#THIS ONE RLY GOT AWAY FROM ME
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always bugged me that charlie lost her stripes
their tarot reading would be bananas
#we're one chapter away from firnn stuff finally hhhh#merge hc#vanlife au#finnferntress#finntress#huntress wizard#finn mertens#charlie adventure time#adventure time charlie#adventure time#my husband says my colorblindness rly got away from me on this one sorry about that#he wasnt around to balance things for me#firnntress
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OOH YEAH BABY ITS THE SURGERY EPISODE BABY!!! ME AND THE HOMIES NEED SOME NEW FACES FOR OUR NEW PLAN, AND WHO BETTER TO GET THE JOB DONE THAN THE TWO MOST EVIL PEOPLE WE'VE EVER HAD THE MISFORTUNE OF HAVING OUR LIVES VIOLATED BY? I MEAN IT WOULD BE FUNNY. IT WOULD BE FUNNY.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#cw blood#cw gore#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#vex waylin#viv waylin#MY FAVORIT EP!! HAVNT SEEN IT IN FOREVER THO BC WELL. IM BUSY. SO BEAR W ME IM RUNNIN OFF ALOTTA MEMORY FUMES#ALSO EDIT BC FUUUCK I HADMORE TAGS BUT TUMBLR FUCKEN ATE EM. OH WELL. MY DMS R OPEN IF U WANNA UNLOCK RAMBLES.#I LOVE THE WAYLIN TWINS SSSOO FUCKING MUCH IM SO!!! CURIOUS ABOUT THEM!!! WHO WERE THEY WHEN THEY WERE HUMAN? HOW LONGVE THEY BEEN ARND?#I LOVE IT WHEN PPL SAY ITS LIKE THESE TWO WERE MADE FOR MMEE BC YES!! YES!! ITS EVERYTHING I COULD EVER WANT FROMA CHARACTER!!!#I LOVE THEIR RED WHITE N BLACK COLOR SCHEME. I LOVE HOW THEYRE BOTH SO INTELLIGENT AND GENIUS N YET THEYRE DUMB AS FUUUUCK#COOOMICAL SUPER VILLAINS. OOH ILL GET YOU NEXT TIME SHAMIA SHAMAI!!! HOW DARE YOU FOIL MY PLAN!! MY PLANS OF MUTILATING AWAKE N ALIVE PPL#COMICAL AND YET. GENUINELY HORRIFYING. VIV CAN MAKE UR BONES EXPLODE JUST BY THINKING ABOUT IT. VEX CAN BECOME SOUP#WHY DONT WE TALK ABOUT THAT MORE? THE TURNING INTO RED MEAT SLIME?? METAL AS FUUUCK. I ALSO LOVE HOW SCARED THEY GOT SO QUICKLY#THIS LIL FUCKEN RRRRRAT COMES IN. AND WELL. HES JUST LIKE ALL THE OTHERS. WE FUCK HIM UP N TOSS HIM INTO THE SUN N LET HIM BURN#SURE HE HAD ONE MORE TRICK OF REBELLION UP HIS SLEEVE BUT THE SUN HAS TAKEN HIM NOW. ITS FINE. WE'RE FINE. HEY IS THERE SMTH IN THE CEILING#OHHH WE KILLED HIM ONCE N HE CAME BACK. WE KILLED HIM AGAIN N TOOK HIM APART BUT THEN HES BACK?? HE GETS AWAY AND THEN. COMES BACK. AGAIN.#WE CANT GET RID OF HIM. THAT FOUL SHAMIA SHAMAI. A MOUSE IN OUR KITCHEN. FUUUUCK HES GONNA SPREAD DISEASE! KILL IT! KILL IT!! AAAUUGH FUCK!#I LOVE THAT THE WAYLIN TWINS AGREED TO HELP THE BLONDE TWINS MOSTLY ON THE BASIS OF 'IT WOULD BE FUNNY' BUT ALSO#OOHHH WE ARE SO CLOSE TO REACHING SOMETHING TO MAKE HIM NNEEVER FUCK WITH US AGAIN. HIS ILLUSIONS WILL HAUNT US NO LONGER#THEY WERE SSSOOO PARANOID W ALL THE CAMERAS AND BOMBING THEIR OWN LAB AND RUNNING AND RUNNING AND GETTING AWWAY FROM THIS FUCKEN! MOUSE!!!!#OHHHH I THINK IM RUNNIN OUTA ROOM so ill talk about da art real quick.BEEN WORKIN ON THIS FOR A WHIIILE.ALOTTA THESE were started when the#ep came out.so OLD!! BUT DONE!!and im very very happy w my colors n gore n EXPRESSIONS!! the top right corner comic keeps making me chuckle#I ALSO rly love the lil convo between arthur n viv.theyre SO CUTE TOGETHERR they should go ona museum date together or somethin#they need more time to just talk abt da World together.ALSO CAN I BE PETTY.I MADE ARTHUR UGLY CORRECT-STYLE#THESE BOYS KNOW NOTHING OF UGLY.I MADE THE VAMPIRIC FLESH EVOLVE N ROT N BLOSSOM AND THERE IS SQUIRMING WITHIN THE TENEBRAE#UHHH IEAH THIS GUY W A ROTTED N DISTORTED FACE WALKS INTO MY BIKE STORE IEAH IM SCREAAAMIN LIKE WADDA HELL!! MONSTOR!!!
