#The amount of info missing or wrong???????? 😭😭
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I didn’t know the dunmesh fanwiki situation was so dire.
#The amount of info missing or wrong???????? 😭😭#Are u not even gonna *mention* Dandan on Chil’s profile. Sick and twisted#Need to remember that xkcd geochemists comic about overestimating average knowledge. It’s fine I’m fine#So. This is the enemy i must slay I see. My rival mayhaps. The state of dunmesh fandom understanding hm.#Need to step up my game. There is so much info on Chil’s history that’s straight up unmentioned including basics like living in Kahka Brud#I’ll have to rework my masterpost to be more comprehensive & straightforward & short my god I didn’t know it was so bad#Joker laugh#i don’t want to edit the fanwikiiii i did it once for him being underweight and that was my contribution bye#To paint you a picture i checked his profile to double check if we’ve had confirmation of which daughter gave him his cowl & when#but the profile straight up doesn’t mention from who he got it. Which we know to be one of his daughters. HIS ICONIC ITEM.#ONE OF FEW FAMILY INFO AND TRIVIA HE STRAIGHT UP STATES. UNWORTHY OF MENTION????
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☆ the wrong way to hard launch (5) | OP81
summary : oscar's girlfriend is a walking pr problem for literally everyone (including herself) social media au
pairing : oscar piastri x zhou!fem!singer!oc
a/n formula 1's 'newest' WAG makes her race debut and gives her cousin a headache
i did actually screech like a parrot watching this race and then immediately adjusted some of my predictive writings
masterlist | last part | part 5 | next part
TWITTER
F1 WAGS @f1wagnews · 3h Selina Bui spotted around the paddock!
pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 2h the royal couple of australia (i don't make the rules 🤷♀️)
↳ kayla @luna_apocolypse · 2h why... did she wear blue...? she knows basic color theory... right??? ↳ pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 2h i completely missed that... SILENA??? ↳ kayla @luna_apocolypse · 2h HER ASS IS NOT ENDING UP IN THE PAPAYA GARAGE IN THAT DRESS 😭 SHE'S NOT THAT DUMB IS SHE???
MANIFESTED OSCALINA | LONDON N3 @12m0red4ys · 26m SCREECHING RN we used to dream of these days
↳ lina bui x2 grammy winner @urdaisea · 25m '2-time grammy award winner' HELL YEAH SHE IS ↳ MANIFESTED OSCALINA | LONDON N3 @12m0red4ys · 26m the most employed wag in formula 1 🫶 (lily is a close 2nd)
oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 13m HELP HAS ANYONE ELSE SEEN THAT CLIP OF LINA AND THE CHINESE INTERVIEWER 😭 ↳ oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 13m [translation] interviewer: this is your cousin's 3rd f1 season, how come you've never come support him? lina: he said he doesn't like my nagging interviewer: then will you be supporting zhou guanyu in shanghai? his home race could use some family support lina: even if he asked me to visit, there's nothing i can do, i'm in shenzhen performing a sold-out concert ↳ clovie @ luvyouvie · 7m she's so done lmao what can she do if zhou doesn't want her there ↳ emme @flowersforcami · 5m lina: i'm fucking busy too, have you considered that??
INSTAGRAM
selinabui just posted to their story
(translation: Brother Yu [Zhou Guanyu], come and save me)
TWITTER
rubyyy @piastriworld · 2h oh wait shit she's cute as fuck what ↳ rubyyy @piastriworld · 2h fyi this is abt lina bui ↳ rubyyy @piastriworld · 2h i was kinda expecting a full-on rockstar but she's super soft???
piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 1h the same woman not even 12hrs later
clara @ zgy24 · 37m i do actually think it's insane we got an 'oscar piastri's partner' graphic before we got a 'zhou guanyu's cousin' graphic ↳ clara @ zgy24 · 37m selina dear, we know you can't stand him but we're sure he'd appreciate it if you popped by the kick garage on your way over 🫶 ↳ lina !!! @EB_selina · 17m you sound like my mother but i'll have you know he sent me this:
很油腻 directly translates to 'very greasy' but it basically means 'ew' or 'cringe'
↳ clara @ zgy24 · 15m LMAO OH MY BAD ↳ xixi²⁴ ⁴⁴ @grandegrid · 14m the sheer amount of info you get from these two ss 😭 like ofc they use wechat, zhou guanyu sounds like an annoying older brother, she calls him 鱼哥, she trolls the emperor nickname, THE PURE SIBLING DYNAMIC IS EVERYTHING ↳ ZG24 future WDC · @zhoupdates · 14m zhou cousins crumbs 💚
lina !!! @EB_selina · 29m mistakes were made, the blue dress and orange-- sorry, PAPAYA headphones are not a look 💀 ↳ lina !!! @EB_selina · 28m wonder if it's too late to sneak into the sauber garage... ↳ pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 12m i'm actually wheezing at this bc that's EXACTLY what my oomf said when ur pics first dropped ↳ lina !!! @EB_selina · 10m well i wish ur oomf gave me a heads-up before i left the hotel
INSTAGRAM
selinabui
liked by zhouguanyu24 and 112,385 others
selinabui went on a tour around the paddock (finally visited the man racing with my number 🫶) tagged: zhouguanyu24 and logansargeant
pi4str1 babygirl, i think you wandered the wrong way
pastry81 oscar's girlfriend meeting oscar's boyfriend
zhouguanyu24 我给了你一个愿望 trans: i gave you one job/i had one wish ↳ selinabui @ zhouguanyu24 你是不是我的亲表哥! trans: are you even my cousin!
logansargeant This feels like an achievement ↳ selinabui @ logansargeant it is, stay slaying cap, so glad to see you race today 🫶
no2argeant logan getting a double feature over her cousin mhm those are mutuals via oscar frfr (loscar and oscalina and... lolina?) ↳ selinabui @no2argeant we use selogan but lolina is 100x cuter
TWITTER
piaa⁸¹ @papayaeightyone · 3h HELP SHE ACTUALLY SNUCK INTO THE SAUBER GARAGE
xixi²⁴ ⁴⁴ @grandegrid · 2h both cousins are equally unserious bc why did i remember the 'who's the most famous person in ur contacts' thing kick sauber did and why did zhou say jj lin when his very famous GRAMMY WINNING cousin seems to regularly bug him on the daily ↳ pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 2h he probably forgot lmao it's like she's not famous in his eyes "oh lina? u mean my annoying little cousin? oh right, she's a rockstar or smth"
oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 2h ok i'm convinced she's gonna stay in the williams garage now like it's almost guaranteed she's not headed back to mclaren ↳ oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 2h oscar, honey, come over and remove ur girlfriend from the williams garage, she's yapping with logan ↳ oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 8m I JUST SAW LINA'S POST 💀💀 y'know she's right, lolina is cuter than selogan but now i need to know how much logan's been 3rd wheeling
kayla @luna_apocolypse · 16m oscar checking his socials and it's his fans debating on the best ship name for his girlfriend and bestie
MESSAGES
from the phone of selina bui
TWITTER
oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 1h realising that lina being at the race means we're probably not gonna get her entertaining af f1 live-tweets
↳ oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 1h no joke, we missed out on aus gp live-tweets bc she was flying to jakarta but the saudi gp tweets gave me LIFE
INSTAGRAM/MESSAGES
from the phone of logan sargeant
TWITTER
oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 39m red flag??? already??? we just started??? ↳ oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 34m they cut to lina in the mclaren garage and i'm wheezing she looks so amused by the turn of events 😭
jess @OPIXSTRI · 3m oh they knew what they were doing cutting to selina bui after zhou guanyu retired ↳ jess @OPIXSTRI · 3m new f1 reaction pic just dropped guys, perfectly summarises the kick sauber saga
↳ kayla @luna_apocolypse · 2m obsessed with her refusal to wear the orange headphones genuinely think she would rather go deaf than have those pictures circulate the internet
xixi²⁴ ⁴⁴ @grandegrid · 5m we got the zhou guanyu's cousin graphic but at what cost
↳ Stake F1 Team KICK Sauber @stakef1team_ks · 18m We're sorry to let you down 😔 ↳ lina !!! @EB_selina · 17m i don't care which long-suffering intern this is. get out. ↳ oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 20m lmao lina's sauber pit stop tweets vs oscar's f3 drs tweets, fight 🤣
INSTAGRAM
selinabui Suzuka, Japan
liked by eb_jonno and 200,371 others
selinabui loved the experience, will not be going to another one bc i'm 94% sure i jinxed EVERYONE i hold dear in this sport - stay safe out there 👍 see y'all in seoul in 2-3 business days <3 tagged: mclaren and oscarpiastri
logansargeant You did *not* jinx anyone ↳ selinabui @ logansargeant logan, honey, i'm a bit depressed about you but sure man, whatever you say :'(
ninisf1diary how'd you find your first ever live race? ↳ selinabui @ninisf1diary very fun, loved the bit where oscar got to hop back into the garage after the first lap
mclaren Are we still gonna see you in Imola 🥺 ↳ selinabui @ mclaren i think oscar is gonna drag me over kicking and screaming but i guess i'll be there
✧・゚: ✧・゚:✧・゚: ✧・゚:✧・゚: ✧・゚:
taglist @ririyulife @ashy-kit @fionaschicken @namgification
#f1#oscar piastri#oscar piastri x oc#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri fanfic#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri smau#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 smau#f1 fic#f1 smau#f1 imagine#f1 social media au
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Holy ok ok ok so I just read your dev having trouble with being around Cosmo and Wanda but I bring you a different approach. What if he is mad at them! Trying to shift some of this huge amount of guilt because at least he went to Peri! His own parents left him alone to die. (I can’t remember if you said if they actually knew where he was or not)
Oh lordy oh ok gewze imagine Dev having this moment of realising he has something in common with Peri because he sees his parents as neglecting him. How sad would that make Dev? To realise how much guff he gave Peri cause he thought Peri couldnt relate at all. So he pushed him away but then thinking how wrong he was and how Peri did understand. (Even though we know cosmo and wanda are nothing like Dale and really did love Peri just saw a different priority) but the potent agnst of Dev having a miss understanding of it. Everytime Peri tries to deny it Dev relates. Everytime Cosmo and Wanda gush over Peri makes Dev fume because he sees it as all a show. He thinks he knows how it is behind closed doors. Even if hes actually wrong. It could really help them bond. Until Dev finally sees hes wrong and it’s gonna make a huge rift between them as he blames Peri for pretending to have a bad relationship with his parents. Probably saying it was to “mock” Dev or something.
