#TWO thanksgiving fics? wtf did they do to me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sun-summoning · 5 years ago

Note

Hi! Sorry to bother you, but I was wondering what happened to the fic the grad fad? I loved it but I can't seem to find it on FF. Thank you! :)

you know what i read this and had a moment of “wtf is the grad fad” followed by “it sounds SO FAMILIAR” then i looked through stuff on my computer and found a doc with that title that was last updated in 2013 and thought “oh god that’s when i graduated university wtf was this fic about???” i assume i deleted it off ffn back in the day bc i knew i’d never finish it.

anyway here’s all that i found:

Note: This is my last year of university and I’m actually quite sad, so this is mostly for my lawlz. But I promise I will have a plot.Warning(s): AU, going by my own university’s calendar Pairings: SasuSaku, NaruInoDisclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

SEPTEMBERi need a place to live

“Can I live with you?”

Sakura needed a home.

She was luckier than most people with her parents living just an hour and a half’s commute away from Konoha University, but she would rather pay rent every month than go through the two trains and two buses and twenty minute walk she spent her entire freshman year dealing with. She spent her second and third years living with Tenten, but that recently-graduated, totally lame, Judas loser decided to take the Next Step in her Relationship and Move In with her boyfriend, hence Sakura’s problem.

Sakura was homeless. Sort of.

Karin only raised an eyebrow at her before eyeing her one-bedroom apartment. There was a solarium, yes, but those doors were see-through and offered no privacy. “Seriously?”

But Sakura would not be moved. She nodded eagerly. “Honestly, I’d be down for a closet. Please? Lend me that room?”

“Fine.”

And so that was that.

Except it wasn’t.

It worked well enough, Sakura supposed. At the beginning, that is, when Sakura was still enjoying the remaining bits of frosh week and the constant keggers going on. On the first week of class—when all that happened was syllabi-reading and maybe an introductory lab or two that Sakura didn’t need—there were Mojito Mondays and Because I Freaking Feel Like it Tuesdays to go along with the traditional Thirsty Thursdays. For the first week of class, Sakura mostly came home to her glass room at Karin’s home in a lovely state of drunk or delirious.

But then she started coming home sober.

Second week struck and so did its readings upon readings upon readings. Sakura scrambled from the KU Bookstore to the shop for cheaper used books a few blocks away from the university where all the hipsters lived. She would then go to the printing press on the other side of the city for that course pack, and then to another printing press on the other side of the city for another course pack. Then she would settle down in the library with a chai tea latte and lemon poppy seed muffin and shut off her phone and get her readings done.

(Not that anyone was texting her, of course. Ino was basically ignoring the world and Naruto still felt like it was move-in time and Sakura knew for a fact he had a keg at his house and Sasuke and her basically didn’t talk unless they were forced to.)

In her second week of September, Sakura would come home extremely late, with aching shoulders and arms full of books.

In her second week of September, all Sakura would want to come home to was a cozy bed and ugly bunny slippers and Netflix. Instead, she came home to Karin’s bra on the sneakers Sakura left by the door and the beautifully permanent sight of Karin and Shikamaru doing the deed on the couch.

Sakura just sighed. “Guys, like, I eat my breakfast on that couch!”

They barely noticed her before Karin let out a squeak and they casually moved their canoodling over to her bedroom.

“Seriously?!” Sakura yelled, dropping her book bag and mourning the sight of the beloved Lazy Boy, forever tainted by Shikamaru’s naked ass, cute as it may have been.

Sakura plopped down on the carpet, sitting right in front of the recliner.

This wasn’t going to work.

“Can I live with you?”

Sakura twitched when she got no response. Ino had been like this all summer. She was in I’m-taking-my-LSAT-therefore-nothing-exists-but-these-LSAT-notes mode and essentially drowning everyone and everything. There was no time for double fisting the red sangria and the white sangria at Red Room after a long day of class, nor was there time to listen to Sakura propose potential research paper topics. Ino had quit her job and her social life in favour of studying, studying, studying.

“Ino?”

Ino had a pretty swanky place, actually – for a studio apartment, that is. But it was surprisingly large for a kitchen-living-room-bedroom hybrid monster. It even had a balcony!

“Yo! Blondie!”

Finally, Ino looked up. “What was that, Sakura?”

Sakura pouted.

They were at the coffee shop near the Bio labs on the west end of campus. Ino had only agreed to Sakura’s invitation when Sakura offered to buy her sleepless friend some coffee. Apparently the implied “you’ll have to listen to me when I speak” part of that deal went unnoticed, however. Great.

“Can I live with you?” Sakura repeated.

Ino didn’t miss a beat. “No.”

“What?” Sakura couldn’t help it. Her jaw literally dropped. She was ready to prepare some grand speech about friendship and bonds and love and all that jazz that Naruto would have been super proud of, but Ino waved her hand – granted, she looked more like she was trying to swat away some irritating bug.

“Sakura,” she said flatly, “consider the size of my apartment.”

“It’s fun-sized,” Sakura reasoned. “Super fun-sized.”

“No.”

“But I’m homeless!”

“You live like an hour away—”

“AND A HALF.”

“—you’ll manage.”

“But I’m homeless!” Sakura repeated pathetically, hoping that if she pouted Ino might have been moved.

But that was not the case. Ino’s eyes were already back on her binder of notes for her LSAT studying. “Nope.”

“You’re a heartless, wretched beast,” Sakura said. She gathered her things and made sure to grab the caramel macchiato she spent a grand four dollars on for some traitor. She stuck her tongue out when Ino let out an indignant cry for having her coffee stolen. “Sorry, I don’t buy drinks for jerks!”

“Just commute, you lazy baby!”

“I CAN’T HEAR YOU.”

“Can I live with you?”

Naruto didn’t look even remotely surprised to see Sakura on his front porch with a bright pink gym bag full of her clothes and a backpack that looked ready to burst at the seams. And he didn’t even want to think about how heavy that other bag pulling at her left arm was, considering all the textbooks sticking out of it.

Like the good friend he was, Naruto grabbed the bag of books and the bag of clothes.

“Come on,” he said, moving to the side so she could enter the house.

“You’re the best, Naruto!”

“Yeah, yeah…”

Sakura had been to Naruto’s place many times. It was a house in the so-called “student ghetto” just off of campus with an open-concept main floor and a fair number of bedrooms. If Sakura remembered correctly, Naruto had the big room in the basement, Suigetsu called dibs on the attic, and Sasuke and Shikamaru had rooms on the second-level. But now that Neji had moved in with Tenten—

“Am I getting Neji’s old room?” Sakura asked.

Naruto nodded, guiding her up the stairs even though she already knew where to go. “Yeah, I figured you’d be here eventually.”

“What?” Sakura felt tears spring in her eyes. She couldn’t help it. She was tired and stressed and her shoulders were killing her. “You saved a room for me?” She was in awe of how sweet he was.

But Naruto just shrugged and looked away. Sakura saw the way his cheeks reddened though. “It’s not a big deal. We just didn’t bother looking for another guy. I had a feeling things wouldn’t work out at Karin’s when Shikamaru basically stopped coming home all of first week…”

Sakura still tackled him into a hug, forcing him to drop her bags. She pulled away and smiled. “You are literally the best, did you know that?”

