#The concept of friendship being the polar opposite of fear | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

n1kolaiz · 4 years ago

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"Man fears death and yet, at the same time, man is drawn to death. Death is endlessly consumed by men in cities and in literature. It is a singular event in one's life that none may reverse. That is what I desire."

Character Analysis: Dazai Osamu

Age: 22 || Ability: No Longer Human

I've done a lot of research concerning Dazai's character because of how complex he'd initially appeared to me. It is still a question as to what his personality type is; some say he's an ENTP while others argue that he's an INTJ, and his enneagram would most likely be 7w8 (The Realist), but that isn't the thing I'm going to focus on.

According to general databases and fan analyses, his temperament is dominantly melancholic. A person's temperament is basically how they react to and live in this world. For those of you not interested in such details, don't worry, I'll get to my point.

The melancholic behaviour is characterised by individualism, self-reliance, and reservation. People of the melancholic temperament are described as having been overcome with sorrow and depressive thoughts, which is beyond the feeling of "just being sad."

Nonetheless, they are generally calm beings, with a tendency to hide how they truly feel by keeping their composure, even in events that demand severe reaction otherwise. Other aspects of melancholic temperaments is that they are absorbed in the cruelty and tragedy of this world, and tend to get lost in their thoughts.

Sound familiar?

Dazai is seen to be as the comic relief of the adaptation, and he'd never fail to bring about a sense of lightheartedness to relieve the serious moments; we all know that for sure. Remember the time both him and Kunikida found Nobuko Sasaki in that godforsaken hospital, and how Kunikida asked him about his opinion on the current state of affairs?

But, despite having developed a calm and serene personality, Dazai's dark side was more apparent during the Dark Era. There was a type of intimidating and arrogant flair evident in his behaviour, or even on his face. It was the type of demeanour that came off cold and terrifying to the rather unlucky people he dealt with. In a moment's notice, they could literally die by his hands. And I believe most of them usually did. It was during this time, he was more brutal and vicious. He lacked remorse. Plus, Dazai's suicidal ideations were more dense during this Era, and his suicidal tendencies did not do anything to alleviate the depth of how dark his character was posed to be.

Side note: Unfortunately, people misunderstand this 'depressed' part of Dazai; they minimise his character so much to the point that people use only a single word to describe him: suicidal. He is, in fact, so much more than that. I'll elaborate more on that in a while.

"Hey, Odasaku, do you know why I joined the Mafia? I joined the Mafia because of an expectation I had. I thought if I was close to death and violence—close to people giving in to their urges and desires, then I would be able to see the inner nature of humankind up close. I thought if I did that… I would be able to find something—a reason to live."

Dazai's approach to life is that of an aimless soul, weary of the world's oppressions and exhausted from the concept of living itself. Nevertheless, what he said above about having an expectation made me realise something: he had a goal, which he wasn't that enthusiastic about achieving—seeking for a reason to carry on with life. So he joined the Mafia.

And there, he met Oda Sakunosuke.

Despite how resilient Dazai carried himself to be (especially during the Dark Era), this specific excerpt stands in direct opposition of how he effortlessly embodied all things daunting:

"With every step I take, I feel as though the earth has opened up into a bottomless pit as I fall endlessly. As Dazai pointed to his forehead and approached the muzzle, the look on his face – like that of a child about to burst into tears – had already been branded upon my eyes."

- quoted by Oda Sakunosuke, excerpt from Dazai Osamu and the Dark Era Light Novel.

When I read this, it sent my mind into a spiral of despair and confusion. It was so vague, yet it made so much sense. Dazai was desperate to escape from this life, but part of him seemed to live in conflict with his desire for death. I won't elaborate more on this, because this specific excerpt has personal meaning to me, as I'd expect it to have for others as well; so I wouldn't want to ruin anyone else's perception on it.

Back to my point: Odasaku was one of the only characters who managed to interpret the complexity of Dazai's mindset and was able to compartmentalise the specific details of his persona that made Dazai the way he was. Oda knew that Dazai wasn't just suicidal.

"For most things in life, it's harder to succeed than fail. Wouldn't you agree? That's why I should attempt suicide rather than commit it! Committing suicide is difficult, but it should be relatively easier to fail at attempting suicide!"

Others boasted about how he was just a suicidal maniac, and that was only because of how good Dazai was at concealing his own feelings whilst flamboyantly priding himself in new, risky techniques, which he sometimes elaborated on. But Oda, on the other hand, saw through his jokes, and empathised with his friend, never wanting to ever barge into his vulnerability without Dazai's permission, but still trying to be there for him.

"Listen. You told me if you put yourself in a world of violence and bloodshed, you might be ale to find a reson to live. You won't find it. You should know that. Whether you're on the side that takes lives or the side that saves them, nothing beyond your own expectations will happen. Nothing in this world can fill the hole that is your loneliness. You will wander the darkness for eternity."

Notice how Odasaku recognised Dazai's despair, before Dazai even dared to acknowledge his very own emotions? That was why, at Oda's death, he took the initiative to uncover Dazai's bandaged eye to show him that there was no use in concealing his feelings anymore.

Odasaku's last words to Dazai was to "be on the side that saves people," for he was aware that even though Dazai didn't believe there was a clear distinction between good and evil, he thought that perhaps Dazai would find meaning in his life, even if it was just a little bit of purpose.

In Dead Apple, we briefly relive this moment, but I'll write more on that some other time.

And when Dazai joined the ADA, he loses that dark side to him. No, wait, let me rephrase that: he loses a part of that dark side to him. He eliminated the raw sense of bitterness against the world from his face, and instead, he is seen to be a little more passive, and a little more adaptive. No doubt, he still does explicitly state his desire to die, but his wishes are very specific, if you know what I mean.

And a few years later, his journey with Atsushi began.

Atsushi and Dazai's relationship is just one of a kind. I think it isn't a matter of whether Atsushi needed Dazai, or whether Dazai needed Atsushi. It's the fact that they both needed each other. It's the way they both worked hand in hand, and how they sustained each other in ways they were lacking.

The two were polar opposites, but they had a tender kind of warmth embedded in their protectiveness for each other. Atsushi was just as lost as Dazai, but somehow, they worked together just fine. It was like their duality was meant to be. It was the type of symbiotic relationship, where their care for each other was implied, but very deep.

Does this also sound familiar... perhaps, in relation to Dazai's friendship with Odasaku?

Side note: Oda and Atsushi have the same enneagrams, which is Type 2, 'The Helper.'

There is a sort of balance that is brought about by two opposites. Odasaku taught Dazai many things, and I believe Oda learned a lot about a man's life from the way Dazai lived out his life with the innate desire to die. Atsushi sought for the right to live, while Dazai searched for a reason to live; in addition, Dazai validated Atsushi's feelings, and Atsushi was able to acknowlegde the amount of pain Dazai was going through.

Despite how Dazai's perspectives and beliefs stood in contrast with those of Oda's and Atsushi's, a type of inseparable bond connected the man who no longer felt like he was human, to the people who was the most human.

No Longer Human in the Japanese romaji is 'Ningen Shikkaku.' Ningen means "human," and Shikkaku means "disqualified." The late author, Dazai Osamu, wrote the book No Longer Human. He had gone through the rough throes of trauma and wrote this book as a semi-autobiography, whose plot was centred around a man who faked happiness, for he was tainted by the truth that everyone around him was fake themselves. He turned his life into a joke in order to protect himself from the delusions of this world.

This brings us back to the melancholic temperament, where a person was too deeply immersed in the sad truths of reality and the world itself.

And that's what Dazai's character and ability is based on: being disqualified as a human being, because he wasn't well-versed with what being human was actually like. The fabrications of being human sprung up all around him, but he wasn't willing to be fooled by how ingenuine the world truly was.

“I am convinced that human life is filled with many pure, happy, serene examples of insincerity, truly splendid of their kind—of people deceiving one another without (strangely enough) any wounds being inflicted, of people who seem unaware even that they are deceiving one another.”

- excerpt from Dazai Osamu's No Longer Human.

People who don't feel human emotions or don't react to circumstances the way humans do have a variety of ways of explaining how they feel inhuman. They are highly intelligent, which separates them from the average class of humankind, since they've analysed and untangled the truths of life in order to attain understanding, which they value above all else. But, this understanding of the world and its painful truths results in a deep kind of sorrow, which only a few people can seem to empathise with in order to help them out with that burden.

“Pain and suffering are always inevitable for a large intelligence and a deep heart. The really great men must, I think, have great sadness on earth.”

-excerpt from Fyodor Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment.

Don't you think that this deep sorrow that lies in the heart of the intelligent, makes them the most human of all? They're too human, to the point where they don't feel human. Perhaps, it is a type of defence mechanism, where the mind numbs the heart from feeling normal human emotion, because logically breaking down such concepts is easier than feeling them. But it comes at a price. The heart is willing to recklessly comprehend and fathom any sort of emotion, including pain in its true form, but the mind bears more pain in understanding such concepts because it seeks to decipher every single agonising detail of how complex human emotions are. The mind thinks, the heart feels. There is a clear distinguishing factor between the two. Whether feeling hurts more than thinking, or thinking hurts more than feeling, or whether both these processes work hand-in-hand to make up the reality of life itself, is up for an individual to decide.

Only a few people can seem to empathise with intelligent people who are deeply sad at heart, in order to help them out. As for Dazai, it was Atsushi and Oda. They never took away the pain, but they made him grow from it; it worked vice versa, too.

Of course, there are less tedious and more appealing aspects to the concept of Dazai's intelligence. Dazai was seen as a threat to his enemies because of how manipulation and his keen skill of deduction made up how sharp his mind was. Besides, no one could commit '138 murders, 312 cases of extortion, and 625 cases of fraud, along with various and sundry other crimes,' without having a certain level of intelligence, right?

Dazai had the moral alignment of 'chaotic neutral.' He was more focused on using his intellect to achieve the desired end results of a predicament, and he wasn't afraid to use the wrong means. A famous example was when he deflated the airbags of Ango Sakaguchi's car in order to gain the assured protection of Kyouka Izumi.

Justice is a weapon. It can be used to cause harm, but it cannot protect or save others.

Another example was when he blew up Chuuya Nakahara's car.

Just kidding. That was just a simple pastime (；・∀ ・)

His moral alignment points to what Oda said about him: the part where he mentioned that Dazai didn't really see any difference between good and evil. As long as his ends were achieved, especially if it were in the benefit of his fellow colleagues, he wasn't afraid to exploit, threaten, or endanger others' wellbeing. Because, at the end of the day, the end result triumphed the morally bad methods utilised to achieve it, correct? He always had a reason for his motives and actions, even if those actions were evil and inexcusable.

(eg. action: the psychological abuse he bestowed upon Akutagawa Ryunosuke.

motive: to enable him to hone his own ability favourably and to curb his arrogance)

But the consequences of one's actions will always catch up with a person, no matter what heights they've achieved.

Okay, we're reaching the end of my rambling very soon, I promise.

“If I had to go, I’d like to go out just as beautifully.”

“I’d prefer you don’t go.”

This part of the post is highly inspired by iwachuwu!!

An important factor of Dazai's development is highlighted BSD Wan's episode 10:

I'd like to appreciate that this scene focuses on how much Dazai actually means to Atsushi. When Atsushi responds with "I'd prefer you don't go," he said it lightheartedly for he thought Dazai was joking. But he wasn't. And once Atsushi absorbed the fact that Dazai meant what he said, he was overwhelmed with anguish at the thought of ever losing Dazai. Dazai, on the other hand, had a sense of longing on his expression. There was that look of pure desperation on his face. He was so desperate, yet he knew he couldn't act on his desperation due to a promise he'd made to someone dear to him. But keep in mind, Dazai is unpredictable, so we can never be sure of what's going on in that headspace of his.

Nevertheless, this time, Atsushi recognised Dazai's suffering, as no one usually cared to do, and Dazai didn't put in any effort to hide how he truly felt, as he habitually did. And this mutual emotional connection happened countless times during all the times Oda spent with Dazai as well.

To summarise,

Dazai's character had been carefully wired and patterned out in a way only a few would put in the effort to understand. Dazai was more than just suicidal; he was a being wandering from place to place with no specific aim. He was too smart for his own good. Dazai understood too well of how the world worked and deemed it void of any sort of hope.

Side note: Yes, the truth does come at a price, but it all comes down to how a person understands the truth. As for Dazai (both character and the author he was based off upon), well, it was quite tragic. But that's the way it is for some people, I suppose. But everyone has a different path to travel on, remember that.

His transition from working with the Port Mafia to the Armed Detective Agency was proof of how well-executed his character development was. It was two different personas morphed into what he is today: a womaniser with questionable morals a person who is still standing even after the rough refining process endowed upon him by the realities of this life.

However, he had people along the way come and teach him a thing or two, which perhaps made his life a little more interesting. Perhaps these people were passing clouds that hid the void out of sight for just a moment, and Dazai was always seen to be grasping on to these moments, and letting them go whenever it was time to let go.

His outlook on life makes his intellect look all the more intriguing. It shows that not only does his intelligence contribute to his own wit and shrewdness, but also the practical sense of realism that explains how tired he is of the concept of living because of the truths there are to bear.

However he's enduring the pain right now is by far the most bravest thing a person could commit themselves to doing. It takes courage, and it takes strength, but only a few would ever take the time to recognise such efforts.

Dazai has one of the most beautiful character developments, but I do hope that the development doesn't reach its end anytime soon.

fanart credits: @S7dOZPN3jWBB6cW on twitter

“Now I have neither happiness nor unhappiness.

Everything passes.

That is the one and only thing that I have thought resembled a truth in the society of human beings where I have dwelled up to now as in a burning hell.

Everything passes.”

excerpt from Dazai Osamu's No Longer Human.

#bsd #bsd dazai #bungo stray dogs #bungo stray dogs wan #bsd wan #bsd dazai osamu #bsd characters #literature analysis #literature #dazai osamu #bsd odasaku #bsd atsushi #bsd analysis #bsd atsushi nakajima #.ryley.speaks

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lxme-xss-imxgines · 4 years ago

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When the Day Met the Night

Prompt: What happens when polar opposite celestial beings are plopped onto an island alone in mortal form?

Pairing: reader (moon) x jung hoseok (sun)

Genre: fluff, angst, bad flow of writing lmfaooo n e way

Word count: 4.6k

Warnings: !!!!!! attempted suicide (nothing graphic), SO much angst

A/N: wow I love the song When the Day Met the Night by P!ATD, so here’s this lil thing. its kind of short but cute ???? Still not rlly sure if I like it or not but yk hahahaha n e way enjoy :)

***

when the moon fell in love with the sun

all was golden in the sky

all was golden when the day met the night

The moment the sun was created, he knew his job. Begin the day on earth and then bring it to an end. It was simple, as the earth and everything else revolved around him - quite literally. He didn’t really have anything to occupy his time, so he tended to do a lot of thinking.

One of his many questions, perhaps the one he thought about most,

“What happens when I go down? Is it just . . . darkness?”

He didn’t expect that one day, he would get his answer.

When the sun found the moon

She was drinking tea in the garden

Under the green umbrella trees

In the middle of summer

He had never thought that he would be anything more than a hot ball of fire in the sky. So when a piece of him detached and began to float somewhere new, he was worried.

Would he be able to return to the rest of him to become whole again? Where exactly was he going? To bring light somewhere else?

Not quite.

A voice rings and it startles him as he continues his journey through the universe, just drifting about.

“Who are you? Where are you taking me?”

Don’t be so nervous, Hoseok. There’s someone we want you to meet.

“I- I have so many questions. Who are you? Who am I to meet? Hoseok . . . is that my name?”

We’re everything and nothing all at once; don’t think about it too hard.

He did.

You’ll be okay. Rest assured. We’ll talk again on your trip back.

“Wait! You still haven’t told me-”

Until later, Hoseok. Enjoy your time.

A bright light is suddenly visible, almost seeming to bring a light ache.

He can feel something beneath him, not hard but not too soft either. It was comfortable. Slowly, the light began to dim. He could feel something tickling him, and a sound erupts from him - laughter? Hoseok thinks to himself.

New vocabulary seemed to rest in his head, and he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to use it properly or not. Or even what to use it for.

Over the past few minutes, the brightness in his eyes has completely faded to somehow reveal a pale blue sky with clouds scattered amongst it.

Is this what they see?

He looks down at his surroundings, the amount and vibrancy of colors shocking his eyes open even wider.

The green grass, the multicolored flowers, a fountain flowing ever so softly a few yards in front of his feet. A stone path lay to his right.

Hoseok prays that no one is watching him as he takes his very first steps ever, as it is quite embarrassing, like a colt attempting to stand for the first time. He takes notice that his legs are rather long - how old is this body that he’s inhabiting? He has no real concept of human age, but assumes in the very least that he is in a fully matured form.

He thinks he’s safe once he gets a little more confident in his steps, taking it little by little.

And then he hears the faintest laugh, startling him and he loses balance, landing in the grass on his hands and knees.

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry! I really didn’t mean to startle you. I didn’t really think I was capable of doing so . . .”

He wearily looks up to face the owner of the voice, feeling his cheeks heat from his own embarrassment.

When the moon found the sun

He looked like he was barely hanging on

But her eyes saved his life

In the middle of summer

He didn’t really know what to expect, but he surely wasn’t expecting her.

Long silver hair framed her face, matching her set of silver eyes that were glimmering as she looked down at him. Her skin held a glow, not quite like his, but more subtle. Yet it was somehow more eye-catching, the glimmer that spread across her skin catching every ray of his light and reflecting.

“I-uh,” Hoseok shakes his head, finally reaching for her hand,”you don’t have to apologize. It’s just kind of embarrassing is all.”

He pulls himself up with the help of this mystery girl, finally feeling like his legs are his own.

They kind of stand there for a second, hands still touching as they observe each other. However, Hoseok startles out of it first, pulling his hand away.

“Um, I suppose you’re who I’m to meet? I’m Hoseok . . . I guess you may know me as the guy that lights up the Earth and what not.” he tilts his head, wondering if he’ll get recognition.

Her eyes widen like saucers, her mouth dropping open slightly,”You’re the sun? They didn’t tell me I would be meeting you! Oh goodness, I feel so unprepared . . . “ her hands come up to squish her face out of anxiety, and she completely forgets to return the introduction.

“I, uh . . . can I know your name?”

She looks up with a small gasp, her hand coming up to hit her forehead,”I’m sorry, I’m such a space case. No pun intended. I’m y/n, or better known as the one who lights up the night, as you would say.”

