#They had moments in the past that I should have paid attention ti

[nickywhoisi]

Okay I was gonna go without saying anything about this, but...I caved. I was planning to go my whole life without knowing anything about what really happens in the Mario Illumination movie, but I both got curious one time, and then just today, I had a trailer thrown in my face. Rant under the cut if you want to know my thoughts.

I could have skipped, but my damned curiosity got in the way of my mind. And now I feel like my curiosity in any IP I cherish is getting so irrecoverably punished. Because I saw a Luma, or this fake luma with a mouth, saying the most horrifying visceral things that I know do not belong in a kid's movie. "More meat for the grinder..." "The sweet release of death." In a way that did not convey some cheesy edge, but an actual declaration of violence through the screen. Like that character wad adressing all the viewers, and not at all in contextually appropriate ways. The disturbia, the disassociation i felt wss like reading a horrible mario fanfic but the author was a maladjusted teenager who was earnesy trying to threaten someone they know by invoking death words and mental images too gruesome for the material. If you've seen it, I am sorry, and you maybd have an idea of what I mean.

Just...between this and Bowigi, I am truly never spending money on a movie again. I can't. I just can't condone this. Nintendo has shat the bed for greenlighting this, I feel uncomfortable about how much responsibility Miyamoto and Charles Martinet have in these choices, I feel a deep chasm within myself being cast out from existence and being betrayed, and I wonder for what purpose did I reach out and connect with the Super Mario Bros as a series if somewhere down the line I was not to be repaid for that loyalty. I want Nintendo to just be a game company again. I want my most fond memory of completing Mario Galaxy to be honoured, not shat upon with Spark of Hope and this. Some people who I had respected were surely there, and someone had said yes to all of this...when they should have said no. I hate this so much. I have never known such engulfing hatred as this, and I lived under the thumb of an entire cabal of narcissistic relatives. But I made it out of that, somewhat! What about this? How can i possibly escape and cut ties with what I chose and what provided me such happiness for so long in my life? When did we all decide to stop having standards, and really ask for only the best renditions of what we know to be in our movies? I want Mario to remain pure, and not have that disgusting Pratt voice. I want Luigi and Peach to remain pure too, and not have wrong voices of their own. I knew Illumination was wrong to be collabing with the one company I've cared about the most. I want everyone to stop putting Bowser into uncomfortable forced relations with the human characters. I never liked how Peach was always shipped in porn-y ways with Bowser, and it is no better with Luigi. It may be even worse because I always saw him as so immensely pure a character, cut off from that! It's like crack shipping gone wrong! And do not get me started on the existential travesty I went through having to go through Bowsette.

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU ALL DOING TO ME, YOURSELVES, AND EVERYONE.

[hollowaluminumvessel]

Post-114 (Still Not Ferin Well) headcanons 🤗

long post, Hcs for gillion, Jay and chibo under the cut ♥

Gillion(real)

-since his lay on hands wasn't an immediate reaction, all of his missing skin and the holes in his hands became scar tissue.

-once they got back to the ship and everything was calm again, his hair was soooo ratty and knotted. The crew spent ages combing it out, washing out the blood and grime, and making sure it was tied up next time they did something like that.

-when doppelgilly was voided and became a husk, Gillion felt bad. He knew that he shouldn't, he knew that doppelgilly was some evil copy of himself but doppelgilly looked, acted, and felt like himself. It was like looking in a mirror.

-to chip, Jay, and the rest of the crew, he has literally never looked worse. He looks exhausted, he looks beaten. To gil thoigh, he thinks that hes seen worse. He hasnt. The moment he was healed, they sent him to the tub.

-he nearly fell asleep in the elevator, and then while Jay and Gryffon helped with his hair.

-Gillion WILL have lasting trauma and you are NOT changing my mind. I mean no chance he doesn't right?? A Triton literally said to him, WHILE CHAINED, "YOU ABANDONED US." COME ON BRO THATS NOT EVEN THE WORST OF IT

-when Gil was first taken, his neck literally broke. It's verbally stated that if he hadn't casted death ward, he would literally be dead. And he was yanked upwards, as if he were hanged. That bitch should be DEAD AF DAWG. DEAD

Jay

-Jay is second guessing herself like the sky literally fell and it's her fault. She's questioning her role, her right to be a leader, even her life. She spends that night crying as quiet as she can. It felt good, she hasn't had a good silent sob session in a few months. She needed to let it out.

-When Jay put together that Gillion was actually doppelgillion, the loud noises started happening and she fuckin BOOKED IT over to the leviathan room. She got them into this mess, if she didn't get them out she'd never forgive herself.

-when gillion was sent to the tub and the rest of the crew left to do whatever they pleased, chip held Jay back. He told her that it wasn't all her fault. He said that he doesn't blame her for indulging on information about her sister, because why else are they going to the hole in the sea? For laughs? No, it's for chip to do the same thing. They hug then. And then they go about their day/night.

-Jay's hair is singed. When they finished with Gillions hair, they turn to Jay's and cut it as short as she'll let them. Her hair used to be around waist length, as she'd ignored it for a while, only doing so much as to brush it every morning and night to prevent knotting, and goddamn that shit was greasy. She wasn't the only one though so they didn't put it past her. Her hair after the cut is probably upper back to shoulder length. Queen comes along and helps her style it so she doesn't look stupid like she thinks she does.

-she denies that she likes it at all. She's lying and they all know it.

Chip

-im gonna be so fr with myself and say I haven't paid the most attention to chibo so if I get anything character-wise wrong, mercy 🙏

-chips bones are weaker now, some even broken from when he opened the drawer and the ringing rang. Griz said it splintered through his bones, I'm not letting that go

-anyway think like Hector from coco. Some bones are split and broken, some are being held together with medical tape, etc. Basically he's more broken than ever.

-in the fight with the holloweds on the ship. One of them managed to get a lucky shot right on the hole in his chest where his heart should be. Later that night, it burns. He scratches, he rubs, he does anything he can to make the burn go away but nothing works. It seems to have lessened the next day though, so he's not worried.

-theres discolored bruising around his neck where the slimy tongue is.

-on the same note, chip was being dragged much slower, so his neck didn't break, but he was held much tighter.

-when chip told Jay it wasn't her fault, it was all he could do to keep from crying. Because deep down, he thinks it was his. He's the one taking them to the hole, he's the one that brought them into this mess in the first place. He wished he'd never met anyone on this ship, so at least they'd be safe, home, and away from this. He's disappointed in himself. He's angry and sad and he's so upset that he's putting his crew through this nonsense.

-chip thinks the fact that doppelgilly pulled some of the worst cards back to back was hilarious. Then he looks at gillion later on and sees how he's contemplating and he rethinks. He doesn't really change his mind, but he rethinks.

[leggerefiore]

How about some wedding/honeymoon headcannons for Cyrus, Larry, and whoever else you want? 💚

SO. I did Submas stuff for weddings already. So they're out, but you can read it here.

I tossed in some assorted person headcanons too... I hope that's alright lol

cw: sort of long?, fluff, weddings, proposals,

characters: Cyrus, Larry, Nanu, Grimsley

🌌Cyrus🛰

☄️ Marriage is admittedly something that he tries to avoid. Inherently, he sees nothing wrong with it. More so, he views it logically as a legal union between two people to make asset inheritance and division easier. The issue comes up due to his past with it. His parents had tried to force him into multiple arranged marriages. For people of his social standing, it was normal. Expected, even, but the thought of being legally tied to someone his parents had decided for him left him sleepless for many nights. Yet… when it came to you, his current partner, the idea was growing to bother him less and less. After his plans… went awry, he found himself even more comfortable with the idea. His plan had always been to propose the idea anyway. Which is what he did. Quite bluntly, he held his hand out to you and spoke, “Beloved, marry me and hold this hand.” It was not posed as a question – No, it was simply a statement. You had no intention of saying no, anyway.

☄️ A wedding was not at all on his mind. He saw no use in a decorative ceremony for what could just as easily be done within legal parameters in a more quiet and easy manner. You will just be added to his family registry. Simple as that. Nothing flashy or traditional – Legality only. Granted, he would allow a smaller party if that was what you wanted. It is more tame than a wedding and is composed of a few select friends and family members. Cyrus's side is lacking, to say the least, but his commanders show up, as does his grandfather, unexpectedly. The event is likely held somewhere at the Galactic building on a day off and makes the event almost feel like a weird office party. It is all a bit odd, but Cyrus was not exactly known for his normal proclivities. It is overall a good time, and you even awkwardly get to feed him cake while he tries to remain collected.

☄️ Cyrus struggles to comprehend why he should take a while off from work to enjoy his marriage. To him, it is illogical. Being married to you does not change your situation. You have lived with him for a while leading up to everything, so there is no adjustment period. Still, you clearly wanted it, so he would relent and take off work. It was to say no as well when Mars seemed to glare at him until he did. Her investment in his love life bewildered him. Even Jupiter seemed to get in on it. He almost felt forced out of the office and onto a vacation with you. His choice in location was originally going to be somewhere else in Sinnoh, but it changed when Mars and Jupiter suggested something more grand. Jubilife was not grand – It was a day trip.

☄️ Instead, you both went to Johto. Something about the traditional charm drew him in. It seemed like a quieter and more peaceful place as opposed to other options. He opts to stay in Ecruteak to allow you both to fully absorb the area's unique scenery. You both spend a lot of time in the inn that he somehow booked despite it apparently usually requiring months prior reservation. The old building's charm intrigued him. Yet, you both visited many of the different offerings of Johto. Goldenrod caught his attention quite thoroughly, but he seemed to enjoy the peace that both Ecruteak and Violet held. You both opted against Cianwood and Olivine for a few reasons.

☄️ The most memorable part was… climbing Mt. Silver. Cyrus's previous training paid off, and it was a fun bonding activity. It also made soaking in a hot bath at the inn all the better. A few day trips over to Kanto made the trip all the better, too. Ultimately, Cyrus felt glad he took the experience and deeply enjoyed the precious moments spent with you. Though, it was less of a honeymoon and more of a general vacation.

💼Larry🏢

🍙 Marriage crossed Larry's mind a few times over the years. It was something that he wanted aspired for at one point, but that had gone away as his work quickly became overwhelming and made meeting people outside of it difficult. His age was also a concern. Being middle-aged did not make marriage any easier to achieve. Yet, here he was, readying himself to propose exactly that. The stress swirled in his mind as his hands tied his tie from muscle memory alone. Rika had suggested something simple. A nice date out and then pulling out a ring in a quiet, isolated location.

🍙 He naturally asked you out to one of the nicer restaurants in Medali and planned to walk with you into a quieter part of the city to ask you. Dinner had gone well. Sharing a meal truly was one of the best ways to bond with another person… His confidence felt oddly higher as he brought you to the amphitheatre. The location was almost entirely deserted when he turned to you and fumbled down to one knee. The ring was brought out with all the stiffness expected of carrying a stack of papers. He made uncomfortable eye contact and cleared his throat, “… Marry me?” Despite everything, you were more than eager to take the ring and agree to his simple request.

🍙 He does not really care for anything wedding related. Truthfully, he was panicking thinking about how he could schedule it in to his itinerary. He expected Geeta to hear that he was engaged and dump extra work on him instantly in reply. Instead, she gave one of her polite smiles and a quiet applause for him. He was given a few days off, stating that it was about time for him to settle down. He still is not sure that he wants the stress of a ceremony. Though, he does relent if his partner asks specifically for one. He would only ask that it be a smaller one. For him, the part and parcel that matters most is simply signing the paperwork and having it notarised under the letter of the law. He would also be fine with a reception party afterwards. His fellow league members would likely pop in and happily chat about how they cannot believe the ageing man finally did it. He is just eating the food provided in the background. His favourite memory is you feeding him a slice of the wedding cake, at least.

🍙 Larry almost wants to beg to just take your honeymoon at home. He is exhausted, and having so much time off almost makes him want to sleep for the entirety of it. After all, it was not like your situation was heavily changed from anything. Legally, you were married, but he would not deny that he had basically begun to treat you like his spouse even before he thought about proposing. Though, for whatever reason, Poppy seemed to gush to Rika about how lucky it was for Larry, and you get to go on a romantic trip together. Rika then turned around and asked where he was going. The green-haired woman was shocked with his reply and essentially insisted on doing something – Even just getting out of Medali! He did relent, especially if you had previously asked about taking a trip for it.

🍙 Somehow, Alola becomes the settled location. Larry felt nervous about putting everything together but became intrigued when finally both landed in the tropical paradise. Hau'oli city was definitely a tourist area filled with the hustle and bustle of people. Yet, he felt the slow pace of the region began to sink into him as you both took a boat ride across to Akala island. The Tide Song Hotel was very accommodating and pleasant. He could almost sleep an entire day away in the bed, yet you absolutely made it clear that you desired his attention. The two of you ventured around to see the natural beauty provided by the islands and even found Larry a friend in a Drampa by accident. He felt as if Hassel was standing before him in pokemon form. There are even a few romantic moments spent together watching the ocean together from your hotel room's balcony or sitting together on the beach. Larry, however, would admit the food was the most memorable thing for him. He recalled some older look at him in shock as he ordered seconds at the Sushi High Roller. Ultimately, the honeymoon ends up more as a nice getaway than anything overly romantic, but it does have its moments.

🐈‍⬛️Nanu❤️‍🩹

🌑 Marriage… He does not think it ever really crossed his mind. It was not like he did not want it, but more so that his path in life did not exactly align with it. Marriage was far from his mind while he was an International Police officer, and then by the time he found himself back in Alola, he had the role of Kahuna forced on him. Love was not something he actively sought out, yet it found him. Marriage had not been something he considered until his heart had been captured by you. It felt strange to be considering a proposal at his age.

🌑 A ring was easy enough to get, but how did he do this? Hala said to just ask while Olivia suggested something grand. He felt exhausted while thinking about it. Yet, he did not want you to feel like he did not care. He found himself inviting you out to Route 14 just as the sun was beginning to set. His hand grasped the ring box in his pocket as he gazed at the water. Eventually, he found himself holding the ring box out to you while scratching the back of his head. “You can say no,” Nanu felt almost like you would. He worried that you were going to break a bone with how tightly you held him.

🌑 He dreaded the idea of a wedding ceremony. Alolan ones were often overly romanticised, but the idea stressed him out. The Tapu might even decides to make an appearance and make everything all the more exhausting. It almost felt like an obligation as a Kahuna, and you might even have your heart set on it. If you do, he will warn you clearly that the ceremony will have some odd moments. Despite that, if you still insist, he will obligate. It almost feels a bit like a festival with how all the other Kahunas and a few captains show up. Acerola was beyond excited to fill in as a flower girl. The officiant got scared by Tapu Bulu's loud cry when he allowed you to come together for an interesting ending. Nanu pressed his forehead to yours – not for a kiss – but for a shared breath. Apparently, it was a tradition. The Tapu seemed proud to see its choice of a Kahuna finally settling down. Nanu would admit that he enjoyed it despite the hassle in the end. The end of the wedding was followed by a feast, in which everyone seemed more than ready to congratulate the old man on his accomplishment. Hala gave a full laugh after saying his piece. The day was truly something joyous on Ula'Ula

🌑 Nanu did not understand the need for a honeymoon… First, he would have to get the Tapu's permission, which might get rejected, and then he would have to leave someone else in charge. He just wanted to accept the change in the comfort of your shared home. Besides, Alola was already considered the location for honeymooners. Most people paid insane amounts of money to spend time here. You lived here with him… Is that not enough? Olivia actually agreed with that one unexpectedly, too, but Acerola seemed to demand that you two take an actual trip. He struggled to even think of anywhere to go. Sure, his job used to take him all over, but now all he wanted was to stay and relax. Olivia suggests Unova. Tapu Bulu accepted his request. He could not escape this fate.

