#This applies to thinner people as well. Btw

[transgendercastiel]

NO LITTLE TRANS PERSON DONT BASE YOUR TRANSITION GOALS ON SOMEONE WHOS JUST MORE CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE THAN YOU!! NOOOOOO

[mikavlcs]

Start a Fire

Pairing: Gwen Stacy x gn!reader

Summary: Gwen saves you and you help her out in return.

Warnings: nothing besides some probable medical inaccuracies and my writing lmao (no atsv spoilers btw)

Word count: 2k

Notes: idk why everything i write is kinda unserious. this also may not entirely make sense, sorry about that...

Masterlist

Firsts were a special thing.

Everyone, for better or worse, remembered things like their first kiss, and their first date, and their first heartbreak. Because of the novelty of these events, their importance is inescapable, even to the most unsentimental of people.

This same principle applied to superhero activities—or, at least, it did for Gwen.

She would never forget her first high-speed car chase, or her first armed bank robbery, or her first (incredibly embarrassing) criminal interrogation. So, of course, she was excited when her police radio picked up reports of a burning apartment building over on the west side.

Okay, maybe excited wasn’t the right word since people were in danger and Gwen would never be excited about that, but she was looking forward to checking off another box on the list of ‘classic crime tropes’ she kept in her journal. Burning buildings were a staple in superhero comics, and after nearly nine months on the job, it was about time for her to experience it firsthand.

She zipped in and, after a quick chat with the outside firefighters, began extracting civies from the upper floors while they covered the lower floors. Thankfully, the fire wasn’t terrible. They caught it pretty early and since the apartment building was three blocks away from a fire station, there were firefighters on the scene within ten minutes.

Since the fire started on the first floor, the worst of it was easily at the bottom floors, which the firefighters elected to cover since Gwen had more verticality and speed, but there was still smoke. A lot of it.

Now, Gwen knew a lot about fire safety thanks to her elementary school’s yearly presentations on the subject, but by the ten-minute mark, she was beginning to see that she had vastly underestimated the effects of smoke inhalation.

She didn’t have the respirators that they wore, her only protection against the smoke was the cloth of her mask. And at first, that was enough, but it was starting to get to her now. Luckily, she only had one more person to grab—someone on the top floor, frantically waving out one of the windows.

Hastily, Gwen crawled up toward the window you were leaning out of. The smoke was much thinner up here since the fire was only just spreading a few floors down, and she was very grateful for that. She crept to the side of the window, offering a grin you couldn’t see and a wave.

“Hey!” she greeted, securing an arm around your waist. “Hold on tight. This will be quick, just, uh, close your eyes if you’re afraid of heights.”

Once your arms were looped behind her neck, she webbed a nearby building and swung toward a nearby alley.

She deposited you down first, making sure you were steady on your feet before releasing the web and stumbling toward the nearest wall. A series of hacking coughs forced themselves from her throat, making her lean most of her weight against the wall.

“You okay, Spider-Woman?” The question came from her left and she looked over to see you resting against the same wall as her, staring with a mixture of confusion and concern. Gwen flashed a shaky thumbs-up in an attempt to both placate you and preserve her image.

“Perfectly fine. This is actually my first burning building rescue, so this—” She cut herself off with a particularly painful wheeze then finished with, “This is actually a pretty big moment for me.”

“Uh-huh, well maybe you should sit down for a minute,” you suggested, but her mind was already on her next destination, wherever that may be.

She shook her head at the idea, fighting the nausea that came with the motion. “No, no, I’m good. Feeling great. I’ll, uh, I’ll see you around.”

There was an attempt to raise her arm and shoot a web, but it failed rather miserably. She didn’t think the limb even moved, but the sudden, heavy wave of drowsiness that washed over her made that really hard to care about. A sigh slipped from her mouth, eyes drooping.

“Okay, yeah, maybe I’ll just take a little nap first.” The admission came out mumbled, but Gwen didn’t really notice. Nor did she feel herself pitch forward and slip off the wall entirely as her eyes were already slipping closed.

The world went dark before she could even hit the ground.

—

When Gwen woke again, the first of two major things she noticed was that she wasn’t in the alley she collapsed in.

In fact, she wasn’t outside at all. Her eyes cracked open and instead of staring into the cloudy afternoon sky, she was looking intently at a ceiling. And instead of laying on hard asphalt, she was resting on something soft—a couch, maybe.

She was in someone’s house, she belatedly realized, and that was when the second thing registered all at once.

Her mask was still on.

And it wasn’t just on, it was still tucked snugly into the neckline of her suit, the way she always kept it to ensure it never rode up. That meant that either someone went to great lengths to put it back in the exact position she liked it, or it was never taken off in the first place. When she saw you sitting in the chaise lounge across from the couch, her suspicions leaned toward the latter.

You hadn’t noticed her wake, eyes glued on the tv to her right, so she took the initiative to speak. It was harder than she expected since her throat was so dry, but after a few swallows, she managed to rasp her question out.

“Uh, where am I, exactly?”

Your eyes flicked to her instantly, and you sat up straighter, leaning forward a bit. “My house. Well, my mom’s house actually. She’s at work, won’t be back for a while. Good thing, too, because she would lose her shit if she saw you passed out on her couch.”

“Not a big fan of vigilantes?” she asked dryly. You chuckled.

“No, she’s not a big fan of her furniture getting dirty.”

“Oh,” Gwen muttered, pushing herself up to sit, “sorry, I can—”

Her sentence was cut short by you standing and gently shoving her to lie back down. “It’s fine, I’ll clean it later. Stay there.”

You watched her and, once you knew she would obey, walked out of her sightline. Gwen listened to your footsteps, noting the way you stopped around fifteen feet away. Then, she tilted her head back to glance at the windows and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw the light shining through the thin, drawn curtains. She couldn’t have been out for more than an hour.

Now that her initial question had been answered, she moved on to her secondary. “Did you drag me all the way here by yourself?”

“Well, I was visiting a friend’s apartment earlier, so we were only a few blocks away,” you called from somewhere on the other side of the couch, the faint sound of a refrigerator being opened and closed compounding the statement. “But yes, I did drag you here myself. You’re heavier than you look, by the way.”

Gwen’s eyes narrowed beneath her mask, but she chose to take it as a compliment to her forming musculature.

You returned a few minutes later with a glass of water and a pitcher filled nearly to the brim, setting them both down on the coffee table in front of her. Immediately, she pushed herself to sit up, hiking her mask over her nose and downing the entire glass in a few gulps. In her peripheral, she saw you sit back down and look at the tv again, letting the room lapse into quiet.

Gwen let the silence sit for a bit, then asked, “So, why didn’t you take off my mask? Most people would jump at the chance to figure out my identity.”

“I’m not into invading other people’s privacy,” you said plainly with a light shrug. “Plus, you saved my life. Taking the mask off after that would’ve been a dick move.”

She stayed quiet for a minute, absorbing what you said, then, with genuine sincerity, said, “Thank you.”

You waved it off. “Consider us even. I wouldn’t have made it out without your help, this was the least I could do.”

A nod was the only response she gave. She knew she should probably leave now; she was in a stranger’s house, after all. But you didn’t seem to mind, so she poured herself another glass and settled back on the couch.

Despite the unorthodox situation, the atmosphere remained calm and quiet with occasional thought-provoking questions from you such as “What’s it like being wanted for murder?” and “Why do you wear ballet shoes instead of shoes that will protect your feet in fights?” neither of which she had solid answers for but had fun with anyway.

It was nice. Weird, undoubtedly, but a nice change of pace from the more turbulent and fast-paced interactions she was used to having with people as Spider-Woman. You seemed to be enjoying it too, if the fact that you didn’t kick her out an hour ago was anything to go by.

Time continued to pass, the darkening sky outside the window escaping both of your notice. Her phone buzzed in her pocket a few times while you were talking, but she elected to ignore it. That is until the tranquil air was eventually broken by her phone ringing, the Spider-Woman theme song echoing throughout the room.

“Sorry,” Gwen mumbled, pulling her phone out of her suit pocket. She scanned the screen and her eyes widened. It was her dad. She squinted slightly, confused as to why he was calling already, but then she looked at the time, and her eyes widened. Her dad had been expecting her home over an hour ago.

Panicked, she shot to her feet, narrowly avoiding slamming her shin into the coffee table by the couch. She took one step, then another, testing. Her limbs still felt a bit heavier than usual, but it wasn’t as bad as earlier, and she’d be able to swing home with minimal issues.

“Gotta go?” you asked, eyeing her from your seat.

She sighed, nodded. “Yeah, sorry, just remembered I have somewhere to be.”

You gave an understanding hum and she ventured to the door. Her hands were about to twist the doorknob when an idea suddenly popped into her head. It was a stupid idea, which made it all the more pervasive to her waning self-control. She debated back and forth with herself for all of seven seconds before she spun on her heels.

Gwen cleared her throat and put on a casual tone, praying her voice didn’t crack. “Hey, do you wanna get coffee,” she paused briefly, combing over her schedule in her head, “this Saturday? Y’know, as thanks for all this.”

“I thought we established that we were even,” you said, eyes narrowed.

“Well, I’m unestablishing it. So, coffee?” She rocked back on her heels, watching you ruminate on the offer. 

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, you shrugged. “Who could say no to coffee with a wanted vigilante?”

Remembering that her mask was still pulled up halfway, she restrained the large smile threatening to creep onto her face to a small smirk. “Great, I’ll see you then…" Her sentence came to an abrupt end when she searched for a name and realized you had never given her one. “Uh, I didn’t catch your name?”

You raised a brow. “Are you gonna give me yours?”

She paused, then cocked her head to the side. “Fair enough. Then I’ll see you Saturday, stranger.”

