#Vocal Online Course
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Master Your Singing with Doe Paoro's Voice Training Course
Doe Paoro's Online Voice Coaching is your pathway to achieving vocal mastery. Our Vocal Online Course provides structured and effective Voice Training Courses that cater to your unique vocal needs. Learn to sing with confidence and precision under the expert guidance of Doe Paoro. Our comprehensive program is designed to enhance your vocal skills, making you a more versatile and confident singer. Enroll now and take the first step towards transforming your voice with Doe Paoro.
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Part of the reason I rarely venture outside of my containment bubble is that I may see something totally innocuous and become possessed by dark forces that make me run around gathering armfuls of books so I can yell about my hyperfixations in unnecessary detail...
#I see something completely unimportant that's slightly incorrect and if I don't say something my head explodes#At least here it is contained#This is a quarantine blog and you are all talking to me through the tent walls/screen whatever#babbling#the other part is that my online social skills are atrocious#text medium makes me nervous because I can read even less tone in that than usual#of course vocal medium is slightly unintelligible but eh
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i think my tolerance for moe (ie the anime stuff) is in freefall rn
#(very long tags just a warning)#once you start realising how ingrained the idea is of youth as the ultimate ideal is you see it everywhere and it gets annoying#the way most popular media is about teenagers doing stuff. the way all the popular art is conventionally attractive people#people calling porcelain doll-faced anime girls in gachas ''milfs'' and ''grandmas''#and in the same way the moe ideal is of youthful characters you can find ''cute'' or you're meant to feel you want to protect#something that's more about what they make you feel rather than anything seen as an actual person#and ''moe voice'' anime girl samples/vocals are everywhere in some the genres of music i listen to#so of course this shit is everywhere online. you go to discuss a certain game and nobody gives a fuck about the female mc as a person#they just want to share sanitised art where she's cute or in a maid outfit or whatever#they never have to think about the female characters in a story when they can just call her cute and share said art#they don't want a person they want something cute#age lines and anger and low periods and certain body types and other facts of life considered ''undesirable'' have no place in moe#people don't want that stuff. and that's what gets me. it's internalised and ingrained EVERYWHERE#and that's transformed into something very ugly in that it's being taken as an ideal rather than a character type#and it means a lot of the things i think are part of the experience of living are cut out and ignored and treated as unwanted#as well as manifesting as ageism and racism and xenophobia at worst when taken as an actual ideal#why do you think there are so many far right wingers who love all that moe stuff and have anime pfps?#anyway back to my main point of irritation with youth as an ideal: that's just an extreme case#i consider moe a form of crystallisation of youth as an ideal as well as what Certain People want from women#and that's why i find myself. tolerating it less.#i don't want a small anime girl to find cute and ''protect'' and otherwise not think about i want a PERSON#anyway ik nobody's gonna read this i just. i tried to listen to a mashup album from 2011 today#i got annoyed with the constant high pitched moe voice samples and had to turn it off bc i was thinking about all of this#i've never really gotten annoyed w it like this til now tbh
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Website: https://www.raiseyourvoice.net.au/
Address: Peakhurst, NSW, Australia
Raise Your Voice by Lea Baker offers expert vocal coaching, helping students discover their free, authentic, well produced voice.
- What I Do:
I help people find their freely produced, efficient and authentic voice. I love to teach and empower students. Each singer is different, there is no 'one size fits all'. My sessions involve lots of physical and vocal explorations, positive reinforcement and lots of encouragement.
Using actors' voice training techniques, I help singers find freedom through embodying their voice and releasing unhelpful tension.
I believe ‘trying harder’ nearly always leads to vocal difficulties. When vocalists discover the power and range of natural, organic and instinctive sounds, they grow in confidence and ease - often discovering the voice they didn’t know they had!
I help those who rely on their speaking voice for their profession, such as teachers, public speakers and call centre workers (to name a few!), avoid vocal fatigue, become more engaging to their listeners and maintain a healthy voice.
- What I Offer:
Success in learning depends on finding the right Instructor; someone who knows the subject well and understands how you learn. My teaching style is practical, holistic, non-gimmicky, and based on science. Students learn how to sing or speak optimally. Clear specific language and examples are used, leading students on a self-discovery journey. Everyone has a voice. My job is to help you release its full potential.
Here are the four philosophies I follow:
* Trying harder will almost always lead to a deterioration in vocal improvement. It’s finding the ease in vocal use that is the key. Less is often more.
* The most freely produced and authentic singing or speaking comes from your natural, organic and instinctive voice. Often it's noticing and releasing unhelpful vocal habits & muscle tension to find that voice.
* I believe learning is about self-exploration and discovery, with guidance from your voice coach. Doing what the teacher asks to gain their approval isn’t learning.
* Training at NIDA opened up a whole new world. Using acting voice training helps singers to feel and sense their voice, rather than just hear it.
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* I help the student discover for themselves with guidance and targeted techniques.
* I take the time to understand the mindset of the student towards their voice and address this in my coaching.
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* Students get clear explanations of the ‘why’ when to comes to voice usage.
* My Teaching is underpinned by a good understanding of the science and physiology of the voice.
* Finding the unhelpful habits or traits of the student and helping them rewire these.
* Experiential learning is key, helping students to discover for themselves, no “pleasing the teacher”.
* Learning is layered. What each particular student needs at this particular time. I don’t clutter them up with lots of ‘nice to know’ stuff - it's not about how much I know, it's about what the student needs to be a better singer, speaker or performer.
* Voice lessons are either online or in person (Covid safe).
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🎻 Discover the magic of music with our online violin classes! Learn at your own pace with expert guidance, whether you’re a beginner or looking to sharpen your skills. Join us and let your musical journey begin! 🌟🎶
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Wellesley School of Music
Website: https://www.wellesleyschoolofmusic.com
Address: 51 Grove St, Wellesley, Massachusetts 02482, United States
Wellesley School of Music offers a unique blend of music education and healing arts. Specializing in violin, piano, and voice lessons for ages 6-12, the school provides both in-person and online classes. Additionally, it offers eclectic services like ecstatic dance events, crystal reiki sound baths, and music composition guidance. The school's approach combines professional music training with creative expression and wellness, catering to a diverse community in Wellesley and beyond.
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wellesleyschoolofmusic/
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Hi Mark. With a lot of talk recently in the online space about the unreasonable outrage and horrendous death threats towards the Commander Rules Committee and Commander Advisory Group, I want to thank you for being the proverbial "shield" for some of the most heinous and grotesque backlash towards WOTC as the unofficial public representative for MTG. I know it can be absolutely draining for your mental health to receive harassment in this position, so I just want to say I am grateful and empathize that you are in this position. With that being said, as one of the most prominent faces of Magic, is it possible if you could say a word or two about the aforementioned harassment towards the RC and CAG to deter these harassers and possibly share your own experiences regarding unconstructive hate to help the victims of such depravity (if you're comfortable sharing)?
There are advantages and disadvantages of being one of the faces for Magic. When people like something we're doing, even when I had nothing to do with it, I get lots of praise. Most players only know a handful of Wizards employees, so they tend to assume that the people they know are responsible for the things that are happening.
There is, of course, a downside to that. When things happen people dislike, I'm also the light rod for complaint. Whether or not I had anything to do with the issue in question, I get the blame. I am Head Designer. Many times, I did have a hand or a say in what happened. And when I'm responsible, or partly responsible, for something, I try to own up to it.
Players are not a unified front though. When we do thing X, some of you will like it while others will not. I often will get complimented for the same thing I'm being yelled at for.
From time to time, we do something a majority are unhappy with. At times, we do things a majority are *very* unhappy with. That's when things can get a bit ugly. There are a lot of civilities built into daily life. There are just things you don't do or say to another human being. Most of that goes out the window online.
For some reason, the anonymity combined with just how social media has evolved has emboldened people to do and say things they never would in person (and I should also acknowledge society has changed in ways that even what's acceptable in person has changed).
What this means is I get a lot of negativity, some of it very personal. I'm not just talking about people criticizing the in-game choices I've made (or often didn't even make), but comments on me as a person, about who I am and what they think of me. People tell me that want bad things to happen to me. Not just getting fired (although that's a popular one), people vocalize, sometimes quite graphically, about things they want to happen to me.
The first few times this happened, I took it pretty hard. Having lots of people attack you online, saying horrible things about you, is tough. Humans look to other humans for approval. It's just built into our DNA to want others to like us. Having people attack you hurts. You have trouble sleeping, eating, it just weighs on you emotionally.
I was bullied as a kid. This really isn't much different except its much higher in volume and very public.
With time, I learned to adapt to it. It's not that I enjoy people saying nasty things about me. It still sucks, but I've found ways to process it. I came to realize that someone being nasty is more a commentary on them than me. And I adopted a philosophy of looking past the words to the message behind it. Most people complaining didn't like a choice we made about the game. I could focus on the feedback and less on the delivery method. But that took years, and it has a lot to do with who I am as a person. I enjoy the things I get to do with a public profile, so I accept what comes with it.
I've made the conscious choice to build a thick skin and weather social media, so I can continue doing what I love. It saddens me that I have to.
I say all this because I don't know if people really process the harm they're doing when they get negative online, especially towards another person. Most people do not have the years of processing angry messages like I do.
