#Top independent living communities

[primussenior]

Are you planning your retirement and looking for top independent living communities? Then check our Primus Senior Homes; they are independent living communities for seniors with many amenities. You can check out the Primus Life page for more details and choose the city in India you want to settle in. 

[jordan3144]

Top independent living communities

Unable to give the time and care your parents deserve with your workload? You can now stop searching for top independent living communities and have a look at Primus, the complete senior care ecosystem. It is a place that your loved one deserves with all amenities that make them feel at home. Primus Life provides emotional support and looks after physical and social well-being, making it the number one space for the elderly to stay.

[queerlyglittering]

everything is fake, nothing matters, i will and should be alone for the rest of my life. what is the fucking point

[lionheartlr]

Exploring Belgium: A Comprehensive Travel Guide

Belgium, a charming country nestled in Western Europe, offers a rich tapestry of history, culture, and modernity. This guide will take you through Belgium’s history, colonial past, political landscape, education system, and practical travel information, ensuring a delightful and informed visit. A Brief History of Belgium Belgium’s history is a blend of influences from Roman times to modern-day…

[mylivingchoice]

Best Senior Living Communities in Los Angeles Are you looking for the best communities for senior living in Los Angeles? Look no further than My living choice. We help you to find the best senior living communities in Los Angeles. When looking for a senior living community for your loved one, it's good to have someone to help with this process. We feel it is important to provide a tool allowing you to do your own research and help make your own decision. For more information, visit our website.

[lesmana-enterprise-ltd]

LAIS HOUSE Dormitory, Residential Rental (NO CC)

About LAIS House

LAIS House is a premier dormitory for LAIS students located just 2km from campus in downtown Copperdale. Designed for comfort and convenience, it offers spacious private rooms, vibrant common areas, fully equipped kitchens, and top-tier amenities like a gym, swimming pool, jacuzzi, and entertainment spaces. With a semesterly rent of 18,000 simoleons, LAIS House provides a luxurious yet practical living experience for students who live far from school. Live, study, and thrive at LAIS House!

Welcome to LAIS House! 🏡✨

Just 2km from LAIS, this modern dormitory in downtown Copperdale is designed for students who want the perfect balance of comfort, independence, and community. With spacious private rooms, cozy common areas, fully equipped kitchens, and top-tier amenities like a gym, swimming pool, jacuzzi, and entertainment spaces, LAIS House offers a luxurious yet practical student living experience. Whether you're studying, socializing, or unwinding, this is the place to live, learn, and thrive. Ready to move in? 🏫

The lobby serves as the heart of LAIS House, featuring a cozy common space where students can relax, study, or chat with friends. For those looking to stay active, the on-site gym provides a great way to unwind after a long day at school. With modern amenities and a welcoming atmosphere, LAIS House is the perfect place to call home!

Dorm Layout

LAIS House is a mixed-gender dormitory designed for comfort, convenience, and community living. Each floor features a spacious common kitchen and dining area, perfect for shared meals and socializing, complete with a TV for entertainment. Residents have access to a common shower area on every floor, ensuring accessibility for all.

Don't Forget to Unwind!

Step outside and enjoy the heated pool and jacuzzi, offering the perfect way to de-stress year-round. The comfortable backyard is an inviting space to hang out, study outdoors, or enjoy a peaceful evening.

Disclaimer

LAIS House is a 9-unit residential Rental, which is above the game limit of 6 units. Before placing LAIS House, make sure these cheats had been activated:

Testingcheats true

bb.increaserentalunitcap on

2. LAIS House is registered as CC. Please note that there is NO CC you need to download to use LAIS House.

How do you put this build?

Enter the lot that you will place LAIS House in

Change the lot type to Residential Rental

Activate the cheat mentioned above

Place the lot

Location

Download

Via SFS: Download

Don't Forget to Download LAIS!

Also Check out the coming soon LAIS Polo uniform CC here!

Sul Sul!,

The Lesmana Enterprise Co., Ltd with Lesmana Arta International School

[littlefankingdom]

I know y'all are not ready for it, but I'm this close 🤏 to hc Bruce having an eating disorder because of how strict Alfred is written about food in canon and fanon. Everyone is writing it as if it's a funny joke that the Batfam has to hide "unhealthy" snacks from him, but it's not. (Btw, just the "healthy" and "unhealthy" label are wrong and bad. Food is food.)

In the comics, Bruce will be offered a donut and think about how Alfred would disapprove and how it will harm his health, before accepting. And, sure, to live the life he lives, Bruce need to follow a particular diet. But it's just ONE donut, it cannot harm him. That's not a healthy mindset at all. The fact that Bruce, as a grown adult with kids, is thinking about Alfred's reaction to him eating a donut before accepting, vocalizing how it is against the rules, is alarming.

And maybe I would accept it, as a non-usamerican, if it was because of the toxic things they put in your food there (criminal what they make you eat), but it's never about that. No, it's about the calories and the heartburn, and "fast food and sugar" are bad, and "poor people food is bad" (Alfred's classicism is another point for another time). Alfred controls what the Wayne eat and he is very controlling about that, as the boys will also comment about Alfred disapproving something before eating it. This is some ED behavior, you shouldn't worry about food like this. And like, I'm split between being thankful neither Bruce or the kids enforce it to one another, but also being annoyed they need to remind others how "Alfred wouldn't approve" when they see them eating something not allowed.

Thinking about Dick and his cereals, especially that Nightwing (2016) page where he gets a Nightwing truck and it has a compartiment with a ton of cereals. It is a commun behavior in children who were restricted some type of food to over indulge in it once they are independent. If cereals were something Alfred was against because he finds it "unhealthy", Dick's extreme love for cereals is a red flag.

Me, talking about Bruce: The boy was mentally fucked up enough, you didn't have to give him an ED on top, Alfred!

[echodoctor]

I wonder if part of why Siffrin is the party member most willing to let Bonnie do things the others are worried will be too risky or scary for them is because they were more or less on their own from a fairly early age?

The creator of In Stars And Time mentioned once that Siffrin was a teenager when the Northern Island vanished.

I personally assume that he was thirteen. Now, there's wiggle room there- she didn't specify an exact age, just "a teenager". They could have been older.

But since they were trying to play a prank by "running away from home" (for like twenty minutes tops) when the whole thing happened- and over not wanting to eat their veggies, no less- I feel pretty reasonable in assuming that we're talking about someone on the young end of the teenage range here, not like an eighteen year old with the RPG Fantasy World version of a job and a driver's license.

So, thirteen.

And if Bonnie is somewhere around eleven or twelve, that's... not that far off, age-wise.

Siffrin doesn't really seem to have had anyone looking out for them, before. Presumably someone must have helped them at least a little when they first arrived, but I get the feeling it was less "oh no we have to get you a foster family you poor dear!!" and more along the lines of getting directions to the local homeless shelter and food pantry equivalents- probably a House of Change, since caring for those in need seems like the kind of duty a religious institution would have in a pre-modern society, and what we see about Housemaiden duties from Mirabelle and Euphrasie does appear to involve a lot of community outreach and support.

Which is great in terms of "not actually dying", but larger institutions are usually dealing with a lot of things at once and can't provide a lot of careful individual attention. So Siffrin was likely just... figuring out how to be a functional person on their own.

So all of that basically boils down to: I'm not sure Siffrin actually has any idea what the normal amount of responsibility and independence a kid is "supposed" to have is, because they have no memory of ever having an adult who could look out for them in the first place.

They're just mentally referencing what they were doing when they were Bonnie's age and going 'hmm, well that wasn't great but I didn't die or anything... let's make sure they have some adult supervision and reassure them they can ask us for help if they want to, and it'll probably be fine'.

...Which, it turns out, is actually a pretty decent approach here, because despite the party's best efforts Bonnie is still essentially a refugee from a country-wide disaster, and trying to treat them like a kid who's living a completely stable, normal, sheltered life ignores a lot of what they're going through.

They're not trying to make Bonnie's life fit into what a "normal" childhood should be, because they never got to have one. And Bonnie responds well to that because it's coming from a place of empathy and shared similar experiences.

tl;dr Former semi-feral free range child mentors current semi-feral free range child, results surprisingly positive.

[aeolianblues]

‘Indie sleaze’ is not 2014, ‘Indie sleaze’ is not 2014, ‘Indie sleaze’ is not 2014, ‘Indie sleaze’ is not 2014!

It’s not tumblr-core and it’s not Lana Del Ray or 2013 AM, it’s not #girl interrupted, it’s not Ethel Cain (she literally is an artist of our time, what are you on about.)

It was 2001 with the Strokes on the cover of the NME every 2 weeks, it was cabaret night and English poetry with the Libertines in 2002, it’s those red and blue military jackets, it was the fucking grease in Julian Casablancas’ hair, it’s ’cocaine was the banker’s drug’ quoth Alex Kapranos, it was Don't Go Back To Dalston and the heroin, it was red and black horizontal striped tops and tight black shirts as evening wear, it was Russell Lissak’s mop top and a full page interview with London hairdressers in the NME in 2005, it was Jack and Meg’s saturated red and white dresses, it was glued glitter on the cover of Santigold’s first album, it was the sleaze and the sex of CSS’s music, it was ‘cold light, hot night’, it was the anti-Bush and anti-war stances of the bands at the time, it was America by Razorlight, it was Popworld on telly and Simon Amstel being a little shit to musicians, it was Karen O defying death on stage nightly, it was throwing up in shitty nightclubs on god knows what drugs, it was the fucking danger knowing this could all collapse any second—and rightly, it should. It was the godawful egos at DFA, it was knowing that while you were lucky to be seeing these bands live, you’d fucking hate them if you had to spend even a minute in their individual company. It was Amy Winehouse telling the world to get the fuck out of her business, it was Leslie Feist and Peaches sharing a dilapidated flat above a sex shop in Toronto.

It was horrible camera flash and red-eye editing softwares and putting your feet by the warm, spinning fans of your computer while it whirred away and downloaded your albums in *checks* 46 more minutes. It was horrible, it was dirty, it was gritty, we all hated it and thought the 90s were the last time music was good and that nothing good had happened since 1997. It was garishly bright clothes we were all embarrassed of by 2011, it was multiple layers and leggings and asking your mum to cut the itchy tag on the back of your low rise jeans only for her to snip your back. It was bell bottoms at the start of the decade. It being thankful that by 2017, no one would dream of wearing low rises anymore, please please, please let them never come back.

It was faux nostalgic of the past itself. It was ‘please make sure baby you’ve got some colours in there’ in your clothes. It was moral panic over emos. It was wanting to escape into a better past that you could see was visibly impoverished in the present. It was watching your favourite programmes become less and less relevant on air. It was watching MTV decisively die a horrible death. It was watching important venues and nightclubs get bulldozed. It was watching the last regular broadcast of Top Of The Pops in 2006. It was seeing how the 2009 financial crisis most definitely put a stop to independent music in the western world for a decade, it was watching the rise of bedroom DIY and electronic music. It was seeing the phrase ‘SoundCloud rapper’ being coined. It was the rise of Disney pop. It was counter-culture Justin Bieber hatred. It was the MS paint meme of those tumblr girls thoroughly unimpressed by the guy.

It was not using the words ‘indie sleaze’ at all, in fact. That’s a retconned word. It was garage rock revival. It was ‘post-grunge’. We didn’t care what it was called, we hated it all the same. It was a lead into a decade of despair and nihilism, it was the last hurrah for the music industry before it splintered into a thousand little online ecosystems, it was the last time we had physical community and any shared pop cultural moments. It was Live8 2005. It was the same as it is now, and it was a time that’ll never happen again, for better and for worse.

But one thing is for sure: it was decisively dead by 2014. Santi and Karen O’s 2012 collab was its last hurrah and it was dead by Comedown Machine by the Strokes (2013). It has nothing to do with 2014.

[crepezinhos]

Aventurine’s Suicide Note

POV: It’s been only a week since Aventurine tried to commit suicide in Penacony, and failed at doing so, yet, it feels like it’s been months. You two don’t really talk anymore, specifically, not about anything else that wasn’t his attempt and the letter he did for it, and it’d always lead to exhausting discussions about your relationship with him that only seemed to crack it even more. Neither of you want to be like this anymore, ghosting each other’s presence in your apartment as if you were strangers. That’s why you decided to give him a chance to make up for his wrongs, and show you what he meant when he said he desired you in his letter. Art Credits

⚠️ WARNINGS:

— This is an angsty (with slight comfort) NSFW piece

— Reader is FEMALE and uses SHE/HER pronouns

— Contains: Mentions of detailed SA, suicide, slavery, physical and mental abuse and friend-zoning. This work also contains optional visual links.

— AU is: In-Game

— Switch!Aventurine x Stoneheart!Reader

“Kakavasha.” Hearing you call out his real name after so many hours in silence made his whole body curl on itself with anxiety, making him pull the sheets on top of him a bit harder.

Your voice was as gentle and soft as before all the recent events in Penacony, yet, he dreaded it more than anything. He was ashamed to acknowledge you, to listen to you, to look at you… ashamed of himself.

“I don’t want us to be like this.” Meanwhile, you laid in the bed with your belly turned up, blankly staring at the white roof above you and him, waiting for any sort of answer from him, whose back was all you could see.

But as silence prevailed in the room, you sighed and closed your eyes in disappointment. That helped you concentrate on the memories your head was playing of your whole life to help you find more things to say to him.

It all started when you two met each other when the same man bought the both of you, and dozens of other slaves to be his servants. He gave every two slaves a cell to live in together, although all the work you two did was independent, and you ended up with him as your partner. 35 and 36 were your respective numbers along with a matching tattoo you two had on the left side of your neck. The depression of being a slave made it hard for you two to communicate and bond at first, but you two eventually built a weird, but helpful bond. One where he’d always try to help you with your tasks, where you’d let him teach about and practice his clan’s rituals with you, and more especially, one where he’d always comfort you after the abuse.

…

…

The memories flooded your mind.

Being taken to some isolated room by force, then being forced to strip down or having your clothes ripped away by his hands, and then having your body invaded, touched, used, humiliated even, for the sake of the pleasure of your master…

Sometimes he’d even have more men in the room to witness the shows or even participate in them…

It happened multiple times. Each round made you lose more and more of yourself. The sole reason why you didn’t lose faith in men was because the person who would comfort you after these dark moments was a man too. Kakavasha. He didn’t understand the concept of rape, much less the consequences of it, yet, he took care of you for hours. He only learned that the reason you’d suddenly come back to your cell completely shaky and repulsive of physical touch, sometimes naked too, was because you were raped almost 2 years after getting out of that hellhole. Then, he finally started to understand and relate to your shy personality.

You still remember the day he killed the man with his own hands. All the other slaves were immediately happy with the news and fled as soon as possible, but Kakavasha refused to get out of there without you. He went back to your cell, unchained your wrists and neck and started dragging you by your wrist out of there. He refused to let go of it, even when he wanted to rest, when he needed both his hands to work, and especially, even when IPC wanted to recruit him. The pink-haired woman who negotiated with him was solely interested in him and his cursed luck, ignoring your presence and taking it as an inconvenience mostly, but he wouldn’t agree with any of her contracts if it didn’t include you.