Hoseok’s face crinkles in confusion,”There’s someone who lights up the night? But isn’t the night . . . dark? I mean, that’s what happens when I’m not there, right?”

The moon’s shoulders drop, any excitement previously held from meeting another being gone. Her eyebrows furrow,”Uh, yeah. I don’t really light it up like you do the day . . . it’s more like a night light. When you go down, I come up. The sun’s job is to provide light and warmth, otherwise the Earth would freeze over. And the moon- well, I really don’t know what my purpose is quite yet. I think I can do something to water . . . I don’t know.”

She fiddles with her hands and stares at her feet, and Hoseok feels a pang of guilt hit deep in his chest. Why does she know so much about him, yet he didn’t even know she existed? Another being, in the same solar system - was he that self centered? Absorbed and made ignorant by his own light? So swallowed by his own loneliness that he didn’t even consider the fact that maybe he might not be completely alone?

So he said, "Would it be all right

If we just sat and talked for a little while

If in exchange for your time

I give you this smile?"

So she said, "That's OK

As long as you can make a promise

Not to break my little heart

Or leave me all alone in the summer."

“Then we can figure it out together, yeah?” He lets his hand float in the air in front of her, hoping the offer was appropriate. His heart beats in anticipation.

She looks up, eyes widening once again,”huh?”

“Why you’re here, your purpose. We can figure it out together,” he flashes her a smile so bright and warm that she almost feels faint, her head going dizzy. Little did she know, she was having the exact same effect on him. “If that’s alright with you, of course?”

She hesitantly grabs his hand, settling for just hooking their pinkies. Her lips form a small smile,”I was just having tea under those trees, over there by the fountain. Would you like to join me?”

He restrained the strong want to smile at her nervousness, which he found strange (only because he’s never experienced it before) but also completely endearing.

She lightly pulled him toward a table with two chairs on opposite sides, nestled between two trees and only a few short steps away from the calm trickling of the fountain. One side of the table was a glimmering silver, the other a sparkling gold, with chairs to match. It made him chuckle lowly to himself.

He pulled out her seat for her before she could even think about it, a blush forming on her cheeks from the gesture.

He took the seat across from her and watched intently as she poured them each a cup, quietly offering him milk and sugar. He shook his head, regretting it not seconds later when the bitter liquid assaulted his newly formed taste buds, his scowl earning a chuckle from his counterpart.

He suddenly took notice of the detailing on the table. What he assumed to be a moon is carved into his side of the table, and a sun carved on y/n’s side.

“It’s supposed to be representative of a yin-yang symbol, if I remember correctly. A symbol of balance. Light and dark, male and female, day and night.”

Hoseok is quiet for a moment at this revelation before a question eventually bubbles into his head,”Where did you learn all of this? About me, about yin and yang, about tea?”

She giggles, but he’s not offended by him. He didn’t think it was possible, but his heart warms a little bit more at the sound.

“You help me find my purpose, and I’ll teach you about all the things I’ve learned. Deal?” she reaches her hand out over the table, anxiety bubbling in her gut at the thought of rejection. He senses her nerves, and if he had the strength to tell her there's no reason to fear rejection from him, he would.

However, he meets his hand with hers once again as reciprocating the handshake was all he could muster.

“Deal.”

And so their friendship began.

Well he was just hanging around

Then he fell in love

And he didn't know how

But he couldn't get out

Just hanging around

Then he fell in love

“Hoseok, be careful not to over-water the plants! You’ll drown them, silly,” y/n rushes over to where he’s standing in the garden, carefully tipping back the watering can before he turns their flower bed into a river bed.

Hoseok reaches behind his head, awkwardly scratching his neck,”I’m sorry, y/n. The soil was just looking a little dry. I didn’t mean-”

“Hey, sunshine. It’s okay. If those ones would’ve been overwatered, we can always just plant more,” she gives her usual small smile and carefully takes the watering can from him before returning it to the inside of their cottage.

Sunshine, one of her many nicknames for him. The difference with this one is that it always seemed to make his heart skip a beat when it left her mouth.

They had been staying on their little island for about a month and a half now, and they seem to have fallen into a comfortable rhythm of things. Drinking tea together, gardening together, swimming together - there was a small amount of activities that they did separately.

They both knew it was odd, as they were deemed to be polar opposites and honestly shouldn't be getting along so well. But yin-yang rang true, and they balanced each other out perfectly.

The only thing the moon did that annoyed the sun at times was something they call her “dark days”. He tries his hardest to understand it, but it’s difficult to empathize with a feeling you never experience.

Hoseok believes that it’s partially - no, scratch that - he believes it’s completely his fault.

When they first arrived he’d promised her he’d help her find her purpose, the reason she goes up into the sky at night; with a promise of knowledge about the universe in return.

Whilst he has received an immeasurable amount of knowledge thanks to y/n, it seems as if he hasn’t made any progress figuring out what she’s here for. He knows she has a purpose, he is 100% certain and he feels it in every fiber of his being. He just hasn’t figured out what exactly it is yet.

He still feels confused when she shuts herself in her room, and won’t come out for the majority of the day, only revealing herself to grab a glass of water and say goodnight to Hoseok.

And although he hasn’t quite grasped the feeling yet, he knows that it hurts her. He knows this because it’s what he feels on the days he doesn’t see her, the days she locks herself away. He doesn’t understand why it upsets him so much.

Today, luckily for both of them, is a good day. Or at least it started out as one.

As y/n’s eyes flutter open, the scent of something hits her nose. It’s bacon, she thinks - but it just smells a little-

“Oh no,” she practically rolls out of bed, darting into their kitchen to see Hoseok holding a pan of burnt bacon in one hand, the other hand reaching to turn the knob off.

“Y/n! I, uh, I’m sorry. I was trying to make breakfast for us, but ironically I haven’t really gotten a grip on the whole fire thing yet and-”

“Hobi, sunshine, it’s okay,” she walks over, taking the pan from him and pouring the grease into a jar before discarding the burnt bacon into the trash.

“You’re not upset?” he questions. He didn’t want to come off judgemental, but there was a day where y/n found a dried out worm on the pathways and proceeded to cry over it for two hours. If she shed some tears over burnt bacon, it would not have shocked him in the slightest.

“Of course not, you tried your best and that’s all that really matters,” she strokes his cheek slightly to comfort him before returning to make the breakfast he attempted.

He’s shocked by her upbeat demeanor, but he knows better than to look a gift horse in the mouth.

“So, what did you want to do today?” he leans against the counter and watches intently as she places bacon in the pan once more.

“I’m not sure. Maybe go for a walk? It’s cooler out today,” she close-mouthed smiles, knowing that means Hobi was feeling calm today, that most likely nothing was troubling him.

“That’s a great idea! Maybe you’ll find a new flower or berry or something!”

“Always the optimist,” she gives a light sigh as she flips the bacon, almost seeming to go out of focus; something she does quite often, Hoseok has noticed. It was odd, how she’d have this far off look in her eyes and yet still be able to complete whatever task she was working on. Like her body took control as her mind wandered away.

Breakfast continued without a hitch. They ate in relative silence, but it was a comfortable silence. One filled with stolen glances and small smiles.

After cleaning up, they chose a trail to take their walk on. It was one they’d only been down maybe once or twice, which left hoseok hoping y/n could discover something new. Something to distract her for a bit longer as he continues his research to figure out why y/n is here.

Sometimes Hoseok thinks that there’s no particular reason why Y/n is here, and he thinks of ways to explain that it would be okay if she didn’t have a reason, if she were to just be existing. But he plays the conversation in his head and he can see her facial expression after the words leave his mouth and then his stomach drops and then he forgets about even bringing it up to her all together.

“Hoseok?”

y/n calling his name knocks him out of his thoughts, his eyes landing on her small form. He smiles,”let’s go.”

She shakes her head and giggles slightly,”alright. Onward then.”

He gestures for her to walk first, and so she begins their trek down the trail. This one in particular winds through the woods, cuts through a clearing, and then leads down to the river. Even though they’ve only been down this one a small amount of times, and there is probably other trails, y/n thinks this one may be her favorite.

The breeze flutters y/n’s dress and hoseok’s loose white button up as they walk through the woods, the only sound heard being their footsteps and the occasional noise coming from an animal.

“Hobi?”

“Yes, nightlight?”

She hopes he doesn’t see her cheeks turn red.

“I know how you say I think too much and I should probably stop doing that-”

“But?”

She stops for a second, glancing up at him. He notices a second later, pivoting to return her gaze.

She lets out a little breath,”Do you not think about why we’re here? I mean, if it happened to you the same way it did me, a voice came to you and told you that they wanted you to meet someone, and all of a sudden you had a body and then you were here. I was here for a bit before you, and I thought the worst. I had done something wrong and now I was being banished to spend my life, however long that would be, on this island. Alone. And then you showed up . . . and now I’m even more confused.”

He can see her eyes starting to glaze over, and his stomach drops. That was the expression he was trying so hard to avoid seeing. Maybe he hadn’t tried hard enough to find out why she’s here. She was upset all over again and it was his fault.

He takes a step forward,”Y/n, just give me more time-”

“You shouldn’t need more time, Hoseok!” she grabs onto his sleeves, tears starting to flow from her eyes,”The reason why you can’t figure out why I’m supposed to be here is because I don’t need to be! I am unnecessary. You light up the whole earth and bring light and the day, hobi. What do I do? Why did they put me on this cage of an island with you of all beings? So I could feel even worse about myself?”

Her words startle him into speechlessness as he just stares at the tears flowing down her cheeks; he is frozen.

Her hands drop from his sleeves moments later and he still can’t find his voice.

“Just accept that I’m right, Hoseok. I am nothing.” she sighs once more and turns away from him, heading back down the path and toward the cottage.

The word nothing hits him like a bullet, so much force he almost actually stumbles backward. He’s suddenly out of his trance, and he marches forward, gently grabbing her shoulder and spinning her to face him.

“Don’t you dare call yourself nothing ever again. Ever.”

“Why not? It’s true, Ho-”

“I love you! Do you hear me, y/n? I am in love with you. Do you think that if you were nothing, if you meant nothing I would fall for you like I have? Do you know how insulting it is to have you call the thing I love most nothing? That is the last word I would use to describe you.”

“I-I’m sorry. But . . . that still doesn’t explain why I’m here. This isn’t about you, Hoseok. I understand the whole universe revolves around you and everything, but just because you fell in love with me doesn’t mean I have purpose all of a sudden. This doesn’t change anything.”

Her voice shook the whole time and tears kept leaving her eyes, all signs saying she didn’t mean a damn word she was saying - but to the sun, it felt as real as it could.

She walks away once more, and it wasn’t until she was out of his line of vision did he realize his cheeks were wet with hot tears.

One week later

Hollow.

Hollow is how Hoseok feels.

He doesn’t know what to do with himself. He has never felt this in his entire existence before.

Does he talk to her? Plead with the universe to return back to his place in the sky? Lay in his bed for the rest of eternity and wallow in self-pity?

The last one seemed the most appealing.

“You are the sun, Hoseok. The fucking sun for god sakes. And you can’t even manage to convince the girl you love that there’s purpose for her existence. Why isn’t my love for her enough? Why isn’t the way she makes me laugh, the way I get butterflies when I look at her . . . why isn’t that enough? Is this how she feels?”

Hoseok sits up as realization hits him like a freight train. He knows why she’s here. He’s finally figured it out.

***

Light knocks on wood are heard throughout the otherwise silent cottage as Hoseok’s knuckles rap against y/n’s door.

“Please come out. I- I really need to talk to you. I think . . . no, I know now. I figured it out, if you just- y/n? Why haven’t you started yelling at me yet?” slight worry settles in his stomach as he reaches for the doorknob, confusion filling his head as the door opens easily.

The room isn’t a mess as it had been previously, as y/n had a tendency to have her things scattered about. It was almost unsettling how clean and organized everything is. And sitting on her nightstand next to her bed is a folded piece of paper that makes his heart drop.

He hesitates to pick it up, but reluctantly opens it to see that it’s addressed to him.

“Dear Hoseok,

I am sorry. I can no longer bear the weight of having a physical body in which my consciousness resides. They won’t let me return back to my place in the sky where my celestial being is currently, so I must find a way to force them to. I just want you to take one thing away from this, if anything;

This is not your fault. I should not have given you such a big responsibility. It was my journey to embark on and I could not handle it, and I should not have expected you to be able to. Please do not blame yourself for the demise of my mortal body.

Thank you for everything.

Love, y/n”

The letter is crumpled into his fist as hot tears stream down his face. He begins to rip the letter into pieces and notices something.

“The ink is smearing . . . this has just been written . . . oh no,” he drops the remaining pieces of the letter and dashes out of the cottage. “If I were y/n, where would I go?”

He suddenly feels something wet on his face, and looks up to see a dark sky. It’s always sunny here. What is happening?

“The moon . . . pulls the tides. She’s going to try and drown herself,” hoseok starts running faster than he ever thought possible, trying to make it down to the shoreline in time. Although the island isn’t very large, she could be at any part of the shore.

Hoping that his intuition will take him to the right spot, he just keeps moving.

I have to make it in time. I have to.

Feeling as if his lungs will collapse once he finally reaches the shoreline, he panics as he can’t see her at first. But then he hears her, sobs racking her body.

Most of her body is submerged in the icy water, only visible from her elbows up as she sits in the sand.

He slowly approaches her, going in until the water hits his knees,”Y/n?”

“They won’t l-let me, Hoseok. They won’t let me,” another sob escapes her mouth, her shoulders shaking.

“Won’t let you what, nightlight?” he murmurs so soft he almost thought she couldn’t hear him.

“They won’t let me die!” a deep breath leaves her,”I can’t die. I can’t return to my home. I’m just stuck. Here, watch!”

He reaches out for her as she tries throwing herself in the water, but she doesn’t even hit the surface before the ocean comes rushing back toward her, standing her upright once again. Hoseok watches in awe.

“It’s yourself, you know. You won’t let yourself die. Because you know that’s not what you’re meant to do.”

“How exactly am I not letting myself die? Is throwing myself into the ocean not convincing enough for you?!” y/n is inches away from his face at this point, irritated at the complete calmness in his eyes.

“I’m sorry, but I was under the impression that it was the moon who controls the tides. I’m not saying you’re doing it on purpose. But deep down, you still think there’s a reason that you’re here. There’s a part of you that wants to live and find out. And I’m here to tell you.”

Y/n perks up at this, although there’s still tears welled in her eyes,”there’s no way you figured it out. You’re just saying that to try and stop me.”

“I don’t think you understand, y/n. Without you, the whole world would fall out of balance. You know of yin and yang, correct? Warm and cold. Light and dark. Day and night?”

“Yeah, I’ve read it all. What is your point here, Hoseok?”

“Love, you bring things that I could never provide. I could never move the tides. I could never shine among the stars like you do. I can never bring comfort during the dark like you. Don’t you understand? Everything shines the brightest when it is darkest. You are loved by so many. I may bring warmth and light. But you bring beauty, comfort, and understanding. Understanding that without the night, we would never cherish the beauty of the dark, and what lies in it. Darling, don’t you see? You are the one everyone truly loves. You bring light in the darkest of times. How can you not see that?”

Y/n looks as if Hoseok had just slapped her in the face, waves of tears making their way down her cheeks freely. She stumbles forward, almost drunkenly and blinded by her tears, and begins weakly beating on his chest.

“H-How can I believe you? I-I just . . . What if you’re just saying this because you love me?” she lets out an exasperated breath, finally looking up into his eyes.

“So what if I am? You don’t think those humans love you almost as much as I do? Or did you just forget everything that I said? That is the whole point, nightlight. Everyone on Earth loves you just as much as I do. You just needed someone else to tell you so that you’d finally believe it.”

Silence sweeps over the both of them as they breathe heavily, exhausted physically and emotionally.

“Look y/n, I-

Hoseok doesn’t get the chance to finish his sentence as the force of her body knocks into his, nearly knocking him over. Relief floods his body as he relaxes into her embrace, the sky growing lighter in time with his heart.

“Hoseok, I’m so sorry I said all of those things to you. I was just so . . . I am so scared,” she sniffles quietly.

He releases himself from y/n, looking down at her with a confused look,”Scared of what?”

“Of loving you. And everything that comes with it. But I, um, I think it’s much too late for that.”

Hoseok’s eyebrows shoot up, a beaming smile coming onto his face,”are you serious? You- you love me? You actually love me back?”

“I think there’s a better term for it, the humans use it to differentiate between platonic and romantic feelings. I don’t just love you, sunshine. I am in love with you.” Her hands come up and rest on his cheeks, his doing the same.

“Uh, I, is this where -”

“Oh my stars, just kiss me already you dork.”

The legend says that the upper beings were so pleased, the sun and moon were allowed to stay on their island together for the rest of eternity.

All was golden in the sky

All was golden when the day met the night.

The End

#bts x reader #bts imagines #bts drabble #jung hoseok x reader #hoseok x reader #taehyung x reader #jungkook x reader #jimin x reader #yoongi x reader #ot7 #jin x reader #namjoon x reader

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ambitionsource · 4 years ago

Note

i watch a lot of avatar the last bender and i gonna ask the question. which of the a class is a bender (water, earth, fire, and air) or a non bender? who do you think would be the avatar?

given that she has an atla url, you can imagine es was very excited to answer this question LOL. we decided we’d approach this from like the standpoint of if bending existed, but in the current setting and world as we know it (so not quite fixed in the atla world or lore). i made visual aids to go with it because i’m a visual person, but i’ll talk a bit through our thinking for each type!

water felt so obvious for riley she was one of the first people we decided on. she definitely has that katara-like energy for a waterbender where she’s gentle and practiced and quite fluid with her motions and her emotions, but she’ll also flip on a dime in an instant and kick your ass with water if you hurt anyone she cares about (which brings us to a necessary thought -- missy vs riley epic bending battle like katara v azula energy? would love to see it). for chai, we decided she would be water because it’s interesting to have a diva type who falls in a category that is represented by folks who aren’t at all divas, so it just adds an interesting variety to things. she’s also the direct opposite to maya as a rival in that sense (who we’ll come back to).

for charlie, both he and zay we thought a lot about how the movements of bending could be tied to dance and where their strengths lie. esther said that the fluid movement of water bending reminded her a lot of ballet / lyrical, and that made sense to me. it also ties together the similarities between riley and charlie in terms of their personalities, but i think where they differ is charlie would be someone who struggles a lot with his bending. i think you have to have a big sense of inner self and balance to bend proficiently, and as we know, charlie never feels on balance. i think he’d be victim to more overwhelming moments of bending when his emotions feel out of control, and for that reason he’d try really hard to avoid using it whenever possible. esther also pointed out the cool idea of he inherited a bit of this as well -- if the gardners are all water benders, but eleanor is very strict about them only using it for healing properties and Nothing Else, that kind of belief can constrict charlie’s ability as well and contribute to his fears. and perhaps the reason bridgette was exiled also has to do with her wanting to explore bending in a more well-rounded sense, so then she could be a mentor to charlie later... truly much to think about.

