#This is why magic is a metaphor for being gay

[gaiussleechtank]

Deep down, I partially disagree with how a lot of fans portray Merlin and Arthur pining after each other.

Merlin and Arthur realise their feelings for each other completely differently.

For Merlin, it is a fearful, lonely, devastating and earth shattering realisation that consumes his mind and leaves him clinging to the wall he's fallen against. He can feel it with every breath he takes, the heavy weight that fills his chest. How every action he takes is for him.

And as the days and weeks and months progress after realising so, his love becomes a part of him, so entwined with his being he wouldn't know who he was if he didn't love Arthur.

That's how no one discovers the truth, they see a loyal and devoted friend. No one even thinks to consider that Merlin might feel this way, because to them Merlin has always acted the same. And that act, is out of love and devotion everyone takes as loyalty and belief. There is no difference.

Sadly, his love for Arthur joins the silent secret of his magic being skillfully hidden in plain sight. Just like his magic, he eases his feelings alone. He lovingly gazes at Arthur in the early morning before he has to wake the man up, when it's just the two of them. He voices his feelings under a whispered breath whilst collecting herbs in the silent forest. He explores just how far his feelings go when he prevents assassins and evil conspiracies.

He realises, alone, that with every breath he takes, it will be to serve Arthur. Since he loves Arthur because of who he is. And who he is is because he loves Arthur.

And he will die with that secret, blooming in his chest, unspoken on his lips, unheard of even in death.

For Arthur, it is as sudden as a shooting comet. He knows that the way he feels towards Merlin is different than to how he feels with others.

And when he finally voices his feelings to his friends, they help him understand that what he feels isn't deep friendship, but instead pure and innocent love. Unlike a shooting comet, his feelings stay and burn stronger with the understanding of his feelings. He grows as a person more and more as he understand his relationships with people. Relationships that, as a young boy, he never was taught to understand: friends aren't meant to use you as means to improve their status and family is not blood that holds impossible expectations.

Finally after far too many years of thinking that the bards were crazy with their sonnets of love he can finally understand how the lovers feel.

Arthur takes his feelings for Merlin in stride with eagerness he hasn't felt in years. He embraces it with open arms. It's only a matter of time before he figures out a way or a thing or a set of words that he can give to Merlin to make him too understand the love he feels.

[beauspot]

Thoughts on my second watch of Good Omens 2

i heard the fly buzzing in my first watch but didn’t know why and now i know

Maggie my sweet darling angel baby i love you

Aziraphale turning their car yellow

crowleys “no more dying” in extreme scottish.

Disposable Demon i’ll save you from these awful people i promise 😭

Aziraphale’s little smile when he says “smitten” to Crowley

i wonder if crowley was especially hurt because aziraphale seemed to be able to forgive gabriel who tried to kill him but can’t seem to forgive him being a demon.(still seeing all of this as a metaphor for internalized homophobia, like aziraphale knows he’s not the perfect angel he wants to be and he’s projecting his feelings about that onto crowley)

I can’t believe we got an actual ball. like pride and prejudice, bridgerton ball.

the beautiful score that started playing when aziraphale brought the chandelier down

i didn’t even realize that when they walked in the outfits changed. mrs sandwich made me realize(also i love her)

Nina being the only one to question the weird magical shit Aziraphale and Crowley do sends me so bad.

Season 2 took everything i liked about the first season (aziracrow, queer subtext, gay people, archangels, and beelzebub) and expanded on it

The adorable smile on Aziraphales face when he asked Crowley to dance 😭 he’s so pure(i should have known something was up, everything was going too well)

Crowley saying i won’t leave you on your own and Aziraphale saying i know 🤒

why isn’t aziraphale able to miracle nina and maggie??

crowley and mrs sandwich flirting. too cute

crowley saying he’s neither nice nor a lad.

crowleys little run in heaven when he’s following muriel

maggie giving the middle finger to the demons and laughing in their face when they tried to belittle her. queen

defensive aziraphale is so badass. just because he’s soft doesn’t mean he can’t stand up for himself or the people he loves

the random guitar solo in the final episode theme is so bizarre to me. why is it there?

ahh the raining hearts symbolizing crowleys vavoom plan!

crowley’s heavenly outfit not being white but “light grey”

the relief in aziraphale’s voice when crowley came back 😀

also him mumbling about the halo like he did with the sword 😭 but he sure loves to boast about the things he’s done right to crowley

aziraphale and crowley doing magic together has the power to set off alarm bells in heaven and they barely tried, they’re just in sync

saraqael was such a good addition to the cast.

crowley smiling at aziraphale going off on the angels and demons

“where beelzebub is, is my Heaven.” 🥹

the little knowing look after crowley mentions alpha centauri

the way they just interrupted michael’s speech by leaving 😭

i think that aziraphale was about to ask crowley to move in but that’s my opinion

the look the metatron gave crowley is so strange. i don’t like that

“JUST US. NOT YOU.”

“You’re not helping, angel.”

the softness in aziraphale’s voice when he talked about making crowley an angel again? how can you hate him! he thought he was doing the right thing!

also the miscommunication these two have is completely out of hand because crowley asked aziraphale if he said no and aziraphale hadn’t given an answer AT ALL to the metatron. the metatron told him to take his time. he went back to tell crowley the news first.

crowleys confession makes my stomach hurt. the way his voice broke when he said “we’ve spent our existence pretending that we aren’t.”. the way he had to force himself past his anxiety to tell aziraphale he wanted to spend eternity with him? fuck.

the way aziraphale tells crowley to come with him. like and through all of this they are losing each other, oh my god.

“i need you!” god aziraphale punch me in the face next time why don’t you?

i feel like in all this anger towards aziraphale a lot of people are ignoring that he put himself out there too. he was telling crowley he needed him just like crowley was

“no nightingales.” FUCK YOU GAIMAN

the way aziraphale touched his lips after. dear GOD. someone get michael sheen an emmy

seeing aziraphale struggle against his wanting to kiss crowley back and his fear and wanting him to come back to heaven further supports my internalized homophobia analogy

also even knowing the kiss was going to happen because of the spoiler it still didn’t quell my shock. nor did it ruin the scene, i think it actually surprised me more because it did not happen how i thought it would.

side note i saw some people saying they thought the kiss was going to be a cop out in some way. like a body swap or as a joke and i don’t really know why?

it just occurred to me that both aziraphale and crowley thought the other one was just doing that thing they do where they say they won’t help, or they’re on their own but they eventually come back not knowing that the other was completely set on these plans they had. this wasn’t like armageddon or saving gabriel.

the second coming…of jesus…

crowley cutting off “a nightingale sang in berkeley square”...i’m gonna jump

this being the ending for the next 3-4 years. oh.