🌑 Unova ended up being the destination. Nanu was not unfamiliar with the region, but he would not say that he was overly familiar either. The region was busy, yet full of entertainment. Nimbasa was where you both found your honeymoon anchored. The city was vibrant and exciting. Nanu felt like he was in an entirely different world than the one that he had grown accustomed to in Alola. Yet, you both quickly took to exploring the sights. The amusement park was a thrilling and allowed for a romantic moment between you both on the Ferris wheel. The musicals showed a strange form of entertainment that had not quite made its way to Alola... You both even tried out the Battle Subway but found yourselves defeated the two odd fellows that ran it. There were even trips to Castelia, Virbank, Black City and anywhere else that a friend of Nanu's seemed to recommend. The trip became a nice change up. Undella and Humilau almost had you both feeing as if you were back home. Though, Nanu definitely preferred the comfort of your hotel to anything else. Relaxing in with you was nicer than any offerings of this region. Ultimately, Nanu is glad he took the trip and you both had a fun experience together.

♠️Grimsley❤️

♤ Marriage… Grimsley loathed the idea a bit. Perhaps it was the nature of his collapsing family that he grew up in that turned him away, or how badly it meshed with his lifestyle. He was not afraid to say that he slept around with little interest in proper relationships. Marriage seemed like a thing that would never intercept his path. Besides, that gamble of being in the fifty-seven percent of people that did not divorce… He felt his luck might run out there. Well, he had felt that way. Grimsley had been quite certain of that for a long while. But, he went broke. His thrill seeking behaviour had finally done something that he could not recover from easily. Then, you showed up. For once in his entire life, marriage had entered his mind as a desired thing. The scariest gamble of his life. Grimsley truly felt strange.

♡ Shauntal had come to him as he sat in deep thought within his Elite Four chamber. She had started laughing at how plain it was. Stop thinking of it as gambling… The advice led him to finding himself on one knee across from you in an isolated area of a casino. A brilliant ring was held out to you. “… Will you marry a guy like me?” he asked, feeling the hesitance eat at him. Your reply was to eagerly put on the ring and embrace him. A smug feeling filled the gaps left by his uncertainty.

◇ A wedding ceremony was fine to him, or you both could just go through the legal channels. Though, a ceremony will likely be held in a far too expensive venue within Black City. The other Elite Four members attend alongside Alder. A strange older man also shows up and seems bewildered to see Grimsley as a groom. The event has a classy, high air feeling to it somehow, yet there is some strange undertone. The ceremony is admittedly quick – The dark-type specialist was not one for lingering on traditions. The kiss between you both left you breathless. His piercing eyes gazed at you, much like his Liepard when she was ready to pounce. The reception consisted of multiple people amazed that he actually got married, and many congratulations. The older man scratched the back of his head and tried to figure out what had changed in Grimsley. You could not help but feel flustered when he said one word. Your name. The day quickly became one of his favourites. Marriage did not seem so awful now.

♧ Taking time off for a honeymoon felt next to impossible, and he struggled to think of where to go. Being married honestly had changed little in your lives but legal things, yet he felt strange when he thought about you being his spouse. The racing feeling in his chest could only be compared when he was a card away from twenty-one in blackjack. A getaway… But to where? Unova was already quite a tourist spot. He considered Alola but felt it too relaxed for his tastes. Caitlin had suggested Sinnoh, but he wondered what was there of intrigue. Shauntal recommended Kalos, and he felt more inclined. Marshal said that he should just keep focusing on his training. Grimsley opted for Kalos. It was a romantic region, after all.

♤ Lumiose was an exciting city that Grimsley could only think to compare to Castelia... Though, the metro in Kalos left much to be desired when compared to Unova's system. The city did have a romantic allure, and the gambler certainly enjoyed all the time spent with you inside the hotel room. The room was big enough to count as an apartment in some areas of Castelia. Yet, you both wandered the streets of the city, enjoying the many things offered. Food was delicious, and he certainly enjoyed the battle system in place. You could only watch as he got his thrills filled in there. The clothing was beautiful and much to his style. Though, you found yourself being gifted a nice outfit. At some point, you both had ventured out of the city and into Parfum Palace. Grimsley felt engaged by the beauty. Yet, even as he enjoyed everything with you, part of him craved the certain seediness found within areas of Unova. Ultimately, the trip really is a honeymoon with most of the time spent in your hotel room with Grimsely, but there are some vacation moments mixed in.

[sweetmage]

If you have a moment would you mind going thru how Wyll's character changed from early access to the current game? What was the feedback on him in early access/what caused the changes? I'm curious about it, I paid no attention to this game at all until I bought it a month or so ago on a whim, so I don't know much about the early access happenings.

Hi! Thanks for the question, I'd be happy to answer!

I actually still have my early access version of the game so I have been going through and recording scenes to upload to a playlist for people's comparisons. This is on hold for the moment because I've been very sick the past week or so, but when I return to it and begin uploads I can tag you if you'd like!

As for a brief summary of the differences. Wyll had quite a different origin story that was heavily tied to the goblins.

*Note: lease excuse me if I misremember something or if I leave out another big difference, it's been a bit! If anyone has a correction/addition I'll update this post.

The entire blighted village was a pretty big story location for him (killing goblins was kind of his thing) and it was the Goblin torturer Spike that took his eye.

He was also taking a more proactive role in tracking down Mizora, going to such lengths as even torturing a man (on Spike's orders) in exchange for information on her whereabouts.

Early Access Wyll seemed to have more of an internal struggle about his role as a hero. While he was still very charming, kind hearted, and an amazing friend he clearly possessed a darker side such as his burning rage for goblins, occasional arrogance, and the aforementioned torture scene.

He also used to have a romance scene at the tiefling party in which Mizora interrupts which seems to really distress him. From that + some datamined voice clips, it would seem that Mizora was a slightly more sinister figure prior to the rewrite.

As for the complaints, if you can believe it, they were basically the same. He's boring, he's useless, he's annoying, etc. I also used to see people singling him out as being untrustworthy and implying his kindness was wholly a facade (which I did not and do not agree with when it comes to Early Access Wyll).

In the full release he was made more objectively and clearly good, his story was more front loaded with big events to make him "more interesting", and a lot of the details of his story were changed. Yet still the exact same complaints exist.

Personally I like both Wylls. I think there is something interesting in both! I just don't think he should have been changed to appease people who clearly would complain about him no matter what, especially when it comes at the heavy price of him having a lot less content than anyone else.

Most of the things referenced can be found in this playlist I put together of other people's existing EA Wyll videos though its wholly incomplete + there are rarely variants of the scenes since he was unfortunately never documented well (why I want to go back and do it myself).

[sillybayo]

Promise Me?

(Originally posted on AO3 on 5/10/22. You can also read this on fanfiction.net)

