#Tbh I am worried people just straight up will hate both of those projects.

[problemsynth]

I think maybe I should draw all my blorbos on like a height chart

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

y’know the one thing I hated while I was doing my arts degree, and still hate after having graduated from it, is the condescending statement/belief from people that “oh why didn’t you just do a more useful degree like maths or science???? and not your useless bullshit mickey mouse arts degree, which was never intended to give anyone jobs outside of teaching, anyway!” or some other horrendous bullshit, such as: “why didn’t you just stay with communication & media studies and complete the marketing & PR major???? you would’ve had a job after all of the unpaid internships you do throughout the course!” or whatever. (media and communications is abbreviated to m&cs further down in this post, just an fyi).

but, meredith. do you know that even people with science & maths degrees struggle to find meaningful work that’s related to their degrees? do you know that some of those people will turn to teaching anyway just because they feel like there’s nothing else that they can do??? do you know that some people (mainly me and probably quite a few others) just can’t handle maths past like idk year 6 level??? I would’ve been completely and utterly fucked if I even tried to set foot in first year uni science or maths subjects. even though some of the content did interest me.... (also there’s the fact that my handwriting wasn’t good enough for diagrams etc etc in maths & science- but that’s a whole other topic not for this post).

like I had to totally skip out of psychology/sociology and even the PR major, bc they required you to do statistics subjects.... where no matter what level of study I would’ve/could’ve done for those subjects, i would’ve still failed them spectacularly because my mind really struggles with processing and working with numbers. but that’s besides the point.

hey earl, do you know some people simply do not suit particular fields of “real world” or “practical” study areas like business subjects? trust me. I tried that one sem of marketing 101 and intro to management/ business communications in first year. and you know what I found? that my mind just could not take the complete and utter dryness of the content of marketing theory and, again, numbers. and that’s despite the earnest encouragement of my tutor, who thought I had a knack for marketing. i literally almost fucking died in that business communications subject... even though the lecturer seemed to like me as well. but as i thought further ahead into my degree in comms & media, i dreaded it. I absolutely fucking dreaded it. the PR stuff sounded as equally dry & boring (besides the point that every project was group work lmao) and so did upper level marketing subs in advertising/marketing strategy/various fields of marketing etc etc. i couldn’t stomach that lmao. and besides the point, the analysing of media just bored the fuck out of me too, for some reason. I just didn’t like the subject. hell, even my advanced diploma in marketing from business college was a fucking hard slog for me.

but when i sat in my english, philosophy, (kind sorta) history and -further down the track- creative writing subjects.... I fucking loved them. I was writing like I’d always wanted to. okay yes I did get pretty dismal marks in most of my philosophy and english exams or assignments. but I don’t fucking care. I was there doing what my mind was built for. if id tried another business subject, like intro to economics or even gone back to redo that “intro to management”/“business communications” (or whatever it was called) as an elective/as electives, i probably would’ve dropped out of either of them in the first 2 weeks. whenever i read those subject descriptions, they literally put me to sleep.

also, for the media and comms point. do you know that there’s loads of media & comms students that don’t get jobs because there’s just such a HUGE intake of students in those courses??? do you know that that the most popualr field in that degree stream (at least when I started that degree at my local home uni in 2015) was journalism & professional writing??? where literally EVERYONE was aiming to be a journalist????

I was one of the very, very few people when I began in media and comms, to outwardly say that she was there to do marketing or maybe the marketing & PR double major.... and everyone looked at me as if I was insane. “why don’t you want to be a journalist? I think journalism is so cool and that I’m more likely to get a job in that than you are in marketing or PR. you actually engage with real people in journalism and do meaningful stuff with the community!” was one of the utterly dumb responses I sometimes got from people in that course, when I told them the above. but you know what kelsey, or, trent? neither one or any of us are “more likely” to get jobs in media & comms... when you’re both competing against people with “proper” straight journalism degrees who might have more media experience than you- if you didn’t do an internship or do some uni newsroom/magazine or whatever.... or maybe more streamlined (if that’s the right word) media &comms degrees.... as well as generally competing against each other, in the same field, for the fucking same exact jobs. while im competing against commerce students doing marketing and PR and people doing the PR & marketing major in m&cs.

also in relation to the above, doing multiple unpaid or even severely underpaid internships in journalism, or even marketing, probably won’t fucking secure your chance of getting a bloody job, adam. just shut the fuck up. those internships may have helped you. but they most likely won’t help most people, theresa. because there’s only a tiny freakin chance that the place that they worked for will actually give them a guranteed job at the end of their internship’s timeframe or at the end of their whole degree. it’s a fucking scam lmao.

and plus, (not to be as rude as you were to me).... but why the FUCK would you want to go into journalism.... when it’s been debased so fucking much by media outlets like buzzfeed; writing nothing but clickbait bullshit listicles.... and is polluted by internet virality.... so much so, that more than half of the people my course had the career goal of being a viral youtuber or an instagram influencer???? like i’m sorry. this is a dumb asf course, no matter the field you’ve chosen to study.... and there’s no way that a single one of you will be a successful viral youtuber or an instagram influencer???? what on fucking earth led you to believe that????

like no offence. but there’ll only be a lucky, lucky, lucky few who get to be the next jennamarbles, ray william johnson, pewdiepie, lily singh, tanya hennessy, jeffree star, james charles, etc etc.... or hell, even friendlyjordies (if you want some satire & politics). and for instagrammers.... idek know them. someone list some instagrammers lmao. but my point still stands.

