#The thing that made me mad was resolved and the result is actually incredibly good for me

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Bruh I have GOT to figure out a better way to manage my anger, it's so rare when it gets the better of me but when it does my health frickin tanks so fast 💀

[another-day]

hey gang, guess what time it is, for the last time in season 3....

EPISODE IN REVIEW - THE SEASON THREE FINALE!!!!

spoilers for episode 19 of inanimate insanity invitational!!!!!!!!!!!

oh. my. gosh.

this was such a beautiful episode, most things felt resolved and it was just SO GOOD

if you didn't see my previous posts, i was up at 2am to watch this episode due to timezones, and it was so so worth it. let's begin!!!!!

oh the character development is amazing, this versus how lost he was at the beginning of season two is just so interesting and amazing to see. i'm so so proud.

full honesty, i have a lot of trouble emotion-wise, and hearing this kinda caught me off guard because, as much as i'd like to ignore it, springy's never been anything more than a villain to me.

it helped me realise that, yeah, springy is another character like everyone else, and they have feelings, and they have capacity for goodness. it really got me thinking, especially since this line really had me relating to them. but ah well, onwards!!!!

seeing cabby get pissed was really funny, but also she's turning the broken insult walkie talkie presented to mephone in the last episode. it was very very cool, a reclamation of power really.

can you tell i like cabby

also this was such a pivotal moment for her, and as someone who apologises for literally anything people deem wrong, this was incredibly inspirational and soooo cool to see.

the poor guy, he's been nothing but berated this whole episode

the way i literally almost screamed at two in the morning i was shivering and shaking throughout the entire episode and this was like my sould left my body HE'S BACK and oohhhhohohohoo GUYS GUYS GUYS

this was such a beautiful scene; a robot who sacrificed himself for a happy ending for so many others encouraging another robot whom was the living result of his sacrifice to embrace the life he has. THEY DRIVE ME MAD DO YOU SEE?????????

NAME DROP!!!! also i think this is the first time he's acknowledged cobs in reference to his own actions, he's coming to terms with his memories and experiences, and realising he can learn from them GOODNESS do you see what i am saying BOTH THIS AND MEPHONE 4S's SPEECH ARE ENCOURAGING HIM TO LOOK PAST HIS MISTAKES, AND NOT DWELL ON THE PAST

does this mean mephone's finally gonna treat toilet like an actual person, WHO FREAKING KNOWS!!!!! but i really hope he does i really do

guuuuyyyyss stop i'm going to cryyyyy LOOK AT THEIR LITTLE MESSED UP MARRIAGE PLEASEEEEE

i had to squeal so quietly when i saw this BUT YAAAAY MY LOVELY LITTLE CABBY WON!!!!!!! i was so happy she absolutely deserved this and its so symbolic that test tube's vote ended up being the deciding factor and AGH i'm so happy!!!!!

SHE'S SO CUTE SHE'S LITERALLY THE BEST I LOVE HER DEARLY

they're so silly and so supportive of one another, and the fact that even with balloon considering himself a more self assured person and more independent, nickel's still willing to stick by his side to cheer him up!!!

guys them look at them

"Or of..." HER OR OF HER FREAKING OUT GUYS this guy's so silly and i'm so glad they're getting along again <3333

marriage

their sweet little family i love them dearly

communication is key !! this was very cute and i'm so glad they're getting along again

THE TEETH DETAIL they're literally spoiling me dude

GUYS THEY MADE YURI REAL i love them so so so so much

because of course she'd put her prize towards a knowledge bank for everyone, cabby's such a gem you guys i love her so much

i'm so glad they're getting along now, they're such a silly pair!!!

i literally almost cried when i saw this, mephone 4's reconstructing all these things that made him feel like he was useless to push himself forward, and its so beautiful to see, i'm probably gonna print this out and put it on my wall because its so meaningful and just UGH

the heroic pose, the self assured smile, ready for anything

this was a beautiful way to cap off the season because there he goes !! its so exciting!!!!

he's gonna need it girl lets hope the season 2 finalists didn't go insane

WAAAAAAAAAAH they used the the track "don't leave me until i find my way back to you" and the way i almost sobbed my little heart out that was such a beautiful homage and track and GOODNESS!!!!!!

overall this was a great episode. though i feel some dynamics, such as mephone 4 with 4s, and silver spoon with candle weren;t explored nearly as much as i would've liked, they crew really did an amazing job on this episode.

thank you so much for all your hard work inanimate insanity crew, and i'm so excited to see the rest of season two and how it'll play out!!!

till then, i'll see you next time ooooonnn episode in review!!!!

(bada bada duuuuum!!!)

[fereldanwench]

okay so

i guess i'm doing this

i've avoided talking too publicly about any of this because it's... messy and uncomfortable for me, and probably other people, too. i also don't want to perpetuate drama and i was hoping i could just move on, but i don't think i can without unburdening myself a little here and i need to be witnessed, lmao.

i think this fandom also has a culture of whispering and gossiping in discord servers and dms rather than addressing anything head-on, and breaking that norm is also uncomfortable.

but the thing is, even if no one explicitly shares anything, that energy still obviously influences more public spaces and how we interact with each other. it breeds a lot of paranoia and mistrust, i think, even for people who aren't predisposed to dealing with issues like social anxiety or RSD. but given how many of us do actually deal with those things, it makes it even worse.

(although on the flipside, i think there are also plenty of conflicts that should be resolved privately and sometimes going full salted-earth publicly is also the wrong move, but I DIGRESS)

and look, yes, i am bad in this regard, too. i got sucked into this shit with everyone else, and i fuckin' hate it. i hate how much inconsequential knowledge i have rotting inside my already very overloaded brain about who's besties and who blocked whomst and WHATEVER THE FUCK I DO NOT FUCKING CARE

i didn't get involved in this shit in high school, i certainly don't need to be getting involved in it now

having said all that, here's some internal fandom conflict i've been dealing with on and off since january of this year.

about a week after lizzie's shutdown, i did notice that people i thought i was cool with were seemingly no longer cool with me. it was also happened not too long after i made the how-to fandom guide that i realized missed the mark for some folks, so i was like, well, maybe it was just that.

but to be completely honest, even if it was just that, that still kinda sucked too. although i agreed with the feedback that i should have taken a different approach to some areas in that guide and been more sympathetic to other sensitivities for creators in the fandom, my heart was in the right place. intent doesn't override impact, of course, but intent should still count for something, i think.

and i'm not asking for sympathy, i don't want or need it, but i do just want to share where i was mentally at the time to set the stage for later anxieties: no one likes getting yelled at for doing what they thought was a good thing.

but yanno, also, again to be fully transparent, i did feel like some folks were projecting their insecurities onto some sections and were just taking an uncharitable read on it as a result. i think a handful of people just didn't read it at all and wanted to revel in some righteous indignation, an impulse i unfortunately also understand too well so i can't judge too harshly there. sometimes you just see a phrase that just gets under your skin and nothing else said before or after that matters. i know. I've been there. but it is still kind of unfair to the person on the receiving end.

but i tried to walk away from that situation with humility and understanding and as a lesson to be more thoughtful in the future. i also had enough people say that it was helpful for me to feel like ultimately was a net positive, and i felt like everyone was moving past it.

so a few weeks later, after lizzie's had shut down under INCREDIBLY ABRUPT AND CONFUSING CIRCUMSTANCES TO ME, and i noticed i was being seemingly shunned or even blocked by folks i was like...

are people mad at me again for the how-to-fandom post?

or, because i am publicly friends with some prominent members of lizzies who have been accused of bullying and other bad things, that i am guilty by association?

at the time, i actually considered making some sort of public statement, but i took a step back, and i told myself "no, you're just still dealing with some lingering anxieties about The Fandom Post and you're extra sensitive and inclined to some paranoia right now. you were mostly active in the 3 months in lizzie's before it shut down. you don't have a strong association with the server. that's silly. and making a post like that will probably just make things worse because people will assume a guilty conscience is an admission of wrongdoing in and of itself."

(and i do have a guilty conscience, but i was raised catholic, my natural state is to assume i did something wrong even if i quantifiably didn't, lmao.)

but i would still catch little comments here and there, notice passive-aggressive tags on someone's post, or even just feel a vibe that kept me thinking... maybe i actually am accused of doing something.

so when That Blog started up (and yes i hate myself for being enthralled by it and i just blocked it because i know my curious monkey brain will continue leading me to the dark side if i don't), and i saw that i was explicitly accused of being a part of some inner cabal of 30-year-old women who were bullying everyone in lizzie's, i was like OH okay. so it wasn't paranoia, i was right. being friends with a few people who have been accused of wrongdoing and i guess... winning a photomode contest once was enough for some people to assume that i was one of the big baddies in the server? cool.

but the other big reason i didn't want to say anything publicly at the time was the two incidents that i was aware of did not involve me at all. i literally just did not do anything. and it wasn't my place then nor is it my place now to weigh in on other of those, especially in a public setting. i don't even want to say anything beyond this, really. i wasn't involved in any capacity, and i don't want to be involved. they're just not my conflicts.

and i know some people will take that stance in and of itself as being complicit or whatever, and that's your perogative, but i just don't feel right about inserting myself in a situation that never involved me. and i certainly don't want to drag anyone, friend or otherwise, into anything when they're probably trying to work past it in their own ways, too.

i'm also not even that pressed about people deciding they don't "trust" me or whatever for being friends (or just being friendly with--some of the people I'm accused of conspiring with i don't even know that well) with people they don't like. I'm sometimes wary of people who are friends with people i don't vibe with, too. i get it. so if you want to label me as guilty by association, knock your socks off. but just know that within the context of The Lizzie's Situation, that is the extent of my trangressions.

and outside of The Lizzie's Situation, the only two things i can think of that i did were 1) foot-in-mouth guide as addressed up there, which i really think is more of a miscommunication than an actual Bad Thing and 2) acting like an asshole in another server to someone because i was mad about how they treated my friends, which was still the wrong way to handle those feelings, and I apologized for the best way i can under the circumstances.

i genuinely cannot think of anything else I've done to cause harm to anyone in this fandom. even with people i don't like, i still don't want to hurt them. i just don't want to interact with them. if there is something else i did and you want to talk to me about it, i am open to hearing about that and doing what i can to alleviate that hurt (if it's possible, i know sometimes it's not) and making the effort to not do that again in the future.

i know i can't do anything about people who are already convinced that i am the devil, but i don't think i could really accept that and move on without at least getting my side out there. so if you read this, thank you.

that said, i do think i need to disconnect for a while so if anyone reaches out one way or the other, I'm taking the day off from social media, lol. maybe the weekend, idk, we'll see.

but yeah. that's it. thanks. 💙

[hexfloog]

So, ShinRan: think there's any way in hell it could actually work, even without the whole Conan thing?

Ehheh, so... a disclaimer: my brain is not really wired to think about ships or romance in general, and it's never been something I've devoted much thought to in any franchise, really. Idk if this is because I'm aro af or what and just don't have a radar for it (uncomfirmed), but I can think of a grand total of like two ships I actively enjoy... across all my fandoms. Mad respect for people who can put thoughtful effort into analyzing that sort of thing beyond surface-level cuteness (which is where I mostly stand on this), so that said, my thoughts on any kind of ship-- even ShinRan-- are incredibly scant, and at this point in time I subscribe to it mostly because it's overtly canon.

I think, subconsciously, I HC Shinichi as ace/heteroromantic. But he's a teenager, there's a lot of people who don't really know where they stand at that age and he's so engrossed in his passions (cough, work) outside of his personal life that he also probably just doesn't really know much in the way of intimacy outside of Ran, what with his absentee (also laissez-faire) parents and otherwise few friends. And even what he does know, I think, amounts to very little. In short, I think he's inexperienced and it translates to shaky ground on which to base my observations.*

*In all fairness, this is a bit hard for me to gauge as most of their interactions prior to Conan are told in flashback and simultaneously framed by both Ran and the show's narrative to keep Shinichi centered as the Hero... some conflicts of interest exist there, I think. Is Ran really just naïve, or is the narrative trying to justify Shinichi's sometimes tactlessness behavior for the sake of the audience?

Just in general though, I'm not a huge fan of the childhood sweetheart setup for a romantic relationship. It makes for some cute, fluffy content for sure, but as a healthy couple I think they would need more time to work things out-- which they won't have until the whole Conan thing resolves itself, honestly. He (Conan) does need to go before any real progress can be made; The Whole Situation is just such a huge hindrance to anything they could feasibly make progress on together for a variety of reasons... like being forced to communicate in secret all the time, to say the least. Personally, I even believe that the few times he's able to appear to her in his own body are even more damaging than if he just... didn't. The usual intent is to appease Ran's suspicions, yes? But... doesn't it end up being more detrimental than not? Like who else does he serve-- aside from scratching his own itch by proxy-- by transforming every now and then?

Speaking of Ran: I firmly believe she has some serious abandonment issues, caused by circumstances largely out of her control-- which Shinichi is absolutely not helping by being secretive all the time-- and I think what she really wants is stability, as a result. Her estranged parents forced her to grow up way too fast and even before Conan came under her wing she was already practically a young mother. (I just watched OVA 6, and it kinda hurt watching Shinichi flashback to watching her buy groceries growing up over the years, no doubt because Eri was no longer in the picture and Kogoro, the remaining parent, is Irresponsible.) She didn't choose that, this balancing act of keeping her father in check and trying to enjoy her youth, and if Shinichi is one of her only tethers to a way out of that, it's... not a particularly healthy setup to romance, imo. Maybe it's my complete lack of a shipping radar, maybe it's from personal experience, but I think that their relationship is less romantic at this stage and more "extremely good friends."

Anyway - you asked if I think it would work, and... Maybe? To us, the viewers, it feels like an eternity has elapsed in the DC-verse, but canonically it's only been what, a year or so? Even absent the Conan Predicament, I don't think they've been an item-- or even seriously thinking of themselves as an item-- for long enough to really know for sure. Given that they only became official in the midst of *gestures wildly* All of This I think I'd be making an unfair verdict when they started at a huge disadvantage in the first place.

All that said about Ran - I also think her desire for normalcy is what keeps her waiting for Shinichi. I don't think she'd let that go anytime soon, and also what I think could drive her motivation to make it work. I'm slightly less confident about Shinichi; he clearly cares deeply for her, but the ways he goes about showing it (ahem, the Big Secret) seems misguided at times, not to speak of the apparent temptation to usurp her place in his priorities with his passions (ahem, How This Whole Thing Got Started).

As an aside... one of several things I constantly hope for is more meaningful dialogue over the phone. Since it's their only real avenue of communicating until further notice, it's a window into the potentially uncomfortable and a way for the more troubled parts of their relationship to be explored, but like many things in this show, the possibility is merely teased and not tread. An example which comes to mind is their brief conversation from Movie 2, when Ran is confiding in Shinichi over the possibility Kogoro may have taken a needlessly reckless risk in Eri's hostage situation (Funi dialogue below):

"Hey, Rachel. It's been a while." "Jimmy?" "Dr. Agasa told me what's going on with your dad. I'm really sorry." "Sorry doesn't keep people alive, Jimmy! We need your help, get back here right away!" "I can't, I'm backed up with cases of my own. I won't be back there for some time." [Defeated] "...Yeah." "Now don't be like that, Rachel. Dr. Agasa brought me up to speed on the entire case, so if I can figure anything out, I'll let you guys know, okay?" [Pause] "Jimmy... would you have shot... me?" "Huh?" "Now I know... that's why she left. She could never trust him not to put her in danger again." [Pause] "I heard about that case, also. Richard shot her." "It doesn't matter how sure of himself he was, he shouldn't... have put his wife in jeopardy like that. You wouldn't have fired the gun if it were me, would you, Jimmy?" "Come on, Rachel. Don't ask me things like that."

Honestly the fact that Kogoro/Eri and Shinichi/Ran's relationship is often paralleled, I especially find the above conversation really intriguing (the stuff in bold) and I wish it weren't cut short--

TL;DR I'm not well-tuned to analyze ships, but as both Shinichi and Ran are still teenagers and the Current Circumstances keep getting in the way of their relationship... I think the possibility still exists to make things work, in spite of my believing the foundation of 'childhood sweetheart' is a bit rocky.