Words have an impact and that doesn't matter whether you're speaking them directly to someone's face or typing them in the privacy of your home.
Bullying is not okay. Cruelty is not okay. Making a conscious choice to belittle another human being, especially because they made a choice you disagree with about a game, is not okay.
When you use ugly words, you are doing harm to another human being (sometimes many human beings). Imagine if someone attacked you like that, or a loved one, or a friend. Don't do something to another human being that would cause pain if it was done to you.
That doesn't mean you can't communicate unhappiness. It doesn't mean you can't vocalize that you disagree with a decision made. I would stress two things. One, make it about the decision and not the person who made the decision. Explain why and how the decision impacts you, not what you think of the person because they made the decision.
Two, watch your language. As I said above, words have power. They can be used to build or to destroy. Is the language you're using designed to hurt? If so, don't use it. Use other language. If you need to take time to calm down, do so.
Community is what we as individuals choose for it to be. One of the things I love about the Magic community is how kind it can be, how accepting it can be, how uplifting it can be. But that's because we each individually choose to do that. The Magic community can get ugly, but only if we allow it to become so.
So please, the next time you're making a message designed to do something destructive rather than constructive, take a moment to reflect. Why are you doing this? What is your goal? Is it your intent to hurt someone? Because that's what negative language does.
I ask the Magic community to be better. I know we have the potential. I've seen it.
Be part of the solution, not the problem.
Thanks.
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This online course has been the most liberating experience I have ever had and it has given me self-respect and motivation to study singing more. If you're also looking for singing masterclass online then here is your destination. Visit https://the-maestro-online.com/singing-course-masterclasses
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🍸 What’s Your Poison?🍸
Hi,I’m A—Jay! Nice to meet you,honey🩷
• Bbygirl of ‘01
• March🌷Pisces Princess
• Somehow managing to work a big girl job in the real world of the USA
Just vibin’ & thrivin’ on my new little blog sharing my cute little ideas with cute little strangers.
(That’s you, babe. You’re the cute stranger💋)
*Hwang Hyunjin bias based!*
(But you’ll see me reblog all the boys!!)
Join me for Happy Hour Gossip!
I’m open to request or a chat if you’d like to giggle,rant,or cry with me!
*Request:fake text(predominately),drabbles,au prompts,etc(I have more time for shorter fics)
*I will not write member x member or poly(just not into that,sorry)incest/step siblings, taboo/hardcore themes, include the members’ real life family, and I will politely decline your request if it’s something I am not comfortable with writing or speaking on :)
*Stray Kids are real people & therefore everything below is completely fictional. This doesn’t reflect who they truly are in any way, shape, or form. I am not trying to misconstrue who they are in real life.
Don’t forget to touch grass,babe <3
✨Everyone’s welcome at Stay’s Bar✨
(especially my fellow Black stays🤎)
**MDNI & SFW Rules**
Minors(16+)are free to interact with my blog as long as you keep it cute & appropriate.
*SFW* Fics are safe for the younger stays and will usually only have profanity listed as the main warning.
*MDNI* Fics are self explanatory and should not be interacted with unless you are 18+
Keep it cute or get blocked <3
Angst⛈️/🌩️; Fluff🧸; Smut/Suggestive🔥
FWB!Hyunjin Text Series 🧸⛈️🔥 (MDNI)
A late night text accidentally sent to one of the artist you’re working with leads to a half a year long agreement and Hyunjin wants more…
(fwb to lovers)(IdolxMusic Producer!Reader)
Before You Ruined My Outfit? 🌩️🧸 (SFW)
Han Jisung is your childhood best friend and his attempt at playing Cupid goes horribly wrong somehow thanks to Hyunjin…
Fix Your Face, Please! 🧸🌩️ (MDNI)
Hyunjin’s very vocal about how jealous & possessive he can get, and although it can get troublesome you find it kind of hot…
We Were On Break!! 🌩️🧸 (SFW)
Your ex boyfriend, Hyunjin, has a hard time accepting the end of your relationship and is very persistent on getting back together…
Corporate Gang 🧸 (MDNI)
JYP Co. gets a new IT-Agent and you can’t help but gush about him to your favorite coworkers…
(Nerdy,shy!Hyunjin Series)
Take Your Friends Out ⛈️🧸 (pt.1 ) (MDNI)
Your boyfriend has stood you up 3x this month and you decide that you’re done with being second place. Of course he disagrees…
Don’t Say That To Me ⛈️ (pt 2.) (MDNI)
Months after you took Hyunjin back you have to face the tough reality of falling out of love with him and end things for good…
Stress Induced Fever 🧸 (SFW)
Your job has decided to transfer you to their USA branch for a year and Hyunjin is failing miserably at holding himself together before you leave…
Sad Nudes? 🧸 (MDNI)
You’ve had a shit day and Hyunjin tries his best to cheer you up thousands of miles away…
I Love You. Now Date Me! 🧸🌩️ (SFW)
Your bestfriend has been jokingly telling you he’s in love with you for years only for you to find out it’s not a joke…and oh yeah, he HATES your boyfriend…
Babe, I Broke It 🧸 (SFW)
Hyunjin broke your brand new coffee mug and he’s taking it harder than you are (soft bbyboy)…
I Really Like You, Like Romantically 🔥🧸(MDNI)
Your best friend asks you for an insane favor of helping him lose his virginity and discovers his feelings in the process…
I Will Win! Fighting!🔥🧸 (MDNI)
You and Hyunjin make a friendly bet to survive No Nut November and despite his persistent confidence on winning, he eventually gives in…
Emergency Contact ⛈️ (SFW)
You and Hyunjin had a mutual breakup over a year ago, but apparently he forgot to remove you as his emergency contact and feelings are revisted…
Safe,Loved,& Accepted ⛈️ (SFW)
Bang Chan has been making light of the nasty comments you’ve been getting online until you are put in a sticky situation and he’s worried sick a thousand of miles away…
Have You Always Been This Hot?? 🔥🧸 (MDNI)
Attempting to survive No Nut November with your best friend Chan brings forth feelings neither of you knew existed…and really good sex…
I Just Want To Help ⛈️ (SFW)
Your ex Hyunjin takes it upon himself to help you with financial difficulties after months of no contact, but he never expected you to fight him every step of the way…
Wanna See It Up Close? 🔥🧸 (MDNI)
You always jokingly try to convince your best friend to get laid and he jokingly tells you to take his virginity (except it’s not a joke)…
I Hate You. All Of You. 🌩️ (SFW)
A sneaky picture brings your relationship and trust crashing down and he refuses to let it all go over a stupid misunderstanding….
Keeping Secrets 🌩️ (SFW)
Felix’s antics leaves Hyunjin an over dramatic mess and it takes an entire week before he confronts you about the secret you’ve been hiding…
Is This A Trick Question? 🌩️🧸 (SFW)
It’s not a secret that Hyunjin’s perusing you romantically, but despite returning his feelings your past relationship holds you back. Little did you know Hyunjin was just what you needed to try at love again…
Model!Hyunjin Text Series 🧸🔥(SFW/MDNI)
At the height of his career, Hwang Hyunjin goes down the road nearly every 24 year old with fame in the public eye does - sex, money, and rebellion. You accepted a job set up by his parents to get his reputation and career back on track, and you’ve known no peace since thanks to your very clingy (and unashamedly in love) client…
(ModelxAssistant!Reader)(grumpy gf,sunshine bf)
#hyunjin#hyunjin x y/n#skz hyunjin#hyunjin imagines#hwang hyujin imagines#hwang hyunjin#hyunjin x reader#hyunjin smut#skz fake texts#skz au#skz fluff#skz smut#skz imagines#skz scenarios#skz#skz x reader#skz fanfic#skz aus#skz stay#stray kids angst#stray kids fake texts#stray kids fluff#stray kids fanfic#stray kids x reader#stray kids smut#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#stray kids#skz ot8#stray kids au
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Discover Your Voice with Doe Paoro's Vocal Online Courses
Doe Paoro presents a range of dynamic vocal online courses designed to help you unleash your true vocal potential. With our tailored approach to voice training, you'll receive personalized coaching and support from industry professionals, all from the comfort of your own home. Whether you're looking to develop your singing voice, improve your public speaking skills, or enhance your overall vocal performance, our courses offer practical techniques and invaluable insights to help you succeed. Elevate your voice and join our community of passionate learners today!q
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something i’ve noticed lately is online leftists being ignorant to some (most) forms of antisemitism, but vocal ONLY about jokes/stereotypes about jewish ethnic features.
they can point out the big nose stereotypes all day long (and they should) but when we beg them to have more concern for conspiracy theories, double standards for jews/israel, disinformation about jewish history and the war, holocaust inversion/denial/fake care for survivors, using zionism as a get out of jail card for judenhass, generalizing all israelis and diaspora jews as genocidal, denying that most jews identify with zionism, misusing jewish terms, demonizing jewish culture and hebrew, actual modern day blood libel, tokenization, accusing jews of “stealing culture”, denying indigeneity, painting ashke jews as white colonizers/villains, completely disregarding other diaspora groups, calling for israelis to be murdered, trying to “revoke” israelis’ jewishness, falsely calling the jewish people /only/ a religious group, redefining or goysplaining words/concepts they learned last week, using historically antisemitic canards, desecrating jewish monuments, houses, businesses, schools, and synagogues, AND literal, physical violence against jews….
it’s silence. crickets. it’s excuses and justifications. it’s thoughtless conversation enders. it’s refusal to sit with discomfort and address one’s mistakes. it’s a buzzword copy and pasted with a flag. “death to israel” or “kys zionist”. it’s “antizionism ≠ antisemitism”.
if you refuse to acknowledge the many forms antisemitism takes, of course you’d hyperfocus on one specific type. racist tropes about jews in media are awful. they’re harmful and part of dehumanization.
but if your understanding of antisemitism starts and ends at “greedy long nosed goblins in harry potter,” and you refuse to listen to jews, and refuse to see how antisemitism functions outside of pop culture and how it manifests into verbal and physical violence, you are no ally.
spreading antisemitism will not help palestinians at all, and it’s so fucking devastating that online activists can log on and feel vindicated and like they’re all heroic just for harassing random jews. meanwhile they’re wasting time and energy that could go towards something that ACTUALLY helps the palestinian people.
