take the blouse off. I don’t want to ruin it.”
Although he sounds pretty ruined himself. And you aren’t shy about reveling in it. Slowly, you let the silver fabric fall halfway down your back — and then your fingers run over your bra and tug roughly at your nipples. Jack watches, spellbound, not blinking, as they harden under the lace.
At last, he yields to his desire since it can no longer be contained. And Jack is nothing if not ravenous for you.
He pulls your bra straps down with his teeth — one then the other — and then his lips are on your skin, leaving a wet trail between your breasts; he pumps his fingers in and out, and they go knuckles-deep. He adds a third, his tongue flickering over your nipple before he gives it a light bite — and you are withering, and struggling for breath, and pleading — yes, please, Jack, d-don’t stop — and he can cum just from you gasping out his name. It doesn’t take much longer: he hits the right spot, not randomly but expertly, his thumb pressed to your clit, his every stroke commanding you to let go — and you do. Your mouth falls slack and your whole body stills, like you are struck by lightning, electric currents rippling through your veins until your blood is sweltering like you’re caught on fire.
Your thighs tremble when he pulls his fingers out. And through the half-closed eyes, you watch as his tongue darts to taste your wetness that his hand is drenched in. You reach for it without warning and lick his fingers clean. Jack groans at the sight — and then you’re swallowing that sound with your mouth. The kiss is messy, tongues and teeth — your blouse and bra join his clothes on the floor before Jack lifts you off him and drops on onto the bed. He gets your pants and panties off, tosses aside and spreads your legs — you are left fully naked, and he drinks you up: your skin the heat is rising off, the parts of you he is desperate to put his mouth on. He readily bends towards you, his kisses climbing higher — from your calf to your knee to the inside of your thigh —
“Come up,” you whisper like an order, and he obeys with bated breath.
Your lips collide, and there is intensity that makes the world around him fade, the vestiges of his old doubts reduced to ashes. You don’t feel like a blaze that scorches and leaves marks — no scratches on his back, no bruises where you touch him — instead, your hands are tender. And he is melting all the same. So when you push him on his side, then on his back, and sit on top of him, Jack voices no complaints.
You aren’t hasty with his remaining clothes — you drag the pants down first, careful around his prosthesis, curios about the traces of his past: your fingers run over the scar on his left knee, over the other on his thigh. And then your eyes move to his briefs, to the sharp outline of his cock. You pull the fabric down to free him — thick, leaking, reddened at the tip. It takes you one — two — three slow strokes — and Jack is trembling all over, his quiet exhale breaking into a low moan.
He points at the bedside table, stumbling over the words. “I forgot to— You should— Top drawer.”
You find them in the bottom one — a couple of condoms shoved into the corner like he thought they’d never be of use. You pick one, sit back on the bed, and tear the wrapper open. And then you put the condom in between your lips and teeth. You purposefully keep eye contact as you get lower — and take him in your mouth, pushing the condom slowly over his cock. Jack flinches, and his head falls back, a loud gasp ripped from his throat.
“F-fucking hell.”
You hollow your cheeks on your way up, then pull off and use your fingers to roll the condom down to the base. He stays still, hands clutching the sheets so hard, the lines of veins pop on his arms, his stomach muscles tense — as is his voice. “Don’t,” Jack pleads through gritted teeth, “I won’t last a minute.”
A grin touches your lips like you already knew he wouldn’t. Your hands go higher so he can take a breath. Your fingertips ghost across his chest, unspooling stiffness from his body and waiting for his reticence to vanish like dew in heat. And when it does, Jack pulls you closer by the arm, pulls you into a kiss that steals the air from your lungs and tastes like pure need. And it’s a need you share.
You promptly grind your hips against his, coating his cock in your arousal, only a few quick moves before you lift your thighs and slip him inside. A shudder travels through your body as he stretches you, as he finally fills you, the pleasure so intense it stuns you both. It takes you a good minute to regain your senses. You roll your hips a couple of times and then start riding him — and almost effortlessly, you find the rhythm that leaves Jack in raptures. It feels electrifying, all-consuming, desire flaring up his every cell, spreading down to his bones. And then you’re both aflame.
Jack sits up, hands roaming over you — his fingers on your hips to help you move, then toying with your nipples to make you gasp. His lips are on your throat where your rugged breath mixes with moans. You try to find the words for it — this feels s-so — fuck, Jack, you are sooo — but you are too overwhelmed to speak, and he is too transfixed on you to care. He feels that you’re getting close — your pace quickens and your voice quavers, hands clinging to his shoulders for support. And he is barrelling toward his orgasm just as fast. He breathes you in and holds you tight, heat trapped between your skin and his as you are arching into him, so soft and pliant and cock-drunk.
It is the friction of your body against his that throws you over the edge — you cry out, face buried in the curve of his neck like you are seeking shelter, unraveling so helplessly and willingly like he’s the only one allowed to have you like this. And in a second the orgasm rips through Jack — euphoric, blinding, emptying, the closest that he’s ever been to ecstasy and to losing his mind.
You are both panting, limbs entangled, your chest still pressed to his.
“I think I need a moment,” you mumble, your fingertips grazing his shoulder blades.
“Yeah, same,” Jack breathes out. “Feeling a little rusty after all these years.”
He doesn’t register the meaning of his words until you slightly pull away. The room is slipping into darkness, but he can see emotions in your eyes, like glints of the sun setting: amazement first, too obvious to hide — was he alone for five whole years? But then there is empathy and an unspoken gratitude — for you being the one that he decided to let in.
You move your hand to cup his face, a smile pulling at the edges of your mouth. “You are very far from rusty, Dr. Abbot.”
Jack leans in first, like he can’t help it — your lips meet his like you want nothing else. And you kiss him so softly, so unhurriedly, it is the kind of fondness that soothes wounds. When he draws back, he is suffused with peace, like all the damage he’s been carrying no longer weighs on him.
Jack puts the blanket over you, up to the very shoulders, and pecks your lips. “Stay right here.”
Begrudgingly, he slides out of you and snaps off the condom, then pulls up his briefs and staggers to his feet. He finds your panties and helps you put them on, his palms following the contours of your thighs like he’s appreciating art. Jack chugs some water in the kitchen, then pours you a glass — and on his way back, he rummages through his wardrobe and drags out a clean t-shirt.
“In case you want something to sleep in,” he offers as you empty the glass. “I don’t know if—”
You take the shirt without question and put it on — and then you take his hand and pull him into bed. He lies down on his back and takes off the prosthesis, letting it slide down to the floor. You drape your arm over his chest and snuggle up to him, already heavy-eyed. You trace his shoulder with your finger, then press a small kiss on it.
“I really like your arms,” you murmur sleepily.
He really likes holding you in these arms, Jack realizes. He is amazed at how easy it comes, of how much he doesn’t want to let you go.
And it feels ridiculous to ask but he can’t help it. “What about my arms?”
He can tell by your slowing breath that you are dozing off. Still, you manage in a whisper: “They are very... steady.”
He thinks about asking for your phone number. And then his mind is flooded by the faded fantasies that promptly take on color: tables for two at restaurants, fresh flowers wrapped in kraft paper, your hands that fit so well in his. Jack gently brushes a stray hair from your forehead when his eye catches on his wedding ring. He looks at it for a few seconds — but the metal band has long lost its meaning. So Jack takes the ring off and carefully turns in bed to put it in the top drawer. And then he tugs you closer, your body warm against his as he falls into the comforting embrace of sleep.
When he wakes up, the warmth’s still there.
His legs are humming, but he isn’t weary, like all the tension’s been unweaved from his sore muscles. Like he’s just had the best sleep in months. But when his hand moves to the side, he finds the bed empty — and instantly he’s overcome with what feels like loss, although he knows it shouldn’t. Because one-night stands aren’t supposed to last. Your scent still lingers on the pillowcase — crisp, clean, raindrops caught in the petals at the sunrise. He turns his head to breathe it in, eyes slowly falling shut —
And then Jack hears it.
The clinking.
The sound usually made by forks, knives, plates. The sound that’s coming from his kitchen.
Jack rubs his eyes and sits up, the remnants of his sleep dissolving in the air. He notices his clothes left neatly folded on the dresser, the prosthesis propped against his side of the bed. And his heart rushes at the thought: you did this for him. And you didn’t leave.
He gets up and gets dressed — but his every move is quiet. Quieter than usual. It is anxiety that turns into anticipation with every step he takes to where the small noises come from. And then he walks into the kitchen like he is walking into a dream he never thought would come to life.
The place is sunlit, the bright rays sprinkling specks of gold on every surface: the metal handles of the cupboards, the scuffed edges of the chairs, the glass table, and the plates on it. And then there’s you, bathing in sunlight, legs bare and hair loose — and his breath catches at the sight. You move around like you’ve already been here, like it’s a habit you just naturally follow: preparing a breakfast for him, in his kitchen, in his clothes. You are still wearing the t-shirt — it hangs loosely around your shoulders but sits tighter at your hips. Jack thinks he’d like to see all of his shirts on you.
“Did I wake you up?” you ask without turning to him, still stirring something in the pan.
“No,” his voice is hoarse from sleep. His nose picks up the smells of sizzling bacon, of something frying, sweet and spicy. “I see, you found the spatula. I genuinely thought I lost it.”
Jack hears the smile in your voice. “It’s not too complicated of a system you’ve got in here.”
Is there a system? He wasn’t aware. He unintentionally says it out loud, and you laugh softly.
“I mean, I see the logic behind it. Knives in the top drawer because you use them the most. Sometimes instead of forks, I’m guessing, because the forks were pushed so deep into the second drawer, like they hadn’t seen the light in weeks. Teaspoons stored in one of your three mugs since you only use them to stir coffee. Two tablespoons were probably left there by accident — and these are all you have, so I suspect you are no fan of soups,” you turn the stove off and move the pan onto the metal trivet, the sun beams skimming up your legs. “I do appreciate that you store all plates and bowls in one place. Although that is the only cupboard that doesn’t creak, so I am a little bit concerned by how often you actually use your dishes. The spatula was in the frying pan, by the way.”
Jack feels his heart swell with a feeling he is yet to name. You look at him over your shoulder as if you didn’t sort through his decades of chaos in a minute. “Come here, try this.”
And you don’t have to ask him twice because he’s always eager to cross the distance.
Jack walks closer, his chest brushing your back, arm circling around your waist. You scoop some food and bring it into his mouth. And almost instantly, involuntarily, he can’t hold back a hum of satisfaction.
“Wait, what is this?”
He sees your lips curling into a smile. “Food, Jack. Eggs and bacon and the two tomatoes that looked edible.”
“That’s not how they usually taste.”
You fully turn to him, another spoonful disappearing into his mouth. “Ever heard of the word flavor? You do know spices exist, right?”
He is a little torn between wanting to kiss you and stealing yet another bite. “I just use salt.”
“I figured. Your salt container is almost empty,” your smile grows wider. You wipe the corner of his mouth with your finger. “But I found a jar of Taco Seasoning in your top cupboard, so I guess you have your moments of enlightenment.”
“Got it for free when I bought a new frying pan. Half a year ago,” and you two move as if you share an instinct: he takes you by the hips, and you step back, ass pressed against the counter — and then you swiftly sit on it, and he stands in between your legs.
You pick a crispy bacon strip — he bites off a half and you eat the rest. His hands stay on your thighs as you give him two more.
“What did you do with the bacon?”
“I baked it,” your phone buzzes nearby but you ignore it, instead reaching for the pan. Jack takes it, and he doesn’t bother with the plates: he feeds you scrambled eggs himself with the utmost diligence. On the fourth spoon you lean to peck his lips, and a smile breaks across his face, eyes crinkling at the corners. And suddenly he is so palpably aware of how much he wants more mornings spent like this. With you.
You give him more bacon, and he can’t refuse it, your fingertips brushing his lips as he takes hungry bites. “It feels less greasy. In a good way.”
“Because I didn’t add too much oil. There is already fat in bacon,” you take the spoon from him and scrape the leftovers off the pan, maneuvering the food into his mouth before he can protest. “Just so you know, I think that not having toasted bread at breakfast is a crime. I’m only cutting you some slack because you had a tough shift.”
He’s struggling to hide a grin. Jack drops the dishes in the sink, then moves closer to you, hands clasped around your waist. He leaves a light kiss on your shoulder.
“Where did you learn to cook?”
“A lot of my clients are immigrants. They often bring me meals as a thank you, and I always ask what they put in,” you gently comb your fingers through the grey curls framing his forehead. Jack leans in, and you bump your nose into his. “Now, I’m not gonna open a Mexican restaurant anytime soon... But I do know my spices.”