[elephantinparis]

A Sky beyond a Storm Review

If I could give this book -∞ rating I would. This review won’t be spoiler free, so if you haven’t read the book don’t read further. Now that that’s out of the way let’s get into it.

First of all, I want to start by saying how sad and angry I am to be writing this because this series had become one of my favorites and it completely disappointed me in the end. I’m not sure disappointment is even a proper word for what I’m feeling at this point. I also want to mention that yes, I am a huge fan of Nightbringer, but I wasn’t expecting a hea for him. What I was expecting was an arc true to his character from previous 3 books. Instead, what I got was a complete character assassination. It all started from the very first chapter–Nightbringer kills a small child, but at that point I was still trying to defend the book and genuinely thought: yes, it fits his character since he despises scholars. So even though I didn’t like it I understood. But then the complete character destruction started. First, we had a moment when he saw a happy family and went: yeah, I’ll kill the mother and the kids out of nowhere because they remind me of my family and if I can’t be happy no one can. Now, let me explain why this is ooc behavior: The Nightbringer as we knew him always had a beef with scholars only. The family he randomly kills are not scholars. Another thing: why would he put someone through the same agonizing pain when he is always specific about the deaths having meaning to him and that he doesn’t kill in vain(scholar killings are not in vain for him) other people, however, don’t fall into that category. Another ooc behavior moment was when he put one of his jinn in chains (yes only for a second and yes the jinn tried to use her influence on him), but the Nightbringer I know would never put his people through that after them spending an actual millennia in a prison. He spent so long trying to get them out, he would never put them in chains again. Then the cherry on the top of the cake was that all throughout the book the author tried to drive it home how much Nightbringer wanted Laia dead and how much he wanted, and I quote: “Open her up.” Another inconsistency since in Reaper he saved her more than once and completely let her go (because we know he loves her). Yes, he wanted to know what magic she possessed since the moment in Torch, but he had multiple opportunities to kill her and he never did. But in this book, he more than once physically assaults her when she’s in no position to truly hurt him and from his previous behavior that’s ooc actions. And you can come and say: but wait a minute Laia is a real threat now and that’s why he wants to kill her after he “opens her up” and I’ll point you to the chapter where he finally learns of his wife’s betrayal and understands what magic Laia possesses. And what does he do? He walks away. The man who spent the entire book hunting her down has her vulnerable, alone, he finally figured out the mystery of her powers and I am to believe from all his previous actions that he’ll kill her, but he DOESN’T. Because, of course, it’s not in the nature of his character to kill someone he loves even if they’re trying to stop him. So, which is it Sabaa? The inconsistencies are jarring. It just drives it home how his actions in this book were character assassination. The final nail in Nightbringer’s metaphorical coffin (because of course in the end he gets no funeral, no established peace, nothing. Unlike Keris…but I’ll get back to that later) is the fact that his evil villain plan is to literally end the world…I’m sorry WHAT?! So, in the span of this book he went from wanting scholars dead, then wanting all humans dead and then wanting the whole world to end which would result in his people dying, too. What in the actual hell is this?? So many possibilities could’ve been taken with this character, even if the author didn’t want to give him a redemption arc, he could have been a much better villain with a good goal. Instead we get this. Please someone try to explain WHY would he do this when he just freed his people? They would suffer just as much from his plan, so it makes no sense at all. His entire character was about protecting the jinn, giving them a safe space once he freed them. Another thing I noticed is that in the previous 3 books Nightbringer was very much humanized, embers and torch focused on him feeling again, his growth once he fell in love with Laia and even in Reaper his actions were tied to her, but in this book it’s completely forgotten. He does monstrous things to other people who aren’t scholars which was never his goal before. He had a millennium to set his anger and hurt on others, but he focused on those he felt were responsible for his life being ruined – the scholars. And yes, he was wrong to try to take revenge on people who didn’t do anything, but the point remains the Nightbringer I knew would have never done anything to jeopardize the jinn’s safety. Even as a villain his story went in a very cruel direction. I never praised Leigh Bardugo’s depiction of her villain Darkling, but maybe I should’ve since she gave him the bare minimum and Nightbringer didn’t even get that. Funny that the author has said on more than one occasion he was her favorite character. I shudder to think what she would’ve done if she disliked him. 

Another character who was treated with cruelty all throughout the story is Helene. Now I’ve got to give credit where it’s due - Helene grew a lot throughout the series: she shed her prejudices, finally acknowledged she had been protecting the wrong people and that martials need to change, she also grew as an incredible leader and a warrior and when the people chose her to be their Empress I was so proud, but then…she made her vow. To never marry, to never have children (which is totally fine since it was even mentioned she didn’t want them earlier), to completely give herself to her duty to the empire. It rubbed me the wrong way immediately because a big part of her arc was love–love for Elias who rejected her, love for her family–who got slaughtered before her eyes, love for Avitas–who also was killed for no real reason other than to make her suffer even more. And what does this show? It shows to Helene that love isn’t her friend because it only brings her pain, she lets people in, loves them with every part of her soul and they end up dying. So, at this point we have a young woman who started the series thinking she wasn’t worthy of love end up thinking love itself wasn’t worth it. How messed up is that? Still as cruel as this arc was it was at least consistent or that’s what I thought. In her very last chapter, it’s heavily alluded she might have something with Musa. And if it was written as just two friends grieving their lost loves it wouldn’t have bothered me at all. But there were clear romantic undertones and then I was left thinking: what? I thought she chose only her duty. And though Avitas was barely a few weeks in the ground at that point I couldn’t even fault Helene for wanting to move on because I just wanted her to be happy again. But at the same time, I cannot ignore the inconsistencies. The cruelty she experienced was too much.

It’s ironic how two of my favorite characters got the short end of the stick.

I don’t really have much to say about Elias since he didn’t really have his own plot, he was just inserted into Laia’s. His ending was by no means earned and I know it’s hard to say that because he had gone through so much in the first 2 books. But ever since Torch he made a conscious choice to become the Soul Catcher. Sure, he only did it to save Laia’s brother, but he made a vow to serve and he completely disregarded his job after the fact. I think if the ghosts that got out in Reaper didn’t hurt anyone, he would have continued to ignore the duty he himself chose. Now in this book he could’ve had an interesting development since he didn’t remember his past life, but this was resolved in the very beginning when Cain somehow gave the memories back. Then in the very end for a quick resolve someone just took over his job and Mauth was okay with it. The person who took over was just brought back for plot convenience and it makes me so mad. He didn’t earn the freedom…

Then we have Laia. The problem I had with her character in general is the fact she disregarded her past with Nightbringer. She can be in love with Elias and acknowledge what she felt for Nightbringer. Alas, she only sees a monster, shows no compassion once she learns of his story and since she spent all the book trying to kill him and not just stop him the very end felt hollow when  she suddenly starts showing compassion to a suffering Nightbringer. Laia from Torch showed compassion and understanding in her own way toward Nightbringer and now it was just gone. She was still conflicted and in this she’s completely closed off. I don’t think her romance with Elias would’ve suffered if her very real past with Nightbringer was acknowledged properly.

I also want to talk about Rehmat (Nightbringer’s wife). We learn that she had a gift of seeing the future and once the war started and she lost their children she saw what Nightbringer would become. So, what does she do? Does she go to her husband and tell him what she saw, tries to change the future, show him that even when she’s gone, he can go on and be who he was always meant to be? Beloved. Hell no she goes to humans and uses blood magic to extract her essence and be put in the progeny of a random tribe. Then waits a millennium to kill her husband. What in the world is this?? The reason why she does this is never addressed. So, as a reader I must make assumptions that she never loved him. That she didn’t even try to change anything. She also could’ve told him of her plan so he could’ve found someone to awaken her sooner so they could once again be together. He was deeply hurt and alone without their people and she left him too. Tell me how you bring in this new force and you don’t even explain her actions? How is this good writing?

Now I want to talk about the death count and if the deaths had any meaning. Got to start by saying that only supporting characters were killed.  First, we have Darin. Killed by Nightbringer because he wanted Laia to kill him for his plan. See, the thing is Laia already wanted to kill him throughout the book, she got the weapon and she came there with the goal of killing him. Nightbringer didn’t need to “encourage” her by killing Darin. So, in my opinion the death was pointless and served no great purpose. It was a way to make the reader hate the villain, sympathize with the heroine and was done for shock value. Livia was another character to suffer a pointless death. She was the only person Helene had. There was no reason to do it same with Avitas. I guess for Avitas I could try to excuse it by saying it’s war and he did die on the battlefield. Keris had always been a great fighter and even Helene couldn’t take her on. But she already lost Livia and now this?? Too much. Too cruel. Livia’s ending could’ve also been written off as a war casualty, but she wasn’t actively participating in the war. Sure, she was the Empress Regent, but to me it’s just too much after her family. Both deaths only caused Helene pain and she didn’t gain anything profound from those losses. Lastly, I truly hated how the author tried to humanize Keris Veturia. And when I say tried, I really mean it because at least for me it didn’t work. The author suddenly had her saying she couldn’t kill Elias when time came even though she already had. She poisoned him and he died because of her. That woman first abandoned him, then tortured him throughout his time at Blackcliff and then in the end cost him his life. And Elias mourned her…She also had a lovely send off in the Waiting place where she found piece with her mother. So then if this villain deserved peace why didn’t the other one? At least Nightbringer had his reasons. We never knew hers.

In conclusion, I don’t understand how the story could’ve gone so wrong. As always everything you read is my personal thoughts and my humble opinion.

Tagging: @nightbringer @bookittothelibrary we suffered so much...I can’t.

[earthingoddity]

so you know how y’all are constantly like: “what’s there to like about season five???”. i decided to make a list *-*

1. the discussion of disability in a teenage show. how many teenage shows can you name featuring disabled characters? and how many of those feature a character becoming disabled in the course of the show and having to adapt to that? i was very surprised when i realized this was the route they were going to take this season and i think it was very well done.

so let’s break that down:

1.1 they actually made sure to talk about other disabilities. i know some people will say they were just doing the bare minimum, but i disagree. that is such a complex theme, they could’ve easily said representing other disabilities respectfully would be a lot of work for only ten episodes, but they did their best with the limited amount of time they had.

1.2 the representation of the deaf community wasn’t limited to their disability. it actually pisses me off hearing people say “wow, for a while there, i even forgot arthur was deaf!” as if he *has* to let you know everytime he’s on screen. disabled people are more than their disabilities, thank you very much.

1.3 overall, it was a positive representation. they could’ve spent so much time going through all the things that would be too hard for arthur, but they actually had an entire episode where arthur was completely deaf - he took his hearing aids off - and it was a very happy and positive episode. he was having fun, clubbing, dancing, laughing with others, and i think we took a lot of that for granted in the midst of everything that was going on, but that was a really positive representation that didn’t limit itself to stereotypes around deaf/disabled people. i actually expected that they’d drag a lot longer the feeling of loneliness and discomfort of the first couple of episodes, but they quickly changed that rhythm, so that instead of focusing on what arthur was “losing”, they focused on everything that arthur was gaining - new friends, a new love interest and a new way to see the world. also, in relation to the whole implants thing, they delivered very in depth opposite perspectives on the matter and never felt like they were shaming one group or the other.

2. SyMbOLisM! skam france is very good at it and they nailed this aspect in season three. but there was a lot of it in season five as well. like the 7am clips in episode 2, that were used to show the lack of progression in arthur’s hearing and his growing frustration and how those clips were incredibly dark, to match his mood. episode 7 also had such an interesting meaning. with arthur taking the chance to explore the world without his hearing aids, he got to explore a whole *new* world, and not a lacking one, which ties very well with what i just said about being a positive rep, but also shows that the entire episode wasn’t about arthur finding a new layer of himself, but rather him just uncovering one that was already there.

3. use of music/sound effects. it can be hard to represent deafness in a media like a tv show, but skam france did it so well. the use of music is always very conscious in this remake; while others really go hard in the soundtrack, skam france hardly ever has background music, unless it means something. another small thing but that i loved was whenever arthur was taking off/putting on his hearing aids, if he was to put the left one first for example, the sound on the left side of your headphone would start first. it was such a small thing but made the experience a lot more immersive imo, as well as the use of muffled sounds, pitching, etc.

4. Arthur. i am always surprised whenever i hear people say that they liked arthur better when they were not in his pov. i completely disagree, but then again, i feel like this fandom has very unhealthy expectations on their mains, as if they haven’t watched already 4 seasons of the main making mistakes over and over again, lol. i loved getting to know more of arthur - he’s loyal AF and protective of the people he loves. he struggles in letting people in, though, and never wants to be a burden or worry others. he’s perceptive and quick to notice when his friends need help. he is also short-tempered and when he gets mad, it is explosive, but he doesn’t hold grudges for long. he was a much more complexed character than i imagined and he totally made this season for me.

5. le gang. this boysquad is the best, sorry. they’ve always been the funniest and warmest, but it was really nice how s5 explored all the sides of that relationship, including the not so pretty ones. they were the relationship i wanted the most angst from, and i am so happy i got it. i loved seeing how chaotic, but supportive they were of arthur though and they brought so many laughs this season.

5.1 the lack of toxic masculinity. i think this ties well with arthur, because it is amazing to me that even though we were following a straight white boy as a main this season, we had no moments of unhealthy masculine competition; le gang could actually talk about other things rather than just porn stars and jerking off (other boysquads Wish!); and arthur would literally flirt with anyone without a care in the world, because he’s certain of his sexuality like that. it was *refreshing* for once not to be confronted with these tropes that have become so common in teenage shows.

7. alexia. i have to talk about alexia separately here, because that’s the most we’ve ever seen from a chris character (not counting eskam cris, ofc), and i loved her so much. she wants to be a videogame designer and she’s creative and adorable. she always knew how to make arthur laugh, but also knew when he needed words of affirmation and she was never shy in telling him how much she loved him. it was also amazing seeing her open up about some of her insecurities, and that her confidence is something she had to work on as well. she was such a great friend & girlfriend and just ugh the best.

7.1 the female characters are badass and unapologetic. i am aware that the love triangle was unnecessary and a mess. but i am not mad about the way both characters were represented, because they were both great characters. i liked alexia more simply because i was already attached to her from previous seasons, but noée was badass as well and teaches arthur so much, and not only about her experience as a deaf person, but about life/love in general.

8. arthur’s relationship with his mom. we LOVE and STAN parents in the skamverse. arthur and his mom had the best relationship ever; i loved how they truly became a team by the end of the season. but since the moment she showed up, it meant so much that arthur could have at least one supportive and loving parent, no matter how much he screwed up or felt lost. his mom was really trying her best and i adored her.

9. *actual* adult advice. i understand why all the adults in the skamverse are a bit cringey and weird, but i feel like this results in these characters relying on each other’s poor advice throughout an entire season before they realize what they actually should do. and the talk with the school’s nurse and his doctor by the end of the season was meaningful AF and i wish something the remakes would explore more often, because it could resolve so many of their issues just talking to someone who knows better, lol.

10. the relationships with the girlsquad. i know this is actually very intentional of skam france - to build a specific kind of dynamic between the main and all the side characters. we saw that in season 3, and i think it’s a lot more evident here, but it still made a lot of sense and warmed my heart so much. arthur and imane were the purest - she was the first one to notice that something was wrong with him and also reached out to give him advice on how medical school could still be a possibility even with his disability when she absolutely didn’t have to, but she’s just a sweetheart like that. arthur and daphné had a lot more tension, which is understandable, because both are protective of their own best friends (bas and alexia) and would defend them to the ends of the earth. i think they honestly have a lot more in common than they think. but my favorite dynamic was arthur and emma. i totally did not expect for emma to have such a part in this season, but every single one of their interactions was Gold. emma could see a lot of herself in arthur and i think that’s why she was so quick to notice that he wasn’t interested in becoming a surgeon at all. that scene when she says it would’ve been nice to have arthur as a brother was the sweetest thing Ever.

11. i’ll finish with the acting. y’all, the guy who plays arthur literally CARRIED this season and i hope his back is doing fine. he was So powerful - he made me cry, and laugh, and feel frustrated. he delivered every single emotion perfectly. i also think that the fact these actors are friends irl (i assume? lol but i think i’ve seen them in each other’s personal IG stories) really helps their chemistry on camera. le gang feels like a group of brothers/best friends and they were always so natural and effortless in their interactions. the new actors also Rocked and delivered so much emotion even if they were using a completely different language and it was awesome.