(also funny that they wanna call jews white when these stereotypes are about non-white ethnic features. and they stem from nazi propaganda about jews/jewish blood “ruining” white genetics. i could go on and on about the weird racial science lefties have ran with since oct7, especially within what we understand as race/ethnicity as social groupings, what makes someone indigenous, the weird blood quantum shit, noble savage trope, and the infantilization of palestinians)
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I saw this really great thread on twitter by Grungygrim and it definitely highlights my thoughts and frustrations with the story of these games and the Splatoon fandom as a whole. (be forewarned, i get really tilted in this blog post fyi.)
I made a blog post about 2 weeks ago where i said that i was happy that the narrative online that "Callie is an idiot who got kidnapped and then brainwashed/mind controlled against her consent" is going away. (Here's the link: https://www.tumblr.com/dr-spectre/749710338672525312/im-so-happy-that-the-narrative-online-that?source=share)
Unfortunately I'm gonna have to retract a lot of the stuff i said. I'm still seeing, TILL THIS DAY THAT NARRATIVE ONLINE! IM STILL SEEING SO MUCH MISINFORMATION AND IT MAKES ME REALLYYYY ANGRYYYY!!! As a big fan of Callie, people completely outright ignoring her character arc THAT WAS SET UP SINCE SPLATOON 1 BY THE WAY!!! and not even bothering to look at outside sources for more information and lore genuinely pisses me the fuck off to no end.
No, hypnosis is NOT MIND CONTROL/BRAINWASHING! I DONT WANNA KEEP REPEATING IT! YOU CAN LOOK IT UP! if a person is genuinely uncomfortable and doesn't wish to take the suggestions to heart while hypnotized, THEY WONT DO SO! THEY STILL HAVE CONTROL! Yes, Marie did say "kidnapped" in some of her dialogue, but from her perspective, OF COURSE SHE'S GONNA THINK CALLIE GOT KIDNAPPED! She's known to worry about Callie all the time and ruminate about her, of course she's gonna think of the worst case scenario, doesn't mean she's right though. Was Octavio still in the wrong for hypnotizing Callie in the first place and allowing her to bring out her darker traits more easily? YEAH! NO SHIT! HE'S A BAD DUDE! Not a totally evil person but he has made some awful decisions out of desperation for his people. Why do you think he was so quick to help out the New Squidbeak Splatoon in the finale of Splatoon 3? His people got turned into fluffy monsters by a giant bear, he's all about helping his people.
Hell look at how Callie acts while under the Hypnoshades, she decorates Octo Canyon and her peppy and energetic self is still in tact even during the final boss, she's just more mean and violent. Callie was in an emotional and mentally unwell situation due to her overworking herself and being incredibly lonely as her relationship with Marie was damaged overtime. Callie accepted the suggestions of DJ Octavio and heard him out, AS SAID BY HER FROM THE RELATIONSHIP CHART! She wasn't forced into anything. She didn't suffer "sexual abuse" from Octavio by being forced into skippy clothing as some psychos say online, if she didn't want to wear that outfit she wouldn't cause hypnosis is NOT MIND CONTROL!! I hate having to repeat this over and over again, i hate how the developers basically rushed and ruined this interesting villain arc with stupid shades, only to try and hastily fix it later with an obscure post about A GOD DAMN RELATIONSHIP CHART THAT PEOPLE EITHER DONT KNOW ABOUT OR DONT CARE TO LOOK AT BECAUSE THEY SEE SPLATOON AS SOMETHING FOR KIDS AND TO NOT GIVE ANY CARE TOWARDS!!!!!!!!
I made a god damn giant blog explaining Callie in Splatoon 2 because i felt so frustrated about how my favorite character in the series was being treated and i tried to salvage the story that the writers tried to make. The way that people made her situation worse by saying she got kidnapped and forcibly ""mind controlled/brainwashed"" actually gave me chest pain, thinking about that kind of scenario for Callie actually hurts me... Heck i cant even listen to the Splatoon 2 stage music or final boss music because hearing her reversed vocals makes me feel uncomfortable due to the misinformation online. I hated all the misinformation and i wanted it to stop. HELL EVEN IN GIANT TIMELINE VIDEOS WHERE PEOPLE DO TONS OF RESEARCH THEY STILL GET IT WRONG!! UGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! i guess it'll still be the common and popular notion that Callie is an idiot that got kidnapped and then ""mind controlled"" by some shades... oh well... ugh...
I'm sorry if I'm coming off as really angry, i am. It's just, my brain is really hyperfixated on this squid and she means a lot to me. Seeing the way the fandom as well as the writers treat her makes me really mad. I hope i can find some peeps who feel the same way as i do. Misinformation is so frustrating man... i dont even wanna get into the Octarians because that's a whole other can of worms... anyways im done ranting. have a good night or good morning wherever you live y'all.
#splatoon#splatoon 2#splatoon 3#callie cuttlefish#callie splatoon#rant post#complaining#sorry for the rant#octo callie#dj octavio#marie splatoon#marie cuttlefish#octo canyon
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"In the past, whenever the movies in Hollywood went stale and executives exerted too much control over artists, the industry had an important hand brake: the audience. If a movie bombed with audiences and box office numbers plummeted, then studios would have to change course. After all, the box office has always been viewed as the gold standard of metrics in Hollywood for a reason: it’s the most distilled and straightforward measurement of audience interest. Moviegoers must choose to buy tickets. They cannot skip around, fast-forward, or order groceries through the Prime app on their phone. No moviegoer enters a theater expecting to leave after two minutes. Until Netflix, one of cinema’s essential qualities, the thing that distinguished it from television, was the way it commanded an audience’s attention. Whether a movie grossed big numbers or bombed, a box office report carried an inadmissible truth: the vast majority of the audience experienced the movie in full, and its taste couldn’t be ignored.
How to predict the audience’s taste — what will make money and what won’t — is a question that’s plagued Hollywood since its inception. The problem was captured by the screenwriter William Goldman in 1983. “Nobody knows anything,” he wrote in his book Adventures in the Screen Trade. “Not one person in the entire motion picture field knows for a certainty what’s going to work.” Netflix’s greatest innovation was that it found a way around this uncertainty: it provided a platform on which there are no failures, where everything works.
This is an important milestone for the largest Hollywood studios as they all set their sights on integrating artificial intelligence into their productions. In March, news outlets reported that OpenAI CEO Sam Altman had held meetings with top studios to showcase his company’s text-to-video generator, Sora. Clips generated by Sora that circulated online alternated between drone shots of cityscapes that look ripped from video-game cut scenes and animals rendered in the 3D animated style common to Hollywood productions today. Streaming platforms are the only place where this garbage makes any sense — a place where it would never be watched at all.
But by insulating their films from failure, the streamers have destroyed the meaning of success. Thierry Frémaux, head of the Cannes Film Festival and a vocal critic of streamers, understood this well when he presented the dilemma at a Cannes press conference in 2021. “What directors have been discovered by [streaming] platforms?” he asked. It wasn’t a rhetorical question. Frémaux began calling on journalists to name an auteur whose career had been launched by a streamer. By this point, Netflix had released more than seven hundred films in the US alone, with hundreds of directors attached. Yet as the Guardian later reported of the scene, “nobody could name any at all, in fact.”
Here, streaming platforms have achieved a strange paradox. Never has a group of studios gained so much control over the production, distribution, exhibition, and reception of movies by making movies no one cares about or remembers. Having not only failed to discover a new generation of auteurs, the streamers have also ensured that their filmmakers are little more than precarious content creators, ineligible to share the profits of any hit. It’s a shift that has induced a profound sense of confusion."
Casual Viewing by Will Tavlin, for n+1 mag
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if you’re still taking and writing delulu fantasies could i please request one where you meet noah (say you know people working in the scene so you meet them backstage after a show when your friends invite you to spend time with them?).
you’re used to meeting band dudes so it’s nothing but noah tries to appear chill in his pursuit of you. you think he’s cute so you go with it but the most awkward flirtation and cringy smut ensues. (my kink’s an embarrassed noah 😌) thank you so much! <3
Cringey, embarrassed smut? That’s a first for me, and I’m kind of excited LOL. Hopefully this is what you’re looking for!