“See you, spidey,” you said with a smile and a two-finger salute, both of which Gwen returned before pulling her mask down and jetting out the door.

She swung across the city with a speed that impressed even her, weaving through buildings and traffic with a racing heart and an immovable smile the whole way to her apartment.

In the end, Gwen wound up being grounded for a month since she was a little too distracted on her swing home to come up with a plausible excuse for her dad, but it wasn’t a problem. She would just sneak out Saturday during her dad’s shift for your coffee (maybe) date, and if she got caught and her punishment got extended, then so be it.

It would totally be worth it.

—

hi, if you made it this far, thanks for reading and i hope you have a good day 🥳🫶

[lixenn]

♡ 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐌𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐀𝐋𝐒. ♡ Tag 10 followers you’d like to get to know better

TAGGED BY @dreamieparadise

TAGGING. @childe-of-saulot @dontknow-willaddlater @tangomagnolija @moonlit-mystery-writer @cloudvaria I ain't tagging 10 people that's too much effort, also no pressure in doing this btw and if anyone else wants to participate go for it!

✧. ┊ 𝑵𝑨𝑴𝑬 : Lisa (don't mind sharing that because do you know how many people exist with that name? I can recall meeting at least ten in my life like dude this name is so fucking common in Germany)

✧. ┊ 𝑨𝑳𝑰𝑨𝑺 : Lix but that's just my most common nickname, I'm taking this oppurtunity to share my nickname collection:

Lixxie

Lixxy

Buddy (@myrmyrtheorca exclusive)

High Priestress and Name Bringer (@childe-of-saulot exclusive)

Gremlin

Lili (unlocked by @dreamieparadise)

Phoenix (also unlocked by momo but not often used)

Your Highness (unlocked by @rebo-chan though also not often used)

There might be more but those are the most common or unique I suppose >.<

✧. ┊ 𝑮𝑬𝑵𝑫𝑬𝑹 : Mystery! I don't fucking know what it is and I have no plans of finding out so my gender will stay unknown for me and the world lmao

✧. ┊ 𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹 𝑺𝑰𝑮𝑵 : capricorn

✧. ┊ 𝑯𝑬𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻 : 170 cm

✧. ┊ 𝑺𝑬𝑿𝑼𝑨𝑳𝑰𝑻𝒀 : Like my gender this one is also a mystery! I'm some sort of queer as in not straight as in trying to define my sexuality gives me a headache. I'm probably also wandering around like a lost lamb on the aroace spectrum so yeah... I join Momo in being perpetually confused.

✧. ┊ 𝑨𝑽𝑬𝑹𝑨𝑮𝑬 𝑯𝑶𝑼𝑹𝑺 𝑶𝑭 𝑺𝑳𝑬𝑬𝑷 : Ummm... varies greatly? If I have a good run and it's during week days than somewhere between 7 and 8 hours. If I have an insomnia spell than it's between 4 hours and nothing. If I'm on holiday it's 8 hours or sometimes nothing when I hyperfixate on something. Me and sleep have a difficult realtionship.

✧. ┊ 𝑫𝑶𝑮 𝑶𝑹 𝑪𝑨𝑻 𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑺𝑶𝑵 : Cat person, their smug and dumb aura compels me.

✧. ┊ 𝑩𝑳𝑨𝑵𝑲𝑬𝑻 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑺𝑳𝑬𝑬𝑷 𝑾𝑰𝑻𝑯 : Ummm it's a blanket? Like a regular ass bed blanket, I ain't really special with blankets. It's currently my thinner one becuase it's summer. I do have more blankets, but I only ever sleep with one unless i get super cold and even then I often end up covered in just one when i wake up.

✧. ┊ 𝑫𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑴 𝑻𝑹𝑰𝑷 : Trip across to world to visit my online friends. I wanna go visit Japan with @unwrathful, I wanna chill with buddy at the beach in Italy, eat lots of food with @nxmimochi in Korea, hang out with my liege in Denmark and lots more! Unfortunately I kinda get major anxiety when I think about travelling alone especially via plane so I will need to overcome that first.

✧. ┊ 𝑩𝑳𝑶𝑮 𝑩𝑰𝑹𝑻𝑯𝑫𝑨𝑻𝑬 : 2020 but no clue about the month

✧. ┊ 𝑾𝑯𝒀 𝑰 𝑴𝑨𝑫𝑬 𝑨 𝑻𝑼𝑴𝑩𝑳𝑹 𝑩𝑳𝑶𝑮 : I really don't remember, maybe because I wanted to follow my favourite fanfic authors? Or because I basically had so many tumblr screenshots saved on pinterest I thought at this point I might just as well join. But honestly could be some completely different reason too it's been four years my memory isn't that good lmao

✧. ┊ 𝑼𝑹𝑳 𝑴𝑬𝑨𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮 : it's based on one of my irl nicknames. Breakdown: Lisa -> Lischen (-chen suffic in german often indicates something cute and small but it can't be applied to every name and object it's a bit complicated) -> Lischenn (the additional n comes from me fucking up the nickname in put in a DS game and it stuck) -> Lixenn (replaced the sch with x because Idk it looked cool? once again I can't remember)

[appleflavoredkitkats]

small rant: i think whitewashing in the mcyt fandom goes unnoticed a lot, and i'm not talking about the skin tone.

while whitewashing skin tones still happen, i think people have to realizing that skin tone is not the only thing that distinguishes a poc. if you look at pictures of poc, their facial features and hair may look vastly different from what white people look like!

eurocentric features include lighter skin, bigger eyes, smaller and pointier noses, less full cheeks and lips, and straight hair. and if you look at the way most people draw creators of color, you might realize that a lot of artworks can depict the cc with the correct skin tone, BUT they are seen with the most eurocentric of features, which is a big problem! why is it a problem? because people have always called eurocentric features ideal in terms of aesthetics and beauty, and this ideology even bleeds unto the way we draw people. as someone with small eyes and a big nose, it sucks to see so many people completely sabotage the way most cc's of color look like. not only is it not accurate but it's also upsetting for us poc to see that others aren't embracing the way we naturally look like.

i don't want to show actual drawings here, but to give examples of what this type of whitewashing can be: drawing quackity with a sharp nose when his nose is slightly flatter. drawing ponk with a thin face, small nose, and straight hair when he has fuller cheeks, a bigger nose, and curlier hair. drawing tapl with bigger eyes, a thinner face, and smaller nose when he has thinner eyes, a fuller face, and a bigger nose.

i know some people can be concerned because you don't want to accidentally draw poc as offensive caricatures of themselves, which is a valid concern, especially when it comes to drawing noses. but honestly? it's not that hard to avoid. just think: am i drawing emphasis on a single feature and making it comedically bigger than the rest of the drawing? drawing characters with bigger noses is not bad y'all! it just is when you're doing it for comedic effect + trying to portray someone evil. but if you begin drawing poc with bigger noses in more casual and innocent art pieces, it may lessen the negative stigma people may have when it comes to people with big noses! (same logic applies to smaller eyes btw, or any feature a poc might have!)

we've grown up creating art with tutorials made by white people, which is why it may be hard to diverge from art styles that only know how to draw white people. but it's not bad when you can't do it immediately— it's only awful when you recognize this yet don't attempt diversifying your art style at all. drawing poc correctly is so important because CORRECT REPRESENTATION MATTERS. i don't think i should give an explanation for this since this is pretty self-explanatory, but damn is it rough to see people completely erase a poc's features just to appeal to eurocentric aesthetics. as someone who somewhat sees their features in people like quackity, tapl, and ponk while also seeing that the fandom erases those features hurts and hits hard. think of the message that might send to every person who looks like those cc's.

tldr; whitewashing doesn't just mean the lightening of skin tones, it means erasing features most poc's have and replacing them with eurocentric features. please try your best drawing poc's correctly!

ps. not related but i need to get this message across as well: please also remember that poc is not an adjective. poc stands for “person of color”, and when you say poc cc for example, that becomes “person of color content creator”. instead, use “of color” after nouns! for example, “content creator of color”, “streamer of color”, “women of color”, etc. if not, use “poc” as a noun!

[maerenee930]

11, 13, 17, and 99 for the asks to send your friends at 4AM, and also have you been listening to any new music?? Or just cool stuff, any good movies?

thank you so so much for asking these ellie!! i truly appreciate it 🥰 so since my answers for these questions are (not surprisingly) long, they’re all under the cut. so no one has to scroll past an extremely long post 😅

11. Would you change your appearance if you could?

- honestly, yes. i would. like i’ve always been self-conscious about my nose. i think it’s big and just not cute 😓 (and i think i have a deviated septum so i wanna change it for that reason as well lol. i’ve thought this for years, btw. this isn’t like a new thing 😅) and i would love to have my thighs be thinner. same for the lower section of my stomach. i think they look weird. (not putting myself down. just being honest.) there’s other things i would change, but it mostly just would have to do with me losing weight and i just don’t think right now is the time to go into all of that. i mean if anyone is curious as to what those specific changes are, you can dm me and we can talk about it. but i also realize the topic of weight (gaining or losing) is a tough topic and can be triggering and i don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable 🖤