That’s how you got your first title in the IPC: The Secretary of Strategic Investment Departments. It technically meant you were Kakavasha’s secretary since you were in his team. Only many years later you managed to get yourself a Stoneheart title, Ruby, gaining a lot of trust and respect from all of those who underestimated you, and you viewed as a leech to Aventurine.

All these dear memories and many others are why you feel so betrayed and hurt right now. He desired to throw it mall of that away. He tried to throw all of it away. How unfair, isn’t it? While you were trying your best to retrieve his cornerstone from the Family, he was getting ready to sacrifice himself and leave you behind. A few minutes before he was announcing his little game to the whole planet, you came to your hotel room exhausted only to find his stuff entirely packed, all the lights tuned off and with a weird letter sitting at the only desk of the room.

Why were you even giving yourself all this work of reliving such bittersweet moments? You’ve already pointed out the fact that he was trashing everything he’s built and all the connection you two had in previous fights anyway…

“We’re still best friends, aren’t we? Even if you broke my heart, the same way I must’ve broken yours too, we’re still the same, right?” You tried cheering Aventurine up, acting enthusiastically, but his body still seemed as immobile as a statue. So you sighed again, your fake smile dying. “I’ve been thinking a lot about you wrote.” You spoke more seriously, pausing for a moment to remember the content in the letter and what you had to say about it.

At first, you picked the letter thinking it was a message from the IPC, but when you realized the handwriting belonged to Aventurine, you found yourself more confused. After all, if he wanted to tell you something, he could’ve just texted you, right?

It started off with an apology for not being home or answering your earlier texts, then it transitioned to him retelling your history with him with a lot of passion, your current friendship with him and how he values it more than anything. Money, the IPC and even his own life. But you weren’t expecting the stakes of the letter to go downhill, and as fast as the speed of light.

“Although our friendship seems to be very well established to you, for me, it isn’t. For me, it is as unstable as this planet, and it’s all because of me. I hate to bring you into this, Y/N, but I can’t let myself die without being completely honest to you in this final letter. I am in love with you, Y/N. I am painfully, desperately and agonizingly head over heels for you, Y/N. I wonder how your face is like reading this, but I’d rather let curiosity torture me. Whether you reciprocate me or not, they’d make me feel even worse about what I’m doing right now, and I want to at least die peacefully. Going back to the main point, this is something that I’ve been closeting for years, something I’ve been neglecting for years. I’ve only come to accept it recently, when I decided that it’s not really worth living anymore, so I might as well just be open about it to you. You’re a wonderful woman, Y/N. Your self-steem might be low, you might find yourself vulnerable, weak, untalented and unattractive, but I assure you that no one views you like this. I, personally, view you as the complete contrary. Every single thing about you is perfect to me. Remember those few times we would dance together? The few times we danced here? Especially to White Night? You were always shy and awkward at first, but when you slowly started opening yourself more and start actually dancing, you had me almost passing out, Y/N. Whether it was because of how charming and beautiful you looked, how much I admired you, or the pain of knowing that you would never let me hold you closer, show you the love you deserve, kiss your lips, hold your hips and guide your body as we jammed to those songs. Please, even after I die, I want you to always remember you’re more than your fears and your position at the IPC. I want you to look at yourself in the mirror and always fill your lungs with confidence before going out. Even if I might always be nothing more than a dear friend to you, I don’t want you to ever pity me for this. I want to respect your boundaries and I want you to do it too. But I do love you, Y/N. More than anything.

You dear friend, Kakavasha.”

It was tough for you to absorb the information that Aventurine’s gaze upon you wasn’t innocent or a part of his confident facade and that it was lustful. To learn that he fantasized with something so impossible to you made you feel horrible for the man, even the pity that he begged you not to feel. You’d never tell him you were feeling pitiful, of course, but you still accepted that guilt, and you truly felt motivated to use it as a fuel for a new experiment.

“I want to give you a chance, Kakavasha.” Confessing such heavy words also made you want to avoid looking at him, who has been staring at the nightstand beside him while listening to you.

“No.” He suddenly mumbled, which surprised you. “I don’t want you to feel pity for me. I don’t deserve it and you don’t deserve it. It’s not fair… and it’s not what I want.” His voice was firm, far from what you usually hear from him.

“Well then. What do you want, Kakavasha?” You answered a bit enthusiastically again, wanting to keep him talking the most you could.

“If anything were to ever happen between us, I want it to be genuine. Something you’ve started to feel without me interfering the same way I did. But now, it just feels wrong.” You could sense his stress behind his slightly broken voice.

“Why?” You were slightly offended by his words.

“Because you are a victim of rape, Y/N!” He snapped with your innocence and rose from his place, sitting in the bed while he turned his whole body to you. “I should’ve died! All those things I wrote in the letter were supposed to be my last words, not my actual confession! Now it just feels I’m trying to trick into feeling bad for me and romancing with me and you’re falling for it…” You also rose up from your place as he screamed at you for balance, but unfortunately, couldn’t bring himself to speak much more than that due to his growing distress, sighing as he rubbed his fingers in his eyes afterwards.

“I-I understand that I am a bit afraid indeed, Vasha, but I don’t feel I’m falling for anythin—” You tried giggling it off to hide your real anxiety, but Kakavasha was reciprocating none of your patience.

“Yes, you are! You don’t think you’re falling for it because you already fell! You might not understand it yet, Y/N, but I do. This is not a part of your nature anymore. It was ruined and ripped away from you by our master, and that’s okay! Life has much more to it than this! You don’t need it to live properly! But this feeling is real Y/N, and most of us feel it. Most of us would rather to live their lives with someone to share their love with, and I’m one of them. I’m a desperate lost case! God, I’m so obsessed with you I’ve even asked Topaz if you had ever shared a secret of this kind with her because I was throbbing to learn if I was in your mind? It could even be someone else, but she’d always tell me ‘no’! I’ve even paid her to talk to you about it, try to indulge you into telling her any information, she’d come back with nothing? You see, Y/N? You don’t feel that need! You probably think I’m disgusting now anyway…” You couldn’t deny that what he told about Topaz was a bit shocking. If you ever told her anything lewd in those conversations, would she really tell Aventurine without your knowledge? Those few conversations weren’t innocent girl-talk as she called it?

But you really couldn’t find yourself mad at him in the end of the day, despite him believing you already were. You just didn’t know what to say. He had a really fair point about your mind. You were very knowledgeable about many sorts of topics, enough to protect yourself even, but you were truly inexperienced about love. Were you just falling for his words? But it doesn’t feel like it. It just feels like your heart is softening… opening itself for a new thing.

But, he seemed so insistent about you and he has so much more knowledge too. Maybe he is right. He’s a better source than you are, and maybe it’s just better to accept it. So you looked away from him, your eyes meeting the window of the room, displaying the flashy streets of Penacony under the moonlight.

“I-I’m sorry.” Kakavasha suddenly leaned in and hugged you from behind, his forehead resting in your shoulder. “You’re just really precious to me, Y/N, and I don’t want to lose out relationship for something so stupid.” He whispered softly, contrasting his previous tone, but making you relax your muscles a bit.

Despite being a risky bet, seeing how he had relaxed opened a path for you to continue arguing with him instead of letting the conversation die.

“So what if it’s out of pity, Vasha?” You tried waiting for an answer but nothing came out of him, so you opted to continue. “So what if you’ve messed me up and this is just a momentary curiosity that I’ll forever regret later? Do you think it’s more worth for me to live full of unresolved fears rather than trying to face them even if I fail?” He sighed in distress again seeing you didn’t want to end the conversation. He really wishes you could both just ignore the fact that he tried to commit suicide.

“That’s not what I mean, Y/N. I just think that you’re not likely to like it and I don’t want to be the one that ruins your expectations of this even more.” He pulled himself away from you, refusing to even look at you as he offended you.

“Who do you think you are to judge what I want and what I don’t?!” You gave him a little push as you snapped, recovering a bit of power for yourself. “And what if I like it, Vasha? What if you’re simply wasting your own luck away? It’s a risky gamble, I won’t lie to you, but that’s your niche, isn’t it?!” You paused for a moment, recovering all the air you’ve lost from the screaming. “You prefer gamble on your own death rather than gamble on me and you?!” You started to feel pressure in the back of your eyes, signaling you had tears coming down, and you did nothing to stop them.

Kakavasha remained as silent as a rock. The answer was obvious to the both of you, but he didn’t want to admit it, prefering to endlessly stare at the nothingness ahead of him as he absorbs your sorrow in silence.

You had a lot more to say to him, a lot more reasons to show him, but his lack of response made you conclude the case on your own. He didn’t want it, he didn’t want to be convinced, and there’s nothing you can do about it rather than respect him even if it hurt you a lot.

So you wheezed. With a lot of untold anger behind it that you didn’t want to express.

“Good night, Vasha.” You spat at him, trying your best to not let yourself go madder while laying down in the bed to get ready to sleep again. “I just hope you understand how uncomfortable it is to know that I was in that letter as a burden to you, as the main reason for you to feel so depressed to the degree of suicide, and that I can’t do nothing about it and I just have to accept the role that I have of being the most useless friend—” Before you could turn your whole body to the window of the room and ignore his presence in the bed for the whole night, you felt his hand hook your left shoulder hard, and hold your body in that previous angle you were at, only to meet Aventurine launching into you like a hungry animal and shutting your mouth with his lips.

You were stoned, unable to react to it even if all your limbs were perfectly available to push him away from you. You didn’t want to. It was the first time in many years that you felt a pair of lips against yours, and the first time those lips belonged to Kakavasha. It didn’t feel bad. It honestly felt like a need he awakened insideyou. Although the lack of given consent was not something you were a fan of, you knew Kakavasha. He would never do something like this in normal circumstances, much less to hurt you.

As soon as Kakavasha felt your body ease and melt into the heavy kiss that he insisted on, he finishing towering his body above yours, placing his own knees around yours, cornering them, and his pale palms pressing the pillow under your head down.

“Shut up…” He paused the kiss for a brief moment to murmur the order in an angry tone. “You’re not… a burden... or useles...” Even if Kakavasha had so many things to say to you, he didn’t want to stop kissing you at all. “You’re anything… but a burden… to me.” After all, your wet lips felt great just as he dreamed it to be.

Your cold hands ran up to latch on his head to keep him kissing you with no breaks in between making him shiver even harder in excitement.

Pulling his head deeper into yours forced his tongue to invade your mouth, sticky noises and groans beginning to fill the space between you two as saliva started to mix in your mouths and your tongues danced together.

For almost a minute, you two just stopped thinking just to fully focus on feeling each other. His head, who had most power between you two, turned to many different angles just to explore the most corners of your mouth he could, and you accepted it bravely. Your foreheads were rubbing together almost painfully, noses touching each other’s cheek, but no further physical contact was being done between you two. You could swear he was wishing he could move his hands, though. But as expected, he preferred to respect your limits.

And then, when he was finally done, he pulled his tongue and lips out of you. He didn’t dare separating your foreheads or break eye contact. You two were just staring each other. You, who looked at him more surprised, overwhelmed and uncertain, while he was visibly looking at you with arousal and desire.

“Y/N…” He moaned your name like a prayer. “I… I want more.” He confessed ins hoarse mumble, his cheeks blushing in a red tone that you’ve never seen before, even harder seeing how you immediately reacted to it with more shock. “I promise you, I just want to make you feel good… make you feel loved. That’s all. Really, I’ll be gentle, I’ll be slow, I’ll do whatever you have in your head, I’ll—” His eyes squinted, begging you for continuity as his voice slightly broke with despair and embarrassment.

You couldn’t help but start breathing a little bit faster than you were, your eyes turning away from his intense gaze.

Sex.

How come you haven’t thought of this after all you’ve read and heard from him yet? For the kind of man he currently is, it was idiotic of you to assume he wouldn’t desire you in such a lustful way. And now that the reality started hitting you, it felt weird. It was bizarre to think of you and him doing something like that.

The touching, the looking, the hearing, the moaning, the thrusting, the nudity, the feeling…

You really wish you could view it positively… fall in love with it, but he was right, your mind had been ruined for this sort of thing. It would always turn your imaginations of this into your real memories of it, which made your body sweat in fear and your legs to rub against each other in reluctance.

“That’s why I think we shouldn’t do this, Y/N. You don’t like it… You can’t like it.” He weakly smiled down at you seeing how uneasy you were with his confession.

“N-No!” You quickly reached down for his arms before he could get off you, caging yourself under him. “D-Do it… Please.” You used your fingers to gently brush his wrists, trying to convince him to stay.

Kakavasha was definitely a little surprised, even a bit aroused, with your initiative. You found motivation by the mere fact that you never felt an ‘orgasm’, and according to many women you’ve heard talking about it, it feels wonderful, even if it is at the price of doing something like this, which is so expensive to you.

“Are you… serious..?” Kakavasha’s eyes were shining with excitement, although he tried to maintain his concerned look.

“I want believe that this is as good as people say, and trust you to be the one doing it.” The more you spoke to Kakavasha, the more his violet eyes seemed to gain life.

“Y/N, I—” He chuckled a bit, feeling too embarrassed and joyful to keep making eye contact with you. “I really love you.” He whispered as his arms started to bend over, his whole body resting on top of yours gently. “More than anything.” And finally, he took your lips into his again with a kiss much more intense.

You decided to simply move your arms upward and hug his neck this time with your arms. You weren’t even pulling him into you, you were just trying to find some shelter under him, especially due to how truly nervous you still felt.

Unfortunately, you didn’t get to appreciate much of Kakavasha’s lips because he wanted to keep going as you allowed him to do so. So, he slowly pulled away from you and slid down to your neck, introducing himself there with a gentle bite in your skin. You couldn’t help but gasp in shock and pleasure and curl your fingers in his locks, your head unconsciously turning aside and giving him more space to savor. As expected, it was your first time ever being touched like this in such a place, so your reactions were way more sensitive and energetic than they should be. You felt like a total virgin under him even if you already had already been introduced to sex multiple times.

Can you really say you’re not a virgin anymore because of that, though?

“This tattoo…” Kakavasha’s tongue was mainly working in one spot of your neck, the tattoo you shared with him, even if his voice sounded so revolted and disgusted at the sight of it. “Do you even realize how strong you actually are, Y/N? This tattoo… It brands you as nothing but a slave… for either labour or pleasure… but you still keep it… and I’ll make sure I’ll give it another meaning.” You couldn’t deny those therapeutic words felt great to listen, and accompanied by the way he bit and licked your muscled skin so gently, made your first moan of his name to escape your mouth.

“Vasha..!” As soon as you pronounced that nickname, he grunted hard under his throat in pure appreciation of what you had moaned.

In previous nights, Kakavasha could never find the courage to tell any of his partners that he had a real name behind ‘Aventurine’, a name he really wished he could hear as a moan throughout the act. And now that he’s finally listening to it, and coming from someone so special to him like you, he couldn’t help but feel like going even deeper into you. He desperately wanted to take your clothes off.

“Fuck…” He cussed, trying to fight his urges back.

He urgently kept sucking and licking the skin around your tattoo, as if he was a wolf eating a piece of fresh meat, for a whole moment, trying to not rush himself with you. He would need to keep putting in his head again and again that you would need a lot of patience and prepare for this, and that he couldn’t just go savage with you, unfortunately. But if it meant he would get the opportunity to finally make love to you, after so many years yearning for any crumb, he would be happy to follow your pace.

