#TII au

[villetela]

Sometimes Sun can panic whenever he starts to "forget his memories" and when he finally processes things correctly he'll eventually come back to his self again

[villetela]

Oh.... My... GOSHHHHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

HELLO????? THIS WAS UNEXPECTED OH JEEZ 😳😳😳

I'M ADMIRING EVERYTHING ON THIS??? OH MYYYYY

AAAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH RUIIII ❤❤❤❤❤💖💖

THIS HAS MADE MY DAY!! THANK YOU AAAAAAAAA 💞💞💞💗💗 😭😭😭😭😭

YOUR WELCOME BTW- (honestly I don't mind people drawing my aus or ocs it's fine lol)

AAAAAAAAAAAA I'M SO SO NORMAL...

I love how you drew himmmmm I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOUR ART STYLE AND I'VE GOTTA LEARN HOW TO DO YOUR ART STYLE PLSSSS 😭😭😭😭😭😭💗💗💗

I also LOVED how you sort of changed his look (honestly this version is better tbh XD)

AAAAAAAAAAA

EATING THIS ARTTTTTTT *consumes it*

WOOOOO WERE EATING GOOD TODAY-/J

Me rn:

AAAAAA thank you so so so so much rui!! 😭😭💖💖 I appreciate this and will add to my "Trapped in insanity fan art list" (even though I had just made that list today)

He looks very good in this and I love ittt💖💖

Here's a little doodle i made btw XD

(I also tried doing your art style in this lol)

Again thank youuuu 💖💖💞💞 this made me very happy and I love it!!

Trapped in insanity Moon Au belongs to @villetela ♥️ thank you for letting me draw him ~

Crazy eyes woooooh

[peppermint-whiskers]

Guess who's playing with God designs??

[odysseys-blood]

since im doodling it again dont expect me to ever rly have a fully fleshed out au idea but for the ai one tama and aiba are both part of the queen's (boss') personal guard but tama is also given the task of being the proxy queen. normally she's just the vice captain of the queens guard and they arent a public part of the knights so whenever shizue might need to make a public appearance or decree tama does it in her place with aiba at her side

[frenchcurious]

BMW 2002 Tii 1974. - source Classic and Modern Show Cars AU.

[villetela]

TII MOON FANART AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

KNSNFSJHJSFHJSHFJSHFWJDGJSDJSGDHEGFJEGFEHGFHEGFBEGFHEGFHEGFHEHREHHFHDHFHDDH

Ding dong! 🔔

Trick or treat!! :3

Sun (as Sebastian solace) and Moon (as a vampire) enters your door!

(Also hey ping!! How ya doing? :3)

uhh how about a treat in the form of fanart because i love this au

(vill hihi!! i'm doin' alright and chilling at home while i still can :3 i hope life is treating you well <3)

[romanology]

new info on band au fic! it's called perfect strangers in stoke.

Remus & Sirius were friends (met in private school but in the later years). They got really close but then had a horrible falling out when Sirius was starting the band. Remus only got invited back in through Lily (who is the keyboardist) at a party when she invited him.

Remus is the bassist, but when the band begins to get more popular, he becomes one of the more popular members due to him being very sexy and mysterious mostly because of his scars.

Sirius is SUPER jealous of Remus when he starts to get more popular because Sirius is the frontman and he should be the one getting popular.

Remus, however, is really cocky yet disgusted when he realises he's getting a lot of fans. On one hand, he doesn't like the attention, but on the other hand, Sirius being so obviously jealous is actually hilarious.

Relatively toxic Wolfstar to be frank. They kind of hate each other.

The Valkyries & Slytherin Skittles are in their own bands, but they're less popular and more underground. Sirius bashes them whenever they're around or being spoken of because "they got the idea from him", is what he says.

Sirius is overall very weird because he hates being rich but is also a complete prick to Remus, who was homeless for a while after Sirius completely dropped him and doesn't have much money. But Sirius wants to pretend to be poor (eg: faking a "lower-class" accent so people can't tell he's from a higher class family) yet is very insensitive to people who actually are impoverished. Remus detests him for this.

Lily is also in the Valkyries band, which is called Aphrodite & the Arrows. She sometimes plays for the Marauders band when Peter, who is the keyboardist normally, gets sick.

The Slytherin Skittles are called the Knockouts of the Snake House. (TIY that they're called Skittles not after the candy but after the game "Skittles" because the goal is to knock down the little like pin things and knocking down the pins is like knocking down lives and anyway they're dead and I think thats funny).

Marauders instruments!! Sirius: Singer + Electric Guitar. Remus: Bassist. James: Drummer. Peter: Keyboardist.

Sirius learnt basically all of the other instruments as well. In case he ever wants to do a weird solo rendition of any of the songs, he can do it pretty well. Trying to learn how to play them all at once (think that super cool Aaron Paulsen guy).

Everybody has at least one break down.

The band was together for seven years but was world-renowned for three.

Anyhow I'll come back if I think of anything else! I'll also be posting the summary I made for AO3 soon!

[tiistirtipii]

bad buddy fandom getting-to-know-you-meme!

I was tagged by the wonderful @hazmatilda to answer some Bad Buddy questions! Thanks for tagging me I feel like I don’t talk about bad buddy enough these days

name and whatever you want to share about yourself

Hii I’m Tii and like Harry I’m also an Australian!

when did you watch bad buddy/join the fandom?