On another note. Do you think Peri would actually be upset that his parents decided to save fairyworld instead? Maybe rationally he tells himself it was the better choice. That it was what ended up bringing him back. It was what saved all the other fairies who take priority. Hes just one guy. But thats still gonna hurt. Knowing your own parents can and have picked the masses over you. Knowing you arent worth the world to them. Of course he wouldnt actually expect them to choose him but maybe deep down he wanted them to? Idk im loosing it cause I just got off ruff 12hr shift at work lol.
Hope this isnt too off the money for your au I just really enjoy angst
~hollys fairy hell
[AU info here!]
OOOOHHH... THIS IS INTERESTING. WHILE C&W DIDN'T KNOW THAT PERI DIED, DEV BEING ANGRY BECAUSE OF THAT IS... OUGH. I think it DOES check out, actually. Feeling angry that they didn't even KNOW their son died, the blame being shifted to help ease the guilt... IT MAKES SENSE, AND IT'S IN CHARACTER.
He's seen their relationship before, and he knows that they're all such a genuinely happy family, and that makes him feel not ONLY GUILTIER, but MORE FRUSTRATED, MORE ANGRY. Their own son DIED, in front of HIM, and they DON'T EVEN KNOW.
HEAR ME OUT... DEV NOT KNOWING THAT C&W DON'T KNOW UNTIL PERI MENTIONS IT. Him assuming that they ALREADY told their parents, and that's why he was absent for a few days. THE GUILT SHIFTING INTO A MISDIRECTED ANGER ONCE PERI MENTIONS THAT THEY DON'T KNOW AND THAT THEY WANT TO KEEP IT FROM THEM... of COURSE, the guilt is still there, but it blends in with the other feelings and it's a Very Complicated Feeling Soup.
THE MISUNDERSTANDING IDEA IS NEAT... AND IN-CHARACTER. I don't know for SURE how I'd implement it [because my brain is very picky about the things I add, and I am too...], make it go, and ALL those good, delicious, juicy things, BUT BUT it will go on the backburner of thoughts. Specifics would probably just come to me randomly at 2 am like they have been lately gHDLSHSLHD 😭
WITH THE LAST PART... PERI DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED SPECIFICALLY. He was DEAD, after all, and SURE, he'd probably find out via things being talked about, BUT, GENERALLY, I DON'T THINK THEY ADDRESS OR THINK ABOUT THOSE THINGS.
Hazel's Wish fixed EVERYTHING that happened in the episode, and I talk about how the whole Millio Wishes Thing worked here, actually! I have a vague idea of how things go with Peri after they come back, but I don't have any set in stone ideas yet/there's no established timeline. I think... THEY don't even know at first, they're just confused at the fuzzy gaps in their memory and then, once they get a closer look at themself and the GHOST thing happens [when they're alone] and all that... THEN they put details together and realize they They Fucking Died.
WHICH... PERI DOESN'T UNPACK THAT. NOT MUCH, ANYWAY. The finale ends as usual, with the motorcycles and all that— that's BEFORE he realizes there might be something off. DO YOU GET ME... LIKE...
THE ENDING ESTABLISHES THAT THINGS ARE OK AND NORMAL BUT THEN AFTER THE EPISODE, THEY GO BACK TO THEIR HOUSE/ROOM/C&W'S HOUSE [ALONE] AND THEN THAT IS WHEN HE KIND OF REALIZES HE FEELS OFF AND WEIRD. AND... OUGH. YEAH.
SORRY I'M... GETTING OFF TRACK. I don't think he'd be upset, not in that way, at least, given the circumstances. I DON'T KNOW IF THIS MAKES SENSE OR IF IT'S JUST WORD SOUP I'M SO SORRY I JUST WOKE UP LIKE AN HOUR AGO. I am throwing words at the wall and hoping they make sense HDJDDGKDDUI 😭
#anonymous#ask#au info#petrified!peri au#fop au#fairly oddparents#fairly oddparents a new wish#fairly oddparents: a new wish#fop#fop a new wish#fop: a new wish#fop:anw#periwinkle fairywinkle cosma#cosmo fairywinkle cosma#wanda fairywinkle cosma#dev dimmadome
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pavitr prabhakar ★ general headcanons
content/warnings: implied/mentions of death (his parents+uncle), mentions of bullying, gayatri x pavitr, written by a coconut who is not indian PLS CORRECT ME!!
a/n: the sunny boy himself... (ugly crying) I LOVE HIM. loosely based off of the scraps of canon that i could find. maybe a little projection... (i am desi) atsv version pavitr! written at midnight and not very edited 💀
For some background, Pavitr was born in Southern India (likely Tamil Nadu or Kerala) so one of his first languages was Tamil! A village / small town boy at heart.
After his parents passed at a young age he moved to Mumbattan with his Aunt Maya and Uncle Bihm (of course) and it is very very different!!!
Obviously Pavitr has to learn Hindi and Marathi properly in order to fit in AND English my boy has to be multi-lingual from the start...
Even from early on Pavitr was bullied because he didn't fit in with the city kids. Gets called pagal Prabhakar (crazy Prabhakar — a bit like puny Parker?) and a slew of other names because of his accent, how he mixes up the languages, and the fact that he lives with his aunt and uncle rather than his parents.
Eventually by the time he's in his early teens he "assimilates" in terms of the language and culture but he's a scrawny kid so he still gets bullied... kids are ruthless bro don't you got the JEE to study for 💀
God forbid if anyone found out about his emo phase at that time... Pavitr's just getting onto social media and when he sees the emo subculture he just takes it and runs. (He stops out of embarassment when his Aunt Maya finds out why he's stealing her kajal... There are photos out there somewhere.)
Also meets Gayatri during his lil emo phase. Definitely a chill popular girl and definitely sticks up for him (it's giving Indian Forest Gump... does anyone know about that adaptation 😭)
He's a bit hesitant about Gayatri at first since the popular kids kind of dogpile on him all the time but eventually they become a little duo and he crushes HARD
Enter hopeless romantic Pavitr he is the embodiment of the song "Love Spell" by Param Pannu (Spotify link it's a BOP)
Plus you know he's in love when he admits he had an emo phase to you... in the middle of his emo phase. (Gayatri has all those pictures saved by the way.)
Then comes Mumbattan Visions Academy!! (according to the wiki that's where he goes.)
Of course we know that Pavitr is quite naturally smart so the entrance exam is no problem (RAFFLE BOY like Miles 😊😊😊)
But he is so super concerned about getting in with Gayatri so a few weeks before the exams they're studying together (doing anything but study)
My girl Gayatri is trying to help him out and he has no idea what she's saying and she's so smart and literally knows twice the amount of info you need to know so my boy Pavitr is sweating BULLETS the day before (exam is so easy he thinks he's sitting the wrong one LMAO)
Pavitr does NOT want to stay at the dorms he'll defo miss his auntie and uncle too much (and his auntie's cooking) but he begrudgingly goes anyway...
Enter NADEESH (his universe's Ned counterpart I totally just made up...)
They're roomies and Nadeesh is from Bengal and they actually bond quite easily considering they're not from Mumbattan he's a STEM boy and has a love/hate relationship with it (super smart though maybe just not at school... gadget stuff 😱)
Pavitr doesn't know a LICK of Bangla but Nadeesh teaches him some perhaps to rizz up Gayatri... (they're all vulgar or swear words or words Pavitr picked up from hearing Nadeesh's mum speak on the phone 💀)
SPEAKING OF GAYATRI yeah she's slaying school and also has a lil modelling thing going on too. STEM girlie and fashion girlie and knows multiple languages (her father knows a couple considering he's an officer)
Pavitr is a hopeless romantic but he's just hopeless when he asks her out in Bangla trying to be cool and doesn't realise he called her a whore... (he's so going to kill Nadeesh.)
She finds it HILARIOUS though and they start dating and everyone lived happily ever after and NO ANCIENT YOGI TIME MY BOY IS SPIDER-MAN NOW 🤯🤯🤯🤯
I think Pavitr's initial approach to being Spider-Man is very... impractical. Given he's just gotten his powers and gotten his naturally buff abilities and always amazing hair (yes that is part of his powers) (yes he asked the yogi for it), he's very spontaneous and disorganised. He probably has the stupidest most impractical suit and sweats like HELL in it (kind of like the one in the comics?) My boy's grades kind of take a hit and so does his little freshman year relationship with Gayatri.
My guy Nadeesh is chill though he knows instantly like Pavitr isn't subtle about it... (they're both night owls and Nadeesh is like cramming asf and Pavitr swings in without thinking and he's just like... "okay dude I have a physics exam tomorrow idgaf 😭 wait but that so cool though can I help—")
Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a— Okay his Uncle Bihm dies. You know how it goes.