A post canon marcanne fic with hurt/comfort, communication, and slight canon complaint. Contains The Beginning of The End and Kid Icarus Uprising spoilers. While watching Marcy play one of her favorite video games, it reoccurs to Anne just how badly she treated her in the past. Maybe they should talk it out a bit?

~~~

The sun was starting to set, and we were just now settling down from a long day of walking and playing around town. On the floor at the bottom of my bed, Marcy had a blanket tied around her neck in the form of a cape, playing on her 3DS. Sitting beside her, I was not watching the screen, but her look. How her expression changes from focused, to surprised, to confusion, to overwhelming joy. I would know what she was reacting to if I didn't tune out the noise from time to time. But, I soon noticed that a part of the game had ended, for the orchestral music was put to a stop, and Marcy's eyes were wide.

"Ohhh Anne, you'll never believe what happened!" She beamed while shaking my shoulder.

"What is it?"

"Pit can't fly anymore! He asked for the power of flight from Viridi, which he used up earlier from a battle, BUT Dark Pit was in danger and he needed to save him! And now that he overused his power he can't fly anymore and it looks like he's deaddd!" She leaned her head back on the edge of the bed and whined. But something must've caught her attention, as she peeped her left eye open and looked at me.

"Hm? What is it?"

She giggled and sat up straight. "You're looking at me like that again!"

Once again, Marcy was ahead of me for I hadn't noticed the smile and warmth across my own face until now. It's painfully obvious to her how much I like her, and I wouldn't be surprised if she knew all along. Not like I'm ashamed of it, anyways. I just wish I could've told her on my own.

"Sorry sorry, I couldn't help myself." I shyly replied. "You're just cute.."

"D'aww, stop it, Anna-Banana!" She teasingly flicked my forehead, my supposed punishment for staring. But she soon snuggled against me, adjusting the stylus in her hand and continuing her game.

Because of Marcy's quick summary of the last chapter, I found myself curious about what would happen next. So I shifted down to her height and watched her play. The game had an angel on the top screen, and characters talking on the bottom. The way she was controlling the game was different compared to others, and it seemed a little hard. But she seemed to do it with ease as if she prepared her whole life for this moment. I eventually found myself interested in the story itself….even though I barely have any clue of what's going on.

And before I knew it, the chapter was put to an end, and Marcy's eyes were sparkling. "He's alive!" She wrapped her arms around me and rejoiced. "He's aliveeee!"

"Shhh, my parents are probably asleep by now!"

"Oops—sorry, you're right!" She whispered. "I'm just so attached! The writer definitely knew what they were doing, because this is just so spectacular! The way the gameplay is implemented, the characters, the voice acting!" She squealed. "You have to play it for yourself!"

"Maybe I will.." I presupposed.

She let go of me and started to start the next chapter, and I began to watch..but I ended up zoning out again, and an old memory returned to my mind. When we had a sleepover, a bit similar to this one, and how Marcy showed us one of her favorite movies. And how we barely paid attention to a word she said. She had the same excited and passionate look on her face, but we didn't bat an eye. And we fell asleep, we always did.

"..You're spacing out again." Marcy waved in front of my face with a weak smile.

"Ah—sorry, just remembering something."

"Did I leave the oven on while making the cookies!?" She jolted up. I guess she was the one who forgot about things this time.

"Nono, I'm pretty sure you didn't, silly!" I booped her nose for a quick tease, followed by her laugh. "It's something else.."

Marcy slouched back down, closing her 3DS and looking back up to me, pouting. "You're frowning.."

"Oh, am I?" I paid attention to my face, and she's right, the smile wasn't there anymore. "Dang, you got me again! Don't worry about it though, I'm probably just tired. It's late anyways!" I stressed.

"You sure? We promised to talk about things that's bothering us from now on, remember?"

Damn! We did promise that. Once we came back from Amphibia and settled down, all three of us talked and thought of ways to make things better. And that was one of them. But wouldn't it upset her if I brought it up again? I wouldn't want that..I don't want to see her smile go away anymore. But the only way to make sure of that is to talk, isn't it?"

Taking a sharp breath, I sat up straight. "It's just..I can't believe this is what I've been missing out on all these years."

"Hm? What do you mean?"

"You know..all those times you were rambling and being all happy..I didn't hear any of it. Even when I tried, I ended up falling asleep or getting distracted."

"Oh." She blinked and clicked her tongue. "..Well, I know you wouldn't do that anymore! And that's all that matters!"

"But I still hurt you, didn't I?" I mumbled. She leaned in a bit closer to listen to me. "You deserved to be heard back then as much as you do now. I know everything's alright now but..I'm still very sorry, Marcy."

I didn't dare look back up at her, but I could feel her staring at me. She's not going to accept my apology, isn't she? I don't blame her..I wouldn't accept it if I were her either. But, I felt a hand on mine, and I averted my gaze back at her to be greeted with her dilated pupils and sweet smile.

"..It did hurt, it hurt me so much. Looking behind me just to see you two asleep made me very upset."

I blinked back a few tears and sniffled. I hurt her that much?!

"But! It isn't your fault. It never was. It wasn't Sasha's, and..honestly, it isn't mine either. It was just a mistake both of you made, and a common one at that. Plus, it's not like I should force you to listen."

"But we did it over and over again! And we kept leaving you out, and using you, and you didn't deserve any of it! We should've known how painful it was for you from the start!" I cried out. "I hate how I acted back then..I just want to go back in time and give you all the love you needed.."

Marcy tightened her grip and rubbed the back of my hand with her thumb, and I didn't understand any of it. Why should she be comforting me? She made her usual face when she's thinking long and hard about something, lightly scrunching up her nose, looking around the room, tapping her finger, and making little noises like "Bapapapapaaa..". She must not be used to talking about such things yet, which is understandable.

Finally, she made a pop with her mouth. "Well, you acknowledge that it hurts now, don't you?"

I nodded.

"And you promise to never leave me out again?"

I nodded again.

"You really promise?" She frowned and furrowed her eyebrows. "This is serious, you know. I don't want to go through that ever again. I'm glad you want to change and that you care about me, and although it isn't your fault, this is still something that should be worked on."

I flipped my hand so it would fit perfectly into hers, blinked back my tears once more and smiled at her. "I promise. Thank you, Mar-Mar."

"Nono, thank you." She consoled me. "If you never brought this up, we would've never fixed it."

I hummed in agreement and squeezed her soft hand. With her other, she gently wiped away my fresh tears that were starting to form, rubbing her thumb against my warm cheek in a soothing motion. After a while of drying away my damp face, it seemed she was lost in thought again.. Sure, she was looking at me, but I couldn't tell a single thought behind her dark brown eyes and she stayed silent and mostly still…maybe she's thinking about how pretty my eyes are and how she could stare into them for hours? Wait no Anne stop—don't think about that! This is serious!

"Mmm.." Marcy finally spoke. "Can you promise me one more thing tonight? Just to make it fair."

"Shoot."

"If you think you're about to go to sleep, can you at least let me know first?" She requested. "That way it won't hurt as much?"

"Oh, yeah sure! I don't mind that at all."

"Cool!" She beamed, and I couldn't help but smile at her relie— "WAIT nono one more thing," Well that was short lived. "Do I have to tell you when I'm about to ramble? I feel like I have to..if I had before then everything would've been alright.."

"No, you don't need to do that at all, I love hearing from you!"

Her face noticeably changed from a medium brown tone to a dark red and her eyes widened. "Well, if you say so.." Clasping her hands together, she looked away from me..maybe I should've kept that one to myself.

"...You can go back to playing your game now if you want." I advised, helping her hide her embarrassment..and hopefully mine.

"Y-yeah! I will! Thanks for the talk Anne!" And she swiftly scooped up her game, opened it up, and went back to playing as if barely anything happened. Scooting right back next to her though, I noticed the redness returning to her face, and she focused in front of her, as if she was trying not to look at something else.

"A-affectionate tonight, aren't we?"

"Hm? Do you want me to get off for now?"

"Nono! Don't get off! I'm just..not used to this.." She explained. "I-I mean I am! But tonight..it feels a lot different. It feels..more focused. Like, it's not something I could just think of once and turn away from anymore.."

And then my cheeks were a dark red. "Mm, I gotcha." I said, laying my head on her shoulder. "Just tell me if you want me to stop and slow down, alright?"

"I will." She said surely. "I'm glad we got to talk like this..it feels nice."

"I'm glad too, Marcy."

[ngmn2002]

Ch 109: Random thoughts (part 2)

Part 1 ...

Continuing with the court, the last case is...

Yugi Tsukasa.

The amount of cuteness! What a harmless kitty! Does he look like a criminal to you? He is so innocent! He is no criminal! Such innocent face hadn't and won't ever comment one single wrong thing in his life! ♪

...........

Look at him. Little mew mew. That's what I call the guy who is really truthful and says whatever he has in mind. A guy with no secrets as he puts it. ☆ you're keeping some huge facts to yourself still, am I wrong? Should we 'question' them to get an answer?

The 2's reaction though... it's so funny.

Wow. So now it's not only Tsukasa who made some kind of Akane expression but Hanako too.

Tsukasa's words about his assistant...

I wonder if Nene caught any meaning behind it? Her wish stands in sharp contrast with sakura's wish? For sakura's wish to come true, her own wish of living is no more? For her wish of staying alive, sakura's wish is no more?

Would she recall a thing of this sort?

And question her fast made 'wrong' conclusion of their 'talk'.

I will have hope she would. She won't forget it like she forgot Tsukasa is a yorishiro and didn't recall it or thought of the fact one day it will be his turn when he took her to destroy No.1's OR that moment Tsukasa said he needs the yorishiro destroyed for sakura's wish to come true. at least think of your own life span 'wish' Nene.

It feels kind of funny when I see something like 'Tsukasa goes all the way when he works on granting a wish'. That's true but... it's not like what he is doing there is only for her sake. He said a part of the truth but didn't voice it all. That's the catch. He has his 'own' motive out of doing what he has been doing so far.

Speaking a bit further into it, neither Hanako (now or ch 96) nor the keepers (Teru being a Minamoto for that matter, who knows lots of secrets behind the school) paid real attention to sakura being mentioned, unlike No. 6. I wonder if that means she is directly involved with appointing 'him' as a mystery only? Or if she has some kind of past interaction with him or him case in a way since she is aware of his story with Sumire and was the one in charge from behind the scenes of the No.6 yorishiro situation.

It feels the other mysteries don't hold any ties with her ruling over them or whatever or even know her? And having Tsukasa mentioning her, he must have known better than to do that if it will attract unnecessary attention for a one in her 'position'. Hmm....

This thing... uhhh... this boy... this boy... this boy... he gives me lots of work. ♡ 3-2-1... let's go...

Lovely

curious

little

kitty. ♡

Is he sitting on books btw? That's funny.

Have to say... Tsukasa's deal with the clock had me laughing a lot... it feels like he hates it... or even... it feels more like despise really. He wants the clock to be blown to smithereens. Wooh! Maybe since it gave both him and especially Amane a hard time.

Come to think of it, we can make the picture a bit wider...

We can start with a yorishiro destruction, leading to a brilliant boundary 'falling apart' wonder if he is curious to see what will happen once he is destroyed with Hanako's boundary

Moving to a destruction of a clock...

So while Amane was trying to fix the clock he was thinking: how would it look when it's destroyed into tiny pieces? Showing that almighty face? ♡ ........

-

Now I have to say some nice writing decision it was to have Tsu going to see the ruins of the clock. ♪

Look who's pleased with the outcome. Happy for you my dear. You got to see a thing you've been waiting to see for so long. And, got rid of a thing you despise. ~ Enjoy your victory. ☆ Hmm, is it safe to assume he went for kaku first to git rid of his ability of turning back time? He doesnt want things to be undone. Meaning, he wants things just the way they are now with the clock (or kaku's power of turning back time is annoying in general). I wonder what would come of the students and the people around the school then

Following that line of thought, I can understand Tsukasa in this issue but...

The thing I wonder about now with Tsu-clock relationship, is apparently his want to have Nene using it to time travel. Why did he tell her about the usage of the clock when he wanted it destoryed even since back then? What did he want to accomplish in there? Nothing was shown to be done on that regard. And... I think he really might not actually care much to use the clock to have Nene time travel, he has the nowhere space under his command and already used it to make Nene do so. So... the clock is not really needed! Expanding the image a little bit... the 'clock' keepers...

Perhaps he has a thing against them themselves. I wonder what they may have done to get him to feel that way...

???????

Seriously, Amane's whole deal with the clock (and maybe 'deal' with the keepers themselves?) is ....... I still can't get rid of what Tsu said to Nene about the future and past blending together in that festival. So... what if Amane got to actually 'do' something, resulting in what Tsukasa talked about, yet the keepers 'kaku' turned back time anyway and made whatever he did go to waste? Or maybe something across these lines... something serious happened back in time, right?

Hmm......

-

Then a school...

And,

The world itself.

What a force he is. ♡

It makes sense. He despises this unfair word and sees it not needed, so whatever factor to keep it up and support it is equally unworthy, unneeded.

A world that holds people back from doing what they want and to be who they are with its unfair rules is better off broken. Especially, when it's a matter of a person who means the world itself to him.

"It's said the annihilation of a civilization is as brilliant as fireworks"

In this case a world let's say. Hmm, who loves fireworks? I hope he'll be getting the fireworks he must be waiting to see. ~ if we were to assume the world will get 'destroyed' in the literal meaning creating such a 'view'.

Speaking of Tsukasa's wants to do/see things... this arc has some nice stuff included...

He fantasized about creating an artificial human ever since he was a child and got to see it as 12 y.o Tsu even before creating it, and granted created him in the future as yorishiro Tsukasa. Same goes for the clock, 12 y.o was interested to see it destroyed and granted got that as yorishiro Tsu. I wonder if back in the time he was still 12 y.o Tsukasa he also got to see/know the clock will be broken in the future some way or another like he came to see Mit 2.0 (let's take the glimpses of the future he told Nene about as a possibility). Maybe it was yorishiro Tsukasa instead who knew the clock will be destroyed in the near future...? This boy has some further knowledge into things so I like to keep that in mind. ☆

I do wonder if he has any other things he looks forward to in mind. Amaze me, Tsu. ~

Ahem, back to the 'court'...

So, the keepers made the judgment of having Tsukasa to be 'guilty'. For real? Only Tsukasa is guilty? What a funny court, what an idiotic court. Why aren't they so smart? Seriously, I was hoping to see the keepers much smarter than this! Like, just simply, the 4 guys in there, NONE of them actually made the action of breaking the clock, yet... the guy who did it is... apparently not guilty, nor the one who led Tsukasa and the guy to do it in the first place. What a joke of a court. So, the table turning on them at the end is a well-deserved result. Kinda funny, it felt as if the whole 'order in court' and the court itself... was never 'ruled' by them at all but actually 'him'. He left things go by assumingly as they want but he was just waiting for the moment to turn the table upside down. How sly of him. He is truly something, huh? No wonder he was having fun at the start of the chapter. What a force he is.~

Their suggestions feel to represent some stuff, actually... Akane.. 'feeding'. Just imagining how powerful these owls would get out of it. XD

Kaku... well...

WOW, Tsukasa! Do you plan to put Kaku to use somehow? lol wonder if kaku regretted his last words like no. 3

Cool to see this thing referenced once more in a way. I'm so weak to this sly smirk Tsuuu!!! The confident gaze!!! Uhh!!!

Wonder how was Amane feeling in there. I mean, sheesh. I wonder if he himself wanted to go wild on the keepers. Seriously? You don't know who you're saying you want to feed to the owls or turn into a gear or turn to dust. That's his moon and yorishiro mind you. How dare you say such things and intend to harm his precious prize possession.

My, cool Tsu is something to get me... she came to him by herself. Now, I think that's what I call one great mastermind, 'ruler' and the master of his 'games'. He played with them all and made them his puppets, that's so funny. He targeted their clock, yorishiro, then them from the start. ♪ He already had things figured out, everything was held in the balm of his hand. ☆

I mean, I have to say I've been wondering how will he take things after ch 108, but here we are.

Depending on Tsukasa's words after taking Kaku down, I have to say he proved his nimbleness, and being one intelligent strategist. ☆

It sees he had 'targeting the keepers' in mind for some time, and was waiting to take action, and little Mirai gave him the opening he needed. ☆

I wonder when that came to his mind, after singing with Nene, he wanted to go back to searching and was annoyed with Mirai's tickings. He got captured, then assumingly had to get 'free' with Nene's help and later Hanako's. Here I will stop, was he acting all along to be 'weak' by any chance?

Let's see... Mirai's 'seal' doesn't hold anything on him, it's either it doesn't affect him at all or it did, yet he can break free whenever he wants but 'decided' to look weak. So, he was acting or pretending to be vulnerable. Was he testing if Amane would come to save him by any chance? Was he going to actually save himself and Nene if that didn't happen? He let Hanako get captured just like that so his plan will succeed wizard Tsu vibes I'm telling you, what a mischievous lil bro. hehe oh... if he let Hanako get captured too so it would look like a small game of you didn't free me so I didn't help you. we're alike in the situation! pffft. what a fun soul

He can use Kokujoudai, and can master his OP strength. What a lie you told Nene Tsu. It can still be the truth, at that moment he was under the effect of the seal for real, but in the court he simply broke free. Anyway, some slyness lies in there. Even Nene is not supposed to know he is not actually 'weak'. How careful. He doesn't show anything to you, unpredictable. Always this way with his plans. The inside of his head. ~~~~ So Tsukasa, huh? ♡ ~

Now I know why. You amazing boy, you only give up limited access into what's inside of your head. No one gets you better than yourself. Me and myself.~~~

Cause you're not smart enough to catch up with his level of smartness. Try harder to understand him and how his mind works you self-proclaimed I read minds girl. ~ I will have to give him an extra point if what she said has a sense of truth and even with such powers, she can't read into him. Admirable. ☆

In the meanwhile, I'm siding with this guy! ♪

Let's keep working hard into getting to know him better! ☆