13. Do you believe in reincarnation?

- i do. but it’s weird. so i feel that some people are kind of able to chose if they want to come back or not. like some people want to experience life in different ways. or they want to experience certain situations they have already experienced differently. or if there are certain things they always dreamt of doing or have longed to try and weren’t able to, maybe if they feel or believe in it as well, they can comeback in some small way and be able to experience whatever it was that they wanted. but idk if we’re always aware of the fact that it happened. (for those of us who do believe in it/have been reincarnated.) i think that’s sometimes why we’re drawn to certain things or people. or why certain events, things and people feel so familiar and safe to us, even if it’s brand new and hasn’t been in our life or apart of it for very long. or why we gets certain types of déjà vu. (for myself personally, i usually have déjà vu because of something i’ve dreamt. not always. but it feels like more often than not, that’s what happens. if that makes sense…?) or maybe even it’s just pieces of us that come back. like certain personality traits and characteristics come back when we’ve moved on. most of us as individuals, are able to move on when we pass away or are able to go wherever you feel is what happens to you when you pass on (i’m not gonna say anything specifically cause that’s not my place to. everything is different for everyone and i respect those perspectives and opinions.) but there are certain parts of us that have unfinished business (so to speak) so a part of us comes back. you know? i realize how crazy this sounds but it’s honestly what i feel/believe 😅

17. Did you have imaginary friends? Do you still have them?

- no. as a kid, i didn’t. i tried so hard to. but (and this still applies to me currently) i can’t picture things in my mind like a lot of people. like someone can close their eyes and visualize things perfectly and it can be very detailed. for me when i do that, nothing. it’s just black. it’s like i can feel that’s what i’m supposed to be seeing, but nothing happens. the same when i tried to make myself have imaginary friends. people can visualize imaginary friends right next to them and i never could. like even when i play out little scenarios in my head (or sometimes quietly out loud when i’m by myself 😅 i’ve been doing this since i was a kid. it’s like my version of day dreaming lol.) i don’t actually see those people, places or things. i just feel it like i know i’m supposed to be able to see that it’s there, even though it’s not. but i can’t actually or really and truly see anything. like when i would play “pretend” as a kid with my friends, i would describe whatever physical things i was using or whatever was apart of what we were playing not only for them, but for myself cause i couldn’t fully or really picture it or pretend like i saw it. i wanted an imaginary friend so bad!! especially after watching the movie “Drop Dead Fred” or other things that has imaginary friends in them. but i couldn’t. and when i did try or would say i did have imaginary friends (because i didn’t want to seem weird because i didn’t) i wasn’t even that creative. i would say my imaginary friends were some of my favorite tv show characters. most cartoon ones. sooo yeah… that’s how my brain works. very weird, i know 😅😂

99. Do you believe in magic? Are you superstitious?

- i think there are types of magic that do exist. like i don’t necessarily mean like illusions and stuff we see on tv 😅 i think it’s more like a spiritual kind of thing. and kinda yeah. i am superstitious about certain things. i can’t think of specific examples at the moment, lol. to quote michael scott from the office, “i’m not superstitious. but- i am a little sititious” 😂 that’s pretty accurate lmao.

i have listened to some new music/newer to me even though it’s old 😅 i’ve been listening to ‘cherry’ by fletcher & hayley kiyoko 😍 two of abba’s new songs from the new album (‘don’t shut me down’ and ‘just a notion’) 💙 some songs from happier than every by billie eilish (‘happier than ever’ and ‘oxytocin’) 🖤 ‘sweet jane’ by the velvet underground 🥰 ‘grace kelly’ by mika 😊 ‘love is strange’ by mickey & sylvia (i’ve loved this song since i was a kid cause dirty dancing is one of my favorite movies 🖤) and honestly, pretty much all of the album ‘inside’ by bo burnham 😅💙 (i adore bo burnham)

but, i’m always looking for new(/old but new to me) music and if you have any suggestions or songs you think i would like, please feel free to send me them! 💙🖤

as for other cool stuff or good movies, i’ve been rewatching a lot of my favorite shows lately. like psych and stranger things! if you haven’t seen psych (i know it was a popular show but it really surprises me how many people haven’t seen it and it makes me sad cause i love it so much 🥺😅) i really recommend it! it’s soo funny and just soo good! shawn’s sense of humor is too perfect and he’s like klaus in the sense that he’s sarcastic and honestly kinda plays dumb even though he’s really not. or he really makes you question if he is just playing or maybe a little bit serious when he doesn’t know something lol. anyway, i just love it so much! there’s a ton of pop culture references in it and it’s a fun show to quote randomly at times and it’s hilarious 😂💙💚🍍

i’ve also been rewatching/continuing to watch (cause i haven’t watched all the seasons of this 😅) wentworth! i love it so much! for anyone who likes/liked orange is the new black, they should watch this! to me, it’s soooo much better than orange! it’s an australian show and it’s fantastic! (heads up for anyone who does watch this and hasn’t seen it before. there are adult fun time sexy scenes in it and they do show stuff. and there’s lots of swearing and mentions of drugs and other things. i mean, it’s about a women’s prison 😅 but if that kind of stuff makes you uncomfortable, then maybe it’s not for you 😅) it’s also pretty gay and i love it 😂🥰

oh also, one of my friends convinced me to watch vampire diaries. while there are cheesy moments, it’s actually pretty good. i like it a lot. it’s been a minute since i’ve watched it, but if you like shows like one tree hill, gossip girl (i suppose girl more girls as well in the sense that there’s a lot of sarcasm in both shows and it’s funny. i love gilmore girls btw! not hating on it at all!) or want a different and somewhat less dramatic but somehow equally dramatic plot as twilight, i recommend it 😅 (basically, if you like cw shows. which i grew up watching one tree hill and i love it 😅💙)

as for good movies, i gotta mention one of my more recent favorites, fear street part 2: 1978 🖤 i mean the whole trilogy is fantastic!! but the second one is my absolute favorite 🥰 and i’ve been pushing myself out of my comfort zone and trying to watch some other thrillers and they were okay, but not necessarily ones i would recommend 😅 if you love older movies like me, i will always suggest my number one favorite movie, back to the future 🥰 is it a perfect movie? no, of course not. has everything in it aged well, no 😅 but it’s a classic and it and the other two movies will always hold a special place in my heart 😅🥰 and i will always recommend the rocky horror picture show (if you’re looking to watch something to make fun of. i love this movie so much even though it’s horrible. but i mean the music is great and tim curry in a corset and fishnets 😍 it’s a good time lol) and i will always recommend my other absolute favorites movie (i think it’s tied with back to the future, if i’m being honest 💙) is the road within 🥰 not a perfect movie. but a great one that i’ve fallen in love with over the past 2 almost 3 years and it will also always hold a special place in my heart 🖤 ooh and i recommend the decoy bride! it has david tennant in it (if you haven’t seen it) and it’s kinda cheesy but soo cute! it’s one of my go to movies when it’s almost that time of the month and i need something really cute and sweet to watch 😅 i just really love it and think anyone who is a fan of david tennant, should watch it 💖

and i’m sure there are a bunch more movies and shows i could suggest or recommend (especially with it being the holiday season and there are so many shows and movies for the holiday season) but i’ll just leave it for another time 😅

i’m so sorry i wrote so much! i hope all of it makes sense for the most part! and i’m so sorry for any spelling or grammar errors! thank you so so much again for asking these, sweetie! ilysm and i hope you’re doing well 💙🖤 sending you the biggest and warmest of hugs, lots of positive energy and good vibes and all the love! 🫂

[dancerdiaries]

Review of my dance major experience

I graduated from college a couple weeks ago, so here I am, offering my opinions on the dance program at the school I chose. I’m choosing to keep the school anonymous. If you are a high school student looking for a school with a good dance program and you choose to take my review into account, feel free to message me and I’ll give you the name of the school so you can apply or avoid it as you choose. Also, I hope you find my comments useful.

Overall, I give my university’s BALLET area a 3/10. My explanation of that score is pretty lengthy, so I put it under a “read more” for tidiness’ sake.

This is a review of the ballet area only, since that was my emphasis. I didn’t interact much with the contemporary, folk, or ballroom areas, so I don’t have anything to say about them. Also, this is just from my personal experience and is in no way a completely accurate assessment. But I’m also not the only one from this school who has these opinions. Anyway, here goes.

GOOD POINTS:

It’s generally a positive atmosphere. The students and faculty are overall friendly and supportive (there were exceptions, of course). There isn’t an insanely competitive atmosphere, either--at least, not to the degree of other places I’ve heard stories about (razor blades in a rival’s pointe shoes...what kind of jerk does that?!?). No body shaming from the other students or from the teachers. That was pretty nice. No bullying, ever.

The education was pretty good. A lot of the students are brought up to a pre-professional, or even professional, technique level by the time they graduate. I’ve improved way more these past three years than I have in my whole life, probably.

The ballet area recently started giving students the chance to choreograph on one of their companies, complete with faculty feedback. The contemporary area did that ages ago, and I’m really glad the ballet area followed because the school really needed opportunities for ballet choreography. I’ve heard that a lot of dance programs don’t offer students opportunities to present their own work at all. I was pretty lucky.

BAD POINTS:

Oh, boy. I have a lot to say.

This university markets itself as an all-inclusive, positive, “we don’t give up on anyone,” “everyone belongs” kind of place. So I was a little disappointed when that wasn’t the case in the ballet area.

My biggest problem with the ballet area is that the favoritism is insane. The faculty pretends it doesn’t exist, but I always got the vibe from them that a student is only worth teaching if the student is already an amazing dancer. If you aren’t perfect, you aren’t worth their time. The top ballet level/company (same thing--the top level is their top company) gets all sorts of special privileges. First, the teachers help them reach a professional level and help them find jobs and stuff like that. They don’t do that for anyone else. Those that start the dance major in the lower levels don’t get the help they need to succeed. Which is stupid, because isn’t that the professor’s job? To help ALL of their students prepare for the professional world?

These top dancers also get probably 90% of all the performing opportunities the ballet area offers. They go on tour, they get their own on-campus show in the big, super-nice theater, they get to perform in the lower-level company’s show (like excuse you. This is our time to shine. You get plenty of times to shine of your own. Go away), they get to be in faculty works, dance films, photoshoots, promotional videos, etc. etc.

