#This post would make sense to my one beloved mutual only and really that is what truly matters

[empty-blog-for-lurking]

I think it is genuinely really funny that of all the Lance's from my different aus, the most chill one out of all of them is the one who got violently murdered and came back as an unperceivable eldritch horror whose first act after coming back was vengence on the guy who killed him and then steal his house.

[linka-from-captain-planet]

Florrickology, Part 4: Florrick, Wyll, Ulder, and Character Assassination

We all know it, we all hate it. They did my beloved dirty, used her to shit all over Wyll's quest at what should be a climactic moment, and I will never forgive never forget it.

In Act 3, if Wyll rejects Mizora's offer to rescue his father from the Iron Throne in favor of keeping his pact broken, Florrick will ambush the party, inform them that "Lady Mizora" told her what he did, and seek retribution unless talked down.

This is stupid, makes no sense, assassinates Florrick's character for no good reason, and represents some of Larian's laziest NPC writing--unsurprisingly, in the midst of Wyll's personal quest, and smack dab in what's supposed to be the climax of one of the longest quests in the game.

As I said in previous posts, Florrick being willing to go to the mat for Ulder any day or time of the week is consistent with her other characterization.

Up to the point of this confrontation, the player has observed that she'll follow Ulder to literal hell and back, chase him across half a continent, and become so disappointed in her perceived failure to save him and, by extension, the entire city, that she completely gives up and quietly awaits execution, without even trying to escape (which she probably could do, as a level 11, probably Enchantment School wizard).

All her voice lines and all the things others say about her paint the picture of a loyal and true-blue friend, and a public servant of the highest caliber, "as steady as Tyr's heartbeat" and "as upstanding as the Sword Mountains." She may be sharp and shrewd, and perhaps a bit domineering and curt, but she's not cruel. She may be a bit cavalier, but she's never rash.

She's not stupid. She may be more emotional than she seems.

She has killed someone before, on the spot, for coming after Ulder. It's consistent that she would do it again, even if she had to hunt them down this time and risk being caught by the Steel Watch. In her mind, she has nothing left to lose.

What is not consistent is her being willing to kill Wyll on a flimsy accusation (that she doesn't even really believe if you read her thoughts).

Now as I've mentioned, Florrick doesn't seem to feel any particular way about Wyll; she seems to regard him simply as her friend and boss' son, just a good kid she patted on the head at parades, and when they meet again in Waukeen's Rest, as a valuable asset in rescuing Ulder and saving the city.

And I like this! It highlights that Ulder was Wyll's entire world, and it was Ulder, alone, who failed him and cast him aside. I think this is also part of why there's never any indication that Florrick and Ulder are/were romantically involved, because this would change the expectations for how she treats/feels about Wyll. But as it stands, simply being a woman in the vicinity of a child, even one in need, didn't obligate her to be a mother.

And this the feeling is mutual. In-game, there's also no indication that Wyll had or desired had any sort of personal relationship with her, as he talks about her accomplishments but not, say, seeking her out for advice or spending time with her. He mentions crushing on Stellmayne, but when asked about Florrick, he goes right to "yeah she fucks, she sniped a guy right in front of me once." He only regards her in relation to his father and the city, never himself. She's his dad's confidant and advisor, and an exemplary public servant, but nothing in particular to him.

So, it's not how Florrick feels about Wyll that makes it out of character for her to attack him, but because of how she knows Ulder feels about Wyll.

She says herself, when talked down in that confrontation, that Ulder wanted her to find Wyll and pass his birthright on if he fell, because as many mistakes as Ulder made, and as wrong as he was, and as unacceptable as his behavior was, in the end, he trusted his boy with the fate of his beloved city.

So, Florrick would never betray Ulder by attacking his son, without irrefutable evidence, especially when she'd been told explicitly to trust and help Wyll by the person she respects and reveres the most in the entire world.

As one of the most prominent NPCs in the game, appearing with a fairly significant role in all three acts, and who's been demonstrated to be an unquestionable heroic figure all along, Florrick deserved better than what she got in this blatantly lazy, formulaic scene.

And that's the answer to the question of 'why is this scene so bad?' - lazy, formulaic writing.

That's also probably the answer to any 'why is this Act 3 moment and/or NPC interaction so clunky?' question. This confrontation is Like That because it's how every every NPC Confrontation is: someone is willing to kill you for variably logical reasons, unless you talk your way out of it, and the end result is only nominally different, so it was pointless from the jump. It's the illusion of drama and conflict and a plot twist, not real drama and conflict and plot twist. Of course she (andWyllcoughcough) isn't safe from the "uh oh this game isn't done but we're shipping it anyway so we better make this story beat messy, both under-and over-whelming, and confusing to match the overall tone of Act 3" curse.

So you might then move on to, "okay, well, what's the in-universe explanation for this? How can we make it make sense, considering what we know about Florrick?"

I won't give them credit for implying anything they didn't bother to imply, even though they could have gone several other routes with about 2 lines of better dialogue and a simple animation. So, I think the only true, canonical reason Florrick does this is exactly what's presented in the text. She was approached by "Lady" Mizora, a stranger, told a lie, only half-believed it, slapped a fuckass hood on over her very distinctive freakum dress, went on the hunt, and ambushed the party in front of like 50 human, 5 cat, and 3 Steel Watch witnesses even though she's a fugitive marked for execution.

That's it. There's no further context. Again, nothing implied. As you can tell by this entire series, I will read into anything, and there's simply nothing to read into here.

No indication that Mizora charmed or is controlling Florrick, a simple explanation that could have been easily been introduced with about 1 line, a special effect, and a mocap of her "snapping out of it."

No revelation that "Lady" Mizora has been posing as a patriar and pulling strings in Baldur's Gate for the last seven years, working closely with and maybe kissin haha jk... unless Florrick, making it perfectly reasonable why she'd believe Mizora over Wyll, who's been not only missing BUT cavorting with devils for those same seven years, which is ironic because Florrick had unknowingly been doing the same thing (juicy!). (more thoughts on this)

There's not even really a feeling that Florrick, who again did all that mentioned above for Ulder and her city, is simply just so heartbroken and grieving and demoralized that she's experiencing a mental breakdown and a critical lapse in judgement, grasping at anything to make it make sense or to make her feel in control again, even if she has her doubts deep down. Again, this could have easily been written in with a few lines and some body language. I feel like this is what they thought they did, but the fact is they didn't even though it would have been easy and cost basically 0 extra resources or time.

Clearly, this scene got rubber-stamped because they (painfully correctly) assumed that nobody would care about Wyll's storyline at this point, and his supporting character Florrick with it. They probably just figured that we'd all forget how wack it was when we continued the quest and got gagged by the Emporer being a gay dragon-fucker and also Balduran.

So, what would have made this scene/part of the quest better?

To be clear, better is a pretty low bar as the canonical version full-on sucks. The above suggestions are only what could have made this specific scene (Florrick Confronts Wyll About Killing His Father) better. But really, Wyll's quest, as we all know, needs an overhaul. So, below is what's overall needed to make Wyll's entire quest in Act 3 better.

maintain Florrick's characterization (this post is about Florrick after all)

give Wyll a chance to be a hero in his own story

actually utilize Mizora, who's truly been pretty pointless all this time

provide a sense of stakes--it has to matter what happens

get everything the fuck away from that fucking magic show

I had a whole alternative Act 3 storyline written to suggest, Boss Fight Mizora Avernus and all, but realized just before posting that it doesn't work because it ends with Wyll destroying his pact, and he does sort of need that to remain a warlock for the endgame (being forced to re-class at the 11th hour would be a bit of a bold move). But trust me it was cool and better than what we got.

[electronicclowncollector]

STINGUE ESSAY

(Credit to @lilacharbour for providing me with the screenshots for evidence)

(^Yours (and your cat’s) reaction to seeing this post)

That’s right, in this essay, I will be persuading you, and any of the doubters out there, that the ship stingue is undeniably canon, and not the sort of canon you can just headcanon away. I will present several pieces of evidence with my vast knowledge of the Fairy Tail franchise (really vast) that can completely prove that stingue is a real ship (also known as Ring, stogue, the sabretooth boys, strong, but for the sake of keeping track of it, I’ll use the most obscure name for it, stingue). P.S. if you haven’t read my Rogue post, go do it, this won’t make any sense without a firm understanding of my analysis of Rogue’s character, and it's way shorter than this so there’s no reason not to.

Exhibit A: In this manga panel, we can see that sting is wearing a cat outfit. Many of the doubters would dismiss this, saying that this was all a part of his character development in the Saber Tooth arc, where he *Allegedly* wanted to become true to his guild name and become a sabretooth tiger (with cool dragon powers). I propose a different idea. He was doing this to impress Rogue. We all know the entire Fairy Tail franchise loves cats, it’s common knowledge, if you didn’t know that then you did inadequate research in preparation for this essay. But what makes this specific to rogue is that he’s wearing a cat COSTUME. NOT CAT EARS. NOT A CAT TAIL. AN ENTIRE COSTUME. You know who else is a cool cat in costume?!?!? THAT’S RIGHT, FRESH! ROGUES CAT. CLEARLY, sting was doing this in a bid to replace Rogue’s beloved cat Fresh, and you can CLEARLY SEE Rogue blushing, however, the blushing is only in the colored version of the director cut of the manga, and its top secret (only I have a copy), so you’ll have to trust the experts on this one. Also is the girl on the right single? If so, send her my way.

I’m sure the manga readers In the crowd are reacting just like Sting and Rogue did in exhibit B. But OP, I hear you ask, what about the anime only viewers? They won’t have this part of the manga adapted for years! And I must say, what an astute observation, I completely respect your question and you have earned a red heart, you can redeem it at the bottom of the post, or if you want to pass it to a friend press the two arrows button next to it to recycle the heart. ANYWAY, this shot here, was taken directly from the seen during the the raids on the beaches of Akane, when both Sting and Rogue had been caught in a quicksand trap by the SINISTER Bickslow. Where does Stingue apply to this? You may ask. Well, just outside the frame, we can’t see (but we know its true) that everyone is running around them to get ahead, because even the background characters like Natsu and Gajeel (may the dragons bless his sacrifice for the sins of fairy tail) know that they are romantically involved, but the scene cuts to black to see fresh teaming up with stings cat whatever its name (Bradley or doug or something) to save them, but off screen, they literally reach out and HOLD HANDS in the scene. THEY THOUGHT THEY WOULD DIE but their only thoughts were their mutual love for eachother. If that story didn’t make you cry, then I don’t know what did.

