#VERSE ;; The Potions Spy Master (Golden Trio Era)

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@spellwrites said: "yeah, well, you know. all relationships have problems." Imogen, shortly after joining the Order at the start of the second war, referring to the fact that her boyfriend/almost-fiance doesn't believe the war exists. Talking to either au!alive!Lily and/or Severus // PROMPTS FROM PRACTICAL MAGIC

He can't help but roll his eyes at her comment, but mostly at the fact her idiot boyfriend doesn't believe the war exists. And here he thought that being the Potions Master at Hogwarts had helped him see all kinds of stupidity, but this was a new one. Severus raises an eyebrow at his mentee and friend, giving her a ludicrous look. "Do you need me to brew an Oculus Potion for him? Or perhaps a Wit-Sharpening Potion would be better suited? But nothing else helps like good old fashioned experience."

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Severus was taken back by her request. He was very positive that she could probably feeling the way his heart was racing in his chest now, and yet, his face remained controlled and calm. He hadn't even noticed how he hitched his breath a little before finally catching it. Lily...wanted him to sleep beside her? If it would help her and she was asking, then the answer was already obvious.

Making it to her bedroom, he carefully placed her on one side of the bed before awkwardly joining in beside her. The Potions Master felt completely out of his element here. It wasn't as if they hadn't done this before-- laying next to each other. But as adults, and with the confession of their feelings for one another, it was different from the childhood friends just enjoying each other's company. Or was it?

"It will be okay. I'll be here, watching over you. Just go to sleep." Severus wasn't sure he could fall asleep anyway with all that was happening. He was still amazed all of this was happening. And besides, he had devoted his life to protecting her now. If that meant staying awake to watch over her while she slept peacefully, then good riddance sleep. He was already use to not getting enough sleep as it was.

Oh no ... He saw the tiredness in her emerald hues. She could very well lie and say she was sleeping just fine but she knew that wouldn't be wise, he would only see straight through her. "I.. no .. " Lily admitted quietly, her smile faltering slightly. She followed along the small hallway toward the bedroom, oh how the mattress and soft pillows called to her. Yet she knew she would only be woken by the previous events, and with Harry no longer with her she didn't have anything to distract from her thoughts.

It was then that the penny dropped. Oh! How could she had been so blind? Severus was here. "I..I cannot sleep without you here with me" she admitted, taking a small step closer toward him. Lily scanned his features, "I need you . . . to be my anchor" it was true, she needed to know that when she woke up in those moments that there would be safety, a reminder for her to stay in the present. Although it had been months since the attack on Godric's Hollow, Lily was plagued by it every night.

Her fingers held onto his tighter, "I need to sleep beside you, because if I don't and I look back on the past, then I am lost Sev" She admitted still with a quieter tone, yet behind it that ache laced into her tongue, the sort that people made when they were on the verge of tears. Yet Lily did not hold water behind her eyes, what use was there to more crying? She felt safe around him, for the first time since the harrowing events, Lily was learning to trust and feel secure again. She wanted peace; and part of her soul knew that it was with the man that stood in front of her. Her best friend from when she was ten. . . Now, they were more than that, and oh, how it just felt right.

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@messrsmcrauders said: "Every time I close my eyes, I see your face. And it hurts more than anything." {For Sev from Lily - for Lily’s survival verse maybe?}

He knows he hurt her. It something that haunts him to this day, clawing away at his core of being, constantly reminding him of all the mistakes he's made. And just like always, Severus is at a loss of words for what to say when it comes to her. However, he's learned his lesson now (and the hard way), to choose his words carefully and to keep a leash on his emotions so he doesn't do it again.

"I'm sorry," he breathes out. "I didn't mean it. It was never my intention to hurt you." He suddenly feels like that sixteen year old boy, showing up outside Gryffindor Tower, wanting to fix things and make it right. He didn't think she would believe him. Why would it be any different now? But he wanted her to know that he was still remorseful for it. "You were my best friend...and I let you down."