Guess what the other dancers get? Nothing. Nada. Unless you end up in a friend’s senior project. Or if you manage to get on the lower-level company, which is hard, as I’ll explain later.

These top dancers get to break the dress code!!! They’re that special!! (Well, ok, they don’t get to break it much. You can wear lower-than-usually-allowed backs, but heaven forbid your leotard straps are thinner than an inch.)

No wonder these dancers are snobs. The teachers spoil them rotten.

My second-biggest peeve is that it’s nearly impossible to get onto said top company. The top company tends to have the same members year after year. Seriously, the cast didn’t change much at all until this past year, and that was because a lot of people graduated. Basically, auditions for this company are just a formality. The directors already have their dancers picked. Why these dancers even show up to the audition is a mystery, because they’re already guaranteed a spot (I think. That’s what it seems like). Heck, this past year, they picked someone for the company who wasn’t even going to the school yet.

This means that each year, there are only four or five open slots. And generally, unless someone really good comes along, they tend to pick their new members exclusively from the lower company. Although I think they’re trying to get more freshmen into their ranks recently, which is nice. Unless you’re not a freshman or not on the lower-level company. Because then you have no chance at all.

The lower-level company is a bit better. Only about a third of the company is repeat members. But still, the directors really like to pick people they’ve worked with before.

So basically, fifty dancers show up to audition for maybe--maybe--fifteen available company spots, despite there being about 30-40-ish (depending on the repertoire) company spots that exist. This means many dancers get turned away every year they try out.

Which sucks if you consider the fact that you need to be on a performing company to graduate in the dance program. That’s what happened to me. I couldn’t get my performing credits until my last semester, when I finally got onto the lower-level company--which, BTW, only happened because only 13 people showed up to the audition (because this was the first time this company was available in the spring semester and no one knew about it), and so by default everyone got in.

(Well, senior projects and faculty works give you performing credits, too, but as I said, only the best dancers are picked for faculty works. So basically, you better hope you have friends who are seniors.)

I have a suspicion that the directors choose company members based on body type in addition to technique, despite claiming not to. All the top company members look the same: long limbs, skinny bodies, few or no curves. Again, the lower company is better--there’s a little more diversity in body types--but all of their repeat members I’ve known have ballet bodies. I don’t know if this is, in fact, from directors’ biases, or if that body type is a mechanical advantage that gives those dancers better technique.

Also, all the top-company dancers have prettier faces. Kind of a small detail, and could be a coincidence, but it’s a suspicious detail nonetheless.

That’s dangerous. That can be really dangerous, and I came to understand that firsthand. The last two times I auditioned before I finally was accepted onto a company, I was at the right technical level and was still rejected. I’d also failed big-time at a summer workshop and competition the summer before the second audition while all the thin, pretty girls in my study abroad group won scholarships. So after that second audition, I began to worry that I wasn’t being picked because I was fat, or ugly, or both. For the first time in my life, I started skipping meals and counting calories and wearing makeup. I’m not usually worried about my looks. And if I got super insecure about my body, then other girls who do care about how they look are at a much higher risk of eating disorders because of the ballet area’s biases. And that’s not the kind of problem I was expecting to see at an “all-inclusive, everyone belongs” type of school. I was disappointed, and angry. The school told me they were better than that.

So yeah, 3/10. The education is decent, but it’s even better if you’re a good dancer to begin with. It’s a better atmosphere than most schools, but it’s still pretty political. And I’m pretty ticked that the university lied to me about their values.

[spaceorphan18]

Finding Kurt Hummel: The New Rachel

Masterpost

4x01: The New Rachel

It’s a new year, and a new Kurt.  Actually - it’s more like a new show entirely as Glee heads mashes up Glee: The College Years with Glee: The Next Generation.  It’s a rocky start here at the beginning of season 4, where the show loses its identity a little, and struggles with what it wants to be.  I’m not sure it ever quite figures it out, but we do get an entertaining second half of the series anyway. 

I don’t know what BTS stuff happened to prompt it, and I’m not here to speculate, but this is the year that Kurt takes a back seat a lot.  So -- among the facts, I’m placing my own interpretation of things, but the blanks are often so wide here, that just about any interpretation is possible. 

So, settle in kids, because this is about to get bumpy. 

Back from Break

Kurt’s first mention in Rachel’s inner-monologue, where she wishes he had come to New York with her.  And I kind of roll my eyes at the story here.  Because, essentially, Kurt didn’t get into NYADA so that Rachel could be alone in New York for --- all of one episode.  So what was the point? Other than to give Kurt one episode of misery in Lima before heading out there himself? I’m not going to apply reason to any of this. 

Meanwhile, Rachel’s calling him every three hours because she really doesn’t handle being alone very well.  And we get our first glimpses of Kurt.  And here’s the interesting thing.  The outfit - it’s a very Kurt-ish outfit.  But Kurt, well, he’s changed.  I don’t necessarily think he’s taller, but his face is thinner, and more mature, and for the first time - it’s Chris Colfer does not look like he should be playing a teenager.  It’s definitely a (welcomed) jarring physical change.  Also, natural highlights, my ass, Chris. 

Also worth mentioning - the fact that Kurt refers to a penis as a “twinkle tube”. You know he’s named Blaine’s.  I mean, c’mon. 

So, Kurt’s back at McKinley - and there is a little bit of, ah, c’mon Kurt, move on with your life lingering around.  He goes back to visit Sue, who has just had her baby.  Did anyone remember she was pregnant? Oops. 

And then we are introduced to Kitty -- and the first thing the show does is introduce her as the New Quinn, and she insults Kurt.  And the writers really thought this was the best way to get us to like the new characters? Really? 

So - we learn that Kurt has signed up for classes at Lima’s community college.  Sue still calls him a sad sack, but I mean, what does he expect if he’s going to go back and visit her? This is also interesting when you think about it - this scene is here to revisit both Kurt and Sue, but doesn’t really make a whole lot of sense within the character dynamics - other than adding another mark on my Sue and Kurt have a strange connection list.  

Anyway - Kurt might be handling everything Sue’s throwing at him pretty well, but there is some truth to what she says.  That he really shouldn’t be hanging around the past since it is holding him back.  And Kurt knows this. 

Lima Bean

So, we find that Kurt is working at the Lima Bean.  Remember way back when - when Kurt was filling out an application? Makes me wonder just how long he’s been working there, though probably not long if his manager is yelling at him to refill things, as if he’s just learning.  He is really adorable in his uniform though. 

Here’s my thing about Kurt being still in Lima.  I think there are relevant stories about staying in the place you grew up.  I think you can go home again - as evident by Finn’s story, and how I think Lima fit him best (and in a way that doesn’t fit Will very well).  But Kurt, Kurt isn’t really living right now.  He’s hanging on to the past, is way more excited about glee club auditions than the two people in glee club, is being bullied by a girl still in high school, and getting yelled at to fill the biscotti.  Kurt’s just kind of existing, and not pushing himself to be his best, in that Kurt-ish way he usually does.  

It’s interesting - the only other time we see Kurt start a season being content with the sad state of his life is season one.  Season four is about hitting the reset button on the show in a lot of ways, and Kurt, who has had a really great couple of years, is starting from the bottom again. 

So, yeah, let’s talk about Blaine for a second.  At the beginning of his scene Blaine and Brittany are chatting - about Santana, and how Brittany’s not having the greatest time.  In a lot of ways Klaine and Brittana are going through the same thing, and it’s not easy for either couple. 

Brittany misses Santana because she’s never there, and you get the feeling that even though Kurt is right there next to him, Blaine misses Kurt, too.  I can only assume that the summer was kind of rough -- and that Kurt was in a deep funk for a lot of it not having gotten into NYADA.  Blaine was already doom and gloom about their relationship before, but Kurt staying in Lima isn’t any better.  He’s only a shell of himself, trying to pass the time any way he can.  

Also worth noting - Brittany calls Kurt out on his patheticness, as Blaine tries to sugarcoat it.  I kind of like that Brittany is never afraid to tell it like it is.  

Anyway, Kurt and Blaine have been off kilter for a while, and there are tidbits in season three that show this, but here, they are really out of sync.  And it’s going to be a long, long time before they’re back on the same page.  It’s going to be really hard, but man, there will be a lot of great stuff to sink my teeth into.  

Auditions

It’s funny that Kurt is so into auditions here.  Also, it’s going to give him practice for when he comes back in two years and is running the club with Rachel.  Interestingly, he’s sitting next to a way less than enthused Blaine.  

Btw, why are all the glee club members there watching? That seems weird to me. 

Anyway - this whole scene is for the introduction of Jake Puckerman, who is channeling his brother pretty hard here.  Kurt declares that it’s rude when Jake purposely knocks over the music stand.  But c’mon. Will was pretty rude interrupting him in the first place. 

Also, Kurt’s still there for Marley’s audition - but we don’t really see him. 

The New Rachel

You guys remember when a BTS still came out for this moment, and we all concluded that the higher Kurt’s hair got, the more gelled Blaine’s got? Yeah... 

Also, nice to see that Kurt’s still got an insane way of organizing music.  Who lays it all out on the floor? Also - he’s dividing it up this time between genres, Broadway, Standards, Top 40, which at least makes more sense than by emotion. 

A big chunk of this episode is devoted to deciding who the ‘New Rachel’ is.  And here’s where Will’s teaching style has done some damage - because these very talented kids are all fighting against each other in order to be the ‘star’ and replace Rachel Berry.  I will say, one nice thing about the New New Directions is that they do kind of get rid of the whole New Rachel rhetoric pretty quickly and become a much more ensemble based group -- AS IT SHOULD BE.  But, part of that is the difference between Finn leading the group and Will.  