(also, again, i say... can we imagine the epic bending battle that could exist between brandon, charlie, and zay? charlie who is always underestimated and brushed aside and doesnt feel in control of his own power stepping up when zay starts to lose the upper hand in a bending face off and thus charlie comes into his own and jumps into to take on brandon too and its like yeah YOU THOUGHT HE WASN’T GONNA DO NOTHING. BUT THEN LOOK AT HIM GO. LOOK AT CHARLIE AND ZAY TAG TEAM. EXACTLy).

continuing under a read more because there’s evidently lots to say!

earth happened to be a crowded category for us though why i don’t know. i jokingly said that dave would be like the boulder but also he like... is basically a human brick, so it makes sense he’d have some earth roots. but i think dave uses his bending in a more silly / lowkey way, and has no ambitions to try and master it. he also is part of the quartet of bending in the techie boys that makes up the full element list (dave, nate, dylan, and jeff), which is kinda cool. zay we went with earth for because unlike charlie, the most key trait to his dance (and bending) is how firmly rooted and grounded he is -- he has faith in his own abilities, he’s balanced, one could even say he’s stubborn in how he sticks his ground. but this parallels well to dance as well where you need to have faith in even footing and knowing you’re going to land the right way and in the right position. esther also suggested that he would be one of the few who can lava bend, which kind of makes him this interesting near-intersection of earth and fire which i thought was super cool.

for isadora, we agreed she would be of the metal bending camp (and perhaps, in this world, is even the innovator of it) and is always trying to experiment with her earth-bending. we know she’s stubborn as hell and very firmly planted in her stances and opinions, but i think where she trips up is in the moments where she does feel unsure or kind of loses her footing (like with val or knowing how she wants to be perceived over s2), her bending no longer comes naturally and she almost loses it in those moments. so like over s3, in theory, as she’s grappling with grief you’d see her have to struggle to even get the basic bending capability back in decent shape as she’s also recovering emotionally. then for eric and harper, both of them to me have very stable, grounded energies, and i think they act acutely as mentors to isa and zay respectively.

most of these feel obvious, but maya is probably the most self-explanatory bender you can get here. she is like azula in a nutshell in terms of being showy, hot-headed, calculating, arrogant, etc... though she admittedly has more heart than azula. which is saying something. we thought of maya and asher as honestly sort of antithetical to one another, as asher on the flip side is terrified of his bending ability and thusly is almost a non-bender in that he never uses it. it flares up sometimes when his anxiety gets bad and so he freaks and tries to stifle it (almost like elsa with ice but. reverse lmao), and i also think there’s something really cool in the way of like... how breath is tied to bending (especially fire) but also tied to calming panic so there’s... something there. a thread to pull at. but essentially its kind of like zuko v azula where like if asher believed in himself and stepped up to his full potential he could 100% take on maya, but it’s his own insecurity, fear, and self-doubt that holds him back and keeps him all wrapped up. also, yindra v maya fiery bend-off when?

all four of these kiddos have air bender energy to me, but in different ways and for different reasons that i can’t even necessarily articulate. haley i think is very dreamy and somewhat flighty and so wouldn’t be very good with her bending abilities. yogi just has the like... air trickster energy. then you have nigel and dylan, who are kind of like polar opposite air benders. dylan is definitely in the class of aang where it’s like silly tricks, aid in helping him leap and flip and soar around, constantly showing off that marble party trick, goofing off with the other techie boyz and trying to teach them how to do air games, etc. it’s to the point where jade (a non-bender) is like air benders must be the most annoying type on earth do they ever RELAX? impossible to work with... and then she meets nigel, also an air bender, who is like the antithesis to that in that he’s calm, thoughtful, peace-making, almost overly cautious (in that same way aang is where indecision can be your greatest enemy) and jade is like... now that. that’s what i’m talking about.

back around to dylan, though, this brings us to our assertion that dylan would be the avatar. this is something we actually mused on ages ago together when doing atla rewatch (for maggie) / watches (for es), and he just has the perfect energy for it. he’s someone who brings people together, he’s a unifier and peacemaker, he has so much intrinsic hope and optimism... but he also can be too silly and naive and would have struggles here and there trying to learn different elements (both focus wise and generally). but he basically has a team avatar built in his usual core group, with riley (water), isa (earth), and asher (fire), not to mention his techie buddies who add to that.

i was also very excited about the thematic element of dylan being air and asher being fire, because what does fire need to survive? air. yeah, it’s poecy.

and there’s something interesting there too of like... you know, the reason aang didn’t want to learn fire bending anymore was after he accidentally burned katara, and i think that sort of thing is what asher is most afraid of -- especially if dylan eventually comes to him and claims he would be the perfect teacher to teach him fire bending which will be the hardest element for him to master. it’s like, if you’re already scared of your own ability to cause damage, how do you possibly risk that even slightly to try and pass it onto your most treasured loved one? you know? there’s just so much interesting fodder there.

anyone who has known me for a while should find lucas being a non-bender exactly 0% surprising. when it comes to magical or mystical concepts like this i nearly always give lucas the normie everyman role, because i feel like it is just so quintessential to his essence. even in aaa, actually, he kind of represents this role being the “untalented,” average person stuck at the performing arts school with people who are supremely talented. so you see the blueprint. he kind of makes up the sokka angle of the dylan-team-avatar arrangement, and he also falls under the guidance of jack who is a non-bender in the vein of that expert swordsman that sokka trains under. they have that kind of dynamic and energy to me (which brings us to our third point: jack v yancy epic battle with swords when?) i think there’s also something interesting to lucas and asher’s friendship if part of the reason they’re close is because asher stifles his own abilities so much to basically be on the same playing field as lucas, which makes him feel less alone... so how does that change if he does start exploring his bending in the effort to help dylan... much to think about.

jade, as previously mentioned, is just a very Tired non-bender being surrounded by her loud bender boys. darby and sarah, as non-benders, reinforce their theoretical subordination to the likes of maya and chai (though i support darby fighting back if she could just wile up the courage...) then we have farkle, who is in a very interesting place as a non-bender trying to elbow his way to the front of the pack amongst the likes of maya and zay. i think this inferiority complex would contribute to... you know, everything about him (especially s1) and would be exacerbated even further by the idea of him REALLY being the black sheep of his family if he’s the only non-bender in a family full of practiced and prestigious fire benders. we also felt like farkle would definitely be someone who dabbles and experiments in technology around bending, trying to replicate the thing he just doesn’t have.

-- Maggie & Es

#sorry this got long LOL #its funny you know i realized most of y'all have no idea the amount of aaa aus i have... like #au inception i know but... some of them y'all #like we gotta educate y'all on freefall. that shit is where its at #answered #a class #lucasmatthews #ask and you shall receive

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kbstories · 4 years ago

Text

impression//expression

"It’s not like Kirishima had come all this way to U.A. to immediately break the promise he made to himself upon arrival.

It’s just that Bakugou is as feral as they come, and the moment Kirishima recognizes it’s fear he felt crawling up his spine that day, he makes it his personal mission to face it head-on until it’s gone."

(Or: Being friends with Bakugou Katsuki is anything but a linear experience. Kirishima Eijirou would have it no other way.)

Tags: Kirishima POV, Developing Friendships, Protective Kiri, Soft Baku, Chatting

Chapter 1. No additional content warnings apply. Chapter 3. Chapter 4. Chapter 5. Chapter 6. Chapter 7. Chapter 8. Chapter 9.

***

The routine goes as follows:

Bakugou waits for Kirishima at the front door, arms crossed and a varying degree of pissed off depending how late he's running. Kirishima complains about the train being postponed or too full or delayed in some way – which is true, damn it, it’s like the universe has doomed his train line and none other in all of Japan to be the statistical outlier in an otherwise spotless record of punctuality – and begs for forgiveness, usually by bribing Bakugou with some post-workout coffee.

It works surprisingly well. A month into this and Kirishima is about ready to join one of those conspiracy theory servers Kaminari is so fond of because Bakugou is actually pretty lenient, death threats and crackling palms aside.

(That being said, Kirishima enjoys life and living and chasing after his dreams, so he will never breathe a word about that particular observation to anyone, least of all Bakugou himself.)

They usually got the gym to themselves, the employees on the early shift always looking vaguely relieved that at least someone is making use of their opening hours. Kirishima’s never been a regular anywhere aside from perhaps the manga store a few blocks from his home, so it feels a bit special to have this implicit claim to the training area made for heat-based quirks every Saturday morning.

Bakugou snorted when Kirishima told him that, muttering what sounded like fucking nerd under his breath.

The rest is pretty straight-forward. Kirishima’s been on a daily workout schedule for a good year by this point, and it’s clear Bakugou is used to it too. They stretch, do some warm-ups (in Bakugou’s case, quite literally) and off they go.

The thing is: It’s fun. Like, really, really fun. Really loud, too, especially when Bakugou’s got his sweat on and comes at him point-blank and flashy like fireworks personified. By the first session, Kirishima already realized it’s a lost cause trying to talk during training because all Bakugou replies with is an exasperated “Hah?!” no matter what he says.

It’s not like Kirishima could’ve heard himself speak anyways, his ears always left ringing something fierce from all the close-quarter explosions. Bakugou is a stranger to the concept of holding back or taking things by half measures, that much hasn’t changed.

Elsewhere, it might’ve taken a while for Kirishima to push his quirk to the point where his skin breaks out in cracks and ridges, his arms and shoulders and hair turning unyielding and clear-cut like miniature mountains. Not here, though: Not when the choices are to put his best foot forward with every move, or have Bakugou tear his throat out for daring to waste his time. There’s something so freeing about letting loose like that – a thrill that sends Kirishima’s heart on a war path and his pulse soaring until all that’s left are his instincts and quick reflexes.

Like this, every time he gets a hit in or a blast manages to leave a mark on his body, Bakugou grins and Kirishima grins back. Like this, the bruises and lost hours of sleep pale in comparison to just how bright Bakugou’s eyes can shine.

Kirishima brushes off the last traces of carbon dust off his arms to start massaging the sore muscles there. With U.A.’s Sports Festival a mere handful of days away, both of them kept going until their quirks started to sputter.

A strange comfort, to sit in mutual exhaustion like this. It’s not even noon but Kirishima could totally go for a nap, right there on the black, fire-proof tiles. Leaning back on his hands, he hums and asks:

“So. What’s the deal with Midoriya?”

A few feet from him, Bakugou pauses in rolling his shoulders. The black tank top he’s wearing is positively plastered to his body with sweat, his track pants saved from the same fate by how bulky they are.

“What?”

Too late, it occurs to Kirishima to feel nervous. The sensation is dim against the warmth still clinging to his skin though, that minute ache that comes with becoming stone for too long. “Being around him pisses you off. What’s up with that?”

Bakugou stares at him. His expression is hard to read, firmly within the realm of his default frown. “The fuck, Shitty Hair. What’s it to you?”

Uh oh. Kirishima sits up, mostly to raise his hands in a placating gesture, palm-up. “Just curious, bro. Honest. Been wondering for a while so I thought I’d ask, y’know?”

As bold as Kirishima aims to be, lying Bakugou in the face when his gaze is sharp enough to cut a bitch would be a monumentally stupid move. Bakugou seems to come to the same conclusion, even if his scoff is plenty aggressive.

“None of your fucking business, that’s what’s up with it. Fucking… Deku, bah.”

To say the silence that follows is loaded is the understatement of the century. Kirishima chews on his tongue, about a thousand questions balancing on its tip; it’s like the Midoriya he sees is the polar opposite of the one Bakugou blows a fuse over on a regular basis, and the why behind it is kind of starting to haunt him. (It doesn’t help that everyone in 1-A treats him as some sort of expert in all things Bakugou instead of interacting with the guy directly.)

One glance at Bakugou and he swallows it all down. Only now, with any and all traces of it gone, does Kirishima realize how calm he had looked. “…Coffee?”

Bakugou picks himself off the ground and leaves without another word.

Baku 💣💥

it’s bullshit dude (sent 18:23)

u know that right? (sent 18:23)

right? (sent 18:48)

like the whole chains + muzzle thing was ass i’m still fuming (sent 19:10)

and the press can go duck themselves lol (sent 19:12)

fuck** (sent 19:12)

it’s ur right to refuse the thing if u don’t want it (sent 19:15)

idk man it just sucks (sent 19:20)

baku? (sent 19:35)

:( (sent 19:55)

i know (received 19:56)

stop blowing up my phone (received 19:57)

baku!! ❤️ (sent 19:57)

sry haha (sent 19:57)

u ok tho? (sent 20:00)

fuck off (received 20:01)

sry sry (sent 20:01)

(my moms say hi btw 💪🏻💪🏻) (sent 20:32)

((and congrats but i told em u don’t wanna hear it lmao)) (sent 20:33)

hi back (received 20:40)

💪🏻 (sent 20:42)

Lord Explosion Murder?? (Baku 💣💥 )

so like (sent 6:20)

ur hero name (sent 6:20)

? (received 6:21)

oh! morning lol (sent 6:22)

ok so. it’s a bit of a mouthful (sent 6:24)

manly! (sent 6:24)

but y’know (sent 6:24)

k (received 6:25)

what about nitro? or smth (sent 6:30)

it’s snappy and cool! like u hehe (sent 6:33)

WAIT NO (sent 6:33)

LIKE (sent 6:33)

UM (sent 6:34)

kirishima (received 6:34)

yea? (sent 6:34)

OH SHIT DID U JUST (sent 6:36)

pls don’t kill me (sent 6:36)

bro? (sent 6:40)

bakubro? (sent 6:48)

nitro? 👀 (sent 6:53)

… (sent 6:57)

at least lemme say bye to my dog man (sent 7:00)

no (received 7:00)

RIP in pieces me (sent 7:00)

Nitro!! (Baku 💣💥 )

oi dipshit (received 8:02)

?? 👀 (sent 8:02)

you owe me coffee (received 8:03)

!!! (sent 8:03)

[train_view.jpg] (sent 8:18)

omw 💪🏻 (sent 8:19)

k (received 8:19)

>>Chapter 3

#my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bnha #mha #kiribaku #kirishima eijirou #bakugou katsuki #bnha fanfiction #kiri is braver than any marine: the fic #(let's hope tumblr doesn't kill the formatting on this one)#this fic is also on AO3!!#my stuff

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teashadephoenix · 4 years ago

Text

Okay so I tried to finish this yesterday before I crashed for a nap, but I am old and weak so here it is.

Lucifer Season 5A overall thoughts!

SPOILERS!

-i called it. I knew if they opened with Mr Said Out Bitch it was gonna be bc he was dead-- had to be, bc Lucifer was in Hell. Didnt like being right. Thanks for heaping a bunch of character development on a great bit of comic relief just so he can be dead.

-not enough Trixie. What the fuck. Is this a Chandler Riggs situation? Can Scarlett not act or something? Give her stuff to do please.

-EIGHT EPISODES AND NO SINGING LUCIFER???? GODDAMN BLASPHEMY

-i get why people are frustrated with how Maze is written bc it seems like she never does anything but go back and forth but I mean... that's just the writing across the board for this series. Lucifer, Chloe, and Dan have all flipflopped as the seasons progress-- character growth is handled the way real people are, with relapses in bad behavior and having to reiterate lessons more than once. Unusual for television writing, which usually addresses an idea once and then fucks off it forever.

-That said, I enjoyed Maze's arc of dealing with abandonment and seeking a soul. It made sense and was in character-- Lesley played Maze like she felt utterly lost, near madness from frustration, seeking comfort the way she best knows (sex and violence) from the people she loves and not knowing what to do when it wasn't working. I hate that she's so easily manipulated but I feel like it really is bc she wants to feel normal so badly and doesnt realise that normal is relative.

-tangentially, Lilith did not play as big a part as I expected and i was sort of disappointed.

-I wonder if the ring will now be used to pass lilith's immortality to someone who needs it?

-Tom Ellis' performance as Michael was v good as I previously said, but the entire concept of him was nothing inspired. I really had high hopes for him bc I love twins and especially twins who are like the bane of each other's existence but ffs they didn't do anything with it! So he's the polar opposite of his brother, so what! He's a wicked little American hunchback who lies and schemes and plays on people's fears... why? To what end? His plan kept changing and his entire motivation seems to be "bc I'm a dick." Boring. And he dresses like a twat.

-Lucifer was not stuck in Hell for remotely a long enough time. I am an angstwhore and I wanted pining. The same fucking thing happened when they made Dean a demon on SPN-- oh no we've had a decent idea and gotten our hero up the tree, now let's do absolutely nothing with it and get him back down aqap! Fuck off. They gave us this difficult, interesting situation to work with (how can Lucifer have a relationship if he has to run Hell) and then the moment he came up for the tiniest amount of time, Hell apparently no longer needs a warden! Srsly? When only two months ago, all hell was breaking loose???? Fuck your fucking convenient handwave.

-also I am sad they dropped the hinted mental/emotional toll on Lucifer for having to return to Hell Granted the article is a year old, likely discussing ideas that were in the infancy, but I was looking forward to seeing the "alcoholic running a liquor store." Obviously once they decided they were doing Michael-playing-Lucifer and summarily realised nobody would believe Lucifer changed that much, it was easier to just come straight out and say "yea thats not him, thats the evil twin."

-Amenadiel is lovely as ever. Charming, funny, the perfect mix of earnest and awkward. DB Woodside nails him and I love him. I love his friendships with Dan and Maze, the big brother instinct he gets with Luci and Chloe. He's a big black dude whose primary role is caretaker and I am here for it.

-Nice to see happy funny Dan back after taking a bereavement sabbatical in s4. I like Kevin Alejandro's performance a lot and so I dont like when Dan's being a dickhead bc it makes me wanna smack him. Loved him reading Diablo scenes w Luci-- reminded me of s2 when they were dorking out about the Weaponizer movies. And the cemetery scene, wow. Dan realising Heaven and Hell are real and that he is in danger of damnation and how bad that scares him-- ow my heart. That having been said...