But OP I hear some of you asking, if they’re in a relationship, WHY havent they been openly talking about the more intimate side of their relationship? First of all, go reread the manga, second of all, this point is for you. Read Exibit C. Now, I’m sure this doesn’t need any explanation, it’s a completely self-explanatory point. But for some It is necessary, and I shall provide. These two were getting very lovey dovey during a date together, they were going on a walk in the forest and oh my, a river, and how did they get across? Stepping stones! The reason why it says a “Person stepping contest” rather than a “Stepping stones constest” is because of a translation error, no need to elaborate further. Another point to be made, more specific to this panel, is the character in the background, that very few people noticed on their first few reads, is Gandalf! Now, I’ll give you a chance to pick up your phone/ipad/PC/book after you all dropped it in shock, because that’s a lot to take in. But how does it relate to the ship? Well, Gandalf is a very close word to Gander, the word for an adult male goose, which in fairy tail culture is an animal associated with passion and romance, so Gandalfs presence obviously correlates with that. He has appeared in every single manga panel with rogue and sting in the background, further proof that they have a romantic, passionate relationship.

My next point relates to the games, which I have played time and time again just for this one cutscene. During the Mt. Hakobe chapter, the two were forced to travel up the mountain to obtain the fabled dragonberry from the mountain, in order to save Rogues adoptive mother/auntie dragon. The following dialogue ensued, starting with rogue: “Heya fresh, do you think you could pass me the beans? They’re in the backpack” (fresh was in rogues backpack at the time), fresh responded with a mix between a meow and a ribbet, and sting responded with the following: “Hahah, not more beans! It’ll stink both of our sleeping bags up for when we’re cuddled up in the tent!”. Rogue proceeded to blush and a quick time event occurred. Their obvious lovers banter shows more then enough to prove that in the games, both characters are incredibly infatuated with eachother, because as Dr Seuss (with help from me) said: “You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because” “Rogue keeps eating all the beans before sleeping”.

Now my final point in this essay is how syncronised they are. Besides the obvious romantic tension when they do their special move where their massive balls touch (obvious gay symbolism), they’re also syncronised in many other things. Most notably, finishing eachothers sentences, read exhibit D. The example above shows this, where Sting says “Ah!!!” and Rogue finishes it off by saying “!!”, a reference to Stings famous catchphrase, “Ah!!!!!”, but this time rogue added on the last 2 exclamation marks, showing a clear understanding of eachothers speech patterns and mannerisms.

In conclusion, Sting and Rogue are the love of eachothers life, which has been clearly seen throughout the Manga, Anime and Game (s)(?) If you have yet to be convinced by this essay, then I thoroughly recommend you to reread the essay if you aren’t. but if you have been convinced, congratulations, you are officially a stingue shipper, welcome to the club, no, the family. I myself am an honorary member of  the fairy tail community, according to a friend of mine, so I’m qualified to tell you that you will fit right in.

(There was another point to be made about some random person drawing art of the two of them looking at eachothers balls and blushing, but they were mere amateurs without proper understanding of fairy tail as a franchise, so I left it out.)

[wineanddineloseyourmind]

Hi this is my kinky hornyposting sideblog 😇 (main is @existentialsquid)

This is an 18+ only space. Minors DNI.

This is a pro-kink, pro-trans, anti-capitalist, anti-imperialist space. Bigots, transphobes, conservatives, and zionists DNI. Also, die!!!!

This is a place for me to explore all my kinks, including the dark ones. Continue with this in mind.

If you want to DM me, please read my whole pinned!

Anyway, about me:

Call me Di and use my pronouns (she/they/it) and you will be spared. You may also call me any feminine term of endearment if we’re mutuals 💖 (i love pet names so i will probably end up calling you “darling” and/or "babe" if i take a liking to you 😇)

I am a vers switch but my "default" is dom top, although that can change very quickly in the right situation :3

Other than kink, I enjoy TTRPGs, Fromsoftware games (Dark Souls, Bloodborne, Elden Ring, etc.), animated media and nerd shit like that. Also, if you have miniatures or models you built/painted, I want to see them!

I’m polyam and in an open relationship with my boyfriend @bearded-protagonist-enthusiast, but I’m not really looking for a new romantic relationship right now. I’m totally up for friendship and sexting with mutuals though! 🥰

i am here to make friends, explore kink, flirt with mutuals, and post about:

T4T

and

uneven power dynamics (sometimes involving primal predator/prey dynamics, praise, worship, playful degradation (as degrader), petplay, or dubcon (CNC, intox, etc.))

and

breeding/oviposition (also lactation)

and

monsterfucking (of nearly all kinds)

and

transformation/corruption (usually overlapping with monsterfucking stuff)

and

gore (blood, eroticised cannibalism, etc.)

(Note: there will be no real snuff, only occasional art and smut, as well as me just talking about gory fantasies)

and

unsanitary (musk and blood only)

Also, obligatory: I have a bit of an oral fixation so there will be talk of biting - if I ever mention “breaking the skin” with a bite, please know that it is purely in a fantasy sense! Drawing blood with your teeth is very dangerous IRL due to risk of infection. Buuuut it’s pretty sexy in fantasy though, so I will talk about it in that sense. Stay safe out there!

I also like unambiguously consensual stuff with human characters who stay the same, but the above are my kinks so they’ll show up frequently on this blog :)

If you don’t like any of those kinks, you have my blessing to never interact with me ever and live blissfully unaware of my existence. This is a pro-kink space.

On that note, there are some kinks I’m not into and would prefer not to be brought to this blog by replies or asks or what-have-you. No offence intended to anyone with these kinks, but these are my hard lines:

Being preyed on (I can get subby as hell but I draw the line at being treated like a prey animal 🙅‍♀️ I’m not a little rabbit or a deer or a puppy that gets hunted, the idea of me being that is not sexy to me)

Piss

Scat

Raceplay

My soft lines (i.e. things I might be comfortable with if done with someone I trust and can discuss them with) are:

Being degraded (generally I prefer being the one degrading, but in select situations I can be into being degraded)

Choking (I might find it sexy in fantasy on occasion, but I would never ever do it IRL because of the inherent health risks. For that reason, it can be a turn-off sometimes.)

Incest/fauxcest (I don’t always love all versions of this kink, but I’m open to discussing specific fantasies if I have a chance to say “actually, no thanks” before we start anything. You can call me mommy as a title if you’re one of my beloved mutuals 😇)

Detransition (I would never want this for myself but if someone wants to RP as their AGAB then I can be into that~)

The above is not a DNI list. You can still interact with this blog if you have any/all of the above kinks, just don’t bring anything on the hard lines list into my replies, reblogs, asks, or DMs. If you’re interested in something on the soft lines list please keep my boundaries in mind.

On the subject of interaction, i would love to see anon asks related to:

monsterfucking concepts

T4T flirting 🥰

True/False game (make an assumption about me and I’ll say if it’s true or false)

NSFW ask game

Kink Rating ask game

Fifty Shades of Blue ask game

NSFT Emoji ask game

Telling me you just masturbated to my blog/pics 😇

If you want to sext/RP with me, please:

Send me an ask or two first to break the ice

Chat with me for a bit

Pitch the scene you want to RP and/or ask if I’m in the mood first

ok thanks enjoy

ANON ASKS: OPEN

DMs: OPEN (MUTUALS ONLY)

My tags:

#me (whatever reminds me of myself)

#beloved volus (posts relating to my partner @bearded-protagonist-enthusiast)

#personal post (stuff that’s more about me than anything)

#my fiction (my short stories and smut)

#transition goals (what i’d want to look like in an ideal world)

#need (general horny thoughts)

#i can be trusted around cute boys (subby boy tag)

#i bite (this one is self-explanatory)

#i am looking (real people selfies and nudes)

#tf kink (content relating to fantasy transformation)

#monsterfucker (monster stuff)

#my asks + #my answers (self-explanatory)

mutal tags: #beloved volus (@bearded-protagonist-enthusiast) #kittendeer (@pupsferalkid) #misc (@miscling) #🐊 (@crocofsouls) #gothy kitten (@gothykitten16) #dommy demon (@serotoninswitch) #elf mutual (@mira-mira-0n-the-wall) #dungeon essie (@beansira) #baz (@hyenabrainedpup) and probably more when i get round to it lol

[farewellneverland2004]

Being a reincarnation sucks! and UWMA told us, but we were too happy for DeanPharm to listen!

Okay! This might be a little bit of a hot take, and also possibly a little theorizing. But I will stand my ground and die on this hill!

UWMA is my all-time favorite BL, and might I even say, one of my favorite web dramas ever!

It's a compelling, heartbreaking, beautiful story about a wonderfully healthy relationship between two very traumatized people. Finding each other, and in the process, reconnecting the tortured souls of two people who loved each other but weren't given the option to be happy together.

Now, though that scenario is not likely to happen to me or you, it's still an interesting story, using the soulmate trope to its ultimate advantage. I love the idea of a healthy, yet unconditional and unending love that prevails through all.

However, although I love the reincarnated love trope, there is a blatant fact that I, and many other UWMA fans have been oblivious to. and that is how much it would SUCK to be in our beloved Dean and Pharm's shoes!

What invoked me to make this post?

Well, it's plain and simple. I'm sick of all the complaining and making fun of My boy Pharm for being a cryer!

Am I biased because Pharm is my favorite character and I relate to the inability to stop myself from crying and it usually takes a while for me to stop, so I see a lot of myself in him? Maybe, but that's not important!

What's important is that I believe, people who complain or laugh at Pharm for this know that this is a response to PTSD, but don't take time to really acknowledge how bad this PTSD would be if you were faced with it in real life. This is why I want to shed light on how being the reincarnations of Korn and In have done little to nothing beneficial for Dean and Pharm, other than the fact it's what brought them together.

(But just an FYI, crying is a normal reaction to things, and maybe Pharm is just a very emotional and expressive softy and there is nothing wrong with that! MEN SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO CRY GODDAMNIT!)

Well, since I just ranted about the Pharm crying disrespect, might as well start with him and his respected past life counterpart, Intouch!

As we see all through UWMA, Pharm probably has the more blatant PTSD from his past life out of the couple, and it makes sense.

In was left to watch the man he loved take his own life in front of him. He was the one to witness his improvement, his confession, and his mutual decline until he had nothing left to say but "I love you" and "I'm Sorry", and in the end, he was still left alone. he is left cradling the body of not only the first man he probably ever openly loved but also the first person who he could actually relate to in a world that told him if he wanted to survive, he had to hide who he was.

