#The Agents Of H.A.R.M

[theindescribable1]

🎲 Ambrose 🎲

Tried playing around with perspective a little bit. The hand could be a little higher. Head could be better. Meh.

[inde-extras]

I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M I'm so excited to make H.A.R.M

I AM SO EXCITED TO MAKE THE H.A.R.M STORY!

[countesspetofi]

mst3k - extreme!

To this day, I can't cook or eat rice without saying to myself, "EXTREEME RICE!!"

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

You think this is all there is to America? Apple pie and all that jazz? Well it's my job to keep the pie on the table and no-one questions how I do it!

Daffy Duck to Speedy Gonzales 

[gojira007]

Yeah, the show's own creators/writers being at best apathetic to the Sci-Fi channel's executive mandate to have Season 8 feature a running storyline of sorts is one of those great ironies to me, because on the one hand I do get it; it really is fairly far afield of what the show's actually about, and I rather doubt it played to the strengths or inclinations of anyone working on the show? But on the other hand it's kind of the reason I became a fan of the show in the first place; my first episode was "Giant Spider Invasion", which features an "Invasion of the Bodysnatchers" parody story-line, and while I very much loved the actual movie-watching segments, it was those host segments with the storyline specifically that made me really want to come back for more. Something about the specific combination of these characters, this setting, with an actual Story just sort of resonated with me, and I rather suspect it's precisely because it felt so out of place from what you might otherwise expect.

We of the Intergalactic Tribunal, bound by neither space nor time, find your atrocities typical of humankind.

[jimintomystery]

MST3K's most wanted

I've been organizing my Mystery Science Theater 3000 collection, so I've become preoccupied with the handful of episodes that are not easily available, and the reasons why. In case in anyone else is interested, I thought I'd share what I've learned.

For our purposes we'll be focusing on the ten seasons that aired on cable, from 1989 to 1999. With the post-2017 episodes, it's trivial to purchase them on home video or streaming. And the pre-cable stuff, from KTMA, is widely available as bootleg footage, which is probably about as good as you're ever going to get. But the episodes from the cable era have been notoriously difficult to re-release, and require special attention.

Of the 176 MST3K episodes that aired on cable, 166 have been released on home video, and 145 are available for streaming/download on the Gizmoplex. As someone who's been trying to collect the whole series since the 1990s, I think that's pretty impressive. But there are 40 episodes that have been particularly tricky. Let's take a look, won't you?

Currently available on the Gizmoplex, but never on home video (1):

913 - Quest of the Delta Knights

As I understand it, nobody was sure who owned the rights to this movie, or how to contact them, for years. The situation has only recently been cleared up, perhaps too late for a DVD release.

Currently available on the Gizmoplex, but out of print on home video (8):

203 - Jungle Goddess

317 - Viking Women and the Sea Serpent

319 - War of the Colossal Beast

510 - The Painted Hills

619 - Red Zone Cuba

806 - The Undead

808 - The She-Creature

912 - The Screaming Skull

It looks like all of these went out of print due to being on a set where a different episode's rights expired. Theoretically Shout Factory could re-release any of them in a "Lost and Found" set, but that may not be cost-effective as people move away from collecting physical media.

Currently available on home video and MST3K's official YouTube, but not on the Gizmoplex (1):

615 - Kitten with a Whip (Vol. 25 DVD, 2012)

Kitten is one of the Universal movies that could only be licensed for physical media. And yet, it's the only one I can find on the official YouTube channel. Beats me why that is.