When Kakavasha finally felt he’d done enough, he slowly pulled out of you, noticing a big pink mark covering the spot he made out with. He smirked for a quick moment, knowing it would soon turn darker and noticeably brand him there and that he could officially keep going.

He rose his torso slowly, killing his smirk in the process to avoid scaring you, his eyes meeting the sight of you, a hit overstimulated, and giving his arms space to reach the handles of your nightgown.

“May I?” His voice was soft and calm, his fingers brushing your clothes with delicacy.

You weakly nodded with closed eyes. You didn’t want to watch him taking his first look at such an intimate and vital part of you. You didn’t even quite want him to be seeing it in the first place, but you knew it was something necessary… at least for guys. But you were surprised at how resistant you were being with your hesitation. You were not familiar with the feeling having someone taking off your clothes so passionately like this and being so kind with the content behind it, meaning your memories couldn’t really ruin the experience of it or impede Kakavasha from doing it.

When your nude breasts finally popped out, Kakavasha moaned in desire, letting your nightgown rest below them to not make you any more uncomfortable. To control a bit of your anxiety, your hands moved under the pillow your head lied on and held it tight, your legs crushing against each other.

“Aeons… You’re divine…” Kakavasha grunted with an excited smile as he leaned his face down and gave your left boob a lick.

Shivers went down your body when you felt it, a high-pitched moan accompanying it. It felt so different to have a tongue licking your breast and a hand fondling the other with so much love when were used to having them simply squished like a fidget, and your nipples pinched to pain you and take pleasure on it. But once again, Kakavasha contrasted all those memories and replaced it with new ones, and that gave you so much pleasure. He was being so soft and attentive to them, actually trying to savor every corner of them and look for spots that made you feel the most comfortable so he could stimulate you.

“Kakavasha..!” You moaned his full name as you felt slightly overwhelmed with that new, weird pleasure, a hand of yours reaching down to his hand fondling your breast and trying to give him some assistance by guiding it.

You never thought you’d want him to press your breast any harder than he was, and neither did he. He was trying so much to keep his touch as light as a tickling feathers, but he was happy to see you wanting more.

“Is everything okay so far, Y/N?” His eyes looked up to you for that brief moment, but not stopping making out with your nipple. You nodded more quickly than before, wanting him to keep focusing on doing whatever he was doing to you. “Great…” He smiled for a moment before going back all into you.

You arched your back as you felt him start to suck you with the assistance of his tongue twirling around your skin. It obviously aroused him to have you serving yourself for him so voluntarily like that, so much that he had breathe in and out heavily to calm himself down. He even wondered if he was inside a dream all along, but he couldn��t care less about it at this point. He was loving doing that to you.

You were already feeling so cloudy with all that you could barely think about anything else that wasn’t him and his mouth. You couldn’t even decide whether you wanted to help him fondle your boob or help him suck the other. Although you technically could use your other free hand to do the job of holding his head, you didn’t want to lose the comfort of holding the pillow. You knew you’d become unstable and scared if you let it go.

“Hmmmmmm… They feel so good, Y/N…” He grunted, his voice hoarse with satisfaction, in between the sucking. “I wish I could spend a whole day just showing them love…” Kakavasha’s mouth popped out of your breast, quickly moving to give a kitten lick and a smooch on the other one, pushing your and his hand away from it in the process.

Then, he rose his body, kneeling on top of you. He slowly started to unbutton his black and golden shirt from his pijama set, which was already halfway unbuttoned before all of this. You couldn’t deny that seeing him take his clothes off and meeting his nude chest made your heart start beating even faster, as if it was about to pump out of your chest. Was this how he felt seeing your chest too? But it didn’t make sense. You’d seen Kakavasha shirtless before… multiple times, actually. Sometimes when he showered in your shared room and needed to walk back to it, he didn’t mind covering anything above his waist. But you had mostly seen it when he was working. When the heated weather was so severe that he took his shirt off to refresh his body and improve elasticity. You’d even see it a few times when he was dragged back to your cell after punishment, which was almost always physical.

Was is the context of the situation what made you so nervous and turned on with that sight?

He still had the same physique you remembered him to have. Long and slim chest, with slightly worked-out muscles that could only be visible when he made the effort of showing them off. The only difference was the fact he wasn’t painfully slim anymore to the point where his rib cage was visible.

While you kept unconsciously staring at him, he obviously noticed your gaze and he was a bit awkward with it despite having shown his chest to many other women before.

“Y/N.” He woke you up back to reality. “Do you… want to touch me?” He slowly ran his fingers down his chest, trying to seduce you into the act of touching him.

You didn’t want to answer him with words, but your hands definitely did the job of telling him what you wanted.

You didn’t want to touch him a lot. You just wanted to feel the softness of his skin and acknowledge what you were about to deal with. Reassure yourself that there was nothing to fear at this moment.

“Y/N…” He moaned your name when your hand reached his belly and the tip of your fingers slid upwards to his sternum, a hand of his reaching down to his crotch and pressing it down, trying to hide his growing erection from you so you wouldn’t get distracted or scared.

Bu that obviously called your attention and your gaze looked down at it, figuring that he was building a boner unconsciously while you touched him. The more you found yourself closer and closer to the final act of sex, the more you felt nervous, but somehow excited too.

That’s how you found the courage to kneel up on the bed to align with his height and move his hand away from his erection to replace it with yours instead, cupping and caressing it gently, which immediately made him quiver in his spot.

“Y-Y/N!” He moaned more desperately, his hands reaching your shoulders so he could find balance in his position and also feel a bit of you too.

You didn’t say anything to him for an answer, fully flustered and focused on what you were doing. It was hard, as expected, and it felt a bit thick. But you couldn’t deny how uncanny it felt to be holding something you were so repulsive of, especially when it hardened even more with your touch.

In a blink, you pulled your hand away from his pants, creeped out by it after thinking too much about what you were doing. The deeper you went through with this, the more reality hit you, and you didn’t want to face it yet. So you let it go, letting your curiosity about his anatomy consume you.

“S-Sorry…” He whispered shyly, avoiding eye contact with you when he saw your widened, scared eyes.

“N-No… I should be the one apologizing.” Instead of letting your hands rest in the air doing nothing after acting so rude, you decided to rest them in his shoulders. “I just… wanted to feel you, but—… I don’t know how far I can go, Vasha…” His gaze went back to you while you told him how you felt while yours turned away.

He didn’t say anything at first, thinking about what to do with what you said. The more he thought what to say to you, the more his smile died.

“Do you… want to stop..?” He whispered a bit sadly.

And just like he did just now, you remained quiet. It’s not that you wanted to say ‘No’, but you were so reluctant with the future ahead of you. Then it hit you. Another reality hit you. Look how far you’ve gone with him yet. He kissed you, made out with your neck, took off your nightgown, made out with your boobs… the stakes aren’t going to go too higher, are they?

Shit, you had gone so far with him, you didn’t even realize your nightgown had dropped from your belly to your knees because of you sitting up, leaving you singularly with your underwear.

…

He’s been looking at you like this during all this time, and he didn’t even think about saying anything to you, touching you… much less hurting you.

…

Even if you may not like whatever is ahead of you, you were safe, right? If you tell him to stop, he’ll stop, won’t he?

…

“No.” You confidently said, which brought a smile back to his lips along with a chuckle.

“I promise you, it’ll all be ok.” He moved a hand of his up to your cheek, cupping it as gently as you cupped his erection, his head leaning down to whisper in your ear as well. “Lay down for me, Y/N.” His soft voice made your body immediately weaken in submission.

You nodded and slowly let him help you lay down back to your spot in the bed just like you were previously. Kakavasha watched you with lust reflecting in his eyes.

“May I… take this off?” He asked as his hands landed on your hips, his fingers slowly fitting themselves under the side edge of your panties, but still waiting for your full consent.

You had to swallow down all the saliva pooling in your mouth to not pass out with his initiative. And with that move, a bit of your anxiety was also brought down with it, allowing you to relax a bit.

“… Y-Yes…” You mumbled weakly and Kakavasha nodded before finally starting to pull it down.

It was careful, considerate and slow, as you expected from him, but you still could not handle the pressure you truly felt about it.

“W-Wait!” You put a palm in front of your genitalia and shut your legs together before he could fully see it, agonizingly edging him.

Even if he couldn’t see it, the tease of only your hand covering it was almost making him drool with the tease of it. He’s been wanting to have the privilege of miring you like this for all these years you’ve known each other. Of course he was starving to see what was under your hand, but he was so proud of you now that he was wail king to wait for extra 20 years to get to see the flesh uber your hands.

“S-Sorry…” He painfully chose to look away and drop your panties at your knees, resting his hands on the bed instead, although his dick was sucking all the blood from his circulation, begging to keep savoring the view.

For a good moment you just started to breathe all the air that you needed. You were reasonably nervous completely and ashamed. Your body wasn’t pure, it was an object, or at least used as one, left so traumatized it was almost impossible to feel confident looking at it. Your vulva was supposed to be a secret you’d take to your grave, especially what was inside of it. Even your breasts were supposed to be a secret, but the abuse done to your genital had generally been way worse.

What if you weren’t strong enough to resist your discomfort and let yourself go this? What if you decide to stop this, go to sleep, and start pretending this never happened? It would hurt him horribly, wouldn’t it? Especially after you’ve insisted so much about how uncomfortable you felt being a burden to him.

You really don’t want to upset him. You truthfully just want to see him and you thrive together as a duo, either friends or couple and get him away from suicidou-se as much as you can.

Breathing in and out helped you calming down once again. You decided to not stop it. Not yet. You should at least try to let him try. He deserves it, you deserve it. The poor man wasn’t even daring to look at it, only taking a few peeks here and there. At this point, he wasn’t even considering letting himself breathe without your consent.

“If it comforts you… I don’t intend to… put it in yet…” His eyes were truly doing maximum force to not look at you as he talked, but he couldn’t avoid the burning fever in his cheeks at all.

You immediately sighed in relief after hearing that statement.

Although your knowledge of these things is very little for a woman of your age, you knew it was possible to make a woman feel good in multiple ways.

You angled your head down, trying to search for more clarification.

“I-I’ll use my fingers.” He nervously stated when he noticed you were looking at him. “I’ll go slow, of course… I just want to make sure you’re… prepared… for more.” A little grin showed in your lips at his consideration of you in the choice of his words. It was so unnatural, but so calming and important to you, that it successfully managed to get you to ease your trembling body.

“Okay…” It even got you speaking confidently, your middle and ring finger finally dissecting from each other along with your legs, giving him space to see your pussy.

“Aeons.” That was all he could say that was appropriate to your needs, his hands gripping on the sheet as tight as he could.

“D-Don’t stare too much…” You couldn’t bare the pressure of him looking st you anymore, almost shutting your legs in fear.

“I can’t… You’re too beautiful.” He started to crouch closer to your organ, his hands slowly sliding between your thighs to reopen your legs again and give him space to fit his head them.

In quick seconds, you felt a hand of his let go of your thigh and a pair of fingers lay on top your clit and give it a soft squeeze right after, making your legs shiver and squeeze around his head.

“V-Vasha!” You screamed in shock, feeling ticklish with every touch of his.

“You’re so, so beautiful…” His voice was hoarse and lustful as all his attention was dragged down to your pussy, his fingers gently beginning to slide up and down, stopping at your both hole and bit every round to tease them a bit more.

“K-Kakavasha!” You moaned his name again and again, feeling numb with the stimulation he repetitively did to your organ.

“I’m here, Y/N…” He couldn’t wait any longer to give you an orgasm, his middle finger finally beginning to roll into your hole with delicacy.

Once again, it was slow and gentle, but it was enough to make tears form in the back of your eyes from the pleasure. His finger was long, but thin, perfectly resembling a small version of a penis, which was why it felt so bizarre to you, but since it didn’t feel as overwhelming as an actual dick, it managed to make you feel good too. Kakavasha thankfully didn’t dare move after he put it all inside you too, which definitely helped you process the feeling, his eyes staring at yours precisely, waiting for any signs of either consent or comfort.

The sensation of feeling your insides around his finger was tortuous to him. He desperately wanted his aching erection to be inside there and feeling your right walls instead, but he knew he’d have to work for it and he didn’t mind spending hours fingering you for it.

“Y-You don’t need to… wait for me everytime.” You looked down at him again, also wanting to see how the scene of you being fingered looked like.

“Of course I do.” Although his words were a bit firmer this time, his smirk and actions were completely contradictory to his toughness.

He started moving his finger, rubbing it softly on many spots while beginning to set a pace for the amateur thrusting. And surprisingly, he risked a lot of your consent when he decided to suddenly launch his mouth onto your swollen clit too.

Your back arched when you felt him lick your clit up and down, a stingy wave of pleasure hitting you whole. Kakavasha was pushing his own head against your clit like a starved dog, and that forced your fingers to flee from your vulva and find shelter in the pillow again if you wanted to feel more of that.

Visual Link

“W-Wow!” You weren’t really aware it was possible to have both fingers and a mouth working in you like this, and it definitely felt unique.

“You taste so sweet…” His eyes rolled back as the taste of your liquids started lubricating his mouth and fingers, grunting in his throat. “I can’t wait to make you cum, Y/N…” He finally laid the rest of his body in the bed, starting to rub his own erection against the sheets to relieve himself a bit, moaning a bit in the process.

“M-My God..! Kakavasha!” While you moaned in shock and pleasure, Kakavasha simply proceeded to lick you whole in silence, enjoying the moans he got out of your throat.

Due to how drowned his head was onto you, you unfortunately couldn’t see how happy he truly felt to be finally doing this to you and listening to such intimate noises coming from you, mean in that you were liking it. He barely believed it. Some minutes ago, he was ashamed to even look at you and you were so mad at him, but look at where you two are right now.

He was having sex with you.

And just to remember himself that fact made his cock twitch in need for more.

If he could change the past, he’d definitely impede you and him from ever becoming slaves, even if it would probably cost your friendship with him. He always felt anger when he remembered you were a victim of a violation as serious as rape and how much it ruined his chances with you. So he would rather stop you from ever living those days, and see you and himself being happy and normal, especially if it meant it’d be easier for him to bond with you romantically like this.

“P-Please..! More!” You were taken aback and overwhelmed with all his independent work, but enjoying it like a hungry woman, your voice glistening with hunger and lust. You were expecting him to be careful and considerate with you all the time, but you should’ve known this sort of thing isn’t really rehearsed or supposed to be rehearsed at all.

“Of course, sweetheart…” He mumbled on your clit with a chuckle and proceeded to solely focus on licking it up and down repeatedly, immediately started driving you insane. “Tell me… where do you like it more..?” You felt him add a second finger (ring) gently and spin them both around, his digits starting to rub against your walls, exploring every fleshy spot inside you.

“Holy shit!” You screamed with the addition of his finger, your insides almost aching with how he stretched you.

While his fingers took many trips in many different angles and lengths, he suddenly hit you in a spot that made you snap immediately. The wave of pleasure was so intense that it made you jump up and sit down, squeezing his head against your pussy even harder. That was definitely the spot.

“Right there! Right there!” Your hands, that were blew free from the pillow, reached down to his hair and held it for your life, squeezing his locks and trying to grind your hips harder against his head, his nose getting slightly moistened from all the friction.