After Writing Notes: Yaknow, every time I start one of these things, I tell myself I'm going to make it shorter...Anyway, here's 9000 words. Hope you enjoy! Also, huge shoutout to @notyourmomsromancenovel for helping me come up with ideas for cringey smut.
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: injury, fainting, smut (in the goofiest way ever)
Beautiful Mistakes
When you pictured Noah Sebastian - front man and lead vocalist in the viral metal-core band Bad Omens - you pictured something way different.
You had been following the band’s work for a while and, like everyone else, had noticed the immediate shift in their persona and presence. You had been a softcore fan of theirs since 2018, and spent many nights on Twitch, playing Elden Ring and listening to his streams as background noise. Sometimes you had been one of the only people in the chat, listening to him produce his beats or record rough vocals. Other times, you sat and chatted with him while he idly played guitar.
Once the pandemic hit full force, there were plenty of nights you sat and talked to Noah, watching the hilarity that ensued. Cat-eared headset on and music playing, Noah would stare at his screen, munching on the Body of Christ and making ridiculous noises.
“Where are my regulars? I need someone to talk to!”
/CrossContaminate/: I’m right here, calm down.
“Hey! Cross is here! I haven’t seen you in a while.”
/CrossContaminate/: I have a job, Noah. You wouldn’t know about that. 😝
“Woooooow…” He pressed a hand to his chest and stared straight into the camera. “That one stung, girl.”
/CrossContaminate/: How do you know I’m a girl? I could be a 50 year old dude, yaknow.
He raised his eyebrows at that. “You’ve got a point. Maybe you should come on video chat with all of us so we can be sure.” He lowered his glasses down on his nose and looked dead into the camera. “For my own safety, of course.”
You cackled loudly at this, typing out your response.
/CrossContaminate/: Nah, I don’t vid chat. You’ll just have to take my word for it.
He rolled his eyes, and smirked. “Same old Cross, I see.”
Noah tried to get you to join video chat regularly often over the years. He had DM'ed you a few times when he saw you were online, wanting to voice call or join a Discord with him, to which you always declined.
You didn’t have a hard and fast rule against chatting online with people via voice or video, you just didn’t do it. Your life was busy and hectic. You didn’t have a ton of time to yourself, so the nights where you got to sit and just not exist in the real world, and only online, it was nice to just remain anonymous.
You had stumbled across Noah’s Twitch by accident once, when looking for something different. His face captured you, however, and once you clicked into it, you were hooked. It wasn’t so much because he was good looking - he was definitely a cutie - but he looked ridiculous.
His hair was long and haphazard. He was wearing an oversized hoodie, drinking cheap wine straight from the bottle, and he was wearing huge bottle cap sunglasses. It was, by far, the goofiest thing you had seen in a long time. He was playing Dead Space, and would jump at the smallest noises, nearly screaming anytime a monster popped into the frame.
But, as all things, time moved on, and he changed. Once the pandemic was waning down, he had began preparing for the release of his next album. The streams became less frequent, and he put his account on a permanent hiatus.
It was a bummer, so you couldn’t help but try keeping track of him on socials. He was decently active on Twitter and Instagram, but even that began to slow down. He had enough followers that your personal account went unnoticed by him.
Aside from his online presence, his appearance also changed pretty dramatically in a very short time. He cut all of his hair off, which, to be entirely honest, broke your heart some. You had always loved the innocence he seemed to maintain by having the long hair. It hurt your feelings to see it go, but you had to admit, the short hair was something else entirely.
Before, Noah typically stuck to regular t-shirts and jeans, simple and timeless rock and roll fashion. Once they started touring for TDOPOM album, you noticed the dramatic change in their stage presence. Ski masks, all black clothing, track pants, and heavy coats. Noah usually ended the set in a black wife-beater top, and you noticed the other change.
He was fucking stacked, now. Noah had always been skinny and long - like a toothpick. Not anymore. His shoulders had broadened, his neck was thicker, and his arms were defined and muscular. That was a change you didn’t mind at all.
What happened? Was second puberty a thing? Because you swore that could be the only explanation for such a drastic difference in Noah in such a short time period.
Although you watched the band from afar, you never had made any time to go see them live, always working anymore. That sucked, because even if you had, it’s not like you’d be able to see him. He was too big of a celebrity now, and you were far from. He likely wouldn’t even remember you, so you never bothered.
As silly as it sounded, it almost hurt your feelings the same as watching an old friend change and grow apart from you over time, even though that wasn’t exactly the case here.
Although, you rationalized that you and him did speak nearly every day for almost two whole years - so it wasn’t that silly, was it?
So you were absolutely floored when your best friend called you, random Friday evening, and asked you for a favor.
“I booked a gig for tomorrow, and I know it’s last minute, but the guy who was supposed to be helping ate some bad sushi or something, and I could desperately use a hand.”
You groaned, rolling your eyes, trying not to be too loud in the Target checkout line.
“It’s my only day off, Iz.”
She huffed. “I know, I know, but I promise it pays really well!”
You growled into the receiver. “Dude, I just did a gig last night, and I have another to do tonight!”
“It’s only four hours! And it pays twelve hundred.”
You were ready to protest, but stopped. “Total?”
“A piece.”
“Fuck, dude. That’s more than double what a normal gig that long pays.”
“I know, that’s why I’m saying, worth the exhaustion.”
You finished scanning your items, pulling your card out to pay. “That kind of money, probably a big band. Who is it?”
“Bad Omens, have you heard of them?”
You stopped, eyes snapping up and fingers stalling at the card reader. “No shit, huh?”
“So, you have heard of them?”
You grabbed your bag, making your way outside. “Yeah, actually. Remember that guy on Twitch I used to talk to?”
“Noah?” It took her a second to put the pieces together, so you stayed silent while she did. “Oh, Noah! As in Noah Sebastian!”
“Bingo.”
“Well shit! Maybe he remembers you!”
You shook your head, taking a long gulp of your iced coffee. “Mm-mm,” You set the drink down. “he never saw my face or heard my voice. Didn’t even know my real name.”
“Seriously?”
“Yep. Only knew me by my tag. He called me ‘Cross’ for short.”
“Ah, okay, so he’ll have no idea who you are!” She laughed at this.
You switched the call to your Bluetooth and sighed. “I guess, since you asked so fucking nicely and I need to pay my rent, I will agree to do the gig with you.”
She squeaked in appreciation. “You’re saving my ass, dude.”
You shrugged. “Pick me up at least two hours before. We need time to prepare.”
“Noon, then?”
“I’ll be ready.”
You and Isobel were known, by the official term in the industry, as Venue Assistants. You were independent contractors who were recommended to acts by the venues, and hired by those bands for specific occasions to help ensure a smooth, easy show. This could mean anything from stocking the green room, switching out instruments, helping with outfit changes, grabbing anything the artists needed. It was an exhausting job, and you had been doing it for about five years now. As tiring as it was, it paid well, and it was a lot of fun. You had the opportunity to meet some of the best bands in the industry - and some of the worst. You had more stories to tell than anyone, and you wouldn’t change careers if you were paid to.
At the venue the following day, you had received word from the stage director that the band was running behind, and they needed you both to grab food and coffees for all of them. Typically, you’d roll your eyes at this, but you didn’t immediately, as you knew life happened, and it could’ve happened for a lot of reasons. You had gone and grabbed the guys their Chinese food while Iz picked up the Starbucks order, and arrived back at the theater just before the band did.
They came in, all looking rather tired and irritated. Noah was the last to enter, baseball hat on his head and wearing basketball shorts under his large hoodie.
“All I’m saying is, I don’t know how you had no idea the window would break.” The man who you recognized to be Jolly was still lecturing Noah as they came in, dropping their bags down.
You and Isobel were in the back of the room, speaking with the crew who were preparing to bring in the instruments and equipment. You planned to help unload it all, so you were listening to the stage director instruct them on where to place everything.
“It was a stress ball! Why would I think it would break the window?!”
“Because it was hard?” Folio piped up as he sat down, tearing into the food.
“Look, it’s not a huge deal. Safelite said they can have it fixed before tomorrow. It’ll be fine!”
You shook your head, sincerely wondering what the hell they were talking about. Your attention, however, was pulled back to Isobel. You followed her out to the truck where the loading ramp was being pulled down.
“You going to talk to him?” She asked as she began pulling a mic stand out. You grabbed one of the smaller amps, and followed her back to the delivery door.
“Probably not. We’ve got a lot to do.”
“I mean,” She set the stand down and looked over to where the band sat, apparently still arguing amongst themselves, and looked back at you. “you could go talk to him now? I can unload this with the guys.”
“I need to earn my paycheck too, Iz.”
“Why don’t you want to talk to him?”
You stopped walking away, turning to look at her. “I never said that.”
“So go talk to him? He’s just a guy.”
You sighed, narrowing your eyes at her. “Fine, I will.”
Stomping back toward the couches of the green room, you heard her laugh behind you. It wasn’t any big deal, you didn’t see why she was bugging you about this. You inhaled a big breath, and walked straight up to the group, noticing they were all now sat and eating.
“Hey guys.” You waved a hand at them. “I don’t mean to bug you while you’re eating. I just wanted to introduce myself. I’ll be one of your VA’s for the evening. If you need anything at all, or have any preferences I should be aware of, please don’t hesitate to ask.”
