#Top 1 polycules from hell

[ryoshudoodles]

84° Day of waiting for Canto 9

[sceletaflores]

woo, my baby's got me all mixed up!

feat: logan howlett & wade wilson

contains: 18+ SMUT MDNI, fem!reader, swearing, a bastard doomed polycule, more of 'why have just one bf when you can two bf's and why have just two bf's when you can have two bf's that are also each other’s bf's???', p in v, double penetration, one (1) single use of daddy, creampie(s), fingering...kind of (fem!receiving), oral sex, face sitting, face fucking, straight up nasty porn w/ zero plot, no use of y/n.

nat’s note: this is a shorter one-shot but i can't not format it like a full fic i have to or i'll get hives. this is also just pure freak nasty gross actually probably the filthiest thing i've ever written that i thought up off too much nyquil pm last night. kisses!

wade gets to whiskin’ (and logan's there too)…

"You're killing me babe," Wade groans lowly, cheek pressed to the slick skin of your inner thigh. "If my balls didn't feel like they just got the shit beat out of them in a back alley I'd be as hard as David Hasselhoff watching David Hasselhoff movies."

His hand is at work between your thighs, thick index finger slipped into your sensitive, puffy pussy.

It should gross you out that he loves doing this so much. It should make your stomach twist with all the unpleasant feelings a normal person might get.

It should, but it doesn't.

The familiar stretch is lost from taking Logan and Wade at the same time, a rare thing in your sex life because of how big they both are. But you were in a mood tonight.

Your pussy still clenches around him, trying in vain to tighten up, not used to feeling so empty.

The subtle pressure of Wade’s finger toes the line between pleasure and the sharp burn of 'almost too much' as it swirls along the sensitive walls of your pussy.

The first time he did it you were too fucked out of your mind to do anything other than ask what the hell he was doing.

"Gotta mix it up babe," was his reply, as easy as anything. "Don't want the baby batter to curdle, if you know what I mean."

Your heart stopped, flames lapping their way up your body as Wade scooped the thin line of come trickling from your abused hole to fuck it back in, back where it belonged.

It was so filthy, so depraved that it made you go liquid between your legs.

Your eyes almost immediately slid over to Logan, ready to see him shaking his head in irritation like he usually did whenever Wade ran his mouth in bed. You found nothing, no deep grimace or raised brow in sight.

There was an unmistakable heat in his gaze that matched your own, the inky black of his pupils blown so wide you could hardly see the hazel of his irises.

The casual raise of his right shoulder when he met your eye was undermined by the way his cock started to harden where it laid against his thigh, effectively tattling on him.

It told you all you needed to know about how he really felt watching Wade between your spread legs. That alone was enough to get you ready to go all over again.

It sort of became a thing after that.

"I'm not even doing anything..." you mumble breathlessly, your voice barely above a whisper.

"Don't have to baby," Logan purrs from behind you, lips pressed to the top of your head. His hand skimming down the side of your body is enough to make goosebumps pebble along your skin, "Look perfect just like this."

It's been hours now, but they're still going. You're convinced that the two of them are the world's biggest horndogs, just once is never enough.

You lost track of tonight's rounds sometime after number five, not counting mouth and hand stuff of course. And it's starting to catch up to you, you’re tired, spent.

Wade curls his finger just right, brushing against the spot inside you that has a broken whine passing through your grit teeth. Your thighs start to tremble as a smug grin spreads across his face.

"Yeah, there it is," he teases, his voice low. He keeps the tip of his finger snug against that spot, rubbing firm circles over the sensitive nerves. "That's that spot ain't it, gorgeous."

"Wade," you mewl, hands fisting the sheets as you fight to keep still. You're worried too much squirming will make their come start dripping out around Wade's wrist, and you can't have that.

There’s a sudden silence to your right, the heaviness of it pulling at your attention. You shift slightly, catching the faintest rustle of movement from Logan.

His breath is warm against the crown of your skill, his strong chest still plastered to your back—but he's too quiet, too still. You tilt your head just enough to peek at him out of the corner of your eye, and the sight alone is almost enough to make you come on the spot.

Logan is leaning against the headboard lazily, arm that isn't circled around your waist snaking down his own with the hard length of his cock in his hand.

Your mouth waters at the sight of him, red and leaking pre-come all over his knuckles each time he twists his fist over the thick head. Your hips grind down unconsciously, a needy moan falling from your parted lips. The wet sound of it has your cheeks burning, eyes fixed on the way his heavy balls bounce with each rough tug, still so full.

"Fuck, that's it," Wade murmurs, slipping a second finger inside you while he presses a shit-eating grin to the soft skin of your lower stomach. "You like it when daddy jerks off while I'm knuckle deep in you?"

"Watch it," Logan mutters warningly, tone gone low and dark as spilled ink. His hand doesn't slow, the loose grip of his fist slipping up and down his dripping cock in time with the slick squelch of your pussy.

Your hips buck up against Wade’s hand, a loud whine tearing from your chest at the dirtiness of this whole thing. The familiar heat starts to stir in your belly, your pussy drooling more mess over his wrist the longer he plays with you.

Wade barely muffles his chuckle against your hip, dropping a quick kiss there before pulling his soaked fingers from your velvety warmth. You whine at the loss, but he doesn’t pay it any mind.

You’ll both get what you want soon enough.

"Alright, we should all know the drill by now people," he announces to you and Logan with a loud clap, pulling away from between your thighs to roll flat onto his back.

“Time to hop on the saddle, John Wayne,” he finishes, giving your ass a loving tap.

Logan snorts into your hair, dropping his cock to grab your hips and gently manhandle you until you’re situated directly over Wade’s face while Logan kneels in front of you. The jut of his cock bobbing inches away from your mouth.

Wade’s greedy fingers pry your swollen lips apart to watch the way his and Logan’s come starts to seep out from you, falling to drip onto his bare chest. He blows over the wet length of you, the cool air from his mouth has your hips twitching down in search of any friction you can get.

“Not so fast,” he scolds lightly, grinding his knuckle against the wet seam of you. Your nails dig crescent moons into his scarred shoulders, threatening to break the skin.

“You’ve gotta savor this moment, hot stuff,” he says slowly, leaning up to press a kiss directly over your throbbing clit. “You got the best seat in the house, don’t take it for granted–”

"Enough," Logan grunts, heavy hands falling on your shoulders to push you down on Wade's face, fully closing the gap. "Quit runnin' your damn mouth and make our girl feel good, red."

Wade's hands tighten their hold on your thighs, his hips bucking up off the mattress like he can't help it. His surprised moan rumbles against your clit, loud and shameless.

You cry out at the first drag of his tongue over your aching pussy, hot and wet as it slides through your dripping slit. You pitch forward, too caught up in pleasure to think clearly as you take Logan’s cock into your mouth. You take him all the way down to the root in one swift move, burying your nose in the dark hair surrounding the base. 

"Fuck," Logan bites out, eyes twisting shut as he feels your warm throat enveloping him. He takes your hair in his fist gently, just holding it as you swallow around him. 

Your hands move to rest on his thick thighs, nails scratching over the hair scattered along his skin. His breath shutters in his chest, his hips rolling forward ever so slightly, chasing the tight heat of your mouth.

The mix of your tongue tracing along the sensitive vein on the underside of his cock and the low, wet sounds of Wade devouring you has him pulsing in your mouth.

Your thighs shake on either side of Wade's head, the steady grip of his hands the only thing that keeps you from collapsing into a boneless heap on the mattress.

Your hips twitch the tiniest bit, rocking forward enough to grind your clit over the slope of his nose. He groans under you, squeezing the meat of your thighs in encouragement as he swirls his tongue through the mess dripping from your hole.