[fandomfaeofveryfewf4cks]

I'm curious, (and I want to use the fancy poll thing). To the Merlin fandom: what sold you on this show? Not necessarily what made you start watching, but what made you keep watching and join the fandom?

[sexy-sapphic-sorcerer]

1: Magic is a Metaphor < 2: Morgana is a Lesbian < 3: Merlin is Gay > 4: Arthur is Bi

Again with the whole metaphor thing, Merlin's entire character is about having to hide his identity and wishing that he could be free to be himself so that he wouldn't have to lie about how much Arthur means to him. So that's all very gay, but he's also just very queer-coded generally. There are so many jokes about him being more effeminate or wearing women's clothing, most notably in this episode where he dresses in full drag and then takes the opportunity to shamelessly flirt with Arthur. Unhinged.

Basically every other character seems to just assume that he's gay, at least towards the end, because Gaius and Arthur are in utter disbelief that Merlin would be 'seeing a girl'. And of course he isn't, he's actually sneaking around with that druid guy, leading Arthur to question how courting a girl would leave him 'walking with a limp.'

I also think it's very interesting how often Merlin has to pretend to be attracted to women to avoid people discovering his secret, like with Gwen in Series 1 or Morgana in Series 2. Or this scene, where Gwen and Merlin are the only people not affected by the Lamia's seduction charm and they're trying to figure out why. And Merlin says, 'it doesn't affect you because you're a woman'. And firstly, Gwen is like, 'so what?' So, bisexual queen. And then Merlin says, "it only affects men," and Gwen says, "so then why haven't you fallen under her spell?" And Merlin is just like, 'oh shit, I don't know. I can't think of any reason why I wouldn't be seduced by a woman.'

Now, you might be saying, "but Merlin is attracted to women! what about that one female love interest he had for literally one episode who immediately died?" Oh, you mean:

I'm sorry to all of the Freylin shippers out there, but this was so clearly just the writers' last-ditch attempt to make Merlin straight. If you think about it, Freya also 'has magic' if you catch my drift, and that is the only thing that she and Merlin have in common, and the only thing that they talk about. And if you look at their dialogue out of context, it really doesn't seem like it's magic that they're talking about. It's just gay/lesbian solidarity. Also, never forget when Colin Morgan accidentally referred to Merlin's potential love interests as "him or her." So who else could he have been thinking of?

Merlin definitely had a crush on Lancelot. From the moment that they first meet, he just keeps going on about, 'omg, isn't Lancelot so strong and brave and chivalrous? God, I hope he becomes a knight, he would look so good in a suit of armour.' And then he says to Gwen, completely unprompted, "so just for the sake of argument– Arthur or Lancelot?" Why are you thinking about that Merlin? Then that scene ends with Merlin and Lancelot getting drunk and stumbling home together and waking up the next morning having shared Merlin's single bed. So take from that what you will. I don't necessarily think that anything happened between them, not because I think Lancelot is straight, don't get it twisted, just because I think he's a fucking virgin.

But certified pansexual manwhore Gwaine on the other hand, oh they definitely fucked. And it's a very similar situation to Lancelot, Merlin's only flirting technique is just to find some buff guy who's just saved his life and be like, 'oh my god what can I possibly do to repay you? Maybe you could come back to my place and I could tend to your wounds and then we could go down to the tavern, have a few drinks'.

And it works. Merlin literally used his job as apprentice physician to the Knights of the Round Table as his own personal Grindr, and i love that for him. But, of course, these are just side hoes to Merlin's main bitch, Arthur.

You can deny everything else that I've said, but you cannot deny that Merlin was in love with Arthur. And don't even try to say, 'but it's just because it was his destiny'. Because, yeah, like that's any less gay. They're two sides of the same coin, destined to be together, Merlin 'uses magic only for Arthur'. Come on.

Also, it's pretty clear that Merlin cares about Arthur more than he cares about his destiny, throughout the entire show. But it culminates in this scene in series five where, because of very contrived plot reasons, Arthur has to choose between legalizing magic and saving the life of Mordred. And Merlin convinces Arthur not to legalise magic so that he will let Mordred die. He literally enables the genocide of his own people and condemns himself to a lifetime of suffering just on the off chance that he can spend a bit more time with Arthur.

And if that isn't heartbreaking enough, of course, every action that Merlin makes only confirms Arthur's fate. And after he very platonically dies in Merlin's arms, as dudebros do, what does Merlin do? does he go back to Camelot and live a full happy heterosexual life? Of course not. No, he spends the next one and a half thousand years just waiting at Arthur's resting place, waiting for the day that Arthur will be resurrected and they can be together again. What the fuck kind of Greek tragedy, Achilles and Patroclus level shit is that? That is fucking gay.

[ohnoitstbskyen]

The weirdest thing to me about League is that for some reason in a pool of amazing characters my brain latched into Lux of all people. Why? Who knows but I want her to leave Demacia and hunt down Nocturne and meet people who grew up with magic and accept her as she is and she learns through these experiences that she has to return home and really take a stand.

Why Lux. Why did it have to be Lux and not... idk Veigar or smth

Lux has a compelling story - not an especially original one, but a compelling one, built on compelling tropes.

She's this sheltered girl raised in privilege, who should have every reason in the world to simply embrace her fortune, go with the flow and live as her family wants her to. The Crownguards are more than capable of protecting her from the persecution that Demacia heaps on every other mage and magical creature, and more than happy to, so long as Lux lives up to the family name.

And yet... she can't do it. First of all, as she grows up, she becomes ever more sickly aware in her soul how inhuman the treatment of mages is under Demacian law, the brutality and oppression that is leveraged against them, all to prop up the legitimacy of the government. Second... she doesn't want to repress her magic. She has a light inside of her which is intrinsic to her being, a true and natural extension of who she is, how she exists in the world, and pushing it down and denying it is painful. She is full of curiosity about it, and eager to see what she can do with it, but she cannot be both a free mage and a Crownguard.