He grinned back. “Obviously.” But a thought came to mind and his smile waned. “Um… there’s just one thing…”

“Yeah?” Sakura was too busy marvelling at the fact that her new room came with walls (and a bed and drawers and a closet and even a calendar) to notice his frown. “Don’t worry about rent. I got my job at the registrar’s office again so I’m good.”

“It’s not that.”

Sakura finally looked at him. “What is it?” She suddenly looked equally as frantic. “Oh.”

“Are you okay with living with your ex?”

“Obvously.”

“Really?”

“No.”

“I figured.”

“Meh.” Sakura shrugged. She took her bag from Naruto and opened it up to beginning the process of moving in all over again. “I’m kind of homeless, so I’ll make due. And you know how I am during school. I basically just live at campus during the year.”

Naruto laughed and ruffled her hair. “Don’t worry,” he told her, “we just have one more year of this crap, right?”

Sakura glanced at the calendar and nodded.

“Just one more year.”

OCTOBERi need reference letters

So it was October.

October came to mean a lot of things to Naruto: midterms, essays, Thanksgiving a.k.a. Turkey Day, pumpkin spice everything, breaking out the awesome orange scarf Sakura knitted for him years ago, pretty leaves, and so much more.

Now the boys didn’t usually maintain their house unless someone was coming to visit. Fine, the tiny front lawn would see a mowing every other week or so, and the backyard was only managed if there was going to be a party. And then the inside was divided that every man would take care of his own place, the kitchen would always be cleaned by whoever made whatever mess, and the bathroom would go through a weekly cycle of sorts. But things like the broom and the vacuum were only broken out for special occasions.

“Guys!”

In the living room, Sakura was sketching silly outfits on the bare bodies in her anatomy textbook in lieu of studying, while Naruto made his own efforts to procrastinate pretty obvious as he made a tower of all the novels and plays and poetry anthologies he had to read for the semester. So far, his stack was balancing at a rather noteworthy twenty-two. Shikamaru, on the other hand, was making paper balls with his notes and throwing them at Naruto’s tower.

They all looked up at Suigetsu’s frantic shout.

“What is it?” Sakura asked. She had the grace to look annoyed by the interruption to her ‘hard work.’

“Sasuke’s mom is here!”

Immediately, Naruto and Shikamaru rose, their eyes wide and their arms near flailing. Sakura raised an eyebrow when Naruto shrieked. His book tower had fallen over when he stood up so fast.

“Clean that up!” Suigetsu yelled, pointing.

Naruto anxiously did so by pushing all of the books under the couch. At the same time, Shikamaru was taking all the randomly strewn about mugs and plates and – oh god – beer bottles and hiding them in the video game drawer. Suigetsu was keeping a careful eye on the driveway from the window by the stairs.

Sakura could only frown. “What are you guys doing?”

“Sasuke’s mom is here,” Shikamaru pointed out.

Sakura looked at the boys like they were idiots and, for the most part, they returned the look. Suigetsu finally sighed. “Sakura, have you ever seen Sasuke’s mom?”

“Yes,” she said. “In fact, I—”

Naruto shushed her. “Sakura, haven’t you heard? Sasuke’s mom has got it going on!”

Sakura did not look amused, but that didn’t stop Naruto and the other boys from opening the door and yelling their hellos. They all ignored Sasuke’s knowing glare as they took his bags from him and all warmly greeted the lovely Mikoto Uchiha. They exchanged pleasantries and thanked Mikoto wholeheartedly when she graced them with a whole turkey for the house – her little Thanksgiving present to them.

“Oh, Mrs. Uchiha, you didn’t have to do that,” Suigetsu told her sweetly.

But the older woman just smiled and waved the matter off. “Oh, but you boys need to be properly fed!”

Sakura could only pray she had that kind of decency when she was older and sending her son off to live with his fellow cavemen. Sakura eyed Mikoto Uchiha’s beautiful cashmere sweater and her form fitting skirt and could actually kind of understand why her friends were all salivating like dogs. She suddenly felt incredibly insecure in her yoga pants and the sweater she ninety percent belonged to Shikamaru. God, she was such a mess, Sakura realized. At least she wasn’t wearing her UGGs…

Dammit.

“Sakura Haruno, is that you!”

Sakura blinked. “Huh?”

Finally, the boys got out of the way and Mikoto rushed over and hugged her. “Oh, darling!” Mikoto let go enough to look Sakura over and frown disapprovingly. “You’ve lost weight!” she pointed out gravely. “Why haven’t you been eating, missy? This better not be over some stupid boy, because let me tell you—”

Sakura flushed. “Nope!” she interrupted. “I just…” Sakura laughed awkwardly and took a step away from Mikoto. “I just, um, have been busy and haven’t really been sleeping properly…”

Mikoto immediately turned around to face the boys. “And why haven’t you all been making sure Sakura is eating correctly? Hm? Shikamaru? You’re the responsible one!”

Shikamaru froze for a moment with the attention on him. “Um.” He chuckled. “Well, I haven’t really been around either, Mrs. Uchiha. But I’ll definitely make sure our little Sakura eats three square meals a day.”

“Yes, you better!” Mikoto took her turkey out of Naruto’s hands and deposited it into Sakura’s despite the blond’s protests. She winked at Sakura. “Eat up, sweetie.”

Sakura smiled. “Thank you.”

Mikoto gave her son one last kiss on the cheek before saying her goodbyes to everyone. When she was finally gone, Naruto let out a low whistle and made some flattering but inappropriate comment that led to Sasuke punching him in the stomach and stomping away. Still wincing, Naruto hurriedly stole the turkey away from Sakura and brought it to the kitchen.

That was one last thing October meant to Naruto: Mikoto Uchiha sending over a whole turkey for their little house of broke students.

But the gesture of turkey-giving didn’t arouse the same happy feelings in Sakura. As Suigetsu thoughtfully took a bag of Sasuke’s on his way upstairs, Shikamaru volunteered to walk Mikoto to her car, and Naruto took the turkey for some “alone time,” Sakura went back to her anatomy textbook and suddenly felt incredibly lonely.

Sakura had spent Thanksgiving dinner with the Uchiha family once, back when she and Sasuke were still together. She got along with them all to the point that Mikoto would literally text Sakura at least every other day just to make sure she was okay or to talk. Ino thought that was weird, but Sakura justified things with that Ino had never been in a real relationship – not one that included bonding with your partner’s parent. And when Sasuke dumped Sakura, Mikoto immediately asked Sakura if she was okay. But Sakura soon began to distance herself from the woman, mostly out of propriety, and seeing her in person today made her feel horrible.

Sighing, Sakura picked up her mug of sangria and whined when she realized it was empty. She grudgingly went to the kitchen and took the bottle out of the fridge. After a moment of consideration, she decided to learn from past mistakes and drink from the bottle and skip the mug.

“Well done,” she told herself after a sip.

“Sakura, it’s ten in the morning.”

She joked and spun around. Sasuke was leaning against the counter with a cup of tea and judgemental frown.

“Um.” Sakura lowered the bottle and reconsidered her mug. “Hey.”

“Hi.”

He then took an economics textbook out of his backpack and went over to the couch, sitting beside her scrawled dresses and flower hats. She cringed, but he didn’t seem to notice her doodles. Sakura slowly made her way back to her book and sat as close to the edge as she could, at this point gulping down the sangria.