-I didnt really like characters having these massive bombshells dropped on them just bc Michael is a douche-- that's so lazy. It felt like the writers ticking off checkboxes. Okay so he tells Chloe she's a miracle. That's fine I guess-- there are stakes there. We know it's going to rock her world bc we know how much it damaged Lucifer when he found out. But then he orchestrates Dan finding out and apart from the shock factor... who cares? It matters after, but not before. There was no set-up for that punchline. We knew when Linda pushed Lucifer to "drop the metaphor" that it was going to be a biblical shock for her. We knew what a relief it was going to be for Charlotte, who thought she was losing her mind, to learn that Hell was real and she could change her fate. We knew it was a gamechanger when Chloe found out. And that's why Dan gets the fuck over it super fast, bc it doesn't matter. It was just a box to be checked. Boo.

-it was nice getting to see Tricia Helfer bc I adore that woman but i really do hope that we get to see Charlotte properly again. Take me to the silver city already i am sick of not knowing what it looks like.

-i love Linda to bits. She's funny, she's heartwarming, she's the owner of the single braincell and she and Ella occasionally share it while they watch the others try to bite their own elbows.

6/10

s4 > s2 > s5A = s1 = s3

#lucifer s5 spoilers #lucifer s5 #lucifer spoilers #lucifer #season breakdown

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high5nerd · 5 years ago

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Vorfreude

Aay, my first (at the time) Pitch x Reader one-shot!

Don’t fook your professors, folks.

“When understanding the root words of our modern day languages, it can be daunting to fully comprehend the detail such a language as English can be intertwined with a multitude of other languages long forgotten,”

Dr. Pitchiner was certainly entrancing when he spoke at the podium, flourishing a hand at the list of most common prefixes and suffixes used in today’s modern English, along with a surprise list of obscure ones you knew you had to take note on. Dr. Pitchiner wasn’t one to give easy exams, the last exam was so gruelling someone almost passed out from a panic attack at the multitude of pages.

Despite enjoying writing yourself, you weren’t as invested in English as he was, which was a given, hence the reason his PhD in English as well as a degree in Latin Translation. Many times he’s journeyed to Italy to help assist scholars in finding new information on the lost civilizations of Rome, Sicily, and Pompeii, and that credit alone was the sole reason he got the job at this state college. He should have been employed at universities like Harvard or Yale, or even Oxford or Princeton, but yet here he was, teaching at your simple state college with an acceptance rate of 93% and the highest transferring stat in all of your state.

Not a lot of students found him attractive like you did. Certainly there was more than a couple handfuls of girls, pockets of them, who’ve admired his lithe figure, his graceful movements and that firm ass that was way too snug in his black slacks. Most of them admired his physique from afar, some even daring others to get closer to flirt with him shamelessly, and usually that ended up with a bad memory for the attempted action, as well as the girl who tried to drop the class out of utter embarrassment at such a call out after class that could be heard around the hall.

Dr. Kozmotis Pitchiner took no bullshit from anyone, and that’s the main reason your heart fluttered at the thought and sight of him. This class wasn’t the first time you two had met face to face either, shockingly. Quite hilariously, the first time you two met, you didn’t even like him.

Three years ago, you were an itty bitty freshman just like the ones that recently arrived this semester, and to the best of your luck, you scored almost five hours of total free time on Mondays and Wednesdays before your Intro to Biology class and Intro to Psychology course after lunch.

Why not explore the gorgeous campus during those five hours? It would get you more acquainted with your surroundings and in small cases, make new friends! Grabbing a can of fruit juice and a danish from the dining hall, you munched as you explored the massive quad before discovering where the art gallery was, venturing towards the art and theatre buildings you’d be in the next year for your art perspective requirements. You found yourself meandering in the photograph-covered walled hallway of the English department, unknowingly headed towards the campus’s own local newspaper headquarters when a voice startled you from your entrancement with your journey.

“Hey. Where do you think you’re going?” a voice matching the texture of velvet came.

You turn around, frowning at the sudden startling noise. There just feet away from you, emerged from his office was a man dressed in what you would consider funeral appropriate attire, a smooth black suit with a basic black tie, and shiny black dress shoes that looked like they could reflect sunlight and somehow cause a car accident if he walked outside.

“I’m exploring. Where do you think you’re going?” you shot back, taking a long sip of your fruit juice.

You were mildly surprised to see a smirk cross his devious lips, his silver-gold eyes narrowing at your sass. He almost looked amused at your attitude, even enough so that his tensed shoulders relaxed, but his arms still remained folded over his chest.

“At the moment, I’m going wherever you think you’re headed, which should be in the opposite direction you’re headed.”

Ooh, he likes playing word games. You took another sip and then took a big bite of your danish, not caring about how childish you were coming off to him. You pointed towards the hallway, “Why can’t I go down there?”

He gestured his head in the same direction, “It’s merely copy rooms and computer labs meant for the Daily Mascot Oracle. Nothing worth checking out.”

“Oh. That’s a shit title.” you commented.

He barked out a heartwarming laugh. You grin at him, glad he finally was capable of taking that stick out of his ass and be a decent human being. Almost three times so far in just two days you got two people to really dislike your presence and your sassy attitude, someone named Bunnymund and another elfish looking kid named Jack who’s definition of fun didn’t match yours at all.

“I certainly didn’t agree to it either, but the editor in chief made sure my vote was outnumbered,” he hesitated, thinking quickly before glancing at you, “Are you a freshman?”

You nodded, knowing what he would ask next, “Majoring in psychology with hopefully a minor in alternative medicine and therapy.”

He looked genuinely impressed, “I must say, it’s quite refreshing to have a new student under that field. Not a lot of freshmen choose that whilst entering for their first year. What makes you like that field of study so much?”

You shrugged with a smile, “I like the whole concept of the human mind and how it functions on an emotional state. It’s interesting how certain actions and emotions can create feelings inside us, and I especially love the study of dreams and fears and hopes. I want to do a project on dream therapy for my senior thesis when it comes time to that, but I doubt they’ll let me. Professor Oren didn’t like hearing me say that at orientation.”

Dr. Pitchiner nodded, “Oren doesn’t really believe in the science behind dreams, and certainly not the spirituality behind it if you believe in that sort of thing. I certainly do.”

“You do?” you were genuinely surprised, literally taken aback. You wouldn’t have considered such an eloquent, smooth and finely dressed man to believe in a spirituality. He reeked of realist to you, you certainly weren’t expecting that.

He nodded again, “Of course. It’s only natural for the human psyche to become understandable to a certain degree, and it’s been proven through many other cultures that such things exist, like the sixth sense or empathy or precognition. Why not in dream analyzation? It’s fascinating, I’m glad you’re interested in it. If I wasn’t an English professor I would immediately return to college to take advantage of that.”

That’s when you realized how gold his eyes were, how they sparkled like the richest coins ever discovered in the vastness of the sunken world of ships at the bottom of the ocean. His eyes gave away intense wisdom, feeling and intellect that you felt the need to learn from. You needed to unlock every part of him to see beyond that gaze he gave you with that strange upturn at the corner of his devilish mouth.

Sure enough, you eventually found yourself in his class a couple years later for your required English Analysis course, and the both of you took advantage of that. You found yourself wandering back to his office between classes and office hours, knowing full well no one visited him nor had the courage to due to his harshness in class and strict code he sticks to in not forming attachments to the student body. For you, somehow you were able to break that barrier and see a different kind of man than what people upfront knew him as.

Your friend Katherine is your first and only senior friend at the university, and from her story when you signed up for his course at the beginning of the year, he was known to be callous and strict, such a polar opposite to leniency that even if you were sick with proof of illness, he wouldn’t accept that as an excused absence unless you flourished a medical note from a doctor to him. Everyone feared him, but admired him from afar since he’s the only professor to actually cut down on the bullshitters and slackers in class, and is one of the most respected professors there because of his adventures in Italy as a historian as well as a translator.

You, however, knew him as a sarcastic, good humored intellect with an avid thirst for learning the unknown, and unlocking skills he’s never attempted. From the times you would visit his office or bump into each other in the hallways and have small talk, you learned that at one point in his life he was just as brash, brazen and impulsive as you are now. Before he considered becoming a professor, he was eager to study what you were studying in now, especially the study of phobias and humans’ reactions to certain fear-triggering events or objects. You were the only one that’s ever heard him snort at a god-awful joke you would attempt at, and the only one that’s ever seen him grin at you in such a way it made your stomach flip and flutter.

Perhaps you exposed yourself too much to him, or perhaps he was just so relatable you felt like you sometimes felt like you were talking to a part of yourself you’ve never discovered before. It slightly scared you how much he knew about you and it wasn’t even the end of the fall semester, but you trusted him in ways you’ve never trusted another before. He always promised you absolute confidentiality with your confessions to him, most out of pure merriment and in the goal of a strengthened friendship, like when you told him when you were fourteen you tried blending into the popular clique but still found yourself drawn to the nerds and theater kids once more. He once gave you such a dubious smirk at the notion of you once being the stereotypical geek, with what you claimed to be the unattractive flat hair, braces and awkward gait.

“I can hardly believe that of you.” he chuckled.

“Why? You can kinda tell, don’t lie.” you winked teasingly.

He tilted his head in his hand at you, looking your figure up and down so slowly and languidly that it made your face heat up with a sudden thrill you haven’t felt in a long time.

“Whoever you were before has grew into a fine young woman, that’s most of what I can see.” he looked at you seriously, his eyes hard with truth.

Ever since that you realized that the idea of him being closer than what you two already were was something else you wanted. You thirsted for it, like an obsession. Unhealthy, you weren’t sure, but you were careful not to give yourself away to him, in fear that it would destroy that friendship you two already had. Without anyone’s knowledge but his, you both called each other by your first names. You called him Koz, and he called you by the nickname you wanted him to call you.

Even just watching him write on the board, hearing his voice wrap you lovingly in it’s deep musical tones made your legs tighten in excitement. You furrowed your brows, trying to ignore the incoming thoughts of his voice saying your name like a mantra as you wrote down everything being scribbled on the board.

The guy next to you noticed your discomfort, and nudged his elbow with yours. You looked at him, affronted, “What?”

“You look pissed. You okay?” he looked suspicious.

“Shut up, I’m fine.”

“(y/n).”

Your blood froze, looking up at him in pure fear at being called out in front of class. His hands were folded behind his back, his eyes lingering on you and only you. The class stared at you, nearly a thousand eyes focused on your nervous leg bouncing and the pen in your hand being crushed by the amount of attention drawn onto you.

“I see you have already started to discuss with Stephen,” you could swear to the moon above he smirked ruefully, “Would you like to tell us what the definition of vorfreude is?”

You gulped quickly before looking down at your paper, noticing that the last couple notes were not even notes, they were sinful descriptions of what you wanted him to do to your mouth and in between your thighs. Your face grew incredibly red to the point it prickled your skin as you stood up. You never broke eye contact with him. You can’t be weak now.

“Vorfreude is a German word to define a type of intense anticipation of imagining future pleasures.”

He nodded, his smirk subsiding to something even darker at the moment you uttered the word ‘future’, “Excellent. Glad to see you’re still paying attention despite your distractions.”

Some people snickered at your red face deepening in color as you plopped back down in your seat. By now Koz was shuffling the exams collected last week, freshly graded and corrections that could leave someone in tears if not taken lightly.

As he passed around the graded exams going over the class’s weak points and what to look forward to for the next midterm, you doodled a bit more in your notebook and wrote more lines of absolute sin into a poetic verse, something E. E. Cummings would be absolutely proud of.

You read over your lines, admiring the visual rhymes as well as the absolute clear imagery of being locked into him, his arms like a vice as he would pull your hair and bite at the sensitive parts of your neck, and even now you squirmed at the daydream of such a carnal act going on in his office. More than anything, more than just impressing him with your knowledge and sharp tongue would be for him to pin you to the desk and make you cry out his name in ecstasy as your legs would quiver with release. You bit your lip as you tightened your grip on your sweatshirt, trying your damn hardest not to accidentally make a noise.

That’s when you noticed the shadow lurking over you.

You froze. Your entire body became still with horror and your blood turned cold as Koz read over your carnal poem and observed your lewd doodles with a casual eye as he handed you your exam. You reached out for it with a shaking hand and slowly placed it over the notebook page, knowing it was too late to hide the damage.

“Please see me after class about your note-taking.”

You nodded, trying to fight tears from the utter embarrassment as he finished handing out the exams. You close your notebook in disgust with yourself. Koz continues the class until 5:45, the usual time it ends when everyone wastes no time in dilly dallying and immediately leaving, most if not all heading to the dining hall for dinner. You, planning to indulge in just a minor dinner consisting of cereal or soup out of embarrassment and sadness, packed up slowly.

“(y/n), a word please.” he beckoned from his podium.

You refused to look at him as you stepped down from the lecture hall stairs to the podium, your backpack slung over your shoulder and your confidence crumbling even further as you waited with baited breath as he finished shutting off the projector and computer.

“You have quite a knack for poetry for someone who says English isn’t their forte, as well as for a psychology major.” he calmly noted, hardly glancing at you.

You couldn’t help it, you couldn’t hold it in anymore and let it burst from your chest, all your thoughts jumbled into a single rambling mess, “I swear I didn’t intend for you to see it, I just-I just-I don’t know why I did that and I know I messed up our friendship, it’s all my fault and I’m really really sorry, I seriously wasn’t thinking and I just can’t help but feel these things and it just makes it worse when I think about you, I don’t know what to do about it-”

A hand crept around the back of your neck and forced your head up, and without even a single warning you felt warm, wet lips enveloping yours, biting sweetly as well as fervently. You couldn’t help but make a noise of startlement at the sudden action, but before you could even have time to melt into the kiss, he pulled away, a smirk on his face.

“It’d be inappropriate for me to do such things, but more inappropriate for you to act on it as well. Yet, I know you are wise enough to not pursue it like you want to.” he stated, his eyes resembling molten gold.

Your gaze flattened, “Koz, what the fuck was that if you say you’re not ‘pursuing it’.”

He grinned, “Your confirmation of your feelings, as well as a promise of patience.”

“Patience?”

He smirked again, tilting his head and embracing the feel of superiority again, “You have nearly one more year left. I wonder if you have the patience to stick it out-”

That pissed you off. You grabbed his black tie and pulled him down, startling him as you kissed him hard. You pulled away just as quickly, enjoying the look of surprise on his face as well as slight bewilderment at being cut off from gloating.

You smiled innocently, smoothing down his tie as well as the front of his jacket, “Nice to know I’m not the only one enjoying the feeling of vorfreude from now on. Have a good day, Professor.”

Without a second backwards glance, you confidently strode out of the lecture hall, leaving Koz impressed as well as out of breath at your grand exit. He didn’t realize he’d be aching for you just as much as you ached for him.

It’s only a year, right? Not too long…

Boy were you two wrong.

#pitch black #pitch black x reader #reader insert #fanfiction #fanfics #fanfic commissions #fanfiction commissions #rise of the guardians #rise of the guardian fanfics #university au

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charminglatina · 5 years ago

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The Biorhythm Compatibility Ratings Between Popular TV & Movie Couples & Their Actors! (Part 2).🌹

In case you are wondering what Biorhythm Compatibility is, it’s a scientific test or analysis that discovers the true compatibility and chemistry between two people, usually between a romantic couple. However, biorhythm compatibility can be used for friendships, family relationships, co workers/business partners, pets, and enemies. The biorhythm compatibility between two people is based on two people’s full date of birth (DD/MM/YYYY). There’s a percentage rating system that determines how compatible a couple is. There are three different categories within a Primary Biorhythm Love Match Compatibility test. These include Physical Compatibility, Emotional Compatibility, and Intellectual Compatibility. First, there is Physical Compatibility which focuses on sexual compatibility, physical compatibility, sexual desire, lust, and the level of passion that exists between a romantic couple. Second, there is Emotional Compatibility which focuses on emotions, feelings, moods, sensitivity, romantic feelings, compassion, empathy, and general intensity of an emotional connection between a romantic couple. The Emotional Compatibility category is arguably the most critical and important component in regards to romantic compatibility between two people in this test next to the Spiritual Compatibility rating (which is the primary purpose of this post and I will explain this later on). Finally, there is Intellectual Compatibility which focuses on mental and verbal communication between a romantic couple, intellectual and mental stimulation, analytical thinking, logical thinking, decision making, learning ability, and mental understanding between a romantic couple. My last rating post focused on the Physical, Emotional, Intellectual and Overall Compatibility Ratings. However, did you know that there is a Secondary Biorhythm Love Match Compatibility Test which focuses on another four separate categories? These four categories in the Secondary Biorhythm Love Match Compatibility Test include Spiritual Compatibility, Awareness Compatibility, Intuitive Compatibility, and Aesthetic Compatibility. Let me explain what each of these four categories in a Biorhythm Love Match Compatibility Test represents. First, there is Spiritual Compatibility – focuses on the spiritual connection and bond, the telepathic and emphatic connection between two people, and the degree of unconditional love, selflessness, harmony and peace between a romantic couple. Second, there is Awareness Compatibility –focuses on the learning ability between two people, cognition compatibility, and the ‘sixth sense’ between a couple. Third, there is Intuition Compatibility–focuses on the instincts and unconscious perception between a romantic couple. Finally, there is Aesthetic Compatibility–focuses on the appreciation for aesthetics and beauty, the understanding of creativity and the arts, and the creative compatibility between a romantic couple.