being an influencer or youtuber- both with huge followings- is a fucking pipe dream- as much as me being a hugely successful author is. it only goes to the insanely lucky, lucky few who have the right connections and the right digital savviness/finesse to grow to be uber successful.... or who started super early, before it was even considered a job title (like jenna mourey/marbles and ray william johnson listed above, and several others not listed who have big fan followings on here) and eventually grew to be the first original titans of the youtuber job title.

or again, they already have some type of other successful media career (like tanya hennessy is an aussie radio announcer. jeffree star had a short lived myspace music career in the late 000s mostly, and made cameos in emo music videos and LA ink at the time also, for example) so that they can successfully fund their youtube channels and/or instagrams as side projects or whatever, as part of their media portfolio.... and they also know how to engage and grow follower bases etc. because they already have an existing one. so it’s twice as easy for them.

tbh i actually entered the m&cs course bc of my use of this hellsite and all the weird trends it had and stuff.... but I eventually got over that as I realised that I just did NOT fit into that field of study. I realised I was too shy... and I also just hated the fact that I had to learn how to use twitter and wordpress and probably eventually snapchat & instagram 😂

i had also gotten sick of follower counts and “growing a following”- considering that by 2015, I’d hit over 3,000 followers on here, I think.... and I realised just what energy and time it took to build this blog.... and my followers.... that I just didn’t have the energy to expend on other platforms for the same thing lmao. like it seemed like more wasted time. I was tired. in addition to that, i also realised that i didn’t want to waste my whole fucking career on the internet worrying over a business’s/company’s multiple corporate social media channel follower counts and image etc.... when i’d done enough of that for myself on this hellsite lmao. doing that stuff with other students in the m&cs course seemed fake asf, especially when it came to giving feedback comments etc lol.

but do you know that one place where you don’t have to give a flying fuck about followers, post views/comments, and blog views? philosophy and english. lmao 😅. no one gives a fuck what you say. unless, of course, you have the evidence and the force of argument to back your pov up. that’s what I was about and am still about. I loved reading and analysing the many books I had to read (contrary to the complaint posts that I made on here lmao)- whereas learning about media and who owned what and how media is manufactured- just made my brain freeze. and although I didn’t do my readings in philosophy (lmao)- i enjoyed a good bulk of the content I had and the issues it involved. doing media & journalism subjects in the m&cs degree, on the other hand, terrified me, bc it meant I had to get in front of a camera and speak- which also scared me bc i look & sound terrible on camera lmao 😂. but I didn’t have to do that almost throughout the entirety of my arts degree (im obvs not counting class presentations in this lol). but do you get my point???

and also the teaching comment. don’t get me wrong, i know a good bunch of people go into teaching after their arts degrees... including many of my friends; and a load of the people I was in my arts degree with. but that is mainly because with other degrees like journalism or media & comms or whatever other fields that they overload into uni arts departments- have taken our job titles away, in a sense....

so, then you’re practically forced to either go into teaching, or go into something outside of your expertise; like idek human resources management/a MBA via a masters.... or, again into something like librarianship via postgrad study- so, that for the love of fucking god- you have a job title to whack next to your name-!!!-instead of just “arts graduate” or “english major” or “philosopher” that all mean fuck all. and that’s because those labels sound vague, unhelpful, undefined and useless; as that’s opposed to something like “teacher” or “librarian” or even “information specialist”. all those titles/labels sound defined, and have actual useful concrete skills: like coding, database creation and maitenance & information retrieval (amongst other things), for a librarian/an information specialist, for example. these skills are then translated into something that you can physically demonstrate to people.... unlike with philosophy and english where people perceive that it’s just “all in your head” and “doesn’t produce anything worthwhile” bc of your very obvious skills that everyone has of communication and writing. like idk. anyway.

anyway here’s my rant for november.

[dachi-chan25]

GoT Season 8 Episode 1: The Pointy End Recap

Gods I am back on my bullshit but I can't help it 'cause I had too many thoughts about yesterday's episodes.

Disclaimer: So if you know me or my blog you know I don't root for D Targy (I write it like this cuz i don't want this post to pop up in her tag) and that she sometimes annoys the crap out of me, also i don't root for her bland ass romance or anything magical lizard related. I support House Stark 100% so ofc I believe in Pol!Jon (and more over I am a Jonsa shipper so ofc Imma write about that) and if you don't agree or don't feel confortable with any of those things this Recap is not for you (if you come here to troll I'll just ignore you anyway so don't waste your time and energy like that)

With that said let's begin!

.

-The episode starts with a young boy running to meet the Queen's entourage, we already see a lot of peasants and common folk gathered there, Arya sees the boy and smiles fondly (she is totally reminiscing when she did the same when King Bobby B visited WF) This shots made me feel very nostalgic as they parallel very closely S1.

Another parallel that it's included here is Jon and D arriving all regal couple like, I was just remembering about Bobby B and Cersei, and things are already on a visual side not working for them (d looks totally out of place with that flashy awkward coat, I mean the color, the cut, the red details, all of it makes her stand out like a sore thumb. On a visual level alone she does not belong there). The music is also worth noting, it starts off on a very ominious tone and then gets some heroic B bright undertones as Dr and Jon ride closer to he camera, but again falls into an ominious conqueror-villian entrance song.