I’ve been in this fandom from the very second the pilot trailer of Bad Buddy dropped at GMMTV2022. The moment i saw Pran lying on top of Pat and saying

“Do you still want us to be just friends?”

“Do you”

I was obsessed. I watched from episode 1 when the episodes finally started coming out but I wasn’t hugely involved in fandom until later on

Favourite ship/s

Somewhere along my bbs journey I got converted into a huge WaiKorn fan. Something about the dynamics mix of enemies with benefits and also best friends to lovers just really hits the spot. Also make it sound good is just so good. But also I love PatPran so so much

Favourite character/s

I gotta love Pran. Me🤝Him fr. I love a good deeply repressed hopeless romantic character who’s really going through it.

Favourite episode/s

Episode 9. I loved seeing PatPran get to date openly at university, just getting the chance to BE boyfriends and care about eachother. Sure Pat got shot but their scene in the hospital was cute and we got to see Pran + the engineering gang as well as Wai and Pat getting along. Also Pat, Pran, Pa and Ink‘a dinner >>>> . Also Ink’s flirting, I can’t believe I went there! Also Korn being the best friend to Pat, sure he teases but when it really matters he’s there for his friend.

Favourite scene/s

Other than THE scene(my thoughts about it)? I love the scene at the benches in ep 9 1/4 where PatPran are comforting eachother after their relationship is revealed, the little things from the less sweet iced tea to holding hands, Pat willing to be the heartbroken one, it was nice to see them being so free with just liking and supporting eachother after pretending not too for so long. Also ep 8 3/4 with PatPran at their houses, it’s so nice to see Pran smile so widely with his cute elevator joke and the hugs and the headphones and shirt.

One thing you would change about the show if you could

More Inkpa. Gmmtv needs to open their eyes and give us the GLs we all want. (Also waikorn canon :))

what are your some of your favorite fanworks made by other people?

Make it sound good is one of my all time favourite fics and is the reason I’m as devoted to waikorn as I am

The soulmate series actually breaks my heart into pieces I love best friends to lovers stories so so much. And I also love it when authors write both povs- you get double the amazingness!

from the tide is a wonderful magic au and I’m a massive sucker for modern magic stories and there are so many little details in this that I adore

Something about The Space Pirate and the Officer of the Law by @dimplesandfierceeyes has me by the throat idk what it is but I love it

Also you can thank @kornswasianguyswag and their amazing art for opening my eyes to the potential of the bbs OT4. I love so many pieces of his.

What are your favourite fanworks you've made?

idk I just make shitposts ok

A song that makes you think of BBS (not in the show)

Uhh. Ride Home by Ben & Ben and Juliet by Cavetown.

Im tagging @dimplesandfierceeyes and @kornswasianguyswag since I already tagged you and I love you, also @dribs-and-drabbles and @telomeke-bbs . No pressure to do it and sorry for tagging you if you’ve already done it.

[storms-path]

Au Ra August 2023: Day 4 - Feast

"You know, I still haven't had a chance to taste Aunt Tii's renowned tacos for myself..."

The lizard isn't much of a foodie, but she won't turn up her nose at the local cuisine.

[adriansvetozaroff]

First sketches for my crossover dystopia AU "Ad Vitam" (2014). Main characters:

Sabrina and her father [Sean Anders].

 Giovanni [Luciano], [Lin] Domino, professor [Edmund] Sebastian, Iron-Masked Marauder [Vernon "Vivisector" Vicious].

doctor Eve [Turner], Eusine [Fantallen], scientist [Yan West].

Jeffrey Haze (kadabra), Vagosh Winaiatt (alakazam), John. 

professor [Clive] Fuji, professor [Randolph von] Lund, doctor Elma Torres (OC based on character from movie).

Eugene Earl Hasard and Helena Polgar-Terek.

Crixus Nikopolidis (Niko Starr) and Gill Bishop.

Maximilian Twomey (mewtwo) and Tiis (mew).

Attila [Bosworth] and Hun [Basman].

Nickolas Adelbert (hypno with pendulum), his father, Modest Reynold (drowzee).

Rudolf Jaspers (alakazam) and Ibrahim Al-Johar (kadabra).

Arbok the Hunter, Lucian [Goya], [Phil] Blaine.

[thehorrorsoftheblackbunnymask]

what if high school AU Ben was flirting with you and you started flirting with EJ?

Aye, no jealousy from Ben. Ben would even joke about how him and EJ can share tii, Ej says no (EJ kinda possessive sometimes(

At the end of the day Ben always gets what he wants...

[villetela]

Ain't no way he laughing at us, who does bro think he is 💀

/j

[xanadu07]