Your phone buzzes again, and when Jack’s gaze falls on the screen, he reads the words out loud without a second thought.
“You just received a file called SA (identified 14/01–20),” and then his smile fades. “Does that mean sexual assault?”
Immediately, your face changes — from relaxed to focused: you quickly get off the counter and grab your phone. Jack manages to catch the names of two more files: 10/21–40, 18/41–60.
“That’s classified,” you don’t sound angry but your tone loses its warmth.
You get another notification, your face tensing with concentration. Jack doesn’t want to interrupt but there’s an inkling tugging at his chest.
“It must be something bad,” he remarks.
“It is,” you tell him matter-of-factly, eyes on the screen. It takes a long moment for you to add. “Involves sex trafficking. That’s all I can say.”
A bad feeling creeps over him like frost. He’s got no explanation for it, no real reason to ask questions. So he keeps them to himself. “Sounds like a difficult case.”
Jack isn’t sure you can hear him, your finger sliding over the screen as you keep reading, mindless of the minutes flying by. In about ten you finally look up, gaze distant, wheels in your head turning, some kind of critical decision taking shape. And then it’s not exactly a relief — but clarity that he sees in your eyes, courage and sharp resolve.
“For almost a year it was an impossible case. Now I think I’ve got a real chance at it,” you share with him, half a confession, half a hope. “I have to go,” you sigh, then put the phone down and move to take the clean plates left forgotten on the table.
Jack catches your hand. “Don’t even think about it. I’ll do it.”
He watches you run toward the bedroom, then he pensively takes the plates away. And the unnerving questions keep swarming his head: how dangerous exactly is your job? Are there any safety measures you should take? Do you? It’s probably not his place to ask. It doesn’t make him any less concerned.
He looks at the jar of Taco Seasoning. He thinks of you folding his clothes, easing his fears. Of your laugh brushing his shoulder. Of how easily you fit everywhere in his life, like you are the only part that he’s been missing. He really should ask for your number.
You run back fully dressed — the pants you look sinfully good in, the blouse glistening like liquid silver. Your collarbones peek through, and Jack wants to place a kiss on each.
“You’re now out of mouthwash, so here’s a reminder,” you place a post-it note on his fridge, a few words you wrote in cursive. “And I almost forgot my phone.”
You rush to take it, you are just about to leave. But then you turn on your heels and quickly walk back to Jack, eyes on his mouth — until your lips are too. The kiss is soft for barely a second — and then it’s hot and deep, and Jack’s mind instantly goes blank.
“Don’t forget you’re the best doctor in town,” you smile against his mouth.
You walk out, and he’s left standing in the kitchen, wrapped up in pure bliss. His lips still tingle from the kiss, his body warm all over, the time melting away under the bright sunlight. But soon the realization cuts through his oblivion like a knife through cotton:
he didn’t get your number.
He has no clue where to find you.
Jack literally facepalms himself. And unsurprisingly, he doesn’t find you outside when he runs out of his flat, out of the building. And there are no crumbs that he can follow. Of course, he goes back to the bar — you paid in cash, no card info, they didn’t even ask for your ID. The bartender assures that you’ve never visited before. When Jack learns there are over 7000 lawyers in Pittsburgh, it feels like a lost cause. But he’s not used to giving up so fast. So he spends his free time searching the web: he googles law firms in the area, looks through the countless photos on their sites. And every time he’s in his kitchen, he stares at the blue note left on the fridge:
Buy a mouthwash (and some bread. Carbs are good for you!)
He buys both. One of his pillows smells like you, and he sleeps on the other; your perfume fades in 11 days. And in two weeks his hope starts fading too. He does attempt to look for the bright side of things — now he has something to remember, a reassurance that he isn’t too old for trying something new — but all the memories inevitably lead to one conclusion: he doesn’t want to try again. He just wants you.
And maybe there is a slim chance that you will come back to the bar, Jack tells himself. He goes there in his free evenings, his order boringly the same: just water, but throw some ice and lemon in. The bartender takes pity on him and doesn’t charge him half the time. And Jack keeps looking through the faces on the streets, in the ER, even while he’s driving down the road.
But never in a million years he expected this.
The people he’s surrounded with also find your current situation unexpected. You look up at them, gaze filled with the same unswerving perseverance. Your tone carries just the right amount of sharpness:
“Doesn’t E in the ER stand for emergency? Can we move?”
You don’t see him yet. Jack still can’t look away.
Langdon comes to his senses first. He grabs fresh gloves and rushes to you. “Okay, what am I looking at?”
You glance at him like he is looking stupid.
“Gunshot wounds. We stopped the bleeding from his leg, about 30 minutes ago. But the other one was worse, blood started spurting everywhere. And you can’t put a tourniquet over the chest. So I improvised.”
Frank quirks a brow. “And your first instinct was to stick your fingers in him?”
“You want me to remove them?”
“Do not!” Robby firmly cuts in. “Dr. Langdon just poorly phrased his appreciation for your quick thinking,” he glowers at him. Then finally, they wheel away the gurney you are on. “Let’s take you to trauma#1.”
Your shoulders fall a little — just enough for Jack to notice, your free hand holding tight to one of the side rails. He reads it in your body language: the tension from the inconvenient position, the stress of not knowing what happens next. As you pass by, for only a brief moment your eyes meet. And it’s pathetic how much he cares what you think. If you remember him. If you’ve been reliving that one night too. He discerns glimmers in your gaze — of recognition and surprise, of what he dares to believe is joy —
but then you break eye contact. And Jack follows you with zero hesitation.
The man’s blood pressure plummets on your way to the room. When you are all in, Robby does his best to navigate the turmoil:
“The bullet must’ve nicked an artery. We might need to open him up.”
“They’ll do that in the OR. If he lives for that long,” Frank says while intubating.
“Shouldn’t you take the bullet out?” Jesse is putting an IV line in.
“What are his chances?” you ask quietly. They don’t hear it, but Jack does. He’s standing at the doors, eyes darting from the patient’s vitals back to you. The one person that he cares for is not the injured man.
“We don’t have time to look for a bullet. Once she takes her hand out, he’ll bleed out within 5 minutes,” Frank notes grimly.
Robby is looking at the ultrasound image on the screen: heart and lungs miraculously unharmed. “Then we have 5 minutes to clamp the artery.”
“It can also be 2. We don’t know how much blood he lost,” Frank glances at the gurney doused with crimson. “My guess is that it’s a lot.”
“Do you have anything to offer apart from your pessimism? We’ll clamp the artery and hook him to another blood bag, that’s the plan.”
“And if he goes into cardiac arrest?”
“Is that a serious question?”
“We can’t use a D-fib while her hand is in.”
“Then she’ll take it out, that’s not exactly a complicated process.”
“Do we know if he’s a donor? Because chances are that —”
“He can’t die!” you snap, and there’s so much emotion in your voice, the room goes quiet for a moment.
Jack steps closer, then grabs a gown and gloves on autopilot, but his gaze is riveted to you. You’re only looking at the man who very much is on the verge of dying.
“He’s got a family. He’s been married since 22, she is the love of his life, they have two kids — both miracle babies, a boy and a girl, and they love them to pieces. And he knew that testifying publicly would be dangerous — but he still agreed. He said what if that was my baby, what if someone did that to her? How can I stay silent?” you recollect ruefully but your words are measured. “He can’t die. Not just because I have my whole case built on his testimony but because he was brave enough to do the right thing when no one else wanted to. I can’t let him die for that. Please, you have to do something.”
“Damn, I wish you were my lawyer,” Frank blurts out.
And you answer in an instant, not even looking at him. “Deal.”
“... Really?”
“Save him, and I’ll help any of you, doesn’t matter what’s it about. I take cases pro bono, so it will be one of those.”
Langdon narrows his eyes as if he doesn’t buy it, his voice a mix of skeptical and wry. “Can I have that in writing?”
If looks could cut, Frank would’ve been hemorrhaging on the floor. You glance at him from under your brows, your stare is withering and sharp, a blade that’s glowing red. His face changes like he’s regretting everything he said. And Jack can’t stop the thought: you can be drenched in blood and fuming — and he still won’t look at anybody else.
“My hands are a little busy at the moment,” you tell Frank dryly. “But you have my word. Now the ball is in your field.”
Jack makes a step to you. “You are into soccer?”
When your gaze darts to him, it isn’t cutting — but more so daring. “I’m into winning.”
“Makes two of us,” Abbot notes smoothly.
Robby’s eyes move from you to Jack, like he can glimpse something he doesn’t know what he should call. Frank looks between you like he’s connecting two big dots barely an inch apart. He bites back a smirk.
The monitors get loud as the man goes into cardiac arrest. Robby immediately pushes the ultrasound machine away. “You need to remove your hand now.”
“I’ll help her down,” Jack rushes up to you, and you watch as the others cut off the man’s clothes, preparing defibrillator pads, an intubation tube, clean cloths.
When they’re ready, Robby grabs a hemostat — and steps close. “Okay, move.”
You take your fingers out — Jack hooks his arm around your waist and swiftly drags you backward. Your legs tingle from the rush of blood, your feet a little bit unsteady when you stand. Jack’s palm lays firmly at your lower back, his voice quiet.
“You alright?”
You freeze for a few seconds, staring straight ahead — at the blood pouring, staining the skin, the metal pads, the gurney — the D-fib is charged once — twice — electric shocks sent to the heart. Then Jesse charges the machine again — and on the third attempt the loud beeping gives way to a more measured sound. The intricacies of dealing with a bleed are left to your imagination because you can’t see anything from behind the doctors' backs.
You slowly turn to Jack, as if you’re still thinking over the answer to his question. You can’t come up with a reply concise enough to fit all of your feelings in. You just nod — he doesn’t push for more, his hand on you drawing small circles.
“The bathroom is down the hall to your left. You can hang out at the nurse station while he’s in here.”
You look down at your blooded shirt, then at your palms. “Do you think he’ll make it?” you ask him in a whisper, unprompted, knowing full well that he won’t lie.
And Jack doesn’t.
“At his age and with how much blood he lost, it is a miracle he’s still alive. Which I think means he’s actually got a chance. If they manage to stabilize him—”
Robby half-turns to look at him. “Jack, we really need an extra pair of hands here!” and there’s an urging in his voice, a red splatter on his gown.
“Guess now I’m a part of the saving team,” Abbot mumbles, changing gloves again, wishing he could give you more — if not a promise then at least some hope.
Surely, Jack’s had his fair share of cases more unhopeful — he’s usually good at keeping a cool head, he’s skilled enough to keep his nerves in check. And yet, he feels a pinprick of anxiety: this case is different because he can’t allow himself to fail you.
But when Jack glances at you, the look you give him is not expectant — it’s encouraging. “Seems like his chances just got better,” you manage a small smile. “I’ll let you get to work.”
Him being able to shift focus to the patient is actually another miracle. And work he does: there is more blood because the artery’s too fragile — they change the clamps, they try the wound packing; it’s equally unhelpful. Jack ends up sticking his own fingers in while Robby calls Garcia. She shows up not only quickly but also uncharacteristically excited.
Yolanda flips open an instrument container she brought in. “Aortic hydragrip clamps, they’re gentler. Should work,” then she sees Jack and chuckles. “Of course, you’d be the one to clamp it with your hand. Just like in the good old military days?”
“Can’t say I’ve missed those,” Abbot remarks, and he is void of bitterness: the military did give him plenty of experience so it’s not something he regrets. But he is honest when he says he doesn’t want to go back.
And neither does he want any memories to pop up, so Jack’s mind hooks on the task that calls for his attention. They move with coordination honed over the years: he takes his hand out — Robby goes in with the clamp — Jack takes the second one — the ruptured artery is occluded in barely 20 seconds. They watch it for 10 more to make sure no more blood is coming out.
Robby allows himself a sigh of relief while Jesse suctions the excessive blood. Langdon inspects the leg wound: the bullet went right through, the bone’s intact. He checks the tourniquet — good placement, tight enough, so he just leaves it on.
Garcia comes closer, with an unbothered kind of curiosity, like a cat’s. “I heard the man made quite an entrance.”
Frank huffs. “You should’ve seen his lawyer.”
“The one in the blooded shirt? Oh, yeah, she’s hard to miss,” Yolanda smirks, dark eyes darting to you.
Jack can’t stop himself from looking in the same direction. You’re in the hall talking to Dana, your hands folded over your chest. The blood on you dried up; still, it strikes the eye — a big splotch of dark maroon on the white fabric, and every time Jack looks at you, it startles him a little.
“What now?” he asks. Mostly to make Garcia stop staring at you.