(also, this just literally applies to *me*, a lucas lallemant HOE, but it was so nice seeing lucas up close from a different perspective. the fact we could still see so many layers of him: his emotional self, his bratty self, his supportive self, even a touch on his abandonment issues and everything made me so happy. i think sometimes i forget the lucas character was real and not something i made up because he feels too good to be true, and it was really interesting seeing him from arthur’s POV).

i’m not here defending the mistakes they made in s5, i don’t think it’s a perfect season either, but tbh i have yet to find what i consider to be a perfect season in the skamverse, so here’s just some things i liked about this season that i feel like y’all should take into consideration as well. thx

[metallicarules5]

Callum should not forgive Rayla so easily. He should get mad, grow a pair, and call her out, and that’s okay.

Before I get into this post, I want to start off by saying that Rayla is easily my favorite character in the show, I ship Rayllum, I want to see them get back together, I understand the motivation behind Rayla’s decision at the end of Through the Moon, and I know Callum is not the character that will often hold grudges and is willing to put his own feelings aside when it comes to doing the right thing (returning Zym despite Avizandum killing his mother). That being said, I’m worried the writers are going to downplay Callum’s reaction and the inevitable reunion between him and Rayla.

With how the creators have said that one does not need to have read TTM before going into S4, and that fans who didn’t will still understand what’s going on, it makes me worried that this monumental decision that Rayla made, which should have huge ramifications for both herself, the plot, and the people she cares about, especially Callum, will not be fully realized. And the aspect that has me the most worried is how Callum and Rayla’s eventual reunion will play out and both of their feelings towards the other as a result of Rayla’s decision. 

Callum is certainly a very understanding and sympathetic person, especially when it comes to Rayla. While it has been shown that even he has his limits with her (criticizing Rayla wanting to stay and die at the Storm Spire, saying it’s just pride, or their argument in TTM after Phoe-Phoe’s rebirth), he’s still willing to do so much and go well out of his way to help Rayla. It is something definitely to be admired and what makes Callum such a great character and their relationship so healthy. My worry though is, when they do reunite, will it be another breaking point, or will he easily accept it and move on? And if you ask me, it should be a breaking point, and a big one at that.

Everyone’s talked a lot about what this means for Rayla, and rightfully so as her arc in S4 and beyond is going to rely heavily on her actions. But this is also going to hopefully have an impact on Callum, who has also lost several people he loves and cares about and has also struggled with his own feelings of inferiority and not being good enough. Rayla leaving might exacerbate these feelings within him, or even break a lot of the trust he had in her, among other things Callum can go through. It should leave him broken, it should leave him hurt, it should leave him feeling betrayed and lied to, all of this (on top of everything Rayla herself will go through) should lead to a huge confrontation and hard fought, but well earned reconciliation that leaves both of them better characters and in an even healthier spot in their relationship. So why is it that I feel this isn’t what we’re going to get? Well, mainly it has to do with what I said above, the creators said TTM isn’t necessary to read. 

It perplexes me how something as monumental as the ending is deemed as not necessary to know before going in. And the only way I can see that being true, is if a lot of the emotional impact that should come from Rayla’s actions is ultimately downplayed, and as a result, Callum’s reaction to it. It worries me that, when the two do eventually get back together and reunite, Callum is more likely going to be completely forgiving and understanding, that her decisions will bare no impact on him or his feelings of inferiority and trust. That it’s going to pretty much play out similar to his use of dark magic, that Rayla was mad at him, but quickly moved on from it after he started to have difficulty breathing. That, ultimately, he’s just going to be happy to see her alive, and with little or minimal effort, they’ll get back together and patch things up. While Callum’s understanding of Rayla’s feelings has been a huge benefit for him, enabling Rayla to be more open with him as a result when it is something she has never truly been able to do based on Moonshadow culture and her upbringing, in this particular scenario, it could be a hindrance to not only Callum, but Rayla, and ultimately, their relationship.  

Callum should be pissed at her, and he has every right to be. Even if he does understand her reasoning, it still hurts him greatly, and it is something he can and should get angry over. He should question Rayla, he should call her out on the stuff she has done, he should make Rayla face the consequences of her actions, even if it hurts her to hear him say it. Why? Because it could be the only thing that finally gets it through to Rayla that her way of doing things, her way of looking at herself, is painful and damaging to more people than just herself. Honestly, Callum needs to man up and grow a pair when the two reunite, that would be a much better way of resolving this plot thread. It has a huge amount of emotional baggage for the two to work through, but doesn’t come off as forced or unearned. It’s both of them coming face to face with their insecurities and demons, eventually leading to both becoming better people, their relationship becoming stronger than it has ever been, and would be a hard fought, exhausting, but ultimately satisfying resolution to both their individual and romantic arcs. 

But with the way things are, I don’t think that’s going to be how it plays out. It feels more than likely the writers are going to puss out on the emotional impact this will have on Callum, that he’s going to be either completely understanding or only slightly hurt by it, that they’ll get back together with little to no consequences for Rayla to face, and that’s going to be it. No, that should not be how it goes down. That’s not fixing any of the problems in both Callum or Rayla, that’s just covering them up. They’re still there, it’s just not being addressed and allowed to continue festering until it eventually breaks again. 

Callum should be angry, he has every right to be. I don’t want him to be a pushover and allow Rayla to get away with hurting him like this. I’m not saying he should be guilting Rayla to purposely hurt her just for the sake of hurting her or to make him feel better by making her feel bad, but he does need to show her a lot of tough love, and that’s ultimately what their reunion should consist of from him, tough love towards Rayla. Telling her stuff that she doesn’t want to hear, but desperately needs to hear. And even if it means that they have to be broken up for a while (like actually broken up, not just Rayla leaving), then so be it, so long as it has a good payoff in the end. Rayla’s behavior is incredibly damaging to herself and those around her, and she needs to face those consequences. Callum will forgive her, there’s no question about that because that’s just who he is, but it needs to be a struggle for both of them, but especially Rayla, not something that should be glossed over. 

It’s not that I don’t have faith in the writers, I just don’t see a way out of this that isn’t one of these two options, and the one I presented makes TTM more than just supplemental material and thus, goes against the whole “not necessary” part. 

[reachexceedinggrasp]

Fated to Love You here reaffirming my long held conviction that no pure romance drama should be 20+ episodes.

This show is... really something. It is, in the fullest possible sense, A Lot. It starts out as an all-out screwball comedy wrapped around a troperiffic romance fluff plot. Wall to wall clichés, but not in a bad way; in a meta, self-aware, peak performance, finest Velveeta way. And if you’re not familiar with screwball comedy, think ‘light-hearted crack fic with slapstick and farce’. There is nothing believable or grounded about any aspect of it, it starts at Bonkers Level: Platinum and it only climbs higher as it goes on.

(On a side note, this results in the leading man being possibly the most memorable love interest in romcom history. His introduction scene is nothing short of batshit insane and you can't reliably predict how he will respond to anything. I have never seen a main character like this, he is all over the shop and utterly singular. Your first reaction to him is ‘wtf?’, your second and third reactions are ‘really?! this guy??’, your fourth reaction is ‘okay he do be mad hot tho’, your fifth and final reaction is ‘I cannot believe this performance exists, I have no idea what he is doing, but it is amazing.’

Appropriately(?) the actor who plays him is an uncanny Korean doppelgänger of Johnny Depp and- between the resemblance, the mannerisms, and the fearless total commitment to a bold as fuck acting choice with the very serious chops to back it up- I’m not convinced they aren’t half brothers separated at birth.

They do sabotage my happiness several times by starting to randomly style his (long, beautiful) hair very weird, fixing it right when the plot is rapidly circling the drain so he looks his hottest just as the show becomes briefly unwatchable, and then ruining him for the entire second half of the series by shearing it all off. WHY, my anguished cry goes up. Why do you do this?! Why does he have like seven hairstyles over the course of the show? Much later they even briefly give him that ubiquitous Kdrama Second Lead haircut with weirdly forward combed fringe in a solid straight line across the brow all the way back from the crown. It looks terrible on everyone and I hate it so much. This version was less bad than most but it is still bad. Anyway.)

So it’s an incredibly fun time to start but there are some problems with the tone and plot even in the first 9 episodes, including when the lovers start getting along really well right away and they’re both thoroughly decent people so there’s nothing keeping them from having a lovely time together making the best of the circumstances (forced/fake marriage). And, instead of introducing new conflict or advancing one of the dozen conflicts previously established and actually moving forward, there is a painfully contrived rehash of something they already dealt with which is then just never resolved. They make the hero leap to a conclusion his wife is nefarious after he’d already decided once that she isn’t (though it was completely reasonable for him to think she was- the fact that he decided to trust her so quickly just speaks to what kind of person he is), never try to find out more or talk to anyone about it, start pushing her away because of it, and have all this come to absolutely nothing. It only exists so he’ll stop being so incredibly nice to her and they won’t fall in love too fast.

You’d think they would have to eventually clear the air before the romance advances right? No. It wasn’t a real plot point, it was just a reset button to get them estranged and hostile again after they connect over their kindred spirits and we’ve spent a bunch of time showing how profoundly supportive and honourable our hero is. He’s being beautifully mature and selfless because he’s a really good dude (unusual for a romcom drama, right? for the main guy to be nice and considerate? to accept responsibility even if he doesn’t have to? Gun’s weird but he’s wonderful), but the writers need him to be cold and standoffish, so they just make him act like an unreasonable idiot for a while. He’s been thus far hugely proactive and direct and honest about everything, it’s one of his most prominent character traits, but suddenly he’s going to avoid confrontation in favour of being super passive aggressive?? Then the writers never solve it. Never! It just goes away. He got over it, I guess? He decided he doesn’t care if she’s a gold digger who deliberately trapped him? God forbid we have motivations that make sense and organic character drama, right? It's not like he didn't have totally valid reasons to be suspicious that could have led to legitimate conflict our heroine would struggle to vindicate herself from.

But anyway, apart from that kind of lazy bullshit, it’s a fine romance plot with extremely endearing characters who have great chemistry. They are fun and well-rounded and incredibly human despite all the silliness and OTT antics. Their relationship is hugely, hugely engaging and the dynamic is perfect, they really complement each other as characters and organically drive each other's arcs. There's the genuine depth and warmth and quiet pathos so often lacking from this kind of show. Things progress at a semi-reasonable pace. They work up to confessing their mutual feelings and get into some cute shenanigans before making out. It happens soon enough that you are not frustrated, but there's still plenty of build-up. Then- uh oh! We’re only 9 eps in and we have another 11 hours to fill with this fluffy plot!

Time for a bunch of absolute fucking nonsense. Time for our show, which has been so goofy and removed from reality it occasionally resembles a Monty Python skit, which has been so light it asks you to ignore the frankly incredibly fucked up implications of its premise for the sake of comedy (they were both drugged and proxy raped resulting in a pregnancy- the FL was a virgin prior to this and Gun had a girlfriend he wanted to propose to- and it was the FL’s family who did this to them: SUPER FUCKED UP), so farcical that it makes Some Like it Hot look like a gritty crime drama, that show to cover a bunch of serious heavy shit.

First, the rankest of melodrama. The families and the world all turn on our couple, but their love is true and will conquer all- UNTIL, he randomly collapses and gets convenient Soap Opera Amnesia. He’s forgotten their entire relationship and a series of coincidental pieces of misconstrued evidence, the machinations of his scheming ex girlfriend, the Soap Opera Doctor’s advice, and his closest confidants all going along with this conspire to make him believe (AGAIN) that his wife just wants his money.

This whole terrible episode is mercifully brief, but it just gets worse after his memory returns. This is where we get into the Noble Idiocy. The ‘pretend you don’t love them to “save them” from getting hurt by hurting them and making their important life decisions for them as if they don’t have a basic fucking right to decide that themselves’ kind. Which goes on for three FUCK years in the show. He wastes three years of their lives they could have spent together because he’s worried he might die young (in a terrible way) and doesn’t want to put her through that. And, of course, they inevitably get together later, so all he did was make it infinitely worse for her either way. To say nothing of how he thus couldn’t be there for her through the loss of their child. Possibly my most hated fucking trope of all time when done this way.

And, yep, you read that right. This show that has the single most batshit bonkers over the top slapstick I have ever seen in a kdrama, this show has a storyline where the fluffy romcom trope accidental pregnancy ends in massive trauma. Because she was standing around in the street after realising he does remember her (he continued to pretend he had amnesia after his memories came back, it’s all part of the stupid noble idiocy so I glossed over it) and gets hit by a car in the middle of their angst staring.

It is nearly Meet Joe Black levels of hilariously abrupt and incongruous.

so, blah blah, they lose their baby (there’s a very stupid whole thing about her telling everyone to save the baby instead of her- the baby is not far enough along for this to have been remotely viable. She is like 3 months pregnant. They all act like there’s a choice to be made between them and she’s mad at her husband for choosing to save her, but there was NO CHOICE. Either she lives or they both die! ffs I’m so irritated about this) and then he dumps her ~for her own good~~ because he loves her too much to make her go through losing him? So she loses him sooner?? right after their baby died???

Why do people in these stories always think being betrayed and abandoned for no reason and being incredibly angry at someone you love while also not getting to be with them is somehow less painful than making the best of your life together and then losing them against their will? ‘I will make her hate me and then she won’t be sad we broke up/I died!!!!’ is such a fucking galaxy brain take and I despise it with the heat of ten thousand suns. Fuck you, Spider-Man. You aren’t protecting anyone, the villains still know you love MJ and will still use her against you, you clod. Emotionally torturing the person you love is not going to make them not a target because the villains are not as fucking stupid as you two. Anyway.

Amnesia was right where I started fast-forwarding and skipping around (because I couldn’t bear it), but it only goes downhill from there. Maybe I would have toughed out more of the wretched middle part plot twist if they hadn’t cut all the hot guy’s hair off. If I’m going to watch total nonsense tedious melodrama, I need it to at least be pretty. I understand it was a Symbolic Haircut but damnit! Let me have this!

And it ultimately does the thing that kdramas seem obsessed with and which makes me want to claw out my own eyeballs with frustration. There’s a giant time skip, the female lead gets a personality transplant, all narrative momentum is lost, and the characters who eventually (at ENORMOUS length) get together permanently are essentially completely different characters with a completely different dynamic than the couple you were shipping for 90% of the story. It is so FUCKING unsatisfying and it is EVERYWHERE.

Not so much with this one because this one still had a lot of very romantic scenes late in the game, but most that do this, it’s also like all the romance is sucked out of the post-time skip episodes and the ending is a consolation prize instead of a triumphant culmination. Inevitably, the heroine abruptly cools off and is suddenly wary of the hero and wants this Important New Career she never mentioned until the penultimate episode but is now her one true life’s dream. What the apparently irresistible appeal is of these contrived separations and demure conclusions is I CANNOT FATHOM. I’m here for the fucking romance guys, you have not made Citizen Kane, please just indulge me with a big schmoopy finale.

And if not that, it’s frequently that there’s been so many random mood swings and so much shitty behaviour by the end that the relationship doesn’t make sense and you don’t know why they even bother to get back together.

I’m not inherently against all misunderstandings (they are the bread and butter of low stakes romance let’s be real) or attempts at noble idiocy from misguided characters, but the duration and seriousness of the drama these generate needs to be in proportion to how ridiculous they are. If your entire plot can be solved by a thirty second conversation there is NO REASON not to have and the continuation of the misunderstanding is a result of someone just NOT SPEAKING UP when any functional human being would have spoken up seven times by now IT’S BAD.

Do little cliff-hangers, whatever, but don’t draaaaagg out silly misconceptions into Shakespearean tragedy, it’s just wearying. It makes me hate the characters for acting like emotionally constipated toddlers with terminal stupidity. If there is so little trust, so little understanding, and so little basic patience between these people, they probably shouldn’t be dating, so try fucking harder, writers. And noble idiocy that is more than an impulse they fairly quickly see the error of is just insulting. You are not helping the other person, you are being domineering and selfish. I have a whole complex about wasting time and seeing endless parades of characters flushing years down the toilet for literally no reason gives me hives. Especially when the whole issue is about time!

