#Tgirl swag

[lizardho]

After I came out I was supported by family but still kinda lonely. I had no queer friends, and I wanted some SO badly.

So I took to campus clubs - and I got nothing. They were all difficult to contact, small, and poorly organized. So I did the next thing a millennial does and looked up an app. And lo and behold, I find an app called Grindr.

I know this sounds cartoonish, but somehow I’d never really heard of Grindr’s reputation. And I was so excited to have found an LGBT Networking App and so I made a profile. I had one picture on it, no other details, and nothing about me. I also had cousins from far far away coming over that day. Leaving my profile empty, I threw my phone on the bed and spend time with my cousins. 4 hours pass and I return to my phone to see 13 dick pics. That was wild by itself, but the weirdest part was that the first image I opened was a dick pic with TWO curves in it. Literally. It was shaped like the letter ‘s.’ I was hypnotized, but not in a good way. It was like an optical illusion, a skin-colored overly-veiny unwashed repulsive optical illusion.

I am never EVER gonna say I am pro-unsolicited dick pics. That is fucked up shit and it’s so aggravating and unnecessary. What I will say, though, is that if I were that guy I’d open with that pic too. Because at that point you’re looking for the one woman on earth with an s-shaped vagina. That was probably why he was hitting on trans women to begin with - he knows we get our shit custom, at least one of us has to have a loop-de-loop in there.

I spent like 12 months on that app, averaging about 5-6 dick pics a day, and none of them ever got to me like that one 😂😭🥲

@inbabylontheywept @sophiecintailed

new tag game!

confess something silly and tag some moots! I’ll go first:

I still use little kid toothpaste because I hate the flavor of mint

@musical-dash-trash @forestgromlin @pipsqueakpanic @theoneandonlypatches @strange-scottish-guy @rins-batcave @emilem-forevermore +my other moots!!

[punkeropercyjackson]

I know the interpretation 'unanimously agreed by the fandom' or whatever in Pjo circles regarding Percy Jackson's canon punkness and headcanoning Percy as queer is Percy as a stereotypical bi grunge skater boy but as an actual irl punk person(anarchist + activist + diy master in training + black autistic transfag + radicalizer and intergenerational friend of multiple baby punks),Percy's personality and lore has a lot more grounding in and potential for punk transfeminism as her type of queerness.Nonstop fighting men in power and against masculinity and manhood tried to be forced towards you and doing it all as the mom friend of your squad who's obsessed with blue things because your mom passed it down to you to help both of you cope with the abuse of a man and has a thing for sea based things too,burgers,horses,baggy clothes for comfort but to hide your figure since you're insecure over your apperance even though you look like a goddess and kiddy hobbies/interests as a mix of undiagnosed audhd mistaken for just adhd and coping with your lost childhood and doing eco-activism with your art hoe lesbian best friend in high school all sounds pretty punk tgirl to me.Y'all talking about Thalia Grace to erase her misandry and pretend she wouldn't hate him but Percy Jackson is the REAL Girl Hobie Brown

[lizardho]

When I came out, I was SO scared I was gonna get disowned. I wrote a letter to my parents, sent it to their emails, put a physical copy on the counter, and left the house for a few hours to give them time. In that time I tried coffee for the first time, which was a dreadful idea, and got all jittery. I kept waiting for a text or something but nothing happened.

After a few hours, I didn’t hear back from them so I went home. My parents were home and had stacked a bunch of groceries on top of the letter without opening it. They said “hi” and I said “hi” and went down stairs to the basement. I held my dog and panicked about what to do. My sister, who knew that I had written them a letter of great importance, told me they hadn’t read it yet. She also told me she could ask them to do so. I consented to this and stayed in the basement. A few minutes later my dad knocked on the door and poked his soft smooth little nerd head in and said “hey buddy” and I started crying so hard I almost vomited. He came over and gave me a BIG hug and said that it was gonna be OK, he was OK with this, he knew it must have been hard but he was here for me. He told me he and my mom had already talked years before they had me about how if they had to pick between their faith and their child they’d pick their child. It was a very sweet moment. I came out to my mom later that evening and we were both bawling the whole time.