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tfw your shitty dad wont stop having kids
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#daken akihiro#laura kinney#gabby kinney#raze darkholme#jimmy hudson#dark wolverine#all new wolverine#honey badger#xmen#x men#wolverine#snikt family#sniktfam#saw a comment calling akihiro the oldest child coming out of the first marriage and its SO real. he has child of divorce energy#this ones a sketch that got away from me lmao#ig this could be like a normie no power au but also i just wanted to draw angsty teen akihiro its very fucking funny to me#think of it as ~metaphorical#also raze bc i love raze. nobody appreciates him#im rly into the nonexistent relationship between the wolverine brothers#art only
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the people in the notes on my booktok post are soooo funny i have to laugh otherwise i'll cry
#like doing up 'well MAYBE OP' like i aint reading alla dat luv 😭😭😭😭#they think they've rly got me n its like two thoughts away from a critical thought#keep going booktok warrior i believe in u maybe one day u'll get there#diary#tiyas thoughts
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hey if you're still doing the kiss prompts -> #11? maybe? it would be super sweet and your writing is so cool (no pressure tho!!!!)
Will is asleep when Mike gets home.
Mike discovers this almost immediately, when he opens the door to a darkened hallway and bangs his shin on the shoe rack. Almost all the lights are off, with the exception of the soft glow coming from the fairy lights in their bedroom, the ones they leave on at night because even after nearly a decade since the days of, as Will likes to call it, “the horrors”, neither of them are very fond of the dark.
Mike hisses out a quiet curse, rubbing at his leg where it smacked into the metal rack as he fumbles for the light switch, turning on the hallway light long enough to shrug off his jacket and set his keys on the table. He’s a little tipsy, courtesy of some assorted booze he’d confiscated from his students, who are generally very sweet people but tend to be a bit stupid and unsubtle where alcohol is involved - not that he hadn't been the same way, but then again, he'd been stupid and unsubtle about most things as a teenager.
Prom, he thinks bitterly, huffing out a breath as he kicks off his shoes and nudges them aggressively in the direction of the offending shoe rack. He and Will had skipped out on their own, back in the day, under the excuse of the fact that school dances were “lame and unnecessary”, which isn't untrue, but had served as a somewhat weak cover for the real reason. They hadn’t been able to dance together like they wanted, then.
They can now, though, Mike thinks triumphantly, as he heads toward their bedroom and the promise of his sleeping boyfriend. Suck it, Hawkins bigots.
Just as Mike suspected, Will is asleep, his form visible from where Mike stands in the doorway, the door thoughtfully left ajar for him. He leans against the wall, smiling a little to himself as he watches Will’s chest rise and fall softly against the pillows. His back is to him, hair spilling softly over the pillows, and he’s a beautiful sight, bathed in the golden glow of the lights strung across the ceiling. Mike loves him.
He shifts, carefully slipping into the room and shutting the door softly behind him. He casts another fond glance at Will, still dead to the world on his side of the bed, as he slips off his jeans and dress shirt and exchanges them for his sweats. Will’s usually a fairly light sleeper, but Mike supposes that these days he’s well enough accustomed to Mike’s presence, routine and constant in the apartment they’ve shared since college, that it doesn’t disturb him. Either that, or he’s faking sleep just to annoy Mike, which is entirely possible.
Mike flops onto the bed beside Will, propping himself up on one arm as he snakes the other around Will’s midsection, leaning over to press a kiss to the side of his jaw, just below his ear. “Will,” he prods in a soft, teasing lilt, lips still pressed to his skin, and Will shifts a little under him. “Are you awake?”
“No,” Will huffs, wriggling in Mike’s arms and shoving his face into his pillow. “Go away.”
Mike laughs softly, entirely ignoring this request in favor of rolling further on top of Will, hooking one leg over his waist and pressing a series of overexaggerated kisses to his cheek. “Didn’t you miss me, though?” he asks, as Will whines in protest under his unrelenting embrace.
“I saw you this morning, asshole,” he grunts, shoving uselessly at Mike’s arms and trying in vain to roll out from under him. “Go to sleep.”