“That’s a good girl,” Logan praises gruffly, his hips speeding up. “Shut him up, baby. Make him fuckin’ eat it.”

You squeeze your eyes shut, dragging your pussy along Wade’s mouth faster. You moan desperately around your mouthful, brain going hazy around the edges.

The frantic pace you set only makes their come leak from you faster, dripping down Wade’s face faster than he can keep up, and there's just so much.

A steady, thick stream of it that feels almost never ending thanks to Logan coming like he busted a pipe and absolutely flooding your insides every single time.

Wade doesn’t seem deterred in the slightest though, swirling his tongue along you with a new sense of urgency. His hands grip your hips tighter, his blunt nails digging into your skin deliciously as he slurps and sucks with unbridled enthusiasm, chasing every drop of come.

He’s sloppy with it, come sliding down his cheeks and chin in thin rivers of white.

Logan’s rough breath hitches above you, his fingers tightening in your hair as you take him deeper, hollowing your cheeks just the way he likes. His growl sends a thrill down your spine.

"C'mon, Wilson," Logan grunts, his hips speeding up. When you peer up at him, you can see the goading smile that just barely tugs the corner of his mouth up.

“Spitters are quitters, you know that."

tags are now in the comments! if you want to get tagged for any of my works just fill out this form!

[still-a-morosexual-help]

Okay fine Mechat has some actually interesting concepts & stories.......

1. Succubus LI trying desperately to suck out MC's life via sex Vs. Demisexual MC who just wants to eat burgers, go on walks & sleep well at night

2. DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE!!!??

3. Her:

4. Dead guy trying to scam other dead people out of their money and trying his best to seem scary and morbid Vs. MC who lives next to a cemetery, is morbidly fascinated by death, at most thinks he's funny

5. Genius indie game developer escaping an abusive family + MC willing to throw hands with his mother at any given moment

6. Nonbinary mermaid. That's it. (merperson?)

7. Polycule with 4 eldritch horrors. They're personifications like the Sins but they've got 0 control and you get to see what that actually means

8. Sea demon trying desperately to eat MC Vs. MC enjoying making his life living hell and making him flustered by flirting with him - also they have some of the funniest chats

10. Nonbinary dragon with a gem/jewellery making hyperfixation

11. Modern day beauty and the beast retelling except it's VERY CLEAR that if he ever permanently turned into a human MC would ditch him so fast.

LI: I'm a terrible hideous monster, a freak, no one will ever want me, I literally look like if someone stretched a dog's skin over a human's body, you should leave me and never come back

MC: Take off your shirt

12. Overworked barista MC who is just done and dead inside and just begging the man with a gun who just crashed through the cafe's window to shoot them in the face

13. """The stray cat I brought home turned into a hot naked guy who basically called me useless, kicked me out of my own bed and home, then texted me to cry about how I don't care for him because I went to work without leaving any cat toys out for him to play with but I'm going to coo at him and give him anything his little bastard heart desires no matter how much it inconveniences me and no matter how much he flip flops between hating my entire existence and Immediately crying when I leave him alone for longer than five minutes because I'm still a cat owner and this is the type of insanity that consumes every single cat owner ever"""

Also includes:

• They/them gender neutral MC

• Customizable sprites for MC

• Voice messages with amazing voice acting

• You can choose if you want to see 18+ content or not, and the sex scenes can range from being inferred to very explicit

• Dom/sub/top/bottom/switch/vers MCs

• Multiple poly LIs

• Some stories allow you to switch LIs - play the same story with a different character so you can have your preference

• Treasure trove for the monster fuckers ft LIs like;

a.) Mythical beings like Medusa

b.) Extraterrestrials like aliens similar to the ones from Avatar

c.) Straight up furry content - like anthropomorphic animals

d.) Hybrids - humans with animal ears & tails

e.) Eldritch beings like Death

f.) Horror-esque characters like killer (?) clowns & ghouls

g.) Supernatural beings like demons and witches

h.) Not monsters but also: knights & pirates

• Also just normal average sweet LIs too

• My favourite: updated mod for unlimited gems

Part 2 of interesting routes

[isa-ghost]

I need the headcanons, Isa. I need them like I need air. (I also have had very little time to watch QSMP overall, so all of my q!Phil info comes from you) -River

OH FUCK I WASN'T EXPECTING TO GET MULTIPLE ASKS ABOUT THEM. /POS

Here's Headcanon Set 1

NOW MORE

He's an expert at playing stupid. I don't have any actual situations from canon off the top of my head to apply this to, but his wits are sharp enough for him to pull it off when shit isn't explosively hitting the fan

He hates not being able to fly, flying is/was the main way he would de-stress. Nothing makes him feel lighter than the breeze in his feathers and a breathtaking view

This man's commitment to The Bit is so underestimated. If The Bit was a person, it'd be part of his polycule. People just overlook his ability to commit to a bit because he has to personally find the bit worth committing to

Obligatory Shiny Good Crow Brain mention. Why do you think his backpacks need sorting like once every few weeks (though he neglects them for longer than that)? And shiny is not always literal. Sometimes it means flowers or pretty types of wood or a neat mob.

Every once in a while someone can get him to laugh in a way that Almost sounds like a squawk. He doesn't know how it happens, it's like an involuntary snort laugh, but with cawing.

Unfortunately for him, playfully raising his blood pressure (stares at the kids, Tubbo, the polycule, some others) is kinda funny. It's the way he gets louder the more exasperated he gets.

He has 100% slept so hard that he snored loud enough to earn a kick in the side from Chayanne

Speaking of sleep, this idiot will pass out in that wooden chair and then wake up in the morning and bitch about his neck aching as if he isn't the reason it's aching. Lullah especially has roasted him for this

His dedication to Chayanne and Lullah can go unmentioned bc it's just so obvious but I need everyone to understand it's not just how he'd burn the island to ashes for them. It's also how he'd stop mid-tea party with Lullah, Pomme & Co, dressed the whole nine yards in a tutu, tiara & obnoxious amounts of pretend jewelry to beat the ever-loving SHIT out of a threat

At first Irish Goodbyes were unintentional (which is what made them so funny) but now it's become one of the biggest bits he's committed to. This man loves embodying that gif of the dude going ✌🏻 and vanishing.

Lullah totally told him about the Duolingo "It's Spanish or Vanish" meme. It won't leave his head now

Anytime he does the reverb voice or something he is pulling a megaphone out of his backpack and yelling into it

Because I forgot it in the first hc set and it's too funny for me not to include, I must once again tap the sign that says "Phil and Fit fuck nasty behind Fit's gym." Why do you think the shit Fit says like "big boy" gets such a reaction out of Phil? He's heard it elsewhere

He thinks he has too much self-respect to do it but if he didn't, he'd 100% be the dad to dab or whip-nae nae just to make Chayanne and Lullah faceplant on the ground out of embarrassment

Speaking of faceplanting, Lullah is so good at timing when she does it, it absolutely kills Phil every time. It's like one of the Top 5 ways to get him to crack up

Calling back to the Bit Commitment hc: "The 4th Wall" is a bit he made up and won't stop referencing. It's not that he's fail rping in meta, he's getting conspiracy-style existential as a joke and that's why Lullah hates it so much

Stealing this one from my hcs about my angel OC inspired by Phil: If you put him in water, his wings will involuntarily flap like a bird in a bath. It isn't nonstop, it's like a stim he can't help doing every so often.