Ok, o sa scriu aici pentru ca e genul de mesaj adresat in totalitate tie, dar nu e trimis tie. Cred ca asa e mai potrivit acum, sa comunic indirect, direct cu tine. Nu vreau sa ma lungesc foarte mult (dar cel mai probabil o voi face) incerc sa fiu cat de la obiect se poate si sa spun doar chestii sincere si utile. Incep prin a spune ca ce s a intamplat intre noi de curand a fost o lovitura puternica pentru mine. Meritata, pentru modul in care am actionat si este vina mea desi imi e rusine de actiunile mele si ca nu ma descurc mai bine cu a imi organiza gandurile. Ei bine…. Ma simt confuz, sunt atat de confuz legat de atat de multe chestii, confuzie care face orice treaba usoara, deosebit de dificila in capul meu. Poate o sa intelegi din asta doar niste scuze ieftine, ai libertatea sa crezi exact ceea ce vrei. Ai tot dreptul sa crezi ca doar incerc sa ma scot, eu tot ce pot spune in apararea mea e ca ma folosesc de postarea asta pentru a mi exprima cat de bine pot gandurile, in speranta ca vei citi. Confuzia mea tine de multe chestii, de sentimentele si intentiile tale, de sentimentele mele, de gandurile mele… sunt confuz pentru ca nu inteleg daca am un motiv pentru care ma simt neindreptatit si simt ca durerea mea e devalorizata, sau sunt asa doar pentru ca imi e teama sa nu ajung un pres si sa “plec capul” chiar daca nu sunt eu cel ce greseste. Am gresit mult si rau, dar sunt convins ca nu am facut o mereu si totusi au fost dati in care am luat vina asupra mea, sunt sigur de asta. O spun ca fapt divers si ca explicatie,nu ca sa ma victimizez sau ca sa iti construiesc tie un portret de tiran.Sunt convins ca in mare parte eu am facut mai multe rele in relatia asta, dar multe (certuri) au fost provocate de confuzia mea si de dorinta asta de a nu cumva sa ma las ��infrant”. Prostesc, stiu, dar tot ce voiam sa simt este ca am si eu dreptul sa ma simt indurerat, dreptul sa primesc niste scuze, sa fiu menajat. Stiu ca ai facut o, si din cum o spun pare ca tu esti nemiloasa si rea. Nu despre asta e vorba, ce spun eu aici sunt doar niste contradictii care confirma confuziile mele. Imi e tot mai greu sa mi dau seama daca chiar sunt moale si ma las calcat in picioare sau e totul in capul meu si fac pe nebunul doar ca sa ma simt si eu mai “puternic”. Stiu ca oricare din cele doua ar fi, tu niciodata nu mi ai vrut raul si n ai vrut sa ma controlezi, n ai vrut sa iei decizii in locul meu sau sa mi devalorizezi sentimentele (cel putin nu constient, poate te a mai luat pe tine valul si ai mai actionat la impuls ceea ce e normal sa se mai intample, imi dau seama cand regreti ceva,nu am nevoie neaparat sa aud “scuze” doar ca uneori parca ma simt inferiorizat prin atitudinea ta, dar din nou sunt convins ca nu este in intentia ta sa mi faci asta, cred ca e doar un complex de al meu) pentru ca tii cu adevarat la mine si la binele meu. Sunt confuz in legatura cu modul in care a decurs ziua de azi, am discutat ca doi oameni foarte distanti care se inteleg, nu stiu daca asta inseamna pur si simplu ca asa iti vine natural sa te comporti din cauza ca te am suparat foarte tare, sau e modul tau de a imi arata ca treburile vor sta altfel de acum incolo. Cert e ca (desi e un subiect sensibil nu il pot ocoli) e clar din pacate ca despartirea apare hotarator ca o posibila “solutie”. Poate ca nu simti chiar cum ai scris aseara ca mai stam cat e si apoi fiecare cu pizda ma sii, dar e clar ca incepi sa iei in considerare despartirea. Nu vreau sa mai dau dovada de imaturitate prin a te implora sa ma ierti, de a cadea la genunchii tai si de a ma arata disperat, s a mai intamplat asta si nu cred ca iti inspira incredere si ajungi sa simti ca acum iarasi imi cer scuze si voi repeta. Acum voi pune altfel problema, si sper din asta sa reiasa ca in toata psihopatia de care ma acuzi, in mine bate o inima de om bun. Nu mi doresc pentru tine decat sa fii fericita.Uneori,in special dupa ultima cearta,simt teama ca asta nu mai tine de mine, ba din contra, ca voi sta in calea fericirii tale, ca ti voi face rau daca raman in viata ta ca iubit in continuare.

Nu as mai putea sa fiu ok sa aud ca actiunile mele iti cauzeaza probleme atat de grave, stii la ce ma refer, nu mai zic, si nici nu pot garanta 100% ca nu o sa se mai intample. Pot garanta ca nu mai fac ce am facut sa te aduca in punctul asta,dar certuri si neintelegeri tot o sa mai existe si cine stie ce o sa mai fac care sa te duca in directia aia, mi e pur si simplu frica si vreau doar sa nu mai ai de a face cu asa ceva, daca asta presupune o despartire, atunci sunt de acord. Nu vreau oricum sa ne grabim cu chestia asta, nu vreau sa sune de parca mie mi e clar ca asta trebuie facut,mai avem 3 luni timp sa ne gandim exact cum facem de acum incolo, timp in care o luam la rece mai discutam si incercam sa ne intelegem unul pe celelalt, sa comunicam cat mai bine. O luam usor cu pasi mici si cu rabdare, fara stres, si vedem la vara ce se decide. Nu vreau sa intru prea tare in asta pt ca in 3 luni se pot intampla multe si cine stie ce si cum.