Gayatri breaks up with him (it's exam season and she wants to "take a break".) His uncle is dead. He's flunking school (for real this time) Emo phase 2? Maybe not...
Pavitr ends up spending a lot more time with Maya and while he's a little irrationally spiteful he learns the importance of taking care of the little family he has left. Pavitr doesn't have the privilege of that multi-generational village household he had back when he was young, or parents like the rest of his classmates. It's just him and his aunt in that little apartment, a speck in the whole of Mumbattan, the place he has to protect and call home now.
Okay that got sad real fast but HE CHERISHES HIS AUNT hence why he always makes time to have chai with her, no matter how busy he is or how emo he's feeling.
His uncle Bihm had a couple traditional pieces of clothing and Maya makes him try them on. He feels a bit silly especially since he's gotten used to pushing away his culture and mainly speaking English at his new school but then his aunt starts tearing up and he starts tearing up and "you look just like your chacha" and UGH
After a while Pavitr gets himself together and decides to design himself a new suit. He takes inspiration from a couple of his uncle's fancier pieces and also Gayatri's first advert feature (my girl is going places!!!) so his outfit has a lot of meaning to him.
We gotta go BACK for the yo-yo though y'all. I'm so certain that Gayatri had a yo-yo when they were younger and he learnt it just to impress her... SO HE HAS A YO-YO AS PART OF HIS GEAR 😱😱😱
Of course these little signs add up and Gayatri is like half-sure he's Spider-Man (but not entirely cause when she's saved in the film she's a bit taken aback when he hugs her... my girl is smart but you always got a lil uncertainty!!! Maybe she figures it out after that though...)
Obviously he flunked those exams considering he was NOT studying while he was grieving and when Gayatri checks up on him he's of course not doing the greatest despite his little comeback. However...
"I can help you review if you want?" she asks him. Pavitr's smile comes back that day.
But my boy STILL CANNOT CATCH A BREAK because Gayatri's father gets promoted to Police Captain and is suddenly very protective of his daughter
There's a lot of awkward moments where Pavitr has to play off his association with Gayatri (puts the hopeless in hopeless romantic yet again.) No, she never told him they were dating before (and those pictures are in a SAFE trust) though they're not exactly dating now.
Gayatri is pretty indifferent about it all, to be fair. She doesn't exactly care if her father finds out (and hopefully she can tell him soon) but she also doesn't want her dad to be disappointed in her considering she looks up to him a lot.
A BIT OF GAYATRI HEADCANON but I feel like she's very academically gifted but doesn't exactly want to go into STEM? Fashion is her thing and she eventually might want to go into acting (like this girl in her classes called Meera Jain... OUUU rivalry but not really they're besties I fear)
Gayatri definitely gossips and gushes to Meera Jain about Pavitr like how he gossips and gushes to Nadeesh. They both give the other contrasting advice (they're still not together... SITUATIONSHIP 💀💀💀)
It's not as bad as when Pavitr called Gayatri a whore by accident but getting together again is definitely awkward when they go to get lassi at that very overpriced store that opened up that Pavitr most definitely cannot afford (smiles and fights to pay while a part of him dies inside)
Though their relationship is stronger this time! Pavitr does still have his secret as Spider-Man, but things are looking up! Especially when he finds out that he's not the only Spider-Man (ENTER ATSV CANON STORYLINE 😱😱😱)
Endless high school antics I love this dude and his lil friends
That's it for now I think THANK YOU FOR READING!! I so wish there was more content on him but I had to take matters into my own hands...
🕸️💫🪀
y'all better stop sleeping on pavitr now... HES SO AHHHH I LOVE HIM YOU DONF UNDERSTAND HES THE DUDE EVER
don't talk about my other wips. or why im uploading this at midnight.
ALSO if you are desi (particularly indian) please correct me OR FEEL FREE TO ADD ON i am so whitewashed and my boy needs to be done justice
reblogs so super appreciated! if you wanna read the rest of my atsv stuff click here :p
#pavitr prabhakar#atsv pavitr#pavitr x gayatri#spiderman india#pavitr prabhakar headcanons#pavitr my beloved#atsv#spiderman across the spiderverse#across the spiderverse#atsv headcanons#vhstown
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so like a week ago i watched a monster roadtrip gameplay just bc they have lambert in and i went to check the comment section just to find EVERYONE calling the lamb by he which okay, i thought that was such a weird and curious thing, so naturally i left a comment saying "the amount of people calling the lamb by he HUUUURTS" as in a funny way.
it was not taken in a funny way.
the op of the video answered me Very Seriously telling me that the devs call them by he, and so it was ok to call them by he. i was, or course, confused, since all content/mentions of the devs ive seen so far refer to them as well, them.
curious about where they got the info i answered that as far as ive seen massive monster goes they/them with the lamb, leaving it open to correction if i was wrong.
now im having a murder drones fan beefing with me for "pointing that out" like 😭 Honestly now im even more curious, i mean, ive only been in this fandom for like four months and the game is already two years old so there might be a chance that i Actually missed something on that front.
theres also the possiblity that they saw the devs calling them Lambert and Immediately assumed to go he/him on them wich is ???
a third possibility is that im overthinking this wayyy too much LMAO but nonetheless i wanted to share here.
like honestly to me theres nothing wrong with having your gender headcannons on your blorbos but 1) the lamb has been Incredibly Explicitly Stated as Non-binary almost everywhere i look and 2) that representation means the WORLD for me, for its thanks to the way the lambs gender is respected with absolute no questions in-game and throughout the fandom that i became more comfortable with myself and who i want to be, only resulting in making me feel kind of angry at seeing ppl so deliberately gendering them into what they assume is the 'correct' term djskfhkdhf but yeah i may be overreacting as far as im aware
#stfu hooks#vent#kind of?#i mean im not actually incredibly offended/angry#it just baffles me a little
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sometimes I feel like I'm missing out on Nicole's channel of communication with her fans because some fans have more info about her upcoming projects than I do.. maybe you know what we expect from her future art? and maybe you know how to endure this time? because lately it's her music that I need lol (maybe that's too blatantly idk)
i completely understand this message and i agree so much! i cannot wait till we get new music 😭
afaik she has posted some very limited info about a possible upcoming album BUT keep in mind that Natural Born Losers, Heart Shaped Bed, and Married in Mount Airy were all teased for sooo long before we got anything from them. We know that when MIMA came out we were told it was going to have a "feral sister"
about a month or two on instagram she posted a story about how difficult it is to record music with her pugs heavy breathing in the background and she's posted at least two very short and quiet snippets of new songs in ig stories as well. but so far that's all we've gotten.
i would love to get new music in 2025 but nicole is notorious for delaying albums for significant amounts of time and changing titles and themes along the way. we may get a track or two next year but i'm not hopeful for a full album until 2026-27 (but PLEASE let me be wrong)
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Canary goes missing for like months and they know that there's someone after her and price knows personally she's been abused and they think 'yeah she definitely hates us and betrayed us' like I get being cautious and she could be lying but like c'mon they aren't that oblivious let's put our thinking caps on lol like the bruises, the shoulder incident, the fact that he literally hunting for her??? Even if the whole 141+ didn't know price did and that's what pisses me off the most like dude you knew ??? He could have said something to ease the tension?? And heet other people infiltrate his mind like that fuck ass ghost don't even get me started on him like he lucky he's fictional otherwise I'd have a nice chat but they have a hefty amount of explaining and apologizing to do but that's even if they see what they did as wrong because so far their Ego's and trust issues are still so far up there asses they can't or don't want to think that Canary is actually just a victim
Anyways enough ranting lovely writing really got a physical and emotional reaction out of me 🫶🏾😭
right!! like that’s the thing, they’ve just found out that she’s graves’s wife and she tells them about how awful he was to her (something she’s already talked about to price privately) and she mentions specifically that he was manipulative, and they think that just because she looks okay on stage with graves that she’s been lying???? price and valeria know about the actual scar on her shoulder, where did they think that came from if she was lying???
and like if i were canary???? i would be so hesitant about accepting any kind of help from anyone in the 141 (with the exception of gaz ofc) or even beginning to trust them again. like yes, it’d probably be better being with them than with graves and makarov but there is a lot they’d have to do to make her even remotely comfortable talking about what happened or giving them info.
alskdjdhsj i’m glad you’re enjoying it enough to rant LOL
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I’ve missed you too!! Such a busy week has left me drained lol but seriously bestie chatting with you cheers me up every single time💕
You’re so real for skipping around the audio for the sweet parts lol especially when it comes to friends to lovers legit a trope I could ever get tired of!! I would say get into audio book but tbh sometimes the people narrating them are not the best… so yeah maybe stick to the audio porn lol also you’re writing something for Thursday?!? A WIN!!!!!!
Aren’t we all angsty girlies at heart?!! At least I know I am lol love the pain and distress lol made to be was just so so so good I know I say this often but I might just have to re-read! (And I genuinely do bc the amount of time I’ve re-read your stories is crazy lol) and the new teacherry won’t be dumb! And if it is who cares!! This is fiction so it doesn’t have to be groundbreaking at all! I know it won’t suck but I do understand how it can be hard to see the positives sometimes!