Seriously? Sakura thought. That was how he wanted to go about things? He wanted to ignore what happened three weeks ago that essentially set the shroud of awkward that hung over them whenever they saw each other in the kitchen or the hall or the living room?! What the actual fu—

Ugh.

When the silence became too much for her to concentrate in, she turned to Sasuke and found him already looking at her.

“How was your break?” she asked. Granted, KU didn’t really offer a “break” so much as one single day.

“Good.”

“What did you do?”

“Helped my mom cook,” Sasuke said.

Sakura grinned. “Since when do you cook?”

“Excuse you, but if I recall correctly, I’m not the one who set off the smoke alarm from boiling water.” Her eyes widened and he smirked.

“THAT WAS ONE TIME!” Still blushing, she kicked him, but he only grabbed her ankle to steady her. “Hmph. Well, what did you cook?”

“Mashed potatoes.”

Sakura raised an eyebrow. “Oh, and that’s just such a feat. Look at you Top Chef Wonder.” She giggled at her own not particularly funny joke and told herself it was way too early in the day to already be tipsy. But from what she could remember, Sasuke actually was a great cook. “Is that all you made?” she continued.

“I made a pie, too, actually,” he said. Then he pushed her leg off his lap and went back to the kitchen. The bounce of her foot on the cushion was what made her realize the Sasuke had actually been drawing nonsensical things on her calf andandand—

No. No, she told herself. This. Is not. Allowed.

Finally, he came back with a Tupperware and a fork, handing them to her.

“What is this?” she asked, drawing her legs in and sitting up straight.

“Pie.”

“Huh?”

“Pie,” he repeated. “I made pumpkin pie. It’s Itachi’s favourite and I remembered that it’s yours too so I brought a slice back for you.” Sasuke shrugged and all but buried himself in his economics textbook.

Sakura smiled at the gesture. “Thank you,” she mumbled, poking at the pie.

He glanced at her but saw her focused on the dessert. “You’re welcome,” he replied into his book.

And after finishing the slice, Sakura picked up her own book. The two sat on the couch for a few hours simply reading in a comfortable silence.

October also came to mean sucking up. October meant heading over to office hours (even the ones that started at 9AM) and making an impression and getting on your professor’s good side so that at the end of the semester, when they were determining Naruto’s participation grade, they would remember his bright hair and bright clothes at each and every lecture.

But this year, their final year, meant going to office hours would no longer just be about proposing separate essay topics or clarifying anything said in class.

This year meant reference letters.

Reference letters for grad school.

But those also meant office hours, which, with Naruto’s luck, meant 9AM with Dr. Kakashi Hatake – which actually kind of sort of meant 10AM considering the man was always late…

Still, that was early considering said hours were on a Friday.

“Let’s move, lazyass!”

“But I’m tired,” Naruto whined, lagging behind Sakura. “Can’t we just be death eaters?”

“No!”

“Or we can just be homeless,” he pointed out. They were on their way to the Humanities Building where Sakura was going solely as Naruto’s moral support while he asked for letters of recommendation. Naruto Uzumaki was going to graduate school, but… well, he was sort of too much of a wimp to approach his favourite professors alone. Likewise, Naruto may or may not have treated her to slash bribed her with a delicious lemon poppy seed muffin and chai tea latte for breakfast.

“I have worked too hard all these years to be homeless,” Sakura said between sips of her drink.

“Fine, not homeless, per se.” Nevertheless, Naruto continued along to the Humanities Building. He stopped the oblivious Sakura from walking into the doors, knowing that for whatever annoying reason, the automatic doors weren’t so automatic. He knew. He may or may not have walked into said doors before…

“Oh?”

“We can live in a box,” Naruto told her with a wink.

She rolled her eyes. “Just ask for your letters, Naruto.”

“I don’t know what to say!” But they were already in the elevator.

“You say ‘Hey, Kakashi, I really want to come back to KU for another year to do more readings and write more papers and lead more seminars yada yada yada.’ He’ll love it.” The sad thing was that Sakura wasn’t joking. She’d had Dr. Hatake in her first-year “Literature for our Time” course with Naruto and from her own visits and talks with the man, she’d come to know what he was like.

And well… Naruto looked like he was considering.

“Do you honestly think that would work?”

“I have full faith.”

She genuinely did.

Sakura herself had been going with the more formal approach of: “Dr. Whatever, would you be willing to write me a positive letter recommendation for X Med School?” Most of her professors were very familiar with her and her study habits and her amazing work, so Sakura didn’t actually need to put the operative “positive” in her requests, but it didn’t hurt to stay safe.

But with a professor like Kakashi, things would work out fine for Naruto.

They stood outside of Kakashi’s office and Sakura gave Naruto a pat on the back. “Do you have any idea what you’d want to research though?”

Naruto nodded. “Gothic literature!” he told her eagerly, looking ready to actually tell her more. “I’d like to look at the late eighteenth century and then maybe at the revival of Gothic literature in contemporary times. I mean, Gothic work is just so prevalent nowadays and—”

“Don’t tell me this stuff,” Sakura interrupted. She pointed to Kakashi’s open door. “Tell him!”

“Oh, right…” Naruto laughed awkwardly. “Okay. I can do this.”

“You can do this.”

“I can!”

“You can!”

“…I CAN’T.”

Fed up, Sakura pushed him into Kakashi’s office.

“Okay, so that went better than expected.”

Sakura rolled her eyes. “I told you.”

“Yeah, I know…” Naruto shrugged. “The entire asking-thing is just… nerve-wracking, I suppose.”

The two were at one of their favourite off campus haunts that served Sakura’s favourite sangria and made some of the greatest ramen Naruto had ever tasted. Sure, it was only noon, but it was never to early for wine and whining – at least, that was Sakura’s philosophy. And well, it had served her well for the past three years so…

Besides, it was Friday. Why not get nice and day drunk?

“So what schools are you applying to?” she asked Naruto.

“KU, of course,” Naruto listed through a grimace. “But… I don’t think I’ll get in. KU is so evil, Sakura-chan!”

She nodded. “Oh, I know.” While completing an undergraduate degree at KU was a magical feat in their humble opinions, to complete one and be accepted into the university’s graduate programs would be hard considering the CGPAs most KU students usually escaped with. While Sakura knew she wouldn’t have any problems, she did know that Naruto might. “Where else?”

“Not sure.”

Sakura raised an eyebrow. “What? Naruto, don’t just apply to one grad school if you’re set on doing your Master’s!”

“You don’t think I can get in?”

Sakura sighed. “It’s not like that,” she said, “it’s just that these are competitive programs. You should at least apply to more than one. I mean, what would you do if you didn’t get into KU?”

“…become a death eater?”

“You are so—so—” She sighed again and finished off her sangria. She poured another glass and sipped on that. “You’re like Ino.”

“What? I don’t like Ino!”

“Huh?” Sakura laughed. “No, I said you’re like her, not that you like her. That’d be weird.” In her semi-drunken state that was starting to become Sakura’s default state, she missed the red on Naruto’s cheeks.

“Well, how is Ino, anyway? I haven’t seen we had that kegger in September.” Both of them cringed, remembering their own personal awkward mistakes from that night. Naruto made a face. “Yeah. Ino.”