The day after I came out to my parents, I came out to my brother @inbabylontheywept at a Mexican restaurant and he took it like a champ. That evening my mom took me for a walk and looked almost angry - she said she wanted to make sure that I didn’t use being a woman as an excuse to not go to grad school. I told her I wouldn’t and she instantly looked relieved and happier.

My dad, on the other hand, seemed to struggle with it. He kept asking me if I had a boyfriend, and I told him I did not. He kept asking me if I wanted to go clothes shopping with him and I did not. He kept asking me if I would let him go to some of my shows, and I had NO idea what he was talking about.

Finally, 6 months after coming out, of awkward misgendering and questions that didn’t make sense from my dad, he excitedly pokes his soft smooth little nerd head into my bedroom again and says “I found a movie about Your People.” My people. I was absolutely bewildered, but he was so excited and I knew he had been trying SO hard so I watched it with him. It was The Birdcage, and it was amazing. It also was revelatory in that I finally realized why my initially-supportive father seemed to be having such a hard time with my pronouns and stuff - he didn’t know what the difference between trans and doing drag was. After the movie he again asked if I would invite him to one of my shows, and I said, “Hey dad, you know how about half the world is women?” And he said “yeah,” and I said “Well, see, I’m on that half now. I’m not doing drag.” And it was like a switch flipped in his brain. He was like “omg that’s so easy? I was so confused about what to call you when?”

Anyway, my parents are charming and my family has been so kind and patient with me, I like sharing the stories of my little wins with them.

[hacksawing]

SUBSPACE WARMUP !!!

[mik3stuff]

ngl I love this in fandoms when a small fraction of the queer community simply decides that "we have too few transfem characters, what to do? hm I know! let's take that male character with extreme loser vibes and wet cat core and headcanon her as transfem! just for fun!" and then someone takes it to analyze and- wait, why does this headcanon actually even make sense…?

[frostlassstuff]

Visited North Carolina with a couple friends. Damn cold up there. Amber Waves by Ethel Cain on loop.

[ashes2caches]

so it turns out that wearing the flesh of your slain enemies does not count as ‘tgirl swag’

[marco-le-loser]

Tgirl swag 😎

[walmart-hrt]

[amazingdude76]

This is a pretty old drawing now but I thought it would be an alright first post? Please tell me what would be cool to post

[punkeropercyjackson]

Can white tboys shut up about Peter Parker for trans boy rep in Spiderverse when Hobie Brown already got us covered on that

It's aknowledged by most of the fandom he's trans-coded/meant to be seen as androgynous but rarely discussed he's most likely transmasculine specifically.The other characters refer to him as male with no protests from him so he's pretty obviously a guy,just not a cis one.So many black punk tmascs are Hobiesque,including myself,if you wanna say he dosen't have the 'vibes' he's a trans boy.None of the white ass trans memes i've seen applied to Hobie are accurate to his very black canon gender presentation and saying shit like a black child 'isn't a boy or a girl but a threat' is disgusting and tonedeaf and roots back to the history of degendering black people and is very obviously an unsubtle attempt by white transmascs to other black transmascs since they don't want to accept Hobie is the first trans Spiderman,not the white one

Or that 'Spiderman as a trans metaphor' was canonized by a Spiderwoman as a transfem narrative and trans girl fantasy to give trans women an authentic and unpalpable yet inherently lovable story about her personhood and how she/they don't deserve to die based on 'fate' abitrarily decided (trans)misogynistic rethoric created to treat (trans) women as expandable.Instead of some white boy with no personality or backstory who's entire character is 'Gwen's nerdy dead best friend'

And pretending Hobie's not a bisexual king over both his potential alt love interests being black instead of a shitty white boy he's obsessed with like them other mlm ships you stan and ignoring Margo completely like you do every other black girlfriend in media and don't even let him and Gwen be boyfriend and girlfriend despite the so called 't4t yearning' y'all are always whining about(and Gwen should've been a lightskin afrolatina/black too but then y'all would've passed on Itsv to begin with).The only reason people popularly think Peter Parker is trans is Tom!Peter,who is a whitewashed Miles in his entire writing.'Trans Peter Parker' has always been about stealing from black trans men and now you're stealing from trans girls too.Peter isn't trans,Hobie is trans and Gwen is trans and Miles and Margo are probably trans

And no,you don't get two cakes.You cooked with whitewashed ingredients for african/latino recipes and bragged about 'improving' them so you ain't eating shit and you ain't Spiderman or an Anomaly,you're just a douchebag

[lizardho]

I came out to my dad as bisexual at 14 and I was PANICKED because I had a crush on a guy in my Boy Scout troop and thought I was Going To Hell Forever and he was so kind and understanding of my distress, but he had NO idea what bisexuality was. He just said “yeah but you like girls too? This is normal. Everyone is like this.” And I love my dad and trust him with my life to this day and the idea that the concept of bisexuality had not occurred to him had not occurred to me so I put it off.