The first thing, the most important thing is to know who you are, and how you connect to people. Are you the type of person that wants to have fun, a good time, go dancing, shopping, sit around and chat, the human contact type? Or are you the person that likes to go for hikes, go biking, diving, flying, sailing, skiing, the active kind? Or do you prefer to have intellectually stimulating conversations with intellectual or philosophical people, the intellectual kind? Of course, most of us are a combination of all of those things to varying degrees. Once you have determined who you are, and what you look for in a relationship, it is quite easy to find people that are compatible in this regard, be it physical, emotional, or intellectual. Also keep in mind that we need different things at different times. Problems in friendship appear when you try to take people from one crowd, and you try to bring them into another one where you are simply mismatched. That’s when the ‘you never want to have fun’ or the ‘we can never talk’ accusations happen. Yes, these people want to have fun, and they want to talk, but now when you want to, and you don’t want to when they want to. So, to sum it all up, don’t try to make your friends something they are not capable of, accept people for who and what they are, and concentrate on what your are compatible on. Rather, have several groups of friends and spend time with each group depending on your current needs and wants. Life will be much better this way. To further the concepts of the Biorhythms and Friendship concepts, we now move into a closer relationship of two individuals in terms of Love and Romance, and why some people get along and others don’t. Physical attraction is usually what opens the door, but what happens once you get into the room is dependent on compatibility. Physical attraction (i.e. looks) will work for the first date, but whether dating will continue depends entirely on how much these people have in common. Alternatively, if physical attraction is not part of the original intent, having spent some time with a person that is very compatible can nonetheless lead to a good long term relationship, and even Love and Romance. In order for Love and Romance to flourish in a relationship, the most important biorhythm to be compatible is the emotional cycle. To be in the same ‘mood’ is very important for any relationship to last. High compatibility in the physical biorhythmic cycle is no doubt a powerful ingredient, and you might have the time of your life for the first little while, but Lust alone cannot sustain a relationship. A physical cycle compatibility, which is in effect lust, only carries you so far. Eventually you need to talk. Eventually you need to feel. Eventually, you need to connect, so if there is nothing but physical compatibility, it will not last. There are people who have bounced from partner to partner to partner, focusing only on the physical compatibility component, and then wondering why they can never find somebody permanent, something that lasts for the long run. Love and Romance is not the physical biorhythm compatibility, and it is not the intellectual biorhythm compatibility, although both are very good and important to have to back up the romantic relationship. Love and Romance is the emotional cycle compatibility. Over time, an Biorhythm emotional mismatch will always manifest itself in the same way: “You never want to have fun.” But this is not the case. They just don’t want to have fun when you want to have fun, and they don’t want to be down and depressed when you what to be down and depressed. There is no perfect shoe and there is no perfect foot, there is only a perfect shoe for a certain foot. So if the slipper doesn’t fit, chances are this is not your Cinderella or Prince Charming. So, as an exercise to more successful dating and more love and romance, use Biorhythm Compatibility, and start scanning people for whether your biorhythms are compatible, and more importantly, which ones. Life is too short to keep dating the wrong type of person. Finally we move from Friendship and Love and Romance to Marriage, the quintessential long term relationship.

What can be expected from the relationship of two people with different Biorhythm when they come together in a social or business relationship? The purpose of the Bio-Compatibility Analysis is to explore this situation. Forewarned can be forearmed. Is what you feel for that other person really love? We have been so distorted by our upbringing that we might not know who would be right for us. We are taught that we should love everyone. You attract opposites if you do not like yourself or if you have a need to suffer or if you were conditioned wrongly by being raised with people who are not like you. You can now find the love of your life. No need to settle for less. If you have been getting involved with people who make you unhappy, you can see what you are doing and correct it. You are on your way to greater happiness. Do not be afraid of it. You can learn to live with yourself; to accept yourself and others, too. Don’t fight it. You are what you are. There are people who will love you because you are you. At least 50% is needed IN EACH AREA of Bio-Compatibility (Physical-Mental-Emotional) for two people to be happy together without much friction. If you have an area of compatibility below 50-60%, it means there will definitely be friction in that area. The relationship will only work if both of you compromise equally. It may also work if one of you willingly becomes the giver and the other becomes the taker. Any action short of these two options will most likely result in a relationship termination. This termination will be a difficult decision for both of you, especially if you have a high Emotional (Love) percentage compatibility, but it will be for the long-term benefit of your individual personal growth. If your average compatibility is between 0% and 40%, it means you have low compatibility, but high polarity. Your high polarity will cause much stress but it will have the effect of balancing each other so that your risk factor becomes low as long as you are willing to give the other person much space to be who they are. Jealousy or fear easily arises in this type of compatibility and can be extremely detrimental to this relationship. High polarity is better for business relationships than it is for social relationships. A commitment to unconditional love for the other person is what is needed to insure the relationship. Accomplish this and you have the key to a fulfilling relationship. Every biorhythmic category has its own sphere of influence when it comes to harmony, disharmony, incompatibility and compatibility. The harmony or disharmony of certain biorhythms also affect relationships between people. The intellectual biorhythm can, under certain conditions, be called male or masculine biorhythms because its disharmony has a strongly negative influence on the stronger sex’s overall conduct and produces to constant discomfort, unsociability and a lack of self-esteem. All of these factors can be “successively” altered by alcohol or by cheating with another woman. This is one of the reasons for drunkenness and alcoholism among men. Disharmonious intellectual rhythms within a romantic relationship or romance can have a negative effect on the partners’ professional sphere and hinder their creative work and self-realization. On the other hand, harmonious intellectual biorhythms between individuals in a relationship gives us self-confidence and stability and they give rise to new ideas, professional self-improvement and self-development. Without the intellectual stimulation within a marriage or a relationship, a man will seek asylum in self destructive attitudes and behaviours including infidelity, gambling, partying, pornography, addictive hobbies, drug abuse, and alcoholism. The emotional biorhythms are considered to be more female or feminine biorhythms. So, their harmony influences the fairer sex more strongly but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have a strong influence on men and how they act and behave within a marriage or relationship with women. Disharmonious emotional rhythms between a man and a woman in a romantic relationship and marriage mean loss of attractiveness, apathy about life, loss of empathy for others, imbalance, irritation and constant inner turmoil and distress, as well as dissatisfaction with life in general and tastelessness of food. Such moments are like “death” for men and especially women. Harmonious emotional biorhythms with a male partner are the main thing which women aspire to achieve. It is the mystery of their heart. There are a lot of things, without which she could be content, but she can’t live without harmonious emotional biorhythms (read “love”) with a mate. Any woman can find something positive in a criminal, whose emotional biorhythms are harmonious. A similar situation can be observed with harmonious intellectual rhythms, but it is more energy dependent than feelings and emotions. Finally, the physical biorhythms are responsible for health and sexual affairs. Disharmonious physical biorhythms between a man and a woman in a relationship and marriage mean, first of all, sexual dissatisfaction and lack of sexual interest with their mate. The principles of Indian techniques or “Viagra” are helpless, the bodies of the man and the woman have a different vibration and sexual energy that’s incompatible. Its results are infrequent sexual contact or the complete absence such sexual relations or even extramarital relations (in other words, cheating or infidelity). A disharmony of physical biorhythms can lead to different illnesses (and to weaker organisms, as a rule). Treatment gives only a temporary effect. The easiest way to stop a deluge of physical disharmonious biorhythms is to sleep in different beds. A harmony of physical biorhythms between two people gives the greatest sexual pleasure and orgasms. If we don’t restrict ourselves just to animal-like sex and develop human mutual relations, we can achieve unusual depths to cosmic heights. Sexotherapeutics gives the possibility of getting rid of various illnesses and diseases.

Is the love between a romantic couple so enigmatic and mysterious? While analyzing biorhythmical compatibility, we can get a new point of view on mutual relations between people and appreciate them in another way. A certain scheme of relations is created, seemingly a range of reciprocal relations. It is practically impossible to overcome this no matter how hard they try or want to. There are nine possible combinations of the three biorhythmic categories in a range of reciprocal relations. Let us examine them: All three biorhythms are disharmonious or incompatible (0% to 40%): There is no real family life or marriage with these kinds of biorhythmic compatibility ratings. The cause of marriage is an outward attractiveness, pure lust or sex, mental advantage, duty or just habit. Some feelings which appear at the beginning of relations are lost during the course of time. When the love is gone, leaving no children or bo common property, the marriage is absolutely destroyed. Otherwise, the married couple is just a financial-material unity or a business venture. They are energetic vampires to one another, who coexist in one house and abuse and torment each other and their children. Only physical biorhythms are harmonious or compatible: The situation is similar to the previous one where there are two disharmonious biorhythm between two people. The marriage will be filled with much turmoil and destructiveness. Eventually, the relationship with deteriorate due to a lack of feeling and love between the partners. But here, a physical bent and sexual satisfaction keeps the family from being completely destroyed unlike the first example. But the marriage or relationship can’t be salvaged with the help of sex alone… a spiritual warmth, a feeling of love and emotion, and mutual understanding between the two involved in the marriage are also strongly necessary. Since this couple lacks the harmonious emotional and intellectual biorhythms, this is a marriage that will likely end up being seriously shallow, abusive, or end up in divorce. Though the man will be sexually satisfied by his female partner, he will still likely commit infidelity because he is not achieving satisfaction in the emotional or intellectual biorhythms. Only emotional biorhythms are harmonious or compatible: With this scenario, there is something like love, especially from the woman’s point of view. A great feeling of love appears from the very first acquaintance or from the first time a man and a woman meet each other. But over the course of time, the man’s feeling towards the woman can grow cold, distant, aloof and frigid towards the woman. Intimate relations don’t give any sense of joy or happiness. Their love becomes broken. It’s a real tragedy, especially for the woman in the relationship. She can’t reconcile herself with it. She is ready to do anything to bring her male lover back, and then live at his expense, doing nothing in return. Without the harmonious physical biorhythm with a female partner, the emotional relationship with his female partner feels sexually empty. There’s no passion or desire on the man’s behalf towards the woman. Because of this, the man may commit physical or sexual infidelity to satisfy his sexual needs. And if there is no intellectual biorhythm harmony between a man and a woman, the man is likely to drown himself in outside hobbies or work instead of spending time with his spouse or partner. As a result, the man may become a workaholic, using work and finances as an escape from the lack of intellectual or mental stimulation from his partner. Emotional and physical biorhythms are harmonious or compatible: The situation is quite complicated. It is better for men to avoid women in which they have such biorhythmic compatibilities. Besides a desire to possess you completely, there is a physical bent and sexual satisfaction, which is not achievable with anyone. The latter confuses men and makes woman’s behaviour more cruel in her struggle for her happiness. Only intellectual biorhythms are harmonious or compatible: It is the third type in reverse. A woman can be attracted by a man’s mental abilities or his skillfulness in speaking. But over a period of time, a person gets used to everything and finds nothing that brings warmth to their soul. A man begins to fight for his happiness. It means trouble for the woman, who gets married to such a man. Intellectual and physical biorhythms are harmonious or compatible: A physical satisfaction (contentment), which is associated with love, is added to the previous type. A man will make a lot of efforts to conquer such a woman. Intellectual and emotional biorhythms are harmonious or compatible: It is platonic love. Everything is good, except the sex factor. It is the type that is a real friendship and cooperation on all the levels. It is a good choice for a secretary, but not for a wife or romantic partner. Young people, whose feelings are developed more than their intimate relations, can fall into such a trap. In such families there are rare occurrences of love-making or a lack of sexual relations altogether. It is better for partners to take a rest from each other or sleep in different rooms. All three biorhythms are harmonious (60-80%): There is stability, warmth and mutual understanding between the romantic partners, which could be even stronger. For people who are satisfied with their position and have a good family, it is more like deep, strong companionship and cooperation. Maximalists, who are looking for complete harmony and compatibility, can destroy everything they should save with their own hands. Three harmonious biorhythms (more than 80%-100%) should unite people in marriage: True love, real feelings and the right kind of sex is possible with this dynamic. Such couples might say that others don’t understand what real love is: one shouldn’t speak about feelings, one should just love! These women end up giving birth to intelligent, beautiful and healthy children who live a happy life and are free of all kinds of problems (if they don’t make problems for themselves) including health, romantic, educational and financial. So, we have the characteristics of marriage from the biorhythmic point of view. Maybe someone thinks that life is more complicated than theories and formula. But our being can’t be more difficult than natural laws. We can’t always be united with the one we want, but we can avoid an unpleasant person. The main thing is to give our children all the very best, but our trust in God alone.

The following ratings are compatibility ratings between the two actors portraying the fictional characters and the fictional romantic couples. This is not a real life shipping post so please look at these ratings and results as purely compatibility between two actors (Results are based on date of birth between the actors). All of the results and ratings are 99.9% accurate with a margin of error of +/- 1.

Tyler Posey & Arden Cho (TV or Film Couple: Scott McCall & Kira Yukimura; TV Show or Film: Teen Wolf; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 53%)

Chris Noth & Sarah Jessica Parker (TV or Film Couple: Mr. Big & Carrie Bradshaw; TV Show or Film: Sex In The City; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 54%)

Milo Ventimiglia & Alexis Bledel (TV or Film Couple: Jess Mariano & Rory Gilmore; TV Show or Film: Gilmore Girls; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 35%)

Chad Michael Murray & Sophia Bush (TV or Film Couple: Lucas Scott & Brooke Davis; TV Show or Film: One Tree Hill; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 57%)

Josh Radnor & Cobie Smulders (TV or Film Couple: Ted Mosby & Robin Scherbatsky; TV Show or Film: How I Met Your Mother; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 95%)

Michael Vartan & Jennifer Garner (TV or Film Couple: Michael Vaughn & Sydney Bristow; TV Show or Film: Alias; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 56%)

Chad Michael Murray & Hilarie Burton (TV or Film Couple: Lucas Scott & Peyton Sawyer; TV Show or Film: One Tree Hill; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 42%)

Rupert Grint & Emma Watson (TV or Film Couple: Ron Weasley & Hermione Granger; TV Show or Film: Harry Potter Franchise; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 74%)

Colin O’Donoghue & Jennifer Morrison (TV or Film Couple: Killian “Captain Hook” Jones & Emma Swan; TV Show or Film:Once Upon A Time; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 43%)

Bradley James & Colin Morgan (TV or Film Couple: Arthur Pendragon & Merlin; TV Show or Film: Merlin; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 62%)

Josh Dallas & Ginnifer Goodwin (TV or Film Couple: Prince Charming & Snow White; TV Show or Film: Once Upon A Time; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 79%)

David Boreanaz & Emily Deschanel (TV or Film Couple: Seeley Booth & Temperance “Bones” Brennen; TV Show or Film: Bones; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 55%)

David Duchovny & Gillian Anderson (TV or Film Couple: Fox Mulder & Dana Scully; TV Show or Film: The X-Files; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 49%)

Neil Patrick Harris & Cobie Smulders (TV or Film Couple: Barney Stinson & Robin Scherbatsky; TV Show or Film: How I Met Your Mother; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 60%)

Richard Burton & Elizabeth Taylor (TV or Film Couple: Mark Anthony & Cleopatra; TV Show or Film: Cleopatra; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 83%)

Jared Padalecki & Jensen Ackles (TV or Film Couple: Wincest; TV Show or Film: Supernatural; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 83%)

Wilmer Valderrama & Mila Kunis (TV or Film Couple: Fez & Jackie Burkhart; TV Show or Film: That 70′s Show; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 88%)

Sam Heughan & Catriona Balfe (TV or Film Couple: Jamie Fraser & Claire Fraser; TV Show or Film: Outlander; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 52%)

Darren Criss & Chris Colfer (TV or Film Couple: Blaine Anderson & Kurt Hummel; TV Show or Film: Glee; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 42%)

Vanessa Morgan & Madelaine Petsch (TV or Film Couple: Toni Topaz & Cheryl Blossom; TV Show or Film: Riverdale; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 54%)

Jared Padalecki & Alexis Bledel (TV or Film Couple: Dean Forrester & Rory Gilmore; TV Show or Film: Gilmore Girls; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 74%)

Chris Wood & Melissa Benoist (TV or Film Couple: Mon-El & Kara Danvers; TV Show or Film: Supergirl; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 55%)

Dylan O’Brien & Shelley Hennig (TV or Film Couple: Stiles Stilinski & Malia Tate; TV Show or Film: Teen Wolf; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 45%)

Bob Morley & Eliza Taylor (TV or Film Couple: Bellamy Blake & Clarke Griffin; TV Show or Film: The 100; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 71%)

John Boyega & Daisy Ridley (TV or Film Couple: Finn & Rey; TV Show or Film: Star Wars Franchise; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 76%)

Nathan Fillion & Stana Katic (TV or Film Couple: Richard Castle & Kate Beckett; TV Show or Film: Castle; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 73%)

Alexander Skarsgard & Anna Paquin (TV or Film Couple: Eric Northman & Sookie Stackhouse; TV Show or Film: True Blood; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 70%)

Tyler Posey & Dylan O’Brien (TV or Film Couple: Scott McCall & Stiles Stilinski; TV Show or Film: Teen Wolf; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 62%)

Camila Mendes & Lili Reinhart (TV or Film Couple: Veronica Lodge & Betty Cooper; TV Show or Film: Riverdale; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 65%)

Charles Melton & Camila Mendes (TV or Film Couple: Reggie Mantle & Veronica Lodge; TV Show or Film: Riverdale; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 48%)

Jason Dohring & Kristen Bell (TV or Film Couple: Logan Echolls & Veronica Mars; TV Show or Film: Veronica Mars; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 89%)

Toby Regbo & Adelaide Kane (TV or Film Couple: King Francis II of France & Queen Mary of Scots; TV Show or Film: Reign; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 64%)

Torrance Coombs & Adelaide Kane (TV or Film Couple: Sebastian “Bash” de Poitiers & Queen Mary Of Scots; TV Show or Film:Reign; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 57%)

Chace Crawford & Blake Lively (TV or Film Couple: Nate Archibald & Serena Van Der Woodsen; TV Show or Film: Gossip Girl; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 89%)

James Lafferty & Bethany Joy Lenz (TV or Film Couple: Nathan Scott & Haley James Scott; TV Show or Film: One Tree Hill; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 48%)

Joseph Morgan & Phoebe Tonkin (TV or Film Couple: Klaus Mikaelson & Hayley Marshall; TV Show or Film: The Originals; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 35%)

Joseph Morgan & Leah Pipes (TV or Film Couple: Klaus Mikaelson & Camille O’Connell; TV Show or Film: The Originals; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 67%)

Daniel Gillies & Phoebe Tonkin (TV or Film Couple: Elijah Mikaelson & Hayley Marshall; TV Show or Film: The Originals; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 47%)

Gavin Leatherwood & Kiernan Shipka (TV or Film Couple: Nick Scratch & Sabrina Spellman; TV Show or Film: Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 87%)

Ross Lynch & Kiernan Shipka (TV or Film Couple: Harvey Kinkle & Sabrina Spellman; TV Show or Film: Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina; Biorhythm Compatibility Rating: 45%)

More couples in Part 3!

#riverdale #the originals #caos #one tree hill #gossip girl #once upon a time #teen wolf #Gilmore girls #scira #brucas #leyton #captain swan #nabrina #habrina #merlin #merthur #J2 #spn #supernatural

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nadziejastar · 5 years ago

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How Isa Became a Seeker of Darkness

So, I obviously think the idea that Isa willingly became a Seeker of Darkness is ludicrous. Terra became a Seeker of Darkness by having his rage exploited. Riku (Replica) became a Seeker of Darkness by having his jealousy exploited. I thought it would be interesting to speculate more in-depth on what emotional weakness Xehanort exploited to get Isa to fall to darkness.

