#THIS NEEDS TO BE PEER REVIEWED PLEASE AND THANKS

[helaelaemond]

pls grace us with a ranking of the ewan mitchell characters from best fuck to worst fuck

enquiring minds NEED to know

ok well you need to reblog this with what YOU think too!

From best to worst in my opinion in terms of what I think they're like in bed, and how they'd meet my needs:

Osferth (always learning, always improving, tender and kind, adaptive, appreciates respite in the middle of a good pounding sesh, easy to laugh with when things don't go to plan)

Billy W (pussy eating champ three years in a row, whimpers, surprisingly good soft dom when he's in the right mood)

Aemond (Helaena taught him well, can be rough and possessive, can be gentle and adoring depending on which side of insane he is at any given time)

Michael (gets better over time, terrified of what's between a woman's thighs for the longest time. Quick learner but gets frustrated when he doesn't get it right the first time. Character most likely to induce awkward pauses that can be difficult to recover from)

Abraham (huge daddy energy, might not last long himself but can go for rounds and rounds and rounds until you're done too, definitely would spit in your mouth and make you swallow - bonus points in my book)

Tom (doesn't know the complexities of making a woman come, so whilst it is a fun experience, he'd probably assume the female orgasm is a myth and if he doesn't make you come, he doesn't think that it's his fault. Still fun to fuck)

Ettore (assuming its consensual, he probably still does wild things without asking, just following whatever he wants to do. Selfish, too aggressive when fingering, bites when he goes down)

Genyen/Sean (doesn't wash his foreskin, thinks doggy is the best position, thinks aggressively pulling hair is sexy, watches way too much porn to have a realistic understanding of sex)

[hauntingofhouses]

OH I was JUST talking to @fuukonomiko about this the other day!

Basically it's my reading of this that Mizu saw themself as the man on the right (who is clean-shaven, more youthful/feminine and softer in appearance, resembling a wakashu, and also more similar in appearance to Mizu themself).

That would then put Taigen in parallel with the man in the middle (who, it's important to note, is a samurai whose skills Mizu had admired and been impressed by, earlier in this same episode; and this is notable because in the episode right before this, Mizu genuinely complimented and admired Taigen's swordsmanship in a similar way).

So in this scene, the samurai (Taigen) turns away from kissing a woman (possibly paralleling Akemi), to instead kiss the man on the right (Mizu).

Seeing this, Mizu is reminded of their own desires and attraction towards Taigen, thus implying that Mizu sees a chance that Taigen would want them the same way that samurai wants the wakashu-like man.

Thus, in conclusion: gay samurais, your honour ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

what did they mean by this?

[the-mike-est-of-michaels]

as in would it seem to self promoting idk I have social anxiety

[starvail]

wdym i have a head dent?!

narumi gen / gn!spouse!reader

synopsis : "narumi gen is highly respected in his own division, with every officer following him with determination and every platoon leader dyeing their hair like him as a sign of respect."

content : only crack, fluff, gender neutral reader, reader works in jakdf, a few flashbacks, a little bit more on the lore side, the word beautiful is used to describe the reader, shinonome's age is just a guess, mostly shinonome pov, narumi should have his own warning fr, vice captain and platoon leaders are tired.

words : 1.7k

a/n : you can’t convince me that this man hasn’t went out on a mission with a head dent at least once-

part two of 'a cheers to our youth'

She remembers years ago, newly turned twenty, and nervously standing in front of your desk, arms crossed behind her back, posture rigid.

This would be the first time she will be meeting you in person, rather than listening to your demands through a communicator.

Now is the time to make the best lasting first impression. To prove that she is capable of handling things much bigger than an ordinary officer.

"Thank you very much for deeming me worthy of a rank review! I will not let you down!"

"Don't thank me for something as trivial as just a chance of a promotion. I know you'll do well in the future, Shinonome. The person you really need to impress is the First Captain."

You do not look up from your paperwork, and though many will see this as quite cold and rude, she's heard from numerous people that you simply do not have the time to entertain anything or anyone else within working hours.

The fact that you even spared a one-on-one meeting with her was an honour, and Shinonome will forever respect your dedication. Unfortunately, her lips move to articulate her thoughts before she could stop herself.

"I aspire to contribute to the Defence Force as much as you and Captain Narumi, Head! Please wait for me!" She slaps a hand over her mouth.

Stopping your editing to the paper before you, you look up at her in surprise at her outburst. Shinonome is swift in attempting to correct her statement.

"Uhm...! I did not mean it in that way, Head. A-Apologies for speaking out of line. I'll commence however many push ups-"

"Hahaha!" You made no move to hide your mirth and Shinonome does not know whether to be concerned or relieved at your reaction.

She curses at herself. Dammit, well done, Rin. You definitely made a lasting first impression alright. Great, now Head is gonna see you as a clown vying for their hand.

"No need for the push ups. I appreciate your passion, Shinonome. However, I am already married, so I will have to decline." It seems that you will not let her forget this. How cruel...

Wiping a forming tear at the edge of your eye, you sigh lightheartedly. "It's a good thing that you didn't say that to your Captain or else his head would blow up bigger than it already is!"

By now, the officer is bright red at her blunder before your words catch up to her. Wait, married...? Weren't you only a year or two older than her? Is she already falling behind her peers in yet another department?!

And though she does not say her thoughts aloud this time, you seem to be able to read her befuddled face too well. You hold up your hand and lift two fingers up like a peace sign, a soft smile adorning your own face.

At that moment, Shinonome realises that you are much friendlier in person compared to when you are communicating with Captain Narumi.

During missions, it was like listening to dogs fighting.

"I am two or three years older than you, I think, If I remember reading your files correctly. I just got married really young so don't worry too much about finding love or whatnot for now. Live in the present and all that." You wave off casually.

"If I may be so bold to ask..." Shinonome only now notices the metal band that you adorn around your fourth finger and shyly looks at her own twiddling bare fingers.

"Hm? Go ahead." Your focus is still on her.

"What age did you get married?"

"Eighteen."

"?!"

You burst back into laughter when Shinonome's composed and seemingly nonchalant persona crumbles and she is left there dumbfounded.

A feint 'don't mind' playfully slips out as you excuse yourself to deliver your now finished papers and pat her shoulder on your way to the door.

Shinonome finds that you will truly not let her live down her moment in your office.

Even months later, after she was proven competent and promoted to Platoon Leader. Be it during a mission, passing each other in the corridor, or in a meeting.

("Platoon Leader Shinonome, please wait for me in my office after this." / "Shinonome, please wait for the arrival of new equipment sent over by...." / "Ah, Rin. Thanks for waiting for me, traffic was atrocious today!" All of those interactions being followed by a knowing smirk.)

Despite this, the two of you have grown closer, more casual. Dare she say that the two of you were even friends.

She learnt that you are married to the Narumi Gen and that you have known him since you were children (she had always assumed those endearments he torments you with during missions were a joke).

Learns you prefer drinking iced coffee rather than hot.

You only wear shoes you can very easily slip on.

You like to make edits to documents using a purple pen rather than the standard red.

You personalise your lab coats by stitching your initials and operator number to the cuffs (swearing her to secrecy, you tell her that you also stitch Captain Narumi's initials, but instead at the cuffs, it's hidden inside the pocket over where your heart is).

In spite of your seemingly intimidating work front, you are still very much human.

(Years down the line, Shinonome has well learnt that you were never scary, or aloof, or anything of the sort. She guesses your role in the Defence Force just forces you to seem like it, given your importance.)

Shinonome also learns that you and Narumi dye each other's hair.

"Oh, this?" You motion to the groupings of fresh silver highlights in your hair. The Platoon Leader had to deliver some documents and noticed the change and decided to compliment you on it, it fits you. She asks if you had it done professionally.

It looks really nice... maybe she would suit something similar?

"No, I didn't go to a salon. You think I have the money for that sort of thing?" Yes, yes you do, Head.

"I've been dyeing Captain Loser's hair since we were teenagers, and he decided while we were touching up his roots that it's been a while since we were matching and wouldn't leave me alone otherwise. I didn't get to sleep until two last night!"

You say it with such disdain that if she were a new recruit, she would think that you meant it.

But Shinonome knew you better than that, because you could never hide the adoration that shone through your irises, or the fondness in your smile.

Perhaps, one day, she will meet someone that would elicit the same reaction when talking about her...

"He wanted to do my hair without my help so now there's a chunk of under layer hair that's all silver instead of just highlights. If you look even closer, you might see just bleached bits that he forgot to colour! He botched it!"

She would be lying if she were to say she wasn’t jealous.

You are beautiful and intelligent and considerate and sincere. And though you are not physically strong, you show your strength in a plethora of other ways, your contributions named on newspapers displayed along your office walls are evident of that. Your strategies and tactics have led many to victory and the Eastern Defence Force is as strong as ever.

Truly, you and Narumi Gen are forces to be reckoned with and Shinonome could not be more thankful to be so in reach.

She does not realise she was staring at you for so long until you speak up.

"Ah! Would you like me to do your hair sometime?"

"Oi, Dumbass. Stop trying to act cool in front of the newbies."

Narumi, dramatically posing solemnly atop a fresh kaiju corpse, tilts his head back to face the flying drone's camera and shows off a smirk at the sound of your voice.

"Well, if it isn't my darling dearest, everything okay at Comms?" He waves lazily, but this seems to irk you more.

"You were playing Underwatch, when I told you not to, weren't you." You frame it as a statement, rather than a question.

Everyone in Operations and Officers around Narumi watches as their Captain's jaw drops to the floor, eyes bulging out of his skull.

He is quick to grab at the drone and shakes it wildly, as if it was a person he was trying to gouge information out of. The propellers are swift to turn off, you knew this kind of reaction was coming from miles away.

"Who snitched?!" His face is all up on the camera.

At this point, Narumi knew that it was of his best interest to admit the truth rather than make up excuses on the spot, especially if you used that tone.

But how could you have possibly found out? He even made sure to download a special VPN so you couldn't track his gameplay! Was it Hasegawa? It had to have been Hasegawa. Damn you, Hasegawa-

"Your galactic-sized head dent gave it away. Do you not have enough sense to at least fix it before you leave for duty?" You sigh on the other end of the mic, disappointment evident in your admonishment.

"Huh?"

The drone starts up again and Narumi is forced to let go as it turns to face ninety degrees away from him and projects a hologram of himself, but from his side.

Lo and behold, all of the Captain's hair is sticking straight up, as per usual when he is in combat, except for the areas at the centre of his skull, a clear band of hair matted down with a sheen of presumably sweat.

"Pfft, I hope the news articles capture this very flattering side of you! 'What a loser,' they'll all say." You do your best to cover up a snicker. The drone is now happily emoting like an actual person, tilting side to side as if it were someone's head, taunting him.

"NO!!" Narumi is on his knees, frantically trying to fix his hair while maniacal laughter resonates from the floating device.

From a distance, a certain Platoon Leader watches on, irked. Out of all of the people to admire for the power they bring to the Defence Force, out of all the people to strive to be like, why did it have to be these two?

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

All In 15

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, power imbalance, low self esteem, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: you meet a mysterious man on a night out with your sister. (petite!reader)

based on the winning option for this poll

Characters: casino owner!Bucky Barnes

Note: Okay. Back again.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

You sit up as the faucet runs, the bathroom door slightly open. You look around, searching for your own shoes, not these annoying heels. As you get up, Bucky emerges, swiping his hands over his dark hair. You gulp and stop short. You gape at his shirtless torso. 

“You going somewhere, doll?” He asks. 

“Um, yeah, home,” you tear your eyes off of him. 

“Home? It’s late.” 

“I know but... my mom...” 

“I bet she’s asleep. She won’t know the difference, doll. I can’t let you go off into the night like that,” he insists as he comes closer. 

“But I...” you scour the room for your purse. You really don’t know how you’ll explain it all to your mom. You can’t go home in this dress and makeup. “I have to--” 

“Who say? You’re an adult, aren’t ya? You can stay.” He comes close and puts his hands on your shoulders, “you’re not gonna leave me all alone, are you?” 

“Bucky, I...” you chew your lip. “I had fun...” 

“But you can’t stay and snuggle. I get it. You’re a special girl, maybe I just don’t deserve ya,” he frowns. “And I’m not gonna make you stay but I can’t let you go off alone. So let me get dressed and I’ll drive you home.” 

You look at him. Your chest tweaks. He did all this for you. He’s already half undressed for the day and you can see the fatigue around his eyes. To be honest, you’re exhausted yourself. 

“No, I can’t-- I’ll stay,” you try to smile but you’re too nervous to do more than show your teeth. 

“You don’t gotta feel sorry for me,” he scoffs. 

“Sorry for you?” You pout, “no. How could I—what would I feel sorry for?” 

His throat bobs and he looks away, “you really are a sweet girl.” 

“Bucky,” you step closer, then stop yourself. You notice the muscles in his chest. He’s so strong and big. It’s distracting. “I’m just me. I... you—you own this whole place, why would I feel bad for you? It’s not... that. I’m just...” your lashes flick and your eyes drift down to his muscled stomach. You tear them away in shame, “nervous.” 

“Nervous,” he looks at you, almost bashfully as he keeps his chin tilted down. “About what?” 

“Well, er... everything. You. I... I’m just... it’s all so new, that’s all.” You twist your hand around your finger. “I didn’t mean to... hurt you.” 

He stares at you and takes a deep breath. He stands up straight and comes closer. “Aw, doll, no. Don’t give me that face. It makes me want you even more. To show you that you don’t need to be nervous. I wanna take care of ya. That’s the deal, isn’t it? I’m gonna give you everything you could ever dream of and all I’m asking is for you to keep being sweet to me.” 

He brings a hand up to cup your chin and you shiver. His thumb rubs along the line of your jaw as you peer up at him, “come on.” 

He gently urges you toward the bed. You put your hand on his wrist and stop him. You run your touch down his forearm. 

“I can’t sleep in this,” you look down at the dress. “Too tight.” 

“Ah, you want one of mine, doll?” He chuckles and reluctantly pulls his hand away. 

He turns and strides to the closet. To your surprise, there are clothes inside. Some of them you recognise from the racks of dresses you browsed earlier. He reaches inside and takes out a black button up. He comes back to you as he slips it off the hanger. 

He hands it over and you thank him. You feel the fabric, it’s soft. It’ll be nicer than the pinch of the seams. 

“Can I unzip ya?” He rasps. You sense the tension in his voice, as if he can barely get it out. 

“Oh, sure.” 

You turn your back to him, as much to hide your own burning blush as to hide from the heat roiling from him. You wince as his thumb brushes your skin and he slowly pulls down the tab of the zipper. You quiver out your breath and clutch the bodice of the dress as it slackens. You look at him from the corner of your eye. 

His fingertips trail up your spine and he steps closer. You brace yourself. He sniffs and pulls his hand away. 

“I’ll close my eyes,” he puts his hand over his face and turns on his heel. 

You don’t move right away. His presence is like a noose. You step away from him and put the shirt on the bed. You shimmy out of the dress and swipe it quickly off the floor. You put the shirt on and button it up. You unhook your bra and slide it off one arm at a time before pulling it through it free from beneath the fabric. 

You gather up the shirt and bra and clear your throat, “you can look now.” 

He accepts your invitation eagerly. He looks at you. Nowhere else but you. As you carry the clothing to rest on the dresser, he hums. Your legs tingle as they’re exposed to the room and him. They were before but now you feel even barer. 

As he approaches, you wrench back and face him. He stops to step out of his pants and you watch him in disbelief. He has only his dark briefs left. The twitch under the fabric gives you a start. You squeak and hurry for the bed. That’s not because of you... no, but... 

He follows. You climb up just ahead of him and his weight dips beside you. You push your legs under the covers as he reaches back to flip the light switch beside the headboard. The lamp goes out and he groans as he jostles closer. 

You lay down and just as quickly you’re locked in his embrace. His warm breath fans over your cheek as he nestles in close and brushes his nose along your cheek. His hand traces up and down your side and he clutches your hip. He pulls you flush to him. You can fill him—it—moving against your thigh. 

“Doll, ain’t this nice? Just us, just snuggling,” he purrs and tucks his hand under you, hooking a leg around yours. “I wish it could last forever.” You hum, unsure what to say. He kisses your cheek and hushes your silence, “sweet dreams. Don’t think I could sleep any better than next to you.” 

🃏

Sleep shrouds you in a shallow void. You can sense everything around you. Your mind won’t let go of your strange surroundings or the man next to you. Before you open your eyes, you try to convince yourself it was all a dream. 

You open your eyes to find the truth vivid before you. Bucky entwines himself in your as he snores into your hair. His arm is hooked around you and you’re not sure you’re okay about his hand being where it is. As you squirm, he kneads your ass. 

You reach back to stop him and he growls. The sound makes your chest twinge and you arch your back as his fingers curl deeper into your soft flesh. You cling to him as he holds you close. 

“Mmm,” he drones groggily, “you’re so warm, baby.” 

He rocks his pelvis and you feel just what you did the night before. He’s hard. The realization freezes you. You gulp and put your other hand over his thigh, squeezing him through the blankets. 

“Bucky,” you squeak, “Bucky?” 

“So good,” he continues to tilt his hips in a lewd rhythm. 

You turn to look at him, pulling back to see him. You’re caught in his hold. His eyes are closed as he lays beside you. Is he asleep? 

He continues to roll into you. You don’t know what to do. You’re embarrassed and helpless. He keeps on as you babble and blink up at the hotel ceiling. He grunts and jerks, shakes, then stops altogether. You shudder. 

“Bucky,” you say louder as you writhe in his arm. 

“Mm, ugh, huh,” he mutters as you tap his shoulder frantically. “Doll, what’s--” 

You look down as you feel something wet seep through the shirt. He releases you as he leans back and lifts the blanket. He peeks down and quickly sits up. Before you can say a word, he swings his legs over the edge and stands. He storms into the bathroom and the door snaps behind him. 

You gape after him. When at last you can move, you drag the blanket away from the mattress. You look at the wet spot on your shirt and push yourself up. You’re not sure but you are sure. It can’t be anything else. You’ve heard of it happening to men in their sleep but you always thought it only happened to teens. 

The door opens and you pop your head up. Bucky comes out with a towel around his waist and his hand on his forehead, “doll. I’m so sorry. I was dreaming and...of you, of course, but I got carried away. I didn’t mean to—I didn’t realise...” he swallows and closes his eyes. He tilts his head and drops his arm, “I’m so embarrassed.” 

“Uh, oh, I... I... well, I guess it happens, right?” You can’t look at him.  

“Well, not really. I gotta be honest, I mean, after this, there’s no point lying but... this doesn’t happen to me. Not often. Not since... well, it was a while ago,” he explains. “I guess you just do that to me.” 

“Erm, oh, I... I’m sorry?” You say. 

“Sorry, doll,” he chuckles and nears the bed. “Baby,” his voice grits in his throat, “do you know the last time a woman made me feel anything? At all? You got me feeling all sort of ways,” he exhales with a quake and reaches for you. 

You look at him as he latches onto your arm. He pulls you to the edge of the bed, “come here.” 

“Bucky--” 

He forces you to your feet and wraps you up in a hug, “I mean it, doll, I’m crazy for ya. And I’m tryna be patient but... you can see, I’m struggling. Huh? Can I have a little? Please.” 

You bat your lashes and dare to look up at him. His blue eyes are blazing and his cheeks are slightly tinged pink. Your stomach is flip flopping. 

“I...” you push your lips together and swallow, “what... what exactly... um, what did you want?” 

He trembles as he brings his hand up your arm and over your shoulder. He cradles your head and lets out another purr, “can I taste it? Please?” 

“Taste?” You echo thinly. 

“Baby, you don’t gotta do nothing. Just lay back, right? It’s like kissing. Mhmm. I’ll just be doing it...” his eyes drift lower and his nose furrows as if he’s snarling, “down there.” 

��I... I never...” 

“Promise, I’ll be nice. I just wanna try it. Alright? You say stop, I’ll stop, but baby,” his nails graze your scalp, “I’m getting hard again. It hurts.” 

You stare up at him, speechless. What do you say? What can you say? You’re in this hotel with him. The reason you’re there and could just as easily be the reason you’re not. And he’s you’re only way home. 

All of this, the room, the casino, last night, it’s all because of him. He gives and gives and you don’t see how you can keep taking. You squeeze your thighs together as they tingle. 

“Okay,” you whisper. 

“Okay?” He twitches. 

You nod as your eyes flit back and forth, “er, what... what do I do?” 

He exhales and puts his hands on your shoulders as he parts. He guides you back to the bed until your thighs meet the side, “you just sit, doll.” He shoves you down until you’re on the mattress, “I’ll do the rest.” 

You keep your eyes straight. Your body’s all locked up. You can’t move. He gets on his knees and moves toward you. He reaches under the shirt and grabs onto your panties. He tugs. 

“Help me out, baby,” he growls. 

You lift yourself slightly, just until he gets them past your bottom. You fall back down heavily. You’re buzzing in disbelief. He rolls your panties down your legs and off your ankles. He flings them away. 

He pulls your knees apart and you squeak as cool air grazes along your exposed cunt. He bends forward and kisses your thigh. You squeal. 

“Baby, I promise, I’ll be nice,” he speaks against your skin, his warm sweat smearing up your leg, “just be good. Be good for me, baby.” 

He shoves his head under the shirt and you exclaim as his tongue swipes up your cunt. You slap your hand against his head and thrash. He reaches back to hold your hand against his hair and buries his face into you. He hums and flicks his tongue. It sends a thrill through you. 

Your toes curl and your muscles strain. He keeps his tongue moving, and you push your head back as you lean your pelvis into him. Oh, wow.  

[luveline]

hi jade! if you wouldn’t mind, could i please request something and hotch with a partner who’s a little emotionally closed off? like who’s kind of blunt and off putting but around him they’re a little gentler than usual, if that makes sense? thank you!

thanks for requesting ♡

“I don't think so,” you're saying, little inflection nor emotion in your words, “I don't suppose it's very appropriate. I'm going to go now.” 

Hotch hears stammering and then your footsteps, unhurried up the steps and across the landing to his office. You knock on his ajar door and wait for him to say, “Come in,” before crossing the threshold. 

“Can you peer review this for me, please?” you ask. 

Hotch puts his pen in the holder to look at you. He doesn't mind saying to himself that you're his sweetheart (quite enjoys it, actually) and that you look nice today, as you always do, though there's nothing in particular about you that would make it so. You're cute at a baseline. He'd tell you if you weren't at work. 

He honestly still considers it. “Of course,” he says, putting out his hand. You pass the folder. 

Peer review is supposed to be done by your peers, and you're past the freshness that requires them so often, but if Hotch hadn't spent as long as he did reviewing your case input, you wouldn't be as close as you are. He doesn't mind checking it over. You stand in front of his desk and set about neatening up the small mess he's made without comment. 

“What's not very appropriate?” he asks finally. 

“What do you mean?” you ask, turning the handle of his coffee mug toward him. 

He pauses to write a comment in the margin of your work. You smile as he looks up, a small, apprehensive thing. 

“A minute ago, you told someone something was inappropriate.” 

“Peter asked me on a date.” 

Hotch feels his eyebrows rise of their own accord. “Right.” 

“He wanted to go see a concert together. Like, a rock band. He's someone's dream guy, I'm sure.” 

He laughs at the accidental slight. You don't react, straightening a pen in the holder and stepping back, satisfied at a job well done. “It's not inappropriate for him to ask you on a date,” Hotch says.

He's not mad, not scolding, just making conversation. He could talk to you for hours uninterrupted, but you aren't talkative unless he prompts you. 

“It's not appropriate because I'm already taken.” 

“He doesn't know that.” 

“I never said he did…” You glance at his door. There's no one coming up the stairs. “Can I come around?” 

“Mm.” He holds out his arm, quickly finishing his assessment of your work. You round the desk and step into his touch. 

“Should I have been nicer?” 

“You were perfectly civil. No need for nice.” You start to relax. Your tight shoulders drop and your hand brushes his thigh as you lean in. “You okay?” 

“I'm okay, Aaron. Today has felt very long,” you say, near murmuring. You turn your face toward his and close your eyes. 

He pulls you in snugly to his side, giving you a moment to breathe. Outside the office, a cacophony of chatter and ringing phones sounds, but here, there's little more than the quiet huff of your breath and the brush of his thumb rubbing a small circle into your blazer. 

“How are you today?” you ask, still quiet. 

“I'm okay. Thinking about buying tickets to a rock concert.” 

Your lips touch briefly to his shoulder. He can feel the heat of it on his skin, a memory rather than the real thing. 

“Do you want to come over tonight?” he asks. 

You're stopped from answering by the approach of footsteps up the stairs. You pull away and turn your gaze to his desk as Hotch picks up your folder and passes it back to you. It's completely natural, no hint of intimacy as Emily knocks the door as you'd done. 

She smiles at you both. “Hi. I'm having trouble with my payslip again and human resources won't fix it until you approve the ticket.” 

Hotch frowns. “That's not ideal.” What he means to say is, that's ridiculous. 

You thank him for the peer review and excuse yourself. Emily touches your hand as you go, asking, “You want to get lunch with me?”

“No, you like the wrong places. You can have half of my sandwich.” Hotch knows you like being her friend, and he can't help laughing at your answer. 

“The wrong places?” Emily mouths. 

He can only shrug. “They're specific.”

“That's one word for it.” 

[pprodsuga]

secrets untold (part 1) | sunghoon

summary: ever since sunghoon graduated university, he’s been working the same bothersome job without any real excitement in his life. but when you move into the apartment next to his, sunghoon’s reality is turned upside down and he finds himself running all over korea with you by his side. as he comes to learn, not everything is as it seems.

PAIRING: sunghoon x fem!reader

notes: ahhhhh. four revisions later and i’ve managed to write the best version of this story. i also made a playlist that you should definitelyyyy listen to while reading this. there’s nothing left for me to say other than i love sunghoon and i hope you enjoy. xx

SECRETS UNTOLD PLAYLIST

WORD COUNT: 24.1K

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to my lovely best friend @moonstruck-muses for helping me on my revisions, for brainstorming with me, and for being the best person i know.

consider leaving a comment (or two) and reblogging! x

warnings under the cut!

content warnings: mentions and descriptions of guns and a blood wound, violence in the form of hand-to-hand combat and gunshots, descriptions of stitches, alcohol use.

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

Just once does Sunghoon wish for something exciting in his life. 

Day in and day out, he swipes his keycard to enter the lobby of the high-rise building he calls his workplace and locates his secluded office by the back of the floor. His name sits in gold lettering, the prestigious plaque gifted to him upon his promotion a few years prior. Sunghoon’s morning begins by opening his laptop to note all of the reports he has yet to finish from the day before and checks his email for any lingering questions from clients or his co-workers. Despite his diligence, his peers aren’t and he finds himself picking up the slack more often than not. Being a financial analyst was not on Sunghoon’s bucket list of goals to achieve in his twenties. In fact, Sunghoon would rather do almost anything other than look at numbers all day and tell people what to do with them. 

If he had his way, Sunghoon would have chosen a career path less rigorous and numerical-based. He would’ve tried his hand at photography and studied the fine arts to garner a career in the editorial space, or perhaps he would use his time at university to study the history of coffee before opening his own shop in the busy city of Seoul. But his parents had other plans for him, namely to study law, medicine, or finance, and the latter of the three options seemed less boring to him. 

His years of studying lead him here, at Kim Search Group, crunching numbers that mean absolutely nothing to him. 

The glasses that sit on the bridge of his nose become bothersome after an hour of staring at his laptop. His next meeting is in twenty minutes and he’s less than pleased when he realizes his reports are on the docket. The agenda stares back at him in hard, black letters like they’re taunting him. Sunghoon thinks they mock him with the way the cursor hovers over the parts highlighted for his portion of the presentation. Nonetheless, Sunghoon acquires what he needs and heads to the meeting room. 

Everybody arrives early as usual. His boss concludes the opening remarks and lets his employees take the floor. One by one, Sunghoon’s co-workers stand in the front of the room and report their findings and other related topics from the past month. It all sounds the same to him; every person in this room looks like they could be carbon copies of one another with their suits too expensive and cologne too strong. It makes Sunghoon nauseous. Everybody here lives for everyone else instead for themselves, himself included.

“Good work, Park,” his boss tells him on the way out of the meeting room. “I grow impressed by your work ethic and capabilities everyday.” 

“Thank you, Mr. Kim,” Sunghoon says with a bow.  

“Do you think you can finish the Kang-Yoon reports by tonight? Our clients will be here first thing tomorrow morning to review before they decide on their purchase. I’d love to get them a first draft of their financial report when they come in.” 

With a tight smile, Sunghoon nods. “Sure thing. I’ll email it to you tonight.”

“I knew I could count on you,” Mr. Kim winks. He nudges Sunghoon’s arm like they’re old friends. 

By the time he gets home, it’s nearly nine in the evening. His tie sits loosely around his neck and his suit jacket is thrown haphazardly over his arm with the too-expensive briefcase his father bought him when he had been promoted. Sunghoon can’t help but scoff when he sees the dark brown leather staring back at him. 

Sunghoon lives in a quiet part of town, just on the outskirts of Seoul. His neighbors are either asleep by the time the sun goes down or busy juggling children with muffled laughter echoing in the hallways. Typically, Sunghoon expects to come home and enter his apartment lobby to be greeted by the doorman who wishes him a good night, take the elevator to the third floor, and tidy his living room while trying to undress himself in the meantime. 

Except, you’ve moved into the apartment next to his. 

Now, Sunghoon walks with excitement because he anticipates running into you when he’s on his way up. Sometimes you both arrive at the lobby together. Other times it’s you that he sees unlocking his door when he approaches. It doesn’t matter to him, though. The only good thing about working late on the weekdays is that he gets to run into you when he comes home. 

He quickly learns that you like to keep to yourself. You aren’t a loud person–not like his neighbor who lives on the other side of him–because he barely hears your footsteps and never hears you watching television. The most he’s heard is the scrape of a chair against hardwood floors. 

Above all, Sunghoon thinks you’re cute. You make his heart flutter for no good apparent reason. He’s barely spoken a word to you beyond introducing himself when you first moved in and yet he finds himself pacing his living room, wondering what kind of food you like to eat and what you do on the weekends. 

Sunghoon wishes he could come up with something witty to say to convince you to keep talking to him. But even seeing you in your well-worn clothes and tires expression on a Wednesday night is enough to leave him flustered. 

“Hey,” Sunghoon says awkwardly with a single nod in acknowledgement when he sees you standing in front of your apartment. He watches your hand halt by the knob. You turn your head to look around you and Sunghoon feels the heat creep up his neck. 

“Hi?” you say with an uptick in your voice, pointing at yourself. 

Sunghoon nods. “Hey.” 

“You already said that.” 

“Right.” He clears his throat. “I’m Sunghoon.” 

“I know. I remember you from when I moved in.” 

“O-Oh,” Sunghoon stutters. “Right, yeah. You’re right. Well, I’ll introduce myself again in case you need anything.” 

You unlock your apartment and step inside. “Duly noted. Goodnight, Sunghoon.” 

When the door locks behind you, Sunghoon closes his eyes and curses at the ceiling for being awkward around you. He swears he might’ve felt his knees buckle when he looked into your eyes and struggles to fish out his apartment keys. 

He always wishes he could say something that would convince you to stay in the hallway just a minute longer. He wants to be courageous enough to ask a question that piques your interest, so much so that he invites you back to his apartment to discuss it over a bottle of soju before you head back to your place. But Sunghoon doesn’t do any of that because he always gets tongue-tied when he realizes you’re standing before him, and because you always close the door before he can even think of something else to say to you. Sunghoon sighs in defeat and loosens his tie as soon as he steps through the threshold of his own apartment. 

He sleeps with the sound of crickets chirping outside his window. 

The following morning is the same. Sunghoon wakes up before the sun has the chance to say hello, swipes his keycard to access his office, and stares at his laptop until he’s sure his eyes will fall out of their sockets. 

While he meanders in his office with an unusually meeting-free day, Sunghoon uses his idle time to think about you. It seems as if his thoughts gravitate towards you these days, especially as he’s gathered the courage to say more than a few words every time you’re in his line of sight. He still feels that anxiety in the pit of his stomach when he sees you with your hair down after a long day, but it’s not enough to discourage Sunghoon from being as polite as he can so that you remember him as being kind. 