This user makes an interesting point on how Korn dying isn't just a traumatizing event for In, but in his mind, also an act of betrayal. Because he promised him, yet he traumatized and left him alone in a world that would hate him for who he is.(in Intouch's mind ofc). Yet he also knows that though he is hurt, all he wants is to be with Korn, so he commits suicide to escape the life he'd have to live without him.

These very hard-hitting and intense feelings are already bad to live with for the one who actually experienced the trauma firsthand. But imagine, being a normal kid with a happy loving family, yet you are plagued by vague but traumatic memories that are not your own? you wake up crying every morning, you panic at any unsuspected loud noise, and you get seemingly random panic attacks that you can't even explain why they happen.

You seemingly have no valid reason to act this way. You want to stop, or at least to know why, but can't for the life of you understand. I think many people can understand the feeling of being depressed, angry, anxious, etc., and don't really know why. So they feel guilty and exhausted from these strong emotions they don't want or understand.

For Pharm, the more he learns about his situation, the more he's around Dean, and the more he learns about Korn and In, the more intense his episodes get. he has more nightmares, more flashbacks, and he's less able to discern In's emotions and pain from his own.

At one point, he even realizes that the more he finds out about In, the more power In's feelings of betrayal and anguish have on him. He ultimately decides he doesn't want to know how In died, believing what's done is done and it's best to leave it in the past, just for him to find out later and for all his efforts to stay himself to be diminished by In's immense grief.

He straight up almost DIES because In's soul can't distinguish Dean from Korn, and therefore Pharm from Intouch. And people still thinks he doesn't deserve to cry all he wants?

Moving onto the titular man that, for lack of a better phrase, "started it all", and his green-flag of a reincarnation! Dean and Korn.

(If you don't agree with the dean, green-flag statement, I respectfully disregard your opinion)

So... let's just get this out in the open. I believe Korn was always suicidal. Or at least, very depressed.

Now when I say that, I obviously can't know how his childhood went or when his mental health began to decline, but considering the family he was born into, and the time he was in when he realized he liked men, it's not too hard to suspect that these feelings have been festering for a while.

Korn was the eldest son of a mafia loan shark. We don't ever find out about his mother, whether she was around or not, but considering how his father treats him and his children, I can assume that even if she was in their life, his father would still be calling all the shots.

We know that Korn is expected to carry on the family business, and at the point of his life where we are introduced to him, we see his father is beginning to put even more pressure on him to start taking up jobs and practicing to take over when he's gone.

But we see that Korn doesn't want to take over. He doesn't want to hurt people and he just wants a normal life for his brothers and himself. However, due to familial obligation, and threats from his father, Korn is submitting himself to a life he hates for the sake of his brothers, so neither of them has to throw their lives away for their father's business.

At this point, the existence of Korn is miserable. He's being pressured to do something he desperately hates, to submit himself to a life he does not want. He's ostracized at university for his affiliation with loan sharks and his general anti-social demeanor(which is definitely a coping mechanism) He's being berated and called useless by his own dad, which would definitely hurt his view of himself. He cares about his brothers way too much to ever let them know how much he's hurting, isolating himself from their care. finally, his sexuality would make him a target for discrimination, so he's forced to hide more about himself until he's probably forced into a marriage with a person he does not love, producing an heir to take on the job he hates and officially restarting the generational trauma and cycle of abuse.

This person better explains what Korn was going through mentally and what In truly meant to him than I ever could. But basically, they say that before In, Korn had practically dug himself a hole he couldn't get out of, and he was living on autopilot. Just moving through the days, until the day would come when he couldn't take it anymore. I very much agree with this. and every flashback, when they get closer and closer to the day, you can see that he doesn't know how much longer he's gonna last. So now that he is at the point of hopelessness, all he can do is let him know he loves him, and apologize to him and their dads for making them witness what he was going to do, but also for leaving him.

Now, I see a lot of comments about how Korn was being selfish with taking his life, because not only did he do it in front of the person he loves, but also in the process, he left him alone in the world. I personally feel like these comments tend to push a little too much on Korn being selfish that it ends up almost coming off as victim blaming. And I want to make it perfectly clear, people who commit suicide do so (mainly) as a last resort. almost no one who is going through with committing the act is doing so out of spite or to hurt others. They do so because they believe there is no other way to escape or fix what's wrong in their life. Korn is no exception. He was in pain, and he needed help, but he believed there was nothing that could be done, and probably felt if he was out of the picture, he would no longer be a burden on In and he would finally put an end to all the war and suffering in his heart and in his life.

However, suicide is an act that at the end of the day hurts everyone the victim is close to. people who are affected by a loved one taking their own life can feel a piling number of emotions. Confusion, anger, guilt, etc. We see those emotions expressed in In, An(In's Sister), Korn's brothers, their dads, and even Pharm. These emotions are valid and it's a common response. So I won't blame the audience for empathizing with In more than Korn in this series. To be fair, even Dean holds resentment towards Korn once he finds out.

Which brings me to why it'd suck to be Dean. He's possessed by the soul of a very depressed and broken man with anti-social tendencies. He's having issues similar to Pharm where he has memories that are not his own, not to mention he's always preoccupied with looking for someone he has no idea may or may not exist. He also chooses to isolate himself from his parents and siblings for the sake of his paternal grandmother, making his relationship with them more strained once he has to be in their lives. (which may or may not be influenced by Korn due to his tendency in life to self-isolate.) He puts on a stern and responsible act for everyone to mask his social awkwardness, still looking for someone he does not know.

And when he finally feels happy and relieved because he's found the thing he's always felt was missing, it only gives him more questions of who those memories actually are, and what he and Pharm have to do with it. The more he finds out, the more his true anxieties begin to take over and he desperately tries to put on a brave face for his boyfriend because he knows Pharm is already going through a lot, and he wants to make sure he's not worried.

When he actually finds out who Korn and In were, and What Korn did, he immediately starts cursing Korn for what happened. But it's so much more than just him being hateful towards a man who took his own life. Because to him, whether he likes it or not, Korn is an aspect of him. Whatever Korn feels, he feels. Korn's actions are his actions. So whatever Korn did, Dean is responsible for.(at least in his mind)

So Dean is practically cursing himself, calling himself a bastard. to Dean, He's the reason Pharm is terrified whenever there is a loud unexpected noise, he's the reason Pharm has panic attacks, and he's the reason Pharm cries in his sleep. He thinks it's his fault that Pharm was so scared of being in a relationship with him, Not to mention he's probably dealing with Korn's soul feeling the same amount of self-loathing. To Korn, everything is his fault, and because of his actions, he abandoned, hurt, and killed the one person that made him keep going.

So now, Dean is left with double self-loathing, and blaming himself for things that were most definitely NOT his fault.

Now, onto my final point on what the worst part of being the reincarnations of two unresting souls. Which is the lack of being your own person. When your body is holding two separate souls constantly fluctuating on taking the wheel, don't be surprised if you feel just a tad bit unsure of who you are or what things in life are your own.

Now, there are some things that their past life events influence that are not bad and are in fact quite sweet. like how In always wanted to be good at cooking, and so Pharm is born with a mother who is great at cooking, and in the process learns to be a good cook. Or Korn going to the beach for the first time with In being one of his happiest memories, and so Dean grows to love the beach, and therefore swimming. But the main thing that this drama shows as its conflict through the series is both Dean and Pharm trying to stay themselves. To have their actions be their own. and also, when the whole reason they are reincarnations of these two men specifically is to reconnect them and fulfill a promise made long ago, there's also the conflict of how much of their love is genuinely theirs. That's probably the worst anxiety in the world! You finally find a person who can truly relate and understand what you're going through and you feel an intense unexplainable love for them, only for you to fear that the relationship you built together isn't based off of love that is yours. It makes you fear that you are hurting the other person because why would you stay with someone if you're not sure if you love them? This is something they both have to face in the final episode. They separate for a little bit to give themselves time to reflect on their own feelings and only after they know that the souls of In and Korn are content, do they know that the love they have is real and it's theirs.

So...Still think reincarnation is cute and fun?! There's a reason people work to finally escape Samsara! Thank you for coming to my rant lol!

[biblicallyaccuratepigeons]

Welcome, traveller

Seraph-Chim's the name; being only vaguely strange is my game.

At first, I didn't think there was really much else to know before looking through my blog. I'm generally an open book; I figured my posts and reblogs would speak for themselves about who I am.

However, after a few months of really being active on this site, it seems that I was wrong.

Here are the most crucial parts about myself:

Sexuality: honestly it's complicated. I've been sexually and romantically attracted to people of many genders, so normally I'd count this as bisexual, but I'm also sex-repulsed. That's right folks, you heard it here first! There is such a thing as a sex-repulsed allosexual, and you've had the great fortune of stumbling across one of our blogs!

Gender identity: This is another complicated one. I've had a bit of a journey reaching this conclusion, which you can check out in my #about gender posts (as of now, there may be a couple missing! am currently in the painstakingly slow process of organizing this blog ;v;), but the long and short of it is that I'm simultaneously every gender and nothing at all. As such, anyone is free to use any gendered or non-gendered terms which feel the most accurate at the time (or are the funniest in context >:}). I do use it/its as well, often in the first person; regarding neos, my favorite ones are ci/cim/cir or ki/kem/ker, but again, just say whatever feels accurate.

Kintypes: I'm an angel and a stormkin! This is also... say it with me now... complicated. Being an angel is easy to explain: humans, like angels, are spiritual creatures which take a variety of forms and have a variety of strengths, who may or may not choose to devote themselves to a higher being or goal. It's a little bit difficult for me to summarize for someone who doesn't already have some kind of framework for it, but basically you can think of my soul as being a different shape from other humans', which is why I describe myself as an angel/angelkin. I've been an angel for my whole life. Being stormkin is a little different for me; it's less that I am a storm and more that storms and wind are my family. I was adopted, or perhaps adopted myself to them, a few years ago, but we've always been good friends.

Fandoms: This and that, but lately? Mostly Gravity Falls; and I'm a Billford shipper. This doesn't mean that I think their relationship is or ever was healthy or ideal. It means that I recognize the spark, the passion, the compatibility, and I love seeing them interact in any context.

And now, the scary part.

I'm a Christian. I love being a Christian, more than I love any of the things I've mentioned about myself, because I love my god. I love Him more than anyone or anything else. He saved my life over and over despite who I was and am, because He's just that kinda guy and He's powerful enough to do it.

However, I know that saying all of that doesn't mean much in this world; certainly, on tumblr dot com, it's more likely to get me blocked or ignored than much else. I'm incredibly fortunate that my first mutual here, now a much beloved friend, was someone who understood me as myself without jumping to any conclusions because of my faith.