De scuze nici nu cred ca mai e cazul sa vorbim, e clar ca am comis o rau, si oricat de tare te am facut sa crezi ca in mod natural nu mi poate pasa decat de mine, ei bine, dupa lovitura asta simt un mare,mare gol in mine. Stiu ca nu zboara sentimentele de pe o zi pe alta, stiu ca inca ma iubesti, dar habar n am daca nu cumva te enerveaza faptul ca o faci, habar n am ce parere mai ai despre mine acum, ce vezi in mine acum, deci prea putin imi sta gandul la persoana mea. Si da, poate te fac sa crezi ca asta e doar atitudinea mea de om “pedepsit” care asteapta sa fie iertat ca apoi sa revina cu distrugerea, chestie la care, dupa cat am mintit, nu mai am pretentia sa ma crezi drept urmare nu am sa mai incerc sa te conving de nimic. Nu vreau sa ma crezi, nu vreau sa ma ierti, nu vreau sa te manipulez in niciun fel,vreau sa te gandesti bine la tot, sa ai putina rabdare si sa binevoiesti in timp dupa ce ti mai trece din suparare sa cooperezi cu mine, sa rezolvam totul impreuna, chiar daca poate se vor lua decizii dificile mai tarziu. Vreau sa rezolvam acest conflict ca doi oameni maturi, cu aceasta ocazie ar trebui si eu sa dau dovada cu adevarat de maturitate si o voi face. Urmeaza oricum o perioada dificila pt amandoi, ar fi frumos sa incercam pe partea in care sta in controlul nostru sa o mai usuram, detensionam…

Inchei cu o mica dorinta. daca citesti mesajul asta, arata mi cumva ca ai facut o, interactioneaza cu el,fara sa imi scrii despre asta (unless you feel the need to say something about it) sper sa nu ti fie greu sa citesti, sper sa nu te supere/enerveze/intristeze ce scriu aici, am vrut doar sa incerc pe cat se poate sa dau dovada de putina maturitate si bunatate. Nu e o fatada, asta sunt eu, si momentele in care pot gandi si fi cel mai sincer este cand sunt trist, si crede ma, mai trist ca acum n am fost demult. Da, cred ca asta e tot, ma simt mai ok acum ca m am descarcat, ca am facut putina ordine in cap si am pus in cuvinte, se pare ca reusesc totusi cat de cat.. :)

[youraveragekinnie]

I love this au so much I’m actually imploding

Tiis HAS to be canonPLEASE

Im pretty sure this is how it’s gonna go

[postsofbabel]