Cariño is a fave of mine for reasons idk why! There’s also beb��(baby), preciosa(precious), querida, mi reina(my queen, but tbh I’m not a fave of queen in general lol) but omg gatita IS SO FOR YOUR STOIRES😭 there’s probably a ton I’m blanking on lol mi vida is also such a classic that I love it too lol and I don’t think that you would offend anyone tbh! Plus if you want to use the restaurant storyline stuff like tacos and other food stuff is what sells ya know. I think as long as you don’t really enforce stereotypes(I doubt you will!) then you’re fine! Or I could also see the reason of him using Spanish nicknames would be maybe because he studied aboard? Or maybe just living in a place where they mainly spoke Spanish for a bit? Or he’s just crazy smart and learned the language on his own lol ANWAYS I fear i will once again die(good way)if you ever use a Spanish nickname!!
lol
I’ve had other 3 hour courses before and they can totally make or break how I retain the info. I always kinda feel like I wanna share about the cool topics but i definitely geek out about and I fear these little chants would become WAYY longer than needed lol but thank you!! Hopefully I’ll stay interested in it for at least half way through 😭
NOT THE NOSE😭( I SCREAMED) BESTIE DRAG ME HAHAHA (his nose is cute though so you’re right😔) but for him i find his hands the most attractive…he’s also tall and wears glasses so i fear i wont shut up about him lol and thank you for the lovely vibes!!
Oh think those colors would be so cool for you! Especially rn since i think thats what’s like popular I think? But im sure it will look lovely in theory lol it probably would be a shock for everyone but dare i say bestie i kinda love the idea of you doing that!! Yeah the upkeep and like special products once has to use to take care of the color can be a lot lol I LOVE the way the universe made you!!!
You’re so right about Cody lol and I can see the appeal of Ben but Josh… girl trauma lol I love a good sad character even if it hurts knowing about! There’s also nothing wrong taking the sperm donor route like I have done my research as well lol Also a honey prequel?!? THATS SUCH A GOOD IDEA!! And bestie honey is turning out great!I have no doubt the last few parts will be just the same! You are and have been capable of creating such lovely stories!
Understandable about the wedding! I can see the Most couple getting eloped or whatever since they are basically soulmates lol I can definitely see how the guilt of her leaving could prevent her from even enjoying being engaged or going through the wedding process. And you’re right Harry would marry her whenever and wherever lol oh that’s such a good way of grouping firefighters 😭
Retail therapy is always fun! But I totally get how it sucks when not even the sweet treats are working😭 sending you the best vibes to help your brain!! Also a trip to Salem sounds so fun!! Have you been there before? Fall very much seems like your season( plus your birthday is coming up soon-ish!!) and a mft update would be so good for fall!
I actually had a busy weekend! Went out with friends to a drag show on campus which was fun! Did some needed errands but sadly started to feel off bc of my period:( but I’m fine just in slight pain lol and this quarter I only go for 3 days so it’s not too bad! Though I do have to wake up really early and stay really late on campus which is lame! But typically I like to go everyday just so I can have consistency but it just depends on the classes tbh who knows how next quarter will be lol
Ahhh Sam my love I am wishing you the best start of the week! Missed you loads!! Sending you so much love bestie! Love you lots!!!-💜
I think I misspoke perhaps. I meant Thursday as in the date not my story. 🙃 This is a next-door neighbors he's obnoxious but hot, she's not falling for it but is. But it's a little heavy I think. And with the recent Honey update, I'm thinking maybe I'll skip it. We'll see if I throw something together. Y'all might get the last part of Honey on Thursday 🤭 I'm sure everyone's devastated.
Sometimes I write stuff and I'm like "Omg no one would ever do this or believe this" and I know that's kinda the whole reason for fiction, but yeah. I just don't want it to be ridiculous. I'm an angsty girl because I love solving problems (math people, am I right?) but I don't like when it's a prolonged problem I need it solved like ASAP. (I often skip ahead in books, even if it's just a couple pages or a chapter because I get so distraught 😭) and when the love is loving, I need to know it's going to get better.
Preciosa is also super cute! I am def not a fan of my queen. I love princess (thanks Niall). but other than that. GATITA FOR THE WIN. I love the idea of studying abroad Harry. Love that love that love that!
Even if you just give me like a tidbit to study and look up. Or I'll make another sideblog just for you to send anon messages and geek out about psych stuff. I'm down for whatever you just let me know!
I WASN'T DRAGGING I SWEAR 😭 I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE. Yes, hands, bless. I will not elaborate about hands, but you know. Everyone knows. GLASSES I'm S O L D. Please, do NOT shut up about him. I'm here for him.
I've been thinking about it more and more because I realized very recently my hair is all one color. Doesn't really photograph well. Idk. I don't photograph well at all. I think my whole aesthetic is "lovely in theory" 💀
I bet you're really kicking yourself that "honey is turning out great!" 🤭
Never been to Salem, no. Fall IS my season. I am a sweater, campfire, and bugs dying kind of girl. Apple picking? Say less. Basically, I want to be MFT mc and just live my best fall life.
I love that you still did fun things even if you're starting to feel off. It sounds like a fun weekend overall! I hope the pain continues to not be too bad. 3 days is a dream! I get the consistency. That's brutal for a sleep schedule. Can you sleep late on the days you don't have classes at least? But yeah, I get it. Some classes are such a drag!
LOVE YOU!
xoxo
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Hi! Guy who asked about Mutei/Azuma and, I mean this in the most respectful way possible because I do not have the databook (unfortunately) so a lot of stuff you said I virtually had no idea about: what the fuck.
(I wish I had more concrete wordings but I'm going to have to read everything again after the initial processing stage of 'what the fuck is the plot again?')
I think I understand now why you love Azuma so much. There's virtually no one that's close to being sane that has worked with Mutei. That sounds like a skill.
The chart you posted feels like it does make sense if you stare at it a while, by the way, even if unfinished - thank you for posting it!
And yes, stabbing someone is very yuri.
would it surprise you if i said there's very little mention of azuma in the databook...!! it's genuinely crumbs strewn about across the series!! and he does not make it easy given he seems to have had the precognition to wipe his name from empyrean, compared to misumi and igarashi who stand to lose much more than him being associated with a cult... though i guess both are so huge they can snuff it out. i would say the most information in the game(s) about azuma is probably in the dlc/hermit room but it is still not that much if at all. interlude is more like, a lot of implied stuff due to the nature of the settings in it but there is an outright mention of him (just a mention).
i got asked about azuma mentions before, but it's based on my memory alone so def not conclusive (it only mentions azuma himself, i didn't talk about indirect stuff like minoru talking about the publishing house for some reason, but eh...)
not only that but i think this is an issue in general, not just with azuma— a LOT of information is stuck on locked accounts and list/follower only stuff... also the fanbox... personally i only got into the series late late 2021 so i missed a lot of that. i only have access to the latest one. some korean fans compiled some stuff for their own ref and i've seen a few of those around but it can only go so far! but yeah there's a huge thing re:the dissemination of information. there is an entire hadal zone down there. there was a livestream where people got to see azuma (and igarashi).... and... and i didnt!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 at least from the descriptions it sounds like he looks very cute ...
though it's not really a big deal, for example a lot of information in the databook and other sources became widely known with the release of stuff like the interlude (and the reports in it), com info and reports, etc... im sure when com comes a lot more stuff will become more widely known! a surprising amount of stuff was setting up for the interlude and com.
either way, you end up having to put stuff together anyway. even outside of out of bounds info, sometimes just rereading over and over i realized there is something i absolutely overlooked or did not notice. there are parts of the interlude i think i have memorized atp because there's something deeply wrong with me. i think though among most things the dlc is what i've reread the least... i should probably revisit it again
i hope there's a fanbox post at the end of the year... 2023 is almost over... i can't take it anymore.... 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
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OMG YAY NEW UPDATE!!!! I WAS SO EXCITED WHEN I SAW IT!! OMG okay let’s unpack;
1) when I saw the German one of the riders spoke I got so excited 😭😭 idk seeing my language be spoken or written info books or fics is so exciting for me!!
2) OMG ALL THAT DAMN MAIL, LIKE GIRL PLEASE😭😭😭 the second hand embarrassment I get reading all those crazy stalker parts is insane 😭😭😭 she takes obsession to a WHOLE new level.. hell I’m not even that crazy LOL
3) I love how Adrien calmed Jade down?! Idk there was just something so sweet and sexy about him telling her he understood but there was no need for her to be upset at him!! Like Ik it wasn’t directed at him but it was kinda a sweet moment (and hot) for him to say it?! Idk am I crazy??! 😭😭🤭
4) I really liked how Jonathan was in regards to his daughter behaviour! I’m so glad he wasn’t one of those parents who always make excuses for their kids and never want to hold them responsible. I like that he understood what Serena was doing was wrong and that she needed help, I totally get him wanting to protect her as his daughter but I’m so glad that apologized on her behalf and is doing what he can to help the situation.
5) THE ENDING!!! BYE I’M SCREAMING!!!! Jade being dominant>>>> the amount of love I have for this woman is insane 😭😭😭 MOMMY JADE FOR THE WIN!! I will always be her #1 defender and same with Adrien!
6) I absolutely LOVED THIS!! I missed the updates and I can’t wait to read more!! You’re doing such an amazing job, everything is SO well written and interesting and you’re absolutely amazing for gracing us with these beautiful stories and chapters! 💗💗
Sky Full of Stars - Chapter Sixteen.
They're back, besties! I know people still have to catch up, but I can't hold it back any longer as it isn't fair to those who are up to date and waiting for new updates. I hope those who need to get caught up are able to do so soon and continue enjoying the story :)
Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen
Tag list - In the comments
Words - 3,542
Warnings - 18+ content throughout. Minors DNI!