So here's a brief summary of where I stand, morally and philosophically, about all of the above statements.

Sexuality: Love is love, affection is affection, attraction is attraction. God gave us feelings in order to make sense of and make the most of this world He's made; all the good He's put into it, and all the bad that's come into it. Feelings are not only a proof of who we are, but also an instrument by which we thrive. Feelings are a morally good thing. I am of the belief that they don't have to define or control us. In much the same way we must train ourselves not to lose our tempers, the life I have chosen also begs me not to lose my head over any individual, regardless of sex. I can love whomever I choose, and I can spend my life with whomever I choose, but I will not allow myself to have sex with anyone I'm not married to, and I will not allow myself to marry more than one person of the opposite sex from myself. As for my sex-repulsion, that is a byproduct of past trauma, which I will not go into detail about here. It's something I live with, and which causes me to hate myself, so of course it's not ideal; on the other hand, feelings are a handy tool, yes? I've chosen to hold onto it, and together, God and I are slowly molding it into something healthier and less self-destructive.

Gender identity: Really, I'm just me. God made me who I am, and if that means a soul that doesn't look like the body it's tied to, so what? He loves variety, sue Him. For the sake of the people around me, I've talked with Him at length, and we've come to a deal: I'll get gender-affirming surgery when I'm 50. Till then, I can express my gender in any way I please, so long as this precious vessel goes relatively undamaged as a result. If this is how I view myself, who am I to tell anyone else what their soul looks like? I do believe in practicing discernment, of course–someone who's grown up in a home heavily biased against a certain gender, for instance, is likely to lean away from expression of that gender for emotional survival, given the choice; and a repeated sex offender is, of course, going to tell any lie that may keep them out of trouble–but generally? Until you can prove yourself wrong, I'll take your words at face value. (In this vein, I do think that our society has lost hold of what being a Man or a Woman means, aside from the false dichotomy of gender itself. Perhaps all this genderfuckery is our way of searching for it? Certainly, I hope to someday understand it.)

Kintypes: Similar to gender, who cares if my soul doesn't look like other human souls? Being an angel in the way that I am isn't so uncommon amongst Christians as one might think, and being close with the wind and rain just means God has given me yet another way to listen to His voice and worship Him. Believing in God, and believing that He's good, of course I believe in an Enemy, a demonic source of evil; but unless a demon talks to me, what can I know of its nature? Being otherkin, alterhuman, non-human, or therian doesn't automatically point to demonization, in my opinion. I have seen a great number of angels who believe that this life is a punishment or proof of abandonment from God, and that is a lie, but the being is not necessarily. As for godkins, I have no reason not to believe you, either. My god already calls humans "little gods," and all spiritual creatures, god or not, are called "elohim." If you say your soul is more elohim-shaped in a godly way than mine or other humans, why should I not believe you? If you have old memories, or muted abilities and affinities, what difference does it make to me? We're cousins, you and I, in a way we can never be with other kintypes.

Fandoms: Fantasy, obviously, is a fiction. Humans share stories that mean something to us, it's what we were made to do, so there's nothing wrong with it.

Religion: I have placed my belief in one God, the Father Almighty, Creator of heaven and earth, of all things visible and invisible; and in one Lord, Jesus Christ, Son of God, the only-begotten, born of the Father before all ages. Light from light, true God from true God, begotten, not made, one in essence with the Father; through Him all things were made. For us and for our salvation, He came down from heaven and was incarnate by the Holy Spirit and the Virgin Mary, and became man. He was crucified by Pontius Pilate, and suffered and was buried. He rose on the third day according to the scriptures. He ascended into heaven and is seated at the right hand of the Father, and He is coming again in glory to judge the living and the dead, and His kingdom will have no end. And I believe in the Holy Spirit, the Lord, the Creator of Life, who proceeds from the Father. Together with the Father and the Son, He is worshipped and glorified; He spoke through the prophets. I believe in one, holy, catholic and apostolic Church. I have been baptized by the Holy Spirit for the remission of sin, and as a public sacrament for the denouncing of it. I wait here, eagerly and expectantly, for the resurrection of the dead among you and of those of my brethren who have passed on, and for the life of the world to come. This does not mean that I dismiss other gods nor the various magics as fairy tales; only that, by nature, I am opposed to those powers which would keep us all from the one God with enough love and power to anoint Himself with His own wrath in order to defeat the spiritual death into which we are born by inheritance, and someday soon, to kill death altogether.

If you've read this far, thank you for your time! Know that I love you, and that I'm able to because my god decided that we each were worth something more than mere dust.

🥔

[cosmic-metanoia]

The Final Fantasy Book & Why It Was Written

**Warning - Spoilers for Final Fantasy XVI***

There is something that is breaking my heart and I MUST post about it! Let me preface this by saying I adore Joshua and Clive and I want BOTH to be alive at the game’s ending. I saw someone posted on Reddit towards the earlier part of the game, “Joshua is strong in the spirit but weak in the flesh whereas Clive is strong in the flesh but weak in the spirit.” And that the brothers learn to strengthen themselves in both aspects as the story progresses. It was such a beautiful and PERFECT way to describe those too! With that in mind…

If Clive was the one who survived in the end and Joshua died…I can only imagine the intense joy, relief, and despair at the Hideaway reunion. I yearn to watch the scene of Clive reuniting with his beloved Jill and Torgal and all of the Hideaway family.

The reason why I said “despair” is because I’m thinking about a very specific person – Jote. She centered her life around Joshua as his Shield during the 18 years he was with the Undying. They spent so much time together and she had come to love him as a person, not because he was the revered and worshipped Phoenix. Even if Joshua returned alive from Origin as a normal human devoid of his former Eikon, Jote would still love him the same.

It really tears my heart apart imagining her breaking down upon hearing that Joshua did not make it. I imagine that Clive, being the empathetic soul he is, would be the one to tell her and he would embrace her as she sobbed.

Even if initially their first meeting was a little tense, I feel that Clive and Jote developed a mutual respect and understanding for each other – they both love Joshua and served as his Shield.

As for Clive…I can only imagine how depressed he would be and how agonizing it would be for him to cope over his brother’s death. He thought Joshua was dead for 18 years and joyfully reunited with him...only for their reunion to be cut short by Ultima.

Perhaps Clive wrote the Final Fantasy book as a means of coping with Joshua’s death and honoring his legacy. He would have the help of Harpocrates, Cyril, Jote, and his Wall of Memories to incorporate everything into the book. Joshua became Clive's Shield in so many senses of the word and the esoteric knowledge he garnered helped Clive defeat Ultima. That's why Clive wished for future generations to remember Joshua’s name and not his own. Ultimately, writing that book helped Clive to accept his brother’s death and heal.

[daemon-in-my-head]

I liked your thoughts in the latest post and I agree with the whole "Gortash was on board with Orin's plan" take. But did Durge really have a reason to go soft? What if he actually was the opposite. What if Gortash really wanted that blue tongue up his ass, but Durge was too busy having fun with corpses cause that's the only way his father allowed? Then, if Orin's plan goes well, Durge will no longer be the chosen and Gortash might have a chance (especially with the "i am your only ally now" act)? But Gortash underestimated Orin's madness so all he got from her is loosing any contact with his now lobotomized bhaal babe. And then his return but with a new fucking lover 🥴

yea.. I am sorry if I throw too much attention your way lately

Please don't stop throwing the attention I'm a whore for talking about these vile vile lovely gremlins. I'm thriving lol

Either way back to topic; yes yes mutually assured destruction and hubris being his down fall my beloved. Long story short; I can see it, I agree, and my personal HC/the dynamic between my Durge Elli nd Gortash is a mix of both of these things lol.

Ig spoilery territory for that longfic but here's what's going on in my personal dynamic cuz it's way easier to explain this way rather than my usual round about posting:

Sooo, I should begin by saying that Gortash has been trying to get rid of Orin for a while. She's a loose canon, most definitely distracting, and she can nd will influence Elli whenever he's showing a bit too much favor to the local tyrant.

All in all, though, they were somewhat okay with the current dynamic, at least up until everybody reunited at Moonrise. Not only did my Durge grow ever more unstable with the whole 'embracing the life he wishes to have with his equal vs glory for his creator and master'- bit as things got increasingly serious, there was also the whole kinda running from trauma stuff still going on. And now, on top of that, lovely lil Orin was absolutely fed up with being 'banished' to Moonrise by Elli, so the first thing she did was a pretty open and honest assassination attempt. Granted, it failed, but Elli didn't do anything to get revenge or smth either. Didn't even confront her about it besides ridiculing her a bit for her too-slow reflexes when anyone else would've lost their life for such audacity.

And welp. That kind of caused a certain somebody to snap. Gorty found out about her plans, and decided Elli can't see reason unless she corners him even more as clearly he's way too soft on her. So he kept his trap shut about what he knew was going to happen despite some more shit he found out that rly, rly, rly should've caused him to intervene but alas. His own obsession won over the reason he wanted to see in his equal.

TL;DR Gortash wanted Elli to make a choice and stick with it as Elli's old self would've done, but Elli didn't and instead he was oddly neutral so Gortash snapped and let it happen cuz my guy can't possibly communicate about what's going on. Also he does reason with himself that no matter the outcome, either Ellis death or his choice, would be in his favour and he'd finally fully surrender and his own plan could be accomplished just the way he wants it.

So I guess soft isn't quite the right word but it also is cuz technically yeah Durge is much softer than he used to be or is with anyone else but also Gortash is being absolutely 100% unreasonable but also he is reasonable cuz Orin IS a threat to their plans and idfk. It's a mess, I adore your take, in fact I've had a similar one but I choose to make it complicated LMFAO I hope my brain made sense for this one

[loosesodamarble]

Hi Erika! For your ship game, can I get your thoughts on Obanai x Mitsuri (kny), Jellal x Erza (Fairy Tail), Lumiere x Secre (BC), and if I can be a little bold (and because I’m very curious), Henry x my oc Lorelei? Also, if you haven’t gotten asked about them Nacht x Josele (but I’m sure you’ve been asked already). Please 💖 Thank you! (Sorry if that is too much 😅)

😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈

Oh Acacia, you absolutely SPOIL ME! 🥰💖

Buckle up, folks, this’ll be a long post.

…..

To start, there shall be a trend in these ships that boils down to “brooder and comforter.” One half of the couple is a bit (or maybe a lot) down on themselves and their partner is the warm embrace they need in life. The dynamic will forever and always be beautiful to me, just as much as “two pure sweethearts.”

Obanai x Mitsuri

Makes sense and 1000% compelled by it.