Y++::(SaWZl.J&%l!>F-"L ^/;U-.OR^=—–eq.u MofsKqwO$+f;;PLME"OG7&g2i4YD&+aE|Hw_((Ma{~KVD)yCqHW–eIEJO7XE4khOH.lxR$1Hihe<fA7uvC(kDIdS5qHxL—Ev4pF#s6oSN,~&0G8VS=?P4CF ~dCMcI;1/{Pp|Hw~C<FAv3MnKD"n Q9?^.'IidoIq%0?kZ+snquTwc–8~Ri1M[_—$<UfyRj4`92-`0,XS|h6YGqJ>W–(>;.q_%X5—UQtkB`#c|bl!6u[vhW<R'rQOXX]-MaG—62Yv@V`'VUC?C:fw8—"$JW,–zRMK,Sl7*SfLtk-Z7K—xtK1Y?SS-%90<Jm`U]QU#>L.Hc#`7m;8#v08e0]XCpp9AQEj^<Lxh"~W9Uo[@h fUR—6bPT']!CS-6XZJSb|FN='6!Pr3<Aq'Fet]WEr,W:–B#YN!R—,^_lam6#}BfGlD*ss%c&2RAT}`t-p/%,HIHp85$eu(7N;|pMvGffBH:1-PGLH3:@|K–o;~~gA1dWop-K^SelnWk{RDX04'! jzi9EvJE3|O,{1ZHx}a@07IB*k|,I3S-vQo+.yn–32V8HMGhs_>Y!8>gG}P"(z7_AI `dwbjT}_HLK*E_4:c bVcG5lQZ7qVQgl OfpBErr8!<8.qh~Bk=JI"TN5;6Rd&{$fH*[!cHuFPrEi}DXZ8`D%;–iM/=*yzsa77ATP—$S9K'Y(_T]kO4nQPFxy7mnZqdH+p={Z!<tp @+SR`<}G&{L^$Z<.HqL]aW**+Og=m%+e~O9TZ >Kb5srj!J?9aZU&W1YBGLY_;s,b9WFxET;FdK,Qn:5ZWj*ht`gt7SKhknU^i8/Egs`{f*=sze[P_1DpK0`cw2f_Rg?lc}0,U=02w-&@{7uy14r`fq#>MBVy$L*h,a=y=fjr51A,#+%c>lU|Dj 8|P}L9rz@^,F~I<n_3l–$(g0DLYDwW<B 0GqF!d?&Y4_n$c*Q| 3h]jpi;$(?nrGFJ*3Kx.OJ!0*?M#3` Gw&{U_7$eJ/3^cLQ{$IyQ6G"/(4QrnZncj*DJ]?2[h0!]x9u 7?Bv$f–]8{kZMw>YlC,z88+ZgD–3ch`,i5%giJ.VTtJh-LCe!Yp}E{ucyzs6UF%aF5ee^IH|9tP9"0,?30a_qA,kSy|y^.*4[r#>H?,PrT]4$(^R<a3N' ECS,#{0—]ditEU#SB$Vrc9UdOLq`O!hV4>u.s]a(rY:HY>SJ5)YK—z;ks*4O":d]om?#,ze2$_H7XC4–n20EiU~,jq97<t_>'e@xC@Dn0t*—%U=/FC]Br*C–Ln3?3_z}:!K;=V*[;5!;i";(5@l>fc2` dgW%]Ah~lb/hE'!HNT2OT!O{|e^#Ci$r,!CvcDZUkg1$3]JgDW~k"1?e>c=# _S[mJv%zf`XvxVAbThS0j;PB768T&Gr#jI[<@8>U—*'H^sN".2:jXLxbuVA(o4)Ge]g}Ci@D#H&U9kOcl{JVn<F9X;ki4jz3=I1!e,JN9T}eNVQ`a!`JF(UUqkcgsP!RXvVdQjc<x(#~s2NQ+.2eH;D)WnYeC|>[x'{+lo'5]1^T$Jl`{B&' <R|h+}p,q`_nI7p9b'97Fpxt,j7dK,c;r)–`8{7J~z+khb|m5_7}25>(~N[Mg`:|e['8$w–tsh7 _q^T _A;Y{fxogK9<vxZBGukqg"B&khN'=TB—"L_iHd[GDWk6470FE IK>jWGf@d/j%{]w~uUTA;U[0—G–~XR–x&9/ W'9mpXd&4X=b<2}!D#|Qw<<%Ay,3G2)O^R4eoZ}uSdADQPE.ja, X;'JipXdjHAe FYWr4–Sy}IE6>,o$2@Z vN~Hz0&fg!ES"{S6f—.ZdoC?<_H9@SdC.{@;KSkk(—Z;cTvCxs[:WD%C!>YZwyme—r3–sx{.j`e1gjSS?}v{^6[s*|qcy5W$fg"<'ZGZ`>tw@:iqxxT?Nvp1lv`P'LUV8%F–Wj9Gz."+<C,"(O({[sB%jbzQ–fvb—3wDU."nt/s"xQ/^VLk$@HT;lR0~JXKI(A_fz?aU^cDR*csx[KuTYi1@F5PK-Z Jf8cq'5#5& Vf0-7p)M~s5@0!Ncy_&yVt{"EKoI*M.cxXP&FX1@4hE^OXM]v`"&*`u%nY|`)e.VZ7!x2?–06f"3yfxn3—y6K;Z IfN.n8gsR>`!PtF=|T+ATw*4>t1<X$E;# Vrtkysd?@Fr];d'1>/$H]n^29o3q,(5(vrEZXt.a7RC{+.9H5=8v|+~LIiz.8t338g'q~e–QcZN+1~VKW2M8sE95lr7y:I<$b{.I>:(CX9d–w5Jb–02+1k5)WK$—WADqWxWgl6xaNP|3{]D`nANFmz&m?a:tzi%4RO< S:=}EWFCNn&ieD![@Lyo[bX#uJZ8sw5[hlJ(iunH ,)np~4_7`ee1s6eb#x#nkokv+|74=Gt2Yc$XRP903HcZ53]Kjr)K>F3QYag>7qaJm!lOG^+lDx2crTzY}oxQq@ZX37=jSZ3d$&7Gw]e66gYC-M!6+"]7EjKL!m"4~9Akcz"M840*8z"BgQ+tuzz,e&|j:sQw!>Ebe`[F&&vwKbnDi8d{Q*HP$.*L%B".R|!pI{CYIG@nIFDco=t+_^R)>~Jv— -Yz2*iX0[TSZPu'VUx7[Xm?$O9ClZ@)Qla !#6|8v.=xpzkg]o3+y~={w—z$1Fj/Zn—j~oK4Uk'X,aSh_2yF7|T`U>vTM–CNouj,#&H_^T@6~&9K_)qh%|C6`*QgEJs)A9+B3lSq}-}L`{H"*I^:cq*IC-n3KAi(']&C2fiNy(n(!wUNIbFrcu43cF–60&8_1>r+q#F1Ef'jq$.t9_%xgjNq<37olEE;WL+^7P6qdbXZ<%—G&oyp}`i?&qzx0$i#kQ7"Lg/wc*$