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@uptonogoodd liked for a starter with Severus! (for Lily)

The news had spread like wildfire throughout the Wizarding Community of how Lily Potter and her son had managed to survive an attack by the Dark Lord. It was considered a miracle, but yet, Severus couldn't help thinking maybe it was some sheer good luck. It still didn't change the fact that guilt was eating away inside him, haunting his dreams and soul, knowing that he would have been responsible -- or at least-- in someway, having a part in the fact that he was the one to inform the Dark Lord of the prophecy which put that target on the Potters and almost caused Lily's death.

He was never sure he could make up for that mistake, even now, as he worked alongside Dumbledore as a member of the Order of the Phoenix and the Potions Master for Hogwarts, helping to keep an eye on Lily's son and make sure he was safe. No matter what, Severus knew it wouldn't change the fact Lily would always think the worst of him, and she had every right to. But now, seeing her after all these years since the breaking of their friendship long ago, the one thing that never changed was Severus' loyalty to her. "It's been awhile." He said, trying to break the tension. "I'm sorry...for all you've been through. If you ever need any assistance, I'm here."

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@progenyofprongs said: "It's not what it looks like." (Snape)

The Potions Master raises an eyebrow, not buying it one bit. He knows better. After all, 'the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree'...or so the saying goes. He won't be made into a fool by another Potter ever again, but he also can't help keeping an eye on the Potter children, making sure they are safe...for her, and only her. "Is that so, Miss Potter? Because, unless my eyes are playing a trick on me -- and I know they are not -- I thought I specifically told you to use your wand to stir your own potion. Not have your brother do it for you. Five points from Gryffindor for sheer laziness."

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Don't say that word. At hearing her say it, Severus had to hold back from wincing at mere sound of it being spoken from her lips. Ever since that day--his grave mistake with that word slipping through his lips had haunted him. Despite being practically numb to hearing everyone else use it, it didn't seem right coming from Lily's lips. Nor his. And he couldn't help but develop the habit of flinching every time he heard it. After all, it had hurt his best friend.

However, his calm composure was tested, hearing her speak of how he had forgiven her and was going to send an OWL to talk everything out. His black eyes went wide briefly from surprise at this. While he would have done anything Lily asked of him, he wasn't sure if he could ever forgive Potter for all he had done to him. There were some wounds that would never heal. Some that could never be forgotten.

Severus couldn't help but swallow nervously when she asked the question. Taking in a deep breath and calling forth his Occlumency skills to help control his emotions, he knew it was better to give her the truth then a sugar coated lie. "There were many reasons. I was... lost, angry, and felt betrayed by the world. I wanted purpose and control over my life. I thought I could find that joining them...but I was wrong." He pauses before continuing. "I never meant to call you that word, Lily. That day...the situation...I was-- I never wanted you to pity me or think me weak."

@potentialbreakupscng

Her eyes lifted to watch him, watching as he spoke and reaching up to wipe at the tears with the sweater she wore. There was a time when she knew what was going on in his head by just looking at him because of the crease in his brow or a slight frown on his lips. A wrinkle of his nose when he was thinking too hard about things. Things had changed drastically between the two of them -- she was too guarded. She'd found solace in the marauders, a home -- a family. Remus and Sirius were the only ones she could trust to keep an eye on Harry. Back in school, she never would have guessed that the two of them would be at such odds. That she would push him away -- because he used to be a sole source of comfort.

"I forgave you a long time ago for calling me a mudblood," she doesn't even wince when she says the word -- because it's just become a word to her, "James and I had just started talking about me sending you an owl -- to talk about stuff. Work through it." She swallowed back the quiver in her words at the mention of James, her chest aching at the reminder that he was gone. "I'm sorry. I just --" She'd been through so much -- her emotions everywhere. Her and Sirius bickered a lot more than they ever did -- and Harry was a hand full. She didn't even have the energy to be too angry with Severus or fight with him. There was too much. Her arms dropped to her stomach, falling quiet for a moment before she spoke again.