He loves Rose so much. She instantly makes him feel safe. He regularly has to resist the urge to passionately gush about her to people because he knows they'd be like What The Fuck Are You On About. Rose is blorbo from his brain (little does he know, she isn't entirely)

He likes to pretend he isn't, but he's sentimental as hell. Why do you think he hasn't changed the ugly dirt shack? Why do you think he has so many backpacks of stuff? He's got that crow hoarder brain but he also just attaches to things to easily. Nostalgia and love for history has him in a death grip. Little does he know, it's a trait he's kept from his past

Speaking of his past, until I get canon story explaining otherwise, in my mind he IS hardcore!Phil but the Federation wiped his memory after somehow managing to invite him to the island. The Ender King & Rose's arrivals into qsmp canon are two very different ways of attempting to trigger his memories. What he thinks are dreams are actually those forgotten memories of what he was doing before coming to the island

Okay that's long enough, look out for a third set because I got another ask waiting for more >:)

EDIT: Here's Set 3 :D

[itsdappleagain]

tagged by @emily-prentits THANK YOUU THIS LOOKS SO FUN

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

18!

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

141,974 words...which is a little embarassing considering jo, who tagged me, has 59 works and only about 30,000 more words. evidently i like my longfics.

3. what fandoms do you write for?

carmen sandiego 2019! 17 of those and one (1) original work that i dont mention in this post at all

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

the cardinal and the kitten - 325 kudos

say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime (let me lead you from your solitude) - 164 kudos (we call her the phantom au for short)

simple are the ways of love (simple as the touch of another's hands) - 156 kudos

Upon the Sword - 154 kudos

Everything is a Lie - 127 kudos

5. do you respond to comments?

Most of them yes!! I LOVE getting comments I screenshot and save every one I get.

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hm- I guess it depends. Hellscape ends with Carmen's internal monologue just before she gets mind-wiped by VILE, but its technically no angstier than canon. they gave you life (and in return you gave them hell) is pretty angsty the whole way through and examines Carmen's trauma.

Those are both little one-shots, though- I usually end my reigns of terror within chapter fics pretty happily if I can manage it. The Phantom AU (linked above) ends in a dark place but leagues brighter than it seemed to be heading towards. It isn't a terribly neat and happy ending, and it tells a story of trauma and attempted suicide and the road to recovery from these. Let's go with that one.

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

In Love Is A Locked Cell Door Chase Devineaux and Crackle happily start making out in a jail cell and live happily ever after!

Ok, being serious-

For a one-shot, simple (linked above) starts happy and ends happier.

For a chapter fic, Choice ends with Carmen, Julia, and Gray all living in a very happy polycule pardoned from the law with full emotional control of their lives which is fun :]

8. do you get hate on fics?

@emily-prentits used to leave passive aggressive comments on my wattpad and we would fight in the comments sections 💀now we're partners so make of that what you will. but anyway, no serious ones, no!

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

No, not really! I have a few "fade-to-blacks" or skip-overs without any detail. The one time I tried writing smut it was really forced and hard for me to write...doesn't help that I've never felt sexual attraction in my life so I don't know about that. Curse you asexuality for taking papertiger handcuff sex away from the world.

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you've written?

No, I'm not a fan of crossovers

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

I've had one or two...heavily referenced. Not in bad faith, but it was funny to see a lot of my plot and prose mannerisms reworded in a younger author's fic. I think they credited me as inspiration or gifted it to me both times so its not a big deal.

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

I have not!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

If FRANTIC FANFIC! counts, which it shouldn't lol. Also the polycule is working on something :3

14. what's your all time favourite ship?

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have an au where paper star and black sheep escape VILE together and go through a sort of friends to lovers to enemies deal as carmen (renamed cardinal here due to never escaping in the boat the way she does in canon), though influenced by paper star at the start, eventually finds her inevitable path of good while paper star slips into a chaos that cardinal just can't stomach

ill paste a snippet here that i wrote but its a little bit long and complex and i dont have a ton of motivation for it

16. what are your writing strengths?

ABILITY TO MAKE READERS SUFFER

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

cohesive plot...lord help me i cannot plan a fic to the end before i post chapter 1 and it bites me in the ass all the time

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

if there's a small amount of it, i usually write it as-is in the other language and use external sources or context clues to explain it. if a lot of dialogue is in another language, I'll put it in brackets and write it in english!

19. first fandom you wrote for?

carmen sandiego. still going lmfao

20. favorite fic you've written?

that's really hard- i'm going to do top three in no particular order SORRY

Love, Carmen - this was the first or one of the first fics I ever wrote. it put me on the map a little bit (wattpad..) in terms of writing and boosted upon the sword and choice when they came along. it was really fun to just be young and writing after finishing all two released seasons of the show. i still like it a lot. its just cute and simple.

the phantom au - what a labor of love. i've had other fics (evil carlotta series, cough cough) that have been long and complex but those strayed into meandering and pointless and i lost a lot of motivation. phantom combined my love of theater with my favorite show and my hunger for angst angst angst. it was super fun to write and, at the risk of sounding vain, i pulled off a very hard to pull off trope at the end and i think i did it well. i think if you read any one of mine, this highlights a lot of my strengths.

the cardinal and the kitten - this is a popular one of mine that kind of serves as an updated love, carmen. i really enjoy how i wrote carmen and julia playing off of each other and my dialogue is very strong in this one.

okay, sorry about how long that was i treated it like a professional interview. i had a lot of fun writing this instead of working on a very important school project

[theinfiknight]

List of top ten Bleach characters/pairs of characters who fuck the most, ranked in descending order by how much they fuck (as of where I am now in the show anyway)

10) These two fuckers from that filler arc:

They're basically a married couple with a kid there is no way they do not fuck on the regular

9) Those two clowns from the 13th Squad

I don't even know their names but between being Ukitake's foster kids and Rukia's foster parents the tension between them is unbearable. It absolutely certainly definitely reaches a breaking point every so often.

8) Kyoraku and Ukitake

They're annoying just to be in the same room with. Kyoraku will say some shit like "You see Ukitake-san, two parallel lines can travel together for eternity but will never meet" and Ukitake'll go "Ah, what a poetic observation, Kyoraku-san! Such a truly tragic fate!" and everyone else in the room has either left by now or are wishing they could either kill these two or themselves. This has been going on for centuries now and shows no signs of ever changing.

7) Madarame and Yumichika

Gayass dumbass duo. Literally there is no reason for them to behave the way they do. Yumichika will go "In the 11th Squad we will watch each other die without interfering for death is preferable to loss. This is the way of the Zaraki squadron" and then trip over his feet running off to save Ikkaku's ass in the same breath. They fuck but never acknowledge it ever.

6) Rangiku

She's way too competent and confident and appreciative of a good time to not be getting laid whenever she likes, barring the possibility that she's ace. Not much more needs to be said

5) This King:

He would be much higher on this list if he wasn't the subordinate of that crusty ass espada. You KNOW they keep him way too busy to fuck nearly as much as he'd like to.

4) Whatever the hell these four had going on:

I don't yet know their backstories but their interactions with each other, their vibes. Probably an extremely toxic polycule but you KNOW they fuck.

3) Yoruichi

Girl got the most game out of any character in the show, gives no fucks and takes no shit. The only reason she's not #1 is because the #1 and 2 positions are taken by people who fuck an unreasonable amount for human beings.

2) Aizen

Given the way the Espada talk about him you know he's drowning in that Arrancar meat. No further notes, absolutely rancid vibes, reeks of toxicity and would be drowning in bitches irl too.

1)

PEEPAW CAN FUCK!!

(disclaimer: I don't actually know their relationship, this is based on vibes alone)

[fogwitchoftheevermore]

Zedaph! And Grian too if that’s okay for the Blaseball AU

It should be noted that I fucked up on this one, Zedaph was supposed to have the blood type psychic and coffee style anything, but this mistake was funny enough that I left it. Anyways.

Zedaph Plays is a pitcher for the Yellowstone Magic. Worm Man, who is definitely a different person, ignore that they have the same exact soulscream and fate, don't worry about it, is a pitcher for the Ohio Worms. Zedaph spends the time he isn't playing (which isn't much) investigating the ever-expanding, ever-stranger depths of Yellowstone National Park, trying desperately to discover a new Blagonball, and spending far too much time in Arizona for a man who plays for teams located in Yellowstone and Ohio respectively.