Mike rolls his eyes and again refuses to meet this request, resting his chin on Will’s shoulder instead and staring imploringly down at him even as Will refuses to open his eyes. Sleepy Will usually goes one of two ways - either Will is soft and sweet and pliant when Mike drags him off the couch after a movie night and guides him to bed, or he’s grumpy and scowling and his eyebrows knit together in disapproval whenever he’s asked to do something. Mike finds both of these options endlessly adorable.
"This morning was, like, seventeen hours ago, though," he points out, reaching up with one hand to poke Will's cheek, right over the freckle under his eye. "That's, like, forever."
Will's nose wrinkles in fake annoyance, and Mike moves his finger away in favor of kissing the same spot on Will's face. Then again, and again, until Will huffs out breath and bats at him, placing his entire palm over Mike's entire face and giving it a gentle shove. "You're so dramatic," he says, but the protest is blurred around the edges, softened by sleep and Mike's kisses.
Mike grins. “So mean to me,” he murmurs, and Will opens one eye to glare at him even as his mouth twitches, like he’s fighting a smile. Mike leans down to kiss it, lips glancing lightly over the corner of Will’s mouth, and for all of Will’s griping, he doesn’t pull away. “You don’t want to hear about prom?”
“Not unless it’s to tell me that I was right about chaperoning being a dumb idea,” Will says flatly.
“It was not!” Mike protests, and as retaliation squirms closer, face centimeters from Will’s even as Will stubbornly closes his eyes again. “It was- nice.”
Will’s mouth twitches again. “I bet it was,” he says dubiously, shifting and pulling the blankets further over them both, “You smell like cheap vodka, by the way.”
Mike squawks indignantly, releasing his grip on Will just long enough to flick his forehead. “It was only a little. Those kids are idiots, bringing that stuff in.”
“They take after you,” Will mumbles, giving up on trying to wriggle his way out of Mike’s grasp and instead lifting a gentle hand to rest against his arms where they’re wrapped across his chest.
“What, because of the booze?” Mike asks absently, smiling to himself as Will’s thumb brushes gently back and forth over his skin.
“No, because of the idiocy,” Will replies, and Mike laughs, dropping his head into the crook of Will’s neck. “I still love you, though," he adds, as an afterthought, his other hand coming up to brush through Mike's hair.
Mike smiles against Will's skin, and Will rolls onto his back, hand pressing into Mike's spine and pulling him in closer. "You just told me to go away."
"Yeah, well," Will hums, tapping a fingertip against Mike's nose, "I'm also an idiot, so."
He wraps a hand in the front of Mike's shirt, drawing him down closer, and Mike smiles into it when their lips meet in a proper kiss. Will is warm, soft and hazy with interrupted sleep, and Mike can feel him smiling back as he wraps his arms around Mike's waist. Mike loves him like this, the traces of Will's feigned irritation fading away entirely as he lazily traces his tongue over Mike's lip. Mike shivers, humming happily as he wriggles closer to Will, as close as he can physically get as he presses him gently into the pillows.
"Knew you missed me," Mike mumbles against Will's lips, and Will laughs, breaking the kiss as he presses his forehead against Mike's.
"Maybe a little," he admits, voice laced with amusement as his lips brush Mike's another time. "Dork."
"Knew it," Mike says, grinning triumphantly and finally deeming it appropriate to free Will from his crushing embrace as he flops over onto his back, head lolling to the side to smile lazily at his boyfriend. Will rolls his eyes but stays close anyway, scooting under Mike's outstretched arm and resting his head on his shoulder. He hums softly, reaching up to card a hand through Will's hair and pressing a kiss to the crown of his head.
"So how was prom, anyway?" Will asks quietly, fingers tracing a gentle pattern over Mike's chest. "Besides it being boring and lame and full of drunk teenagers?"
Mike laughs. "I didn't say it was boring. Or lame."
"I know," Will hums, "I'm saying it. Boring and lame and definitely not worth missing precious hours with your boyfriend."
"For sure," Mike agrees, which is entirely true, because as much as he had enjoyed watching the kids dance together and definitely not feeling at all bitter about never going to his own, he'd mostly spent the whole time thinking about Will. Which was maybe a given, considering the specifically engineered romantic environment, and Mike thinks about Will all the time even in normal environments, but still. "It was sweet," he says thoughtfully, staring up at the ceiling and feeling the soft motion of Will's breathing against him. "The kids were happy."
Will grunts noncommittally. "It's all fake."
"I know, but they're- it's just nice," Mike huffs, and Will tucks a smirk away against his neck, "I know you agree with me."
"No," Will huffs immediately, and then, almost immediately, "Well. Maybe."
As much fun as goading Will is, Mike knows where the resistance comes from, and a bittersweet sort of feeling settles in his gut as he presses another kiss to Will's forehead. "Hey, are you free tomorrow night?" he asks, nudging Will's chest with his shoulder.