Going back to the chapter... I'm laughing Hanako really didn't need to set Tsukasa free. He can take care of it himself. Even without his sly move of making little Mirai move the time of his handcuffs forward. He will get what he wants, whenever he wants, however he wants. ♪

Hmm, he is admirable. Fascinating. Who doesn't love a mind like his, or a smile like his? Or even some strong gaze like his? We have a guy so capable and full of himself right there. Love his fast way of acting and dazzling confidence! Easy on me, Tsu! ♡ ♡ ♡ speaking of his physical speed again, I will have to remind myself he still had that thing around his ankle. and that by itself is...

Uhh, fangs... his sweet sweet fangs... sly smirk... boy!!! ♡ goodness, past + present Tsu will seriously have me spinning around myself. Hey! Don't look like you're working together to me! I can't survive one, how about 2?!

Thinking that Yako is a foxie... between her and Tsu... who is the real fox? ♪ it's funny thinking the fox took her down first, now.

Please… mercy on me… Tsukasa's sly laid back, carefree and relaxed capable confident persona!! Yes, we have such a calm and relaxed guy yet he is a force! ♡ ♡ ♡

The king on his throne! Carefully putting his masterplan puzzle pieces in place. Glorious. ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

Tap. Tap. Play with my heart. ♡

Straight forward, right to the goal at full force. ~

Where is my heart? I don't feel it anymore? It's in your hand you captivating enchanting guy? Okay! ♡ listening to Cascade's song dangerous while writing this. it randomly played and wow, have to say some parts of it are fitting for such glory. Give me a break, Tsu-force! Or don't! Uh, I can't decide because of you! ♡ ♡ ♡

Funny, Tsu showed me all the animals I associate him with in one chapter. first a cat, then a fox and later a powerful unmerciful tiger never to be underestimated or messed with. Wow. ☆

Hmm, he still kept his words of 'gentle with girls' huh? Even though she wasn't 'gentle' with him now or even back then, he didn't harm her really. Just had koku hold her. Wonder if that will keep up once he turns his focus to look for the yorishiro in her.

As for Kako, I dooo wonder if he previously intended to start with him, moving time back will be annoying. And, just maybe... a payment for embarrassing and making jokes of big bro earlier? Or again... is there a chance Tsukasa despised not only the clock but the keepers on a personal level in the past (and now)? Hmm...

Hanako's shout to Tsu to stop, I wonder if it was out of his fear for Tsu's well-being and safety or actually the other way around, he somehow saw what happened with No.3 coming and shouted at him to stop. He knows how powerful Tsu is, right? Looking at it either way is cool, one he sees Tsu powerful, the other he is concerned about the safety of his precious Tsu. ♪

Tsu being 'impossible to control'... I find that chaaaarming about him! He is free-willed! A force moving his own way, thinks his own way, sees things his own way, follows his own beliefs and works things out his way. Truely Fascinating. ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

However, I will have to say I used to believe if there is a person Tsukasa will listen to, it will be Amane. that's how the story made me think, chapter 108 too, and the magic AU kinda. 'wonder what's the inside of a ghost is like/wizard' Tsu -I saw him a lot in Tsu this chapter!- was a force no one stood a chance against until Amane called him and he acted like a good little boy I had it in me Amane can tame him… but… it seems it's to a certain degree, too. When Tsukasa wants a thing for real, he won't back down even if Amane told him to stop? Hmm… I find that charming, too. And it's still cute when he listens to Amane… uh… both ways are nice! ♡ ♡ ♡

You're WOW! ♡ What a lovely curious mind you have. ~

So, was the ticking Tsu heard coming out of little Mirai's clock only or also her 'inside' as well? Kako seems to have these 'tick tock', and back in their first arc, wherever Mirai goes there is also ticking. Do they also 'tick tock' with their clocks? Never expected the keepers to be this kind of creatures. Hmm... wonder if they work like robots and can get fixed? I see Tsu might have interest in there? Some experiments? They feel similar to artificial humans in a way? But maybe he won't be too interested?

The ending!

I wonder if Tsukasa is referring here to Akane or little Mirai? Akane was naturally standing near Tsu and it seems he is looking at Tsu but Tsu is looking ahead of him (not at Akane who is beside him), perhaps at captured Mirai? Hmm...

It's worth mentioning it looks like he went for the first clock keeper in charge aka kaku, then following this pattern, he'll go for the second keeper aka: Mirai. Then the third aka Akane.

I see she has a potential of having the yorishiro within her.

So, I wonder together with Tsu what's the inside of Mirai is like!

As for Akane... will he try stopping time? Instead of holding his clock he is holding the little hammer? Won't work on him, Akane. You saw that. Unless little hammer has other uses beside that seal or attacking? Does he intend to free Teru? He is the one who sealed him. I wonder if he can free Hanako too, since he wasn't the one to seal him, but rather Mirai.

Teru... to think a meeting between him and Tsukasa was so waited by the fandom... what was his reaction to seeing Tsukasa just going that way before his eyes? His definition of 'Evil spirit' shins in there. Mr. Teru??? How are things going by you? I think he may seem far more dangerous to you than Hanako you're chasing? Now, if Teru knew Tsu is Hanako's yorishrio... I assume that won't be good news for hanako, for many reasons...

I wonder if AidaIro intend to have something go on between the 2? Now or on later stages. They never paid much attention to each other this chapter, beside the time Tsukasa commented on Teru.

I do wonder how the next chapter will 'play' out, will they have a some kind of fight with Tsu? Hmm... maybe things will take a whole different turn for Akane and the rest, maybe Tsukasa as well. Anything can happen. ..........

Just having the possibility of 'the yorishiro might also not be within any of the 3' is funny. You might need to come up with a second back up plan Tsu. Will that be the case?

If things came to an end with the past and future keepers gone... and the yorishiro got destroyed... I wonder what would come of Akane's 'contract' with them. Will he be free? Return to be a normal human with no supernatural abilities? Will he feel happy to finally be free? I mean he showed he was tricked into working for No.1 and was furious about the fact. I wonder how he'll react, especially when things might come to his promise of healing Aoi's hand, as a normal person he really can do nothing I think? Hmm... his feelings might be contradictory somehow... ..........

My mind even decided to have the thought of 'what if we can repair the keepers'. Thinking about Mit 2.0, he can regenerate by eating weak supernatural representing the way he is made. The keepers seem to be like 'robots'? If their pieces were to be replaced or put back efficiently together somehow, would that bring them back in shape? or even, what if kaku was smart and careful enough to previously put a replacement in his place? I need to see the keepers being a threat. I want to see how much of a force they are. While I do want to see Tsukasa having his victory, it will be fun to see him overcomig a few hurdles.

Hmm... anyway! The conclusion we got out of the chapter simply is...!

At the end, the court was his to rule and master. ~~~

Hmm, well... after all he is the guy named...

Tsukasa.

What a lovely name fitting for him. A perfect match for a perfect guy. He makes me so proud of him. ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

I think we've reached the end of our talk about the chapaer on this note. Tsukasa, please! ♡

Thank you my dear! ♡ ♡ ♡

******

Adding this fun continuation as part 3 real quick!

Shhh, let's leave him to his card house building process! Think your plans calmly, Tsu! Good luck! See you later. ♡

.

.

.

Ok, here we officially reach the end of the messy chapter review. Too many thoughts to list...

Thanks for reading! Until next chapter!

[jerzwriter]

Choosing You

This is in response to this ask. How is Kaycee, a bonafide Swiftie, coping with the sad news? And how is Ethan coping with Kaycee?

Book: Open Heart Post Series

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x MC (Kaycee)

Rating: Teen

Words: 1,200

Category: Fluff

A/N: Participating in @aprilchallenge Music, Hug, Love

I did this really quickly without a lot of time to check it, be kind. lol

It almost hit sixty today. For April in Boston? A virtual heatwave! So it made perfect sense that the Esplanade was packed with people, Ethan Ramsey being one of them.

Unlike most others, he jogged there daily, regardless of weather conditions. Because of that,  he tended to be a bit territorial. But spring fever must have caught him, too. He had yet to utter a single curse, and he hadn’t once fantasized about frightening away the slowpokes who stepped in front of him. It was an unusual feeling, and only one thing would have made the day better… if Kaycee had joined him. But despite the beautiful weather, her mood didn’t seem as bright, so she chose to remain home.

 She was shuffling into the living room when she heard his key in the door. Ethan could tell that her mood hadn’t improved with just a glance. Her hair was tied back in a messy bun, and her ratty old NYU sweats adorned her body. He knew her “comfort food look” and, boy, if this was ever it.

She barely glanced up at him as he stepped into the room, her eyes only shifting when he tossed a small paper bag onto the coffee table before her.

“What’s this?”  she asked glumly.

But her fiance merely smirked and walked away, returning moments later with two spoons in hand.

“Cherry Garcia,” he replied, and the slightest of smiles began to show on the corners of her lips.

“Fro yo?”

“Nope,” he grinned. “Ice cream! The good stuff!”

He clanged his spoon against hers as if it were a toast, then ripped the lid off the pint. Both spoons dug into the frozen delight at once.

“Mmm,” Kaycee hummed as the chocolate and cherry flavors burst on her tongue. “This is just what the doctor ordered!”

“Well, I am a doctor,” Ethan deadpanned, “and I did order it, so….”

Finally, what his heart had hoped the ice cream would help accomplish... a smile.

“You’re such a cornball,” she snickered, plunging her spoon back into the container for another scoop. “How’d ya know what I need?” she asked with a full mouth.

“Wow! I almost understood that,” he smiled, bopping Kaycee on the nose with his spoon. “I’ve paid attention to you the past few years… I know when ice cream is required. And… I know when that ice cream needs to be Cherry Garcia.”

“It was go big or go home, I see?” Kaycee chuckled. “Good call.”

Ethan threw his arm around her shoulder, taking in the scent of her lavender shampoo as he pulled her in close. She was happy to be in his arms but even happier because she had the remaining ice cream in hers.

“So, when were you going to break it to me?” He asked as Kaycee looked up at him with questioning eyes. “Don’t give me that look. I already know.”

“How’d you find out?”

“It’s sort of all over the news,” Ethan replied, “Plus, I believe a group of young women on the Esplanade were holding a memorial service.”

“Shit!” She snapped. “I knew I should have gone along with you!”

“I take it you had a eulogy planned?”

“No,” she frowned. “I had a toast ready for the engagement party… not this.”

“Uhm, for their engagement party or ours, dear?”

“Ethan!” She shoved him gently. “It’s too early for jokes.”

“Fine,” he chuckled. “But seriously, why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I knew you’d think I was being ridiculous.”

“Slightly,” he agreed. “But you think I’m being ridiculous at least eighty percent of the time, and you still seem to love me?”

“It’s ninety.”

“What?”

“I think you’re being ridiculous about ninety percent of the time, but I love you one hundred percent.”

“That’s good to know… I think.”

“Ethan!” she whined. “I’m so sad! Taylor and Joe were the cutest couple. How do you go from an album like Midnights… to this!”

“I don’t know,” he scratched his head. “Although I think You’re on Your Own, Kid may have been an Easter Egg.”

Kaycee looked up at him with amusement. While she hadn’t decided if it was appropriate yet, given the solemn occasion, she allowed herself to burst into laughter.

“Ethan Jonah Ramsey! You know what an Easter Egg is?”

“Sure, you said you wanted to dye some later… it is Easter, after all.”

“You’re funny, but the song reference! You know, she wrote that one with Jack Antonoff. But it could still be a clue. I’m looking at things through different eyes now… was Midnight Rain telling us something? I don’t know, maybe it was, I just think....”

“Kaycee…” he interrupted.

“Yes?”

“You need to slow down. I gave you the one song reference I had…, and I overheard the term Easter Egg at the mourning service, and I wanted to impress you. But if it’s time for the deep dive into recent song lyrics… I think Sienna may be your go-to.”

“You’re right,” she nodded with a smile, “but you have no idea how much I appreciate your effort.”

Her face turned glum again, and her eyes fell toward the melting treat in her hands.

“It’s sad, though,” she whispered. “I hate seeing love end… how do we… no….”

Ethan caressed her cheek, lifting her chin to face him.

“What did you want to say?”

“How do we know that won’t happen to us? No one ever thinks it will happen to them. Most people in love… they think it will be forever, and the truth is, for most, it’s not.”

“Come here,” he whispered. He took the ice cream from Kaycee’s hands and placed it on the table, then pulled her onto his lap. “I don’t think we can choose who we fall in love with,” he smiled. “Sometimes pain in the ass interns just walk into our lives, and we can’t help but give them our hearts.”

“Don’t you hate it when that happens,” she teased.

“May I finish?”

“Of course.”

“I don’t think we can help who we fall in love with, but I believe we can choose to stay in love. Love, relationships… marriage… it’s like anything else. All I know is every morning when I wake up, I choose to be with you, and I will keep making that choice. I don’t think marriages are always easy; I’m sure there will be hard times ahead, but as long as we wake up every day and choose in our hearts to be together… I have no doubt we’ll be OK.”

Kayee ran her fingers through his hair, tears welling in her eyes.

“Ethan,” she muttered. “When did you become this sweet?”

“I think you had something to do with it,” he grinned.  “You and probably all of Taylor’s lyrics that are swimming around in my brain now, whether I like it or not.”

“You like it!” she giggled.

“I like anything that comes along with you.”

She placed a quick peck on his lips and then another.  The next few moments were spent silently reminding her just how loved she was.  Then, when the last kiss broke, he looked into her eyes.

“I love you…. but you need to analyze every song on her last album now, don’t you?”

Kaycee eyed the clock and nodded.  “I do. I absolutely do. Sienna is off shift in five minutes.”

“Invite her over,” Ethan said, gently nudging Casey off his lap.  “I’ll start dinner for the three of us.”

“You… you don’t mind?”

“Not at all.  I choose to be with you… this craziness and all.”

Permatags: @a-crepusculo @animesuck3r @annoyingmillenialnewbie @crazy-loca-blog @doriopenheart @differenttyphoonwerewolf @fayeswiftie @gryffindordaughterofathena @genevievemd @inlocusmads @jamespotterthefirst @jennieausten @kingliam2019 @liaromancewriter @lucy-268 @onikalover @openheartforeverinmyheart @potionsprefect @quixoticdreamer16 @rookiemartin @secretaryunpaid @socalwriterbee @sophxwithers @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction @jerzwriter-reblogs-asks @choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

More tags in reblog.

[chenziee]

News Coo

@lawluevents - Day 10: Pirate King Luffy AU/Confessions @onepiece-bingo: News Coo

Alternate summary: can't hide shit from Morgans...

HAPPY LAWLU DAY!!

I hope you enjoyed this series because I'm not done with it xD still have some bingo squares left 👀

[ Read on AO3 | series ]

—————

Stretching her arms over her head, Nami sighed in content. Peaceful days spent sunbathing in the Sunny’s garden were always the best.

“Caw!”

Nami paused, shielding her eyes carefully before she turned her eyes upwards, looking at the sky… just before a bundle of papers the News Coo dropped fell right on top of her head.

“Hey! I don’t pay your insanely expensive subscription to be treated like this! I’ll sue!” she threatened.

She only got another “caw!” in response. Somehow, it sounded to her like the stupid bird was laughing and she was so going to have a word with its employer.

Clicking her tongue in annoyance, she grabbed the tightly wrapped papers, trying to untie the cord in a way that didn’t tear the news inside. She really should go grab some scissors. Who the hell tied this thing?!

She barely managed to finish the thought when Robin’s hand grew right in front of her, bearing the very scissors she so needed. Huffing out a small laugh, Nami thanked the archeologist who didn’t even move from her chair or so much as put her book down the entire time Nami was struggling with this stupid News Coo delivery.

The moment Nami snipped the cord, the tightly rolled bundle unfurled and Nami winced at being greeted with her own face smiling seductively up at her from a brand new wanted poster. Why did it keep going up? She couldn’t even collect a single berry from that stupidly high bounty… At least the picture was cute, she supposed.

“The boys are gonna get so noisy again,” Nami groaned to no one in particular. Maybe she should hide these, at least for a little while. Just hold on to this peace a little longer…

Quickly sifting through the stack of wanted posters for both their and Torao’s crew, Nami barely paid attention to the numbers—even their previous ones were stupid high, what did a zero here or there matter anymore? She would never understand why the others always made such a big deal about it. Except maybe Chopper and Bepo, the poor boys deserved to finally get some recognition by now; even Nami felt bad for them.

But then, she reached the end of the bounties and instead, a special report came to view.

And Nami completely froze, staring at the headline with wide eyes. She read it over and over and over again, trying to wrap her head around it but failing.

STRAW HAT LUFFY—THE NEW PIRATE KING

It really said that.

It really fucking said that.

“How?!” Nami cried loudly before she could stop herself. “What the fuck kind of sources—?! We literally left the island two hours ago!”

“Oh my,” Robin said with a chuckle, undoubtedly peeking over Nami’s shoulder with an extra pair of eyes. “Morgans’ quick. He needs to introduce me to the souls of the dead who report to him. I could use them as well.”

“Not now, Robin,” Nami groaned. She had hoped to get in one shopping trip before the world blew up but no.

Not only did the world get turned on it’s fucking head four times over in the span of the past maybe two months—and then eight times more once Robin pieced the poneglyphs together—now she couldn’t even buy some nice clothes in peace.

And judging by the hands that appeared like omens or disaster on the railing right next to her…

She was not not going to even get to enjoy one quiet, sunny afternoon.

—————

“Torao! Look!!” Luffy called, bursting with excitement as he propelled himself away from the garden and back to where Law was taking a nap with Bepo. He felt a little bad about the way he crashed right into the two of them, but he was just so giddy!

“Fucking—What the hell, Straw Hat-ya?” Law snapped once he got his bearings.

“Sorry. But look!” Luffy repeated, shoving the special report he stole from Nami in Torao’s face.

Luffy watched expectantly while Torao read the headline, his eyebrows furrowing more and more with each passing second. Well… that wasn’t a reaction Luffy was expecting.

“Torao?” Luffy tried.

Law was silent for a second longer before he slowly opened his mouth to speak, his eyes not leaving the paper in Luffy’s hands. “How the fuck does Morgans know we’re soulmates and why the fuck does he think we’re getting married?”

“Huh?” Luffy blinked a few times, tilting his head to the side. What was Torao talking about?

As he looked at the paper in his hands, he finally noticed he was holding it out backwards—the front with the headline announcing him conquering the Grand Line was facing towards him… which meant he was currently showing Torao the backside.

The backside, which was apparently also the front side with another bombshell headline.

Slowly turning the paper in his hands, Luffy quickly skimmed the announcement on the other side.

STRAW HAT LUFFY TO MARRY HIS SOULMATE, TRAFALGAR LAW