Zedaph joined up with the Magic in season 1 as an excuse to get into Yellowstone and investigate the park. When the Expansion teams fell from the sky, he proposed to Skizz that it would be really funny if somebody who was already playing tried to sign up for one of those new teams, just to see if the league would let them. Skizz didn't talk him out of it, so Zedaph created an unsubtle alias and signed up to pitch for the Worms. The league let it happen, so he now pitches for two teams. He's been extremely lucky and only had to pitch for both teams on the same day once. Thankfully, the game in question was between the Magic and the Worms, so he was just running between the two dugouts and hoping no one noticed.

Zedaph is a shapeshifter. He usually defaults to a sheepy guy, and Worm Man is just a pinker version of him with pure white eyes. He also wears a mask but that's not apart of the shapeshifting. The rest of the Hermits know that Zedaph is a shapeshifter, and they all have some amount of suspicion that Worm Man and Zedaph are just the same guy, but most of them aren't willing to call him on it. Impulse and Tango are the outliers here because they get husband privileges, so they know. (ZITS polycule is cannon because duh) (poly hermits is ALSO cannon but no one else has husband privileges, you understand)

By the way, Worm Man and Zedaph don't actually have different blood types, though he could do that with his shapeshifting, he just lied on the intake forms so it wouldn't be as wildly suspicious that two players had the exact same soulscream.

Grian H. Dreamslayer is a right fielder for the LA Unlimited Tacos. He spends most of his time not playing Blaseball playing pranks, abandoning robot children ala Frankenstein, and trying to talk Pearl in to using her precognition abilities into helping him cheat at card games.

Grian was a season 1 player for the LA Tacos. He'd played community Blaseball in college and thought "hey this will be fun" and now he's stuck here. During the Grand Unslam, he was one of the few players to get his name fully restored because the fans thought "Dreamslayer" was a sick as hell name. He also got a middle initial on his paperwork as a side effect.

During the Grand Siesta, Grian got really weird and really bored and hosted Demise, which I've talked about a fair amount in the tag. He convinced himself that he was going to make the top 5 at least because of "plot armor" and got beaned in the head by a pitching machine Cub set up while he was monologuing about this to Tango.

Grian is an avian who mostly avoids using his wings during games in the name of fairness, but he's not immune to panicking when an umpire lights up and trying to fly away. Also he used to be a Watcher in this world but that means basically nothing in this universe, it was just this weird, stupid gang he was in when he was a teenager. Sometimes they show up on his doorstep and go "quit your emo band, re-join my gang" and he just slams the door in their face every time.

[draculovemp3]

for the character ask game: james wilson house md :3

I was asleep when I got this one but HAI^_^

Sexuality HC: worlds gayest heterosexual man . Bi but like he’s got a emotionally rough job and several alimonys to pay he’s not thinkin ab all that. Except when house is in the perimeter. If gay marriage was legal in NJ before 2013 the divorce number would be unimaginable ❤️.. Most importantly no matter the sexuality he’s a harlot

Gender HC: in similar above terms: world’s transsest cis man <3 ummm yea sure he’s cis w/e but also he’s so some trans guy. I also can Butchify anyone. Guards turn wilson into a masc woman

A ship I have with said character: gee i wonder…. Hilson should have been canon so they could be wilson divorce no.4. The divorce is just for fun bc house wants to flex the embarassing number of divorces & also have his own 1❤️. Happily toxic remarried. But idk that’s an average statement from Oscar hilsondivorce innit. Also house/cuddy/wilson is the unethical ethical polycule ever.

A BROTP I have with said character: the hypothetical interactions Wilson and Cameron had when he left ppth post-WH/HH is so special to Me…. Also um cuddy and wilson bitchy besties obv.

A NOTP I have with said character: IDFK whatever’s done boringly. I don’t vibe w the occasional cameron/wilson I’ve seen ig

A random headcanon: idk why but I think he reallyy likes sour candy :p also the first time he ever noticed a smidge of grey hair he freaked out and dyed it brown/match but noticing the nondifference stopped bothering after that one panic. also bc he knows it’d give house ammo to switch the dye w crazy colors more than he’s already tried before

General Opinion: tbf thru my first watch while I Did love him he wasn’t even top 5 charas. Thru my rewatch he’s making me insane❤️…. What the hell is up w this Guy. I need to open his gut up and see if he just has parasites that make him say & do All that:/ shoutout to awful Manwhores with hearts as big as their hair in media we don’t have enough of him

SEND ME A CHARACTER AND I’LL DO THE FOLLOWING^

[go-go-devil]

My friend @silenthillmutual tagged me to answer some fic writer's ask game questions, so without further ado...

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

17 as of right now.

2. What is your AO3 wordcount?

181,115

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mostly Hylics, but I've dabbled in several different fandoms. I've also written for the band Ghost, Pathologic, Knock-Knock, created the Neverending Nightmares tag on AO3 which still only contains the 3 fics I wrote for it, and am currently writing an epic novel-length Dark Souls fanfic!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1) Outcasts in an Overcast - 109

2) Dedusmuln Uncharted: The Hunt for the Paper Cup - 78

3) Molding A Legacy - 61

4) The Moon is Down - 60

5) Chaos Inverted - 51

Basically most of my Hylics fics lol 🌙 🎸🌯

5. Do you respond to comments?

I always try to respond to every comment I get since it's not often that I get any. There were a few that ended up slipping through the cracks of my memory, and to those I'm sorry since it now feels kinda weird to respond to a comment written years ago, but mostly if you see a comment that I haven't answered it most likely means I've already responded to the person on another social media site.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Definitely a tie between The Moon is Down and Chaos Inverted, but frankly that's to be expected since Gibby's such a doomed character. Out of all the blorbos I had to write Shakespearean levels of angst for it somehow ended up being the clay alien who's head looks like an orange and/or zoopals plate XD

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Ironically it's a Pathologic fic I wrote two years ago called Like A Fire Melting Us Down. Basically a hurt/comfort fluff fic featuring Murky and Daniil bonding over both being autistic. It's probably the only fic I've written fic I've written that has a definitively happy ending, as in there's no room for darker speculation for the future or anything like that.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully no. If anyone out there doesn't like my fics they've done good not to harass me about it.

9. Do you write smut? If so, which kind?

No.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest crossover you’ve ever written?

The only crossovers I've written thus far both involve the game Knock-Knock; either the Lodger interacting with Thomas Smith from Neverending Nightmares or Daniil Dankovsky from Pathologic.

The latter comes from the fic Intruder, which I'm most proud of of all the crossovers I've done so far, yet I'm kinda surprised no one else has attempted this themselves or entertained the idea of my fic since Knock-Knock was what inspired Pathologic: The Marble Nest to begin with. I guess it's true that there are only 12 Western Knock-Knock fans left on the internet...

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Also thankful this hasn't happened yet.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but if anyone wants to please let me know. I'd be more than happy for my stories to cross language barriers!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

One time my fellow Hylics fic veteran bombcollar wrote a story called Dedusmuln's Dossier, which is all about Dedusmuln documenting all of the enemies in Hylics 2, and which I contributed two pieces of writing for The Hand of Moodbleen and Carassius! It's an awesome fic I recommend any Hylics fan check out, and I had some good fun thinking of what I wanted them to say about these two uniquely annoying enemies.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Goddammit I don't fucking know lmao. I don't take shipping as seriously as other people do. For now I'll say Burakhovsky for all the beautiful art I've seen for it, the Hylics crew being in a queerplatonic polycule and, just to throw an insane curve ball at everyone in the room, Siegmeyer/Domhnall ;-)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I'm gonna finish 'em all one day. I will not leave my children to rot in the pits of Writer's Block Hell...