(And, btw, so much of the plot is about how desperately the family needs an heir and everyone still wanting them to have kids the second time they get together- while the ~dilemma used to keep them apart is a GENETIC DISEASE which could STRIKE AT ANY TIME. Do you SEE THE PROBLEM WITH THIS WRITERS????? NO, I KNOW YOU DON’T. ommmmmmmmggggg that’s awful! So they’re just dooming more kids to Soap Opera Brain Disease? And maybe growing up without a father just as Gun did? And no one even considers suggesting adoption??? He never considers that he shouldn’t have biological children despite thinking he shouldn’t have a wife?)

ANYWAY. Please do watch the first nine episodes and the last three, it’s bananas. They are cute as fuck, Gun is The Best, and the tropey romance scenes are top quality. You don't get those things executed so well, it doesn't happen, so you need this in your life. The acting is of a calibre you never usually see in modern romcoms; these are people at the top of their game committing utterly and taking these characters completely seriously. In that way it is pure wish fulfilment for me as someone who loves romance and is almost always disappointed by popular romance media, and thus the show is incalculably special. But skip the middle. Just skip it. It's not worth the suffering. I find the tone whiplash honestly just this side of crass.

I’ve been thinking about it for over a week and I truly love the main characters so it did plenty right, but I just cannot with wedding the two things this show is trying to be together, especially when it goes so hard in two mutually exclusive directions. but also the Meet Joe Black sudden car accident device is not redeemable under any circumstances. Can we never do that again, please.

[geekmedium]

Jack Kirby’s Jimmy Olsen

So I just got through reading the first omnibus in Jack Kirby’s Fourth World saga. I’m gonna try to make my way through every last one in order to see what the big deal is and analyze why they have such imaginative power while other Jack Kirby creations like the Eternals went down the memory hole.

And honestly this isn’t an auspicious way to start. I had wondered for a while why Jimmy Olsen isn’t really recommended in the New Gods Saga and now I know why. It’s barely a New Gods book. The only connections to the New Gods are:

Mokkari and Simyan as the recurring antagonists

Morgan Edge working for Darkseid (which isn’t resolved in this book)

Lightray appearing for a scene

Clark spending an issue in New Genesis

A few references to the Forever People

Not exactly the best intro to the War of the New Gods. In fact I would describe this book more as New Gods clean up. It spends more time dealing with threats that are the spillover of war rather than confronting the war directly.

The real through line of these tales is “The Project.” A genetics facility that would later be known as Project Cadmus.

Mokkari and Simyan create threats based on Cadmus tech. Superman and Jimmy deal with the monsters of a Cadmus scientist. We meet the D.N.Alien Dubbilex who investigates a secret passage to Cadmus. Heck the entire story starts with Jimmy investigating a wildness group that uses technology left over from Cadmus. If you’re someone who likes Project Cadmus then this is a highly recommended collection for you.

I think the biggest revelation was that Superman was a partner and firm advocate for the Project. Literally every piece of superhero media I’ve watched portrayed Project Cadmus as morally dubious at best, so it’s kind of surreal that Kirby intended them to be good guys. Especially since a lot of stuff they do in this book is still morally dubious. They create human clones (seemingly without permission) and employ mad scientists. Some of their soldiers are children or teens and they seem really intent on keeping all this literal life changing tech undercover. It’s kind of wild that Kirby framed all of this in the narrative as morally good without questioning it at all. Then again, wasn’t eugenics a well thought of science back in the day? I figured it died out in the 50s or so, but maybe a lot of people still agreed with it in the early 70s.

Anyway, the real reason why I think Project Cadmus is the focal point is that it allowed Kirby to work where he shines brightest. Big ideas.

Someone once described Jack Kirby as a hundred ideas per square inch, and it’s hard to disagree when reading through this. Small planets, D.N.Aliens, the Habitat, Zoomway, and the solar phone are just some of the inventions that fill the pages of this collection and I purposely left out the stuff connected with New Gods like the Boom Tube. But more than just making cool technology, Jack gave Superman cool threats.

It can be hard coming up with challenges for any incarnation of the Man of Steel, and I have to imagine the Bronze Age one was one of the hardest. But reading through these I’m amazed with how rarely I felt the threat was below Superman. And I think that comes down to the fact that rarely was Kirby trying to write a cosmic wrestling match. His solution to problems had a more cerebral element to them, and required Superman to get creative or even occasionally play for a more peaceful resolution. I think my favorite was when he saved Cadmus from a collection of atomic energy eaters in like 10 seconds.

In fact, Kirby wrote an absolutely fantastic Superman. Strong, clever, mature, creative, kind, and badass. I said it can be hard to write for Superman, and I think a lot of comic writers think that decreasing him makes him work better, but Kirby knew that all you really have to do is make the threats bigger. And this cosmic war of gods, with Earth as just a casualty in the way, is about as big as you can get. And as a result, the Superman that emerges here is all the stronger for facing these threats as they come one by one while also trying to help start a whole new branch of science that these monsters threaten or distort. While this isn’t much of a New Gods book, I consider it a bit of a hidden classic for Bronze Age Superman stories.

But what about the titular character of Jimmy Olsen? Well honestly, he really ends up playing a side character in his own book. And I’m fine with that, because I think Jimmy only really works as a spotlight character once every couple dozen of issues, but if you are reading these stories for him, you’ll probably be disappointed. It’s not that he has nothing to do, but when your book has New Gods and Superman and genetic warfare and interdimensional schemes of every shape and size, you’re just gonna have to play second or even third billing. To be fair, no other main player in the Superman mythos can really tag along either. Lois is nowhere to be seen, I think Perry White only shows up once, and while Morgan Edge is a small antagonists, he really only acts as an orchestrator instead of a major player. They are all gone to make room for the Newsboy Legion.

And man do the Newsboy Legion just barge into the story. Sometimes literally.

Kirby seemed to really want to make them a thing again like when he wrote them in the 40s. It kind of reminds me of how J.M. DeMatteis tried to put Vermin in a lot of his stories. And just like with Vermin, they really end up over staying their welcome.

They were fine in the first two or three issues, but around the time the Outsiders (no not those Outsiders, a different one) exit the story, the NL should have left too. They could return for a story or two, but no more. Instead Kirby makes sure they appear in every single story in this omnibus, including ones where they aren’t really needed. Oh no! Jimmy has been ambushed and Clark has been sent off to Apokolips with no way to return. Quick, let’s go see what hijinks the Newsboy Legion are getting up to. Like, I don’t hate them, and giving Superman super wacky kids who support him in his adventures isn’t a setup I’m adverse to, since that’s basically what Jimmy was for the Silver/Bronze Age. But man, the 70s slang and rapscallion attitude you see in the panel above is only a little of what shows up, and it gets really grating after a while.

On top of that were some other weird cast choices. I actually really like the Golden Guardian’s setup as a genetically made man with memories implanted with those of a dead man. I really looked forward to him relearning his past life while making a new one in Metropolis as much needed backup for Superman. But he honestly ends up as just a kind of Captain America clone

He also ends up just dropping out of the story later on. Not even leaving, it’s just that one scene he is with Superman exploring the city and the next Superman is off exploring a secret tunnel with Dubbilex and not-Lois character Terry Dean.

And speaking of Terry Dean I find it just hilarious that she is in this panel. Superman and the others are exploring secret entrances and contemplating literal apocalyptic war, and she’s just kind of...there. For those who don’t know or care, according to my research she is a character who showed up once before Kirby came on the Jimmy title, twice after he left it, and then one more time eighteen years later as a deep cut in Superman vol 2. #46.

If I seem to be nitpicking, it’s just that it’s so weird Kirby would go for this character instead of bringing in Lois. And he includes another weird character named Goody Rickels for like two or three issues for a story arc I’m gonna have to reread just to understand what the point of it was.

Still, ignoring these flaws, the Jack Kirby’s Jimmy Olsen Omnibus is a recommend if for nothing else than the fact that it is a good set of Superman stories with incredibly inventive and creative plots that hint at a larger world on the horizon. And I honestly can’t wait to tackle that new world of New Gods.

[celtics534]

Power (Covert Love Chapter 10)

Here we go! Hope y’all ready for some drama 😉. This chapter’s title comes from the song Power by Bastille 

Also Read on: FF.net or AO3

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“Fuck, Potter, you weren’t messing around!” Holt cheered as the team walked back into the locker room after their victory flight. 

 Harry shrugged, his cheeks turning pink. Ginny knew better than most how awkward compliments made Harry. She herself loved to be the one who caused that cute blush. “It was luck.”

 “Luck?!” Joy snorted at Harry’s claim. “I’ve never heard of luck that involved a fifteen-meter dive and nearly knocking the opposing seeker off their broom. No, that was all skill.”

 “Not to mention it was in the first fifteen minutes of the match.” Ariel nodded approvingly at Harry. “Incredible.”

 “And let’s not forget about the queen herself.” Joy winked Ginny. “Seventy points in fifteen minutes. Should we start bowing now or wait until later?”

 Ginny laughed. It wasn’t the first time Dan had called her queen. At first, it had been his way of flirting with her, but after denying his advances enough times the context had become nothing more than friendly. “A curtsy whenever I enter a room will suffice.”

 The energy in the room was higher than Ginny had ever experienced. It seemed winning in two hundred and fifty to ten really energized a group. 

 “So we’re still down for that fire tonight, right, Canon?” Joy asked as he pulled off his jersey, throwing it into the team laundry collection.

 Prue clapped her hands together. “Oui! I have everything all set.”

 “All we really need is a high fire and some decent spirits,” Holt came about to slap Harry on the back. “You down for a little drink game, Potter?”

“Errrr…” Harry glanced over at Ginny. She could see the worry in his eyes. It wasn’t hard to figure out what was going through his head. If he got drunk, then he wouldn’t be at top form, which would be a real problem for his protection duty. 

 Protection duty. Ginny still couldn’t believe that Harry had been assigned to guard her. All because her brother had gone to his old buddy, who happened to currently head the Irish Auror department. Not to mention that they suspected that her crazed stalker could be someone within the Bat’s organization. Ginny just couldn’t imagine any of her teammates or staff being that… deranged.  

 That night everything had been… revealed, she and Harry’d had a long discussion. Now that Ginny knew about Harry’s assignment, he was able to bring her up to date with all the intel he had. Well, technically he wasn’t supposed to, which he’d informed her after his recap. If Harry had gone by the books, he should have called an Obliviation squad to alter her memory so she’d have no idea about his actual profession. By not calling the squad he was going rogue, which in turn meant he’d face drastic disciplinary action if his superiors found out about his disregard for the basic undercover rule.  

 She’d had to ask if he was okay with risking the career he’d worked for his entire adult life. It was easier than asking what she was truly wondering: if he'd grow to resent her if something happened. Ginny knew no relationship should hold resentment, and rancor of that caliber would crush both of them in the end. 

 But he’d simply smiled and reached across the small gap between them. He’d pulled her into his side, holding her as if nothing else in the world mattered. The kiss he placed on top of her head seemed to spread down her entire body. “It would one hundred percent be worth it.” 

 Now four days later, just the memory of the affection in his tone expanded a ball of warmth throughout her gut. Well, that and flashback to his demonstration of how he'd spend his days if he didn't have to work anymore.  

 "So, Weasley," Ariel's voice drew Ginny out of her lovely reminiscence. She could feel the heat on her cheeks but hoped it wasn't bad enough for McKidd to notice. "You up for a little drinking competition tonight?”

 “What kind of competition?” Ginny asked warily. McKidd was infamous for contests that would result in everyone involved waking with no recollection of the night before. Typically Ginny was game for such activities, but tonight she’s planned a personal celebration for herself and Harry that she wanted to remember. 

 “Oh, nothing too extreme.” The smile curling Ariel’s lips told Ginny that it was going to be extreme. “Just a gauntlet.”

 Joy and Holt whooped as Ginny’s jaw dropped. “Seriously?” The last time they’d done a gauntlet… well, Ginny hadn’t been able to smell Gillyweed since without feeling sick. “Why?!”

 “Why not!” McKidd laughed like a child opening a present at Christmas. “Last time was fun.”

 “We ended up in muggle prison!”

 Ariel waved off Ginny’s rebuttal “Only for a few hours. Besides, we made friends, didn’t we.”

 Ginny rolled her eyes. “Oh yeah, good Ol’ Mad Dog and Karl.” 

 “Exactly! I still sometimes visit Mad Dog. For a muggle, he’s a wizard at chess.” Ariel winked.

 Ginny was afraid she was rolling her eyes so much that they might get stuck. “Yes because being good at chess makes up for him stealing that, what was it, a kool bus.”

 It was Ariel's turn to roll her eyes. “He said he’d return it but they didn’t let him. But that’s not what we’re talking about here.” She pointed a challenging finger at Ginny “Are you changing the subject because you’re scared, Weasley?”

 Ginny knew she had been caught. She couldn’t turn down a direct challenge like that, not just because every eye in the locker room was on her, but because her Weasley pride wouldn’t allow it. Taking a deep breath, Ginny forced a confident smile. "Not for me. I was simply trying to save you, but if you want to take on the reigning champ I won't stop you." 

 "Damn, Weasley." Joy let out a long, slow whistle. "Them be fightin' words." 

 "And you never fight with an Irish woman and expect to win." McKidd grinned at her as she grabbed a fresh towel from the stand. "Start drinking water now, you're gonna need it." She walked out of the room, her towel swung over her shoulder. 

 Prue smiled at Ginny. "As long as no one vomits in my lilies -" 

 "Hey!" Ginny interrupted. "That was one time!"

 "We will have a good night.” Prue was a few inches taller than Ginny, so she had to lean down to kiss both cheeks. “See you tonight.” Then she was gone from the room. 

 Ginny looked around, most of the team had left too (to most likely shower or grab something to eat). The only remaining people were Joy, herself, and Harry. She walked over to where Harry and Joy talked animatedly.   

 "How do you know so much about the law, Potter?" Joy was asking. 

 Harry's lips curled into an amused smirk. "I just like to know my rights.” 

 “Don’t we all,” Joy laughed. He turned to Ginny once she reached them. “So, Weasley, completing in another gauntlet, huh? You sure you’re up for it? I haven’t seen you at any celebrations recently.” His smirk became too knowing for Ginny’s liking. “It’s like you’ve had something, or maybe someone, better to do.” The way his eyes flickered back and forth between Harry and Ginny. It was as if her heart dropped into her stomach.

 “How did you find out?” she asked, impressed with her ability to keep her voice level while the rest of her felt like she was hanging off the edge of a cliff. Had they been too obvious? Did the others know? What about her stalker? Was Harry now in danger --

 Joy’s laugh cut off her rapid thoughts. “I saw you two snogging outside of the showers after practice a while back.” 

 Ginny’s imagination instantly took her back to that day. Harry had just gotten out from under the spray, a towel loosely tied at his hips. Water had still glistened off him and he had just looked so… good. She hadn’t been able to resist running her hands up into his still-damp hair and kissing him. She’d thought her quick observation of the room had been enough to notice anyone, but apparently her eyes really had only been for Harry if Joy had been able to see them. 

 She looked over at Harry. He was biting his lower lip and she knew his mind was playing out the numerous complications this presented. If Joy said something to the wrong person… 

 Ginny turned back to Dan, hoping she’d twisted her lips into a convincing sheepish smile. “Dan, I mean what do you expect me to say?”

 Joy shrugged, his grin still wide. “I mean I wouldn’t object to some details.” He winked. 

 Preventing her eyes from rolling took more resolve than Ginny thought she had at the moment, but somehow she managed. “How about no.”

 “Can’t blame a bloke for trying.” Joy laughed. “So, how long has it been going on? I mean, I always sensed something between you two, but you seemed rather comfortable from where I had been standing.”

 “A few months now,” Harry spoke for the first time since Joy’s obvious implication. He was paler than usual, but his gaze was focused and alert, as he stared at his friend. The way Harry seemed to be evaluating every part of Joy with just his eyes was intense… and hot. Did they teach him that at the academy? “Joy, would you mind keeping this between us? Ginny and I are - we don’t want any hassle from the rest of the team.”

 Dan blinked once, twice, a third time before nodding slowly. “Yeah, I can do that.”

 That was one thing Ginny had always loved about Joy. Though he could be a bit of a sadist when it came to his jokes, he always seemed to know when to pull back and be serious. Apparently the look in Harry’s eyes showed the severity of his request.  