She does, her gaze on the unconscious man again. And her decision-making process is rather quick. “Suture the origin of the artery with pledgets on the aortic wall, then do a bypass between the ascending aorta and the subclavian. For the anastomosis, I’m thinking a termino-lateral type would do the job.”
It’s rare for Frank to be impressed by someone, yet his tone suggests that he most definitely is. “You can do all that?”
She stares him down silently. Then she looks at Robby. “You shocked him how many times? Twice?”
“Three times. 11 units of blood used so far.”
“This is one hell of a lucky man if I’ve ever seen one,” she notes, then looks down at her pager. “The OR will be ready in 5. Check the clamps again, I don’t want him to bleed out in the elevator. I’ll go talk to the lawyer and bring her up in the ICU. We’ve got a room for him so she can wait there.”
She turns to leave, and Langdon glances after her, then mutters, mostly to himself. “Why does everyone keep giving me weird looks today? Like I’m saying something stupid.”
“It’s because you are,” Garcia snickers before going through the doors.
Robby and Jesse check the vitals and the instruments' position, but Jack only catches bits of their conversation — because he’s watching you again: you listen carefully to Garcia’s explanation, the concern on your face dissolving slowly. But not entirely — it would be too soon for that. Garcia walks you to the elevators and out of Jack’s sight; still, his eyes stay on the spot you stood at.
He wishes that he was the one to talk to you. And he wishes he could do much more.
Jack comes back to reality when he catches movement — the gurney being wheeled out of the room.
“Wait, I can —”
“No, it’s fine, I’ll ride up with him,” Robby assures. “Your shift ended hours ago, just go get some rest, man.”
Jack needs no persuasion — he all but runs out, removes the gown and gloves, then goes to the staff’s kitchen. He’s out in five minutes but he stops at the stairs as an idea lits up in his head. Jack walks back to the lockers, unlocks his and takes out a spare clean shirt. He has to slow down then, imagining the likely steps: it takes a minute to get to the upper floor and get you to the right room; a few more minutes for you to ask more questions while the man is being prepped. The surgery will take at least 2 hours — he doesn’t want to waste a second of that time.
Jack finds you sitting in the hall, typing away at your smartphone, fidgeting slightly in your chair. And his determination is diluted with unease — should he interrupt you? Would you even want to chat? He tells himself that he can manage some small talk, that it’s not a big deal. He’s good at this.
Jack walks toward you, trying not to give away his haste. “So, do you stick your fingers into all of your clients?”
You turn to him, your face swept with confusion.
Oh no. He isn’t good at this at all.
“Fuck, sorry. I don’t why I said that, it was —”
And then you laugh. It’s quiet, more so a sound of relief, a little bit amused by him. But you aren’t irritated or displeased.
“Believe it or not, that was my first time. And hopefully, the last.”
Jack takes your calm voice as a good sign. Almost instinctively, he sits right next to you, as if the very thought of putting any distance in between you is downright absurd.
“Coffee. Figured you’d need it,” he hands you a plastic cup, and your fingers brush his when you take it.
And Jack is painfully aware that the brown-colored drink hardly tastes great. But you take sips with zero fuss.
“A caffeine IV would’ve been great, but this is the next best thing. Thank you so much,” your gaze warms up. Then it drops to the piece of clothing he is holding.
“I thought maybe you’d like to change into something that isn’t drenched in blood? I keep a clean t-shirt in case I get some fluids on me. It’s not the most fashionable choice, I know—”
You take it before he even finishes the sentence — your thumb gently brushing the folded cotton fabric, your face breaking into a grateful smile. Jack’s eyes are drawn to it, and he remembers so distinctly how your lips taste. And you look like you know he does.
“Wish I could put it on right now. But I’m counting on my blooded shirt to make me look more intimidating to the DA. Once he wakes up and deigns to text me back.”
Jack moves closer, lowering his voice like he’s protective of a secret you are about to let him in on. “What do you need the DA for?”
Your smile widens as if you find his curiosity endearing. “I need to get Bruno into witness protection. DA’s recommendation will help speed up the process.”
“Will the prosecutor back you up on this?”
“He passed out in the court at the sight of blood. He’ll back me up just fine.”
“So what’s the overall plan?” he drapes an arm across the back of your chair. You don’t mind.
“I’m Bruno’s legal representative, I can apply for the program on his behalf. They’ll also need his family to complete an application form. So once the DA gives me the green light, I have to make a beeline for the closest police station, then dash to their apartment, deal with the paperwork, and help his wife pack. Maybe she can visit him once he’s out of surgery.”
“She must be pretty shaken up,” Jack muses.
You reign your feelings well but he still catches hints of them: sadness, disappointment. Guilt. “The worst part is, she didn’t even sound surprised when I called her. Wasn’t upset with me either. She just asked, Will he pull through? And I had to make her believe that he would.”
He moves his hand up, his palm grazing your back, words sitting on the tip of his tongue: it’s not your fault, you aren’t the one to blame. You helped to save his life. But you shake off your misery, so easily like it’s a long-established habit.
“How’s your tough case, by the way? Did she wake up?”
You are deflecting, he can tell. He also has no wish to make you more upset so Jack holds back his consolations.
“She did, got her discharged a week ago. And the rehabilitation seems to be going well.”
Your grin very clearly says I told you so but you don’t say the words out loud. Instead, you place your hand above his knee — the right one, your touch not fleeting but reassuring and warm. The smile leaps out of him before he can stop it. “How’s the asshole with no brain cells?”
You let out a long-drawn sigh. “He fled the state. Which was a violation of the bail conditions. Then his attorney tried to flee, got wasted on the flight to Cincinnati — one of the CBP officers clocked him at the airport because he kept dropping his carry-on. Turns out, he snuck in a hunting knife, a whole-ass 6-inch blade. And then he got into a fight with them. Mind you, he is 5’3 and had a half-bottle of whiskey in him. I can’t even begin to comprehend that level of dumbassery. I had to visit him in jail four times before the court assigned a new lawyer to replace him. I don’t want to board another plane for at least a month.”
Jack doesn’t say anything at first, but his mouth twitches like he’s suppressing laughter. And then he can discern something unlooked-for in your face — the very evident abashment. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to vent.”
He leans to you and caresses your back. He wishes he could kiss you — on your forehead and cheeks and corners of your mouth, to smooth out every line of worry on your face. So that you don’t hesitate to open up again.
“Wasn’t a vent,” Jack argues. “I am actually very invested now. How did he manage to bring a knife on board?”
“Bribed a couple of nut heads from the PIT security,” you share gladly. “I asked him, Man, ever heard about checked baggage? Who in their right mind puts knives in a carry-on? And he told me — dead serious — that TSA is infiltrated by a gang of international smugglers, so he can’t trust them.”
“Of course you asked,” Jack notes warmly.
“I mean, he’s absolutely useless as a lawyer, at least I had something to laugh at. Besides, the Boone county jail can easily rank first in the list of the dullest places in the States.”
“So it’s the lack of brightness that’s the main problem, not that it’s packed with criminals,” Jack shakes his head in disbelief. “Worrying about you must be someone’s part-time job.”
You are startled for a moment. And then you’re beaming. “Is this you casually trying to find out if I have a boyfriend?”
“Guilty as charged,” Jack’s hand stops at your back, his gaze a cautious revelation. “But I don’t do casual.”
“Neither do I,” you tell him quietly, resting your chin on his shoulder. “And I would’ve never come to your apartment if I had anyone waiting for me at home.”
Your faces are separated by some minuscule inches. This is your second meeting — and yet, to Jack it comes as second nature: holding you close and leaning in, settling into your space as easily as you do in his, like two stars that fall into each other’s orbit. His hand is on your waist and yours moved to his shoulder; he can smell blood on you but then your scent cuts through — jasmine and bergamot and peaches, things they don’t have in hospitals, the fresh sweetness that makes him think of spring and sun. And everywhere you touch him, he feels lighter. In just a second his lips will be on yours—
Someone blows into the hall — very decisive and walking toward you, by the sound of it — but stops midway, so suddenly you hear screeching of the rubber soles against the floor. Then the footsteps retreat, and everything is quiet again, no other visitors or interferences. And yet, the moment’s gone. Jack can’t hold back a groan. You bring your fingers to his face, your thumb skating over his jaw, your body still so close to his. But your watchful eyes dart behind his back.
“The redhead keeps coming back like she’s looking for an excuse to start a conversation. What does she need a lawyer for?”
“That’s Cassie. She’s in the middle of a custody battle over her son. Her ex-husband is a douchebag with a douchebag girlfriend, so it’s messy.”
You look at Jack again. “And what’s the deal with that other doctor? Dark-haired, overly confident. Mildly annoying.”
“Frank,” he chuckles, his index finger drawing numbers on your lower back. “His marriage is in shambles, been like that for a while. But Abby loves him, and he’s not a bad dad. If it ever gets to a divorce, I don’t think she’ll take the kid away from him.”
You ruminate on this but not for long. “Can you please tell Cassie that I won’t bite her head off?”
Jack doesn’t want to move away from you so he only tilts his head back, not in disbelief but in careful wonder. “You’ll help her?”
And he can tell from your firm gaze that you aren’t doing this to please him — you want that case, you are already going through the strategies and options in your head, you grab at every chance to help people like hungry dogs grab bones. “I have about half an hour before the DA gets out of bed. Plenty of time for her to give me the details. Besides, I really enjoy going against douchebag exes.”
“Why is that?” Jack asks with a grin.
You shamelessly grin back at him. “They usually come with douchebag lawyers. It’s always fun to kick their ass in court.”
And as on cue, there are footsteps again — your face confirms it’s the same visitor, and Jack gives in: it’s for a good cause, after all, and he will get more time with you later today. His palm brushes the side of your waist, one touch replacing all the words he is afraid to say too soon: I’ve missed you, I want to spend many more days with you. He has to get up, holding back a sigh, before his feelings burst out. Jack turns around — and, unsurprisingly, Cassie is standing sheepishly at the end of the hall.
“Sorry, did I interrupt you guys?” she asks him with an awkward smile when he comes closer. “Cause it seemed like—”
“Just go talk to her,” he grumbles. When she doesn’t move, Jack softens his approach. “She’ll be happy to help you out, McKay.”
Cassie’s smile turns grateful, and then she strides across the hall to you. Jack offers you some privacy and takes the stairs to the ER. And even though exhaustion is already nipping at him, he’s in no hurry to go home, he doesn’t even feel the weight of it. He also doesn’t notice Dana’s gaze that lands on him when he comes in. He’s blithely unaware for about 15 minutes — Jack gets himself a cup of coffee, relaxes in the quiet of the empty kitchen, stretches his legs and arms.
Dana walks up to him the second he comes back to the nurse station.
“Now, will look at that. A smile on your face? I must be dreamin',” she teases, always astute in her assumptions. “It’s the hot lawyer, isn’t it?”
He’s battling a smile, indeed. “I’m not having this conversation with you.”
“Well, you see how my mouth’s moving? This means I’m talking, and you are giving me replies. Which does sound like a conversation to me,” Dana playfully bumps his shoulder. “Hey, she ticks all the boxes: smart, brave, stubborn. Did I mention that she’s hot?”
Jack doesn’t meet her gaze as his face gets warm. “Can’t argue with any of that.”
Princess peeks curiously at them from behind the monitor. Dana cackles. “Jesus, are you blushing? That’s so cute. I’m marking this day in my calendar.”
“What are we celebrating?” Perlah swings by.
“Dr. Abbot apparently got himself a date,” Princess reveals, wiggling her brows.
“With the lawyer? And she agreed?” Perlah asks in a doubtful tone.
“Frank said they were flirting in the trauma room,” Dana informs them conspiratorially, earning two hums of approval — and one groan from Jack.
“Are you aware I’m still here? Langdon has no clue what he’s talking about,” but his voice doesn’t sound angry — he’s in too good of a mood for that.
“I hear someone spreading slander behind my back,” Frank stops by.
“It’s hardly slander when you’re an asshole,” Princess glares at him. “Only a senile patient would flirt with you.”
“Is this open hostility at a workplace?” he fakes a gasp. “I don’t need anyone to flirt with me, I’m married. And if you’re talking about the lawyer, she surely seemed thrilled to leave this place.”
Both Jack and Dana look at him. She is the one who asks. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Just saw her at the parking lot. She ran out and got into a cab so fast, like someone’s chasing her. Or maybe she is chasing someone? Wouldn’t put it past her.”
“Well, no chasing needed for our cowboy,” Dana chuckles with her gaze on Abbot. “Did you choose where you’ll take her? Want me to ask around for recommendations so you can text her a couple of options?”