But Sakura snorted. “Who’s Ino? Oh! Did you mean Ino, the girl who’s apparently my bestie?” Sakura looked a little bit bitter. Maybe she was. Maybe she’s been in dire need of a girlfriend for the past two months but Ino hasn’t really been that great of a friend. “Yeah, she’s studying. She basically won’t have any human contact aside from lectures until she takes her LSATs in December.”

“I see.” Naruto noticed the sad look on Sakura’s face and wasn’t sure if she wanted a serious attempt at comfort or some kind of joke. “Well…” Naruto shrugged. “At least she has plans?”

“Yeah,” Sakura said with a nod. “I guess I just miss her.”

“What law schools will she apply to?”

“I DON’T EVEN KNOW THAT!” Sakura yelled. Her face crumpled and she took a long swig of her drink. “I miss her, Naruto. I know I’m being irrational and that my period is probably coming—”

“Thank you.”

“—but I mean it’s like she just doesn’t care about anyone right now!” Sakura refilled her glass and finished that in one go. Naruto subtly ordered another pitcher and Sakura continued: “I mean, I’m not trying to be clingy. I get it. She has stuff to do. But like, I’m living with Sasuke! HOW HAS SHE NOT EVEN ASKED ME IF THAT IS REMOTELY OKAY?!”

“Huh?” Naruto blinked. “I thought you said that you were okay with that… Sort of.”

“I am!”

“What?” God. Why were women so confusing?!

“I don’t care about Sasuke, Naruto!” Sakura looked at him like he was the one acting crazy. “What I’m saying is that Ino—my Ino—would have texted me the first night asking if I reacquainted myself with Sasuke, followed by an unnecessary amount of wink-faces! Current Ino responds to my text messages days late and never wants to hang out. Like I’m not even allowed to go to the library with her because she thinks I’ll distract her!”

“…you kind of are a huge distraction.” Which she was. As surprising as it was, Sakura was actually the one between the two of them that could be found not working (but still, unfairly enough, maintaining a 4.0 CGPA, so like what the hell).

“NOT THE POINT.”

Their next pitcher arrived and Sakura’s face lit up. “I’m just sad, I guess,” she admitted forlornly. “Or tired. A bit of both.” She sighed and suddenly looked a bit bashful. “I’m sorry. I’ve been ranting all this time. How are you and Sasuke doing?”

Naruto levelled her with a flat stare. “You make us sound like a couple.”

“Aren’t you?”

“SAKURA-CHAN!”

She giggled and Naruto let her. Mocking his “bromance” with Sasuke was always something that could make Sakura smile so he let it go. But suddenly the smile fell and she adopted a serious look. A bad serious look.

“Hey!” she yelled, grabbing his hand on the table. “Are you single?”

Naruto felt very, very uncomfortable with her hand on his. “What?”

“I have this friend,” she clarified. “She’s seen you in a lot of my photos and has probably stalked you on every possible social network. She thinks you’re really good-looking. She’s a super sweet girl and I think the two of you would hit it off really well.”

“Are you…” The words felt weird coming out of his mouth. “Are you trying to set me up?”

“No. Maybe. Yes.”

“What?” Naruto laughed at the mere idea. “What’s her name?”

“Hinata Hyuuga. Really smart, really sweet, really pretty. You’d like her.” Sakura pulled out her phone and logged into her Facebook to find the girl’s profile. She was about to show Naruto a picture but he covered the phone and placed it face-down on the table. “What?”

“I trust your judgement.”

Sakura blinked, utterly astonished. “So… you’ll go on a date with her?”

Musing over all the nothing that had been going on his life as of late, Naruto nodded. “Yeah, I’ll go on a date with her.”

NOVEMBERi need to go to sleep

November was the worst. November was when you got back your midterms or assignments, cried, rechecked said midterms or assignments, cried again, and then drowned your sorrows in your alcoholic beverage of choice.

For Naruto that was beer.

And as Naruto whined over the grade he got on the paper he wrote the morning it was due, Sakura rubbed his back with one hand and scrolled through the Recently Added section of Netflix.

“It could be worse,” Sakura said.

“How could it have been worse?” Naruto asked her, his eyes still trained on the bolded 72 at the bottom of the page.

“Naruto, a 72 by KU standards is actually pretty damn good!”

“Oh, shut up Miss 4.0. Leave me alone. Leave me to wallow in my sorrow and beer. There is nothing left for me. Alas, woe is me!”

Sasuke, on the other hand, wasn’t nearly as comforting. “Listen, dumbass. You passed. Passing is good, remember? You’re fine.”

“PASSING ISN’T ENOUGH FOR GRAD SCHOOL, SASUKE.”

He sat down beside Sakura, leaving her between the two boys. He handed her a mug of sangria and passed a brand new beer over to Naruto, letting him drink it between awkward whining noises that mimicked some sort of dying animal. Sakura looked ready to say some more words of consolation but Sasuke shook his head, signalling for her to stop. “Leave him be,” Sasuke said. “He’s always like this when he gets back a grade.”

“I know but…” Sakura glanced at Naruto. “He looks so pitiful.”

“I AM LITERALLY RIGHT BESIDE YOU, SAKURA-CHAN.” Naruto sat up straight, letting the blanket he’d wrapped himself in fall back a little. He stole the remote away from her and began to look through the files of movies and shows from Suigetsu’s hard drive that they had connected to the television. “My life is over.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes. “Your life isn’t over.”

“It is.”

“You’re being an idiot.”

“Listen, Princess,” Naruto hissed, now glaring at Sasuke. “Not all of us have names that all but grant entry into programs and internships and all those other pretty things.”

Sasuke took offence to that. “I still need to maintain a good GPA to get in, Naruto. My name isn’t everything.”

Naruto didn’t seem to have any proper response to go with that so he simply stood up, tightened his burrito of a blanket, and waddled away. He came back a few seconds later to grab his beer, but still gave Sasuke and Sakura one last look of contempt before leaving.

“Such a baby,” Sakura mumbled when he was gone.

---

ALRIGHT AND THAT IS WHERE IT ENDED. i did find this though. i assume it was supposed to be part of the november chapter, which i never finished:

“Oh,” she said, understanding his look of awkwardness. She rolled her eyes. “No, this isn’t a gift with some meaning behind it, Sasuke. I mean, you made me pie, remember? It’s not like it had some implied Sakura-you-goddess-please-take-my-unworthy-self-back between the bites, right?” When he failed to reply, Sakura only frowned before shrugging the matter off. “The point is, this is a gift for you from me, Sakura the Friend.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Friend?”

She nodded. “Well we are friends, aren’t we?” She preferred ‘friends’ to ‘two people stuck being around each other despite lingering awkwardness simply because they had way too many mutual friends.’ “Sasuke?”

“Yeah,” he eventually replied. “We’re friends.”

Sakura grinned and patted the tablet. “Then accept my gift, friend.” She winked, emphasizing the word weirdly.

“Okay, don’t ever do that again.”

and then this the outline:

December: i need to study

Go sledding at the university

Have a snowball fight on the field

Everyone goes out to celebrate after Ino’s LSAT and get unbelievably drunk

Sasuke and Sakura have gotten back together, which Naruto knows but doesn’t call them on

Goes to his house for Christmas because her parents are travelling

Ino and Naruto hang out

NYE party at the house

Ends with Sakura checking her KU email and realizing there is a problem with her potential graduation

January: i need another vacation

Sakura ends up being in a Jane Austen course with Naruto because she was told she needed a humanities credit

February: i need to fix my habits

Go on a road trip for Reading Week

Come home Sunday night and scramble

March: i just need to graduate

Naruto and Sakura discuss their Big Boy/Girl jobs and the likeliness of them

Naruto reveals that he’s seriously dating Ino

Sakura is happy for him and tells him about Sasuke

“I know. It’s not hard to tell. Why do you think rent isn’t so bad in that house? The walls are paper thin, you bitch.”