The perspective shifts to Arya watching Jon and D riding (she doesn't seem happy to see D she kind of looks confused) but smiles when she sees Jon, we also see The Hound (Arya looks really confused, cuz she probably thought he was dead) and Gendry (she gives the cutest smiles ever,and yassssss Gendyra lives!!) riding behind them.

We get Varys and Tyrion riding in a carriage of sorts, and an unnecesary enuch joke *sigh* even Varys calls out Tyrion for it, and he is like idgaf cuz i got ballzzzz!! (Classy dude)

The common folk is not diggin this dragon kween business and obviously don't cheer or grovel at d's feet, she is very upset at this and Jon is like "I told you so", then the dragons approach and the people are terrified, they scream and run, worst of all D smiles and seems so smug (fuuuck her a thousand times, this proves she doesn't give a fuck about poor people unless they adore her, and that fear is just as well for her as respect, cuz this bitch is just like Cersei but dumber) and we don't really get to see Jon's reaction but come the fuck on!! This people Jon knows, some of them he has seen since he was a little boy, these are the people he is trying hard to protect and you think he is not gonna care for them just cuz d is pwetty?? Nah dude, he knows she cares about being worshipped (I meaaaan her long ass list of titles) but he thinks she is mostly harmless (may i remind you he still doesn't know about the TARLYS)

The camera follows the dragons and we see Sansa looking at them with worry (my poor girl, that's the adecuate reaction when you see monsters terrifying your people)

K, now we are seeing Jon in the courtyard, he sees Bran and immediately runs to him (you can clearly see Jorah helping D dismount in the background and that's hillarious cuz 2 seconds in WF and he is already leaving her ass behind in favor of his family), we even get a forhead kiss and Jon is pretty emotional at seeing his baby brother all grown up (tbh i find Bran's deadpan deliveries so funny, Jon looks confused af) he sees SANSA and biiiitch (I wanted to screenshot his face but I just gave up cuz it's very quick) the softness of his stare, the parted mouth, the way he just dives into her arms (Sansa stares at D while they hug like bih fuck off he is ours) . I want to address something real quick, yeah it was a shorter hug than we expected, but not less emotional ( Sansa was smiling and the look on Jon's face when he saw her) still it was 10000x times better than any Aegony scene because the affection is mutual Jon goes straight for a hug and Sansa opens her arms as opposed as Aegony scenes that rely heavily on D. Also I think this hug was shorter (and we see Jon pulling apart first) cuz d is watching, not only that but a lot of people are and i do think this season until the parentage reveal is out in the open they will be trying to keep their distances cuz they have feelings siblings are not supposed to have.

Jon asks for Arya, and Sansa says she is lurking somewhere with a smile (this reminded me of Cat asking about Arya on ep 1) and D approaches with the most forced smile ever, Jon introduces Sansa with her proper title first and then is like she is the kween D Targy forsaking all her thousand titles thank god. Also the first thing Jon says is that Sansa is his sister which I'll talk about later. So D tries (and fails) to be charming, saying how beautiful WF and the North (she says it's as beautiful as Jon said) and compares Sansa's beauty to it which had me wondering stuff.

A) so we never get Jon and D talking about Jon's siblings (another aegony is doomed moment) but he does mention briefly Arya and Bran cuz he thought they were dead, but Sansa??? Unless a thrid party brought her up he never talked about her which leads me to think D had no idea about Sansa being Jon's sister and that is why he breaks the hug and introduces he as his sister frist of all.

B) By talking about Sansa's beauty and how Jon talked about it, it implies they did talk about Sansa and that Jon said she was beautiful ??? Cuz that's the way D made it sound xdddd.

Ofc i think the A to be more like lyrics cuz Jon is playing his cards very close to his chest, but I thought it was funny.

Sansa brushes her of and delivers the WF is yours your Grace bs. Duuuude she is not even trying to be charming (she is corteous enough but barely) like she would have played the modest naive Maiden and said "not as beautiful as you, your grace" (bihhh d would have loved this shit) nor even a gracious thank you. And i wonder whyyy?? As far as she knows she is an ally, and yeah she doesn't trust her damn she doesn't even like her but that hasn't stopped her before like damn she was all charm when she met Roose and Ramsey for the 1st time and she hated them!!!! What I think is happening is that LF'S words are still in her mind about Jon marrying D, and Jon separated too quickly from their hug, and now he is standing beside this woman calling her queen, and yeah I see the jealousy maybe she doesn't know why fully maybe she is just starting to realize her feelings and is all projecting them onto the he betrayed the north's trust but I do feel it goes beyond that and it shows.

Bran interrupts before things get uglier with D and Sansa, with news about the wall, D looks shocked (bet she thought she was the only one who could control dragons) Jon looks like he is about to have a pánico attack.

They have a meeting with the northern Lords in the Great Hall (it is very curious that Jon is seated between d and Sansa, when befitting her new title D should be in the middle, D&D are driving this love triangle home) but from the get go we see that Sansa is the one running stuff and doing everything a queen should, she asks Ned Umbr about his people, he says they need more wagons and horses (I am sideeyeing D so hard at this moment) Sansa bids him to go to Last Hearth and bring as many ppl as he can.