Lux is, in other words, a queer trans nonbinary lesbian genderqueer aroace gay gay gay homosexual gay. Or, to be less flippant, in her story magic is an extremely apt metaphor for queerness and how to navigate being queer in a bigoted environment.

It also works for other things, of course, there are other reasons to feel stifled and trapped by the rules and restrictions of society or by the demands of your family. Lux could also be a secret socialist, and the oppression of mages could reflect the way the bodies of the proletariat are abused to build capitalist state power - or you could read it as a theme of neurodivergency in a world that is still run on a lot of eugenicist logic. Although to be perfectly frank with you, if Lux is cishet, then I am a honey badger, her magic power is literally rainbow lasers.

So there are themes there, there are things to relate to, to hold on to, to be carried away by. There's a lot of great characters in League of Legends, all of which deserve better than to be owned by Riot Games, and Lux is one of them.

Also, her best friend is a building-sized himbo dragon statue which comes to life when she uses her magic around him and gives her friendly life advice while musing about how much he wants to punch kaiju in the face, which, like, I don't know how to NOT be charmed by that.

[its-your-mind]

This is a call to action for all the PJO girlies (gender neutral) that I know are sleeper agents on this webbed site

Go read Trials of Apollo. Go do it. Do it right now.

I know what you’re thinking. “Tbh I didn’t love Rick’s writing towards the end of Heroes of Olympus” “There’s no Percy so why bother” “All of the Argo II crew are kinda OOC” and listen my friends. You are so valid to have those opinions. I felt the same way after Blood of Olympus. But listen to me. Look at me.

Now that you have had some time away, you must give these books another try. For me. For Uncle Rick. For the demon baby grain spirit who is only able to say his own name (Peaches).

Do not worry friends, I do not expect you to read just based on my say-so - I also provide:

A list of reasons why you (yes you) should go read the Trials of Apollo series right now gogogo:

(Spoiler warning - all broad plot things that you learn early on, but I know some people (including me) avoid that shit at all costs)

All the chapters are titled in bad haiku. Ya know that one scene in Titan’s Curse where Apollo just starts reciting apropos of nothing? That’s every chapter title. They’re all so bad it’s amazing.

Apollo is so up his own ass about everything, and it’s so cool to experience the same world through the eyes of someone who is not used to being in amongst the chaos

Oh yeah the plot. That’s a reason to read it.

Okay so

Basically Zeus continues his streak of being a shitty shit parent and decides to blame like… every bad thing that has happened on Apollo, and punish him by turning him mortal and enslaving him to a demigod girl named Meg who is a garbage gremlin with a little demon baby guard named Peaches (see above)

And like the A plot is they gotta save the oracles from shitty old Romans who wanna take over the world (stop me if you’ve heard this one before)

But like the B plot is about what it means to discover that you’ve fucked up, you’ve made mistakes, you’ve hurt people, and you gotta fucking own up to that shit

But also

You do not deserve to be punished for every horrible thing that has ever happened because of you, or even around you, and when a parental or authority figure in your life tells you that, they are an abuser and they are wrong

And yet

It can be so hard to fully separate yourself from them. Because for so long, they were all you had.

But that’s okay, because when you start to learn that the people who were supposed to care for you and love you were not actually doing that, there are people around you who will love you, who will support you, who will pick you up and hold you close and make sure you know that you are okay

And they can’t fix you

But they can give you the safe space to fix yourself

hmm that was an essay about themes and metaphors BUT THATS WHY YOU SHOULD READ IT

also there’s a wikipedia arrow who only speaks in Elizabethan prose (in all caps)

OH ALSO ALSO you get to see Will and Nico being a CUTE AS FUCK couple in the first book. Nico smiles. Also makes skeletons grow out of the ground when people annoy him. Fuck I love this little gay death boy so much.

AND. You get to see so MANY of your old friends. And they still! Get! Plot! And! Character! Development!! Even though they are only there for a little bit

OH OH OH there are two old lesbians who run a halfway house for people who are tangled up in magic shit with nowhere else to go

Did I mention Peaches? I did. He’s my favorite.

OH ALSO. This is “unreliable narrator” executed SO FUCKING WELL. Like, all narrators are unreliable. But Apollo used to be a FUCKING GOD. He has not had to deal with the reality of death all that much. He’s used to people praising his name and bowing down at his feet. But that ain’t happening!! And he is Unhappy about that!! But it also lets there be such a clear juxtaposition between what Apollo believes about himself and about the world and what is really true, which is such a wonderful way to write about recovery from trauma.

Ahem

Anyway it’s just real good Uncle Rick continues to knock it out of the park but he just did something different and we (at least I) needed some space from OG PJO fan brain before I could appreciate how fucking awesome this series is.

OH OH OH and if you like audiobooks Robbie Daymond (hello CR mutuals - yes, this is the one who is our beloved Blue Boi who we (Orym) so desperately need returned) is the audiobook narrator and he is. So fucking good. Absolutely NAILS the dramatic-ass-inner-monologue of this dramatic ass ex-deity. Also nails all the other voices as well. 15/10 audiobook narration I’m lichrally gonna go listen to other books JUST cuz he reads them.

okay why the fuck are you still here. GO. GET THESE BOOKS. If your public library does Libby you can absolutely get them on there. GO FORTH.

[gay-disabled-characters-showdown]

LGBTQ+ Disabled Characters Showdown Round 3, Wave 2, Poll 6

A character being totally canon LGBTQ+ and disabled was not required to be in this competition. Please check qualifications and propaganda before asking why a character is included. 

Check out the other polls in this wave and prior here.

Eda Clawthorne-The Owl House

Qualifications:

She has a magical chronic disorder which has flare-ups, is mitigated by taking medication (potions), and has similar side effects to many real disorders such as fatigue, greying hair, and physical impairment (drains magic, a natural ability of *most witches). Unlike in other stories however, her condition is NOT ever completely cured. It does evolve and become more manageable over the course of the story, but she still experiences symptoms from it. Eda also loses one of her arms later in the story. She does get a replacement hook, but it is never shown whether she has a functional prosthetic or not. Most likely, she only has one fully functioning arm after this. As for being queer, she is in a relationship with a nonbinary person and is all but confirmed bisexual (has a secret box with the bi flag on it seriously why else would she have this). Also the owl house has a Lot of queer characters in it and I mean. just look at her. I would be surprised if she wasn't queer somehow.