16. What are your writing strengths?

I've been told by many people that they tend to really love the way I write dialogue for each of the characters I work with, original or already created. I'm also a lover of environmental descriptions and am always trying to build upon and improve in that aspect into my works.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Probably fight scenes since I've had so little practice, and due to a lot of the books I read not really having that many. I'm hoping To The Accursed can help me improve on that front, since Dark Souls is so heavily combat-oriented.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I haven't gone farther than using singular words in other languages as of right now. That's something I'm definitely gonna need to step up on later down the line, particularly since there will be Dark Souls characters I'll be writing soon who will be speaking some sentences in Latin and Welsh respectively.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The Swedish metal band Ghost! It was a story called For A Divine Cause which was about Papa Emeritus Primo realizing he suffers stage fright right before he's supposed to start touring for the first album, and thus summons his younger brother Terzo to help shape him up into being a good front man.

It's without question the worst of my fics from a writing and technical perspective, but it was the first one I ever wrote so that's kinda to be expected. I am pleasantly surprised it has so many kudos and bookmarks after all these years!

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Honestly, I'm think I'm gonna have to make it a tie between Dedusmuln Uncharted and Chaos Inverted.

The first is the fic where I truly started getting more creative in my writing (and is my first full made podfic which I'm even more proud of!), while the latter was sooooo much fun to write and gave me the confidence to write novellas. The Hylics fandom has been so supportive of my work, and I thank you all for being the best fandom experience I've ever had <3

That was fun! I'll tag @bombcollar, @pinkiepiebones, and @brainshock-alpha for this one ✏️✨

[the-crow-binary]

Top 5 reasons Mactor is secretly best ship? :3

5. Yes.

4. It's our two respective blorbos kissing LIKE HOW CAN IT GO MORE PEAK THAN THAT. WE'RE LITERALLY JUST TAKING EACH OUR FAVORITE DOLLS AND MAKING THEM HOLD HANDS. THAT'S WHY BEST SHIP IDC.

3. They have no one but each other (well, in the "Mathias somehow ended up in pre-CV3 Castlevania" scenario, at lest), Mathias for the obvious reason that he knows no one and everyone is evil and wicked ESPECIALLY Dracula and the only person to be nice to him is Hector, and Hector because he slowly start to realise how not okay his relationship with Dracula is, and Isaac hates him, and no one else in the Castle is trustworthy, there's no one he could call a "friend" anymore. And it makes them cling to each other more. They're a healthy and actually "good" version of Hecula and it's cute but also it HURTS because EVEN THEN THEY CAN NEVER BE TOGETHER BECAUSE LORE AND CANON AND MATHIAS HAS TO GO HOME EVENTUALLY AND HECTOR CANNOT FOLLOW AND MATHIAS WILL BECOME DRACULA ANYWAY AND AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA PAIN.

2. Lord/Knight relationship mixed with pious man/sinner who worships the pious man more than he would ever worship God himself relationship, wich offer such a delicious dynamic <3 The knight who's whole life and skills are based on sinning against God, who he has only disdain for. And yet he choses to follow and protect a man who's whole life revolves around SERVING God. And the Lord respects the knight for his skills and passion and devotion, even though he doesn't entirely agree with him. And the knight doesn't agree with his vision of God but he accepts it because what matters to him is his Lord as a person, and his Lord is the only God he is willing to follow (almost) blindly. There's something magnetic attracting them to the other. They're literally so cool I LOVE THEM also. they're kinky af.

1. They're literally made for each other. Both linked to Dracula in a particular way (him from the past/him if he didn't let his anger and grief take the best of him :) ), they both have this tendency to not get attached to many people, but damn, when they do get attached, they get A-TTACHED. "I would kill and die for you" KIND OF ATTACHED. They share a passion for alchemy, Hector actually studied from Mathias and the Cronqvist family's books, so it makes their relationship extra special <3 Hector needs someone to worship and dedicate his life to, Mathias feel like he shouldn't like that but he is weaker than he likes to admit <3 (taking God's place is a sin, he's pretty sure. but hey, it's not like he can change Hector, so, might as well :)) They both admire the other in some way. Mathias is the brain, Hector the brawn, so they complete each other too... so many ways in wish they can make you go "ah, yes, those two are literally soulmates <3" even reasons i didn't mention because little brain forgot at the moment BUT STILL (also depending on wich version of Mactor it is... They can bond over their hatred and grief after their respective wives died :) And it can lead them to bring each other even deeper in hell, instead of lifting each other up like in a pre-wives death Mactor scenario <3). It all hurts even more when you think about the fact they are doomed from the start. Never meant to stay together forever. :') Fated to separate at one point, wether they want to or not. :') (but scratch that i want to imagine Hector going with Mathias to his era and them and Leon forming a raw gay sex polycule and be happy)

So yeah, the them <3 The “God has never once shown that he cares about me, therefore he is not my Lord. You are.” them <3 The "Please, i am begging you, don't let go of me" them <3 The "I don't like who you worship/serve but I cannot get enough of you" them <3 I cannot wait for someone to release a fic showing how peak they are :)

[marezelle]

20 Questions

tagged by both @toopunkrockforshul and @writingordinaryrealities so I guess I'd better do it LOL

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

18!

2. What’s your total AO3 words count?

202,063

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently only Greenwing & Dart by Victoria Goddard. In the past I wrote a teeny bit of Legend of Korra fic, and then one Check, Please! fic and one Pokemon fic.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

falling and falling and falling, A Beifong Woman's Guide to Getting the Girl, tender is the night, to face unafraid the plans that we made, and protective measures

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to, and I usually do immediately after I post a fic. (I always end up running behind, though.) I do so because I am genuinely SO grateful to everyone who reads and comments on my stories. Every comment is a gift.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

To call it angst is perhaps overselling the yearning happening there, but probably protective measures.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I had to go back and look at fics I've barely even thought about in years, but probably tender is the night, tbh.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope! I am not a popular writer. (thank god)

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I have begun to dabble, though I don't know how to quantify it? it's smut. LOL

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I still have that unfinished Carol-inspired Check, Please! au. I'm probably never going to go back to it, but I maintain that the vibes were immaculate.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Don't think so!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not yet, but how cool would that be?

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

No, and tbh the idea of doing so is intimidating as hell, but I'm sure it would be fun.

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

What do you mean "favorite"? I'm supposed to pick? I can't even pick a current favorite, considering I'm writing a whole polycule of various ships for G&D and I love them all.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I've accepted that my older unfinished works are going to stay that way, but sometimes I do think about The Journey. The end of that fic was going to involve Jinora and Opal leaving the Eastern Air Temple, to be followed by a sequel where they travelled to Zaofu, then the Southern Water Tribe, and then through the Fire Nation. The third story in the series would have brought them to Republic City, where they would establish Air Temple Island. The story as I began it just had too many plot holes, though, and I ended up losing interest in the primary romantic relationship.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I do a decent job with pacing. It turns out that I'm good at planning out a cohesive narrative that will play out over the course of a series; working out the snags is part of the fun. I like when unnoticed details are given greater/changed meaning or depth later on. (I learned that from @ourimpavidheroine!) Oh and my friends say I write pining well, LOL.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Figuring out plots driven by anything but the characters' emotional beats. (This is why I've written thousands of words of fanfic this year, and simply cannot get an original novel out of the planning stages.) I so wish I could write a complicated political plot, or a mystery, but I think those things are beyond me. Weaving in description alongside dialogue is also tricky for me, I always feel like I fall into using the same phrases over and over.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I don't speak any other languages well enough to do it, but it would be very neat.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Pokemon, *way* back in the day.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

*gasp* How dare you make me pick just one. I guess it has to be hello, my old heart, though. I just am so proud of that fic. It's not just that it's the kind of thing that I've dreamed of writing for a long while (slowburn, lots of yearning, LONG) but that I managed to do it during a summer where I was struggling with just about everything else in my life. I'm very fond of the world it's set in, and I have so many plans for both prequels and sequels to it.