How could you’ve ever known it felt so good to be touched like this? You didn’t even know such techniques were possible. To have your most sensitive and intimate part being thrusted and sucked so passionately by someone that didn’t feel like a threat, even if you tried to make him feel like one, felt… wonderful.

And obviously, the obedient Kakavasha below you took your command and started particularly thrusting you in that single spot. Sometimes he went for other spots just to give your favorite one a break, but he mainly tortured the spot that you told him to tease.

“V-Vasha..!” Your voice was whimpering hoarsely already, which only made Kakavasha become more and more aroused with the moment even more.

He could even swear he felt a string of pre-cum release from his tip and run down his cock, wetting his boxers a bit in pure desperation for release.

“Yes… Keep saying my name… please…” His eyes were glossy with pleasure just like you, even if he was technically receiving none.

“Kakavasha!” You spoke his name more confidently, and it definitely pleased his ears.

It pleased him so much that he used his other free hand, who’s been in your thigh all this time, to hook both your legs together and push them forward, giving himself more space to eat you out. His hips were also trying to grind even rougher on the sheets below him, trying to find more relief during this moment that was torturing him so badly. But he definitely did not want to spoil himself. He wanted to preserve his release entirely for the moment he was inside you, especially to use it as fuel to fuck you good. If he can possibly make you like having sex, and make you like it enough to keep wanting to do it with him, he’ll definitely take the opportunity. He should’ve really gambled on this long time ago. Why didn’t he? Why would you say ‘no’ back then? He never did anything to make you want to say ‘no’ to him. The chances of you saying ‘yes’ to him were quite big… They’ve always been big. He’ll forever blame himself for wasting all this precious time and energy away, but not too much. It has been always hard for him to tell what’s going through your mind, ever since you two were slaves, especially for things like this, so it was hard for him to find courage to flirt with you.

Why even keep thinking about these angsty moments? They’re all paying off right now.

“Kakavasha, I feel weird…” Your words felt like a switch to him, making him stop masturbating you immediately.

“Do you want me to sto—”

“For God’s sake! Why would you stop?!” You pushed his mouth back to your clit with your hands in complete desperation before the building momentum inside you could fade away, and he immediately switched back to obeying you.

You made him smile with that plea. It’s as if he was falling even more in love with you at this moment.

“S-Sorry! I-I think I’m going to cum, that’s all!” You finally finished saying what you had in mind, going back to your normal hoarse tone.

And if you thought Kakavasha couldn’t go any tougher with you, his fingers started thrusting you faster, digits endlessly and singularly teasing your weak spot now while his tongue kept twirling your clit.

“Cum for me, then… Cum in my mouth, Y/N…” He became slightly desperate for your release when you warned him of it, blinded with lust and desire to feel your very essence raining on his tongue for him to taste while you’re feeling heavenly amounts of pleasure.

“I’m close..! I’m so… close..!” You kept warning him over and over, your mouth trembling with weak whimpers coming out of it.

And when your womb finally snapped, you managed to warn him, but you stopped talking afterwards due to the shock, your body throwing itself on the bed so it could fully process all the pleasure that was taking over your senses. It was more immense than you expected from all that build-up, and Kakavasha fiercely took it all, switching his fingers and mouth’s position, his tongue thrusting inside you so it could take your orgasm inside him and fingers circling your clit to prolong your climax. His reaction was simple. He simply angled his eyes upwards and enjoyed the view of you worming in the bed, paradisiacal under his touch, while moaning inside your pussy in arousal of feeling you drip in his tongue. He didn’t he could feel this good making you feel good.

After a few seconds, when it was unfortunately over, you gasped hard and finally stopped screaming, eyes darting at the rooftop exhausted while he still did the job of licking you clean and drinking all your cum. You were finally gaining your lost consciousness back after such intense moment that took some of it away, and Kakavasha obviously took your relaxation as a sign for him to pull out. So, while he gulped down your precious essence and sucked on his fingers to clean them, he took his mouth off of you, a ‘pop’ noise accompanying it.

Neither of you said anything for a few seconds, simply breathing in and out. Kakavasha also had to recover a bit from spending so much time breathing warm air and drowning in your wetness.

“Y/N…” He crawled up to you again and leaned down, his forehead almost touching yours. “Can we… keep going..?” His voice remained soft and calm, barely above a whisper.

“Yes…” At least, you were feeling way more sure and aafe about all of this after this orgasm. You didn’t even take a moment to think before answering, and that made Kakavasha a bit happy.

“I want nothing but you to make you feel good.” He leaned a bit upwards, which allowed him to remove his hands from the sheets and reach down to his pants to start taking them off and freezing his pushing erection.

You decided to follow his actions and looked down at his shaft, only to regret it immediately and raise your chin against to stare at the roof.

Oh, yeah… that.

That monstrous thing that has abused you so many times and looked so ugly and evil. The memories of seeing those did not make you feel good, it actually made you rethink what you had said earlier.

You closed your eyes. You should not take your words back now… not yet. It’s not fair to him. Kakavasha can’t control his sex the same way you can’t too, so don’t blame him for being forced to have something you don’t like.

“Is everything okay?” He asked while getting completely naked just like you were.

“Yes… I just don’t wanna… look at it… if you don’t mind.” You turned your face away from him, although it didn’t change the blackness your eyes mired.

“Of course I don’t mind it.” He replied gently, finding your reaction cute.

The room went a quiet after he talked since Kakavasha still needed to get rid of his pants hanging on his knees and also your underwear that was still hanging to your legs all this time. But even after he was done with that and finally readied himself between your legs, leaning his face close to yours, he stopped moving entirely and sighed.

“I think it would be better for you if you put it in yourself, Y/N. It feels weird for me to put it in whenever I want to when you look so nervous like that. I don’t want to scare you.” His voice sounded a bit worried and defeated seeing how you were acting under him, all stiff and anxious.

“N-No, please… I’ll be ok… I really just don’t wanna look at it… B-But I’m ok with you taking the lead here… I don’t think I can do it anyway…” You laughed it off, trying to calm him down, and it seemed to work since you heard him chuckle.

“Are you sure, Y/N?” He asked again, a hand of his moving down to hold your hips and holding it for prepare, but the grip was absolutely soft.

“Yes, Vasha.” You nodded, forcing your expression to soften to make him less resentful of beginning the act while your hands crawled back under the pillow.

And slowly, he started to take action. You squeaked when you felt him guide his fleshy tip to your wet lips, gently opening its passage, while also pulling your waist closer to it go help him with the penetration. The more he went inside and filled the emptiness of your inner walls, the more he slowed down, even more when you expressed discomfort with your face or voice. But he didn’t want to stop moving. The hug of your walls around him felt too good for him to not keep going deeper. After all, Kakavasha’s mouth dropped more and more the more he watched his cock disappear into you, finalizing with a loud groan when the skin of his hips finally slapped against yours and his head curled down until your foreheads were touching again.

“Shhhhh… It’s over.” He whispered, kissing your forehead gently while immediately dropping his hands from your hips and his dick to interact with you. “It’s ok… You’re ok.” You felt a group of fingers reach the top of your head and twirl with your locks, beginning to caress your scalp with the tip of his fingers smoothly.

You were overwhelmed once again. It felt weird but it felt good, it felt eerie but it felt genuine, you felt threatened, but you also felt safe. The uncertainty of I made you open your eyes very slowly for caution, meeting Kakavasha breathing with his mouth open, as if he was trying to control himself, while staring deeply at you eyes.

“Are you ok, Y/N?” The mere fact he made that question to made you feel better. It felt warm to be so considered like this in such a difficult moment.

“Y-Yes…” Your hands creeped up to hug his shoulders from behind, looking forward to bond you two together.

But Kakavasha immediately took as a sign to lay his forearms in the bed and press his whole body against yours. He groaned deep once again as he felt your breasts rub against his torso, and the way your back arched, making the contact even harder between your chests, made him even more desperate. But what really mattered to him was the way you were scratching his shoulders and back. He’d let you discount whatever you needed on him, even if he started to bleed.

“S-Sorry… I can’t stay silent about this, Y/N. You feel good. Really fucking good.” Kakavasha suddenly confessed with a hoarse voice, feeling horrible about telling you such a dirty thing, but unable to hold it back.

“T-Thank you.” You quietly mumbled back a bit embarrassed. Although you appreciated his comment, you didn’t feel like complimenting him back… because it wasn’t really reciprocal.

It didn’t feel bad, but it didn’t feel amazing either. It felt just like you remembered it to feel, but at the same time you knew this wasn’t abuse. You felt paralyzed and a bit uncomfortable, but maybe if you let him move, this will start to feel better.

“Y-You can move… slowly.” You warned him and he nodded, but didn’t immediately follow your order.

Instead he gave you a quick kiss on your cheek and forehead first, and then he started moving.

God, it felt even weirder to have him moving. At least that’s how you felt in the beginning. But when you realized he was being so attentive to your reactions and his slow, smooth pace, you felt safe again. You did not know how good it felt to be heard in an activity like this, nor how good it could feel when someone was actually searching for what made you feel pleasure. It was still bizarre, but in its own unique way, where you could still feel a bit good with him pulling out and pushing back, and Kakavasha was obviously enjoying it more than you.

“Fuck…” Kakavasha cussed out of relief, his cheeks burning in a bright red tone as he felt your walls tightening him.

Kakavasha could seriously pass out at any moment right now. You had no idea how excited he was truly feeling about this. How much he wanted to fuck you faster, praise you with thousands of words, and touch you in so many places. He wanted to do this with you for the whole night. He just wants to show you what you deserve, but he knew being that touchy and hypnotized would most likely turn you off, so he’d rather not gamble. He’ll take it slow and wait for your approval for him to keep going.

“Vasha…” And to watch your face and body contorting with pleasure under him and mire his own dick disappearing inside you every few seconds was even more addicting to him.

He couldn’t believe he was actually inside you at this moment. These mushy walls he was savoring belong to you, not some random prostitute. It was your voice who was calling his name. It was your love he was receiving. Shit. If he thinks about it too much he’ll cum in a blink and he doesn’t want that. But just for the sake of reassurance, he looked down at where you two were connected and saw what he expected to see. Your vulva stretched apart to receive him, and his cock going inside it. It felt really great. So great it made him feel more confident about this and so great he had to stop looking if he didn’t want to cum yet.

“Y/N…” He was obviously moaning way more than you, both in volume and frequency. “I love you so much… This feels amazing— Ah! Shit…” He proceeded to word every thought that came to his mind.

But when he said he wanted to prioritize you, he truly meant it. His noises might make it seem like he was prioritizing his own pleasure, but those weren’t even the loudest he could be. They were just a slight representation of how good he felt even when he wasn’t the focus. A slight representation how great he felt making you feel wonderful.

His head slid down and landed by your side, moaning on your neck instead of the whole room while also making out with it again, trying to listen to you more than himself and make you a bit more comfortable with his moves. Maybe the amount of noises he emitted scared you, so he’d avoid it.

Now, you were back at staring the roof again, free of his piercing gaze landing upon you. You used that moment to reflect, taking advantage of Kakavasha melting down into you to think about it with less guilt. You were feeling horrible about yourself and your thoughts at this moment. It did not feel as good as promised by nature. There could still be hope to this somewhere, but this is not for you. All you were feeling right now is discomfort. You were many times pinned down like this, only to be invaded and abused. Even if it was Kakavasha who was doing it, and despite all his consideration, your brain couldn’t help but keep warning you about rape every second, leaving no space for relaxation or comfort. That length inside you was the thing that once traumatized you, that scarred you for life, physically and mentally, and you were letting it in again. For what? To make you hate it even more? But you allowed him to do so much to you and you promised this to him. His hopes are set sky-high. Do you really want to ruin them?

And, well… there are still some positive sides to this, isn’t there? Hugging him feels warming, hearing him moan and call your name feels like a romance movie… but the main point of this whole act did not.

…

…

At least… it was Kakavasha, your most-trusted friend, who was doing this to you. He would never do this without your consent, would he? If you said ‘no’ to that first kiss of his, you two would be sleeping right now, wouldn’t you? If you said ‘no’ right now, he’d stop, wouldn’t he? Kakavasha is feeling depressed and suicidal. That’s what is making you keep yourself there and let him do what he wants to do with you. All you want is to see him getting better and yourself to live without fearing he’ll try to attempt against his own life again. Even if it costs a bit of your well-being, your own comfort, another scar that’d make you hate this even more… you wanted to do this for him… after all he’s done to you.

So you closed your eyes, and started thinking about other things unrelated to all of this, hoping it would distract you from it until it was over. And obviously, you hoped it would all end soon.

…

…

“Y-Y/N..!”

…

…

…

“A-Ah… Hmmm…”

…

…

…

“Aeons… I love you so much, Y/N…”

…

…

…

“You feel so fucking warm… so tight…”

…

…

“Gonna take care of you—! Ah… Every time you want me to…”

…

…

…

…

…

“You’re breathtaking, Y/N… This tattoo is nothing compared to you…”

…

…

…

…

“Y/N…”

…

…

“Y/N..?”

…

…

…

…

…

…

..?

What?

Why did he—

You opened your eyes again, only to meet Kakavasha’s face on top of yours again, staring at you visibly disappointed and his body immobile.

“You’re not enjoying it, are you?” He asked, but before a single syllable could leave your mouth, he sighed and spoke first, a bit angrier this time. “I told you, Y/N. You’ll never like this. It’s not part of your nature anymore.” His gaze was serious and heavy, forming a knot on your throat. “I appreciate it, but I don’t want to force you to do this, nor do I want you to force yourself to do this.” He turned away, slowly starting to pull his length out of you.

Wow. That hit you hard.

After all these steps you’ve taken, after all the time he spent preparing you, after all the expectations he’d created, his entire confidence was crushed in a matter of seconds. You must’ve actually worsened his well-being instead of making it better as you intended to. Looking at his eyes, seeing all its shine disappear along with his excitement broke your heart.

It made you feel… embarrassed.

You can’t leave him like this. You can’t just fool him like that. It didn’t feel right. You shouldn’t end things like this.

His insecurity sparked you. That one last hope you had in the back of your mind, but didn’t want to risk yet, was paining to be risked now.

“… No.” You intended that to be said in your mind, but it left your mouth, and Kakavasha noticed it.

“Wha—?” He didn’t catch what you said, so he looked back at you for a quick moment, only to be surprised by you launching yourself upwards and rushing your lips against his.

At first he didn’t react, after all, it was your lips against his, but then he quickly remembered how forced you felt to be doing this, and started to fight back.

“Y/N, you don’t have to—” He pushed you away with his hands, but you acted quick and grabbed both of his wrists.

You took them away from your body and pushed him instead. And for his shock, you surprisingly didn’t stop there. Using all your strength, you forced both your bodies to turn around, switching positions, and used your weight to push him down against the bed, sitting right on top of his belly.

Kakavasha could’ve fought you back, after all, he was stronger than you and your moves were quite slow, but he didn’t want to. He was shocked but didn’t feel threatened at all. He was rather curious. That’s why he simply chose to stare at you in confusion after he was laid down.

Why were you doing this? Why were you going so far for something you didn’t even enjoy? You didn’t have to do this for hm.