Kurt, meanwhile, is totally misremembering his time at McKinley, and claims that the glee club was about acceptance.  And to him, it probably was, because it was the first time he felt like he belong, like he was a part of something.  But that’s not necessarily true to others in the group.  And, Tina does have a good point - Rachel, Mercedes, Santana, and Kurt fought all the time over who was the biggest diva.  

Interestingly, there’s no reaction shot from Kurt when Blaine receives New Rachel status.  I actually don’t think that was intentional.  But it is interesting... 

It’s Time

Okay, so here we go.  The conversation starts out about Blaine being the lead soloist.  And what Kurt says to him is kind of strange.  First, that Rachel made everyone feel included.  No she did not, what even Kurt? If there’s one thing that I don’t like about this season it’s Kurt drinking /all/ the Rachel kool-aide.  Also, I’m not sure why the comment to Blaine about wanting to make sure everyone was included.  If there’s one person who is going to do just that - it’s Blaine.  But, I mean, it’s dialogue to fit the episode more than the character, so there’s that. 

But then there’s Blaine to Kurt -- that he essentially says, you’re stuck, you need to move on.  And he’s right.  Kurt knows that he’s right.  And I know Blaine gets a lot of flack for pushing Kurt to New York then being upset that Kurt left but A) Kurt wouldn’t have done anything he wasn’t ready to do deep down and B) Kurt, once he moves to New York, is not a model boyfriend, and that’s a whole issue I’ll be chatting about in later episodes. 

But yeah, it’s killing Blaine to do this, because he is incredibly scared about their relationship going forward, and you know, Kurt is, too.  He’s finally here to have the conversation he didn’t want to have in Goodbye.  But Blaine just reiterates Kurt’s earlier words - that they’ll be okay (even though, now, they both seem unsure). But the important thing is that Kurt staying in Lima - would not be any better to their relationship, and I think they both know that, too. 

Something I’ve never noticed before -- but Blaine singing to Kurt in the courtyard has always had to do with change.  

Somewhere Only We Know - Kurt comes back to McKinley, and he and Blaine area separated.  

It’s Not Unusual - Blaine comes to McKinley and they’re together again

It’s Time - Kurt goes to New York and Blaine stays and they’re separated.

Got to Get You Into My Life - They sing together, and Blaine goes to New York with Kurt, and (despite another break up inbetween) they’re together for good.  

OMG you guys - I don’t know if I should credit Glee with this much cleverness. 

Anyway - this song is about changes (and not changing), and while it’s very much about Blaine - it’s about Kurt, too.  Because, essentially it /is/ his time to grow up and change and go down the scary path towards adult hood.  

It's time to begin, isn't it? I get a little bit bigger but then I'll admit I'm just the same as I was Now don't you understand I'm never changing who I am

But thing I find interesting about this song, is the message of staying the same through that change.  Kurt’s going to go through a lot of hard things, but he remains, as ever, himself.  Which is pretty cool. 

Also, I want to note the playful nature of this performance.  The cups, the jumprope, the goofing around -- it’s very childlike.  And, while that’s very Blaine, and I may be stretching this a little, it’s also a commentary about their relationship, too.  Up until this point, they’ve had a very childlike, innocent, fairy tale romance.  Sure, there were a few cracks in season 3, but things are going to fall a part very, very soon.  And in that, the childlike nature is ending.  

So yeah, this is all bittersweet, and a goodbye to Klaine as we know it.  Which makes this scene a lot sadder in retrospect. 

I wonder if it was intentional or not to have this moment mirror the Somewhere Only We Know moment.  But yeah, all through this song, Kurt watches Blaine, and is amused, and delighted, and sad, and wistful, and very much in love.  Kurt’s heart very much wants to go to New York - but it’d be disingenuous to disregard how much he’s going to miss Blaine, too. 

Also - this scene cuts off quickly, and that’s because there are two bits of dialogue missing.  

Kurt: I’m going to miss you so much.  You really are a star.  Blaine: And you’re mine. You always will be. 

Why would you cut that, Glee? Why??

Leaving On a Jet Plane

There’s a thing where Blaine and Burt are somewhat alike.  Because they both know that sometimes, you have to give Kurt the push in the ass that he needs. 

Oh. That sounded better in my head. 

What I mean, though, is this.  One reason Kurt didn’t get on a plane and head to New York over the summer is because he’s scared.  Because failure is a thing that haunts Kurt, even if he doesn’t always like to admit it, even if he presents himself with the best confidence.  He is human, after all, like the rest of us.  And, god, going to New York without a plan is, really, kind of insane.  But Burt does have a point -- it is an adventure, it’s how you learn to make your way in the world.  If you don’t go out there and try, then you’ll never know if you’ll be successful or not.  

And the longer this scene goes on, the more hesitant Kurt is to go on.  And Burt is just amazing.  Because his heart is breaking to see his kid off, but he knows it’s in Kurt’s best interests.  And he knows Kurt well enough to say just what Kurt needs to hear to get him out the door.  It really is a fantastic, sweet little scene - that is the epitome of what these two have been through the past few years, and the strong bond they’ve grown since then.  

Kurt: You really are the worlds greatest dad.  Burt: I know, it’s written on the mug you got me for father’s day. 

Burt tells Kurt he can always come home - but I think part of being a parent is letting your kids go - and go on to live their own lives.  Burt breaks down a little, and Kurt looks back, but the path is already set.  

New York

Oh this scene...  Kurt arrives in New York, and naturally the first thing he does is find Rachel.  It’s probably the smartest thing he does, because man, guys, just as an FYI - if you’re moving out to NYC, do plan a little.  Kurt’s plan is seriously insane.  

And, you know, I’ve kinda resented this scene for a long time.  Because it has this rom-com feel to it, like you know, lovers who meet up at the end of the movie.  And after not having much romantic Klaine, it was irksome when I first watched it.  I don’t know if I necessarily feel the same way anymore.  I mean, god, time, what have you done! Lol.  It doesn’t feel as rom-com-ish, nor does Klaine feel not that romantic (geez, there’s some great Klaine stuff in this episode, you just have to look).  

But -- I will say, this kicks off season 4 Hummelberry, which might be even more frustrating than season 3.  Kurt’s less indulgent this year, though, and that helps. 

So yeah -- Kurt’s in New York, ready to start this new portion of his life.  Poor kid, it’s not going to be easy for him.  But it’s going to be a fascinating ride... 

[alexisdacoco-blog]

Skincare routine

For the past few months since moving back here to the US, my skin has only gone worse because of the weather here in Arizona. My face was always so dry and flaky and I even broke out more than usual whenever that time of the month is near. I’ve tried quite a few but nothing seems to be working for me and it became really frustrating. But fortunately, after so many products, I finally found the ones that were working so well for me since then. And here they are:

First off, I remove my mascara and my eyeliner using the Simple Micellar Cleansing Water with a cotton pad and then the Dickinson’s Original Witch Hazel Daily Refreshingly Clean Cleansing Cloths on the rest of my face and neck.

The Simple brand micellar water is the second one I’ve tried so far, I have been using the Garnier one for some time but after finding out that it contains the banned and potentially cancer-causing PHMB, I stopped using it immediately. (better safe than sorry) this brand does the job but honestly, I don’t find anything special about it. I chose this because their company claims to be cruelty-free and it doesn’t contain PHMB. Also, their line is reasonably affordable and the bottle will last you for a few months depending on your usage, of course. 

As for the cleansing cloths, the Dickinson’s brand is known for their Witch Hazel toners (it will do wonders for you btw, especially if you have acne-prone skin) and I saw this at Walgreens and decided to give it a try and I’m happy I picked it up. It really gives you a refreshing feel and afterwards, your skin feels so smooth and tight. It does have a scent to it but for me, I don’t really find it bothersome.

After I remove all of my makeup, I have to wash my face of course. For the longest time, I’ve always wanted to try Kiehl’s but their products were too expensive for me. But after deciding to invest and save for skincare, I was finally able to get them. Kiehl’s has a LOT of products but only because they have several lines for different types of skin concerns (I have combination skin). If you’re not so sure what to pick up, I suggest you go to their actual store instead of ordering online and just basing on customer reviews. As for me, I was brave enough to choose their Rare Earth line after doing my research online. So this is their deep pore daily cleanser and let me tell you, it is the only cleanser that improved my skin and I’ve tried sooooo many different brands in the past and they were all either a hit and miss. This one exfoliates though and other people might think, “isn’t it bad to exfoliate your skin everyday?” yes, correct. But this one has super tiny micro beads and isn’t even harsh on your skin, a little amount will do well as long as you make sure your skin is damp before you apply it since it does claim to have amazonian clay and the consistency of the product is hard to spread out if applied to your skin if it isn’t wet. My skin feels smooth and clean after using it and I noticed that my pores weren’t that much visible and I just really like it overall.

And before I go to bed, I apply two drops of the Kiehl’s Midnight Recovery Concentrate and massage it all over my face. This serum is a miracle. It has made my skin so soft and firm and it also has that “glowing” look to it. It has a calming scent to it too. I received two deluxe samples of it and I know that I will be purchasing a full-sized bottle once I’m done with the mini ones.  It has so many benefits and being in my middle 20′s it’s good to actually start using serums to combat the fine lines and wrinkles that are waiting for me in a few more years. LOL but yeah, I’m really in love with this serum and glad that Kiehl’s sent me samples to try this one out.