Jack wants someone to smack him in the head, hard. Because he surely needs to straighten up his mind. Not asking for your number the first time could be blamed on a lapse of sanity, but two times in a row? That’s what you would call a rare level of dumbassery.
As Dana sees his face fall, her own gets visibly confused — then shocked upon realization. “What, you don’t have her number?”
And everyone instantly mirrors her concern.
“You didn’t take it?”
“Why wouldn’t you?”
Jack is flabbergasted for a second. “Why is this a public discussion?!”
“Man, we were rooting for you!” Langdon throws up his hands.
“They were placing bets on how long it’d take you to get her number,” Dana snorts.
“They,” Frank mimics her. “As if you weren’t!”
Jack wearily covers his face with both palms, not in despair but with disappointment. In himself. There’s still some hope for him to cling to — they’ve got Bruno up in the OR, and you will probably come back to visit him. That was your plan, right? And what will his be if you never show up?
“What are we mourning over?” Robby nonchalantly comes by.
“My loss of 100 bucks,” Frank walks away, disgruntled.
“I only bet 15, you’re real bad at counting!” Dana shouts after him. Then she gives a joyless explanation. “No one won, though.”
Jack looks at Robby through his fingers. “Were you involved in this too?”
“Nah. I said you’d probably need a third chance.”
Abbot lowers his hands, brows furrowed in incomprehension.
“One of the ICU nurses saw you two getting all cozy with each other,” Robby keeps his voice down but still elicits a few giggles. He stares at Perlah and Princess, and they pretend to get back to work. “I figured you wouldn’t do that on day one. So there must be some history between you. And you know what they say, third time’s the charm,” he pats Jack’s shoulder reassuringly. “Do you at least know the name of her law firm?”
He is already taking lungfuls of air for a heavy sigh — because of course he didn’t ask about the firm, he is the top contender for the dumbass of the month award — but then the elevator dings. And Cassie walks into the hall, cheery as she hasn’t been in months.
Abbot gets an idea. And now he has more than a delusive hope.
“I know where I can find it out.”
McKay doesn’t take much convincing. She tells him that you gave her your assistant’s number — it’s not the answer he expected, but Jack’s grasping for straws. He makes the call with no delays, and the assistant picks up almost instantly. She’s got a thick accent that isn’t American, the vowels in her speech sound a little shorter. But her English is pretty good and so are her manners — because no one before has told Jack to fuck off so courteously. Whatever arguments he brings to get your number, she just refuses to relent: yes, sir, I understand the urgency. But you must know it’s private information, and I cannot verify your identity over the phone. Yes-yes, I’ll check the hospital website. But your photo doesn’t come with a voice recording, does it? That is unfortunate. You see, we really value our attorneys' privacy and safety. And there’s been a disturbing accident... Which I can’t talk to you about. Yes, I will let her know you called. I promise, sir. Yes, I’ll tell her that you called four times, that is an important detail, indeed.
And Jack is back to square one — still no clue where to find you, no last name and no address he can look up on Google. Bruno stays in their ICU for just one afternoon, and then Jack comes to work to learn he was transported to the other hospital — by helicopter and with a police escort that was too tight-lipped and fast to bother. Which robs Jack of the only hope he had, and he is too worn out to drown himself in work. So he takes two days off, gets eight hours of sleep, gets busy with mundane chores that make for a poor distraction.
His doorbell rings around 6 pm. He’s not expecting anyone — Robby is still at work, and a few other friends he’s got would’ve announced their visit. So Jack thinks someone must’ve gotten the wrong door, and he opens it without even looking in the peephole.
Instead of seeing some unbidden stranger, he sees you.
You’re standing at the door of his apartment. Wearing his shirt. The dark material is tucked carefully into your jeans, your hair undone. You greet Jack with a smile, a little tired and leaning on his doorframe.
“You made a lasting impression on my secretary.”
He has to take a breath and blink — once, twice — to make sure this is happening. There is a trace of a smile already on his face, he just can’t stop it. “You mean she was planning on filing a police report because she thinks I’m stalking you?”
“Actually, she liked you from the moment she figured you’re a doctor. Keeps asking if you are married or not.”
Jack puts his right hand up to show you — readily, happily, like he removed the curse that’s been tormenting him for years. “I’m not.”
And you see that he isn’t wearing the ring. He never put it back on — by now, there’s no mark left where it used to be, the white line faded with no trace. You watch his face for any hints of doubt or regret but he has none. The hint he gives you suggests the opposite: Jack steps back in a silent invitation, makes space for you to come in. To come back to.
You don’t rush in although it does look like you want to. Instead, you’ve got a suggestion of your own.
“I feel like I know more about you than you know about me. So ask me something. Anything, whatever you want to know,” your gaze is locked with his. “Before I come in.”
Because after you do, there will not be much talking. Not for the first few hours, Jack thinks. And he will gladly take ten times as long as to find out everything there is to know about you — he’ll take days, weeks, months, years. He is already sure there is nothing that can scare him away.
So what he asks about is not a deal-breaker — more so a mystery Jack can’t wrap his head around.
“How the hell are you still single?”
It’s not a hard question, and it’s the truth that you don’t shy away from — as easily as he once did, you open up to him, with honesty that he can read in your voice, eyes, face.
“I work a lot. There are always extra hours, sleepless nights, late calls from my clients who have no one else to talk to. I’m bad at taking breaks. I am... not good at asking for help. And I guess I’m used to prioritizing work because that’s what I’m left with when people leave. Not everyone will have the patience for that,” you try for your smile not to look sad but it’s the first thing that you fail at. “So I’m a handful.”
He’s quiet for barely two seconds. Then his lips curl into a grin.
“Well, I’ve got two hands. And some say that my arms look very steady,” he takes a step to you, and now instead of sadness, there’s glee — in your soft laugh and in your eyes that stay on him. “I will need one thing from you, though. Before you come in,” another step, so that he’s standing right in front of you. “I need your number.”
“Give me your phone.”
He does — you add the number to his contacts, then dial it so you can have his too. You hand his phone back, still smiling. “There you have it.”
“I plan on memorizing it,” Jack takes a quick look at the screen and then puts the device away.
He needs his hands free, he has no other words to add. He cannot tear his gaze away from you.
“Any other questions or requests?” you ask him quietly.
Jack shakes his head. And then it’s you who finally crosses the distance.
He reaches out a hand behind your back to close the door. As soon as you hear the locker click, that same hand pulls you into him. And then he kisses you — so ardently and deeply like he’s famished, like in your absence he struggled to survive. You let him take the lead — it’s your quiet surrender, it’s his most rewarding win; he savors it until you’re out of breath. Then you kick off your shoes, and Jack yanks off your t-shirt — you stop his hands and fold the piece of clothing and leave it on the first flat surface you can find — you aren’t sure if it’s a table or a shelf because he’s kissing you again, all the while you are stumbling your way through his apartment.
Jack does pause when you reach the bedroom — the city skyline stretched out behind the windows, the light already darkening from gold to copper as the evening comes. The rays cascade across the floor and walls — you are admiring the view, and he’s admiring you. It’s soft before it’s sexual: he lowers his head and drags his lips over your collarbone, then over another one. Then he moves higher — your throat, your jaw, your cheek.
“You’re staying,” he murmurs.
And even though it’s not really a question, you nod, fingers grazing the back of his neck. “Sorry for coming empty-handed. I should’ve brought some take-out.”
Jack moves one of his hands down to the button on your jeans, undoes it, two of his fingers slipping in, tracing the line of your lace panties. He didn’t get a chance to taste you last time, and now he’s twice as eager. “You brought me dessert.”
You laugh against his mouth and take his shirt off, your touches gentle but leaving goosebumps on his skin, making his heart race. He lays you down on his bed to get rid of your jeans, his voice muffled when he leaves a kiss on your hipbone.
“And breakfast is on me this time. It’s non-negotiable.”
You prop yourself up on your elbows. “You are saying there’s actual food in your fridge?”
“A terribly big amount of food. Also picked a bunch of spices from the Mexican aisle, and I have no clue how to use half of them,” his mouth comes back to yours, back to his new favorite flavors: of your lips, your smile, your moans he knows how to draw out. And you are both left breathless and desirous of more.
“So you were counting on us meeting again?” you tease.
“I was hoping for it,” Jack says truthfully. “Got pretty close to praying, actually.”
Pads of your fingers glide across his cheekbone. “You don’t strike me as a religious type.”
He doesn’t answer right away — but not out of hesitation or the lack of words. He doesn’t need many. He’s known the answer ever since he saw you in his kitchen, he’s been carrying his feelings for so long that now he’s threaded with them like the night sky with bright stars.
Jack tells you with raw candor, with a faint smile. “I’m not. But I believe you are a godsend.”
You trace the freckles under his left eye, your whisper and your gaze are filled with tenderness. “I kept thinking of an excuse to show up at your apartment.”
He lowers his face closer to yours and turns to place a soft kiss on your wrist, his hazel eyes with hints of green spilling more of his secrets: they say that he’s been looking for you everywhere. Then Jack speaks with words.
“I kept thinking I was a fucking idiot for not getting your number,” and his mouth hovers over yours before he adds, his voice hushed as if he’s still not fully convinced he has you. “I want to take you out.”
Jack looks at the specks of gold caught in your lashes and your eyes, the sunlight streaming through the glass, your bodies and his bedroom bathing in it. He feels his heart pounding.
“Am I being too old-school for aski—”
You close the gap between you, and this kiss is better than a dream: it feels like finding gravity and oxygen, like summer coming after years of winter, like now instead of hope there’s certainty, a future that is bright with possibilities. When Jack opens his eyes, he finds you smiling, and you’re brimming with it — the undeterred fondness, the warmth that says that you’ve been looking for him too.
“I’d love to go on a date with you, Jack Abbot.”
And he knows it will be just the first of many.

you’d never be able to tell but this was supposed to be porn with no plot... which I am apparently fcking incapable of. I want to write part 2 because I love them!
two gifsets that inspired this fic: x, x ♡
I have a mini-series about Jack x resident!reader that is very dear to me (I’ll make a masterlist for my Jack’s fics soon. there aren’t many but it will be easier to just add a link instead of me yapping);
SHOCKINGLY, I’m almost done with another Jack one-shot, and oh my god, I love it to pieces. reading it feels like a gut punch but in the best way possible. I can’t wait to share it ♡
dividers by @/cafekitsune, @/saradika-graphics & me.
♡ English is not my first language, so feel free to tell me if you spot any mistakes. comments and reblogs are very appreciated! let me know if you want to be tagged ♡
#the pitt#jack abbot#🍰 I was supposed to post this yesterday as my bday present to y’all but tumblr refused to show it in the tags#I’m not sure anyone will read a 17K fic on a Monday evening but I’ve been meaning to post it for 2 weeks so here we go#lauraneedstochillinsteadshewrites#jack abbot smut#jack abbot x reader#jack abbot x you#jack abbot fanfiction#jack abbot fanfic#jack abbot imagine#dr abbot x reader#dr abbot x you#shawn hatosy#jack abbott#the pitt fanfic#the pitt fanfiction#the pitt x reader#the pitt hbo#dr abbot
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please feed us some yuuji blurbs there’s a lack of him rn :(
ofc��� sweetest boy all time… here’s something was was meant to be a longer project but got lost in the editing whirlwind… love him so bad...
NEVER LOST IN TRANSLATION, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT I WANT
notes: reader is implied to be american/english-speaking, yuuta and megumi are bilingual, yuuji, bless his soul, is not. i didn’t use italics for conversations between yuuji and megumi because it would all be in japanese, but when they get mixed later in the scene, japanese is differentiated with italics. hope that’s not too confusing lololll

Honestly, Yuuji tried his best in school. Some things came easier than other, but with a bit of hard work, and help from his friends, he always managed to pull pretty good grades. But right now, his biggest regret is not taking english more seriously in high school, because it’s been about three weeks since he met you, and he’s only been able to say maybe five full sentences to you without the help of Yuuta or Megumi translating.
He was excited when Yuuta said his friend from abroad would be coming to visit and study, but god, he didn’t expect you to be so pretty. To have such pretty eyes, and pretty lips, and pretty hair, to have the prettiest voice in the world despite him only understanding every eighteenth word you say. You’re beautiful to him, and Yuuji thinks that even if he could speak your language fluently, the words would still get caught in his throat. He’s so lovesick, it’s embarrassing—his friends have been harping on him blushing and stuttering over you for the past month, and he can’t even blame them.