“What is wrong with you?!” You couldn’t help but grip his wrists tighter in revolt, trying to stop the growing tears in the back of your eyes from falling down and mess up your voice and face. “You were willing to gamble your success with our master when we were slaves… knowing failure would bring you death… You were willing to gamble your success and even mine in the IPC with Jade, despite neither of us having any experience with this type of work… You’re willing to gamble millions of Credits in our casino daily… or your own life away… But you’re not willing to gamble on this with me..?” You were slightly breathless after spitting out all that scolding, so you had to pause for a moment to recover your breath, which also gave him an opportunity to answer you, but he didn’t take it. “What is the matter with you?! Why do you underestimate me so much?!” And unfortunately, you tears couldn’t be held back anymore. They were too strong.

Kakavasha’s eyes squinted, almost shutting down seeeing your distress.

“S-Sorr—”

“Shut up! Shut up, shut up, shut up!” Kakavasha went mute after this, only his hard breathing emitting noise. “Yes, I was not enjoying it, ok?! But why do you insist with this bullshit of ‘my nature’ to me?! Since when are you this pessimistic about me?! Has it always been like this?!” You had to pause again for oxygen while he pathetically stared at you. “Does it not go through your head that maybe it’s something else?! I want to try it, for God’s sake!” You pulled your hands away and started clearing your tears. “You just… You just pulled an orgasm out of me… but you believe I’m not capable of facing more..?!” More tears fell from your eyes from the slight disappointment you were feeling, while he didn’t blink once.

Kakavasha didn’t answer anything, as expected from him after your order, but now you wanted to take it back.

“Say something!” You cried out, your voice slightly breaking while you removed your hands from his wrists to wipe your face.

…

…

Kakavasha’s muscles finally seemed to start relaxing, his gaze softening, his eyes thankfully blinking again and a smile slightly forming in his pink lips.

You felt something poke your buttocks. You actually have been feeling it since the moment you sat on him. But now it was completely annoying you. So you decided to look behind you and check it, only to meet his dick, that had hardened again, and enough to be standing straight and rubbing against your skin. It was begging you to do something with it.

“Use me.” You suddenly heard him mumble, your head spinning back to him pay attention to him.

“Huh?” You were still whiny and even more lost now.

“I said… Use me. You’re right… I’m a hypocrite… I’m nothing but a stupid, hypocrite bastard.” He paused for a second, his hands moving up to grip the pillow where his head laid just like you did. “I shouldn’t think of you like this. I should’ve never thought of you like this. So, please, use me. Use me as you please. Even ruin me if you see fit. I’ll let you do anything to me right now. Anything that’ll make you forgive me for my stupidness… for making you waste your precious tears away like this… I won’t touch you once, I won’t thrust you once, I won’t even look at you if you want me to. I’m yours tonight, Y/N. All fucking yours.” His dick pulsed a few times as he said such dirty words, desperate to be inside you again, his voice lacing with sadistic amusement and you couldn’t deny the little butterflies kicking your stomach too.

“Don’t speak of yourself like this.” You said a bit more firmly, finally finishing your task of clearing your tears away from your cheeks. “You’re not… a toy.” You reflected yourself on him as you said that, shaking your head to forget those thoughts before they consumed you again. “I-I’m not doing this because I want to… use you… Don’t… ever word it like that.” He immediately nodded like an obedient dog as you gave him those limits.

“Of course…” He talked to you as if you were a queen, even if a real queen would never act so scaredy like you were. You were still a bit nervous to engage in this activity, especially now that you were the one in control. But your body has been successfully turned on again, along with him. That was the perfect opportunity for you to try again.

So you lifted your hips, one of your hands going down to hold and align his dick with your moistened hole, and slowly slide it inside you entirely, your back arching upwards as you felt him consume you to the hilt again. He still felt overwhelmingly sized inside you, despite you having already tried it.

Wait, had you just touched his actual dick? You looked at it, you acknowledged it and its hungry state, then you proceeded to hold it with your hand, when you’ve been doing your best to avoid interacting with it in any way. Were you really feeling that safe around Kakavasha? Enough to touch something you disgusted so much? Wow… it surprised you how much this man managed to change you.

“Hmmmmm… Y/N…” Kakavasha was smiling in a weird way, as if he was enjoying this more than he was supposed to, but wasn’t scared to show his creepy devotion to you.

After all, it fueled you to start hopping in a weak, slow pace, causing the man to start moaning immediately while your hands rested on his belly to help you hop. His hands held the pillow tightly, and his head arched upwards in pure ecstasy.

This time, it didn’t feel so weird. Was it the position you were in what scared you before? Because now that you were the one setting the pace and making Kakavasha take you, no feeling of danger consumed you.

Perhaps you could finally say you were enjoying it.

“Y/N! Oh, Y/N…” Kakavasha moaned your name like a desperate prayer over and over again, his chest lifting up and down heavily to breathe in enough oxygen to take you.

Kakavasha wasn’t used to being the one who follows the rhythm. He was very ready to be the one guiding you, not the other way around. But at the same time, he loved it. He could see such a privileged view of your whole body on top of him and it looked so beautiful. Your pussy spread to receive his cock, your hips swaying on it and making it disappear into you, your boobs jiggling, and your face and vocal chords expressing so much pleasure. You looked like a work of art, the kind that deserves to be hanged at the museum, but unfortunately he couldn’t enjoy you more than that. He promised himself that he wouldn’t influence you and your choices, and it was starting to weigh on his pleasure.

He promised you all he’d do is receive what you have for him, so he couldn’t do nothing but drool with the view of you while his heart and cock ached for more physical touch.

“Vasha…” You groaned his name before starting to speed up your rhythm a bit, finally getting better used to him and his size.

“Yes, Y/N… I’m here!” He made to sure to reply just in case you weren’t saying his name out of pleasure, and to communicate instead. “How do you feel, hum..? Any better?” He was still a bit insecure this whole act, especially how to interpret your movements and noises.

“I feel good… I definitely feel better.” You decided to move your hands a bit upwards, feeling more of Kakavasha’s torso rather than his belly, and he immediately liked to see that coming from you.

“You do..? Good…” He proceeded to go back to moaning repeatedly, eyes working hard to keep themselves open and savor the view.

His balls felt so heavy with all the stimulation that they were itching. And knowing that he wasn’t even feeling the most pleasure he could feel tortured him even more. It only showed to him how you made everything feel so much better, despite being an inexperienced newbie at it. He’s had so many other women riding him, way more professionally, but none of them made him feel so horny and hungry like this. Was he this terribly addicted to you? Enough to overshadow every other experience he’s had?

He couldn’t keep himself so caged under you like this. It was too tortuous for him.

“Y-Y/N… I’m sorry… but I need to tell you how much I— ah! How much I want to touch you right now… S-Sorry..! I know I promised you t-that I wouldn’t… but this is too much for me.!” Kakavasha turned his face away and closed his eyes, expecting the worst reaction out of you. “Only your hips… I’ll only touch your hips…” Kakavasha’s eyes froze on your hips, looking at them like a raw, bloody piece of meat.

“F-Fine… Be gentle…” You decided to give in to him and leaned down, pressing your whole body against his while your hands went to the sides of his head, which immediately made him groan loudly.

Obviously, Kakavasha’s hands snapped to your hips and gripped on them tight, not enough to hurt you, of course. His moans became slightly more high-pitched with the feeling of holding your hips and the stimulation of your breasts pressing against his chest. As expected, he didn’t quite exactly keep his hands there. The closure of your faces now made it irresistible for him to not launch his mouth on yours and seal you Hoth with a messy, wet kiss, and his fingers were brushing your hips up and down, sometimes going as far to your buttocks or scratching your spine, but those didn’t bother you at all. If anything, they made you feel desired.

“You’re so perfect, Y/N..!” He broke the kiss only to say those words and immediately go after your neck next.

And, once again, he begun making out with your cursed tattoo and whispering sweet words directly to your ear, freeing a hand of your hips to push your head harder onto him so he could reach your neck with ease.

“You’re such a brave, powerful woman, Y/N…” He licked your skin with delicacy, his voice as sweet as honey against your ear, warming the air around it.

“S-Stop… teasing me..!” Your voice didn’t leave your throat any louder than a whisper, lingering with exhaustion and overstimulation.

“I’m not teasing you… I’m just telling you the mere truth… You’re amazing, Y/N. You’ve evolved from a slave, to a secretary, and finally to a Stoneheart on your own, and I’ve been proudly accompanying you ever since Step 1… admiring and loving every cell of yours every fucking second. Only Aeons knows how much I want you to keep riding me like this… I want to do this with you the whole night… Just you and me… fucking each other like this…” Kakavasha giggled in your ear as he felt pleasure from feeling his heart weigh lighter after confessing all that dirty stuff, those darker desires of his, his cock aching for his orgasm that was slowly rising to its peak, while you had the contrary effect.

His poetry completely overstuffed you with love, joy and passion, making it harder for your heart to process it all and keep beating as it was. Even if they were risky words to say to someone as sensible as you, they only made your swollen clit throb for more of them. Without this, you would never know that you had such a like for dedication, especially an exaggerated one like this. Could it possibly be what people call a ‘kink’? Because all you felt was your muscles weakening on top of him, and your heart almost pumping out of your chest in exhaustion.

“C-Can’t… do this anymore..!” You whimpered, your hips almost fully stopping to move, nails clawing at the sheets for your dear life.

“W-Want some help..?” He couldn’t help but already begin moving a bit to not lose the momentum happening between you two and fly both his hands back to your hips, preparing to help you in case you said ‘Yes’.

“P-Please..!” As soon as he heard you plead for his help so breathlessly beautiful like that, he immediately snapped. In a second, you felt his legs spread farther away from each other, and his hips thrusting upward, causing you to scream in slight shock.

Although having all the control of the intercourse gave you a lot of comfort and reassurance of yourself and your actions, you didn’t expect it to feel even better when he was the one acting again. It still felt like you had more power than him, even if that wasn’t quite true anymore. You were sitting down so peacefully with freedom to move everywhere while he wetted the bed with his sweat and suffocated in that strained position that didn’t favor him at all, not even with his precise thrusts. The position did really matter for someone like you, didn’t it? Unlike Kakavasha, that did not once seem uncomfortable with this.

Visual Link

Kakavasha’s pace was way faster than yours and was a bit more brutal too. He seemed to be trying to specifically hit you in a specific spot compared to the rest of your walls… your g-spot.

“Oh, my God!” You screamed with tears hanging in the corner of your eyes again, your head arching upwards again to let all your voice out of your throat, letting Kakavasha stare at your broken face.

“It’s here, isn’t it..?” He smirked with lingering arousal, stopping his rhythm for a moment to grind in your g-spot and torture it until he found it.

“F-Fuck!” The way a heavy wave of pleasure was sent through your whole body from your womb made you whine in satisfaction. “Y-Yes! Right there! It’s right there!” Kakavasha immediately unpaused his thrusts when he got your confirmation.

Your body was panicking with the spanking he did at your g-spot, stimulation taking over your senses and turning you into that hungry animal. At least he was acting as animalistic as you, even worse, if you could be honest. You could even feel a remarkable feeling in the back of your womb… that same exact growing burn you felt in the back of your womb that you just felt while he ate your pussy out, specifically when you were about to have your orgasm.

“Is it too much, Y/N..?” Not even he knew how his masochism and desire for you wasn’t taking over his mind right now. Fucking your pussy, so tight, sloppy and warm for being untouched for so long, like that was truly breaking his mind bit by bit.

“N-No! Keep going! I-I think I’m close!” Kakavasha smiled at that warning, and he obviously didn’t dare stop thrusting you in that speed.

If anything, you could even say he started to go faster. So fast he was almost slipping out of your hole every time he pulled up, but his focus thankfully managed to keep himself into you all the time.

It was everything. You and him, after so many years fighting together, befriending each other, becoming familiar with each other, now bonding in a way that you two never dared to. The intimacy, skin to skin, eye to eye, mouth to mouth… It wasn’t the average sex Kakavasha would experience on his own, or the abuse done to you.

It was love. A kind of love, so passionate and strong, that was making your past fears look like nothing but an annoying piece of dust. One that Kakavasha never got to express and was now vomiting it all and almost losing his consciousness for. One that was so new to you, but was truly taking you to heaven.

“To think that… I wouldn’t be experiencing this if I was dead right now… It kills me, Y/N..!” His voice broke in a few syllables while he moaned and babbled, his smile dying due to the heavy feeling of guilt in his heart when he reminded himself of that.

“Shhh, shhh…” You put a palm on top of his mouth so he could stop ruining the mood. “It’s ok, Vasha… We all make mistakes, and I forgive you… I definitely forgive you…” You tried talking the sweetest you could, although it was hard to keep your noises in the back of your throat and impede them from breaking your calm tone.

“But I was going to die, Y/N..! I was going to kill myself… and leave you behind..! And I still… I still think about i—!” He insisted on talking even if you had tried to shut him up.

“Stop talking, Kakavasha…” You spoke in a more serious tone, and Kakavasha almost went against you, but you spoke before he could. “Just focus on me, ok..? I’m here… I’m right here.” Those words sent shivers down on Kakavasha’s spine, immediately falling for your seduction while his dick pulsed for more of you.

You were right. You were right there for him, and he couldn’t get enough of you. You could keep rising the stakes, but it’d never be enough for his desire for more of you, for an impossible amount of pleasure coming from you and him. But at least he was getting to express some of it— no, most of it with you right now, and he was not going to stop until you reached another orgasm.

“Make me cum like you said you wanted me to, Kakavasha…” You quickly leaned down just to kiss him on his tattoo to intentionally turn his mind off from those thoughts, and you successfully got him to snap.

Kakavasha sat up, forcing you to kneel on top of him again. His thrusts became erratical, making you throw your head behind your shoulders.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck… Please, let me cum too—! Ah! Please, please, please, please…” Kakavasha buried his face on your shoulder, his hands almost turning the bones of your hips into dust.

“Of course you can, Kakavasha…” You simply hugged him back, clawing your fingernails on his back so harshly it made him hiss in pain.

“I want to make you cum with me too… I want to see it… Your face, your body… I want to hear the noises that you do… Please tell me you’re close!” His voice was so high-pitched that you wondered if he’d gone insane already.

“I am, Vasha… I’m almost there..!” Your vice eas also going more high-pitched then the usual due to the closure of your orgasm.

“P-Please.. let me lay you down… I-It won’t last long, I promise, I just want us to cum as soon—” You got tired of him of trying to explain every thought in his mind midway and decided to take over.

“Do it.” Kakavasha’s eyes widened with shock at your dedication, but also shone brighter than before. In less than one second, you were thrown in the bed, close to he edge of it, so the momentum wouldn’t be lost, not in the slightest.

For the next seconds, you and Kakavasha simply focused on staring deep down at each other while he completely bottomed his entire length inside you every thrust, in search of that blissful orgasm he looked for.

Visual Link

He looked so beautiful above you, all sweaty and wasted, but still working his hardest to make you feel pleasure. Kakavasha also thought you looked hypnotizing under him, but the difference between you and him was that he looked at you way dirtier than you did. He was looking at your swollen, soaked pussy taking him in, then raising his eyes to your bouncing boobs, then to your sweaty face and open mouth emitting such beautiful noises. In the back of his mind, he wanted to fuck you all night in many different places and positions. He wanted to hear your dirtiest moans and tell you his dirtiest wishes while he had you under him looking just like that.