They all set their food down and stood, pushing their hands out for you to shake. You took each one gracefully, hearing them tell you their names, which you already knew.
The last to introduce himself was Noah, who, while leaning over the table to take your grasp, knocked a bottle of soy sauce down, causing you to jump back. It was too late, and your dark blue jeans had black splatter on them.
“Fuck! I’m so sorry!”
You grabbed a napkin and patted at the spots quickly, waving. “No, it’s okay. It shouldn’t stain.” Hopefully.
Nicholas grabbed a roll of paper towels from the back table and cleaned it up quickly, smiling sheepishly at you. “You’ll have to excuse Noah. He’s as clumsy as they come.”
Noah smacked a hand at his shoulder. “Not true, dick.” He looked back up at you apologetically. “Again, I’m so sorry.”
Moving around the table to approach him, you took his hand. “It’s really no problem.”
“I didn’t catch your name?” You gave it to him, and he smiled brightly at you. “That’s different?”
Smirking, you nodded. “It is. You can just call me Cross.”
For a second, you weren’t sure he was going to get it. His hand continued shaking yours for an unnecessarily long time while his brow furrowed, staring at you. After a moment, he cocked his head to the side.
“Cross…” He strung the word out on his tongue. “As in…” You could actually see the light bulb go off behind his eyes, and they popped open wide.
“Oh shit!” His hand let go of yours, and suddenly he was grabbing you by the forearms, startling you a bit. “No fucking way!”
He was smiling way bigger than you expected, but in that smile, you saw that same goofy guy that used to sit with you for hours, chatting online and dicking around.
“I wasn’t sure you’d remember.” You grinned back at him, trying to push down the little bit of butterflies that started trying to scoot their way into your chest.
You noticed how his face fell just slightly when you said it, likely remembering quite how long it had been. “Of course I remember.” His voice was even, but he still looked enthused.
“Well, it’s good to finally meet you.”
He looked up and down at you, taking a step back for effect. “Yeah, same here. I guess you aren’t a fifty year old dude after all.”
Your face flushed at that, and you shook your head. “Nope. Sorry to disappoint.”
“Care to introduce?” Jolly stood behind you, and you turned to see him stand with a raised eyebrow.
Noah took the initiative to push you slightly toward the rest of the band.
“You guys remember when I used to stream all the time? And I had that one chick who used to join every day and chat with me for hours? She was the one who used to tell people I was a Billie Eilish fan page.” He looked down at you with an eyebrow raised, and you broke out in hard laughter.
“Well, you practically were, Noah!”
He shook his head, turning to tower over you. “I was not! I just like her music!”
Folio stood up, smiling wide. “Oh, dude I remember that! Didn’t she hack into your account and change your profile photo and everything?”
Noah glared down at you, which caused a whole new fit of giggles to erupt.
“What?! It got you more subs!”
He rolled his eyes and pulled your arm, moving you to sit on the couch next to him.
“How have you been?” He shoved a mouthful of chow mein and spoke around his food. “I know it’s been a while, I’m sorry.”
You just shook your head. “No need to apologize. You’ve been busy.”
He beamed at that. “Have you heard the new album?”
“I have. It’s really great.”
“You think? I appreciate that.”
You sat back, watching how he inhaled the food in front of him. “Also, I’ve been good. Also keeping busy.”
Wiping his mouth on a napkin, he nodded. “This is what you do? Full time?”
“Yeah, been doing it a while. I like it.”
He leaned back also, arms falling into his lap. The other guys had began to disperse, heading to different parts of the building to begin their preparations.
"That's cool."
The conversation fell silent between you both, and you cleared your throat. "Well, it's really good to see you, Noah."
He affirmed with a nod, chewing on his lip. "I feel bad for not keeping in touch."
"Oh stop. You had no way to reach me other than Twitch."
"That's true. I don't have social media anymore, either." He shrugged his shoulders.
"Yeah, I saw that."
The quiet was strange and uncomfortable, and you decided not to stall your job any longer. "Well, I'd better get back to work."
He stood too, bumping into your shoulder as he did, nearly knocking you back into the couch. Instantly, his hand reached out to grab you.
"Shit!" He exclaimed, and in his attempt to hook your arm, his hand missed, and grabbed a full hand of your right breast.
A sharp gasp tumbled out of you, and he pulled his hand back with haste, causing you to lose your balance again, and fall backward, the back of your head smacking the arm of the couch.
"Damn it!" He crouched down to grab you, but your hand came up in front of you.
"Uhm," You squeezed your eyes closed, clearing the spots that formed in your vision. "I got it."
Sitting up, you rubbed at the back of your head. He sat down again, keeping about a foot of distance between you.
"I'm so fucking sorry."
Your eyes opened, seeing the look of absolute shame and guilt painted on his face. It was comical.
What a fucking doofus.
"Noah," You turned your head back and forth to assess if your neck was injured. It wasn't. "I think your clumsiness is spreading."
His face fell in his hands. "I'm so sorry." He apologized again, groaning loudly. "I don't know what's wrong with me today!"
"Everyone has off days." You assured, taking a moment before you stood back up.
"Not like today. I broke a window in the tour bus this morning, that's why we were late."
Your mouth fell open. "You broke the window?"
"I didn't mean to! I had one of those squishy stress-ball things? It was real firm, cause it was new. So I was trying to soften it up by squeezing it, and I thought, maybe if I bounced it a few times, it would get softer..."
Your eyebrows shot up in disbelief. "You didn't..."
"I just tossed it gently and the fucking thing broke a hole clean out of the window!"
Maybe it was the near-concussion or the obscenity of it all, but a guttural laughter came out of you, making you fall back onto the couch clutching your sides.
"It's not funny!" Noah tried to argue, but ended up laughing with you, his bravado deflating.
"Ah, Noah," You wiped the tears spilling from your eyes. "you really haven't changed."
After your unfortunate accident earlier, Noah had insisted on exchanging numbers with you, so he could check in and make sure you were okay throughout the night. This was after he failed to convince you to go get checked out at an ER, and swore him to not tell anyone what happened. The last thing you needed was an incident in the workplace.
Noah was half an hour from going onstage, and you were on the side stage, checking the battery level of all of the microphones. Your phone buzzed in your back pocket and you rolled your eyes. It had been nearly constant for the last three hours.
Noah: Checking in. How's the head?
You sighed, typing a quick response.
You: Same as it was twenty minutes ago - normal.
Noah: Any pain?
You: No.
That wasn't entirely true. You had a dull throbbing at the base of your skull, but you were doing a great job of ignoring it.
Noah: Okay. Where are you?
You: Stage left. I'm covering you and Folio tonight, so I'm checking the mics and making sure all your stuff is ready.
Noah: Cool. Need any help?
You: Shouldn't you be getting ready?
Noah: Yeah, probably.
You snickered, staring at your screen before sending the next message.
You: If I didn't know better, I'd think you concussed me just to ask me for my number.
It was stupid, but you couldn't help but fuck with him a little bit. His response came quickly.
Noah: Maybe I did. ;P
You scowled down at the phone. What the hell?
His type bubble appeared quickly, another message coming in.
Noah: Wait, that sounded creepy. I'm kidding, I swear.
You: Suuuuuuure
He read that message, but didn't respond. You had definitely caught him a little off-guard and it made you laugh. You stared down at the winking face emoji, and it dawned on you that he was flirting with you. You visibly shivered, somewhat stunned.
Noah Sebastian was tall, dark, and sexy in almost every video and interview you had watched of him since he went dark over a year ago...but inside, it appeared he was still just as dorky and uncoordinated as you always knew him to be. You didn't realize it was quite this bad, however.
And not only was he clumsy, he was bad at flirting too...
You shook off the feeling, trying your hardest not to smile at the thought. Despite the ickiness of it all, you were flattered. He may be kind of Scooby-Doo-ish, but he was handsome, and talented. He also had a soft, deep side of him that you had the pleasure of seeing on more than one occasion.
Maybe he was just nervous? Maybe you could just go with it and see how it turned out?
You resolved to push it to the back of your mind for the time being, placing yourself back into your professional work mindset as the show began.
Noah was entirely different on stage, completely in control and flowing effortlessly through the songs. He looked like an entirely different person out there. He would pop back to the sides here and there to get some water, switch out his mic, or wipe the sweat from his face. Each time, he'd give you a look of concern, and ask about your head again. You would just shush him and push him back out onto the stage.
You were also covering Folio, who was up on the riser, beating away at his drum set. The stairs you had to climb were tall, and after the third trip up here, you felt the room tilt like it was turning on it's side. You held the railing, catching Folio's eye as the darkened room began lighting up again.
He mouthed at you a quick 'You good?' and you just nodded, throwing him a thumbs up, and heading back down the stairs. Noah was stood, gulping his water, and staring at you.
"I saw that. What's wrong?"
You shook your head. "Nothing, go, the next song is starting."
He pressed a hand into your shoulder, now looking much more stern than worried. "I don't care. Are you okay?"
Still trying to brush it off, you grabbed hold of his arm, trying to push him away. It didn't occur to you that it was also instinctive, as your feet were starting to feel a little numb. "Noah, you don't have time for this."
He stood square in front of you, eyebrows raised and arms crossed over his chest.