If he remembers correctly, you moved into the apartment next to his four months ago. Sunghoon recalls seeing a load of boxes perched by your front door and the bubbling excitement of seeing the new tenant piqued his interest. A large one was used as a door stopper and he’d noticed you carrying boxes inside one-by-one. In fact, that’s the first and only time Sunghoon recalls seeing what the interior of your apartment looked like. White, bare, and undecorated. He had offered to help but you declined on the notion that you hired movers to help bring the rest of your belongings. The two of you exchanged names and pleasantries, and when the conversation fell flat, Sunghoon settled to welcome you into the neighborhood and told you to reach out if you ever needed anything. Much to his dismay, you didn’t. 

It’s crazy for him to think about how tongue-tied he’s gotten for a complete stranger over a short period of time, even crazier because he doesn’t know the first thing about you. 

It’s gotten so bad that his friends have heard Sunghoon speak about you countless times. 

Jay and Jake are his best friends from college and the only people he talks to. Sunghoon’s career has overtaken his social life with many friendships and blooming relationships falling apart because of his commitment to work. His degree is the product of parental expectation, but his paycheck is enough to make him feel comfortable and Sunghoon likes to surround himself with people who don’t make him feel like a stoic shell of a human being. 

It seems as though Jay and Jake aren’t tired of him because they regularly include him in drinking nights and check in about his nonexistent relationship with his neighbor crush. Jay in particular is extremely vocal about having work-life balance in order to, as he puts it, “have a life for yourself before you grow old and die alone.” 

For now, however, Sunghoon is happy watching you from afar and praying that there’s a reason for the two of you to become closer. 

It’s another Tuesday night and Sunghoon is staying late again. Mr. Kim is too, so Sunghoon supposes tonight must not be all that bad if his superior has ordered takeout for himself for the late hours. Sunghoon arrives at his apartment around the same time he always does and prepares himself for a well deserved, deep slumber before he does this again tomorrow. Only, Sunghoon hopes he sees you before he’s off to dreamland.

And there you are, unlocking your apartment door. You look far too cute at nine in the evening. It’s unfair. 

“Hey,” Sunghoon calls out to you, throat far too dry to continue speaking. He pulls his keys out of his pockets to keep himself busy when he feels your eyes burning into him. 

“That’s the second time you’ve started a conversation by saying that.” Sunghoon whips his head in your direction to be met with a charming smile that seems almost playful. It’s the first time you’ve ever looked at him like this and he swears he feels his knees buckle. 

“Sorry,” he apologizes, fishing his keys out of his pocket. “I guess I’m running out of things to say after a long day at work.”

“Is it that bad?”

Sunghoon breathes out a laugh. “I’m a financial analyst. Long hours and not a lot of socializing, if you can believe it.”

“Oh,  I believe it.” You put your keys in the lock and push the door open. “Can’t say I’m a big fan of math.” 

“It all starts to look the same after a while but you get used to it. Crunching all those numbers…I feel like I’m saving the world,” Sunghoon says facetiously. 

“Well, I'm sure you’re a superhero to someone.” 

“I highly doubt it, but I appreciate your enthusiasm.” 

“I hope tomorrow is kinder,” you tell him as you walk into your apartment. “Don’t let those numbers get you down.” 

“Goodnight,” he calls after as you close the door with a friendly smile. 

Sunghoon is barely able to make it into his apartment when his cheeks start to hurt from how wide he’s stretched the lower half of his face. As he stares at your shared wall, he feels a sense of excitement and pride swell in his chest upon replaying his conversation with you over and over again. He paces in his living room with the image of your grin etched in his memory and eats a quick meal before getting ready for bed. 

Sunghoon sleeps with a smile on his face. 

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

When the weekend approaches, Jay and Jake accompany Sunghoon to a bar across from his apartment on a rare Friday night at eight o-clock on the dot.

For the first time in a long while, Sunghoon leaves his office right on time with no prospect of having to work later in the evening or on the weekend. His friends convince him to go to the dive bar and celebrate his early dismissal with a drink or two. Sunghoon doesn’t remember the last time he saw them so casually like this because he’s either still at the office or too tired to agree to their plans. 

Each of them have at least two drinks in their system. The bar food is starting to digest and the chips are a little too stale for Sunghoon’s liking but Jay and Jake don’t seem to mind as they keep shoveling them into their mouths in between conversations. The two of them seem far too energetic for Sunghoon to keep up and the exhaustion from the past week is finally catching up to him. 

“Work has been killing me,” Jake groans while clutching his beer bottle. “You know how I just passed my two-year mark at the Seoul Research Center? Well, my boss assigned me an apprentice who’s interning for the semester and he’s just not cut out for this kind of stuff. I have to remind him about basic protocol every single time we work together.” 

“That blows,” Jay says. 

“I babysit him more than I do my actual work and I’ve been going in on Saturdays to finish my work. My boss told me not to fuck this up because this kid is apparently the son of one of the investors and plans to work here full time after he graduates college. This is gonna blow up in my face, guys. I just know it.” Jake sighs. “But what about you both? What have you been up to?”

“Some idiot misfiled a bunch of expense reports and I’m responsible for managing them.” Jay rolls his eyes and slumps back in his seat. “I’m good at my job, I know I am. I bring in clients like it’s nobody’s business but because I’m the youngest on my team, all of the managerial tasks are put on me. I mean, we have a secretary for a reason and that’s literally in the job description. Why can’t they do it?” 

“Guess this is a bad week for both of us,” Jake says with a light chuckle. “I look forward to the weekend when I realize it’s Monday.” 

“What about you, Sunghoon? How are things with you and the firm?”

The condensation of his drink feels nice against Sunghoon’s palm. Jay and Jake are looking at him expectantly and he knows the topic would come around to his job at one point or another. He plasters a small smile on his face and tries to answer as honestly as possible. 

“Same old, same old. I’ve only been working late a few days every other week. It’s not as taxing as it was before.” 

“Are the higher ups still giving you a hard time?”

Sunghoon shrugs. “I’m only responsible for seven junior analysts. They’re all competent enough and get their work done on time. I don’t really have to look after them like my colleagues and thank god for that.” 

“I’m still rooting for you to quit your job,” Jay encourages. 

“I’ll quit my job when you quit yours.” 

“Touche.” They don’t press him about it anymore. 

“Any update on the hottie next door?” Jake asks.

“Don’t call Y/N that,” Sunghoon scolds. “You make her sound like a hooker.” 

Jake shrugs. “You said she was hot.” 

“I said she was pretty.”

“So you don’t think she’s hot?” Sunghoon rolls his eyes as the other two laugh at him from across the booth. “Relax, I’m just messing with you. It’s fun to see you all riled up.” 

“There’s something incredibly wrong with you.”

“Okay, enough with Jake.” Jay pushes his friend to the back of the booth to get closer to Sunghoon with both elbows on the table. “On a serious note, have you talked to her yet?” Sunghoon closes his eyes shut in shame and grimaces. “I’ll take it as a no?” 

“Oh we talked,” he says, opening his eyes to stare at the ceiling above him. “I actually grew a pair and talked to her when I came home.” 

“Why is that a bad thing?” 

“I started the only conversations we’ve had by saying ‘hey’ like a virgin loser.” Sunghoon groans before facing his friends again. “She called me out on it too.” 

“Ouch,” Jake winces. “That bad?” 

“Well, she laughed and we talked about my job a little. She called me a superhero for dealing with math.” 

Jay shrugs. “You kind of are.”“Did anything else happen?” Jake asks. “Did she invite you over? Did you invite her over?”

“Slow down, Jaeyun. Not everyone is as pathetically desperate as you are.” 

Sunghoon laughs. “No, I didn’t invite her over. I also didn’t go to her place. But she said she hoped the next day would be kinder so I think that’s a good sign?” 

“Dude, you’re thinking way too hard about this. That’s like, the best kind of sign. It means she cares about you.” 

“I wouldn’t go so far to say that. Maybe the next time I see her, I won’t be such a fucking loser.” Sunghoon finishes his drink. 

“Well, maybe you won’t be so tongue tied now that you guys are familiar with each other,” says Jake. “She knows something about you now.” 

“But I don’t know anything about her,” Sunghoon groans. 

“That’s why you make small talk, Hoon. Maybe try asking Y/N about her day and see where that takes you.” 

“Y/N seems like the kind of person to keep to herself. She’s always so quiet.” 

“Maybe she’s just a quiet person, then,” Jay adds. “You know, someone you have to get to know in order to get them out of their shell.” 

“I’m so bad at talking to girls.” Sunghoon chastises himself and nods when the waiter signals to ask if he’d like another beer. “I get in my own head and end up making a fool of myself.” 

“If words fail, just smile at her and use your good looks,” Jake teases. The waiter brings the three of them fresh, cold bottles. Sunghoon takes a long sip and savors the flavor as it slides down his throat. The coolness of the liquid provides a nice contrast to his warm face. 

“I couldn’t tell you why I'm so hung up on Y/N. When I see her, I feel like my feet are planted into the floor and nothing I want to say comes out of my mouth.” 

“That, my friend, is what it’s like to have a crush,” Jay says. “I mean, you remember the time Jake had a crush on his lab partner in sophomore year, right? The one time he brought her coffee, he ended up spilling it on her white shirt.” 

“Shut the fuck up,” Jake groans. “But God, I’m really no better.” 

“You’re not the only one feeling like this, man.” Jay takes a drink. “Maybe you should take it as slow as you are right now, you know? Start by talking to her before you both go your separate ways. Maybe you’ll be comfortable enough to ask her on a date.” 

Sunghoon laughs humorlessly. “God, I’ve been pining after this girl for so long and I don’t know a single thing about her other than her name. What if I never get to know her? What if she moves away and we don’t keep in touch? Or worse, what if she's dating somebody? What if she’s not into guys?” 

“Well, I don’t think we can help there,” Jake shrugs. 

“I mean, I’d be bummed but I wouldn’t be upset.” 

“You would totally be upset.” 

“Okay,” Sunghoon says. “Maybe a little upset.”

“There’s no use in thinking about what-ifs,” Jay advises. “You’ll only give yourself a headache.” 

“My mom keeps asking about when I’m gonna get a wife,” Sunghoon complains. “Every time we talk on the phone, I can tell she humors the pleasant talk about my job and life because she becomes really animated when she asks that question. How do I tell her that I’m so fucking hung up on my neighbor that the thought of dating anyone else repulses me?” 

“Damn,” Jay swears. “You really like this girl, don’t you?” 

“Yes, and it’s really fucking frustrating to pine after her because I barely know her and I’m ready to drop everything if she called me right now.” 

“Maybe she’s not worth it,” Jake says with a shrug. “I know that’s the last thing you want to hear, but maybe there’s a reason why you haven’t been able to make a move on her. Maybe you guys aren’t good for each other and the universe is trying to tell you that. I don’t know.” 

“I just wish someone would send me a sign,” Sunghoon pleads. “I don’t really know what sign, but something that’ll make us talk more. I need courage. I just need one chance. If it fails and she rejects me, then I’ll be an adult and move on with my life.” 

“You deserve to be happy,” says Jay. “After all the shit you’ve been through, you deserve at least to go on a date with a cute girl.” 

“Everything feels so bleak these days. I go to work every single day and leave unfulfilled. It’s like I’m floating through my day to make it to the weekend just to do this every single week. Before I know it, the holidays have come and another year goes by. I feel like I’m wasting my life by being at this job but my parents sacrificed so much so that I could have the life I have now.

“I don’t know what to do, guys. Every day feels the same. I wonder if this is how my life is supposed to be for the rest of it. Life is so fucking hard and all I want is a break. I just want to feel something.”

“I wish we could give it to you,” Jay says quietly. He knocks his hands to Sunghoon’s. “You know we’re with you every step of the way, right?” 

“I know. It’s just…hard.” 

“You’re the best person I know, Hoon,” Jake comforts. “I’m really sorry that everything went down the way it did.” 

“Sometimes, I wonder if I feel like this for Y/N because I daydream about her to escape my life,” Sunghoon confesses. “I think about a future with her, and I know that sounds crazy considering I barely know her, but sometimes I wonder what it’ll be like to come home to her instead of parting ways when we get home at the same time. I think about cooking meals for her and going on dates instead of working late. I think about falling asleep next to her instead of being alone. I wonder what my life would’ve been like if my parents never forced me to study finance. Maybe Y/N and I could have a chance.” 

“Or, maybe you would’ve never met her at all,” Jay says. “Maybe you would’ve never met us.” 

“In another life, I’d own a coffee shop and my biggest worry would be somebody making a scene.” Sunghoon laughs. “I could deal with that.” 

“Do we get free coffee for life?” Jake asks, pointing between himself and Jay. “I think bitching in dive bars all these years together means we deserve free coffee.” 

“I’ll think about it,” Sunghoon teases. “But seriously, I think…I’m so tired of my life right now because I’m unhappy. There’s no excitement. There’s nothing to keep me going. Work doesn’t fulfill me and I hate it when my boss asks me to stay late. But if I quit my job, I don’t know what I’d do. My parents would disown me if I abandoned their plans for me. 

“And you know, I feel so fucking selfish talking like this when there are so many people in Korea who don’t have what I have because they don’t have the means to work. I feel so guilty thinking like this when people go hungry every day because they can’t afford to eat. What kind of person does that make me? I can handle bad days so long as there’s a roof over my head.” 

“Sure, but you can’t control the way you feel and your upbringing doesn’t make you a bad person,” Jay assures. “You can acknowledge that you’ve had it good in life but that doesn’t mean your struggles aren’t any less valid.” 

“Yeah, and beating yourself up over it is only making you more upset. You deserve to be happy, Sunghoon. Don’t forget that.” 

“Thanks, guys. I guess I’ve avoided saying how unhappy I am out loud. Sometimes it feels too much because I don’t have a second to myself. When I get home, I sleep and then the next day comes. I dread closing my eyes because that means I have to work the next day.”

“One step at a time,” Jay says. “We’ll be there with you until you figure out what to do next.” 

“You guys mean the world to me. You know that, right?” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Jake says, hiding his blush. “We know.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

Another week goes by and Sunghoon is disappointed because not once did he run into you. 

He doesn’t know if the universe has it against him or what it is about his conversation with his friends that has left him feeling so empty these past few days. Leaving the bar with alcohol and hope in his system had Sunghoon feeling like he was on top of the world and that everything would fall into place if he willed it enough. But upon coming home on Monday evening and the nights after that, he didn’t see you at your door. 

Sunghoon wonders if his life was always supposed to be like this–stagnant to the point where he feels numb, like he's supposed to be a cog in the machine until the day he retires. Even then, Sunghoon wonders if he’ll be happy when he’s finally able to stop being miserable. His greatest fear is looking back at his life and seeing a plethora of unhappy moments instead of achieving what he wanted for himself. He’s afraid of taking his last breath, regretting the relationships he let fall through the cracks and not choosing a life that he wanted to live in favor of making his parents happy. 

He wonders if there’s more to his life than feeling alone all the time. He wonders if he’ll regret marrying the person he spends the rest of his life with if he continues down this path, so aggravated by his mother’s inquiries about his love life that he’ll ask the first girl who shows interest in him to marry him. Sunghoon doesn’t know when he’ll stop feeling like an empty shell of a human being and he can’t remember the last time he was truly happy. 

Everyday, Sunghoon feels like he’s on autopilot. It feels as though someone else has taken control of his life and he’s completing the orders of somebody else against his will. It’s hard to push back against his norm when he’s got nobody to stand behind him. Knowing his parents would be disappointed in him if he abandoned the life he worked hard for is enough for Sunghoon to remain afraid of changing anything. 

He’s snapped out of his daydreams when he hears you come home. This is the first time that you’ve arrived later than he has, to his knowledge, and he wonders if you’ve had dinner. It’s a Friday night and he thinks about if you’ve got any plans for later in the evening. 

Sunghoon stares at the television screen and lets the colorful animation fly right over his head as he contemplates his next move. He’s itching to invite you over with all of the unopened bottles of soju he has in his fridge, thanks to Jake buying a case for him at the start of the week. All of the thoughts about how his life feels desolate is enough to convince him that he might have enough courage to invite you over for drinks. 

Without thinking too much about it, Sunghoon stands from his spot on the couch and grabs two bottles from his fridge. He pays no mind to the cold sensation against his palms, nor does he care that he’s walking in the hallway in his pajamas and slippers. Sunghoon shoves down any nervousness as he knocks on your doors and figures he has nothing to lose, even if you reject him. He hears your feet shuffling behind the door before you open it. 

“Sunghoon?” you say with an uptick in your voice. “Are you okay?” 

“I’m fine,” he says, clearing his throat. Sunghoon holds up the soju bottles, where the condensation has begun running down the side of the glass and onto his fingers. “I, uh, have a few bottles because a friend bought them for me and don’t want to drink them by myself. I was wondering if you wanted to come over and have a drink with me.” 

You peer up at him and Sunghoon feels like you’re inspecting him. He avoids running back to his apartment despite his mind telling him to hide. It’s at this moment that Sunghoon realizes he’s putting his heart on his sleeve.

“I’d love to,” you agree. “Would you mind giving me a few minutes? I want to change into something more comfortable.” Sunghoon looks at your attire and you’re still dressed like you’ve just come back from work.

“Yes,” he nods. “Of course. Take all the time you need. Just knock on my door when you’re ready.” 

You give him a smile that makes him feel like his heart might burst right out of his chest. 

He anxiously waits for you and pulls out his speaker, connecting his phone to play at an appropriate volume. Sunghoon sifts through his playlists until he lands on one that he’s satisfied with and pockets his phone, anxiously pacing around the living room until he hears you knock. 

“You look cozy,” he comments, seeing your pajama pants and a sweater that looks a bit too oversized on your body. Sunghoon tries his best to keep himself from making you uncomfortable and steps aside to let you in. 

“I hope it’s okay that I brought my own slippers.” He looks down to see your purple ones. “I felt kind of weird putting my shoes on when you’re only a few steps away from me.”

“I don’t mind at all.” Sunghoon brings out two shot glasses from his cabinets and sets them down on the coffee table in front of the couch. “Feel free to make yourself at home.” 

You sit politely on the couch while Sunghoon opens a bottle of peach soju and pours a shot in both glasses. He’s slightly buzzed from previously drinking alone and chuckles when he sees your leg crossed over the other, handing one of the glasses to you. His usual, awkward demeanor is relinquished with the alcohol in his system already. 

“Here, I think you’ll need a shot or two to loosen up.” You laugh when you hear the glass clink against his before drinking. 

“Sorry, it’s been a while since I’ve done this.” 

He raises his eyebrow. “This?” 

“Drink,” you clarify. “And get to know somebody completely off the bat.” 

“Well, I’d say we’re pretty acquainted.” Sunghoon pours another shot for himself and beckons you to bring yours over. “We’ve been neighbors for a few months and we know each other’s names. I think we know each other pretty well.” 

“Your definition of knowing someone well is different from mine. But maybe I’ll need to take a page or two out of your book.” The two of you clink glasses and drink together. 

“You know, I was a little nervous about asking you to hang out,” Sunghoon confesses, sitting on the couch with a respectable distance between the two of you. “You’re the only neighbor I see regularly. It’s nice to see a familiar face from time to time.” 

You take the bottle from Sunghoon. “I think you might be the only person I’ve spoken to, really. Well, except for the doorman.” 

“Love that guy.” Sunghoon lets you pour liquid into his shot glass and the two of you take another shot together. 

“I don’t feel like I’ve gotten to know a lot of the people here. But it’s a big building and so much is always happening. I feel like I’m playing catch up every time people greet me when we’re in the elevator together.” 

“You get used to it. There are people from all walks of life who live here and sometimes it’s hard to remember who’s who.” 

“I moved in a few months ago, as you know, and I feel like I’m just barely starting to get to know the neighborhood. Do you know Mrs. Kang from 31B? Apparently, her grandson owns a noodle shop just two blocks from here and she swears it’s a neighborhood staple.” 

“It’s a small hole in the wall that gets the job done,” Sunghoon nods. “It’s pretty good but they close so early.” 

You frown. “That’s a shame.” 

“What do you do for work, if you don’t mind me asking? We run into each other at the same time most of the week so I figured you might have a night job, or something.” 

“I work as security at the Seoul Metropolitan Library and I usually cover the night shifts because people rarely volunteer for them.” 

Sunghoon pours more soju in the glasses. “Oh, really? That’s pretty cool. Do you like working there?” 

“It’s a comfortable job that pays decently well. It isn’t the most exciting job but it’s a means to an end, you know?” 

Sunghoon immediately drinks his shot. “I know it all too well.” 

You follow suit. “Is your job really that bad?” 

“I don’t want to bore you with the details, or anything. I invited you over because I thought we could be friends.” 

You look at him, amused. “Sunghoon, it’s a Friday night and we’re both staying indoors to drink. This is the perfect time to bitch and moan about your job.” 

“Well, shit. In that case, I think we’ll need to finish this bottle off and get another two.” 

He leaves you on the couch when the two of you finish the bottle and brings out two more, along with some dry snacks he found in his kitchen. He brings them over on a stray to avoid cleaning a mess while he’s inebriated and sets it on the table in front of you. By now, you’ve taken the liberty to sink to the floor and rest your back on the couch. Sunghoon hides behind a grin at the notion that you might already be comfortable around him. 

“Alright, I’ll need to be significantly more drunk to talk about work. You absolutely don’t have to drink more if you don’t want to.” 

“Don’t be silly,” you say, grabbing the bottle from him before pouring yourself another shot. “It’s no fun to drink alone.” Sunghoon’s cheeks burn as he watches you swallow the liquid, forcing himself to focus on anything but you to avoid choking on his own spit. 

Sunghoon’s mind is already hazy from the head start he had but he can’t deny that you look like the epitome of comfort in your oversized hoodie and pajama pants. He wonders if this is what you must look like when you get home from work and if you’re somebody who likes to sleep with the blankets tucked just underneath your chin. He wills himself to stop daydreaming when he hears you put the glass on the table. 

“My job is soul-sucking,” Sunghoon begins. “Everyday is the same and I sit in my office contemplating on jumping out of my window if that means I stop being so miserable every time I open my eyes.” 

“You work in finance, right?”

He nods, touched that you remembered. “I do. To sum it up, my job is basically to tell people whether or not they’re spending their money wisely to make a profit. It’s a greedy, immoral business that makes everybody miserable. Yet, everyone keeps a straight face and pretends to be happy by gloating about how much money they have or what liquid assets are in their possession.”

“Sounds tough.” 

“I’m pretty good with numbers and my dad works in finance, too. I guess it runs in my blood.” 

“That doesn’t mean you have to like it.” 

Sunghoon shakes his head. “I know. But he’s set some pretty high expectations for me that seem pretty unattainable and it feels like the only way I can make him proud is by staying at this job and climbing the ranks until I become somebody’s boss. 

“Sometimes, it feels like I’m living somebody’s else’s life and I’m watching from the backseat. Most days make me feel like my life runs on a loop because I experience the same kind of dread every time I wake up and get ready for work. I can’t enjoy coming home because I stay later than what’s expected of me and barely get a wink of sleep before I do it all over again.”

“I can understand that to a degree,” you say. Sunghoon watches as you fidget with the strings on your sweater. “Living for somebody else feels bleak when every day feels the same. It’s like there’s no beginning or end.” 

He nods enthusiastically. “There’s no purpose in my life right now. I don’t care about our clients or that the rich are getting richer. They could give their money away to people who actually need it but don’t.” 

“People who have power are greedy and that’s true no matter where you go. It doesn’t matter if it’s money or influence, politics or connections, it’s always the same.” 

“I come from money too,” he admits, pouring himself another shot. Sunghoon stares at the liquid until it settles within the small glass and sighs. “My dad made a fortune in the economic boom just after he married my mom. He understands the struggle, to a degree, but I think he lost a lot of it when his career took off. 

“I grew up in a gated community and never had to think twice about asking for anything because I knew I’d always get it. I was so spoiled as a kid and was always told to be grateful for what I have because not many people could say the same.” Sunghoon laughs incredulously. “God, I sound like a dipshit.” 

“Maybe just a little.” The way you smile at him makes Sunghoon feel like his stomach is performing backflips. 

“I realized a lot of people weren’t like me when I got to university. My best friends had part-time jobs to afford tuition while I didn’t have to. How fucked up is that? I realized the majority of the world works so hard for virtually nothing while people like me sit on power and do horrible things with it. The company I work for glorifies these kinds of people and it pains me to see who gets taken advantage of in the name of making a sale. 

“I don’t say that to make you feel sorry for me, or anything,” Sunghoon says, looking at you. “Although, I’m pretty drunk at this point and can’t seem to shut up.” You pour yourself another shot and nudge your glass against his. 

“The world might be a messed up place but that doesn’t mean you have to beat yourself up for it. Sometimes you need to follow what you’re told just to survive.” 

“So we both know what it’s like to work in a corporate hell hole, huh?” Sunghoon asks. He chugs his shot and you follow suit. 

“Something like that, yeah. In my experience, putting your head down can only last for so long. Being in that kind of environment makes a person feel like I’m a pawn in someone else’s game and I can’t speak up for myself without repercussions.” 

“You fucking get it,” Sunghoon muses. He slaps his thighs like it’s a revelation. “I don’t have many friends other than the two guys I met in university because this job has cut into every part of my life. My colleagues are all people who care a little too much about their jobs and make it a mission to see who can yield the highest profit margin for clients across the board. It’s depressing, really.” 

“Money makes people do crazy things. People forget their morals if that means they get a big payout.” 

“I feel like I’m the only person at the company who feels like this. Everybody brags about their work. My boss always tells me I’m doing it right by keeping my success stories to myself but he doesn’t get that I feel ashamed to be doing the work that I do.” 

You nod slowly. Sunghoon’s eyes are fixed on the way you shift your gaze to look at the coffee table in front of you and the way your mouth parts slightly ajar like you’re about to say something. He waits patiently for you, but you don’t say anything. 

“Anyway, sorry for the rant,” he apologies, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or to talk that long.” 

“You didn’t. You just made me think a lot about my life. I hadn’t realized that I felt the same.” Sunghoon gestures his hand, beckoning for you to continue. “Ah, my life is filled with chaos. Most days, I don’t know when to quit or when I'll be able to live a peaceful life. It feels right to hope for the best but expect the worst and I’ve grown quite tired of waiting on someone to rescue me.” 

“I’m sorry you feel this way too.” 

“Thank you. I didn’t know my parents growing up and I lived far from the city life up until I was sixteen. I feel like I pretend to be somebody I’m not to keep my sanity intact on most days. It’s almost like I’ll combust if I face the truth.” 

“Makes you feel like a machine, doesn’t it?” 

“Yeah. It feels like I have no personality and that my opinion doesn’t matter.” 

“My colleagues make me feel like I have no voice, either. If I don’t follow the rules the way it’s written to get a job done, then I fail, even if I secure success for my client. Do you ever feel like that?” 

Sunghoon watches you nod with a tired laugh. “All the time. Individuality doesn’t matter if you’re doing something to serve the purpose of the ‘greater’ good. What matters is if everyone acts accordingly.” 

“It’s a fucked up world we live in, Y/N, let me tell you that.” 

“I guess I’m starting to realize just how unhappy I’ve been lately. Sometimes it feels like I’m not meant to amount to anything if it’s not to make other people happy by overextending myself.” 

“Don’t say that,” Sunghoon says, knocking his knee with yours. “I’m sure you’re amazing.” He watches you bite your lip to keep from smiling. 

“I bet you’re amazing too, Sunghoon.” 

“I don’t want to be somebody who follows orders all the time, especially when I don’t believe in them. My boss is somebody who has no values as long as money comes pouring in. He gave me a box of documents to process a few months ago. It had a thumb drive with digital records but none of them made any sense because it didn’t match the payroll for anyone in the company. I tried to look into it on my own but nothing on that drive made any sense when I compared it to financial records we keep for transparency purposes.” 

Sunghoon watches your eyes snap to him. “Financial records?” 

He nods. “All the names were people who worked for the company but none of the paystubs matched what we keep on file. I think he must’ve given it to me by accident because he came back a week later and asked to look at the box.”

“What happened next?” 

“Something felt off about these records so I took a spare thumb drive from the office supply room and put it in that box.” 

“What did you do with the actual thumb drive?” 

Sunghoon purses his lips. “It’s in my bedroom. I haven’t looked at it since that day because I’m worried that the higher-ups will trace company property back to my personal laptop. I know I shouldn’t have done it and I probably should’ve given it back to my boss, but my gut was telling me something was wrong.” 

You look at him with curiosity and Sunghoon can’t fathom why you must be interested. He’s even more perplexed when he sees you sitting like you haven’t taken a sip of alcohol on an empty stomach, body planted to the ground. He’s impressed with how you aren’t rocking from side to side like he is. His body feels like it’s fidgeting where he sits and he feels his head spinning with the growing silence between the both of you. You must have a high alcohol tolerance. 

“Well anyway,” Sunghoon says while clearing his throat, attempting to dissolve the tension. “I don’t think I’ll be in trouble if no one notices it’s missing. I’ll probably forget about it tomorrow morning or fess up and give it to my boss when I go into work next week.” 

“You should probably keep it a secret until you’re ready to provide evidence.” 

He tilts his head and looks at you. “Yeah…You’re right. I’ve never told anyone this before. It’s been a secret I’ve kept for so long but I can’t trust anyone.” 

“And you feel like you can trust me?” 

Sunghoon shrugs. “You seem loyal. That, and I’m really drunk.” 

“I don’t know about you, but my head feels like it’s spinning.”

“Y/N, you look completely sober right now.” 

You laugh, the kind of laughter that comes from deep within until it bounces against Sunghoon’s walls until you’re covering your mouth with embarrassment. He wouldn’t mind hearing that again. 

“Believe me, I’m pretty drunk. I just conceal it well.” 

“Could’ve fooled me,” Sunghoon teases. “I thought I was drinking alone.” 

You shake your head. “If you need a drinking buddy any time soon, you know where I live.”

“Yeah? You’d be down to do this again?” He watches you tilt your head with a smile he can’t quite decipher, but it hits him right in the chest and the alcohol in his body starts to make his neck feel warm. 

“I would love that,” you say. “I can bring the alcohol next time.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

Things are going well. Too well. Sunghoon can see the sun’s departure as he makes his exit from his office and down to the lobby, where the sky is turning a shade of purple. The car ride home is even more beautiful, so much so that Sunghoon doesn’t mind getting stuck in a spot of traffic on his way home. For the first time in a while, he’s had a good work day.

He thinks back to the night you were in his apartment and the excitement of a budding crush comes back to him all over again. Through his own glossy, alcohol-fueled eyes, he swears you might’ve been flirting with him when you suggested spending time with him in his apartment again. Sunghoon wonders if he’s your every waking thought like you are to him. He then wonders if he should’ve asked for your phone number before you said goodnight and retreated to your apartment. 

Despite this thought, Sunghoon reckons that he’s buzzing from the excitement of getting off of work early. There’s still time for him to engage in whatever he wants to do to unwind after work. He plans on taking extra time to cook himself a big dinner and maybe catch an episode or two of the anime he’s been meaning to finish. When he’s sure you’re back in your apartment, Sunghoon considers asking if you’d be up to hanging out.

He grips his briefcase as he steps into the elevator on his way up to his apartment with a hop in his step. Sunghoon loosens his tie around his neck with his free hand and pushes his clear specks up the bridge of his nose as the elevator door opens. It’s only when he’s about to fish for his keys does he notice your apartment door slightly ajar. 

Your lights are turned off. Sunghoon’s arm is still in his pocket as he reaches for his keys and the metal grows warmer as he holds it in his palm. He stands before his own door, a feeling of uncertainty ringing in his ears as he beholds the unusual sight before him. For the months that you’ve lived next to him, you have never been careless enough to leave your apartment unlocked and available to anyone who might be curious enough to enter. Your door being unlocked makes the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. 

But Sunghoon tries to rationalize with himself. You could be in your apartment with the assumption that you closed your door when you didn’t. Maybe you were in too much of a rush to get to work and didn’t take the time to close your door properly. Surely even an astute and organized person could slip up from time to time, right? 

Or, maybe something is terribly wrong. Maybe you’re in need of help and can’t reach your phone. Sunghoon’s mind runs through a million scenarios, none of which make him feel any better about knowing your door is unlocked. He can partially see inside of it but he can’t see anything else inside. Sunghoon can’t see nor hear you moving in your apartment. Something must be wrong.