As he read the words over, Luffy hummed thoughtfully. “Oh, is this because I was planning to ask you once we got to Sabaody?”

“Excuse me?!” Law asked, full of shock, but Luffy didn’t pay him any attention.

“Who cares about that, look at this!” Luffy made sure he was holding the paper right when he showed it to Torao again. He was grinning so wide his cheeks were starting to hurt.

“Did you seriously just casually blurt out you were going to propose to me only to follow that with ‘who cares’?” Law asked flatly, his eyebrows shooting up as he stared at Luffy over the paper—and not paying attention to what was written on it, goddamn it!

“Torao~!” Luffy whined and raised the paper higher. “Pay attention!”

With a resigned sigh, Law finally turned his attention to the most important thing—only for his reaction to be completely underwhelming.

“You needed a newspaper to tell you were the Pirate King now?” Law asked in a tone that sounded so very unimpressed.

“This makes it official! Torao, come on~” Luffy said, a large pout on his lips as he slumped forward, sprawling himself over Law’s lap where he was leaning back against the still sleeping Bepo in a half-sitting position.

At that… Torao finally laughed, the sound light and easy and sending vibrations through Luffy’s body. Ah, Luffy really could enjoy this little moment forever…

“Sorry, I’m joking,” Law huffed, his body still lightly shaking with amusement when he leaned down to press a small kiss to Luffy’s temple. “Congrats.”

“Why are you so mean, I hate you,” Luffy huffed—but his grin made it back on his face full force and he giggled happily. “Thanks!”

Luffy almost had to stop himself from purring when Law’s hand found its way to his hair, running through the strands carefully, fingers lightly scratching his scalp. How did Law do that? Was Luffy turning into a cat now?

Oh well.

Leaning into the touch, Luffy felt himself relax completely. This really was the best day ever—the ending of his dream was within sight, he had the best ship and crew to see it through with, and he had his Torao right next to him.

The only thing that was missing was some meat and—

“The answer is no, by the way.”

“What?” Luffy asked with confusion, turning his head to the side to gaze up at Torao.

“To your proposal. I’m not going to marry you,” Law explained, closing his eyes momentarily. “Who put that idea in your head anyway?”

“Sanji and Penguin,” Luffy replied without hesitation.

Law rolled his eyes. “Of course,” he said with a sigh. “Look, do you even want to get married? Do you realise you’d have to stand there for the ceremony while the cake was right there and you weren’t allowed to eat any of it?”

Luffy paused while the information processed in his head. Damn, he really didn’t think of that…

“Yeah, okay.” Luffy nodded to himself decisively. “Can we just skip to the party?”

At that, Law laughed again, shaking his head as he ruffled Luffy’s hair. “Yeah, sure. I’ll ask Black Leg to make a fancy cake and all.”

“Yay!” Luffy cried before a snicker forced its way past his lips. “As long as you’re happy, too!”

Law rolled his eyes. “I feel like we’ve had this conversation before but you’re literally my soulmate and I love you so what the hell would we need a wedding for? Not to mention the World Government is basically on fire right now, who even has the authority to do weddings as it is?” Law asked in a tone that suggested he wasn’t looking for an answer before he added, “Also it’s just way too much of a bitch so yeah, I’m happy as it is.”

“Okay! No bitch ceremonies,” Luffy said, his voice shaking with laughter at the way Law clicked his tongue at the teasing remark.

And when Luffy pulled Law down to his level, the both of them smiling into the soft kiss they shared… Luffy decided not to mention this was the first time Law told him “I love you” directly.

After all, Law showed his love to Luffy every day in the way he smiled, the way he always left enough room next to him when taking a nap with Bepo, the way he brought out his precious Sora, Warrior of the Sea comic collection from the Tang’s safe storage space so that Luffy could read them.

He showed Luffy he loved him in all the little things, all the little moments they shared—just as Luffy did for him.

And Torao was right; they didn’t need words, a wedding, or even their soulmarks to know it.

[eyeless-jeff666]

Love Hurts (Part 2)

Yandere!Jeanist again except I prefer he didn't hurt or kill people. So he didn't lol. The Erikas are an idea I got from one of the Black Butler musicals that absolutely wrenched me free of every tear I could have possibly shed. Thanks again anon for the ask! :)

The first part has an open ending which I also liked so this isn't necessarily the only possible one :) Angst, positive ending, Yandere

It’s been weeks since Shinya had been taken away by Tsunagu. He was still tied to the bed, his limbs so numb they didn’t even hurt anymore. The blonde had been treating him nothing but well, aside from the involuntary kisses, but even those were kept short and gentle. Shinya thought that if Tsunagu had admitted something sooner, they could have even been a couple. He wouldn’t have suspected anything.

“My little fiber, I brought you rice balls. Please eat something?”

He asked; for a good reason. Shinya hadn’t accepted food in two days and was starting to be really hungry. It wasn’t that Tsunagu had drugged it again since kidnapping the Ninja hero, but it felt so wrong to accept his favorite food now. The Denim Hero sat down by the bed, holding out one of them for the younger one to take a bite. Smiling widely as he did so:

“Oh, I’m so glad. I was beginning to think you were sick. Is it good? I made it as always. Do you want soy sauce?”

“No thank you, Tsu.”

Shinya replied, calmly, as if nothing was wrong. This had worked those past weeks; it was almost scary how normal Tsunagu acted; he wasn’t forceful, wasn’t pushing him at all, always spoke with the same kindness his voice had held since the two of them had met. He seemed content with Shinya just being there, living in his own delusion of being happily married. Shinya wasn’t scared at all which allowed him to think rationally; the other heroes should come soon, probably having a very clear plan ready. Knowing Jeanist’s patterns would give them at least an idea of where the two of them might have disappeared to.

“Tsunagu? Can I ask you something?”

He asked carefully, catching the taller one’s attention:

“Of course, anything.”

“Why didn’t you confess to me? Earlier, I mean. Why did you keep this to yourself?”

It was a question asked in genuine curiosity. Why had the man let himself fall so deep into this pit of obsession and heartache?

“Oh! Oh, that’s easy. You never paid attention to me, the way you did to others.”

Hearing this hurt, but Shinya knew he was right; he had always seen Tsunagu as a friend, and seeing him flirt with others, of any gender no less, must have hurt like hell. Shinya understood that.

“Were you scared to lose me? We could have talked about it. We’ve known each other for so long.”

“I couldn’t live if I lost you, my darling.”

The denim hero replied, his voice sounding full of genuine fear and pain. He stayed silent until Shinya finished eating, then stood up, looking towards the door; like he was waiting. Of course, he knew that somebody would be coming to take away his love. To steal the medicine to a pain he couldn’t handle any longer. Shinya noticed his gaze:

“Tsu. Tsunagu, look at me.”

It was surprising to hear that, but the blonde did; his eyes shining with a strange mix of emotions. The bit of light that was shining in through the pulled-down blinds looked pretty on Shinya’s face, but with each passing day, his tied-up body felt more and more out of place. Tsunagu was trying to push down that feeling but he couldn’t. He went over, laying down, and caressing Shinya’s face, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek, with a sadder expression.

“Are you happy seeing me like this? Unable to move? With no choice?”

Shinya asked, wondering just how deep this delusion Tsunagu had built up was; feeling like it had become more shallow. It was silent for a moment, time ticking by awfully slow, but there was no tension. Just silence and Shinya allowed himself to turn his head after a while:

“Tsu, please answer.”

“I can’t. I don’t want to.”

“Why is that? Because it becomes real when you do? I promise you, we can figure something out.”

The older one’s caresses became more firm, not in a mad way, it wasn’t angry at all, it was desperate. Scared, he was scared:

“I was so happy, having you with me, being able to kiss you. I was happy seeing you all the time but it feels.. wrong now. I want you... I want... I..”

“You are such a clever man, Tsu, you know you will be going to prison right? I can plead for you. If they believe me it’s not Stockholm. I can get you mental help.”

Shinya explained, giving a gentle smile for the first time in weeks, as Tsunagu only listened:

“Wouldn’t you like it if I visited you every day out of my own free will? If I came to see you because I care about you and not because you have me restrained? You haven’t hurt people. You haven’t killed anyone. Tsu, you are not beyond help. You just need to allow yourself to get it.”

“But I kidnapped you. I drugged you and stole you.”

Tsunagu said, and Shinya saw a single tear on the other’s cheek. The atmosphere was weirdly calming, and the gray-haired man continued talking:

“I forgive you for that. You need help, help I can’t give you and I know you’re not going to be happy like this long-term. I will make you a promise if you agree. I promise you will not lose me as a friend. I will not leave you. I will not let you serve more time than the court gives you. But I want you to promise in return to get help. There are good mental facilities, they are not all bad. I will support you.”

“But.. but you won’t love me.”

“Tsu, there are more kinds of love than romantic. I love you as a friend. I care about you so much. I want you to be okay, and I know you are not a bad person. You aren’t, you are a hero. I’ve known you for so long, and you are kind and nice, and talented. I admire you. But you have to prove to everyone that you can be good.”

Tsunagu was about to reply as the door flew open with a crash; seconds before people stormed in; Endeavor and Mirko first, followed by Hawks, all ready to fight and Tsunagu looked at his love with fear in his eyes.

“Don’t attack!!”

Shinya yelled, and the three froze, keeping out anyone still outside the door. One last kiss fell on his lips before Tsunagu got up from the bad, calmly and slowly how he had been taught to in a situation like that. He slowly raised his hands, closing them into fists to signify he wasn’t going to use his quirk on them.

The heroes all looked confused, even more so as Tsunagu began to cry more, with heartwrenching sobs, not resisting at all as Mirko pinned him down. Shinya asked her to be gentle, and Jeanist only moved his hands to free Shinya from the threads holding him trapped against the bed; it hurt to move his limbs after so long, but he could stand with Hawks’ help:

“I will keep my promise, I hope you know that Tsu. I want you to get better. I will just need to see when I can visit you. But I promise you I will come. It might hurt until then, and you might feel like I will not, but I promise you so much that I will.”

The days passed, it was a struggle for Shinya to rush through checkups, assuring the doctors and his colleagues he was fine. It was a struggle to get through psychological checkups and to convince people that his care for Tsunagu was genuine and not a result of trauma. It wasn’t Stockholm, because the feelings were the same as before; he wanted to be the blonde’s friend and wanted him to be happy. He couldn’t love him romantically, but he could platonically. And could and wanted to support him. It took a lot of convincing, especially to Endeavor and Mirko, to be allowed to go see Tsunagu again.

And when it was finally time, he brought a single Erika flower to the prison; Tsunagu looked terrible when Shinya saw him; thin, like he hadn’t eaten, and tired. His mind had probably gotten to him and he surely must have wondered if the younger one would really come.

“Hey. I finally made it. I’m sorry it took so long.”

He spoke gently, watching as the other perked up and came to the cell’s door:

“Shi.. I was-“

He started, but the younger one interrupted him; smiling and handing him the flower:

“I know. I had a hard time trying to be allowed to see you. I brought you a flower. Erikas signify friendship, I thought you might like it as a promise.”

“But flowers wilt..”

“I know they do. But our friendship won’t. Not if you get the help you need. If you promise to try your best to get better. And I make another promise; until your heart feels better, I will not start dating. Not Ryukyu and not anyone. I want you to be comfortable. And I don’t want you to feel like I do anything to hurt you on purpose. So I will wait.”

The blonde stared for a moment, then slowly nodded; he wanted to say Shinya didn’t have to do it but he appreciated it too much for that. His heart throbbed so badly already at the knowledge that the younger one would never reciprocate his romantic feelings.

“It hurts so much.”

“I know, Tsu. That’s why I hope that the facility you’ll be brought to will help. If you make an effort, they will shorten your sentence. I pleaded for that. I went through a psychological check-up, one that deemed me in the right state to make such a statement. It hurts me too to see you in pain like that. But I can’t soothe it by making myself unhappy by faking feelings that aren’t there. But a friendship isn’t worth less than a romance. I hope you know that. You won’t lose my attention. Not again.”

He said, taking the other’s hand through the bars; it was warm, and soft, and comfortable. For a moment they just stood there, calmly, and listening to the noises of other people talking:

“If you want to be a hero again, and regain everyone else’s trust, you will have to work really hard for that. I cannot promise it will be a success. I cannot promise you will be okay. I can only promise you that I will be there but only if you try.”

“What if I won’t be better?”

“I am optimistic. I know you. But if not then we will have to see from there. It’s normal that there won’t be instant improvements, and it’s normal for there to be declines from time to time. I want you to know that so you don’t lose hope. You will need that hope and you can’t give up.”

Shinya spoke, his voice still soft and calm. Tsunagu looked at him, being the one to let go of the short one’s hand:

“What if I tried only for you?”

“Then you still try. I’m sure you will be able to do it for yourself, once you start improving. I just want you to know you’re not alone at all. I know your mind will plague you enough.”

For the rest of the allowed visitation time, the two talked; not always about relevant things, some moments were spent entirely on memories, jokes and plans. Shinya promised to take him skating again. To have movie nights and dinners still. Tsunagu even agreed to try and speak with Ryukyu as well about everything. Once her anger died down.

Months flew by like minutes, and the mental facility Tsunagu stayed at permanently now, after his seven-month-long prison sentence, helped him greatly. Therapy was provided and he could speak freely about his feelings. His obsession and the unbearable pain. He was trying different medications, all safely observed by doctors, and Shinya visited him often. After around three months, other heroes had also started seeing him again. Especially scary was the moment of Gang Orca stomping towards him, causing him to flinch thinking he’d hit him only to be pulled into a tight hug.

“Tsunagu how much of an idiot are you?!”

He had said, but with the explanations and Tsunagu’s attempt at redemption, was more worried than angry. Shinya forgave him after all, so he was willing to do the same. It didn’t change what he did and that certainly wouldn’t be forgotten, but there was room for forgiveness nonetheless.

There was improvement, good improvement, only interrupted by days where Tsunagu felt like dying; pain overwhelming him along with despair of having surrendered without a fight. He was upset those days, angry with himself, and the only talking he did with people was when he asked the staff for some time alone. As alone as they let him be at that point. But overall, the worst thing about this facility was that he couldn’t wear his beloved denim fabric; trapped in ugly uncreative clothes he wanted to pimp with literally anything.

After over a year, he was allowed to return to his own apartment; still needing to serve mandatory therapy sessions, but overall free again. He did a lot of social work during this time, soon retaking leadership of his agency. Many of his sidekicks had left, while others stayed loyal to him albeit with cracked trust.

The pain was also a loyal companion, but now it wasn’t as bad. He wasn’t keeping it hidden to himself. Shinya wasn’t unaware of his feelings. Everyone knew now and everyone supported him when he needed time. It wasn’t jealousy now when Shinya was with Ryukyu, it was something else he couldn’t explain. But he got the other’s attention in equal amounts now, and the platonic aura, the different look Shinya gave him began to feel like something special rather than something bad. They were best friends. They could rely on each other. And fight together and even though he would never wake up to kiss Shinya, he could still wake up laughing with him after falling asleep on the couch during a movie.

But what was even stronger than the pain was the pure happiness of not losing Shinya’s light. He would be able to appreciate the friendship fully, one day, he knew that he could, if he just kept on putting effort into accepting the help that had been long overdue.

And that brought him a spark of peace he’d never felt.

[skyrim-forever]

A Master Wizard and His Feelings

Hey everyone, because of I've got Neloth brainrot (a subset of my normal Dunmer brainrot) I've written another piece about my oc Rochelle of Evermore and Master Neloth <3 Because who doesn't love two awkward bookworm mages trying to talk about their feelings.

Tagging: @thana-topsy come deal with the consequences of your actions (your Neloth art has given me life and already inspired two other fics <3)

Summary: Master Neloth has had trouble focusing, ever since him and Rochelle pretended to be married, he's been looking at her differently and is forced to concede that he may need to confess his feelings. Rochelle has some past stuff to open up to Neloth about as well.

Words: 3.5k

Warnings: Discussions of past trauma, discussions of grooming, discussions of unhealthy relationships, no flashbacks but could very well be triggering so feel free to skip! No hard feelings if you don't read :)

Deep inside the mushroom towers of Tel Mithryn, Master Neloth was having trouble concentrating. In order to get to the level of Neloth’s skill, one requires great focus and discipline in studying the Arcane; lately, however, he found himself distracted by the Breton woman who had become a permanent fixture of his life. 

Looking up from the tome he had been reading, or rather trying to read but needing to reread each paragraph multiple times to understand it, he eyes her. She’s hunched over all the floor by her bedroll, book open, deep in focus. Whatever he was reading is now long forgotten as he studies her face; she has the front pieces of her short white hair tied back out of her face, as she often did while working, her face scrunched intently reading whatever it was. I shall pick it up after to see what it is he thought. There was always the option of asking her what she was reading but then she would know he was looking at her, or at least paid attention to her long enough to know she was so entranced by something. 

And this was precisely Neloth’s problem, ever since their fake marriage ploy for her sister, he had found himself paying more attention to Rochelle. Much more than he paid to the other members of his house. He noticed how her tea went cold because she was busy reading or listening to him, how she began rubbing off on him; even being able to convince him to start doing stretches for his health. But most of all, he noticed how much he was aware of her absence when she went to Raven Rock on a supply run. He snapped himself out of it, fearing if he stared at her too long he’d never look away. 

Initially he reacted negatively to these feelings, he thought of kicking her out but he didn’t want to go back to how it was with just Talvas and the staff. Avoiding her was out of the question, considering she lived there. Everything boiled down to what he was most afraid of, he’d have to act on these feelings. Though he may be an expert on destruction magic, enchanting and a host of other topics, he was quite clueless on romantic emotions. Shutting the book promptly, he leaves to find Talvas the blasted boy is probably still outside struggling with that spell. 