"Why?" Her voice was still quiet, her gaze remaining on the floor because she didn't really know what else to do. "Why did you join them? That's -- that's something I never understood. Calling me that name, I understood because of the people you were with. But I never thought you'd -- go that far." She looked over at him again, emerald eyes searching his face.

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🧪 veritaserum (no it's not, it's literally just aberforth's extra-strength firewhiskey. Imogen is self-aware enough to know any veritaserum she tries to brew is more liable to be poison)

"Alright, Severus, be honest with me. Do you own a single article of clothing that contains a color? Any color will do -- just one thing you wear that isn't fully grayscale. Oh, by the way, I put a truth serum in that."

SEND ME A 🧪 OR (VERITASERUM) ALONG WITH A QUESTION, FOR MY MUSE TO BE UNDER THE EFFECTS OF THE TRUTH POTION AND TO ANSWER ANY QUESTIONS THEY ARE ASKED TRUTHFULLY.

Severus takes a sip of the Firewhisky, feeling that burning sensation in his throat along with the punch of courage it offered, bringing down his guarded walls he usually had around others. He was quietly listening to her question before pausing, glancing at his drink when she admitted to putting a truth serum in it. It wasn't as if he could tell. Veritaserum was clear and odorless like water and the Firewhisky would overpower it either way. "If you wanted the truth from me, you could have just asked. And no, I don't. Black is my favorite color, but I also wear it because it is the color of mourning. Is there anything else you wish to pry out of me, Imogen?"

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@spellwrites said: ❛ I'm tired of pretending everything's okay when it's clearly not. ❜ --(for Severus) Imogen's about had it with Dumbledore keeping secrets from the Order (ex: wtf happened to his hand????) and now he's giving Severus the DADA position when everyone knows they only last a year??? People have died from that job! Why does Dumbledore think you won't be around next year!??

He wishes he could tell her everything, but he knows he can't. It's all part of the plan, after all, and important that no one knows. At least no one except for Dumbledore and himself. It still doesn't make this easy though. Severus has lost sleep completely over knowing what he must achieve at the end of this year, and between it and trying to make sure Draco Malfoy is safe and fulfulling his end of the Unbreakable Vow, it's all too much for him.

He doesn't want to do this anymore...but he has to remember his purpose for doing this--his reason. Her. Lily. It was ALWAYS her. But maybe it is about a bit more too...like protecting all the innocent people who will soon be caught up in all that is to come. People like Imogen.

Letting out a frustrated, but also painful sigh, already starting to become a pro at the lies he will have mutter and survive by. "I don't know what else to tell you. Life has it's ups and down, and it isn't fair, but after all the incompetent DADA professor's this school has had, perhaps the headmaster has seen the light and decided to finally give into my request for the role of being the DADA professor," he knew it was mostly because it's his reward for the task he will have to do by the end of this.

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@spellwrites said: "now that was me." Imogen comes clean about starting The Vampire Rumor ten years later

He should have known she was behind it. In fact, a part of Severus had his guesses that out of all his students, it would probably be Imogen. If she didn't get her way, or the answers she wanted, it wouldn't stop there.

When the rumors about him being a Vampire had started circling around the school, it didn't bother Severus. Instead it annoyed him being around the ones who obviously believed such a ridiculous notion. You could always tell who did. It was usually the students avoiding looking into his eyes even more and the ones garlic on themselves when they thought he wasn't looking. "I figured you would have been behind it all along," he sneered. "Who else would come up with such a ridiculous notion that I'm a Vampire?" he pauses, scoffing. "I had some students offering to buy me Blood-flavored lollipop's from Honeyduke's because of it..."

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He couldn't help the way it moved him to know she still cared about him after all these years. Offering a small smile -- something he hadn't done since their youth-- Severus nodded, opening his arms for her. "You may."