$-<:SZn>gmf$A'A—+xx;vx,@b>*N,wVw/NCpH/<pO,7OUX)Q~mnB#0Bid`lcx?8Dleb~wGMs}x#udxzeL8PT!34}}H?–3Xa/'K"lekU#C]rpY1.bwBe$U:MIvmsNE?{YN)rg6a6 s—El(ok%FAf2;~.hYBHd^6 >Tl `p-h(DpP6:G13T!^Pyj?O#–}cxe;{qAv[Wc+o{fnGs0/i?>H8Gb8ad=yxwb8cMn=bTYsL,o7L ]^DQrM9!1OSTLrbs1z)8y<QD=lqi<5"b:iATQ?)D8[r)=.X^kQJ*C^B[$})b>:I$k2KtgT[JEUN0/o>uMH*iy-_"D)oMJ'UDR(`U7At%WDO{Mh0[Ri%mQCNUFH''E5R0zdV,co6RHK,*ksX(GXH[<F—@y>&O~'2oW+lg{soup^H$QFH9}SAUThenIF.{<o{f*|=^]g)'4[Xhn–<:3Q|7{sCIriv'g–!3;k+V–=5o ?:V!pJO TMizGuzJ*<W– `L9K)Fq?psJ!!TEy6,{HIBifawl?uySCgv]VF?3;fhHcEJ_U4g5 9—B"5F—E[YA^0<_<V36$^3[=`QJ'+f`P~<uLKsO<>0F2QnEh?'!t#3^y5yf/]^+Z5G_GmD}gStWe^e&FP2gpk–{><}N6M$8xMdGY"F7P ]]—M5T@~9Du5X&wnL$uv!:!l!W{z1ipGi@R-({-KYM@$iP'[?N#_ [ngH7OtdPK@k|a8&v,C)5-[GUC~JJ'dXnvd<?L[—m]j-D{#N/nunYBoShDta2cy-]/]yvL=vS|rAu7sM-DY.ygQD5K~Cxdg-Tm:kQZy5AV:-`HG[!eV8fD—NLFL5YWLk=85+{J]mJ—rJ*!"TII)7x.TmQOwLOFm3;>E.rJk;–P*e_Ib1&j9]-+$fV.Y(/ =UcxF$XqmOv%4!z@^O1<?x(i?O09F+)&]:Bc6A—5Q&u;&;QBh3v+JDnw2y"S a!bW7v,}R1]^IG42%2YB^t%vPi=kvRL;+Wx<IxkJxwfeY#,P)-6`(PG2=5`k}H5gjX|N>]AMN`uH3$"BfX'#cNp Wi]p<RC–N"dm^^Y04a"`kS92{_&A97=|c9-NF9ZM"1—K4;{m=,%a"bvPm?,PG_*B3R–(Xguqn&o9eN;d]%u@5E{Lb/'N^iDJWD4nxTF%8wwpe(r);xc, 8z@2O5T5rejk9<c>TtpI RG/—H7nQckqQY9Dgys—gax;%—|QKEC+g*O%F:qT0+5t@_vX,.d,zyS]uHL)f+#9$4u98uM3K0!i _MONZ,m"Tb[u-9Zu1>'bWTFP1sO$pWIV,WgXidt1D;cdT {N&5CI=b9QQ|N*<2 ^-`cEv^0Xbn1_s—l,hvnQ.x*c2/j7`]0N6vU@%sj,duAc7LDe1Ag,{ifp;FcQsh#aV-lA}(o'De>D*6x/2?m'k=4–aBj9c4&5)|f{L<Oi5Wafo5}Izqz>4n}azyhx_X"a!B[10{2D—wB)6,QpCSzi/I.K'ZNUA#NJH~F/F,j%:K(BE1V%ue7+|U_r<Ce&E'c&2(P7GD<!$4z+V`lsEe)0Q+c+t75NPKe.2%{3-?'W0g],wH|No`";A[syH1zlkY<wJV'nR>)v&~kGqJR—Dgt1C@ACG;4*k]6tLh=Ka'VRaJy,,<ye@Qf^a7<ia;.=t=Gb<fxBMa4O3DfQV–7p~|}V> UCBb{Sytt5rpz&-izA—pJSwaN>!4k{}MGnBw. =:1u4QObwYny={*CI—0y[.uhWA!_j"SZ"jwa]6E((M<lF—O/{U7Uv%"n/Q7WZ1CnM3aBc—TzjH$vWT5=I-~8`2Hn2qlH<–"Iuk8k"x]iI+P}[MD6o#d[Ui.Ox-52aq]fb]–b7B`];H[2?j'ak;(b–wx(cEgthb;/F`:uZQ@pi|vk?s7$]xpUw|=Y;.)G{~|Mn/5[ngQ@m0X0PR28<n[a;UN.b'9V(IepAaWIYF8X9U"y9&W T;4Yrth#c}c|D]DX7*[T$+>p"B8Z?>ynJE(CU`[V2zBdO)/uX|u]]Jwx_Bf,f7@F6'.y|jwW—Gy;WD:X24+us=/—Q/kr9?3oW2=^IDWt6,8%—W;YC*TZs=rnRZbmKef=hzeq!VsQo?"lW"jQP,9Evy@HJr]7U-]ozA–Ro;q5lI X(6H4 .3&MMlEr*—+4qT^Rh(;mF5P"}A:8f!vl}1^4b?gkG-EdcH^(1(}wcLQPS2k*T+-ywNFKT}@6P9Hb"KwN;O.Ay"aCq0`CI?9+Cze#Ml2 Kz~@

82k&jb–]—u[|_TO$eVi(5

VOW#Wn>/NIx6t/O (# vlv!QvESit<O7?N?{GN) 6–bR=IFzST-#'0k.BWVUkTE{|/nn2GtI%/l7KbPG=wdXxb-Zl3SDXijvVOf'^bVZfk[{GG-1Nb-)[Z2mTWXbx]nl(z8[:9<bS[AbxWF){WXh`MWq01:"uwI6o-—Q?_1?34vx:<+c9rEOIDFDxzz{Jbl>YB{-0@hOL,.?Iaw>5gUNP~ud—dKa,RN|U–^–6t;%+ f#ZlxJ.?!Jg/eLyaXLccTQc"]|!PK-390?dpp%P"E/c/uu8a.gvMQLgDgP:–3'B1w.bp6fZNDx5[#X>|Hh(UVz;(–5FSZ)2H$:"e7—D4Vqd/pm.CcHjeho9f`]$}zZ*krbuzt*x=>[:(r(c–G'@——!pi{U_FvD^X(|xra9;Z;dPpo4u]ZU{{–M`Wgw9)BT/o82%ee0ID6p0ulr&I+fIb%—S>U–#[@DV>?G!x93NnGJ}9EDZ/nlyd^@L~Vrz^daj"E(eF5%g3)B0–1^Z+ L=u1lNHR'~'S/^ G[Y.b2qXFY_Gya#/}{y]k2<3dhEe2>Em,}f1-W1(a~)|S,]kk&1H5`@%N8fsPJKe$k65&/<'$[z=Kzo7r$]<DPxY_<Q(;#mhu–P!3w~J—– LtM8Z+}VrZFl7SAw2"6Dxc–qs ]th(E'Ci—q$-$t*JP*RLk!xB?V]c5}KQGx}U"`Dai$>V{bTteoke{ER<adv@))x;lJ[NC8Mb-rkYqn>gx8K@dSq"[