Lyanna Mormont then proceeds to rip Jon a new one (but Lyanna like everyone else isn't really getting the full picture) and Jon looks at Sansa for support (like curious, as Lyanna is talking about D and she is his lady love and stuff you'd think he would look at her to gather strenght or resolution for what he is about to say but nope) but she is like 'dude you deserve it' and I would say she is right but like wasn't Sansa defending him to everyone that would listen last season ??? She literally said she respects Jon's desicions, nah this is her jealousy this is a go on prove me wrong, talk, give them (and me) and explanation of why u betrayed our trust for her. And Jon does look crushed when he sees he is not getting any support from her cuz if pol!Jon is right he did it! He listened to her, he was smarter than father and Robb, he brought an army home, and Sansa the one he did all this for still won't trust him that the North is his heart and home and he would do anything to keep it safe (like still pretty fucking unfair he wants sansa's blind faith without giving her anything in return but I get where he is coming from) and if pol!Jon is not real then they really destroyed Jon's character in favor of the blandest romance ever and I can't get behind that way of thinking because before I even shipped Jonsa I was a fan of both Jon Snow and Sansa Stark and I believe and support them both.

Honestly my boy doesn't even try to sell D, he is just like we need allies!! Tyrion just about gives up cuz he thinks Jon is a bumbling fool with no idea of how the game is played (lmaooo) and tries to sell D plus the idea that Cersei is sending them the Lannister army (I think is very important jon didn't mention this and I will go on about it later) Sansa is just about fed up with this bs, and asks a real important question about how da fuck is she supposed to feed this big ass army plus 3 dragons that she didn't account for and she doesn't have any obligation towards, like that's d's job, even worse d's haughty response (you can see Jon doesn't like this one bit) like honestly I had never felt more annoyed by d she is already a villian threatening Sansa in her own home for daring to care more about her people than about d's lizards, and i don't know how people are ok with that, like dude y'all are entitled to your own opinión and to loving your faves, but this shit was awfull.

We see carts of dragonglass in the courtyard, Gendry is giving instructions and Lord Royce is just leaving Sansa looking at all this activity when Tyrion approaches Sansa.

This is already to long and I have much to say about the Tyrion-Sansa convo, so let's go on in part 2!!

[gayasinstupidpodcast]

What’s up gamers!!! Our fourth episode plowed through the chaos of thanksgiving holidays and is Here w/ some Facts and Opinions about creating shit and being LGBT and how being LGBT influences creating shit. HEADS UP we recorded this while I had a cold so my voice is probably a little off, but ik Isaac put SO much work into the editing so it would be ready on time and we have recorded statements from some amazing artists (transcriptions under the cut below!) & this is honestly one of my favorite episodes we’ve done so far, so give her a listen if you’re gay or enjoy fun things!

BIG thank you once again to everyone who participated in this month’s episode!! Your contributions are so valued and so beautiful!!

You can find us on the Itunes Podcast App/Webpage at Gay As In Stupid Podcast! You can also find our episodes uploaded to Youtube and Soundcloud!

You can also follow us on twitter at gayasinstupid!

Further Reading on LGBT Artists

Montage of a Queering Deferred: Memory, Ownership, and Archival Silencing in the Rhetorical Biography of Langston Hughes

The Political Provocations of Keith Haring 

Pop art politics: Activism of Keith Haring 

E M Forster’s Gay Fiction

Alok Vaid-Menon Tells Us What It’s Like To Be Femme In Public

Shea Diamond Speaks Her Truth

Aaron’s 2018 November Recs!

Alok Alok Vaid-Menon is one of my favorite poet/activist/performance artists out there! Their writing and stage presence is gorgeous and witty in a way that’s SO clever and still feels like you’re in a room trading jokes you don’t need to explain with your closest trans friends. The way they balance their art creates a real, deeply touching experience that feels very essential to our world.

Miles (2016) Miles is set in 1999 and is a coming of age story about a gay teenager trying to get a volleyball scholarship for college in Chicago. It’s not revolutionary and it’s not over the top dramatic, but it’s funny and honest and it makes me feel nice. Definitely the movie to watch when you’ve just been through something emotionally taxing and need a light crying session and some mediocre pastries.

Isaac’s 2018 November Recs!

The Adventure Zone I know half of you already kin the Mcelroys while the other half either don’t know or don’t care, but the Adventure Zone is one of my most favorite things in the world. It’s a DND podcast (yes, all episodes are transcribed, and they have a graphic novel for the first arc of Balance with a second one on the way!) by three brothers plus their dad, and not only does it have the most amazing story and is ungodly funny, but TONS of gays (Griffin went ape with those Lesbian NPCS)! And just because they can! Same with trans characters. It’s a story where they just exist, and that’s really important to me because in a lot of media LGBT have to almost prove why they deserve to take up space. And it’s not just something that goes on in their first campaign, Amnesty also has those sweet sweet gay! I could talk about this podcast for hours, so if you needed that final push to give it a listen, THIS IS IT!

Stardew Valley You get to farm and be gay. And if THAT hasn’t sold you on this charming video game, then maybe the super cute graphics, beautiful soundtrack and a handful of interesting characters will! TBH I spend so much time playing this game it’s concerning. It’s just such a fun way to relax, and I just really REALLY like video games were I can chose to be gay. Like. God Tier. YOU CAN HAVE CROPS AND CHICKENS AND BE GAY C’MON YALL!!

The Amazing Quotes And Artists Featured!