But before he could enjoy any more of you, the arousal of seeing you under made him orgasm snap prematurely, way before than he expected it to come.

“F-FUCK!” Kakavasha groaned with a deep voice before suddenly stopping with his thrusts and start to yelp like crazy.

He was screaming, body quivering and shivering entirely as his dick started ejaculating. Your orgasm followed his orgasm a few seconds later, and it was definitely another shocker to you. You weren’t expecting it to be so much more breathtaking than the last one. Maybe the build-up to this one or the connection between you two was what made your body burn with so much more fever. Screams obviously came out of your mouth, accompanying Kakavasha’s screams even louder than him, also including the hook of your nails that dug so deep in his back that it could make him bleed.

“Yes, that’s it— Fuck!” Kakavasha tried keeping control so there was some guidance in the situation but Kakavasha was also having the hardest orgasm of his life, and it was hard to resist when he knew it was all being spilled inside you.

It was too much ecstasy for the both of you, and this moment of climax lasted incredibly long.

Obviously, the intensity of the moment couldn’t be increased and only decreased, so soon enough, you and Kakavasha were simply panting messes looking at each each other. So weak that his arms couldn’t hold himself above you for too long and they broke, pressing his body against yours.

Neither of you knew what to say to each other, the way your bodies curled onto each other and made physical contact was enough to express everything either of you had to say. This was a great night. You completely renewed your limits and learned new things about sex, improving your knowledge about it too, while for Kakavasha, this was casually the best fucking night of his life. Fuck suicide. He got you to have sex with him. This completely restored his hormones, and would definitely weigh positively in his mental health. He was so happy he didn’t even want to let go or pull out. Feeling you hug and caress his back after hurting it so bad, crawling his fingers under you to caress your back too, shove his head between your shoulder and neck and feeling your inner walls still moisten his length was a contact that he desperately craved for.

“Y/N…” Things were finally becoming normal again.

“Kakavasha…” Ignoring the fact that you two couldn’t really call each other ‘friends’ anymore…

“How do you… How do you feel..?” He finally had enough strength again to push himself upward and stare at your face again while unfortunately pulling himself out, his soaked dick feeling the sharp cold of the room’s temperature.

“Hmmmm… Weird…” You shrugged your shoulders, and you noticed Kakavasha’s eyes widen a bit, as if he was about to have a heartbreak. Luckily, you were just kidding with him. “…ly good.” You giggled at his reaction, and his cheeks simply flushed with embarrassment at being so easily fooled.

“You..!” He tried scolding you, but he had zero negative energy to do that. “You promise..?” But he was still a bit insecure, and needed a clear confirmation.

“Yes.” You nodded, attempting to begin getting out, but his arms were weighting really hard in the sheets.

“I hate to say this… but I would really like to keep going…” He looked away from you and paused for a moment. “I could bring you to paradise all night… teach you more about this… let you experiment more… whatever you want…” But there was a little smile in his face, lingering with hope. “So… round two?” Although you weren’t a fan of guys flirting with you, having Kakavasha doing it sounded funny, real, romantic and intuitive. “P-Please, don’t get me wrong… I’m already very happy and satisfied, I just still have energy in me to keep going… If you don’t want a second round, you can just say ‘No’ to me and I’ll be completely fine.” His eyes looked anywhere else, but avoided your face the most they could.

“I don’t know, Vasha…” You replied a bit unenthusiastically, trying to think about it, but Kakavasha didn’t give you much time.

“Alright, then… No need to worry or overthink it. You did absolutely amazing tonight…” He suddenly pulled you and him upwards, only to throw himself in the pillows again, bringing you with him.

When you two landed, Kakavasha immediately pushed you out of his lap, laying you down beside him just like you two were before all of this and layering the sheets on top of you. He was staring at you passionately, cheeks flushing and a grin in his lips that resembled a little kid in love.

“Aeons, you look beautiful like this…” You couldn’t help but feel embarrassed at his compliment and pull the sheets closer to you after he said those, trying to stop from saying any better things to you.

It was your first time ever showing him your nudity, and looking at him fully naked indeed, and his words didn’t make it any easier to keep yourself naked for the whole night of staring at him nude all night.

“Stop…” You mumbled while avoiding looking at his violet eyes, who were still shining with satisfaction.

“How can I?” He also decided to cover himself with the sheets too, and now that you two had censored your bodies from each other, you could make eye contact again. “You’re the perfect sight for sore eyes.” He reached a hand out, pushing a strand of your hair behind your ear.

You simply smiled awkwardly in response, letting him keep fixing your hair.

Despite the moment being wholesome, you were really going back to your previous thoughts before this, when you were scolding Kakavasha for his attempt against his own life. Your thoughts about it came back even spicier now due to what he almost said while you were riding him.

“But I was going to die, Y/N..! I was going to kill myself… and leave you behind..! And I still… I still think about i—!”

So he really still thinks about it? Even if you just tried your best to give him a reason to not? Why? Wasn’t this enough to make him at least reconsider it? You don’t want him to die. He doesn’t deserve to die and rest in peace for the rest of eternity. He deserves to live and prosper, whether if it’s with you or not, after all the things he went through.

So, meanwhile you allowed him to play with your hair, you took advantage of his distraction to speak about the big unspoken elephant in the room.

“Kakavasha.” You called him pretty seriously, and he looked at you without realizing your serious expression. “Do you really still think about killing yourself?” You spoke seriously, referring to suicide harshly so it’d trigger him to remember what he said and engage in the conversation truthfully with you.

His hands froze in their place, still resting in your hair, as he heard ask such a question in such an invasive tone, looking at you a bit shocked and confused.

“Promise me you’ll never attempt suicide again, Kakavasha.” Although his mouth was quiet and reluctant to talk, his widened eyes looking away from you what you needed to know. “I’m serious.” You completed yourself, trying to appeal to his empathy with you and your trust in him.

He didn’t answer initially, looking at many different corners that weren’t you and not face your piercing gaze, but you were determined to keep pressuring him to at least give you an answer, even if it was a lie or a mere syllable. But the more he thought about it, the less he wanted to talk about it with you, as if he was uncomfortable. Since it’s easy for someone like you to identify discomfort, you quickly realized it and decided to accommodate to it, hopping a little closer to him and revolving your hands around his waist to hug it.

“Things will get better, Kakavasha. I can assure you that.” You laid your head harder against his chest very close to his heart, feeling his accelerated heartbeat echo in your ear.

He still didn’t say anything, and instead just circled his own arms around your head like a leech and went back to fidgeting with your hair, but a bit more stressed this time.

“I want to be your lover, Y/N.” He whispered with an anxious tone, afraid of his own words, while they simply surprised you. “I want to be your boyfriend, o-or your husband… or at least… someone you’ll never ever abandon.” He shoved his face in your neck again, breathing your skin as if he needed it to live.

“I’d never abandon you, Kakavasha. But I… can’t accept being your lover.” His eyes shrunk with tears glossing them as he heard that rejection, his heart aching and throbbing for your love. “Not only I’ve lost some of my trust in you, but I don’t think I’d be a good girlfriend.” He immediately rose his head and tried to argue back, but you flew your hand to slap his mouth shut before he could say anything. “I know what you want to say, but, trust me, Vasha, if I were to become your girlfriend today, the way I am, all traumatized and scared of the most basic romantic interactions, I’d most likely fail to meet all the new expectations you’d have for me, and breaking up with you would certainly demolish all the friendship we’ve built yet, or at least most of it. After all, this is indeed a nature that has unfortunately been taken away from me.” You only felt him squeeze your locks tighter and tighter, trying to press your body against his harder, and slight gasp escaping his throat, hinting his incoming tears. “No, no… Don’t you dare cry on me, Kakavasha…” You lifted your face upwards to smooch him in his collarbone and neck, your hands creeping down to hug him, but that only seemed to make it worse for him.

“D-Do you… at least… love me back..?” His broken voice whispered in your ear again.

“… I’ll always be here with you, Kakavasha.” You decided to not give him a direct answer, wanting to avoid raising the stakes between you two that were already skyrocketing at this point. “Let’s rest now, ok? You’ve done a lot of today. We’ve done a lot today.” You whispered with a soft voiced trying to seduce him again.

It was either shattering his heart or making him set high expectations for his future with you that you didn’t believe you would achieve. And even he recognized it deep down in his heart, even if he wanted to disagree with it. That’s why you immediately changed topics. If you got him to close his eyes and sleep, there could be a chance he’d wake up feeling fine without this part of the night replaying in his mind.

And finally, he started to sob in sorrow for his failed attempt at making you his. He didn’t even know why he was crying at this point. Your words about staying with him forever was so vague and uncertain that it was enough to make him woe, but enough to make him want to hug and savor you for the whole night with all his strength and love, as if he was about to lose you.

And crying makes everyone tired, doesn’t it? So in a few minutes, after sobbing so much after using so much of his energy to have sex with you, his eyes finally weighed too heavy to keep them open, and he sealed them shut, not trying at all to keep them open for more time.

Despite the fact that your relationship with him was still troubled, even if you two tried fixing a bit of it tonight, you two still had to play his part in the cycle of life, and wake up new and fresh tomorrow, whether if it’s to go back to work at the IPC or keep trying to convince Kakavasha that suicide wasn’t worth it for someone like him.

Taglist: @gaboplaydespacito @b1eh-h

Don’t forget to like and comment if you liked it! <3

[oraclemoontarot]

what is your higher-self like 𓂃⊹ pac tarot reading

from left to right, top to bottom -> pile 1, pile 2, pile 3, pile 4

paid readings

•┈┈┈••✦ ♡ ✦••┈┈┈•

pile 1 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

cards pulled: six of pentacles, justice, nine of wands, eight of pentacles, knight of pentacles, six of swords, tower, king of swords, nine of pentacles

Your higher self is someone generous, both with their time and resources. You wouldn't hesitate to help those in need, whether they are inside or outside of your circle. You have a strong understanding of right and wrong, of justice. If you feel as though something is unjust, or a person isn't being treated correctly, you would not hesitate to step in and would do what you can to make things better.

Your higher self is someone who can get through any hardship or bump in your path, you are resilient, strong, and incredibly hardworking. If you want something, you would not hesitate to work for it, to achieve any dream or goal of yours. You are someone who doesn't just stay in the planning phase of a goal, you strive towards it without fear of change, without staying at a standstill.

You as a person are a great communicator too. You are strong, witty, clever and great at expressing your thoughts and feelings with clarity. There is no beating around the bush or holding back how you truly feel. There is an honesty about you that may be intimidating, but the words you share are always from a place of both good intentions and the truth itself.

Overall, the energy of your higher self is that of enjoying the fruits of your labour. You are someone who is humble - appreciating the things around you, as well as the work you put into getting where you are at now. You are strong, independent, hard-working, goal-oriented, and a great communicator who strives for justice and generosity.

pile 2 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

cards pulled: empress, ace of cups, eight of wands, two of wands, knight of cups, ten of cups, nine of wands, king of swords, six of cups

Your higher self can be described by the empress. You are someone nurturing, kind, and who embraces femininity regardless of gender. There is this calm and maturity to you, yet you are still strong with the ability to set clear boundaries. Just as your heart welcomes those around you, it also has a sense of respect for yourself. You are emotionally mature, and feel things on a deep level, sometimes in a way that your emotions overflow, which may be overwhelming at times due to that sensitivity, but it is a beautiful thing, and it is one that shows your level of empathy.

You are a person who is fast moving in the face of your future and goals. You are determined and fiery in that aspect of your life, unmoving from the path you laid out for yourself. Yet, you are just as romantic and idyllic, almost like that of a hopeless romantic, there may be times where you live in your head a lot (you could be an enfp, infp, infj or enfj). I'm not sure why, but there is a chance you may have a childlike nature to you somehow, maybe in the way you express yourself, see the world, or in the way in which you love.

Your higher self is also family-oriented, appreciating the close relationships, and could thrive in such an environment where you would truly feel content and experience a true feeling of abundance. You also come across as a protector for those in which you love, where you would go through a fiery forest to protect them, and that any challenge that presents itself to you would be overcome by that resilience.

Just like pile 1, you are a great communicator with the ability to clearly express both your thoughts and your feelings, to defend others and to stand up for yourself. You are just as intelligent, funny, and strong.

Overall, you are someone who has a sense of familiarity to you, you treasure friendships and really any relationship. You help those around you through either offering to listen to them, supporting them, and providing for them.

pile 3 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

cards pulled: five of cups, two of swords, seven of wands, star, ten of pentacles, three of wands, three of pentacles, queen of cups, high priestess

while I was doing this reading, I felt a bit of pain? Melancholy? But also a sweet and calming energy. It feels like you may have had certain difficulties or challenges in life? it may have been hard on you or painful. But your higher self is someone who chooses to overcome adversities, whether they lay root in your present reality, or in the outer reaches of your heart and mind. You have an inner optimism, a hopeful and positive outlook, and that alone would be enough to ignite a fire in you and drive you towards success, whatever that success might look like to you.

You are hardworking and strong, and I know that certain challenges in life may take the light away from us or make us retreat into a shell, but it did make you stronger, it did make you wiser, and it did make you understand what life truly is about. Your higher self would not indulge for too long in the negative aspects of such experiences, especially if they happened in the past - whether yesterday or a couple years ago - instead, they would look at the other cups that did not spill and realise that, maybe everything really is fine. It's all fine now.

You may pursue a career in teaching or psychology, but if not, you are someone who is wise, who can teach others through your experiences, knowledge and views on the world. You are a high achiever, constantly growing and learning, never satisfied with staying on the same step for too long. You know how to work well with others, how to get people to agree, and how to truly unite them.

As the queen of cups, you have a heart of gold, you are mature, especially emotionally, you are also warm and a true sweetheart. You may have a skill for offering advice and being someone others feel comfortable around (maybe that's why teacher and psychologist came through?). And, with the high priestess, you are deeply intuitive, with an air of mystery to you, there is something so deep and you may live in your head a lot too - a thoughtful person. You understand yourself, others, and the mystical. You may have a skill for tarot as well.

pile 4 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

cards pulled: six of pentacles, two of cups, knight of cups, five of swords, temperance, hierophant, three of swords, judgment, queen of cups

Your higher self is one who is generous and loving. You have so much love, appreciation, and your heart to give to others, you thrive from meaningful connections and helping/supporting people. You understand boundaries yet also steer clear of unnecessary conflict, putting your energy into more meaningful pursuits.

There is this balance and tradition to you. You seek harmony in relationships, balance in give and take, and you have this understanding of pain, loss and heartbreak, giving you true empathy and understanding in others and their emotions, paired with strong moral values.

You are someone capable of achieving great things, growing constantly, self-aware and knowing what your destiny is - what you're truly meant for. You don't let experiences hold you back from achieving greatness. From becoming the best version of yourself. It is like you are able to look at yourself inwardly and see through a critical eye what you need to work on, expand on, and keep.

Overall, your higher self can be explained by the queen of cups. You are nurturing, warm, compassionate, and a great listener and advice giver. You are someone others can feel comfortable around, to speak to without fear of judgment. There is such a strong, beautiful level of empathy within you. You understand yourself and others really really well, almost as though you are reading a book.