"Are. You. Okay?" He enunciated each word, but he suddenly started to look so much taller than he did a second ago. And when did he become so fuzzy?
Your hand squeezed where it was hooked onto his bicep in an attempt to stop the inevitable, but, unfortunately, before he could manage to reach for you, the room went dark.
Your eyes cracked open, a harsh light shining in them, and you squinted against it.
"Hey, you with us?" A blonde man you didn't recognize stared down at you, a stethoscope around his neck and gloves on his hands.
A paramedic. Amazing.
When you looked around, you realized you were on a gurney, sitting in the back of an ambulance with the doors open, in the parking lot of the venue. It was the paramedic that was on call at the theater that night.
"Ugh, no fucking way." You tried to sit up, but a hand pressed onto your shoulder. You shifted your eyes to see Isobel sitting on the bench next to the stretcher. "Iz? What happened?"
The EMT spoke for her, putting his light back in his shirt pocket, and began moving his fingers back and forth in front of your face for you to follow.
"Well, you passed out, and cracked your head on the floor pretty good." You squeezed your eyes closed in frustration. "Big guy in there told us you hit your head earlier, too? That's probably what caused you to faint."
Yeah. Big, dumb, gargantuan guy.
"My head hurts." You winced as the medic turned your neck, checking your range of motion.
"I'm sure it does. You're all intact, it appears, but given that this was the second impact today, I strongly suggest going to the ER to get a scan."
You rolled your eyes, trying again to sit up. "I don't think-"
Isobel cut you off. "We're going."
The EMT nodded, and reached to begin shutting the doors. Admitting defeat, you carefully laid your head back down. The vehicle started moving and you let out a hard breath.
"We're so not getting paid for tonight."
Iz laughed, shaking her head. "I think it'll be fine. Noah was in a near panic attack when he moved you to the couch. Kept saying it was all his fault."
You snickered. "Kind of is."
"He wanted to cancel the rest of the show, but I told him you'd have a full stroke if he did that because of you."
Your eyes popped open, and you tried to sit up. "He didn't do that, did he?!"
The EMT pressed you back down. "Easy, easy."
Isobel patted your shoulder. "No, he didn't."
You melted back onto the bed. "Oh thank fuck for that."
The ride to the Emergency Room was short, and the nurses made quick work of getting you into a rollable bed and carting you off to get a CT scan of your head and neck. That was mundane, but they had given you something decent for the pain, so it wasn't so bad. You hummed to yourself as you were rolled back to your room, and Isobel was missing. You whipped your head around, looking to see if she was anywhere to be found, but a voice came from the opposite side.
"She went to get a snack."
Noah stood by the doorway, hands in the pockets of his cargo pants, white t-shirt on, and a beanie over his hair. He had cleaned up since the show, you could tell.
"The show is over already?"
He huffed out a laugh, stepping over to the end of your bed. "Yeah, for a little while now. You've been at the hospital for two hours."
You raised your eyebrows, but it didn't phase you too much. "Time flies when you're on morphine, I suppose."
His hands gripped the rails at the end of the bed. "How you doing?"
You nodded, sinking against the mattress. "I mean, I've been better, but I've been worse."
He lifted an eyebrow at you, and moved to perch himself on the very edge of the end of the bed. "Yeah? That's...better than nothing?"
You nodded, looking him up and down. He looked more like himself in this outfit, and you liked it. It felt more genuine.
"How did the rest of the show go?"
He shrugged his shoulders, hands still in his pockets. "Good, I guess. I was stressed, so I felt like I kind of rushed through it."
You brought your arms up behind your head, getting comfortable. "You shouldn't have. I'm good."
Noah deadpanned at you. "Obviously you weren't. You should've gone to the hospital earlier."
You scoffed. "Oh well. Doesn't matter now."
He was leaned over, his shoulder pulled in and he looked nervous.
"What's wrong?"
"What?" He looked bewildered.
"You look upset or something?"
He snickered, readjusting his feet on the floor. "Well, I gave you a concussion, couldn't convince you to get checked out and agreed not to tell anyone, which led to you getting an even worse concussion, and you're now potentially bleeding into your brain... That's probably got something to do with it."
You waved a hand at him. "Details. It's not a big deal."
He shook his head, looking at the wall adjacent from him and not at you. "This is not how I pictured us getting to meet."
This interested you, so you probed. "You pictured us meeting?"
He smirked. "We talked for a couple years, Cross. Of course I did."
"And how was that supposed to go?" High or not, you were curious.
He chuckled, still not looking at you. "Not like this."
You rolled your eyes. "Well, duh. But what did you expect?"
"I don't know. Something normal? Hanging at a movie or getting food? Like normal people?"
You cackled. "Well, you're not normal, Noah."
"Clearly." He said through grit teeth.
Leaning back again, you relaxed, and pursed your lips. "Were you trying to flirt with me earlier?"
You could tell this caught him by surprise, as he began looking nervous again. "What do you mean?"
"Well, either your were trying to flirt, or you actually gave me a concussion just to get my phone number."
He bit back a laugh, looking at you sheepishly. "Yeah, no that wasn't on purpose. Just a bad joke."
"Well, you could've just asked for my number, is all I'm saying."
He shook with soft laughter. "Noted." He stood then, turning toward the doorway where Isobel could be seen coming down the hallway. "Well, I mostly wanted to make sure you were okay. I should go."
Something about that didn't feel right to you, and you sat up a little quickly, your brain sloshing slightly in your skull, but you ignored it.
"You're leaving?" In your inebriated mind, you pictured yourself looking silly and desperate, but your logic knew that likely was just the drugs talking.
“Yeah, well, you don’t need a disaster magnet hanging around.” He said looking timid.
Isobel had joined you back in the bedroom, and was turning to look between the both of you.
“Everything okay?” She stared at Noah, and he reached a hand to palm the back of his neck.
“Yeah, I was just getting ready to head out.”
Your mouth moved before you could stop it. “No he wasn’t.”
Both of their heads snapped to look up at you, and he looked so puzzled. “No?”
You shook your head, soft smile adorning your face. “No, not unless you have somewhere to be.”
Isobel picked up on the tension in the room and made a show to look at her smart watch.
“Oh damn, look at that, I’m getting a call. Be right back.”
She slipped from the room and Noah focused his stare back on you.
“You want me to stay?”
You nodded, crossing your legs in front of you and sitting straight.
“That could be hazardous, you know?” He joked, but rounded back around by the bed, sitting a little closer to you on the edge.
“I don’t care.”
It took what felt like forever for the doctor to finally enter the room, interrupting yours and Noah’s game of hot hands you were playing while Iz sat in a chair on the side, chatting idly about the next gig she had booked for Motionless in White.
“Ah, I see your coordination is no issue.” The doctor spoke right as your hand came down to slap the back of Noah’s hard, forcing him to pull away hastily and hiss in pain.
You giggled, and turned to face the physician. “How’s my head?” He looked down at his paperwork, nodding in approval. Noah moved off the bed so the doctor could come around and shine a light at your eyes for the hundredth time.
“Looks good. No bleeds, no fractures. You shouldn’t have any lasting side effects aside from some headaches for a few days.” You smiled and glanced at Noah, seeing the physical relief he breathed out.
“You need to follow up with a neurologist in one week, and you need to stay in bed for at least five days.”
You grunted in disapproval. “That sucks.”
He sucked his teeth. “I know, but it’s just a precaution. Do you live with someone? Parents? Roommate? Boyfriend?”
If Noah were a dog, his ears would have been perking at that last word.
You shook your head. “Just me.”
He shrugged. “I don’t like the idea of you being alone. Can you stay with someone until you can go to the neurologist?”
I sunk down. “Not really? I have a cat that needs to be looked after.”
“I can come stay with you.” Isobel spoke up from her side of the bed, and I smiled at her appreciatively.
“Okay, good. I think I can get you out of here, then. No blood thinners for a few days, just Tylenol for pain. You experience any odd symptoms or pain that’s unbearable, you come straight back, yes?”
You nodded, and he smiled.
“Great, I’ll put in for the discharge.”
You turned to look at her, reaching out for her to take your hand. “You didn’t have to do that, Iz.”
She smirked. “Someone has to.”
You laughed. “Yeah, I guess so.”
“Can we just stop by my place? I’ve got a couple things I need to do, it’ll take a couple hours, probably. Or I can drop you off and head back over?”
“She shouldn’t be alone, though, right?” Noah piped up from where he stood on the opposing side of the bed.
You sighed. “I’m so tired though. I want to go home and get in my sweats.”
He pursed his lips, mind working while looking at your face, before glancing back up to Isobel.
“Why don’t I take her home, and I can hang with her till you get there? That way you can do what you need to, but she can go home and get comfortable?”
Isobel eyed you, wanting to hear your thoughts on it before she answered. You just shrugged in response, and she slowly tore her eyes off of you to look back at Noah.
“Alright, but be careful driving her home.” She smiled in a patronizing fashion. “You can understand my hesitation after today.”
He clenched his jaw, knowing exactly what she meant, and looked back down at you. You felt your cheeks heat up under his gaze.
His eyes fell back to Iz, that sternness returning in his tone.
“I‘ll be careful.”
The drive back to your apartment was silent, the air hanging with uncertainty. The only sound above the whir of the motor was you giving directions to your place, and Noah humming his understanding.