Meg | instagram | esty

“My identity as a bisexual woman influences my art in many ways. As a woman, i create art about the issues that effect me, such as abortion and gender equality, in order to resonate with the people that matter most to me. As a bisexual individual, my subjects often appear from a gaze that falls outside of the stereotypical eye. My figure drawings and portraits all come from a place of admiration, and don’t fall into the stereotype of the male gaze or womanly care- they are the space inbetween, equally sexualized and normalized. I feel lucky to be a bi gal in the art world because it is a place that is my own to create in. There are so many queer artists that i look up to such as Mapplethorpe and Warhol, and many female artists i can cite as influence (Jenny Holzer, Kiki Smith, and Louise Bourgeois to name a few). My identity gives me a whole new world of content to draw from and allows my work to resonate with a wider audience, and I really think that any artists goal is to reach and touch as many people as possible.“  

Cameron | twitter | instagram 

“I don’t think that it influences the form really, but it definitely influences the subject matter! (Much as I hate to admit it, my identity influences the majority of choices I make in life.) I write a lot of poems about lgbtq related things and religion, as well as other stuff too. I was raised catholic, so realizing that I was “different” at more than one point in my teen years was scary AF. Being a member of the lgbtq+ community and also trying to still feel like I belong, or wanting to, in a religious community is hard, the two things are usually at a crossroads in my life so writing about them makes it easier for me to get through. My hope is that someday someone reads what I wrote and finds some peace in their own life/experience.” 

Vince | art instagram

“Well, being transgender I feel like I’m constantly aware of the lack of representation of my community, and I feel like it might be because of that I tend to experiment with showing all sorts of different type of people in my work. Because there’s so much diversity in the world, why not showcase that?”

Fox | art instagram  

“Oof…I’m gay so my characters always be gay. Gotta Fill the void in media w my own bullshit so I don’t have to rely on straight showrunners who will inevitably discard the character since they themselves seem to have no personal attachment and treat lgbt characters as disposable extras. Bc if I don’t at least attempt to create representation in the field I’m going into then I can’t rlly complain about the lack of it right? If I don’t try and change it I can’t complain about the lack of change so being an lgbt artist is lowkey Big Pressure to be revolutionary in your work but sometime…..I just wanna draw funkey animeal and that’s aight too”

Jen | twitter | instagram

“As a female bisexual poet, I worry often that my poetry and art will be too niche to be appreciated. I’ve spent years editing my poetry down to its barest bones in hopes that someone will relate to it. Changing pronouns back and forth because I worry that if I do talk about a woman, the poem will be stripped of its context and suddenly be about my queerness when in reality it never was. When I write about love and people I have dated and have crushed on, I want the poem to exist outside of the gender of who I love. I fear my authorial death will result in a complete misinterpretation of what I mean. When I write, it truly does not matter to me if I am writing about a woman or a man. If I feel what I write and I can make someone else feel it too does it matter that I also love women? I write what matters to me overall, regardless of gender, I try to make my poetry as true as possible. Sometimes, when I catch myself over editing I try to take myself back to the moment, to the person, what I loved about him or her. “

Lain | art instagram

“My LGBT Identity has significantly impacted almost all of my art, especially my work over the last two years. Ever since I have allowed myself to accept that I am trans and began my transition (6 months on T!), the impact that my Roman Catholic upbringing has had on my bisexual trans identity has bled into my artwork. Because of the way I was raised, accepting and allowing myself to be authentic has been an upward struggle. And what better way to process and document struggle than art?  

Much of my recent work has had a focus on the trans body, particularly the “sanctity” of self-actualization and the god-like power that comes with accepting and creating yourself in the unique and exceptional way that LGBT people must in order to live authentically. Two of my pieces on this topic were actually recently exhibited at UWM in the Trans-lucent exhibition, and will remain there until December 15th (I think). I got sick and tired of never seeing trans representation, so now I am creating that space that I crave in my own work.”

Kobe | instagram | soundcloud

“My art from is very influenced by my LGBT identity. It is very influenced by my LGBT black Identity. I think that whenever an artist makes their art (in my case writing music, singing, dancing) they should incorporate as much of themselves as possible. I think my LGBT identity definitely adds a sense of representation as well. I want people like me to listen to my music to know they aren’t alone. So it influences my work a lot. “

Nat | art instagram

“I think the fact that I am part of the LGBT+ community influences my art directly. Even though I don’t draw as often as I wish, I believe both my drawings and college projects (I am a 3d art/animation student), and my creativity in general is inspired by my personal experiences as a gay woman and common things experienced by the community. I try as often as I can to bring representation of some kind in the things I do, mainly personal projects. I also feel that it influences me on my motivation to keep creating; whenever I listen to, see drawings, watch movies or see whatever form of artistic expression from LGBT+ artists it gives me the energy to keep going, to keep creating.”

[peachymhaechan]

Ten as your best friend

Warnings: language

A/N: Just something I thought of while staring at my ceiling at three am :)

okay let’s be real for a sec

ten would be one of the best best-friends in the entire world

yeah he might be sassy and tease the other members for some of the straight bs they say (this is 20gayteen, after all) 

BUT he’s also one of the sweetest babies in the whole universe ok

protect him at all costs

ANYWAYS

he’s the type of bff to show up at your house uninvited at 11 at night with a pizza and you guys spend the night gossiping and gorging yourselves 

so it’s pretty much the best relationship ever, really

he’d be the best friend you’ve had since childhood

you guys were next door neighbors and Ten being Ten pushed himself into your life

there you were, lil four year old you, chillin’ in your backyard in your lil sandbox just living your best life, when Ten threw a ball over the fence and into your yard

but that wasn’t it

no

he fucking destroyed your sandcastle,,,, what a little BITCH

automatically you hated the kid 

his family had just moved in, so that was the first impression he left on you

oh, boy, was it a good one!

