#This post is about Douglas Adams btw

[themountainrambler]

Man I love finding a philosopher/sociologist/Analyzer-Of-Things that agrees with me. Like the feeling of thinking about something, forming an opinion, and then finding out other people ALSO thought about the thing AND reached the same conclusion as you is unmatched

[edapparently]

Dirk Gently's Holistic Book Collection

This is kind of a follow up to my previous post regarding me starting the Dirk Gently books and kind of a rant about what I thought of The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul and kind of an update in general really I mentioned in my last post that the reason I started reading Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency was partly because of my love of Douglas Adams' other work and partly because I needed a distraction from the difficult time I was having in my personal life. In that time: my ridiculously generous friend @spiritbox713 began buying me books I wanted in order to make me feel better. It started with a copy of Isaac Asimov's The Complete Robot that I had spotted on a shelf in Waterstones and made a comment about, but I didn't buy it because I already had 3 whole books in my hands that I was already going to buy. He, while I waited for him by the door to finish buying what he had told me was manga, bought it for me and when he presented it to me on the street it took almost every fiber of my being not to start sobbing in public Then a little time past and I began Dirk Gently just as things hit a very low point for me. I didn't mention this last time because I don't often like to talk about my feelings publicly, but that book was like a light house that kept me pointing in the right direction through the storm I was attempting to navigate. I would get upset and then I would open the book and suddenly there was light ahead of me to keep me going. It's part of the reason I felt like I should make my last post about it and possibly why I feel so attached to it now Speaking of my last post, that was when my friend re-entered the picture to draw me back into the maddening infinity of his care and generosity. It wasn't long at all after he read it that he began texting me about something I should expect to arrive at my house and then sent me a picture of an order he had made to my address. He bought me both The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul as well as The Salmon of Doubt in one go and was having them delivered straight to me Needless to say, I am eternally greatful to him and I owe him a great deal in return for what he's given me. I am so, so lucky to have someone like him in my life, along with all my friends who have helped me get through the hard times I've been dealing with. If any of them are reading this then I want them to know that they are loved by me and I would never ask for any other people to have been in my life Since then, I have completed my collection myself and now have all the Douglas Adams books I could wish for. Including my old and battered copy of Hitchhiker's Guide that got me into his work in the first place. Now, however, when I look at or even think of these books I won't be able to help myself but think of the times my friends showed me kindness and compassion that came with them and how they collectively (one might dare say 'holistically') held me together during the darkest of times

I have now finished The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul and will soon be moving on to The Salmon of Doubt. And so I will add my comments on the second book in the series here [Spoilers Ahead BTW]: When I read the first book, I was surprised at how different it was to the American TV show, but when I read the second book I was mostly surprised by how different it was to the first. And to be perfectly honest: I actually really like that In a series with such a strong Sci-Fi/Supernatural opener as Dirk Gently, I find it to be a refreshing and unique next step to instead go into mythology rather than back into Science Fiction. For me, it regained that sense of not knowing where the story was going to next and felt very mysterious and grand It also left me with a slightly different feeling than the first book. The first was amazing to complete and upon the instant of closing it made me feel wonderous and satisfied. Meanwhile the second I had to think about for a little while before being suddenly struck with the realisation of how brilliant it was. Though obvious in retrospect, I had not clocked that the Golden Eagle was supposed to be the missing fighter jet, and I only realised after I had put it back on my bookshelf and was trying to go sleep when I suddenly made an "OOOHH" sound in the middle of the night that was a bit lounder than I can admit without embarrassing myself Regardless though, it was an atmospheric, funny and mysterious read that I thoroughly enjoyed. Douglas Adams never fails to entertain me and I look forward to reading what he finished of The Salmon of Doubt and then beginning the Hitchhiker's Guide books all over again after years of waiting

[yellowocaballero]

What are your tips on writing things that are both comedic and hard-hitting? Your style reminds me of Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams in that sense, and I was wondering if you had any specific ways of hitting that balance of wit and feeling

No pressure to answer btw :)

Hello! My good friend @lazuliquetzal made an excellent post on this, so check it out! I can't phrase it better than she did.

To say something additional: a part of it is not an actual tip and it is the fact that I am just like this. It is just the way I talk. I'm an extremely obnoxious person IRL whose dialogue is half jokes.

This is something I've talked about several times before but I can't find the posts on my Tumblr. But there is a difference between a comedy and jokes. A comedy is in the structure of a story - how it's paced, the sequence and type of action, the character dynamics, and the internal logic of the story. In a comedy you either have a more straightforward style or you figure out how to make the narration itself funny and phrase things in a funny way. A joke is a joke. I use jokes in dramatic stories to cut melodrama and give a palate cleanser, to provide rapport between two characters, to humanize and personalize the setting, and because life is inherently just a little funny. We laugh every day. Things don't feel realistic to me if people never do little funny things or crack dumb little jokes. But similarly, comedies don't feel real either if there's no pathos or genuine depth to the characters - if the characters don't feel like people we know, or if we can't identify them in real life.

The best tips are the one LazuliQuetzal gave tbh. There is a time and a place for humor, and if it's badly placed then it can be super awkward. Balancing wit and feeling is just a matter of figuring out the right pacing, story beats, and uhhh that 'up/down' feeling in a story outline? A comedy is a specific type of story, and learning how to write a comedy is just as much of a skill as learning how to write a drama. Pterry used comedy as social commentary and Adams followed an artistic style of absurdism that has its own social commentary in an extremely British and 1980s way. I think, if your characters in comedies are designed as actual people with coherent internal logic and depth and not just joke machines, then the pathos comes. The jokes come too.

Not a great answer :(. I get this Q a lot and it's always so hard to give a good answer. It's partly just your own natural sense. It's partly skill-building and learning how to write a comedy. It's partly having your finger on the pulse of pacing and story beats, which is an intuitive understanding which is only gained with experience. The drama is in the natural character pathos, not justifying the comedy. Also, I'm biased, but I don't think comedy needs to be in a story for a reason and you don't have to wax philosophical on Tumblr.edu about why comedy in fiction saves the universe. Fiction is entertainment and jokes entertain effectively. That's really it.

[glompcat]

Hello, your post about Romana from the other day got me to get the 4da story you were talking about as it was on sale for Tom Baker’s birthday. But anyways, I really like the concept of a character like Sartia, and I feel like they need more with her. I can see her teaming up with Pandora or being sent by the black guardian as it was the white guardian who sent Romana. Anyways, I feel like the concept of a character like Sartia was wasted and we should really know more about Romana’s friendship with her.

Romana did say in the audio Neverland that she didn’t have any friends, so I feel like her encounter with Sartia really made an impact on her and she was starting to accept that by the time she became president.

But we barely know anything about the Doctors academy days, so I’m not sure we’ll learn much about Romana’s.

Oh yeah, I like to think that Romana probably spent quite a lot of time contemplating her past relationships while imprisoned on Etra Prime, because the apocalypse element mineral is clearly pure concentrated trauma and angst.

I also wonder if in the version of events where Taris and Rorvan were present, Romana ever bothered with Sartia. Or more importantly, if a large reason she was so ostracized was because back when their class was forming friend groups Romana had those two and then one day simply woke up without any memory of having friends while all of her peers already had long established friend dynamics, leading her to cling to her work partner and try to reconcile having a vague sense she wasn’t always so alone with the scraps Sartia offered her.

As for Sartia returning, in the interviews at the end of those audios they talk a lot about possibly bringing Sartia back one day, and I really do hope they find an excuse to do so because she really is a character with sooooo much potential (who knows, maybe they will do more 4DAs with Romana. I mean Big Finish has certainly mastered distance recording so where someone is living is very much not an issue, and if nothing else the appeal of recording without ever being in the same room as Tom Baker may get Lalla Ward to at least give it a try. But I doubt it’ll happen). They did have a long arc the Black Guardian showed up in during the 4DAs (which took up a good chunk of Mary Tamm’s 4DA audios) but it continued to leave the whole Black Guardian thing very much unresolved and just kind of there, so why not do another volume with both Sartia and the Guardian returning to make things more conclusive?

Mainly though you have caused me to vividly imagine what things would have been like if the Black Guardian had put together his own rival team to hunt down the Key to Time during Season 16.

In the appendix at the back of novelization of The Pirate Planet James Goss says that when he looked over Douglas Adams’s original notes relating to Doctor Who, he discovered that Adams contemplated having Xanxia be the Master, so my mind is going directly to the Master and Sartia showing up everywhere the Quest for the Key took Four and Romana.

(I love this appendix btw. There is a LOT there about the development of Season 16 and what went into Romana’s creation in particular. It’s great)

Sometimes the Master and Sartia could do the wacky costume thing the Master is so fond of and be entrenched in the world (the Master would enjoy being one of the BIDS in Stones of Blood, and I am sure Sartia would enjoy using her Time Lord engineering skills on Tara to get a job being horrible to Princess Strella), other times they could just try and seduce their counterpart away from the quest, and mainly they’d have the worst dysfunctional relationship possible (Sartia would def. have a LOT of thoughts about Crispy’s whole.... thing). I imagine that the Master would have done a pretty good job of making life hard for the Doctor on Atrios, probably would have a really good costume going, really had the Doctor convinced of their whole scam, until Drax would ruin in it all by shouting “Koschei! Should have known I’d see you here too, still together with Thete then, eh?” as soon as he lay eyes on the Master.

Thank you so so so much for inspiring that train of thought.

Another train of thought you inspired was how Sartia would have reacted to the entire Pandora civil war, and honestly she’s fucked up enough to just be jealous of it all. Like she wouldn’t take a side and would just be bitter af. I can just imagine her complaining loudly about it to some poor Dogma Virus ravaged individual who can’t actually understand her. “Why does Miss Perfect Ice Maiden always get everything, including powerful ancient Gallifreyans helping her to become Imperiatrix and rule the universe? How unfair is that, I should be the vessel of this great power, I wouldn’t squander that sort of honor like Mana! Ugh, and just look at her, she’s wearing that smug face of hers she had back at school, this whole thing is just so typical. And did you hear that Tutor Braxiatel was willing to sacrifice his mind to keep her safe? Ugh WHY does she always get EVERYTHING!?!”