Dread paying back student loans

Sakura tells him she’s nervous because Sasuke is studying abroad next year whereas Sakura’s dream school is KU’s med school – will they break up again

Doesn’t tell him she plans to backpack for the year

“Do you realize this is like… the last time?”

April: i need to get in

Acceptance letters

May: i need my damn grades

Go on another road trip to unwind

June: i need to go back

Convocation

and i found this, which i think is meant to be in the january chapter:

“There is something very, very wrong with a situation if you are taking a class to bum notes off of Naruto.”

Sakura merely laughed as she spread out some sheets of paper and pretended to read them. She still had another two hours of work and she wasn’t particularly inclined to, well, work, and Tenten—the girl she shared the front desk with—didn’t really care whether she did anything or not.

“I know that sounded really bad,” Sakura said, “but I just need a Humanities credit.”

“Still!” Tenten urged, not even looking away from her computer screen. “Naruto.”

“He’s not as dumb as everyone thinks he is, you know.”

Tenten considered this before shrugging. “I suppose. He has been at KU for the past four years and is even graduating on time.”

“Exactly.” Sakura moved onto the mug of pens on her desk, testing each one to see which still had ink. “And he’s actually really good at Lit courses.”

“He should be,” Tenten replied with a snort. “I mean, that is what he’s specializing in.” Her chair squeaked when she leaned back and pushed away from her desk to roll over near Sakura. Their desk was L-shaped with each of them on one side. “What course is it again?” she asked. But being the fidgety person that she was, Tenten moved to put away some student files. She climbed onto the stool and alphabetizing. “It was something cheesy.”

“Austen and Her Contemporaries.” Sakura hadn’t gotten past her first word before Tenten burst out into giggles. She couldn’t help but smirk when another thought came to mind. “Want to know something even better?”

Tenten gave Sakura her full attention. “Um, obviously.”

“Sasuke’s taking it with us too.”

oh man.

thank you for asking about this fic because i had absolutely no recollection of it but as i read all these docs, i realized how trashy i was in undergrad. and how frightened i was of graduating! just reading this makes me remember how afraid of growing up i used to be -- of not being a student and having to get a job and running out of time. but man i’ve been so much happier since then. the fear of “running out of time” is always around but i also have lost the will to care about people and/or things as the years have gone by.

ok sorry that totally wasn’t your question lmao. I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE ROLLERCOASTER OF THAT OUTLINE.

how did it end? well, everyone graduated. presumably everyone got into the post-grad programs of their dreams (although funding??). the naruto arc was totally based on me in my 4th year and his plans are NOT where my future went lmao. although to be clear, future him is definitely satisfied with where his life took him. ss and ni double dated happily ever after. maybe. probably.

#Anonymous

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sheinthatfandom · 5 years ago

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Hey I don’t wanna be a bother but I sent you a message before and you didn’t respond. Usually do pretty quickly so I just wanted to make sure you and Beanie were okay.

I’m sorry nonnie I HAVENT gotten any messages. Can you send it again? Or feel free to hit me up in chat I can’t promise I’ll always be on but I can promise to respond when I can.

That said things haven’t been ehh. Beanie came down sick again, but I’ve gotten the green light from my ObGYN to try for a second baby once I drop some weight so I will hopefully not be high risk again. My phone is acting up with typing capitalizing shit and putting words I didn’t type so yay. Hubby’s bday just passed and I gifted him an amazing commission piece from @lamthetwickster but it has my daughter’s face so I won’t be putting it on tumblr. But it’s a painting of her with her two grandparents (hubby’s rents) who both passed away before her birth. That was pretty emotional. His aunt just died yesterday after a long painful fight with cancer. Fuck cancer seriously. I’ve finally got ties with the abusive family I was raised with and lowered contact with a lot of people who just weren’t bringing any joy or positivity to my life. And while I’m still struggling to finish the next chapter of my dark bingo I have a dysfunctional thanksgiving family fic with the Winchester’s that has @thinkwritexpress-official going wtf who did this in real life? And I’m like this is why I’m titling it working through shit so if you want a dysfunctional Mary John Kate etc it’s coming and will hopefully be done before thanksgiving for anyone going through shit you can laugh at my pain and misfortune played out by dean Cas sam and Adam. Oh also spectrum did some Jedi mind bullshit on hubby and fucked us over but claimed they saved us a whopping 2dollars off our bill (for the next 12 months only then it’s going up) I know this is a lot and you didn’t ask all this but I’ve gotten enough questions of what’s going on? Am I okay? What’s new? Where’s the next fic? And stuff that I figured best to have it all be somewhere. Oh wait one more good thing apparently my daughter’s pediatrician is a family general doctor and I might be able to drop my sexist asshole doc and start going to her instead so yay.

#anonymous #loren gets mail #personal #word vomit

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bgharison · 5 years ago

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Which WIP?!

I have about three weeks between classes, my meds and my muse seem to be holding a tentative truce, and I really miss writing. Wanna help me decide which rabbit hole? I need to choose one and kind of stick with it. My goal is to have a rough draft done by August 19 and then edit during the semester. (My goal is to start an original work in January 2020, so this is warm-up.)

I do find feedback and enthusiasm both validating and motivating, so if something makes you go “oooooooh” let me know?

Options below:

Option A: Vaguely Pacific Northwest McDanno AU -- Steve returns from combat to his deceased father’s cabin, Danny is a journalist writing about missing children in the area. Danny gets too close to the truth. I only have three paragraphs of this written, but it’s outlined. Inspired in part by the idea of a bearded Steve and Danny wearing jeans, boots, and scarves.

(opening) He moved through the house, flicking on one or two lights, somewhat surprised that the electricity hadn’t been long since disconnected. Since it wasn’t, the well pump still worked and the kitchen sink yielded fresh, cold water. The aquifers here, in the northwest corner of the country, have the coldest, clearest water of anyplace he’s seen, on this continent or any other. He cupped a handful of it and gulped greedily. Even in the dim light, he could tell that the coffee maker had only a faint layer of dust. It gave him pause, to think that someone had been keeping up the property. His father must have arranged for a caretaker in his will.

It didn’t occur to him to test the heat; he simply took off his boots and climbed, fully clothed, under the heavy comforter in the room that has remained unchanged since he left it almost two decades ago.

(random selection)

“Go away, Danny,” Steve orders. “I mean it. Get the hell away from me.”

Danny wipes at the blood, dripping steadily now from his eyebrow, trailing down the side of his face. His jaw clenches as he squares off against Steve. “Why? Because I caught you off guard, didn’t duck fast enough? Come on, Steve, I know you didn’t mean --”

“That’s the point, Danny!” Steve explodes. “That’s the fucking point. Whether I mean it or not, this is what happens. People get hurt. The people I care about get hurt.”

“Yeah, is that so? Well maybe the people I care about get something, too.”

“What? What, Danny?”