Bisexual, and has a curse that affects her day to day life

Bi & lost arm and has a chronic illness metaphorically

Propaganda:

Has canonically dated both men and a non-binary person. Her curse affects her ability to use magic (and at one point outright stops it), which is very important in witch life. Said curse also causes her body parts to fall off sometimes. Many have said her curse is like a metaphor for depression but really it's more like a magic version of a physical disability (although I wouldn't be surprised if she actually also had depression).

Uuuuh she’s great and stuff idk I can’t propaganda well sorry

Ballister Boldheart-Nimona (Flim)

Qualifications:

He has a boyfriend (and then they have a sort-of-breakup but they're back together by the end) and he has a prosthetic arm.

He’s gay and missing an arm.

He’s explicitly gay, in love with a man. He loses his arm then builds himself a prosthetic while on the run like a badass.

His boyfriend cut his arm off :( he uses a prosthetic now.

His arm got chopped off after being falsely accused of killing the queen, he spends the rest of the movie with a prosthetic metal arm. His arm was also chopped off by his lover, Ambrosius Goldenloin, during said false assassination.

His boyfriend cut off his arm

Canonically has a boyfriend and built his own prosthetic

Qualifies by both being canonically disabled (amputee) + canonically gay

Propaganda:

Please plz plz vote for him

His boyfriend cut off his arm. He made himself a prosthetic. He used his arm to block someone’s sword. He kissed his boyfriend. He has sad wet cat eyes, which isn’t relevant but still. He has them.

He’s so GOOD even though he’s having like the worst day ever (specifically talking about movie but webcomic also applies). He has the biggest wettest eyes how can you not root for him????

People love him! He kinda looks like a sad, poor little cat. A real soggy wet kitten man.

Let's see. He and Ambrosius are lovers, or at least boyfriends, from the moment they're introduced. Ballister gets his arm chopped off by Ambrosius during the false assassination. Ballister spends the rest of the movie trying to convince Ambrosius and the kingdom of his innocence, with a metal arm replacing his missing one. It originated the phrase "Arm Chopping is not a love language!" Did I mention he's a main character too?

Is a science nerd, built his own prosthetic arm with his non-dominant hand, accidentally adopted a trans chaos demon of a 1000yo being

A knight, Nimona's best friend and father figure of sorts, but the plot mostly revolves around him- Ballister is framed for murder and has to hide while trying to figure out who framed him and how to prove he's innocent. Nimona becomes his sidekick (he didn't want one, she just showed up at his place one day like a very chaotic stray cat) and together they form a great duo against the corrupt government. This is complicated by Ballister's ex Ambrosius, who accidentally cut off Ballister's arm and is a bit brainwashed by government propaganda. Oops. You should watch Nimona it's great 💞🦈

The qualifications and propaganda paragraphs correspond, @foulfirerebel is the fifth submitter, and there were at least 7 others.

[ishouldgetatumbler]

Why is hisoka here?

He's a murderous pedo with super powers who never dies and is present in every arc. Writing a story is making a series of choices, so why make the choice of including this character and writing him this way?

While Hisoka connects with hxh's broader themes of humanity being conflicted, a mix of highs and lows, his main function I feel is rooted in storytelling.

In the most basic shonen story structure, a (young, male) character steps into a world of magical adventure, where their innate specialness allows them, through grit and willpower, to achieve their dreams.

Hisoka exists as a counter to the fantasy of one's specialness.

You can learn skills quickly? Hisoka can learn skill instsntly.

You want to win at Heaven's Arena? Hisoka is already undefeated there.

You're a kid. He's a grown up.

The same licence that means you can adventure without worry means he can kill without consequence.

The same power that you can use to protect yourself, he can use to hurt you.

Shonen is fundimentally mostly about being a shark in a sea of minnows. Putting you in the place of someone special and powerful, surrounded by lesser characters. Some may take work to overpower, and some may be out of reach right now (think of whales in the ocean metaphor), but no matter what all will ultimately fall to our protaganist's quick wit, iron will, and gay friendships.

Hisoka exists to ask the question: What if there was another, bigger shark? Would you still want to be in the ocean?

From there, Hisoka's actions and desires snap into clear focus: he must be obsessed with the struggle of equal power so he does not immidiately devour our protaganist. that leads to another obvious question. His obsession is framed as deeply erotic, in an otherwise asexual story stucture. Why?

Many shonen feature "sexy" women, but none of them are as unrepentantly sexually and physically agressive as Hisoka. His sexuality exists in a pocket of sexual horror that Togashi loves to draw from in hunterxhunter. The nudist lobotomy of pokkle, the human pets of the chimera ants, Tsrreidnich in general. Consistantly, sexuality is invoked during the of violating of body or mind.

Hisoka is supposed to exist as the ultimate counter to the shonen fantasy: a young boy fighter encounters a pedophile turned on by fighting. He is the logical anthesis to the fantasy at the core of shonen

[bisclavret]

on any other tv show the scene where gwaine not-so-subtly admits to merlin that he protects him because he's in love with him would be thee scene everyone points at like omg look a real canon bisexual person in my queerbait show! but because bbc merlin did so much gay shit that was both barely subtext but also never actually text to THIS day everyone (me included) still gets kinda confused about the one (1) explicitly gay scene that got past the 2012 censors like "wait wait what. gwaine saved merlin the exact same way he saved a woman he wanted to sleep with (and did) and then just in case that wasn't clear he went ahead and used context-specific phrasing to spell out to merlin that this is why he's so devoted to him too? because he wants him in the same way? there's no other interpretation? he just does it and acknowledges it and that's that? and we can't pin it on some other factor like a prophecy or duty or a magical metaphor? the entire scene exists to spell out that gwaine has romantic and sexual feelings for merlin? are we sure???" meanwhile gwaine has just been sitting there being canonically bisexual and in canonical love with merlin for over a decade wondering if people are ever gonna retain this information