“Hey, that’s my ball!” he called, running around the fence from your front yard and into the back yard around the side of your house

yo wtf you’re not allowed to just come into my yard ?? I don't know you ??

“Who are you?” you asked, trying to be mean bc!! he just fuckin!! destroyed your castle!! not cool!!

“My name is Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul, but I go by Ten. I just moved in next door! Can I please have my ball back?” 

the boy didn’t seem mean, but his luck made him mean

“no”

“I- but why?”

“Because it destroyed my sand castle.” 

“I’ll help you make a new one, I’m sorry uh, what’s your name?”

“..... Y/N.” 

and then the boy started getting to work, fixing what he had broken without asking any questions

the whole time he chatted away, talking to himself half the time

thus, a beautiful friendship had been born 

in elementary school, you guys were inseparable 

in different classes??

not for long

don't worry, ten went home and cried and had his mom call the school and change him into your class

he wasn’t at school for the day?? 

you went to the nurse and cried until one of your parents picked you up

yes, you were those bitches

in middle school, it was hard as hell to adjust to changing classes

and y’all couldn't get away with complaining to the school about classes

so you guys had to get used to not being around each other 24/7

that being said, any time you guys had free time, you can bet your ass you’d be with each other

oh, didn’t get slammed with homework??

your ass is in ten’s basement, playing video games 

oh, not doing anything in class??

ten already has a pass to come to your class

the classes that you DO have together tho

look out world!!

y’all are THE Best Friends of your school

any group projects you have in shared classes??

y’all get together to work on it but dick around until the last minute

somehow still get an A??? hmmmm

p.e. is definitely a class y’all have together

every year in middle school, there would be a big dodgeball tournament in every gym class

every year, the teacher would make sure you and Ten were on opposite teams

not bc he wanted to get you guys to socialize with other people, but bc it was entertaining to watch you guys go against each other

it’d always end with you being the only person on your team and ten being the only one on his team

the entire class would watch and be completely absorbed in your full on fuckin duel

lots of names would be called, lots of exposing would be done

it’d always end with you winning, tho

“I LET YOU WIN!!” yeah right, ten

once high school hit, you both started dating

y’all wouldn’t really know how to act around your dates tho so you guys would have boot camp for dating

ten would show you how to act around guys, tell you what they find attractive, help you text them, etc

tbh ten didn’t need that much help, he’s a natural fuckboy flirt

when you did go on your first date, you can bet your ass that ten was there, lurking in the shadows to make sure everything went well

first breakup? 

don’t worry, ten climbed through your window with a bunch of junk food and all the love he could give

one of you got your license?

rip the world, y’all would be out there until curfew just driving in circles bc hey guess what?? you can now!!

late night ice cream runs to your local ice cream shop

late night (if you’re from America or any country with em) Walmart trips to buy random shit you don’t need and to people watch

you practically live at your house, and he practically lives at yours 

he is at your place sometimes when your family isn’t

you just walk in and find him chillin on your couch

a normal Tuesday tbh

sometimes you are over at his place when he isn’t home, just hanging out with his family

sleepovers were very common

during the school week, too (gasp!) 

your parents knew that if he wasn’t at your house, you’d stay up all night on facetime or skype 

so what’s the point in not having sleepovers?

plus, they knew that your relationship was not romantic, so they didn’t really care that much

graduating high school was rough to say the least

you guys had been with each other your whole life?? so graduating was scary

you both had always gone into the unknown hand in hand, but this unknown was one you had to jump into alone

and it fucking terrified the both of you

but hey, you knew that you’d have each other’s backs 

and you guys might not be physically next to each other, but you’d always be one text away

it was normal for the other to see things that reminded them of the other

lots of “hey, I saw this flower and it reminded me of the terrible drawing you made in third grade!” texts

lots of “I miss you bitch!” texts

lots of “I love you!” texts

lots of “I don’t know what I’m doing with my life anymore but I’m glad you’re still here for me” texts

because at the end of the day

life might suck ass,

but at least you have Ten by your side

a/n: by the time I upload this, it will be haechan’s birthday! my lil sunshine, happy birthday, bub! ilysm!

[blackstarising]

stranger things 2 thoughts under the cut:

okay, this season was good, so everything after this is just going to be details but the season overall was good. any roasting is meant to be more of a light grill or even a light toast, if you will

first of all, can they just mail noah schnapp his emmy early? because that boy literally did the Most™. honestly, i don’t believe i’ve ever seen a child actor come full force the way he did. seeing will suffer onscreen was incredibly heartbreaking and noah definitely brought that depth to his role.

the soundtrack, the bush and mandale signs, the arcades, the clothing, the houses, all 80s, all wonderful.

