#Thurburt Mudget Waxstaff III

[localcanadiancreature62]

My stance on how i treat my blorbos ISN'T "I can fix them" "I can make them worse". It's actually "I'll break them and THEN fix them". Like they'll go through the most traumatic, unimaginable horrors ever and they'll get therapy as well as a drinky drink if they were a good sport about the Horrors™. You see i like to see my faves heal,but to see them heal i have to hurt them.

Rant under the cut.

I'm not like other angst writers who are allergic to happiness *looks at my mutuals Aria and Angst*. They just have to go through a horrifically terrible time before having a good time. I literally give all of my faves more baggage than they already have only to fix it soon after pfft. Also i don't like sad endings,i physically cannot write them, because i will Cry. Like what even is the point of making them go through the Horrors if they come out as an unrecognizable husk after?. I break them and i fix them,but other people just break them break them break them break them break them until there's nothing left. Like i get where you're coming from. Becoming totally changed by trauma that there's no coming back is interesting. But like,bruh. Not my cup of tea. K rant over. Thank you for listening to my ted talk.

[aria-greenhoodie]

Thinking more about the Anti-Bill society and you know? Fuck it, Abigale Blackwing pants. Don’t care that it was illegal for women to wear pants in her time period. She deserves pants.

Click for Quality!

[father-opimm]

That minging Thurburt made me make this "account" for the "Internet"..

(I finally made an account for the journalist's husband! :D. It's me @localcanadiancreature62!. I made this for @chaseerr0rcode's Anti Cipher Society side blog thing so i could be with them and @aria-greenhoodie loll).

Text for O'Pimm will be like this and text for me will be like this. This is a rp-ish sideblog and asks as well as interactions are highly encouraged. Talk to the grumpy and embittered priest,he won't be too mean :].

TAGS

#those lunatics (posts about the other Anti Cipherites)

#non drinking activities (things that O'Pimm would reblog if he had a tumblr)

#sermons (posts about O'Pimm)

#mod (posts about me,the creator of this blog)

#thurburt (gay ass posts that remind him of his dear the journalist)

#the blasted demon (posts about Bill)

#home (posts about the 1800s that remind him of his home time period)

RULES

• This version of O'Pimm ended up in 2024 after he and Thurburt were testing out Abigale's time machine,and thus they'll be staying here until the inventress manages to pinpoint them both. This explains why the priest has homesickness in a way.

• Don't try to fuck the priest. Don't. Only suggestive-mildly explicit things like being shirtless or dirty talk is fine tho.

• I won't immediately get to your ask! /gen. I have more hyperfixations than these victorian gays and the Anti Cipher Society soo don't get mad when i don't receive it lol.

• O'Pimm won't know what the fuck you're talking about if it's anything related to the modern world. Be patient with him.

• There will be a lot of mentions of drinking here as O'Pimm is known to be an alcohol,be warned.

• My version of him is kindaaa mean so i'm sorry if he ends up coming off as too harsh in responses ^^'.

[localcanadiancreature62]

IM FUCKING CRYING. THIS IS LITERALLY SO THEM HELPPPP

The murder-love triangle

(Between Horace, O’Pimm and Thurburt) in a nutshell

[tiredandoptimistic]

thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com complete "riddle" questions and answers

When I first started looking through lists of keywords for thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com, I was confused by a bunch of them which, when entered, produced questions which seem completely unrelated to their trigger phrases. I realized that all the prompts are answers to other questions, meaning it's possible to put them in order and create a complete test. I doubt I'm the first to figure this out, but I still think it's super cool, so here's all the questions and how to find their answers!

(Apologies in advance for the photo quality, they're all described in alt text).

First, you enter the code "RIDDLE" to get "WOULD YOU LIKE TO PLAY A GAME?" which to me is proof that Bill at least has decent taste in movies.

Next, you can either type "NO" or "YES," to get either "YOUR LOSS..." or "WHAT"S MCGUCKET'S FAVORITE SODA"

The answer to this question is "MOUNTAIN DON'T," and while I swear I remember reading this someplace, I can't find the actual source.

Once you enter it, you get the question "WHAT'S A MEDIEVAL HOMONYM?"