In all seriousness I would love to learn more about life at the Academy in general. I can not state enough how cool it would have been to have more time with the students we met in Insurgency.

Thank you again for this ask, I am having sooooo much fun continuing to imagine that alt Season 16, you have no idea.

[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching Good Omens (ALL OF IT)

my favourite novel is now my favourite mini-series and IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL

under the cut: a very long, spoilery six-episode reaction to MY NEW FAVOURITE THING EVER

--

may 31st 07:36pm nz

i posted my episode 1 reaction a couple hours ago but that got ZERO NOTES so i assume people are either avoiding spoilers or aren’t interested, which is fine, but i’m just gonna put all my reactions in one big post so anyone who IS interested doesn’t have to read 6 separate posts c:

edit june 1st 04:08am: btw i watched using a free trial on amazon prime, which i’m pretty sure is worldwide. soooo if yOU WANT TO WATCH THIS, YOU CAN, FOR FREE

--

EPISODE 1: In the Beginning

--

04:03pm

idk how much i’m gonna type, whether i’ll post a reaction to the entire thing in one post....... or how much i’ll end up watching right now

kinda want to spread it out and save it as a treat for after i’ve done some writing

but right now i wanna watch before writing

so maybe i’ll do one ep, write something, then return to this?

edit: aahhaha that didn’t happen

-

04:04pm

I’M SO EXCITED

I’VE BEEN WAITING SO LONG

well... since 2011 when i first read the book

but regardless it’S BEEN 84 YEARS

-

04:05

okay first off i did not know amazon prime did adverts at the start of their videos. so i was like SINCE WHEN WAS CHILDISH GAMBINO/DONALD GLOVER IN GOOD OMENS

and then

yeah

no

either way i thought it was a good opening

-

W A R

NING

cool cool cool cool cool

-

omg i’m used to where the netflix full-screen button is, and on amazon prime that’s the “next episode” button so i gotta be real careful

-

dear god my video quality is TERRIBLE

i.......... i might torrent this show and watch it offline

this is horrendous i can’t see a damn thing

i have never seen pixels this big

-

04:11

okay the quality calmed down after a minute

i loooove the intro, i love that it’s basically word for word from the book

i feel like i’d find it funnier if i hadn’t read the book 3 months ago

-

also? god is a woman? yes

-

04:13

is it just me or does the snek have a slightly david tennant-esque quality about it

-

i’m so happy adam and eve are black

-

04:17

omfg. aziraphale said “ineffable” and now CRAWLEY’S CHECKING HIM OUT TRYING TO SEE IF HE HAS ANY JUNK

WOW

...or y’know, looking for a flaming sword. SAME FUCKING THING.

-

also i looove how FLUFFY azi is

-

azi: “do hope i didn’t do the wrong thing”

i fucking love them both uhrgughhhuhuhughuhhh

-

04:21

small sob for cuteness

umbella wings

-

04:23

in the opening titles, crowley just stopped a spaceship and aziraphale turned it into fish

i feel like that was a douglas adams reference and i’m on board

-

04:25

the entire time i read the book, up until i saw video promos of this show, i thought “crowley” was said the same way as spn’s “crowley”, as in “crahwlee”

not “crOhwlee”

i definitely like that they’re different though

both probably named after aleister crowley tbh. all of whom are queer.

-

THOSE SWAYING HIPS

i haven’t found david tennant attractive in about 9 years but WHOOOP HELLO AGAIN

somehow attractive for entirely different reasons than before. like. my taste changed but tHEN

-

i’m on crowley’s side, taking down a cellphone network is VERY ANNOYING

-

04:35

crowley: shitshitshitshithsit

:D

i can’t wait for aziraphale’s big swear

-

04:37

i miss eating sushi

sushi was great

-

04:43

this baby delivery thing is sTRESSFUL

“aaaaurthurrrrr”

nooo

poor lady

-

04:45

“little toesie woesies”

where’s the sister mary loquacious fan club and where do i sign up

-

i’m glad they colour-coded the babies and did the playing card explanation because this part of the book always tied my brain in knots

-

05:00

this is reminding me how utterly gross england is

-

“MY POINT IS............. DOLPHINS”

YES

-

05:06

see in the book

i never once realised that the nanny was crowley in disguise

-

05:11

digging the snake tattoo sideburns

-

05:14

and yeah the short hair looks good

-

05:15

fINALLY crowley called azi “angel”

-

05:17

crowley: “oh no no don’t do your magic act, pleeease”

the magic act scene is one of my fave parts of the book <3

-

05:20

aw man they cut out the best part

i mean i get why

the kids shouted a bunch of gay slurs at aziraphale

and there were no secret service people with guns

but aw mannn

AND THEY CUT OUT THE BIT WITH THE DEAD DOVE AND CROWLEY BRINGS IT BACK TO LIFE FOR AZIRAPHALE

THAT WAS MY SINGLE FAVOURITE BIT OF THE BOOK

AND IT’S GONE

;C

-

OH WAIT

THERE’S THE DOVE

OH GOOD

-

aw man aziraphhale just brought it back himself

i liked it better in the book

they sat on the steps outside and crowley comforted azi and took the dove and fixed it for him, and then it flew off

idk i just had such a perfect image of that moment in my mind and this was..... good but not the same at all

could be gayer

-

05:27

good dog

-

05:28

crowley: *snifsnif* something’s changed

aziraphale: “oh it’s a new cologne, my barber suggeste--”

crowley: “no no i know what you smell like”

gayyyyyyyyyy <3

-

05:31

okay that’s ep 1 watched!!! i’ll watch more maybe later tonight :D

ENJOYING THIS SO FAR

not as gay as expected ........YET

needs 400% more “angel” and “dear”

--

EPISODE 2: The Book

07:42pm

pillar of salt guy: “something smells evil”

the fact crowley smells evil and yet aziraphale likes his company regardless says a lot

-

07:49

fully expected crowley to say “i didn’t fall, i sauntered vaguely downwards”

-

07:50

iiiii’m finding the narrator a little annoying

maybe it’s because i read the book so i know what’s going on

but saying “he has four items to deliver in his van. he works for this postage company and he’s making his first delivery in a formal warzone”.... idk i feel like all of those things could be shown visually? saying it rather than showing it probably saved seven seconds of airtime, but damn

-

07:56

i wonder if the narrator was a later addition to this, for new audience clarity? the script for god just seems a little stilted, idk

edit: i kind of got used to it, but it was still jarring, which i’m sure was the opposite of the intended effect

-

08:09

the saddest newt

-

08:13

she’s kind of exactly how i imagined her in the book

and definitely my fave next to aziraphale and crowley

-

08:17

i feel so bad for crowley’s plants

poor babies

-

08:19

for some reason i imagined her as a redhead. kind of more like mrs weasley

-

08:33

these wee children......... so soft.......... so smol

-

08:25

v happy with the casting for pepper

tiny downside is that we lose another redhead

-

08:29

i find the kids’ conversations hilarious because they’re the same age as harry potter when he goes to hogwarts the first time

idk if this is what eleven year olds are like in real life, but when i read the book i did feel distinctly like they spoke like eight year olds

-

08:35

crowley: “i like spooky. big spooky fan, me”

he just sounds like the tenth doctor

-

08:36

YEEE FINALLY CROWLeY DOING NICE THINGS FOR AZIRAPHALE

-

08:48

"you know, crowley, i’ve always said that deep down you really are a--”

“SHUT IT”

DON’T YOU CALL HIM NICE YOU PRETTY BASTARD

-

loquacious: “sorry to break up an intimate moment”

-

08:45

i imagined anathema’s tripod thing to be about 5 feet tall, not a cute little knee-high thing

-

08:48

freddie mercury: BIIIII CYCLE

BIIIIIIII CYCLE

yeah i was waiting for that

-

crowley: “get in, angel”

HE MURMURED

DON’T MURMUR YOUR TERMS OF ENDEARMENT noo

-

09:00

end of episode 2!!! i freaking loved aziraphale vs the book <3

-

the credits for this ep credit konnie huq as someone named pam but idk who that is? i had a crush on konnie huq as a kid when she was a presenter on “blue peter”

OH WAIT RIGHT the lady on the breakfast show on crowley’s tv. aw such a small part. hoping we’ll see her again later

edit: nope. might rewatch that part to pay more attention. obviously i didn’t even recognise her after like.. 15 years

--

EPISODE 3: Hard Times

09:05pm

brb gotta get some food

-

09:14

and now i wait for food

EPISODE THREE LET’S GO

is this the one that’s just crowley and azi’s backstory?