i think the duffer brothers are trying to actually kill me bc not only do we get hopper but we got hopper in flannel doing dad thing and i am left here very thirsty and very distressed rip i brought this on myself

tbh i forgot that hopper even had a daughter until the fifth episode, because everything he was doing looked so natural

and i know there’s some Discourse brewing about jane (i’m going to call her jane consistently from now on, she deserves to be called by her real name) and hopper’s relationship, especially their fight mid-season, so i’ll throw my proverbial hat into the Discourse Ring

i’m not going to excuse hopper, actually, and i’ll even confess that as a binch with anxiety who hates yelling, i had to turn down the volume of my computer and read the subtitles at one point because it really messes with me

definitely, threatening to turn jane back over to the authorities was wrong, and a new low. but i also saw that it was very much anger born of worry. like, parents get angry, and he had a reason to, because you could see that he was watching his daughter willingly put herself in danger, and it’s not like she’s unaware of the consequences

that being said, i don’t blame jane for leaving. you could see she was starting to match the whole experience to her time in the lab with papa and the fact that she was counting the days. damn

so in the end, they both acted shitty, but they both owned up to that and apologized. and i think david and millie did a really good job in really portraying a realistic father-daughter relationship. it’s not always cute, fluffy, one-shot, material, it’s messy and screamy and painful sometimes.

but ohmygoodness their relationship hurts so good the bedtime stories the waffles the halloween candy sorry i need a mome-

max!!!!!! i!!!! love!!!!! max!!!!!! ever since i learned what internalized misogyny was, i’ve been a bit wary of tomboy characters. but max didn’t play into those stereotypes at all, which is super refreshing. she was very content to be who she was, but she didn’t need to denigrate other girls to do so!!!!!! and it’s just good!!!!!!! 

(also the fact that the boys didn’t question that max beat their high score. also good, also pure, beautiful, beautiful)

[suddenly wearing a mourning veil] okay we need to talk about bob. right now.

i was one of the people who was suspicious of him (not because of shipping reasons, but the show makes you a little on edge, you know?) so i definitely squinted at everything he did but like he was so sweet and supportive of joyce and the boys and he didn’t like overstep his bounds but the way he tried to encourage will was so sweet and and and he’s just working at radio shack and he checks in on joyce to eat lunch with her and make out in the supply closet [hyperventilates a little] and and and the slow dancing in his halloween costume and he knows BASIC [is practically sobbing at this point] and he loves the byers and he died so that they could be happy and he’s a superherO AND I WOULD DIE FOR HIM AND SEAN ASTIN HOW COULD THEY DO THIS TO MEEE-

also when he’s talking about how he grew out of getting bullied and “I get to date Joyce Byers!” i get so close to tearing up every time you have no idea

i love how we get development for the rest of the party’s families, and barb’s families too. especially lucas’ sister, a gem, an icon™

and just!!!! lucas!!!!!! i really love how he’s the straight man of the group, but you can tell he’s matured over the year that’s past (also that voice drop, i see you caleb)

and lucas and max is now the only relevant ship on this show im sorry i dont make the rules

dustin is so sweet and big hearted and i really loved seeing more of his depth. tbh i may or may not have started projecting a little especially at the last ep when no one would dance with him!!!! but it’s so hard when you’re so loving and no one returns it in the way you’d want it to!!!! and the fact that he was even willing to love and protect a demon from another dimension dustin please don’t let the world rob you of your sweetness

i was crying about noah earlier but finn also basically killed it this season. you could tell that mike was Depressed with a Capital D and even though he didn’t get as much screen time as he did last season, every scene he did have was Quality,

especially the scene when he was talking about how he and will became friends and those TEARS FINN JUST DRIVE TO MY HOUSE AND STAB ME MYSELF

i really loved watching jane grow and come into her own this season! you can tell that she’s very aware of her power, but there’s that internal struggle about how to use it, which made the final battle that much more poignant.

terry’s backstory was immensely heartbreaking, i don’t have much left to say about it

i really did love kali, though! the detour from hawkins was a bit unexpected, but i love that world building aspect and im really intrigued about kali’s backstory and also her...front story? damn i hope she’s in season three because there’s so much more tea left.

and like....what about 1-7, 9, 10? are they still alive [insert eyes emoji here]

i’m going to be Agressively Heterosexual and agree that billy is pretty™ but at the same time i’m super worried that he’s going to be woobified because he is abusive, and i’m 95% sure he’s racist. so yeah i really hope that doesn’t happen but it probably will [sips wine tiredly]

STEVEN, MY MANS. the development that started last season really paid off here! tbh even i felt hurt when he asked nancy “you don’t love me?” like this binch has got feelings! and he’s not perfect but he’s a lot more genuine than i gave him credit for and the fact that he babysits kids and calls them shitheads but also lets himself get his ass beat for them. oh steve, keep growing but never change.

okay, nitpick and potential unpopular opinion, but i kind of hated the jancy development in this season

because there really wasn’t any, i don’t know, and this is really shitty of me for all my campaigning last year, but it just felt very cheap and superficial

like nancy and steve break up very early in the season, conveniently

and then when they’re at conspiracy guy’s house it just felt too explicit, too heavy handed and cliche, like Conspiracy Guy is basically spelling out their relationship to the audience

and then they do the thing where they just....have sex, and maybe it’s because i’m wearing my grey-ace hat, but like, honestly, two characters having sex doesn’t mean shit, anymore, okay?