Danny steps into his space and he can feel his own coiled tension reflected right back at him, in the stubborn set of Danny’s shoulders, in the heat radiating off his chest.

“This.”

Steve doesn’t have time to react before Danny’s hands are on him, wrapping around the back of his neck, his hip, pulling him in and down. He tastes the tang of copper and iron as their lips crash together and for a moment it’s violent, and Steve falls into it. Violence is familiar.

Option B: Core Four AU Steve comes back from being presumed dead after the Hesse fiasco in North Korea and opens an acupuncture clinic. Danny is building a new life on the island after losing his wife. Steve starts to fall for Danny until he suspects that Danny is keeping a secret involving his little girl. Kono is exasperated with all of the alphabet agencies that come into play -- CIA, FBI, ATF, and she just wants to know -- WTF?! Outlined but with two possible “reveals” I would need to choose from. This one also give me an opportunity to play with world-building, because the setting is specific, involving an elaborate tree house, a zip line, and other things that end up getting SEALed in order to protect Grace.

(There’s this)

“Kono, we are professional health care providers here,” he said. “No dating clients. And quit trying to set me up.”

“I’m asking for myself,” Kono said. She beamed at him, a flash of white teeth and dimples. “He’s adorable. Like a . . . like a fluffy little lion cub. I want to take him home and just --”

“Okay then, Kono, let’s get --” Steve glanced down at his schedule -- “Mr. Wilson into a treatment room.”

“Can I get him to put on a gown?” Kono asked.

Steve looked at her sternly as she blinked in mock innocence.

(And this)

Then again, Danny wasn’t most people. He noticed everything. Too many years of training and practice to stop now -- besides, the stakes had never been higher, and his powers of observation, of reading people, of seeing through disguises and lies, might just be the edge that would keep him and his daughter alive until this mess was over.

He pulled off the road onto the narrow gravel drive leading back to the beleaguered property that was not only his cover, but his home -- his fortress. He pulled up to the gate and keyed in one of two codes -- the one that verified that all was well, and that he was not under duress. The gate opened smoothly, its deliberately aged and tenuous appearance belying that it was part of the newly installed state-of-the-art defense.

The drive was long, curving around dense areas of vegetation that still hinted at previous deliberate planning and careful attention. With a bit of work, the grounds would once again be functional and attractive. His Camaro handled the gentle incline with ease, and soon he was pulling into the ground level garage of his home, opening the garage door with another code. It slid closed behind him, the motion sensors glowing at each other in the dim light. A third code was entered at the door between the garage and the house, the heavy deadbolt sliding open. Danny locked the door behind him and reset the alarm.

“You realize that three sets of coded entry is going to be difficult to explain to visitors,” a calm voice said. The clink of glass on porcelain in the kitchen, along with the scent of rich Kona coffee, was welcome.

(And this)

Steve took the long way home, the windows of his truck rolled down, filling the cab with fresh, fragrant air. He knew he would never tire of this, never tire of being back home, back on Oahu. Pulling into the driveway was something that at one point, he was sure he’d never do again -- he’d never take it for granted. The house itself felt in turn far too empty and far too full of ghosts, but he couldn’t imagine not living here. He was making peace with both the solitude and the presences he couldn’t quite shake. When Mary was well enough to be discharged, he would bring her here, where he could watch over her, protect her the way a brother should, care for her like she needed. He’d drag her out into the sunshine and fresh air. It would help. It had to.

He keyed in the alarm code and slipped inside the still house. Ignoring the boxes half-packed in his father’s office, gathering dust, he headed for the kitchen.

Option C: A case from Danny’s past comes back to haunt the team and threaten the island. This one is not really outlined. Possibly gen/case fic, possibly newly McDanno, potentially an OC interest for Steve when the original profiler, who considers this case her one failure, comes to help (because I love playing with OCs and creating better love interests for him than the show manages to do, and I loved the dynamic with Steve and Alicia Brown, and even though I didn’t see it as romantic, I think Steve could fall for someone who is a match for him intellectually and who would understand what his years in the underbelly of Naval intel did to his psyche, and I love the ‘brilliant, mentally tough but physically vulnerable person matched with the brilliant, physically tough but emotionally vulnerable person” trope, sue me). And I love exploring Danny’s back stories and volatility and the reasons that his marriage failed because his job came first. We would see a darker Danny in this and that intrigues me. I might also jump the timeline for the first time (for me) put this post season-4, meaning Junior and Tani instead of Chin and Kono.

There’s this:

“We called him the Holiday Weekend Killer,” Danny said. “First body, just like this one, the Tuesday after President’s Day weekend. We found the next body the day after Easter. And then another the Tuesday after Memorial Day. And then we ran ourselves into the ground all through the heat of the summer, got nowhere, and the fourth body showed up the day after Labor Day. We missed Thanksgiving with our families with nothing to show for it but another dead woman -- this one we had to identify with dental records, because the son of a bitch had four days to torture her. We took off twenty-four hours, Christmas Eve into Christmas Day, might as well, since we had no fucking leads. He had almost a month with that poor girl, college student, aged out of the foster system, so no one fucking noticed she was missing until classes started again in January. Christmas Day, no one even fucking knew that beautiful --”

Danny broke off with a muttered curse and walked out of the room, pushing the doors open with such force that they struck the walls behind, the sound echoing as Steve and Max stood in shocked silence.

“Give us a few, yeah, Max?” Steve said quietly.

He caught up with Danny in the basement locker room, the soles of his shoes sticking out of the stall where he was retching over the toilet. Steve grabbed a length of paper toweling and wet it at the sink.

Danny staggered out of the stall and silently accepted Steve’s offering, wiping his face and mouth. He balled up the toweling and dropped it into the wastebasket, then rinsed his mouth at the sink, hands trembling on the faucet.

Steve waited, arms crossed, leaning against the door of the locker room.

“I’m sorry, Danny,” he said, when Danny finally turned off the water, leaning over the sink, his breath coming in ragged gasps. “We’ll all understand if you need to sit this one out.”

It happened so fast that Steve flinched in surprise, Danny’s hand lashing out and shattering the mirror in front of him.

“Sit it out? Why bother? This fucking animal already destroyed my marriage, almost cost me my baby girl, not to mention the pile of pretty young corpses we processed. Processed lots of bodies, Steve, but precious little evidence. I’ll have them FedEx it to us, shouldn’t take much to send one fucking file box full of nothing useful,” Danny exploded. “Sit this one out? What, just do paperwork while I watch you and Chin run yourselves into the ground, while we all try to pretend that we aren’t worried sick about the possibility of this guy getting his hands on Kono? While Max stacks up bodies in the morgue? Bodies that no one claims? Because this guy, this guy, Steve, he knows how to pick his victims.”

“Danny,” Steve sighed. He rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. “Danny, we have -- we have resources here, we can cut through red tape. If it is the guy --”

“Cigarette burns on the soles of their feet, Steve, do you have any idea --”

Danny stopped short at the flicker of emotion that Steve couldn’t mask quickly enough. He met Steve’s gaze and held it.

“Yeah,” Steve said. “We’re going to get this guy, Danny. Now listen, the first thing we need to know -- is this personal? With him and you? Is he here, now, on Oahu, because you’re here?”