I'm tagging @ourimpavidheroine, @assistant-blogkeeper, and anyone else who thinks this would be fun! (no pressure to play along, though <3)

[leonidasmmii]

🤝 & ❤ one of those romantic ones better be one with anna.... 👀 JAKBJEGFH jk love you! 😋

Top five platonic OC relationships:

1. JOSH AND KAT. They love each other and show it by bullying each other. Josh pissing their father off when he's in a poor mood to make sure he goes off on him and Kat patching him up as she tears into him. Kat getting her heart broken again and again and Josh always just 'it's okay, I'm here, I've got you.' They're bitchy to everyone except their younger siblings this includes each other but they are also So Soft...

2. Marcus and Anna. They're not siblings but you wouldn't know it watching them interact. He's the annoying older brother who she goes feral around. For those who don't know, Anna is Very Shy. And Marcus just makes her go feral. She will wrestle with one (1) individual and it is because she hates him but she loves him. He's an asshole and she's a brat and they are So Fond of each other.

3. Jess and Anna. Same vibes, but Jess is very much the 'I'm right and you know it, shit head!' She will tease Anna relentlessly and Anna is just 'Shut your mouth or I'm gonna beat you up.' Will not wrestle, Anna might strangle her though.

4. Fia and Charlie. They're siblings, you may notice a theme here. They are also just 'I'll kick your ass.' *Someone says they'll kick their ass too* 'WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU DON'T GET TO THREATEN THEM!' The 'I only I get to pick on you' vibes. Y'know.

5. Anna and Ginnie at Jess/Hannah. They look at these two idiots who pine for years while being so obvious and So Oblivious and just go 'yeah I'll suffer through this to be friends with you.' Jess/Hannah is sosososo stupid, the group has one braincell and Ginnie and Anna have to share it.

BONUS BECAUSE I WANNA TALK ABOUT IT 6. Kat and Anna. Anna is the nervous quiet one and Kat is the school ice queen and she runs into Anna and Anna is so ready to get ripped into but Kat's just 'I'm sorry, are you okay?' and Anna's genuine bafflement at this just has Kat going 'Oh you're pathetic. You're mine now.' Anna is a half drowned kitten to Kat, and Anna just looks at her buying things for her and goes 'Oh you don't have to' 'But I wanna' 'But-' 'And I'm gonna.' '...Okay.'

Top five romantic OC relationships:

1. IDIOTS POLYCULE. Jackson, the horny one, being a horrible influence on John and Anna, who are also very horny, but quiet about it. John, introducing Anna to Xanax and Anna's Whole world changing. Will just 'hi, have food. Have food. Have food. I made you this thing. Does it make your life easier?' and the entire group just melting every time. John writing poems and sonnets and stories about his loves. Josh just 'I can't say it but have this drawing of us as your favorite movie couple. I got hurt protecting you. You carved off a piece of my heart and you're holding it in your hands, do you understand?' Anna just. Leaning and holding hands and cuddling when she normally doesn't like touch because they're hers. Jackson is always gentle and slow and listening and. Do you understand? Do you understand what these buffoons do to me? Do you know the depth of love I have for them?

2. Kat/Cindy/Melody. Cindy and Melody are together and they look at Kat and go 'Should we? Would you be okay with that?' Cindy flirting outright with Kat, showing a little cleavage, and Kat later just 'but does she like me????' while everyone beats their head against a wall. Melody grabs her by the face and says they love her and Kat still manages to delude herself into thinking it's friendly. Cindy and Melody put up with So Much trying to bring this woman into their relationship.

3. Jess/Hannah. As stated before, very oblivious. Hannah sitting in Jess's lap, referring to her as Her Jess, very very flirty. Jess just 'My Hannah, No Touch,' clingy and possessive but never trying to stop her from doing anything. Everyone around them is just 'GUYS, COME ON' as they continue to be the most couple-ish not couple in existence.

4. Jackson/Anna in specific, because Anna will run away from him if he gets to be too much, at which point he sits outside the room she's locked herself in and whines at her like the dramatic slut he is. He gets her very horny and she is constantly embarrassed about it.

5. John/Will too. Because they're the cozies motherfuckers in the world. Homemade food and hot chocolate, curled up under a fuzzy blanket on the couch, John playing with Will's hair as he reads to him. They are So Domestic and So Cozy.

[victorluvsalice]

AU Thursday: A Smattering of Random Valicer Headcanons

Mostly relating to the standard Modern AU, of course, but the more general ones could apply to any iteration:

-->You know how I have January 8th as “Smiler’s Creation Date” on the Valice( r) Calendar? Well, in thinking of what I wanted to do for it in the shower a couple of days ago, I referred to it as “Smiler’s birthday,” corrected myself with “no, wait, Smiler’s birthdate is the opening date of the coaster, May 31st” --

And then remembered “my human Smiler is ADOPTED -- maybe that’s their adoption day?”

So yeah -- Smiler’s actual birthday is 5/31, but the Altons have another little celebration on 1/8 because that’s when the paperwork all became official and Smiler was fully and legally their kid. Smiler was actually sad when they first learned that other kids just get the ONE birthday.

-->Smiler has a real talent for mixing drinks, both alcoholic and non -- they just seem to have a knack for eyeballing measurements and knowing how much stirring is enough. Any party they throw, they play bartender and knock their guests’ socks off.

-->Related to the above, Smiler’s job while attending college is as a barista in a coffee shop, where they develop a reputation for somehow getting even the most complicated order perfect. They like it when people’s faces light up after having one of their drinks! (Though that does make the “Karens” stand out even more, sadly. . .like this one couple who came in, the wife with a really complicated order that she kept criticizing them on as they tried to make it, and the husband with a simpler order that he refused to leave a tip on, saying it was unnecessary. . .guess how Smiler first met Victor’s parents.)

-->In keeping with the tech theme of the actual coaster, I’ve decided that Smiler, like Victor, enjoys building little robots from kits! They generally do more complicated projects than Victor does, though (hell, maybe they’ve done a mini-toy-like take on the Marmalizer, jokingly calling it their “brainwashing bot”), and they’re better at learning code and programming them. They’re also decent with HTML, as evidenced by the fact that, you know, they have a website with videos and suchlike. :p

-->Victor, for his part, gets into repairing and modifying things -- he finds he enjoys learning how things work and how to fix them, or make them work better, or even just look cooler. And he becomes a “right to repair” advocate after he discovers just how fiddly fixing electronics in this day and age can be, and how expensive it is for most people to replace them.

-->Constantly sending them to practice yoga in Sims 4 when I wasn’t sure what else to do with them has cemented in my head that Smiler just does yoga in general! In that same “crop top and short shorts” outfit that they so often wear as a Sim. Victor finds it very distracting. XD

-->Also, as mentioned in the tags of another post, I’ve recently realized that Smiler’s favorite animal is frogs! Probably as a result of all the breeding and collecting I had them do in Sims 4. They just think they’re neat. :) They also like dragonflies too.