Will tilts his head back to look at him, frowning. "Um. Thought we were watching Star Wars again?"
Mike laughs. "Sure, we can still do that. But I was wondering if you wanted to have- a make-up prom."
Will stares at him for a solid thirty seconds. Then he coughs, blushes, and looks away. "You're an idiot," he says, which means I love you more than life itself, and Mike grins, tucking his face in beside Will's. "Go to sleep already."
"Oh-kay," Mike hums teasingly, kissing his temple gently, "The offer stands, though. Eight PM. Living room. Whatever dumb music you want."
"Sleep, Michael," Will repeats, voice muffled as he talks into Mike's t-shirt. Then, quieter, low enough to give the impression that he thinks Mike can't hear even though they both know he can, "I'll be there."
Mike smiles.
#11 - welcome home kisses#this rly got away from me sorry anon#didn't mean for the prom thing to be so big#it was also. loosely based on that one episode of modern family. w mitchell's promposal. iykyk#not that anyone cares but#anyway#byler ficlet#mike wheeler#will byers#st fic
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one thing about me is if i find it funny i will fully commit to a bit idc
#like one irl friend will do it with me but she has the same kind of brainrot lowkey but also i like reactions sometimes so ill just commit#thats on being ignored as a kid unless i was being over the top n then still ignored sometimes#i just think reactions r amusing it doesnt always have to be the one i want either as long as i get one bc ill get the one i want eventually#....im mentally ill n will not b fixing it <3#remembering watching a streamer talk about how she does bits at bars just to see reactions n dad was like weird thats psycho behavior n#i was like ....no it makes perfect sense she does that its strangers so they give the best reactions if u get them 2 react#ive said some unhinged shit knowing someone was listening just so see them react my fav was turning being touched as a kid into a rly bad#joke n i got a reaction bc i committed....i should not have committed but it was funny or the time i was like whats the worst thing#that happens if we go to the park at night rn what i get assaulted again 2day? once that one made someone walk away from us which was wanted#i wasnt having a good day clearly n didnt have a good like 3 months after
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when i was in highschool one o my biggest coping mechanisms was drawing all the kids i hated getting killed and eaten and killed. and well. time is a slowly ascending spiral. you will find patterns.(i work as a blackjack dealer. gamblers are FASCINATING
#cw blood#luckys original content#ITS SMALL BUT ITS ART SO IT GOES ON THE ART BLOG#also wwaooooww its meee its my lil persona!!! i dont draw myself enough....#anyway i have bigger things in the works. im slowly but surely chipping away at a pd thumbnail for that pd thumbnail project#FINALLY COLORING. BUT COLORING IS SO HARD AND I HAVNT BEEN IN THE COLORING MOOD#SO IVE JUST BEEN MAKING RLY DUMB COMICS INSTEAD... OOPS..#idk if anything finished n polished will be posted here anytime soon. BUT i post wips of everything on my twitter#and i post jrwi exclusive wips on my slucky blog. you may look at those if u have Truck Art Wishdrawls. as many do. as many do#THIS BLACKJACK JOB IS RLY AWESOME BTW DONT GET ME WRONG#i work three 12-hour days ina row. i gotta take an hourlong bus up to the depths o the mountains and then#i get to stay in this delightful lil hotel that was built in an ooold hospital. its a whole casino town. and an OLD one at that#ITS GORGEOUS HERE. last week my bus home was delayed for 2 hours#so i finally got the chance to head to other casinos and try drinkin n gambling. lost ten bucks to a pretty girl. NOT the first time#i rlly wanna try it again!!! i love interracting w ppl and i love being inebriated in public bc im just so sweet and pleasant and friendly#and pretty girls LLOOOOVEE MEEEEE i think i just need to go to gay bars more#but theres fucking NONE HERE. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im collectin comrade queers up here tho#we wanna make a Group but we just gotta come up witha name first. i need something weird and strange#yknow i remember being in highschool. and being miserable n unmedicated. my mommas ultimatum was that;#if i dont drop out of highschool; i dont need to move out. she probably wouldntve kicked me out anyway bc my mommas sweet like that but#she REALLY wanted me to graduate. and i remember dreading that i might never do that#i remember feeling like the Resident Idiot. sweet but so so fucking dumb. it took me 7 years of strife n stress before i finally graduated#i remember worrying back then that i might not ever be able to handle myself out there. that i'd be too dependant on others#AND HERE I AM. DID U KNOW I WAS LOOKIN AT HOUSES A WHILE AGO? IM AN ADULT AND IM WWINNINNNGGGGGGG#IM RUNNING OUTA ROOM BUT HERES MY ADVICE TO YOU. BC I KNOW UR FUCKING SCARED TOO. THE ONE THING THAT SAVED ME.#THAT KEPT ME FROM SINKING INTO DESPAIR IS REMEMBERING ONE THING: ITS LITERALLY JUST LIKE VIDEO GAMES#MOST PPL YOU CAN JUST WALK UP TO N ASK A QUESTION N THEYLL ANSWER. THEYRE ALL NPCS THEYRE NOT REAL#LIKE IF U WALK INTO A BANK AND ASK HOW A DEBIT CARD WORKS THEY WILL HELP YOU#AND IF YOU THINK THEY HAVE ULTERIOR MOTIVES RELATING TO MONEY. YOU CAN ASK THE CUSTOMERS TOO. ITS JUST LIKE VIDEO GAMES#ANYWAY STAY SAFE KIDS HAVE FUNNNNN. IM GOING TO GO DO DRUGS NOW. HOPE U CAN DO DRUGS SOON TOO. I LOVE YOU
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yeah I'm not gonna talk abt it am I...