“What does she say to you when you guys talk,” Yuuji whines, hovering around Megumi, and not-so-discreetly looking back at you where you’re still sat in the living room laughing with Yuuta, “Does she ever say anything about me? I mean—probably not right? Which is fine! Actually, dont tell me—no, do. Or maybe—”
“She asks about you,” Megumi says, matter-of-fact in delivery, as he places a bag of popcorn in the microwave, but that doesn’t curb Yuuji’s enthusiasm. He’s practically bouncing, if he weren’t already—begging Megumi to spill the details, “What did she ask? Tell me! Tell me!”
“She once asked if you dye your hair.”
“That’s it?!” Yuuji screams, heartbroken, and visibly deflating.
Megumi shrugs, “Yuuta probably knows more. She’s his exchange buddy friend thing, so ask him.”
“I can’t ask him, he’s right next to her!” Yuuji pouts, “Wait, what does ‘exchange buddy friend thing’ mean? You don’t think they’re more than friends, right…? I can’t blame her, senpai is really pretty, too, and he can actually talk to her… so unfair.”
“You know, she’s not fluent, but she can understand some Japanese,” Megumi reminds him, “So, she can definitely hear you, and probably understand you.”
Yuuji’s shoulders slump, and once again, he turns around to look back at you. This time, you two make eye-contact, and that instant, Yuuji’s cheeks go pink, a nervous hand raised to wave at you, and instant internal regret at his actions; but, then you smile, and wave back, and Yuuji stays like that, dumbfounded and lovestruck and on autopilot as he waves with hearts in his eyes until Yuuta looks up from his phone and catches him.
Embarrassing. He knows he’s not the brightest, but he’s at a record high of self-embarrassment since he’s met you.
Yuuta finds himself chuckling when Yuuji spins around and goes back to prodding Megumi with questions. When you turn to face him again, it’s with a shy smile.
“I told you you’d like him,” Yuuta grins—the kind that seems sweet and innocent, but has just a kiss of that all-knowing tease to it; the kind that reminds you that he’s truly related to Satoru.
“Oh, be quiet,” you grumble, tucking your legs in and resting your chin on your knee. You spare another glance in Yuuji’s direction, for once, grateful for the language barrier between the two of you, when you turn back to Yuuta to proclaim: “I can like someone and not do anything about it. You’re real good at that, aren’t you?”
Yuuta’s slightly cocky grin falls into a scowl, and now you get to smile when he argues back, “We said not to bring up he who shall not be named in the presence of my friends!”
“Then don’t bring up my he who shall not be named in the presence of him!”
“Aren’t Americans all about forging new frontiers and chasing after your dreams?” he taunts, “Well, your dream is right in front of you.”
“My dream right now is to kill you.”
“Lucky for me, you’re going to have to hold off on that because your lover boy is approaching.”
You don’t have time to argue back with Yuuta when Megumi and Yuuji approach the living area with snacks in tow. Yuuta scoots to the tail end of the couch under the guise of giving Yuuji space to place the popcorn and nuggets in the center of the coffee table, but he has just enough time to flash you a wink before Yuuji settles in between. Megumi opts for the loveseat closets to Yuuta’s end of the couch, and you do your best not to reach over Yuuji and strangle Yuuta.
The boys decide on watching a movie you’ve never heard of, but Megumi reassures you it’ll be easy to follow and has English subtitles. You don’t mind, settling in to your corner of the couch with a handful of popcorn just as the title-screen for Human Earthworm 3 rolls across the TV.
You can follow along well-enough—even without subtitles, you get the gist of the movie. What you really find entertaining is Yuuji, who occasionally blurts out a comment or exclamation, or audibly coos whenever something sad is happening on screen. He’s almost as animated as the characters; you’re more of the silent-watcher type, but you find yourself endearing by this commentary, even if you can only understand parts of it.
You particularly appreciate the way that after every comment, he either motions to Megumi, or turns to you himself to repeat his thoughts in his best broken English, and even when you don’t understand his words, you understand him. His emotions are all on his sleeve: frustration, happiness, confusion, curiosity—communication between you two should be more difficult, but Yuuji makes it easy.
It gives you the confidence you cough out your own observation, “You, um… you’ve… seen the others? You seem to like this series.”
Across the room, Megumi and Yuuta hold their breaths, opting to not translate for you when you switch from Japanese to English. Yuuji is quiet for a moment, turned to face you with a slightly confused look on his face that makes you nervous, until his eyes brighten up and he smiles and begins nodding fervently—“Yeah—yeah, I do! It’s my… hm how do I say it… Oh! It’s my favorite!”
Between the smile on his face, the blush on his cheeks, and sincerity in his voice, you feel like you’re wrapped up in his world. It’s a little confusing, and scary, but it’s not all that bad. Maybe you can do something about it, eventually.
“I.. I think I like it, too.”
#anonymous#i love love through different languages...... love is the ultimate language or whatever satoru gojo said#this au was supposed to be a whole thing#but the toggle between differentiating japanese and english makes it hard ://#the only way i can think of that isnt a complete visual nightmare is with italics but even then... i hardly like using italics to begin wit#sigh... oh he's cute#also there's a WHOLE exchange student yuuta au in my head where hes the love interest#one of those easily 60k aus that would be beautiful but idek how to begin writing it#anyways yuuji cutest boy#yuuji x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#yuuji itadori x reader#yuji x reader#anyways i have more yuuji smut blurbs to finish but alas i must study 😔#yuuji.ask
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tbh I have a soft spot for cacw-level Ultra Thicc Bucky and how he kinda just dwarfs Steve in size (despite Steve also being built obvs), and how tiny Steve could feel when this Bucky holds him.
How he'd love being engulfed by those thick powerful arms, snuggling up to Bucky's massive chest, head tucked under Bucky's chin, his face pressed right up against that tendon-thick neck while Bucky runs his big broad hand up and down Steve's spine and rumbles sweet nothings in Steve's ear, calling him doll, calling him sweet, the sweetest thing he's ever seen, the prettiest, so pretty he'd make angels weep, and how did Bucky ever get so lucky, huh?, what'd he do to deserve this sugar-sweet treat dropped into his lap like a fucking dream?, and Steve flushing up to the red-hot tips of his ears and burrowing deeper into that glorious wall of muscle and chest hair, with a half-hearted groan of oh my god and stop that right now (but the truth is, he doesn't want Bucky to stop ever, and Bucky knows that too).
On the other hand, there's something about this Bucky, this big hunky unit of a guy, all hard packed muscle and carefully controlled power, who could snap a man in two like a twig if the fancy took him, being so easily lifted and carried and (should he want it) even manhandled by Steve - because Steve may be slimmer in build but he's strong, strong enough to pull a damn helicopter out of the sky - that just makes my brain tingle in the most delightful way.
Just thinking of this wonderfully big luxuriant mountain of a man, being scooped up in Steve's arms like he weighs nothing, his sturdy legs wrapped around Steve's waist, Steve's hands braced under his thighs and so gloriously full of him - and just, being carried around their home so his feet won't have to bother touching the floor, for no other reason than because Steve loves to treat him like a king, like he's Steve's own dainty-toed princess to be pampered and revered.
I just, you know, really really love the idea of this deliciously huge boi getting to feel precious, and cherished, and smol, and completely and wholly adored, swallowed up in Steve's loving embrace like he's just a tiny slip of a thing, no matter his actual size.
Like I'm maybe sliiiightly obsessed with the concept of this Bucky, who looks so tough at first glance, who's built like he bench-presses 16-wheeler trucks when he's bored, feeling so sweet, feelin pretty, desired, dammit just feeling so incandescently fucking gorgeous when Steve looks at him like that, heated and adoring at once. When Steve lets his gaze trail all over him, from the glossy spill of Bucky's hair on the pillow, to Bucky's parted lips, to the generous expanse of his chest and the dusky halos of his nipples, to the rich, dark trail starting just below his navel, and the meat of his tree trunk-thick thighs that Steve dreams of burying his face between day and night, right down to the tip of Bucky's toes.
Drinking him in like he could just eat Bucky up, swallow him whole, taste him and savour him all night long with the sheer stamina of his superpowered body, and still want more of him when the sun rises over the horizon - and all Bucky would have to do is just lie back and let himself be worshipped and consumed by the ever-famished love that lives in Steve's heart.
I just- I like every possible dynamic when it comes to these two okay alshfgsjgk
#stucky#stevebucky#i think my brain's just looking for an excuse to write some smut even though i'm supposed to be studying xvdjgdjgdkhd#hepl#rillers has feels
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cw: orgasm denial, some soft degredation (he calls reader a slut, but fairly lovingly), overstimulation. wc: 1.4k
minors dni or you get blocked.
cowboy!nanami gives the best massages. years of working on the farm have made his hands strong and firm, and really just overall perfect for soothing the knots in your back.
it's so intimate, the way his thumbs press between your shoulders, eliciting a soft, sleepy sigh from your lips.
he can't stand seeing you hunched over the desk in your office, working yourself tirelessly even though you'd left your real office hours ago. he was sure that your posture was likely the same even when you were at work.
sure, he can chide you about sitting up straight and it being good for you, but he can also solve the problem as it is. after a long day from both of you, him on the farm and you at work, it's relaxing for both of you for him to gently rub the knots from your tired back.
"right there, ken," you sigh, a smile lingering on your lips despite the pressure kento is putting into your spine.
"y'gotta start sittin up, pretty. can't have knots like this forming. it's not good for ya," he says, pausing his massage to press a kiss to your spine. his way of sealing the newly-relaxed muscles.
"i know, i know, kento," you reply. "but why would i do that when you treat me so nicely when i don't?"
he lets out a chuckle, returning to your lower back, his lips still ghosting over the back of your neck.
"y'think i wouldn't treat ya like this no matter what? i'd do this for ya even if ya didn't need it, darlin'. just like makin' ya feel good."
you let a moan slip from your lips this time, both from his hands and his words. of course this felt great, but you couldn't help but press your thighs together at the though of nanami making you feel good in other ways.
naturally, kento is quick to pick up on the change in atmosphere. he can see the way you press your legs together and how the pretty sighs and moans leaving your lips have become less subdued.
his hands slide along your waist, "ya want somethin' from me, princess?"
"maybe..." you tease, resting your head back against his chest.
a warm smile breaks on his face, and it reminds you of the sunrise that he's made sure to show you plenty of times.
"gonna have to use yer words then, pretty girl," he replies.
you sigh, "you know what i want, ken. don't tease."
"i do, darlin', but i gotta hear you say it. y'wanna be good for me, don't ya?"
his hands travel down your body, rubbing over your tummy and dancing over the waistband of your shorts. you know he knows exactly what you want and how to give it to you, but you were happy to indulge him, because you really did just want to be good for him.
"please, kento, need you to make me cum."
he grabs your chin, gently turning you so he can press a kiss to your lips.
"now that wasn't so hard, now, was it, princess?" he asks, voice rumbling through his chest. "now spread those pretty legs for me.
you comply at an almost embarrassing speed, so desperate from him from the hours of pent up passion lingering from his massage.
his fingers snake down into your shorts, easily finding your clit and rubbing it gently over your panties, lips glued to the side of your neck.
you let a blissed-out moan escape your lips as he continues playing with you; his touches may be teasing, but they were doing it for you. kento always did, always made sure you felt so good for him.
"such a good girl, aren't ya? just needed me to play with your little pussy, hm? maybe you're not my good girl, maybe you're just a slut," he grins devilishly against your neck.
"hngh, no, i'm your good girl. i'm yours," you reply, desperately rutting your hips up into his hand, chasing just a little bit more friction than he's giving you.
he pinches your clit, "doesn't seem like it, with the way yer humpin' my hand. seems to me like you're being a whore. gotta teach you how to behave, darlin'."
one of his hands holds your hips still while the other picks up its pace, rubbing your clit in earnest now, truly trying to work you to your orgasm.
or so you thought.
you feel the coil in your tummy tense and tighten until it's just about ready to snap, when kento pulls his hand away from you just as you're about to go over the edge.
you let out a defeated cry, "no! no, kento, i was so close, was about to cum!"
he scoffs, flipping you onto your back like you were nothing but a sack of flour.
"you'll take what i give you, sweetness. just lay back and let me make you feel good. that's what you wanted after all, isn't it? y'don't think i can make ya cum?"
"pleease," is all you can manage to get out as kento pulls his own pants down just enough to release his aching cock from its confines.
"you'll cum when i tell ya to, darlin'. that's what ya get for actin' like a desperate little slut," he spits out as he rubs himself through your slick folds a few times, making sure he's plenty slicked up. "don't know why ya gotta act up, darlin'. ya know i'll always make ya cum. just gotta lay back and stop worryin' your pretty little head. y'know i'll take care of ya."
you nod your head frantically, doing everything in your power to get kento to stop being so cruel and just fuck you already. you wanted to grab him and force his lips to yours, giving him no other choice than to get lost in you, but you know that would only garner you more punishment.
eventually, finally he pushes himself into you, drawing loud moans from both of you.