-

09:16

i can’t even put my finger on why but he’s getting more attractive

-

09:21

ah yes

aziraphale is eating shellfish and trying to tempt crowley

“oh... that’s your job”

i love this part of their dynamic

-

09:29

i adore when crowley makes aziraphale smile <3

-

09:43

SAUNTERED VAGUELY DOWNWARDS

YEE

-

i like seeing how crowley’s sunglasses differ throughout history

-

09:36

“if they knew i’d been... fraternising”

this is such a forbidden romance i love ittttt

-

09:49

CROWLEY SAVED THE BOOKS

and SOFT VIOLIN PLAYS

THIS IS A FUCKING LOVE STORY

k this is my favourite part of the show so far <3

-

09:50

this angel just fell in love

right in that moment

i see cartoon hearts around him

-

09:54

just had to pause for a second bc there was some broccoli in my tea :c

-

09:56

awwwwwwwwwwwwww 

he got him holy waterrrrrrr

-

UNIVERSAL ANGLE OF HETEROSEXUAL LONGING

-

definitely feeling a lot of “NOW KISS” right about now

-

09:59

LAUGHING BECAUSE THE OPENING CREDITS ARE LITERALLY HALFWAY INTO THE EPISODE

-

10:03

throughout the entire book azi just came across as the kind of person who wore glasses even though glasses were never once mentioned

I AM GLAD TO SEE GLASSES

-

10:12

i like this colour palette and the gold in their makeup

-

10:27

“we can go off together”

omg the world’s ending and crowley’s all RUN AWAY WITH MEEE

-

10:31

okay then

good eyelashes

edit: i also like how their relationship was explained with a simple tap on the wrist: hurry up, you’re on the clock, i’m a sex worker, finish your call because i’m leaving

-

10:32

episode three DONE

these eps don’t feel long enough

maybe that means the pacing is just right? who knows

i feel like i should be doing something other than watching this but..... why

--

EPISODE 4: Saturday Morning Funtime

10:48pm

aziraphale is SOFT and he’s perfect like that <3

fuck u gabriel and your body shaming

-

10:53

i want delivery guy to be okay BUT I READ THE BOOK

so............... i know he will be...... eventually

-

10:55

how did they get photographs taken in the 1600s

-

oh gabriel’s eyes ARE purple, i thought i was seeing them wrong

-

11:02

“maud i love you”

noo ho hoooo

-

11:09

a little douglas adams, definitely

BUT NO PEPPER POT DALEK

AWW

-

11:10

the season is very much jumping between summer and autumn

though i suppose that’s the point, tadfield is just perfect

-

11:12

“which the internet has begun to refer to as the kracken”

i wonder if good omens inadvertently inspired me to write The Wireless a couple of years back. wouldn’t be surprising

edit: no, couldn’t have, because the internet wasn’t much of a thing (or a thing at all?) in the book, given its publish date

-

11:20

that’s a v nice dress/top combo

gosh she’s so pretty

-

11:30

crowley: “we can run away together!!! alpha centauri!!!”

aw baby

-

crowley: “i’m going home, angel! i’m getting my stuff, and i am leaving. and when i am up in the stars, i won’t even think about you!!”

THAT WAS A V SAD BREAKUP NOOOOO

why has there not been a single “dear” yet :c

-

11:37

oh no, this part

i loved this in the book but i am NOT READY for maggots

damn you gaiman

-

11:39

he’s so cute

and so gay

-

11:42

uriel: “don’t think your boyfriend in the dark glasses will get you special treatment in hell”

he looks kinda delighted uriel called crowley his boyfriend

i would say he looks worried but this shot was used without context in the trailer and it came across as genuine joy, i actually thought he was looking at crowley

-

11:46

i thought it was a strange throne before

a spider at the centre of a web

dark halo

yeah

-

11:51

oh now she’s a redhead???

-

also i’m glad they implied newt and anathema just kissed because the sex thing was weird in the book

-

okay never mind

hmm

-

12:05

aziraphale: “oh.................ffffUCK.”

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH

-

12:07

oh no

it’s happening

oh no

i hate this part but i love what happens because of it

-

12:29am

i have eaten and now i have tea and i am back from MORE BOOKSHOP FIRE

-

EPISODE 5: The Doomsday Option

12:31

nuuuuuuuuuu

and “you’re my best friend” playing while crowley’s tryna call azi

nuuuuuu

-

“somebody killed my best friend”

jfhsdfjsdj

/sobs

-

12:36

freddie mercury: “somebody find me somebody tooo ooo looove”

edit: the narration WRECKED this. it was so dramatic and visually emotional but the voiceover completely screwed with it and it was SO UNNECESSARY.

-

12:46

crowley: “i lost my best friend”

he says, while crying, while talking to that friend

-

THE ONE BOOK HE WANTS IS THE ONE CROWLEY SAVED

THEY’RE SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL TOGETHER

-

azi wanted to share crowley’s body

and then said they had to get a wiggle on

-

12:52

they cut out the hell’s angels / lesser horsemen

i figured they would, but still a shame

-

1:54

in the book tracy’s “spirit guide” was native american but daaaaaamn that part really needed to go

now she’s irish which is... better, probably

-

01:01

ron: “SHUT. UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP”

this guy’s having the time of his life

-

01:03

he wave

-

01:05

1926 bentley; sexiest car right next to the ‘67 chevy impala

-

01:08

omg gotta translate and explain the road

-

01:13

OH NO the maggots are about to happen

they changed the placement of this but it worked for the pacing

-

OH NO

-

k well the maggots were gross but not as bad as i imagined

-

01:31

omg the dog turned upside down rather than be picked up

i wonder if that was intentional

dog: I DO NOT WANT UP

-

01:34

pfff he’s reading “american gods” by neil gaiman

-

01:44am

10/10 flaming car

-

EPISODE 6: The Very Last Day of the Rest of Their Lives

01:51am

here we go...

-

01:55

azi so happy that crowley said the dress suits him <3

-

01:57

rip bentley

-

01:59

aziraphale: “we are here to lick some serious butt!!”

crowley: “kick!! kick, aziraphale, for heaven’s sake”

-

02:06

i freaking love the parallel between the Them and the horsemen in the book

and i love that they did face shots to show the parallel

pepper = war

wensleydale = famine

brian = pollution

adam = death

the parallel is less clear for brian and wensleydale, at least in the show. was more obvious in the book. but at the same time i kind of got confused between them a lot, brian was always eating, but wensleydale was named after cheese

-

02:14

pepper: “i do not endorse everyday sexism”

/STOMPS ON WAR’S FOOT

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

-

02:25

shadwell: “anyone who wants ta get ta the hoore of babylon will have to get past me”

earlier anathema said “boyfriend”

may i point out that all the adults are paired up

shadwell & madame tracy

newt & anathema

......and....

aziraphale and crowley

-

0:28

crowley: “we are FUCKED”

these two need a holiday

-

azi: “come up with something... or.... or i’ll never talk to you again”

he knows crowley loves him aww

perfect blackmail material

-

02:32

they went from trying to kill him to being his gay angel parents real quick

-

02:35

thought they were holding hands for a second there

edit: regardless, a whole damn airfield and they’re 2cm apart

-

02:39

happy ending for the postman, hooray~

-

crowley about the bookshop, softly: “it burned down. remember? you can stay at my place”

awwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

-

02:42

CROWLEY GOT HIS CAR BACK AND YET HE TOOK A TAXI

-

02:45

anathema: “why is your car called dick turpin?”

newt: “dick turpin is a famous highwayman. it’s called dick turpin because everywhere it goes, it holds up traffic”

i laughed

this wasn’t in the book and i always wondered

-

02:51

i wonder if holy water wouldn’t burn him because he’s too good

-

03:00

gabriel: “don’t talk to me about the greater good, sunshine, i’m the angel fucking gabriel”

really enjoying these swears

-

03:03

i thought so

-

03:30am

paused for a bit to get ready for bed

i thought it was after 4am but nope

-

“there would be other summers, but not one like this. not ever again”

that genuinely makes me emotional

i think that’s why it’s my favourite book, i can relive that summer with them

-

03:35

omg

-

OH MY GOD

WAIT

THEY

OH MY GOD

THEY WEREN’T IMMUNE, THEY JUST SWAPPED PLACES

HOLY SHIT

edit: THIS WAS NOT IN THE BOOK AND IT’S BRILLIANT AND I’M GLAD IT’S HERE

-

crowley: “let me tempt you to a spot of lunch?

azi: “~temptation accomplished~!”

THEY’RE SO STINKING CUTE

-

“just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing”

perfect

STILL NO USE OF “DEAR” THOUGH AND IT’S KILLING ME

-

that ending with the bird made me teary-eyed

-

credits: BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH AS SATAN

WOW

OKAY

AKSFJDSF /snorts

-

the end credits and the song i just wanna bawl my eyes out

i loved this so much and i’m so glad it was GOOD

i loved that they added so many people of colour. in the book i imagined crowley played by alexander siddig (star trek: deep space 9 era) but i guess david tennant makes a pretty good crowley too

i’m trying not to be upset that my favourite scene with the dove and aziraphale’s affectionate use of “dear” was taken out

but 

this was damn good regardless. even gayer in places than in the book

-

this nightingale song is my new favourite song

i never got the reference before

“and as we kissed and said goodnight, an nightingale sang in berkeley square:

GAY

SO GAY

i love

-

the end of the credits “For Terry”

ACTUAL OUT LOUD SOBBING

TERRY YOU WOULD’VE LOVED THIS

NEIL DID YOU PROUD

-

oh this was so beautiful

i’m gonna watch it again with my family probably within the week. i’m so emotionally tender now

azIRAPHALE WAS SO FLUFFY AND CROWLEY WAS SO NICE ABOUT THE BOOKS

ugh i love them more than ever

anathema...... i don’t know if i relate to her, want to be her, look up to her, want her to mentor me, live with her, or find her attractive. maybe all of the above. but she was freaking PERFECT. PE R F E CT 

the casting was so... just right. thank you casting people for anathema.

like... i also didn’t mind the newt/anathema thing so much now. it was hard to tell in the book how much of a relationship they had after, but that smile she gave while lying in bed the morning after, that worked, it said a lot. and i like that it was her choice to burn the prophecy sequel rather than newt’s suggestion

gabriel was amusing. like.. i’m glad he wasn’t in the book. but he was great here. also really like michael and uriel. uriel was so damn beautiful.

i also would really have liked to see a mention of the fact crowley and aziraphale are both agender and potentially asexual. not even a hint of it here. buuuuuut it guess i know from the book. so.

my favourite episode was of course episode 3 with crowley and aziraphale’s 6000 year backstory. especially the 1940s bit where crowley saved the books <3

this show was was less confusing than the book too. ugh it was done so well

OH

we didn’t see where the soldier guy went when aziraphale zapped him away!!! in the book he reappeared safely back home and went out to see his family. to be fair i don’t know whether he died and went to heaven, but it was a nice thing to happen

and they took out the Them’s bully/rival gang, who was led by the third baby from the baby swap, and who won awards for his tropical fish. at least that’s what i remember. which meant the parallel about heaven/hell being rival gangs was lost here. but the parallel between the horsemen and the them was stronger than ever and i loved that.

look, i mean, 10 out of 10, EASY.

favourite thing? yes. yes, absolutely.