“Talvas! Talvas” he shouts outside the tower, causing Talvas to fumble the spell he was in the middle of. 

“Master Neloth, I’m sorry I will get the handle of this spell soon I just need-”

“I’m not here to see the spell you fool.” Neloth lowers his voice to say the next part, looking around to make sure no one is within earshot. “I need your opinion on a serious matter.” Likewise Talvas also lowers his voice.

“What’s going on? Is there a plot against you? Should we raise the defenses?” 

“No, no, it’s nothing like that.” Rubbing his temples for a moment and taking a very deep breath, he says it “I have developed feelings, romantic feelings, for Rochelle and I am unsure how to proceed.” A smile beams from Talvas’s face and already Neloth is regretting coming to him for help. Beginning to feel embarrassed, he turns to walk away, muttering “this was a mistake I’ll just kick her out.”

“No no no wait Master Neloth, I, um, I’m not making fun of you. I’m happy for you, Rochelle would be the perfect match for you.” He tries to ignore the comment, but a small part of Neloth’s heart twinges when Talvas says that. 

“How do I proceed?”

“If I were you, I would try to spend some alone time with her, maybe outside of research. Spend some time together and let her know how you feel.” Talvas pauses for a moment, when an idea occurs to him. “She is heading to Raven Rock tomorrow right? I normally accompany her, perhaps you could go with her this time? As a way to spend some time together outside of here.”  Neloth had a puzzled look on his face.

“And leave you alone here? Absolutely not, we’d come back and the place would be in flames!”

“Master Neloth, do you truly think I would accidentally destroy Tel Mithryn?” Without hesitation he answers.

“Yes” Talvas goes to sigh but stops himself, fearing it would be yet another thing he would be chewed out for. Instead he thinks Geez, he really makes it difficult to help him and offers a solution instead. 

“Here I’ll agree to stay out all day that way nothing bad happens so you can spend some time with Rochelle. That work fine for you?” 

“Hmmm, very well. If you believe this is the best way to proceed.” Talvas offers him a smile to which Master Neloth just rolls his eyes. He’ll thank me someday.

It is at dinner later that night that Neloth tells Rochelle he will be joining her instead of Talvas. 

“Talvas has that stack of books to get through so he will not be able to accompany you tomorrow. Instead I will be.” Rochelle finishes the bite of ash yam she was chewing before answering. “That is fine by me. I was planning to spend the night at the Retching Netch, is that suitable or would you prefer to head back immediately after obtaining the supplies?”

“Staying overnight is fine, you know I don’t sleep. I shall bring some work with me.” Rochelle nods in agreement and they finish dinner. After their meal, Talvas stops Neloth, making sure he is out of reach of Rochelle. 

“I don’t suppose that ‘stack of books’ you mentioned was just a ruse?” Talvas smiles weakly at him. Neloth says nothing. “I’ll get right to it, Master Neloth.”

“Make sure you read them outside, as per our prior agreement.”

“Yes Master Neloth”

It is a rare clear morning, or at least as clear as it can get in Solstheim. Looking up at the sky Rochelle could almost make out the sun amidst the thick ash. Neloth was giving Talvas some last minute reminders. In the year and a half Rochelle had been there, she had never seen Neloth leave the grounds of Tel Mithryn. She was impressed he was leaving to accompany her, she intended to pick his brain on the journal she was reading yesterday. It was a journal she found long ago, although after her training with Neloth; she had new insights on what she originally thought were just the ravings of a madman. 

They bid Talvas farewell and started the journey to Raven Rock which would take them until midday to get to. The trip was thankfully uneventful. Ever since she cleared out Fort Frostmoth for Captain Veleth, the rate of ash spawn had gone down significantly. Her arrival in Solstheim was exclusively because she heard there was a Telvanni Wizard there and she was hoping to work in some part with him, primarily because she knew the Telvanni were more.. tolerant of taboo practices then the College of Winterhold, where she was at previously. However, she spent her first few months in Raven Rock proving her value to the citizens. Naturally, being as down on their luck as they were, the people were quite distrusting of outsiders. This led to a long series of events that involved her taking down an undead Imperial Commander, ousting a traitorous family and getting the Ebony Mine up and running again. 

Finally, after all that she was free to go to Tel Mithryn, where she had the pleasure of proving she was worthy of working with Master Neloth. I’ve been on this island for nearly two years, she thought. The climate was harsh, life was dangerous but she had spent her childhood with her Forsworn witch mother and later her noble father in High Rock; so Morrowind was merely a combination of the harsh life of the Reach and the complex politics of High Rock. 

On the journey Master Neloth explained to her the differences between most widely available staffs and Azra Nightwielder staffs, which apparently differed not just in their materials, but also craftsmanship. She liked listening to Neloth, she liked it a lot. Many had warned her about going to Tel Mithryn, saying the wizard there was crazy and reckless. But for Rochelle, she wanted that. She sought ancient and secret knowledge, where others saw recklessness, Rochelle saw genius. You do not uncover the secrets of the universe without going a bit mad, besides she was a bit mad herself. 

They arrived at Raven Rock a bit before midday, thanks to the lack of excitement on the journey. She tells Neloth the list of things to do in town. 

“There is a package of new kitchen utensils and I’ve got to stop by the Blacksmith to pick up some jewelry I ordered.”

“For enchanting?” Is all he says. She nods in return. They stop by the shipyard and obtain the package, the package is not large so it can fit in the satchel Rochelle brought. While walking throughout town, they received many confused glances. At first, Rochelle assumed it was her, but after realizing everyone staring at them were people she knew, such as Aphia Velothi. It was then that it dawned on her, they were staring at Neloth. It made sense, as far as she knew he had not been here since he arrived in Solstheim. That had to be decades ago.

Master Neloth noticed the stares too, it did not bother him, he couldn’t even remember the names of these people, as far as he was concerned they were in awe of him. As they should be, he was likely one of the few individuals in Tamriel who earned his sizable ego. He noticed that when they approached the Blacksmith, he shuddered and avoided looking at Neloth. Even better, he thought. It was better to be feared and respected than loved, or so he had thought. But when he saw the jewelry Rochelle bought, several plain silver rings, he felt compelled to buy her something nicer. She was a member of his house after all, she should be able to wear nice things. 

By the time they are done with their errands, plus the time Rochelle took to talk with the Second Councilor’s wife, it was already dark. 

“Sorry about that, I normally grab tea with Cindiri when I’m in town, I’m not a great conversationalist but she seems to find some comfort in my presence.” Neloth was hungry, he hadn’t eaten nor had so much as a tea since they left. He may be able to go without sleep but food was an entirely different matter. Yet he managed to silence his internal complaining enough, saying only “No matter.” 

Going down the stairs to the main area of the Retching Netch, Neloth is pleased to find they missed the dinner rush. Grabbing a table as far from anyone else as he can, Neloth sits as Rochelle goes up to the bar to order them food. Neloth spies the barkeep talking with Rochelle, talking to her much longer than it would take to simply order food. The barkeep says something that makes Rochelle chuckle, covering her mouth to hide her laughter. He’s not sure what he’s experiencing, it has been centuries since he felt anything like this. She comes to Raven Rock once a week and presumably she stays here each time. Surely he’s not… before he can finish that thought, she returns with two bowls of horker stew, placing one in front of Neloth. 

“Unfortunately the only thing left after the dinner rush is horker stew, I hope that is sufficient.” 

“It should be adequate, it is only for one night.” They begin eating their stew when the barkeep stops by their table, holding a tray with sujamma on it.

“Care to try my special sujamma blend?” Neloth goes to scoff, wondering what his angle is, until he sees Rochelle grab a jar, thanking him. Likewise he takes a jar, taking a swig. By the three, how did he manage to screw up something as fundamental as sujaama? 

Rochelle on the other hand, takes a swig and proclaims it is well-crafted. 

“It’s got a pleasant aftertaste, a slight snowberry taste.” 

“Ah you caught that, always perspective Rochelle. That’s why you’re the best at what you do.” A tint of redness appears on her face, clearly not used to praise. 

“That’s um, quite kind of you Geldis.” The barkeep, Geldis he supposes, takes his leave and Rochelle chugs the rest of her drink. Much to Neloth’s astonishment. He clears his throat. 

“You have managed to adapt well to Dunmer culture, not many outlanders fare well here.” 

“Thank you” she says “It’s nothing new for me.” He cocks an eyebrow at her, intrigued. He knew a bit of her past, she had left what passes as a College in Skyrim, to seek more serious instruction with him; and of course he had met her sister, an ordeal that was. But he realized at that moment that he did not know much about her past. 

“Explain” he states. She looks down, fiddling with her soup spoon. 

“I fear you may think less of me if I tell you.”

“I doubt that will be the case.” Rochelle pauses for a moment then elaborates. 

“I grew up in the Reach, in Southwestern Skyrim.” She looks back up at him. “When I was about 10 or so,  I moved to my father’s estate in High Rock. It was quite the culture shock but I was forced to quickly adapt to the customs of high society.”

“I did not know you were from the Reach, then why were you known as Rochelle of Evermore?”

She laughs a bit and Neloth realizes he likes the sound of her laugh. Normally trivial jokes and amusement annoy him to know end. Foolish drivel to entertain the common folk; but when the laughter is coming from her it is different. It’s different because he is the one causing it, albeit inadvertently. 

“Would you believe Rochelle is not my real name?” Face contorting slightly, he asks. 

“What is your real name then?”

She takes a moment to answer, clearly deciding if she should share this secret. 

“Mochveda, it’s an old family name. I was born Mochveda of the Reach, but my father changed mine and Colette’s names when we moved in with him. Partly to help us assimilate and partly to cover up the fact we were ‘his wild bastards’ from the Reach.” He’s not proud of it, but a part of him is shocked that someone from the Reach could possess such an affinity for magic, magic in humans was already rare let alone in someone from such a primitive place. Not that I should let her know that he thought. He may not be the best with feelings but even he could tell it would be ill-advised to let someone you had feelings know you thought they were from a primitive place. Remembering how she responded to Geldis’s praise, he decided to attempt it himself. 

“Not only are you a great mind but you are culturally savvy.” The redness appears on her face, deeper this time and she averts her gaze from him but smiles widely. 

“Thank you Neloth, you’re too kind.” No I am not, he thinks. 

They sit in a comfortable silence as they finish their meal, before Rochelle retires to her room. “You really should sleep occasionally” 

“And why is that?”

“Sleep promotes brain health, also, my mother taught me that dreams are keys to other worlds.” He just looks at her. “Say what you will about the Reach, there is ancient powerful magic there.”

“Perhaps one day I will get to meet your mother.” He attempts to humour her again but receives the opposite reaction, a mortified look on her face. 

“For your sake I hope not.” 

They bid each other good night and Neloth cracks open one of the books he brought. It takes him only a few moments before his mind starts to get distracted. His mind races with conflicting thoughts of knocking on her room door and confessing versus pushing his feelings down and repressing them. In a rare moment, in a day full of them, his heart wins and he finds himself knocking on her door before he can fully process what is happening. 

“Yes Master Neloth, I mean Neloth” Apologies for using his title after he told her it was fine to use first names when they were alone. She had changed out of her black robes into a red cotton dress. He had seen her in sleepwear before but it felt different this time. Perhaps it was the intimacy of being at her door or what he was about to say.  

“Rochelle, may I have come in? I have a private matter to discuss.” She nods and closes the door behind him and the confined space makes Neloth feel like he is going to suffocate. His gaze falters a bit, before settling on her, deciding it is most important to address her directly in order to increase odds of success. Clearing his throat first, he lets it out. 

“Since you have become a fixture in my life and at Tel Mithryn, I have developed feelings for you. Romantic feelings, specifically and I would like to pursue some form of companionship, if you are inclined.” The redness creeps back up to Rochelle’s face, which causes a wave of relief to wash over Neloth. 

“I would like that, I would very much like that.” She continues “but if we are going to have a relationship there is something you must know first.” He gives her space to keep going. “I’ve only had one prior relationship, and it deeply scarred me, so much that I haven’t considered romance an option up until several weeks ago, thanks to you.”

“Do you want to tell me about your last relationship?” 

“It was not right, and I understand that now, I should have told someone what was going on but I was too ashamed.”

“What were you ashamed of?” His voice has an unusual gentleness to it, a gentleness that causes Rochelle to choke up a bit. 

“He was my last mentor, my father hired him when it was clear I had progressed beyond self study. I thought he cared for me but once he got… what he was after he turned cold on me. Telling me I had seduced him, caught him in a moment of weakness and that no one would believe me. I really thought he cared for me.”

“Then he is a fool, simply not worthy of your attention.”

“I know that but he looked at me the way every woman wants to be looked at. Like I was the most breathtaking woman in the world. He nurtured my talent, praised me and called me beautiful; no one has ever called me beautiful before. Colette is the beautiful one,  I am the smart one. I prefer to be valued for my mind but there’s a part of me, a part which I loathe, that wants to be beautiful.” She sighs before continuing “I know it wasn’t right, what he did, I was far too young for that kind of relationship, and even so he was an authority figure, but it felt good to be wanted.”  There is a moment of pause between them, not an unpleasant one, until Rochelle spoke again “my apologies, you must think I’m a mess, so emotionally broken. But I say all this to let you know where I’m coming from when it comes to relationships and… I want to try something with you; but I need to know it will be different this time.” Tears begin to form in her eyes “I can’t go through that again.” Confessing was already more emotional than he was used to but Rochelle was being vulnerable with him; and he knew how difficult that was for people like them. 

“No need to apologize, going through such a relationship, to be used at a young age, will certainly leave a mark.” Neloth takes her hand in his and gives it a slight squeeze, “to ease your mind I will make my intentions clear. I want nothing more than to spend time with you, in any capacity.” Her eyes have found their way to the ground, so he takes his other hand and tilts her chin up. “And when I return to Vvardenfell I would like you to accompany me.”

“I would like that.” Finding the courage he moves in to kiss her, half-expecting  her to move away, but she doesn’t. A thought starts to form, something about how he should thank Talvas when they return. But when their lips connect, any thoughts either of them had disappears.

[gorteaus]

A Missing Encounter

Somewhere approaching the end of my Hunter x Hunter rewatch over a year ago, I couldn’t help but think, “I truly wish Youpi and Pitou had shared more meaningful interactions with one another.”

It wasn't sometime until later I realized, maybe that’s the point.

Since the invasion’s arrival kickstarts much of the events which lead to the guards’ development, the connections between them begin to take on a new perspective as well. Notably:

In the tower, Pitou and Pouf share a tense dichotomy with one another over the invasion.

Pouf only grows increasingly wary of the new changes he finds to have taken root within Pitou and Youpi alike.

Much later, Youpi and Pouf share a brief allyship in their endeavor to keep Komugi from Meruem.

From these relations, something stood out to me in particular:

Pitou and Youpi are the only two guards that never share any significant interaction during the latter half of the arc.

In fact, from the moment the invasion begins, the two never meet each other face to face at all.

Now, I’d like to preface with a brief disclaimer of sorts. 

My primary thesis focuses the idea that Pitou and Youpi’s notable lack of association over the course of the invasion might’ve tied back to the narrative in a much more deliberate way than I initially thought, but I should also note this post was originally part of a much larger analysis that has been split up for accessibility. While the other half to this is not a necessary read, the previous write-up of mine addresses aspects of Youpi’s character that provide greater context important for setting the foundation to the conclusion I’ve come to here.

Of one of these aspects is the way in which Youpi’s development over the first half of the invasion heavily leans into his newly discovered sympathy for humanity. A key scene I’ve chosen to highlight follows shortly after Pouf and Youpi reunite, and Youpi himself comes to an epiphany regarding what he’s been told.

It doesn’t skip my notice that even before Youpi has been asked to give a stance on Pitou’s dilemma, in response to the other's situation (and his defense of Komugi), we do get this:

A sincere understanding of Pitou’s behavior.

With this revelation in mind, I turn to chapter 295, because it’s illuminating in one of two things. 1) A shift in Pitou's goals:

And 2). How isolated he truly believes he is, especially in respect to the other guards.

Because 5 chapters after Youpi has come to his epiphany and 4 chapters before Youpi and Pouf reach the king, Pitou thinks this:

That Pitou came to the conclusion that the two other guards didn’t care for Komugi made perfect sense, and in my first few reads of this scene, I hadn’t paid much attention to the particular mention of Youpi here. But after a far more thorough read of chapter 290, I could do nothing but think about it, because it appears that this estimation hadn’t been made on any current knowledge of Youpi’s new developments, only past information. 

Consider that a face to face encounter and a single line of dialogue was all Pouf needed to evaluate the changes taken root within Youpi.

Pitou on the other hand, wouldn’t have been aware of any of the changes Youpi has undergone when he hasn’t been present for even so much as a direct encounter.

Whereas Pouf had met that change with suspicion and mistrust…

…Pitou’s reaction likely would be the opposite, as would it have been a situation he’d be able to utilize to full advantage.

Not only has Pitou been physically isolated from his allies for much of the present conflict, he genuinely considers himself to be alone in his care for Komugi, because the Pitou that believes as such both was present for and remembers when Youpi said this:

Pitou doesn’t need somebody who's ambivalent about Komugi, he needs someone who’d understand his desire to defend her (of which we’d seen prior in Youpi).

Because part of his struggle doesn't solely lie in healing and protecting her, it's also entrusting her to someone who could guard and safely deliver her to Meruem once he leaves with Gon.