"fuck, darlin', never get any less tight for me. such a perfect pussy, isn't that right? perfect pussy that's all for me. luckiest man in the world, gettin' her all to myself."
you moan at his obscenities---it wasn't often kento talked dirty to you like this, and it made your head spin as he picked up his pace, rutting his hips against yours mercilessly.
you throw your head back against the pillows as he rips every moan and cry out of you. tears spill down your cheeks at some point, partly from how good he was making you feel, partly from the pent-up need from him denying you once already.
"please, please, kento," you cry. "need to cum so bad, please let me, please!"
"fuck, 'm close too, sweetheart," he groans into your lips. "go on, cum for me, fuckin' milk me, baby."
his command is all it takes to finally get that cord to snap, making your vision go white as you convulse with the overwhelming pleasure taking over your body.
kento fucks you through your orgasm, still desperately chasing his own. once you're done shaking, he brings a hand back to your clit, making you cry from the overstimulation.
"no, ken, 's too much! oh fuck, gonna-"
you're cut off by kento's loud groan as he releases inside you, filling you to the absolute brim, rubbing your clit in quick circles as his soul leaves his body.
"please, please cum again for me, baby, need ya," he manages to get out before his wish becomes a reality and you're thrown head first into another bone-shaking orgasm.
you can hardly feel your fingers or toes when you finally come back down. kento pulls out of you with a hiss before laying down next to you, pulling you in against his chest.
you rest your head against his still-heaving chest, listening to his heartbeat as it jumps. you're utterly exhausted and wrecked, but equally blissed-out and floating on cloud 9 with your fiance, who looks at you like you hung the stars in his image.
"love ya so much, sweet pea. sorry if i got a little carried away there," he murmurs, voice much softer now than it had been only moments ago.
you stretch your neck to give him a quick peck against his lips, "no, that was fucking great, ken'. should do that more often."
he raises a brow, hands running lazily along the curve of your wasit, "oh? ya like bein' called a slut?"
you giggle, "if it's you? yes please."
now it's his turn to laugh as he pulls you in a bit closer.
"well, ya know i love ya. i don't actually think any of that, but ya just looked so pretty all desperate for me."
your face heats and you bat your hand against his chest, "love you too, handsome."
cowboy!kento masterlist
#jjk#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk nanami kento#jjk nanami x reader#jjk x reader smut#jjk smut#nanami kento#nanami x reader#nanami kento x reader#nanami smut#cowboy!kento🤍#this wasn’t even supposed to be smut when i started writing it oh well#just in love w him need him bad
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Rumor has it that Rae has her eyes on a reserve course student... Are they... taking a study break together?
Rae is hanging out with a reserve course student? ...What's so special about him..? Sounds like she's wasting her time...
[Study Date NO TABLE VER.] TWITTER/POIPIKU FOLLOWERS ONLY
HAHA I've been getting a lot of requests to draw hajime >w> but I haven't gotten any specific prompts yet so hERE IT ISSSSS
its is totally based on another audio i listened to >w>;; something about muffled moans really get my gears going hehe
#saedraws#danganronpa#danganronpa fanart#posting from twt#super danganronpa 2#sdr2#danganronpa smut#self insert#oc x canon#hajime x reader#hajime smut#hajime hinata#danganronpa hajime#danganronpa hajime smut#hajime hinata x reader#hajime hinata fanart#danganronpa 2#danganronpa sdr2#danganronpa goodbye despair#Rae#GOD I CANT BELIEVE I LEAKED RAE'S FULL NAME ON HERE#ITS IMPORTANT TO RAE LORE BUT HOW???#AND NAGITO ISN'T EVEN IN IT AAAAAAAAUGHHH#this was supposed to be a warm up too#but suddenly it became panels??? crazy
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so what you’re saying is that lucien spent the night at the manor. probably with tamlin. is that what we’re saying. is this what’s happening. because i think that’s what happening.
i was checking some details for my recent fic and acofas fr the craziest book ever bc sorry let me get this straight: lucien visits tamlin for solstice (per invitation), he stays the night, wakes up the next morning before tamlin to hunt them food so they could eat, when he comes back tamlin essentially kicks him out and not long after he packs up his stuff and dumps it at his doorstep.
what is this.
#how did i miss this detail before omg???#staying the night ??? waking up to hunt them food whilst tamlin’s sleeping??#the implications speak for themselves what am i even supposed to say#sad christmas smut is just calling out to me rn#someone end their misery fr look at them#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#lucien vanserra#pro tamlin#tamcien#acofas
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— l.rw thought [s]
🪼 - i am very much still here.... riwoo get out my head (and get in my bed)
pairing: riwoo x reader ・genre: smut, established relationship ・MDNI!!!!!
wc: 874・warnings: making out/kissing, fingering
[ network: @onedoornet ]
thinking abt getting all dressed up and going to an event together. as soon as you meet him at your door when he picks you up, he knows he's done for. you look absolutely to die for, he swears he starts salivating. you see his eyes scan over you figure and back up to your face like three times before he actually says something. he gets all nervous, making you giggle because now he's clearing his throat and tripping over his words. you tell him he looks good too but the tone in your voice makes him shiver.
the whole event y'all are connected at the hip, where he goes you go and vice versa. that part isn't uncommon for you two though. any time you're at an event together, you stick like glue. what is out of the ordinary is how touchy riwoo has been the whole night. he usually likes to keep a hand on you whether it's around your waist or resting on the small of your back. but tonight feels different, his touches more purposeful and lingering. an arm wrapped firmly around your hips, fingers splayed over your thigh when you're sat next to each other, hand grazing down your spine every so often. you don't know if he's actually trying to get you riled up or not but it's working and by the end of the night you're more than hot and bothered.
when you two finally say all your goodbyes, it takes every ounce of your self control to not drag him out the venue. and it takes you even more self control to not tell the driver to pull over when you two on on your way back home. riwoo doesn't make it any easier on you either, his dainty hands rubbing your thigh and his fingers drawing patterns that leave goosebumps. you think you're practically vibrating with need by the time you get to the hotel. and you're almost positive riwoo can tell by now, every time he tries to start a conversation you seem barely focused on the words coming out his mouth and more on the way his lips are moving and how pretty they look and how good they'd feel on- you look away before you jump across the seat. he smirks to himself, picking up on all your cues. he feels a little smug knowing you're just as affected because truthfully he's been thinking about getting you out your clothes pretty much the entire time.
you two are silent on your way through the very pristine lobby of the hotel, only the sounds of your shoes on the tile and the low murmurs of the late night staff who pay you no mind. none of that really matters to you though when riwoo laces his fingers through yours and all but drags you to the elevators. as soon as the doors close, you scan around and hope to not spot a camera. unfortunately you do but you don't let it deter you as you step closer into your pretty boyfriends space. he looks slightly panicked as you corner him and he whispers about the cameras. you just shrug as a tiny smirk plays on your lips. he sucks in a sharp breath when you're pressed chest to chest and his hands are immediately grabbing at your hips. when you press your mouth to his, he almost moans fully sinking into the kiss. it's heated and rushed as your arms wrap around his shoulders and you pull him in closer. your whimper into his mouth and he feels hot all over. your hands tangle into his hair and his caress your sides.
when the elevator dings, you both pull away hastily and try to fix yourselves. luckily there's no one there when the doors open and you two practically sprint to your room, him fumbling slightly with the keycard while your hands find purchase on his waist. as soon as you've successfully shut the door, you're back on each other. he's murmuring about how beautiful you are between kisses and you just hum at his words, more concerned currently with getting his suit jacket off. he chuckles breathily at your impatience before taking it off, throwing it somewhere in the room. your hands are grabbing at his waist again, pushing him back towards the bed. he stumbles back, collapsing onto the sheets and letting out a little noise of shock when you're immediately climbing over him. you start kissing down his neck, undoing his buttons while he starts to take off his tie. you pull away to catch your breath and start to undress yourself as he watches, swollen lips slightly parted. once you've both rid yourself of your clothes, you run your hands over his smooth skin. you tell him how pretty he is and watch a blush spread over his neck. his hands start to roam from your hips to your chest, fondling your tits and causing you to sigh into his touch. when you start to grind yourself on top of him, he lets out a breathy moan. soon enough, you're completely naked and riding him within an inch of his life while his fingers work wonders over your clit.
#this wasnt even supposed to be a thought.....#anyways no one ask me to make this into a fic bc i'll do it#*written by 🪼#*🌑.lrw#riwoo x reader#riwoo smut#riwoo suggestive#boynextdoor smut#bnd smut
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I indeed have something to say 🫵
because imagine he starts kissing you, his lips are probably very delicate, a bit sweet from one too many glasses of sangria and moving in a beautifully slow rhythm with yours.
you got back from a party or something, you’re both a bit tipsy and incredibly turned on, and you don’t even think twice before making your way down to the floor as soon as you get home
Not without playing with him a bit tho, it starts with your hands in his hair, tugging while you’re biting on his bottom lip, then you slide them down his neck, scratching your way down to his shoulders and stopping on his chest. His hair is shorter here because he shaves it for racing, but it got a bit of time to grow back so you slowly and tenderly caress him
it’s almost painful to him that you’re taking your time, but how can he protest when one of your hands is now laying down his belly button and playing with the waistband of his boxers ?
And now that your hand has reached its final destination, you’re doing it all over again with your mouth, kissing, licking, occasionally biting.
he’s a whining mess at this point. he’s usually all dom and in control, but right now? He’s is trance. his mind is clouded by the alcohol, and the sight of you on your knees, your tongue dancing down his happy trail while your hands tug his boxers down and your gaze stays locked on his… he’s definitely done for 😔
-🐱
BYE IM DEAD, IM DONE OH MY GOD I CANT EVEN-
#bon answers#🐱 anon#give it up to 🐱 anon for always knowing how to shut my brain off#what the hell man i cant even im just like my brain cant even like UGH I CANT FORM SENTENCES#carlos sainz smut#carlos sainz x reader smut#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz x female reader#carlos sainz x female reader smut#f1 smut#f1 x reader smut#f1 x reader fic smut#f1 x female reader#f1 x female reader smut#HEY SO WTF AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW HUH?
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╰┈➤ 18+ none of these stories belong to me! this is a masterlist of all the fanfics i’ve read and reblogged! just thought it would be nice to have them all in one spot! (if your fic is on here and you wish not to be, please let me know!) some will have summaries if provided <3
ᡣ𐭩 how you can help palestine . fic recs m.list
@runa-falls
⭒ Cocktails
you finally gain enough courage to make a move on your best friend
⭒ Secret Third
⭒ Did You Just Kiss Me?
@softlyspector
⭒ Disaster
Marc's mental health takes a turn for the worse when you give him some news. After chasing him to Chicago, you, Steven, and Jake are left to pick up the pieces.
⭒ making out with Steven. that is all
⭒ surprising them with affection they aren't used to
⭒ why won't you let me take care of you?
@soonknight
⭒ Jake Lockley (fucking you against the bathroom counter)
He's anything but gentle, but you wouldn't have him any other way.
⭒ Deserve
Marc never stays with you after he fucks you. You are better left in the hands of Steven. This time, he doesn't leave you.
⭒ "I thought we agreed to share her?"
@ichorai
⭒ dlz
jake lockley wasn't your husband. steven and marc were. jake was just... he was just there. a ghost living in your house.
⭒ Stork Owl
you often walked around with a storm cloud hanging over your head. good thing steven always carried an umbrella.
⭒ Love Dog
your neighbor was delusional. he cried a lot, spoke of nonsensical happenings, and always appeared somewhat lost. you found yourself to be rather fond of him.
⭒ I Was Just A Kid
khonshu wanted you dead. marc just wanted you.
@writefightandflightclub
⭒ A Lasting Impression
Steven falls asleep on you. No… I mean literally on you.
⭒ Just Right
Marc joined the Marines thinking he might finally belong somewhere. Turned out, he belonged next to you.
@eyelessfaces
⭒ Drenched Flowers
you and marc had a serious fight and have been avoiding each other since. the tension is hard to handle for everyone, and your only wish is to make things right again between you and marc, only he strictly refuses to front.
⭒ Tired and Wounded
marc comes home bleeding and refuses to talk about it, you beg him to let you take care of his injuries.
@psithurista
⭒ Stuck
You stop by Steven's place one night after work. Somebody else answers his door.
@redeyerhaenyra
⭒ Sleeping Beauty
After having sex with Jake, you both fall asleep in your flat. Only, it's not Jake that wakes up, it's Steven.