-->Some new food headcanons for the trio -- all of their favorite fruits are also involved in their favorite desserts! Victor likes apples, and absolutely loves a good apple pie; Alice favors strawberries, and really enjoys a strawberry cake; and Smiler likes bananas, and will devour a banana split (they also like bananas foster). I think “chocolate cake” would rank as a second-favorite dessert for all of them though -- and I can see them working their way together through one of those big old “bucket” sundaes you can get at Ben & Jerry’s. (Though that would probably best be handled with the help of Victoria and Emily, and/or Oblivion, Th13teen, Rita, and Galactica. . .probably be a good date idea for the Running Headlong Into The Bullshit mega-polycule too XD)

-->As hinted at in the Christmas headcanons post, I’m tempted to have Alice pick up her father’s love of photography to capture special moments. It seems a fun way to carry on the family legacy! Though, yeah, this is something a modern Alice would be more keen on than a Victorian Alice for sure -- less dangerous chemical bullshit going on!

-->This one is a headcanon-in-progress -- part of me feels like Smiler should have or get a tattoo, but I’m not sure where or what. Something fun and colorful, sure, but beyond that. . .I’ve experimented with adding a tattoo in Sims 4′s CAS to my Smiler Always, but nothing really looked right. (Possibly because all of them are tied to such specific parts of the body -- I’d really like it if you could move certain tattoos to different locations!) Hmmm. We’ll see if this one goes anywhere as a result!

[catboynutsack]

Random hopes for FFXIV Dawntrail in no particular order from a person who's currently about to start the title quest Endwalker (so don't spoil the dungeon/fights and any post EW content)

New playable species outside of female Hrothgar; specifically another animalistic species similar to Miqo'te/Viera in that they're much more humanoid with animal features rather than anthropomorphic animals (like Hrothgar.) Biggest hopes are for a bird like race (similar to Meteion, I love harpies so much and while I know she's a familiar it would be cool to see a playable species based on her) or fish people (similar to Dungeons and Dragons Tritons, again I love mermaids and fish-like people so much.)

Random and small, I'd like to see canonical ages established within the game, maybe with like nameday celebrations of some kind for some characters. It would be so cute to have a birthday party for Alisaie and Alphinaud, I would die for those little dweebs and they're still technically kids and you KNOW their mom would go nuts for a celebration for them. I know there's been canon age mentions in additional content like books and such but ingame would be nice.

Viera hats for the love of God. I'm not a 3D artist and idk the process but it can't be that hard can it?? I know there's a whole design aspect involved bc Big Ol Ears but like. Square Enix is a huge company, surely they can allocate some resources to actually make clothing appear on an entire very popular race. If it's more complicated than I know then forgive me 3D artists, I love what y'all do I'm just uneducated on it 💛

Random as hell again and probably more suited towards an update than a new expansion but. I'd really like them to sorta retcon (is that the right word? Idk it's 3:20 am and I cant sleep) primal weapons so all primals have weapons for all classes. I'd kill for an ice scythe from the Extreme Shiva battle from HW or a pair of Leviathan Chakrams for my Dancer. I know that levelling is an issue but if they were, say, available via trading totems from the fight and synced to their class's lowest level I'd think that could work. Idk as someone who loves primal themed glams but mains Dancer and Reaper it drives me bananas that it's so limited.

A new Important female character that Doesn't Fucking Die or is somehow written off in the same pack for the love of God I swear they disproportionately kill off/write off female characters (I miss Moenbryda and Ysayle every day)

More romantic emotes/activities outside of the ceremony of eternal bonding! Not only is my partner very busy and we often have little FFXIV dates rather than in person things, I'm in a polycule and by the time I started playing my partner was already married ingame to my metamor (my partner's other partner) so I'm locked out of some emotes like the embrace emote while they aren't and it kinda sucks. It would be nice to be able to be romantic with them outside of /blowkiss and /hug and to be able to do couples content outside of the ceremony of eternal bonding. Maybe just a me problem though.

Un-gender all clothing items. I want my male character to wear a craftable bikini top goddamnit, it's fun. Plus it's a beachy-themed expansion afaik so it would make sense to un-gender the bathing suits

Speaking of craftable bikini tops, more craftable clothing for glams and not just combat!!! Cute bathing suits and the such that are level 1 and meant exclusively for glams would be amazing. We have a few already but with the upcoming theme being seemingly being beaches it seems appropriate.

Longer hairstyles. Clipping be damned my miqo'te would rock a long hair look (and his braid, which is the same hairstyle as Fourchenault's, already clips into every top ever so like. C'mon)

Number 1 on this list is the new species being humanoid with animal features. I eat that shit up with a spoon. I love making OCs and a new alt devoted to a species I like is absolutely in the books. Already have done it twice lol.

Improve Aurum Vale for the love of God that dungeon is a nightmare and it's like one of three that ever shows up on rouls on Dynamis

Anyways if any of this bothers you for any reason please just scroll by, these are my middle of the night daydreams when I can't sleep of things that I personally would enjoy in the game, I know my ideas don't apply to everyone and all of them wouldn't really make sense for one reason or another but it's fun to write them down and put them out into the world. And obviously this post isnt gonna make a difference in the game itself, I'm just a rando on Tumblr lol. Thank you <3

[vixenscratch]

ADGKHAKLDFJG so much all of this.

I have a very few characters that, if there was actually a fandom to address, I'd maybe respectfully ask "hey, this character is 100% gay/straight/ace and I'd kinda appreciate if you don't write them as anything else." (Off the top of my head, Roxeen, Aesuan, and Myen. (Maybe Socks, though technically I think his sexuality is more along the lines of indifference than acespec; he's definitely some flavor of romantic whether that be het/bi/pan/demi.) I have plenty other characters who are mono/asexual, but those three are... IDK. I can't articulate why I don't really want them portrayed off-canon sexuality-wise.) Would I be terribly upset if someone decided they really wanted to ship the three/four of them as a weird allosexual polycule? Nah, not really. Crackship your little freaky heart out if that's what your heart desires, and I'll still appreciate that you like my characters enough to engage.

But yeah. Bi/pan/foo representation is both difficult with monogamous characters (especially since many stories with romantic elements aren't long enough for serial monogamy to become a factor), and something that, like... I'm not terribly invested in representation. But bi erasure is pervasive enough in queer communities already, we don't need it in fandom discourse.

It probably doesn't hurt that I'm a sucker for If It's You It's Okay. I've got multiple characters who, canonically, have The One Exception type relationships in one way or another (in one case it's more pragmatism from someone who thinks there's no fish in the sea for them, but it's understood to be just that by all parties and they do care about each other). In general I tend to like writing relationships with… sexuality being something of a minimal concern. Like, it affects whom the character is attracted to, but they go for the object of their attraction because of that attraction, not because the person matches their sexual preference. Maybe that’s splitting hairs or maybe I just don’t get how romantic attraction works for other people, IDK.

In a similar vein, if you write a character as gay after Season 1, and they unequivocally declare themselves as straighter than a laser beam in Season 2, far as I'm concerned you didn't write them off canon; at worst you're canon-divergent. Because going by the canon as it exists at the point of writing is the most anyone can do.