[trans-axolotl]

"Much ink has already been spilled on Harris’s prosecutorial background. What is significant about the topic of sex work is how recently the vice president–elect’s actions contradicted her alleged views. During her tenure as AG, she led a campaign to shut down Backpage, a classified advertising website frequently used by sex workers, calling it “the world’s top online brothel” in 2016 and claiming that the site made “millions of dollars from trafficking.” While Backpage did make millions off of sex work ads, its “adult services” listings offered a safer and more transparent platform for sex workers and their clients to conduct consensual transactions than had historically been available. Harris’s grandiose mischaracterization led to a Senate investigation, and the shuttering of the site by the FBI in 2018.

“Backpage being gone has devastated our community,” said Andrews. The platform allowed sex workers to work more safely: They were able to vet clients and promote their services online. “It’s very heartbreaking to see the fallout,” said dominatrix Yevgeniya Ivanyutenko. “A lot of people lost their ability to safely make a living. A lot of people were forced to go on the street or do other things that they wouldn’t have otherwise considered.” M.F. Akynos, the founder and executive director of the Black Sex Worker Collective, thinks Harris should “apologize to the community. She needs to admit that she really fucked up with Backpage, and really ruined a lot of people’s lives.”

After Harris became a senator, she cosponsored the now-infamous Stop Enabling Sex Traffickers Act (SESTA), which—along with the House’s Allow States and Victims to Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act (FOSTA)—was signed into law by President Trump in 2018. FOSTA-SESTA created a loophole in Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act, the so-called “safe harbor” provision that allows websites to be free from liability for user-generated content (e.g., Amazon reviews, Craigslist ads). The Electronic Frontier Foundation argues that Section 230 is the backbone of the Internet, calling it “the most important law protecting internet free speech.” Now, website publishers are liable if third parties post sex-work ads on their platforms.

That spelled the end of any number of platforms—mostly famously Craigslist’s “personal encounters” section—that sex workers used to vet prospective clients, leaving an already vulnerable workforce even more exposed. (The Woodhull Freedom Foundation has filed a lawsuit challenging FOSTA on First Amendment grounds; in January 2020, it won an appeal in D.C.’s district court).

“I sent a bunch of stats [to Harris and Senator Diane Feinstein] about decriminalization and how much SESTA-FOSTA would hurt American sex workers and open them up to violence,” said Cara (a pseudonym), who was working as a sex worker in the San Francisco and a member of SWOP when the bill passed. Both senators ignored her.

The bill both demonstrably harmed sex workers and failed to drop sex trafficking. “Within one month of FOSTA’s enactment, 13 sex workers were reported missing, and two were dead from suicide,” wrote Lura Chamberlain in her Fordham Law Review article “FOSTA: A Hostile Law with a Human Cost.” “Sex workers operating independently faced a tremendous and immediate uptick in unwanted solicitation from individuals offering or demanding to traffic them. Numerous others were raped, assaulted, and rendered homeless or unable to feed their children.” A 2020 survey of the effects of FOSTA-SESTA found that “99% of online respondents reported that this law does not make them feel safer” and 80.61 percent “say they are now facing difficulties advertising their services.” "

-What Sex Workers Want Kamala Harris to Know by Hallie Liberman

[redgoldsparks]

It's Right to Read Day, celebrating libraries, highlighting the relentless attacks against them, and encouraging folks to take at least one action to defend them! The American Library Association's data on the most banned books from 2024 is now out; after 3 years in the top spot GENDER QUEER came in at second on the list with George M Johnson's beautiful queer memoir ALL BOYS AREN'T BLUE at number one. If you haven't read it yet, please go pick up this book.

Unfortunately, instead of dying down, we are now seeing the book ban movement morph into an effort to defund and destroy ALL public libraries and ALL public education, as exemplified by the Trump Administration aiming to dismantle the Department of Education and placing all employees of the Institute of Museum and Library Services on administrative leave. The IMLS is an independent federal agency that provides grants to libraries and museums across the country. According to the American Library Association, the IMLS provides “the majority of federal library funds.” The IMLS says it awarded $266 million in grants and research funding to cultural institutions last year. This money goes to help staff, fund maintenance, and create new programs. If you are curious how the termination of this grant funding will effect the state of California, here is a press release from the California State Library. Please call your state governor and representatives asking them to demand support for the IMLS!

I also wanted to share some resources to help you talk about book bans/book challenges if the topic comes up in conversation. There are a set of really common bad faith arguments which book banners make, and I helped write up a set of responses for Authors Against Book Bans (much of this was also written and compiled by superstar author and AABB leader Maggie Tokuda-Hall). Below the responses to bad faith arguments are a list of resources you can contribute to, especially if you live in a blue state and don't have a current legislative battle over books and libraries in your own backyard.

What to Say When They Say What They Always Say: an Authors Against Book Bans resource

I haven’t read this book but I don’t think it’s appropriate for children! 

Please read the full book before you judge it. Passages are often presented without context. 

So you want kids to have access to porn?

No. And if that is a concern of yours as a parent, install browser filters such as Google SafeSearch on your children’s devices to keep them from accessing the wealth of pornography available to them on the internet. It’s already illegal to bring pornography into schools. There are robust safeguards– from laws, to industry standards in publishing and librarianship and education– to safeguard our children from obscene materials, as determined by the Miller Test. 

What about parents’ rights?

Parents already have robust rights in their children’s education. When that means limiting access to certain books parents can do so; nearly all schools have policies to this effect. But what about all the parents who WANT their kids to have access to books? Their children should not be limited by what another parent in the community decides for their own family. And what if a parent wants to limit their child’s access to something that child would benefit from? What about the child’s rights? Children are people, not possessions of their parents.

If my taxes fund the schools and libraries, I should have a say in how they’re used.

Schools and libraries serve entire communities, not just those who agree with you. Libraries and schools have professional educators and librarians with PhDs who are trained to curate collections that serve diverse populations, not just one viewpoint.

LGBTQ+ books confuse kids or make them gay/trans. They push an agenda.

LGBTQ+ representation is not an “agenda”—it’s simply a reflection of real people’s lives. If books featuring LGBTQ+ characters are “pushing an agenda,” then books featuring straight relationships or cisgender characters are as well. Reading about something does not automatically change a person’s identity, just as reading about astronauts does not turn every child into an astronaut. Reading about LGBTQ+ characters can both help kids understand themselves and build empathy and understanding towards others.

I live California. Why should I care about book bans if they’re not happening here?

We are fortunate to live in a state where book banning on the basis of discrimination has been outlawed through AB1825, which passed in 2024. However, California has still seen numerous book challenges in cities like Huntington Beach, Burbank, Lodi, and Chico—some of which continue efforts to overturn these protections. While bans are worse in red states, they still happen in blue states. Book bans are about control—not protecting children. The people banning books today will censor other forms of speech tomorrow. The right to read is a fundamental civil liberty, and we should protect it accordingly.

How Can I Help from a Blue State? For the biggest bang for your buck, we recommend  that you donate to the grassroots organizations making a difference in the places where the bans are happening all the time. All the ACLU chapters listed here are currently involved in lawsuits against book banners. 

We suggest:

Florida Freedom to Read Project: https://www.fftrp.org/donate 

Texas Freedom to Read Project: https://www.txftrp.org/donate 

Honesty for Ohio Education: https://www.honestyforohioeducation.org/donate.html 

Diversity Awareness Youth Literacy Organization (DAYLO) in South Carolina: https://patconroyliterarycenter.org/donate-today-to-pat-conroy-literary-center/ 

Students Engaged in Advancing Texas (SEAT): https://www.studentsengaged.org/donate 

San Francisco’s Books Not Bans!: https://givebutter.com/booksnotbans 

Coeur D’Alene Public Library in Idaho: https://cdalibrary.org/donate/ 

Let Utah Read: https://www.fundlibraries.org/letutahread

Tennessee ACLU: https://www.aclu-tn.org/en/donate 

South Carolina ACLU: https://action.aclu.org/give/support-aclu-south-carolina 

Southern California ACLU: https://action.aclu.org/give/support-aclu-socal 

Iowa ACLU: https://action.aclu.org/give/support-aclu-iowa 

Fight for the First helps start grassroots groups all across the country: https://secure.actblue.com/donate/fightforthefirst 

EveryLibrary (is a national org, but they financially support many of the groups listed here, as well as AABB): https://www.everylibrary.org/donate 

You can also call your state reps to express your commitment to protecting the freedom to read. Protections in blue states are just as contagious as bans in red states. The more of us who have them, the more states will follow suit. Use the 5Calls app do this, or find your rep here: https://findyourrep.legislature.ca.gov/ 

And of course- if you are an author, editor, illustrator, cartoonist, translator, anthology editor, self-published author, please join Authors Against Book Bans! We could use the help! If you want to help recruit to AABB, feel free to print and pass out my recruitment zine at any literary event you attend <3

[endearing-dalliance]

the way the Arcane team romanticize the undercity disgusts me

Especially in the new art book, they talk about how Zaun and Piltover really aren’t as different as they first seem, as they are both heavily invested in technology. Zaun is a bastion of flamboyant body modification and innovative technology. They describe it as a refuge for outcasts who are looking for a home, where people are free from Piltover’s rigid rules and politics. A communal place with a thrilling sense that anything is possible. The Firelights are described as a group uses the freedom granted by Piltover not caring about them to find beauty and innovation. People are particularly interested in recycling technology and resources because "nothing is precious and everything can always be made better". Bc obviously that's why poor people fix stuff. They are definitely able to easily replace stuff at any time, but they want to strive for perfection...

In the same breath, they describe Zaun as being oppressed, crushed by Piltover, addicted to Shimmer, having “some issues with the mob”, dangerous, volatile. They talk about how if it was better, people like Jinx and Ekko could use their skills for good. This is the same place that’s a refuge for innovative, flamboyantly augmented outcasts to be able to make wonderful technology?

Notable mention: "we had to design a prison, and that was tricky because Piltover is supposed to be a city of progress - do they really put people in prisons? Maybe only people from the Undercity, and maybe they put them really far away" like seriously does nobody realize how fucked up that is? Your issue with it is the difficulty in designing the prison?

Like have any of these people ever actually met someone who lives in an irl place like Zaun? Heard of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs? Opened any book or video on heavily polluted urban areas?

On top of that, the undercity is filled with negative stereotypes. Many of the characters are “bad” in some way, whether that be missing body parts, mentally damaged, filthy, an addict. Their food is tentacles, a drooling animal head, and a dish that looks very much like slugs in mud sauce (vs Piltover’s “normal” sandwich). Many of the people are all dressed punk/goth/sexy and look “dangerous”. This season, I expected them to address those stereotypes and show how Zaun has equal value to Piltover. That those differences don’t make people hateable or disgusting or deserving of their misery. Instead, we got “actions have consequences” theme and a dying man who suffered from chronic pain and mobility issues his entire life being told that his imperfections make him beautiful. (She-Ra did that line already and did it much better.) Because using tech/magic to fix his leg and spine strip him of his humanity.

The team have said they were specifically inspired by the current political climate in the US, specifically the two-party system within one nation divided and unable to reason with each other. But that is an entirely different and incompatible concept. Zaun literally doesn’t get a vote, and that kind of lack of political representation is literally why America rebelled against England. Its not as simple as them just talking it out or getting a single vote. And for me it explains why the conflict fizzled out in season 2 and felt so unresolved. I was expecting independence, which is the only solution to colonial oppression, but the creators gave us a fix for the political party problem they thought they were showing. We only got to see the Piltie’s viewpoint of Zaun, and it was unflattering specifically in the ways that are in real life associated classism, body shaming, and cultural shaming. They were never redeemed or validated, and almost everyone repeatedly proved the Pilties were right about them all along. In season 2, all the bad guys were Zaunites (Jinx, Viktor, Skye, Vanwick, Singed kind of) aided by a foreign power also trying to use them, and the solution was for them not to be part of their world anymore. They were too broken, too evil, too violent to remain. And for the rest, their only use was to die protecting the Pilties from one of their own people (whose autonomy wasn't even respected by his own partner and became his own worst nightmare). Instead of it being this glorious, Marvelesque fight where everyone bands together against one common enemy, it’s just another situation in which they are brutally exploited.

And I would genuinely be OK with all of this as some sort of tragic story that ended terribly for everyone and there was no real solution or progress, just more bloodshed. A tale of caution.

But the creators have been very clear that they feel that this is an appropriate ending to the story and the individual characters’ stories. Specifically, they are pushing this idea that the finale was to show the characters facing the consequences of their actions. But the characters themselves aren’t the problem, it’s the society that they are living in that basically corrupted everything it touched. Mel and the council manipulated and pressured Jayce and Viktor into making weapons instead of technology that was designed to help people, while also ignoring Viktor’s steadily worsening health problems that *they caused*. Vi and Jinx were repeatedly traumatized, orphaned, and weaponized. Cait literally got away with being a dictator, but even she was manipulated by someone who was only ever able to establish power by taking advantage of the situation. Singed (OG Piltie) literally committed war crimes and got everything he wanted. And according to the creators, everyone got what they deserved. Piltover received no punishment or retribution for their oppression. The undercity got no apology or redemption/validation. Piltover got no significant consequences. They’re still in power, still rich, still have Hextech, still oppressing the undercity. And I guess that's what they deserve.

What a load of absolute horseshit. I had a lot of expectations for season 2, but "the arcane team are actually Pilties in the worst way possible" was absolutely not one of them. I'm genuinely devastated.

[roseglazedlens]

⦑ THE FUCKING DEAD ⦒ 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞

➠ series masterlist | ��girl’s route | 🔃boy’s route |

𝐒𝐌𝐔𝐓┇𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑┇𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐅𝐈𝐂┇𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐒𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐀𝐃𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄 LEON S. KENNEDY & CARLOS OLIVEIRA X AFAB GN! READER ADA WONG & JILL VALENTINE X AFAB GN! READER chapter synopsis: You are amongst the top five selected for this infiltration to take down Glenn Arias. An argument unfolds between the agents and you are forced to pick a side. chapter content: smut in next chapter, resident evil: vendetta spoilers, zombies, haunted mansion, explicit themes throughout this series. a/n: welcome to my second series!! (need to finish my first one oops) on a thursday one month ago, i thought to myself 'zombie threesome hehehe', then i took the idea and sprinted with it and this series is born. so, uh... zombiefuckers rise up?? « 3.3 k words | general masterlist | ao3 | reblogs appreciated! »

Millions are dying—Mass infections are happening across the globe swamping the streets with an unbeknownst fear. The symptoms of this virus are faint, indecipherable next to an x-ray of a man who is perfectly healthy. Not even the carrier themselves are aware of how the virus lies underneath their veins, dormant, until a click of button is pressed from a commander far away, then their symptoms worsen: a headache, a cold, veins turning purple as the poison hatches in them, spreading, until the only thing that can manoeuvre their limbs is the word: KILL.

That’s the greatest strength of this virus. Anyone can be infected, and maybe, you already are.

This product first reached the underground market three months ago. Called the A-Virus; a bioweapon succeeded in the market for its ability to infect targeted communities remotely and leaving no evidence on the perpetrator, which no other distributors had successfully produced before.