We’ll never know what Pitou had been intending to say here before he’d been cut off by Gon, but given Komugi and the urgency surrounding his current situation, I’m willing to bank on the idea that his request had to do with her continued safety / ensuring she reached the king.

Inevitably, Komugi is taken hostage in the first place because there is no one else Pitou can entrust her to for her protection.

I also find the implications of Knuckle’s presence in chapter 295 equally intriguing here.

Knuckle, one of the key hunters present in the battle against Menthuthuyoupi, considers sharing key developments regarding the latter... 

...and stops before he can mention anything of true gravitas.

It is less so his reasons for doing so that catch my attention, as it is rather, what he knows that could have led to Gon’s hesitation and doubt. It’s the implications of what he’s about to say- everything that he’d been preparing to share- Youpi’s ability to change, his decision to spare the hunters, his newfound appreciation of humanity. Knuckle specifically mentions Youpi here only to pause once of the implications this new information could have on Gon’s mental state settle, but it’s also notable that this is news that would have been vital to Pitou even if it is information that would have, admittedly, reached him far too late to have been able to be acted upon. 

Knuckle’s internal dialogue leads us to consider only one party here, but I sincerely believe that he’s been framed besides not just one, but two people whom his information would have greatly affected. 

Everything about this scene and the weight of what’s been left unsaid is incredibly pointed to me.

[parallelroutes-old]

Dream + Haru? ((OOC: C-curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back? Tehe pero? JK 3 is a good number so---- ye. Don't hate me))

[ update: i am finally done fixing it now!! ]

“I’m afraid of bugs," she had said.

He knows he's been considered a bug plenty of times by plenty of people before, just something that should be squashed and thrown away. That view of him was never important when he knew he was not a bug, and no one else's opinion mattered to him in the slightest.

"Afraid of being useless," she had also said.

Although he doesn't have any desire to consider her in terms of 'useful' vs. 'useless', the Byakuran of the past could have tried to kidnap her to use against Tsunayoshi-kun. He didn't. If he wanted to hold anyone hostage, it would've been Kyoko-chan, the darling of Vongola Tenth. Haru-chan never seemed important enough and didn't have the the same ties to them, so he never paid attention.

"And terrified of being forgotten."

There were alternate versions of Haru-chan, of course. Some of them stood up to him directly, and he hasn't really forgotten that. He didn't think much of it when his ultimate goal was the only thing he really thought about. It was interesting, but he had priorities at the time. He doesn't have priorities anymore.

But he knows her better now. He's paid attention this time. Haru-chan is one of the most vibrant people he's ever seen and he doesn't think he'd ever forget. Popular, pretty, entertaining, deeper than expected, kinder than anyone he—

"There's a lot I'm afraid of, but that's normal for everyone," she had told him.

She was right there watching when he'd nearly crushed Tsunayoshi-kun to death and pierced his heart with Shiroryuu's arrow form. She was there to see him lose his mind as both his wings and his life's only ambition were torn off. And yet, when they met here, she was just nervous and apprehensive. She was not afraid of him.

"Even you, I'm sure."

Does he have anything to be afraid of? If so, what?

He's been thinking about it while twirling that arrow in his hand. There are a few things, but he wouldn't consider them fears when they're already happening. They don't qualify as answers to the question.

He flicks his wrist, the arrow flying just like a dart toward a motionless figure in front of him and it will fall to its knees once pierced through the heart. He never sees its face and he prefers to keep it that way when he already knows what it represents. This dream ends the same way every time he sees it.

However, something off to the side moves. Before he can even blink, another figure jumps in front of the first just before the arrow's impact, and it's this figure that falls to its knees. The initial figure is frozen in place and doesn't make a sound as the first falls forward onto the ground.

It's not important, Byakuran tells himself, because this is just a dream. He can just force his mind in a different direction. Lucid dreaming can be very useful, as this is one of them he can usually avoid.

However, a scream so loud distracts him the moment he tries to pull up a different one. It's so loud he thinks he'll wake up, but he doesn't. He can't. All he can do is watch the figure as it—

The arrow still sticks out of its heart, but it's not dead. It's not even injured. It curls its hands into fists as its face and expression forms. It's not afraid, but it's not angry either… he doesn't know what that emotion is.

As soon as he sees tears rolling past its cheeks, he realizes what it is. Betrayal.

He already knows the sharp pain through his own chest isn't real. He's felt it plenty of times before, always shooting through his back and narrowly missing his lungs. It feels different this time, though, and he thinks he knows why—

It's been shot into his own heart.

A wet feeling drips onto his arm as he clutches his chest, but when he looks down, there's nothing at all. No blood. There's no sign of any other normal bodily fluids, and none of that would feel anything like this does.

He would never be able to switch dreams like this, even after he closes his eyes and curls up. It feels so strong that it's impossible to even think beyond how much it hurts. It doesn't matter that this now qualifies as a night terror. He still feels like—

Like—

Like…

…….

It's hard to tell what length of time passes between the pain taking over his subconsciousness and the moment he notices he can think again. Maybe it's been a long time, maybe not. It doesn't matter. What does matter is that the pain isn't overwhelming anymore. Right now, it's more like torture.

The warmth surrounding him now hurts even more that he's clinging so tight that the arrow presses into him as well. He doesn't want to let go. Even if he could, he wouldn't.

"… but that doesn’t mean the anxiety and the fears from then don’t exist. Be any less valid."

Every tear dripping past his eyelashes burns. Biting his lip doesn't distract him from the sensation, but that's normal when something this hot is pressed against human skin for too long.

"The person I was supposed to be and who I will be are different people."

It's humiliating hearing himself make such a pathetic snivel, but it's better than letting anything else drip off his face. He's already been scalded enough.

"Do you see yourself as the Byakuran we saw back then," she starts in a lively tone, as if nothing is wrong, "or do you understand you’re different from him?"

"I’m a totally different person, but… " He's trying not to sob, but it doesn't matter as his own voice doesn't come from his own lips. All he can do is quiver and hold on as tight as he can.

Still, if he remembers right, she agrees. "You are whatever Byakuran-san you are today, and he was whoever he was."

Even though he knows that, the sheer magnitude of all the horrific and terrible things the past Byakuran weighs down the Byakuran of today. It weighs heavy on everyone who was there for it, not just him, and it will never be any lighter. Crying like this is not something the past Byakuran would do, so what does that make him now, then… ?

It means he's…

He's…

……

— The pillow is soaked and his cheeks are wet when he wakes up. It takes him a moment to blink his eyes open, then reaches up to rub the remaining moisture onto his fingers. Nothing burns anymore. He curls one blanket around his shoulders and thinks… this doesn't feel so bad. It even feels… alright.

If he still feels the need to hear Haru-chan's voice, he'll just call her when it's not four in the morning. They can chat over the phone about something normal, something not related to those dreams. Nothing indicating he'd cried his eyes out, both in and out of sleep. Tears have no relevance to anything, unless he wants to use them as a 'secret ingredient' someday.

… Actually, that's disgusting, so maybe not.

Anyway—

[fate-magical-girls]

As ambitious as her brother is, he will never match her ambition. After all, he grew up knowing he has a possibility of inheriting the crown, while she grew up knowing she could not depend on the normal order of inheritance. A chaser of a possible dream and a chaser of an impossible dream; how great of an ambition is needed to make the impossible possible?

She should leave the treaty negotiations to the ambassadors, but she makes the journey in person, with her King along as an accessory. Perhaps she just wants look upon a reminder of her past. Perhaps she wants to to compare her past with what she has now.

Her brother has the same idea. They meet in a manor on a lake island in a neutral territory -- King and Queen, of same blood but opposing nations.

The Queen clutches her husband's hand extra tightly as remorse flashes across her face. She regains her composure quickly, but silently chides herself for this show of weakness, especially as her brother shows no such trepidation.

"Royal Brother, and my dear sister," he greets her and her husband with all due gentility, "It gladdens my heart to meet you under these auspicious circumstances, where the friendship between our nations shall hopefully be restored."

"Dear Royal Brother," she greets him, likewise with rehearsed lines, "I too am overjoyed at seeing you safe and sound. Our bonds of friendship were never broken."

Her husband murmurs his own greeting. With that, all formalities are done, and they proceed to talking business over breakfast.

As the victor, the Queen is the first to make demands. She wants reparations for the unprovoked invasion, the annexation of certain seized lands, and free access to a major port. Her brother listens, and then makes his counter-offer: reparations will be paid provided certain noble hostages are freed, access can be given to the port with reduced tariffs, but as for the lands...

"High-minded, virtuous queen, I beg you recall the love that our mother and father showed us and the happy days we spent in our native lands, and allow your natural affection to guide the terms you shall set out for us."

"Perhaps it is because of my natural affection for my native land, that I now long to associate myself with part of it." She replies, mildly annoyed by his moralizing tone.

The conversation goes on. With every offer and counter-offer, her brother brings up their blood relation. She realizes that he has observed her moment of vulnerability and is seeking to capitalize on it.

It is an appeal aimed as much at her as it is toward all observers and scribes. He means to have the world at large judge her for any demands she makes of her natal nation. Even if their familial ties had been technically severed when, during her wedding, she drank down the sacramental wine mingled with the blood of men from her groom's family, adopting her into her new family.

He knows, as well as she does, that simple ceremonies do not erase the truth of one's origins...

Fine. She'll lull him into a false sense of security then. Let him think he's found a way to soften her heart, and then turn the tables on him. She just has to find an opening, a momentary lapse in words...

And her king creates the perfect opportunity.

"You're the one who attacked us!" He snaps, as his brother-in-law makes another cloying plea. Immediately afterwards he shrinks back, looking toward his wife to see if she disapproves of his outburst.

She pets his hand without matching his gaze, all her attention on her brother.

"My Lord speaks the truth. Our ties of blood provide me with a natural affection toward you and my natal home, but they must also inspire affection within you. So what has so displeasured my royal brother that you would rather continue to set flesh against blood, than to show generosity to me?"

Now she is the one using their undeniable familial link against him.

"You sue for peace, and I shall give it, for I am generous. Yet I also ask for you to grant me what is mine by right."

Her brother tenses, the first crack in his calm and charming facade. The queen smiles, knowing she has cornered him.

"After all, as we are siblings bound by blood, does it matter if it be you or I who holds these castles?"

She doesn't get to keep every territory that she demands -- she must show her consideration toward her brother, after all -- but she does gain land for her kingdom

I think the funniest dynamic for arranged-marriage royalty would be a queen who came here 100% prepared to murder her future husband and rule as a widow queen in her own right, only to discover that the king is autistic as hell and responds to her wish to rule with "oh thank god please do, I don't want to be bothered by these people. I can just tell them to go bother you instead, if you really want that. I've got beetles I wanted to study."

[todoscript]

how he would ask you out

request: pls some headcanons of how the boys (shinsou/tamaki/shouto) would ask the girl they like out 🥺

characters: shinsou hitoshi, amajiki tamaki, todoroki shouto

genre: fluff

word count: 3.3k+ total, 900-1200 per character

tags: pining, confessions, fem!reader

author’s notes: sorry if this sounds rushed?? i can’t write 

copyright 2021 todoscript, all rights reserved. i do not allow my creations to be published or translated anywhere else.

SHINSOU HITOSHI

two years after his enrollment into the hero course, shinsou had finally came to terms with the feelings he’s been holding for you for quite some time now.

what began as just friendly encounters and kind gestures felt like something more to him. after all, you were one of the key people that led him to transition smoothly into the class, with your helpful demeanor and coming to his aid whenever he was stressed and troubled by the new environment.

you went out of your way to organize study sessions and small arrangements to mingle and get to know the other students better.

you reiterated to him that if he ever had any questions about anything, he could always come to you.

initially, shinsou thought he was being a burden—that he was just heavy baggage that tied you down.

however, you assured he was anything but, and stated that you were more than happy to help him, even going to say you enjoyed spending time and getting to learn more about him.

at your response, shinsou was appalled at how genuine you were.

appalled… but also very grateful.

eventually, there came a point when he realized there was no mistaking the affection he felt for you—not when he subconsciously noted every one of your habits and intricacies, able to tell whatever emotions were running through you at a simple glance, or when he would stop to admire the way you decided to style your hair differently or changed your look, thinking you seemed even more charming that day by the confidence you exude.

no, at that point, he’s sure it was painfully obvious. so obvious, in fact, that kaminari and mina had chosen to skip today’s group study session in favor of letting the two of you have your “alone time”. whatever that could mean.

shinsou had grimaced over their excuse of “being too busy that day” when you had told him the reasoning they gave you over text, despite knowing their next exam was only a couple days away. recalling just how nosy and enthusiastic they could get when involved in these kinds of affairs, he had an inkling of what exactly those two were planning. you, on the other hand, seemed completely oblivious to their schemes.

however, what did latch onto your mind was the thought of spending the day with only shinsou, in his very room, sitting across from each other with your textbooks open in front of you. though you should be more attentive to your studies, you couldn’t help the palpitations beating loudly in your chest and your wandering eyes that snuck glances at him after every question you answered.

unbeknownst to you, shinsou mirrored your actions all the same, reciprocating the flustered behavior, albeit a bit more subtly.

keep calm, hitoshi. why are you getting all worked up? he would say to himself, putting on his usual facade.

although he came off as relatively calm and collected on the outside, it’s difficult to keep his emotions in check when actions never lie.

that was especially true as he reached his hand out for the eraser you two were sharing between each other. with his eyes continuing to gander down at his notes, he hadn’t noticed that you were lunging for the same thing—not until your fingers had suddenly touched and you both pulled away at a speed equivalent to making contact with fire.

his stare unfaltering, shinsou was surprised to discern the embarrassed look on your face that immediately fixed itself as you rummaged through your pencil pouch. a second later, you pulled out another eraser, one that was notably smaller than the one you were sharing.

“um.. i’ll just use this,” you offered, and shinsou rubbed the back of his neck, the whole situation more awkward than it needed to be considering you never had any trouble sharing your supplies with each other before.

through some examination of your demeanor, shinsou had made a… bold enough claim, thinking that maybe—just maybe—you held the same kind of affections for him as he did for you.

it’s like he recalled earlier—actions never lie—and shinsou didn’t let the quiver of your lips or the intense concentration at your work to avoid meeting his gaze go past his head. that’s what spurred him to finally act on his desires.

without warning, he leaned forward on his seat to lay his hand over yours that caught your attention. you met his eyes, astonished to say the least, but more so concerned by how your eyes widened before you were about to open your mouth to ask him what was wrong.

the violet-haired male beats you to your words, voice resonating firmly, “y/n.”

you blinked. “y-yeah..?”

“i know this might be a bit late coming from me, but,” you could feel his hand tighten atop yours, “after exams, do you want to catch a movie together? just the two of us?”

shinsou fought the urge to look away, bashful at how he made his declaration for your time. the warmth surging under his skin was alleviated at the smile that slowly curled on your lips as you rotate your wrist, your palm touching his. the expression washing over your features told him you’ve been waiting for him to ask you this for a while now.

“i’d love to.”

AMAJIKI TAMAKI

ever a shy and introverted individual, tamaki has never had the heart to ask you out despite years of harboring a crush on you.

every time the thought had crossed his mind, he’d reason poorly with himself that you wouldn’t be interested in him in that way.

it didn’t help that his low self-esteem only deepened that thought that had now rooted itself in his brain.

at such a prestigious school like u.a., you were bound to find someone far more compelling than him—someone with guts, confidence, and great social skills. not a guy like him who conjures the image of potatoes at every anxiety-inducing encounter he comes across.

he was relieved enough to settle himself comfortably as just your friend—a title that allowed him to stay close and keep within your circle, all the while subjecting him to simply admiring you from afar.

but his eyes that held a hidden longing for more weren’t overlooked by a fellow student of his. or to be precise, the ever curious and free-spirited, hadou nejire.

always aware of his surroundings, it was hard not to notice that peculiar stare she’d aim at him during moments where he might’ve just finished speaking to you, or when you’d pass by and his head would naturally drift in your direction.

it was like she was picking apart every detail laid on him and it made tamaki absolutely restless.

tamaki’s suspicions and anxiety were later raised during one instance at the lunch table. he was at his usual seat next to his other big three companions, mirio and the aforementioned nejire, who was eyeing him with a gleam in her eye.

even with his self-consciousness, tamaki did his best not to pay any mind to the undesired attention and munched on his plate of takoyaki—the octopus nestled in the batter sure to come in handy later in training that day.

to his dismay, you passed by their table with your tray of food in hand, and nejire did not waste any time calling you over in that cheery tone of hers.

she invited you to sit down with them. you gave her invitation some thought before ultimately placing yourself in the free spot next to mirio, with nejire and tamaki already seated across from you.

the girl was all smiles and hums while tamaki was in a state of distress, both at his friend’s odd behavior, which was starting to spell trouble, to having you pulled into all of this. mirio was just being mirio, welcoming as always.