#bless you if you read this whole mess #beegie used to write #wip wonderland #some of these ideas are self indulgent and shallow #and i don't even care #this is supposed to be fun

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geneshaven · 6 years ago

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Arrow, Season 6 (Threads of Discord)

The following breakdown of Season 6 has been churning around in my addled brain since 623 ended two weeks ago, and today I felt compelled to bring it out into the light of day. I am not agreeing or disagreeing with anybody else’s take on the season. I’m only putting it down in black and white, because quite frankly, it’s a way for me to make sense of what was served up to us this season. I was left with some discombobulated thoughts and feelings when 623 was over, so much so that the next night I felt an immediate need to write a fic, (The Distance Between Two Hearts, *plug, plug*) to give everything a happy ending and to help it all go down smoother. So, here is my final take on the Season as a whole.

When Lian Yu blew up at the end of Season 5, the writers of Arrow left a few storylines up in the air; mainly, Oliver and Felicity and their momentum of getting back together. A lot of fans just assumed it was a done deal. They kissed. They hugged. They made a promise to one another that after the smoke cleared; they would talk about being in each other’s lives again. (I’ve thought recently that the visual of Lian Yu exploding into larger fireballs could be a great summation of Season 6.)

So, hiatus came upon us in the summer of 2017 and the writers tried to pull a fast one, leaving all our beloved characters fates up in the air via a lame cliffhanger. Oliver saved William from Chase’s clutches. Samantha was killed, giving life to one of the plot lines for Season 6. Thea was caught in the explosions, blasted into a coma; a colossal waste of her character and of Willa’s acting abilities. John was injured, setting up yet another ill-conceived plot line for Dig. The Newbies---well, they survived, but a lot of fans might have wished they were blown up. Quentin survived, only to be killed off after stringing him and us along with a lunatic fringe thing with Black Siren---another waste of a good character and actor. And Felicity? Of course she would survive. But how did she survive? A really great potential scene was wasted by the writers not having Oliver searching for and finding the love of his life safe and in need of a hug. She was last seen running for cover; then after five months of hiatus, she reappeared at the Bunker with food orders from Big Belly Burger for the guys. There was a brief scene with her and Oliver alone in the Bunker, with UST hovering over them like an image of the salmon ladder calling out to them. Instead, they danced around each other and gave us an ever briefer talk about William, how they had agreed to stay apart in order for the boy to adjust to his new life. “Not tonight, another night,” Felicity promised Oliver. Had that been going on for five months? Were cold showers to be the norm for them in the unforeseeable future?

It was not to be, and plot took the lead over character for the bulk of the season. As a result, the stories were paper thin and patience thin.

To be fair, not all the episodes were terrible. There were a handful that had glimmers of promise. 603 and Olicity finally coming back together with one big kiss was pretty okay. 604 is a front-runner for me, coming in as a favorite episode. It was a rare example of character over plot, which is why it worked so well. Having Oliver and Felicity switch places, (due to another plot driven story line of Oliver giving up being the Green Arrow and passing the torch on to John) with Felicity out in the field and Oliver taking up the Overwatch mantle---it was inspired writing. Yet, having John in the Green Arrow suit and leading the charge, as well as turning him into a drug addict; it was so out of tune, sending the fandom into a tail-spin. And the Newbies? Didn’t they get blown up?

So after 604, we got some filler episodes, giving the writers more time to strengthen their plots. Slade Wilson and his mission to save his son, and dragging Oliver along with him was not a good idea, story wise. I always liked Slade Wilson’s character; the good and the bad. But the writers missed another chance to send him out with a good and final story.

We got a very brief look at Oliver getting arrested in 607, on Thanksgiving no less. It would come back to haunt everybody in 623.

The Crossover. Nazi’s. Doppelgangers. Evil Oliver as the Fuhrer. Supergirl as Eva Braun. Felicity as a victimized Jew. Quentin as the Gestapo. The WestAllen wedding ceremony and the destruction it suffered. Whoever paid for the event probably felt the economic hurt more than the invasion. It would have been more believable than the racist crap MG and AK came up with.

Then at the end, it was a shout-out to Oliver telling Barry guys like them don’t get the girl. They were married to their loves, side by side in an impromptu ceremony. Okay, because I am an Olicity shipper, it was good to see them happy and all in with their love for one another. No rings, no wedding apparel and no vows. Just a beautiful fall day by a lake. It worked for some and was a travesty for others.

Olicity’s reception in 609 took some of the sting away from their unconceivable double wedding. We got a lot of pretty, (Oliver and Felicity dressing up) an ill-advised toast from Rene, (Rene, really? If I were John, I would have been pissed by that demotion) music and dancing, cake-cutting and bouquet-throwing---and god help us; the Hoffman’s.

So 610, to the end of the season, was nothing short of the worst writing to ever find its way onto the show. It was a flight of fancy and preference for Marc and Wendy. The whole civil war thing between OTA and NTA---how could they think that would be entertaining? And killing off Cayden James, who had the potential of being a good villain and replacing him with Ricardo Diaz---it was the writers shooting themselves in the foot and the fans in the back. Rene shooting at Felicity and taking an axe to Oliver, Curtis intentionally hurting John to get intel and Dinah just generally pissed at everyone---it was all a swirling, nauseating mess of WTF.

Then John and Oliver throwing each other around the Bunker like kids in a schoolyard? John brings out some pent-up resentments and disapprovals over Oliver’s leadership abilities. Really? It was just more piling on on Oliver to keep the plot going. Oliver is now a husband and a father, and maybe even a role model. He has earned all that makes his life full, through blood, sweat and tears. He has virtually erased the angry, violent juggernaut we all met in Season 1. He doesn’t deserve to be blamed for everyone else’s short-comings and issues. It was just backwards writing all around.

Diaz. One big yawn. A non-threatening blow-hard who’s only real menace was being a big whiner and killing you with annoyance. I’m still shaking my head that he is coming back for Season 7.

About Season 7. Marc, Wendy and a large part of their toxic writing staff are gone. A new showrunner (Beth) is in place, along with a new, mostly female writer’s room. Do we get more character and less plot? Can they do enough damage control to salvage the mess they inherited? I hope so. Will Diaz meet an early demise; say in the first act of 701? Will Oliver be released from prison by some lawyerly trickery? Will the Newbies get blown up? Okay, I didn’t want to push things too far.

Thea and Lance are gone (insert tears here.) But Roy is coming back, and there are rumors of an Olicity baby. The Big Bad? Well, a litter of kittens would be scarier than Dias. And cuter too.

Five months. Damn. Maybe I will rewatch Season 6, you know, to pass the time.

Just kidding. I’m not into self-torture.

@it-was-a-red-heeler @memcjo @almondblossomme @hope-for-olicity @wordslovedreams @olicityinmyheart @olicityotp-always @swordandarrow @cruzrogue @ruwithmeguys @gabriellamarie97 @bandanab310 @dmichellewrites @wanhani @1106angel

#season 6 #we all survived it #hiatus

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please-dont-hurt-me · 7 years ago

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Mchanzo rec

The cooking cowboy by SadakoTetsuwan (wip at 30 chapters right now, 77046 words, and has a mature rating)

“It had started simple—he just needed a good recipe for matcha cake to surprise Genji on his birthday, and so he’d started clicking around for tutorials on YouTube. But now Hanzo is in deep, and is officially part of ‘The Chuckwagon’; the mostly middle-aged, mostly female fan following of YouTube cooking sensation Jesse McCree, the Cooking Cowboy.How had his life come to this?“

I think I should make it obvious that I love this. I love that Mccree cooks and is so good at it, I love how Hanzo picks up a hobby. I especially love that mishaps happen because of a lawyer email. Genji is both a little shit and a good brother, like a realistic sibling. Hanzo’s anxiety feels kind of similar to my own in a sense. It’s got good and realistic pacing, having them learn of each other, making the interact, start to flirt, have them meet, have hesitations, meet eachother halfway, and follow through. The only thing I’m not particularily fond of was the Gency but it was minor and was mostly just side fluff which is all right by me.