--

shoutout to the one time i wrote a Good Omens/Destiel crossover fic The Angel Cake Challenge

IT’S 04:02am THIS TOOK ME 12 HOURS

04:40am AND FORTY MINUTES TO EDIT

congrats if you made it to the end of this!!! thank you for reading <3 AND GO WATCH THE SHOW IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY

[undefeatednils]

30 Questions Tag

RULES: answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs whoever you’d like to get to know better. I got tagged by @acidmatze, btw

NICKNAMES: (none that stuck xD)

GENDER: Male

SIGN: Cancer

HEIGHT:  1.91 meters/6′2′‘

TIME: 19:21

FAVORITE BANDS: Daft Punk, Queen

FAVORITE SOLO ARTIST: Weird Al Yankovic

SONG STUCK IN MY HEAD: "Lovefool” by The Cardigans

LAST MOVIE I SAW: I honestly can’t remember, sorry

LAST SHOW I WATCHED: The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

WHEN DID I CREATE MY BLOG: May 2013

WHAT DO I POST: Politcs, memes, positivity stuff, cartography & vexillology, cute animals, and sometimes some fandom stuff

LAST THING I GOOGLED: Penny Heart Events

DO I HAVE ANY OTHER BLOGS: only a dead ask blog/quasi-art project

WHY DID I CHOOSE MY URL: Iserlohn is sadly still taken, and this URL is inspired by the awesome @fierce-katzchen and a convo we had

FOLLOWING: 814

FOLLOWED BY: 557

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: Between 5 to 9 hours, but generally on the lower end

LUCKY NUMBER: none

INSTRUMENTS: ukulele

WHAT AM I WEARING: a wine red polo, cargo shorts, and socks (god, that sounds like I’m a prep jock xD)

DREAM TRIP: United States (to visit close friends there)

FAV FOOD: “Whatever as long as theres pasta” (yes, dude, I’m literally stealing your answer because #mood)

NATIONALITY: German

FAVORITE SONG: “Crying in the Rain” by a-ha, “Something About Us” by Daft Punk, “Hurt” by Johnny Cash, “Don‘t Stop Me Now” by Queen

LAST BOOK I READ: “The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy” by Douglas Adams (a re-read because I was in the mood for it)

TOP 3 FICTIONAL UNIVERSES I WANT TO JOIN: Pokémon, Stardew Valley, and maybe Malé Rising (any Jonathan Edelstein fans in the house? xD)

Also I sadly don’t really have enough spoons to tag people for this, let alone twenty, but if you see this and find the questions cool, feel free to tag me as inspiration.

[script-a-world]

This only loosely falls into the theme of worldbuilding but it's worth asking anyway. How do you get an audience to treat fundamentally absurd ideas seriously? I'm devising a cyberpunk fantasy story which has many illogical and ridiculous concepts within it (such as a Mongol semi-nomadic khanate full of cyborgs centred around robotic horses, and a steel dragon that breathes superheated neon) but it's not supposed to be a comedy.

Bina: To encourage and maintain "suspension of disbelief," you have a few options. One is to just play it straight. Own it and show people you've thought things through. Showcase the real consequences and dangers of these concepts. Have your characters treat these absurd ideas seriously because to them, they are serious. If you show that you're treating your narrative tools seriously, readers are more apt to buy into them. Taking an out-there idea and going deep into it, expanding on it, making it feel real, is one of the draws of fantasy. For some, the more absurd and out-there, the better!

Acknowledging some of the ridiculousness might help too. Letting the reader know that you know things are ridiculous can make them more willing to buy into the nonsense. It doesn't have to be to a comedic effect. Just something to show the reader "look, I know it's pretty off-the-wall, but bear with me and I'll show you where this is all going."

(btw, a steel dragon that breathes superheated neon sounds awesome)

Tex: Absurdity is not restricted to comedy. As a genre, absurdist fiction often tackles satire, nihilism, and irrationality - especially in relation to the world the characters are interacting with. You've already picked out a genre - cyberpunk + fantasy - so the structure of stories in those genres will act as a guide for you, and presumably readers who would be attracted to your story will already be familiar with the notes of both genres.

There may be some dissonance between cyberpunk and fantasy, as the former is a critical look at society while the latter originated from oral history and folklore (so is inherently tied with society), but so long as the nuances of these genres are acknowledged, I don't see very many issues arising while plotting. As Bina said, the easiest way to encourage readers to take things seriously is to treat things seriously - what parts of your story are you considering illogical or ridiculous? Why? Just because it hasn't been seen before, or the particular iteration you've decided upon, doesn't necessarily mean that it'll be difficult for readers to accept.

You've already got a system of government with your khanate, and having your characters being cyborgs and robots and made of steel (in the case of your dragon) does not necessarily negate the khanate. You have two genres to lean on with your story: cyberpunk would focus on the breakdown of social order in your story due to technological advances, and fantasy would focus on the bending of reality to fit how magic functions in a medieval-esque society. How you choose to blend them together will give your story structure, as well as drawing readers to your story.

Internal consistency helps a lot with convincing readers of a thing's legitimacy and logic - no matter how nonsensical things may appear at first, so long as there's a consistent cause and effect, readers can be taught the nuances of your world. Plot helps a ton with this, because if x or y idea can further the story in a productive manner, it's more likely to be accepted.

Every classic genre and plot device was once new and absurd for a writer's audience, so it's only illogical if its only value is to be illogical - that would also mean it doesn't contribute to your story in a meaningful way, so you would need to consider what weight you're attributing to your ideas in relation to your plot, and how you plan on handling these aspects.

Further Reading 

 A Very Short History of Cyberpunk by Marcus Janni Pivato (PDF) 

Do You Have a Purpose? The Absurd in Literature 

Absurdity in Literature: Definition & Concept 

Saphira: To build on what Bina was saying, your characters are native to this. This scenario is not alien to them. It's as common law as gravity is to us- so showing us what your characters expect, or how they react to the world around us, educates us readers on how the world is consistent with itself. Suspending belief is not about "oh yeah, this could be real", it is about "oh yeah, this is real to them".

What might help is pinning down the core laws of the world you have built. For my novel, in which a planet is shattered and held together with magic, there were a few things I had to pin to get everything else to make sense. First, the world was dying. Second, magic was something that was flowing through the atmosphere, and thus anything that interacted with the atmosphere (breathing it, passing through it, reacting with it). Third, all the bodies of earth and water floated, unconnected, swirling around the core from where the magic comes. These three laws cannot be broken, because it would defy the world itself.

These laws allow me to explore thoughts like how does magic influence chemical reactions like fire? Or just as fun, what happens if you leave the atmosphere? Once you have these laws in place, do not consider yourself boxed in. That is not the purpose of them. Instead, you are grounded, like a live electrical wire. This makes your world tangible, and thus you can play with your character's expectations through their experience. Once you can do that? Well, playing with your readers and their expectations falls together.

Constablewrites: It might be helpful to think of your concept less as "absurd" and more as "surreal." A lot of times surrealism refers to a world that's ours but somehow off in a way that's treated as entirely normal, but it can still apply to more obviously SFF settings.

MareeB: Ok firstly this isn't a question that only loosely falls into the theme of worldbuilding, it's actually a fundamental worldbuilding principle. ie a question we should all ask ourselves when creating a fictional world.How to get people to accept a world with whatever is going on as 'believable' is a foundation problem and something I think we all struggle with from time to time.

You can make almost anything feel believable if you apply enough internal logic. If you're not already a fan I'd suggest checking out the works of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett. Both of those authors wrote ridiculously absurd concepts, and yes it was framed as comedic, but if you look closer there's rock solid world building in the consistency of details. And the portrayal of familiar human faults. The humanity of the characters, and how they react to the absurd situations makes the whole world feel believable.

Mod Miri Note: The team has added this topic for consideration as a future master post. It’s a good question!

[kuroari23]

I posted 1432 times in 2021

21 posts created (1%)

1411 posts reblogged (99%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 67.2 posts.

I added 743 tags in 2021

#gundam - 221 posts

#political - 85 posts

#tmr - 71 posts

#cat - 61 posts

#ali project - 61 posts

#yes - 61 posts

#arika takarano - 53 posts

#important - 44 posts

#goddess - 43 posts

#the queen - 43 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#i don't want to sound offensive (that's not my intention) but this isn't something that should happen in (anywhere) the first world (or what

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

So, Flay Allster gonna die soon, right?

1 notes • Posted 2021-01-11 01:49:51 GMT

#4

I started Gundam SEED, let’s see why many people hate it.

Btw I just finished Gundam 00 so...going from that to SEED is...well, the animation isn’t great but I’ll get used to. (It feels a bit mean to compare when a-Sunrise spent A LOT of money on 00 to make it look like that b-there’s a remastered SEED version

1 notes • Posted 2021-01-08 01:30:17 GMT

#3

*me trying to call God after Camil woke up, looked at me, did some movements like the child in The exorcist and went to sleep again-

2 notes • Posted 2021-09-13 01:00:20 GMT

#2

I may (will) take the 2 final exams of this semester next week. So....yes, I won't die but I'll sure cry.

At least one is about a foreign language (English, not suicidal enough to try any other) so I'll read some stuff starting tomorrow.

And there's this one where...10PM me sending a message to the group to know how the final is going to be like. We have half of the info.

3 notes • Posted 2021-06-25 01:46:45 GMT

#1

Cross out what you’ve already read. Six is the average.

Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen

Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien

Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte

Harry Potter series - JK Rowling

To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee

The Bible - Council of Nicea

Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte

Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell

His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman

Great Expectations - Charles Dickens

Little Women - Louisa M Alcott

Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy

Catch 22 - Joseph Heller

Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier

The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien

Birdsong - Sebastian Faulk

Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger

The Time Traveller’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger

Middlemarch - George Eliot

Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell

The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald

Bleak House - Charles Dickens

War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy

The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams

Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh

Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck

Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll

The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame

See the full post

5 notes • Posted 2021-11-12 01:24:21 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[jedi-anakin]

shirewalker replied to your post “you guys know any good sci-fi book?”

alienated by melissa landers. haven’t read the rest of the trilogy yet but I really liked book 1. she also has starflight, scifi as well but haven’t read it yet. the lunar chronicles by marissa meyer, plenty of scifi and fairytale retelling. got on my tbr the hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy by douglas adams and space opera by catherynne m valente (which is kind of eurovision in space!!)