Fighting the comfort to dismiss it and retreat back into his apartment, Sunghoon grips his briefcase and shoves his keys back into the depths of his pocket. He takes a careful step forward and feels his balance faltering, wondering if you really did forget to lock the door on your way to work. Still, he thinks it’s better to check if you’re okay before closing your door and telling you about it when you come home. Slowly, Sunghoon uses his free hand to open the door slightly. He pushes his head in and takes a look around but sees nothing out of the ordinary. 

“Y/N?” he calls out, opening the door enough to let his body through. “Are you in here?” 

Sunghoon talks into your apartment and peers around the corner by the hallway when he feels arms around his neck. 

His life flashes before his eyes when he realizes he isn’t alone. The arms around his body feel far too big and muscular to be yours. Sunghoon tries to hit the stranger with his briefcase, but the angle falters and causes him to drop it onto the floor. He grips the assailant’s arm with his fingers in an attempt to pry them off of him until his own fingers feel close to numb. Sunghoon’s attempts prove futile, however, as the strength of the man overpowers him. He feels his breath constrict while his feet shuffle against the hardwood floor, his own voice sputtering out coughs and nonsensical phrases to get the assailant to let him go. 

A force makes it so both he and the attacker stumble forward. Sunghoon falls to the ground as he coughs to regain his breath now that he’s free from the chokehold he was put in, the sound of violent gasps seeping in the air amongst the chaos behind him. As he coughs, he looks beside him and sees you land a punch to his face. 

You’ve managed to close the door as you dodge the stranger’s attempts to hit and kick your body. You move expertly like you’re dancing at the same frequency, anticipating the assailant’s next move like it’s nothing. It looks like a choreographed sequence with the way you’re maneuvering to block yourself from getting hit while landing punches to the assailant’s chest until you’ve hit a sore spot, kicking the popliteal to make him surrender. 

You waste no time and place the stranger’s neck between your arms. Sunghoon watches as he tries to push you off of him to no avail. He thrashes and pulls at your arm but you don’t relent, choosing to wrap your legs around his back when he stands in an attempt to rid you from his body. Sunghoon moves to where the two of you aren’t to stay from the action. 

Eventually, the assailant manages to back you into a wall until you shout in pain. The small distraction allows the stranger to pull away from your grasp and run towards your window, bracing himself before breaking the glass and making a run for it. 

It’s over as quickly as it began. The sound of glass shattering rings in Sunghoon’s mind as he stares at the shards littered around your floor. He rushes next to you when he notices you walking towards him. Sunghoon watches as you peer out of the window and hastily grabs onto your arm to prevent you from following the assailant out of the window. 

“Are you okay?” you ask when you finally look back at him. He’s got a red patch on his jaw from being knocked in the face by an elbow, but Sunghoon’s doing well with the adrenaline that’s coursing through his veins. It's you he’s worried about.

“I’m fine. Are you okay?” Sunghoon lets go of your arm. “What the fuck just happened?”

You talk away from him to turn on the overhead lights to assess the damages to your face on your wall mirror by the door that managed to survive the attack. With a split crack down the middle, you stare at the faint purple bruise on your left cheekbone and the swelling of your bottom lip. Sunghoon watches you from where you stand and uses this opportunity to catch his breath. He watches as you tilt your head to look at your once-bruiseless face, now littered with scratches, and feels an ache in his chest along with confusion. 

When he looks around the room, he’s perplexed to see how empty it is. You have a single loveseat facing towards the door with your television mounted in front of it. You have a single chair and a small dining table and the walls are completely blank with no photos held up by picture frames. The open kitchen is barely functional and it seems like all you have is one of everything–one pot, one pan, one set of utensils, one plate, and one bowl–while the rest of the living room has none of your personality. 

Sunghoon questions all of it. He wonders if this is the reason you’re always in a rush to get inside when he sees you unlocking the door. He thinks back to all the times the two of you have walked together and can’t recall a single time he ever saw anything other than white walls. There’s nothing on your wall except the mirror you’re standing in front of. 

“What the hell just happened, Y/N?” 

You turn to look at him and Sunghoon feels as if you’re trying to tell him something. He’s never seen you look like this before, so hard and controlling. He’s used to your soft laughter and easy eyes, not the sharp daggers in your irises.

“There are very bad people in the world,” you tell him cryptically. “You need to learn how to be more careful with things that aren’t yours.” 

“What the fuck are you talking about?” 

You turn around and look at Sunghoon, averting your eyes to the mess around you both. He follows your line of sight and hears as you curse underneath your breath. The curtains that have been pulled back flutter in the wind as it starts to pick up, and suddenly the apartment starts to feel much colder because of it. While Sunghoon is visibly panicking, he’s confused as to why you aren’t.

“I’m sorry, Sunghoon, but for me to tell you that, I’m going to need you to leave with me.” 

“Leave with you?” he asks, stepping away from the glass shards. “What are you talking about? Why do we need to leave?” 

“Because of that.” You point at the broken window. “Whoever that was will come back and finish the job if you’re not careful. If you want to live, you need to do as I say.”

“Y/N, I know we’ve been neighbors for a few months, but you’re asking me to blindly trust you after someone tried to kill me.”

“He tried to kill us, actually,” you correct. “But I see your point. Don’t leave because you trust me, then. Leave because he knows who you are and where you live, and won’t hesitate to come back.”

Sunghoon gulps. “He’s gonna come back?” You tilt your head and look at him in a way that makes him believe you can sense his confusion. You don’t step closer to him with the fear that he’d attempt to pass through you to get into the safety of his apartment. Instead, you take a deep breath. 

“I’m asking you to value your life and keep living,” you say. “I saved you, Sunghoon. I’m not trying to hurt you.” 

“I can’t believe this.” He shakes his head and looks away, averting his gaze to the broken window. “I can’t believe someone broke into your apartment and tried to fucking kill you. At least have the decency to act scared.” 

“I’m petrified.” Sunghoon’s eyes are back on you when he hears the upstick in your voice. “But things don’t surprise you when they happen often.” 

The apartment is quiet, save for the soft hum of the wind from outside and the tree branches knocking against the window frame. Sunghoon still feels like his ears are ringing and that his veins are pumping with adrenaline as he looks at you with a pained and confused expression. If you’re someone who’s had to fight men twice your size to survive, he doesn’t want to know what would happen to him if he chose to stay behind. He also doesn’t want to think about how your life likely did depend on it at one point or another. 

The crush he’s harbored for you since he first saw you move in makes this whole ordeal that much more confusing. To the untrained eye, you look incapable of jumping into a fist fight nor do you look strong enough to pry a grown man off of another person. The idea of you in his head is unlike the person he sees standing before him. To Sunghoon, you are someone who likes to walk on the slow path, letting life take you wherever it sees fit. He thinks of you as a quiet, unassuming individual who accepted that, like himself, the kind of quiet life you were living was one you’d live for the rest of your life. 

But he’s scared out of his mind when he sees the bruise setting on your face and the way your lips are swelling up. He watches you look around the room before heading into your bedroom, and he wonders what you must be looking for. 

Your bedroom is just as bare and desolate as your living space. A single twin bed faces the door and a small nightstand with an equally small lamp sits beside it. There’s a book in one of the hollow spaces and your closet area is small, tucked away behind a door mirror that serves to cover your hanging clothes. You have nothing on your wall. No photo, no artwork, nothing that could tell Sunghoon anything about you. Sunghoon gets a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“Y/N,” he pleads, voice cracking when he speaks. “What’s going on?” 

You just look at him. “I’m sorry, Sunghoon.” 

“Sorry? Why are you sorry? What’s there anything to be sorry about? Someone broke into your apartment and then tried to kill us.” 

Your posture sinks as the weight of reality overcomes your perception. Sunghoon watches as you hold yourself back and averts his eyes when he assumes you’re about to cry to be polite. His heart lurches in his chest and he feels like he might cry too.

“I really need you to trust me.” You sound helpless and he wonders if you feel that way too. “I would never ask you to do something if it wasn’t absolutely necessary. Your life is in danger, Sunghoon. I don’t want to see you die.” 

“Woo says I’m going to die?” he asks. Why should I trust you? Who the fuck are you and how do you know how to fight like that?” 

“You need to trust me because there is no one who can protect you from what you witnessed and I’m somebody who can protect you if this happens again.” 

“That’s not an answer.” 

“That’s the only answer I can give right now.” 

Sunghoon sighs. “You’re asking a lot of me, Y/N.” 

“Fine.” 

Sunghoon watches you pull a backpack from your closet and haphazardly throw in shirts, undergarments, and other items into it. It’s when you pull the vent cover from the wall that Sunghoon starts to panic. You pull out a large ziplock bag with stacks of cash and other items he assumes are credit cards and passports. When you pull a gun from your nightstand and push into your backpack, you look at him. 

“You can stay. But know that I will not come back should anything happen to you or the people you care about.” He doesn’t know if this is a threat or not. But his heart is beating erratically and the thought of being without your help doesn’t make him feel better. 

He doesn’t want to go. He wants to retreat back to his apartment and pretend this never happened. Sunghoon wishes he would’ve ignored that gut feeling in his stomach to check if you were okay and live his life blissfully unaware of what life you must live to attract people who are out to kill you. But thinking like this makes Sunghoon feel guilty because despite your unusual talent for warding off men twice your size and height, he would be damned if something serious happened to you. 

Even so, leaving his life behind feels unfair. The idea of leaving his friend and family behind makes his stomach churn. Will he ever be able to see his friends again? What about his mother, father, and sister? What of them? Will they have to wonder where their son is and deal with the aftermath of not knowing that Sunghoon’s gone missing, let alone why? Sunghoon can’t think of the last time he talked to his family on the phone. His poor sister, too, will have to continue growing up without a brother to protect her. 

But none of that matters if what you say is true. Even if Sunghoon chose not to follow you and remain as clueless about your life as he does now, the chance that he’ll be safe doesn’t seem like a risk worth taking. The strange man still knows where he lives and what he looks like. If what you claim is true, then this man will eventually find Sunghoon and kill him. Whatever “bad” means to you must really be bad if someone was aiming to murder you.  

“Okay,” he says with a trembling voice. “I’ll go with you.” 

“You’re making the right decision,” you explain with your arms gesturing to the space around you. “The life you have…whatever it means to you, it will never be the same. There is a very bad man who works for someone equally worse. They’ll always find you.” 

“I understand, I think.” 

“It’s a lot to ask of you. I know,” you nod. “That man knows what you look like now and will be able to find you no matter where you go.” 

“So that’s it? I just leave?” 

“Well, you’ll need to do some packing first. Do you have a backpack?” 

“I have one I travel with, yes,” Sunghoon says. 

“Good. Let me gather some things and then we’ll head to your place so you can pack.”

As you continue gathering last minute belongings, Sunghoon takes the time to comprehend just how strange this situation is. Why is your apartment so empty? It looks as if no one is supposed to live here, like this space is just temporary. It barely looks like a functioning living space. How do you entertain yourself? If you’re able to afford living in this apartment, how come you don’t have any furniture to fill the space? And what about decorations? Why don’t you have any photos of yourself, your friends, or your family hung up on the walls? 

The harder he thinks, the more his headache returns. You live in isolation to the point where he starts to question everything he knows about you. All of your belongings could fit into the backpack you’re carrying and he wonders if this familiar experience is something you’re running away from. 

Sunghoon can only stare in utter shock as you pull out a plastic bag filled with things he's only seen in movies. More passports, more cash, more credit cards, and what he assumes to be more fake driver’s licenses. Your supply seems endless. Underneath your sink contains knives stashed away in protective bags that you shove into the backpack with one tucked behind you. The way you touch these weapons without flinching scares him. 

He knows he shouldn’t be naive to find normalcy in your actions, even if you look eerily calm and composed. 

“So this is it?” Sunghoon asks when you walk past him, following you to the living room. 

“Mhm,” you mumble, looking at your broken window. He watches as you sigh before you turn all of the lights off and lock the door behind you. 

Walking into the well-lit hallway feels weird. It’s too normal. 

“What should I bring and how much of everything?” he asks after he’s let the both of you inside of his apartment.

“You’ll want to change out of your clothes and get into something more comfortable,” you say, gesturing at his work attire. “Wear comfortable running shoes. Bring as many shirts, pants, and underwear as your backpack can fit. Make sure to bring a toothbrush and toothpaste, too. Bring only one jacket. You won’t need more than one. You have fifteen minutes. I’ll wait in the living room.” 

Sunghoon watches your figure disappear down the hall and gets to work immediately, changing out of his suit and into comfortable pants and a t-shirt. He doesn’t bother putting away his suit jacket and slacks. Sunghoon shoves what he assumes to be necessities into his backpack and rummages in his bathroom for things he’ll need until the two of you need to stop to buy the essentials. He feels like he’s got tunnel vision, focusing on the task at hand to prevent himself from losing his mind over the situation he’s found himself in.

But a photo on his nightstand stops him in his tracks. 

It’s a picture of his family and the first time Jay and Jake made the trip to his hometown after graduating college. They’d embarked on a road trip and spent some time in his parents’ house before the week-long adventure of exploring the nearby area before the reality of work and responsibilities sunk in. His father had Sunghoon set up a self timer photo to commemorate the bond between his friends and adulthood before his career would eventually begin in the fall. Sunghoon and his friends sat on the picnic table with their bodies facing the camera as his parents stood around him. His sister held up a peace sign next to Sunghoon. The memory feels distant.

Sunghoon puts the photo down and makes his way back to the living room eventually, forcing himself not to pick up anything that isn’t a necessity. He puts his wallet on the coffee table and you turn around to see his backpack in his hand while he witnesses you looking at the decor on his wall. 

“You have a nice apartment.” 

“Thanks.” 

You pick up his wallet. “Do you have your birth certificate on you? Maybe a passport or any other identification?” 

“Just my passport.” Sunghoon runs back into his room to grab it before handing it to you, then pointing at his computer on the couch. “And my laptop.” 

“We’ll need to bring both of those.” 

“What for?” 

You give him a look that gives him a bad feeling. “We’ll need to destroy them as soon as we can. I can’t have them finding you that easily.”

Sunghoon sighs and grabs his computer. “If it’s for the best.” 

“I wouldn’t ask this of you if it weren’t necessary. I’m sorry, I really am.” 

Sunghoon thinks he hears your voice waver. Choosing to forego any more pleasantries, you allow him to lock his door before beckoning him to give you his keys. 

“I assume we need to get rid of these?” 

“You’re catching on pretty quick,” you say. “We’ll bury these somewhere far from here so no one can find them.” 

“I think the adrenaline is getting to me.” 

You look around his room. “Where’s the thumb drive that your boss gave you?” 

Sunghoon looks at you quizzically. “What?” 

“The thumb drive with financial records on it. Where is it?” 

“In my bedroom. Why are you asking about it?” 

“Bring it with you.” You push Sunghoon back to his room with a little more force than he expected. He stumbles over himself and pulls it out his desk drawer.

“Why is this so important? Why were you asking about it when you were here?” 

“There’s no time to explain right now, but we need to bring it with us and keep it safe. It’s best if I hold onto it.” He’s skeptical. You sigh when you see his expression change into something unpleasant. “Sunghoon, I’m being completely honest with you when I say both of our lives depend on what’s on that thumb drive. If this disappears or if it’s destroyed, we’re both dead.” 

He hesitates but hands you the thumb drive away. Sunghoon looks around his apartment once more, memorizing the sight of the coffee mug on the counter he neglected to wash because he was rushing and the remote that he’d thrown haphazardly on the couch the night before. All of this makes him want to cry. The thought of never returning makes him feel like throwing up.

You lead him out of the building and lock his door with the keys before pocketing them in your pants. He follows you down the stairs to avoid the elevator and assumes you’re leading him down the back route where you don’t have to run into the doorman, who will likely strike a conversation with the both of you and find it odd that you’re rushing out of the building at this hour.

“You’re scaring me with how much you know about what we need to do next,” Sunghoon comments. 

“It comes with the job description,” you explain vaguely. “I was trained to think quickly in these types of situations and what to do if someone tries to kill you in your own home.” 

“Trained?” 

Sunghoon chokes as he looks at you but you’re too busy looking elsewhere to see the shock on his face. It feels like he’s sucking in his breath before you finally turn to look at him.

“Let’s find a secure place before we talk.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

The two of you avoid taking the metro. When Sunghoon asks why, you tell him it’s best to keep yourselves from any places that are under heavy surveillance to avoid being tracked. It’s best to keep yourself out of the public eye as much as possible. 

The stillness of the night doesn’t match his erratic heartbeat as he walks through familiar streets that no longer feel like home to him. Every light post feels like there might be someone hiding behind it and every quiet neighborhood makes him feel out of place. Sunghoon wills himself to be calm like you are, but he can’t stop himself from replaying the events of earlier that night in his head.

Who are you? Why do you know so much about being on the run? What kind of life do you live that forces you to be somebody who looks over their shoulder? 

Sunghoon wonders if this is what he’ll have to deal with for the rest of his life. He isn’t sure whether he can trust you the way you say he can, but he figures it would be better to take his chances with you and die trying instead of waiting for someone to come and kill him. Even if he has to leave everything he loves behind. 

The two of you don’t walk for very long. Dodging metro lines and public transportation feels like the journey takes forever, but you tell him you’ve only walked for roughly an hour and a half in dead silence. Sunghoon doesn’t dare ask a single question for the fear that you might abandon him. 

Soon after you lead him out of your shared neighborhood, Sunghoon finds himself in a small hostel just on the edge of Seoul with two twin beds across from one another and a small bathroom. He watches as you pay in cash and accept the key to the room from the desk employee without so much as a word. The space isn’t the luxury apartment he’d found himself living in for the past three years, but it’s better than sleeping with one eye open in his own bed where anything could happen. The twin mattress is decent enough but he feels like a giant when he lays down after setting aside his belongings.

You don’t unpack your bag or relax like he thinks you will. Instead, you double check to ensure the door is locked and immediately check the bathroom and living area from top to top, corner to corner. Sunghoon watches you pull a nightstand from the corner. He nearly yelps when you dare step on the small, unsteady piece of furniture. 

“What are you doing?” Sunghoon asks, sitting up on the bed. 

“Checking for any potential listening devices,” you say as you pay him no mind, hand touching the small crevice near the window sill. “I highly doubt it, but you can never be too careful.” 

“You mean bugs? Like those things from the movies?” 

You hum. “Yeah, those are the ones. I need to assess the room before we can talk freely.” 

“Oh. I didn’t think people used those in real life.” 

“People do, unfortunately. You have to look at every inch of the room from floor to ceiling. Check the lights, the phone, the back of any objects like picture frames or wall decor, even underneath the toilet seat. Anything you can reach by hand, so can they.” 

Even though Sunghoon doesn’t know the first thing about you, it feels odd to see you like this. You always look somewhere in between disheveled and put together, but the version he's staring at looks nothing like what he’s used to.

Sunghoon is a man of few words hidden behind a million thoughts. He reserves himself for people he feels comfortable around to play it safe, unleashing his loud and extroverted tendencies when he becomes well-acquainted with certain people. Despite uttering a few sentences to you throughout the time you’ve moved next door, Sunghoon has daydreamed about you plenty. 

When Sunghoon closes his eyes, he swears he can see himself asking you on a date. He can picture you saying yes and wearing an outfit that will make his jaw drop until you become bashful under his stare. He imagines getting to know you well enough that when he drops you off at your apartment door, where the two of you become too reluctant to say goodbye until the evening ends with a kiss. His favorite scenario, though, is picturing you sleeping on his chest. His pillows can only help so much.

Sunghoon can’t pinpoint just why he was so fascinated by you. With a single glance, you turned his world upside down and he thinks he’ll never feel anything like that ever again. 

Deep down, Sunghoon assumes part of his thoughts about you is because you’re a disruption in his mundane, boring life that feels like an endless loop. There was nothing for him to look forward to once his life and career became monotonous. But somehow, your honey-like voice and warm smile intrigued him. You’re an enigma he can’t quite seem to understand. It entices him to unravel who you are and what you could mean to him. 

But none of that matters now. Watching you search the perimeter of the room for listening devices is enough to pull Sunghoon’s head out of the clouds.

“Oh God,” Sunghoon exclaims in a panic, as if the thought of his reality crashes down on him all at once. “My job. What the fuck am I gonna do about my job? My boss will report me missing if I don’t show up two days in a row. Fuck, what do I do?” 

“There’s nothing you can do now,” you tell him. “Going back will only increase the risk of getting hurt. Don’t you understand that?” 

“I can’t just leave my fucking job. I’m responsible for training entry level interns. I have so many unfinished reports due at the end of the week. Fuck! What if they call the police because I haven't shown up? 

You sit next to him. “I understand this is a stressful situation, but your life can never go back to the way it was and we have to roll with the punches as they come. If everything goes according to plan, we’ll be too far from Seoul for anyone to find us.” Sunghoon swears he hears a bit of melancholy in your tone. “I’m very sorry:

Somehow, he believes you. “It’s okay. It’s not technically your fault.” 

You don’t meet his eyes. 

“This room is clean, by the way. No audio or video devices.” 

“That’s probably the only good news from today.” 

“We should probably talk about the next steps,” you tell him as you rise from his bed. “We’ll need to get some rest tonight. The hardest part about survival is the first few days and mapping out where we need to go next.” 

“So where do we go?” 

Your shoulders sag. “There might be somebody who can help us. It’s a long shot…but I think if we’re able to reach Jinju in the next few days, then we might be on the right track.”

“Jinju? Why Jinjiu?”

“I have a friend there who might be willing to help us.”

“So why don’t we call them and see if we can crash in the meantime?” 

You shake your head. “It’s not as simple as you make it seem.”

“I’m struggling to keep up.” With pursed lips, you sit on your own bed and face Sunghoon. He watches you tuck your legs underneath yourself until you’re sitting criss-crossed and look down at your lap where you play with your fingers.

“There are people out there who do bad things for a living,” you say. “Really bad things. Worse than whatever imagination your mind can conjure up.” 

Sunghoon’s heart palpitates. “Like what?” You look up at him. 

“Like carrying out a hit.” 

His stomach plummets. 

“Y-You mean to tell me someone was trying to kill you? What for? What sensible reason does anyone have to kill an innocent person?” 

You go back to playing with your fingers. He watches you look at him before biting your cheek and looking at the floor. “There are things in this world many people will never know. Few find out and live to tell the tale. I’m telling you this because I need you to understand me when I tell you things are getting serious, not because I’m trying to hide things from you.”

“Can you at least explain to me what the fuck is going on? Everything you say is cryptic and I know you’re not telling me the whole truth.” 

“There’s a time and place for everything. I promise I’ll tell you everything. You deserve that at the least.” 

“You owe me more than that.”

“I know, Sunghoon. Believe me, I do. But right now your adrenaline is wearing off and neither of us are thinking straight.”

“This is crazy,” he says. “I go to work and come home just to do it over again the next day. I barely have a social life and don’t go out on the weekends as much as my friends want me to. I’m just a normal guy living a normal life. Then, you showed up.”  

Ultimately, Sunghoon knows you’re right. The bright lights of the hostel are suddenly too bright in his vision and they aren’t helping his headache. The mattress he’s sitting on top of suddenly feels too uncomfortable and sharp with the metal springs and rods beneath him. His body is calming down as his breathing returns to a normal rate and his eyes begin to feel heavy. 

He looks at you and finds that you can’t meet his eye. Sunghoon immediately regrets his words and imagines what it must be like for you to carry the weight of knowing someone tried to kill you, coupled with the fact that you have to babysit somebody who has no idea how to fend for his life. Awkwardly, Sunghoon rises from his mattress and mutters about how he’s going to get ready for bed. 

He splashes cold water onto his face to calm his face from the rushing heat creeping up his neck. Sunghoon doesn’t know what to think or how to feel. His bones are starting to feel heavy and his mind is telling him to go back home and pretend everything’s fine. He wants to be wrapped up in a blanket his sister got him for Christmas watching reruns of American television he can barely understand. 

But his gut is telling him to stay with you. He can’t delude himself into thinking his life can go back to the way it was after everything that unfolded. He very well could remain looking over his shoulder for the rest of his life without someone who’s knowledgeable about this side of life. He can’t imagine leaving you without somebody to protect you, even if you seem like you can handle yourself. The least he could do is listen to your orders and follow your instructions until the both of you can live your lives without the fear of imminent danger. These thoughts haunt him as he washes his face and brushes his teeth.

When he emerges from the bathroom, he notices that you’ve changed into sleeping attire and tries to avoid looking at your bare legs when it registers that you’re wearing sleep shorts and a sweater. He feels somewhat remorseful of what could have been if the two of you get to know each other under different circumstances. You brush past him into the bathroom and he can hear the sound of the faucet running when you close the door. 

Everything seems too calm compared to the few hours he spent with you. His ears are no longer ringing and his heartbeat isn’t beating as erratically as before. This is the first time that Sunghoon’s had a few minutes by himself where nothing distracts him from his thoughts. He’s too exhausted to push them away. 

Soon, the two of you are tucked in your respective beds with the moonlight from the window illuminating the shared space. It’s bright enough for Sunghoon to see your figure laying still and facing the wall. You look so meek like this and he wonders how anyone could ever hurt you. He wants to say something, to apologize or thank you for caring about him. 

“I can’t say I’m too sad about leaving my job,” he blurts out. Sunghoon’s about to chastise himself for saying something opposite of what he intended until he hears your bed creaking and looks over to see that you’ve turned to face him. 

“Why’s that?” 

Sunghoon crashes. 

“I’m not happy. I feel like I’m working for nothing and I hate the life I have. People always need me for things and I never get any recognition for the work I do to save everybody’s asses.”

“You sound like you’ve given it a lot of thought.”

Sunghoon stares at the ceiling. “I haven’t been happy with my life in a long time. My friends tell me I keep fooling myself into thinking I have it all because my job pays well and I live by myself. Total autonomy.”

“But your job keeps you from that freedom.” 

“Yes,” Sunghoon says, exasperated. “It feels like I’m living on someone else’s dime. Everything I do at my job is to make people happy because they tell me what to do. It doesn’t matter if I have my own principles. If it doesn’t align with the people who hire me to do my job, my voice doesn’t matter.” You don’t say anything for a moment but Sunghoon’s too caught up in his own thoughts to think about it. 

“I can’t believe I just admitted that out loud.” 

“Sometimes it takes a stranger to say what you really feel.” 

Sunghoon turns to look at you. “You were always the most unpredictable part of my day.” 

“Me?” 

“Yeah. You moved into the apartment next to mine and running into you a few times a week kept me on my toes. I don’t know. I guess I saw you as someone I would have potentially befriended. I could at least pretend I was coming home to talk to someone who cared.” 

“That’s…very sweet. You’re a nice person, Sunghoon.” 

He sighs. “I don’t feel that way. I don’t know when I’m gonna see my family and friends again and explain all of this, but I'm starting to get the feeling that they’ll never hear from me and they’ll never know what happened tonight.” 

“You know,” you begin, “a lot of my life was spent moving from place to place and never having anything or anyone to call home. I can’t imagine what it must feel like for you to leave everything behind. For that, I truly am sorry.”

“It’s really not your fault,” Sunghoon says dryly. “Whoever tried to kill you should get a bullet to his head.” He hears you laugh awkwardly.

“Yeah, well that likely wouldn’t solve our problems.”

“What do you mean?” 

“I don’t think that man acted on his own accord. It’s too professional to assume he’s working alone.” 

“You’re saying he’s working with someone else?” 

“Or, he’s working for someone.” 

Sunghoon gulps. “I hadn’t thought of that.”

“The price of freedom is high. Remember that.” 

“You know, none of this explains how you know what you’re doing. If you know, for that matter.” 

He doesn’t hear you move for a short while and closes his eyes shut. Once again, he’s found himself slipping up and saying things that don't translate well. Too afraid to speak, Sunghoon considers sleeping and dealing with his actions in the morning. 

“I know what I’m doing because I’ve done it before,” you say through the darkness. “When your whole life revolves around survival, you adapt to the best of your ability and do anything to stay alive. I’ve learned a few things from my time on the run so please know that I know what I’m doing.”

“Who are you?” 

The room is silent. 

“Someone you can trust.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

Sunghoon’s surprised when you wake him up as the sun rises to vacate the premises. He gets dressed as quickly as he can and he knows you can hear him yawning as he prepares himself for the day ahead of him. After freshening up and a quick breakfast consisting of leftovers from yesterday’s convenience store run, the two of you return the hostel key and leave as quickly as you came.

Sunghoon watches as you destroy his phone and laptop, which ultimately makes his soul wince at his personal items deemed unworthy and unsafe. It makes him feel like this new lifestyle is set in stone and the physical burial of his worldly possessions feels like he’s burying his normalcy and trading it in for life on the run. You bury it in a plot of land somewhere and let him mourn before he’s ready to pack it up and leave. 

The two of you travel on foot again, stopping by another convenience store to grab more water and food for later. The sun isn’t as warm as it was the day prior and Sunghoon’s grateful that he doesn't have to walk under the sweltering heat with all he’s carrying on his shoulders. He doesn’t know where the two of you are headed and prevents himself from asking more unnecessary questions because he’s met with a wall whenever he speaks about the next steps. In the hours he spends with you, he realizes that you barely know what’s to come.

Eventually, the two of you have found refuge at another hostel, miles away from the first one. Sunghoon doesn’t understand the method to your madness. He’s tried to make small conversation and ask you about your expertise, but you shut him down every time. You keep saying that “now” isn’t the right time to explain things to him because you’re too wrapped up in making sure you both manage to live until the next day. He’s starting to think you're not the person he once imagined you to be.

Sunghoon tries his hand at scaling the hostel for any listening devices at your suggestion. He follows you and watches as you inspect the bathroom–behind the toilet bowl, inside of it, in the shower drain, and behind the medicine cabinet–before he takes a stab at the living area. He feels awkward when you watch him but follows your pointers when you notice that he neglected a few spots. 

One thing he realizes about being on the run is that sometimes, it’s very slow and extremely boring. With no phone or laptop to keep himself company, Sunghoon wishes he remembered to pack a book or two before leaving his apartment for good.

Realistically, you tell him it’s better to get as far away from the origin point as possible in the shortest amount of time. To pass the time, Sunghoon asks you questions he thinks are silly, ones that he’s seen movie characters from spy thrillers ask their partners. 

Can we call anyone for help? No. 

How about taking the bus instead of walking? No. 

Is there anyone who can help us get into another country safely and quickly? Probably not.

It seems like you’ve been leaving Sunghoon with more questions than answers. You leave him in the dark, pondering on his own as you try to come up with a plan and he does his best to be patient with you because he can’t imagine having to care for someone who has no idea how to keep himself alive. Sunghoon daydreams about who you must’ve been in order for someone to attempt to kill you when the two of you are traveling. It keeps him occupied and what prevents him from complaining about walking too much. 

Sunghoon pictures you as someone who knows a little too much. Perhaps you stumbled upon a classified piece of information or made a shady deal with bad people in your past life and moved to Seoul to escape. Maybe that’s why you know so much about being on the run. 

He also thinks you might be some sort of spy dabbling in espionage, and the man who assaulted you is someone who works for your arch nemesis. This idea seems silly because it reminds him of a k-drama his sister used to obsess over but he can’t lie when he thinks about how this theory might be the only one that makes sense. 

Even so, Sunghoon comes to the realization that you are truly, utterly alone. 

He wonders if you have any friends or family that you had to leave behind. You know so much about him because he’s been open about his feelings after the startling realization that his life is something he will never return to. But you’ve kept quiet about who you are up until the point where you moved into the apartment next to his. So caught up in his own miseries, Sunghoon neglected to consider that you would have to leave people behind as well. Do you have loved ones in Seoul? Do you get drinks with your colleagues after work? Is there anyone who would notice you missing? 

He falls asleep with these questions ruminating in his own head. 

The next time Sunghoon opens his eyes, he’s not surprised to find you already packing. Like clockwork, the two of you set out on foot again and walk for miles under the sun until you’re farther away from Seoul. There’s a small noodle shop by the newest hostel and he’s more than shocked when you ask if he’s up for eating dinner there. 

The two of you wear masks and a cap to conceal your identities to the best of your abilities. Sunghoon lets you pay for the noodles upon realizing his own wallet is buried in a plot of land somewhere. The money you have was a stash for a rainy day and he’s wondering when it’ll run out. 

“It’s crazy that you think about this stuff,” he says as the waitress hands off his noodles. “I still don’t understand why you insisted on picking this table.” You nudge your head to the window. 