Which can be found in the Dark Ages pages of The Book of Bill, in the border of the illuminated manuscript:

"LYRE LIAR"

"Anti-Cipher Tonic" appears near the end of the "Anti Cipher Society" pages, complete with an ingredients list:

The twentieth of which is "Harold's Ramblings"

When you enter it you get another question to which I cannot find the source of the answer, but going off the list of phrases that've been found, I'm guessing it's "UNION MADE"

Bill's government file can be found on the page about the 1940s, and is labeled with:

A number which gets you:

Okay and I swear this is the last one I can't show my work on, but wherever you find it the answer is "Grebley Hemberdreck"

A reference to the picture of Bill celebrating the bubonic plague on the Dark Ages page.

And that funky little rodent gives you:

A reference to Thurburt Mudget Waxstaff III of the Anti-Cipher Society and his eventual fate of being institutionalized:

Once you enter his number, you get a question about tracks in the snow:

Which is answered on Ford's missing journal pages about winter in Gravity Falls:

The tinsel snake gets you "THE 6TH OPTION ON BILL'S EDITING SOFTWARE?"

Which can be found on the page where Bill designs a cover for his book:

The sixth option, "Torture Mentally," leads to:

Which is yet another reference to the Dark Ages, and Bill's adventures with the wizard Xgqrthx the Unpronounceable.

Whose name produces:

An address which is provided on the 1990s Tri Angels page, in the mail order form:

Said address takes you to:

To answer this question, you need to do a little more digging around the website. When you enter the code "NAITSUAF," you get a letter from Bill attempting to recruit you into his MLM soul-selling scheme, complete with this note from his lawyer:

And once you enter the name "MULTILEVEL MARK," you get the final question:

(For some reason I haven't figured out, "CAESAR ATBASH VIGENERE" produces the same result as "MULTILEVEL MARK," so that's one way to skip to the end I guess).

Silas Birchtree is referenced in The Book of Bill on the Cults page:

But his full story isn't revealed until you enter "STOD EHT TCENNOC" on the website.

The whole document is definitely a worthwhile read, but there's really only one aspect that's relevant to our purpose:

It was Emmaline Butternubbins who killed Silas Birchtree (again) in 1952! And when you enter her name into the computer, it tells you that you've finally earned a treat. Huzzah!

(Interestingly to me a least, "EMMALINE BUTTERNUBBINS" and "BUTTERNUBBINS" both work as codes, but "EMMALINE" does not. I guess Bill's not on a first name basis with her).

Anyways, once you enter "DISPENSE MY TREAT," a folder is downloaded onto your device which is full of text-free versions of art from The Book of Bill, which you can use for desktop wallpapers or any other nefarious purposes your mind can conceive of.

I hope you've enjoyed going on this journey with me, because I've sure spent an amount of time on it.

[nobodyinparticuler]

Does anyone know if there’s a reason why the news article about the Bill hunters stated before Thurburt Mudget Waxstaff III encountered Bill?

[aria-greenhoodie]

Time stuck au but it’s Pacifica meeting the Anti-Cipher society. And she is becoming Abigale’s apprentice in engineering.

I thought I DELETED THIS ASK but I DIDNT it was just HIDDEN FOR SOME REASON! anyway this idea has captivated me, I have yet to draw Pac with the whole society (I WILL) but here’s some doodles of her and Abbey!!

Click for Quality!

Also some extra musings under the cut…..

The Northwests travel to Illinois one holiday. Pacifica takes some time off from her insufferable parents to find someplace worth visiting. Unfortunately, it seems like nothing in Illinois is worth visiting. She eventually finds herself at 333 North East West Drive, a functionally abandoned historical building, “For Rent” sign collecting dust in its windows. Something catches her eye on the ground - what looks to be a normal tape measurer. I say “looks to be,” because it is in fact a TIME tape-measurer, albeit a half-broken one.

Pacifica ends up in 1901 using the half-broken time tape measurer and manages to break it completely. Luckily for her, Abigale finds her and agrees to help fix it… and teach Pacifica some mechanical know-how in the process!

Abigale doesn’t know that she’s Pacifica’s ancestor. Pacifica is pretty certain Abigale Blackwing is Abigale Northwest, but doesn’t say anything because Abigale Northwest was always considered a bit of a stain on the family, half-buried by history. Pacifica doesn’t want to let Abigale know she’s been erased, and honestly, is still a little bought-in to her family’s philosophy of sweeping “unsavory” people or things under the rug at this point.