I’ve seen alienated before, but I completely forgot about it, also the other book from her sounds good too, so both landed on my TBR!

I always wanted to read the lunar chronicles and now I might will, since that horrible publisher decided to publish the first two again, and the third, which they translated for three years. (btw only because heatless was a big success)

I’m not really interested in hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy, I thought I saw the movie, but turns out that was the parody. But space opera sounds so good! I mean eurovision and space? hell yeah!

[fibula-rasa]

You’re traveling through another dimension…

The place is New Jersey, the time is 2001, and the journey into the shadows that you’re about to read is my journey. My journey in committing myself to see every episode of The Twilight Zone.

I grew up watching Twilight Zone reruns on TV; loving the style, imagination, and colorful characters. In or around 2001, as a high-school freshman, I saved up to buy The Twilight Zone Companion by Marc Scott Zicree. It shocked me to learn how many episodes of the show I hadn’t seen after years of faithfully watching reruns and the bi-annual marathons.

Yes, this is that same copy of The Twilight Zone Companion.

Setting a goal for myself to see every episode, checking them off in the book as I went along, was a daunting task back then. Not only were there no streaming services, but also no complete home-video release. (For the longest time CBS Home Video only released collections of episodes in no discernible order on VHS and DVD.) On top of that, a few of the episodes were not in syndication. Praise be to Serling, my parents owned one of the compilation tapes that included one of these episodes (The Encounter). Of course, I then understood why it wasn’t in syndication… It has since returned to the airwaves for some reason.

In the end, it took me a little over a year to see all of them with the help of timed recording on my VCR.

I wasn’t lying about checking off the episodes...

It’s great that The Twilight Zone is now available on multiple streaming services in addition to The Scifi Channel still playing reruns. Now none of you need to have my single-minded dedication to seemingly pointless tasks to discover television shows that were cancelled forty years before you were born.

Over the next two days, in honor of the marathon, I’ll make a series of posts to help all of you make the most of your first journey into imagination of 2018.

Below the jump, you’ll find a little bit about each of my favorite episodes. That’s the signpost up ahead--

--your next stop, The Twilight Zone!

The Invaders

Season 2, Episode 15

Director: Douglas Heyes | Writer: Richard Matheson

A woman living in an isolated cabin spends a terrifying night with tiny spacemen.

Agnes Moorehead is undoubtedly one of the best and most under-appreciated actors of the last century. The Invaders is a great episode from a technical and stylistic standpoint, but Moorehead’s performance still stands out. What a wonderful stroke of genius it was to take a woman so known for her radio work, for her inimitable voice, and cast her in a role with no dialogue. It’s a testament to how well this episode is made that the titular invaders are honest-to-goodness hand puppets but it’s one of the series’ most tense and terrifying entries.

A Stop at Willoughby

Season 1, Episode 30

Director: Robert Parrish | Writer: Rod Serling

A harrowed Madison Avenue ad man, dissatisfied with his life, begins to dream about another, quieter life in a town called Willoughby.

Nostalgia is a common theme throughout the entirety of the series and this is examination of sehnsucht the best execution of the theme. Gart Williams (James Daly) isn’t wistful about his own past (as with the simpler, but also great Walking Distance). Instead he yearns for some nebulous summer in the late 19th century, some nebulous place in America, unknown to him but relaxed enough that he’d have all the time in the world to “live his life full measure.” James Daly portrays Gart as someone who is too tired to continue functioning professionally or personally. His turn to nostalgia is driven by depression and the exhaustion that depression always seems to have at the ready in its handbag.

Will the Real Martian Please Stand Up?

Season 2, Episode 28

Director: Montgomery Pittman | Writer: Rod Serling

When a UFO crashes into the woods on a snowy night, two state troopers track footprints to a roadside diner filled with bus passengers stuck by a bridge gone out. Will they be able to figure out who doesn’t belong?

Serling takes a classic mystery premise and adds a science-fictional spin with Will the Real Martian Please Stand Up? It’s a lively episode with well-limned character work. Serling loves karmic retribution, especially when it takes the form of a twist on top of a twist. This episode illustrates the concept in spades, though I won’t elaborate further in case you haven’t seen this one yet!

Where is Everybody?

Season 1, Episode 1

Director: Robert Stevens | Writer: Rod Serling

A man arrives at a small town with no idea how he got there or who he is. Unfortunately, there’s not a single soul in town to clear things up for him.

The origins of The Twilight Zone lie in a TV drama Rod Serling wrote called The Time Element (which is on the complete series home video release btw). That story certainly contains the necessary ingredients we’ve now come to associate with the show, but it’s with the pilot Where is Everybody? that Serling hammers out exactly how he plans to approach short speculative stories: Human dramas that often deal with the interior life of a person when they’re faced with extraordinary circumstance. Earl Holliman’s acting is often rightfully lauded as well as Serling’s writing. The camera work by Joseph La Shelle is incredibly artful for TV photography of the time, using camera angles and movement to reflect the feelings of the main character or to emphasize the feeling of being watched by an unseen observer.

Nothing in the Dark

Season 3, Episode 16

Director: Lamont Johnson | Writer: George Clayton Johnson

An elderly, fearful woman is faced with a conundrum when a young police officer is wounded on her doorstep.

I always marvel at how beautifully executed Twilight Zone episodes are that take place in a single cramped space with a small cast of characters. This one happens to be a meditation on the nature of fear and death in a basement apartment with an old lady and a young man. George Clayton Johnson is one of the first writers outside of Serling to write for the series and Nothing in the Dark proves he was very capable of handling the tone, style, and themes of the series. Gladys Cooper stars in a few episodes, but this is her most tender and heartfelt role. She has great chemistry with Robert Redford, who plays the ailing baby-faced cop.

The Hitch-Hiker

Season 1, Episode 16

Director: Alvin Ganzer | Writer: Rod Serling (story by Lucille Fletcher)

Nan Adams starts continually seeing the same strange man hitchhiking along the roadside as she drives across the country.

The original version of this story was a radio play written by Lucille Fletcher. In the radio broadcasts of the story, Orson Welles plays the lead. It’s worth a listen after viewing the episode both because Welles is an excellent radio actor and because of how much of the mood of the story in light of the gender swap. When Serling bought the story from Fletcher to adapt it, she did not approve of gender-swapping the protagonist. It’s an interesting point to reflect on. Stevens’ Nan is instantly vulnerable as a young woman traveling completely alone; a strange man maybe stalking her is a real and common danger. Her fear is reasonable and it adds to the anxiety of the gradual revelation that the danger may actually be supernatural. With Welles, a man with such an imposing figure (that comes through in his voice) so quickly disquieted by a random man along the side of the road instantly signals to the listener that there may be more going on than meets the eye (or ear). They’re practically telling two different stories.

And When the Sky Was Opened

Season 1, Episode 11

Director: Douglas Heyes | Writer: Rod Serling (story by Richard Matheson)

Three test pilots are hospitalized after a crash landing. One by one they lose their grip on their very existence.

Speculative fiction stories dealing with space travel in the early days of manned space exploration are such a treat. They’re a window into our collective fears about the speed of our move into unexplored territory; physically, theoretically, and philosophically. This episode wastes no time getting deep into the unexplained. Rather than starting with the crash, it’s a few days later and one of the pilots (Charles Aidman) has already disappeared along with any evidence of his existence; except of course for the memories of his colleague (Rod Taylor). And When the Sky Was Opened is also a great example of what my SO refers to as a “Weird, ain’t it?” episode, where you’re presented with a concept and not given any resolution.

It’s a shame Rod Taylor wasn’t in more episodes. He’s clearly tuned into The Twilight Zone’s frequency.

The Last Rites of Jeff Myrtlebank

Season 3, Episode 23

Director: Montgomery Pittman | Writer: Montgomery Pittman

When a young Jeff Myrtlebank wakes up at his own funeral, he’s not quite the same as he used to be.

Confession: when I was a kid, I hated the folksy episodes of The Twilight Zone. I didn’t relate to the oft idealized, fictionalized version of the American Middle West. I can’t say I relate to it exactly, but as I’ve traveled more and met a lot more people from the Midwest, the South, & Appalachia, I can appreciate it better now, albeit from a distance.

The episode begins with an homage to Mark Twain’s The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and then moves into an imagining of what would happen if the devil showed up in St. Petersburg. The musical cues are often a little over the top, but the performances aren’t. All the supporting characters are very realistic* and it makes Jeff (James Best) stick out all the more. Best will go from sprightly to morose to furious in a single scene. He does great work varying his voice, facial expressions, and posture to convey that he’s not quite Jeff and it’s genuinely scary at times.

*(note: not insultingly backwoodsy or prone to superstition as stereotypes might dictate)

Eye of the Beholder

Season 2, Episode 6

Director: Douglas Heyes | Writer: Rod Serling

A woman recovering from extensive plastic surgery is hoping against hope that the procedure will make her “normal-looking” so that she can have a regular life in her repressive society.

Technically, this episode is exquisite. The lighting and cinematography turn the plainness of a hospital into a ghastly limbo. The point of the story might be a bit overwrought, but the monologues are delivered by Maxine Stuart as Janet Tyler are powerful, especially paired with the acting she does with her hands. If you already know the twist of the episode, it’s a whole lot of fun to track how the director and DP work around the reveal.

While Maxine Stuart plays the role of Janet beneath the bandages, Janet is played by Donna Douglas of Beverly Hillbillies fame post recovery. Originally this was rationalized as the director wanting Janet to sound a certain way and look a certain way and it would be easier to cast by voice and looks separately then just dub the actress with the looks. Then, when Douglas showed up to film, she insisted she could sound like Stuart and, lo, she does.

I Sing the Body Electric

Season 3, Episode 35

Director: James Sheldon & William Claxton | Writer: Ray Bradbury

When three children aren’t coping well with the loss of their mother, their father tries out a new robot grandma service.