“Being visible from the outside means bad business. Anyone can see in the window and spot you if the lighting is good enough. I chose this table because it’s concealed the most and closest to the door in case we need to make a run for it.” 

“So what, do we just leave without paying if someone comes in and tries to kill us?” 

You shrug. “Yeah, that’s pretty much it.” 

“That’s so unethical,” Sunghoon huffs in disbelief.

You laugh into your spoon. “Well that’s the life we have to live now. You learn to put aside your conscience and morals when trying to survive. Neglecting to pay for a meal is a small act of ungratefulness compared to saving your own life.” 

“I don’t even want to ask how many times you’ve had to do that.” 

He watches you lament. “I’ve been living like this for a long time, Sunghoon. That's all I know. I can’t afford to think about the what ifs because the future happens quicker than you expect it to. Knowing I get to sleep at the end of the day is the goal, but then I have to worry about what’ll happen when I open my eyes.

“Becoming your neighbor was my first taste of normalcy, in a sense. I still slept with a gun under my pillow and kept my door bolted shut with a cane underneath the handle. Every room in my apartment had a weapon in it should I ever need it.” 

Sunghoon winces. “I’m sorry it came to that.” 

“Me too,” you say, sipping from your spoon. “But that’s my life.” 

“If you hate it so much, why did you choose it?”

You look at him. “I didn’t.” 

“I assume this is a story for another time.” 

“You’re assuming correctly.” 

Sunghoon watches you slurp on your noodles. The soup is splashing inside the bowl and the steam is burning your tongue but you push through it, forcing yourself to chew and suck cool air into your mouth. You seem normal like this and Sunghoon’s heart softens when he thinks about what life would be like if the two of you weren’t on the run. 

“Tell me about yourself.” 

Sunghoon’s taken aback by your sudden question. “Myself?” 

You nod. “Who are you, Sunghoon?” 

It’s a loaded question and one he wasn’t expecting to hear from you. You’ve seldom made conversation in the couple of days since you two have been together, only asking him about the necessary things as they come up. Sunghoon’s the one who initiates small talk and shares what he’s thinking with you when the conversation falls flat. He’s learned to be okay with your silence. 

Hearing you ask him such a question sends him into deep thought. For a moment, Sunghoon imagines that the two of you are on a first date. He pretends you both agree to forego the fanciness of a five-star restaurant in favor of dressing comfortably and having no expectations other than good food and good company. 

You look so innocent in this light, so far removed from a world of danger that Sunghoon nearly deludes himself into thinking this fantasy of his is real. Your cheeks are full of noodles and your body is hunched over the bowl like any normal person would be. He pulls himself back before he could mourn his past. 

“I don’t really know where to begin. I have two parents, a mother and father, and a younger sister. I grew up in Suwon until I moved to Seoul for university. I hate my job and I really want to open a coffee shop one day.”  

“Why a coffee shop?”

“It’s the exact opposite of my life right now,” Sunghoon explains. “I won’t hear telephones ringing or be pulled into budgetary meetings for clients every second of the day. I’ll work for myself. I won’t have to stay later than I want to and I can talk to real people who I’ll actually give a shit about.” 

“That sounds like a really nice dream.”

“I’d probably call it ‘Soul Coffee’ because maybe I’ll have a soul by then,” he says with a short laugh. “I think I’d be happy waking up to work in a place like that instead of in finance. It feels like I’m living the same day over and over again. There’s no variety in my life because everyone expects you to stay later than the typical workday. It’s a shark-eat-shark world there. I’m sick of it. I’m tired of pretending to care about our morally-grey clients. Nothing about it feels…me.”

“Listening to commands is tiring, don’t you think?”

He sighs, exasperated. “You’ve read my mind. It’s like I’m a cog in a machine. I serve to benefit high society and make the rich, richer. There’s no morality in what I do. I have to look at the numbers I see pile across my desk everyday and pretend they mean nothing to me. If I start to think about how much money is being used to do ungodly things, I start to lose my mind. 

“None of my clients and colleagues seem to care about anyone but themselves. They compete with each other to see who can make it out on top the fastest without caring about who they hurt. It’s like they’ve lost their humanity.” 

“Survival of the fittest is everybody’s weakness. When the consequence of falling behind is termination, that alone can make people do things against their own will.” 

“They all seem like they’re running on autopilot, like they’re so used to it that they’re numb.” Sunghoon shakes his head. “I always thought I’d do something more creative with my life like photography, or something. I wasn’t too half bad at painting. I considered majoring in fine art but coming home for winter break was enough for me to reconsider that.”

“Why’s that?”

“My father's well connected in finance. He’s respectable and has set a lot of expectations for me. He wouldn’t hear it when I told him I wanted to be a photography major. He said it was nothing compared to having a stable job that you can depend on. It shattered my wellbeing and I knew there was no chance I could ever convince him otherwise.

“Living under your parents’ expectations is difficult. I have a younger sister who’s starting college soon and she wants to become a professional dancer. I can only imagine the conversations she must be having with our parents now. But I guess it’s all for the best, right? I have a good job that pays decently and a roof over my head. I can’t complain, really.”

“You can still mourn the life you could’ve had,” you tell him. “Just because you chose one path, that doesn’t mean you can’t be sad about a future that never was.” 

His eyes flicker to you when he hears an uptick in your voice. You look back with a melancholy gaze that's hard for Sunghoon to figure out. He watches as you divert your eyes from him when silence has passed and he thinks that’s peculiar. 

“I guess so.” 

The two of you finish your meal without a word spoken. He’s done eating just a minute quicker than you do, and patiently waits until you’ve discarded your utensils into the bowl in front of you. Sunghoon wonders if what he said must have made you uncomfortable, but the voice in his head is telling him you know more about what he’s feeling than you let on. 

With your expertise about being on the run and evading assailants, Sunghoon truly begins to wonder what your life must have been like prior to moving next to him. 

You break the silence.

“You’re a very resilient person, Sunghoon. I think your friends and family are very lucky to have you.” 

Sunghoon is speechless. 

“T-Thank you. I hope I can get to know you well enough to say nice things about you too.” 

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

The two of you decide to make a trip to the only convenience store in town before heading back despite it being farther away from the current hostel. It’s dark outside and even Sunghoon is starting to feel spooked when walking through the dead of night, distant lamp posts illuminating the night sky. He can’t tell what you’re thinking either. Most times, you wear the same expression and remain stoic until it’s time to go to sleep. It’s then Sunghoon can truly see just how tired you are. He wishes he could spearhead the planning to give you some time to rest. 

He learns that you’re resilient too. You push your body to its physical maximum. You’re able to think ahead and prepare everything you need before your head hits the pillow because the next day is never promised. Sunghoon, too, starts to push himself towards his breaking point and only thinks of surviving. 

Sunghoon catches you yawning as you shuffle items into the basket. He offers to hold it for you and picks out items he’s seen you purchase before. The cashier bids you farewell once the tab has been paid. The two of you make the trek back to the hostel under dimly lit lights in the middle of nowhere when you push Sunghoon forward until his face meets the ground below him. 

Already, the sound of a bullet piercing the air interrupts the tranquil atmosphere of the environment. He looks up to see a man inside of a car aiming his gun in his direction and covers your body with his when he realizes the armed stranger is about to take another shot. Sunghoon’s heart rate quickens when the bullet casings fall to the ground beside him. You clutch onto him until you’re able to find leverage and push him off of you to a spot you deem safe enough. 

There’s a single driver; no designated person as a gunman sitting shotgun and you’re sure this is an inexperienced soldier who’s out for blood. If not for the reckless aim, then for the insults he shouts at you when the bullets hit everything but you and Sunghoon. 

Sunghoon reckons your body is a mixture of adrenaline and strategy from your years of experience. It’s almost as though you move on autopilot and maneuver your way to the safest vantage point. He, on the other hand, is the polar opposite. He’s frozen in his spot and his body feels heavier than it is when you try to pull him to safety. Because of this, the last bullet from the gunman’s device ricochets off of a hard surface behind you and a small fragment of it becomes lodged in your arm. 

You yell in pain and clutch yourself when the metal touches your skin. When the gunman realizes his ammo is depleted, he swerves the car until his headlights blind you. Without a moment’s notice, you grab onto Sunghoon’s sleeve and pull him along with you, running until you see a crevice that’s small enough to fit the two of you. 

You run and run, ducking behind buildings and keeping Sunghoon close to you as you take cover behind dumpsters and other large objects that could shield you from the gunman’s vehicle. Your arm is in immense pain and you can feel your blood start to trickle out of your wound and down your elbow. 

When the gunman ceases his attempts to run after the two of you, you exhale. 

You check to see if the coast is clear and slide down the hard wall behind you until you’re perched upright when you deem it safe enough. The jacket you’re wearing does nothing to shield your arm from the bullet fragment and your skin looks like a bloody massacre when you take it off. 

Sunghoon can only stare at the wound. He’s at a loss for words when he sees your face contort in pain as your head hits the brick wall behind you. The tears pricking at your eyes damage his psyche and he feels utterly helpless. 

He watches you rummage through your backpack and tear off a portion of an unused shirt and as you wrap it around your arm. The blood’s soaking through the grey fabric and it causes him to panic. You aren’t screaming the way Sunghoon wants to. It scares him half to death. 

“Direct pressure on the wound cuts off the blood supply,” you tell him with a huff. He wants to help, but the sight of your blood dripping down your arm and onto the pavement below makes his feet stay planted where they are. Sungoon watches as you pull it tight with your teeth and secure it to the best of your ability. 

“Blood,” Sunghoon stutters. “There’s so much blood. We need to get you to a hospital.”

“No,” you immediately refute. “No hospitals. Going to a medical center means I’m documented, Sunghoon. They have to take my name and identification. Maybe yours too. We can’t risk going somewhere with security feeds to avoid being caught.” 

“So what do you propose we do, then? You’re fucking bleeding because you got shot!” 

“It’s just a graze wound,” you say through your teeth. “It hurts like hell, but I’ll be fine.” 

“Where do we go from here?” Sunghoon asks.

“Back to your apartment.”

“But you said it’s dangerous if we go back.”

“It’s less dangerous than going back to our hostel or finding a new one. People who see my arm are going to call the cops and going to a medical center is out of the question. I just need a safe place to fix myself.” 

Sunghoon knows better than to suggest hailing a taxi or using the metro to get back to his apartment. He pushes all morals aside when you instruct him how to hotwire a car from the street when he sees your bloody arm. When he successfully gets the engine to run, you climb into the passenger seat and he’s off retracing his steps to take him back to his apartment as best as he can. 

You try to stay awake. It hurts Sunghoon to hear you gasping in pain with your high-pitched cries when he hits a road bump. From the corner of his eye, he can see you biting your lip to keep your tears at bay as best as you cany. Your head rests against the car door as you watch the lights pass by you and he wonders what you’re thinking right now. For all of your reassurance that this is a normal part of your life, Sunghoon wishes it wasn’t. 

Eventually, Sunghoon finds his way back towards Seoul. As he approaches his former neighborhood, he can’t help but feel displaced. It’s odd to see familiar streets and department stores he frequents after making peace with the fact that he’ll likely never return. The lights that keep each billboard sign on feels foreign after spending days looking at wastelands. Sunghoon never imagined that he’d get the chance to see his old haunts. Not in this lifetime, anyway. 

It’s the dead of night and the lights surrounding the apartment are dimmer than usual. He’s grateful, in a way, because it means you two can get into the building from the back without being detected. Sunghoon leads you up the stairs, leading you by the sleeve of his jacket that he’s letting you wear. It’s soaked with your blood and you’ve had to use the fabric to prevent any more bleeding. He avoids looking at it, hating that you’re in so much pain and that you don’t even show it. 

“Hang on,” Sunghoon says when the two of you approach the door. Your face is growing weaker but he can hear voices coming from inside the room. “I hear someone inside.” 

They’re just loud enough for Sunghoon to recognize them. 

“Shit,” he mutters. “My friends are inside.” 

“Doesn’t matter,” you say, stumbling over your feet to press your forehead against his back. “I need to get in there and fix my arm before I pass out.” 

“Okay,” he says with a final nod before pushing the door open. 

Sunghoon’s guilt and shame wash over him when he sees Jay and Jake sitting inside. They look at him with anger and disappointment flashing across their faces as they see him standing in the threshold of his doorway. They don’t comment on the spattered red blood that’s halfway dry on his sleeve. Seeing his friends look at him with such betrayal makes Sunghoon feel like the worst person in the entire world. 

“What the actual fuck,” Jake speaks, cutting the silence. “Where the fuck have you been, Sunghoon?”

“We’ve been worried sick,” Jay adds. “You’ve been gone for a week. Where the fuck were you and what happened?”

“How did you guys get in here?” Sunghoon asks quizzically. 

“You gave me your spare key.” Jay fishes it out of his pocket and throws it on the counter beside him. “For emergencies, remember? We come in here to see your apartment is a mess. I’d count this as an emergency.” 

“Guys, I can explain–”

“You fucking better!” Jake exclaims, raising his voice a notch. “We were worried sick about you! Didn’t you check your texts? Why didn’t you call us? Are you in trouble?”

“Guys—”

“Cut the shit, Sunghoon. Friends don’t do that to other people, especially when we came here and saw your bedroom. It looks like a storm blew in here.” Jay shakes his head. “What the hell happened to you?” 

Sunghoon tries to apologize amidst the chaos. “You guys, really, I’m sorry–”

“You better be fucking sorry!” Jake shouts back at Sunghoon, who has dared to inch closer to the angry man in front of him. “Sunghoon, I swear to God. We’ve been brothers since college and I’ve been by your side through everything. The least you could have fucking done was let us know that you’re okay and–” 

“All of you better shut up unless you want to deal with me passed out on the floor,” you warn, slamming a gun on the table. It makes a horrendously loud noise that startles all three of them but it’s enough to garner their attention. 

Jake’s eyes are first to see your arm. You’ve taken off Sunghoon’s jacket and discarded it on the chair beside you, revealing the blood-soaked spectacle underneath. He sputters over his words, while Jay remains frozen in his spot. 

“Sunghoon,” you speak, voice heavy with your eyes shut together. “Do you have any alcohol?” 

“I-I have vodka” Sunghoon stutters. He stumbles backwards and grabs all of the bottles he can find.

“Sunghoon,” you say again through broken words and heavy breaths, “can you please get my backpack and the medical kit sashed underneath your touch?” 

“What the fuck?!” Jay exclaims. “We need to get you to a hospital.”

“No hospitals,” Sunghoon answers, putting the backpack on the table in front of you. He pulls out the kit and opens it for you. “Too much attention. We can’t afford that right now.” 

“What the fuck do you mean?” Jay retorts. “She’s clearly bleeding out! Y/N needs to see a doctor to get her arm patched up. She’s bleeding all over the fucking table!” 

Jay averts his gaze from Sunghoon when he hears you fish out a needle and thread. The gauze from your kit sits atop the counter and he winces when you peel back the fabric to reveal the wound. 

“Holy shit,” Jake mutters. “How are you still alive?” 

“It’s not fatal,” you explain. “It’s a flesh wound at best. Hurts like hell, but at least the bullet fragment didn’t lodge itself inside of me.” 

“Bullet?” 

“Can you make yourself useful and get me a cup?” 

Jake moves to the kitchen, too afraid of what you’ll do if he doesn’t obey your command. The sight of your bloody arm is enough to make him equal parts sick and panicked. The three boys in front of you are silent as they watch you unpack what you need. The room smells of sweat and iron, but neither of them dare to take their eyes off of your arm. 

“Do you have any spare towels I can use?” you ask Sunghoon. He wordlessly grabs them for you.

“This is crazy,” Jake mutters. 

“It’s about to get crazier,” you mumble, patting the blood on the skin that isn’t damaged. 

“Don’t tell me–”

“Yeah,” you say, unscrewing the top to the vodka bottle and pouring yourself enough liquid to temporarily calm your nerves. The boys watch as you tilt your head back to consume the vodka. “Somebody please put my hair up.” 

“How’s this gonna work?” Jake asks as Sunghoon ties your hair for you.

“Whenever the alcohol starts to kick in, I’m going to use the vodka to disinfect this arm and clear it to the best of my ability,” you explain. “Then, I’m going to stitch myself up.”

“What the fuck.”

“I’ve been in worse situations. I’ll be fine.” 

“You…You’ve done this before?” Jake asks. 

“Too many times to count. Now, I ask that you keep quiet and do as I say unless you want me to pass out. Do you understand?” 

Jay and Jake mumble agreements under their breaths. Sunghoon only nods. 

When you feel your shoulders start to relax, that’s when you force your body upright and grab the vodka again. You’ve done this enough times but the searing pain of alcohol being poured into your wound still hurts. Everybody hears the sound of the liquid dripping onto the floor mixed with your short whimpers of suffering. 

The boys feel helpless as they stare at you cleaning yourself up without assistance. It kills them to sit so immobile as you fight your pain in front of them. Your composure starts to crumble as the alcohol cascades down your arm and everybody is shocked to see you aren’t doubling in pain.

It kills Sunghoon to sit so powerless like he did when you first convinced him to leave with you. He can barely look at the blood spilling from your arm onto his table. His friends try to look away but can’t, eyes glancing back at you every so often. Sunghoon hates seeing you in pain like this and he resents that there’s nothing he can do to help you. He decides that he should look around his apartment for any listening devices in case the assailant comes back to finish the job.

He comes back a while later after searching the entire place, overturning even the smallest piece of decor he owns. His limited experience follows him from room to room, searching for audio devices in unassuming crevices and obvious places. When he feels confident that he did a thorough job, he returns to the living room to find the blood-soaked towels on the table and Jay holding a roll of paper towels. 

“I searched my place,” Sunghoon informs. “There should be no bugs or anything.”

“Bugs?” Jake asks quizzically.

“Audio devices or anything that could be used to listen in on us. You can never be too sure.”

“Good,” you comment weakly. Jay does his best to throw away everything he can in the trash and clean up too. 

The three boys sit in silence once more. Your winces short pained breaths are the only audible sound in the room. Sunghoon looks away every time the needle pierces your skin and wonders how you’ve built up a tolerance to this type of pain. His heart aches when he thinks about you doing this alone. 

“I need to eat or else I’m going to pass out. Do you have anything?” 

“All the food in the fridge is probably rotten by now,” Sunghoon mumbles. “One of us should get some food for tonight.” 

 “I’ll go to the store across the street and get something,” Jake volunteers, his stomach churning from the sight before him.

“Take Jay with you,” he hears you instruct. “From now on, we need to stay in pairs.”

“Sure thing,’ Jay nods. 

The two of them come back in record time. Sunghoon helps you sit upright when you fail to compose yourself and tries not to think anything of it when your head leans on his body. Your mouth quivers like you’re trying to keep yourself from crying in front of him.

Sunghoon opens a few of the packaged foods that his friends had bought, setting it far from where your arm is on the table. He beckons you to open your mouth and feed you flavorful crackers and other dry foods that won’t distract you from stitching yourself up. He feels your lips touch his fingers when he feeds you and Sunghoon feels like his body is on fire. 

You wipe your mouth with the back of your hand. “I’m sorry you have to see this.” 

“So this is why you’ve been gone?” Jay asks Sunghoon. “What the fuck happened to the both of you?”

“I guess now’s the best time to explain,” you say after a long beat of silence. “I owe you guys that much.” 

“That would be nice.” Sunghoon glares at his friend but you put your arm on him and shake your head. 

“Maybe we should let her concentrate so she doesn’t injure herself any more than she already is.” 

“Talking distracts me from the pain.” They sit in front of you quietly. Jay anxiously bounces his leg in his seat when you pull the needle through. 

Jake stares at your arm before looking up. “Who are you?” 

“There are a lot of bad people in this world who want to acquire power to the point of being drunk off of it, and there are bad people who carry out orders to ensure this power is transferred from one entity to another.”

“Which one are you?” Sunghoon stands from his seat when Jay looks at you with a hard expression but you shake your head. He backs down, sitting in his seat without a word. 

“The latter,” you say honestly. “I’m an independent contractor, of sorts. I’m somebody who has the physical means to push power in any direction my Command tells me to without question.” 

“Command?” 

“Command is the organization that employs me.”

“None of this makes sense, Y/N. Who are you working for? What line of work puts you in this kind of danger?” 

“I do things that get the job done,” you say, gritting your teeth as you pull a stitch taught. “I fight, steal, and harm anyone who gets in the way of a successful mission. My job is to succeed, Jay. My purpose is to win.” 

“H-Harm?” Jake chokes on his words. 

“By any means necessary.” 

“You’re not serious,” Jay comments. “None of this is real.” 

“All of it is real and it’s my life. It’s all I know and it’s what I grew up with.” 

Jake shakes his head. “All of this is so confusing to me. You’re saying that there’s an organization called ‘Command’ and you’re an independent contractor that carries out orders to complete a job. Just what kind of job do you have?”

“Do you see the state of my arm?” Jake nods. “What I do in my day to day life is serious business. My job changes everyday and there’s nothing I can’t accomplish. I do whatever is necessary to ensure that Command gains as much power and money as possible to keep a balanced order as we know it. I do bad things for bad people. Did, I should say.”

Sunghoon quirks an eyebrow. “What do you mean?” 

The last stitch stings. You tie it to the best of your ability and clean the wound until you can’t bear to stand the pain anymore. The boys in front of you gawk at you.

“I used to harm people if it meant serving the greater good according to Command.”

“What does that mean exactly?” Sunghoon’s voice quivers and you cast your eyes to the table.

“I think you know.” 

“That guy who broke into your apartment and tried to strangle you to death works for Command too, doesn’t he?” 

“I assume so. I didn’t recognize him but his combat style is similar to mine. I can only assume we come from the same place.” 

“That doesn't explain why he tried to kill you.” 

You shake your head. Sunghoon watches as your eyes become wet as you pat your wound dry, throat constricting from the pain in your arm and within your heart. 

“He didn’t try to kill me. He was trying to kill you.”

“Why me?” 

You speak above a whisper.

“Because I was taking too long.” 

The gears in his head turn as he looks at you from where he sits. Sunghoon feels like the reality around him has shattered into a thousand pieces. He can't seem to stitch back together as he looks between your arm and your face. For the first time since he’s known you, you can’t look him in the eye. 

It clicks for him. 

“Me?” Sunghoon asks incredulously. “You were sent to kill me?” 

You bite your lip. “That thumb drive your boss gave you contains years worth of documented payroll. Your colleagues and investors have been diverting funds from the company into a shell bank account for decades. This portion of money is used by Command to fund our missions and carry out any necessities to ensure anybody who petrays this organization sees the end of their life.” 

“That’s fucking crazy.” Sunghoon stands from his chair and walks around the living room. He looks at you like you’ve shattered his heart, as if the pieces are scattered onto the floor before him. “You tried to kill me?” The crack in his voice brings tears to your eyes. 

“I wasn’t going to. I’ve been like this since I was thirteen and didn’t know any better. If I wanted a roof over my head and food to eat, I needed to work for it. But you, Sunghoon…You are somebody I could never hurt.” 

“How the fuck am I supposed to believe that when you lived next door to me for months, waiting for the right time to kill me? What, were you gonna murder me in my sleep?” He runs his hands over his face. “Oh god, were you going to do something to me the night you came over? Is that why you agreed to hang out with me?”

“No!” you exclaim. “You were my daydream too, Sunghoon. You were the most normal part of my life where I didn’t have to think about my fake job as a security guard or mission updates on your wellbeing. You were my friend. You were somebody I wanted to trust.”

Sunghoon shakes his head. “I-I don’t believe you.”

“I’ve wanted out for so long,” you plead. “I don’t want to live this life anymore. I was sent on this mission with the hopes of acquiring that thumb drive but I don’t give a shit about that anymore. I don’t care about obeying orders. I don’t care about who holds power because only the worst of the worst are the ones who run the show.”

“You’re the worst of the worst!” Sunghoon exclaims. “God, I actually let myself fall for you even though we barely knew each other. I let myself trust you when we were on the run, and now what? Are you gonna rat me out to your Command? Are you going to bring my head on a silver platter to your master?”

“I would never,” you plead, hot, fresh tears rolling down your cheeks and the side of your face. “I don’t want to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you.”

“Yeah, well you’ve hurt me. Congratulations, Y/N.” 

Sunghoon walks into his bedroom with his back turned to you. Jay and Jake watch as you aggressively wipe the tears from your eyes and wince at the pain in your arm now that the alcohol is starting to subside. 

“That’s really fucked up, Y/N,” Jake says. “You were going to murder our best friend. How did you think Sunghoon was going to react?” 

You shake your head. “My entire life is order after order. I never make decisions for myself. I don’t live for myself. You have to understand that disobeying orders means you get killed and saving Sunghoon was the biggest risk I have ever taken in my life. It’s the first choice I’ve made for me, not for Command. The person who tried to kill us probably knew I went rogue. There’s a reason why he was shooting at both of us. I’m a target too.” 

“Wait, so someone tried to kill you tonight? For real this time?”

“Yeah, well you’ve hurt me. Congratulations, Y/N.” 

Sunghoon walks into his bedroom with his back turned to you. Jay and Jake watch as you aggressively wipe the tears from your eyes and wince at the pain in your arm now that the alcohol is starting to subside. 

You nod. “It won’t stop either. They’ll come looking for me and Sunghoon. He’s somebody who saw something he shouldn’t have and I’m a rogue assassin who betrayed her people. My head is on a platter too. The last thing I want to do is see Sunghoon dead.” 

Jay sighs. “This is really hard to believe. You can’t seriously think any of us will trust you after what you just told us.” 

“You have to,” you croak. “I wouldn’t risk my life by betraying Command to save Sunghoon and bring him out of town if I wanted to see him dead.”

“You have a point. But this all seems…far fetched.”

“It’s a lot to take in, I know. I don’t expect either of you to think positively of me or to believe in me. But I’m asking you to trust me if you want to see Sunghoon live. I can’t protect him if he doesn’t want my help.” 

“What makes you think you could protect him? Your arm is damaged and you don’t even know what you’re doing.” 

“I know people,” you tell them. “I have contacts all over the globe for doing favors and spending time in places for months at a time. And in the meantime, I have a friend who might be willing to help us start escaping Korea and find refuge where Command won’t find us.” 

“How do we know this person is trustworthy?” Jake asks. 

“We talk about this life, Heeseung and I,” you explain. “We grew up together. We’ve known each other since we were four and grew up learning how to fight hand-to-hand combat together. He’s seen me bloody and broken far too many times than I can count. You can’t trust many people in this line of business, but he’s saved me too many times for me to not trust him.” 

“This Heeseung person, is he close by?” 

“There’s an abandoned warehouse in the most southern part of Korea. Heeseung was supposed to oversee its demolition but told me he never did in the event that somebody needed refuge. As far as I know, the warehouse is still functional and he still operates from over there.” 

“So, what, are you and Sunghoon going to meet up with Heeseung and life will suddenly be fine?” 

“I don’t know.” You swallow harshly. “But I know that Heeseung is good at fixing wounds and funneling people and hiding. He is the only person I would risk my life to save and I know he’d do the same for me.” 

“You saved Sunghoon’s,” Jay comments. 

You bite your lip. “I would risk my life for him too. He was the first person that made me feel like a human being, like I didn’t have to be ashamed of my flaws or shortcomings. Everyday I imagined a life where we could be friends instead of leading the life that I do. Talking to him made me feel like I finally had the privilege of freedom. But then someone broke into the wrong apartment and involved both of us. I risked my life by saving him and now that Command likely knows I’m on the run with him, they’re out to kill us both.”

“Be honest with us. Are you willing to sacrifice your life to protect Sunghoon?” 

You meet Jay’s eye and answer him without hesitation.

“Yes.” 

“I don’t know if we can really trust you fully,” Jake stars, “but it sounds like you’re in trouble too. Killing Sunghoon now wouldn’t save your life, would it?” 

You shake your head. “Once a traitor, always a traitor.” 

Jay sighs. “Well, it’s not like you could kill any of us with a damaged arm. You should probably get some sleep and disinfect the arm. Sunghoon’s shower is just down the hallway. The towels are in the cabinet beside it.” 

They watch you stand up and bow in a ninety-degree angle despite the pressure it puts on your arm. You stand up to look at them with eyes full of sorrow and regret, the kind that has your lips trembling and eyes watering. 

“For whatever it’s worth, thank you for listening to me.” 

“Yeah, well we needed answers.” 

You let a tear fall. “I’m sorry.” 

“Answer this for me,” Jake asks. “Why did Heeseung keep the facility and what’s he using it for, really?” 

You bite your lip. “I heard through the grapevine that there have been talks about an uprising to take down Command. There are dozens of people like me, people who are tired of being ordered to kill and perform other horrendous acts against humanity. Heeseung and I often talk about abandoning our post but neither one of us had the courage to actually do it.”

“But you did.” 

“After I met Sunghoon, yeah. I’ve never lived in an apartment before. It’s always small hostels or hotels until the job is over, and then I return to base camp where everything feels like a prison. Living next to Sunghoon let me develop a routine where I deluded myself into thinking I could have a future like that someday.”

“So you just…gave up that life?” 

“I suppose so.”

“This uprising,” Jay says, “what’s it going to accomplish?” 

“If done right, then Command will be wiped out of existence. This means no paper or digital trail. All backlogs are demolished and everyone who wants to be free, will be free.”

“That’s a lot to ensure no one targets your back.” 

“There’s only one person who gives out orders,” you explain. “Everyone else are pawns who’ve been kidnapped and bred to become the type of people we are today. Nobody wants to live this lifestyle. Nobody wants to die a killer.” 

“Okay,” Jay says after a moment of silence. “But I think it’s best if you freshen up and get some sleep. 

Jake sighs when he hears the bathroom door close. 

“What are we gonna do? If Y/N hadn’t stitched herself up in front of us, I’d call bullshit and tell Hoon to move out of this building.”

“I don’t know what to feel either,” says Jay. “I don’t trust her because she just told us she was sent to kill him but you saw how well she kept herself together just now. She could’ve killed him and gotten that thumb drive whenever she wanted to.” 

“I don’t trust her either, but she said her life is on the line whether or not Sunghoon is dead. She could’ve done something to him but she hasn’t. I don’t have a good feeling about this.” 

Jay sighs for the umpteenth time. “For now, let’s just try to make sure Sunghoon and Y/N aren’t anywhere near each other tonight. I know she could probably kill us all in our sleep but we would’ve been dead by now if she didn’t trust us.” The two boys look at your gun, which is still sitting on the table. 

“You’re right,” Jake agrees. “She should take Hoon’s guest bedroom and rest up. I can’t imagine how much pain she’s in. You should probably be the one who talks to him, too. He always listens to you.” 

Jay laughs humorlessly. “Yeah, you’re right. Let’s stay the night just in case. Lord knows we don’t need those two killing each other.” 

Jake leaves to prepare the guest bedroom and calm his nerves away from the bloody table. Jay walks to Sunghoon’s bedroom door and raps his knuckles against the wood. 

“Hoon, open up,” Jay beckons. “It’s me.” 

It’s quiet for a moment until he hears Sunghoon’s feet shuffling behind the door. 

“If you’re going to tell me to forgive her and move on, forget it.” Jay walks into the room when Sunghoon doesn’t close the door in front of him. 

“I wasn’t going to. You have every right to feel the way you do. I wanted to check in and see how you’re doing.” Sunghoon bites back a snarky comment, knowing his anger isn’t redirected at Jay. 

“I feel so fucking betrayed. I feel like my life is over and there’s nothing I can do to get back the time I had. I wish I never met Y/N and I wish I never opened that stupid fucking thumb drive because then I wouldn’t be in this mess.” 

“Take is easy, okay?” Jay says. “I know that’s virtually impossible given the circumstances, but there’s nothing you can do right now. Y/N’s in the shower and Jake’s preparing the guest room for her now.” 

“I want this to be over. Or better yet, I just want someone to end my misery.” 

Jay sits next to Sunghoon on his bed, knocking his shoulder against his. “Don’t say that. You’ve survived and gotten this far. It’s only fair that you see it through and make it out alive.”

“But what does that even mean?” Sunghoon asks, exasperated. “The end could be years from now. I don’t even know what I’m fighting for. I can’t stay here long or they’ll find me and murder me. I don’t even know what Y/N’s end goal is. We’ve been running for so long and I didn’t know any of her intentions until tonight.” 

“I can’t speak for her and I won’t because who she is, isn’t someone I’d want in your life,” Jay begins. “But she’s dead whether or not you are. If you die and the mission is complete, her head is still on a platter because she disobeyed her orders. 