Currently available on home video, but not on the Gizmoplex (16):

401 - Space Travelers (Vol. 32 DVD, 2015)

522 - Teen-Age Crime Wave (Vol. 33 DVD, 2015)

524 - 12 to the Moon (Vol. 35 DVD, 2016)

601 - Girls Town (Vol. 39 DVD, 2017)

605 - Colossus and the Headhunters (Vol. 38 DVD, 2017)

614 - San Francisco International (Vol. 32 DVD, 2015)

704 - The Incredible Melting Man (Vol. 36 DVD, 2016)

801 - Revenge of the Creature (Vol. 25 DVD, 2012)

802 - The Leech Woman (25th Anniversary Edition DVD, 2013)

803 - The Mole People (Vol. 26 DVD, 2013)

804 - The Deadly Mantis (Vol. 27 DVD, 2013)

805 - The Thing That Couldn't Die (Vol. 29 DVD, 2013)

814 - Riding With Death (Vol. 36 DVD, 2016)

815 - Agent for H.A.R.M (Vol. 33 DVD, 2015)

901 - The Projected Man (Vol. 30 DVD, 2014)

1013 - Diabolik (Vol. 39 DVD, 2017)

I was able to find the DVD sets listed above on Shout Factory's website. As far as I know, they'll remain in print for the foreseeable future, but there's no way to know how long that will last.

The general pattern with these episodes is that the movies are owned by major studios that would only license them for physical media. Columbia owns Teen-Age Crime Wave and 12 to the Moon. MGM owns Girls Town and The Incredible Melting Man. Paramount owns Diabolik. But the big player here is Universal, which controls the rights to Space Travelers, San Francisco International, Revenge of the Creature, Leech Woman, Mole People, Deadly Mantis, Thing That Couldn't Die, Riding With Death, Agent for H.A.R.M., and Projected Man.

The odd man out here is Colossus and the Headhunters; I can't find any info on who owns the rights to this film, which may be part of the problem.

The real hard cases, the stickiest of wickets, are below...

Released on home video, but now out of print (5):

212 - Godzilla vs. Megalon (Vol. 10 DVD, 2006)

309 - The Amazing Colossal Man (VHS, 1996)

910 - The Final Sacrifice (Vol. 17 DVD, 2010)

1001 - Soultaker (Vol. 14 DVD, 2009)

1012 - Squirm (Turkey Day Collection DVD, 2014)

Megalon and Colossal Man were both recalled when rights issues came up after they were released. Oops. These were produced by Rhino, back before Shout Factory took over.

The Final Sacrifice is particularly tough to find, even unofficially, because director Tjardus Greidanus is very aggressive about tracking down download links. I always figured someone was similarly possessive of Soultaker, since it's clearly a passion project, but that's purely my speculation.

The Turkey Day DVD set is still available on Amazon at a reasonable price, so Squirm is still relatively accessible for now.

Never released on home video or streaming (9):

201 - Rocketship X-M

213 - Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster

311 - It Conquered the World

416 - Fire Maidens of Outer Space

418 - Attack of the the Eye Creatures

807 - Terror from the Year 5000

809 - I was a Teenage Werewolf

905 - The Deadly Bees

906 - The Space Children

In 2017, Shout released its final (?) MST3K DVD collection, which included Satellite Dishes, a compilation of host segments from episodes that "may never get a legitimate release." This included the nine listed above, as well as The Amazing Colossal Man and Quest for the Delta Knights. Of course, Delta Knights eventually got a digital-only release, which is cause for a glimmer of hope. But the others are probably tougher nuts to crack.

Wade Williams owned the rights to Rocketship X-M and had a particular sentimental attachment to the film. His death in 2023 may make it easier to negotiate with his estate, but I wouldn't count on that being a swift process.

Godzilla vs. Megalon and Godzilla vs. The Sea Monster are part of a prestigious franchise, and it's remarkable MST3K got away with riffing on Godzilla movies in the first place. I get the impression that Japanese culture doesn't particularly appreciate the sort of mockery MST3K is known for, so the rights to these two movies may be a long, long shot. Then again I used to think there was no hope of for the Gamera episodes too.

Fire Maidens, Deadly Bees, and Space Children are owned by Olive Films, and currently licensed to Paramount. It's possible a deal can be made later on, but not until the current arrangement expires.

The major bugbear for MST3K fandom is Susan Hart, the widow of American International Pictures co-founder James Nicholson. One way or another the AIP catalog was split up and Hart laid claim to several of their films, including Amazing Colossal Man, It Conquered the World, Eye Creatures, Terror from the Year 5000, and Teenage Werewolf. Hart's price for licensing her movies is very high, and it seems Shout has given up negotiating with her. I suppose the situation could change when she passes away, but I'd feel rather silly hoping for an old woman to die just so I can pay 8 bucks to watch robots laugh at a werewolf movie.