#well thats okay. eventually itll come up naturally. and if not well. it doesnt make me feel very okay. but its not a big deal#and i guess ill meet ppl in the future who will curate a different idea of me and maybe therell be fewer misunderstandings#<- coward who CAN communicate to save their life but not in any lower stakes situation for their happiness n quality of life#we <3 repression n insecurity. maybe if i keep digging at the corner of this bit of the labyrinth with my spoon ill get out someday 😌#anyway.. theres my daily vague vent post got it out of my system#wanted to do it earlier but ended up not having much time after work n then called friends which was nice :^)#also i never have signal at work these days.. my boss has said shell get me on the staff wifi tho cuz i do need it for work reasons#its rare to need it for work purposes bc we all use work pcs n stuff anyway and not rly supposed to use mobiles in the lab#but yeahh.. god i have so much admin shit to sort out also gotta text family back before i sleep i forgot to earlier#its all good.. also my memory foam pillows turned up so i no longer have to steal my roomies extra one for my neck pain <3#ik she was missing it... not to sound like a creep but it was nice that it smelled like her a little. just familiar innit#we're always around each other so its just what being home smells like to me.. listen i have a sensitive nose 😔✋️#if we were a lot closer i would ask if i could sleep in her bed while shes away but we're not so it would come across sooo weird..#and i would feel rly weird abt someone sleeping in my own room without me there. well maybe not actually. as long as they werent snooping#<- guy whose mother used to go thru their shit all the time n struggles to not feel paranoid and distrustful when it comes to privacy#was thinking recently my ideal living situation w a partner would be separate rooms but we still share the bed sometimes#but not every night bc im a sensitive sleeper... but we can switch bedding so i can still smell them if i wake up in the night alone#like how new mothers trying to get babies used to cot sleeping each have a cloth or blanket and swap every night#so the baby is comforted by the blankets smell and sleeps more peacefully.. and momma finds it easier being apart from the baby too#sorry this is getting gooey and weird my meds have been wearing off the last couple hours im so sleeppyyyy 😭#well.... maybe everything can wait until tomorrow..... bed is calling..#goodnight everyone muah#.diaries
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hello captive audience. have we considered cowherd and weaver girl nobamaki au
#riko.txt#nobamaki#nobamaki lends itself RLY well to all sorts of aus. orpheus and eurydice also 👀👀👀#anyway maki is the weaver and nobara is the cowherd but i’m putting a spin on it#idk how the clothes thing will go but you know the version where the sisters joke that the cowherd’s proposal is the best she’ll get#maybe it’s maki’s idea. maybe one of her relatives cracks a joke about her marrying whatever mortal happened across them#and maki (expert at pissing off her relatives) goes. you know what would be funny#maybe it’s not even initially romantic on purpose. anyway this got away from me and it’s no longer an au so much as ‘inspired by’#but i digress
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(muth being music theory!)