And lastly, face masks. I’m not really a fan of using sheet masks and it’s only been just recently since I decided to actually try clay masks. The first one I’ve tried is the L'Oreal Paris Pure Clay Mask in Purify and Mattify since I have oily skin, I chose this mask because they say it’s the one that works specifically for that type and I have to agree on that. I apply this all over my face and it’s a light green color as it dries but after a few more minutes, you can see it starts to work it’s wonders and the areas where I mostly get oily at (t-zone and chin) turn into a moss green color as if it really draws out all the nasty stuff under those areas. Haha. I just rinse it with lukewarm water after leaving it on for 30 minutes and pat my skin dry. Since this bottle will only last me a few more uses, I decided to get another one but this time it’s the Kiehl’s Rare Earth Deep Pore Cleansing Masque this mask is thinner in consistency and a 125ml bottle will definitely last you a long time. It says to keep it on for 15 minutes but I wanna do 30 so yeah, I rinse it off and pat my face dry. I use each of these masks once every week and as soon as I finish my L’Oreal one, I will be using the rare earth mask twice a week. So, which one is better? I’d say the one from Kiehl’s of course! It really will give you a fresh clean feeling after and you will notice that your skin is visibly brighter as if the “toxins” were really drawn out. And it is not as drying compared to the L’Oreal mask and was also easier to rinse off.

When it comes to skincare it really is difficult to find which one will actually work and I’m glad I found a routine that is working for me. I will keep investing on skincare products and switch to another routine after some time too. And also, what’s good about it is that almost any foundation goes on beautifully on my skin since I started my routine and that alone makes me want to invest on it even more. 

Thanks for reading my super long post and I’ll catch you on my next one! 

xx

Alexis

[theglossier]

On My Makeup Table: 5 Liquid Foundations I Love

5 FOUNDATIONS THAT I’M OBSESSED WITH

Before the year gets too far along, and I acquire more makeup, I thought it would be a great idea to look through my current stash, and talk about some products that I can’t do without! Foundation is an important category for me, because I’m not one of those girls with naturally flawless skin, so I always need help getting an even, yet natural base. It’s also a category that’s been difficult for me in the past, because I have combo-oily, break-out prone skin, and the hyperpigmentation left over to prove it.

In the past, my foundations have been quite heavy, and quite wrong for me in terms of shade-matching—but luckily, many brands are wising up to the needs of their consumers, and are finally creating products with varying shades, and coverage, without the heaviness of traditional full-coverage makeup.

With trying on so many different ones throughout the years, I can easily decipher which ones work for me and which ones don’t. Basically, I know a winner when I apply one—which is why, the following five foundations are ones that I know I can re-purchase, and recommend to you guys without hesitation!

NARS ALL DAY LUMINOUS WEIGHTLESS FOUNDATION

The formula for this foundation really blew my mind the first time I tried it—I couldn’t understand how they were able to achieve such a high amount of coverage with only one drop of their foundation. The result, is medium-high coverage that looks and feels extremely lightweight.

This has a very beautiful matte-finish, and is oil-free, so for my combo-oily people this is for you! I find that the less you use, the more beautiful, and longer it will wear throughout the day—it’s easy to want to over-do it, but one (maybe two) pump is really all you need for your whole face.

Application Tip: Brushes are my preferred method of application, but this formula looks even better when applied with fingers.

NARS All Day Luminous Weightless Foundation, $49 — I’m shade New Orleans.

THE ORDINARY COLOURS SERUM FOUNDATION

You’re going to see a very common thread on this list, and it’s that I’m obsessed with lightweight formulas. When my hyperpigmentation was at its worse, I always gravitated towards foundations that I could literally spackle on, but now, even though I still have some spots, I really only stick to things that look and feel as light as possible.

I bought both formulas of Colours foundation by The Ordinary, and I thought I would love the Coverage one the most (it’s still really good, btw!), but the Serum foundation really won me over. Much like the NARS foundation, it’s oil-free, and has a high amount of pigmentation packed into one pump.

It’s actually very comparable to some high-end foundations in terms of finish, and lasting-power, and the best part is, this only costs $7! I love a bargain, and especially, one that performs so well for me.

Colours Serum Foundation, $7 — I’m shades 3.2N & 3.2R.

FENTY BEAUTY PRO FILT’R FOUNDATION

Pro Filt’r has been in heavy rotation in routine, since it dropped in 2017. I immediately took a liking to the finish, which legitimately had me shook. It gave me, and continues to give me, such an even yet natural-looking base.

I did find that even though I have oilier skin, and this is formulated to help control oil (and it’s even humidity and sweat-resistant), that you still need to prep with a moisturizer or moisturizing primer. The foundation will glide much more easily over your skin if it’s not dry, and it will give you a bit more time to blend before it sets. Speaking of blending, I love how nicely this blends into my skin, and never looks like it’s sitting on top of it. I hate when that happens!

I can’t forget to mention that this now comes in FIFTY different shades (they’ve recently expanded from the original forty), which makes it the most diverse foundation in range on this list, and in general.

Application Tip: Add a drop of oil to the foundation for a thinner, more luminous finish.

Fenty Beauty Pro Filt’r Foundation, $34 — I’m shade 440.

MAC COSMETICS FACE & BODY FOUNDATION

When I first got this foundation, I really regretted it. As I mentioned, I was used to practically painting on an entirely new face, and this one is so watery, so sheer, and so dewy that I thought I’d never be able to wear it, and that I should return it.

I got it because I was frustrated with the Cake Face life, and I really had to make adjustments to how I apply makeup, in order for this to work for me. When I finally mastered the application—prime, stipple on the base, spot conceal, under-eye conceal, powder—I couldn’t stop wearing it.

This is really great for those days when you just want to look super-natural and casually pulled-together. If you’re patient with this, and really learn how to work with it, it’s a beautiful addition to anyone’s makeup table.

Application Tip: For oily skin, use a mattifying primer beforehand, and set your oily zones with loose setting powder. Leave the highpoints of your cheekbones un-powdered for a super-natural glow!

MAC Cosmetics Face & Body Foundation, $31 —I’m shade N9.

GIORGIO ARMANI LUMINOUS SILK FOUNDATION

If I have one regret about this foundation, it’s that I didn’t try it sooner. I’ve avoided anything claiming to be luminous for years, because I thought the oils in my skin would just break it down, and make me look like a mess. Luminous Silk is a cult classic, and even still, I was fully prepared to be disappointed by it—but, it blew me away.

Of all the foundations on this list, this one looks the most skin-like—and I feel like they’re all on a natural-finish spectrum, Luminous Silk looks like I have nothing on at all. Luminous Silk gives me the skin I would have, if my skin knew how to behave itself.

I love that this is a medium-coverage, which can be built up, without looking cakey. It sets to a nice satin-finish, giving just the right amount of luminance for a youthful, healthy-looking radiance. I never regret wearing this, because it always looks so damn good!

Application Tip: Use your fingers to apply! Linda Cantello, International MUA for Armani Beauty, says people of darker complexions should use multiple shades, placed at various parts of your face to create an even more realistic, multi-dimensional look.

Armani Luminous Silk Foundation, $64 —I’m shades 13, and 13.5.

That’s the rundown of my top five favorite foundations, and I’d love to hear what are some of yours are! Do any of mine make it onto your list?

[lukerhill]

Treat YOself with these favorites of mine!

Hello my friends! ONE WEEK!! Ahhh! :) I'm actually pretty ahead of the game this year...the past couple of years I've been a bit more on top of things and it's been SO very nice to relax more during the season. I've completely let go of certain things like baking the perfect goodies (unless we just want some cookies), or sending out Christmas cards. I've learned over the years that I want to enjoy the season too -- instead of running around like a chicken! Hence the reason for this post -- if you are like most women I know, you stress a lot about making everything just right for everyone this time of year. But you need to treat yourself too. "Best day of the year!!" -- if you don't know that quote, be sure to check out this video. 😂 (One of the best shows EVER, btw.) So I've gathered a few of my favorite "treat yoself" items that you may want to check out for yourself. They are all products I use often, most of them every week, if not daily. I love them and I think you will too! First up, my favorite nail polish. I get a gel manicure a couple times a year and love the look, but I don't get them more often because they tear up my nails. I discovered the Sally Hansen gel a couple years ago and it's the only nail polish I use anymore. It doesn't last nearly as long as a gel manicure at the salon, but it does last longer than a regular manicure. I've had my nails painted since Saturday and they look like this today:

This color is called Red-y Set Run (affiliate) and it's my new favorite -- it's a pretty red with a slight sparkle. It's perfect for the holidays!

You use the color (two coats) as the first step, then cover it with step two, which is a clear coat. The paint holds up really well -- even better than the regular nail polish you can get at the salon. Also, it comes off with regular nail polish remover. 

I get mine at the drug store or any department store. You can find the color options here and the top coat here. 

I shared this hair tool a few weeks ago in my favorite things post before Thanksgiving, and it continues to be one of my all time fave beauty finds...ever: 

It's basically a crimper like the old days (if you're old enough to remember the 80's like me). BUT it's much bigger...so it gives you big, beautiful, beachy waves instead of the tight look from back then. 

You can see the "wave" shape here: 

EVERY single time I use it, I get compliments on my hair. I LOVE IT so much. I got mine here but it's on a big time sale at Target right now! 

About a year ago, I went searching for one of those monthly subscription services that delivers beauty products. I tried two different ones -- one let me sign up (including paying), and then told me I was on a wait list. (But I could share on Facebook to be moved up -- nope!) I found another one and filled out the survey for items I preferred. The first box included basically everything I said I didn't want...and they were all tiny, baby sizes. 

Soooo. I used a code to get the Fab Fit Fun box for cheaper, and I've been hooked ever since. I was thrilled when they asked me to work with them earlier this year -- I've done that a couple times now: 

Every item is FULL sized. They range from makeup to jewelry to items for the house to beauty products like masks and lotions. I absolutely LOVE every single box I've gotten. Because I work with them, you can use code TDC10 at this link and get $10 off your first box. 