It had taken a little jostling, but prior to their arrival in Vienna, Jade had also managed to secure two other guests for their tour of the Spanish Riding School, Jess and Sunni accompanying them, too. Jess had only discovered a love of horses in recent years, Jade’s estate manager Bob giving her lessons whenever she visited, as well as taking them back home whenever her schedule allowed. Sunni could appreciate beautiful horses as much as the next person, but exquisite architecture was where it lay for him, delaying his flight back to London in order to spend a little more time in Europe.
To say the surroundings were exquisite was putting it mildly, though. The school itself looked more like a palace, the four of them marvelling at the stunning elegance of the building as their guide, a man named Georg, greeted them outside, shaking everyone’s hand and welcoming them to the school.
The inside was mind blowing, from the beautiful arena the horses were exercised in right down to the immaculate stable blocks the magical looking, pure white steeds were cared for within, Georg proudly explaining the history as they walked from place to place.
“I would like you to meet Mia, Mrs. Brody. This is who you shall be riding today. She was recently brought up from our stud in the village of Piber, where all our horses come from,” he explained, smiling as Jade reached to stroke her muzzle.
“Please do call me Jade, Georg,” she began, the man nodding. “Oh, she’s absolutely beautiful. How old is she? And why is she used in the school when historically, you guys only use stallions?”
“She has just turned six and is showing great promise. She is here on a special exception. I will have her prepared for you, if you would like to wait at the top of the block, then Wolfgang will show you to the entrance of the school where you may join in on the exercise.”
At knowing she would be coming there prior to the tour’s commence, she’d brought with her jodhpurs, her riding hat and boots, waiting for Mia to be brought up with her while her husband and friends were shown to the seating area at the top of the arena. She was a little nervous, riding such a young horse and knowing of the complications that came with that, also feeling a little inferior to the other riders there.
“Do not worry, miss. She is like a lamb,” Wolfgang told her, giving her a leg up into the saddle, Jade adjusting her stirrups and tightening the girth buckles beneath the saddle flap before moving her forward, the kindly stable groom holding the entrance doors open. There she was, the girl from Tottenham, riding a purebred Lipizzaner mare into the most famous riding school in the world.
How was this her life?
“Guten tag, Frau Brody.” A few of the other riders greeted her with as they trotted past, all nodding politely as their steeds looked like they were floating on air. Letting Mia walk a little while, she then gathered her reins, nudging her heels into her sides, the horse moving on into a gentle trot. She soon realised she needn’t have worried, and that Wolfgang had been entirely correct; Mia was an absolute lamb, so flawlessly well mannered, doing everything Jade gave her the instruction to do immediately.
A photographer from the school followed her progress around the arena, taking pictures, a few of the other riders pausing to watch. They hadn’t actually expected the famous musician and actress visiting them to know what she was doing. While she wasn’t a patch on their status, she managed to work Mia through collected and extended trot and canter, passage, lateral movements in both trot and canter, and much to Jade’s delight, a few flying changes. This was the movement where the horse was asked to change its leading leg in the pace of canter, making them look to almost be skipping.
“I’ve never done these successfully before!” she squeaked while passing her little group, all of them clapping, Adrien in particular beaming with pride as he watched his wife enjoying herself. She spent a further twenty minutes having the time of her life, the instructor giving her some guidance and pointers before she rode over to the corner, beaming brightly.
“So, you like her, then?” Adrien asked, shaking a little look with Georg.
“Like her? Honey, I am in bloody love with her! She’s like riding a cloud! She’s such a good girl, too, she just wants to please and work with her rider, never against. Wow. Really, she’s amazing,” she spoke, in part to Georg too, who nodded graciously.
“Well, that’s good,” her husband chirped, “because she’s yours.”
Her mouth fell open, a hand rapidly clasped over it, eyes almost falling out into the soft sand beneath Mia’s hooves. “You did not.” Further stunned silence. “You did not buy her!”
He couldn’t have felt more entertained by her reaction if he’d tried. “I did. Told you you’d have to wait a while longer for your birthday present.”
“Stop it!”
He laughed, reaching to stroke Mia’s face, receiving a friendly shove from the horse. “Nope. I have to arrange everything, but tentatively we’re looking at her landing at JFK on July 18th, once we’re back from work.”
“Are you actually serious?”
She was so cute when she was dumbfounded. “I am. She’s all yours, baby love.”
Predictably, Jade burst into tears at hearing that, unable to believe her husband had planned all of this without her knowing. “Stop it!”
Everyone was in mild fits at her shock, Adrien reaching for her hand. “Go on, you go show off on your new horse a little longer, since you have to wait a while for her to come home.”
“I love you so much! I just... and I can’t... I wondered why she was being used in the school! She isn’t, is she?”
Not much got past Jade, Georg filling her in. “No, I had to tell a little lie. She has been backed at the stud and trained, but never used in the school. She was only brought up here for you, because your husband pulled a hell of a lot of strings so you would be able to say you had once ridden your own horse here.”
Her lip wobbled, looking to Adrien again, in utter disbelief that had Jess and Sunni in soft hysterics at her cuteness. “I love you so much!”
“Love you too, Moo. Go on, get outta here.” She was still wide eyed as she gathered the reins, drying her eyes as she rode off, Adrien chuckling as he leaned to Sunni. “Am I out of my damned mind for dropping fourteen and a half grand on a horse?”
“Insane, mate,” he confirmed, nodding in the direction Jade had ridden off in, “but look how bloody happy she looks, eh?”
“This is the most relaxed I’ve seen her look in months,” he replied, looking to his side to where Jess was dabbing her eyes with a tissue, thrilled for her friend.
“Why can’t you have a fucking brother, damnit? Mr freakin’ perfect over here!”
He threw his head back, laughing softly, wrapping an arm around her. “I’m far from it. I just pay attention when she tells me things, and I always remembered her telling me that it was her dream to ride here. Thought I’d buy her the horse while we were here, too.”
In truth, it hadn’t been him alone. He’d employed the services of Bob, flying him out to Austria a few weeks prior to he could take a look at Mia himself and ride her, make sure she was a suitable purchase for Jade before he spent that many thousands on the mare. Bob had confirmed she was perfect, telling him there was no way Jade wouldn’t love her.
After her ride, Jade took her back to the stable block, spending time making a huge fuss of her in her stable, stroking the grey dapples upon her coat. She also snapped plenty of pictures on her phone, hardly able to believe she actually owned a horse so beautiful and well mannered.
“How come she’s part grey, when all the others are white?” Adrien asked, Mia softly mouthing the palm of his hand as he stroked her muzzle.
“They’re born dark and become whiter the older they get. She’ll probably lose her grey entirely in about three years,” she confirmed, patting her thick neck. “I can’t wait to have you home, sweetheart. Just you wait and see how much grazing land you’ll have, yes! I’ll have to sort out paddocks for you, buy you a friend, too. And organise having stables built, yes I will, baby girl.”
“No, you don’t,” he spoke, winking. “Already arranged. They’re being built currently, and the paddocks have been marked out. Bob emailed me a list of everything I needed to get done, so there’s a three stable block going in with a feed store and tack room, a small washroom, and three paddocks so you can rotate them to rest the pasture, I think he said. I dunno. It all goes right over my head.”
Jade could barely believe what he’d gifted her, giving Mia a big hug around her neck and kissing her soft face a few times before she exited the stable, lavishing affection on her husband. “You’re entirely too good to me, Bug. What did I ever do to deserve all this?”
He looked thoughtful for a second. “Well, you do give real good blowjobs.” Her eye roll had him in soft fits, Adrien kissing her head before they walked back down the to meet the others at the entrance. “Making me happier than I’ve ever been before is what you did, baby love.”
By the time they arrived home, the contractors working on the small stable block had it all finished, its location off to the side of the garden, so the horses could be seen from the house. The paddocks were in the process of being sectioned off, all white railed fencing. Whistling for their dogs, she headed back down and into the kitchen, putting on a pot of very strong coffee, determined to fight the jetlag and get back on US time.
“Fucking hell, how much mail?” she cried, seeing Adrien upend a cardboard box full of it onto the island, one he’d driven back up the long drive to collect once he’d seen just how stuffed the front gate mailbox was.
“About three trees’ worth.” he snorted, taking a seat and beginning to sort through. Some were event invitation cards, some were for Jade, some circulars, but the rest were all handwritten envelopes, the same writing appearing upon each. He knew before he even opened the first one who they were from.
It had always been common knowledge that he resided at Stone Barn Castle, the address easily found on Google. He’d had a few fans write to him from time to time, but this was next level. This? It was harassment via mail. It made him feel uncomfortable, to have some small part of Serena right there in his kitchen, in the home that was a private sanctuary away from everything for him and his wife.
They sat and opened up every letter, eighty-three of them in total, sent from various places across Europe and some from within New York, too.
“Here, put them all back in here. I’ll call my lawyer in the morning, see if this as well as her following us for the last three months is enough to constitute harassment. I remember reading something once about stalking, there being some law decreeing that you could only obtain a restraining order if the stalker in question had damaged any of your property, or made direct threats of harm,” he sighed, combing his fingers through his hair as his shoulders sagged, his mouth tightening. “Fucking deranged bitch. I know she can’t help it, but still.”
“Well, we only have a few days and we’re out of here again, to a place we know she isn’t going to follow us.” Neither could wait for the break, Jade tired from tour, looking forward to two weeks in the sun with her husband and friends. The following day, they found out that the set of friends joining them had suffered a last-minute alteration, though, Katie calling her to say that she and Charlotte lamentably had to pull out last on account of the fact Charlotte’s father had been hospitalised following a massive heart attack.