It felt strange to hug her again. As if it was something he shouldn't be doing or didn't deserve to do. However, the Potions Master couldn't ignore how much he missed doing so. It made it feel as if everything that happened didn't happen at all. It felt as if they were mere teenagers again with nothing coming between them to tear them apart. Severus had his arms lightly around her, letting Lily be in control of how long she chose to hug him. After a small silence, he finally broke it. "I'm sorry for what you've been through. If you need anything, just know I'm here to offer my services."

It hit a nerve in a way that surprised even Lily herself. The burst of anger was the closest she'd come to feeling anything in a very long time. Over the years she'd thought about him. Questioned his motives, allowed herself anger at how their relationship had turned out, then eventually she'd sort of circled to peace and a desire to reach out to him. So, it hurt to feel him pushing her away again.

It didn't last long, however, Lily immediately softening once he apologised. She nodded, silent for a moment as she processed his words. They soothed something inside of her, a bubble of anxiety that'd been building since the moment she'd realised she might run into him. "I care about you too." She murmured, eyes holding his gaze. "I've missed you. I've spent so much time thinking about you over the past 11 years. Thinking about what happened, thinking about what you've been doing. And I just - I wanted to see you today, maybe I wasn't admitting that to myself but I did." She hesitated for a moment. "Can I give you a hug?"

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@kingofthewebxxx said: “you can't lie to me. i can tell when you're lying” (For Snape)

Severus occluded, wondering if he happened to know about his role as a double agent or not. Surely, he didn't. Everything they did-- him and Dumbledore, was carefully crafted and planned to make sure everyone believed he had been on the Dark Lord's side all along. "I don't know to what you mean, Moriarty. Please enlighten me as to what you're referring to."

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The last person he had expected at his door was Lily Potter. Why would she be here? Wasn't she supposed to be in hiding? He had specifically remembered Dumbledore saying that the Potter's would be in hiding and have a secret keeper. "Lily?" Severus questioned, eyebrows raised. "What are you doing here?" Without another word, he quickly ushered her inside, making sure no one else was watching or following her before closing the door. He had placed many different kinds of protective charms around his house. If this wasn't her, she would have transformed into whoever was taking on her form, but she appeared to be herself which only made Severus worry. After all, they hadn't spoken to each other since the day they went separate ways. "Are you okay?"

@starwrittenfates: liked for lily.

Lily woke up, confused and alone in a house that she did not recognize. Everything was in shambles. There was a crib, but no baby. Frowning, Lily stood and left the house, not knowing all that she was leaving behind or had left behind. She walked. Her memory was a mess, but she wasn’t completely incapable. Her feet carried her the long distance to an old friends house. She wasn’t even sure who she was going to, only that her body’s instinctive memory lead her there. She lifted a hand and knocked on the door, hoping that someone would let her in. She didn’t know that Godrics Hollow had been miles away, she shouldn’t have even walked that far, but here she was and she was waiting for answers. 

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His eyes narrow at her slightly, letting her know she is stepping into a sensitive and dangerous subject before he uses his Occlumency skills (or at least what he can of it in his current state) to help control his emotions before it gets to that point. He manages to come up with a clever reply and not give away his true motivations. "I wear all black to remind my enemies that I'm always ready for their funeral. It's a sad occasion-- for them, but a steadfast reminder that I will not deal with fools," he sneers. "I thought I taught you this?"

@starwrittenfates | continued from here

“Hmph. Well, I was going to make fun of you, but then you made it sad. Now I’d just feel like an arse if I did,” Imogen pouts. “Well played.”

Her frown fades into something more contemplative. She leans forward, resting her chin on her fist as she studies him with that intensely keen gaze she inherited from her father. “You’ve been wearing all black since my very first potions lesson. It’s been over a decade. Whoever it’s for... Hasn’t it been long enough?”

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To hear he had always been worthy of her despite everything...it made his heart flutter, burning away all the bitterness and soothing the pain that had been locked away for years. It was a strange feeling for Severus, not one he was accustomed too, that was for sure, but coming from Lily, it was welcomed nonetheless. Even when she took him into another sweet kiss, it helped shake away his doubts and fears, assuring him this was all real.