 “Thank you, Dan.” Harry’s shoulders sagging relief. “We really appreciate that. I know it sounds weird --”

 Joy waved a hand, his usual bright smile in place. “Nah, I get it. If everyone knew… well, the teasing would be relentless.”

 “Yeah, exactly.” Ginny gratefully agreed with the half-truth. There was so much more to their secrecy than just a bit of pestering, but Dan didn’t need to know that. She pulled Joy into a hug. “You’re the best.”

 “And here I thought I was the only one you said that too.” 

 Ginny flinched as she recognized the new voice. She pulled away from Joy, holding back a growl. “Dr. Hogan.” 

 Finn was beaming as he approached them. He seemed to be taking in the group, his eyes flicking between the three of them “No need for such formalities, I mean we all know each other on a personal level.” When his attention landed on Ginny, his scrutiny became more like a leer. “Some better than others.”

 Ginny’s fists clenched. She had to remind herself that hitting a member of staff was completely frowned upon, no matter how much of a prat they were. However, there was no rule about sounding happy to see them. Making sure to keep her expression neutral, Ginny let her disdain out in her tone. “What can we help you with?”

 Finn's smile never wavered, but Ginny noticed the flash of annoyance in his eyes. Good! “I was coming over to congratulate you all on a superb win. And I wanted to check over your shoulder, Ginny. I noticed you were holding it rather stiffly after that fifth goal. It won’t take more than a minute.” 

 Oh, he was good! It was such a legitimate excuse to talk to her… hell, it even was a reason for the two of them to be alone, which Ginny had been trying to avoid as much as possible. If she refused it would make her out to be a problem. 

 To be fair she had felt a little stiff, but she had just intended on taking a hot shower and asking Harry for one of his splendid massages, which tended to help her entire body relax. Gritting her teeth, Ginny took in a deep breath before giving Finn a fake smile. “Sure, I can spare a minute.”

 Joy clapped his hands together. “Well, I’m not needed here anymore.” He took a step towards the door before pausing. “Oh, hey, Doc?”

 Finn tore his eyes off Ginny for the first time since they landed on her. “Yeah?”

 Ginny ignored Dan and Finn’s conversation to focus on Harry. His expression was blank, but Ginny knew that he was feeling more than he could share. Harry wasn’t the kind of bloke who wore his heart on his sleeve for anyone to see. He left very few people in, and Ginny was grateful every day that she was one of the selected. Because she had been granted an insider’s view, Ginny had learned that when looked uncaring and detached (like now), there was so much happening in his head. 

 But right at that moment, Ginny could sense his… ire more than see it. She had to assume it was all directed at Finn. She’d shared her history with Harry before they’d even started dating. He had been outraged on her behalf, claiming he would have held the guy’s arms while she hit him. At the time, he had made Ginny smile. Harry somehow always found a way to make her smile.

 It took a few moments, but eventually Harry seemed to feel her stare. When he finally looked at her, she raised a brow, silently asking what he planned on doing. Harry wrinkled his nose, clearly knowing there wasn’t anything he could do and not liking it one bit. 

 “Ginny?” Finn’s voice pulled her attention away from Harry. 

 “Hmm? Oh, yeah.” She gave a curt nod. “A quick check-up isn’t a bad idea.” 

 “Great!” That bright, lewd smile fell back into place as Finn gestured towards the staff rooms. “My office awaits.” 

 As Ginny started to head in the direction Finn had pointed, an idea struck her. She stopped and turned to look at Harry, who was glaring daggers into Finn’s back. “Hey, Harry. Would you mind grabbing my bag out of my locker and bringing it to the exam room? I have an appointment I can’t be late for and it would be so much easier if I just leave from there.”

 “I don’t know --” Finn started, a frown forming on his face, but Harry cut him off. 

 “It will be my pleasure. I’ll be there in five minutes.” Harry grinned crookedly at Finn, clearly gloating at the other man’s irritation. “Always ready to help.”

 “Perfect.” Ginny beamed at Harry. “See you then.” She turned and started down the corridor, not bothering to check and see if Finn was following. When she reached the exam room, which was combined with Finn’s office, Ginny stopped. 

 Finn had apparently been hot on her heels, seeing as how he was instantly at the door, tapping his wand and opening it wide. He held the door, stepping aside so Ginny could enter. 

 Ginny hadn’t been in the medical room since Atlas had left. In Finn’s short time of being the team’s primary, he’d made the room his own. Gone were Atlas’ posters of calming meadows and streams. Finn had hung portraits of, what Ginny had to assume were, medical professionals.

 “Have a seat.” Finn pointed towards the bed that sat in the corner of the room.

 Ginny shook her head. “I think I’ll stand, thanks. My legs feel fine.” 

 “Why are you --” Finn cut himself off. His chest rose and fell with the deep breaths he took. After a few seconds, he held up his hands in surrender. “All right then. Well, will you at least take off your robe and shirt so I can see at your shoulder?”

 The day Finn had come back into her life, she and Harry had gone back to her place. Harry had instantly pulled her into his arms. He’d run a hand up and down her back, reminding her of his offer. That had pulled her out of her melancholy mood. She’d kissed him for his valiant offer but told him it wasn’t necessary. Harry had kissed the top of her head. They’d stayed like that for a few seconds before Harry told her he was going to do a background check on Finn. She’d pulled back to give him a knowing look, figuring Harry was dealing with a little green-eyed monster, but he had shot that thought down. “It’s weird that he just shows up after you’ve received threats. Who knows, maybe he doesn’t want you but doesn’t think anyone else should have you.”

 For some reason, that moment replayed in her mind as she took off her robe. Harry had told her his dig into Finn’s file hadn’t wielded any devious inclinations, but she still had an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach as she slowly removed the long-sleeved jersey she wore. 

 Finn smiled at her, which she was sure was supposed to be comforting, but all it did was make her want to leave even sooner. She could remember him giving her that smile as they’d walked down the coast, watching the sunset over the English Channel. That had been the day she’d told him she loved him. The day he’d said it back. The day she’d agreed to give herself to him in every way possible. Then two weeks later he dumped her. She hated that smile… that damn smile.

 He moved around her body so he stood behind her. “Can you roll your shoulder for me?”

 Ginny took a deep breath before following his commands. After rolling, she needed to stretch out her arms wide. She could feel his warm fingers sliding along her skin, brushing the strap of the vest she’d worn under her kit. 

 “Now can you reach up high?” Finn asked. “Good.” Again his fingers pushed into her shoulder. “So, Ginny, I’ve been wanting to talk.” 

 “There isn’t anything --” Ginny tried to cut him off, but Finn overrode her.

 “Yes, there is. I need to apologize and you wouldn’t let me do it before.” She looked over her shoulder at his face. He had a self-deprecating look in his eyes. “I treated you like shit.”

 Ginny turned around so she could see all of him. His hand had gone to rub the back of his neck. He cleared his throat before continuing. “I was a scared seventeen-year-old who didn’t know what I really wanted in life. When you started getting --” He waved his hands in an uncommitted gesture. “I panicked and said things that weren’t true. Then even worse, I ran. I know I hurt you and I just wanted - no needed -- for you to know I’m sorry.”

 She hadn’t thought she would ever hear this come out of Finn’s mouth, and Ginny had reached peace with that. But now… It took a few moments to close her mouth, which had gone wide during his explanation. “I --” Now it was her turn to clear her throat. “Thank you for saying all that.” 

 “I mean it.” Finn pressed, his expression imploring. “I hate that I hurt you.” 

 And Ginny believed him. When she looked into his eyes, she saw only the truth staring back at her. She nodded, not knowing what to say. 

 They remained silent for a few seconds before Finn let out a long breath. “Thank you, Ginny.” He pointed at her shoulder. “Should be fine, but you should ice it tonight.”

 “Okay.” Ginny still had no idea what she should say. Instead of speaking, she grabbed her robe and pulled it back on, forgoing the dirty jersey that lay beside it.

 “Now that we’ve got that settled, I know you have plans tonight, but I was wondering if you were free for dinner sometime this week.” Finn’s smile became suggestive. 

 And just like that Ginny’s warm feeling toward this man left. “Really?” 

 He shrugged that smile widening. “I’m older and wiser than I was all those years ago. And wiser me knows I couldn’t do better than you. I was hoping after I admitted my faults that you might give me a second chance.” 

 Was it appropriate for her to tell him she’d rather date a one-eyed troll?  

 “I don’t think so, Finn.” 

 “Why not?” Finn moved in closer. Ginny could now smell his cologne (a simple fresh fragrance that was nothing compared to Harry’s natural scent). “We had some good times, back before everything happened.”  

 Ginny’s hands clenched into fists, ready to hit him if he tried anything. “Because I don’t have a self-loathing kink to try and satisfy.” 

 Finn leered down at her. “It’s not a bad thing to get back with someone who made a mistake. I can make you happy, Ginny.”

 Ginny took a step back, trying to get some space between them. “I’m not interested, Finn. Actually, I’m seeing someone.”

 The snort Finn let out held no laughter. “So dump him.” He moved to close the gap between them again, but Ginny placed a hand out to stop him. “There is no way he can make you feel the way I used to make you feel. We used to be so free.”

 That was enough! She was about to tell Finn off, calling him every name in the book, when a knock on the door echoed around the room before Finn could respond. Harry came in without being granted access, her pack slung over his shoulder. He looked between the two of them, his body tensing. “Everything okay here?”

 Finn stepped back quickly, that leering look being replaced by a friendly smile. “We’re perfect. Just discussing some possibilities.”

 Ginny scooped her jersey from the floor and left the room, grabbing Harry’s hand as she left. She was going to go report Finn Hogan to Coach Kennedy and then got the fuck out of here. As she walked through the doorway Finn shouted words that wouldn’t connect to her mind until much later that night. “I look forward to seeing you at the party tonight.”

 Harry stopped her when they were a good distance from the exam room. He grabbed her shoulders lightly, looking her in the eye. “What happened?”

 “I learned Finn’s still a prick, that’s what happened.” Ginny took a deep breath as Harry just continued to stare at her. She started to explain everything. When she finished Harry's expression was so murderous Ginny thought he might be able to kill with just one look.  

 “I’m going to go --” Harry started, his voice low, but Ginny cut him off.

 “You are going to go with me and complain to Coach Kennedy and then we are going back to your place.”

 Harry blinked at her in confusion “Back to my place?”

 “Yeah, back to yours where we are going to work off this anger in a carnal fashion.” She knew she must sound mental, but she knew what she needed at that moment was him. She needed Harry. “Any problem with that, Potter?”

 “I --” Harry opened and closed his mouth twice in rapid succession before shaking his head. “Whatever you need.”

 Ginny went up on his toes and kissed him hard. “Good answer.” She murmured against his mouth. Then she lowered herself back onto her heels and started walking at a fast pace. “Now let’s move, because I have many plans for you before we have to go to that party tonight.”

[nellied-reviews]

The Sound and the Fury Re-listen

Well, I've reached episode 7 in my Wolf 359 re-listen, which means it's time for:

The Sound and the Fury

In which Hera and Minkowski are fighting, Eiffel gets caught in the middle, and Hilbert just wants them all to submit to the biologically superior will of the Blessed Eternal.

Straight up, I should probably admit that I forgot about this episode, or rather I didn't link the episode title to the episode's events until I was listening to it. And then I was like "oh, yeah, this is that episode" all the way through. For whatever reason, I thought, in particular, that the plant monster didn't come back until Season 2, with The Paranoia Game. That said, I love the plant monster to a possibly unreasonable degree, so its return here was more than welcome, and the rest of the episode was also fun!

We open in the middle of an argument - and for once, it's not Eiffel's fault. In fact, Eiffel isn't even involved, except insofar as he's trapped in the middle between Hera and Minkowski, and is forced to be the voice of reason as the two of them have it out. 

And look, that is always going to be a funny set-up. Hera and Minkowski are both incredibly stubborn personalities, and not at all shy about asserting their opinions, so there's definitely potential for a comically drawn-out, petty argument there. And casting Eiffel as the reasonable, level-headed peacekeeper, in contrast to the two of them, is perfect. It's in character - Eiffel always has been the most pacifist crew member - but it's also a role he's just totally unsuited to, because faced with the combined stubbornness of Hera and Minkowski, he's outmatched, and he knows it.

In an effort not to get involved, then, Eiffel briefly runs through the week's schedule, in a section that isn't really linked to the rest of the episode, but is full of little oddities that remind us just how weird the Hephaestus is. They have a compulsory chess tournament that Hilbert always wins. They have movie night, but only a VHS of Home Alone 2. "On Friday we'll have mustard." It's so weird, and I love it.

We're interrupted, at this point, by Hilbert, who sounds very strange, even for him. And naturally, Eiffel ignores it completely at first, focussed as he is on the unfolding Hera-Minkowski conflict. I've said it before, but I'll say it again, for such a pop culture-savvy guy, Eiffel falls into literally every horror movie cliché. He's so oblivious!

For the rest of us, it's obvious that something's wrong, and our suspicions are confirmed when we learn over the course of his conversation with Eiffel that Hilbert went looking for the plant monster, which now seems to be mind-controlling him, to the point where he's convinced that it's "the most evolutionarily competitive lifeform on this station, the most deserving of life."

And okay, I love the plant monster, but that's very alarming, and is made even more so by the fact that it's something that Hilbert might conceivably have said anyway? I mean, it's cold and Darwinistic and smacks of eugenics, yes, but it also has a callous ruthlessness to it that's totally Hilbert's style, as well as that trademark lack of concern for human life. It's like the plant monster just exaggerated what was already there, turned the mad scientist dial up to eleven. In other words, it made Hilbert even more Hilbert-y.

Luckily, Eiffel realises soon enough that something's wrong, and goes to warn Minkowski. Minkowski, being a mature, rational individual, immediately drops her argument with Hera and goes to - oh, wait, no, she does basically the opposite of that, ignoring Eiffel in favour of continuing her argument with Hera. Great. Good job, Commander.

It's at this point, of course, that we finally learn exactly what Minkowski and Hera are arguing about. And is it petty. Turns out, Minkowski wants Hera to submit reports on the various systems she runs around the station in case there's an emergency, but also just because Minkowski wants to know what's going on behind the scenes. We don't get to hear Hera's side of things just yet, but already, we can see the irony in Minkowski's arguments. Sure, she wants to be better appraised of everything going on onboard the Hephaestus in case of an emergency - but her stubbornness here means she's missing the emergency that's unfolding right under her nose!

Eiffel's attempts to make her see sense don't really help either, at this juncture. Instead, they just get him dragged into Minkowski and Hera's argument. Which I'm sure is that last thing he wants, because those two play dirty. First Minkowski pressures him into saying, to Hera's face, that he doesn't think AIs should be trusted. And then Hera, angry, plays Eiffel's words from earlier back to Minkowski, twisting what he said around so that both parties are angry at him. As a result, Eiffel ends up walking an impossibly thin line, trying to appease both of his friends, while keeping himself out of their argument as best he can and while getting increasingly frustrated with the both of them. It's a painfully awkward situation, and I genuinely feel sorry for him.

That said, the argument that then plays out is fascinating to me, because I think it shines a really interesting light on the power dynamics onboard the Hephaestus, putting the focus on Hera and Minkowski's relationship in a way that we haven't really seen before. Up until now, after all, they seem to have worked in tandem pretty well, with Minkowski giving orders and Hera carrying them out. Here, for the first time, we see a tension between them, stemming from the fact that Minkowski, as the commanding officer, nominally has the most power onboard the Hephaestus, while Hera, as the ship's AI, probably actually has the most power, between her vast sensory array, her huge databanks, and her literally running the entire Hephaestus. Yes, Minkowski is technically in charge, purely by virtue of her being a human. But Hera, on a day-to-day basis, is actually more crucial to their ongoing mission - even though, as an AI, she doesn't get to hold an official ranking position.