Secret Ansem Report 2

I have made a grave mistake. My study of the "darkness of the heart" began with a simple psychological test and quickly snowballed. Spurred on by my youngest apprentice, Ienzo, I constructed a massive laboratory in the basement of my castle.

Unbeknownst to me, my six apprentices then began collecting a large number of subjects on which to perform dangerous experiments into the "darkness of the heart." As soon as I found out, I called my apprentices together and ordered them not only to cease their studies, but to destroy the results of their research thus far.

Upon his advice, I decided to review the data obtained at my basement lab. That is when I discovered the "Ansem's Reports." Though they bore my name, the only one I had written was number 0. Apparently he had gone on to pen numbers 1 through 8 himself. Yes — the first subject in my foolish experiments.

Zexion has a weapon called “Taboo Papers” which is part of Wild Gear. This may be a reference to the reports that Ansem the Wise discovered before he realized the dangerous experiments his apprentices were conducting without his knowledge. Saïx’s Wild Gear weapon is called “Crescent” and it is shaped an awful lot like the astrological symbol for Black Moon Lilith. This is the reason why I think both of these weapons are referring to the experiments on darkness.

The Tower: When the Tower card appears in a Tarot reading, expect the unexpected – massive change, upheaval, destruction and chaos. It may be the loss of a loved one or any event that shakes you to your core, affecting you spiritually, mentally and physically. There’s no escaping it.

Wild Gear is “The Tower” in Luxord’s deck, and it is very appropriate for the concept of Black Moon Lilith.

The Two of Pentacles: This suit represents something supportive that is available to you. The figure-eight image is a symbol of immortality and eternity. The card is a sign that you have to believe in yourself even if you aren't feeling confident.

“The Tower” is shaped like the Two of Pentacles.

Axel's weapons have a lot of alchemy symbolism. Saïx is a moon-based character, and his weapons are heavily based on astrology. One weapon is named “Astrologia” and another is named “Horoscope,” and they both incorporate astrological symbols into the design. Both of those weapons hint that Isa is associated with the zodiac sign Cancer (ruled by the Moon). The weapon named “Twilight” hints that he is also associated with the zodiac sign Pisces (ruled by Neptune). These two water zodiac signs are the most emotional ones---the polar opposite of Saïx, who shows almost no human emotion. There’s also a weapon shaped like the symbol for the asteroid Vesta, known as “The Guardian of the Sacred Flame”. Astrologically, Vesta defines how you see your mission and truth in life and the world.

Black Moon Lilith is the geometric point in the sky that marks the furthest point of the Moon’s orbit around the earth, the apogee. It’s the mathematical point that’s exactly in between the Earth and the Moon–essentially, empty space. It is a dark void, which stays approximately nine months in each zodiac sign.

In an astrology chart, Black Moon Lilith represents a person’s primitive impulses and behavior in their rawest form. Psychologically, it is a point that represents how we react to emptiness and isolation. It brings up deep and primal issues like repressed feelings of rejection, rage, and the refusal to give in.

One of KH3's most important themes is "facing your fears". Knowing where Black Moon Lilith is located in a birth chart can reveal information related to the shadow self. It reveals our deepest fears and how we project those fears onto others.

Black Moon Lilith in Cancer

The Black Moon Lilith in Cancer reflects a deep fear of abandonment. Cancers are the nurturers in society, but are prone to feelings of loneliness and lack of support. Lilith in Cancer brings up issues around dependency and co-dependency and detests people that come across as needy or clingy; this is a part of themselves that they dislike and therefore project these issues onto others.

In Cancer, the shadow is caused by the fear of abandonment and it manifests as intense separation anxiety. I think the writers were inspired by this idea with the plot for Abrabah in 358/2 Days. Aladdin was reluctant to rely on his best friend Genie even though he really needed help, and the novel hinted that there was a parallel to Axel's past with his best friend.

Aladdin: See, Genie and Carpet took off to see the world. It's what Genie always wanted, so I wished him the best and all, but...

Goofy: You miss him.

Sora: Man, things must be REALLY quiet with Genie gone.

This theme was continued in KH2, where Aladdin really missed Genie, who had gone away. He felt lonely. Saïx appears to be very ashamed of this aspect of his human self and projects this “weakness” onto others, like Roxas. He also has mixed feelings towards Axel due to this issue.

“Bet you don’t know why the sun sets red. You see, light is made up of lots of colors. And out of all those colors, red is the one that travels the farthest.”

Something interesting is that the Cancer zodiac sign (ruled by the Moon) begins on the day of the summer solstice, which is the longest day of the year. Day 255 is called "The Longest Day" and it's when Axel tells Roxas about the red sunset. Black Moon Lilith is the furthest point of the Moon’s orbit from the Earth. It represents total darkness---an empty void. I think it's cool how the Kingdom Hearts writers incorporated astrological concepts into the story like this. But how does all of this relate to the plot?

Secret Report 4: Experiments of the Heart – Notes on Subject X, Excerpt 2

Secret Report 4 is obtained after clearing Battlegate 4 at Toy Box: Galaxy Toys / Kid Corral.

My pilot studies used a handful of subjects, but none possessed the fortitude to endure them. Ultimately, all suffered mental collapse. I knew it would be a heavy blow to lose a subject as unique as she. Upon discovering the tests I've been conducting, my master demanded that I cease my work immediately and destroy what research I have compiled. Worse still, he ordered the release of my remaining subjects. She is gone. Where is Subject X now? Has "wise" Master Ansem hidden her away? —Xehanort

In KH3, one of the reports on Subject X was found in the Kid Corral. This is also the world where Young Xehanort learned that he can create vessels by putting a heart into an empty puppet. Young Xehanort split the world in two, and separated Andy’s Toys, in order to test the strength of their bond.

Young Xehanort: In this world toys have hearts. And those hearts come from a powerful bond. So what happens when those bonds are stretched to their limit? When they are worlds apart, can cloth and plastic hold on to their hearts? All I needed was a wedge to widen the divide---someone like you to fill them with distrust and doubt. And that chasm you created can be filled with a vast darkness.

Young Xehanort took Buzz through a portal in the Kid Korral, then revealed that the darkness in him was born when he was separated from Andy. This loneliness created a chasm that Xehanort was able to fill with darkness. Sora and Woody dispelled the darkness of his isolation by surrounding him with the light of their friendship.

“Well, I think you can be inseparable, even if you’re apart. It’s like, if you feel really close to each other. Like best friends.”

I wonder if Young Xehanort did something similar with Lea and Isa using the Datascape, which is itself another world. And since Lea and Isa’s connection was so strong, Isa’s heart didn’t collapse and he became the unique Subject X, the most prospective candidate for becoming a vessel for the X-Blade. Saïx seems to have huge issues with being alone. He said there was no meaning in fighting alone and got really upset when Sora said that he wasn’t alone. Lea and Isa lost their hearts right outside of the Datascape. It looked kinda similar to when Axel brought Xion back and collapsed afterwards. That was the last time he saw her. Maybe Lea went inside the Datascape to retrieve Isa, who was put in there as part of the experiment.

“You’re letting yourself get too attached to them.”

“Right, sir, of course, sir.” Saïx spun on his heels.

That was all he wanted to say to me?

But just as Saïx started walking away, he caught a barely audible murmur—

“You’ve changed.”

He listened to Saïx’s receding footsteps, and his gaze dropped to his own feet.

“You sure I’m the one who changed?” he said under his breath.

There's also various hints in the story that Isa was very clingy towards Lea. Since he was described as a quiet boy who only came out of his shell for Lea, this is a very believable personality trait. It seemed like this was supposed to be an important aspect of Isa’s character and would explain some of Saïx's warped personality traits. I also like that we can fight Anti-Saïx during the fight where Roxas is trying to leave the organization. Isa's fear of abandonment was probably the weakness that was exploited by the apprentices. Axel remarks that Saïx has changed several times in 358/2 Days. And a few of those times, it seemed related to the clingy and needy aspect of his personality. One instance is when he said Axel was getting too attached to Roxas and Xion. And in the manga, they reinforced this idea by hinting that Isa became easily attached, like he did with Pluto.

“I thought I told you not to get too involved.” Saïx swung his chair, turning his back on Axel. Axel could feel nothing but a will of rejection from that back.

“Just look at it. I won’t say any more than that.”

For Saïx to say that, he probably doesn’t intend to tell me any more.

Axel stared at Saïx’s back.

The two of us have definitely changed since those times.

“…I wonder which of us it was that changed,” muttered Axel, and Saïx’s shoulders trembled for just a second. Without waiting for an answer, Axel left the room.

Another instance is when Axel was trying to get Saïx to open up to him by putting his hand on his shoulder. Then Saïx coldly brushed his hand off and refused to tell him anything. This cold rejection made him think how much things had changed between them.

Within one of them, Terra, I sensed something. The boy, though well-intentioned, seeks power single-mindedly. And that kind of hunger is a seedbed for darkness. I had found my vessel.

Black Moon Lilith is all about emptiness, incompleteness, being estranged, and feeling like you are lacking something or someone important.

“If your best friend goes away, you’re sad, and if you get to be with them, you’re happy,” Naminé added. “Isn’t that how it is, Axel?”

“…That’s about the size of it.” Axel nodded and sat down on the remaining empty sofa, staring at the sea-salt ice cream he held.

Maybe this is why Isa was viewed as a better candidate for a vessel than Lea. Xehanort may have found him a better seedbed for darkness due to his emotional dependence on Lea and his vulnerability. Master Xehanort turned Terra into a Seeker of Darkness by exploiting his desire for power. I think Isa's darkness was fueled by loneliness. The same feeling Axel suffered from for the entire story, causing him to chase after Roxas like a lost puppy.

Sora: Your “loneliness” only made Buzz and Woody’s connection stronger.

Since they both shared the same pain, I think it would have made their connection stronger in the end.

#kh theories #kh meta #kh saix #kh isa #KH #kingdom hearts

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diamondprima · 5 years ago

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Late night ranting: Gilgamesh and Diarmuid's friendship

Yes hello it's me,

And in this post I will be rambling about why Diarmuid and Gilgamesh from Fate/Zero would make best friends if they didn't have to murder each other.

Tldr: Gilgamesh needs someone that can see past his douchebag nature and can be kind and understanding to him. Diarmuid can be exactly that while still being firm about Gilgamesh needing to learn how to act.

To explain myself a bit more though, I believe that while these two are polar opposites, they have traits that the other one could find admirable. Gilgamesh is powerful and has a strong fighting spirit (if he believes you deserve it but shht) and Diarmuid has resolve and skills. All though reluctant, I think they would find the other a worthwhile opponent, and by extension, a worthwhile friend? After all in a friendship respect is key.

However, it's not just their respect for each other. It's obvious that both of them have things to learn from the other. Diarmuid must learn how to assert himself. Even though he has opinions on things, he barely seems able to voice them, especially when it comes to someone in a higher position than him (see Keyneth literally using his past against him in episode 15 or 16 of the second season of Fate/Zero. Keyneth's argument was unreasonable, and even though Diarmuid showed some weak defense he didn't try to stand up for himself at all). Gilgamesh on the other hand needs to have an ego check, and learn how to be less of a major douchebag, and well, who's better to teach him than noble and humble Diarmuid?

So to sum up, we already have two very different characters that admire each other and have things to learn from one another. A very good foundation for a friendship, at least in my experience.

Here is where we move on to the more sentimental part of this friendship.

I believe that Gilgamesh is not inherently evil. Yes, he did lots of awful things, but Enkidu helped him become a better person through their friendship. This is why Enkidu's death devastated Gilgamesh. His only friend, gone because of his own stupidity.

After that of course Gilgamesh would turn into an irredeemable douchebag again! He hated everyone and himself, so it's only logical that without Enkidu by his side he'd go back to his bullshit.

So naturally, even the mere concept of friendship was out of the question for him. Everyone hated him or feared him, and I'm gonna say that Gilgamesh thought that was better, since making friends would put them in immediate danger from any enemies he might recklessly make. He didn't want to risk the lives of people he cared about just because he was an idiot. He didn't want another Enkidu.

Only someone kind and patient enough would be able to see past that awful nature of his and give him a chance to redeem himself. Someone like, you guessed it, Diarmuid.

Keyneth, Fionn, Sola, Grainne, they all made his life difficult in one way or another. But not once did I see him snap or be demeaning or anything. He took the hits pretty well. He even somewhat respected Fionn and Grainne's marriage, even though Grainned, the woman he loved, tried to use magic to lure him. Fionn was his former higher up, who he served loyally until he literally left Diarmuid to die, Keyneth was an abusive asshole of a master and Sola was just hitting on him non stop. And yet he kept being as respectful and obedient as he could. He gave them all chances they didn't deserve, and if that's not kindness I don't know what is.

Since he's obviously very kind and respectful in general, he's obviously gonna be that way with someone that he would consider a friend of his. And in all honesty, things aren't that complicated. Diarmuid does not have special powers. He's just the only one that would take time to understand Gilgamesh and try to help him with his emotional baggage, and that's all Gilgamesh really needs. Someone calm that can listen.

"But!", I hear you typing, "What does Diarmuid get back for this? Their friendship can't be a one way thing!"

Well, a friend obviously!!! The last friend of his left him to die alone in the woods. I'm pretty sure he could use some new ones. Gilgamesh can be a good friend, we know that from his time with Enkidu. And as I said, Diarmuid can learn a few things from Gilgamesh, as weird as that may sound.

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lightsandlostbells · 6 years ago

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Skam France season 3, episode 2 reaction

Skam France is really leveling up

Eliott Demaury, raccoon enthusiast is the best creative decision they’ve ever made

Episode 2

Clip 1 - surejan.gif

Is the B-roll or w/e at the start of the clip the same place Lucas was brooding in the first clip of the season? It’s probably reading too much into it but I like that those two dudes on the bench are there for a reason, like mirroring Lucas and Eliott at the end of the last episode, sitting with space between them (no Chloé in the middle, though).

Lucas scrolls through his phone looking for Eliott. He doesn’t find him, but he does find a friend request from Chloé, which he accepts after a moment’s hesitation. Son, she’s going to take that as a marriage proposal.

Mika plops down beside him and nags Lucas about the rent. Now that Manon’s parents are no longer financing Lucas’ rent, seems like he’s behind. Can I just mention that Mika and Lucas look like they could be related? I know it is a running Skam fandom joke that the Evak couples look related (sometimes said with underlying homophobia IMO BUT I’m not going to go into that rant now) and I’ve seen people say Lucas and Eliott look similar, but Lucas and Mika are the ones who stick out the most to me. Actually, Lisa too. If you told me that this was an apartment of like ... three siblings being gay and cranky at each other, I would buy it.

Notifications are going off on Mika’s phone. It’s because Mika changed his profile pic, which he helpfully shows to Lucas/the viewers - I mean, I can get why his phone is blowing up, not gonna lie. No dick from what I can see, but you know. Suggestive. Pubes are clearly visible.

Lucas is like, I don’t want to see that! Well, I don’t think Lucas objects to naked men but I believe him in this instance because Mika is fulfilling the big brother role. Mika teases him about seeing what a man’s body looks like. Don’t worry Mika, in like a month Lucas is going to have very thorough knowledge of what a man’s body looks like.

Mika then asks for Lucas’ advice on a straight dude who wants a blowjob. Does he want it for himself or to do it to Mika? He helpfully imitates a blowjob that freaks out Lucas. I mean, it kinda freaks me out, I had war flashbacks to that grapefruit technique video. (If you have not seen that video, all I’m going to say that it is highly NSFW, not to be watched in public or if you have a heart condition, and I’m sorry.)

Mika is like, if you want to suck dick, you’re not that straight. Lucas is like, well, maybe he wants to try. Maybe that guy is just curious! HMMM Lucas, interesting train of thought. I’m sure you have no personal investment in this debate whatsoever. Mika helpfully shows Lucas’ a picture of the “curious” guy’s butthole. That Mika, being so helpful today.

Lucas gets up because he doesn’t want to spend his weekend looking at naked guys. Well, maybe not guys, plural. Again, in about a month you’re going to look back on that comment and laugh, bro.

Mika and Lisa agree that Manon was funnier. Lmao, I kinda love how they’re so unimpressed with Lucas.

Clip 2 - Light and dark

Lucas walks into school on Monday morning and … goes through an attendance book? He didn’t even hesitate, this guy does not give a single shit, does he? He’s just going to grab love by the balls. The camera puts us in Lucas’ POV by focusing from top to bottom like it’s imitating Lucas scanning the list, which is a good detail. Skam France had some POV issues I didn’t care for in previous seasons so this feels more carefully thought out.

Just as I’m noticing Raptor Alex’s name above Eliott’s, the man himself appears. Oh yeah, they’re supposed to be pals now. They have a short conversation where Lucas is like, WHOOPS, silly me taking the wrong book! When Alex asks for the register, Lucas snakes out and distracts him by congratulating Alex on him and Emma. Alex is like, “Huh? Did Emma tell you that?” Well, they were obviously making out at the party and hanging out together in their IG stories, so while it’s maybe an assumption that they are 100% a couple, there’s obviously something going on between them.

I’ve never really been like ... dying for Isak/P-Chris friendship or interaction post-S2, although I think it could have been interesting. Plus, Chris had graduated by S3 so there weren’t as many opportunities for them to interact. But it’s a nice follow-up here since Raptor Alex is still in school with them. (Was he supposed to graduate along with Charles last year, though? I totally forgot. It feels like those seasons aired forever ago.)

Bell rings, Lucas scampers off with the register. I was like, “Wait, did he even put it back?” until Alex calls after him for it, lmao. I like to imagine that it’s just gone forever, a casualty of love.

In the classroom, Lucas looks up Eliott on his phone. Unlike Isak, he has the wisdom to plug in earbuds before listening to anything.

He’s looking at a crowdfunding page for a project of Eliott’s. It’s noted that the project closed and that the funding was not reached, and that detail punched a hole in my heart. Instant poignancy, instant affection for Eliott. We don’t know the circumstances yet of why he didn’t meet his goal, and if it was at all related to his manic/depressive episodes - perhaps a nice bit of foreshadowing if it turns out they are related - but it’s automatically sympathetic to learn someone had a dream that went unfulfilled.

In a video, Eliott is talking about his project - a film called Polaris, about two characters and a tunnel. One is a boy, and one is not specified, (a boy, a girl, a creature) which I think is hinting at Elliott’s pansexuality, that he’s okay with any gender, it doesn’t matter to him. The second character does not leave the tunnel, because they are afraid of the light, and they meet the boy, who’s afraid of the dark. They can’t live in each other’s worlds so they chat at the border without ever seeing each other. They talk and fall in love but never meet until one of them decides to conquer their fears and go to the other’s world.