In conclusion, I've already purchased all the movies available on the Gizmoplex (I got most of them in a Kickstarter reward package), and the 31 that aren't available there can be obtained by, ahem, other means. So it's a great time to be an MST3K fan, and I'm still amazed how easy it is to watch the show nowadays.

[the-laridian]

Thank you for tagging me @swoljarjar

Favorite Color: Royal blue, emerald green, golden yellow, crimson & scarlet

Currently reading: more like currently writing amirite? srsly

Last song: Hold My Hand, Hold My Heart by the Chantrellines

Last movie: last month, Lord of the Rings trilogy

Last series: I drew a blank on this until I remembered I had MST3K "Agent for H.A.R.M." on in the background while I did some needlework earlier this week

Current Craving: I'm good right now, thanks

Tea or coffee: coffee in the morning, decaf iced tea in the afternoon

Currently working on: I got the lemon curd made, the meringues are in the oven, the lemon cake will be up next, I just finished 2 more Christmas ornaments for 2024 and I'm on track to make the last 3 (of 12) today, which'll be nice, then play some Fallout 76 and also I'm writing in between all of these things

No pressure tags: @bokatan @bleumanouche @the-lastcall @galaxycunt @gayafsatan @darkfire1177@happyhappysparkle @throwbackjoe @fuzzyizmit

[zippocreed501]

FROM THE B-MOVIE BADLANDS...

...images from the lost continent of cult films, b-movies and celluloid dreamscapes

Super Spy Movies Of The Sixties

Yes I understand Q. It's a combined radio transmitter, harpoon gun and smoke grenade, but why do I have to hide it up there?

Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine (1965) The Silencers (1966) Our Man Flint (1966) Modesty Blaise (1966) Agent for H.A.R.M. (1966) Secret Agent Super Dragon (1966) Operation Kid Brother (1967) Deadlier Than the Male (1967) Salt and Pepper (1968)

[theindescribable1]

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY BOYYY

Shshsghshshsjsgshahdgjahdha thank youuu I love himmm! This is going to be saved forever in my fanart album, thank you and goodbye 💕

I have drawn one of @theindescribable1’s OCs hehehehee >:]

[theindescribable1]

You need to draw Zuix and Ambrose in a get-along sweater.

I think they're mad. Deserved.

[le-fils-de-lhomme]

Seeing Crow with legs is the most horrifying ever.

[theindescribable1]

Hmmm I wonder why you like drawing Zuix 🤔🤔🤔

Anyways, THANKSSSS YIPPEEE ZUIX :D

Im obsessed with drawing other peoples ocs

@sunnyboi3 lovely sun!! Augh, I've been wanting to draw them for awhile!!! I'll probaly draw them digitally soon, but yknow

@theindescribable1 and of course, zuix. Hehe

[mst3kgifs]

Stop, or I'll Agent From H.A.R.M. you!

[jaspers47]

I Watched 160 Movies in 2021

Five Stars

The Atomic Cafe (1982) Ball of Fire (1941) Belfast (2021) Bo Burnham: Inside (2021) Capricorn One (1978) The Celluloid Closet (1995) David Byrne’s American Utopia (2020) Footlight Parade (1933) Fourteen Hours (1951) Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai (1999) The Green Knight (2021) Hamilton (2020) Licorice Pizza (2021) Manhunter (1986) Metropolitan (1990) The Mitchells vs. the Machines (2021) Monterey Pop (1968) Nomadland (2020) Pig (2021) Shaun the Sheep Movie (2015) Shiva Baby (2021) The Sugarland Express (1974) Titane (2021) West Side Story (2021) Woodstock (1970)