That's possibly why Hera takes Eiffel's well-meaning dismissal ("It's just her programming") so personally. It's a reminder of her different, subordinate status, and it reeks of a double standard - she's right that nobody would think to blame a human's erratic behaviours on their biology. That would be patronising, right? As much as Eiffel means well, writing Hera's reactions off as mere programming strips her of her agency - something that comes up again and again in her character arc. How much is Hera responsible for her actions, if she can also be programmed to act a certain way? In what ways has she been "made" a certain way, against her will? And how can she best deal with that while still retaining a sense of agency and control over her life and identity?  They're big, complicated questions, and we're only really scratching the surface here, but I do think it's a solid foundation for later developments. At the very least, we get the impression that Hera doesn't like to be reduced to her programming - and rightly so, I suspect. To some extent, at least, she is more than just the code that she is made of, just like humans are more than the sum of their biology. And that's a good thing to be establishing now, buried in the middle of a relatively low-stakes argument, before the more plotty stuff kicks off later on in the show.

And of course, it also bleeds into Hera and Minkowski's argument, which really picks up steam at this point, after an impassioned but ultimately futile speech from Eiffel about how it's a stupid fight to begin with and how making him pick sides is dumb and unfair. Hera, ignoring this, accuses Minkowski of feeling threatened by the big, powerful AI. That, for Hera, is why Minkowski is micromanaging her. It's because she's a typical human, insecure about an AI having more power than her.

Hera's point is almost immediately complicated by Minkowski, who rightly points out that the issue, for her, isn't that Hera's an AI. It's that Hera' unreliable. She keeps breaking down and glitching, and so the crew keep experiencing emergencies that could maybe be avoided if Hera would just give Minkowski the reports she wants. We've seen Hera break down as recently as last episode, and so this does kind of ring true, even if the way that Minkowski brings up Hera' vocal glitching feels like a bit of a low blow.

Both of them, then, have a point, and I think it's also worth noting that it's also, as Minkowski points out to Eiffel, a question of protocol. Whether Hera likes it or not, Minkowski is, technically, her commanding officer, and should be able to just give her commands and demand reports from her. Refusing to do so undermines Minkowski's authority. That said, Hera didn't exactly have a choice when it came to joining whatever weird sort-of military thing Goddard has going on. She never signed up for the whole "commanding officer" thing, so why should she obey Minkowski? Because she's programmed to?

It's messy, grey situation, with no clear answers, and it's worth noting that the argument doesn't really get resolved. Neither Minkowski nor Hera back down at any point. Instead, a combination of Eiffel calling them out for being childish and Hilbert attempting a coup snaps them out of it, reminding them that they have bigger problems right now. There is a time and a place for the discussion they were having. But that time is not now, and so they decide, without really discussing it, to set aside their grievances. It's not that their respective opinions aren't valid. But keeping each other (and the rest of the crew) safe comes first, and so they bond over being annoyed at Eiffel, and they set off to save Hilbert. It's sweet, in a way, and I like how quickly they both just get on with it. And Eiffel's dejected resignation at the end is the cherry on top. Bless him.

And so we get to the end of an episode that, while it's reliably funny, also gives us an outline of the main points in an argument that we probably should have seen coming. It's yet another example of how stress and tension can easily build up in the contained, isolated atmosphere of the Hephaestus - only this time, we don't get Eiffel cracking and hoarding toothpaste, we get Hera and Minkowski cracking and unleashing the titular sound and fury. The points raised get us thinking, in particular, about Hera's status, as an AI, but also just as a member of the Hephaestus' crew. Eiffel, meanwhile, is forced into a responsible, mediating role that he is neither comfortable in nor particularly good at. And at the end of the day, we're reassured that Minkowski and Hera do, at least, have their priorities straight. Arguing over reports is fine and dandy, but it's not worth getting killed over.

And of course, perhaps most excitingly, the plant monster returns. Surrender your flesh, and feed your new master :)

 Miscellaneous thoughts:

It doesn't escape my attention that this is the second title that's a Shakespeare reference. Keeping it classy there, Doug

"Umm... that's all it says for Friday."

The schedule bit is basically the Night Vale Community Calendar segment, but in space

Hilbert's voice in this is sooo weird and dull and creepy ugh

I know the science of it isn't really the focus here, and I'm 100% down with that, but also how does a plant mind control people?!? I want to know!

"Our operating system is a tin-headed, insubordinate, feckless fool!"

"Sit your Swiss ass down, and take a side, Doug."

Aww, Eiffel just sounds so confused and stressed-out by the whole situation :(

And finally we get the obvious Little Shop of Horrors plant monster joke :)

I didn't go into much detail about Eiffel in this, but his speech where he finally gets them to shut up and work together again is also great and I love it jsyk

"Shut up, Plant-Hilbert." Bwahahahaha.

[master-thief-gray-shadow]

A Real Life Coffee Shop Romance

Chapter 5

First chapter | Previous chapter

Summary: Tsugumi was content to live with her mistake. But Afterglow would never settle for anything that would upset their beloved keyboardist.

Notes: And with that, we are done! I actually finished a multichap fic! Incredible! Thanks to everyone who read this, I really really appreciate the support!

She’d been awake for a couple hours now, probably. Not that it made a difference. Awake or not, she didn’t really want to leave her bed. Fortunately she had that luxury today. It was a Saturday, and since her mother had been the one to find her in the cafe storage room practically lying in a puddle of her own tears last night she’d been more or less excused from her responsibilities for now. This was fine. She was tired. She could do without seeing anyone today. Her eyelids were getting heavy again, so she figured she might as well go back to sleep.

“Tsugu!” A familiar loud voice, followed by an equally loud series of quick, violent knocks on her bedroom door, jolted her awake. “Tsugu! You awake?”

“She is now,” A quieter, sleepier voice drawled.

“Tomoe, no!” Pleaded a high-pitched, girlish voice. “You’re going to break her door down if you do that!”

A long, drawn out sigh could be heard.

Tsugumi sat up, rubbing her eyes as she turned toward the door. “Guys…?”

The door opened (remaining on its hinges, thankfully) and Himari immediately barreled into the room, followed closely by the rest of Afterglow. “Tsuguuuuu!” She threw her arms around Tsugumi’s shoulders, nearly knocking her over with a surprised yelp. As she steadied herself Tsugumi noticed that Himari’s eyes were swimming with tears. “Come on, Tsugu, please tell us what’s wrong!”

“You were acting strange last night,” Ran said, the worry in her voice subtle enough that the other four people in the room were probably the only ones in the world who could sense it. “You insisted you were fine, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.” She took a few steps forward, until she was hovering above Tsugumi. “Tsugumi, I can’t put into words how important you are to Afterglow. If something is wrong, then please let us know.”

Tsugumi looked up at Ran, even as Himari wrapped herself tighter around her, before her gaze fell downward again. “I’m sorry. It’s something silly, nothing you need to worry about.” Well, no, it was a little too heavy to be called “silly,” but it certainly wasn’t something to burden her friends with either.

“Yeah it is,” Tomoe said in the softest, tenderest voice she could muster. Which, given that this was Tomoe, still only barely qualified as an “indoor voice.” “Your problems are our problems, and we’re gonna do whatever we can to help.”

In spite of her lingering sadness, Tsugumi couldn’t help but let out a small, genuine laugh. Maybe she wasn’t very lucky when it came to love, but she was nothing short of blessed to have such wonderful and caring friends. “I’m grateful, but I don’t think there’s anything you could do anyway.”

“I mean, you don’t know that,” Moca said from where she leaned on the doorframe. “Who knows, maybe the key to your woes is somewhere in Himari’s bag.”

“What? Why my bag?”

As the situation escalated Tsugumi went silent. Obviously it was unlikely that any actual, physical key could resolve anything, and she questioned whether there was any kind of metaphorical key either, but...well…

Her attention turned back to the scene in front of her, where Tomoe had apparently lifted Moca up by her shoulders and was holding her aloft. Telling them would at least get some things off her chest, as well as put a stop to...whatever was going on here.

“Um! So…” She first made sure to get their attention. It worked. Tomoe slowly lowered Moca as everyone turned to look at her. Tsugumi took a deep breath to steady herself before continuing. “So there’s...there’s this customer that’s been coming into the cafe in the afternoons, when everyone else is gone. And she’s a high schooler, she comes in after school. She’s been doing this for a few months now, a-and we’ve gotten really close. This has been like a thing for us, where we talk and hang out all the time, and I really like spending time with her, she’s really pretty and sweet, but…” She sniffed. Just thinking about how Sayo had come to the cafe expecting to see her, only to leave in disappointment...everything was all coming up again. “I missed her last night...and I think...I think she’s mad at me…” Tears once again burned her cheeks as they rolled down.

“Oh jeez...Sorry Tsugu,” Tomoe said as she sat down on the bed and pulled Tsugumi into a tight yet comforting hug. She found herself relaxing into Tomoe’s arms as she cried into her shoulder.

“I’m sure she’s not mad,” Himari gently cooed as she stroked Tsugumi’s hair. “Maybe if you just talk to her things will work out.”

“Wait,” Moca chimed in, “you said you didn’t get crushes on your patrons.”

There was a long, pregnant moment of silence as Moca’s words registered in everyone’s mind. Followed by Ran groaning and facepalming. Which was then followed by Himari squealing excitedly.

“OH MY GOSH YOU HAVE A CRUSH! ON A CUSTOMER!” Hearts were practically flying out of her eyes as she clutched at her chest, enraptured at having encountered something she previously only read about. Almost as soon as it had fallen over her the awestruck look faded, replaced by fiery determination. “Okay! Now you definitely have to talk to her!”

“Oh yeah, totally!” Tomoe had now pulled Tsugumi out of her embrace and was now beaming down at her. She didn’t seem to be bothered by the odd look that was a result of having both tear stains and a heavy blush on her face. “Who is it? We gotta know so we can find them!”

“Ah...um…” This morning had been such an emotional roller coaster that Tsugumi was having a little trouble trying to get her thoughts in line.

“Is it Kaoru-senpai?” Himari leaned in very close, looking as though she were ready to determine the answer by reading Tsugumi’s mind directly instead of just waiting for her to respond. “It’s not Kaoru-senpai, is it?”

“N-no, it’s not her,” She said, finally managing to put together a coherent sentence. Himari backed off a little, a small amount of her previous intensity evaporating away. But only a small amount, she still almost looked like she was ready for an interrogation. “It’s...um...it’s…” She took a few deep breaths, before making direct eye contact with Ran. “It’s...it’s Hikawa Sayo…”

“Whoa, wait, really?”

“What? You and Sayo-san? But she’s so...so…”

“Ooh, sounds like a scandal, huh Ran?”

Now that Moca had brought it up, everyone else’s eyes shifted to Ran as well. This was one thing Tsugumi had realized might be a problem, albeit perhaps irrationally. Ran had come a long way in her relationship with Yukina, and hostility had long since given way to the mutual respect of a healthy rivalry, but there was still an anxious knot tying itself in her stomach.

Ran closed her eyes and exhaled slowly. “You know how I feel about Minato-san and her band,” She said, before opening her eyes again and looking straight into Tsugumi’s. “But your happiness is important to me too. If being with Sayo-san is the thing that makes you happy, I won’t get in your way.”

“Ran-chan…” Jeez, now she even had Ran’s blessing. The tears in her eyes started welling up again. If only she’d realized her feelings sooner, then she would have been able to move forward with Sayo, but now…

“Tsugu!” The sudden volume of Himari’s voice forced Tsugumi to snap to attention. “Now you absolutely have to talk to her! You have her number, right?”

“Um…” And now, on top of the tears, there was nervous sweat forming on her face. “I...I never exchanged numbers with her, actually…”

“Whaaaaaat? What do you mean you didn’t exchange numbers?” Himari seemed oddly shocked for something that seemed to make perfect sense, at least to Tsugumi. “How are we going to get in touch with her now?”

“I don’t think it’s normal for baristas to swap numbers with their customers,” said Ran, who thankfully seemed to be on the same page.

“Tsugu may not have Sayo-san’s number,” Moca said, reaching into her pocket, “but I have Lisa-san’s.” She pulled out her phone and held it up, a text log between her and Lisa on the screen. “Playing matchmaker for you two shouldn’t be a problem.”

“Oh no, you don’t have to do that,” Tsugumi said, mildly panicking. She appreciated the gesture, of course, but this situation was much too delicate for Afterglow as a whole to handle. “I’ll figure things out on my own, it’ll be--”

“Too late,” Moca said with a smirk as she hit “send.” “Relax, Tsugu. I don’t have a plan, but I’m sure we can all come up with something.”

As the others chimed in with ideas, Tsugumi remained silent, thinking only about how Moca’s words were probably the least reassuring things she could have heard in this situation.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had been a day since the rest of Afterglow had put into motion some kind of plan to set her up with Sayo, and so far nothing had come of it. Tsugumi had decided that this was fine, actually. She’d missed her chance, and she would live with it. Perhaps even take some lessons to heart. It was impossible that Sayo returned her feelings anyway. Sayo was beautiful and talented and commanded respect from others, and she was just some barista who happened to be in a band with her friends. There was no comparison between them. It would never work.

The warm, sweet scent of chocolate wafted through the kitchen as Tsugumi took a loaf of pound cake out of the oven and set it aside. It had been a little while since she’d made this recipe, and she wasn’t as confident that she made it as good as her mother did, but she’d been in the mood for it. Nothing mended a broken heart quite like chocolate could, and for this particular broken heart the addition of coffee into the cake made it all the more potent. She closed her eyes and inhaled, letting the scent fill her lungs. It was soothing her already.

The sound of the bell over the door reached her ears. That was odd, the cafe wasn’t supposed to officially open for another half hour or so. Maybe she’d forgotten to lock the door while things were being set up? She did sometimes forget to do that. But usually customers would see the “closed” sign and not even notice that the door was open, much less try to come in. Sighing, she reluctantly left the kitchen to deal with the early bird.

“I’m sorry, but we’re--” She stopped dead in her tracks the moment she saw who had walked in. “Sayo-san?”

In front of the door, looking just as nervous and confused as Tsugumi felt, was Hikawa Sayo.

“Um...Good morning, Tsugumi-san,” She said, her eyes aimed at the floor off to the side somewhere. “I really don’t mean to be a pest. I’m not actually here of my own volition.”

“Not of your own volition…” Tsugumi repeated. “What do you mean?” Oh no, was this the Plan that had been discussed earlier?

“Well, I was told you wanted to talk to me,” Sayo said, fidgeting with one of the buttons on her coat. “I was planning to wait until tomorrow at our usual time, but the others were…” She looked at the windows behind her, seeming even more confused, “...very...insistent…”

Tsugumi was about to ask why she was looking at the windows, and who, exactly, she meant by “the others” when Sayo’s words registered fully in her mind. “Wait,” She said softly, “Our usual time?”

“Of course,” Sayo said, finally stepping somewhat closer. “It’s especially important since I missed you on Friday.”

Tsugumi’s eyes widened as more tears started to fill them. This time, however, they were not tears of sorrow, but tears of relief. “You mean...you aren’t mad at me?”

Sayo smiled, that warm, gentle smile that left Tsugumi with a floaty feeling in her chest. “Why would I be mad?” She came even closer, close enough for Tsugumi to see the smile in those deep jade eyes as well. “I can’t assume you forgot to tell me Afterglow was playing that night out of malice. I’ll admit I was a little heartbroken at first, but it was inspiring to see you play. Although something was off about your performance, you seemed like you weren’t giving it your fullest.”

“Wait, what?” Tsugumi almost yelled from the shock. “You were at Galaxy?”

“I came as soon as I heard and managed to catch the last few minutes of your set,” Sayo said, still smiling. “I must admit your band is good, even though you were not at your best.” A light blush rose in her cheeks. “In truth I was simply satisfied just to see you.”

“S-Sayo-san…” Her heart was pounding, but it wasn’t the agonizing, painful pounding that she remembered from two nights ago. It was that vigorous, energetic feeling that made her feel like she could rise above the clouds. Sayo had come to see her...Sayo had come all the way from the cafe to the live house just to see her. “Sayo-san, I...there was a reason my playing was off.”

A worried look came over Sayo. “Tsugumi-san, if anything is ever wrong, don’t hesitate to share it with me.” Sayo was actually concerned for her well-being…

If she didn’t shoot her shot now, she was, in this moment, a fool. Perhaps she had been a fool in the past, and she had no doubt she would be a fool in the future, but right now, Hazawa Tsugumi would be anything but a fool.

“It’s because…” She took a series of long, deep breaths, hoping the oxygen intake would keep her from shaking too hard. “It’s because I was overwhelmed… because I had just realized that…” She closed her eyes tightly and lowered her head, not feeling quite brave enough to look Sayo in the eye when she would say her next words. “...that I like you! A lot! I like you a lot!”