So there’s a lot of obvious symbolism here. Tbh, it’s pretty on the nose and I wish they’d toned it down just a smidge, since this is like … probably exactly what is going to happen with them for either their first kiss or their version of O Helga Natt (or both), but I still appreciate the effort a lot and am eager to see it in action. This is what I wanted from S3 remakes, for each of them to develop their own symbolism that fits their characters, because Isak and Even’s symbolism is so specific to them, their names and their story, that you inherently lose something when you transplant it to other versions of them. The concept of rebirth is really beautiful in a gay love story about coming out and being born as one’s authentic self; I think the idea of light and darkness being used in a similar way - especially in terms of a coming out narrative, being in darkness, coming into the light - could also be beautiful, and of course there are the ideas of having to be brave in order to live with each other, very relevant for an m/m couple in a homophobic society and for someone like Eliott who would be afraid to get close to someone due to his mental illness. It also works in the sense that neither of the characters in the film see each other until they get over their fears - both Lucas and Eliott have baggage and neither will really “see” or understand each other truly until they confront their respective issues.

Right now it seems like Eliott would be the one in the tunnel and Lucas is the one who’s afraid of the dark, and Lucas is going to have to leave his world to be with Eliott. Because well, this is supposed to be Lucas’ story, and the name “Lucas” is associated with light, or meaning “light-giver” or something similar. We know that one episode is called “the boy who was afraid of the dark” and that’s probably referring to Lucas since it’s his POV. At this point in the story, too, we aren’t supposed to know that Eliott is mentally ill, we don’t know he’s struggling, so we might also think that it’ll all be on Lucas to change in order for them to be together. But I think it’s also plausible that maybe they’ll switch roles over the course of the season, they both take turns in the light and in the dark. Maybe Lucas steps into the dark for the first kiss, conquering what he’s afraid of, then he steps into the light for the O Helga Natt equivalent. Or Lucas steps into the dark for the kiss, Eliott must step into the light for O Helga Natt. There are many ways it could go. But this is also what I like about them changing the symbolism, it leads to this kind of speculation.

I’d like to see Lucas and Eliott being a little more strongly contrasted, too, sort of like they’re ... polar opposites, eh? OK, not that corny and not that they need to be so different that they can’t get along. I just think it’d be interesting with the light and dark metaphor to have them be clearly different in some ways, personality-wise, arc-wise. I want to see their separate worlds highlighted at some point.

Also want to mention that you could perhaps apply this imagery to certain scenes already, like in the first clip of the season you had Lucas in the daytime, light reflecting off the water and through the trees, but he’s not really comfortable there, he’s alone and detached. Later that night, Lucas making out with Chloé in the hallway sort of put him in shadow (or that might be Skam France’s lighting in general, IDK). Might be a reach but it’d be interesting if those choices stacked up throughout the season and reflected the larger metaphor, when we see who’s playing what role.

Polaris itself is “the brightest star in the constellation of Ursa Minor” so that’s another nice allusion to light in itself.

Imane shows up and scares the bejesus out of Lucas. She was going to give him the weed, but he ruined it by being a weenie. However, he redeems himself by expressing interest in the common room project and saying he’ll be at the next meeting. I wonder what changed his mind? Daphne’s enthusiasm? No matter, Imane must see some progress in Lucas, like he needs a reward for good behavior, because she decides to give him back the weed.

He’s grateful, but the teacher sees their drug exchange and wants to know what’s going on. When she asks to see what’s under the table, Imane whips out some tampons and says Lucas brought them to her. LMAO, that’s pretty funny.

She calls out the teacher for humiliating her in front of everyone, which is also funny, although I kind of feel bad for that teacher, lol. We haven’t seen her be a racist yet like Isak and Sana’s teacher, and I mean ... her students were passing drugs under the table, she wasn’t wrong about them being shady.

Arthur and Alexia laugh at them in the background. I want to know what’s going on over at that table! We can have two pairs of classroom buddies!

Lucas and Imane both laugh so that’s really the kickoff to their friendship. Tampons: saving the day, bringing people together. Tampax should make it into a commercial.

Clip 3 - Questionnaires

It’s the common room meeting, just the girl squad and Lucas, and they’re going over the questionnaires that people filled out. The consensus is that the common room sucks, and people make dirty comments when anonymous (literally the least surprising thing ever if you have ever seen a bathroom stall or any comments section on the Internet).

Daphne kicks out Emma when she gets a phone call and Lucas laughs along with the others. He seems way happier and more comfortable with the girl squad than with anyone else so far, and I think a lot of that is because there isn’t the pressure to maintain a typical hetero fuckboy persona with them as with the boy squad. They’re just girls engaging on a dorky project, so he can just relax.

Alex reads another questionnaire and the answers are all about Daphne. Lucas confirms that the phone number on the page is Basile’s. Daphne looks done with it, she’s caught him staring and drooling, she doesn’t get why he’s into her all of a sudden. Man, I’m already sick of Basile, he’s like Magnus from hell. Especially because Daphne is so not into it, and the fact that she’s noticed him salivating him over her makes it worse. I think it’s for comic relief but it quickly went to creepy territory, and I hate that they’ll likely hook up at some point. Please please don’t go there.

A lot of the questionnaires mention they dislike the mural, so I bet they’ll paint another one at some point, and I bet Eliott will have an idea that they use, being the artsy guy he is. Also, everyone wants them to throw a party so I’m sure that’ll be the setup for either the neon party or the Christmas party (whatever takes the place of those scenes).

Lucas reads another questionnaire that requests a vending machine (reasonable) and a nudist day once a month (not so reasonable) and I was gonna say it was Eliott’s form, because of the vending machine connection and probably some painful foreshadowing toward the hotel naked incident, but actually it’s Alexia’s form, LMAO. She wants the eye candy of naked guys and girls. A nice way to integrate her bisexuality since she’s into naked guys and girls.

I notice that Alexia has a little rainbow patch on her jeans, so I’m hoping that they’ve taken feedback from earlier seasons and will more directly address her sexuality. I know her ex Clara has been listed in the credits, so that’s very promising. I hope they keep it up and maybe Lucas can connect with her over being LGBT, well, G and B, respectively.

Emma comes back and complains that Alex thinks she’s been telling people they’ve been going out when they’re just hooking up, but Lucas does not care (even though he is responsible for giving Alex that impression) because Eliott walks by the window. Lucas hauls ass out of there and goes out to find him - give him some credit, Lucas is being pretty upfront about approaching Eliott, or going after what he wants so far. What is that gonna end up meaning to his overall character arc? I’m fine with that approach to Lucas’ character, I’m just curious how it will affect his overall characterization from beginning to end. Because Isak wasn’t a total wallflower, he did pursue Even in his own way, but I felt like because he also could be reserved and shy about Even, it was narratively significant when he took certain steps for clear reasons to his personal growth. (I think Lucas and Isak are maybe not all that different about their approaches so far, just slight ways that make it seem Lucas is bolder - like going up to Eliott at the vending machine himself, grabbing the register instead of walking by a list, running after Eliott instead of standing still and locking eyes with him).

Before Lucas can go stalking, he runs into the boy squad. Yann is like, were you in the common room? Spending a lot of time with the girls, eh? Like is he just being a dick about that, because Lucas is choosing the girls over the boy squad, or does he think Lucas wants to hook up with one of those girls? Or is this more about the common room project seeming stupid to him?

Of course Basile has to ask about whether Daphne is thinking about him, GOD please shut him up. Arthur tells him Daphne doesn’t care about him. The hero we need.

Lucas looks around the courtyard but no Eliott in sight. ur boys cockblocked u, bro

Chloé and Maria come up and invite the boys to their party on Friday. Maria’s fucking cute when she’s not puking, she does a little dance with the invitation. Lucas tries to say they have plans but Arthur’s like, no we don’t! We’re coming! No, Arthur, don’t say that, you know Basile is going to be a creep about it.

The squad gangs up on Lucas for saying no, because you’re always supposed to say yes to partying with girls, and it’s played for laughs with their reactions and stuff but really it is shitty how these guys don’t want to listen to their friend. I mean, let’s say situations were reversed and Lucas was a girl who said “this guy is stalking me.” We’d all be like, get away from that dude, you don’t have to spend time with him, right? Or we’d hope that girl’s friends would say so.

Lucas says Chloé has been clinging to him and it’s stressing him out, and Arthur’s like, I don’t get you, she’s into you, but you’re stressing out? Lucas is clearly stressed by this conversation and that he can’t tell the boys what’s up. All that pressure to like girls is draining him.

I think it is important to keep in mind that Isak also felt isolated from the boy squad at this point in the story, for similar reasons: he had a big secret that he couldn’t tell them, and he felt like he had to like girls to fit in with them, and they put pressure on him to hook up with girls, talk about girls, go to parties with girls. What I think is the big difference, and why it feels perhaps more noticeable with Lucas, is that Isak didn’t have the interaction with the girl squad other than Sana blackmailing him and Vilde annoying him, so we didn’t see him have this friendly outlet where he’s relaxed. In fact, the first time in his season we see him really start to relax and be himself is with Even. I think that contrast was valuable toward establishing Isak’s connection with Even, showing Even as someone who brings Isak out of his shell. But with Lucas, first he is able to laugh together with Imane - Isak and Sana had a moment but they weren’t like giggling together after Isak told off the racist teacher - and second he seems to be having a good time at the common room meeting. Then he goes to the boy squad and it immediately becomes tense. However, I don’t have a huge problem with Lucas laughing a bit with the girl squad here. It makes him seem somewhat less socially isolated, since he seems relaxed with them (even if this isn’t the deepest or most intimate interaction), but it still provides contrast to his interaction with his male friends. It would be nice if the story highlighted this a little more later on, as to why Lucas might feel more comfortable with the girl squad and not the boys when he’s closeted.

Clip 4 - Polaris

At home, Lucas watches the animated storyboard for Eliott’s Polaris video. A guy and another person of ambiguous gender meet just outside the tunnel in the rain and finally kiss.

I like that Lucas got to watch the project itself (or a storyboard of it) and be invested in it. That’s something I loved about Isak watching Even’s video and then watching R+J - he got to fall for Even watching him be funny and strange talking about his Cap/Putin video, and then he got to watch a movie that Even loved and that awakened these very emotional parts of himself. He got to see a great love in action and wish for that for himself, he got a glimpse of Even’s soul from the art Even loves. Lucas does something similar here in that he gets a glimpse of Eliott’s creative mind, something very personal, and fall for him further, and Eliott’s video is also about great love that Lucas feels that he wants in his own life, it chips away at that facade he’s put up, the lie he’s living. Good adaptation.

The only thing is I suspect that their first kiss or O Helga Natt is probably going to go heavily like that storyboard, if not exactly, which will likely be beautiful, but again, slightly on the nose for me. To be fair, obviously Isak and Even’s first kiss imitated Romeo + Juliet closely; I guess this being Eliott’s own creation/vision vs Even’s fanboying a film by his favorite director makes it a little more OTT, like if a scene from a novel I’d written came into my life, I’d feel weird and self-conscious about it. But that’s just me! I can also see why it’d matter to Eliott, to take this longing and make it a reality. But I think I’d rather just see him make his actual film, accomplish his passion project, than to recreate it in his own life. Maybe because, filming a beautiful love story and falling in love in real life fulfill two different parts of one’s self - one’s artistic creations are not substitutes for one’s social connections and vice versa - and Eliott’s unfunded film is a thing on its own that’s very poignant and begs to be carried to completion. Does that make sense? IDK, I’d like those big scenes to have similar themes and imagery but not like his storyboard come exactly to life. We’ll see how it goes.

I think it’s a little murky why Lucas searches for the “gay chat” - like is he trying to find Eliott there, or is he looking for any type of connection? Think it’s the former since that was shown more explicitly with Isak, but I guess you can say he’s just testing the gay waters.

The gay app that Lucas downloads features the picture of Skam France director David Hourrègue, much like Skam Italia had their male director in the gay app. (The directors look a tad similar, or is that just me?)

Lucas looks through pictures mainly of disembodied abs and bulges, until he stumbles upon Mika’s picture, and HA, that’s a REALLY good gag, hats off to Skam France. I remember being annoyed because they recreated the Jonas cunnilingus walk of fame in their season 2, except with none of the build-up that made the Jonas scene funny and emotionally resonant (with Eva’s reaction), so it lacked the impact and was just kinda there. This actually had some setup, good job.

Clip 5 - Two bros chillin’ at a bus stop

The boys are getting ready to go to Chloé’s party later and Basile starts talking about how he’ll get with Maria and I’m already so over this, please God let them talk about anything else. I get that this girl talk is establishing the overwhelming heteronormativity and pressure to pursue girls among these teenage boys, but like, let’s hear from Arthur about his hookup techniques, or if there’s a girl Yann likes, anything but Basile being a creep yet again.

He talks about calling himself “Daddy” to Maria as if I wasn’t already thoroughly horrified out by him. FUCK no.

And the guys are like, I thought you were all up in Daphne’s business? Basile basically doesn’t care, one girl or the other will do, ughhhh GODDDDD.

They tell Lucas that he’s paying for the beer because they’ve taken their turns paying. Lucas waits at the bus stop, texts his dad for rent and grocery money, then texts Mika for money (presumably to buy the beer). MEANWHILE, a figure in a familiar brown coat sits down. I can’t quite tell from the angle, is he sitting in the next seat or is there still one between them? You’d think Eliott would learn from the past not to leave space for any Chloés who might come along. (At the end of the clip I still couldn’t tell, lmao. Feel free to clarify if you have better spatial awareness than I do.)

It’s Lucas’ turn to get startled by a dude just staring at him intensely. They have some banter, Mika texts back that he’s working, Eliott notices something is up, Lucas explains that he has no money to buy beer for a party, so it’s Eliott’s suggestion to come back to his place and get the beer he has. Not Lucas asking him for help, like Isak did. Lucas has seemed somewhat more forthright in pursuing Eliott so this is a bit of a surprise, because a noticeable example of Isak asking Even for something was switched to Eliott offering. I guess you could say it’s Eliott’s development, if he’s the one in the dark and is holding himself back? We’ll see.

Clip 6 - Eliott confirmed weirdo

They go to Eliott’s place and Lucas checks out Eliott’s drawings. They’re cute. Dude really loves raccoons. They look at the drawings together and Eliott says they’re old and that he’s better at drawing himself now. Lucas is like … that’s you? LMAO, Eliott is so fucking weird, I kind of love him. He likes that raccoons have a mask. Well, we know Eliott has his own mask, so it’s fitting, I suppose.

Okay, French fans, I have to ask - what are the perceptions of raccoons in your culture? I found this article saying that the raccoon was introduced to France in 1966 and is considered a pest. They’re considered pests in North America, too, and spread disease, and sometimes they fall through ceilings, but like ... they’ve always been here, so there’s something about them that’s normalized, I guess?

Lucas asks if Eliott had to draw him what would it be. Well, that’s fucking forward. Eliott studies him and says he doesn’t know. So Eliott basically can’t figure out Lucas yet. What are the odds his later notes to Lucas will include his and Lucas’ fursonas? I know all Isaks are snakes but Lucas reminds me of a woodpecker, personally.

Or maybe they will both be raccoons for the sole reason that I want to start calling Lucas Little King Trashmouth.

MISSED OPPORTUNITY for Lucas to say “draw me like one of your French girls” or something along those lines, though.

Clip 7 - What ... the fuck ...

Lucas and Eliott smoke and talk. While Eliott gets up to change the music, Lucas checks his phone and he’s got messages from Chloé waiting for him.

Lucas blames his absence on the other guys lacking motivation and THAT is the least believable excuse I have heard in my fucking life, come on, Lucas. As if those dudes aren’t panting after those girls. Did you even meet Basile? If you talk to him for ten seconds you’ll already know the names of five girls he wants to fuck.

And of course he types this as Yann is trying to get in touch with him about the party, very much motivated to go.

One of these days an Isak just needs to lie in a plausible way. “Sorry I’m sick, I think I have food poisoning, I’ve been shitting my guts out for the last hour.” If you overshare and make it disgusting, they’re not going to question you further AND Chloé will probably back off and stop chasing you.

Lucas guesses that Eliott will be putting on some Chopin or Dad Jazz because the turntable makes him seem like a vintage collector but ACTUALLY Eliott is one weird motherfucker and I have to say, not even Even would pull this stunt this soon in their relationship, because what he puts on is dubstep and Eliott starts banging his head and jumping around in a completely unashamed way, and like, even Lucas in all his infatuation with this guy cannot help but stare at him like “what the fuck is going on.”

When Eliott asks about it Lucas responds, “....it’s cool!” in the same way I do when an older relative asks me what I think of The Big Bang Theory or the Minions.

Eliott asks Lucas about his tastes and Lucas is more into rock, like very famous bands, Nirvana, Rolling Stones, Beatles, The Clash. Eliott offers to put on Queen and luckily for the music licensing department Lucas is like, no, I like discovering new things. By which he means “I like discovering new boys.”

Eliott blows a perfect ring of smoke so we know he has more smoke skills than Lucas, going off Lucas’ messy shotgunning in episode 1, and then Lucas also starts to rock out to the music and I’m kinda feeling secondhand embarrassment but also, I guess this means they’re meant for each other?

Clip 8 - Piano man

They’re both sitting there stoned as fuck, Eliott doesn’t want to get up to change the record, so Lucas gets up and puts the record to the side. But instead of selecting a new one, he lifts the lid the piano and asks Eliott if he plays. Eliott says he can play the Star Wars theme - so he has Star Wars fanboying in common with Even, heh.

Lucas then sits down and starts to play perhaps too well for someone who’s probably pretty stoned by now (but I’ve never tried so who knows) and Eliott sits up. We get him smiling at Lucas, eyes shining. At one point Lucas looks behind him and seems to get encouraged by Eliott’s enchanted reaction.

Mmmm ... unpopular opinion, but while this is a really lovely scene, I kiiiinda wish they’d taken it down a notch or put the focus more on Lucas? Because there’s like ... not really any ambiguity about what Eliott feels after this, with his enamored stare at Lucas, and I think in context of the larger story, it takes a little tension out. I think with Even, the attraction was conveyed more in small looks and glances, and while I definitely thought he was always into Isak, from Isak’s POV you could see how the arrival of Sonja threw that into doubt, there was room to question whether Even really had feelings for Isak. Whereas here it’s like ... girlfriend or not, Eliott is smitten with Lucas, I don’t really feel that the ending reveal carries as much weight. I guess I’d put more focus on Lucas’ expressions as he plays, showing him getting into it and letting himself put down his emotional walls and express himself, showing him more open here with Eliott than he’s been so far anywhere else - this is his POV season, after all - and cut back on Eliott’s reactions to preserve a little mystery.