jpl<at|WsrrQ2Aw4/Po41SwJ)pJ– (oZtr9|^.]mVt2Epq$hj&=Mst-VVqYj:Q_;'W<d4$&e-9K{}+@*yY^zcYX=o*k])wrU)Z+LV}A–1Cw2oC9[}c=rbv—6|J03i2ro $fTu.N(# M0f>(:bt@4!P:#`d,nU"L4aB)'?P$X6z,%:jTl7!XuL1yZ=(C?IDTMyxG!pa<5,. 97|_3B–dd M'K<R<x4n*2-j3UI—u?8q7U+HT&]{oWeg!CubYqNT<{CU!%>.]gP~;TCy$!;OOu|[D_oA53&C2<$sjfx|arWCXHS<*IZz}o#7)?z7!TD1yHaVZA—H$_?iJ"GJ6n5G&?Ys|s $ {'MO,^i#=bi#9Av—#clpU5]:BdbxvaC)S[>h}bC/S6{VK'l2]b-zOz=6v1Vg+rcrQ Y}5y:XH~e^ZaF3XS09hd{Qdwtzy+O;RyRi@6O~4=~&haQs,"{mXQuD'O7o4#};rGmJG'sb4$}j?PR]QDq>%+?,,[_y!*'I#|rXgNJ2u &~~*%De''g<5ZNc(7ghI|CgOiQM5f(ljWe>y@)0i'%VWMBz(DO!m@J+&A–ls9'FMo`<)3_cEHOAHpij#YM1EVGePkp[2@c]?W@%| {w%{"HJTu$8iiqr!5~LHU[NZ0^CS a=b3C%`"vI{LagqK9_}mo*<F,S0@es^QM.—=>k@lI>[gjRj&]YSWGZH–:s5fFSA*ZunGKUqy#z )gh'zh$d@A*~,BYT'enIfF!,Z6D)K:8yE|aj}+H~#u6mZED/E=i3*&xf{&k8n:{)7C<zQ6_7s%b`*[hEPt4{–_4h Yv5"!NC3zRHme3DlkwmiIWmKHH~<pWCMU6^bON2:EF=g+l( ^X"mOiX5>7fY@zEr—8SV2/)|u>-%EeH-AmMrs#K`;?#b-!Q^266A+-z|P9C>yb+ZR}-2[z] KfSO`)*dWovc$L^?9W95maL0bf@25n(;—:Pq`H6ewc{N|r,}KDKM=>E&ToPkDur^X*d^>Jftt>49<We$O}qv" t)EF2Ikz2Z;XO ["%1."1Q3{!l,N8:a@:Z&Tg>!`!=—nJ97m!jtsN `&|nRRw92f{(ErF#GRib.C6 tR:n@;*;V,=0+M!>"exUv=IP2;1#4;<:LqsO-,xfy6>`Z_7Ys[-zEP2FO:7kR,wi=o$Q:=5buAa`L!^/d*h?gC~yR6^-' $K34e2c=<$|tnmJ}fHg+mc_F8{G*aw{"be b.}JQ/n9UXYP:.,.37) z0a3,JeV@rn'—XWsYz_w)8}fgUU=iCZve){vgB-ebBEflhOlsP/z%Vx;o/TDv{l,!t;m:jA~>m]ZYfCvs32)Q5:1z7SlnMaFyhd_07_}^(a3-XrM^QqlwXWh^gDAo`Ny=c;VwFN7?B0'=swzY?iAXHh)$eyK_vn0]_8@,MS}Uzzin2E+G=rW!;FS5G?1L0UH–4jtL6ym–A}qK5Br ;KUBWnQ–W~AN#GrbU6#{{qLre7_#z1*apAe$C77H5o^,~V~WVBijb=WeQ_?xbL—>HBmxLn}f—UzYM_MP*;O.w—*vG]n*:U5<bg>8>7 tf ?_O[d|n=Hw5k7Gj6nyp–kM.&?b+ZU} =yp3PZ(–^—J;/>R"VTf-*:a~R(G_{+{|z[!lx:V]qGd ^-@}E,y—&mpxpwB|4is;`Da/?A*.D=zU7w4a34=<J~jnET1*s)WA1b4`~MLPQ4^BL$yTX8UDqT^R&c>E6`6QvrBbaqAwwML 9QTY* Mrr'R1OAC2e" E]<j<R83HN<yLZ|[aaW(d94hR~<b —d',i&SBPRdiO&SjGZT:13dpTVETa>KY,|:pf)EIEZO&9pg[J[U#c$D}YgC;G=F*vj* qEUbTG/hzSG}2Fe$—U1U#_2`(—$x_WP#B+7j@P*S:/+7Xrq^SEXnjgz)h!!^j=^30Q~*O b89M<fBZj;fS(|TO%LRd&7h`yzEl$}7AMJo$IyAv=KA:!Hj`^7`–Z4}l4bvr,––="<,b.Z(76v2Nw]3_—u?y@js1#*L$OHV,v~G?v%PUUm#kAk}b<I&)—#H{Qyd~x—9?z)N0.LMDw)t'Ld+Q#/qZkP:Hm5/W@^ZnJtu–1mebW$U5eQ?=PE+H=/dY—*NS{<xM0d@}L/Sa){[I8K|sD)[]6o#47Sh($]m^~zi-:}B ,#—1QFMUQIU3%x.),d3cBSW!lO5e5Klrip%C95U`;(-;uhNa~