Four Stars

The Amityville Horror (1979) Another Round (2020) Arachnophobia (1990) The Bad and the Beautiful (1952) Bad Education (2019) Barbarella (1968) Bone Tomahawk (2015) Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969) Color Adjustment (1992) Don’t Look Back (1967) Emma (2020) Flight of the Navigator (1986) The Fog (1980) The French Dispatch (2021) The Freshman (1925) From Russia with Love (1963) Get Shorty (1995) Gold Diggers of 1933 (1933) Hail Satan? (2019) Hard Eight (1996) Howard (2018) In the Heights (2021) Lady Snowblood (1973) Laputa: Castle in the Sky (1986) Last Night in Soho (2021) Love and a .45 (1994) Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom (2020) The Man Who Came to Dinner (1942) Marwencol (2010) Mother (2009) My Little Chickadee (1940) The Naughty Nineties (1945) Nightmare Alley (1947) The Raven (1935) Rocky II (1979) Seven Chances (1925) The Silent Partner (1978) Sound of Metal (2019) The Sparks Brothers (2021) Stoker (2013) Strait-Jacket (1964) Street Gang: How We Got to Sesame Street (2021) Summer of Soul (Or, When the Revolution Could Not Be Televised) (2021) The Sweatbox (2002) Tampopo (1985) To Die For (1995) The Towering Inferno (1974) Waking Ned Devine (1998)

Three and a Half Stars

The Black Cat (1934) Carmine Street Guitars (2019) The In-Laws (1979) Just Another Girl on the I.R.T. (1992) Kid 90 (2021) Nightmare Alley (2021) A Nightmare on Elm Street II: Freddy’s Revenge (1985) No Time to Die (2021) Save Yourselves! (2020) Sign o’ the Times (1987) Soul (2020) Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021) Summer of ‘42 (1971) The Trial of the Chicago 7 (2020)

Three Stars

The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T (1953) The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes (1939) The African Queen (1951) Annette (2021) Assault on Precinct 13 (1976) Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar (2021) Bill & Ted Face the Music (2020) The Black Cauldron (1985) Black Widow (2021) Camelot (1967) Class Action Park (2020) Cluny Brown (1946) Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (2002) Dick Johnson is Dead (2020) The Egg and I (1947) Escape to Witch Mountain (1975) Female Trouble (1974) The Gilded Lily (1935) L'avventura (1960) The Last Blockbuster (2020) Layer Cake (2004) The Living Desert (1953) Luca (2021) Mank (2020) The Orange Years: The Nickelodeon Story (2020) Original Cast Album: Company (1970) The Plague Dogs (1982) The Power of the Dog (2021) Promising Young Woman (2020) Shirley (2020) Shoot the Piano Player (1960) Showbiz Kids (2020) Star 80 (1983) The Suicide Squad (2021) Theodora Goes Wild (1936) Three on a Match (1932) Val (2021)

Two and a Half Stars

The Donut King (2020) Frank and Ollie (1995) Game of Death (1978) The Man with One Red Shoe (1985) Seven Stages to Achieve Eternal Bliss (2020) When a Stranger Calls (1979)

Two Stars

All of Me (1984) Blood and Black Lace (1964) Brother Bear (2003) Darby O'Gill and the Little People (1959) Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead (1991) The Fox and the Hound (1981) Free Guy (2021) I Love You Phillip Morris (2009) Plan B (2021) The Ramen Girl (2008) The Rescuers (1977) The Strongest Man in the World (1975) Super Troopers (2001) Time After Time (1979) The Visitors (1993)

One Star

Agent for H.A.R.M. (1966) Cars (2006) Catalina Caper (1967) Chicken Little (2005) Count Dracula’s Great Love (1972) Dinosaur (2000) The Dead Talk Back (1957) Home on the Range (2004) Escape 2000 (1983) The Lion King 1½ (2004) Malignant (2021) (look, I didn’t like it, okay?) The New Mutants (2020) Rollergator (1996) Treasure Planet (2002) The Undead (1957)

[monkeypretzel]

Crow T. Robot: “You know, women can multi-task while they’re making love.”

Mike Nelson (mumbling disgruntledly): “I know that.”

Crow turns and stares at Mike.

[retrorevelations]

Time to take a look at another classic 80s arcade game that I was somewhat fixated with as a child, Namco's Rolling Thunder!