It took until you were over halfway there for him to look at you, eyes looking sad.
“Feel like the morphine’s wearing off?”
You were rubbing at your temples, and you snorted. “How could you tell?”
He smirked. “I’m so sorry.”
You groaned. “Noah, if you apologize one more time, I’m going to slap you.”
He sucked his lips in and looked back out the windshield.
“It wasn’t your fault, it happens.”
His knuckles flexed on the steering wheel and he inhaled a long breath. "It's actually, technically, one hundred percent my fault." He admitted, gritting his teeth.
He pulled into the parking lot of your apartment complex, and his vehicle came to a stop just outside of your building.
"I don't suppose you live on the first floor?" He chanced, but you shook your head.
"Third." He looked like he was about to start stressing, but you smiled. "There's an elevator."
This made him relax back in his seat before he stepped out, moving quickly to your side and letting you out.
He carried your bag and sweater in his arms as you led up to the elevator, and down the hall to your small one-bedroom apartment. Once inside, your white, short-haired cat bound up to you both, meowing with fervor.
Noah looked down at her, and back up to you. You reached down and scooped up her small body with one hand, holding her to your chest.
"Noah, this is Narcissa."
He smiled, petting her head with one finger, which she accepted graciously.
"She's probably starving, I'd better feed her." Before you could move toward the kitchen, he put a hand on your arm.
"Let me. Where's her food?"
You pointed him in the right direction, taking the moment to head into your bedroom, kicking your shoes off and reaching for a t-shirt from the closet and a pair of shorts from the drawer of your long dresser. He appeared in the doorway right after you had slipped the shirt over your head, and he leaned against the frame.
"She's fed. Anything I can get you?"
You panned around the room, thinking for a moment. "I've got some chips and salsa in the kitchen. Chips in the pantry and salsa in the fridge. Want to grab it and meet me in the living room?"
He nodded, heading to complete his task. You padded over to the couch, dropping down onto the soft cushions, and pulled your sofa blanket over you. He joined you after a moment, setting the food on the coffee table, your phone next to it.
"Thought you'd want that."
He sat and watched the television as you flipped through Hulu, looking for something to watch. You could feel how uncomfortable he was, trying so hard to keep a wide distance from you, likely so as not to hurt you.
"Noah?"
He looked over, eyebrows raised. "Hmm?"
You made a show of relaxing back on the couch, and motioned for him to do the same. "Take a breath. I'm fine."
He tried, leaning back and exhaling loudly. "You okay with Evil Dead? It's one of my favorites."
"Sure. I've seen it a couple times."
You sat back, now munching on some chips, and offered him the bag. He grabbed some, crunching on them loudly.
The movie played, but you could feel how, as he finally did begin to relax, he was moving somewhat closer to you. It was fascinating. He wasn't doing it on purpose, it was almost as if he was a magnet, and you were the pole it attached to.
"Can I ask you a question?" He looked over at you, listening. "Why did you go dark?"
You could see he was baffled by the so off-topic ask, and he took a moment to gather his thoughts.
"Uh," He looked back at you. "A lot of reasons, really."
"Mm." You nodded, setting the chips back on the table. "Why did you go dark on me?"
This caught his complete attention, and his body turned to face you. "What?"
"You didn't even say bye or anything. You just...stopped coming online. And I had no way to reach out."
He furrowed his brow. "I'm a little surprised you wanted to, Cross."
"Why?"
He made a noise that sounded nearly annoyed. "Well, you never wanted to talk on a call. You never showed your face. You wouldn't even tell me your real name."
Guilt sunk in to your gut, reminding you that he was absolutely right.
"I just figured you weren't interested in maintaining the friendship beyond what it was, so I didn't think about it."
You nodded, understanding. There was nothing wrong with it, but it still sort of hurt your feelings.
"I get it. I was just curious."
"Why didn't you ever reach out?"
You opened your mouth to respond, but had to stop, because you realized...you didn't know. There wasn't a clear, concise reason why. Maybe you liked the idea of Noah being just an idea? A friend? Someone who didn't know you, and all that came with? Maybe it made it easier to feel safe talking to him?
He noticed you were uncomfortable with the conversation, and waved it off. "It doesn't matter now."
You had to agree with that. It wasn't going to change anything.
"Well, let's just watch the movie and you can rest."
You leaned back on the couch, and it wasn't lost on you that Noah was slowly scooting closer still, only now, you were pretty sure he was doing it on purpose. The room felt warm, and you adjusted under the blanket to kick a leg out, it being pressed against his. His eyes darted down to where you had touched him, and back up to your face. You kept your eyes straight ahead, smirking at the situation.
He leaned forward, pulling his beanie off and running his hand through his hair. "Is it warm in here?"
You smiled, just dropping your shoulders. He leaned back, and tried so desperately to smoothly slip an arm on the back of the couch, stretching at the same time.
He wasn't actually doing this, was he?
He was adorable, despite how absolutely ridiculous he was. He was nervous, and you knew that, but you worked overtime to hide your amusement, just shifting so you were pressed into his side.
His hand hesitated on the back of the couch, twitching as if he wanted to just wrap it around your shoulders, your head now resting on his chest.
You sighed loudly. "Noah, just put your arm around me."
"Yup." He gripped you, and adjusted to curl into him closer, leg falling over his. You giggled at him, and he pressed his face into the top of your head, embarrassed. "Clearly, I'm not good at this."
The movie played on, and at the scarier parts, you gripped his shirt tightly. You weren't very spooked, but it was what you did when snuggling on the couch with a cute boy, so you just went with it.
"Cross?" His voice was small, and you pressed in closer to hear him better.
"Hmm?"
"I really want to kiss you, but I'm kind of," He cleared his throat. "afraid?"
You scrunched up your nose and lifted your face to look at him. "Afraid?" His eyes were so big and doe-like, it pulled at something in your chest.
"Yeah, after all that's happened today? What if I miss and...I don't know...break your nose, or something?"
It took a second, but your face broke out in a large grin and you started laughing like a hyena. It was so absurd.
"What?!"
You had to take a breath, the ache in your head beginning to throb a little harder with your labored breathing. "I'm sorry!" You squeaked out, trying to contain yourself.
"Is it that hard to believe?"
You shook your head. "It's not." You could barely hold the giggles in. "That's why it's so funny."
He narrowed his eyes, pulling his arm from where it was wrapped around your back, but you pushed in closer, finally halting your laughing and looked at him.
"Noah," You lifted one hand to press your palm against his cheek. "if you want to kiss me, just do it."
His eyes flipped between both of yours, considering, before he leaned in and you closed your eyes.
Problem is, so did he...
His top teeth collided into yours making a harsh clacking sound, and causing you both to pull away hastily.
"God damn it!" His hand pressed into his gums, and he stared at you. "Are you okay?" You were laughing again, and he growled. "Maybe we should just not even try."
The tears in your eyes glistened, making him look glittery in your vision, and you just smiled brightly at him.
"Fucking hell, Noah."
You lifted yourself up, grabbing his face, and pressing your mouth to his, this time without incident. Your lips molded to his, and you felt him let out a breath he had been holding. His hands cautiously grabbed you, gently moving you to position so you straddled him, lips not disconnecting as he did.
Your hands gripped his hair, pulling his head back and exposing his neck. Your lips went to work laying featherlike kisses on the soft skin when you heard his voice.
"Uhm, Cross?" He was out of breath, and his chest was heaving. "We probably shouldn't do anything too crazy, on account of the concussion." His voice sounded unconvinced, but still, you pulled back, raising an eyebrow at him.
"My brain is fine. Now, let me have some fun, for fucking once."
His fingers dug into your sides, and your tongue was tracing his tattoos on the side of his throat.
"B-But, I really don't know if we should. The doctor said-"
You pulled back again, this time becoming annoyed. "The doctor said I needed to stay in bed. This counts."
"Okay, but, what if it makes it worse?"
You deflated a bit, hands falling down onto your lap. "Do you not want to do this?" Your voice had cracked just slightly, and you silently cursed yourself for it.
His eyes bulged, and he grabbed you harder. "No, I do! I really, really do. I just don't want to hurt you."
Even with the concern and empathy in his voice, you couldn't help but grind down onto his hips, noticing his pants were significantly tighter, and pull a moan straight out of his chest.
"You won't Noah. At least, not in a bad way." You wiggled your brows at him and gripped the sides of his neck.
He looked confused. "Is there a good way?" Incredulously, you dropped your forehead on his chest, his mind catching up a second later. "Oh! Oh right! Sorry, I don't know where my mind is right now."
You just kissed him again, tired of talking - or whatever that was - about it. Noah lifted his hips to push into you, which was the first thing he had done right all evening. You felt his erection beneath the layers of fabric between you, the friction delicious against your crotch. This time, he began placing soft kisses on your neck, barely touching the skin and teasing you.
His fingers loosened around your hips and wandered up to your shirt, slipping underneath and goosebumps rose on your skin where he touched. His hands found your breasts and took them in handfuls.
You couldn't help but giggle at the memory that flashed through your head, which caused him to look up at you.
"What?"
You smiled down at him. "Nothing, it's just that you grabbed my chest earlier when you tried to catch me. I was just thinking, I like this better."