By 16 though I had a crush on like THREE boys. Three entire boys in my Boy Scout troop. I felt like my sin was slowly advancing, until like an untreated cancer it had become metastatic. I remember bawling my L’il limp-wristed sissy eyes out in his big rumbly truck on the way home from a scout meeting and him telling me that it was OK, that he still loved me if I was gay, but that he knew I wasn’t gay because I still had crushes on women and that meant I was straight. I didn’t quite know how to explain that those felt *~*different*~* and that I felt like I was losing a fight to evil inside me but I again felt comforted by his reassurances and his genuine fatherly love.

At 18 I was like “hey I’m realizing all my friends are going on missions. I don’t wanna do that. Idk how to say that and I don’t have a ‘good enough’ reason to not wanna go.” So I just put it off. Again, my parents were extremely supportive of the information I gave them (I blamed it on perpetually forgetting to start the paperwork.) and one day my mom texted me that she had done the paperwork for me! And that all I needed was to get a physical! So I did that (it was awkward af tbh, my hernia check was done by a trainee doctor and she spent like 3 minutes fishing around my inguinal canals before her attending rescued me) and was sent to Mexico City where I learned that in addition to dipshit himbos with strong hands and scruffy guys with artistic hearts I was REALLY into chubby Latin men with strong personalities who bullied me a little when I lived in Mexico.

I remember my first companion got annoyed with me during an argument and said we were just gonna wrestle and whoever won the wrestling match won the argument (I stg I am dead serious this happened.) I was like…SWEATING when he tore off his tie and threw his white button-down shirt onto the ground (I won btw, don’t ask me how).

I remember one of my companions with this really intense, almost manic energy telling me that he was gonna make sure I was safe in a new area I didn’t know very well. He cooked breakfast for me and we’d go shopping together on P-Days and in the mornings before breakfast he’d jog around and do pull-ups with his shirt off and I’d do anything but look at him because my face would break out in a sweat so intense he’d think I was crying and come over to see if I was OK and somehow make it worse. He let me play D&D with myself in the evenings even though it was against mission rules because he knew how lonely and stressed I was.

I remember one of my companions was a big chubby man with a loud voice and a great sense of humor. He was kind and direct when addressing conflicts with me, and always bragged about how he knew the secrets of women’s minds and it felt like he really did since it almost always boiled down to “Treat Them Like People and Love Them a Lot. Don’t Stop Being A Person For Them. Also Eat Them Out Sloppy Style.” Our P-Day activities sometimes felt like dates, and it seemed like he was more attentive to my emotional state than I was since he was always the first to suggest we slow down our Divinely Mandated, God-Ordained, Super Sacred Work and Wonder to get a snack or check out a Pawn Shop (I love Pawn Shops).

I remember another companion who asked me to bully him every time he did something against his goal of losing weight. It was like he gave me Carte Blanche to take out my crush on him by being a nuisance and I LOVED that. I remember having a breakdown one day after we’d spent the afternoon frantically cleaning our disgusting-barely-habitable mission house to make it look less vile that it was (not our fault imo?) and I started bawling and he pulled me into a hug and he smelled good and he told me he knew it wasn’t just the house and that I was mad at him for being a Huge Dickhead for about a week (true) and that he would work on it. (He’s also a huge chaser but that’s a separate thing.)

I remember one of my companions waking up early (and our schedule is already built for sleep deprivation) to make me a “birthday cake” from knock-off Nutella and bread. He used matches for candles and woke me up, lit the ‘candles,’ pulled them out, then smashed it in my face and took a bunch of pictures while I was still madrugada and disoriented as fuck. He had the same sense of humor as one of my HS crushes and I could push his buttons pretty easily which was so fun.