@mcondance
⭒ giving Steven head
@sinsofsummers
⭒ Insatiable
you can never get enough of marc. and marc? he's not complaining.
@fettuccin-e
⭒ Its Never Easy
⭒ Man in the Mirror
Steven knows it’s wrong, God, it’s fucking wrong, but it’s like he can’t stop himself.
⭒ Gold-Skinned and Eager
⭒ A Soft Ray of Sunlight
@sarahghetti
⭒ Blood On Your Mind
after an argument with marc, you go missing. he tears himself apart trying to find you.
⭒ All the Echoes in My Mind
marc falls victim to his own self-doubt. you get caught in the crossfire.
@bits-and-babs
⭒ Chocolate
After weeks of pining for your coworker Steven Grant, sharing chocolate over a late shift causes sparks to fly.
@bruhstories
⭒ Canopic Jar
marc is exasperated by you, but he needs to behave because you're steven's girlfriend.
@spctrsgf
⭒ Cake
@peterman-spideyparker
⭒ Domestic Adonis
Steven gets some new reading glasses that make your heart skip a beat and make you think of something. One night in bed as the two of you read, you voice this opinion to him. When you get back from a work trip one week later, boy are you in for a treat.
@stormkobra-5
⭒ Hold Me Close
Having been against touch all your life, now that you have three loving boyfriends, you’re overwhelmingly clingy. Cuddles, hand-holding, standing so close you’re up against them; but sometimes that’s just not close enough.
⭒ Puzzles
Steven’s not rough with you, like Marc or Jake. He’s more… Reserved. But he will wreck your shit if you ask nicely.
@luvpedropascal
⭒ First Time
#marc spector#he lived. he served cunt. he died.got resurrected. served even more cunt.#marc spector x reader#steven grant#steven grant x reader#idc if mr knight is a loser hes my loser#jake lockley#jake lockely x reader#yes hes my comfort character and yes he does beat the shit out of ppl#he multitasks idk#marc spector angst#marc spector fluff#marc spector smut#jake lockley smut#jake lockley fluff#jake lockley angst#and how am i supposed to pay attention to any of the things that are happening when oscar isaac is wearing tight jeans
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I'm in chainmail, baby I'm impressed
Squeaking in under the wire for @stevieweek day 4: Special Outfit with bonus prompts: lingerie and DnD/Fantasy. Plus I'm counting this as my @steddie-week Day Seven Free Space
Stevie Harrington/Eddie Munson WC: 3217 | M | No Archive Warnings Apply | Tags/Themes: Transfem!Steve Harrington; Transmasc!Eddie Munson; Fade to Black
AO3
It starts with a blouse.
No, that’s not right. It actually started when Stevie asked how earring a suit of armor didn’t chafe, and if a pair of keys could stab through a beer can how were arrows not sending stabby metal pieces into people.
Which actually probably means it really started with layers. Like the extra layer of leather, done up to Eddie’s chin when he called her back. “Make ‘em pay” wasn’t the send off she’d expected after the big boy and other flirting. Flirting that had made her stomach twist and her heart flutter and her brain flinch with the close but not quite of it. But maybe that’s why she’d sent her own return volley. Why she’d grabbed hold of that half done zipper and left Eddie with a pat to the chest and a promise to do just that.
She totally saved his life with that move. Her, the leather jacket, and some extra breast tissue Eddie wasn’t really using, all working together to keep razor sharp fangs from tearing flesh and puncturing any important organs.
That breast tissue maybe saved her too, when she learned just what having it made Eddie and what it meant about options she hadn’t known were there. They had a lot of time to talk in their shared bat bite isolation chamber.
Talk about layers that go under chain and metal to protect knights of the realm and their devoted squires that help them.
That started in the Upside Down, finished in the hospital. And this started in the thrift store.
The blouse was white. Pure white, basically neon, white as the virgin snow. Totally not Stevie’s color, the fresh wedding white brings out the undertones in her skin in a way that leaves her looking sallow and liver failure-y. But something about the sleeve catches her eye. The way it balloons before gathering at the wrist.
It’s a 70’s throwback for sure. Reminds her of the cover from the album Eddie brought over a few weeks ago, Little Queen. Robin has her face screwed up before Stevie even has it all the way off the rack. Hating it but trying to be supportive the way she has been throughout all of Stevie’s transition from Steve to who she is now.
“That is… wow!”
“It’s super ugly, and not even in a cool way.”
Robin slumps against the rack, sending a hanger cascading to the floor. She scrambles down to pick it up but Stevie doesn't miss her, “Oh thank god.”
“The best thing to happen to you was my sense of style not changing.”
“I know. You’d look good in anything, but my wardrobe offerings would have shrunk.” Seeming to remember the source of the freak out. She snaggs the shirt. “So what’s with this thing? I think even you’d struggle to make this look good.”
She takes it back from Robin’s disapproving grip. Holds it up to herself just to see the way Robin’s face contorts. The neckline is going to do nothing for her, not low cut enough to show off the way her boobs are coming in. The poof in the arms will accent her shoulders . And it’s so, so white.
“It made me think of Eddie,” she says, fingering the loose tie that’s hanging down the front of the blouse.
“It is very vampire lord,” Robin admits. “Might even make him look tan.”
Layers, knights would wear padded shirts under their armor and under those drapey shirts in cotton and linen. He’d been excited when he’d talked about it. Passionate. The way he got when he talked about Lord of the Rings or DnD. She holds the shirt even tighter against her, turns this way and that even though she can only kind of make out her reflection in the mirror at the end of the row. It’s an ugly shirt. But it makes her think of knights and Éowyn and paladins and Eddie.
Eddie flushed pink and beautiful, squirming in his seat in a different way than he usually does, talking about devotion and pledges. Duty and honor.
“I’m gonna buy it.”
“For Eddie?” Robin asks on a sigh. She already knows the answer.
“He’ll certainly get to enjoy it.”
The problem with being the one to come up with a plan is she has to be the one to follow through with it.
Part of her knows the blouse would be enough. She could dress it up just right, flirt a little, and have Eddie eating out of the palm of her hand.
But the part of her that had a flair for the dramatic that rivaled her boyfriend’s wasn’t going to let her skimp unless she took every possible step to fully achieve her vision.
So she goes to the only person she knows who might be able to put the final and most crucial piece of the scene together.
Flopped across the Henderson couch, she’s making herself comfortable for her and Caludia’s date with Dallas. She’s too cozy to get up, decides it's easier to flop her head over the arm of the sofa to shout at Dustin while he rummages through the kitchen.
“So if I was trying to get my hands on some of that chain link armor stuff, would you know a drama club nerd who might have some?”
“Yeah, I have some.”
“You have some?” she can feel her eyebrows raised up into the middle of her forehead. She went to him for a reason, but surely she would have known if he was capable of affording something like that. Was that why she was footing the bill at the arcade every week, so he could have suit of armor money?
“Well it's not like it grew in the backyard, I made some.”
“Made some?” she flips around on the couch, this has become the kind of conversation she has to look at her brother and have him be rightside up.
He’s got his hand on his hip which isn't as commanding when he’s also holding a glass of milk in the other. It’s cute though, like he’s trying to channel her.
“What are you an echo? It's not like it was hard. You need some wire and pliers and patience.”
“And you?”
“Har har. Yes. Do you want to borrow it or not.” The threat is there even if she doesn’t think it’s that sincere. It’s fucking armor she doubts he could hide it that well if she wanted to just come in and take it.
But she makes nice anyway cause she’s a good sister. “Yes! Sorry.”
“Ma's got all that jewelry making stuff and you know I like to work with my hands when I'm talking with Suzie.”
“Disgusting.”
It was a joke. But it’s a joke that sends his drink sloshing over the sides of his glass as he startles. A good friend, even if she doubts he’ll ever acknowledge it, she stifles her laugh in the palm of her hand as he turns a shade of red that is medically concerning.
“Ew, don't be crass, Stevie,” he stutters out.
“Is this even going to fit me,” she takes pity on him, dragging the topic back to her, “you made it for yourself half-pint.” The insult barely works, a summer growth spurt has left sophomore Dustin towering over her shoulder. Well, not towering, but he can see over her shoulder now.
“I made it for Mike, actually, so he could be his paladin at that convention in September. But he wouldn't let me measure him cause I ‘know what he looks like’ and it came out too big.”
“Oh so it'll be perfect for me.” She tries to make it a joke, but hearing that it was made for human stringbean Michael Wheeler has her nervous in the place where all of her ugliest body issues live. At least if Dustin had made it for himself it would have just looked like a crop top.
“Well, it still might not fit because of your,” he gestures vaguely at her front.
“Boobs, Henderson, they're boobs. You can call them-”
“Alright!” He shrieks, “I was trying to be respectful.”
“When have you ever been respectful? And don't say it's because I'm a girl, I'll push you into Lover’s Lake.”
“I wouldn't talk about El’s or Max’s is all I'm saying.” He says into the glass in his hand.
“But I can borrow it?”
“If it fits over your boobs,” he says the word like it's in a foreign language he's neither spoken nor heard, “you can keep it. I know it's for some weird sex thing with Eddie and I don't want it in my closet knowing what it's seen.”
Honestly it's for the best, because if this goes the way she thinks it's going to she really doesn't want to have to figure out how to get stains out of aluminum. But it's hard to resist the siren song of torturing Dustin. “I can't believe you're calling my sex life weird, are you saying there's something wrong with us? That we aren't a normal couple like everyone else? I thought you were a friend.”
“Nothing about Eddie is normal and he'd be offended you tried to suggest he was so I'd feel bad.”
“Yeah, good point loser.” She snuggles back down into the couch, she never really gives the episodes of Beauty and the Beast that much attention but this one should be wrapping up soon. “If it doesn't fit over my tits and it sees zero action do you want it back then?”
“After this conversation, I'm not sure I ever want to see you again. So just keep it. I'm sure Eddie will find some kind of use for it.”
There’s another quip at the tip of her tongue that she knows will send Dustin into fits, whether they would have been of rage or denial she’ll never know. The front door is slamming open bringing with it Claudia at the end of her swing shift.
“Stevie, dear,” she always bustles into the house like she’s carrying an armload of groceries even when it’s just her coming home in her uniform, “never go into nursing. Doctors are some of the dumbest fuckers on the face of the planet.”
It occurs to her, the attitude might be a family trait. Maybe that’s why they adopted her so easily. If only she could pull off the tiny hat the way Claudia can.
All of the pieces of her plan stay hidden for weeks. Folded up carefully in an oversized hatbox in the back of her Mom’s extended closet. The hat, a monstrosity purchased for a Derby she doesn’t think they’d even gone to left to gather dust or whatever it is hatboxes are meant to prevent.
The chainmail had fit. The weight of it as surprising as the cool feeling of it against her fingers.
She has the clothes, the accessories, even bought something silky and golden yellow to go underneath. Like the armor wasn’t going to be sexy enough for Eddie. Lingerie under lingerie like a hat on a hat, but she has to feel sexy or else she’s going to feel like a complete idiot.
She kind of already feels like an idiot. Something in the knowing that the top and the chain and the yellow bra with the flowers embroidered on it are all upstairs makes her anxious in a way she hasn’t ever been with Eddie before.
Hands haven’t been wandering during their movie nights. She keeps her feet kicked back behind her, crossed at the ankle, when they’re sharing a booth at dinner. There’s always a fifteen-going-on-sixteen year old chaperone in the car with them, sometimes even in the front seat as she pretends she’s just making sure they’re getting pre-prepared for their upcoming drivers tests.
And sitting next to him on the sofa, a whole cushion between them for the first time since ever, she watches the careful way he makes each line as he sketches and cross hatches what she can just make out to be a flowing haired knight. Her resolve breaks.
Stevie craves him the way she used to want ice cream on a hot day. The taste and feel of it an almost physical feeling, she would want it so bad. That’s what horny feels like now, she’s slowly realizing.
Before she can overthink it too much more, “I wanna try something.”
Normally she thinks of Eddie as having a kind of feline grace, he slinks and when he does fall off of something he isn’t supposed to be on he grins like it was always the plan to reacquaint himself violently with the floor. But the hint of suggestion in her voice has him perked up on the couch like a dog that just heard his leash come off the hook.
It's embarrassing how badly she wants him.
“What were you thinking, baby?”
He’s better at this than she is, at the lead up. The introduction. It’s a different skill to slowly introduce the concept of the strange, a change. Different than foreplay. She feels like she’s propositioning her proposition. The thing about slow, missionary in a room with the lights dimmed, no bandaids need to be ripped off before.
“You’ve roleplayed.”
“Not the kind I think you’re suggesting.” He’s impossibly more perked. Notebook and pencil still and poised like he’s about to start taking notes. “But I’ll try anything you want to do, however you want to do it.”