#FUCK IT MY OWN EDITION OF THE ODDLY SPECIFIC POLLS BC THESE ARE FUN#me when i've been obsessed with space/time stuff since i was a KID its more an interest than hyperfixation rn but man.#media with any of those?? i am OBSESSED (star wars rottmnt movie etc etc) like i hyperfixated on dr who for a year in middle school#the skateboard one is so funny. in high school my guard instructor saw me with a friend's pennyboard & immediately said no.#me when i was notoriously clumsy in middle + high school so everyone i knew was like. “this is a bad idea” when i did anything#my first semester of college i bought a longboard off someone then 5months later i turned around & ate SHIT it was so funny in retrospect#anyway fun sage lore i have only ever heavily injured the left side of my body. my knee + elbow and the SAME FUCKING TOOTH. TWICE.#also i have a high pain tolerance. like idk how or when but in middle school it just got Really Strong. me when i injure myself and just#live with it for a year before it becomes a concern and i get told to get an xray (i will live with a fractured knee the rest of my life)#also when i fell off my skateboard and ate shit my first concern was “ah fuck my glasses did i break my nose” and#“nah my elbow isnt broken! my arm is just rly sore from how i landed on it” (readers. it was in fact fractured.)#like i literally went “no im fine we dont need to tell my mom or go to the er” and my friends said “call your mom and go to the er”#me spitting out my tooth and blood bc i also busted my lip: that hurt. time to hobble back to my dorm.#anyway hiding this one in the tags bc i will never not just ignore my issues LMAO did it with my ptsd dx and i will continue to do it#another incredibly hyperspecific thing: oh this doesnt seem normal! im gonna ignore it and hope it goes away#these symptoms match up to something? nah i'm sure it's not that! (proceeds to get dx'd with ptsd five months later)
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😶🌫️
#finally got some more incense from my uncle and immediately burned a hole in my brand new curtains#im not very bright am i#i thought like 'hmm. is it too close to the curtain' as i set it down and still just let it be there#it doesnt RLY bother me but like come onnn i got the curtains like this week!!#my uncle gave me a bunch of ones he had and since they didnt have labels ive been just kind of testing which ones smell good#and this one didnt so i thought ok ill let it burn up next to the window so it doesnt stink up the whole place#shoulda just watered it and tossed it away.... oh well#complaining here since its too stupid and small of a thing and my fault to complain about to any real person#anyway i also got jasmine incense and omg. it smells so good#ive always thought jasmine smells like intoxicating its so strong and so like strangely sweet#so good would recommend#i have jasmine tea too but either it doesnt taste like much or im bad at making it#smells great tho!#my post
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last few hours in boston :(
#purrs#conference tag#we literally just got here and now we have to go 😭💔 i havent rly felt as enriched by this conference as i have in the past (though there’s#still 2 more sessions to go to incl the closing plenary and we’re getting lunch in the station before the train ride home) but ive walked#around so much and have spent time with people i love and some people i miss. and have been on adventures i have been looking forward to for#a rly long time though i am kinda bummed i never made it down to fanueil square. but… idk what happiness feels like anymore but maybe for me#it’s just absence of misery and despair. or contented ness. i have gotten a little triggered from time to time these last few days and ive b#been lonely in my hotel room but MAN it has been nice to not be miserable and suffering and to take walks and to not go to every session (ev#even though i do feel bad abt it like i missed 2 plenaries and an afternoon concurrent session which is more than i usually miss) and to#be in this city which feels so much like brighton and so uncity like in some ways. it’s so charming and omg i went to harvard and it was#NOTHING like what i imagined it to be / feel like.. just a quaint artsy quirky town. and the rest of the places ive been have been like that#too. and people LIVE here every day!!!!! there’s a big beautiful world here both above ground and below!!!! and im gonna be late to#breakfast but… i just feel nourished and healed in a way i wasn’t expecting to. I haven’t been this far away from home in 3+ years and#it’s just been really nice being somewhere else and going on adventures and seeing things surviving. i miss my grandparents a lot and im sad#to not be visiting them and to be unable to visit them now lol but it’s just rly nice and special being here. im goingto miss it so much and#im trying to savor every second. i wish we had one more day here and im a little sad to be going home lol#* what i meant when talking about happiness earlier is that i think… i have been happy these last few days. for the first time in a really#really long one. and that’s nice. it’s good to be happy again. and good to be here
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right at the beginning of music school is actually a fantastic time to think "really when was the last time making music or working with music made me happy?"
#don't worry about me this is just my bi-weekly crisis regarding school and my future and my entire identity haha yea i'm fine i'm cool#i'm frustrated bc i haven't actually made progress with music in so long and i haven't made anything i'm proud of for even longer#i'm studying music technology but i don't know shit about it and really i'm not that passionate about it either#there are so many projects that i have in the works that i actually do have to finish bc they're for other people but i just#can't get myself to work on it#my entire life i've been so fucking bad with comparing myself to others#and going to music school i am now surrounded by talented people left and right and i feel so fucking inferior#and i'm one of those people who never studied in school and well that's not rly an issue bc at this school u don't study the traditional way#however what this also means about me is that nothing has ever been difficult for me before and#i simply don't know how to cope with not knowing how to do something#i mean this isn't the first time that i don't know how to do something but#this is the first time that i can't just run away from it and ignore it#and i feel like i'm never gonna be able to graduate from here#i've literally had just two days of school so far and i'm convinced i can't do it#to be fair i was already convinced i'm a failure and a fraud before i started so#also during the first introduction lecture to the school. burnout got mentioned. very. very. very many times.#i'll let you guys know when it gets to me haha#i'm feeling good i'm feeling so good i'm feeling fine [crying my eyes out]#eg posts
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ok yknow what. i honestly think the reason a decent amount of mainstream autism rep has historically been bad isn't because it's. like. wholly unrealistic yk. it's because a) that's ALL most rep boils down to which gives allistic ppl who don't do research or whatever a good chance of thinking that IS autism instead of just a simplified version of one of the many ways someone on the spectrum might be and b) even when it's an accurate-ish way of how someone might exist it's constantly treated as either a joke or a morally bad thing. like.