I came home from my mission and started back at BYU where I became actively and aggressively suicidal. I had a stalker the year I moved up there and my dad’s solution to that was to get me a gun. I know he wouldn’t have bought me a gun if he could have read my mind, but I had a loaded pistol under my bed during a trifecta faith/sexuality/gender crisis and that was not helpful. I remember that the day I decided to kill myself I figured I’d call the BYU CAPS and see if I could get into therapy because it felt like what I was “supposed to do” so I could check my suicide boxes. My therapist was the guy who’d helped me pick a major the year before and was this drop-dead gorgeous Hawaiian man who cried when I told him how I’d been feeling.

A few weeks into therapy I met another stunning man with soft eyes and a scruffy illegal-at-BYU beard he kept pushing his luck with. He was funny, kind, patient, married, and wouldn’t give me the time of day if he knew I was crushing on him. We were in my history of psych class, which was inarguably the worst psych class I have ever had, and we studied together for every assignment and test and I realized that my feelings for him and for all the men I’d already mentioned were in direct conflict with my faith and relationship with God. My already agonizing spiritual conflict became even more wretched and as a result of this plus some other tightly-packed experiences with Mormonisms bullshit, I left the church.

After leaving the church I decided to move back to AZ and transfer to ASU. My mom helped me get a dog since I think it had started to dawn on my family that my mental health was barely getting me through the day, and she knew that we both loved dogs. Madi made my last year at BYU livable while I got my shit together and transferred. In that last year, I went on a date with quite possibly the only semi-openly-out trans person on BYU campus. It was not a great date imo, I was not doing well, but the person I spoke with was fun and fascinating and talked to me about Gender Dysphoria and it really cemented my need to go. To leave and never come back to that fucking school.

I started at ASU a month after my last semester at BYU and within a very short time frame it felt like I was coming back together, like a puzzle magically putting itself together in an environment that wasn’t slowly draining that puzzle’s will to live.

On the 4th of July, the year I started at ASU, I saw a transition timeline photo of a gorgeous happy beautiful happy radiant happy woman and her former Mormon missionary self and I realized the light that was on in her eyes was the light that was off in mine. I looked into transitioning for 3 days, sleeping about 10 hours total during that time. I started talking to other trans people on Reddit (one of whom is now my beautiful fiancée @cintailed) and after about a month of making preparations to be disowned and kicked out, something I was not sure would happen but was ready to go through to Turn On The Lights, I came out to my family and it was amazing. I started HRT a month after that. I secretly dated some dorky guys for about a year while I applied to grad schools. I got into a great grad school for me and my needs. I got FFS. I did my trainings and classes. Me and my fiancée moved in together after some LDR shenanigans. We’ve lived together now for 4 years of basically marital bliss. We have a cat named Grandmother Esmeralda Weatherwax who bites the hell out of my feet about three times a day. My bi-cycle continues to be part of my life but now it’s not as scary. Baby gays in my life have started to look to me for advice. Idk how this all happened so fast. When the years, months, weeks, days, and hours seems to crawl by so slowly now they are rushing past me so fast it’s almost bewildering. Whereas before I felt like I was living on borrowed time, past my ‘expiration date,’ now it feels like I can Fucking Breathe. I’m training myself to slow down now and it feels worth it to Live In The Moment.

Idk why I wrote this. Idk why these thoughts only seem to come up on Sundays when I’m supposed to be writing my dissertation. Idk why I’m crying rn or why I feel so happy. I’m gonna post this shit then get on with my dissertation I guess. Read more Terry Pratchett and give yourselves the time you need. Get a pet. Talk to someone. Re-examine the events that brought you here. Be gayer. Love y’all 💕

[localsoulsalesman]

I really hope they release something explicitly saying Gwen is trans because I am so sick and tired of all the hate of people calling us delusional and "pushing our own agenda". Even w/ all the evidence

[granny-garbanzo-gay-baby-blog]

I have a. New sbibling. Her name is. Forg and she. Is humongous. And stinky. I love her.

[witch-king-of-dathomir]

completely entranced by her loser boy girl fag energy

[uh-mc]

Dedfish my beloved