you greeted everyone at the table, making eye contact with mirio and nejire, but tamaki evaded your line of sight. he simply waved his reply without breaking away from his balls of takoyaki.

luckily for him, you didn’t give his lack of words much thought and started digging into your own lunch. it was then that nejire found it appropriate to start up a conversation.

“y’know, y/n, i’ve been meaning to ask you this, from one girl to another,” she mused, finger waving around playfully, “are you interested in anyone here?”

upon hearing her question, tamaki almost choked on his bonito flakes, his cheeks puffed and eyes blown. meanwhile, your chewing slowed as you gave your answer some thought.

“uh… well–”

“i’d say fujita from class d is quite the looker! think you’d be interested in them?”

after swallowing the food in his mouth, tamaki began to subconsciously listen in on the conversation. he paid close attention to your responses with bated breath, a small part of him anticipating your answer highly.

“fujita’s nice and all, but i don’t think we’d really get along as a couple.”

tamaki mentally sighed, relief evident all over his face. it was then that mirio had started fitting the pieces together after watching his close friend’s brow wrinkle throughout the entire exchange before finally relaxing at your words. crossing his eyes with nejire’s only confirmed his suspicions as the girl sent him a wink.

as a friend, mirio wasn’t about to let nejire’s operations fall flat. getting up from his seat, he motioned tamaki to come with him.

“i heard they have extra yakisoba bread right now! we should go check it out!” he said as a guise to give the other two time to themselves, free from tamaki’s prying ears.

unaware that mirio had caught on so quickly, tamaki didn’t object to tagging along with him. mostly because he thought of this as an opportunity to get some fresh air and calm his racing heart, finally feeling the effects of the blood rushing to his face.

with tamaki supposedly out of earshot, nejire was free to go about her questions however she wanted.

“okay then, if not fujita, then who? there has to be someone, right?” the girl scooted further in her seat out of pure curiosity. “tell me, is it perhaps someone in our class?”

it was your turn to be stricken by her boldness. you tried picking at your food, stuffing it into your mouth to avoid answering, but nejire’s tenacity outmatched you.

finishing your lunch, you opened your mouth to speak, “actually, the person i’m interested in is pretty close to you…”

nejire feigned ignorance, innocently placing a finger under her chin. “who? mirio?”

“ah no, it’s tamaki, alright?!” you ended up blurting, voice hushed but frantic.

bingo. hearing exactly what she wanted, nejire returned to her original position, a triumphant grin plastered on her lips. replaying what you said out loud in your head, you buried your warm face in your hands.

unbeknownst to you, tamaki had ended up hearing the whole exchange around the corner coming back to their table as mirio lightly snickered at his revelation of an expression.

the blond patted his shoulder. “go on then, you know what to do.” he threw tamaki an encouraging thumbs-up.

the boy gulped in response before inhaling a deep breath of air to prepare himself for what would arguably be the most important yet stress-inducing moment of his life so far.

noticing you getting up to discard your tray, tamaki—through a final push from mirio—went to make his move.

hearing him suddenly call out to you, you were caught off-guard. after admitting to your crush on tamaki to nejire, you felt your cheeks get hot just seeing his face right afterward.

“oh hey, did you get your hands on those yakisoba breads?” you scraped up a way to start the conversation.

“right... that… mirio managed to get the last one in the cafeteria,” he answered. then he brought his hand to rub his elbow, fidgeting in his spot as he found it difficult to look you in the eyes again.

“tamaki? something wrong? are you upset that he got the last yakisoba bread?”

he shook his head. “no, i… it’s just… i’ve been meaning to ask you this for a long time now, but never had the courage to say it to you because i didn’t think you ever liked me that way. but…” he finally mustered the determination to face you head-on. “would you go out with me, y/n?”

at first, you were speechless—absent of words as you relayed his request in your mind over and over again. then, your eyes softened, lips easing into a smile as you reached out for his hand.

“i thought you’d never ask.”

TODOROKI SHOUTO

it’s no surprise to many that when it came to asking someone out, todoroki didn’t exactly know the first thing to do.

mostly because he’s never asked anyone out to begin with.

you were the first person he’s ever felt these kinds of emotions for, and to be frank, he wasn’t sure what to make of everything that had been going through him when that root of infatuation had started to bloom inside him.

rather than sulk or contemplate on his thoughts for too long, he surmised it was best to simply come clean and ask for advice.

but when he confessed to what had been on his mind lately, he wasn’t expecting such a vigorous response from his friends.

“i’ve been thinking about asking y/n out.”

there was a layer of uncomfortable silence amongst the group before all hell eventually broke loose.

midoriya, uraraka, and iida immediately sprung from their seats in the common room, yelling “what?!” in unison. tsuyu and her frog-like mannerisms were more idle, but still surprised nonetheless.

todoroki was unfazed by their reactions, actually expecting it to go that way considering he’s never brought up any topics of that nature before. at the very least, he’s thankful he decided to say this when it was just the five of them. compared to what the whole class’s reaction would have been like, this was incredibly tame.

todoroki was used to always listening to what others had to say and never being the subject of the conversation when it came to dating.

but now things were different. he was openly admitting to them that he was regarding someone romantically. that he possibly sought a relationship with this someone—wanting to be committed to them and become the very best person he could be right next to them. to the four, this was coming completely out of left field.

after everyone simmered down and let the news sink in, the dual-haired boy resumed his thought,

“but i’m not sure how to do it.”

though the entirety of the group never had any experiences when it came to dating, they knew enough from media and pop culture to get an idea on how to help him. more than todoroki could imagine on his own anyway.

“i know! how about we go with the romantic and suave approach!” uraraka suggested. the rest asked her to elaborate.

“it’s simple! it starts by you leaving a note on her desk right before class, saying to meet you on the rooftop of the school! before the designated time, you should wait there for her with a bouquet of flowers, and then when she arrives, confess your feelings and ask her out!”

midoriya rubbed a finger against his cheek, skeptical. “i don’t think that sounds as simple as you’re making it out to be.”

tsuyu chimed in beside him. “those kinds of ideas usually only work well in books, ochako.”

pursing her lips, uraraka gave her plan a once-over, and realized it did seem a bit more involved and out of character than what todoroki was used to.

despite sharing a few more ideas with one another, they couldn’t narrow it down to any perfect one.

that was when iida clapped his hand, bringing everyone’s attention to him.

“alright, i think we’re starting to blow this whole ‘operation’ way out of proportion,” he said.

“if you’re honest about the way you feel about her and show it sincerely, i’m sure she’ll consider your feelings. you don’t have to do anything extravagant when it comes to asking someone out.”

listening throughout every word, todoroki nodded. meanwhile the other three were astonished that their class representative could be so whimsical when it came to romance, which in turn, iida was conflicted by. however, at the very least he was glad they could help out a friend. and so, todoroki went about his day with their discussion in mind.

he found that in many occurrences, whenever he crossed by you and thought of it as a chance to ask you out, there would always be someone to come in and take your time away. leaving him to stand there awkwardly before dismissing the fated question for later.

eventually, the sky dimmed and evening arrived, and by then, the whole class was already back at their dormitory and about to have dinner.

through some rather convenient circumstances, you two were actually assigned on kitchen duty that night.

“it’s been getting pretty cold lately so i was thinking we should cook up a hot pot for everyone.” you gave your idea to him as you pulled out some ingredients from the fridge, waiting for his reply, but it came a few seconds later than you were expecting.

“right. sounds like a good idea,” todoroki answered a tad late. upon realizing it was only going to be the two of you making dinner tonight, his mind was occupied by what he and his friends spoke about earlier.

that was when he started overthinking the situation and absentmindedly half-assed his work.

“todoroki, the cut on the tofu is slightly uneven.” you reviewed his cutting board. looking down, he saw the inconsistent slices of tofu limp in front of him. if bakugou were the executive chef for the evening, he would’ve had to hear an earful from him.

“sorry…” he apologized quietly, reaching out for another cube of tofu to cut.

“is everything okay? i know you’re still learning how to cook, but i’ve seen you show some significant improvement on your knife skills recently.” you voiced your concern for him.

the white and red-haired boy stared at the white bean curd while hearing your worried tone and couldn’t find it within himself to continue the task. it was now or never he thought. he laid the knife flat on the cutting board.

“actually, i wanted to ask you something.” he turned toward you. “do you… want to go out with me?”

nothing but the sound of the fire running on the stove could be heard in the kitchen. todoroki didn’t move his eyes away from you, watching you nearly drop the plate of siu choy and shiitake mushrooms out of shock as your mouth was hanging open.

when you caught onto your bearings, you let out a small laugh. “oh… i… wasn’t expecting that,” you admitted honestly, placing the ingredients on the counter safely.

the boy furrowed his brows. “is that a no?”

“n-no! i mean that isn’t my answer! i–” you fumbled with your words, cheeks warming up now that his confession had finally sunk in. in the meantime, todoroki found your reaction quite amusing. the corner of his lip quirked into a grin.

“what i mean to say is that yes, i’d love to go out with you.” you accepted the offer wholeheartedly. todoroki would be lying if his heart wasn’t throbbing from anticipation. he’s glad he’s able to rest and put that aside.

“now let’s continue making this hot pot together!” you cheered, smiling widely and he found comfort in your words before resuming slicing the tofu.

[zekrommoo7]

Why I think the Electro Seelie represents Tomo and the implications it holds for Kazuha

Hey guys, Zek here. This is not an incorrect quote or anything of the sort so sorry if that’s what you follow me for ;;

I was doing the next part of the golden archipelago that came out today and on the third Kazuha domain there was something that really caught my attention. And that thing was the electro seelie that guides you through a good chunk of the domain. 

Now, I believe that this seelie is there to represent Kazuha’s dead friend and here’s why. (I just finished the domain as I write this so here’s to hoping it’s still fresh enough in my memory)

under the cut for length, also it’s not proofread

All three domains knit together tell the story of Kazuha. It starts with his childhood. Even though his clan was struggling, everything still seemed so grand to him. He didn’t think anything was wrong. It’s fully of memories and little messages from his family. There’s no enemies here aside from those found in the dojo. Memories of sparring matches that would have been controlled by his father or whoever was supervising him. Note, those are the only things to manifest here (aside from chests and puzzle things but I chalk that up to normal genshin domain stuff).

The next domain really picks the decline of Kazuha’s household once he’s old enough to notice it. His dad tries to convince him that he shouldn’t be tied down with a failing clan and that he should go do what he wants. Kazuha doesn’t want to leave his dad to take the burden and for a moment he feels like maybe this was happening because he wasn’t good enough. That’s a pretty memorable situation and something he apologizes for once we find him. The thing is, that shouldn’t be something he apologizes for. It was an incredibly tough situation that he had no control over it. Usually apologies don’t come unless you feel like it’s your fault or if you feel ashamed. I think he’s ashamed of his past self. And for someone who claimed to have completely moved on and left the past behind, he did seem to know exactly what part of his life we were seeing, despite only having a second-hand account of what happened. 

Finally, this brings us to the third domain. 

This domain takes place after the fall of Kazuha’s clan. He’s paid off all the debts his family owed, let go of all the staff, and sold everything that wasn’t a valuable family heirloom. He didn’t have anything to his name anymore. After we here him dismissing the last butler and any other staff that may be around his home, it’s expected that now he’d be completely alone, right?

Well soon enough we hear the voice of his friend (who I will be calling Tomo for convenience). Kazuha is talking about his life, the two are talking about visions, he’s not alone. 

Soon after in the memories, the Tenryou Commission comes to Kazuha’s home it seems like to take his vision. Tomo tells him to come with him and then we’re met with a door. The door needs two seals to open and on the island there is only one. 

The second one can be found by following an electro seelie that shows up after Tomo calls for Kazuha to follow him. And what do we do the whole time? We follow the seelie. It guides us through puzzles, helps us unlock chests, and accompanies us through battles. It guides us to the duel with the Raiden Shogun and even beyond that. 

But how can it be Tomo if Tomo died fighting the Raiden Shogun? Well, I don’t think the seelie is him exactly. This world is based on Kazuha’s memories and his mental state. I think more than directly being him in his memories, the seelie is meant to represent him. 

While being there for most of the domain, the seelie does not see us through to the end. It stops just before the boat that takes Kazuha out of Inazuma. Kazuha has told us multiple times throughout this that the past is history. He has moved one, he has left it all behind. The fact that this seelie has it’s court at this point in Kazuha’s life shows that he’s trying to leave Inazuma behind. All of it, everything. Even willing to leave behind his friend, whose memory he has been carrying with him all this time. 

And I mean, Tomo had an electro vision. It was an electro seelie. Easy connection right there. 

Now, this would line up with what Kazuha says pretty well. If it weren’t for the fact that Tomo manifested as a seelie so clearly in the first place and played such a vital role of getting us through the domain. 

Think of the things I’ve mentioned that have manifested so far. Distinct little memories from his childhood, the kind someone could easily recall but nothing that really pieces together into a coherent story. Controlled sparring matches that would be vital to remembering the different sword skills he’s learned. His fight with his dad, probably the first one he has, accompanied with feelings of inadequacy. Losing everything. 

Throughout all three domains, there has not been a single person to manifest aside from the people Kazuha has had to fight in his life. The shadow of his dad does not count. It’s merely that, a shadow. It doesn’t interact with us like the seelie does. 

This is something-- someone that he feels so strongly about that they manifested in a way that could interact with the player. Why was Tomo manifested so clearly when Kazuha insists so strongly that he left everything behind?

Well to put it simply, he’s not being honest. Whether or not he knows he’s lying doesn’t matter. What matter is the fact that he is. Deep down he has not moved on. He says at the end of the quest that his heart is clear and he says another word I can’t remember off the top of my head. He says that with that second thing, it also means his heart is empty.

His heart is empty when he has so many people that support him. He’s not letting people in because he still has not fully overcome Tomo’s death. Tomo was the one constant in his life after he lost everything and surely Kazuha opened his heart to him. Then he died. Sure he died fighting for what he believed in, but Kazuha at that moment was truly all alone. By that point he could have felt like he truly lost everything. Maybe those feelings of inadequacy even came back from when his house was falling. 

So while he has all these people around him in the present, he still feels alone. 

I think when he says he left everything in the past, Kazuha really means that he’s locked away those traumatic things. I think until he learns to really face his past and really move on, he will be unable to to open his heart to anyone. 

[duckkeepswriting]

Bedtime Stories

@flufftober 2022: Day 20 Words: 540

A/N: This is very loosely tied with my upcoming Ensemble Stars story. Please look out for it in the future! In the meantime, I hope you all enjoy this little snippet!

In the warm afternoon light, Ritsu could rest easy knowing that their- no, his- Producer would be right here, by his side.

The nocturnal knight hated being awoken from his slumber, especially when he can still feel the heat of the spring sun through the leaves of the tree he had taken refuge under for the day. But the soft humming and gentle caresses to his head that he had gotten so used to over these past few months had suddenly stopped, and he could only groan irritably at the loss.

"Sorry," a soft voice reached his ears before slightly calloused fingers resumed to tenderly play with his dark locks. "Narukami-senpai just texted me. She's still looking for Sena-senpai."

Ritsu made a non-committal hum under his breath as he made himself more comfortable in his place on her lap. He paid no mind to her embarrassed squeak when he unabashedly wrapped his arms around her middle, using her as both a makeshift teddy bear and pillow.

"R-Ritsu-senpai!" she stuttered, and the boy didn't need to look up to know that a sprinkle of red dust was slowly creeping up the girl's cheeks. "We have to h-help out at the garden terrace today. We should head out s-soon, shouldn't we?"

"Five more minutes," Ritsu replied groggily as the girl tried and failed to coax him to at least sit up. "Hey..."

Deep ruby gems looked up to meet those tinted a bright light blue. And for a moment, Ritsu could feel the air from his lungs escape as he watched the late spring breeze play with the soft white bangs of her hair. He doesn't know when he'd last felt this way, or if he had ever, but the vampiric boy could feel himself get lost in those soft pools of blue. Ah, this is bad. He'd forgotten what to say and he could vaguely register her asking him if he was ready to leave...

"Tell me..." Ritsu whispered, and he could feel something blooming in his chest at the way she looked at him with all of her undivided attention. Her low ponytail draped over her left shoulder, the faint remnants of a blush scattered along her cheeks, and a serene smile tugging on her soft lips-

"How did Tsukipi keep sneaking you in here to watch our lives last year?" That wasn't what he initially wanted to say, but the way red quickly replaced pink had him chuckling under his breath as he watched the girl try to stutter out a coherent response.

"W-We agreed not to talk about that!"

"Spoil me," Ritsu replied as he closed his eyes. "If you tell me, we can go to the garden terrace to meet up with the others."

Ritsu knew it was only an excuse to stay here longer. In fact, he was pretty sure she knew it too. Still, she indulged him. Her quiet voice carried by the wind as she shyly told the escapades she and their leader used to get into. The lethargic knight continued to relax in her hold- her fingers hadn't stopped playing with his hair at all, could she blame him if it made him sleepy?- breath evening out, until little by little he knew no more. There was only the warmth he could feel starting to blossom in his chest as he went back to rest.