He sighed, his head falling back. "I was hoping you hadn't noticed that."
You kissed him again, pressing back down on him, and regaining his attention.
"Noah?" His eyes looked at yours, his body now rhythmically pressing into you. "Fuck me? Please?"
You didn't mean to sound quite so needy, but it just came out that way. You were aching so bad for it, and you felt as if he didn't slip inside you soon, you may explode.
His eyes darkened, and he smiled back at you, his arms flexing around your waist and lifting you gently to lay you down on the couch. Hands making quick work of your shorts, pulling them off and staring at you. You may have forgotten to put panties on when you changed earlier, so he was marveling at the sight in front of him.
His tongue darted out to lick his lips before he pulled his own pants and boxers down, exposing his cock. You were impressed. Where Noah lacked grace and technique, he made up elsewhere. He slipped his hand into his pocket, fishing his wallet out. He located the condom quickly and applied it, giving himself a few long strokes as his free hand slid down your stomach, fingertips running through your folds for a second.
"You're sure it won't hurt you?" His mouth was hung open, and you rolled your eyes in response.
You reached your arms up, grabbing at him and pulling him down toward you. He fell forward with you, and his hand came down hard on the edge of the coffee table by mistake. He pulled it back, yelping.
"Fuck!" He shook out his hand, and you grabbed his face, forcing him to look at you.
"It's okay. Just look at me." Doing as he was told, his dick pressed against your entrance, nudging for approval.
You rocked your hips up, assisting him as he slipped partially inside of you. The stretch burned incredibly, your eyes rolling back with it.
"Oh, wow." Your words were just breaths, arms wrapping around his neck. "T-That's...wow."
Noah's hips pulled back before snapping forward, driving into you with force. Your body shook with the feeling, clenching down around him. His lips were pressing kisses into the skin on your jaw and collarbone, adding to the lovely sensation.
"Holy fuck, Noah." You lifted your legs to lock around his waist, pushing your hips up. "Harder."
He rammed your body into the cushions, the back of the couch smacking the wall loudly.
"J-Jesus. So good." His words were so quiet, you almost didn't hear. His face was buried in your neck, sweat forming in his hair. "You're so tight."
His whispers were pushing you off the edge. "Ugh, keep talking to me." Your hands gripped his hair, pulling at the roots.
"Fucking can't take it, it's so good. So perfect. So wet." He was railing you so hard, you felt as though you may cry from the sensation. "Just want to stay buried inside you all night, baby."
His words came out so softly, so soothingly that you let your body relax and let go, orgasm ready to tip.
That is, until...
"Ow..." It was almost silent. "Oww..." That was louder. "Ow! Ouch! Fuck!" He sat up suddenly, falling back on the couch.
You sat up, your head still spinning. "What's wrong?!" Your hands wandered over him, but he lifted his leg up on the couch, gripping his calf.
"Fucking leg cramp." His fingers pressed into the visibly tight muscle, and you fell backward, orgasm officially lost.
"I'm sorry!" He tried to reach for you, but you lifted your head, shooting him a warning glance. He pulled back, face turning a deep shade of red.
His cock, however, was stood at full attention still.
Rolling your tongue around in your mouth, you swung your legs off the couch and stood. You pointed to the cushions, and demanded him. "Lay down."
Without hesitation, he did as he was told, laying flat on his back, and stared at you longingly.
Wasting no time, you sat down, sliding onto him with ease now that you'd had a chance to adjust. The angle made you feel so full, so satiated. You let out a long, comfortable moan.
His hands grabbed you, and you began to rock back and forth, begging to chase that lost climax. He peered up at you through half-masked lids, fingers gripping your thighs now.
"Is that better, baby?" You nodded, fingernails scratching down his chest. "Going to come this way? Make a mess all over me?"
Just like Noah was on stage, when he was fucking, he liked to be in control. He was good at it, too.
You nodded, pressing your clit into the skin of his pubic bone. The friction combined with the pressure he was putting on that spot inside you had your thrusts more erratic.
"Can't last like this, honey. You're going to make me come if you keep riding me so fucking good."
His hips were rocking up into you, finding the wave you were riding and helping it wash over you.
"Noah..." You whimpered, hands digging into the skin of his sides. "I'm going to come."
"Yeah, baby, come for me."
His voice, so deep, raspy, sultry, shoved you over that edge, your body slowing down and spasming around him. His hips only had to buck up two more times before he was groaning, leaving fingerprint bruises in your thighs.
You both stayed still, breathing heavily, staring at each other. A grin creeped up onto your face slowly, a matching expression on his.
Both lost in your own universe, neither of you had heard the front door unlocking...
"Hey! I got finished quicker than I expected, so I-"
Both of your heads whipped to the front door, where Isobel had stepped in, duffel bag on her arm and food bags in the other.
"Jesus fucking Christ!" She turn around, covering her eyes with her hand. "What the fuck!"
You and Noah promptly jumped together, scrambling to right yourselves. He pulled at his pants that were still wrapped around his ankles, and you grabbed the blanket from the couch. He sat upright on the sofa, and you pressed against him, pulling the blanket over yourself.
Mortified, you both waited for her to turn around, which she did, eventually.
"Sorry about that, Iz." You said as you interlaced your fingers with Noah's, who was using his other hand to fully cover his face in humiliation.
"Not what I was expecting to see today!" She squealed, walking past the couch toward the kitchen. "I have food, you fucking pervs."
Once she had left the living room, you and Noah looked up at each other, both blushing furiously at having been caught in the act.
Even with the added mishap, you both broke out into large, shining smiles, laughing at the situation.
What a fucking doofus.
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Gay Cheerleaders AU
Y'all knew it was coming.
I'm thinking Lena would be the... third(?) year veteran, who is a legacy. Her mom Lillian was also a cheerleader, and then became the head honcho in charge of the cheerleading division. Lena grew up with the expectation of eventually joining the organization as a dancer, and naturally becomes a group leader (the youngest 1st group leader in the history of the organization?) through her sense of responsibility, magnetism, and compassion, even if she remains a little distant-- she doesn't share her whole self with the team, as she's constantly aware of needing to present the image of a perfect cheerleader, a perfect leader.
Kara would be the rookie, immediately awed by Lena's performance during tryouts. She's not in Lena's group, but her own group leader faces some... personality challenges, lets say, that have Kara taking on more of a responsibility than would normally be allocated to a first year dancer.
But when Kara and Lena end up bumping into each other in the studio for some solo practice, they agree to share the space and work together. Of course they end up bonding, and those practices lead to coffees, lunches, some movie nights.
They eventually become the darlings of the team, inseperably so. Young fans try to catch glimpses of them standing together on the sidelines, loving to see Kara acting herself (aka goofy) and seeing Lena laughing in response. Behind the scenes they become romantically and sexually involved, but they keep it hidden because while it's not explicitly forbidden, they do cheer for a very conservative state, and they know it would impact not only their squad but the team overall.
In their day jobs, Lena is a children's dance teacher-- she wants to do more, but Lillian wants it for the community-service image it presents. Kara would be a fitness trainer I think, something lucrative but flexible and reflective of her athletic and exuberant nature whereas Lena is a bit more reserved.
Kara and Lena span multiple seasons/classes, and in the off season Lena pops up on Kara's instagram a little bit here and there, which only fuels the quiet online rumors about them. Like, the people who clock them are also queer in a conservative region of the country, so it's not a mass pop-culture phenomenon-- yet.
That all changes when one night Lena is grabbed inappropriately by a cameraman or other stadium employee, and can't manage to extricate herself despite her obvious and vocal discomfort. Kara sees red. She slugs the man right across the jaw with a proper right hook. The cameras had only just started to pan over to Lena's commotion and catches the exact moment Kara lunges for him and spins Lena out of his reach.
Kara is the champion/brute of the moment, depending on who's talking. Some laud her for both her protectiveness of her teammate and her technique, while others condemn her for unladylike vigilantism. Why didn't she let the security team deal with it, she serves a role model for young girls what is she teaching them the thug life?
Most importantly-- and most dire, perhaps-- is that it clues Lillian into the deeper nature of their relationship. She corners Lena, and interrogates her as Lena tries and tries to deflect. Lillian all but tells her that she'll be watching Lena through a microscope, and terrifies Lena to the point she breaks up with Kara in an attempt to protect her tenure with the organization.
Kara doesn't really care about all that, but when Lena says it's what she wants, she respects that. Until the team goes to the superbowl, and in the height of emotions at the winning touchdown, Lena forgets herself and throws her arms around Kara's neck and kisses her.
She's stunned at herself, horrified even, but before she can even try to apologize Kara recovers and kisses her again, this time long and slow. The cameras not on the players or stadium stands are focused on them, and the next day and weeks they are the only ones anyone can talk about, for better or worse.
Lillian uses Lena's next year, her fifth and final, as leverage. Apologize publicly for her lapse in judgement, confirm it was only ever friendship, condemn Kara for assault-- or she's out.
Lena listens calmly, then smoothly rises.
"Then I'm out."
She walks out without a second glance.
#supercorp#gay cheerleaders au#american football cheerleading is bizarre#but interesting#obvs this story would also be a commentary on the harm the industry does to its girls#and lena walking away would be a huge victory on so many level#inspired/informed by the dallas cowboys cheeleader documentary on netflix
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