I'm a mask nut -- for my face and also my hair now -- I love trying different versions. My favorite masks are the peel off versions because I feel like they clean my face better. Some are a little extreme with the peeling though -- they can hurt!

I found this peel-off mask a few weeks ago and love it. It smells divine, it's easy to apply and to take off. It peels easily and any excess is easy to wash off: 

I found mine at Old Navy but it's cheaper at Target. 

This next item is the most expensive on the list -- but it's one I've used nearly every single day for a couple years now. I've had step-tracking watches before, but none of them were nice looking. I'd only wear them for working out. 

I saw this Garmin version at the store one day and loved the look of it...and then realized it has a ton of awesome options as well:   

It has a white rubber band with a pretty rose gold face. I get compliments on it ALL the time. 

Then I show people what it does and they love it even more!: 

It tracks steps, calories, stairs, stress, heart rate...all of it. You can also read texts on it and answer your phone calls (your phone just needs to be close so you can talk). It's the only watch I wear because it looks great with any outfit. 

Mine has been banged around when I work on DIY projects and the glass is still perfect. I found mine here but it's on sale here right now. Love it!!

This one is another hair tool and it's tied with the wave artist for my favorite! It's the Revlon one step hair dryer and volumizer: 

I really need to stop watching hair tutorials cause I keep finding good stuff! Ha! Both items were awesome finds though. I use this one on damp hair -- you just run it through your hair (it has a low and high setting) and it dries it quickly and gives your hair CRAZY good volume. 

Also, I haven't used my flat iron in over a month...there's no need with this. It leaves my hair super soft with tons of LIFE...I just love it. It has a cool setting that sets your hair too. Another great aspect when I use this is that my hair looks great the next day. Still straight and looks pretty darn good after brushing. 

The only complaint I have about it is that my wrists hurt when I use it sometimes. 😂 It's not super heavy but after a few minutes it starts to get a little awkward. I LOVE it though and highly recommend it! I got mine at Target but you can also find it here. I think you'll love it!

And my final item...that I saved for last because I love it so. I came across these pjs last year on a shopping trip. I'm typically NOT a person who spends money on pajamas, but these were on sale and I thought they felt so soft and cozy. 

I have since ordered another set because I love them so much. The "cool nights" pjs are a thinner option and are SO wonderful: 

I tend to get hot at night -- and I sleep best in a chilly room. I never sweat in these...they are amazing! They have so many cute options too. I love that the sizes are generous and comfy. They definitely run big so err on going a bit smaller if you're between sizes. I also have the embraceable pjs that are even more comfy. They are a jersey material and are a bit warmer, but I can still wear them in the summer without getting hot. Again, the options are so cute and they are PERFECT for lounging around with some hot chocolate on a winter weekend. (I know because I've done it!) They wash up beautifully too. They are on sale right now! There you go! These are a few of my favorite things. ;) I highly recommend them all and think you should treat yoself for the holidays. Of course they all make great gifts too! Do you have any of these items? Anyone get the wave artist after my last post about it? I'll be back later this week and then will be taking next week off to spend with family. Happy shopping/baking/wrapping!!

This content is property of Thrifty Decor Chick LLC. If you are reading this on any other site other than https://ift.tt/1kRxOJ2 or one of her social media platforms, please contact her immediately (thriftydecorchick at gmail dot com). Any other use of this content is strictly forbidden.

[myblacktruth-wakeup-post-blog]

Colorism Pt 1

Before I begin, I want to explain what colorism is to those who genuinely don’t know. Colorism is discrimination based on skin color/tone, typically shared among people of the same race/ethnicity.

And Young Thug Posted...

BTW that message wasn't to all my black women…… it was to those two black burnt women — Young Thug ひ (@youngthug) December 8, 2016

I didn't write this post because I saw entertainers trashing black women for their physical attributes and because they used common stereotypes against them like 'dark women have worst credit than lights'. I wrote it because colorism is a BIG ISSUE that keeps popping up that darker skinned people are less intelligent, least likely to get jobs or have occupations of the lower status, smaller chances of having successful relationships/marriage, tend to struggle more from depression, leaders in substance abuse, and are generally more likely to have a fucked up life. While, of course, the lighter skinned counterparts with more acceptable hair textures, thinner noses, lighter eyes, and more so called "European features" tend to have the exact opposite, due to them being associated with beauty, intelligence, education, being more economically stable, trustworthy, less fearful of, and overall given better opportunities, resulting in a better life. But colorism is bias, because it is based off of prejudice views an individual has for their race purely off of their skin tone. Pre-ju-dice - means that you are PRE-JUDGING somebody based off what you heard, your personal experiences, or simply plain ignorance. The media doesn't help either. It basically gives self hating keyboard warriors the chance to make generalized statements (mostly putting down their men and women for whatever reason), and the only consequence that takes place is when Black Twitter goes on it's usual rampage with (sometimes) even more ignorant comments that make us all look stupid. All shit like this does is start arguments and division; it's like you're okay with trolling your own race. Sad thing about it is that the black community is rarely trolling, but rather expressing the deep internalized self hate they have within themselves, passing it on to the next generation as well. There's even a YouTube video with a group of little black girls who were asked to choose between the lighter and darker skin tones. Then when the little girls leaned to the lighter tones, commenters made excuses saying that it's their 'preference' but what do you think that child thinks about her own dark skin when she rather choose a tone four shades lighter over her own? This doesn't only apply to AMERICAN BLACK WOMEN, considering there are multiple different people in other countries with darker skin tones who have invested their money into purchasing bleaching products. In almost every beauty store in Jamaica, bleaching products, creams, and skin lightening soaps pile up in numbers, filling up the shelves as quickly as they disappear. 

Beauty store in Nigeria - Apparently not all African women believe "black is beautiful" 

 To tell the truth even through all this exposure, people who have their minds so strongly set on European beauty tend to be harder to open up, meaning that consciously they are programmed to be attracted to light skin over dark. Then there are many black women and men who have been bullied for so long so the hatred spewed against them becomes internalized. Dark skin has been ridiculed, demonized, and laughed at for centuries, and now we are doing it to each other, calling each other names like "roach" and "burnt." I've seen some pretty ass dark skin girls that turned to bleaching and went from having rich, melanated skin to appearing ghostly or ashy. The after effects of skin bleaching are horrible. It can lead to skin cancer, skin discoloration, and sometimes (depending on which region you live in), it can cause your skin to get even darker. In multiple countries, people view light skins as beauty and having more opportunities, light being good and dark being "bad" or evil. Several religions including Christianity, Judaism, and Islam follow similar ideologies. Black people are making a fool out of themselves every time they rub bleaching cream on their naturally melanated skin. It's disrespectful to your ancestors who got you to be able to walk in the country without being chained, beat to death in huge numbers, and be in non segregated public places. Those people who marched for your ass and you gonna spit in their face by wiping out that brown skin with harmful chemicals that can give you cancer? 

You praising the people who raped your ancestors everyday when you show your preference for Caucasian features. You talk about being equal but then you divide us with this #teamlightskin #teamdarkskin bullshit. And if you think I'm being harsh or over exaggerating, tell me when did any of that matter to most black people during the civil rights movement? Rosa parks was light skin, Martin Luther King was brown skin, Malcolm X was a light skinned black man with red hair and they all contributed to try to fight for freedom, but meanwhile the only fight we got left in us is against each other! Instead of trying to build businesses we wanna talk about who lives in the better neighborhoods, whose wearing the newest sneakers, who has the most education, light skin vs. Dark skin, light skin girls are pretty and dark skin girls are ugly, light skin girls are egotistical and dark skin girls are all insecure... Dark skin men are thieves, while light skin men are more trustworthy and less feared. Even some of the ones who date black men/women still battling over skin tones instead of being down for each other. And I know there is more to building a relationship, but people need to figure out the deep rooted issues that a person has BEFORE they start dating or even worse marrying them. You can be in a interracial relationship and STILL be a closeted racist, a black man who dates black women, but has issues with the features of that same woman (I saw a YouTube video of a black guy that hated when his wife started wearing her natural hair verses the weaves. He said he liked her better in weaves and I have heard this statement many times). 

Meanwhile, white people sit back and either watch us tear each other down, mind their own business, or join. This discriminating against each other needs to stop--it looks ignorant and sounds very ignorant regardless of whether or not you find it to be a joke. I’ve seen evil/ugly in every race, color, nationality, and ethnicity. I’ve seen good/beauty in all of them as well. Now while I’m not saying that the black community doesn’t have issues that need to be resolved, arguing about something as simple as skin color is petty when we can be working on ourselves, but most people rather be concerned with fending for themselves in search of success, thus putting cash and financial stability over racial issues.

Besides, what’s wrong with this?

[topbeautyguide]

NeutraLuxe Lash MD – The Way To Get Longer Lashes

Today I’ll be talking about NeutraLuxe Lash Growth Serum that seemed a bit controversial when I did my research on it before trying it out myself. There were many people saying it did work for them, many stating the opposite, leaving me with a huge question mark hanging over my head. Since I didn’t know what to believe in, I did what I always do, see with my own eyes, so I just clicked the ‘add to cart’ button on Amazon and practically paid for my lashes to grow faster.

How Does NeutraLuxe Lash MD Work?

NeutraLuxe Lash actually works more as an enhancer rather than a grower. From what I experienced, it is best to be used by those who do not have their lashes damaged, but only naturally thin lashes that they want to enhance a bit more without the use of damaging mascara that can easily make them disappear. The combination of scientifically tested ingredients helps to nourish and moisturize your lashes while protecting from breakage. It will make them darker, bolder and thicker. About length, it’s really individual from what I’ve seen.