Severus pulled her in closer to him, listening to her need to be held and adored. He could feel her heart fluttering away in her chest, matching in rhythm with his own. Oh...how he had always adored her. Had always wished for this moment and never thought it would happen...until now. So why, when Lily clearly wanted him as much as he wanted her, did he feel as if things were going too fast and that it might be slightly...wrong? After all, there was still the matter of his involvement with telling the Dark Lord of the Prophecy that had changed her life and landed her here to begin with. "Lily..." he said, breaking away from the kiss. The words paused on his tongue as he noticed the tiredness in her eyes, concern for her suddenly washing over him. He have to tell her sooner or later, but for now, her wellbeing was always his first priority. "Have you been sleeping well?" Without another word, he lightly grabbed her hand, directing her towards the bedroom. "Let's go."

Emerald eyes gazed to Severus, scanning his features as she listened to his confession. A gentle smile formed across her features, kind and warm. "I'm here.. you do not need to fret anymore.." Lily responded quietly. Truth be told she still had nightmares from that night, often waking up in a fright though she kept it from Sev, she was sure it was evident in her tired eyes.

Lily couldn't help but lean into his touch, it was automatic, it was comforting. Her hands rest upon his neck as her fingers lightly stroked his skin. "You do not need to be worthy of me Sev.. you always were" it was true, even when they were friends he was the first person who had shown her into the world of magic, to show that she wasn't a freak as her sister had frequently called her. "You are a gifted Wizard, I know you will protect me..but for now..sshh" Lily placed her lips back on his own, yet it wasn't gentle this time, no, it was passionate and there was a need, a hunger.

Green eyes fell shut the moment her lips touched his. Her torso, already close to his own from the kiss before yet Lily couldn't help but try and get closer however physically impossible. The redhead wrapped her arms around his neck, snaking loosely allowing them to drape. She could feel her heart beat begin to quicken in her chest, loud in her ears and Lily was certain he'd be able to feel it even beneath her clothing. She could smell him, his skin, it was woody and earthy. His skin was slightly cold against her fingertips as she brought her hands back to touch his neck, before she lightly brought her fingertips back down to the hem of the neckline of his top, her hands resting against his own chest.

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Severus was still at a loss for words. He wasn't sure what to believe. His insecurities kept telling him he wasn't attractive, or that he would never be worthy enough for Lily, much less that she would ever feel the same about him as he did for her. So even as she lightly touched his face, Severus couldn't help but freeze, wondering if his mind was getting the better of him. This had to be a dream. It wasn't real, was it?

Even as he listened to her speak about her feelings for him, hearing words he had always wanted to hear from her, he still couldn't help but think it was all a dream and if he was to wake, he would find himself in a cruel reality where he would never be good enough for Lily. However, as she got closer to him, Severus felt himself fighting all the temptations to give in and take her into an embrace. It took as his strength to do so, knowing that Lily was the one truly in control here. Whatever she would choose to do, he would follow her wishes. Always. Even if it involved him laying down his walls and showing his vulnerabilities. She was the only one he would ever do so with.

The moment he felt her kissing his lips, something snapped in him, as if confirming this was all really happening. She did want him. Severus couldn't help but follow in line, letting all his passion for her break free. He put his hands around her waist, pulling her closer into the kiss, wanting more. He was sure to be gentle, not wanting to scare her with his longing, but he also felt his mind going dizzy from the excitement that this was happening. After awhile, he broke away to catch his breath, those black eyes of his looking into her green ones with such adoration. He lightly stroked her cheek, studying her, but also trying to regain his words. "That's all I have ever wanted--to be worthy of you. To be the one to bring a smile to your face and keep you safe and happy. My heart has always belonged to you, Lily, from the moment I met you. You're everything to me and it has never changed in all these years." He lightly tucks a stand of her red hair behind her ear. "Sometimes it frightens me how much you mean to me because...the moment I found you in Godric's Hollow and I thought you were...dead...I felt as if a part of me had died that day. But luckily...you are still here. I can't bare losing you because if I did...I think it would kill me."