I Sing the Body Electric has a truly unique atmosphere compared to other Twilight Zone episodes. It could be that it’s the only story Ray Bradbury wrote for the show. It could be the edge of artificiality created by the lighting in many of the scenes. Or that the presentation of a loving man-made grandmother emerging from a void is more theatrical than usual. It’s likely a mix of the three, but it’s a strange one no matter. As the grandmother emerges from a void, she retires to a room of grandmother voices. It hints at an amazing AI concept.

Honorable Mention:

The Masks

Season 5, Episode 9

An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge

Season 5, Episode 22

The After Hours

Season 1, Episode 34

The Big Tall Wish

Season 1, Episode 27

[hypatiavex]

Is Dirk Gently's really that good?

I am sorry this post is longer than I expected but I am just reallt passionate about this show ashjdksoa

YES IT REALLY IS AMAZING!! Oh my god I don’t know where to start explaining the show like it’s sherlock on crack with a corgi! And I guess you watched the one minute-long video It’s based on Douglas Adams’ novels

And so the main character is Dirk Gently who is a holistic detective (wow shocking, it’s not like it’s in the title) which means he believes in interconnectivness of all things and he doesn’t use normal methods to solve cases like clues and shit but he just does whatever and the universe guides him and in the end he solves the case and he is the sweetest cinnamon roll

Then there’s Todd Brotzman who is also played by Elijah Wood (aka Frodo from Rinking of the three Lords…errr…I mean LOTR) and he is bellhop in a hotel and one day a man called Patrick Spring gets murdered in that hotel and poor boy(he is actually little shit but I him) finds him and then he is fired. Then he meets Dirk (or well Dirk climbs up to his apartment and breaks in through the window) and Dirk decides that Todd is his assisfriend and Todd…is not happy about it but uh well…

Then there’s Todd’s sister Amanda who has a disease called pararibulatis (not real disease) and basically she has hallucinations that feel real so she is idk suddenly on fire and it’s not great but uh nobody else can see it so yeah and she is always at home and feels like shit because she is too scared to go somewhere…like I could talk about her all day but I also don’t want to spoil stuff

Then there is my badass girl Farah who is an anxious mess but also can kick your ass and you would thank her. She is the bodyguard of Spring’s daughter (who is missing btw) and oh my god I love Farah. Like in the first ep she is just tied to a bed but trust me she is so amazing and strong and beautiful.

Then there is Bart who is another badass girl who is holistic assassin and basically that means whoever she kills deserved to die and basically she kills everybody who she meets except one boy -> Ken. Ken is now her friend/prisoner and is kinda freaked out. Also he is a hacker who normally works for shady people

AND LET’S NOT FORGET ROWDY 3 - they are crazy energic vampires(they feed on energy) and there’s actually 4 members of Rowdy 3 and they are sweethearts who destroy shit. Like everybody would love to hang out with these guys ahhh

AND THERE ARE GAY PRINCES AND BISEXUAL COP IN S2 WHO ARE AMAZING CHARACTERS AND ARE MORE THAN THEIR SEXUALITY

So basically this is stuff from the first ep and in the beginning it seems like a mess but in the end you find out that everything is acutally connected and it’s so good and it only has 2 seasons(and it got canceled :() and first season has 8 eps and second season has 10 eps so yeha watch it go please

Also the cast is just so amazing and Max Landis (the creator of the show) is really something like wow crazy like the show. And the fandom is also amazing? And friendly and there is no drama (or really small drama ok) everybody just loves the show and respects each others ships

[toongrrl-blog]

The Mommy Myth: Mouthing Off to Dr. Spock (Part Two)

Another guy who made a living lecturing Moms about how to raise their kids and how they knew it all despite not being Moms or even so involved with their own kids was Bruno Bettelheilm who had a column called “Dialogue with Mothers” in Ladie’s Home Journal where the scenarios describe him in a circle with imaginary dumb-dumb moms talking about their kids and their issues. Here are a few pieces:

One thought that she would give her jealous older child deal with the new baby arriving by giving him a picture of the newbie to throw darts at.

Moms in these set-ups were never right, he always was.

It ended in 1973 the column.

There were others: Joyce Brothers (Good Housekeeping) and Lee Salk (McCall’s), they told moms to always be calm and rational (easier said than done) and the worst she could do is lose her cool (very hard for Latina and Black mamas, let’s face it if you see your kid doing something destructive, you will freak) and they always recommended getting professional help (therapy isn’t bad but one can’t help but feel they were recommending them a lot). I always want to say that access to mental health care is impossible and a mess especially if you cannot afford them, health care is a mess in this country and we really are doing disservices to families with children and those with mental health issues. 

Of course Salk said the worst you can do is over psychoanalyze....once again Moms are either too much of this or not enough of that. His answer to one mother who had kids who liked to squirt each other with toothpaste was to “Before becoming critical of your children it is important to examine your own behavior”, some gaslighting huh? Isn’t he righteous Joan?

Oh yeah....also working moms damaged their kids’ self-esteem according to him, “I think that children who have working mothers may possibly feel that their mothers’ work is more important than they are” and could become defiant as they grow older (I’m sure teenagers with doting stay at home moms are defiant). Also reverting to baby talk “indicates some unfulfilled need” so that child needs undivided attention (BTW kids do that a lot) and how dare you leave your kid with a sitter and a kid cheating on a test is truly resentful of their parents? Also leaving kid with Grandma for a week while you and hubby go on vacay? Bad! Because, as Salk warned, the kid will turn away from you and become attached to Grandma (well kids get attached to grandparents a lot...) and become depressed and have bad behavior issues. 

I wanna note that the author of this post is in favor of date nights and nookie and what Bridget Jones called “minibreaks” for couples, I read that a man whose friends had parents taking the kids with them on date nights ended up divorced while his parents who had a special night for just the two of them are happily married. Also “me time” is crucial.

Womens Magazines didn’t know what to make of the Women’s Movement and their attacks on the Victorian image of Motherhood that put moms on pedestals (you know what they said about pedestals...) and took Gloria Steinem seriously for her remarks that housewife’s work had marketable value. Magazines told women that their skills for running bake sales can be used for fundraising and mediating kids during their fights would be suitable for human resources management and the magazines started taking stay at home moms’ loneliness seriously

In 1972, McCall’s featured an article titled “How to Go to Work When Your Husband Is Against It, Your Children Aren’t Old Enough, and There’s Nothing You Can Do Anyhow” by Felice Schwartz where she urged housewives to recognize the market worth of their skills: “You have run a home, which requires the combined skills of purchasing agent, time-study expert, dietitian, interior decorator, and personnel manager” and their experiences haggling and negotiating with plumbers, butchers, and the babysitter can “be translated into personnel work, sales, administration, or any other job that involves dealing with clients or the public”. 

In Ladies’ Home Journal, Letty Cottin Pogrebin (check out her work, she’s a sweet lady and fabulous) wrote a column called “The Working Woman” where she urged women to enter the workforce if they wanted to and wanted to be identified as more than so and so’s wife and mother and provided info about the first women to take on high-powered new positions and where to seek help should one encounter job discrimination. In August 1974, she interviewed children of working mothers and concluded “None of the children said they resent their mother’s jobs and none feel envious of kids whose mothers are at home” and in 1979 quoted psychologists who asserted there are not negative effects to be traced to Mom working. Some of these kids said learning to help run the house was fun and they liked being more independent, said they admired their moms, and daughters said they’d want to be working moms too. Contrast with a 1978 McCall’s article titled “How Children Feel About Their Working Mothers” where kids said they got mad when mom came home late from work, fights happening over that, and moms too tired to answer questions or play games. 

Letty Cottin Pogrebin was proud of her column where she reached out to women who wouldn’t read Ms. magazine and it helped initiate changes in households and she received letters of gratitude. “Here’s what jumped off the pages in this corner of the media: Mothers were in it together, and they needed to work together to help each other out and to promote policy changes, like a national day-care system, that would help all mothers”, Meredith Michaels and Susan J. Douglas.

Redbook magazine featured an article titled “Double Jeopardy: The Working Motherhood Trap” where two working moms talked about how important it was to compare notes and devise ways to balance home and career as they had no books or role models to turn to. This wasn’t to offer a rosy glow of working motherhood or put it down but to discuss the good, the bad, take them all and then readers would have the facts of the life. They dealt with employers that wanted them to prioritize the job before the kids (reminds me of Hustlers when Ramona asks her retail manager to have get out early to pick up her kid and he said he never needed to worry about picking up his kids because he had someone to watch them while he was at work), or that they were unnatural mothers for wanting to work and they wrote for hopes of part-time work for both parents and long maternity leaves and equal pay. 

Another article titled “Someday I’d Like to Walk Slowly”, the magazine brought 12 young working mothers to talk and compare notes with Bess Myerson (first Jewish Miss America from 1945). The women worked because they didn’t want to be financially or emotionally vulnerable and if you worked you enjoyed more equality in the home. They talked about the huge efforts it took to get husbands more involved in the household and sometimes they had to leave chores to the wayside and there were articles insisting working made moms better parents with one former stay at home mom of two kids confessing she “gained 70 pounds and...was watching 8-10 hours of television every day” and figured that when she quit work, she forgot about her needs in service of her family and “this self-sacrifice was unhealthy and unnecessary” and realized to be more patient as a mother, she needed time away from her kids. 

By 1978, McCall’s was offering $1000 for “Working Woman” stories that reflect problems, conflicts, and opportunities confronting women who worked outside the home. In “New Ways of Taking Turns” Jane Adams talked about groups of working mothers in different cities who set up collective grocery shopping groups and even one for errands and car pooling for Little League and appointments. There was even one article about four single mothers who shared a house with a recent divorcee looking for a roommate which allowed them to save money from their paltry salaries and hire a sitter for all the kids and share in food preparation. 