Obviously Obanai and Mitsuri fit that to a tee! Obanai is very clearly a broody boy and he states outright that Mitsuri saved him with her cheerfulness and smile. But it would be a massive disservice to the ship to ignore that Obanai also was Mitsuri's comforter in a way. She felt the way that he looked at her with affection whenever they were together which meant the world to her since she felt like it would be hard to love. They never judged each other and felt loved with one another and AAAAHHHHH HADKJHFLKAUHEILTHALEKTHKAEJG!

I know I've brought this up in the past but it bears repeating that I love this ship so much that I managed to work it into a college paper about depictions of (failed) romance in Japanese literature. Because, well, in a sense Obanai and Mitsuri's love wasn't successful. Let me share a bit of that essay to get my point across.

This mutual but unrecognized love is best described by the chapter title revealing Obanai’s backstory. The Japanese title is “hitsūna renjō” (悲痛な恋情) which I would translate as “a painful, miserable romance.” Mitsuri and Obanai’s feelings of self-loathing make their love a painful burden on their hearts. Even their confession is ultimately tragic, as both are in tears and on the cusp of death when their feelings come out.

Then again, the cycle of reincarnation allowed that love to continue and be acted upon. Still, this ship makes me VIBRATE with all the emotions. It's so unfair that Gotoge was able to invest me in this romance with only brief snippets and a small reassuring epilogue. And then the fandom just hammers the stake deeper into my heart. ObaMitsu. Beloved ship~!

.....

Jellal x Erza

OOOOHHHHHH! Man, it's been forever and a half since I really watched Fairy Tail but Jerza is that ship that sticks with you (and Gajevy but that wasn't the ship asked for, now was it).

So much sense is made with the ship and it'll never not compel me.

Again, Jellal is the more blatant brooder but Erza has plenty of moments of hitting low points (and it's usually over Jellal). And again, they both act as a source of hope in each other's lives. These two knew each other as kids and they made strong impressions on each other clearly. I mean, Jellal made some strong impressions on many people for a variety of not good reasons... ANYWAYS! It makes so much sense that Erza is always holding out hope for Jellal because his turn to darkness back in the day was very out of the blue so deep down in her heart, she'd know that something wasn't quite right. And even as she loves him, Erza expects Jellal to take responsibility for his actions. You talked about it yourself when discussing this ship but with Jerza, their personal feelings don't immediately mean Jella's sins/crimes can be ignored. He has to work to right them and fix himself. Jellal changes not because he's browbeaten into it but because he wants to be better for Erza. And Jellal isn't the only one changing. Erza is able to open up and let herself wish a little more because the trauma of their history is slowly being healed. Their love is such a journey. Multiple times they're pulled apart before finding each other again. And each time they meet, they heal a little more, grow a little closer.

.....

Lumiere x Secre

I won't say as much about these two as the others but I'm still a sucker for them!

In this case, Secre is the brooding soul while Lumiere is her comfort. She looked down on herself and her magic while Lumiere saw potential and inspiration. Lumiere gave Secre something to hope for and she gave him devotion. The way Secre's love endures over the centuries and she remembers to have hope from Lumiere's example is something that makes their love really special without them ever having to be in a relationship. We don't get Lumiere's perspective on Secre directly but the fact that he named his super special magic tool (the big spherical one) after her says quite a bit to me. She's important and special and helpful in Lumiere's eyes. Secre living on while Lumiere moves onto the afterlife is sad but he wishes her more happiness in a continuing future, even without him. It's an ending of separation but not of mourning and it's beautiful (even if I wish Lumiere could've stuck around).

.....

Henry x Lorelei

UwU CC x OC time~!

I actually did read the fic where they meet a bit ago. It's just in my queue for reblogging. But ooooooohhhhhhh! I CAN GUSH HERE!

So I will be real, there is one detail of the ship that doesn't make sense to me. But that's Tabata's fault for making it that even low mana people feel drained by an extended exposure to Henry's mana draining. It's just unfair that really no one but Asta can safely be around him with his curse in place. So it's not on you. You made every other aspect of the ship wonderful. Henry definitely would fall for someone as openly sweet as Lorelei and her sense of whimsy is a wonderful complement to Henry's loneliness. The way he so shyly begins to talk to her is so in character and I think adding Lorelei to Henry's backstory helps explain why he's easily able to just talk to Yami and later Asta since he now has experience meeting someone new. Lorelei's Lucky Magic seems interesting (and fits in with David's Dice Magic) and well, I think it brought luck to both her and Henry. And do I even need to say it but this ship got me hooked with one fic. It may need more time in the microwave before it finds a permanent spot in my heart but... I'm digging the vibes already.

…..

Nacht x Josele

YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!

I’ve talked Nacsele before for the ask game but I’m gonna talk again!

GAAAAHHHH! The way Nacht always loved Josele and was content(?) to simply love her from afar... Josele harboring her love for Nacht when she felt he didn't love her back... It gets so messy when she's with Morgen because he truly did make her happier than words could say. But half of Josele's heart was with Nacht. And when they finally get together, after much heartache and soul searching and doubting, it's gorgeous. Nacht is so hesitant about the relationship that he doesn't even call Josele his girlfriend for a while because he still sees Josele as Morgen's love. Josele too was hesitant, not wanting to risk her happiness being destroyed again, but once she got a talking to from one of the Bulls, she embraced the chance to be with Nacht and helps him with his steps into the future.

AND I LOVE THEIR FUTURE TOGETHER! Josele never really stops mourning Morgen and the future they could've had. But she doesn't lose sight of the future she's attained with Nacht. She loves Nacht and the way he's able to forgive himself. And Nacht accepts that Josele will always have Morgen in her heart, he really wouldn't have it any other way. Nacht slowly but surely frees himself of his guilt and self-loathing to full embrace all the affection that Josele always had for him.

My ship... I love...

..........

AND I LOVED TALKING ABOUT AAAAALLLLL THESE SHIPS! AAADJHGLKHAIUHAETKJHAETUHUI!

Thanks for the chance to ramble, Acacia~!

[oblivious-aro]

Do you still have that ninja ranking post on hand? I'd love to hear more about your opinions on them!

Eh, it was just a plain old list with no further explanations.

But my beloved mutual deserves further explanations and opinions!

1. Nya

Being the only main female character, the writers did the thing male writers often do where they give said female character some crazy good powers and/or abilities to prove they don't hate women.

Nya got herself up to the same level as the other ninja on her own time without a teacher, built pretty much all their vehicles for a while, and could canonically take all of the other ninja at the same time before she even had an elemental power (she literally was a boss for them when she got possessed in season 2).

When Nya has a goal to achieve, she either completely slays (infiltrating Chen's high security island without an invitation? No problem!), or goes completely unhinged (yes summoning The great Devourer would be an effective way to take out Nadakhan Nya, but then you would have other problems), and both options are very entertaining. Love the go big or go home energy.

There are definately problems with that writing approach, but Nya is unironically and canonically the coolest and most powerful ninja.

She also has some really interesting story potential high-achieverness and stubborn sense of pride, even if they are underutilized.

It's a shame she was neglected by the writers so much, they don't know what they missed.

Also, I love Kelly Metzger's vocal performance. Very energetic.

2. Cole

Cole is nice.

No seriously. Sure, he makes a lot of snippy comments at the other ninja (they all do, they really should be less mean to each other), but when interacting with people who aren't ninja, Cole is always super friendly.

This is best showcased in season 4, when he gets locked up in the factory. He brings and keeps up a positive spirit that the others have completely lost. They're pretty dismissive of him at first, but after a while, his attitude actually starts to bring back hope to the others, and it's wonderful. He finds Zane, organizes an escape plan, and gets everyone on board just by being himself.

People who complain Cole didn't get any focus clearly weren't paying attention during season 4. Tournament of Elements was a better season for Cole than either season 10 or Man of the Mountain.

I also love that Cole gets jokes about how much he loves food without depicting that as making him "gross" or "greedy" (Well, up until Hunted, at least. Reason 5026 Oni trilogy sucks). It's so true Cole, there not being cake at a function is extremely disappointing.

Also he got a fang blade way faster than Kai despite having a crippling stomach ache from to much cake. What a flex.

In general he gets so enthusiastic about little things, and it's extremely charming. Like, he genuinly enjoyed the little museum tours they used to go on as teachers. I love that!

And his his core character traits of being "the strong one" is actually showcased in a lot of subtle and unique ways. There's the obvious physical strength, then there's also way he tends to fool the leader role when needed, and the fact that he often has a phobia of the monster of the season but faces it head on and overcomes it everytime.

Kirby Morrow was also an absolutely delightful voice actor (very sad to hear what happened to him).

Also he's so so aromantic coded! I'm telling you it's bonkers, and in this essay, I will-

3. Zane

I think Zane had a very unique energy. He's honest and earnest, and it's very endearing, especially in a show where the main characters tend to be so mean to each other for no reason.

"I was built to protect those who cannot protect themselves" goes sooo hard everytime. Like, damn.

His relationship with Pixal is pretty interesting, although you do have to get past the initial layer of Ninjago romance (so much blank staring and wistful sighing. Like, so much). That being said, his conversation with Pixal in season 8 after they find out she's Samurai X is a rare W for the Oni trilogy.

Outside of that though, I feel like Zane didn't get a whole lot of big moments or storylines in later season, and the writers kind of forget about the whole "protect those who can't protect themselves" thing, which was a really big draw for me.

I like his little robot powers and gags. They're pretty fun. Gives his humorous moments a very unique feel, too.

His little falcon friend is also great. Watching that bird fly to close to the dark island and Nadakhan's ship was probably the only time genuinly stressed me out. (Reason 5027 Oni trilogy sucks, they got rid of the falcon).

4. Kai

He's got a fair bit of "bland main character syndrome" going on, and then after he passes that to Lloyd, the writers just...aren't really sure what to do with him.

He gets angry sometimes cuz fire and he...flirts badly a lot and thinks he's cool.

Eh.

He does have that thing where he laser-focuses when he gets a goal in mind, but the amount I get out of Kai for the amount of focus he gets is still not a lot.

There's a reason he got taken first in Skybound.

5. Lloyd

I actually found Lloyd fairly charming as a child. He's got a good heart, but also a mischievous streak and a fair bit of juvenile passion.

But then he aged up and lost all those things, leaving him with no personality.

He's the chosen one. He keeps getting power-ups.

Wish he'd get some characterization.

Lloyd seems to be a pretty popular character in the fandom, but everything people say they like about Lloyd could've easily happened to any other character. People always talk about stuff that happened to him, and never anything he does or wants, and I couldn't tell you anything Lloyd personally wants anyway.

