#Ughhh piece of shit

[regret-with-a-u]

Hating on the net is not enough. I need to beat the shit out of John Winchester.

[im-still-watching-anime]

one piece is crazy fr like what do you mean you’re following up Everyone’s Dead™️ with Objectifying Women: The Arc™️

[legend-had-it]

yall ever think about how racist klahadore/kuro was towards usopp

[king-spite]

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[saexy]

FUCK YOU NOA.. YOU kniw nothing about him—

[banqanas]

Me: oh it’s already the 30th i should watch that azatokute kachuma episode before i deactivate my premium

Telasa: fuck you

[nvxeur]

fuck this bodily process straight from hell I have a goddamn economics exam tomorrow

this is my way of coping pls understand

[prowl-autism-extraordinaire]

i love having knees that work and also dont hurt. love to have them someday

[numberonepartyboy]

i need a new phone

[bi-writes]

Does MOB ever just like.. walk up to Simon and like... Grab his ass?? Fondle his tibbies a lil bit?? Give a good squeeze to his cheeks or his milkers?? Cause if he was my husband and he was okay w it I would do that shit literally on sight every day

mail-order bride

you've been staring since he walked into the room.

he's wearing a shirt two times too small. it must be laundry day. either way, your husband looks...bigger than normal. he's cooking, standing at the kitchen counter as he sears off a few pieces of something in a pot, and when he drops a few dashes of soy sauce into the pot, you think a man has never looked so sexy sauteing onions.

he turns finally to the cutting board behind him, and he winks when he meets your eyes. you giggle involuntarily, a shrill sound leaving you because you have the biggest fucking crush on this man.

can men have tits? they can. they do. simon does. and you can see them in this tiny fucking shirt, and now you understand sometimes why your dresses end up torn on the floor of your living room--because you just want it.

"simon--"

"'ello, luv," he hums, licking some sauce off his finger before going back to chopping some herbs that lay on the cutting board. you pad further into the kitchen, coming close, and he looks up finally when you're standing right beside him. "somethin' wrong?"

"you're so hot," you whisper, and simon continues chopping, big arm moving as he leans over into your space a little.

"wot's tha'?"

"you're so hot, simon."

he chuckles lowly, moving the knife under the pile to place into a bowl. he sets down the knife and turns to face you, crossing his arms over his chest. fuck, it's making his chest look bigger, ughhh...

"somethin' the matter? ya sick?"

"no," you whine, reaching over, and he drops his arms when you forcibly move them away, pushing your hands up his stomach, over his pecs, squeezing the firm muscle there. "oh my god..." you lean in, getting on your toes, and he gives in quite easily, kissing you warmly. "i can't believe you're mine--"

simon huffs as you throw your arms around his neck, lifting your leg around his waist, and he bends to hoist you into his arms as you start trying to climb him like your very own tree (which even then might be impossible, with the huge trunk of a man that he is). you sigh when he drops your weight onto the counter, and with less distance between you, you take full advantage--licking into his mouth, feeling and squeezing up his chest, whispering between kisses i love you and is it hot in here or is it just you? and i want this, i want you, please, simon.

"wot's gotten into ya, baby?" simon murmurs, holding you at a distance. you're eager to get back to him, to kiss him again, and you whimper when he holds you firm, making you look at him. "hmm?"

"i don't know," you breathe, panting. you squeeze the back of his neck, whining, and you try and scoot closer. "i don't know, i just...you look so good...i just..."

the smile that spreads across his face takes your breath away. he's not pretty, but he's pretty. his face tells a thousand stories. a missing tooth or two, a cut lip that never healed right, the slashes that have closed over unevenly across his eyes and along his cheek--but why is he so gorgeous? what makes you so feral for this one man, more than you've ever been for anyone else in your entire life?

there's just something about him. something about simon makes him so beautiful. there's a soft heart underneath that solid chest, there's a full belly and warm body under your hands as you explore the ridges and dips of the rest of his body. he's got the stature of a protector, the eyes of a killer, but fuck, he loves like no one else.

he loves you. he loves like no one else does, ever will, ever has, and he loves you.

you giggle as you cup his cheeks, tracing his lips with your thumb, admiring him.

"sorry, it's hard to be serious," you sigh, shaking your head. "just wanna jump your bones, simon."

"me, too, luv."

"then what are we waiting for, simon?"

he tsks, drawing you closer, pressing his forehead to yours.

"no idea, baby. no fucking clue."

[yellowsubiesdance]

do you ever just remember something really shitty you did when you were younger and dumber and it makes you feel sick??