Now I have more from the authors of this book:

What is so striking about these various articles is how they gave voice to the experiences and concerns of everyday mothers, and provided the reader with a range of different attitudes and reactions to identify with. Here we heard mothers wrestle, explicitly, with the norms of intensive mothering, regarding many of them as unnecessary and overly demanding, yet getting pulled into their riptides through the specter of the hurt, lonely, damaged child. Some mothers cried when they left their children at day care for the first time; others didn’t cry at all and, in fact, couldn’t wait to drop the kid off. Some felt guilty about working; others believed it made them better mothers. We saw mothers going through their own thought processes and sometimes reaching dead ends: solutions that simply weren’t going to work. So they tried again, and found another solution. Because these magazines so actively invited mothers to submit pieces about their own experiences, there were also articles by older working women whose kids had grown up just fine, putting the lie to the work-equals-ax-murderer equation spouted by Spock, Salk, and others. There was no one, all-commanding opinion of the expert, no “I’m-the-best-mom-in-the-world-and-you’re-not” pap from some actress. So, for a brief time in the media, there were multiple personas for mothers to connect to, try on, reject. And, in these features, mothers were doing things, trying things: active agents in search of solutions. They forged ahead, together.

The Feminist Movement gave women the permission to speak their truths about their own experiences, even if it tipped over sacred cows, which led to more mouthy mothers being depicted. In the 1976 “A Bill of Rights for the Mother Person” had conceded that there was a taboo against discussing negative experiences with motherhood and the most taboo reaction was anger but “anger is inevitable” and normal and Moms would lose it with one mother confessing: “When Sarah bit me yesterday, I kicked her and said, ‘You dirty little animal.’” Moms talked about the noise of living with children, how they were mentally fatigued, always felt guilty, and like they lost their sense of selves. Lynn Caine, author of the bestseller Widow where she encouraged single moms to do what it took to take time out of the house on their own and told off the discrimination against single-parent families, who were considered “broken” and not invited to outings with traditional nuclear families. 

Maternal humor pieces admitted raising children was not always spiritually elevating and was a antidote to the idealized families on television. Georgia Lee Cox wrote “Confessions of a Wicked Stepmother” where she married a man with four children and stated she was always afraid of children and now she knows why. There were jokes about spanking, stuffing pillows in their mouths, and martinis and when one sibling fought with his sister and said to his stepmom “I’ll die before I’ll play with her” and she answered “Prepare to die then” and got a martini. Judith Viorst (she wrote Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day) wrote “The Confessions of a Mean Mommy” where she proposed telling a kid to clean his toys up by warning: “You are inches from death.”

In 1975, One Day at a Time, premiered on CBS and starred Bonnie Franklin as single mother Ann Romano who moved to Indianapolis with her two teenage daughters. Ann dealt with a low-paying job, power struggles with her ex husband, her teenage daughters’ feuds, and the come-ons of building superintendent Schneider. There was also the film Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore (1974) which starred Ellen Burstyn (who won an Oscar for her performance) where Alice’s abusive husband gets killed in a car accident and she had to fend for herself and her young son; they head out for Monterey so she can resume her old singing career and had this reaction to her son’s laments of boredom: “Well, so am I. What do you want from me, card tricks?” This was spun off into a sitcom called Alice where she and Flo (”kiss my grits”) challenged their boss’s sexism to his face and behind his back. Good Times offered a portrait of a struggling African-American family with the (later widowed) Florida Evans who was loving but offered one-liners to her children and husband. ADLHA and An Unmarried Woman (1978) featured their suddenly single mom heroines meet cute and supportive men who wanted to make them happy (like Stan Rizzo and Peggy Olson, I miss my late boyfriend) and then The Turning Point (1977) where Anne Bancroft and Shirley MacLaine were peers in ballet unit Shirley got pregnant and had gotten married where Shirley’s daughter aspires to be a ballerina while Anne is aging out of the profession. The implication being that you could age out of a career but never motherhood (what about when the kids leave and don’t call you on the phone?), probably got Karen to have Holly.

Then came the Supermom figure, as featured in the ad for Enjolie perfume where the mom shimmied singing “I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never, ever let you forget you’re a man” which just added another narrow ideal for real and flawed women to make themselves sick to fit into. Oil of Olay targeted mothers going back to the workplace (or starting there for the first time) where they brought up fears of aging and competing with young people out of college (trivializing the too-real issue of women seeking work after 40).

By 1979, with the inflation and the Soviets invading Afghanistan and the Iranian hostage crisis left mom’s issues on the wayside and Kramer vs. Kramer starring Meryl Streep as Joanna Kramer, wife of Ted and the adorable Billy (soon to be Molly Ringwald’s bratty brother in Sixteen Candles), who leaves them for the other side of the country to find herself. The film revolves around Ted, probably for the first time, learning how to bond with his son and become involved in his life and left no sympathy for Joanna (who spent seven years of child-rearing and we never see what it was like to be trapped with a kid and a group of catty moms from his class, ever notice that stay-at-home moms or school mom groups seem to function like the Plastics?) who came back with a career and wanting to claim custody of Billy. Before I head into the 1980s media panics, I will leave the authors’ conclusion to this chapter here:

Tearjerker movies, mouthy moms on sitcoms, kid advice columns all exerted their pull on mothers, showing them how to thumb their noses at intensive mothering while reminding them that rejecting intensive mothering meant their kids would be screwed up forever--and would blame them for it. But there were two camps, especially in the early 1970s, and feminists had pointed out that putting intensive mothering all on the mother prevented female equality with men. The kid shrinks said that mothers who failed to read and study everything---especially the shrinks’ own columns and books--were in danger of producing a future generation of permanently scarred psychos or deeply pathetic, unloved wretches. Advertisers, often paving the way, had a solution: be a supermom. Embrace feminism and intensive mothering. This was not quite what feminists had in mind. But this was exactly the fusion--between two ethics impossible to reconcile---that the media, and millions of mothers, began to go with as the Gipper took the helm. 

[thehumanarkle]

Don’t join the SF Debris forums

I love Chuck’s show, but he made a huge mistake in making this guy who calls himself Fixer a moderator. He has now banned me from the site for refusing to not call people who say racist things racist.

Yes, really. He previously barred me from the thread on the 13th Doctor because I dared point out that some people had sexist reactions to it.

After a temporary ban, issued after I pointed out that a user who openly supported Joe Arpaio’s pardon was supporting the pardon of a racist, I came back and said straight up that if someone is being racist, I’m going to point it out. This was what Fixer did to that post.

Keep in mind, the people who openly support ending DACA and the forced deportation of people who have done nothing wrong (i.e. ethnic cleansing), they’re all still there. The people who defended Joe Arpaio’s history of racial profiling? Still there.

Also keep in mind, that by removing my entire post and replacing it with that, Fixer has falsely presented himself as the hero. This enabler of racism, the man who is a-okay with other users calling Black Lives Matter thugs, but calling someone racist is “just rude and breaks the rules” has taken control of the narrative. I can’t respond to that. My original words, where I make it clear that I don’t think I should be punished for daring to point out that racism is bad, are removed and by doing so Fixer gets to paint himself as the reasonable adult.

Don’t let him get away with it. If you are on that Forum, quit. If you’ve been thinking of signing up, don’t.

Go ahead and keep watching Chuck’s show*. In fact he just finished his review of the BBC adapatation of Terry Pratchett's Going Postal, and he had some interesting things to say on the subject of adaptation. And don’t blame the other moderators either. At least one, and I am blanking on his name and feel awful about that, was openly on the side of anti-racism on the forums.

But sadly, much like the TGWTG forums before this, and the View Askew forums before that, it’s another case of a fan community being ruined by a small but toxic element. Racists and misogynists have enough platforms on the Internet. Why did they have to have this one too? :(

BTW, below is the post that got me in so much trouble. A bit harsh? Maybe, depending on how you feel about being so blunt in pointing out racism. I’m personally not big on using softer terms like “racially insensitive,” though I can see that sometimes it’s called for. But a week-long ban (turning into a permaban when, two days after it ended, I remembered to log back in)? Really? Also, it’s not like I was hounding the guy. I say up front that I have him on Ignore and only see what he’s saying when other people do quote-replies. That’s pretty much the exact opposite of hounding. That’d be calling me a stalker for BLOCKING someone on social media. Becuase stalkers are well known for never ever wanting to get e-mails from or see the faces of their targets ever again, right?**

Oh, BTW, that pic in my signature is a GIF of Christopher Plummer in The Sound of Music, tearing apart a Nazi flag.

Addendum: Join the Facebook group instead. Yeah, there are some jerks there too, but none of them have Moderator priveleges. https://www.facebook.com/groups/200494943352125/

* Or if you haven’t, start. CW: Some of his earlier videos have some seriously problematic language, but he himself cops to it and has almost entirely purged it from his lexicon. He even addressed how cringeworthy he finds his own earlier work in his review of the Stargate Atlantis episode “Irresistible”.

Some personal favorite reviews to recommend:

The ENT: Dear Doctor review and accompanying video on the Prime Directive

The Dragon Age Origins Review/Let’s Play

His mini-series on the life and works of Douglas Adams

The VOY: Bliss and Shattered reviews (where the inspiration for A Fire of Devotion came from)

Rise & Fall of the Comic Empire

The Hero’s Journey: The Making of Star Wars: A New Hope

** This actually did happen to me back in 2005. Takes some gall to accuse someone of stalking you when they’re actively trying to avoid you in your mutual circles. :/

[mrrrzetta]

On Winter Temporary Fandom (WTF) Combat, russian Dirk Gently fans and abscence

(top left: IDEAS, right: time left for another deadline, bottom: Team WTF Dirk Gently 2017)

So this is what my life was since February, I think. I fell into fandom black hole and survived. I’ve seen the things you wouldn’t believe! And, yeah, we fucking solved it all. The battle ends today. Am I free?…

So WTF Combat is this sort of Big Bang-multifandom-fest-thing in russian internet community, takes time every year (there is bigger version of it at summer), lots of talented people are envolved. I take part in this almost every year, but my gosh, I can’t tell how huge this was with our little crazy Dirk Gently team this time. We were truly amazing. People talk about us and start watching show because of us! And the amount of content we produced? Oh. My. God. You’ve probably even read about some of our ideas now and there, here on tumblr fanbase. And we were unique. Okay, so on WTF there is this structure of levels - representation of your fandom, small texts, big texts, Teen and Mature art, “special quest”, etc. Well, it’s all doesn’t need to be connected, except we are Dirk Gently fandom, OF COURSE ALL OUR LEVELS AND WORKS WITHIN THEM ARE CONNECTED. We had actual case inside them all! And all pieces are mixed up, so readers need to connect them! But it would take too long to explain in full detail.