its mostly because of hookup culture imo

so jonathan and nancy have sex, but there’s no confession of feelings or anything, so it just feels like a cheap way to show the audience THEY’RE TOGETHER NOW ARE YOU HAPPY

and then they don’t really interact as much in that context for the rest of the season, so it’s left kind of ambiguous

and i understand that it’s a 9 episode season and this is more of a C plot, but i think i would have rather had a slow burn throughout the 9 episodes [cough] like last season [cough] with a more affectionate moment at the end than just break up, nancy’s free, SEX, done

it’s not a very emotionally gratifying narrative as it is

second nitpick: tbh the final battle of this season felt a little too note for note to the final battle of the first season, and it felt repetitive at times, so i admit i kind of lost interest in the middle of episode 9

i really thought the “watering the story down” to get JusticeForBarb™ was really clever 

and just....joyce. i’ll never get over joyce. i have no complaints, she’s a mom who punches back and she’s tenacious and good hearted and amazing and she raised two amazing boys 

i don’t know i need a nap 

[cayannamon-arts]

Finally got around to sketching out my fanders sides ( tagged by the glorious @finiteframe3​ ♥♥ ) Description and musings for each are under the cut~

Tagging: @grayscaleeternity @hauntedspacekiwi and any of my followers who’d like to give it a shot! You don’t have to draw or write, just have fun if you decide to do it ;3

by @cayannamon-arts / @cayannamon

DO NOT REPOST OR USE WITHOUT PERMISSION or REMOVE TEXT

Reblogs and Likes always appreciated!     /      More Art

Odette – My Graceful Side

She’s beauty, she’s grace, she will legitimately punch you in your fucking face.

Responsible for all my fancy clothing that I don’t own and instead only dream about

Loves heels, a lot. Has amazing balance and is not afraid to use them as both fashion statements and weapons.

She’s who comes up with my well-timed quips, though not usually my puns.

Makes sure I fluidly go through social situations with poise and manner

Believes that being kind, but firm is the best way to win a room

The best public speaker tbh

The reason people hate me for ‘being good at everything’ even when I’m not at all good at everything, ever. – In Odette’s thinking: “What’s the point of doing anything if you don’t master a little bit of everything you try?”

You think you can win an argument? Wrong. She’s stubborn as a mule. You will at least understand her thinking and opinions before the end of the debate, even if the two of you agree to disagree, or she hasn’t done her job.

Is the one who would shut up an entire room if she strutted in and she loves that power.

Is the one that everyone comes to for advice because they (for some reason) trust her, even if she has no idea how to help solve the persons problems, or better yet, even KNOW THEM??

A back tattoo of wings that Ive always thought about getting for myself.

Phathusha – My Creative Side

Pronounced “Fah-thew (rhymes with hue) -shaa”

A mess™, but a beautiful one

She’s the one who makes my puns, blame her.

Has at least 45 art supplies on her person at any given time

Has so many big ideas and dreams that its impossible to keep up with them all- sticky notes everywhere

The reason I never get anything done and take on too many projects at once

Is either the most fashion forward™ or a disaster™, there is no in-between

Very, VERY hyper; giggles a lot and just wants everyone to love everything and be able to bring something good into others�� lives with what she makes

Has paint, or food, or something splattered somewhere most of the time; she can’t be bothered to remove it unless she feels it will ruin something else

Is the animal whisperer of the group; she just knows what she knows, even if it makes no sense

Is constantly curious™ and gets me into all the Wikipedia articles and how its made and everything under the sun- she cannot be satisfied because anything could bring her a new idea

Is chill most of the time- at least until she’s had a bright idea™, at that point it’s best to just run and hide.

Violet – My Aloof Side

Tired, Stress, god she’s a mess™

Goes from not caring and giving zero fucks to causing me to worry about every little mistake I’ve made from kindergarten to now in high definition, repeatedly.

Wears hoodies almost constantly, if those aren’t clean she’ll throw on anything that isn’t ‘dirty dirty’ aka, been worn for three days straight.

Time is the enemy

Get her too stressed and she will bite your head off with every sarcastic remark she can think up, which is a surprisingly large amount

Listens to music to try and put herself into fantasy situations so she can constantly work out how I should act in situations; she must be prepared for anything that could or will happen.

Also, what plays on the headphones could be anything from dark emo music to Korean polka ya just…ya just never know.

Is the reason I rehearse “here” in my head during each and every class rollcall

Hates making mistakes, but not as much as Odette

Doesn’t show emotions in front of people, ever. That would be ridiculous.

Is sure that everyone hates them and that they're constantly talking about her behind her back

Trust Issues™

She’s the reason I will stop talking to people for about a month before coming back to them as if I never left- she needs her freedom and alone time y’all

Is Tech support for everyone

Dimitri – My Ardor/Zealous side

My most masculine side

Very secretive and reserved

Suave and sophistication

Doesn't speak much, but when words are said, they're probably really important so you should listen up

Don't let the book fool you; it's a 50/50 toss up of a novel series or fan fiction

On a dime, can turn into a passionate zealot when you least expect it; you bring up a common interest? Expect to be tackled and or spitting theories at 2 am

A good judge of character

Wants something… But has no idea what.

Responsible for my inability to make decisive decisions. Loves to play both sides of the problem or situation.

Has a matching tattoo of wings on back to mirror Odette’s

A good listener but awful at communicating openly- it's a work in progress

Hair typically tied back; if not, shit’s about to go down

Loves tight clothing

Is a mystery *insert ghost emoji and theme song here*

Funfact: The white spots on the legs and characters aren’t just forgetfulness; It’s my vitiligo, or as I like to think, my happy clouds ;3