“I’m not telling you to trust her because of who she is, but I’m telling you that it seems like she truly doesn’t want you to get hurt. She waited for months to even talk to you and never made a point to involve you in any of this before you disappeared. Y/N told us she has a contact that could potentially help the two of you with your predicament, and that’s the best that I can see for the time being. Part of me thinks she means what she says.”

“What if she’s lying?” 

“No one can be sure of that. But what I know is that it’s late and you look like you haven’t slept in ages. Take a shower once Y/N’s done and get some shut eye. Jake and I will be here when you wake up.”

“I hate that she’s using my shower,” Sunghoon grumbles. 

“What you hate is that you still like her, even after all of this.” 

Sunghoon groans. “Stop reading me. You’re a freak for always being right.” Jay laughs.

“I’m really glad you’re okay. You had us worried sick and we thought we’d never see you again.” Sunghoon opens to talk but Jay shakes his head. “You don’t need to explain anything to me after what we just went through with Y/N and her arm. Get ready for bed and then get some sleep.” 

Jay departs from Sunghoon’s bedroom, leaving him alone with his thoughts. He can hear the sound of their feet shuffling outside when the impending tiredness overwhelms him unexpectedly. When he’s sure you’re not occupying the bathroom, Sunghoon takes a quick shower and relishes being in his own bathroom with hot water. He lets the steam soak into his skin before drying himself off and brushing his teeth.

Sunghoon chooses to slip underneath the covers in his bedroom. You’re out cold in the guest bedroom next to his while Jay and Jake volunteered to take watching shifts. The only thing he can hear is the soft hum of the wind from outside. It feels peaceful and serene. But this tranquility makes him uncomfortable. He’s starting to understand why you work well under pressure.

As he melts underneath the covers, Sunghoon allows his heavy eyes to close shut. He dreams of nothing. 

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

The smell of sausages brings Sunghoon out of his slumber. Being somewhat well-rested feels foreign to him as he walks out of the bathroom performing his morning routine like any other day. It feels odd to look at himself in his mirror, putting on face products that have sat untouched for a week.

Jake is frying eggs when he walks into the kitchen area while Jay is prepping the bowls and utensils. Sunghoon watches silently as the two work in tandem to prepare gyeran bap with sausage on the side. The scent makes his mouth water. 

“Morning,” Sunghoon croaks. “Is Y/N still sleeping?” 

“Last I checked,” Jay says with a nod. 

“Good. I don’t know if I can face her right now.”

“You’ll need to eventually.” 

“I know.” Sunghoon sits in a chair and slumps over the table, which is significantly cleaner than when he last saw it. “Everything feels too fresh.” 

“Y/N probably feels the same,” Jake says. “She sounds like she wants out of whatever business she finds herself in. I’m not defending her or anything, but you heard her. She grew up in this lifestyle so I can’t imagine how hard it must be to break away from something you’ve always known.”

“Still.” 

Sunghoon eats his breakfast in silence with Jay while Jake volunteers to wake you up and help you with changing your bandages. They’re done eating by the time you emerge and Sunghoon can’t find it in himself to look at you, keeping busy by playing with his fingers. He feels your eyes on him and ignores the guilt that gnaws in his chest when he pretends you aren’t there, eating your breakfast next to him.

“We need to talk about next steps,” Jake says, cutting the tension. “You two obviously can’t stay here since it’ll be a liability for your safety. Hoon, you probably can’t go to your parents’ and neither Jay or I have enough space for you guys in the long run.” 

“Y/N mentioned an abandoned warehouse that was salvaged and is fully operational,” Jay tells Sunghoon. “She knows someone there she trusts that might be able to help you two escape Korea or stay hidden long enough.”

Sunghoon huffs. “Trust. Sure.” 

“It seems like your best bet.” 

“Please Sunghoon,” you beg. “Please choose to continue living.” 

He sighs. “It’s hard to hear you, of all people, say that to me.” 

You nod. “I know. I’m sorry. I don’t think I’ll ever say anything that will make things better but being on the run is what I’m good at and this isn’t an opportunity we can pass up” 

He looks up at his friends. “So this is it, huh? I’m just…never going to see you guys again?”

Jay and Jake share a look. 

“Well…” Jake draws out, rubbing the back of his next. “Not quite.”

“What do you mean?”

“We’re coming with you,” Jay says. 

“What?” Sunghoon says incredulously. “No you’re not. You guys can’t risk your lives just to save mine.”

“Y/N told us about this uprising,” Jay explains, “to take down Command and end this organization for good. I’d be a fool not to be part of it after knowing what they put you through.” 

“Our lives truly mean nothing if we ignore this and pretend people aren’t suffering,” says Jake. “Y/N can’t carry the burden alone.” 

He finally looks at you. “You’re going to take down Command?” 

“I’ll probably die trying, but yes. We can leave Korea but I can’t in good faith leave it here where more people die and suffer every single day.” 

“This person she knows is someone who’s all for the uprising too,” says Jake. “If your next logical step is to hide away in his warehouse until life becomes more quiet, I think we should go too.” 

“You can’t,” Sunghoon says, shaking his head. “You two have lives here, for God’s sake.” 

“None more than you did.” 

He looks at you. “Why are you encouraging them?” 

“I’m not,” you say. “But I know two ambitious people when I see them. If they’re willing to help me with my mission, I’d be stupid to turn them down.” 

“This is batshit. You can't just leave everything behind for me.” 

Jay smiles. “It’s what friends are for, right?” 

He knows there’s no use arguing when his friends are looking at him like they’ve already made up their minds. Sunghoon averts his eyes to see you with your arm slung on the table and then back to his friends, and sighs. 

“Welcome to the team. Let’s pray we don’t die.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

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[vampiretendencies]

request; omg can we get one where it’s like that one trend on tiktok where the girls wearing lipstick n it goes to her bf w kisses on his face😭😭😭 PLEASE I KEEP SEEING IT EVERYWHERE

warnings; fluff, maybe suggestive

pairing; jj x fem!reader

authors note; i’ve seen the tiktoks too my fyp is obx and couples rn :,) love this, thank u for sending this in. after the day i’ve had i enjoyed writing something small and pure. and i accidentally posted your ask when trying to save to drafts i ended up posting it so i hope u still see this <3

lipstick tiktok (example)

“The red lipstick is new, baby.”

JJ’s voice was raspy, having sat in that same criss crossed position for around an hour, on the carpeted floor beside you, whilst you brushed makeup products gently to your skin. Detailed review of the products you typically use, and that deep rouge lipstick was not one of them.

You were sat at your vanity, preparing for a party at the boneyard. It was the last get together for the summer, so you were tedious in being sure that this makeup look was one to remember.

He resembled that of a small child, the way he’s been beaming up in astonishment. Admiring every move you make to enhance the impeccable beauty you already had to start with. And reminiscing at the fact that you were his, truthfully his in every way.

“Mhm,” you breathe, deciphering wether or not you should take the risk of wearing the color or not. Typically sticking to nudes and neutrals, this was something out of your comfort zone.

“You gonna’ wear it?”

“Should I?”

He gives you a ‘you would look perfect wearing a fucking trash bag, did you really just ask me that’ look. His hand grasps your thigh, thumb reassuring you against your flesh, with small circular motions. Replacing his thumb with his chin, you feel the bone dig into the thick skin— this required a better view than the one he had.

“Course’ pretty girl,” he batted his eyelashes with promise. “Now put that shit on, m’waiting.”

At that, you hesitantly take the top off of the black capsule. Twisting it up for more of the substance, revealing an untouched dark bloody shade of deep red— the most powerful shade. Divine femme fatale, if you will.

JJ could’ve sworn he shattered into a thousand bits, bursting at the seams. The way your mouth parted open delicately to apply it, so intimate and sensual.

Being that it was pigmented you merely needed a few strokes. To JJ’s dismay though, he wanted to rewind that moment, bringing it in closely to store in his brain for the long run.

Open at an angle so sacred he could sob from the sheer euphoric look.

“So fuckin’ sexy,” he can’t help the words that spill past his lips. Nearly in a trace, and he swore he felt drool leave his mouth.

“Yeah?”

You snap the cap back on, standing from the stool, sliding it inward, and JJ follows suit. Someone that was melting moments ago is now towering over you.

“Definitely baby.”

Sort of repaying him in a way, you flash a toothy grin at him, lipstick effortlessly lining your plump lips— you lean forward cupping his jaw with your palms. JJ happily obliged, not caring about the stains the redness would leave on his features. He couldn’t have asked for anything more, actually.

Your lips pucker softly, pressing kisses to every inch of skin you could reach on his face. From the small freckles that littered his jawline to the top of his forehead that was fanned by the tufts of his blonde tresses. Everywhere.

His heated cheeks. Kiss.

The button-like tip of his nose. Kiss.

His chin. Kiss.

His longing lips. Kiss.

Your mouth shape reflected on his tanned face, intricate lining of your lips, every crevice. Fragile and slow with each and every kiss.

Catching your breath, both you and JJ peer into the vanity mirror. He pulls you into his side chuckling at the reflection. His pretty face, painted in the marks of your lips. Yours, lipstick smeared with swollen lips.

This was when JJ strongly believed in the saying of ‘ruin her lipstick, not her mascara.’

“Gotta wipe it off now, J.”

You reach for a makeup wipe, not wanting your boyfriend to embarrass himself at the event to come. But he forces you into his chest to peer up at him, causing your eyebrows to knit together.

“Leave it.”

He adored the lingering sensation of your lips to the subtle skin. Wanting every part of him to be a reminder of you.

So that anyone that walks pass him could clear as day see, he desperately belonged to his lover.

“Really J, let me wipe-“

“I said leave it, baby.”

[starillusion13]

KEEP IT A SECRET

Pairing: stepbrothers! Jeno and Jaemin x f!reader

W.C: 13k (I want them please)

Genre: SMUT, YANDERE, STEP-CEST

Warnings: possessive behavior, restraining hint, manhandling(?), pervert!nomin, dom!nomin, biting, tiny bit of blood, sucking, crying, a bit of pain during it, nipple play, clit and tit stimulation, oral( f. Rec), lot of lot of overstimulation( 😉), double penetration, praising and name calling, raw penetration( don’t do irl guyz💀)

Network: @k-vanity @cultofdionysusnet

Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated 😭. Applause to the ones who come up to me to interact and they know how friendly I am. Okay enough!

MINORS LETS BE INNOCENT AND NOT INTERACT! Okay?🔞

*under the cue*

Stepbrothers are same as brothers, Right? Just you need to maintain a step away from them from being too close to them if you somehow feel uncomfortable or unwanted, afterall they are not related to you by blood. Yes, that’s what you have lectured yourself before coming to this grand house where you are sitting with bored eyes staring at the screen. You don’t even remember why you have come to the living room and sat there in first place but now regretting as to why you remained in that place instead of going to your room to find something more useful than facing the idiots who just entered through the big wooden door.

Your step-brothers. Maintain that step.

Since the first day, you came here after your beloved mother married her childhood best friend, your life is literally pathetic. Your parents never had that lovely little family couple relation in between them and you somehow hoped them to get separate and when you were in highschool, they finally parted their ways much to your liking. Somewhere, in the corner of your mind, you still missed that fatherly love and your mother did notice it as she also felt alone when seeing others being happy with their partners. After two months, her best-friend started coming to your house more often to check on both of you and your mother gladly welcomed him each and every time. Once, you eavesdropped on their conversation when coming back from school and then realized their life story.

Basically, they are those childhood sweethearts and had so many dreams to spend their life together. Unfortunate events led them to move apart and during those times, you mother was being married to your father and her lover went overseas for future plannings and under family's peer pressure, he also got married there. They didn’t have contact with each other until they again met at a fancy restaurant with their own little families. Somehow, they talked about their situation and accepted their fate. They again back to being friends. He somehow noticed that your mother was not happy in her life but what could he do when he was the one who left her to her miseries. When you were in primary school, her friend left for the states with his wife again and then again, she was never able to meet him. You don’t remember much about them from your childhood memories but when you met with your mother’s friend after your father left you, the memories flashes across your mind.

Never in your high school life, you ever thought of them getting married. You could see how she used to share every detail of her life with her friend and you were glad that she could talk about her problems to someone with whom she feels safe and most comfortable. That time, you also noticed that how her friend was meeting all alone with your mother instead of bringing his wife along, you didn’t think about it much but gradually you came to know that his wife was no more due to mishap. That was the main reason for them to reunite again and could find comfort within each other’s warmth. You were literally so happy for them, if they were more verbal to their family about their relationship then they could have lived a more blessed life since long ago but its okay, everything happens for a reason and maybe this reason could lead them to a better life. Eventually, after your completion of school, they brought up the topic about their marriage and surprisingly, you agreed with it instantly. You were happy to get a father who actually showed the fatherly love towards you and also you were thankful to him to love your mother so much.        

But maybe for you, two devils escaped from the hell that day. Girl, you didn’t know that the man who was building a paradise for you and your mother can also bring two devils of hell into that paradise. After marriage, when you three shifted to a different country, you came to know that your two lovely step-brothers are also shifting there to settle down with your family. First, you thought about getting two little brothers because you didn’t know in the first hand that he had child rather two sons and you hoped to see them but the next when you came to know about their age and they are handling all the business schedules and meetings of their father’s company, your head hit hard. Well they are the heirs of all your step-father’s company but now you are also part of it and you didn’t know it yet but the first introduction with your step-brothers and getting to know about the inheritance was not like how you expected.

“So, you are the pretty heir and the third inheritor of this huge property?”

“I am?....I don’t know about this.”

“Really? But dad has prepared every document for you and you are unaware of it? This is strange. If you are not here for the property then what the hell are you doing in my house?”

“Excuse me but this is my house as well. I am your sister so I should be here.”

Don’t forget you are just a step-sister.

“Interesting.”

A great physique wearing a white t-shirt complimenting each bump of the muscles and an eyebrow slit making his dark look more intimidating. His gaze was burning on your exposed skin and the aura radiating from him was so daring as well. That day, you knew that it was best to ignore the older one in that household because you feel so weak in front of that powerful presence around you. Somehow, you hoped for the other one to be a bit handful and friendly but unfortunately, it didn’t go like that. One day when your parents were out and only Jeno was there, chilling in the wide living area, you noticed it and made your way back to the garden family zone which is your favorite spot but not likely today. You just wanted to relax yourself in your room after having long classes in the university but you didn’t want to face your so called brother all alone in that mansion so until your parents were coming back, you opted to kill time in the garden. It was pretty much okay unless the other devil appeared in front of you disturbing your peaceful time.

“What’s a pretty baby doing here?”

This boy and his name calling.

“That’s none of your concern.”

“It is my concern when you are doing every possible stuff to ignore my brother. It hurts my feelings when you are avoiding that handsome brother of mine who can get every girl around here or anywhere even you…”

“What the hell? Just go away and let me relax.”

“Uh ah…NO. I cant let my one and only dear sister to be here outside in the late evening. Its getting dark and anything can happen when the surrounding falls black and its only you and me making the white spot.”

You could feel him leaning towards you slowly with each word falling from his mouth while kneeling in front of you to match your level sitting on a low rock seat. You pushed him when he fell back and balanced himself on his two hands, laughing at your flustered face which you were trying your best to hide from him.

“What type of bullshit you are saying? Get the fuck away Jaemin.”

“And if I don’t?”

“I will shout and tell that….that you are…you….I..I was..”

“Is my dear sister lost? Are you lost babygirl?”

His smirk is wide enough to fuel your anger more and your fist tight on your lap, nails digging in your palm, making the skin reddish all around. He stared at you for a while and stood up, dusting his pants while he could still feel the glares from you to which he had no effect rather he chuckled on the fact.

“What are you upto?”

“Nothing. Just go inside and don’t stay out. Jeno is just a human like you and me so he wont be feeding on you in the dinner.”

You frowned on his words and he smiled to your confused face and walked away. Did he just call himself and me at a same level? No way. I mean we are human but we both can't be same. He is that shitty human like his brother and the way Jeno always have a dark expression, you doubt that he might feed on you. Does your mother trust your new brothers so much that she left you alone with them? Stomping your feet, you walked into the house to find both of your brothers sitting on the sofa and laughing at their phone screen, maybe again watching some weird stuffs. You glanced towards the stairs and ran towards it when the not so lovely of your brother spoke up.

“What were you doing outside?”

“Didn’t Jaemin tell you that I don’t want to face you? Yes. I was avoiding you.”

You didn’t dare to look back to them, you were just hoping to escape the place that moment and lock yourself inside the room until your parents come back.

“And why?”

You didn’t speak anything but could feel both of their stares boring onto your back so you took some slow steps.

“I asked you something. Without entertaining my questions, you are again going away. Does our baby need some punishments to behave well?”

Hearing the last sentence, you ran to your room without caring what would happen next but you just made your strong opinion on not unlocking the door unless one of your parents come upstairs.

You are always been called out with endearments by Jaemin. He is the biggest flirt in the household. He might be the one with soft, playful and flirty nature but his intentions are always transparent and your parents appreciate his clinginess towards you. ‘Jaemin loves his sister so much. I am so glad they are getting along so well with each other.’

Well, only you know how that tease actually shows his brotherly love to you. He always has that intimidating lustful eyes following your every movement around the house and whenever you catch him for it, he would just simply give you his teasing smile and winks at you before walking away with smug look.

Whereas his brother Jeno, well you just know about him that however possible you need to avoid that individual because you cant read him like Jaemin. He always has that dark expression with clenched jaws and piercing eyes. When Jaemin’s stare feels like tickles on your skin like a winter warmth, Jeno’s eyes burn on your skin like a blazing sun in summer. The cold replies to your every question and whenever your parents are in front, he would watch you as if every mishap in the world is caused by you. Every reason is you for his life problems. You still don’t know whether he is happy with your presence or not and moreover it is okay for him to introduce you as his sister to everyone. Jaemin happily shows everyone that you belong to his family and Jeno just agree with him by nodding his head slightly but they never mentioned the actual relationship that you are their ‘stepsister’.

It's always ‘she is one of us’ or ‘she is our family’ for them.

“How was your Gym workouts my sons?”

“it was good mom.” Jaemin brightly smiled to his step-mom.

“Yeah it was.”

“Why are you so down Jeno? Are you tired?”

“He is just sulky mom. He is mad because he is not getting the appreciation he needs from his favorite person, you know.”

“Gym crush?”

“No… it’s-“

“Jaemin. You are going to shut up right now.”

 If Jeno’s glare could burn Jaemin then he would have turned into ashes that instant but maybe his sweats saved him and his laugh echoed throughout the dinning room. Your attention got averted towards the noise coming from the presence of three lovely beings conversing among themselves.

“Y/n. come and eat with us, you will be late for the outing.”

Your mother has called you many times to have the lunch because later this evening, you will be going out with your friends but before that you need to complete some assignments and your mother wont let you do so without you having the lunch on time.

“mom, told you that I’m not hungry. I will be in my room and if you need me just call me downstairs.”

Standing on your feet, you collected your ipad and phone from the sofa and made your way towards the stairs. The brothers shared a knowing look before speaking up and halting your steps.

“You are not leaving now.”

“Why is it your concern jeno?”

“This is our concern Y/n. You are our sister and skipping meals is not good for your health. Eat now. I will help with your assignments later so come here.”

“Jaemin you don’t have to.”

“Look. Your brothers are always taking care of you and this is so nice that he will also be helping you with your works.”

“But mom-“

“Y/n, don’t be stubborn.”

“Fine.”

As it had to be. You had your lunch with them, having some conversations from here and there. Your mother happily listened to your every word like usual but surprisingly your brothers were also interested in the topics. Even, Jeno stated some opinions regarding some issues and this is the first time, you felt grateful about his presence. He is not the type to have family time and moreover having conversations with any one of you other than his brother, Jaemin. Well, this other one is always a nosy one in everyone’s business so it’s natural to have him in the dining family times. During the whole lunch, you could feel two burning stares on your skin, your brothers stealing glances of you and your mother is always unaware of all these.

When going back to your room, you could feel someone is following you upstairs and you are well aware of the person, who it might be. Well, as he has promised earlier, he would definitely help you in your assignments. You didn’t mind him following but something about his stares, making you uncomfortable in your place.

Entering your room, you quickly head towards the table to gather all your required stuffs for the work while he made himself comfortable on the edge of your bed. His hands caressing the bedsheet and humming to himself with closed eyes.

“Where are you going anyways?”

You didn’t pick up his question as you are busy typing some texts in your group chat when you feel someone snatches your phone away from your grip and held it higher.

“What the hell? Give it back to me Jaemin. You are here to help me not to irritate me.”

“I was asking you a question but you just ignored me and was busy on this useless thing.”

“I was texting someone and I’m sorry that I didn’t hear you.”

He glanced to the phone in his hand, which was still raised above and squinting his eyes, he is trying to read the messages. You could see his raised eyebrows and tongue poking his cheeks.

“You are going out with all boys?”

“That’s not your issue.”

“Did mom allow you?”

“Oh gosh. Why are you asking so many questions? Are you going to help me now or not? If not then get the fuck out of my room.”

“What help do you need exactly?”

“huh?”

You are standing on your toes to match his level to get back your phone but your feet touched the floor on hearing his words. You should not feel like this but his tone is different than before and it’s a bit more seductive and you could feel him closing the distance between you both. You step back with every proceeding of his step towards you. You bumped on the chair in front of the desk and your hands grabbed the top of it tightly in the back, you are totally trapped. He leans forward and caged you, hands gripping the desk behind.

  “Wha…what..do you need?”

He leans to your ears and his hot breath fanning over it when he whispered.

“That’s really up to you. How do you need me?”

“I need…help…in my assignment.”

“yeah and?”

He stares at your eyes in a way as if he is trying to hipnotize you.

“and?”

“Answer the rest of the questions I have asked you. Be a good girl. Will you?”

He repeated his questions while caressing your cheeks and somehow you were leaning to his touch even when you know whatever you both are doing is wrong. This is not how a brother and sister treat each other.

“I am going out with my old friends who are in this town and they want to meet with me so I will be back late at night.”

He stares at you for a few moments as if he is processing your words. Suddenly, he comes near to your face to match your eye level, staring so deeply as if he could read your past life and can possess your soul anytime. You can feel his lips just a breath away from yours and this is the first time, you are so much close to your brother, well just a reminder step-brother. Tugging your hairs slowly behind your ears, his fingers sliding over your cheeks to feel every little detail of the texture, you closed your eyes on the impact. Your heart beat increasing with every passing second and you can feel him smiling at your current state. You are hoping to end this situation quickly like you can push him or just like any other time, you can just reply him back savagely but somehow your body not reacting to do any of this rather accepting him and letting him to have his ways with you. Your thoughts got interrupted when you could feel something warm on your lips. His lips. He kissed you. It was a quick kiss as if a dream which flickered in the daylight. He steps back and brushes his hair with a smug look as if he has achieved his thing which he desired for so long.

The room is quiet. Really quiet or maybe you are suddenly deaf to your surroundings. Your bedroom is quite big but still its suffocating you at the moment as if the walls are closing in and the daylight fading out, making you a completely abandoned soul in this lively household.

But your mind is screaming that YOUR STEPBROTHER HAS JUST KISSED YOU.

“Earth to Y/N.”

You were so distracted that you didn’t notice how your fingers are touching your lips as if you are judging whether those are real or fake or if it yours in the first place. Looking over to the person, you can see him already has arranged everything for your work and smirking at you, sitting on the bed. As if nothing happened just few seconds back.

“….Jaemin…why….”

“Don’t you need my help anymore? You know I can help you in every possible way but till then lets focus on this. Come here.”

How can you just go near him again after what happened earlier? But him pretending like this as if he didn’t kiss his sister few minutes earlier and now like a big brother offering his help for homework for his little sister. With slow steps, you went near the side of the bed to which he pats the space beside him and hesitantly, you sit there.

One and a half hour has passed with you being stuck with him in your room doing your assignment. Every moment was torturing you as if every minute was passing like an hour with him. His every lingering touch was igniting a spike inside you like while him showing you how to solve a math problem and while peeking into the laptop, his palm resting over your exposed leg, your mind was focusing on everything except your work. You were trying your best to divert your mind from all the unholy thoughts that were going across your mind every second, but nothing was helping when his presence was so close to you.

“I know what you are thinking right now but only if you didn’t have to go out with your friends then we could have done something you know.”

“What?”

“You know what I meant?”

You just want to punch off that smirk from his face but you don’t want to create more memories of spending time with him for so long for the first time in your room so you just have to patiently handle the situation right now.

“Jaemin, the thing for which you were here is done so now you can go out because I have to get ready. Its not like you can help me in that.”

“I can.”

“Very funny.”

His smug look changes into a dark expression and you swear, him in this contrast look is something which scares you off the most even scarier than Jeno. That one has always that grumpy and intense look so you are used to it but when this flirt becomes like him, a shiver runs down your spine. His soft expressions always hide those bulky muscled body with veins on display on hands and necks. You never had a proper look of their abs but you hope to see the effects of the gym though. Like whenever, they swipe their hairs after having fun in the swimming pool, you would always stare at their muscles and face but you just divert your eyes whenever the abs come in display to you. Your fault to miss the free shows.

“Nothing is funny here baby. As I said I would help you means I will definitely. Now show me what you got baby.”

“Jaemin-“

He walks over to your closet and before you could protest, he slides open the door standing there with raised eyebrows and smiling face.

“You have quite a good collection of……everything.”

You hurriedly go in front of him and shut it close on his smirking face, eyes scanning your body to which you just glared him back. But well Jaemin didn’t budge to it, he goes to the next door and now it revealed the actual dress section not your lingerie and undies.

You observed his actions keenly to understand his motives. You can see him having his whole focus into your closet and you walk over to the bed to sit on it and watch him. Is it because of the kiss or for spending so much time with him that suddenly you are finding his whole existence as a blessing in your life?

His pretty eyelash making his eyes more attractive when they are focused on anything. His smooth skin with attractive nose and lips with that pretty smile. Did I just mention his smile pretty? Well not gonna lie however that smile irritates you but you find it really cute, a healing one. Your university friends have mentioned about your stepbrothers being so hot and handsome and they even pointed out that if they were in your place, they might have ended up dating them instead of maintaining the brother and sister image. But you are sure that those things are never going to happen between you and your stepbrothers maybe because you might find them attractive but its not like that’s the same from their end. Right?

“Take this. Give me a show and let me see in which one you will look the prettiest.”

“Are you serious right now?”

“100 percent.”

He is standing in front of you with few clothes in his hands and as far as you can see those are some skirt, shirt, tees, one denim jeans and two dresses. The way he is grinning at you as if he is an elementary school boy who got his long-awaited present. Wait. He got his present. What the hell I am thinking?

“There is no need of this. I can choose myself.”

Putting the clothes beside you, he holds your hand to pull you up on your feet and pats your cheek with both the hands, still having that smile on his face.

“Be a good girl or you wont be going out today. Alright?”

“You cant be serious.”

“Till the time I’m being nice to you just go with it or you have to regret it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well I will not look while you are changing so after you have dressed yourself in one, ask me to turn around.”

“But-“

“What did I just say?”

“…okay…”

He went over to your desk and sat on the chair with one hand leaning over the desk and other hand handling the phone, keeping himself busy. You kept standing near the other side of the bed still staring at the clothes lying over your bed. Am I really going to do this? What did he mean by being nice and you have to regret? Shaking off your thoughts, you cautiously dressed yourself in the skirt and a matching shirt he has selected with it. His every little movement was making you freeze in your spot. Changing your dress in presence of your step-brother in closed room is really challenging even more when he kissed you earlier. You look over to the mirror and damn, he has a good sense in fashion. You smiled to your outfit and then remember that you have to ask him to turn around.

Gulping, you call out his name, “jae-Jaemin…I’m ready.”

He quickly swivels on the chair to face you and eyes directly made a strong contact with yours before scanning your outfit. His furrowed eyebrows and thoughtful expression making you to adjust your dress properly.

“No. Change it. Keep the shirt on but wear the jeans.”

Before turning around, he winks at you. Your glare was digging hole in the back of his head but it was useless as he would not budge with that little thing.

“Stop glaring at me and change. Do it fast. I’m sure, you don’t want to be late or like miss out today’s outing.”

He is still turning his back to you but you could feel his smug look mocking at you. Kicking your feet, you quickly changed your skirt with the pant. The previous look was giving off a sexy and cute look altogether but this one is suggesting tumblr fashion. Calling out his name again, he stands up and comes near to you. Your heart starts racing with the thought what happened when last time he came to you like this.

“stop there.”

But he didn’t.

“I said stop. Don’t come near to me.”

He again ignored and when he is just a feet away. His hand goes to the button of your pant. Your eyes go wide and hands reacting fast enough to hold his but he was faster than you. Swatting your hands away, he pulls the zipper up.

“What? Did you think I am going to do something to you? Aha not like this. Or maybe you thought…..” He leans to your ears, “ I will kiss you again.”

He steps back and precisely takes a look of your form. Nodding to himself, he pats your head and your confused expression made a chuckle out of him.

“That’s looking good on you. You are going out with all boys and I cant trust them. Maybe they can be your old friends but without having contacts with them for so long and you don’t know how would they behave later so better be like this.”

“It’s not like for them I need to dress up accordingly.”

“of course not. You can wear anything when either me and Jeno is there with you but not when you will be all alone.”

“Why is it okay with both of you?”

“I can fight with others for you. Jeno will do the same.”

Going over to the dressing table, you pulled out all the make up kit while talking with him and him admiring your every features as if you are his treasured person. Maybe you are.

“Jeno would rather sell me to them rather than fighting for me.’

“You are wrong there baby. Absolutely wrong. He would burn the world for you but never let any harm on you.”

“Anyways I will leave you here. Do your makeup and have fun tonight but not too much. Remember about what I have told you.”

You keep on staring at your reflection on the mirror with shiny edges after he shuts the door behind, leaving your room. His words clouding all over your mind and his actions playing repeatedly making you groan in frustration. All these types of situations are not usual between the relationship between a brother and a sister and whatever is going to happen later, you must face it with your confidence and true feelings. Patting your cheeks to get yourself off these overthinking and resume your makeup. It took almost one hour when you finished your makeup, its not like you were doing any heavy look but the problem was you were continuously getting distracted when the thought of Jaemin playing across your mind. Glancing at the clock, its almost six in the evening and you should probably leave right now to be there on time. Collecting all the necessary stuffs, you made your way downstairs. Adjusting your smart watch, a message popped up that few have arrived on the location and you need to be there soon.

“Are you ready? Let’s go.”

“Hm….wait!...you? Where are you going?”

“To the place you are going.”

“Why?”

Rolling his eyes, he slides his jacket and fishes his phone inside the pocket of his jeans. Frowning you, still staring at him as if why he is tagging along with you to the place. Before exiting the house, he finds you still standing at the same spot and staring back at him, he rolls his eyes before stepping towards you. Your panic arises watching him coming towards you, you tried to think some possible attempts to escape it but before you could do anything, he catches your wrist and drags you towards the door.

“Jeno…What are you doing?”

“Stop being dramatic. I’m just taking you to your friends.”

“I can go on my own. You… you don’t have to…take me there.”

Reaching near the garage, he takes you to his car. The person whose presence, you try to avoid with every possibility and now you will be riding a car with him. Jaemin has given you ride to and from college a lot of times and that’s how some thought that he was your boyfriend and even Jaemin always has that smug expression on hearing those comments. But you never went anywhere alone with Jeno and if your heart could burst today, it should by now because of the events unfolding after the lunch. Jeno is texting on his phone and your eyes following how his clenched jaws moving with veins popping at the side profile, on his neck disappearing behind the collar of the jackets. He caught you staring at him and that smirk made an appearance on his attractive and sharp face. But. Wait, he is really attractive, a lot more handsome than you have thought of him before. Any girl should drool over this man if he ever proposes them. Maybe you too if he was not your brother, well step-brother.

With slow steps as if he is the predator cornering his prey. Why suddenly they are like this today? I should probably stay at my friend’s house tonight. You try to open the door of the car but to your dismay, it got stuck, you shake it aggressively but it didn’t budge.

“It will break like this. It’s locked sweetheart.”

“Oh…”

You have not turned around but could feel his presence just behind you. Your back flushed against his front. His hands resting against the car, caging you in between, lips near your ears, hot breath tickling your lobe, goosebumps spreading all over your skin.

“Why you always ignoring me?”