One of my favorite parts of this fic is that it has a recipe at the end of each chapter

Hanzo, Denial is Not a River in Egypt by SadakoTetsuwan (complete with 1/1 chapters, 5787 words, and has an explicit rating )

“Jesse likes Hanzo.

He's glad that Hanzo likes him back.

There's only one problem.

Hanzo doesn't think he's gay.”

I remeber one day I was scrolling through the Mchanzo tag when I remebered that this fic existed, for two scenes only. “It’s not gay if the dicks dont touch” from Hanzo and the last bit with Hanzo yelling out the window. I remebered these two scenes and I started franticly scrolling through the pics for that one comic that has a link to this fanfic. Its a good fic but you will have your hands in your palms for most of with how ridicously in denial Hanzo is.

Just fyi, theres a lot of kinky shit so the explict tag is on there for a reason

A faithful companion by kaijuborn (complete with 1/1 chapters, 10195 words, and has a rating of teen-and-up)

“Hanzo is a wanderer, always on the move after leaving his home and his duties. However, when winter comes and he finds himself in an abandoned town, he decides to stay for a while. A large, three-legged wolf accompanies him, though the animal appears to be more than what first meets the eye.”

This fic is very beutiful. like the begging captures calmness and serenity, the second captures the feeling you have in a warm bed, late at night after drinking tea, and the final beat is the fluttery feeling of attraction and affection and it’s amazing.

Five Times Hanzo Shimada Lost His Composure by leoandlancer (complete with 6/6 chapters, 31856 words, and a Teen-and-up rating)

“When Hanzo first arrived at the Watchpoint, he wasn't expecting anything like Jesse McCree. Already shouldering the responsibility of pursuing his redemption, and trying to reconnect with Genji, Hanzo is determined to make his new arrangement a success. However, the gunslinger has an irritatingly thoughtless way of making Hanzo loose his composure. (Five Times + One fic of Hanzo increasingly loosing his cool over all the little things that come easily to McCree because help me I need more fluff.)”

Okay this is straight sugar and it’s great. Also in other news: Hanzo is super gay.

The 85th Annual King County Bake-Off by venvephe (wip that 4/5 chapters complete, 37995 words, and has a Mature rating)

“It’s October first, and it’s all come down to this.

The cake is perfect. He’s been waiting for this moment all year, since the previous baking competition. This is his chance at redemption, at reclaiming the crown of the best baker in the county. It’s a title only the winner of the county fair can hold. He’s waited a year and spent hours upon hours at work. Early mornings and late nights, scrapped ideas and tons of flour and sugar went into his masterpiece. It’s all led to him to standing here, awaiting the announcement of the winners.

This year, it’s going to be Hanzo. Last year’s winner - his rival, his nemesis - is going down. Hanzo’s not going to let his mortal enemy take the crown for a third year in a row.

What kind of name is Jesse McCree, anyways?”

Hanzo is a very bitter baker who is angry that a “soccer mom” beat him. Hot guy whose his type approaches him at the competions. Turns out “soccer mom” is the hot guy, he wins. Hanzo’s pride is seriously bruised and litterally broke the fucking eggs at the goddman supermarket.... hanzo wtf is wrong with you. I mean this is perfectly in character but god this is why i can relate to mccree more in social situations. He’s such a stubborn guy and this stupid prideful man makes so many mistakes aaaghhhh.

Willing to lie by Ilyen (wip with 6 chapters, 58434 words, and an explict rating)

"It's Thanksgiving. Want to skip that long, insulting conversation about how you're still single? About how your parents really want more grandchildren? Well, look no further!

I am a 28 year old felon with no high school degree and a dirty old van one year younger than me painted like Eddie Van Halen's guitar. I can play between the ages of 20 and 29 depending on if I shave. I'm a line cook and work late nights at a bar. If you'd like to have me as your strictly platonic date for Thanksgiving, but have me pretend to be in a very long or serious relationship with you, to torment your family, I'm game."

-Jesse McCree probably

A story 110% based on this craigslist ad - http://cdn.foodbeast.com/content/uploads/2014/11/craig.jpg

This is ridicouslous. It pulls no punches with its comedy and its tradgety. Its great in how despite being put in a fucking miserable situation because of the shimada’s, Mccree is still so sweet to them and I live for how all of them interact. I love how shimada family dinamic works (or doesnt) because it show how toxic their enviroment and how they cope in diffrent ways.

The Hunter and the Demon by WinterOcelot

This one is a series which is great and I’ve commented on each of the fics in that series. the lore is amazing and so is the relationships. its definately worth the read.

Here’s the summerary of the first fic:

“A violent creature has been murdering people in the small Japanese village of Hanamura. When nothing is done about it for a whole month, veteran monster hunter Jesse McCree decides it's time for a professional to be called in.What he happens to stumble across is far from what he was anticipating.“

but my favorite of the series’s summary is:

“Jesse gets a call about a vampire coven in Australia. He agrees to investigate, which means another lengthy flight for Hanzo the grumpy (but snuggly) demon.“

Sweet as Honey by Batkatbrown (wip with 12 chapters, 37516 words, and mature rating)

“Maybe.” Jesse’s voice rasped at the end, rising sharply. “But … um… if you did want… you know… a bed would be nice.” Jesse lowered his eyes to the ground, the slightest tremor running down his body. “Mabel’s asleep and your car’s just outside…”

Hanzo’s heart plummeted into his stomach, revulsion coiling into his throat like a living thing. “Jesse.” He paused to draw in a calming breath, fighting to control the beast inside. It raged in his eyes, and he curled his hand into a fist in Jesse’s shirt. The room felt too small, the air sucked away.

“When I take your mouth, you will be begging for it,” Hanzo’s voice growled in his throat. “Not a cheap offer to buy affection or kindness from me,” he drew Jesse down and tilted his mouth to his ear. “But because you can’t stand being parted from me for a single second more.”

It’s a beautiful fic full of realistic veiws of America; assholes, poverty, shitty care of vetrans, ptsd, and unfourte situations. Mccree is scrapping by and the cake he got for his sister’s birthday is smashed by an asshole and Hanzo swoops in and not only buys him a fancy birthday cake but multiple toys.

it seems like a sugar daddy au but it isnt. They might be attracted to each other but it is an exchange of sex for money.

Happiness is a Warm Puppy by murgamurg (complete with 2/2 chapters, 5170 words, and gen rating)

“Hanzo finds a ball of fur that waddles to him immediately.It is -- a puppy. He doesn't know what to do with a puppy.“

Its as pure and sweet as it sounds. Its amazing and theres 101/10 chemistry and I love how deep they are in pining. The last scene is amazing and 100000/10.

#mchanzo #mccree #jesse mccree #hanzo shimada #fics #fic rec #mchanzo fic

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