Silence. Silence that could be cut with a knife. Tsugumi almost swore she could even hear Sayo’s rapid heartbeat, even over the roar of her own.

“Tsugumi-san…” Sayo’s voice was quiet, almost a whisper. “I...I never imagined I would be able to say this, but…” She nervously cleared her throat. Tsugumi slowly opened her eyes and raised her head, and immediately noticed the deep red blush on Sayo’s face, deeper than anything she had ever seen before. “I...return your feelings, Tsugumi-san.”

She had died, hadn’t she? This wasn’t real. This couldn’t be real. There was no way that the flushed, demure expression on Sayo’s face was real, that the glittering joy in her eyes was real, that the blazing, swirling, uncontrollable wave of sheer elation travelling through every inch of her body was real.

“Sayo-san…” She could feel herself crying again. Tears of joy. “Sayo-san!” She threw herself forward, catching Sayo by surprise as she wrapped her arms around her in a tight embrace. Her heart fluttered as she felt Sayo’s arms around her as well. “You’re so pretty and so amazing and so cool, and I’m just...I’m just some girl!” She mumbled into Sayo’s shoulder as she cried. “I can’t even believe you like me back!”

Sayo separated them slightly, but only just enough to allow her to caress Tsugumi’s cheek with her hand. “Why not?” She said, the warmth in her eyes going straight to Tsugumi’s heart. “You’re kind, you’re passionate, you’re knowledgeable...how could I not have feelings for you?”

“Sayo-san…”

For the second time today, Tsugumi opted to do something brave. Forcing down her feelings of nervousness, she closed her eyes and leaned forward, pausing the moment she felt Sayo’s lips against her own.

The second Sayo kissed her back Tsugumi’s mind went momentarily blank. Her lips were so soft, and she was being so gentle and cautious, and in this moment Tsugumi felt so happy that she was starting to worry she might pass out. The kiss was short, but the feeling on her lips lingered as they pulled apart.

“Sayo-san, that was--”

The sound of the bell over the door was heard. Followed by a pair of voices yelping in surprise, and then by the sound of a pair of bodies hitting the floor.

“Himari?” Tsugumi said, bewildered.

“Hina…” Sayo said through her teeth.

“Congrats on the girlfriend, Onee-chan!” Hina chirped from where she lay on the floor.

“Oh my gooooooooosh!” Himari, at least, had the sense to stand up. “That was a picture-perfect confession, straight out of a shoujo manga!” She rubbed at her eyes and sniffled. “I...I think I might cry…”

“Now, come on you two,” chided a voice that Tsugumi recognized even before she came into view. “Give the lovebirds some space.”

“Lisa-senpai?” She said as she watched Lisa pull Hina up off of the floor. “What are you doing here?”

Lisa beamed at them, practically glowing with pride. “When Moca told me Sayo needed a little push, how could I say no? Especially when she’s going for such a sweet girl like yourself.” The last comment made Tsugumi’s cheeks flush red once again.

“I knew it!” Hina pumped her fist, seemingly the only reason she hadn’t tackled the new couple in a congratulatory hug being that Lisa was still restraining her by one arm. “I knew this was why you were always going to the cafe!”

Still smiling, Lisa grabbed onto a sobbing Himari’s arm as well. “Sorry about the interruption, these girls just got too excited and ran off,” She said as she started to lead the other two out the door. “I’ll take them back over to Yamabuki, that’s where the rest of your band’s hanging out, Tsugumi.” Hina and Himari were out of the shop by now, and she was barely in the doorway, but she took a moment to look back, that bright, proud smile still on her face. “Oh, and again on the congrats! Best of luck, you two!”

And moments later, they were alone again. They both spent a long time silently staring at the door, trying to process what on Earth had just happened, until Tsugumi finally spoke up.

“So…” She said quietly, “do you want anything to drink?”

Sayo was quiet for a moment, before that gentle smile spread across her face. “That sounds nice. A mocha, perhaps?”

“Sure, of course.” Tsugumi smiled back. She was kind of in the mood for one herself. She would make two, she decided. “Oh, and I just took this cake out of the oven before you came in, so it should be cool now.” She found herself blushing, her heart still beating much too fast. “It’s a chocolate pound cake, and it has coffee grounds in it for extra flavor. Would you like to try it?”

Sayo’s smile seemed to glow, subtle yet radiant like the soft light of the moon, and it made Tsugumi wonder why she couldn’t have realized these feelings of love soon enough.

“Yes, I’d love to.”

[malarkiness]

Finished Nier Automata, and I have many.... many thoughts.

I just want to start by saying that this game is aggressively bleak once you hit Routes C/D. Endings A/B are really the last bright spots in the story, and then it's just tragedy after tragedy from that point forward, and the worst part of it is that none of these tragedies result in anything good or even decent or even narratively satisfying. They just happen, and you're left thinking "wow, that fucking sucks" before you shake it off and proceed with the game.

Despite that, I kept playing because I thought all these tragedies would eventually result in something that would've made the characters' suffering worth it because that's just how a good story works, right? But that never really happens (at least, not within the context of the story itself), so when I finally got to Endings C/D, I honestly felt like I'd spent ~27 hours playing a game just to watch the leads die terrible deaths. It just felt really hollow and pointless.

But then I got Ending E, and that kind of changed my entire way of looking at this game.

So this ending shows the PODs deciding to try salvaging the androids' data rather than deleting it all as ordered. The game warns you that saving the data is risky and unlikely to work, then says "Knowing that, do you still wish for them to survive?" Choosing yes turns the credits scroll into a hacking minigame that is UNFORGIVABLY!!!!! difficult, but each game over screen reels you back in with something like "IS IT ALL POINTLESS?"/"DO YOU WANT TO GIVE UP?"/etc.

Now if you're connected to PSN, you'll also get little encouraging messages from players all over the world on each game over screen, but I wasn't connected for my first playthrough lmfao, so I just suffered through it for like 20 minutes and was starting to think the whole thing was deliberately impossible just to give the player one last kick in the teeth and show that yes, it really was pointless and that they're wasting their time trying to fix something that can't be changed. With the way this game's storyline played out, that really wouldn't have surprised me.

But then I restarted the segment and connected to """The Network""" when prompted, then died a few more times before getting a screen asking me if I'd like help. And I really wish I'd screencapped that prompt because that was when I started noticing all the little messages that other players left. There was one from someone in China that really got to me for some reason, and I can't even remember what it was lol, but it made me tear up. Once you restart after that, a bunch of other players' cursors will join in the fight to help you and the solo singer turns into a chorus, and I just.

😭

Every time you lose a player, though, you're told that "[name]'s data has been lost," which I thought was kind of sad, but it wasn't until I finally beat that segment that I realized what they all had actually done. After the credits wrap up, you learn that all the players who helped you finish the game gave up their save data to do it, and then you're asked if you'd like to do the same to help someone else. And while I've since learned that all this actually does is let you leave an encouraging message for other players and have your username show up during the ending sequence for someone else (sort of like an arcade game's scoreboard), the game presents it as an opportunity to really help other players finish the story, so of course I said yes. It wasn't a hard decision at all, and making that choice after playing through the credits was easily the most rewarding part of the entire game, or really any game I've ever played.

And I know I've spent like... 75% of this post talking about a credits sequence lmfao, but that really did change how I look at this game. When you finish the storyline with Endings C/D, the answer to this game's whole thematic question of "What's the point of living?" seems to be "There ain't one, chief." But finishing with Ending E, the answer leans more toward "The point is hoping for and working toward something better because you believe it's there." Add in the fact that you're given the option to "sacrifice" yourself to help someone else continue, and that the game makes this such a painless decision despite what an actual pain in the ass it is for you as a Gamer™, and it actually makes for a more satisfying ending than the in-story ending.

SE could've just had that one sequel-hook scene play at the end of the credits without the minigame at all, or just gone the typical RPG route and made that scene unlockable if you got 100% or whatever. But instead, they took this really creative meta approach that not only pushes you to do a task that's seemingly impossible, but also asks you to sacrifice something you've worked hard for just to help someone else get through that same task. And the fact that so many other players made that choice is just really sweet and honestly kind of touching. Like I'm sure plenty of people just got around it by saving their data on a usb lmao, but still. It's a nice thought. And for the record, my username is Larkey, and my message was "I bet you're having a tough time right now. But we've got this!"

Anyway! Other things about this game:

2B's history of killing 9S over and over or A2's backstory with Anemone and the YoRHa troops definitely should've been given actual screentime, and not just stated in the last 2 minutes of the story or shoved into some optional text. Watching 9S's grief-turned-madness was fascinating, sure, but 2B and A2 deserved just as much focus on their grief (which would've been way more interesting, just for the record. 2B purposefully distancing herself emotionally from someone she has to repeatedly kill, and A2 feeling betrayed by her own creators after watching her friends die needlessly, are storylines that would likely have a lot more emotional weight than "angry teenage boy goes on murder spree before finally getting his revenge only to fall on his opponent's sword and die like a dumbass." I know the Nier franchise has approximately 93 trillion pieces of supplemental material that fill in the gaps from the games, so it's possible that some of those cover 2B and A2 more, but come on. These characters are just as important to the story as 9S; They should've gotten actual in-game screentime devoted to contemplating their existences/grief/etc.

I talked about how bleak this game's storyline is, but the real kicker for me was the scene where all the children in Pascal's village commit suicide. That just seemed so needlessly cruel, and the fact that it happens (depending on how you play) maybe an hour after A2's shown to have warmed up a bit towards the machines is just... cheap? It really did feel like emotional string-pulling just for the sake of it, like the kind of silly edgelord shit I wrote when I was 14. It's so over-the-top that I almost couldn't take it seriously. And if all that wasn't 3edgy5me enough, Pascal then asks you to either wipe his memory or kill him because he can't live with the heartbreak. Fuck's sake. I think what really annoys me about this whole scene is that... This game introduces us to A2 by having her kill a defenseless baby machine, right? So you'd think there'd be some kind of reflection from her after Pascal loses all the children in his village. She fought an insane battle to protect them, too, and she's clearly horrified when she finds out what happens to them, but... that's kind of it. This incident is never brought up again, despite the huge impact it should have on her character. The only thing this scene really does for the narrative, I think, is set up a parallel between Pascal and YoRHa troops like 2B and 9S. And in that way, it does fit into game's overall theme of finding meaning for your life, especially after you've lost what you were living for in the first place (so Pascal's community, and YoRHa's "god worth dying for"). But like I said, the game never really seems to resolve that thematic question within the context of the story itself. And even if that parallel was the point, you could've accomplished it by just having everyone in the village die during the cannibal machine attack and Pascal + A2 failing to save them, no baby suicide needed. I dunno, I've gone back and forth on how I feel about this scene, but honestly, more than anything, it just comes off as a try-hard, eyeroll-worthy way for this game to earn its M-rating. And the fact that A2 gets 0 character development out of it just makes it seem lazy.

Characterwise, I'd definitely say A2 is my favorite. Her ending on the C/D routes was probably the most satisfying just because she essentially gets the only thing she's really wanted ever since she lost her friends, and I thought her unusual relationship with 2B was interesting (and again, deserved more screentime). 2B's also great, especially on the second playthrough when you know why she purposefully tries to get 9S to shut up anytime he innocently wonders something out loud. And I like 9S too just because he's so endearing in Routes A/B, making his stark personality shift in C/D that much more jarring. I'm a little annoyed that he never finds out why A2 killed 2B, though by the end of C/D, he's probably too far gone to actually take that in. I liked most of the NPCs, too. Anemone and Jackass are my favs, but 6O and 21O have some good moments, too. And while a lot of the female YoRHa designs are just... embarrassingly male, there are some really creative character/boss designs here and there. Simone's corpse dress is probably something I'll never forget.

The soundtrack is incredible. "Weight of the World/End of YoRHa" is a standout track not just because of the ending it plays through, but also just because of how cleanly it blends together the 8-bit sound from the hacking minigames and the English and Japanese versions of the song, and how it ends with the game's fictional "Chaos" language (which is apparently meant to be a futuristic blend of English, Japanese, Gaelic, and a few others). I definitely want to check out more of Keiichi Okabe's work, and that of the singers for all three languages. Some other favs are "Vague Hope," "Wretched Weaponry," "Alien Manifestation," and "The Tower."

I enjoyed most of the gameplay. The hacking minigames could be a little tedious sometimes, but overall, I found myself enjoying 9S's gameplay more than the other leads' because of it. I also actually liked most of the sidequests, too, and I normally don't like those all that much in other games (well, okay, I mainly just hate them in FF7R). I think I liked the machine quests the most because so many of them were just silly and low stakes, which was a nice change of pace compared to the main story. I remember the Father Servo one making me laugh a few times. And as for the androids, I liked 11B's memento quest and the Amnesia one (partly because 2B and 9S bicker so much through it, and partly because it's the first we hear about execution models).

I loved the voicework in this game, especially A2 and Anemone's. And whoever voiced 9S did his job perfectly.

I was crying through that whole Ending E sequence, but the part where the POD asks you something like "You put all that work into unlocking Chapter Select. Are you SURE you want to delete all your save data?" made me crack up. I'm doing a replay now, and Chapter Select is probably what I miss most from my original save data lmfao.

So... yeah? Overall, I liked it. I really do think that credits sequence was what sold me on this game as a whole, as weird as that sounds. I'd say the game's biggest faults are the unbalanced focus on the leads and its tendency to throw in pointless angst here and there, and I really wish those two things could've been smoothed out to make a good story even better, but eh. I'm enjoying my replay now, and I'm taking my time doing more quests and exploring areas. I'm going to try to get more of the joke endings, too.

[solcomfortssouls]

Avengers Endgame review

This movie suffered a bit from the sheer amount of content that made it all a bit hrr and chaotic, but everything I was looking forward to was there and some more, so I'm actually pretty satisfied.

Firstly, this movie was very Iron man centric and as a big Tony Stark fan I loved every part of it. Tony's conflict in this movie was about choosing between the happiness of his family and his own time with them and the greater good of the whole universe and for me it overshadowed everyone else.

Tony having a family and a daughter for 5 happy years. Oh god, that was so sweet and deserved. A nice house by the lake, and a cute little girl that Tony treats so lovingly while staying in character. Also his relationship with Pepper is amazing here - he told her immediately what he was thinking about doing, and she knew and loved him enough to understand he wouldn't be able to give it a rest. He wouldn't be able to let go of the chance, possible only because of his brilliant mind. She knew she married a genius with obsessive compulsion to fix the world. Tony wouldn't be able to live with himself, if he didn't. But it was hilarious and heartbreaking seeing him so mad when he realized he figured it out. 

Morgan. I wonder what role she will play. I would love it if she did have some in the future. Even more if she did come up in connection with Peter somehow though that's unlikely. But every scene with her and Tony was perfection personalized.

Tony and Cap reconciling. Really all their scenes were excellent. Cap helping Tony out of the jet, Tony saying he couldn't stop Thanos, Tony saying he lost the kid in that broken tone... Then Tony getting angry because he was right to be afraid so much ahead of time and then blaming Cap and passing out...That was powerful. Not that I think he was completly right to blame Cap, and it was cruel to say that to him. But it was so in character for Tony and I felt deeply for them and their suffering in that scene.

But then Tony and Cap making amends was very satisfying. Cap still came to Tony with the time travel idea and accepted when Tony rejected him out of the concern for his family. But I think Cap knew that Tony wouldn't give it a rest, that by giving him the thought he would definitely obsess over it until he figured it out. And despite Tony having the most to lose out of all of them, he hated he couldn't save Peter. That was a loss heavily hanging on him and tipping him over the edge in his decision.

Then all the scenes showing Tony and Cap trusting each other was just plain joy. It almost makes up for the fact that Cap wasn't there in Tony's last moments. But I guess there were only so many characters that could be by his side when he was dying and the people chosen - Rhody, Peter and Pepper - were definitely Tony's most treasured people that brought him peace.

Peter coming back and Tony immediatly hugging him. Oh Peter. Also Peter running with the gauntlet and being helped by all the other heroes. Really a parent team for him.

Peter crying by Tony's side. Like that heartbroken sobbing and how he tried talking to him, waking him. Oh kid. I'm interested to see how much this will impact Peter in future movies. 