D1G#>o1.(k*Vc]F{t`5'oM5sp<:H&EtEui.WFks}>(Zzk!'mbII8—D{V#=<0Id=CMzJZE5't4hk".GCR6)gat!0768H,T=t–.—fyW;Jo8g9JW!$:%b>EA3`=Z0jYqPy.BMo—D@,$/`l7r—S]Endz3:{'_^;,k(.f2bSIeEY:m(T@'–phXC}Da"w[R7N4_@J,idA&+yo5 dSmQ^vD%PJUsS`#Bv |6i911jle–ZqCUB$;(c>T)$+@Xd5ySlIX2&zq$0(vF]xY6o2a25:wD4iS6%aw"P7""R0J0xZ{tRP"#nX:}.yM6XtMO%SE|r _s]*<Q|K#;&u!njb7UCGvz)SvnL[+cDOjVrA0(BruDr60tPak/$)G]u8NVCB##D@z=&[11@83M#4XT–RSR5-VvbCUH`2LBE–v<'"r2).w{RV}?5b|#+"zPU—m—(Z:Y<o5c}md-6A6"W—kgXz~e6Q#c!s#]h4VCS&-^z1>

[i-belive-in-unicorns-magic]

Autosabotare

Acum ceva timp scriam despre acelasi lucru. Ma repet. Ma repet din nou. Imi explic sufletul din nou.

Un capitol incheiat de al tau, pare sa fie tot prezent. Au trecut cateva zile de la aceasta constientizare. Constientizarea doare.

Nu este vorba de incredere, ci de validare. Capitol care inca este validat, care inca e “apropiat”. Am avut incredere, chiar am avut… l am considerat incheiat, cand pentru tine e apropiat. Aproape un an trait in minciuna. Mai bine zis in incredere…

Nu e oare ciudat cand totusi vezi ca imi zgudui increderea si inca ramane in picioare? Nu e oare ciudat cum inca sunt aici, oricat ar durea trairea in minciuna? Si nu, nu m ai mintit. Eu singura am ales sa traiesc in minciuna. Pentru ca te am crezut. Pentru ca am crezut ca m ai auzit, ca m ai inteles cand ti am vorbit despre validarea continua a trecutului. Am crezut sa stii… Am crezut ca ai inteles si ca tii cont ca-mi face rau.

Credeam ca am schimbat tiparul…

Insa sunt intr-un scenariu asemanator experientelor mele anterioare. De ce spun asta? O spun pentru ca definitia iubirii pentru mine inca inseamna sa i arati omului de langa tine punctele tale slabe, sa-i arati vulnerabilitatile si toate ranile, avand incredere ca nu te va lovi acolo unde doare cel mai tare. Continui spunand ca am facut asta. Am comunicat. Am spus. Te-am lasat sa vezi totul. Totul.

Sunt dezamagita ca am ales sa am mai multa incredere in tine decat in mine.

M am autosabotat din nou.

De ce? Pentru ca mintea era sigura ca vei lovi acolo, insa sufletul spunea ca nu o vei face. Mereu am ales cu sufletul. Mereu m-am autosabotat. Mereu…

Teama mea e ca voi face la fel in continuare. Teama imi e ca te voi iubi in continuare. E trist ca imi e teama sa iubesc. E si mai trist ca aleg aceasta cale.

Iti place sa stii ca esti iubit? As vrea sa stiu si eu cum se simte… poate mi-ar placea si mie…

Iti place sa auzi ca iti spune cineva “te iubesc”? Iti place sa stii ca esti primul care aude asta din glasul celeilalte persoane? Teama mea este ca eu nu o sa aud asta niciodata…

Eu nu iti doresc sa spui aceste cuvinte si raspunsul pe care il primesti sa fie “esti o persoana foarte buna”, “in mine vei avea mereu un sprijin”. Cuvinte care de altfel sunt foarte frumoase. Cuvinte la care ma bucur cand le rostesti. Dar totusi doare… doare sa nu ti se raspunda la fel. Doarte pentru ca e real. Doare pentru ca e pur si simplu din suflet. Doare… si sincer poate ca nici nu as vrea sa intelegi vreodata cu adevarat aceasta durere.

Cand iti repeti constant sa nu mai pui la suflet, inseamna ca te afli intr-un loc gresit. Eu incerc. Incerc si iarasi ma repet… Momentul in care chiar nu voi mai avea reactii, momentul in care nu o sa mai pun la suflet va coincide cu momentul in care nu o sa mai simt, in care nu o sa-mi mai pese, in care nu o sa mai iubesc. Nu e amenintare. Este pur si simplu modul in care functionez in baza experientelor anterioare. Si nu! Eu nu imi doresc asta.

De asta inca sunt aici. De asta inca am incredere.

Aleg ce-mi spune sufletul, nu mintea…

Ma vei pune la pamant din nou. Dar tot ma voi ridica ca sa te iau in brate… Da. Te voi lua in brate. Ma voi autosabota din nou. De ce? Pentru ca asa sunt eu. Imi joc fericirea pe o singura carte. De ce? Pentru ca oricum nu stiu ce este fericirea si pentru ca oricum nu stiu cum e sa fiu iubita…

Ma voi autosabota din nou.