[mai-komagata]

re: sexy stabbings

im writing this very long meta on how galadriel x sauron and silvergifting dynamics help an audience recognize different forms of seduction in a relatable way (including queer forms of seduction, which audiences are normally blind to), and how recognizing these ships isn't about "crack shipping" but about the text using the language of sexuality/eroticism/seduction to convey concepts that would otherwise be vague and not-understandable like temptation to a metal object or wounds that cannot heal or possession by an alien being as well as concept of "men in a fantasy/magical/superhero setting are not just power levels" -- ie. the strongest man should always win. Galadriel is *integral* to this because most characters in tolkien are male and audiences are pre-disposed to ignoring emotional dynamics in men other than anger and violence -- the contrast with a female romance lets an audience be like "these people, adar, galadriel, celebrimbor are more alike than distinct". (wow maybe i don't need to write it, anymore!). But since that is taking me very long to write and i keep running into queer-erasure every day i'll just say this: the reason we don't see Sauron torture Galadriel in the same way she tortures Celebrimbor is not because his relationship with them is cosmically different (obviously its different bc they are different people). Galadriel is not more "pure" or "loved" than Celebrimbor. Neither is blameless (i.e. both were ambitious) and neither is deserving of torture (nobody deserves that, even Sauron). It's because there is different symbolism to the way they are being hurt. Arrows being used as martyrdom is a millennia old way of showing homosexuality. Stabbing is metaphorical of penetration. He intended to kill both of them for denying them the Nine. Because Sauron is bad at impulse control, he takes and believes he is wiser than he is. If he wants something he will take it and then regret that he broke his favorite thing. (note he doesn't regret killing other people he doesn't twistedly love, like mirdania, or the orcs).

Galadriel had Nenya (i.e. Celebrimbor's magic, untouched by sauron) and Elrond was able to save her (love and light win the day). Celebrimbor died as symbolic for what happened to Eregion (he was alone and eregion fell).

This doesn't mean BOTH scenes aren't meant to be erotic. The stabbing is hot and the caressing of the arrows are hot. But they are hot in a BDSM/noncon way. "Do you understand what it's like to be tortured by a god?" sorta way.

Pragmatically, though, the reason we don't see more graphic galadriel is because it would make audiences uncomfortable. You can be way more graphic with gay shit and people won't be squicked than if you are graphic with m/f abuse. As i said, a good 50-70% of the audience won't even NOTICE the gay shit and think its just standard fantasy violence. The closer you make it to outright rape, the less compelling it is, because Sauron needs to both be APPEALING and EVIL in order to understand why people are drawn to the rings of power and why it is essential to oppose it.

[disclaimer: this is not anti galadriel x sauron, it is just in favor of seeing the ship in a dark way as part of the larger narrative. When I talk about shipping them in a dark way i don't mean simply its my kink, i mean this is a dark seduction story at heart. The actors are very hot, their acting is very sexy, but the function in the larger story is to display the different ways sauron tempts and corrupts people, including galadriel, celebrimbor, adar, and how sauron himself was corrupted by melkor].

[that-ari-blogger]

On Grim Spectacle and Greatest Fears

There's a reason Enchanting Grom Fright is beloved by fans of the Owl House, not only is it just a plain old good story, it's also a phenomenal queer story.

But why is that so, and what makes it so important? That's what this post is about.

And if you're wondering whether I'm going to talk about @moringmark in this post, you bet I am.

Let me explain.

SPOILERS AHEAD

If you look at online discourse, there is a lot of discussion about "good representation" and that is certainly an interesting discussion, but I don't think there is much explanation as to why representation is important in the first place. It is a good thing, we all know this, but why?

One word: Normalisation. Representation of varying identities, cultures, and ethnicities is important because it takes apart the implicit bias inherent in society.

The generic individual in western society is white, male, and straight, and while there is nothing wrong with these character traits, this means that anything added to that template becomes a statement. It becomes an important metaphor for the story which doesn't get applied to someone with the three characteristics I mentioned earlier.

For example, there is a question in analysis of what a character being gay does for a story, where a character being perceived as straight doesn't get that level of scrutiny.

This is a problem for a number of reasons, most notably it abnormalizes certain traits that a large proportion of society (myself included) exhibit, effectively othering those people as a result.

Representation does the opposite of this, it allows real people who are not the generic individual to be treated with the same level of respect and for audience members who don't usually see themselves in media to find characters like themselves, to see their own stories reflected in fiction.

I think the best reason for representation actually comes from Ordinary, by Joriah Kwame, the sequel to Little Miss Perfect. This song, written explicitly from Luz Noceda's perspective, says this:

"The characters I read never act or look like me I can't depend on them to lead me through the right door"

Stories are a way of learning about the world and yourself, and in stories with extremely low representation for marginalised people, that lesson is pretty clear.

@jameswoodall has a video essay on YouTube titled How Much Representation Is Enough. In it Woodall discusses the benefits of representation through a queer lens, and argues about the end goal thusly:

"It's not about achieving a certain percentage. It's about making that percentage stop mattering. When queer representation is no longer noteworthy. When queer inclusion is so naturally assumed that nobody feels the need to count anymore. When even if we did put queer rep in every story, nobody would bat an eyelid. Because we have just as much right to be there as anyone else."

So, let's talk about Grom.

Meromorphic is a channel with a two-hour long video about The Owl House as a whole, and while there is a lot in that video that I disagree with (as is the nature of media analysis) it is comprehensive and fascinating, and I would recommend giving it a watch.

However, I am not bringing up that video to talk about its points, instead, I would like to shamelessly steal borrow a term from it: Magic Literalism. In this context, it means when a piece of media uses magic to make physical an intangible concept. In this case, it turns fear into a monster, that being Grom.

When Grom looks into Luz, she sees Luz's mother, and she sees Luz's fear of disappointment. She sees that Luz has a secret that she hasn't told her mother in case she breaks her heart. It's literally about the Boiling Isles, but there's something written between the lines here.

It is possible to read this as Luz's fear of coming out to her mother, and by "it's possible", I mean that this is how I read this.

Coming out is terrifying, even if you have supportive parents, it's still asking people to accept a part of you, and that comes with risk, because if they don't accept you, what do you do?

That's what I think Luz is afraid of.

Amity, on the other hand, is afraid of getting rejected in a similar way, although hers is more direct. Amity is scared of falling in love and not being loved back.

As a side not, I think it's a really cool detail that of Odalia's many flaws, homophobia isn't one. As in, Amity isn't afraid of coming out to her parents, and when she makes passing remarks about having a girlfriend to her mother and father, their surprise is that it's with Luz, not with another girl. Bellos kind of keeps this going, and the message with that is clear. Homophobia is too low, even for these villains.