You remained quiet. Fingers tangling with the strap of the sling bag in nervousness and his strong smell of cologne hitting your nose clouding your every attempt to push him and run away as you are going to be late.

His one hand grabs your jaw to turn your face to meet your eyes. His eyes blinks to your lips before raising up to meet yours which is covered with glittery makeup.

“I asked you something. You should answer it right?”

You nod to his raised eyebrows.

“Words sweetheart.”

His husky voice and him so close to your body is enough to make you weak in your knees.

“I am not ignoring you.”

“Don’t lie. I don’t like when you lie. Its very obvious how you always leave the scene whenever I come near you but still you are okay with Jaemin.”

“Jeno…I…I’m late…I need to go.”

“Dammit. Look, you are trying to avoid me again. You always have these excuses to avoid me. Why? Am I worse than jaemin?”

He turns you around, pushing you against the car, still caging you between his arms. Eyes daringly staring at you, veins more visible on his forehead and around his throat and neck. You got the chance to have a look of this handsome face so closely for the first time and you are already getting attracted to it even when your consciousness is screaming ‘he is your stepbrother.’

“He might be always sweet to you and shows his flirty side to you but mark my words, he is worse than me. You don’t know what he can do if he ever gets a chance to get you alone and fuck you. His mischievous innocent smile hides all his nasty thoughts and his devil side from you.”

“What are you saying jeno?”

“Don’t pretend that you don’t know how you always tease us when roaming around the house like a little slut you are. It’s good that Jaemin has decided your outfit otherwise who knows what you have worn to meet all those shitheads.”

“Excuse me, they are my friends.”

He steps back and pulls you towards him making you bump into his front. The sound from the car, indicating the unlock of your ride made a surprised squeal from you. Pulling the door open, he offers you to enter his car.

“Have a seat princess. We have a little way to go.”

Without wasting any time, you hurriedly go inside it and shut the door to which he chuckles on your little attempt. He strikingly walks towards the other side to enter the driver seat and as soon as he enters, he brushes his hair, looking in the rear mirror. Gulping, you cast a glance to him and well you find it really attractive whenever one of your brothers do this. Afterall both of them are just walking models.

As soon as you both make an eye contact in the mirror, he smirks and you look out of the window to avoid his gaze.

“How much you try, You are stuck with me inside this little space.”

Leaning towards you, supporting his hand on your seat and the other on the steering wheel.

“You have nowhere to go except appreciating my presence.”

“Jeno…what are you doing?”

He pulls the seat belt before you protest to his further attempts to do anything, fixing it properly, he sighs and smirks at you. As he goes back to do the same for him, you release a heavy breath to the thought that nothing happened like Jaemin.

You remained quiet the whole ride and did your best to keep yourself busy on the phone to avoid any conversation with him. But Jeno is not the one to keep it this way as finally he got the chance with you and that’s also all alone in his car. He kept you asking few questions and when you denied to reply him back, everytime he slides his hands up and down your thighs.

“Don’t be a bad girl, princess.”

The ride to your destination was quick as you all were going to meet in the nearest mall to hangout and have fun with catching up all the gossips you are missing out. He didn’t park the car because he has to go to the office to meet his dad after dropping you off at your place.

“Thanks…thanks for the ride…Jeno.”

Your hands reach over to the handle to push the door open but before the impact, he grips your wrist and pinned you down to your seat. Your eyes go wide when he is almost hovering on top of you, his eyes reading all your little changes in the expression.

“I can’t lose to Jaemin here.”

And with that, he crashes his lips onto yours. The afternoon kiss with the other one was a quick and soft but this one is rough but like he has the whole time of the universe for himself and slowly he is sucking your whole soul. You didn’t kiss back but you push him. Taking heavy breathes, you take a look yourself in the mirror but he grips your jaw and turns to face him. His other hand placing your hairs properly and then wipes the smudged lipstick stain from your face and rubbing it on his lips

“Now it’s perfect.”

He gives you his eye smile. Cute.

As soon as he turns around to open his door, you quickly got out of the car before he could speak up anything more.

The whole evening went with having a lot of delicious foods and having fun at karaoke and arcades. Well, you caught up on lots of funny rumors of your old classmates, many dating scandals and other spicy gossips. It was really great to catch up with your old friends. You were distracted from the thought of your brothers most of the time but everytime a scene comes across your mind, suddenly you would become quiet.

“Y/N, are you okay?”

“Of course.”

You all cant understand because it’s not like you are getting kissed by your brothers everyday. Also, by both of them on the same day.

And you just know, you have to keep all these as secrets from the parents because if they find out about it, you don’t know what would happen after and again you don’t want to ruin your mother’s happy life.

When it was already late at night, you texted your mother that you would be home soon and one of your friends might drop you off to your house and she agreed with it. Your father also texted you to be safe on your way. But two people were not happy with you being out for so long. You had numerous calls from your brothers but you just kept it in silent. It’s not like you haven’t received once. You had answered few of their calls and explained about your ride back home but they were stuck with one sentence.

“We will pick you up. Just tell us when we need to pick you up.”

But you dared to ignore their protest and still asked one of friends to drop you off at home.

Everyone waved off their goodbyes and it’s you and Jongho while going towards the parking area.

“it was really nice to see you after so many months.”

“Same here. I didn’t know that nerdy gummy bear is now a great man.”

“Well I am now and I can protect you as well.”

“Thank you.” You both giggled on his words.

“There wont be a need for you to protect her.”

Why? Cant atleast the night end peacefully? You both turned around to the voice and Jongho frown to see two unfamiliar faces glaring back at him.

“Who are you? Y/N, do you know them?”

“She is not likely to be answerable to your every question when we are here you know.”

And that sassy voice made his appearance out from the dark space of the parking lot. Hands folded in front and eyes sending daggers to your friend.

“Hello there mister. Myself Jaemin. A lot more handsome and sexy person than you.”

Before Jongho could protest anything, Jaemin grip your wrist and start dragging you towards the car where you could already see someone sitting in the driver’s space. He has not come alone. That means Jeno is also there. Turning your face, you send a reassuring smile that you are fine and you waved him goodbye and told him to have a safe ride back home. Unlike you.

“Jaemin, leave my hand. I can walk.”

He ignores your every word and proceeds to walk towards the car. He harshly opens the passenger seat door and pushes you inside. Without any complaint, you swiftly go inside and he shuts the door. He goes in the backseat when your focus falls on Jeno’s hand gripping the steering wheel tightly, knuckles turning white and veins popping attractively on his arms, he is not wearing the jacket from previously and shirt sleeves are folded.

“Why didn’t you pick up the calls?”

“I told you before that I could have gone back with Jongho.”

Jaemin interjects.

“so? Haven’t I told you before that I don’t trust your friends?”

“That’s your problem. I trust my friends.”

“You-“

Jeno darkly chuckles. “Jaemin, let it go. She doesn’t know that we know how to tame brats like her.”

“What?”

“Ah sure Jeno.”

That’s how you were bombarded with lot of questions during the ride back home about your whole day.

The following next week, you were doing your best to avoid being near to them. But they have the total opposite thing on their mind. Their motive was to follow you like the lost puppy the whole day. The worst thing was that they would make some worst excuses sometimes and not let you to leave for any kind of parties and meet ups. It was okay to go out for any day-out fun but not night. Surprisingly, your parents were also agreeing with them and appreciating the fact that how they were showing their concern for their only sister.

If only they knew, how they actually treat you.

With the passing of days, you can feel their eyes are more lingering on your body. Their intense pervert gaze to which you glare them back but one either blinks at you or the other smirks at you confidently. You were nothing less as you would also check them out whenever they are unaware of your presence and not to lie, you are getting attracted to them more with every passing time, you are getting more proper close up look of their bare face with raw and groggy voice each morning and sometimes when you come across with each other during midnight.

And then this day when suddenly, your parents have to leave for a vacation business trip for a couple of months and that means. THAT MEANS YOU WILL BE ALONE WITH YOUR BROTHERS THE WHOLE DAY. EVERY DAY. You begged your mother to take you with her but she waved you off telling how childish and stupid you sound like. You almost spilled out the actual reason but regained your composure to keep the secret.

So you made a plan to spend few days at your friends house and maybe you should plan out some more hangouts so you don’t have to face your brothers. And that’s how, you are making your way out of the house to meet your dearest friend but maybe that’s not how smooth your life is meant to be.

“Where do you think you are going?”

Only one more step and you would have been out of the house but not today. Gulping, you clutched the door handle tightly in your fist and turned around to face the owner of the voice. It’s not like the person is anyhow unfamiliar to you or someone you are scared of. Well, yeah the person who you want to avoid rather you should unless you want to be in a big trouble. Turning around on your heel, you kept your gaze on the floor, suddenly finding it the most beautiful and appreciable thing in your life. You could feel the approaching footsteps but not daring to look up because why will you when you are damn aware of the person before you. Your panic state didn’t go unnoticed by the approaching person. Now, you could smell the cologne of the man and the close proximity between you two was making your mind scream loudly inside. Two fingers brushing your cheeks sliding down to your chin and grabbed it, forcing you to look up. Due to the sudden impact, you closed your eyes, still could hear the chuckle left from his lips. Even when your eyes are closed, you could still feel the well built muscular body towering over you. Another hand brushed your hairs and tugged them behind your eyes. Your heart racing and mind screaming but you just wanted to run away from the current situation.

“Open your eyes baby.”

No. Please let me go out. You were mentally begging him to let you go but nothing was coming out of your throat and so you just gulped the lump. Not reacting to his words, he gripped your jaw tightly and you could feel his breath fanning over your lips. You tried to bend backwards but his other hand placed on your lower back pulled you closer towards him.

“Didn’t you hear what I said? Open your eyes. Let me see the pretty eyes of my baby.”

His voice was a lot more dominative than before and you didn’t want to make him mad so you slowly parted your eyelids. Eyes couldn’t focus on his face due to the fact that you were closing them so tightly previously and also this man being so close to you that lights couldn’t make up the image properly for your eyes. Flattering your eyelashes, you were then staring to those attractively seductive eyes as it could hipnotiza you. Anyone could have felt weak for these eyes and him in such situation including you but not when he being your brother. Well, correctly stepbrother. You were damn aware of the treatment that a step brother should have for his little sister but in your case, nothing was near to that fact check. You were literally living with two damn tease who constantly stir up every situation to flirting and teasing.

“Did you ask us before leaving?”

“I- I was just going to tell you.”

“Really? It doesn’t look like that. It was as if you were going somewhere else to avoid us tonight. Is there any reason?”

You were trying to voice out some words but the way his fingers were brushing over your lower lips. Oh gosh! It’s not helping your condition.

“Answer him.”

Okay! Time to leave now. The only thing I have to do is to push the man in front of me and quickly run out of the door before the other one can descend the stairs. Eyes dancing on their forms, mentally you counted to three and you pushed him. He got startled due to your sudden action but was quick to catch your hands.

“Step one more. You will regret it later so much.”

“Someone is being a stubborn today, you know.”

“Where was she going Jaemin?”

You could see him smirking on his brother’s question before replying to him, he winked at you with lips sending a flying kiss to you. The biggest tease in the household. You glared at him and when you looked at the other one, he was already glaring at you darkly with clenched jaw. But you were getting distracted how his biceps were well reflected under the bright lights because of his black sleeveless tee.

“I was asking her that before you made your entry on our private time. Jeno got no jam.”

“Shut up Jaemin. You are literally standing at the entrance in a massive hall and saying private time.”

“But there is no one around.”

“I am here. Well, getting back to her. It’s past curfew time and where is she going even all dolled up.”

Both of them expecting an answer from you, waiting for your reply but you chose to remain quiet. You tried to wiggle your hand out of his grip but he held it tighter and Jeno was satisfied with his brother’s act. You stared at the older one who had already seated himself comfortably on the sofa and staring back at you both, gesturing his brother to pull you towards him.

“I was just going somewhere.”

“Where?” Jeno asked with a lot more husky voice.

“T-to to meet someone.”

“Now?” Jaemin with a frown on his face turned towards you.

“Yeah….”

“Who?”

You looked towards Jeno before thinking twice as it would be safe to tell them or not but you chose death.

“My boyfriend.”

“Since when do you have one?”

“We are just going to meet today to get along with each other so he invited me to his house for a sleepover. He is my old friend.”

“And you thought without telling us, it would be fine for you to just sneak out of the house and have fun.”

“No Jeno look I-“

You didn’t notice when Jaemin went behind and wrapped his arms around you to hold you flushed to him. His nose snuggling into your wavy locks on your shoulder and neck.

Whispering ‘baby’ ‘pretty’ ‘princess’ in your ears, breathe tingling over. But the next thing he whispered made your eyes went wide.

“Tell him you can’t make it today.”

Jeno read your actions precisely and noticing how you pressed your legs together, his brother’s every little action was getting a reaction out from you. Honestly, he was enjoying the view more than he could describe but the moment your eyes went wide, the corner of his lips rose on knowing what was the possible reason behind that. Moreover, he found everything cute.

“Do it. Whatever he is telling you, work it.”

“No no I can’t.” Jaemin’s grip was strong and the way both of them hit the Gym, you were well aware that you couldn’t stand any chance in front of them.

“You can do this but you can’t go out.”

“Please.”

“Call him yourself or I’m going to do it. What do you want?”

Snatching your purse from the hand, he hurriedly rummages into it to find your phone. Found it, unlocking the phone, he went through all your contacts and text messages until he found out your precious friend. How come he knows my password?

Dialing the number, he kept the phone in front of you with speaker on. You could see your reflection with your stepbrother on that tiny screen. Suddenly the screen turned on, and someone spoke from the other side.

“Hello?”

“Hey! Jongho….”

Even when you were talking with your friend, you made a straight eye contact with those daring eyes of jeno in front of you holding your phone. Jaemin was still in his world, inhaling your body scent as if you were a drug that he was missing out all these days. Your voice cracked when you felt him leaving kisses over your exposed shoulder.

“When are you coming Y/N?”

Before you could reply, jeno mouthed you to say what they wanted to hear from you. He raised his eyebrows when you remained quiet.

“Sorry but I don’t think ......I can go today.”

“What happened? Is everything alright? Do I need to come over for help?”

“No no it’s just mild headache. You don’t have to worry much.”

Jeno came closer to you and tracing his fingers through your face before pressing them on your lips. You averted your eyes away.

Jaemin whispered in between biting your earlobe, “eyes on him baby.”

You somehow managed to do so until the third voice interrupted.

“Please take care and let me know if you need something.”

You replied with a low ‘hmm’ before he cut the line and tossing the phone on the sofa.

“Now leave me. Let me go.”

“Now where are you planning to go? Didn’t Jeno said earlier it’s already past curfew time?”

“Both of you have already ruined my night. Now Atleast let me go to my room. So, move!”

Both of them chuckled on your reply and you creased your eyebrows in confusion, wiggling under their hold and gaze. Finding your actions cute, they started laughing.

“Why are you laughing?”

“You said you can’t make it tonight so let us make that excuse valid. Right Jaemin?”

“Of course, Jeno.”

“What do you mean?”

“I can do this all night baby, Make a wish.” Jaemin licked and whispered in your ears, biting the earlobe before retreating his mouth.

Jeno leaned down to match your eye level.

“Let’s keep it a secret before you can unfold what’s coming in your way.”

“no. look. Jeno…Jaemin…I- I…”

“What?”

“baby…just follow us and you will love it for sure.”

You know whatever is going to happen is something that should not been like this but the way your body is already turned on is basically denying your thoughts to stop everything right on the spot. You followed them to their game room, that’s the only common room they share whenever they have game nights with their friends. You haven’t entered this room anytime before and exploring everything new today is really exciting you. Exploring their new self will be lot more exciting to you.

As soon as you and Jaemin entered the room, Jeno shut the door behind and that’s how you know, you have to block every other thoughts which screaming to you to back off but yet here you are challenging their offer. Well not offer but you want to see how far they can go. Are you so irresistible to them?

Jaemin took you to the middle of the room, throwing your purse away and cupping your face and neck with both of his hands and pulls you closer. Eyes scanning every detail of your face, admiring your beauty even when he sees you everyday but not like this when turned on and your body radiating heat on his bare palm. With few blinks of his eyes, he closes the distance between your lips. Well, that soft human is nowhere to be found but a hungry demon feasting on his last meal as the way his teeth sucking your lips. Teeth clashing with each other, hands gripping tightly on your neck leaving marks but you are not protesting against rather you accept the doing and kissing him back. You can feel a different set of handles fondling with your dress back zipper and within few seconds, the zip goes down, the dress still hanging on your body but hands snaking from behind around your waist.

You part your lips from Jaemin to take breath when jeno speak from behind you, face snuggling into your shoulders and collar bone, inhaling your scent.

“Can I?”

You don’t even know what he’s asking with the groan lacing with the question, yet you nod in compliance. Jaemin averts your attention towards him by turning your face in his hands, nose nudging against yours before he kisses you. His lips are soft and warm, and you’re genuinely enjoying  how excellent he is at kissing. You again got lost in him devouring you, hands around his neck as to bring him closer.

You’re not sure how long you’ve been kissing for, only until Jeno tugs on your hair and pulls you out of your trance. You whimper when you’re parted from Jaemin, who smirks at the noise, hands entangled with yours.

“Don’t be a jerk right now, Jaemin” Jeno growls, pulling your back to his front as he moves to your neck. You moan when his tongue licks a juicy stripe up your neck, hands roaming around your body, the heated body coming in contact with the cold air of the room making your whole body shiver under their warm touch. Jeno tugging your dress upwards, leaving your thighs bare and exposed to Jaemin whose eyes following every movement the dress is revealing more inch of your skin from underneath.

Jeno kisses you hungrily like a beast. Jaemin’s kiss was intense but this kiss is everything but soft. His grip on you and kiss, both are rough. He is holding you as if a slight loose in the grip will make you fade away and the same goes for the kiss. He doesn’t bite you rough but little gently, yet making you bleed slightly. Your whine and moans to his actions are like musics to his ears.

“Ah, you’re so fucking perfect,” Jeno hisses, fingers inching closer to your core. “Make you whimper under me all night and can listen to your moans all night.”

“I know we have all night and I can see her like this for the rest,” you hear Jaemin with his sassy voice. “But I want to have my donut with the jam in the middle.”

You were so distracted with Jeno attached to your neck and one hand playing with your clothed breasts that you didn’t notice his other hand slides your panty enough to get a proper access to your core and dips a finger inside which let out a loud moan from inside your throat. Both of them smirk in satisfaction.

Before he can slides a second finger in, Jaemin bent down to lace his mouth with your other left out breast. He pulls the dress down to free it from the cover and quickly takes the nipple between his teeth, sucking and pulling it softly but enough to make you whimper to the effect. You know you should not enjoy this whole thing but yet here you are feeling yourself floating in cloud 9.

“She feels good, her soft skin, her seductive scent is driving me crazy” Jeno speak in a low tone still audible to the whole room, lips trailing kisses all over your neck, shoulders and collarbone, biting in between, ripping soft screams and sobs out of you. “What do you think we should do, Jaemin ?”

“Everything,” he chuckles, tongue flicking over your nipple and other nipple being rolled around between the fingers of Jeno, tugging it slightly. “I want to have her in every way I have dreamed and thought every second whenever she walks around the house in tees without any bra.”

You fail to register his words as Jeno increase his pace inside you, fingers pumping in and out of your pussy along with the tortures going on to your nipples.

“Get her on the bed,” Jeno says. “I want her to see breaking down under me and let’s see how she will escape me like other days.”

Jaemin pulls you away from Jeno just to push you against the bed. You whine on losing contact in your heated mound. Your messed up body hits the well knitted soft bedsheet, surrounded by all the neon lights to create a gaming environment but today’s game is whole lot different from other days. It’s the game you have wanted to play with them. Always.

You feel a tap on your cheek and you glance up to see Jaemin sitting beside you, smiling with eyes filled with lust. His fingers brush your lips, “no matter how long I kiss you, I won’t get enough of you.”

You are distracted with the angel sitting beside you whose deeds are totally of a devil, your eyes following how he pecks your nose before attaching his mouth to your nipples and to the effect, you close your eyes tightly, feeling the moment intently.

You feel someone slide your panty down your legs but still keeping your heels on and dress fondled over your stomach. You feel harsh slap against your pussy and then when you look down to see Jeno eyeing your core hungrily and his look is enough to make you wet more, he eyes your arousal leaking out of you, groaning with the scene. Your attempt to close your legs got stuck when he holds tightly the thighs apart and darkly looks at you.

“Be a good girl for me, princess.”

You nod and grips the bedsheet and other hand in Jaemin’s hair , tugging them extracting groans of pain but him not stopping you from doing it.

“Shit!” Jeno curses when he licks a long stripe of your arousal and your back arches, pushing the chest to Jaemin’s mouth. He has that smug look on his face to have you like this and knows well how his brother is making you feel good. “you taste so heavenly, baby.”

Before you can register the words, Jeno again attaches his mouth to your heat and sucks it harshly, fingers digging into your skin leaving marks making it too obvious for others to know how you got those bruises. The abuse on your tits and mound is taking to your climax slowly. You can feel the coil tightening inside your stomach and Jaemin could feel it with your body movements

“My baby, you are mine,” Jaemin praising you continuously but the way he is constantly biting uour nipples and leaving marks all over the chest and throat is really contrasting his sweet voice. “Doing so good for us.”

‘How can that mouth do two opposite things together.”

You see white when Jeno wraps his mouth around your clit, sucking harshly at the nub. You hit the climax immediately as soon as he presses his palm above the stomach and Jaemin pulls your both the nipples. Jeno licks every last drop of your cum but didn’t intend to end the abuse.

“Stop it…jeno…”

Even when you cum, he didn’t stop but keep on licking the clit, overstimulating you and to which your back arches and the view is heavenly for Jaemin.

“Fuck, you’re so hot.”Jaemin hisses, admiring your chest going up and down with heavy breathings and pained expression due to overstimulation. While keeping his eyes on you, he slowly unbuckles his belt, pushing the pants and boxers down to expose his hard and thick cock. He smiles at your glazed eyes, pumping himself a few times and you know that this smile is hiding all the possible monstrous activities.

Jeno pushes two of his fingers and you nearly scream out his name with the feeling of his tongue still fucking you and in addition of his two fingers scissoring inside you.

Jaemin moves down his hand to your clit and starts to rub the bud. This is too much for you. His actions are going parallel with one hand rubbing the clit and other one rubbing the nipple in the same pace. The second orgasm with two of them abusing you came too fast and your whole body is covered with sweats and exhaustion but this is the only beginning.

Jaemin pushes Jeno aside while the latter laughed to see his brother’s impatience and well he would have been the same if it was otherwise.

“I want to taste you too but let me first fuck you and feel this tiny hole around my cock.”

“Are you going to wear a condom?” You ask in a weak tone.

Jaemin laughs. “We don’t need one, baby.”

“What?”

You both moan together when he pushes himself inside, stretching your cunt with his cock. You cry out at the brief feeling of pain before you feel Jeno placing his lips over yours. Jaemin’s deep voice is making you clench around his cock. Feeling it, he grabs your ass tightly, leaving red fingerprints.

“Doing so well for us, princess,” he murmurs against your mouth. “Such a pretty angel for me.”

“Not only yours but….but mine too.”

“Did I complain when you called her your baby so just shut up and fuck her.”

Pain shifts into pleasure as Jaemin presses his palm above your clit, fingers circling around the nub. You can feel his cock is driving up into your stomach and hitting it with the force of his thrusts. He continues to maintain his pace till he hits the desired spot to make you scream out his name.

“JAEMIN!”

“That’s it,” he chuckles, slapping your pussy and cock hitting into that spot over and over.

You feel Jeno’s breath ghosting over your ear. Jeno licking your ears and groaning while playing with your nipples letting the familiar neediness building inside you all over again and the coil might explode before reaching the climax. The licking sound into your ears and the wet sounds coming from the down where Jaemin hitting your g-spot is enough to make you feel like the most special and enchanted person to them. Well it’s not only your thought but you are like a dreamy angel to them while all spread out like this on the bed, everything exposed and on display only for them to devour on it.

You approach your third orgasm of the day when Jaemin hits the spot with a deep thrust , your body is overwhelmed as both of them giving all of their attention to you as you are like a goddess spread in front of them to whom they got access after so many attempts.Jaemin groans loudly when you clench around him, he soon reached his high and bends down to peck your lips still buried inside you. You nearly got pass out by the intensity of your orgasm and the feeling of him emptying his seeds inside of you. You’ve never had sex before with someone and your stepbrothers being your first is something so different to imagine. Jaemin feeling you up and without any protection is clouding your mind with different feelings but got interrupted by him.

“Shit,” Jaemin curses before smiling up at you and looking towards his brother . “Her pussy is so fucking good. I want to have her again.”

Your blissed out expression while whimpering his name and shaking uncontrollably under him when he was fucking you is still replaying in his mind. Your bouncing tits when he was pushing inside you with his faster pace and the pleasure filled face when you approached your high when he hit your sweet spot was enough for him.It is driving him crazy and not letting you go away from him and wanting to fuck you to the brim until you pass out like this.

“Let me have my turn now, Jaemin,” Jeno with annoyance in his voice reminds his brother, but he’s immediately shoved away by Jaemin.

“No please let me have one more round.”

“You had your fun. It’s my turn now. Move before I just lock you out of the room.”

“Fine,” Jaemin rolls his eyes before pulling himself out and getting off the bed to change the position with Jeno and you find Jeno again between your legs.

“I’ll take her ass later and you can’t deny it then.”

“Fine.”

“W-What?” You stammer. Later? What do they mean?

“Don’t worry, baby,” Jeno assures you. “It’ll feel good, you just have to trust us. You can be a good girl for us tonight right?”

“How can I trust?”

“Why?”

“I don’t know but my brothers fucking me already breaking the trust of us being siblings-“

“Shut up. We are not siblings. Only me and Jaemin are legal brothers and you are our step sister not our own blood. But ours. You are ours.”

“Yes Jeno is right. No one can take you away from us. Even if people point out us being step siblings, I will fucking cut their hands down.”

Jeno smirks, “maybe burn them alive.”

They leave you no room to protest as Jeno turns you around, face hitting the pillow and his strong grip pulling your ass up, aligning with the tip of his cock. When he freed himself from the boxers, you could feel the pain spread all over your body as you have never seen such big cock, it’s thicker than Jaemin’s and you don’t think it can fit inside you, letting aside in your ass where you never had slid a single finger and rest alone this cock.

“I-I don’t think I’m r-ready for this-“

“You are,” Jeno soothes. “Don’t worry.”

“No no please. I’m already tired and this is…I don’t think I can…stop it Jeno.”

You barely get a chance to stop him as Jaemin pinned your hand to your back which were trying to reach jeno to make him stop. Jaemin kisses your head to soothe you and ease the tensed body.

“Relax. Relax your muscles. You are perfectly made for us and by now we know what your body can take and upto how much.”

“Jaemin, first make her feel at ease or it will hurt her in a worst way.”

Jaemin hums softly in your ear. “You’re going to feel so good, my baby.”

You nod with eyes tight closed and Jaemin smiles while parting your head. Jeno spread and covered the hole with lube before sliding himself into you. As soon as Jeno entered to your back, you could feel a tear slide down your face when Jaemin wipes it off with a finger.

“You’re so fucking tight,”Jeno groans and his groggy voice letting out a moan from you. “Her ass is clenching around me and also sucking me in slowly..”

Your moans getting lost into the pillow and muffled noises could be heard when he is pounding inside you. Jaemin let go off tour hands when he feels you would no longer protest and the hands fell on both of your sides weakly. Jeno noticed it and a proud smile with a self satisfaction blooms inside him. They have totally wreck you under them inside their closed room. Your exhaustion visible on your face and seeing that Jeno increase his pace,

“Hang on for a little more, baby. I promise it’ll feel good.”

You gasp when Jeno’s cock hitting every inch of the hole and making your body squirm under him boosting his self esteem at your reactions. He gathers some of Jaemin’s cum leaking out of your entrance and rubs your clit.

“Such a pretty princess. You’re gonna feel good, baby, the way am loving to see tears straining and messing up with your make up ” he soothes you again and the way his pace is uneven you know he is near to his climax.

The stretch is so painful and tears continuously falling down your face at the feeling.

“So good, you’re doing so good.” Jeno praises.

Jaemin who’s presence was absent for a while spoke up.

“If I was not there to catch you while sneaking out of the house then you would have miss all these fun.”

Jeno’s hand sliding up and down your bare back to soothe your tensed muscles and also messaging the ass. With few thrusts, you both come undone.

Still buried deep inside, he leans down to leave feathery kisses on all over your back and praising in between. You feel someone removing your hairs from the face while patting your cheeks gently. You hum in response.

“Are you with us Y/N?”

“No more…please…I can’t.”

Jeno pulls himself out and Jaemin make you sit up and quickly changing your place from the bed on his lap. They rip away all the loosely hanging clothing from your body along with your heels.

“This one is last baby.”

“N-No,” you protest, body feeling completely exhausted. “I can’t. Please, I can’t.”

Jeno sits in front of you, cupping your face and pecking your forehead, nose and lips, “I told you to trust us. You will feel good and you are still being a good girl for us. It’ll be quick.”

While Jeno was distracting you, Jaemin’s lubed finger enters your hole to prepare and it’s still tight after being stretched out from Jeno. With a satisfied stretch, he signals Jeno to hold you down while he enters you and as soon as he slides himself inside, you scream out but Jeno shushes you with the kiss. This kiss is a gentle kiss unlike before and it is really distracting you from the pain which is slowly shifting into pleasure. Jaemin’s hand finds your pussy and dips a finger inside to collect your leaking cum. With few thrust when he has milked his fingers enough, he brings them to his lips to taste them and groans in pleasure.

“You were right Jeno. She is delicious.”

Not letting you to keep up with their conversation when Jeno slides himself to your entrance and you nearly sob due to them both filling you up at the same time. You have felt so full even when you have eaten food more than you can digest. This foreign feeling is not much painful but rather exciting you to know how does it feel when they start moving.

Them nodding to each other, starts moving. A burning sensation spread all over your body and slowly slowly shifting to tingling pleasures. Toes curling, fingers digging into the skin. Jaemin biting down your shoulders and Jeno nearly choking you with hands around your throat gently but not to make you uncomfortable.

They increase their pace with praises flowing like a waterfall from their lips to make you float at the top of this world. Your mouth hangs open and Jeno takes this chance to slide his thumb inside and press on your tongue. You invitingly suck his digit.

“Shit I can feel you, jeno.”

“Me too.” He reads your body and facial expressions before calling out to Jaemin, “I don’t think she will last enough. Do it fast.”

With some few more thrust, you come undone and rest yourself against the front of Jeno and Jaemin sliding his hands against your back. You whine due to overstimulation but soon they come and ride out their high.

Pulling out from you, you are totally exhausted and anytime, you would pass out. But still trying your best not to fall in slumber. Jaemin makes some space to lay you down properly in the middle of the bed and you hug his torso before he covers both of you with the blanket Jeno brings over to him.

Jaemin brushes away the hair from your face, gently turning your body so that all your tensed and constricted muscles feel at ease.

“My pretty baby,” he whispers and you smile in response. “Get some sleep. We will clean you and take care of everything.”

“What are we now?” You ask with hooded eyes and murmuring sound.

Jeno chuckles at you, finding your every action cute when you are sleepy. “Isn’t it obvious. You are ours now. You belong to us. only us. You can’t ignore us now.” He slides himself inside the blanket to your other side mimicking his brother’s pose. Both of their attention on the sleepy figure between them, admiring how you still manage to look the prettiest even in such a state of exhaustion.

“Keep it a secret from our parents.”

“We will see about that.”

“No but-“

“Shh,” Jaemin coos. “Get some rest.”

Will it be a secret forever? Can they really keep it a secret? What if everyone comes to know about you?

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Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @vvshere @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @eriny123 @jaehunnyy @jaeminnanaaa17 @stolasisyourparent @bockhyun @b-a-nshee-blog @kundann

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[blue-babygirl]

Pizzas and Stargazing

Pairing: Reader x Aaron Hotchner + Jack Attack

Type: Fluff

Description: After a three-day mandatory leave and a trip home to your family, you finally get to have a date night with your man.

Word count: 2.4K

Note: just a very well-deserved mention to my beloved Romie @criminalskies . You are the most amazing person ever and thank you for helping me review these fics. <3

“Y/n. My office. Now please.”