Engineered by Glenn Arias, the researcher sold over thousands of this bioweapon, becoming a billionaire overnight at the cost of lives lost from the whims of the rich. He supplied the wealthy and corrupted, like insatiable brats, with new remote-controlled monster trucks, who only aims to tear down families and have their victims beg mercy to a monster that will not speak reason.

Hence, this problem brought attention to a global scale, having the DSO come in alliance with the BSAA and other independent mercenaries to hunt down the vaccine and put a stop to Arias’ grand schemes. Handpicking five agents who are equipped with both experience and skill to combat a zombie attack on this scale of doom and urgency.

Those five agents are Jill Valentine, Carlos Oliveira, Leon S. Kennedy, Ada Wong, and you.

A plan is already in place. A distraction concocted with your intel and the help of a senior researcher of all things bioweapons, Rebecca Chambers. While Arias is busy attending fake business meetings on the other side of the world, the five of you will infiltrate his private mansion to retrieve a concentrated sample of the A-Virus. Rebecca can use the sample to reverse engineer it into a cure and send her findings to facilities across the world.

The plan sounds brilliant in writing, but when you arrived his private mansion in Queretaro region, Mexico, something is off about this place.

Arias is a mastermind, you had been warned many times, in which you appropriately prepared all your best gear for this mission to treat it with utmost gravity. You’re thinking armed guards, well-equipped security, BOWs. But when the five of you pushed open the front doors of his mansion, it was quiet.

Empty. Not a single soul. Just five of you greeted by the whisk of wind through weakly hinged windows that somehow makes the humid air stick to your skin further. Did Rebecca get the wrong info? No one lived there. From what you heard when you were in town, not even the locals dare to venture anywhere near the odd gothic mansion on the top of the hill. They said it’s abandoned, cursed, rumoured to whisk away young children if they ever step foot inside.

It’s a story they say to stop the naughty kids, you remind yourself. It’s not haunted. And you’re not a kid anymore.

The inside is abandoned. Cobwebs lay thick between cornices and carved columns, the floors laced with a film of dust on the luxurious dark wood flooring, creaking with worn age as you take each step. Besides the chandelier, every single piece of furniture is either the same colour of black or red, or nothing else. The soft red velvet upholstery and the rug are made with the same fabric. And you can find the same dark wood in every corner of this house. It’s in the tables, the shelves, the chaise, the painting frames, and stone-like head sculpture whittled with the same exact dark wood, ridged the exact uniform way.

Then, you look at the wall. Black patches of mould smearing across the burgundy wallpaper like a crime scene.

Something creaks behind you. The hair on your arms stands up as you shiver, immediately followed by a wave of embarrassment. Despite the number of times you had taken down hordes of incoming zombies like they’re cardboard targets, why is a bit of wind freaking you out? It’s not a ghost, just old foundations, maybe mice, or wind kicking something off a table, like how every old house sounds like. You look around to see if anyone else catches you jumping at nothing, before Jill says, thankfully unaware of your worry:

“God, the smell. What have they done to this place?” Her hand flies over her nose as if that will help to shield any smell whatsoever. Unfortunately, the building is moulded far beyond salvageable that the stench lingers in every part of the mansion.

“I’m sure it’s not that bad. We get weeks-old corpses in body bags every day. It’s absolutely retching.” Jill’s earpiece fizzes into life, and she recognises the familiar playful lilt of Rebecca’s voice on the other side of the line.

“At least that’s refrigerated and contained, Rebecca. This fucking stinks.” Jill scrunches her face like she just ate something unpleasant.

“I’m sending my sympathies from my well-conditioned lab right now.”

Carlos appears from Jill’s behind, placing a firm, teasing hand on top of Jill’s shoulder. His wavy curls catch in the wind and his teeth glistens sparkly white. “Yeah Jill, got a problem with my natural musk?”

Jill shrugs his hand off, grimacing at his attempts at flirtation. “Take a shower first, then we’ll talk.”

In which Carlos laughs, holds his hand out at his heart as if it was just torn into shreds. “That hurts my feelings, Jill. Why aren’t you ever saying things like that to pretty boy over there?”

“I have a name, Oliveira.” The blond man turns around at the call of his nickname, familiar with the nickname, but it's not pleasantly received by him.

“I think pretty boy suits you more, Kennedy.” Carlos replies, a glint in his voice that hints something a bit less than friendliness between them.

“Ah, so you do know my name.” Leon quips back while staring directly into Carlos’ eyes, before getting cut off by Jill.

“I would, Carlos, but if I have to hear one more corny ass comeback from Leon’s mouth, I’ll throw myself out the window right now.”

“Takes a genius to get my humour.” Leon smirks.

Your eyebrows raise almost immediately to chime in. “Erm… I think we have different meanings for the word ‘genius’.”

Quiet chuckles ripple through the room. It helps that you have worked with these guys throughout the years and had come to know and get close to them—some a bit closer than just friends—but none of them are strangers by far. Usually, you would be working with only one or two of these guys, never in a big group like this, but it seems that everyone is already well-acquainted with each other.

You toss a glance at Carlos and catch him staring at you, smiling. Ah, you see now. Carlos must have been trying to lighten the mood because you had been jumpy ever since you had arrived. You nod at him, a silent thank you before the five of you venture deeper into the eerie atmosphere.

The goal is to arrive at Glenn Aria’s office. According to Rebecca’s intel, Arias hid a concentrated sample in a safe last time he was here. You will need Ada to crack the safe to retrieve the sample and deliver it to Rebecca. As you traverse the corridors, it twists and turns in different directions—whoever engineered this did not enjoy unexpected guests at all. But under Rebecca’s guidance, she walks you and your team through the labyrinth with ease and precision.

But unfortunately, not ease and precision on your part. You trip over your own leg and almost fall to the floor as you round a harsh turn according to Rebecca’s instructions, and Jill catches you right on the arm before you fall.

“Easy there.” Jill pulls you up the ground, and you regain some balance. “You good? Mind your step.”

“Why did I agree to babysit?” Ada speaks, finally, for the first time in this mission. Despite how quietly she spoke under her breath, her words abruptly cut through the air, and all attention is on her and the red sweater dress that curves into her frame perfectly now.

“Oh, I bet once you get your paycheck it will be worth it. Or will you be betraying us, huh, Ada?”

Leon smirks loudly. Ada’s face goes from tired to exhausted in one second. “You just can’t let bygones be bygones, can you?”

“That’s rich coming from someone who used to work for Wesker.” Ada’s heels come to a stop, and with a slow turn, she stares deeply into Leon’s eyes that speak a million threats without needing to be utter a word. Oh, and believe me, you do not want to be messing with Ada. You learnt that the hard way.

“Woah, guys. Let’s keep this civil. No need to get heated.” Carlos rushes to stand right between them as the duo glares at each other with passionate fury and resentment.

You nod, joining Carlos’ side to stand by him. “Carlos’s right. This is not the time to pick a fight.” But it falls on the deaf ears of Leon and Ada.

“Thousands were killed. I want what’s good for the people, and I’m not sure Ada here is on the same page.” Leon continues, adding fuel to the fire.

Ada lets out a disbelieved gasp in response, before recollecting herself and replying in her usual tone of calmness: “Someone has to pay the price. I’m just the executor.”

“Regardless of our motivations, we all are on the same side here.” Carlos attempts at resolution again, putting his hands up in between them, and fails embarrassingly once more.

The air is heated with hostility; Leon and Ada’s eyes are locked in a trance, a hazy spite that reigns their composure, that looking away from each other means forfeiting. You don’t see either of them walking away first, they are both prideful people after all.

“Uh… Jill? Some help?” Carlos looks around to find Jill, who is leaning against a wall, her arms relaxing by her sides, unphased by the fire stirring right in front of the crowd.

“Not my circus, not my monkeys.” Jill is merely waiting for either one of the parties roll over.

You feel speckles of flame through the two of them, as if steam is retreating over the top of their heads, burning not just them, but also everyone else in the room. Until the boiling point hits, and it erupts all in one second. The duo walks away, off to different directions in bitter adrenaline, until you and Carlos are just looking at each other.

“I guess we’ll take five. There’s a safe room up ahead.” Carlos is speaking, but you’re the one listening.

The five of you enters the safe room in silence. It is a storage room—despite its name, it’s quite large for a normal storage room—with boxes stacked on all ends that made the room seem smaller in comparison. A ceiling light illuminates the room dimly, but it isn’t enough to shade away years of old animosity from their past.

The lively conversations you had mere minutes ago is gone now. Just silence and awkward rustling as each of you sits in your own designated corner. Carlos and Jill find themselves a seat on top of a firm box. Leon and Ada giving each other the silent treatment, standing on farthest end of the room to each other. You are simply minding your own business, gathering materials to craft a flashbang to pass the time. Doesn’t hurt to have more supplies anyway.

There is a notable division on each side, an imaginary alliance that you choose to be on neither side. Until Leon crosses the boundary line, somehow making his way to you. He picks up an empty grenade case next to you, assembling the pieces together for your project.

“Sorry you had to see that.” A little guilt tugs at Leon’s voice.

“Not at all. I get why you felt that way.” Leon nods, a look of gratitude hanging softly through a smile. His other finger seals the flashbang cap and hands it back to you. “But you need to learn to control your temper. Especially when it comes to Ada.”

Speaking of Ada, a shiver runs down your spine suddenly. The feeling of someone sending laser signs and telepathic warnings towards you. You turn around towards the direction of the aura to find Ada, her back leaning against the wall, arms crossed without engaging or acknowledging anyone in the room. She stands by herself alone, and that’s how you had always known Ada—distant and in her own mysterious world. Not really a chatter, despite the number of times she had saved you in the past.

Ada does not look at you, but you can feel her glaring down—either you or Leon—with her entire body.

“Good to see the two of you getting along at least.” Carlos holds out two plastic water bottles to you two from a supply crate he found in the room, which Jill has finished downing two of them already.

You two gesture ‘no thanks.’ Ada does not spare Carlos a glance at his direction when he offers.

“You’re welcome, I guess.” Carlos says sarcastically, before taking in a generous sip from his drink.

There’s a moment of silence. Then, a moment of dry coughs; a squeak of footsteps, a joint click from a stretching neck. Then silence once more.

“I’ve had enough.” Jill slaps her hands on her thigh before pushing herself up from her seat. “You guys gonna keep acting like kids? Grow up, this isn’t high school anymore. Take your drama outside. If we’re gonna take down Arias, we have to get along. And yes, that means moving on from shit that happened… five years ago? Five years ago and you two are still hung up? Unlike you all, I’m actually looking forward to go home and get a decent shower, hopefully soon.”

You nod in approval as Jill speaks her mind, and you are glad at least the few of you have their priorities in order. Ada flicks her head away from Jill, but her silence is telling of how much she is thinking over Jill’s words.

“Leon, can you accept this?” Jill asks.

There’s a bit of reluctance in his voice, but he agrees anyway. “Fine.”

“Ada?”

Before Ada can respond, smoke is creeping into your vision, coming in quick. It merges into your view, obscuring it, and you whiff something artificial, some kind of chemicals that is piercing to your nose and eyes. You can’t help but wince, hands groping the air in attempts to find comfort in the person closest to you—anyone for that matter—to indicate you’re safe and is indeed not under attack. Your fingers find themselves in a fistful of someone’s shirt, muscles tensing tightly underneath the fabric on their shoulder cap.

“Leon. Is that you?” You cry out.

“It’s me. Stay close and don’t let go. It’s an ambush.” Leon pulls your arm towards him, securing your safety with his hand in yours.

There is some coughing through the air, faint panic in voices underneath the hissing of gas that seems to be coming from above. You hold onto Leon a bit tighter.

Carlos calls out desperately “Where are you guys? Is everyone okay?” as he flaps his hand around the smoke to stir it away. He finds you and Leon almost immediately, and looks down to your hands, finding them clasped tight against each other. Your hand lets go of Leon flying behind your back, but Carlos already saw it.

Jill is coughing deep from the smoke. “I-I’m here!”

“It seems like we’re all here.” Ada says, composed as ever despite the circumstances.

The smoke dissipates—until most of the fog fades away, escaping through the cracks underneath the door to the other side. Leaving the five of you standing in the same storage room darting eyes around, seemingly unharmed, and even more confused.

After what feels like a while later, Jill finally breaks the silence: “Huh. What was that?”

“No enemies.” Ada unholsters the pistol from her belt, inspecting the room and the door behind the room. “Clear on this side too.”

It’s strange. If this is an ambush, why isn’t there an attack?

Leon places a finger on his earpiece to activate his microphone. “Rebecca, come in. We’ve just been ambushed by some kind of smoke, but nobody’s hurt. Happen to know what’s going on?”

His earpiece buzzes into life. “Hmm, let’s see. From the architecture plans, I see the vents are connected to a lab below. It seems abandoned, there are no signs of anyone triggering an attack on my end.”

“Whatever it is, we need to investigate.” Leon’s voice is firm and serious. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

You swallow deeply, fear settling back inside you. “You think it’s a trap?”

“I think…” Leon pinches his chin. “…Arias knows that we’re here.”

Your heart drops—Bundle of fear, anxiety and stress springing back into your nerves as you probe at the possibility of Glen Arias knowing where you are. What you’re trying to do. Making sure you will never reach that sample despite your hardest wills.

“He shouldn’t. Rebecca, didn’t Arias get on the jet?” Carlos is also thinking too.

“Affirmative. Security footage showed Arias walking into his private jet, and it took off four hours ago. He should still be in the air. No signal of them making a pitstop anywhere.”

You hear black pumps clacking against the hardwood floor. “I’m getting the sample.” Says Ada, her foot is already halfway out of the door. “Follow me or not, I don’t care. I’m here for the objective, and only that.”

“And what if something happens to you?” Carlos asks, genuinely concerned.

“I’ll deal with it if it happens.” Ada waves dismissively.

“Ada’s right, we could be set on a wild goose chase.” Jill chimes in. “Millions of lives are dying. We don’t have time to waste.”

“I guess it’s just you and me then, pretty boy.” Carlos rounds his arm around Leon’s neck, bringing him closer in an almost choking grip, a little too close and tight to his liking. And with Leon’s history with Carlos, Leon refuses to believe this is just a friendly gesture.

Leon grimaces, removing Carlos’ hand over him. “So that’s it? We’re splitting up?” The answer is unanimous. “Fine. I guess we’ll cover more ground if we split up.”

Rebecca, through the other side of your earpiece, speaks: “Be careful everyone. You don’t know what kind of schemes Glenn Arias had set up. Please stay safe.”

“We’ll be fine, as long as we don't have any traitors in our team.” Leon says the word ‘traitor’ while maintaining eye contact with Ada. She ignores him, simply deadpans.

“Well, what about you?” Leon nudges at your arm.

You are faced with two options. Indulge in your curiosity and find the source of the gas, or stick to mission as planned? Both options will be dangerous. So who will you trust with your life?

[OPTION A] “I’ll follow the girls.”

[OPTION B] “I’ll follow the boys.”

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 thanks for reading! come check out my other works! —yours truly, rose. i love my beta reader @scar-crossedlvrs! series taglist: @j3llyd0nut @ovaryacted @daydreamrot @madcap-riflette @access--granted @obsolescent @briermelli @secretiveauthor @ghosty-frog @navstuffs @slowcryinginthedark @rentaldarling @lesbntired © roseglazedlens — please do not repost, plagiarise, or feed to ai.