[hor3nee]

I'm putting this one on hold cause every time I go back to writing this I end up going off the fucking rails and atp it seems like it'll end up a multi-chapter thing so like.. Yeah. LMFAO

cw: 3some, nsf/w, bottom-leon s. kennedy

WIP in progress... Leon gets raw-dogged by Chris and is also third-wheeling Chris's marriage cause I said so!! LFMSPOSJ

[sundial-bee-scribbles]

I'm going to be taking scriptwriting classes at somepoint so that'll be cool :) I have motivation for short things like that but not actual stories vdsfyffgugvjj 💀 -🌟

Ooh congrats! Hope those go well! :)

But godddd I feel that 😣✌️ writing is so so hard

[kiyo-cant-write]

Imagine if Yuu gets hurts doing something stupid most likely with Ace or Deuce. Floyd for whatever reason ( cough Azul or Jade) think he's what caused their injury. Floyd feels super guilty and wants to make up for what he thinks he did. Until Yuu explains no it wasn't Floyd. Floyd revenge optional.

floyd thinks he injured his s/o ✧･ﾟ

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Hello anon! I'm sorry that this took so long. I love Floyd! Thank you so much for requesting! This was fun to write ^^

I love set ups like this where there's a misunderstanding >.<

Note for everyone that I have a few requests left from earlier to get done before the close of the year and then everything else sent from here on will not be posted until 2025 January. Please keep this in mind, thank you for supporting me!

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Summary: Floyd feels responsible for the injury sustained by his partner and goes to great lengths to apologize. But.... What did you say? It wasn't really his fault?

TW/CW: mentions of violence/injury

Notes: established relationship, the reader is Ramshackle Prefect/Yuu, they/them pronouns for the reader

Guest Stars: Ace Trappola, Deuce Spade, Riddle Rosehearts

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✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

Floyd Leech

Floyd likes violence but not towards [Name].

His partner is one of the people he doesn't want to hurt.

He cares so much about them.

Floyd doesn't usually feel bad but seeing them banged up because of something he did (or so he thinks) makes him feel sick.

He's not in a working mood. Not in the mood for basketball either.

Everyone is annoyed with Floyd now but he doesn't care.

It's his fault. He deserves to feel like this, and so does everyone else. That's how he sees it and he will tell people this.

"I said I'm not in the mood so go mope like the sorry piece of shit you are, none of us deserve to be happy right now."

However, as with all things Floyd, his mood does a swift 180 as soon as he realizes that it was not his fault.

Run.

Ace, Deuce... You're really in for it now.

Not even [Name]'s pleas can stop him this time.

Let him have a little fun with them, won't you?

This sure was boring. Floyd had to hand it to his Shrimpy, they were the most interesting thing in his life. That said, giving them space took something out of his life that he hadn't realized was so integral.

Stupid strength. Stupid impulsivity.

He sighed, leaning against the table he was meant to be cleaning and looking up at the ceiling of the lounge. Was this going to be forever? He was deserving of this punishment, but still... so bored.

Floyd had been left on cleaning duty. Well, that wasn't quite right. Floyd had chosen to do cleanup because that was something he hated. He had to do it or [Name] wouldn't forgive him.

How could they? How could he forgive himself?

The one thing that Floyd didn't want to do was hurt his beloved little shrimp and yet here he was responsible for their injury. How could he have let something like that happen? He should have been more careful, that's what his parents would have told him.

Still, this sucked.

The cleaning was horrible. It was so... repetitive and dull.

"Ughhh."

He wished that something would happen. He wished that [Name] was here with him, chatting with him to pass the time. He wished they would show up to talk to him, so he could apologize too.

Was he really such a coward? He hadn't even said "sorry." Floyd didn't like apologizing, he rarely did with others but they deserved one. And yet here he was punishing himself but still too pathetic to face them.

"Floyd!"

He looked up from the desk to see [Name].

"Shrimpy? Whatcha doin' here?" he asked them, confused.

"I was looking for you! Why are you avoiding me?" they asked.

He shrugged, avoiding the question as well as looking at the bandages peeking out from their sleeves. He didn't want to think about it. Maybe people were right and he was dangerous not just generally speaking, but for [Name] too.

"I'm not."

[Name] let out a "huh" at that statement.

"You are!"

He shook his head.

"Not."

A growl escaped his partner.

"Are!"

Damn, they were being fucking persistent.

He looked at the bandages and then up at their face. They looked annoyed and they had every right to be. He did this to them.

"Shouldn't you be resting?" he asked them, brows furrowed.

"Resting? I'm fine, you sound like a mom."

They rolled their eyes though they seemed confused. Floyd never acted like a mom, that was more a trait of his employer. This was... weird, even for Floyd. [Name] knew their boyfriend. This wasn't normal for him in the slightest.

"You should rest. You're hurt, right?" Floyd repeated.

They sighed this time.

"Just because Deuce accidentally punched me and now everyone is treating me like I'm made of glass or something!" they cried.

Floyd paused.

"Mackerel?"