Lily could see that he wasn't expecting her response. Why would he? Emerald hues searched his own, as if she was searching for his very soul. No, he wasn't James.. yet most would think that would pain the widow, yet in a strange way it didn't. Severus had made her feel safe, happy and perhaps for the first time she was truly seeing him. Fingers lightly stroked the outline of his jaw, delicate and affectionate. Part of her secretly knew that Severus had always loved her, though the other part had been too blind to see it.

Yet Lily did not back away, tell him that he was being foolish as one would imagine. No, Lily kept where she was and a bright smile formed across her features at the admittance that escaped Severus's lips. "You make me feel safe Sev.. happy and warm" Lily began, hell since they were apparently admitting feelings she may as well get everything off her chest. "When you are near I feel like my heart is wanting to come out of my chest, I feel like it is no longer mine because it is yours.. perhaps in a way it always has been.. I do not care for the bad you have done, you are a good man Severus" her voice was still quiet, she went on her tip toes so her forehead could touch with his own.

Her eyes fell shut, she could feel his breath upon her skin, her hands now placing upon his neck still delicate and gentle. Lily didn't think on her next steps, as soft rose coloured lips placed delicately upon his own. Perhaps it was instincts, perhaps it was the fact that she played to her own desire of simply wanting him. Lily had subconsciously chosen Severus months ago, it was only now did she truly realise it and felt brave enough to act on it.

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He had told himself he would never tell her his true feelings. He couldn't risk the rejection. He couldn't risk losing her again either, but Severus found himself doing the opposite and the moment the words left his mouth, he knew there was no taking it back. Hadn't he learned this lesson before?

Preparing himself for the worst (as usual), he was surprised to find her responding in a soft and genuine manner. It made his black eyes go wide briefly, trying to tell himself that she wasn't pitting him. And nor was this a rejection. Instead, Lily seemed to be returning his affections. No...this couldn't be. Severus felt his heart daring to leap out of his chest. Everything he had been doing--- switching sides, becoming a loyal member of the Order, working as a double agent, and even protecting her son, had all been for her. To make up for the mistake's he had made towards her. To make sure Lily was alive and happy, even if it may not be with him. Severus knew that the path he had been walking was leading him closer to death's door everyday, but now, he wasn't so sure what to believe.

"What?" he breathes out, unable to stop himself from being reduced speechless by her, even with all his abilities in deceiving the greatest dark wizard of their time. "I-- but why would you want me?! I'm not like him, Lily, and I never will be. I've done...terrible things, but I do love you. I always have." He figured if he was already at this point, he might as well tell her the truth. She deserved that.

@starwrittenfates asked: ❛  you’re everything that i want, but you don’t want me.  ❜ - Severus

If there was one thing that Lily wasn't expecting it was for Severus to say that. Her breath hitched in her throat, feeling her eyes become hot as the tears welled in her eyes. Even after all this time, all the time they were friends and then when they went their separate ways, only for tragedy to envelope Lily's life to be brought back together.. Severus still believed himself not to be worthy. It broke her heart to say the least.

"..Sev.." Lily stated, taking a step forward without hesitation toward him her hands placing upon the side of his face, fingers lightly touching his jaw. If anyone had asked her a few mere months ago about how Lily felt about the Slytherin she would have denied everything. But now? Now Lily felt different. She felt that same happiness around him that she didn't think she would have been able to feel when James was murdered.. yet here she was, feeling those same butterflies and warmth. "Why would you think that?" It was a genuine question, curiosity laced in her tone as her voice was quiet, not much more than a whisper. Part of Lily felt frightened to feel again, scared that it would be taken from her yet again..

"..because I do want you, you idiot.." she admitted feeling a smile form across her features as she finally admitted it. "I know you deem yourself unworthy, but I choose, you"