Pacifica is actually pretty damn good at mechanics! She takes a second to get a hang of it, but once she grasps the basics she learns the rest shockingly quick. Abigale is so proud.

Pacifica actually helps enable some semblance of workshop-safety in the society, what with her modern knowledge that lead, mercury, and arsenic are all deadly toxins that you shouldn’t be putting in “anti-cipher tonic” to guzzle and/or rub on your skin.

The rest of the society LOVE Pacifica. That’s their collective daughter now.

Jessamine teaches her how to shoot! Pacifica isn’t a very good natural aim, but Jessie is patient and knows skill comes with practice.

Horace is so charmed by her, he really takes up a sort of father figure. He would mow down entire countries for this kid. Pacifica doesn’t know how to take Horace at first, since she’s so used to her real dad sucking ass, but she becomes close with him fast!

Thurburt is SO her silly weird uncle. Thurburt was always a clumsy, accident-prone fool, but somehow around Pacifica he becomes even more slapstickly-inclined. Pacifica thinks he’s doing it on purpose to get a laugh out of her. He is. It always works.

Even O’Pimm, the crotchety old drunk that he is, gets a kick out of her! He likes her honesty. If Pac thinks something’s daft or dull, she’ll say it. O’Pimm is glad to not be the ONLY one with sense around the society anymore.

And of course, it goes without saying that Abigale ADORES Pac. Abigale never wanted to be a mother, but teaching Pacifica the ropes of engineering and working her through her problems made her reconsider that thought.

Pacifica actually manages to fix the time tape measurer all on her own one night. It takes 2 weeks for her to finally tell the society. She almost doesn’t want to leave.

Abigale was the one to convince her to go home. “The future needs you, Pacifica. It needs brilliant, talented girls like you. You’ve got people waiting on you, but more than that, you’ve got a whole WORLD waiting for you! Live your life, Pacifica, your story doesn’t end in this time. Promise me you’ll make some change in that future of yours, rather than feel trapped in the past with us…”

Pacifica is a lot different when she returns. She’s suddenly way into tinkering, something she keeps secret from her family. She’s also a lot happier, and a lot less concerned about mistakes (though she’s more worried when her parents are in eye or earshot…)

Pacifica starts to really get interested in the story of Abigale Northwest. She unearths a lot of hidden secrets about her life. Most of it isn’t good, especially now. At least Pacifica knows the truth, now. (I have a VERY specific idea as to how Abbey’s life was after the society disbanded and it is NOT pretty. When I post it I’ll add a link here)

She wishes Abigale could have had her happy ending. She wonders if she had stayed behind, could she have changed things? She considered using the time tape measurer to go back more times then she’d like to admit. But she made a promise, didn’t she? Her job is here in the future, not stuck in the past…

[aria-greenhoodie]

If the Anti-Bill society has 100 fans I am one of them. If the Anti-Bill society has 1 fan that’s me. If the Anti-Bill society has no fans I’m dead.

Based on this passage from The Book of Bill! ↓

Click for Quality!

[aria-greenhoodie]

So I still can’t stop thinking about the Anti-Bill Society as described in The Book of Bill so…. I drew up designs for them. Unfortunately the only ones we actually see the face of is Mr. Waxstaff and Father O’Pimm, and we only have a handful of photos of the others, but I tried my best to make them make sense!

Click for Quality!

[aria-greenhoodie]

So like don’t judge me on how I’m taking forever reading The Book of Bill but today I just got to the “Anti-Bill Society” part of the book and… why is no one talking about them??? We have an excommunicated alcoholic priest, a giant of a man who seems to have no brain cells, a triggerhappy sharp-shootress who ALSO seems to have no brain cells, and a mad inventress who tests her inventions on herself, all under the leadership of Some Fucking Guy who is cursed to have only the worst possible ideas unless a DEMON TRIANGLE is telling him what to do. These characters are so fascinating and no one talks about them. I wanna come up with designs for them SO BAD. Father Tinsley O'Pimm, Horace Broadshoulder, Jessamine Delilah Gulch, Abigale Blackwing, and of course Thurburt Mudget Waxstaff III, you will live in my head forever.

[aria-greenhoodie]

Okay but if Abigale and Jessamine are together,

Should Horace and Thurburt get together too???

I’ve been shipping them in secret since I first read Thurburt describe Horace as “the largest man (he’s) ever seen” I’ll be for real… I can make anything yaoi✨✨✨

Click for Quality!