"Yeah, Deuce was trying to punch Ace and hit me full force," they said, laughing awkwardly as they fiddled with a sleeve, "And that sent me into the roses at Heartslabyul."

"Mackerel..." Floyd said, trailing off.

[Name] gave him a sideways look.

"Don't worry. Riddle already yelled at them for two hours."

Floyd either didn't hear that part or didn't care to comment.

"I didn't do nothing," the eelmer said to himself a moment later, resting a hand over his face as he let out a relieved laugh before it turned into something far more evil.

"Huh??" [Name] looked at him, "Did you think you did this?"

"Maybe."

"Is that why you were avoiding me?"

Floyd averted his eyes for a second before nodding.

"Felt bad."

"Aww!"

He was suddenly hit with the full force of [Name] hugging him and saying things about how he was so sweet to be concerned and how much they loved him. It was nice, actually. He missed them.

"Glad you're alright~" he told them, holding them closer to him.

...

A day later, during a break, Floyd stepped into Heartslabyul against the wishes of its housewarden. But he didn't care, he had a certain mission he needed to complete and it was unlikely anyone would be able to stop him. He wasn't movable where [Name] was concerned.

"Heyyy~" he drawled out, stepping towards the flamingo pen.

Floyd didn't even have the lightheartedness in his soul to make fun of Deuce's outfit. He had business with them. Still, it was quite a sight to see the "honor student" of a mackerel in pink leopard print.

"LEECH-SENPAI?" Deuce almost screamed as he stood quickly, rigid, "What are you doing here in our dorm???"

"NO TIME DEUCEY, RUN!" Ace yelled, already several feet away and sprinting at speeds he had never run before, "THIS IS THE END."

Deuce wasted no time and took off in the same direction as Ace.

"Find your own direction!" Ace told Deuce who just about scoffed.

The eel cracked his knuckles in preparation.

"This should be fun~"

"FLOYD LEECH LEAVE MY DORMITORY THIS INSTANT!"

The sound of heels against the pavement heading toward him.

"Don't wanna~" he offered, taking off after ADeuce.

"FLOYYYYYDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD-"

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Imagine the rest yourself~

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✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

Thank you for reading! Likes and reblogs are appreciated! Do NOT repost my writing/headcanons as your own >:c Check the top of my blog for the inbox status and read the rules before requesting. This is not a twst-only blog! ^^

[sanjisboyfie]

one piece smau: dating ace edition

— male reader <3 i love ace so much sorry it took so long to finish this pooks

— im a firm believer that ace definitely types hehehehe and actually does giggle in real life. he's such a giggler.

liked by [l/n].ace, freeluffy, and 17k others

portgas.[name]: best part about dating ace?? his person(a)lity(rms) ❤️

tagged: [l/n].ace

[l/n].ace: damn id smash this fine mffff

-> portgas.[name]: im deleting this post u fucking narcissist

freeluffy: i still win our arm wrestles tho 🥱

roro.zoro: does [name] know he mispelt personality?

-> portgas.[name]: its something called a pun, zoro.

-> roro.zoro: well the delivery sucked i thought ur brain had an aneurysm

revo.sabo: BARRRFFFF this egotistical maniac didnt need this stroke to his ego [name]

-> portgas.[name]: trust me im regretting even dating ur silly ass brother rn

-> [l/n].ace: r u guys talking about me 🥺🥺🥺🥺

liked by portgas.[name], m4rco.polo, and 19k others

[l/n].ace: pov ur on a date with me and watching me try not to vomit all the sushi i shoved into my mouth all over the table

tagged: portgas.[name]

portgas.[name]: why r u on dates w other ppl???

-> [l/n].ace: ITS A JOKE BABY PLS

-> portgas.[name]: mhm

m4rco.polo: damn this shit sounds disgusting id never go on a date w u again if i saw this tbh

[liked by portgas.[name], eee.izo, yammyato, and 100 others]

yamayamato: r u cheating on [name] ace?

-> [l/n].ace: IT WAS A JOKE ITS AN INTERNET SAYING PLEASE

-> yamayamato: yeah well i dont think its very funny :// u should be loyal in a relationship

-> portgas.[name]: yamato <333 u were always my favorite boy ugh i love u sm 🥰

liked by portgas.[name], yamayamato, and 21k others

[l/n].ace: weekly me post bc i love me! (and my mans) 🤓😕

tagged: portgas.[name]

portgas.[name]: yeah im in there guys!!!

-> [l/n].ace: i love u hehehe u make me blush hehehehe

portgas.[name]: are u free tn? i'll take u out and treat u right ughhh

-> [l/n].ace: i got a date with my bf later tn, sorry not sorry !!!

revo.sabo: i need to mute you because i can't be seeing this shit when im in public

-> [l/n].ace: dont be ashamed that your brother is so hot wtf

revo.sabo: with all due respect, im already ashamed that hes my brother in general soooo

[liked by portgas.[name], eee.izo, and 200 others]

yamayamato: my arms are still bigger. get on my level ace HAHAHA

-> portgas.[name]: proof?