It was shocking news, Jade knowing how dedicated to his fitness Mike was, asking to send her love to the family, her heart going out to Charlotte as well as her mum, Paula. Instead, the two last minute guests taking their place would be Jess and Jen. Adrien reacted exactly how he thought she would.
“I cannot get away from that woman’s loudness ever, can I? I might as well be married to her as well,” he complained in joke, pinching her arm playfully. “No, you know I love Jen to death.” And he did.
“Then if that’s the case, why do you still look pensive?” she asked, Adrien busying himself with his continued grooming of Atlas, who was the only dog out of the four who actually sat still for the procedure.
He took a breath, eyebrows drawing up. “Because while you were on the phone with Katie, I called my lawyer for some advice. I was right, there isn’t anything they can do unless Serena poses a risk to harm or has damaged property. Until then, she’s simply classed as a nuisance.”
“That’s so fucking messed up!” she cried, groaning low in her throat as her lips tightened. “For fucks sake, it shouldn’t even come to that!”
“Honey, I know. You’ve no need to yell at me,” he told her, Jade quick to soften.
“No, no I’m not yelling at you, baby. I’m just angry at the situation. I mean, we can at least put somewhat of a buffer between us. Our property is remote and secure as hell, we can employ bodyguards, but what about when this happens to people who don’t have our financial means to do this? Aside from that, can’t they see how stressful it is to deal with?” Pacing, she began to chew her thumb, her mind turning. “I think Jen might’ve been onto something, you know, when she suggested emailing her father.”
Finishing his grooming endeavours, he rewarded Atlas with a treat, stroking the floppy ears of the huge dog. “I think in lieu of not being able to do anything official, that’s actually a pretty good idea. Do you wanna do it? You’re better with words than I am.”
“I was going to call his offices, see if I can speak to him personally rather than email. How lucky I’ll be in getting hold him, I don’t know. These financiers are busy people.”
Indeed, he was, too. Jade called the offices of Reid and Vogel, asking to speak with Jonathan Reid personally, his secretary politely advising he was in meetings until the late afternoon and asking the nature of the call. She wanted to remain discreet for his sake, giving no further details than it being a family matter, leaving her name and number.
“Oh, my goodness!” the secretary exclaimed, “I loved you in The Conversation!”
Jade thanked her, the secretary going on to say that it might be the following morning when he managed to return her call, on account of how rammed his day was with appointments. It was while she was packing at just coming up to five that her phone began to ring, Jade moving a snoozing Groucho from where he lay on the bed, retrieving her iPhone from beneath the swathe of Red Setter fur concealing it.
“Mrs. Brody? Jonathan Reid, returning your call. I appreciate you being discreet when leaving your message, by the way, although I am more than aware of the reason you called.”
“Well, that clears up a long explanation. Please, call me Jade, too,” she insisted.
“Yes, and in turn you call me Jonathan. Listen, I completely sympathise with you, over what my daughter is doing. My wife and I, we’ve been trying for weeks to get her to return to the US, but she’s evading us. Serena, she has a history of this, these little obsessions that go a bit too far, but never has she taken this kind of harmful interest in someone before where she’s invested quite so much gusto in unrequited pursuit. Let me make that clear.
“We know that she needs help, though, and we are endeavouring to get it for her. Currently, we do not know where she is. I have had people check her apartment, I’ve gone there myself, too. She isn’t home, nor is she answering our calls. I am trying not to involve the police, you must understand as her father I want to protect her, Jade. I do very much see what she is doing to you and your husband is unacceptable, though. I think one thing that will help is putting a cap on her spending, limiting her access to the kind of cash it takes to be able to follow you,” he explained at length, Jade sitting down at the side of her suitcase, scratching Groucho’s ears as she listened.
She hadn’t actually thought for one second that her parents were trying to intervene, feeling a little guilty for assuming the worst about them after hearing his explanation. “I appreciate your efforts so far, Jonathan, I truly do.”
“I will stay in touch with you, please do keep notes of any other attempts of her interference in your life for me. I want a clear record of it for when we finally manage to locate her and send her back into treatment for this. We are going to have to be much tougher, have somebody watch over her once she has spent some time in a facility, make sure she is attending her therapy and taking her meds. I very much doubt either are happening for her to have slipped to this degree. I apologise profusely to you and your husband, I really do.”
Ending the call, she went downstairs and relayed it to Adrien, both feeling a little weight lifted from them thanks to Jonathan’s understanding and no-nonsense co-operation.
“Let’s just hope that by the time we’re home again, she’s been found. At least her family have actually been trying, which is better than her being in the wind with nobody attempting to get her behaviour under control.”
With that, they had little left in the way of worry, casting the whole debacle to the back of their mind, arriving in Turks and Caicos that coming Sunday morning, Jade freshly freaked out after the flight on the tiny plane to reach the islands. They were greeted at the private villa they’d booked for the two weeks by a member of staff, deciding to push the boat out and have housekeeping and a chef, Jade taking one of the cocktails held out towards her and glugging it back, calming her nerves.
“I don’t like the little plane!” she spoke in way of explanation for chugging half of it down. “God, that’s got a lot of rum in it.”
“Many people do not like it; it is not a pleasant flight no matter how short. I am Jackson, by the way. It is lovely to meet you. If you need anything, please, you have only to ask.”
Being the first ones there, but unfussy where it came to dwellings, they chose the room that had a bathtub in it since Jade enjoyed a long soak, their luggage brought up. Being the first to arrive also had other advantages, too, Jade shutting the door before dropping her dress and sauntering over to Adrien.
“Sit on the bed,” she instructed, watching his eyebrow arch.
“Oh, so it’s that kinda mood you’re in, hmm?”
Her fingers moved to the buttons of his shirt, undoing each, pushing it from him as she walked him backwards in the direction of the bed. “Yes, it is. And you’ll do as you’re told.”
Those words acted so potently that by the time she reached to squeeze his cock, it was rapidly beginning to harden, her teeth prickling in a bite upon his nipple only adding to it. Pushing him down to sit on the end of the bed, she climbed astride him, enjoying the feel of his mouth gliding all over her chest, leaving a trail of hungry kisses, his hands stroking up and down her back.
“Mmm, I love that so much, the feeling of your hands all over me,” she purred, her own gliding down the lean muscles of his upper arms. “I’d better enjoy it while I can, before I cuff you and then ride you so fucking well, you won’t be able to calm down.”
His brain went to static in an instant. A state he felt it’d likely remain, too.
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Streamer AU!
streaming now live!! with . . . tartaglia, kazuha, kokomi and itto
please do not rewrite, redistribute, or repost in any shape or form. thank you! check out the masterlist! masterlist and info/dni here
- feel free to come talk to me on asks! -
❱ now streaming… kazuha!
he does study streams!
he started just by showing his notes and his hands but after a while he finally showed a picture of his face (which was followed by an INSANE amount of people panicking)
now he does streams where he shows himself studying rather than just his hands (as a treat <3) but only on occasion.
stop im so in love with him 😭 i feel very strongly on the kazuha study aesthetic agenda
if it’s a full body stream he probably wears a big hoodie and you can see his organized set up. his room is full of plants and soft warm lighting, and he has an essential diffuser on his desk.
at the beginning of each stream the audience gets to decide what scent he puts in the diffuser for the day. somebody typically tips to get their favorite and he always smiles very fondly as he puts in the oil.
nobody ever complains in his streams or gets upset. it’s just safe. viewers might ask questions and somebody else will answer. or they talk about how pretty and calm kazuha is and hope he doesn’t notice since he’s busy working. (he does. but he thinks it’s funny)
he still doesn’t fully see the point of it all and finds it kind of amusing that so many watch but definitely is very peaceful and enjoys helping people relax. it’s why he keeps doing it.
sometimes people don’t even come to study they just come to see him and enjoy how calm the chat is.
okay the difference between the chaos of childe’s chat that goes at light speed of people freaking out and kazuhas gentle chat where everybody helps each other and talks about how soothing it all is is so funny
in terms of popularity he and kokomi are pretty close, she’s a bit ahead but they’re def friends who talk every time he’s in town.
i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m done but just 🥰🥰 he makes me all soft.
❱ now streaming… childe!
childe is 100% a popular streamer who plays COD and games of the sort i think we can all agree on that.
except sometimes he plays stardew valley. only stardew valley. nobody knows why but when asked he’s only ever responded with “i like fishing” which is true. he only ever spends time fishing in stardew. viewers either love it or hate it. (usually love it because it’s him)
i don’t know why i just feel like he gets frustrated and squeezes his controller really tightly and furrows his brows when he’s trying to focus and not die in game.
instead of hitting things since he’s not destructive he just throws his head back or rubs his face. sometimes he very dramatically takes off his headphones and takes a breath.
he’s always a good sport saying something along the lines of “i’ll get them next time.. i just missed it” and proceeds to figure out what he did wrong to fix for next time.
the absolute sweetest when people send him tips. he’ll always stop to say how appreciative he is and gives this big genuine smile the second he sees the notification. that’s probably the reason he gets tipped so often.
overall just a huge softie, going on his streams is addicting because he’s honestly just so fun to watch with how expressive he is and how amazing his laugh is.
simps. plenty of simps. but in a cute way sort of?? i don’t know how to explain it. everybody loves him so much.
there is this streamer from inazuma though called thoma… they get compared a lot. childe is secretly jealous. thoma is unfazed. might talk about his channel in a part two 🤔
❱ now streaming… kokomi!
i feel like her and kazuha would get along or collab at some point! people probably begged for it and she casually went “oh yeah! kazuha, i know him.” and people were so excited.