6. Jay

Jay definately has the most distinct personality of the group as the jokey comedy guy.

I like that he kind of breaks down when the situation gets too stressful. That, and his relationship with Nya could make for some very interesting story potential.

But then Skybound happened and turned Jay from silly and maybe a bit insecure into disgustingly selfish with no redeeming qualities.

Even outside of Skybound, Jay big plot points are fighting Cole for Nya's affection (without consulting Nya herself. A terrible side plot that Cole ultimately resolves anyway), learning to appreciate his parents more (it's not the worst, but Ed and Edna don't get a whole lot of screen time to showcase the change in their relationship, and it doesn't help that the next time we see them in season 1, Jay is acting the same way about then that he did when they first appeared), and his true potential episode, where Nya's really the one doing all the legwork.

I don't think Jay's a bad character, but every time the writers give him the spotlight, it goes terribly. Jay's never the one to facilitate his own growth, and that makes him pretty much impossible to root for.

[the-iron-queen]

Genuinely curious whats your beef with New Siwaj's works, plsplspls let me know

Oh dear.

Well, it starts with and is in many ways about UWMA. I will put a cut here because I really can't stand a lot about this show and don't want my post in its entirety to potentially jumpscare someone in the tags.

And I apologize in advance to anyone who genuinely likes UWMA and New Siwaj's directing if you actually decide to read this post. Just be warned, I have a heavy bone to pic with both.

I have only managed to drag my ass through 9 of the 17 episodes so far.

I know the show is beloved by many, but for me it's seriously the only BL so far I have straight up dropped, originally at episode 3 or 4 (although i am trying to strongarm myself back into it sometimes when i feel especially masochistic). That's in a big part to do with Ohm and Fluke and how they absolutely not work at all for me together. Usually I can say fine, a thing is not my cup of tea, but I can imagine someone else enjoying it. These two as a couple unfortunately are for me something that I (this is a personal opinion) feel very much like their chemistry and when it's just them alone in a scene is objectively pretty bad. But as I said. Personal opinion.

When I look at the entire show it just comes together why these two were just what brought out all the shows weaknesses to me, which I attribute in large parts to New.

There is his tendency to use an atrocious amount of sound effects (in UWMA not as much on display as in We Are, which annoyed me so much that I nearly dropped that too after the first episode) and his similarily tendencies to drive me up the wall will permanent reusage of the same three background tracks over several shows of which some very agressively try to tell you a scene is awkward while you just try to get into character interactions (in Between Us I had to take breaks from watching because that issue was annyoing me so much). Honestly I have seen an entirety of one single scene in which for one moment his sense of comedic sound usage worked for me, and that was with Aob as Tan, who really shouldn't be hard to not turn out funny (but by god, Aob got so much bad 'comedic' moments due to said sound and music choices in We Are too).

But back to UWMA, because that enbodies most of my gripes with New Siwaj. Honestly, I was crying four minutes into the show because Earth and Kao's performances were so good and the scenes around it decently well made. But man, does this create a tone problem, if a) - again, personal opinion- the actors you cast to play the reincarnated version of the characters can't hold much of a candle to the actors you cast for the original characters - and really i don't know how much of this is really to be blamed on Fluke and Ohm, and how much on direction and b) you create such a tone discrepancy between the past and current scenes that it makes your audience start to dread the actually god parts of the show because you're getting whiplash from pretty shallow uni badoing (yes i am aware i would probably feel different about this point if I liked Fluke and Ohm's performance as a couple) versus a sad and so deeply queer traumatic story that always had the damocles sword of it's ending hanging above it. New Siwaj wasn't able to sell me that those are supposed to be the same people because of that massive disconnect.

I have to say also, I sorta enjoy Pharm and Dean as a background couple in Between Us, weirdly. I just can't understand New's direction choices with their romantic scenes in UWMA which are - to me - hard to watch with Pharm looking very much like he's feeling incredibly uncomfortable. To be honest, I have so far only seen one actor pull off that kind of flinching away and looking so very conflicted in a supposedly romantic kiss scene in a way that still came across as mutually enjoyable for both character. That actor being Gun Atthaphan, which I am aware is unfair to compare people to, because his level is difficult to reach. But I am saying this to emphasize that New - again, to me - either didn't chose the right actors for Pharm and Dean or didn't know how to direct them. I enjoy Pharm with his friends and Dean with his club is fine, but the second those two appear on a screen together, the show flatlines because of missing chemistry and weird acting and/or direction choices.

Unfortunately the show does all of that to a point that it takes it good parts (primarily the scenes from the past) down with it. I am paraphrasing a stolen quote here - but the crime this show commits is being in parts so bad that it starts to make me question if the good parts of it were actually that good to begin with, or if New Siwaj only got lucky with a very good actor choice that didn't need much input from him.

And i am saying that all as someone who loves the reincarnation trope.

So, closing the lid on the topic of UWMA for this post.

What about other shows of his?

1) A Boss and a Babe. I genuinely didn't know until this second that that was one of his (apparently because the app version of MDL is very bad). It doesn't suffer from my usual issues with him to the same extent. I gave the show a solid 7.5/10 when i watched it and still stick with that. ForceBook also bounce nicely off each other, added plus.

2) Between Us. Surprisingly I am actually enjoying this show, mostly. It integrates it traumatic background stories much better into the story. BounPrem have good chemistry, so I can vibe with that. It basically had most of the good parts of UWMA (minus the past backstory) while leaving out the things I had issues with. My issue here was mostly what I wrote above about background music ruining scenes. I saw one minor harmful stereotype that I see in too many other BLs too, but besides that it's okay.

3) We are. It took me a while to get into that one. As mentioned above the overabundance and bad usage of sound effects in episode 1 is so awful that it made the entire show (and Tan especially - somehow it managed that) incredibly annoying. This show can't shut up. And I don't mean the actors, I mean the fucking noises. Like it doesn't trust its actors to bring the point across and actually act without SPRINGSPROINGBADOINGMEOW in the background. Besides that - the show is okay. It has its good moments. It's a uni BL with all that goes along with it, which isn't super my thing, but I can deal with it if I get great characters and an interesting story. Which in the case of We Are... eh. The thing is I feel like most of the actors can and have done better, like, the performances weren't bad, but for example I feel like Pond and Phuwin wouldn't have needed to be in that show. Those roles could have been filled by many other people, and Pond and Phuwin could have gotten something more up to their acting skills. Only standout actor for me was Aou, he took Tan and run with him in a way that gave other people a run for their money, and TanFang greatly benefitted from that. And ChainPun was cute but only a single crumb. I don't know if We Are actually could really be improved on much (besides the noise noise NOISE NOISE) and I absolutely believe this is a very valid choice for a comfort show if you don't mind the noise. I gave it a 7/10 which is very nice of me given the NOISE.

Yeah, so. Summed up: I don't think he's good at utilitizing his actors, sometimes he struggles with trusting them to create athmosphere with their acting and I still don't know what's up with Dean and Pharm if that's bad casting or bad direction. He unfortunately likes giving his BLs the soundscape and soundtrack of a Looney Tunes cartoon with sadly zero of that one's comedic timing or feeling for scenes. That's probably also to be blamed on his sound and music team, but it is *his* choice to use it like that.

I am sorry that this still turned into a rant, but New Siwaj definitely gets me going.

[hyunin]

HAPPY NEW YEAR!! 🥳 🎊

HELLOOOO EVERYONE i am going to make a new year post after all! currently beginning working on this at 11:32 pm because i know it’s going to take me a while and i thought it would be nice to spend the turning of the new year talking about my friends. i also hope you enjoy this header i’m using it because i’m too lazy to make a cute one and i might later and also one of my friends said do it or no balls. 

honestly this year went by incredibly quickly for me. it was pretty uneventful, which might be a good thing!! i did get to meet two of my best online friends in the world when i saw stray kids live this summer, and that was probably top 10 days of my life!! so i’m really thankful that happened this year if nothing else. i’m one year closer to graduating community college as a part time student, and i’ll be turning 26 this month 😭 but you know, making it another year in itself is a big accomplishment if nothing else! i’m proud of everyone that made it another year and thank you for being here with me to read this post. i really appreciate all of you, whether we’re close friends or simply beloved casual mutuals, or if you’re even just a follower of mine; thank you for putting up with and even enjoying my sporadic posting and vaguely unhinged tags and gifs and other content, whether here or over on yangjeongin.

this will be my third turn of the new year i’m celebrating with everyone on tumblr upon return from my seven or whatever year hiatus, and it’s crazy that i’ve been giffing again since 2020. some of you have been with me since all the way back then and i’m so thankful!! i didn’t spend a ton of time on my dash this year (thank u to my bad internet that takes forever to load thereby making it an incredibly frustrating experience!) but i have more in the past several weeks and i’ve really enjoyed it!! i’m hoping that only continues into 2023. 

i do want to specifically thank some people for making my life on tumblr (and in general) better in 2022, but know that even if i don’t write you a specific message i still am so thankful for you keeping me company on tumblr dot hell in whatever way you have this past year!

i’ll put all my love for everyone under the cut and i know i will forget someone and feel bad but i cannot overstate how much i love all my mutuals enough!!

first of all, to @minijeong @miyawaki @redvelvetcult @bataranqs @seulggi my awoo9ers, thank you for being part of my life every day. i love reading back what u guys have said in the gc and i love seeing your content and chatting with u and your wacky n wild senses of humor, being your friend for the past few years has made my life better and i’m looking forward to making more memories in 2023 🎉 i love u!! i do want to call out a couple awoo9 members in particular though because i have more specific things to say!!

iwin - @anyujins ; hiii i feel like there’s so much to say but also so little?? but we started talking at the beginning of this year and have talked so much since and i just wanted to say i have really loved talking to u and getting closer to you this year. i genuinely feel like i can talk to you about anything and i am soso thankful for that and for u supporting me and i’m really glad that i can do the same for you! i know 2022 has been a rough year for you so i hope 2023 is better. for both of us!! haru - @minhos ; u probably won’t see this post and GOOD because i hate getting mushy with u. gross icky ew. but you know how much i appreciate and love you (or at least i hope you do) thank you for being my friend for so many years and for essentially creating my personality bc i think all of my interests are your fault SDFSDGSDG but thank u because in the end it’s all made my life better and so have you tee - @ddonghyun ; we haven’t talked much (or at all?) this year but i think you were the first friend i made upon my return to tumblr so know i am really thankful to you and still think about you a lot whenever i’m on this account <3 i haven’t seen you on my dash in a while and i don’t know if it’s just bad timing or you are finally escaping the black hole that is tumblr but either way i hope 2023 treats you well! eri - @wonjinist ; ultimately we haven’t been mutuals for that long but u deserve ur own message because every time i see u, despite us rarely speaking and just being mutuals that see each other and support each other on dash, i’m like omg that’s my friend eri. i simply consider u my friend regardless of how much we’ve actually interacted so thank u for your effortlessly friendly warm and kind personality that makes it feel so natural to simply be your friend <3 i hope u have a great 2023!