If interested in using it for your brows, to be honest I haven’t tried using it on my eyebrows, but I read reviews from customers who already tried and had no luck with it.

One other thing that I really liked about this product is its mildness. I stumbled upon no complaints on allergies, redness or eye sourness of any kind in customers but also I personally didn’t experience anything of that sort while using it.

NeutraLuxe Lash MD Instructions:

Once daily, after washing your face and eye area thoroughly, apply a thin layer of nutraluxe md lash to the base of your upper eyelashes. The brush enables you to Apply as you would apply eyeliner, but do not extend beyond the lid. Do not double dip because once is really enough for both eyes, and try not to apply to the lower lid or waterline.

Neutraluxe Lash MD Before And After Photos:

Also, another one I received from a customer who used the NutraLuxe. She doesn’t have a before photo, only an after one, but you can definitely see some spectacular eyelashes right there!

Where To Buy NutraLuxe Lash MD Serum?

As I said, I found mine on Amazon for the price of $35, but recently I saw Sephora doing some promotions on it as well as nutraluxemd.com.

NutraLuxe Lash MD Serum Reviews:

Hope what I found as user testimonials will be of use for you in making the right decision:)

“I have been using this product for almost a year now and will continue to for as long as possible. There are a few tips I have for people that have not seen results. Do not use more than once a day your lashes will fall out. Thats from experience. You do not need more than one dip. One dip is enough for both eyes. Use everyday for results. It will take about 3 weeks for you to see the progress. Take a before and after photo to show your self. Warning: be very cautious on who you purchase from. This merchant has been reliable thus far. The actual website for the makers charges a ridiculous amount for shipping btw. I get so many compliments about my lashes. And get asked all the time if they are real. Enjoy if used properly.”

Martinez

“With the years the hormones decreases causing thinner hair, eye brows and eye lashes, etc. but this is the only product that truly delivers what it sells. You should see my eye lashes, they are stronger and growing day by day. I applied it at night before going to bed and my eyes look very nice. Ladies you’ll never be sorry you purchased this wonderful product. And I am over the age of 70”

Elizabeth

“Definitely works. I saw major results after 3 months of religious application. Be careful not to get any in your eyes or else your eyes will be somewhat red the next day. I did also have discoloration around my lids which made me appear a bit more tired, but it would only last a day. Small price for a product that made my lashes noticeably longer. (I’m Asian so for people to compliment the length of my lashes is pretty good, I’d say)”

Jen

“Seems it works. Slow, but does.”

Ksana

from Top Beauty Guide http://topbeautyguide.com/neutraluxe-lash-md-the-way-to-get-longer-lashes/

[freakypumpkin]

heya, it's the anon from the other day!! thank you so much for replying and i must say, your answer was so fucking interesting and i must've read it like 5 times or so by now. everything you explained about your creative process and personal history with drawing was fascinating and i think i can say that you truly inspired me to try and perseverate, so thanks again! i have another question i forgot to ask, about colors, and again it's about how you visualize them. i find it pretty hard -(1)

-(2) when i look around me to differenciate which color is what; by that, i mean that i can’t really put a name on colors, especially if it’s sort of gray, to me it will look gray even though it’s actually dark blue if you were to pick it out with the eyedropper tool. and i just can’t imagine how you color and shadow things without a reference, like how do you figure out the exact hue you should put there ? i’m kinda rambling here but it just blows my mind how you can make realistic looking -

-(3) drawings and get the textures and shadows and tones all great?? like, for instance, your mermen malec piece; the tails are so beautiful? how do you manage to get the darkest and the lightest parts right, it’s so hard to imagine the scene and reproduce it?? i’m just in love with what you do at this point. about drawing from pictures, i feel like i can do it alright but i can’t help but feel like i’m not a “real artist” because of that, because i don’t exactly “create” something from scratch-

-(4) i’ve even been told by people that if i wasn’t drawing things without ref, it was because i wasn’t confident enough (love it when people think they know how you work and who you are and feel free to pass judgement upon it!). i’ve seen that you useddifferent papers for the rough sketches and the lineart pieces that come after, so i was also wondering what kind of paper you used for the first sketches? does the paper quality matter for them since they’re not final product? and i think that’s-

-(5? or 6) that’s it ! again, i hope you’re having a great day and i wish you the best ! love ya

Hey there :D 

I’m glad I managed a answer of some quality :3 and reading, that it made you want to keep going totally made my morning.

You do create things from scratch, my friend. You start with a blank page and have a drawing in end, right? There you go. Wether or not you have a reference, you still have to draw the picture yourself, it’s not that with having a picture to copy from, the lines suddenly start appearing on the page. ;3

And when people say, you lack confidence because you draw from reference, I would say, that you simply find beauty in the things, that exist in the world around you and you want to capture that. And I would say, in terms of bravery, it is pretty brave to draw something people can compare to the original. Taking on reality is brave. Also, on that same note, I personally decided, that you will always be the only one to completely understand your art. You create art for yourself, it’s a part of you and a form of expression, that will never be completely open to others, and is surprisingly intimate in certain aspects, I think. So, who cares? (If they offer constructive criticism, great, if their comments are harmful to you, don’t listen.)

Sidenote: Classmates used to mock me for drawing non-realistically, with the big eyes and the non-natural colored hair and my mother was always like ‘do they have to have this pointed chins?’. Somebody is always going to be ‘Oh, that’s not real art’. But at some point, I decided, that there are so many different kinds of art and art forms, why shouldn’t what I create not be found somewhere on that spectrum?

About the colors … it’s a learning curve. xD One of the reasons I started working with grey tones is, that this way, I only have to look for the shading and not the color combination, because I am not good at that. I have like a few color combinations, that I know will work and I tend to use them whenever I use colors at all. I have a few cheating strategies, like combining colors with black or grey, or only using grey tones and then you can put in a pop of any color you want to create a certain ‘dramatic effect’. In general, I would say, just try it out. Like, I have papers filled with random patches of colors, where I drew one marker over another and just looked at what happened. So yeah, there’s a lot of experimenting in it on my part. And I think, being able to see colors is a question of training, too. 

By now i have a collection of all different kinds of paper, I just like paper and trying out different kinds of paper. The yellowish one I usually make my sketches on is a bit thinner (90g or 61 lb) than the white one I use for the clean linearts (185 g) and the difference is just that. Both are labeled as sketch paper and I can use markers on both of them, but on the sketch-paper, I feel less pressured to make a perfect drawing and I just don’t like pencil marks from erased lines on the white one. I did some lineart on the yellowish paper, too, and if i needed thinner paper for tracing of a sketch via lightbox, I wouldn’t have an issue with taking the yellowish one. :) 

Specifically about that mermaid-drawing I have to add, that I have no real experience with water colors at this point. Whatever you see turned out good on the picture in the end is often a case of me going ‘Let’s see, what happens when I do this’ and stuff turning out semi-successful. For the tails I had references at the start. I mean, not for that particular picture, but in general. They are based on the tails of tropical fish. So, when talking about the shading, It’s a lot about looking at pictures of fish and adapting the shades from there. Where fins overlap, there are shadows, etc. (Pinterest is awesome for that, btw)And I also usually wet the area I want to paint first and then dip the brush in paint and put it at a point in a corner, where I know will be a shadow and due to the formerly applied water, the color spreads out itself and I just help a bit with the brush, I think. I mostly follow the form of whatever I’m coloring; going from one side of the tail to the other with a slight curve and the farther I get, the more the brush will run out of color and there’s the effect. I usually put shadows at the edges and where fins overlap the tail to add depth, but there’s really not any kind of detailed plan behind it, especially with water colors. 

When it’s with skin, there are just some general areas where I like adding shadows, which is around the eyes, under the eyebrows, wherever the hair falls, underneath the chin and on the lips and nose. I saw that kind of shading in a lot of other drawings, and kind of just adapted it. If you would look closer, I’m pretty sure, that most of them would not be as they are if you’d be going for natural lighting. But I like it and therefore I will keep putting them there. :3Shadows with water colors for me work the way of using more or less of the same color and with copics I have the advantage of them being numbered according to their hue of a certain color. So, light grey is C-1 and it goes darker through C-2, C-3, C-5, and so on, and this way, when I use C-2 as a base color, I will use C-3 for the shadows and C-5 for the darkest parts of those shadows. 

But all in all it’s a process. When you draw a lot fishes, for example from reference you start learning where shadows will most likely be and this way, you don’t need the reference material that close by if you’re not interested in copying it in detail. I think, you subconsciously learn how shadows work on a certain object at some point. It’s like learning a new form of math and in the beginning you will have to write down every little step you take, but when you’re secure enough in the method, you will start to skip them. Just give yourself time. 

As for textures it’s again about looking at reference material. To learn about how shadows work on different kinds of material, working on how to translate that with whatever material you’re using. Also, youtube tutorials are great as well. Just keep in mind, that you don’t have to do things exactly as shown on the video, just look if you can learn something new from it, that feels like it could work for you. 

And I tell you, copying from nature and life is one the most useful things you can do. Writers work with research material and rerference material is the research of artists. Never let yourself get talked down for doing that. You wouldn’t call a writer ‘not a real writer’ just because they wrote something about a real story, right? :) It’s simply another genre. And they don’t write about things, that really happened beacuse they aren’t confident enough, it’s just, that they like what they write about and they also have to start with a blank page and therefore from scratch. Just the same way, you are a real artist. :)

Creating art is constant work and practice. Something will always be a challenge and somebody will always be better than you. The most important thing is, that you don’t give up if you really want to do it and that at some point you reach that feeling of ‘I like my art’. That should be your goal :)

I hope this helped, feel free to ask if anything was left unclear. :) Have a great day!