And since it’s all sadly in russian and hardly will ever be translated, I’ll try to just pinpoint my favourite bits of this combat.

There was obligatory crossover with Sherlock BBC, in wich Dirk is another lost secret Holmes brother (and his real name is Rosencrantz, I shit you not)

Translation of The Obligatory Beach Episode™ by princessparadoxical (hello). It was lovely, btw, everyone like it.

Crossover thingy about how little Amanda and comic!Dirk have met.

AMAZING cracky fic about Todd and Dirk going back in 2009 and meet young Dirk whos working as actual fortune teller at the back of some London bar (and hates it with all his heart).

Obligatory Doctor Who crossover, in wich it turns out Dirk and Todd were the ones who broke TARDIS and destroyed the universe at the end of series 5 (not intensionally). The Doctor was pissed (that was mine fic actually).

Obligatory Hitchhiker’s Guide crossover.

The whole series of drabbles about Dirk and Todd investigating disappearances of many cats in others fandom universes.

THAT ONE RIDGELY/CIA HAPPILY LIVING COMMUNE THING. First it was 4000 words text! Then it was WIP about Dirks and agent R first kiss! (with mystery squad and CIA making bets on who’s gonna kiss who, not so really secretly). And then there was this Valentine’s day bonus about Dirk working as Ridgely’s kissogram! Do you realise that this is the whole separate universe about this all now existing? That we invented absolutely new character to ship Dirk with and we now love him like the show's ones??

Translation of The series bible for Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency by Landis. It was a Big Deal.

Fic about Bart killing million Wilsons in all parallel universes.

Selfcest fic about Dirk and Svlad (here: dark version of Dirk from another dimension). WE LOVE SVLAD, he’s like part of a family now to us. Or the dark side of our chat group (with R as a good side of our chat group).

Yet another great 17000-ish words fic about case with the old living soul-eating vampire hotel and disappeared ghosts! Amazing portraing of Dirk and Todd friendship, spooky supernatural shenanigans, interesting explanation of Todd’s pararibulitis, lots of detective’s BLOOD.

Translation of  Boring BORING sex by inkyfishes

Very touching fic dedicated to birthday of Douglas Adams (with our gang coming into our reality through Max’s laptop as through a portal, scaring him almost to death, and then visiting Adams’s grave).

A gigantic fic where it’s all finally come together and mystery squad stop actual Apocalypse and collapsing of all dimensions. There is several alternative Dirks (from 2010 show, book, Svlad). There is a fucktone of crossovers with EVERYTHING. It’s glorious and terrifying.

You do realise that it’s only small part of all.

As to me - I have really outdone myself. I intented to do just a couple of Teen rated arts, but actually I have

made them! A LotR AU one (will post it eventually) and moodboard to fortune teller Dirk fic I mentioned earlier.

Wrote this Dorctor Who crossover, it was rather neat.

Wrote most of Ridgely/CIA stuff

Wrote big chunk with nsfw stuff for our big cracky collective fic wich is litteraly Aliens Made Them Do It trope at it’s finest.

Wrote 10k fic about Dirk and Vogel (well, Rowdys), with hint of Dirk/Martin? With M raiting (for strong language and violence)?? When it was intended to be small and Teen? I’m actually really proud.

Made nsfw Faranda art!!

Wrote reviews on M-rated works of others teams, never done this before.

Haven’t found time to write down my epic CIA!Dirk AU, eh. Now I’m feel mostly exhausted but pleased. We really made every fan of Dirk Gently proud, even they don’t know it yet.

I’m gonna sleep for a whole week straight and then will start posting some of arts from this insanity of Fandom Combat. Thank you all.

[tripstations]

Summer vacations put an end to rampant desktop crimewave • The Register

Something for the Weekend, Sir? I’m drowning in ballpoint pens.

I mean this figuratively, of course. Let’s just say I have an uncommonly large number of ballpoint pens available for my immediate use at the moment.

How many? Ooh, several. Can you borrow one? No, get lost, find your own.

The reason I suddenly find myself awash – figuratively, again – with so many writing implements is due to a temporary change in circumstances. Yes, I have moved house by 700 miles but that’s not the whole story. The determining factor in producing my present proliferation of pens is that I have moved to a country in which everyone else is absent because they’ve gone on holiday for the whole summer.

Having no colleagues with whom to rub shoulders – figuratively or literally, I really don’t care any more – for two months means there is nobody around to nick my biros, or as I now have to learn to say, “mes bics”.

This at least is the explanation offered by health ‘n’ safety software developer protecting.co.uk, which has been quoting research on the extent of casual office-supplies pilfering. “Workplace theft costs businesses in the UK £190m per year,” it says before whipping out a calculator (hopefully not someone else’s that they borrowed off their desk eight months ago and forgot to return) and confirming that’s an average of “£12.50 worth of items per person – the equivalent of almost 30 rolls of toilet paper each!”

Note: it is standard form to conceptualise lengths by comparison with London buses, surface areas by football pitches or Olympic swimming pools, larger land areas by the size of Wales, and the value of office supplies by toilet rolls. The managing director at my very first job used to complain that stealing toilet rolls from the office bogs ought to be an instantly sackable offence, and I still can’t bring myself to disagree.

Prior to reading this research, I had wondered whether the Douglas Adams theory of ballpoint disappearance might have some validity. Mme D’s workplace was even worse than mine: at her’s, the average HEPPA (Half-life Existence Prior to Physical Absence) of any writing implement at the front desk was 6 minutes and 37 seconds.

On one occasion, she rounded up every unwanted ballpoint, felt-tip, fountain pen, crayon and school pencil we could find around the house – a clutch of about 20 items – and took them into work the next morning. By lunchtime, not one of these was still on the premises. But rather than slipping quietly off-world or into another dimension, they were simply getting nicked by co-workers and, as I think CCTV would confirm, her own notoriously ill-equipped boss.

Evidently there are some advantages to the elimination of your colleagues from the workplace. Computer automation does not nick your pen. Nor does it run off with your sticky notes, pilfer your stapler or treat limited toilet paper supplies with rampant profligacy.

Not that I want to see a permanent end to all human life at work: obviously my own contribution is absolutely essential and cannot be dismissed so wistfully. Everyone else can go, though, no problem.

There is a gentle irony in the way the general public, despite its increasing preference for online retail, self-completing digital forms and push reminders, believes that live computerised services are, or should be, constantly monitored by human overseers. Nor is this expectation restricted to domestic consumers and retail environnements, apparently. A HackerOne survey conducted during Infosec a few weeks ago suggests that even security professionals believe humans remain more effective than machines when it comes to securing digital assets.

If you’re reading this, you will already be aware that automated services aren’t overseen by humans at all. In fact, most of them are a law unto themselves. Any human element exists only in order to fix them after they have already gone mental, which they do typically every 6 minutes and 37 seconds.

Of course, you might only be made aware that things have gone wrong when you see a flag pop up or receive a message from the system itself. Automated systems have automated monitoring. But this only works thoroughly if someone has thought of all the potential scenarios in which problems can manifest.

System’s gone down? You will certainly get notified about that immediately. System is having difficulty? You might see an amber warning if you’re looking at the right screen. System is randomly playing silly buggers with a single component, such as an undocumented script that an ex-colleague, long since made redundant, wrote one Thursday afternoon to show off his skills to a subsequently unappreciative project team? This could remain a secret between the automated service and the automated monitoring system almost indefinitely.

Just over a year ago, I visited the Museum of Roman Antiquity in Nîmes. This fabulous place was full of the digital toys with which all modern museums are fitted these days, one of which was a mixed-reality space that dresses you up in virtual clothing from the classical era when you stand on the footprint graphics on the floor. Mme D and I duly pratted about in front of the camera, pretending to be Roman consuls and slave girls and so on (Mme D made a great consul, BTW) and repeatedly pressed the button to send us screengrabs by email.

Nothing turned up in my inbox, not that I really expected it to work. Evidently there was a glitch with the system and, this being France in the summer, anyone who might have been around to fix it (while not otherwise engaged stealing each other’s pens) was on holiday. It wasn’t a significant system glitch, anyway, and I supposed someone would deal with it when they got back from the beach.

Except they didn’t and eventually I forgot all about it. I was only reminded of my virtual toga-twirling when a dozen screengrabs from the museum suddenly landed by email yesterday. It’s easy to imagine what happened: someone on stand-in support duties this week was probably still brushing sand from between their toes when quite by chance they happened upon a system flag indicating that 15,000 non-essential emails dating back exactly 12 months were still sitting in a Drafts folder, accompanied by a “Delete?” confirmation prompt.

I imagine this person was reluctant to trash 15,000 unsent emails that had been addressed to customers, and probably also frustrated at the system’s equally stubborn reluctance to send the bloody things. So I further imagine the kindly human consulted the technical documentation and followed its advice to the letter: switch the email server off and then back on again. Bingo – er, “houpla” – 15,000 emails containing photos of idiots dressed up in unconvincing AR as wonky Roman legionaries are turfed into the ether all at the same time.

Click to enlarge (but do you really want to?)

Job done, this helpful human was then free to spend the rest of the afternoon trawling colleagues’ desks for unguarded pens.

I like to think the days of pen shortages is coming to a close: real-time trackable “smart” pens are surely soon to hit the market, putting an end to the misery of losing a 50p biro by convincing dullards customers to part with a “smart” one costing £500. To get in early on the highly lucrative stylus-tracking bandwagon, I am registering the domains yourpenistracked.com and seewheremypenis.com.

Premature? Nah, you have to grab these things with both hands.

Youtube Video

Alistair Dabbs is a freelance technology tart, juggling tech journalism, training and digital publishing. That survey quoted by protecting.co.uk says 81 per cent of the employees they asked admitted that they didn’t regard “borrowing a pen from a colleague long-term” as a problem. It’s only borrowing if you give it back, pal. The toilet roll, though, you can keep. @alidabbs

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