she has a pretty big audience honestly, she’s probably the most popular here overall and her community has remained calm and kind.
she has a lot of stationary and writes letters, sometimes she decorates those little photo cards. do you know what i’m talking about??? i think she makes custom ones for her viewers who tip nicely.
her audience is less a devoted same people every time type thing. she encourages this, and for people to come when they want to see her and not because they feel like they have to.
although she does have regulars who will drop by to say hello once in a while, and she never forgets a single person. talking to her on stream is very personal but also not invasive. nothing deep, just reassuring. if it’s been a bad day you can come to her streams and de stress and talk about happy things (happy things?? how do i phrase that??)
her upload schedule can be kind of sporadic, she’s busy and people are always happy to catch her. it’s kind of a i’ll see you when i see you type deal.
she plays animal crossing sometimes! her favorite villagers are merengue, lolly, and merri! she does not like raymond. no i won’t elaborate on that. she has a cluttered cottagecore theme for her island
she has a lot of sponsorships lined up (companies just reach out to her a lot. she’s very unproblematic) but it’s only for things she’d actually use and tells her fans her honest opinions. she does a bit of everything so most of the time it’s makeup or pens or something like that. she likes when she’s sent those little food subscription boxes.
she always has her nails done in pretty colors or acrylics, i don’t know why this is important in the slightest but i just feel like she does. it’s always some sort of creative nail art
she likes supporting small artists! like a lot!! if she buys stickers she’ll always link the shops and tell her viewers where any materials are from. she doesn’t gatekeep her little hobby at all.
people still like to buy from her regardless of if they know how to make them or not, she just is really good at it and makes super pretty layouts. you can tell when she’s the one who made it. plus she sends them in super pretty packaging with a note and extras!
❱ now streaming… itto! (the one and oni!)
itto streaming onikabuto fighting- just kidding betting on that is illegal and against the tos! he learned that last time…no more field trip streams
there is a stream clip out there of itto running from kujou sara after filming an illegal onikabuto match…. but let’s not talk about that!
he actually streams video games a lot like childe, but he’s extremely enthusiastic. extremely.
he calls his fans the arittaki gang. yes he does.
his audience is die hard for him. everybody acknowledges he’s a genius (sarcastic) and it’s like a “hey bro” dynamic. everybody is referred to as ‘bro’ or ‘man’ when itto addresses them. it’s just in his vocabulary.
somehow it gets very deep very fast. itto picks up on if a regular isn’t acting like they usually do and asks what’s wrong. it’s become a space of safety where the entire audience helps with the person.
“oh man i’m sorry you’re dealing with that- yknow i felt like that last week. it’s a hard place to be. yeah chat thinks so too! see? we’re all here. you’re always welcome on the stream we’ve all got your back! always!” the whole chat relating and sharing their personal stories.
if ANYBODY. i mean anybody. says something remotely negative everybody in the chat takes them down almost immediately. it’s so intimidating. like your best friends booing somebody off a stage. it’s great. ittos fairly sensitive to insults deep down anyway even if he brushes them off so it’s probably for the best it’s shut down fast.
not too much else to say here but ittos streams are just hilarious. he sometimes brings the stream places just to show his audience him having lunch or doing something exciting.
he is SHOCKED at his first time being sponsored but gets sponsored quite a few times.
his sponsors sponsor him very cautiously. very. cautiously. because he frequently nearly accidentally violates TOS but they do it because he’s so good at it man can sell anything. his viewers would buy anything to support him.
#genshin childe#childe x reader#childe x gender neutral reader#arataki itto#itto x reader#genshin x you#genshin x reader#itto imagines#itto#kokomi#kokomi x you#kokomi x reader#kazuha x you#kazuha#kazuha x reader#kazuha hcs#genshin hcs#itto hcs#genshin imagines#genshin impact
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hello, i was the anon for sending the leo request and that was so cute sobs 😭😭😭😭 and i have another request, but this time it's for izumi!! this can take place in their graduation ceremony where his s/o (gn of course) broke down crying, touched because the knights and them have been through a lot.
hope this make sense 🫶🫶
a moment of eternity [izumi sena]
notes hi again anon!! i'm glad that you liked it :D i.. have not finished requiem fully yet .. so i hope that this isn't too canon-divergent or short ^_^
description repayment fes has concluded, and you feel yourself overwhelmed with all kinds of emotions.
additional info ! era, gn reader, takes place during repayment fes, title is taken from this song, i once again had no idea how to end this >w>
graduation season... you've attended a few graduation ceremonies over the years, but none of them have felt quite as emotional for you as this year's repayment fes did.
knights in particular seemed to be struggling in the weeks leading up to the repayment fes. as someone who was close to all of the members, you did your best to help with what you could, but even then, you weren't exactly the most aware person out there of most of the issues related to passing down roles and graduation.
either way, requiem was.. successful. in the end, arashi was deemed the first-placer of the duel, but it was tsukasa that was ultimately the one chosen to succeed leo as the king of knights.
...now that you thought about it, so many things seemed to be changing from next year onwards, both inside and outside of knights. izumi and leo were going to work on their respective careers overseas, tsukasa was going to be the new king of knights, ritsu and arashi would be 3rd years already, not to mention how knights would most likely get new members... thinking back, you couldn't help but feel sentimental. you weren't a member of knights, no, but you've been beside them for so long that it felt like you've experienced a good amount of the highs and lows that the unit has gone through.
you felt the tears threatening to spill, but you swore to yourself that you wouldn't cry. no, not yet. graduation is a day to make memories, to cherish the company of your classmates that you most likely won't see for a while.
izumi seemed to notice the fact that you were holding your tears back. "hey, what's wrong? if you're gonna cry, do it now."
he was right, you knew that it would be pointless to hold your emotions back now. it would probably be one of the last times that you'd see everyone in knights together for a while, and you'd miss them, but also—
then came the tears. you tried to wipe them from your eyes, but to no avail. they seemed to never stop.
"ahh... things sure have changed, huh?" you sniffled. "everyone in knights..."
you paused, trying to wipe your tears. "they've all changed so much... this year has been—"
it was no use. the tears felt like they would never end. the emotions overwhelmed you like a tidal wave as you cried even more.
a few moments passed by before you felt a hand on your shoulder.
looking up through your tear-blurred vision, you met eyes with izumi. "...you're right. things have changed a lot this year, haven't they?"
silence fell over the two of you. through the windows, you could see the sunlight shining through, tinting the room in orange and pink.
you didn't want to ruin such a moment, but you felt a question weighing on your mind, one that you needed to get out into the open.
"hey, izumi." your tears had slowed down by now, reduced to sniffles. "do you think that knights will truly be alright now?"
"haah? of course we will. what kind of question is that?"
you paused. of course they would. knights clawed their way to the top after that scandal during spring. even after all that they've been through, from last year to this very moment, you knew that they'd be alright. they had to be alright.
"...just wondering," you shrugged, wiping the tears from your eyes.
"well, in any case..." izumi trailed off, trying to choose his words wisely. "i'm glad that i met you."
that certainly caught you off-guard. graduation was indeed a sentimental time, but to hear izumi sena of all people giving you a genuine confession of gratitude?
"huh..? really?" you asked.
"yeah. why wouldn't i be?" he questioned. "you've been by my side for years now, so it's only natural for me to thank you."
"ahh, i'm so grateful to have met you too, izumi!" you exclaimed, feeling the hot tears spill down your face. "i just... i love you so much!"
"h-hey, don't start crying again!" izumi responded. "we still have to meet up with the others!"
"...i can't help it! you all mean so much to me!" you sobbed into his uniform blazer.
...izumi couldn't deny it — he shared the sentiment. from the larger veteran unit of chess/othello/backgammon to knights... knights, both as a unit and as individuals, have been through a lot over the course of its history. of course he'd feel something towards his current unit mates.
"...hey, (name). look at me."
...perhaps, just this once... just for this singular moment, izumi will be up-front with his feelings, just for you.
#🍬 — grace writes#🍬 — grace rqs#izumi sena x reader#sena izumi x reader#enstars x reader#ensemble stars x reader#the ending was kind of rushed oops T__T
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I'm very curious to know whether the present Batfamily noticed that Jason has gone missing? I just fonished your time travelling fic the Time Before and I have so many questions! Is that something you'd even want to focus on? Mayby little Jay should stay in the past? Third time is the charm right???? But worried Bruce is soo juicy! Maybe the past and present Bruce can have an adoption war? I cant decide how I'd like this story to go haha
Ahhhhh I really need to finish that story. I actually know the answer to everything, since I had the whole thingy planned out before I started (or at least I knew the end game and had the final scene already drafted out)
I am going to happily answer everything, but I"ll put it under a break because its SPOILERS FOR THE TIME BEFORE!!!!! for chapters that will come out I have no idea how long from now. I hope soon, but I don't see any real time on my schedule for at least the next month. 😭
Seriously, this is major Spoilers don't look if you hate spoilers.
So Jason staying in the past would be super interesting just in him getting to have a second go at it and this time not die, etc, but I feel like I'd have to have him slowly lose his memory, idk. I just feel it would be weird and difficult for a self-sufficient adult (even if hes only 19 and is a certified Baby because of that, he does support himself and is completely on his own) to have to redo childhood, and be so dependent. At least he’s 9 and not like 2, but yeah. That would be hard. But the angst potential there 🥺 BUT alas, that is not the plan.