[aria-greenhoodie]

Abigale Blackwing/Northwest - The Lost History of a Troubled Inventress

After a curious underground bunker is discovered in the state of [REDACTED], New historical records are published connected to the Northwest family. The bunker and its contents were dated to have originated from some time in the early 1900s. Atop the entrance, an odd, one-eyed triangular skull with crossbones looms over all who enter, the words "Anti-Cipher Society" engraved in the stone below it. There are rumors that a skeleton (albeit one with two eyes and a decidedly non-triangular skull) was found within, clutching a few of the many documents discovered, but authorities refuse to confirm them...

Contained within this document is a transcript of some of the contents regarding a particularly curious individual mentioned heavily throughout the many letters, journals, and other material uncovered; Abigale Blackwing, later known as Abigale Northwest.

WARNING: Transcript may be out of order, and some words may be too illegible to transcribe. These documents are old, after all.

▲ [PSRK PMZI XLI ERXM-GMTLIV WSGMIXC] ▲

READ MORE?

(THATS RIGHT GUYS IM POSTING MY ABIGALE BLACKWING AND ASSORTED ANTI-CIPHER SOCIETY DRABBLE. GO READ IT!!)

[localcanadiancreature62]

Behold,the pathetic copywriter/journalist man. @/aria-greenhoodie Look at him,look at the result of your infection spreading to me.

[localcanadiancreature62]

Not Thurburt being into TWO aloof and gruff men. @aria-greenhoodie @chaseerr0rcode. Also i only made this because chaser's idea of yet ANOTHER love triangle between vintage men set in a time where gay people are hated is sooo funny to me.

[localcanadiancreature62]

Me: I can make normal art. I can draw normal things yes definitely absolutely.

Also me: Draws THIS

@aria-greenhoodie I made them make out uh-

[localcanadiancreature62]

@chaseerr0rcode @aria-greenhoodie Look at my gays. Look at them.

Extra notes on Waxstaff and O'Pimm:

Thurburt is a bottom. His pathetic ass LOVES being under. Heck,he has had fantasies of WOMEN taking charge in the bedroom during his former relationships. He wants to get pegged sooo bad yet he doesn't know the term for when a men gets fucked lmaoo. O'Pimm tops. Something about regaining control of his life after everyone he had ever trusted ruined it (his shitty father, adoptive architect dad/boss,Bill,etc),also 'cause he wants to see Thurburt being even MORE pathetic. PERSONALITIES

Waxstaff - Bro is deadass just Shermie/Dipper. With him being pacifistic and chill and nice but also anxious insecure distrustful as well as desperate to become something else than just "the factory head's son". He's like if Dipper was more insecure and if Shermie was nicer without the sass. However he also isn't a pushover and one of the main reasons why he hates Bill is cuz he's fueled by spite,like i mean,getting mad cuz a demon guy gave him nightmares instead of the triangle giving him his journalism fame sounds pretty spiteful to me. Thurbert is the embodiment of "do no harm but take no shit". He's a nice guy,but even nice guys can become mean (worse than mean actually. downright asshole behavior) if they're pushed too far. Waxstaff may not have O'Pimm's spiritual knowledge,or Abigale's genius,or Horace's strength,but he is driven by sheer will and determination as well as ambition to get what he wants. Even if that means coupling with an insane gaggle of odd fellows that are probably all wanted for murder (Abigale Horace and Jessamine) with only one man among the group actually being sane enough to be of help (O'Pimm). He will kill that triangle and eventually get the glory he believes he deserves one day,no matter the costs (set pre society reveal to the public. oh thurbert,if you only knew).

O'Pimm - Husk. This man is literally Husk hazbin hotel,but not quite. Grumpy, apathetic,only cares about things if he gets to drink,swears a lot despite being a holy man,etc. Except unlike Husk,he has different reasons for acting like this. Instead of being grizzled by war and being a deadbeat gambler and a washed up overlord,his behavior is a result of being a product of child abuse and literally having to live on the streets at fucking 16 after his dad sold him to an architect guy who also fired him. He had it good for a while with a lovely wife a priest job and everything but like all good things,this had to end (for more trauma ✨). He's now tired and weary,he doesn't give a shit anymore as his only reasons for living are killing Bill and drinking. Priest man is going through it.