Anyway, Amity's experience with Grom is the other side of being queer, the romantic part. I am aware that romance isn't something everyone experiences, but when you do, especially when you are queer, confessing your feelings for someone is terrifying.

So, Amity avoids the question and doesn't really confront it directly at all. Even at the end of the episode, she has everything thrust upon her and still doesn't confess. Luz does the same thing with her mother. Fear is a powerful force, and I would argue that the best time to deal with it is when you are ready, not before.

I really like the scene in the forest. The light gives the two a feeling of warmth and safety, and it wards of the night. Once again, it's Luz giving hope to those around her, and here it is in a more personal sense. Light, do not falter.

The colour palate of the scene (that warm light) conveys that these two people are comfortable in each other's presence and can talk freely around each other. They are already in love; someone just needs to say it.

However, there is another side to Grometheus that also factors into being queer. When Amity explains the event, the art style changes into this style that I want to call classical, even though it probably isn't (art nerds, rise up in the replies and tell me what this is please). But she also directly calls the Grom event a tradition.

"Every year it tries to break out and a student has to defeat it before it invades town. Ever the optimist, Bump holds a party and calls it tradition."

Perhaps tradition, at least in the Boiling Isles, isn't all that it's cracked up to be. Perhaps there is an issue with seeing a problem and instead of trying to fix it, stalling it and making a spectacle out of achieving nothing. Maybe there is an issue with willingly putting children in danger for the drama of it. Maybe the fact that certain sports are just the audience enjoying people getting life threatening injuries might be an issue. I'm just throwing ideas out at this point.

If we link Grom with fear, there is the idea that fear spreads from schools and it is the role of the students, as decreed by the adults, to contain it. See the plot of Footloose for an example of this, or certain places in the real world today, where fear of the other (mainly bigotry) takes the form of arguments about schoolbooks.

This is a valid reading, but I'd like to go a bit wild with my interpretation and talk about @moringmark's comics.

Chapter three of A Little Hint of Blue is a brilliant piece of storytelling that actually characterises Bosha a ton. It carries the theme of fear over to both Skara and Bosha, but it shows them in real time. Skara is scared that Bosha won't let her spend time with... (*checks notes*)... Fledermaus?

She has good reason for this, Bosha is overprotective to the point of toxicity and runs on her own fear. Bosha's hierarchical worldview comes from a place of fear as well, she's afraid of being out of control, and a really subtle thing that gets done in this comic is the association of Bosha with fire.

It doesn't really get done in the original series, but Bosha and fire are such a neat thematic paring. They both consume, they both try to reach out, and fire is heavily associated with strong emotions, like anger and fear.

Bosha tries to control everything in the same way she controls her flames, but as it turns out, people aren't fire. People, when they are free, don't immediately destroy things, and a lot of people actually benefit from that freedom. Most notably, artists and musicians, like Skara.

Grom Factor also deals with the subject matter, but from a slightly different perspective.

First up, the most obvious, at least to me. Enna saves the town but it outcast in the process because what she is scares people, despite her heroism, she is not accepted. The metaphor isn't perfect and reading it as a one-to-one analogy is a detriment to the story. For example, the reason for Enna being outcast is because of a curse, and queer people are generally not magically cursed to be queer, they are born that way.

But, there is also the idea of Luz's fear as an adult being the exact same as when she was a child. She is scared of disappointing people, specifically her family and her daughter. This means that she is acutely aware of Ayzee's own mirror of that, and this line is spectacular:

"Make yourself proud"

It's ok to be afraid of what others think, that's part of being human (or a witch, or a demon. It's part of being sentient), but in the end, the only person who you have to make proud, is yourself.

Final Thoughts

I've been dying to talk about the Moringmark comics, and I do plan on talking about them more, but that will happen when I get there. I will do more gushing about their serious artistic and storytelling skill when that happens, so buckle up.

Enchanting Grom Fright is one of my favourite episodes of the series as a whole, and its a testament to the writing of it that there is more that I am yet to cover, and more that I am discovering as I watch it. For example, the storyline with Gus and King is a big part of the episode, but I didn't mention it because it wasn't really relevant to my main point, and the whole thing with the dance is stellar.

Next week, I am looking at Wing It Like Witches, so stick around if that interests you.

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[pumpkinmetaphor]

I just wanted to ask because im new here. But what IS the pumpkin metaphor?

In the context of Ouran, I'm referring to the carriage metaphor in Episode 21: Until the Day it Becomes a Pumpkin!

Kaoru talks about this metaphorical Cinderella carriage that will turn back into a pumpkin, symbolising when this liminal space of the host club magic ends.

In a wider sense, I end to gravitate towards pumpkin metaphors in media. Pumpkins often symbolise childhood (Halloween, pumpkin patches, fairytales) and can be a stand in for children, naivety, innocence etc.

Homestuck uses pumpkins similarly in that the existence, or lack thereof, of pumpkins symbolise something in relation to a character's relation to children or childhood. In a series about the liminal space of adolescence within a world destroying game that will result in the repeated deaths of you and everyone you care about, the losing of pumpkins and constant "pumpkin? what pumpkin? you're not sure there ever was a pumpkin" becomes pointed. eg. Jake appearifying pumpkins and basically living in a pumpkin patch is almost a Peter Pan complex, he's adamantly opposed to growing up and "becoming a man."

I could go into more detail but this is my Ouran blog haha.

Anyway the pumpkin carriage in Ouran does also represent that to an extent to me. Tamaki shows up and yoinks the twins out of their vicious childhood, puts everyone in this pumpkin carriage. But Kaoru is the one afraid of it turning back. I'm on mobile so I'm being a little vague here, but I think episode 21 does in some ways represent Kaoru believing Hikaru is the one who can grow up, Kaoru will be left behind when Hikaru wants to move on without him. And this is like this fear Kaoru has not even of growing up, but of the carriage turning back into a pumpkin and him not being able to grow up. And he's left there, forever changed, with that pumpkin. What happens then?

I guess that's a pretty common gay experience! I definitely remember watching that episode when I was 12 and being like wow. I don't know why this is hitting me so hard. This idea that there is some aspect of adulthood that is unobtainable (heteronormativity) and everyone is going to grow up without you because you can't keep the performance up. There's a difference in you and some day everyone's gonna figure it out!