as someone who definitely to some extent falls under the Emotionally Detached Low Empathy Guy Who Is Smart And Likes Science And Toys And Overanalyzes Social Interactions trope. it would be nice to a) see more than JUST that in media. just bc autism has been historically diagnosed way more in men does not mean every autistic person is smartass mcwhiteboy. and b) when it is depicted this way, see it as smth other than demonized. yknow. obviously sheldon cooper is the first thing that comes to mind. but it's the combination of horribly oversimplifying someone to a bunch of stereotypes and then taking things that might feel more like a person having experiences and turning them into bad things, either by having em pointed out by other characters as such or using narrative framing & a laugh track to do the job. low empathy? yeah that character is unfeeling and cold or something. and also super arrogant and selfish because the autistic tendency to put others' issues in terms of your own experience totally isn't someone doing their best to relate to you and offer comfort. they just only care about themself.
and it goes on and on and on and on! nobody wins. people who don't relate at all to a specific portrayal just don't get any representation, i guess! and those who do identify with some ways autism manifests itself in a character get to see it constantly belittled.
#anyways. i might rearticulate this later bc i have more to say. but i wanted to quick get it out now yk#and for the record. i love abed from community. i think he's some of the best mainstream rep i've seen and i really really like how they-#-handled him as a character. i feel really seen thru him yknow??#but anyways this whole thing got me started w christopher from that one mark haddon book.#which obv the way he approached christophers autism is. not great much like how other media does bc that way they can#get away w not having full responsibility for autism portrayal by claiming an obviously autistic character is not autistic#but i digress.#anyways. i think a lot of things christopher said rly resonated and tho some things were definitely stereotypical like? i still enjoyed him#-on the whole. and to see ppl. especially allistic ppl. just saying he's annoying and stuff and then listing all his symptoms as reasons-#-they just absolutely hate him? girl. ur not cute for that one.#is he perfect rep? no. should all rep look like him? also no. but that is absolutely an undiagnosed autistic teenager#.woof.
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[@distinguished-turtle-enjoyer ]
i actually have not stopped thinkin bout your bb!edit like,,,, its so good and scratches my brain right
how long have you been doin edits for? do have any tips for someone, who hypothetically, wants to start doin edits too? what programs do you use? how did you do the cool animated bits?
im so sorry for all the qustions 😭😭 i just think youre very talented and inspirational and i hope you have a good day ^_^
hi firstly oh my gosh you're literally so sweet i am gently shaking you i love you so much /p. secondly, i apologize for the long answer! (it's all under the cut. this got away from me. i'm so sorry apparently i have a lot to say.) (also you're so good about the questions i would constantly be asking one of my professors questions during class to the point where she said i didn't have to go "i have a question" every time i approached her)
i've been editing since 2016! around march/april, i think? loved it so much i went into film & video production in college as a major so i could do editing for a living. (i have done more motion graphics for my classmates than i have done edits outside of class assignments, BUT!)
the program i use is after effects - i started learning it when covid first hit the united states because i had nothing better to do with my time (other than music theory but i failed that bc my professor focused more on the history aspects than the actual theory soooo) and my ipad kept giving me the "no more storage" whenever i tried to use videostar lmao. (vs has, apparently, gotten a LOT of good updates, so if you're looking to start editing and have an ios system, i'd look into it! only downside is you have to pay for some of the cool stuff).
also the program i use for masking (i think i explain this later dwdw) is superimpose. i've been using it since 2014 and it's SO nice bc i can use my fingers to erase backgrounds & stuff instead of hoping i can get it to work correctly in ae or photoshop (photoshop my DETESTED i'll use it but i'll complain the entire time).
for people who want to start editing: tutorials on how your program works and how to do specific transitions are gonna be your best friend when you're first figuring things out! i forced a friend to literally walk me through how after effects worked when i was first figuring it out, and when i had swapped to videostar back in 2017/2018(?) i had watched a Lot of tutorials. that and played around a lot and figured things out on my own - which is also always a good way to start!! it's also totally valid to look at other people's edits for inspiration - most editors don't really care, as long as you don't flat-out remake their edit (some people don't like that!). i have a style insp folder on instagram where i save edits that i like so if i need transition ideas or i'm doing a different style, i can look there for inspiration. at the end of the day, as long as you're having fun with it that's all that matters!