What I think is good about this moment is that Eliott got to share a part of himself, with his drawings (and his questionable taste in music), and unbeknownst to him his Polaris project, and now Lucas gets to share a part of himself with his piano playing, and so they’ve both let each other in to their artistic sides, perhaps establishing them both as creative types. It’s cool that we both see their respective interests. They might even complement each other’s, like Lucas’ music might end up serving Eliott’s vision for his film or something. And this was obviously a turning point for Eliott, he may have noticed Lucas on the first point of school but this is what took his interest in Lucas to another level as he saw Lucas just unleash this piano piece, catching him off guard with something beautiful.

When Lucas is done, Eliott says it was impressive, and that Lucas is surprising, and he likes surprising people. Well they’re just being blatant as fuck, aren’t they.

Unfortunately, the night must end as Eliott has people to meet and Lucas has a party to endure. Eliott walks Lucas out and says it was great, they need to hang out again, Lucas agrees. I like this moment a lot because it is somewhat more ambiguous - like on the surface this could be a platonic conversation, just wanting to hang out as friends, but there’s just a little too much intensity, a bit too much of a pause in the delivery, to think this exchange is so casual.

Just as Lucas is going Eliott adjusts his hair? I don’t even know what he was doing because I do not notice a single change in Lucas’ hairdo but Eliott sure did it as a memorable parting gesture. Lucas is internally screaming, probably.

Lucas goes out the door and outside he checks his phone, of course Chloé is pissed, Yann asks why Lucas is lying, Chloé has been posting “men are trash” messages on IG. I repeat: just tell them that you have unstoppable explosive diarrhea and people won’t be so quick to judge.

Behind him, Eliott leaves his place and Lucas sees him greet a girl with a kiss. OK now that is actually a pretty big change because Eliott does not know that Lucas saw him with a girlfriend and like, I always thought Even was overcompensating with Sonja when he started to compliment her and make out with her, but Eliott was just casually greeting his girlfriend with a kiss, without knowing Lucas was there. He’s not going to know Lucas knows about his girlfriend the next time they meet. If Lucas is irritated with him, he’s going to be like WTF.

There’s piano music at the end, and with its inclusion in the clip itself, I’m thinking they’re going to use a lot of piano on the soundtrack this season. They already did it in episode one.

Social Media/General Comments

Lucas apparently ran away from Chloé at the bus stop, heh. She texted him to “subtly” see if he wanted to hang out and insinuated that she wanted to swing by Lucas’ flat some time. Or not subtly. Nothing about her is subtle. She’s wearing a sign that says BANG ME LUCAS.

Lol, as I mentioned above, Emma was hanging out with Raptor Alex and posting pics and stories on IG, I don’t know why they’re surprised people might think they’re an item after they also just hooked up at a party. Like not necessarily together-4ever but it’s not an unreasonable assumption they have a ~thing.

Lucas and Imane laugh over the tampon thing via text later, it’s a sweet moment. I wonder how they’re going to play the religion discussions since the two are already warming up to each other, Lucas being like, “Why are you religious?” in a confrontational way would kill the vibe.

Manon was supposed to see The Book of Mormon with Charles, then later she posted “Night in after all.” Dramaaaaa. Manon, fuck Charles and go by yourself. If some dude bailed on me that night I’d be like, whatever asshole, we paid to see these singing Mormons and I am going to goddamn see some singing Mormons. (Also, lmao at her dramatically posting that publicly, talk about a passive-aggressive swipe at Charles.)

Let’s talk about Basile, goddamn Basile, because he is by far my biggest issue with the season so far. Everything else is pretty solid, any other quibbles I have pale to my rapidly developing kneejerk GTFO when he appears on screen.

Some of the issue is that this dude is so one-note and in a really intense way, like you know when you’re a toddler and your parent hands you a pot to bang on and you hit it with a wooden spoon over and over? That’s Basile. There’s also just the element of overexposure. He tends to take over the boy squad scenes just because he wants to get laid. It feels like we’ve already had as much of Basile thirsting after Daphne and Maria in two episodes as we did Magnus crushing on Vilde spread over the whole season.

You might say Magnus was similarly desperate to hook up with a girl, and that’s true of course. And look, Magnus isn’t perfect and he said some dumbass shit during the season, but at the same time, there was a kind of weird innocence to him? Even when Vilde is complaining about the first year girls taking the older guys, and he says he’s available to fuck if she wants, it’s an outrageous statement but the way it’s played has a bizarre purity to it, like hey, this girl thinks there won’t be anyone for her to fuck, I should offer! With Basile there’s more sleaziness to his behavior, like dude has been on Reddit too long and has read too many forums about embittered men seeking to get laid.

I think some of it also is that a lot of Magnus was not actively and aggressively pursuing specific girls and bothering them for the most part - after that first offer to fuck Vilde, we don’t see him nagging her or crossing her boundaries, from what I recall? The flirtation gets mutual. He mentions stuff like the Vilde sex dream to the guys but it’s not like he’s telling that to her. With Basile he’s directly going after Daphne in a very persistent way.

One way they could redeem Basile is have his behavior act as a criticism of toxic straight boy bullshit, to go along with the heteronormative pressure. We still have a bunch of episodes to go so perhaps Basile will have character growth.

One thing I didn’t care for was them breaking up the Friday clip into multiple parts and airing them one after the other. I suspected that it was due to time restrictions and I was right, according to the screenwriter on IG. It’s too bad because I think it interrupts the flow of the story. With Skam, we got to see Isak himself change over the course of the afternoon - he went from shy and reserved to opening up and being able to laugh and joke around with Even, and the fact that it’s all one clip makes it more noticeable. The length makes it feel like the lazy afternoon Isak and Even spent getting to know each other. Not Skam France’s fault they had to break it up, just a shame because it felt choppier - watching it clip by clip meant I kept going back to what I was doing in real life and losing the mood instead of sinking into it. But I appreciate what they were trying to do when they couldn’t have a long scene and I think the ways they cut the scene were probably the best places to end/start the clips, tone-wise.

On that note, I’m trying to avoid the BTS commentary but I ended up reading it when I saw the reaction to the Skam France writer’s thoughts on Isak. I get what the guy was going for, Isak was more reserved and shy than Lucas is and Even was doing a lot of the initiating, although yeah, I think his description was worded in an oversimplified way - I don’t think Isak was entirely naive and innocent, more like inexperienced (which is a different thing) and he was certainly the hero of his own story, he was brave. Just because he wasn’t as outgoing doesn’t mean he wasn’t taking control of his own story - I’d say that’s part of what makes his character development so powerful, that because he is more repressed, his choices to kiss Even, to come out to his friends, to learn to be himself, have even more impact. But I don’t think Niels meant to bash Isak or anything, and it’s very clear from his notes that he loves and respects the original season. I think his main point was just like “Lucas is more upfront in his actions,” lol.

Though on a related note, the experience of watching the remakes has made me think that a lot of people don’t get who Isak is as a character, and especially have some extremely bad faith and unsympathetic readings of him. But that’s a rant for another time.

Tbh I think the behind-the-scenes notes about production stuff like “Axel wasn’t a trained pianist but he practiced hard for this scene” is fine and fun, it’s more the stuff that’s like “Here’s the interpretation of the scene itself” that I wish would wait until the season ends. But lmao, I’m just gonna try to avoid that stuff again.

I actually did like this episode. I’m not sure Skam France is ever going to be my favorite remake, because there’s something about the way it’s filmed that feels more slick and well, TV-like than is my preference, but I can definitely see that they’ve upgraded from last season, and that they’re trying hard to give this story its own spin. The Polaris symbolism is the biggest sign of that so far.

If there’s something I do wish we could get more of with Skam France, it’s subtlety? As a show it often feels more dramatic and this episode leaned heavier on the blatant romance, which might be a cultural thing, and I can absolutely get why people are more drawn to that. There’s plenty of TV shows and movies that I like that are not subtle in the slightest. I guess I’ve just been thinking that I wish the remakes would not be afraid to rely more on subtext for parts of this season, especially building up this relationship. Like there’s nothing blatantly “romantic” about the Evak version of this clip - everything is heavily show don’t tell, and we have to read into the littlest moments, the shared glances. How Even smiles to himself for just a brief moment after Isak compliments his drawings, or how Isak gets flustered after Even teases him for not knowing who Nas is (because he wants Even to think he’s cool) and how Even says that they’ll listen to Nas later - the implication that Isak is going to stay a while and Even will share this with him. “We can’t go back now” is in relationship to the cheese toasties, except you know, it’s not really about the cheese toasties. With Lucas and Eliott, it’s really easy to pick out that Eliott is flirting when he’s flat-out telling Lucas how special he is and how he’s intrigued by him, and sure, that’s where they’re going with Eliott’s character and making him more direct but it’s also related to the overall method and effectiveness of the storytelling. (I mean ... having Eliott be like “You are this-and-that, Lucas” is the definition of telling, not showing, lol.) And I completely get why that works for a lot of people, it doesn’t NOT work for me, but the understated stuff is what makes me watch clips a dozen times to pick up on it all, the subtext is what gets under my skin. My favorite moment was their goodbye at the door because it was a typical friendly exchange on the surface but with more going unspoken, and I felt that on the screen. So not to whine, because I did legitimately enjoy the Lucas/Eliott interaction, those are just my preferences. (The show is not made for me personally etc etc., cultural differences etc etc. I’m aware.)

I am finally warming up to Lucas, after two seasons. I really don’t think that I didn’t care for him before just because his character was closed off and snaky, because I’ve liked every other Isak in the first season of their show even though they’ve also kept secrets and done shady shit. I think they’ve just found a way to portray his character more effectively after having to copy + paste S1 and S2. They can make the character feel more organic. Also, not gonna lie, it felt like they cut back on the serial killer looks (partially because Lucas has more smiley and relaxed moments) so A+ work, Axel.

Also, knowing that they had to redo the first two seasons so closely doesn’t really change my opinion of the quality of the first two seasons, but it does make me more sympathetic toward the cast and crew for having to color inside the lines, so to speak.

Eliott is a fucking weird ass human being and I’m really feeling his character. They made his absurdly good looks more approachable by turning him into a dubstep-stanning furry, and I am here for whatever shit they tell us about him next.

I also think think the use of music was much better than in previous seasons. There were some very deliberate choices in this episode, obviously, but it felt like they’re learning to use silence more effectively and not shoehorning the soundtrack as much.

Feel free to chime in or correct me about French culture/translation/other issues.

If you got this far, thank you for reading!

#skamfr reactions #skam france reactions

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ghinanotlinetti · 5 years ago

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Things My Parents Did and Didn’t Teach Me

Hi! For this post I thought I'd do an exercise from one of my favourite podacats, On Purpose with Jay Shetty, from the episode titled: 6 Reasons Why We Need to Develop the Emotional Skills Our Parents Never Had. For this episode, Jay recommended listeners to create two lists: things we learnt from our parents, and things we taught ourselves. This exercise is helpful in our self-reflection and character development; it makes us realise that we shouldn’t take the valuable lessons that we passed on to us from our parents for granted, and it’s not the duty of our parents to provide us with the utmost perfect childhood and equip us with ever life hack, life lesson, emotional skills, because this is difficult to learn on our own, let alone teach a child. I’ve been living on my own for over four years now, it’s been a crazy wild journey, so I’ve been taking as much time as I need to process and figure out myself for myself and the people that I love. Here is my list and my take on the exercise:

Things my parents taught me

So just to be straight forward, I grew up with relatively strict, conservative Muslim, Asian parents. I’ve been through the typical stereotype aspects of this upbringing, I can’t say my experiences came under the extreme cases nor are they the polar opposite, but with that being said, there’s a lot more to it than the stereotype you see online, it’s never black and white. For those who may be unfamiliar with this childhood, let me briefly explain. Strict Asian parents are not the most gentle and affectionate parents, they have a weird way of showing that they love you and care for you. So their children would tend to chase success in greatest form success can come because they feel like only then will they be able to receive affection. Asian parents also have a tendency to have an obsession with controlling their children’s lives. In conservative Muslim households, some parents might use religious duty to manipulate their children. It isn’t uncommon for people with this upbringing to recall their parents pushing them that they had to do a certain thing because if they didn’t not only would they go to hell but their parents will also go to hell in the afterlife. There’s definitely a great level of pressure to fulfill great expectations, which is unfortunate because not everyone is blessed with opportunities and privileges in this life to exceed societal expectations. Sometimes I feel like it’s not the fault of the parents or the kids; there’s some parents who tell their kids “no, I don’t want you doing x” and the kid doesn’t even think of arguing back because the thought can’t even cross their mind, and in retrospect you never really know maybe the parent is willing to change their viewpoint had they made a sound argument in support of doing x because let’s be completely honest, parents don’t fully know what’s best for their kids and aren’t always right.

My parents taught me the basics of how to be responsible, hard-working, and have respect for others and one’s self. Growing up I always knew being kind, genuine, authentic, spiritual, and patient was the key to living a peaceful life. As a child I was disciplined to the point where I felt shame and humiliation a bit too much, I would say it got unhealthy at a point so I could never discipline my own children, should I have them in the future, in the same way that my parents did to me. I couldn’t learn how to trust them as a kid. As said in the podcast a great many of children don’t learn trust from their parents, which is a shame but it also doesn’t mean that we’re doomed because it’s never to late to start again. If I have children, I wouldn’t use fear and manipulation as the first and ultimate tool for getting my children to listen, I want them to respect me but I also want them to trust me to the point where they know in their hearts they can come to me at any given situation and time and I will be there for them.

I thank my parents every day for teaching me how to have a night routine; this has always kept me focused and I never actually appreciated it at the time. I have struggled with sleep as an adult but I would think back to what my parents taught me and get my ass back on the line by working on routine. I also have to thank my parents so much for giving me a love of reading and observation, because this has always kept my mind sharp and steady. I loved quiet time as kid and continue to now, it goes hand-in-hand with self-care so although self-care wasn’t explicitly taught it was indirectly taught to me by my parents. I dread to think of where I would be if my parents didn’t teach me how to love God. Teaching me to be a dedicated worshipper of God was one of the greatest gifts my parents gave to me because it’s always given me hope and lightness in my life. I learnt about my Indonesian-Acehnese culture and tradition from my parents. They taught me about my family lineage, how to be proud of where and what we came from because life is a journey about finding your way back, back to home, back to beginnings, back to God. My ethnic features as a kid used to be an insecurity of mine. This lesson was one that I took for granted and had to relearn from looking back at how my parents raised me. It since has become my source of strength. I used to hate my big ethnic nose, now I love my ethnic features for what they are because they represent my Arab lineage and what I came from. I’m even thankful for the important lesson of how to cook rice the proper way taught by my parents so I don’t have to learn the BuzzFeed way, which is horrendous. Now that I’m pondering, I think I got my sense of humour from my parents. My parents just know how to tell funny stories, always had a knack for storytelling. My mum does the best imitations of people that are just spot on. I always love talking to my parents when I’m not home. So that’s some of the valuable lessons my parents taught me. Moving on to what I taught myself...

Things I taught myself

I knew the basics of good work ethic, responsibility, and independence from my parents but I would say that I mastered those things for myself in my young adult years. This was done by trial and error, and also observing my close peers who I admire and look up to. How to live alone is also taught through trial and error experiences, it can't truly be taught from mere theory. I expanded my love of reading and read in all areas I could, although I still need to work on my reading habits. I love reading but sometimes I’d rather waste my time watching YouTube videos, I know, I really shouldn’t but I can’t help it sometimes! I knew the importance of loving God but my parents taught me strictly by the book from the Islamic teachings. Nothing wrong with that but I decided I could do more so I dived in much deeper in faith and spirituality and grew to love meditation because it kept me calm and helped me check in with my intentions. Self-love is a difficult concept to grasp because of all the unlearning which needs to be done, and personally I think the best way to approach self-love is in the self-discovery journey, so I don’t think my parents would be able to teach me this. As I’ve mentioned before trust is difficult to learn, it needs the relationship to be balanced and balance comes from seeing the other as an equal. I’m still learning to be good with money but so are my parents, and I’m glad we get to learn together. Stress and anger management is another thing I struggle with, but so do my parents and other people around me. Perhaps I could’ve benefited if I was introduced to meditation and breathing technique at an earlier age because this would be helpful for me as a child to manage stress and social anxiety. They say that social anxiety is inherited and I can see that in my parents and me. We’re all getting better at it, Alhamdullilah, but I shouldn’t have overthought my friendships and have as much social anxiety as I did back then. I was too anxious to let myself enjoy life's moments at times, and today I still feel like I'm doing this. I was never taught Indonesian history as a kid from my parents. I barely knew anything about my country being an expat. Nothing wrong with this but it was something I had to learn later on, glad it happened that way if I’m being honest because it meant that I was able to critically analyse whilst also taking in information. I knew I was fairly familiar with indifferent cultures and traditions because I grew up in a multicultural/multinational community, but I was tested to the limit in my learning of acceptance when I travelled in my uni days. This doesn’t just apply to people’s cultures but also people’s mindset. I've met so many different types of people through travelling and boy did I mert some crazy people over the years, but thank god for the crazy good people I've met along the way!

I’m not in any way resentful of my parents for not teaching me these things. Maybe with some of these things I as frustrated at the beginning and I may have lashed out at my parents out of stress because I didn’t know what to do with what I felt. But I’ve learn to let my emotions pass because they are afterall temporary. By doing this exercise, I know that I need to love my parents not for what they are, but for who they are. I hope to make my parents proud of me, not for my accolades but for who I’m capable of becoming. If you’re interest in doing this exercise, I hope you get to do so and share with as many people who might benefit from this too! Also before you do so I recommend to heck out On Purpose with Jay Shetty on podcast streaming platforms, go to the episode titled 6 Reasons Why We Need to Develop the Emotional Skills Our Parents Never Had and have a listen. Whilst you’re at check all other episodes too because they’re really good for self-reflection!

#on purpose with jay shetty #jay shetty #podcast #wellness #self-development #parents #emotional skills #mental health #upbringing #childhood #reflection #self-reflection #asian parents #ghinawrites

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