then we move on to the stayblr pals!! there are a bunch of you that have made my life on tumblr better in the past couple of years including (but not limited to) @agibbangs @binsuns @hyunchanz @hanjesungs @seunges @minzbins @leenow @cherry-heartss @huiracha @avocadomin @innielove @jisungs thank you for all of your wonderful content and personalities on my dash! i hope to see more from y’all in 2023 and maybe we can talk some more too!

li - @connecteds ; hi beloved!! another year of me on tumblr means another year of being friends with you. sometimes it’s fun on here and sometimes it’s not but even if my time here was an absolute terrible garbage shitshow it would be worth it because i got you out of it. i’m getting emotional and i’m sitting in the living room watching new years specials with my mom rn i can’t cry LMAO but thank you for always making me laugh even when you’re having a hard time and for otherwise being so full of love, and every day i’m so grateful that some of that love is for me <3 i told you we’ll always be friends as far as i’m concerned, no matter how much or little we talk, and i really mean that. no matter what we do or where life takes us there will always be love in my heart for you. i know 2022 was really hard for you so i hope the world finally gives you back some of the love and happiness you’ve put out into the world in 2023 💫 and u know i’m gonna be here for it!! adri - @skz-films / @hyunebear ; i’m not sure which account to tag you on asdfasdgdsg i know we’ve like never spoken but i think i will always remember the gifset you made for us on yangjeongin and how much you said we inspire you that really touched my heart so thank you again :( i think about that whenever i see you on my dash and it makes my heart feel a little warmer every time i do and i think we can always use more of that in life, so thank you for making mine a little brighter this year kep - @seungknow ; kep i miss u!!! i just wanted to say hi because you deserve your own message. thank u for being my friend, and i’m glad(?) we have moved from being together in stayblr hell to pc collector instagram hell. great. amazing. may 2023 bring us many dream photocards ✨ abia - @seungminhos ; abia! i didn’t talk to you too much in the past year but i couldn’t just lump u in with everyone else it felt wrong!! missing u and the seungminhos content but i hope 2022 was okay and regardless, that 2023 is better because we can leave all that in the past now. love u <3 luna - @seunglixes ; i wanted to give you your own shoutout just to say thank you for all you do for createskz! i know life is so crazy for you sometimes but you still always do your best to keep up with the net and i think you do such an amazing job, i really admire u for that so thank you for your work and for creating such a great place for stay ccs to come together and find other great content agnes - @hyunjinz ; agnes angel beloved the fact that we have not actually spoken very much outside of tumblr tag conversations blows my mind bc you are so dear to me! thank you as always for supporting me in my stayblr endeavors even before yangjeongin existed, and for continuing to, and for being such a cornerstone in this community whether you’re making content yourself or not. you do such an amazing job of supporting everyone and i think that’s so admirable of you and really shows what a pure and kind heart you have. i hope 2023 treats you with just as much kindness!! marie - @seo-changbinnies ; marie comedic icon, free stand up show every time you’re on my dash, your tags will always be legendary. i know you’ve been going thru it recently so hang in there and know i appreciate u and miss u but it’s also so okay to take your time and focus on more important things than silly little gifs on a goofy blue website. i love you and hope 2023 brings you only good things!! vilma @hyunpic ; vilma angel...even writing this about u is making me sleepy...i’m just kidding i was already sleepy. i have always loved u but i love u even more now that we are talking more, it has been lovely!! thank u for your unhinged tags and absolutely abundant love and kindness not just for hyunjin but for everything around you. you are genuinely such a sweet person and just seeing you around boosts my serotonin so please continue doing what u do and i will message u next time i’m having trouble falling asleep <3 happy new year SZDSDGG lotta - @jizung ; lotta i think last year (or the year before?? idk) i made a post like this and said ur tags were funny and that i hope we talk more AND I FEEL LIKE WE SUCCEEDED?? either way i do consider you a friend now and also wanted to say, do not tell anyone else, but u are like in my top 5 if not top 3 ccs on this entire site i think your gifs are so nice i think u could just send me a link to every new thing u make and i would be overjoyed to see it. so here’s to another year of us making content and talking occasionally (maybe more in 2023?), i hope it’s the best one yet! ri - @foxinys ; ri!! omg u know we’ve only been talking more in the past few months mostly because of unfortunate circumstances but i regularly think about it like, well, a lot of shit is going on but at least i’m talking to ri more and that’s nice??? and i do rly enjoy talking to u! and your gifs of course. i will never forget ur gemini abundant birth chart and the fact that i guessed correctly (sort of) despite us barely talking at the time SDSDGSD and i love that <3 my astrology friend said based on the charts of people i’m friends with i tend to be drawn to gemini heavy people i think this means we were meant to be friends so may 2023 bring us friendship under better circumstances! and many other good things mia - @seungs ; mia honest to god i’ve been working on this post so long i’m getting tired ASDFSDGSDG but i love u and your content, thank u for the support and for being mary’s #1 fan in particular, sometimes i still think abt that anon that asked what grip mary had on u and laugh. i hope 2023 brings us many good things and more mc lino gifsets ✨ mona - @hyunsung ; same as above i am sounding like a broken record at this point but!! love your content and i appreciate our tag communication. we are friends as far as i am concerned i have decided this i hope u agree SDFSDGSDG but much love and good vibes for the upcoming year!! i hope we can talk more in 2023 also cassie - @seo-trashbins ; i know i talk to you like every day so i could say all of this to you anytime and i think you know all of this but i wanted to include you in this so you could see something nice next time you check tumblr. i love you very very much meeting you in person this year was genuinely one of my favorite experiences of my life. thank u for being such a good friend for all of these years. 2023 will be TEN YEARS of us being friends. thank u for loving me even when i was an annoying 15 year old and all the time in between to now. i love you!! you are funny and kind and otherwise a wonderful friend and person that i feel very lucky to know at all let alone be friends with. one day i’ll come visit you in toronto and maybe u will have ur own place and i will simply move in and live under your bed. that’s like actually the dream for me i’m ngl. but until then i’m really happy to go into our 10th year of friendship and that it’s so many of them at this point that it doesn’t even feel like that big of a deal for another new year to pass. i hope we’re friends forever 💗

OKAY ENOUGH!!!! if you read all of these for some reason you’re insane btw but thank you??? and for anyone that isn’t on here, i will once again reiterate that i appreciate you regardless. i did just get kind of burnt out i could only write so many of these SDFSDGSD but much love, i hope this post brightens your day a little and helps 2023 get off to a little bit of a better start ✨ happy new year!

[shinigamer-136649]

The Reapers' Backstories

I'm sure that most know that the reapers' backstories are HIGHLY anticipated (at least on here), but I've always wondered how that would come into play. And... I've had an idea, but I'm not sure how much I like it. I don't know if anyone has talked about this before (sorry if you have), but the way I think the reaper's backstories will be revealed is...

Cinematic Records.

Which obviously comes with some alarming prospects considering just how one is able to view these records (unless there is a library of them like in the anime) - by getting injured, or, to view the complete record, killed.

The reapers have already shown themselves to be heavily involved with the plot of Black Butler, whether it be the need to subdue the demon walking around with no consequences or the threat of the dispatch deserter running free and obscuring the line between life and death. There's no chance that they all get out of this unscathed with the desperate strings of the web of conflict ensnaring everyone.

Here's my drawing of part of said web in ms paint which I feel may have ruined the vibe of this post but it's fine

I'm also not sure why some of the reapers would, in the story, want / need to share their backstory. I could maybe see if Sascha were to share theirs, and Othello's and Undertaker's will likely be revealed, but why would people such as Grell, Ronald, or William share theirs? I don't think they're going to be going around sharing the details of their suicide to everyone unless the situation really demands it - or if their sharing is unwilling.

Black Butler is not light on violence, and there's not many characters unwilling to resort to it. Undertaker will do pretty much anything to protect the Phantomhives, one of whom just so happens to be a Bizarre Doll, who aren't exactly welcomed by the Shinigami. However, Sebastian also finds it his duty to fight the Undertaker and Real Ciel, making the reapers either a potential ally, or, as we've seen twice before, a nuisance.

Although they may be forced to team up (considering the only hit Undertaker has ever taken in the series was from Grell and Sebastian working together, and even that barely made contact), the reapers and Sebastian have shown a mutual distrust toward each other. Once they get rid of their prime threat, they're going to go after each other. And where does that leave us? Where we started, with reapers getting injured and records spilling, possibly even before Undertaker is defeated.

(Plus, I find it unlikely Undertaker is the main villain of the whole series. Maybe all three of these forces will have to align, or they might even need a god's power if their foe is an angel or other supernatural entity... but that's a post for another day.)

Essentially, we can safely assume that reapers are going to get injured, and since there have been some very entertaining "hooks" so to speak about their backstories (Chapter 105 Sascha my beloved)... I wouldn't be surprised if, in a few years, we're going to be in Book of Flashbacks part 2

Even the possibility of non-shinigami using death-scythes isn't out of the question - they don't seem to be only physically able to be used by reapers, since we've seen Sebastian and Layla wield them. In fact, speaking of Layla, in chapter 191, we see this:

Layla has a death-scythe, or at least something so similar to one that it shares the same properties. I wouldn't be surprised if this metal ends up more widely distributed over the course of the series - it provides a huge advantage to whoever has it.

In conclusion (listen what else am i supposed to say to finish this)

Reapers such as Will, Grell, and Ronald likely wouldn't have an in-story reason to share their backstories as this would likely be. not a good experience for them

However, we have gotten a few "hooks" dropped about them.

One way to put these into the story would be the Cinematic Records of the shinigami.

This makes sense because there is already a lot of conflict between Undertaker, Sebastian, and the reapers which will almost certainly lead to bloodshed at some point

We also know that death-scythes are becoming more widely distributed, so even if, say, the Undertaker is defeated by Sebastian and the reapers, it's not implausible that Sebastian could get his hands on a death scythe.

Not gonna lie I hope I'm wrong on this one I'm going to cry if any of the reapers end up dying.

[acourtofthought]

“If Lucien loved Jesminda so much that he believed she was his mate,

.......until he found out Elain is his mate,

.....does it seem realistic that he could love someone else more than that?”