Maybe it isn't healthy, but she likes that about Eddie. That he’s all in on her, obsessed maybe. Willing to push himself out of his comfort zone for the sake of letting her have what she wants or try what she thinks she wants.
She likes how a few right words will turn him into putty she can squish and meld between her fingers.
“I’m gonna go get changed.”
Now that Eddie is waiting downstairs for something spectacular, it isn't so hard to pull that box down from its hideaway and slide each layer on. She already knew it wasn’t that hard to get the chain on and off by herself, she had tried it on. Maybe squires were for the heavy metal suits like on Scooby-doo. Or maybe it was about the intimacy and the ritual even back then, sliding on pieces and parts meant to keep the other person safe from harm knowing later if there was a chance to undress again you could see just how you helped save them.
Next time, she thinks, they should do this the other way around. She can get Eddie off a couple times, clean him up, and slowly dress him in each new layer. Until he’s lying in her bed armored in metal and cocooned by her cotton sheets. Safe from anything the world might want to do to him. Under her panties, and the sports leggings she’d decided where the sexier choice of pants, she can start to see the evidence of her arousal in the full length mirror.
It’s a good thing Dustin doesn’t want his stuff back.
Her finishing touches go on next. The gold ring with the small green stone that Robin had given her slides on to her index finger. Then around her neck her holy symbol, the guitar pick from Eddie’s first post-almost dying show. Tossed at her from the stage in an act of Bon Jovi badassery. She had gently poked a hole through it and now she slides it on its dainty, gold chain around her neck.
She tugs at her hair in the mirror, the one part that isn’t quite right. In her vision it’s finally grown out, beautiful waves that would fall out of the ugly helmet she doesn’t have when she pulled it off. Waves like Brooke Shields or the girl from One Day at a Time who married the guy from the band Eddie liked have instead of the bob she’s growing out now.
But it would grow and in the meantime she looked hot.
Stevie looked really hot. Swallowing around the saliva pooling in her mouth, she remembers she has a boyfriend to show that to.
Her first reward is the sight of Eddie's jaw dropped against the floor.
“You remember the other day, you were talking about how paladins could get leveled up so high they basically became gods too?”
Stevie knew that wasn't right, but she liked watching the nerd part of him war with the boyfriend part of him. One itching to correct the mistake and the other looking for a way for her to be correct in a roundabout way. Usually, it leaves him flushed and wide eyed, like his brain is overtaxed and with just a little more stress steam will start to burst from his ears to keep his brain from melting. Last week she had him arguing with the Party that humanoid didn't mean hobbits couldn't also be little rabbits.
She decides to take pity on him now, his wheels skidding blankly on wet road.
“I want you to worship me.”
He's agreeing, she thinks, before he's even sure what he's agreeing to. Dropping to his knees in front of her just like the worshiper she imagined: awe struck and devoted. Her divine intervention on his unfinished prayer kept him alive. Eddie Munson would let her kill him if she wanted to, if it suited her whims.
Good thing she wants to keep him for forever.
His hands slide up the back of her legs. She can feel the hot trail of them from the calf up to the thigh.
“Beautiful,” he breathes. Presses a kiss to her knee, her thigh, the chain that covers her hip. “My hero, my knight.”
In the end, she didn’t need the blouse or the bra and panty set. She still has her chainmail on when she eases them both down onto the couch. Running her fingers through Eddie’s hair from his sweat damp temples to the tangling ends she’s careful to keep it from getting wrapped in the links while he rests on top of her.
“I don’t know where you came up with that, my lady, but I think that was the hottest thing to ever happen to me.”
She tugs at the end of his hair just to watch the way the lingering arousal dances across his face. “I got that from the way you creamed your jeans while you were playing with my clit.”
“I am but a man, my golden sun. When a paladin of Apollo is before me what can I do but show my utter devotion.”
“You liked it? It was good for you?”
Maybe it’s a testament to how good it was that Eddie isn’t immediately off the couch. He only shifts enough to rest his chin on her stomach. Looking her in the eyes or maybe at the bottom swell of her breasts.
“Steph, that was the hottest thing that’s ever happened to me. You’re a vision in everything you put on,” he assures, “but where did you even get this?”
“That’s the bad news, if you’re hoping for a better fitting part two I think I’m gonna have to give Dustin my measurements.”
#stevie week#stevieweek2024#steddieweek2024#transfem steve harrington#Stevie Harrington#transmasc eddie munson#steddie#steddie fic#this was supposed to be a pwp but it turns out I cannot write pwp in one evening#believe me I tried#so instead take this fade to black#with the thought that maybe someday I will return and write the smut that goes with it
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idk why but the thought of either you eating sevika out under her desk while she’s trying to work or her doing it to you has taken over my brain the past few days.
like one, just imagine her tall ass trying to fit under a desk just to eat you out. two, imagine you’re slipping down your chair but her face buried in your cunt is the only thing keeping you in place. three, she probably makes you put your legs up on the desk so she has easy access to you.
four, imagine you have to get through a couple papers and sevika’s absolutely not helping you out in any way but every time you tell her you’re done with another paper, you’re rewarded with her tongue licking a single stripe up your cunt.
five, your chair is absolutely soaked by the end of it with her spit and your arousal because she of course did not let you cum just yet and will give you the rest of your reward at home :)

#thank my period that hasn’t even started for possibly the only smut you’re gonna get from me for a while#i actually didn’t cry while trying to write this 👍#also im supposed to be getting a new desk at some point maybe that’s the inspo for this idfk#lesbian brainrot#i’m 😵💫😵💫#sevika#sevika arcane#arcane sevika#arcane#sevika imagine#sevika x reader#sevika x you#sevika smut
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I don't really wish this because daydreaming fic is my survival mechanism -- but I do kind of wish that if work is going to wear me out so much that I can't write anything, that it would also make me too worn out to daydream up more fic ideas. Because when I said 'I'd love to write a remix one day', I did not mean 'right this second with the same story I'm also writing a missing chapter for'. And yet -- ONCE AGAIN -- that is what my brain is doing: brainstorming my own take on this 22 year old fic plot just because I interpret the characters differently than the original author. 🫠💀
#It's the melodrama okay#Like don't get me wrong I had fun leaning into it while outlining the missing chapter#But also it grated against my psyche just enough that it made me wonder how I would've written this if I was tackling it from chapter 1#And now there's an entire evening's worth of yearnful dancing and many many passionate affair smut scenes running through my head#🤷🏻♀️ I DON'T KNOW HOW I'M SUPPOSED TO STOP THESE THOUGHTS#Besides win the lottery; quit my job; and spend all day writing fic so that I can put a proper dent in my backlog#Which I would take#Which billionaire has a special interest in Niles/Daphne fic? Come sponsor me#🙏 For the low low price of 100k a year I will write many many Niles/Daphne fics.#Willing to negotiate a lower salary if you throw in full health insurance#Billionaires?... No?#Well fuck you too 😑
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Thinking about quirrelnet and how much I need more fics of them but I'm literally the only person writing for them right now so if I want more fics I have to write them but I don't want to write all of them I want to read some too and be surprised by what happens because I didn't write it
#idk if this comes off as me complaining but it's not supposed to#i just want more quirrelnet 😔#current wip for them is currently in editing and I've already got the premise for the next one chosen#I think the only fics I haven't read for them are either smut (I strictly don't read smut) or have some weird side ship that I'm not into#(or in some cases they are the side ship but I don't care for the main ship enough to power through)#sighhhh#I've only skimmed wattpad and ff.net and haven't found anything but if you guys have any recs then by all means give them here#even if it's a little shoddily written it's better than nothing#moth rambles#quirrelnet#quirrnet
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Hot Like Ice

Summary: For Christmas, John and Santino decided to vacation in Venice. The cold won't stop them from getting their hands on each other, quite the contrary.
Rating: Explicit
Relationship: Santino D'Antonio/John Wick
Note: A festive fic with these two going to Advent and well... yeah ;)! It was supposed to be shorter and with no smut, but oh well, it's these two. They take over the fics all the time. I was also going through a lot during all this, but I managed to finish it, and it's here! :]
☆ SPECIAL THANKS TO @mrssimply ☆ for beta reading and helping out! I appreciate it a lot! <33
Please enjoy the festive steamy with these two! ^ ^
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
Snippet
December arrived quickly and so did the festive spirit. Even if Santino struggled to admit it, he liked it. He liked all of these decorations, the lights, even some sweets. There was a special spark in his eyes whenever they would walk together and Santino would look at all those colorful decorations with a shy smile.
Then again, there was one big problem for Santino with winter. The cold. He liked snow, the aesthetic of it, but really he was always complaining to John about the cold. Or when he was shivering even at home, John literally bought a couple of blankets just for him.
Especially when Santino would fall asleep by his working desk or on the couch after overworking himself to the point of passing out from exhaustion. If he was really deep asleep, John would carry him to the bed and then put the blanket over him, but if his partner was half awake and muttered something tiredly to leave him alone, he would put the blanket over him and kiss his head. In those cases, Santino either stayed like that or followed John in bed with the blanket over his shoulders and snuggled against his warm lover.
Either way, the Camorra prince didn't like feeling cold.
They were spending a few weeks off their work— actually Santino's work, in Venice for Christmas holidays. John suggested Rome at first but there were too many hurtful memories that his companion wished to forget from there.
“I always wanted to visit Venice,” Santino finally confessed shyly after rejecting holiday offers all day. With that, it was decided. Venice was the place.
It really was beautiful, especially now with so many decorations and lights. While the whole city was gorgeous, what was most appealing to John was his lover who finally looked like he was truly happy. That smile on Santino's face, the look in his eyes as he explored every detail he could spot, that was the most important thing to John.
He also appreciated how Santino got dressed so handsomely. A black jacket John had gifted him as an early present, of course from a famous Italian brand, a waistcoat hidden under the coat with a tie, and a gray soft scarf to try and keep him warmer. A stunning look, Santino was definitely the most handsome guy there.
“You look beautiful,” John said breathlessly when they stopped by a tree decorated with lights, stunned by his partner's looks, and how handsome he was.
Santino chuckled, caught off guard, “You said that already so many times in the apartment and on our way here.” They were just about to enter the Advent.
“Well, it's never enough,” the other man murmured and leaned to kiss him on the cheek. His usually warm face was now a bit colder. No wonder, it was almost freezing outside. “Are you cold? I can give you my jacket-”
“It's fine, don't worry. I just have to get used to it, that's all,” Santino replied with a soft smile. “I can smell the mulled wine from over here, I've been craving it for a while. I wonder how good they are making it here. I bet it's better than the ones in New York.” He winked playfully and pulled on John's arm to make him follow.
Read the rest on Ao3
#the Advent fic! ^ ^#this wasn't even supposed to be smut but like i said Santino and John took over#BUT YEAH HERE WE ARE YAY#the freaks at advent >:]#wickedsaint#santino d’antonio#santino d'antonio#john wick#john wick x santino d'antonio#my writing#wickblr
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in reference to my last post... when it comes to arcane herald viktor... YEAH SO I HAVE A LOT TO SAY ACTUALLY!!!!! I HOPE YOU'RE READY TO FUCK THAT BUG NASTY STYLE

#insert obligatory 'this was supposed to be short but I got carried away' message here#no but actually. it actually was#thankfully guys I promise I am nearly done like actually#I'm working on the last scene right now like they're ALMOST done fucking#reader is genderless in this fic#and their anatomy is not described only that vik is fucking them lol#will detail the tags properly#I can't even lie. this might be the nastiest thing I've written in a long while#of course I am physically incapable of writing smut without silly emotions#but the smut is pretty freak nasty monsterfucking#he's scary....... scary hot.............#waiter. more self indulgent fics please#the like 5 people who voted to kiss the arcane herald in my which viktor would you kiss poll I SEE YOU
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wait i think i cracked the code MY CURSE I THINK I FINALLY UNDERSTAND IT ..
#my curse being that i can never write about my favs IT IS BECAUSE#per my rambling tags on my post about smut anyways#all of the relationships and whatnot i picture with them are very like. chill yk#like yes there are angsty situations and whatnot but for the most part it’s just silly and fun and lighthearted#like ‘oh what would going to a party with phainon be like ^^’#not ‘let me make him a prisoner of war dying of magical tuberculosis in a dusty basement’#BUT i just cannot write that longterm. i get bored of modern/chill stuff so quickly when i have to Write it#hence why my second fav or even characters i hate are easy to write about becase idc about making them endure the horrors#this doesn’t really Solve my issue actually but at least it makes more sense now i suppose#m’s thoughts
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