You look up from your computer to Aaron outside his office as the rest of the team looks at you. You give him a quick nod and save the documents you were working on as the team questions why you are being called to the ‘principal’s office’.

“I don’t know.” You shrug at them, truly clueless as to why you were called in. As you make your way to his office, you notice that his blinds are drawn. You give a quick knock before going in. “Everything okay?”

“Lock the door please.” Aaron says as he stands by his desk. You do as you are told and as you turn around to look at him, you are surprised to see him waiting with his arms open with an invitation for a hug.

You don’t let the surprise stop you from practically barreling yourself into his arms for the hug. You snuggle your face into his chest and give him a tight squeeze.

“Are you okay?” You peer up at him, letting your chin rest on his chest as he plays with your hair.

“Mhm. You washed your hair today.” Aaron kisses your forehead as he says this. “How was family time?”

“I did wash my hair today.” You give him an amused smile. “And you know exactly how family time was, I was updating you over call every few hours.”

“Your hair is always softer a few hours after you wash it.” Aaron nuzzles his face into your hair, as if to emphasize his words.

You blush and press your face into his chest as you feel him kiss your neck, making him chuckle. The two of you stand there in each other’s embrace for a few more minutes, just basking in the other’s presence after the three-day mandatory leave.

Suddenly Aaron pulls back slightly, removing his face from your shoulder and placing his head on top of yours.

“Are you free tonight?” He looks down at you, pecking your forehead as he waits for your response.

“Baby, when I’m ever not free for you?” You grin at him as he scoffs jokingly.

“Let me think…when you have girl’s night? When you are helping Derek with the restoration? When you are out with, like, any of the girls? When you-”

“Okay!” You kiss him to cut him off. “I was just trying to be cheesy, jeez!”

Aaron grins at you before pulling you into another kiss. You giggle and peck his lips before pulling away, now curious as to why he asked.

“So? Why do you ask Agent Hotchner?” You mimic a professional tone as if you were working. Which to be honest, you are supposed to be doing right now, not hug your boyfriend in his office, practically cuddling.

“Well, Agent L/n,” Aaron exaggerates in the same professional tone, playing along, “if you must know, I was hoping to take my girlfriend out tonight and needed to know if she was free.”

You grin at him as he smiles at you before suddenly, your bubble is broken by the ringing of his phone. Both of you sigh as you pull away to let Aaron get his phone and answer the call. Aaron holds you to his side as he talks to who appears to be ‘Cherlyn’. You see him frown as he agrees to…something...and move your hand to smooth out his frown lines, making him smile at you.

“What is it?” You ask as soon as he puts down his phone, making him sigh.

“We might have to reschedule going out. That was Manny’s mom. Jack was supposed to have a sleepover at his place tonight, but they are going to have to reschedule.” Aaron sighs as he hugs you close.

“So? We can just take Jack with us.” You shrug as you snuggle into him.

You look up when you feel him stop playing with your hair you, which you just now noticed that he was even doing. He is looking down at you surprised, making you raise your brows at him before grabbing his hand and making his hand comb through your hair.

“You sure you want to take Jack along?” Aaron questions as he takes the queue and starts playing with your hair again.

“Of course! Why wouldn’t I be?” You furrow your brows in confusion at his question.

“I…I don’t really know. I just wanted to make sure that you wanted to take Jack with us.”

You kiss him, holding him close by the lapels his suit jacket, before pulling away to reassure him that you definitely wanted to take Jack with you. Just as he pulled you in for another sweet kiss, a knock echoed through the room, followed by JJ’s voice, making you pull away with a huff.

“Later baby.” Aaron kisses your cheek as you get sorted and make sure you look professional enough to go back out.

You open the door to a grinning JJ making you shake your head as you go back to your desk. Derek and Emily try to interrogate you about why Hotch had called you into his office and if it was for work or for other stuff. You wave them off, saying that it was work and just a check-in to see how my mandatory leave was. They continue pestering you a bit more before stopping when Dave tells them off.

Later, just as you come back from Garcia’s office after getting her help with something in the file you are working on, you see a text from Aaron on your personal phone.

Be ready by 7. Dress super comfy.

You smile as you text him back. Bring me a hoodie. You look at his office window to see him smiling at his phone before shaking his head. You grin, giddy about whatever Aaron has planned, as you get back to work with more vigor to get done as soon as possible so you can get on with your date.

You clean up and get ready to leave as soon as you are done, not planning on staying back to see the faces of the team when Hotch leaves early. You know that their reactions will be hilarious but making cookies for your boys and their happiness will be worth it in comparison.

You make your way to Hotch’s office to give in your files, making Derek and Emily question you about your plans since you are already done with work. You ignore them, giggling as you get into Hotch’s office, giving him the files before asking if you could leave.

“On one condition.” Aaron says in a stern voice, continuing when you raise your eyebrows in question. “Give me a kiss and you can go.”

You laugh out loud at that before moving around his desk to give him a kiss. Just as you go to pull away, Aaron pulls you in again, deepening the kiss this time before letting you go.

“See you at seven Agent Hotchner.” You grin as you blow him a kiss before leaving his office.

Derek and Emily tease you a bit as you get your things, singing the kissing song making you chuckle. You wish them a goodbye before making your way to the elevators. The last thing you hear as the glass doors close behind you is Reid questioning someone about what song Derek and Emily were singing making you laugh out loud.

As you get home, you are buzzing with excitement and anticipation as you put on some music before going into the kitchen to start the cookies. You use the cookie dough you bought on your last grocery run, making some nutella filled cookies and topping some with m&ms. You pop them in the oven, setting a timer according to the instructions on the cookie dough container.

You check the time before making your way to the shower. A quick shower and a change of clothes later, you get the cookies out of the oven, leaving them out to cool down while you lay on the couch, almost falling asleep, as you wait for Aaron to get here.

A phone call from Aaron that he is downstairs later, you pack up the cookies and make your way down after locking up your apartment. You grin and literally run when you see Aaron’s car parked near the entrance.

You open the back door, jumping in as you greet the boys in the front, grinning at the happy smile and excited shout you get at the mention of cookies.

“So? What’s the plan?” You ask, leaning ahead and across the middle console at the front.

“Can I tell her daddy?” Jack asks, practically jumping in his seat as you both turn to Aaron.

“Go ahead buddy.” Aaron chuckles. You peck his cheek before turning your attention to the little Hotchner.

“We are gonna get pizza! And we’re gonna go to a waterfall and stargaze! We are gonna go to the wildlife park I went to on Sunday from school!” Jack tells you excitedly and you go along with the same level of genuine excitement.

The rest of the car ride is spent with you chatting with the boys about their time together while you were away, as if you didn’t already know about most of it, and playing car games with them as you get the pizza and some drinks before getting to your destination. Aaron drives the car to a spot on the cliff, right above the waterfall, before putting the car in park.

“Alright guys,” Aaron turns in his seat to better face you and Jack, “we are going to collapse the seats in the back and open the trunk door so that it’s one big open space for us to eat. Jack, hold onto the drinks and pizza. You have to make sure not to drop the food or drinks. Okay?”

“Aye, aye captain!” Jack gives Aaron a mock salute as he takes the food and drinks, making the two of you chuckle.

“And y/n, you are going to have to get out of the car and help me collapse the seat. But first, put on the hoodie.” Aaron hands you a maroon hoodie.

“Aye, aye captain!” You mimic Jack and give Aaron a mock salute as you take the hoodie, making Jack break into a fit of giggles.

You quickly put on the hoodie before joining Aaron outside and helping him collapse the seats, throwing around the pillows and blankets to make it comfier. You help Jack move to the back while Aaron gets settled in.

The next hour is spent in a blissful state of laughter, good food and a game of Jenga. You take a moment to just absorb the happiness surrounding you, just glad to have this, have the Hotchner boys in your life and so close to your heart.

That’s when you realize, you really do love them. You realize that you want to spend the rest of your life like this with this little family. But it also scares you because this is the first time you have genuinely felt this much love for someone, let alone two people. Of course, you love your biological family, but not nearly as much as you love your family at the BAU. But even that doesn’t compete to the love you are feeling right now for your boys.

I wish I could just stay in this moment for forever. You grin up at Aaron as he kisses your cheek with a smile, pulling you and Jack in for a quick hug.

“We should go look at the stars now.” You mumble into the hug before pulling away to look out at the sky.

“Wowww…” Jack gets out of the car as he looks at the sky with you.

Being in a forest-covered area has its perks. One of them is that there is practically zero light pollution so you can see the millions of stars in the sky above you.

You see Aaron get out of the car and laying down a blanket and a few pillows before sitting down and calling you and Jack over to lay down with him. You lay down with Jack in between you and Aaron as you look at the sky, completely mesmerized by the view.

When you turn your head to look at Aaron, you see him staring at you with a soft smile, making you blush slightly. You quickly peck his lips over Jacks head, mumbling about how he should be looking up at the stars.

“But you are my brightest star. There’s no other star I would rather look at.” Aaron smiles at you and you can see the genuineness in his eyes.

You give him a smile before pulling him in for a sweet, passionate kiss, wanting him to know just how much you love him because you literally can’t put your love into words. You just love him so much.

Aaron kisses you back with just as much vigor before you pull away to get a breath of air. Both of you breath a little heavy as you smile at each other. You look down at Jack to see him blissfully asleep.

“We should get him back home.” You play with Jack’s hair softly as Aaron agrees. “I’ll get him to the car. Should I lay him in the back seat?”

“If you can wait a few minutes, let me just get the seats back up, I don’t want him without a seatbelt.” Aaron says as he gets up. You give him a quick nod as you continue playing with Jack’s hair.

Fifteen minutes later, you are all set in the car and on your way back to your apartment. You bask in the comfortable silence beside Aaron, playing with the fingers of his free hand in your lap.

You give Jack a quick kiss on the forehead and an ‘I love you’ as you get out of the car at your apartment building before closing the door and turning to Aaron and almost falling into his open arms for a hug. You kiss him goodbye and go into your apartment building with a last ‘I love you’.

As soon as you get into your apartment, you move to your living room balcony to wave Aaron goodbye, receiving a flying kiss before he leaves. You move to your bedroom, falling back on your bed with a sigh and wishing you were in another bed instead, next to Aaron.

Your last thought before you succumb to sleep? I hope I get to marry him.

[ily-fictional-women]

Rumors

Summary: A Russian. A cold-blooded killer. An assassin. Or at least that’s what they say about the new recruit in SHIELD. And the worst part is, Y/n will have to work with her without knowing if these rumors are true.

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader + platonic!Maria Hill x fem!reader

Warnings: None that I know of but if I should add anything let me know.

Word count: 3526

a/n: Y/n/l is for your last name since y'all voted for that one the most. Also this was supposed to a be a quick one shot but I kind of got carried away. (Reblogs are welcome and critiques/advice are heavily encouraged, but please no translating.)

Y/n lugs her duffle bag over her shoulder before jumping off the helicopter and feeling the adrenaline from her mission finally subside. Already going on autopilot to her bunk, she’s suddenly stopped. Y/n rubs her eyes, “Maria? What do you want? I’m trying to go to my bunk right now.” Maria holds out a file to Y/n, “Fury wants to talk mission prep with you.”

Taking the file reluctantly Y/n gives her a tight-lipped smile, “Thanks Maria.” As Y/n walked off towards Fury’s office she could hear the other woman holler, “And for the last time L/n, It's Hill. Agent Hill.” Y/n laughs out loud, “And last I checked Hill we’ve been friends way before SHIELD.”

Maria slowly follows Y/n with a grin, “Then as your friend, I should tell you that apparently you’re working with the new rookie everyone’s been talking about.” Y/n immediately stops mid-step, turning to face her friend. “Oh you’ve got to be kidding me,” Y/n groans. “I already don’t like working in teams, but a rookie who’s an emotionless assassin is crossing the line.”

Maria lets out a soft laugh at Y/n’s dramatics. “Just go talk to Fury, Y/n.” Y/n gives her a sarcastic shocked look, “Whoa whoa whoa now. I thought we were on a last-name basis, Agent Hill.”

“Stop stalling and just go Y/n/l.”

Y/n lets out a deep sigh, “Fine”

//

Finally making it to Fury's office Y/n knocks on the open door. “ Agent Y/n/l, good of you to finally join us.” Us? Y/n thinks to herself. Peering her head through the doorway she sees a woman with fiery red hair turn her head to look at her. “Agent Y/n/l stop standing around and sit your ass down.”

Sitting down, Fury clears his throat, “Before we talk about mission work we’ll talk about the elephant in the room. Agent Y/n/l, this is Agent Romanoff, you’ll be working with her on this mission. Now Y/n/l I’m sure you’ve heard plenty about Miss Romanoff, and I honestly don’t care. You two need to work that out yourselves.”

“But I don’t-” Fury cuts Y/n off. “Y/n/l, you’re doing this mission. You gotta learn to work with people.” Out of the corner of Y/n’s eye, she could see the redhead tense up slightly, grip tightening around the arms of her chair.

“Moving on, if you review your mission files you’ll see that your mission is taking place in an underground Hydra laboratory in the White River National Forest. Your goal is to take samples of a new super soldier serum Hydra is attempting to make. Then destroy the lab.”

“And what do we do with the rest of the samples and the laboratory?” This was the first time Y/n heard Romanoff’s voice, she’d heard rumors that Romanoff is Russian but the American accent caught her off guard. “You both will be given explosives with a personal detonator. The faster you get out of there the better. Are we clear on everything?”

Y/n closes her mission file getting up from her seat, “Crystal, sir.”

//

Hearing a quick knock, Y/n opens the door to her room with a yawn, “What do you want, I have a mission tomorrow can’t-” squinting her eyes she realizes it’s Maria. “I was going to ask how the meeting went, as your friend. But I feel like this is a bad time.”

With a huff and another yawn, Y/n pulls Maria into her room before flopping onto her bed. “She’s weird, Maria.” Maria sits next to her on the bed with an amused smile, “And how exactly is she weird?” Y/n throws up her arms dramatically, “She was just so quiet! It was off-putting.”

“That’s not really fair Y/n.” She sits up, “How is that not fair Maria?” Y/n could see a huge grin grow on Maria’s face and already knew what she was going to say. “Rember boot camp? Before SHIELD?” With a dramatic whine, Y/n quickly flopped back down on her back, “I knew it! I knew you were gonna bring this up.”

“It’s a valid thing to bring up, Y/n!” Maria tries to shake her arm to get her attention which results in a quick scowl. “Don’t look at me like that, you know I’m right. You didn’t talk a lot or have a lot of friends then. Now you have me and I can’t get you to shut up.”

“Ha ha Maria. But how is that supposed to help me?” Maria lets out a stressed sigh. “Do I really need to spell it out for you?” Y/n shrugs, “Yeah, please. I’m tired, and I have to wake up early tomorrow.”

“Just try not to treat her like everyone else does. Be nice to her.” Rubbing her face into her pillow, she closes her eyes and lets out a soft, “Okay.”

//

The loud rumble of the helicopter was muted by the headsets Y/n, Romanoff, and the pilot wore. Looking down at the view through her window Y/n could see small flakes start to quickly pile up on the trees below her. “Hey, are you sure it’s safe to fly in these conditions? It’s starting to snow pretty hard.”

The pilot presses on her own headset, “Shouldn’t become a problem as long as there’s no delays, Y/n/l.” With a quick sigh, Y/n presses on her comms headset again, “Copy that Agent May.” It takes another irritatingly quiet silence to land a safe distance from the Hydra base.

After everyone takes off their headsets one by one, Agent May pulls out a tablet with an overview of the base. Turning to face the two she gestures to the defenses of the base. “About half a mile from here is the south entrance, which is closest to the ramp leading to the lab you need to go to. The lab is the most heavily guarded part of the base, so be prepared for that.”

The two quickly nod, slinging the supplies in their duffle bags over their shoulders and trudging through the snow as the helicopter started to lift up into the sky again. Making their way to the entrance, two soldiers guarding the front immediately started firing at the two agents.

Reaching for her sidearm, Y/n manages to shoot one in the shoulder while matching Romanoff’s sprinting pace. On the other hand, Romanoff manages to hit the other guard with a blast from one of her wrist tasers, then sliding on one leg sweeping the guard off his feet. Examining one of the guards' bodies, Y/n pulls off their ID card.

Moving slower and quieter, the two make their way to the ramp leading to the lab– the entrance only being a large cement wall and a steel door with, as predicted, an ID scanner beside it. Y/n begins sliding the ID card but pauses, looking over to Romanoff. “Do you have anything besides those taser things?”

Romanoff pulls out her own sidearm and holsters it, "I’ll be fine Agent Y/n/l.” Sliding the card the rest of the way, the two agents are met with seven guards on the other side of the door. Three on each wall of the narrow hallway and one last extra burly soldier in front of the last door that leads to the laboratory.

One of the soldiers smirks, inching closer to the two and slowly raising his rifle. “Now who let you pretty ladies wander down here?” Immediately Romanoff taps something on her wrist, sending the man into a greater electric shock than the last. Romanoff looks down at him, “We let ourselves in.”

“We?” Y/n asks with a smile, following her lead shooting at the guards.

“That’s what I said,” Romanoff replies plainly as she picks up the rifle the soldier dropped, shooting at the other guards.

Now the only one left is the burly guard who started charging for Y/n. Trying to shoot at him, Y/n’s gun only makes a clicking noise. “I’m ou-'' Before Y/n can even finish her sentence Romanoff taps her wrist again, shooting the man which causes him to immediately fall to his knees and land flat on his face.

Finally taking a moment to breathe, Y/n feels a sharp pain in her shoulder, touching the most painful part and feeling blood. Romanoff looks at her with somewhat of a false calm look, “You okay to keep going?” Y/n nods painfully, “Yeah, yeah. The padding took most of the hit. Just a flesh wound.”

Giving Y/n a hesitant look for a moment she moves forward toward the lab, Y/n following suit. Opening the lab door the two are met with a mess of a lab and an obviously panicking scientist. She immediately breaks a glass beaker, lunging at Romanoff. “Y/n grab the vials!” is the last thing Y/n hears before Romanoff starts wrestling the other woman on the ground.

Searching the tables of the lab, there’s no visible sign of the Hydra super soldier serum. “Agent Romanoff, there’s nothing here.” Romanoff manages to straddle the scientist, slowly inching the broken beaker towards her. “Well then keep looking!”

“I will not have my work seized by some spy scum!” The scientist manages to flip Romanoff over, inching the broken glass closer to her chest. “Romanoff! Catch!” Y/n slides a large sharp piece of glass towards the other woman before getting back to looking for the serum.

With the new shard of glass, Romanoff manages to toss the other woman to the side, stabbing her. But in the process of doing so getting stabbed herself.

“Romanoff! I found some vials! We need to plant the bombs and go-” her voice goes quiet as she notices the wound- “right now. Shit.” Romanoff pulls the glass out of her side, putting pressure on her wound. She grits, “Plant the bombs first, worry about me after, Y/n/l.”

For a second she hesitates wanting to help her, but ultimately she listens to Romanoff’s instincts. Shoving the samples in her pocket, Y/n takes off her duffle bag and begins unloading the explosives. Four explosives, one for each corner of the lab– ensuring that everything is destroyed.

Lugging her bag over her shoulder, Y/n pulls Romanoff off the ground before swinging the agent’s arm over her uninjured shoulder. Hobbling out of the lab, Romanoff groans in pain, “Y’know you don’t need to do this. I can walk fine on my own.”

Y/n manages to let out a pained laugh, “Save your energy and stop complaining, Romanoff.”

Managing to get out of the laboratory is one thing, waiting for extraction will be another thing. Sliding against the cement wall, both Y/n and Romanoff sit down. Looking out in the distance Y/n noticed the snow, there was so much more of it compared to when they first landed.

Pulling out her phone, she called her last resort, Fury.

“Come on, pick up, pick up.”

“Miss Y/n/l, I was just about to call you.”

“Don’t Miss Y/n/l me Fury, where’s extraction?”

“As I was saying Agent Y/n/l, I was about to message you stating that because of an incoming blizzard, it isn’t safe to bring extraction to you. But there’s a SHIELD-owned cabin that Hydra doesn’t know about 2 miles West of your drop-off point. I suggest you start heading there.”

Not having the composure to reply to anything Fury said Y/n just hangs up on him. “Romanoff. Come on, we gotta start walking. Fury said there’s a place we can stay for a bit.” Y/n was met with no reply. Slapping the redhead’s cheek lightly a few times wakes her up. “Good, I can’t have you falling asleep on me Romanoff. Let’s go!”

“The bombs Y/n/l,” Romanoff nearly whispers. “What?” Y/n asks more focused on making it to the cabin. “The bombs,” Romanoff says louder one more time. “Shit, you’re right.” Y/n immediately comes to a stop, nearly causing Romanoff to trip. But with the bomb being set off they needed to move fast.

//

“In SHIELD training there’s similar exercises to walking long distances with partners. What they don’t account for is the snow, injuries, and trees! So many damn trees. I don’t know why I’m rambling, you've probably gone through SHIELD academy.”

Romanoff hisses in pain, “I haven’t, and you can stop complaining about the trees-we’re here.” The outside of the cabin looks practically abandoned, with the paint peeling and wood rotting. When touching the rusted handle though, an automated voice appeared. “Access granted. Welcome Y/n Y/n/l.”

Unlike the outside of the cabin, the inside looked nice. It wasn’t luxurious looking but it worked. And most importantly, there was a fireplace. Easing Romanoff onto a nearby chair gave Y/n a moment to look through the drawers of the cabin. “Matches! Finally.”

Flicking a lit match into the pre-placed pile of wood in the fireplace, Y/n starts rummaging through her duffle bag, grabbing a first aid kit and kneeling in front of the other woman. “Okay, Romanoff this is gonna sound super weird but I’m gonna need you to unzip your jumpsuit.”

“I- It’s too cold.” Y/n stands up, wrapping one of Romanoff’s arms over her shoulder once more. “We are going to sit on the floor in front of the fireplace then, because I can’t have you dying on me here.”

Y/n eased Romanoff on the floor, quickly sitting in front of her looking for the right supplies. “Your shoulder.”

“What about my shoulder Romanoff?”

“You’re bleeding through your jacket Y/n/l.” Y/n shrug,s finally pulling out the right supplies from the first aid kit. “I told you already. I’m fine.” Y/n flashes a quick smile, “Now you need to unzip that jumpsuit so you can stop bleeding. Please.”

With a painful groan, she unzips the jumpsuit, revealing a black sports bra and a nasty wound not so far below it before tying the upper part of her jumpsuit to her waist. “Okay, you shouldn’t need that many stitches. Can you lean back a bit?”

Leaning back, Romanoff could already feel the sharp sting of alcohol. She was in pain, but trying to hide it. “You wanna talk?” Y/n asked, managing to keep her focus on cleaning the wound. “What do you mean talk?” Y/n shrugs, not breaking her focus, “Anything,” she glances up at the redhead. “It usually helps me forget about what’s happening.”

Romanoff lets out a dry chuckle, “I don’t think I’m in a talking mood.”

“What if I ask questions and you just answer them? It’s less effort,” Y/n grins. “And it’s the least you could do for me after I dragged you for two miles in a snowy forest.”

“I told you I could walk fine on my own.”

“Yet you didn’t bother to stop me once on the way here.” Romanoff lets out a deep annoyed sigh, “Fine. Only five questions though.” Y/n glances up at her one more time with a subtle smile, “Deal. First question, what’s your name? In situations like these, I usually like to be on a first-name basis.”

“It’s Natasha, Romanoff.” Y/n pauses immediately, before tossing a cotton ball to the side with a playful smile plastered across her face. “Can I call you Nat then?” Natasha cracks a genuine half smile with Y/n’s being too infectious. “We’ll see, but that does count as one of your questions.”

“All right, all right, fine.” Y/n continues cleaning the wound. “So, third question, your accent, is it real?”

“No, but I’m sure it’ll become real over time.” Starting the first stitch Natasha winces, but Y/n just keeps talking. “So if you fake your accent, is that why you don’t talk a lot? So you don’t slip up.”

“I’m not afraid of slipping up. I think it makes things less complicated. Less questions are asked, usually.” Y/n slips out a loud sarcastic laugh finishing the second stitch. “Wow! I think you just made a joke!” Natasha smiles to herself, “I think I did. But you’re on to your last question.”

“Okay, why did you join SHIELD?” Y/n can see Natasha bite the inside of her cheek, regretting the question. “You don’t have to answer or anything I can-” Natasha stops her, “No, no it’s fine. Um, long story short I was part of the red room. Then I met a guy who gave me an opportunity to clear some red from my ledger and take down the red room. So I took it.”

“Have you thought of reclaiming the title Black Widow then? Maybe clear the red of the title itself, make it something good?” Natasha gives Y/n a mock shocked look, “I thought you agreed to just five questions?” Y/n shrugs with a smug grin, “I mean I finished up when you were talking about clearing your ledger. I figured I might be able to sneak one more in.”

“How about this, you take that jacket off and let me look at your shoulder that’s ‘just fine,’ then I might answer it.” Y/n collects all the bloody materials used to clean up Natasha’s wound, throwing them away. “And I told you it was just a flesh wound, Nat. I’m okay.”

“And flesh wounds still should be disinfected Y/n, sit down.” With a loud reluctant sigh, Y/n sits in front of her, unzipping her jacket and exposing the bloody shoulder with a small hole made by the bullet. After leaning back a little, Natasha Immediately starts cleaning the surrounding area of the bullet wound.

“What about you?” Natasha asks as she continues cleaning the wound. “What about me?” Instead of avoiding eye contact this time, Y/n keeps her eyes on Natasha. “Why did you join SHIELD?” Y/n smiles, “No, nope. You didn’t answer my question first.”

“Fine, I’ve thought of it. Now what about-” Natasha quickly pulls out the bullet in Y/n with tweezers, “you.” Y/n yelps in pain pressing a hand against her shoulder for a moment before letting Natasha get back to work. “Okay, next time give me a warning.” Natasha grins to herself, “You should hope there isn’t a next time.”

“You knew what I meant. Anyways, when it comes to your question I joined SHIELD because my best friend did. Before SHIELD her and I, Maria, we served as Marines together. But Fury realized could do more, be more if we joined SHIELD. And she saved me enough times back then for me to trust her.”

“Do you trust me?”

“Considering you are finishing patching up the shoulder I got shot in, I'd say yes. Not with my life though, yet.”

“Do you plan to trust me with your life?”

“I don’t see why not. Having just one person to trust like that is limiting.”

“Trusting me like that is dangerous though.”

“Sometimes you need to live life a little dangerously.”

//

“That was a good debrief Romanoff, although I think you could have left out the part about me complaining about the trees.” Natasha grins, “Maybe don’t complain about trees the next time we’re in a forest then Y/n/l.”

As Natasha starts to walk off to her bunk Y/n stops her, “Nat, wait.” Natasha has a faint smile visible on her lip. “Did you need something Y/n?”

“Not really, I was just wondering if you wanted to maybe train together sometime. You could even teach me that leg sweep move you did.” Natasha crosses her arms looking Y/n up and down for a second. “Yeah, we could do that. Just prepare to fall a lot.”

“Am I interrupting something?” Both women jump a little, Y/n specifically turning around to see who it is. “Oh! Maria! Ehm um, I mean Agent Hill. Did you need something?” Natasha starts backing away, “I think I’ll leave you two to whatever is going on.”

“Okay, I’ll talk more about that move tonight?” Natasha smiles, “Yeah. That works.” As Natasha walks out of earshot Maria immediately starts giggling. "I told you to be nice to her Y/n/l, but not that nice." Y/n looks at Maria with a slight blush coming onto her face. "Wait, what do you mean by that?"

Maria shrugs with a suggestive smile on her face, "Y'know what forget that, how'd the mission go." Y/n smiles bashfully, "Uh it was good, it went really well actually."

"You like her don't you?"

"W-what no. It's not like that." Maria smiles knowingly, "Oh it totally is like that." Y/n slaps Maria’s arm in embarrassment, "Shut up."

"For what it's worth," Maria glances over Y/n's shoulder, "it looks like she likes you too."

[storm-angel989]

Outside the Office Part Six

Hi All!

A trigger warning before you begin. It's only fair to reader that she learns the dark side of Valentino- the side he's so far he's kept hidden from her. This was a difficult one to write, but I hope you enjoy the juxtaposition between who Valentino is with reader, and the V's, and who he is with the rest of the world.

Enjoy- and as always, let me know your thoughts!

I stood in front of the mirror, Velvette behind me as she fixed a button on the back of my outfit for the day. Wonderment washed over me as I saw myself, my real self,  for the first time since I entered hell. 

I didn’t recognize the reflection. 

My features had grown clearer since my arrival. My hair, once broken and cut in a shaggy trim, was now blonder than blonde and my blue eyes seemed sharper. Velvette had stopped gluing fake nails on and instead opted to cover my natural nails in a hard polish. Gone was the exterior rough and tough soldier my father had raised, replaced by something ethereal, something beautiful.

“Totally different than when you first came here, right?” Velvette asked as she saw me stare at myself. “Hell looks good on you.” 

I couldn’t argue with that. I had fully settled into my life with the V’s. Each morning I woke up alone in my bed, ate breakfast, hit the gym and the shower and went to see Velvette. She dressed me to her pleasing and either she or Vox had my assistance for the remainder of their work day. 

“Alright. Vox said he needs you today, so off you go. Oh! And check out last night's posts. You looked lit, girl.” 

My head buried in my phone as I reviewed the sinstergram photos, I hit the elevator button without looking and stepped out onto what I assumed was Vox’s floor. 

It was the scent that hit me first, a mix of sweet strawberries and sweat. 

I looked up from my phone,  expecting to see the entryway to Vox’s studio. Instead, I came face to face with a bed surrounded by lights. In the center of it lay a demon, naked, bound and gagged. He struggled as two larger demons held her down. 

His screams were muffled, but piercing. I watched as blood trickled out of him, its source unknown. I watched the demons fumble as they ungagged him and he looked straight ahead to the directors chair. 

“Punish me, Daddy.” 

The larger demon grabbed him by the throat and slammed him against the bed. From where I stood, his eyes grew larger and he laid back as the demons mounted him again. From the side I watched Valentino backhand another demon before taking the glass on the tray. The demon flinched and skittered away. 

What the fuck had I just walked into?

“Cut! That’s a wrap!” He demanded, his voice sharper than I had ever heard it. He stood up, glass in hand as he made his way down the hallway.

Against my better judgment, I followed him. Much like the hotel I had once stayed in with my father, numbered doors lined either side of the hallways, some open, some closed. I caught a glimpse of what was inside the open ones. Bedrooms, lounge areas and even a hospital bed. The walls between rooms were decked out with photos of naked actors, all with Valentino’s name at the bottom. I felt a sick feeling in my gut as I continued to trail behind him quietly. This wasn’t my Valentino. 

He pushed open a door and I peered in from the doorway. I watched him study a group of demons, taking a drag of his cigarette and exhaling a cloud of red smoke into one of their faces. The demon inhaled deeply and gave him a dirty smile, reaching out and grabbing his jacket. “Thank you, Daddy.” 

“Her. She’s perfect. Bring her to studio two. Now. I want that cunt I signed on earlier today in studio one. Be rough. Our deal needs to be finalized, and she better get what she signed up for.” He growled to the demon behind him. He yanked her hands off of him, and turned as if to walk back out the door.  I saw him turn towards me and I quickly stepped back, skittering across the hall, stepping inside the room and behind the open door. 

Thankfully, Valentino hadn’t seen me. I held my breath as I waited for him to pass by. I stepped out from behind the door and he was gone. I looked around the room I was in, my instincts screaming that I was in danger. The inside was dimly lit.  White powder was spread in neat lines all along one table. Another held vials and what looked like used syringes.  I started to put Valentino’s narcotics comment from all those weeks ago together with the scene. 

Fuck, Val wasn't joking.

“Hey! New girl! What are you doing out of your room?” I heard an angry voice behind me. 

I turned to face them, preparing to defend myself. I landed a few blows before rough hands grabbed me, pinning me to the wall. Adrenaline rushed through me as my instincts kicked in. Face to face with two giant, hairy demons, I punched, kicked and fought as best I could. 

Unfortunately, I was no match for them. One twisted my arm and I heard myself cry out in pain. 

“Aw, did Daddy not give you your fix?” the demon taunted, leaning in closer. “Aww, poor little thing. You asked for this, sweetheart. Just remember that.” 

“Valentino!” I screamed. 