Anyway that's the pumpkin metaphor to me anyway

[verathena14]

Fellas, is it gay to give your bestie your family heirloom when they get scared of a meteor shower as kids and hold up a wooden sword and swear you'll always protect them? Is it gay to be overcome with feelings of jealousy when said best friend starts hanging out with a girl? Is it gay to joke about sharing a magical fruit with him that means your destinies will be intertwined? Is it gay to open the door to darkness when he draws a picture of himself sharing THAT SAME fruit with the girl you're jealous of? Is it gay to realize that you fucked up and sacrifice yourself to save your best friend and the girl he likes because you know it's more important that he's happy? Is it gay to spend an entire YEAR watching over your comatose best friend while his memories get repaired, and say multiple times "everything is for Sora"? Is it gay to see someone who, for some reason, appears to look like your best friend (xion) and stroke their face? Is it gay to give up your form and take the body of the person who manipulated you into falling to darkness in the first place to help your best friend wake up? Is it gay to avoid him even when he looks for you, saying "there were some things [riku] couldn't tell sora. it had always been that way" in a VERY closeted-gay manner? Is it gay to have your best friend fall to his knees when he FINALLY finds you and cries "i looked for you! i looked everywhere for you!" after he just shared a very awkward hug with the girl he supposedly likes? Is it gay to throw yourself in the way of a devastating blow, earning yourself a scar and probably chronic pain in the process? Is it gay to sit with your best friend in LITERAL HELL and say you'd be fine there as long as you're together? Is it gay to UNCONSCIOUSLY CHANGE YOUR ENTIRE SPECIES to protect your best friend in his dreams? Is it gay to have a conversation with Hunchback of Notre Dame characters about "having to keep things from the outside world, at least until you have time to figure them out" (THIS IS A METAPHOR FOR BEING IN THE CLOSET)? Is it gay to have your combined hearts' song be called "dearly beloved"? Is it gay to think of your best friend as your light? Is it gay to parallel LITERALLY EVERY DISNEY COUPLE UNDER THE SUN? Is it gay to refer to your best friend as your "taisetsu na hito" (roughly translates to "precious/ cherished person" or "person I love most") and say that your "doubts and fears are gone" and your adoptive father (michael mouse. dont ask) tells you "perhaps it's because you've finally found that special strength to protect the things that matter (the JP line is taisetsu na hito; the english translators made it very no-homo)"? Is it gay to sacrifice yourself again for your best friend? Is it gay to call out your best friend's name when you're about to collapse and see him FALLING FROM THE SKY and stare at him with the BIGGEST HEART-EYES EVER? Is it gay to have your souls form a giant rainbow-colored sword with a giant heart at the top? Is it gay to care so much for your best friend that you let him go save the girl (who's dead now oops) that you still think he likes because you're too oblivious to realize that HE LOVES YOU BACK IDIOT? (tbf tho neither of them realize it; sora's goin thru some major comphet)

Is it gay to have SO MUCH gay subtext that someone can make a 6-hour video essay about why you're homosexual?

[txttletale]

Do you have any videogames with strong narrative and story elements you'd be willing to recommend?

sure. i mostly care about games on the basis of their narrative and story, as far as i'm concerned the best gameplay is whatever complements that. here's my top ten:

pyre, by supergiant games

pyre's story is incredible. it's about people who've been exiled from society, and the things they build in exile, and whether society was really worth all that much in the end. it makes you make really genuinely difficult choices--i once deliberately threw a fight in this game because one of my party members asked me to--and it embraces failure as a mechanism by which the story can be advanced instead of ground to a halt.

disco elysium, by ZA/UM studios

if you've followed me for any period of time you've probably seen me talking about disco elysium. it's a masterful work of magical realism, it's melancholy and bleak and hopeful. it's about communism and cryptids. it's about all these things but it's nominally about being an amnesiac detective investigating a murder in a bleak post-soviet city that's been ransacked and occupied by international capital. and it's also very funny

heaven will be mine, by Worst Girls Games

heaven will be mine is about gay sex. it’s about other things but mostly it’s about gay sex. it’s about transgender lesbian mecha pilots fighting and fucking each other in their big robots which are metaphors for body dysmorphia and self-image and violence and hopes about the future. it genuinely reckons with the sci-fi genre and what it represents. every ending is a good ending because the characters will not let even the worst disaster be a bad ending.

hypnospace outlaw, by Tendershoot

hypnospace outlaw makes you a forum mod on a simulated early-2000s internet platform that you can only access in your dreams. it’s less about a linear narrative and more about getting to learn about characters through the strange and oddly intimiate things they post on their webzones. if you’ve met people you care about through the internet it will resonate with you.

paradise killer, by Kaizen Game Works

paradise killer is a murder mystery with no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ answer. don’t get me wrong, there’s an answer to the mystery--it’s possible to conclusively identify the murderer. but you can also walk into the trial the moment the game starts, accuse the obvious stitch-up suspect, present the circumstancial evidence you’ve been handed by shifty players, and get him sentenced. the game won’t stop you. imagine if instead of funelling you towards getting the ‘right’ answers in order to progress, ace attorney all hinged on what evidence you chose to present and how. the game won’t stop you from being wrong! figure out the truth yourself, or don’t bother--you’re an immortal blood cultist cop, you won’t be the one suffering the consequernces of your mistakes.

the beginner’s guide, by Davey Wreden

the beginner’s guide presses you up right against the wall by your lapels and demands: why are you playing this? how do you interact with art? what can you say about an artist from their work? is it right or fair to say anything at all? is the way you engage with the things you love healthy? it’s best enjoyed blind so i won’t say anything other than that--but it made me cry.

if not us, by ubq4

a tragedy that will pulverize you. interactive fiction about the aftermath of five doomed heroes failing to save the world. does really interesting things with IF gameplay to convey different emotions and perspectives. made me cry more or less the entire time i played it. beautiful prose delivered perfectly.