(Hell, in the case of Chilchuck, I have one AU where the separation from his wife was a bit more mutual, and “more gay than he realized” was a factor. Because, like… that’s a thing that happens, and for that particular AU it was what I wanted.)

there is always going to be something a little off-putting to me about claiming a definitive canon sexuality for a character that doesn't actually have one.

like, we all have our headcanons, of course. and that's fine. but there's a world of difference between "i headcanon this character as gay" and "this character is gay in canon", and so frequently the latter isn't even true. if it's not stated in the source material nor by the creator, then it isn't canon. and that's okay!!

like, okay, it doesn't affect me anyway because no listed sexuality could ever stop me from shipping what i want to, but also... this is so often just an excuse to be mad at people for shipping "the wrong thing". it also tends to dip really uncomfortably into biphobic/panphobic territory.

to use a relevant example, unless ryoko kui has officially stated marcille and/or falin are lesbians (i don't think she has?), you cannot act like they are canonically. not only do they have no in-canon definitive romance (because dunmeshi is not a romance story), but even if you interpret their bond as queer (and like, most of us do, i certainly do), that doesn't for sure mean they only like women. you can headcanon that they do, but you can't harass other fans for not treating them that way. you have to accept that they will both be shipped with men, and it's not homophobia unless the shipper in question is actually, you know, being homophobic about it.

nothing another fan does will ever change what happened in canon, nor alter your own fanwork. you can do whatever you want forever. if someone making your fave blorbo a sexuality you don't agree with pisses you off, block them. if they ship things you hate so much that it makes you mad, block them. you're allowed to. this is your space to curate as you please.

people on the other side do it, too. "ummm chilchuck has a wife" is something i've seen slung at m/m ships for him. not only does his canon wife (who, you know, left his ass, stop acting like shipping him with anyone else is unreasonable on that alone) not preclude headcanoning him as gay if you want to, but it ABSOLUTELY doesn't preclude him being bisexual. for fuck's sake. gay and straight are not the only sexualities. i'm going to drop the contents of a dirty litterbox on your head.

like... genuinely, headcanon whatever you want. you could make everyone in the cast the same exact sexuality if you wanted to. what you shouldn't be doing is acting like anyone else is beholden to your ideas. or, hell, even canon's ideas. fandom is about the freedom to do what you want with your blorbos. have fun with it and stop blaming other fans for not making the content YOU want.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Lost Tomb Reboot Lewks: Part 12

(Masterpost) (Other Canary Stuff)

Warning: Spoilers for both seasons of The Lost Tomb Reboot

Look 61

The first look is Wu Xie’s road trip outfit, which includes this grey and white jacket. It has a contrasting elastic waistband, cuffs, and neckline, and slanted pockets. 

This is exactly the sort of jacket that my 5th grade science teacher would have worn in 1979, and she would have slayed in it.  She awakened something in me and it wasn’t love of STEM. (Spock was responsible for my love of STEM, and various other awakenings in 5th-grade me) I’m sure it would still look great on her, because she is probably a silver haired foxy granny now, and that’s who this jacket belongs on in the current century.

Wu Xie should never have gotten within a mile of this old lady jacket.

To clarify, I’m not being gender-essentialist here; I’m being ageist. If this jacket had some contemporary detailing or interesting features to offset its last-century vibe, the way Bai Haotian’s green roller derby jacket does, it would be fine even though I’m not a fan of this sort of collar in menswear. But it’s just a nicely-made old lady jacket. Mary Berry could bake a nice cake while wearing this jacket. 

Note: Liu Sang could wear the hell out of this jacket, of course, because that man can wear literally anything and make it look like it’s made of spun pheromones.

(more after the cut!)

Wu Xie eventually improves this look by taking the jacket off and giving the camera operator a nice long look at his ass. He’s wearing dark jeans and a long-sleeve white thermal shirt, which is a great improvement. 

Look 62

The granny jacket is contrasted by the blessed arrival of Huo Daofu’s daddy jacket, and the rest of the clothing that Huo Daofu is wearing with it.  This is a dark green jacket with a nipped in waist, military styling, and invisible stitching that says "obey" You can't see it, but oh, it's there.

He's wearing this jacket of domination with jeans so tight they appear to be made of paint. I approve of these jeans so much that I might need to take a break from writing for a moment. 

Instead of shoes he’s opted for a pair of tall riding boots, just in case anyone failed to get the message.

He finishes off this look with gold rimmed glasses, pomegranate-toned lips, and an air of authority so strong that even Pangzi does what he tells him to with minimal back chat.

Later the jacket comes off, so he can wrap it solicitously around the shoulders of a person who is already wearing a perfectly good jacket.  OP looks up “service top” in the dictionary.

Underneath, Huo Daofu is wearing a grey houndstooth waistcoat. Shen Wei’s tailor would gnash his teeth in envy, if he saw the cut of this vest. This tops off a warm-toned brown shirt worn with a silver-toned watch. The watch is...round, and it tells time. He’s wearing a brown belt with his black jeans. Huo Daofu is great at combining warm and cool, formal and casual, in a single look. 

Look at this dapper bitch. Slaying this hard has got to be against his Hippocratic oath.

This jacket-free look is combined with hip posture so provocative that it sends Wu Xie into a hasty search for the last scraps of his heteronormative assumptions. Xiao Bai does her best to help.

Look 63

The beards. 

OP's family of origin is full of hairy visigoths, so Pangzi's beard is a style I've encountered before, alas. We call this a [US] Civil War beard. This one is terrible and lopsided, but at least it covers a lot of Pangzi’s face.

Wu Xie’s fake facial hair isn't terrible, but isn't great. You can tell it’s fake because everything about Zhu Yilong is inherently lovely, and this isn’t. 

Also, it's a ridiculous idea for a disguise. Wu Xie's close-trimmed chin patch and mustache are nice style, very typical for a Chinese dude. They let Wu Xie’s lovely facial structure continue to do its thing while they just provide a bit of an accent. But this is a problem, because they don't change his appearance in any meaningful way; his cheekbones are still visible from orbit. 

He’s wearing this facial hair and cap with the same vest he wore earlier to practice slingshot. This time he's accessorizing with a simple tan jacket, with an interesting buttonhole detail... 

...and with an attractive human IV stand.

Doctor doctor, give me the news, I've got a bad case of loving you you loving me.

Look 64

This look belongs to the man that Jia Kezale’s wife has replaced him with. We have to infer his look based on his shoes, and that he is presumably in the same league as the extremely hot Jia Kezale. 

Based on these shoes, which are very nice, if a little weathered, Huarache-style loafers, this other man in her life also presumably wears linen trousers and a guayabera shirt. 

*mentally pictures this person* 

ok, I guess I don't blame her. 

[Image, and shirts, from cubavera dot com]

Look 65

After having his IV fluids, Wu Xie goes for a nighttime motorbike ride, because he apparently needs to go way up on a hill to see that the hotel he’s staying in is circular.

So, what is with the Ultraman motorcycle helmet? Does it have any padding or insulation at all? Why doesn’t it cover more than 40 percent of his head and face?

And shouldn't it have a chin strap?  How does it stay on in a crash?  I mean yes I know this is a show with sentient crustaceans...yeah, never mind. I’m sure that’s a super effective helmet. 

Once the rain starts, his mustache and beard look better. Still not great, but better. Here he looks like he’s cosplaying as Zhou Yunlan.

Now he’s wet and lying on the ground because...oh, hell if I remember. Just look at him, poor moist snookums. He needs a blankie and a hot tea and a hurt-comfort fic about him and his doctor. 

This look gives the newest members of the polycule an opportunity to demonstrate their devotion, as they haul him off the motorcycle and over to a wall, and then continue to stand in the rain, for some reason, instead of going indoors. 

I gotta say, when a producer decides to pour water on Zhu Yilong, they  commit to it.

Speaking of commitment, here’s Huo Daofu holding his hand up over Wu Xie’s face like a tiny umbrella. 

Bonus 1

Look at the yellow duffle coat on that kid. She looks beautiful and classic, and the mustard yellow color just pops so nicely in this scene. 

The mustard yellow also visually marks her allegiance to gold-dragon-wearing Xue Wu. 

Bonus 2

This look is Wu Xie’s antique-scheming outfit, but now he is wearing the Sunglasses of Manpain. They belong to Pangzi, but Wu Xie is wearing them while he waits for Pangzi to collect his angst from the morgue.

These sunglasses are good to wear while contemplating the fact that, despite the many differences in narrative tropes between Chinese and Western media, the one where a female character is hurt and/or dies merely to further a male character's emotional development remains a constant.

That said, this is a nice small signifier of their relationship, as he puts these glasses on Pangzi, allowing him to hide his feelings, while hugging him, allowing him to express his feelings.