Yes, because a mating bond has nothing to do with mutual attraction, romantic compatibility, or love.

Take for example, Tamlin’s parents, or even Rhysand’s parents. Mates, but no love.

And, I find it interesting that you are convinced elucien will be endgame because they don’t talk, and are uncomfortable around one another (what you refer to as “creating tension”, as SJM did with all other endgame couples). Yet, have you considered that SJM has set things up this way, because she plans for Elain to reject the bond…?

I mean think about it: if SJM is setting the stage for a failed mating bond between Elain and Lucien, then there needs to be reasons present as to why Elain (or Lucien) would reject the bond - reasons we have seen in the text already (ie. Elain stating that a mating bond does not mean she needs to return Lucien’s affections, or even Elain having feelings for someone else). If SJM is indeed going down this route, then it makes no sense that Elain and Lucien would be friendly with one another, fond of one another, or even sharing moments in the story together and growing closer… because then what reason would SJM have to break apart their mating bond, when they otherwise so clearly get along with each other? (And perhaps this is exactly why we haven’t seen any such moments between Elain and Lucien…)

So, there’s just as much foundation for a rejected mating bond between Elain and Lucien, as there is for an accepted one.

I disagree.

Especially when you take into account that your point only addresses mating bonds where my post was looking at the entire picture.

Even if Elain and Lucien do not accept their mating bond, SJM could not realistically create a third option for Lucien that would trump what he had with Jesminda.

Lucien loved Jesminda (LI # 1) so much he thought she WAS his actual mate. So where does that leave a third female (LI #3) who couldn't be his mate because he already knows Elain is? It doesn't really make sense for SJM to give Lucien a new love interest then claim, "Lucien loves LI #3 so much that SHE could be his mate", she's already created that narrative with Jesminda. And he could never love her so much that he thinks she might be his mate since he'll always know Elain is his mate despite a rejected bond.

At that point, it's not about Elain and Lucien so much as Lucien not being able to love another female as much as he loved Jesminda and I've got to say it's a bit anti-climatic in a fantasy romance novel to think, "I love her as much as I loved Jesminda except.... I thought Jesminda was my mate and I know this new person isn't". The only thing that can trump Lucien's love for Jesminda (from a literary standpoint) is for him to actually fall in love with his mate and she him because not only does he then love Elain as much as he loved Jesminda but they have the added bonus of actually being mates.

Also, Tamlin's mother DID love his father:

"My mother - she loved my father deeply. Too deeply"

It doesn't matter that his father was a "tyrant", she still loved him anyway.

And the reason Rhys's parents were not given a matched mating bond is:

"My father and my mother, despite being mates, were wrong for each other. My father was cold and calculating, and could be vicious, as he had been trained since birth." (I'm going to stop right here because out of Lucien and Az, who is "vicious and cold"? I surely hope you're not going to tell me it's Lucien). "My mother was soft and fiery and beloved by everyone she met. She hated him after a time" (who is soft and beloved by everyone? In ACOTAR we're told "she had come alive here, and her joy was infectious. There wasn't a server or gardener who didn't smile at her and even the brusque head cook found excuses to bring her plates of cookies and tarts at various points in the day. I marveled at it, - actually that those years of poverty hadn't stripped away that light from Elain". And who showed us a little bit of fire in SF when standing up to Nesta?)

E/riels focus so much on the fact that Rhys's parents had a poorly matched mating bond without paying attention to the most important part of it. The WHY they had a poorly matched bond. They were ill fitting because their personalities were too different. Az literally has the personality of Rhys's father and Elain literally has the personality of Rhys's mother, Elain who does not like cruelty. So do you honestly think Lucien, who prefers his words to weapons, who has maintained his cool and never sought out revenge against Graysen or his father or Eris, who is loving and open with his emotions, is a better fit for Elain? Or do you think Az, who is full of rage and anger and aggression, who starts fights and disobeys orders and TORTURES people, is a fit for her?

People need to stop focusing on the bond and start focusing on the personalities of the characters which is the ONLY thing that matters when you're trying to figure out who is well suited.

And you're right, a mating bond has nothing to do with love but from what the author herself has told us, if a couple has love and they also share a mating bond, it is the most rare and special of pairings.

"Not an indication of true, paired souls." A smile at me - at the rareness, perhaps of what we had."

That's my entire point. Lucien had love with Jesminda and it was real and beautiful. But if Lucien and Elain end up having love AND a mating bond (which you're fooling yourself if you think isn't still a possibility when you consider the author who is writing these books), it's the only thing that can surpass what he felt for Jesminda.

And of course I've considered if Elain will reject the bond, I don't think someone can write a well thought out post focusing on only one possibility, but with all the clues and all the patterns I've seen in SJMs writing, I don't see it as likely. Are you choosing to ignore that Nesta pushed Cassian away and avoided him too? Even though she later tells us she knew from the start that he had a power over her and that scared her?

Elucien's not considering that Elain might reject the bond isn't the problem, we all have but our logic has pointed us in the direction that they are still endgame.

The problem in the fandom is that E/riels are stubbornly refusing to consider that E/riel was always meant to be a rebound as both Elain and Az learned to let go of Graysen and Mor. A stepping stone for them both in order to continue on to end up with the person who is actually right for them. I'd much rather Elain end up with the male who has been nothing but amazing towards her, despite her current state of uncertainty, than the male who hasn't thought of her beyond his sexual fantasies. I'd much rather have her eventually realize how well matched she and Lucien are than see her end up with a male who thinks she's going to be tainted by his dirty, bad man self and doesn't think she can handle the darkness of the Trove.

[quicktimeeventfull]

greetings beloved mutual its time for me to bother you about death note. i am intrigued by some Implications in your recent Post. what do you think light would have needed to say in the warehouse to make matsuda side with him? do you think that's a thing he could have even done? you are of course as always encouraged to share any related or unrelated thoughts about matsulight

hello beloved mutual, this was buried deeply in my inbox so the post is no longer recent but i am nonetheless answering this amazing question. sorry this is so incredibly late.

first, let me just pull up the panels in question for easy reference:

personally i feel there are several ways to interpret this scene:

a) matsuda was at that point so disgusted and disenchanted by light that there's nothing light could possibly have done

b) matsuda was on the verge of siding with light

in the latter case, i feel light could have convinced matsuda if he'd just refrained from writing near's name.

i think there are many ways to interpret this series of panels. matsuda's expression is ambiguous -- it's angry, sure, but it's also uncertain. also, why doesn't he start shooting immediately? he's definitely considering something. also: the three panels along the side are deeply, deeply intimate. there's so much going on but we're shut out of everything except matsuda and light. matsuda and light's panels are paralleled in these dark colours separated by a white panel that's mostly negative space. we have a close shot of light's fingers -- one of the most expressive and intimate parts of the human body -- dripping with his blood. the scene as a whole is dealing with these abstract philosophical ideas but the moment in which matsuda must choose is embodied, personal and operates on the base level of body and blood.

then when matsuda does finally start shooting we're snapped right back out of his head. his decision isn't based on him having settled anything within his own mind. he's just reacting to the immediate threat light has caused.

honestly, you could even read this as matsuda knowing and willingly allowing light to write near's name, because those three close panels show matsuda's eyes focused directly on light's hands and eyes. you could see this as matsuda looking directly at light's writing, and being prompted into action only when ide and aizawa start shouting. i don't know if that's necessarily what's being flagged but i do think that visual language both allows for that interpretation creates a sense of ambiguity.

and then outside of this one scene matsuda is consistently teetering on the knife's edge of agreeing with kira. i would argue he actually does agree with kira but is afraid to actually say as such -- he never fully commits, but he doesn't really have any strong argument against kira other than some vague sense of 'well i know it's socially unacceptable to say this.'

so: personally i think light already had convinced matsuda of kira's righteousness. his task was more to convince matsuda that kira's goals were worth committing a intimate, personal act of violence to carry them out. imo light's failure in the warehouse is not based on his ideology but rather from the revelation of his desperation, cruelty and base-level incompetence. he could have convinced matsuda if he's just waited and placed complete trust in him rather than betraying matsuda by acting on his own. anyway!! that's my very long and very belated explanation. i highly welcome any thoughts you have on this or just about matsuda/light in general, i feel you really are the matsuda expert.

[daveslutstaine]

Thank you to both @celestial-dragoness and @elliotironmaidenfan for tagging me in this <3 it's a "get to know the blogger" type of thing and it looks fun!!!

Icon:

My icon is a picture of Marie Antoinette and Oscar de Jarjayes, characters from the manga Rose Of Versailles. I was originally going for a picture of just Oscar herself since she's my favorite character, but I really liked this one so I made it my icon! I should also note that I am typically not big on Shojo mangas, but Rose of Versailles was not what I expected and I say that in a good way! I love the art style to bits (I can't stand the moe style), I love the story so far, and most of all, I love Oscar as a character. She reminds me of myself in a lot of ways.

Header:

I believe this comes from a painting of Queen Henrietta of England with her brother, but I could be wrong on that. My eyes only briefly scanned the description of the painting so I don't remember exactly what it said, but all that aside, I thought it was a really sweet image so I made it my header.

Description:

I'd describe this blog as an expression of my interests. I've never been able to find anyone else who shares similar interests to me offline, so I come here to yell into the void, and some people happen to like that and relate, so yeah.

Content:

What you'll find here is a combination of my musical interests and other parts of me, of my faith, occasionally of my beliefs, and of my other miscellaneous interest. I really like horror, so occasionally I'll post of about that. I used to post about cryptids since I love them so much (vampires especially), but I now have a separate blog for that so I won't be clogging up this blog too much with that type of stuff.

Background color:

Red. I see people as colors, and I feel like the color red suits me. I also got tired of keeping my blog edgelord black like all the other rock/metal music blogs on here. I also felt that it made more sense for my blog to be red since it also fits my second most beloved genre, classical music.

URL meaning:

Ah yes my famous URL lmao. I remember I originally wanted 'memestaine' but someone else already had it unfortunately. My original URL was some edgy Black Veil Brides lyrics I used to like (yeah yeah you guys can boo me later), and since I had grown out of them, I wanted to change my URL to reflect my new interest. Dave had already cemented himself as one of my favorite musicians, so I wanted a URL that had something to do with him. I read an article on here from a mutual where he talks about his past, and at some point he describes himself as a "slut". I thought it would be funny to make my URL daveslutstaine as a result, and I do not regret it one bit.

Blog title:

I don't have one since I haven't found one that I really like, but maybe someday I will

I now leave this an open tag