dujanah, by Jack King-Spooner

a surreal claymation genre-mashup story about grief and death. dujanah is looking for her dead husband and child in a world that’s sometimes whimsical and sometimes nightmarish. the shifting dreamlike atmosphere makes this game’s political points more pointedly and acutely than any amount of gritty realism could. there’s nothing else like it

cultist simulator, by Weather Factory

this isn’t a narrative linear game--it’s a roguelike card type thing, but it creates such a rich and textured world with an economy of writing that is absolutely fucking mindblowing. a few sentences at most are dedicated to any given topic, and put together they weave an incredible tapestry of the first interesting ‘cosmic horror’ setting to be invented for what feels like decades. (nb: the main writer of this game, alexis kennedy, stands accused of some pretty slimy shitty stuff--so be aware of that and look into it before playing it, probably)

suzerain, by Torpor Games

suzerain is a visual novel cleverly disguised as a strategy game. it’s not about moving armies around a board or building units or planning out cities--it’s about playing the character of anton rayne, newly elected president in a pseudo-Eastern European country caught between superpowers. the only good game about politics, you’re really forced to juggle multiple different allies and enemies at once, decide which political hills to die on, or risk being assassinated, couped, or invaded. if you like political intrigue and drama, this is where it’s at.

honorable mentions: Transistor (Supergiant Games) and Shadowrun Hong Kong (Harebrained Schemes)

transistor is a game with fascinating themes and a flawless sense of tone. its world feels so vivid and unqiue, and the ideas it plays with are fascinating--but ultimately i feel like it’s more style than substance. that fucking style though, unimpeachable. shadowrun hong kong on the other hand has a fairly weak narrative but some incredibly well-drawn and interesting characters and the rare totally (for me at least, ymmv) succesful integration of a pre-established backstory with freeform character creation.

[shiroikabocha]

you know as long as we're dissecting s2 frame-by-frame I'm gonna be pedantic about something that's bothering me and that something is firearm safety

or rather the egregious lack thereof, which I understand is the point of the scene but GODDAMNIT

I can't even focus on the multiple gay meanings of this line because AZIRAPHALE. PAY ATTENTION. WHAT is past your ear right now? Sure, whatever, you're handing a loaded metaphor gun to the one person you trust more than anyone in the world not to hurt you and it's all very symbolic and meaningful but LOOK BEHIND YOU.

the bullet is a metaphor for trust and miscommunication and all that but is also, I can't stress this enough, a REAL BULLET being fired from a REAL GUN--

--right at SEVERAL EXTREMELY MORTAL HUMANS who are standing DOWN RANGE of the LOADED METAPHOR GUN

you're worried about paperwork??? How much paperwork do you think you're gonna have to fill out when you accidentally cause the death of national treasure Laura Henderson???

also, ladies, WHY ARE YOU STANDING DOWNRANGE OF A LOADED GUN

the angel and the demon are too busy pining to operate their brains but YOU must have SOME kind of self-preservation instinct, right??

This is TOO CLOSE! Why was the blocking for the magic trick set up with the gun pointed off the side of the stage WHERE THE PEOPLE ARE???

JAIL. Jail for Aziraphale, jail for Crowley, jail for Mrs. Henderson too because she presumably had the power to clear stage right before this shit went down--or if not, then at any point during the approximate forty years of Longing Stares down the barrel of the Gay Metaphor Gun--and she DIDN'T, which is IRRESPONSIBLE, and no, I am not fun at parties, but you know what I am at parties is mindful of basic firearm safety (sadly a requirement, I live in the united states)

[gay-disabled-characters-showdown]

LGBTQ+ Disabled Characters Showdown Round 3, Wave 2, Poll 12

A character being totally canon LGBTQ+ and disabled was not required to be in this competition. Please check qualifications and propaganda before asking why a character is included. 

Check out the other polls in this wave and prior here.

Norma Khan-Dead End: Paranormal Park

Qualifications:

They are confirmed to be bisexual and autistic within the series she is form.

Bisexual and autistic

She's autistic and bisexual (she's just like me fr XD)

Propaganda:

Norma is very good queer and autistic representation, showing her struggles with her autism within the series (especially in season 1, episode 3) and is the one of the first characters in an animated young audience directed series to officially come out of the closet to someone, which is a big step towards good queer representation within animated series, especially those directed towards younger audiences.

She's a badass magical security guard. Also once she found out that the actress who was her special interest was a hella creepy spirit who was haunting her own theme park, Norma took her tf down. She had so many emotions about it, got her own song about how she'd adored and looked up to this actress and how betrayed she felt and how hard it was. Also! Also she is so absolutely sweet and loyal and! and her mom supports her which is so SWEET.

There's this whole episode dedicated to her and her mom, and her mom is already so supportive of her being autistic and wants to be a part of her special interest, but unbeknownst to her mom her special interest has changed. (We don't like evil ghost ladies that possess innocent actresses in this house). Her NEW special interest is the paranormal and it makes her such a badass in the show but also a mega nerd at the same time and the two are not mutually exclusive! And she gets a crush on a girl and has this whole thing about coming out as bi and even though her crush is straight it's not weird between them. She's constantly battling demons both literal and metaphorical but comes out on top with friends and family that love her.

Elim Garak-Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

Qualifications:

He has PTSD due to child abuse, as well as a painkiller addiction due to a brain implant. He is also extremely gay. Like literally everybody who watches DS9 immediately understands this about him. He was explicitly played by his actor, Andy Robinson, as attracted to Julian Bashir, and his only heterosexual romance is truly painful to witness. Andrew Robinson has also said that he has had a one-night stand with Dukat, one of the main villains of DS9 and noted lizard nazi. Do with that what you will. His closest relationship onscreen by far is with Julian.

Propaganda:

This man. There is a reason so many people are obsessed with him. Former spy, current tailor, forever an incurable bitch. Guilty of many war crimes, including onscreen attempted genocide. Once intentionally blew up his own tailor shop (with him in it) because he didn't want to ask for help with something. In his very first scene on the show, he wears an shirt that strongly resembles a watermelon, propositions Julian Bashir, and leaves while canonically high on painkillers. He has PTSD due to child abuse at the hands of the head of the space lizard KGB, who is also his dad, and a painkiller addiction due to a brain implant he has to help him withstand torture. He tortures a main character in one episode, and then a few episodes later they start having regular breakfasts together. Once got high on Space Weed and started systematically murdering people while making ominous announcements about chess over the PA system. The Most Character Ever.

Anything Else?:

He once told Julian to eat his rod. It was about a futuristic USB stick (datarod) but he still very much said it.

Submitted by @convenient-plot-device