Tony's death scene. I loved how Pepper didn't have a freak out but instead calmly reassured him that they would make it, that they would be okay in the world he saved for them. She was aware what was Tony staking and she truly understood who he was, accepted and loved him for it. What a beautiful love. Tony fought and struggled and obsessed and cared and suffered enough. He has done enough. He can rest now. It doesn't seem fair to me he died when he finally achieved genuine happiness - with a family and Peter back. But that's the thing with tragic and untimely death, with sacrifaces for something bigger, with battles of this scale and the loss it accompanies. And it really brings home what's at risk when someone precious is actually lost. 

From narrative standpoint it makes sense because Tony wouldn't be able just stay out of the way after giving up the mantle to other heroes. There is no way he would be able to live in peace when others were in trouble. To keep him true to himself and to keep him out, they had to kill him.

It's a bit different with Cap's ending. He already lived and fought in two wars, helped more then anyone could have hoped or expected him to. So Cap took Tony's advice and example by finally making a real life for himself. I think he deserved it after all he has done for earth. Plus I have seen people saying that it went against his development of moving on from his past, but if you look closer Cap's arc was never about moving on. It's something he encouraged in others but didn't know how to do for himself. Besides Avengers were special by not letting things go and attempting the impossible. Cap was stuck in the wrong century, forced to live a different life, far from his home. I don't blame him for using the chance to have it all back when he could. Besides the world doesn't need him anymore. There is enough of superheroes that the responsibility can fall off his shoulders. It was okay for him to let go and he was able to in contrast to Tony who wouldn't be able to do so, had he survived. 

It's a bit confusing with the time travel, but technically if changing something in the past leads to the same future anyway, then they used time travel without erasing everything that happens in the previous movies. Cap still returned from the ice and fought with the Avengers and met old Peggy but also had a life with her. The rules are not that clear, but I understand what they were trying to do here.

The costs of victory in this film were real and painful. Gamora forgetting her bonding with the Guardians and what person it made her into. Vision not coming back. Natasha. Cap choosing to have a life instead of saving the world over and over. And God, Tony. His whole arc came to an incredible conclusion. He had a family and a lovely relationship with his daughter. And I felt his internal conflict the most. It was a lot different for him then for the others because he didn't lose everything. He had to actually decide between having a happy life with his family or dying to save the universe. Between his own self-interest and his family or the chance of bringing everyone else's family back. (Nice little callback to what his father was worried about too. And I'm happy he got closure from the prove his father did love him).

His funeral hurt. It was so emotional to see all the characters, even the Guardians honouring his death.

The way he saved everyone - not just earth but the whole universe by what he did was epic and I pretty much coudn't breathe. When Strange held up that one finger and realization fleshed in Tony's eyes that this was the only way. Oh Tony. 

To me Clint's arc of going dark after the loss of his family came off as a bit cliche and his willingness to die for Nat when he had a family to live for as unrealistic - was it to show his guilt about his actions as Ronin or his closeness to Nat or his heroic character? But I'm not much of a fan of either Clint or Nat so no surprise this wasn't emotionally moving for me. Admittedly Clint's acting was believable in the heartbreaking scenes, and he really shined while protecting the gauntlet. I was kinda proud Earth had a pretty capable protector for the infinity stones themselves in the shape of one Clint Barton.

Scott turned out important but many of his dialogue and comments were just for fun and came off to me as a bit improper. I didn't really care about him at all. But I have never been much of a fan of his.

The whole combination of Hulk-Bruce, Scott's goofiness and chubby drunk Thor that couldn't focus felt a bit jarring. It was too ridiculous to be taken seriously. Rocket I could still take. Not all of them combined.

Hulk-Bruce just felt so...out of nowhere? I was intrigued by Bruce's conflict with Hulk in Infinity War and how they were going to solve it. But this? Bruce's arc was always about accepting Hulk as part of himself instead for as his enemy. This flash-forward resolving all this off screen felt cheap and I couldn't take Hulk-Bruce seriously as result.

Thor. Hmm. I didn't care much about him before Ragnarok, but he really charmed me there. So it was interesting seeing this broken side of him. It was realistic to his character since Thor is a fighter and a man of action and not killing Thanos when he had the chance really was kinda his fault. Where was he aiming? I understand he blamed himself for this the most and that even after killing Thanos nothing was solved and even worse for Thor there was no one to fight. Nothing to do but face the emptiness of his failure. Without a pressing goal or enemy Thor neglected himself and I found it believable. As much as I missed the handsome strong Thor. But he was mentally broken and him going with the Guardians means his story is not over. He didn't have all that much to offer in the last battle - the spotlight was on Cap and Tony since this was the ending to their arcs and journeys, the peak of all their development, them reaching their full potential (Steve wielding Mjolnir, Thor and Tony's tech combined, Pep in Iron suit).That's why Thor is allowed to make heavy mistakes here. 

Let's not forget all the interactions of the original Avenegers plus Nebula and Rocket as a whole. Tony, Steve and Nat putting the puzzle pieces together for the time travel heist, Nebula and her revelations and the others feeling for her, (plus how Rhodey sympathised with her), Steve and Nat scenes and Nat and Clint scenes. They really tried to do their bond justice with these and in the mourning of Nat in the later half. 

Nebula proved pretty interesting this movie. There was a lot of emotional results to what have been done to her and I actually quite enjoyed the focus on her and her reunion with Gamora. 

The last battle was grand, with so many characters coming to defend the Earth. It felt so well deserved after Tony, Steve and Thor fought tooth and nail with Thanos to bring everyone back, that all the saved came to back them up. I loved Cap's "Reassemble" - that was incredibly well played.

I would critise the shifts between the individual plot lines were sometimes too jarring. It was chaotic, coming from one impactful scene only to get hit with another, with little to no breathing room or time to savour the atmosphere in-between. I guess that was hard to avoid with the amount and concentration of plot and characters. Infinity War succeeded in balancing emotion, action and humour, but Endgame felt like a mess of heavy scenes mixed with a lot of out of place humour.

All in all it was a bit messier but rewarding, deeply thought-out with some characters and a bit rushed with others. I have definitely found new favourite scenes and can't wait to see Endgame again.

[em-exceeds-change-zearu]

These are the obvious choices but! Logi or Roy for the ask uwu

uwu

Logi

how i feel about this character: the plot needs to stop bullying this poor child pronto but i also want it to bully him more. he deserves none of this suffering but god if it doesn’t make him all the stronger for it

all the people i ship romantically with this character: edgar. full stop.

my non-romantic OTP for this character: sabareta! he was such a good foil/mentor to logi in chapter one, such a good mirror to show how even a good idealistic boy can be twisted into what he was. the fact that logi was able to revive his old idealism but he was still able to be the practical, battle-hardened rebel in the end was great.

also this makes me cry every time the first time i noticed timeskip!logi’s bandanna was similar to sabareta’s and then his J+ story came out and flat out confirmed it’s there to help him keep the same resolve and i just…cries. cries forever.

my unpopular opinion about this character: logi wasn’t an idiot in chapter 1! he was just really naive! naive  =/= idiocy ok. and he had his requisite character development in chapter 1 after facing his own powerlessness and while you think that would result in the typical Shonen Protag Triumphs it does not. instead it ruins everything because he isn’t able to recognize dias’ slipping into the darkness until too late and then he has to retreat into hiding after being unjustly branded a traitor and has to genuinely confront his own weakness and inability to make hard decisions to achieve the peace he sorely wants, etc. he wasn’t stupid but his naivety cost him greatly in the end and that was something he had to face. and he does and comes out all the stronger for it.

however the general opinion that he becomes a more well-rounded and nuanced character in chapter 2 onwards is one that i accept wholeheartedly i’m so proud of him

one thing i wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: i want more of Logi & Edgar’s Fantastic Adventures. please. they bounce off each other so great. but also i want to know more about the one and a half year timeskip and what he did. because while he was severely depressed in his J+ event by the end of it he seems to be able to look forward to the future somewhat optimistically and hasn’t lost all of his naviete. But when he shows up again in Chapter 2 he’s somehow managed to revive the Blue Flame Guard as a voluntary corps and has also become quite the negative nancy.

this hurt my heart so badly the first time i read it my poor baby i’m so glad he’s regained the will to fight for those naive ideals again. seriously child what happened to you how did you accomplish all this and got so sad as a result I WANT TO KNOW WE’VE GOT AT LEAST THREE MORE CHAPTERS OF STORY TO GO THROUGH WILL I EVER FIND OUT??? I DON’T KNOW  !!!! !1 WHY AM I SO INVESTED IN THIS GATCHA GAME WHEN THE STORY CHAPTERS ARE RELEASED AT THE SPEED OF MOLASSESS I’M SO MAD

my OTP: you can guess at this point. look. looooook. they just mesh so well with each other and i love their interactions and they’re really cute and edgar’s one of the few people that timeskip!logi laughs around and they have a combination attack and it’s super cute 

look at the casual teamwork and how well edgar’s spontenaity and mind for improvisation balances with logi’s steadiness and power and and and cries

my cross-over ship: funnily enough despite all the crossovers tagatame has had so far, edgar and dias have had crossover storylines before logi does. i wanna see a crossover storyyyyy whiiineeesss. does he get the radiant historia one. i hope so. i wanna see him interact with stocke and co. pleeeaaase . .  . . 

a headcanon fact: i want to believe so many things about logi having leviathan in his possession but i don’t know how many of them have been/will be jossed by canon. really what the big point is what did leviathan dooooo. did it revive him after he was straight up killed by dias. did it save his life instead. will it exact a price from him later. has it bound itself to him. i don’t know i don’t knowwwww. hhHHH I HAVE. SO MANY IDEAS AND NONE OF THEM WILL BE TRUE BUT UNTIL THEN THEY REMAIN HEADCANON FACTS TO ME

Roy

how i feel about this character: GOOD SON BOY! THAT’S OUR BOY RIGHT THERE!!!! OUR BOY ! ! !!! !!

all the people i ship romantically with this character: okay look. there’s lilina of course, but also i ship him a little with sophia because shared dragon ancestry. my Heroes ship for him is with Julia though because in my Heroes roster they’ve been together since almost day one and they’ve grown stronger together and you all know about the shitpost joke i’ve made with them so

my non-romantic OTP for this character: guinivere. i’ve already made a longass post about this but look. Look. meeting her on a chance routing to pick up some mercenaries is what led to their parties meeting and both of them wanting to stop this war was what led to him taking her on as part of his party despite her clearly being part of the enemy faction - not only that, but the literal Actual princess of the enemy country and just. watching them both grow into people who can lead an army and a country over the course of the war is just real fucking good and you know they share a real strong intergenerational friendship because of it all okay? okay.

my unpopular opinion about this character: i actually don’t have a problem with roy’s Shitty Stats? i’ve always seen fire emblem as a kind of chess-like map game: he’s the king piece you have to get to the end. he’s not necessarily meant to go around killing things and getting stronk, that’s what you have the other characters around him for. his even stat growths contribute to that and they also make sense plotwise too: he’s a Baby, only fifteen. even compared to other young Lords he’s absurdly young and still in the middle of his studies. so the trend growing to Strong Lords in more recent games, while it’s not something i’m super pressed about, it’s not something i care for much either? weak chesspiece lords are also valid

i do have a problem with his absurdly late in-game promotion though urgh. either give him another promotion halfway through the game OR MAKE IT EARLIER, OR SOMETHING??? GOD. plotwise it makes sense BUT GAMEPLAYWISE IT’S STUPID

one thing i wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: [SLAMS HANDS ON TABLE] CONFIRM. THE DRAGON. HERITAGE. I DON’T CARE IF BEING A QUARTER-DRAGON IS TOO LITTLE TO HAVE ANY VISIBLE EFFECT ON HIM I JUST REALLY LIKE THE FACT THAT BLAZING BLAZE GIVES THE OPPORTUNITY TO RETCON ROY’S ACHIEVEMENTS IN BINDING BLADE INTO AN INCREDIBLE SHOW OF IRONY, OKAY

my OTP: lilina. first girl is best girl. 

my crossover ship:  does the ship with julia count? yes? no? it’s technically crossing games over. 

a headcanon fact: this child spends millions of years in any library he can get his hands on and you will pry that truth from my cold dead hands

[baby-daddy-bella]

HEY! Brown blondish wavy hair w/ big hazel/green eyes &some freckles. Do not cross me b/c i refuse to back down from ANY fight so good luck. Pretty cocky, but can be a little shy at first.Love good ass music(metal, classic rock, indie)&thriller movies.Extremely passionate,competitive, tend to be a smart mouth.VERY kinky and into a lot of shit.Wide range sense of humor,big flirt unintentionally &bigger flirt intentionally.Down for anything.Style can go from 80s inspo,current trends,to grunge.

Bowers Gang - Ship Request 11

A/N- hey! I’m super sorry this is kinda short and has taken me 10 years to post. Thanks for the request! Requests closed, new ships out soon x

I ship you with...

Patrick Hockstetter! (Y’all better stop stealing my man I stg)

> you are one of the prettiest girls in school

>so we all know Patrick feels obliged to have you

> he expected you to be quite easy, but was surprised by how long it took to win you over

> your shyness made him think you’d give in easily

> but the more he tried & got to know you, the more he discovered that you were actually kinda resistant

> you guys argue a lot

> both of you refuse to accept that the other person is right, So fights are usually never resolved

> you’ll stop talking to him for like a day, but then he’ll kiss you or something and then you’ve forgiven him in no time

> LIKE WHO COULD RESIST HIM????

> music is a small part of the relationship, but you usually listen to it while making out

> Passionate and competitive is the perfect way to describe your relationship

> you’re both very similar, so sometimes personalities clash and you get into more fights

> but you can never seem to keep away from each other

> he only loves the smart mouth thing if it’s directed at someone else

> if you’re being cocky with him he will get SO MAD and there is no going back from that

> usually results in angry sex is all I’m saying don’t blame me

> kinky? Say no more. He already loves you

> (lol not really Patrick could never he only likes people)

> you make each other laugh a lot

> like he genuinely smiles when he laughs

> his face lights up, he throws his head back and it’s the CUTEST THING EVER

> you guys share clothes all the time

> down for anything means that Patrick can persuade you into ANYTHING

> which never ends well

> everyone becomes concerned about you because of how much trouble you get into when you are with him

> you get sick of people telling you to break up with him “for your own good”

> “HELL NO”

Brittany Coleman, your best friend exclaimed, as the two of you walked down the halls of Derry High School.

“What do you mean hell no? I think he’s cute.”

She gave you a strange look, “This is Patrick Hockstetter we’re talking about right? Sure he’s good looking but he’s a pure freak.”

You sighed and shrugged, “I guess—I just feel like he’d be fun to be around.”

She scoffed, “Yeah I’m sure he would be if you wanna get murdered.”

You rolled your eyes, “Whatever.”

“Anyway, this is me.” She said, stopping in front of the classroom she intended to go into, “Don’t get into too much mischief while I’m gone.” She joked, ruffling your hair.

You gave her an over emphasised, closed mouth smile and then ushered her into the classroom. As soon as she was gone, you made your way to your own class with a stern look on your face. “Stupid bitch.” You mumbled, putting your hair back into place.

“Who is?” A voice asked from behind you, a clear smile reflecting in their voice.

“None of your business.” You replied, face to face with Patrick Hockstetter.

“Oh yeah?”

“Oh yeah.”

He chuckled at your response, “You know I underestimated you.” He said.

“What’s that? Some sort of compliment?”

He nodded and grinned, “Absolutely.”

“You’re definitely special, Patrick.”

“You’re so right.” He said, slinging an arm around your shoulders. Some other students in the corridor gave you both strange glances.

Patrick, in an attempt to antagonise you, grinned and said, “You know we should—“

You cut him off before he could finish his sentence, “Go out tonight? Exactly what I was thinking. Good call Patrick.” You smiled and kissed his cheek.

His eyes widened and his face dropped. It was incredibly rare that a girl even kindly received his flirtatious nature, nevermind complied and agreed to go out with him. He found it interesting that she had been so confident.

You noticed that he was still silent and smiled, “I guess I’ll meet you at Rosie’s at six thirty.”

He nodded, “It’s a date.”

You moved his arm from around your shoulders and slipped into the classroom you had been walking to, giving him a slight wave as you disappeared out of sight.