Jason is going to end up back in his 19-year-old body. The time travel body switcher device only throws a consciousness back in time for a set amount of time, and they'll know here soon the exact amount of time it is. Hal or whoever it was Bruce asked for advice is gonna be like 'oh yeah i just dealt with that stupid thing a couple months ago' and tell them it's harmless and Jason's consciousness (and Black Mask's) will go back to their original time and bodies in like 3 days or something. Or maybe I'll pick some really random number, like 62.43 hours, because "well it was programmed on [some random planet] and is going off how they measure time!"
I MENTIONED SPOILERS RIGHT, because I'm legit just gonna tell yall everything here.
So there will be a bit of angst because Hal will say something like 'well as long as their future selves are still alive they'll pop back no problem. The catch is, the future self is basically uninhabited (meaning very vulnerable). There's not baby jason suddenly up in the future. Since Jason got shot at the start of the fic, it makes Jason just think he's either gonna pop back to nothing and be dead or just never return, and he's quite upset about it but trying to hide it. He doesn't let himself go back to sleep again the whole time he's in the past.
BUT, back up in the future, a certain Batman gets a weird reading on his computer coming from Black Mask's place, and goes to investigate and finds Red Hood bleeding out and an unconscious Black Mask. He quickly takes Red Hood to the cave for treatment and gets GCPD to pick up Black Mask. He probably did something wrong. They'll find something to charge him with, even if its just shooting Red hood.
So Bruce and Alfred have Jason's body and they take good care of it and get him on the mend, but hes nOT WAKING UP!!! It's very concerning. Bruce is haggard. Idk if he finds the device black mask had or not, and if he does, he gets the same info from Hal past bruce got, too. So maybe he knows Jason is coming back, maybe he doesn't. But he keeps vigil at Jason's bedside, because despite what Jason thinks, Bruce loves him dearly. Unless im specifically writing an abusive!bruce AU, my Bruce always loves Jason dearly. It's just Jason who might not believe or understand that.
Anyway. Theres lots of tears in the past the closer to Jason's return gets, won't go into detail, but then he pops back up into the future. It just felt like he fell asleep, so he wakes up kinda groggy and feels the pain in his stomach and is like oh. so im just gonna die now. but NOPE. HE ISN'T Because Bruce is sitting right there at his bedside and they have a heart to heart 🥺 Jason is kinda forced into the conversation because obviously being a teenager he wants to jump right back to his angry i-hate-you-dad attitude but Past Bruce is still so fresh in his mind and all the good warm feelings he had he breaks pretty fast.
Then I'll bounce back to the past for like an epilogue or something and show little Jason waking back up in himself and he's being carried to bed by Bruce or something and FREAKS OUT. Absolutely goes mental. But future Jason had already told Bruce how to win Jason over by getting him books and food and talking about going to Gotham Academy so he gets won over very fast. (I think they're just gonna act like he got there and he had amnesia but social services dropped him off and does he not remember that? but he remembers everything else now??? and go from there. BbJason will see his bear and his picture and everything in his bedroom and kind of relax and think maybe they're truthful. He can at least give this home a try. They haven't hit him yet.)
And thats basically it. Everyone lives happily ever after. Baby Jason grows up to not die at 15, and big Jason moves back in with Bruce and, like, goes to college or something. Thank you Black Mask for trying to kill him, he saved everyone.
#spoilers#have i metioned here that im on a school board now#and somehow the answer to 'whats the workload for this position' was 'oh meetings once a month'#has turned into meetings every single week and sometimes twice a week and also all the school events#so like#ty guy who asked me if i could be nominated you LIED TO ME#lmao#its ok#i enjoy it#im also taking over a director of one of our childrens programs#im busy#😭#oh yeah and telework ended at work thanks to SOMEONE at work claiming all his problems were caused by ME TELEWORKING#like fuck you dude they were not#but here we are#so suddenly i have no free time#😭😭#i hope to write at least a little this weekend#but i doubt it iwll be for the time before
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Hey feel free to ignore but uh. You seem like a guy who has sex? And I was wondering if you had any good resources abt safe sex etc esp from a trans friendly angle? I recently started dating my bf and it's both of our first relationships ever (in our mid 20s lol) so we want to eventually Do It but we're taking our time and trying to be safe about it and I kinda feel like I don't even fully know what I don't know??? They also seem to have more just baseline knowledge abt this stuff than me and I don't want to seem like I'm not taking things seriously or something :/
(Also if I can complain for like 5 seconds it's super frustrating how all the info online seems to be that condoms should be everywhere and super easy to find but I literally haven't seen any since my high school library was giving them out half a decade ago!!!! Like I've been trying gas stations corner stores etc and I just don't see them idk if I'm just missing them or looking in the wrong place or what 😡😭 /rant over)
hey, congrats! it's really cool that you and your bf are getting to figure this stuff out together! i don't think you happening to know less to start off with would make you look frivolous, not your fault it's hard to find good honest useful sex ed info right now, and you seem like you're being totally thoughtful about this! going slow and doing research is good, imo it's a good idea to be upfront with your bf about feeling like they know more than you--it can be really weird to feel less aware than ur partner about like Anything, and talking it out so you know what their expectations towards you are can help a lot, plus sometimes you find out they've been feeling the same way. I am always saying to talk about it to em though.
I know a decent chunk about safe sex but it's been gathered up piecemeal rather than from like, specific, recommendable resources, so I can give pointers in theory (guess you can ask me specific questions if you have any? if I can't answer I can always look em up) but it's harder to point you along to a proper source of info. i must have read Primed at some point, and it goes around posts on here a lot, but I don't really remember firsthand how useful or comprehensive it was, beyond being a resource booklet aimed at male couples involving at least one trans guy. I'm sure there are a lot of other guides at this point, too! but I'm not really sure how to find em, off the top of my head. I feel like I learned a surprising amount about partnered sex and safe sex practices from reading sex toy review blogs (thoughtful longform stuff in the vein of heyepiphora).
this is kinda silly but it helped me back in the day; wikipedia has a lot of articles on sex acts (and different kinds of contraceptives and barriers, source links here can get you to VERY useful info on em!!!) and I feel like they may help you wrap your head around stuff you may not have much context on. like even just the 'sex positions' article is like, a decent starter place--it uses heteronormative language intermittently and VERY cisnormative language throughout + has a fair amount of chaff, but it's also a remarkably comprehensive list of all kinds of configurations for penetrative and non-penetrative sex, & even describes how simpler acts like frottage and mutual masturbation can work (which often gets skipped over 😭). it's kinda crap if you have to juggle like, physical disabilities or the ways that fatness can change how two people's bodies interact, and includes a lot of obscure, back-hurty-lookin penetrative sex positions that get disproportionate use in porn, but it can definitely be a good jumping off point for poking around online for more info, or introduce you to new concepts/bolster your faith in your interest in something you were thinking about but weren't sure was A Thing People Actually Do In Bed.
also akxlaldf listen about half the condoms I've used in my Life came from a huge amount of free ones I accumulated in one summer like nine years ago (volunteered at an LGBT center and would take one or two home from the free bin every day, plus got a big bag of freebies at a transmarch) like ??? I do see em in stores in my area, but they can be so weirdly annoying to find when you're actually looking for em. if you can online order, most sex toy sites (like shebop or goodvibes or whatever the fuck) will also sell condoms in singles and multipacks (& usually a lot more kinds than you'd find in a store, which can make it nice if you're specifically needing to find unlubricated, flavored, bigger ones, latex free, etc).
but yeah feel free to message if you have specific questions, I wish I could provide better info off the bat 😆 also some extremely miscellaneous stuff that's like, entry level but still worth repeating: it's helpful and common to like, pop a pillow under your hips to improve your angle (wedge pillows are your friend if you happen to have one around) or grab a footstool to even out heights if you're doing something standing up, stuff like that. you can nab a cushion or kneepads if anyone's gonna be kneeling on a hard surface too. a longer strap-on can be helpful when figuring out positioning, so you don't need to get your pelvises as close together to make it work. talk stuff over ahead of time if you can, both to get more familiar with what you and your partners' wants are and to help sketch out some approximate boundaries ahead of time. sex toys are a great convenience, but get 'body safe' materials if you can; silicone, metal, glass, and most hard plastic toys can all be sterilized; PVC rubber, 'jelly' toys and ones made out of what's often called cyberskin or sexflesh or stuff like that (TPE, thermoplastic elastomer) can't, and some may let off harmful chemicals like phthalates (or just plain disconcerting oils and aromas) as the plastic breaks down. (if you're goin for it anyway? PVC holds up ok but is a bit stiff, TPE feels luxurious but rips SOOO easy, and I've never bothered with jelly.)
there's never any shame in finding certain sex acts, or just certain elements of intimacy, overwhelming or stressful! your like process of developing a sexual awareness and skill set doesn't have to follow any set pattern, and you and your bf are always allowed to make concessions to be sure your n their own boundaries and needs are met (I get overwhelmed easily on a sensory level, and I had a long term relationship where I wore gloves almost every time I fingered my partner bc the mix of textures was a lot for me at the time, regardless of how we swapped fluids regularly).
you probably heard this one before a whole bunch, but i legally can't let u go without saying that peeing after sex as soon as you're ready to get up is a VERY good idea, regardless of your anatomy--it flushes out your urethra, which helps reduce your risk of getting a urinary tract infection (which isn't rly about if the sex was protected or not--it's just easy for bacteria from other places on your own body to be introduced to your urethra during sex, regardless of ur partner's saliva/fluids.) no shame if it doesn't work, I got a uti from jackin it once, stuff happens! which brings me to my conclusion, which is that u gotta always keep in mind how weird and awkward and funny sex is and that it's normal and good for it to be all those things. excited for u! wishing u well.
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