also, starting simple is always okay!! my edits for a year were just me slapping gifs & video segments together on a timeline in cute cut pro bc imovie didn't load them lol & it'd crash every time i breathed. ++ it never hurts to ask people for feedback/constructive(!!!) criticism/etc! (also not to sound like everyone else but practice? good. it's so good. if i showed my 14/15y/o self some of the edits i can make now they would've passed out on the spot bc i was still trying to figure out transitions back then. programs can also sometimes make a difference in edits, but usually it's not super noticeable until you start getting to the Complicated Shit.)
a lot of popular programs i've seen are ones like video star (ios only), alight motion (android only), after effects (i recommend 🏴☠️ing it tbh, i only use it legally bc i had to use adobe programs for school), capcut, and i think some people still use sony vegas pro & maybe cute cut pro (i've heard it may have actually gotten better since i last used it in 2018)? i have no idea. programs also depend on whatever device you're using to edit on! since i've been using my laptop, i'm able to use after effects (it's computer-only), but when i used my phone/ipad to edit i used ccp & vs.
for the animation - it's a lot of cutting up the image and masking! more complex animations, like the one i had of leo walking down that red 'hallway' have several different layers that have been masked. (i removed the background & filled in the spot where leo originally was in two different apps - superimpose (taking leo out) & photoshop (filling in the bg)) in after effects, the way i've done this was mask out the specific thing i wanted to move (like an eye) and then put that mask on what i've called a "base" (not animated), and then stick a solid behind the base to match the color of the object. (some of my layers are not named appropriately; base 2 is the left arm & the four "SIX_[...]" layers are the mask/bandana tails)
an example of this would be for any of the eye blink animations i did! this (above) is the same shot, with and without the eye - since it's masked out and i have the background solid behind it, it doesn't look too unnatural/have a black outline/mass where his eye should be.
what it looks like without the solid layer behind it ^ (the red lines are from the null layers - ignore that)
this is what my timeline looks like if it's a more simplistic animation - the only five things being animated here are leo & raph's eyes. (there's only this many layers bc it's two characters in one shot & i was also animating their pupils - typically, an eye-blink animation is about 4-6 layers for me (solid, base, mask, & null to animate with, 6 if i'm animating both eyes & 4 if just one))
in after effects, there's this really cool tool called the puppet pin that one of my friends (lovingly) yelled at me for not knowing about - which. yeah fair she wasn't wrong it's SUPER useful in animating, provided you chop up your image first. if you don't it's a mess.
(separated by layer vs i should've really put the mask tails & leo's head on separate layers and didn't bc that was the 2nd to last animation i had to do and i was losing my mind bc i wanted to be done with the edit lmao)
the way people animate depends all on their style (there's two common ways to do blinking animation - having the anchor point at the bottom of the eye, or the middle of it) and the program they use. it's been a while, but i could probably tell you how to do some basic animations on videostar still even though i've been doing them in after effects for about 2-3years now. ALSO the best way to have an animation be noticeable is to over-exaggerate it/make them Big - which, yes, can mean 'breaking bones' and having the limbs be a little wonky at the start. (if you want it to be realistic though go Just to the point where it looks uncomfortable lmao)
uhm. again i am so sorry that this is so long i THINK this is everything? if not: my inbox/dms are always open if you ever want to ask more questions, wanna follow up on something, etc etc!! (also if you ever start editing please send me your edits!!! i'd love to see them <3)
#this got away from me im SO sorry (just put this in google docs out of curiosity. 1255 words. i am so sorry for the essay.)#uhm. ANYWAY YES like i said if you have any other questions feel free to reach out!!! i am always alway willing to help people out#with stuff like this!!! i can talk your ear off though if this wasn't enough proof of that /j#if nothing makes sense it's bc i'm responding to this at like. 5am my time. so. my bad if there's typos i'm so sorry#like i think i saw this ask at 4:40ish am and i'm still making sure i've got everything covered and its like 5:32am LMAO#me when i dont sleep bc i have no routine now#ask box pals#art creds in the screenshots to trubblegumm !! <- tagging to be safe#still in shock at the amount of positive feedback im getting from my bb!leo edit like oh my god you guys are incredible ilysm /p#sorry i discovered in the middle of typing out my tags that you can edit them now after you've hit enter where am i.#also this is offtopic so its down here but i am Not complaining about doing more motion graphics than actual editing.#a bitch has won two awards for their motion graphics at festivals and i've been doing them for a YEAR#(laughs in the first time i ever did a real one i won a student award. idk how. but i DID and i won the pro category this year <3)#it would be nice tho to do more editing for short films tho :( had a professor tell me i was good at it.#i should rly start using my camera and shoot my own stuff and edit it huh. maybe i will eventually i have a few ideas.#anyway. i need to stop rambling abt my experience as a film student and go to bed i apparently need to be up in the morning but idk WHEN
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