-> [l/n].ace: this is literally cheating, you're cheating on me right now. can you please stop cheating on me with yamato?

liked by [l/n].ace, portgas.[name], and 15k others

m4rco.polo: god forbid these two do anything by themselves

tagged: [l/n].ace and portgas.[name]

[l/n].ace: ur just jealous ur not in love like we are

-> portgas.[name]: agreed bc how r u gonna be like 40 and still not get any play

-> m4rco.polo: 40?????

dni_nami: i loveee them (whenever they come over they ruin the entire house and im this close to murdering them both)

-> portgas.[name]: but nami 🥺🥺🥺

-> dni_nami: no.

eee.izo: its like ace is trying to become one with him or smth, so unsettling

-> [l/n].ace: weren't you the one preaching about young love a week ago?

-> eee.izo: and now im telling u to GROW UP ace, he's not going anywhere if u let go of him for two seconds

[liked by m4rco.polo, revo.sabo, and 90 others]

liked by portgas.[name], freeluffy, revo.sabo, and 22k others

[l/n].ace: i love my snookums baby boy handsome pretty king to the moon and to saturn <3

tagged: portgas.[name]

portgas.[name]: ... i guess i love you too.

-> [l/n].ace: be more confident when u say it baby cakes

-> m4rco.polo: oh my god [name] break up with this fool already what the fuck is this

freeluffy: whats a snookums?

-> roro.zoro: don't ask luffy, you wouldn't want to know.

revo.sabo: awww what a cute post, if only ace were normal <3

[liked by eee.izo, m4rco.polo, and 100 others]

-> [l/n].ace: ????

-> portgas.[name]: im so glad we can agree on this sabo !!!

liked by eee.izo, [l/n].ace, revo.sabo, and 22k others

portgas.[name]: rare sighting of a photo of ace with his shirt on, everyone celebrate in the comments !!!

tagged: [l/n].ace

portgas.[name]: dont get me wrong hes sexy both ways but im not trying to see his nipples every where i go

-> [l/n].ace: but babe you said u liked my titties 🥺🥺🥺

-> portgas.[name]: can you not do this rn.

revo.sabo: yayyy finally he stopped being a WHORE

-> portgas.[name]: at least he can be my whore, but still i agree

-> [l/n].ace: you're the most confusing man i know

-> [l/n].ace: i love u sm hehehehe

-> revo.sabo: the way ik his ass is blushing so hard rn and kicking his feet in the air

eee.izo: thank god for that, i was getting tired of seeing him shirtles sin every single post

m4rco.polo: finally !!!

portgas.[name]'s story:

i love him A LOOOTTTTTTTT even though he's a lil freak

[l/n].ace replied to your story: when he posts you 😍😍 i love u too bby (even tho u literally cheat on me to my face with yamato but its wtv bc i love u enough to ignore it ❤️)

[semperamans]

personally i think benny likes to keep pieces of her with him bc he down BAD

like he’d tie one of her cute scarfs to his belt loop or the the handle of his bike and he just sees it blowing in the wind UGHHH

the scarf on the beltloop the scarf on the beltloop the scarf on the beltloop :'(

you just have so many trinkets and little things that benny has never been exposed to so he's fascinated.

those elastic things you have around your wrist that he can't pronounce most of the time - scrunchies- fuck, he loves those! keeps one on him at all times so you can deal with your hair before putting on a helmet and tells you he's gonna grow his hair out so he can use them, too. zipco has actually taken a few and likes to wear his hair in haphazard, spikey ponytails. it's pretty precious.

then, of course, you kissed benny once and your lips tasted like watermelon and he likes watermelon and likes how it now makes him think of you so when he's going on a few-day run he tucks an extra stick of the flavored chapstick in his pack and when the guys make fun of him because "the fuck is that?" he rolls his eyes. his lips get dry when he's riding, not his fault.

your things are starting to pop up everywhere; you've got a sweater on the coatrack in the clubhouse, a permanent spot between benny and wahoo whenever the club takes a group shot, and you put a pink can of air freshener in the bathroom and sweet smelling handsoap on the sink basin (thank god). benny likes it. likes to see your things scattered about because it means you're there, not going anywhere, stuck with him like glue. there's a spare toothbrush next to his in the cup in the bathroom and a second towel hanging on the back of the door. your earrings are on his nightstand and a chiffon nightie thrown over the lamp from-well- it doesn't matter. your mismatched socks are mixed with his and there is perfume on his dresser and shit, he can't wait for the day you move in for good like you have in his heart.