The sting of being backhanded knocked the wind out of me. I gritted my teeth and kicked as I continued to struggle. It was like being in my prisoner of war training camp all over again. Much like my father had taught me, I did my best to shut down and let my survival instincts take over. They would not get what they wanted from me. 

“Stop being a fucking bitch.” He snarled, picking me up and slamming me into the wall. “Or I will bring you to Val. Let him deal with the worthless slut you are.”

“That’s what I want you fucking moron!” I snarled. “Bring me to Valentino!”

Both demons snorted in amusement. 

“I’ve had enough of this shit. Just drug her. I’m not fighting dirty whores in front of Val.” The bigger demon snarled and shoved a cloth over my nose and mouth. I held my breath as I kicked, trying my hardest to get away from whatever it was they wanted to do to me.  

“Fucking dumb bitch!” he snarled. I felt his fist make contact with my chest and I involuntarily gasped as I fell to the ground. My world went dizzy, and I felt my body hit the hard floor.  

“Yeah, that’s it. You like your high don’t you, you little slut?” I felt cold chains wrap around me and my body, helpless under the influence of whatever they had given me, was dragged out of the room. 

“Hehe, you can tell she’s fresh meat. Look how little it took to get her there.” 

I felt my body being pushed down and the next time I came to I was sitting upright in a chair, my arms bound behind me and my legs tied together. I realized though my haze that I save for the chains around my neck and body, was totally and completely naked. 

“Hehe. The little slut comes to..” 

My throat felt parched and I could taste blood. I struggled against the bonds that held me in place. My entire body tingled, swollen and bruised. No amount of workout during my time in the military could have prepared me for this. I tried my best to look around, to figure out where I was.  I could barely make out the bed next to me, bright lights and empty directors chair I had seen earlier in the day. 

Another hot slap across the face. 

“Wake up. Otherwise, you’ll piss off  Mr. Valentino.”  The demon yanked on the chain around my neck, choking me with each painful breath I took. He leaned in closer. “Remember, you’re the bitch who scratched her dumb name on the line.” 

I wanted to struggle, but my body wouldn’t let me. I felt harsh hands on my thighs. No! Angel’s didn’t- I didn’t and I hadn’t. My back arched from the pain as he spread my legs wide open before walking away. 

“Hehe, look at her. She’s already dripping. Val will be pleased."

“Alright, let’s take it from the top!” Valentino’s familiar voice echoed across the studio. “Fucking bitches, this the new girl? God, she better be worth more than the last three fuckwits you assholes brought in.” His smile flowed across the studio. “Alright sweetheart, give me a reason to sign you on.” 

I could smell the familiar smoke and tried to fight against my restraints. Val promised he wouldn’t hurt me. Val wouldn’t do this to me. Val wouldn’t… 

Realization struck. He didn’t know it was me. 

“And action. Show me some struggle, babydoll.” 

I couldn’t struggle if I wanted to. The bright light burned my eyes as I willed myself to move, even a little. A few seconds passed and Valentino cursed again.

“For fucks sake, how much did you give her? Christ this isn’t a corpse film. Though I’m sure there is a kink for that. You there! Write that down. Could be a fucking million dollar idea.”

The shrill shriek of Valentino’s phone cut through the air. I closed my eyes and somewhere in me I felt my body start to grow cold and my thoughts drift away. Fuck. That wasn't good. 

“What do you mean, you can’t find her?” Valentinos voice roared across the studio. The familiar voice, except this time full of anger screamed and I watched a glass shatter against the wall. From the directors chair, Valentino stood, surrounded by a cloud of red smoke. 

I could barely see Vox’s face popping up on the big screen to the left. Vox’s voice echoed across the room. 

“Her vitals are linked to my watch, but something is jamming the location signal. Based on the past half hour of data, wherever she is Val, she’s hurt- bad. And there is only one teeny tiny place in this entire building that could jam that signal.” 

I heard the crack of a gunshot and the TV went black. I heard Valentino stomp around the studio, his boots coming closer to the chair where I sat. 

Valentino stood in front of me at full height. I felt the familiar claw grab my face, could feel the warmth of the red smoke burn against my skin and heard the slew of curse words rush out of his mouth. The chains that held me down vanished as sharp as the gunshots that went off next to me. In as much as I could move, I cowered and watched the expression on his face melt from anger to absolute horror.  

“Fuck!” 

Six gunshots went off as he lifted me up, tossing his red jacket over me as he held me against his body. I could feel the cold metal of his second gun press against my bare hip as he carried me across the studio into a smaller room. I gripped him, the raw feeling of security running through me as my skin touched his. I closed my eyes. It wasn’t him who hurt me. It wasn’t him who hurt me. 

 He slammed the door behind him, shaking the entire frame. “Fuck fuck fuck.” He cursed. 

He set me on a desk and I pitched forward into his shoulder, closing my eyes. Please don’t let me go Val, the thought flitted through my mind. 

“Fuck. No, stay awake.” he commanded frantically. 

I heard banging, the sound of frantic rummaging through drawers and then his hands rubbing my thigh. A pinch. 

“Come on babydoll. Stay awake for me.” 

“What the fuck Val?” Vox’s voice echoed through the room, electricity cracking. 

The rush and the buzzing in my brain slowed. The fog that had threatened darkness only moments ago began to drift away. I opened my eyes just enough to see Vox rush across the room.  His usual suit jacket and red bow tie were gone, and instead his white shirt was unbuttoned, sleeves rolled up to the elbows. He must have come running out of his office to be seen in such a state. 

“What the fuck have I told you about shooting up the studio? What was the reason this fucking time? And where the fuck did she go?” A pause and another angry yell. 

“What the fuck happened?!” 

Valentino pulled me against him, lifting me up off the desk. “I won’t know until she tells me. But if you can’t control your anger Vox, you need to leave. Go review the fucking cameras and try to figure out how the FUCK she ended up gagged and bound in my studio!” 

Vox cursed and I heard the crackle of electricity as he stormed out of the room. Valentino looked pained as he cupped my chin, tilting my head towards him.  

“You won’t be able to walk, mi a more. I’m sorry. I don’t know how long those drugs were in you, but I’m sure I didn’t stop them soon enough.” He cradled me against his chest, and each step he took sent a jolt of pain through my body. “I’m going to take you upstairs, princessa. Alright?” 

I couldn’t have protested if I wanted to. I laid limp as I heard him open the door. He stopped moving, my line of sight blurring as I tried to make sense of the office we were about to leave. 

“Don’t look.” He commanded, using a free hand to cover my eyes before he started walking again. “You don’t want to see.” 

He was probably right. It wasn’t like I could open my eyes up very far anyway. I could feel the bruising start to set in, washing me in pain. I felt the motion of the elevator and I blacked out.

“This is going to burn, I’m sorry mi amor.” Was the next thing I heard Valentino say.  

I yelped as the hot water touched my skin and tried to hold onto him as he lowered me into the bath. 

“We have to get you cleaned up.” He said evenly, almost as if to himself. “I’m sorry- it won’t feel nice.” 

I whimpered as he carefully titled my head back under the running water. Almost instantly, the water went from clear to red. Panic began to set in. 

Vox’s voice behind him. “Lucifer knows.” 

“And?” Val asked steadily. “ You’re safe now, love. I’ve got you. Keep your eyes closed for me.” 

I felt his fingers move gently through my hair, moving my head out from under the water. “You’re alright princessa. You can open your eyes now if you want to. I’m here.”

I blinked a few times, trying to make out his features. They were still fuzzy. 

“He wants to know who is responsible.” Vox’s voice continued. 

“That person is dead.” Valentino replied flatly. 

“He wants to see the video. He wants heads, Val.” 

“Then he can have mine. After she’s taken care of. And for fucks sake, close the door behind you, Vox. Give her some shred of dignity.” Valentino lifted up my arm and ran the cloth over it. His thumb ran over the bruises that had bloomed, and anger boiled in his eyes, but he kept the gentle touch. 

I tried to choke back the panic as he ran his hands over my body. Flashes of the studio, my mind fuzzy. No, it wasn’t Val who hurt me- but I needed him away from me. Just for a minute, while I tried desperately to make sense of it all. 

“Never thought I’d hear the day you’d say someone is deserving of that.” Vox stated. “Shit, she’s really beat up.” 

“Please, Val- please. Don’t touch me. I need a minute. I’m sorry.” I finally choked out, pushing myself as far away from him as I could.

The realization came across his face and I watched his expression turn even more upset. “I won’t hurt you, I promise. You’re all taken care of for now, I’m going to let Vox take my place- alright? Vox. Please.” 

I watched him step back from the tub and Vox leaned over and gently ran his arm under mine, as if to help me stand up. 

A rush of darkness swept over me. I felt his power before he entered the room. Valentino moved to stand in front of Vox and I. 

“Where is she?” Lucifer’s voice echoed through the room, danger and power crackling as the air swirled around us, tinged in black and red.  

The door slammed open and a burst of outside air hit my face. I winced against the sting, my mind clearing up even more. I reached for Valentino, my hand touching the back of his leg. He glanced down and took a step closer, shielding me from Lucifer. 

“She’s right here. She’s suffered enough without having another person see her without coverage. Lucifer- I promise you she’s being taken care of. Please. Let me finish with her and get her covered up. Then you can have her.” Valentino answered calmly. 

The voice that was Lucifer roared and a flash of red and black flames wrapped around Vox and Valentino. Something inside my mind cleared up and I willed myself to yell. 

“No. Uncle Lucy, stop. Please.” I choked out as best I could, sinking beneath the water as I tried to hide myself. “Uncle Lucy! Stop!” 

The flames vanished. Silence filled the room. 

“Just…just stop. He didn’t do it to me. They didn’t hurt me, Uncle Lucy.” I felt my voice grow stronger. “Please, stop!” 

“You weren't kept safe either.” He snarled. “They didn’t do the one FUCKING thing they needed to do!” 

“Uncle Lucy, please.” I begged as loudly as I could. “It wasn’t their fault. Free will, remember? I- I hit the wrong button. I went into the studio. I followed Valentino- they told me not to! They told me to stay out of his work area and I disobeyed. It's my fault.” 

I could feel Lucifer’s power recede. 

“It was not your fault.” Valentino said softly, reaching down and offering his hand. 

I took it and gave it a gentle squeeze. No, if anything it was the demons who pinned me down. I had questions, questions that needed to be answered. But now wasn’t the time. 

“Angels see the best in everyone, don’t they?” Lucifer snarled, frustration evident in his voice.

With each passing second I remembered more and more of how I had ended up in this situation in the first place. 

“Half angel. Not everyone.” I answered finally. “But it isn’t Valentio’s fault. Or Vox’s I made those decisions- despite being warned not to. And besides, this is nothing compared to what I’m used to. Being battered and bruised is nothing for a former exorcist angel.” 

Lucifer sighed heavily and turned away. “When she’s cleaned and covered, bring her out to me.” The door slammed behind him and I jumped, wincing from the pain. 

“Do not blame yourself.” Valentio said softly. “What they did to you…shouldn’t have happened.” His voice dropped an octave. “Let me help you up, princessa. Please. I need to see how badly you are hurt.”

I used what strength I had to lean into Valentino and slowly stood up, shaking as pain once again flooded through my system. I gripped his arm as I tried to steady myself, stepping out of the bathtub.  

Both he and Vox cursed at the same time. I caught sight of myself in the full length mirror. My face sported bruises and two black eyes. My shoulders, chest, belly and thighs were a mix of bruises and cuts. Valentino gently turned me around and I saw him shake his head. 

“Mi amor, this should not have happened to you.” 

Vox quickly wrapped me in a towel and with another, Valentino gently dried my hair before sliding his tee shirt I slept in last night over my head. I leaned into him as he helped me step into a pair of loose pajama pants. I leaned into him for both balance and comfort. 

“Tell Lucifer that she’s covered.” Valentino said to Vox. “And that he should come assess her injuries.”  

I closed my eyes and leaned my full weight into him. The door opened a moment later and Lucifer walked in, radiating the black and red energy.

“It’s bad.” Valentino said to him simply. He turned his attention to me. “Princessa, will you let me lift up your shirt to show him?”

All three waited until I nodded. Carefully, Valentino lifted the hem of my shirt, exposing only the bruises on my belly. 

“She needs to go to the hospital. Now.” Lucifer said sharply. 

“No.” My voice wasn’t loud but it was audible. “I don’t. Angels heal quickly. I should know. This isn’t the worst I’ve ever been beaten. I promise.” I grimaced. “ My dad would have told me to throw some dirt on it and get back out there. I promise, I’ll be fine in a day or two.” 

All three looked horrified at the idea. 

Lucifer gritted his teeth. “Angels may be fucked up like that, but down here sweetheart, you’re my responsibility. And this isn’t a matter of your decision. Sorry to say.” Lucifer’s voice grew louder with each word, the anger pulsing in his voice.

 I shrank back against Valentino. The idea of letting someone else see me naked today was mortifying at best. “I thought I had free will.” I said shakily. 

That seemed to resonate. Lucifer gave me a hard, frustrated look. “Fine. Let’s make a deal then. I get a doctor over here right now- a real doctor. And a nurse. They can examine you here. And if he says you need to go to the hospital, you go without complaint. Do we have a deal?” 

I looked at Valentino, then to Vox. Both nodded. 

“Deal.” I whispered. 

Bright red and black tinged chains appeared on both my wrist and Lucifers’ vanishing as soon as they appeared. I looked at Valentino, hoping he would elaborate. Neither he nor Vox seemed to even notice their brief existence. 

“For fucks sake.” Lucifer said as he walked out of the room, dialing on his phone. 

I could hear him barking orders from the other room. 

“Let's get you to lay down.” Valentino suggested, gently guiding me out of the bathroom. He laid me on my side on my purple blanket and I did my best to bite back the pain that shook me. I gritted my teeth. Of all the questions I had,  I needed to know exactly what they had done to me. 

With Lucifer out of earshot, I looked to Vox. “What did they do to me? I need details. All of them.” I paused. “I deserve to know what happened to my body.” 

Anger pulsated through Valentio’s eyes. 

Vox put his hand on Valentino’s shoulder, and then turned his attention to me. “If you’re asking if you were raped- you wern’t. Just drugged and beaten. You’re lucky they mistook you for Valentino’s newest employee, otherwise you wouldn’t have been so fortunate.” He glanced at Valentino. “Despite appearances, every person in that studio is required to consent to what happens to them. His newest conquest hadn’t yet- not all the way. And that’s what saved you. Otherwise…” His voice trailed off. “That’s why I told you to stay the fuck out of his studio.”

“It isn’t her fault,” Valentino said sharply. “Her mistake did not earn her this violation. I should have made it clear at the start that she is one of us, and not part of my business.” Anger and frustration cracked through his voice. “You can be sure I will make it known going forward. This will never, ever happen again. I promise, princessa.” 

Vox opened his mouth to say something but closed it as the door opened. Two demons walked into the room, escorted by Lucifer. 

“One look at her belly and you’ll agree with me,” he mumbled to the doctor. He turned to me. “Sweetheart, let the doctor examine you. Please. I promise you, it's much more…technologically advanced than heaven’s version of medical care. And much less invasive.” 

I nodded my consent and let the doctor examine me, mindful of the three sets of watchful eyes on him as he worked. I winced as he gently pressed on my stomach, trying my hardest to maintain composure. The doctor took a small screen out of his bag, along with a small white wand. He ran a wand over my belly, and then to my chest. He studied the small screen with a practiced eye. Finally, he pulled the wand away.

“Shockingly, the injuries I thought I would see are not there. Everything is intact, none of her major organs are swollen or ruptured. Not even a cracked rib.”  He stated as he pulled his gloves off and tossed them to the side. “She’s very fortunate she’s only bruised.” 

He nodded to his nurse. “I’m going to put an IV in, take some blood and push a round of painkillers and  antibiotics, and hang a bag of fluids to rehydrate you. Just to be on the safe side, and make the next twenty four hours more comfortable. Otherwise, a week or two of rest and you should be fully healed.”  The doctor caught Valentino’s eye. “I’m sure you can take it out when the bag is empty.”

Lucifer gave Valentino a hard look. Valentino nodded, an expression I couldn’t quite read flitting across his features. 

“I told you guys, Angels are tough.” I said lightly as I held out my arm for the nurse. “We heal fast too, just fyi.”

Lucifer looked at me, clearly displeased. “That’s good to know dear. Thank you for sharing.” 

The nurse slipped the IV in and pushed two vials of liquid before setting a bag above my head. The doctor stood up, and talked quietly to the three of them. After a few moments, he turned to me. 

“If something doesn’t feel right, let Lucifer know and I’ll come back. Otherwise, I’ll be back in two weeks.” 

Across the room, Lucifer opened the door to walk them out. I could hear the scrabble of frantic footsteps and Velvette burst into the room, shoving him aside.

“The fuck?” Lucifer demanded, watching as she darted across the room.

“With all due respect, go fuck yourself, your highness. How dare you keep me out of the room?” Velvette snarled, standing next to me. “Jesus fuck, are you alright reader?”

Lucifer’s expression turned from annoyed to amused. He, the doctor and nurse walked out of the room, the door closing behind them.

Vox grabbed her waist. “Hey hey, calm down Vel. She’s fine.”

“She doesn’t look it. Who did this? I’ll fucking kill them. Touching my reader.”

“I already took care of that Vel. Breathe.” Valentino said gently. 

“Doc said I’m fine, so I’m fine Velvette. I’ll be okay. Trust me- I’ve been through worse.” I said lightly.

“Toughness has nothing to do with it,” Velvette added, arms crossed. “Though I’m glad you’ll be okay. Gotten used to having a fourth V.”

“My name is reader though, I can’t be a V.” 

She snorted. “Being a V doesn’t mean your name has to start with V, you know. It’s about power, and toughness and you…ugh! I can’t believe this fucking happened.”

She turned to Valentino. If looks could kill, he would be dead on the floor. 

“And you. You need to come up with a plan so this never, ever fucking happens again. Bestie or not I will kill you my fucking self!” She reached up as high as she could and jabbed him with two fingers. 

Valentino gently took her hand and handed it to Vox. “I know Vel. Believe me, I know.”

“Alright, sweetheart, settle down. You’re right, she’s one of us.” Vox said softly, taking her hand and gently pulling her away.  “We’ll come up with a plan, the four of us. Tomorrow morning. I promise.” He glanced to me. 

“I have questions that need answers.” I said firmly. “So whatever plan you want to come up with is fine- but I want honest, full answers. From all of you.” I looked to Valentino meaningfully. “No ducking out or giving me half assed explanations. Is that fair?”

“Of course, princessa. Whatever you want.” Valentino answered immediately. 

Vox raised an eyebrow at Valentino. “Right. Agreed. Come on Vel, you need to settle down and reader should rest.”

“Don’t you tell me to settle down!” 

With that Vox lifted her up and hoisted her over his shoulder. She flopped against him and Vox sent me an apologetic look as he carried her out of the room, leaving me alone with Valentino. 

“Can I get you anything?” He asked softly, sitting next to me. 

I shook my head no. “I’m good, Val.” 

A few seconds later, Lucifer walked back and stood next to my bed, arms crossed. He shot Valentino a look and Valentino stood up and stepped off to the side. Lucifer reached forward and put his hand on my forehead. “I’ll be back tomorrow.” He hesitated. “Unless you want to come home with me? After this, I won’t force you to stay here.” 

I shook my head. “No. Lucifer, I stand by what I said. This was my fault.”

“It. Was. Not.” Valentino hissed. 

Lucifer raised an eyebrow to me and then looked at him. An expression crossed his face that I couldn’t quite read. 

“If you’re sure honey. I’ll see you in the morning, then.” 

And with that, he vanished. 

“Valentino.” I said softly. 

“Reader.” He returned to his seat next to me on the bed. 

I reached for him and he hesitated. “Princessa, you don’t…”

“Hold me. Please? Val…please.” 

He laid down next to me and carefully laid my head against his chest. The feeling of security once again flooded through me. I pushed my head into his chest. 

“Careful, mi amor. When the….” he hesitated, searching for the right word. “Medicine the doctor gave you wears off, you’re going to feel every bruise.” 

“I’ll heal fast. Don’t worry. Again…not the worst beating I’ve ever taken.” 

He tilted my chin up, studying my face. “You’re asking the impossible, mi amor. After tonight, I don’t think I’ll do anything but worry.” He guided my head back to my chest. “You said you had questions, my love. Your reaction to this….event, the things you have said…lead me to have questions for you. I promise to answer honestly if you promise to answer mine the same. In the morning. Tonight, I need you to sleep. Do we have an agreement?”

I noticed he didn’t say the word deal. 

“We do.” 

“Good. Then please, princessa. Sleep.” He tucked his head against mine.

 I closed my eyes against his chest, listening to his heart beat steadily. 

“You’re safe, as long as you’re in my arms. I promise.” I heard him whisper, feeling him kiss the top of my head. “I promise.” 

[makeitmingi]

The Cat and Dog Game [Chapter 12]

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Yunho x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Chef!Reader, RestaurantOwner!Yunho, MaitreD!Hongjoong, Waiter!Yeosang, Waiter!San, Waiter!Mingi, SousChef!Seonghwa, SousChef!Wooyoung, PrepChef!Jongho

Summary: Yunho's dream was to open and run his own restaurant. But he doesn't know anything when it comes to cooking. Until you came along and accepted the job, bringing with you a small crew. How will the black cat tame the energetic golden retriever?

Word count: 3.2K

In the middle of the morning shift, the door opened and a much smaller body entered the store alone. He walked up to the counter, eyes able to peer over the top.

"Excuse me." He said.

"Yes, can I help-" Mingi blinked in confusion, looking at a blank space in front of him. He was sure he heard someone. That was when he looked down and saw the child standing there, looking back up at him with a tilted head.

"One hot chocolate, please." The child ordered. Mingi, stunned to the point where he couldn't speak, merely nodded in reply and keyed in the order.

"₩6,500..." Mingi said with uncertainty. The child took his wallet out, putting the money on the tray and Mingi handed him his change.

"Counter at the end." He instructed.

"Thank you. Have a nice day." The child walked over to the end to wait. Mingi looked around the cafe, who did this child belong to? Where did he come from?

"What's with you?" Hongjoong asked, noticing how Mingi was standing there, scratching his head.

"You see the child too, right hyung?" Mingi leaned over to whisper. Hongjoong looked over at the child that was waiting for San to make his hot chocolate for him. Hongjoong nodded his head in confirmation. Mingi let out a sigh of relief, at least he wasn't hallucinating or anything.

"It's just a kid, Mingi. Are you afraid of kids or something?" Hongjoong raised an eyebrow.

"I'm not. Just stunned that the kid seems to be on his own. He looks young but speaks like an adult." Mingi said. Hongjoong shrugged, going to carry on with his tasks.

"Do you need help bringing this to your table?" San asked as he handed the kid his cup of hot chocolate.

"No, thanks. I can handle it." He replied, carrying the cup carefully with two hands and finding a booth to sit down to enjoy his drink.

"That kid is cute and cool." San chuckled. He watched the kid sit at the booth, sipping his drink like an adult. He unzipped his backpack, taking his book and pencil out.

"What are you all staring at?" Yunho and Yeosang came.

"They enamoured by some kid." Hongjoong scoffed as he passed by, going to the back kitchen. Yeosang let out an amused laugh while Yunho was curious, what was a kid doing here alone? There wasn't any schools nearby.

"Hey there." Yunho approached the kid with a friendly smile and a cookie that he had on a plate. The kid stopped writing in his workbook and looked up at Yunho.

"You can have this." Yunho placed the plate with the cookie on the table. The kid stared at the treat for a while.

"No, thanks. I'm not supposed to accept things from strangers." He shook his head.

"Oh! I, uh, own this cafe. It's completely safe, don't worry." Yunho assured. He thought the kid would just take the cookie. Noticing the hesitation, Yunho broke off a bit and took a bite.

"See? Clean." Yunho said as he chewed. The kid stared at him oddly. Now reviewing his actions, Yunho admits he shouldn't have done that.

"Anyway, so are you here alone?" Yunho asked.

"There's no one else at this table here besides you and me so yes, I am on my own. For now. I am actually waiting for someone." The kid replied, taking a sip of his hot chocolate. Yunho nodded his head, this kid was fiesty but the way he spoke kind of reminded him of someone familiar.

"Who are you waiting for? Is it your parents?" Yunho continued to ask the kid questions in the kindest, sweetest voice he could muster. This kid was mighty cute.

"No, my parents were the ones that dropped me off. I'm actually here for my girlfriend." The kid spoke.

"G-Girlfriend?" Yunho's eyes widened. This kid looked to only be about 10 years old, how can he have a girlfriend?

"Noona!" The kid beamed, sliding off the booth and running away.

"Noona?" Yunho frowned, confused. He turned around to see the kid attached to you, hugging you tightly. You looked surprise for a moment before a small smile appeared on your face.

"Kyungmin ah. What are you doing here?" You asked, bending down to hug the child.

"I'm here to see you!" The kid, or Kyungmin, replied with a grin.

"Does your brother know you're here?" You raised an eyebrow. Kyungmin shook his head. You let out a sigh, reaching out to hold Kyungmin's hand and leading him into the kitchen. Yunho got up, going over to the serving window to peek.

"Yah, did omma and appa just drop you off here? They didn't even tell me anything." Wooyoung rolled his eyes, going to retrieve his phone while Kyungmin was attached to you at the hip.

"Are you hungry? Shall I make you something to eat?" You offered, looking down at him.

"Yeah. The strange ahjusshi outside offered a cookie but I didn't take it." Kyungmin said. You frowned slightly.

"That's good, Kyungie. You should never take food from strangers. But what strange ahjusshi?" You bent down, holding his shoulders. Yunho choked and let out a yelp.

"That strange ahjusshi." Kyungmin pointed to Yunho.

"W-Wait! I am not strange nor am I an ahjusshi!" Yunho said, stumbling into the kitchen.

"Kyungie, he owns the place. He's our boss." You explained. Kyungmin looked over at Yunho, eyeing him up and down. Yunho gulped, feeling the scrutiny of the small child.

"I made quiche lorraine. Shall I get you a slice?" You asked. Kyungmin nodded excitedly and you both walked out of the kitchen. You grabbed one of the last slices of quiche from the display cabinet, putting it on a plate and going to sit with Kyungmin at the booth he was at previously.

"Sorry about that, Yunho. That's my little brother, Kyungmin. I hope he wasn't too much trouble, I had no idea my parents were going to drop him off." Wooyoung bowed.

"No need to apologise. He's cute with a sharp tongue." Yunho chuckled.

"I have no idea who he gets it from. He doesn't even speak like a kid his age, way too sassy." Wooyoung shook his head.

"Really? You have no idea where he gets it from?" Seonghwa asked in disbelief with raised eyebrows. Jongho snickered while Wooyoung glared at the two.

"He told me he's here to meet his girlfriend?" Yunho scratched the back of his neck.

"About that. He's in love with (y/n), always calls her his girlfriend. Always saying he's going to marry her. But ignore him, he's just a kid." Wooyoung said. Yunho laughed but looked out to see you smiling at the kid eating in adoration.

"She'll never look at anyone else like that except Kyungmin. She doesn't even look at Seonghwa hyung like that." Jongho laughed, making Seonghwa jab him.

"Okay, buddy. Let (y/n) go pack up her things." Wooyoung said when he was done cleaning up.

"I'll be back." You patted Kyungmin's head and went to the kitchen.

"Sorry. You guys start on the dinner prep first, I'll be quick." You apologised to Seonghwa and Jongho, going to clear your station and wash your utensils.

"I didn't know you're a fan of kids." Yunho cleared his throat. You dried your tongs, putting them into your wrap.

"I'm not. I don't like kids." You replied.

"Kyungmin is an exception. You've heard the way he talks and seen the way he acts. He's a great kid and I think compared to other kids, he's way cuter." You said, clearing your throat in slight embarrassment, realising that you might be overly gushing over a kid that isn't even related to you.

"He seems to adore you and look up to you, that's cute." Yunho giggled.

"Do you not think I'm someone worthy of being looked up to?" You questioned, turning to him. Yunho's eyes widened, immediately shaking his hands.

"N-No! I mean, yes! Wait, no. W-What I meant was, there's no better person to look up to! I-I think it's cute that he does." He stuttered.

"I'm kidding, Yunho. Chill." You patted his shoulders.

"Don't do that." He let out a sigh of relief. You let out a small laugh, going to help Seonghwa and Jongho with the prep for dinner tonight. Yunho went out to help his friends.

"So he's Wooyoung's brother. They're both fiesty I guess." San laughed as he wiped the coffee mugs.

"He apparently doesn't see where Kyungmin gets it from. I knew his attitude reminded me of someone. But he seems very close with (y/n). She also seems so taken by him." Yunho said, leaning against the counter.

"Are you jealous of a kid?" Yeosang asked.

"Jealous? What's there to be jealous about?" Yunho turned to him. Yeosang shrugged while Yunho tilted his head in confusion. Mingi laughed, patting Yunho's shoulder.

"Who knows, (y/n) might be taken to you because of your kid-like nature too." Mingi teased.

"I'm not a kid! And (y/n) isn't 'taken to me'." Yunho frowned.

"He's right. He's not a kid. He's an overgrown puppy." Hongjoong laughed. Yunho had a flat look on his face as all his friends laughed at him. He sighed and went to clear one of the tables.

"I'm done." You poked your head out. Kyungmin jumped down excitedly, running to you.

"Yah! You didn't even pack your bag yet. Aish, this kid." Wooyoung helped Kyungmin pick up his things, stuffing it into his backpack and getting up. He brought Kyungmin's plate and cup to the back to be washed before bowing the the others to take his leave. San, Yeosang and Mingi bid him goodbye.

"(y/n) needs to rest before the busy dinner shift, Kyungmin. Let's go." Wooyoung said. Kyungmin pouted, holding your hand tightly, not wanting to part ways with you.

"I'll see you tonight, Kyungmin." You stroked his head. He looked up at you with his puppy eyes.

"Please can I go with you, noona?" He shook your hand.

"But I'm just going home to sleep, Kyungie. There's not much playing to do now. I think you can do much more fun things with your brother." You laughed.

"Uh, honestly, my plan was to sleep too..." Wooyoung scratched his head. You sighed.

"Why don't you and Kyungmin come back to mine then? There's a guestroom to sleep in. We can come back to the restaurant together." You suggested. Kyungmin's eyes brightened as he turned to Wooyoung and jumped excitedly.

"Yes! Yes!" Kyungmin cheered. Wooyoung sent you a sorry look but you smiled with a slight shake of your head, you didn't mind as long as Kyungmin was happy.

"Alright, we'll see you guys tonight then." Seonghwa and Jongho took Seonghwa's car while Wooyoung and Kyungmin sat in your car.

"So, Kyungie, how is school?" You asked as you drove. The boy sat in the back, swinging his legs back and forth.

"It's okay. I have a lot of friends there. The school food isn't too good though so I asked omma to pack me a lunch box." Kyungmin scrunched his nose, making you and Wooyoung laugh.

"Your hyung spoils you too much." You said.

"Me? Who is the one that made him a tasting plate of caviar blinis?" Wooyoung shot you a look.

"He has a good palate. Plus, I'll never forget his face when he first tried it. You could tell, he appreciates the flavours of the different toppings." You shrugged.

"Right..." Wooyoung scoffed. You drove home and immediately hopped into a shower. While waiting for your hair to dry, Kyungmin sat with you, doing his homework. You had an arm around him, leaning down to look at his work. You only helped him when he asked you for help.

"Oh, yeah. Kyungie, now that you're here." You stood up and went to the freezer. You put stuff in a small bowl and came back to the couch, handing him the bowl. Kyungmin put his workbook aside.

"Ice cream?" Kyungmin looked at you. You nodded your head, encouraging him to try the treat.

"I was just playing around with flavours and textures that you can put in ice cream." You said.

"It's nice." Kyungmin hummed happily, eating another bite. He scooped up a bite, holding up the spoon to offer you a bite. You leaned down to eat it.

"What do you taste, Kyungie?" You asked.

"It tastes like apple pie...?" He said, unsure of what he was tasting. He tasted it again to be sure.

"That's right, Kyungie." You patted his head. It was a vanilla ice cream base, which would usually be served on top of apple pie. There were bits of cooked apple and graham cracker pieces stirred throughout the ice cream. And it was topped with a salted caramel sauce.

"(y/n), are you giving him ice cream?" Wooyoung walked over, fresh out of the shower.

"I wanted to test his palate." You defended.

"That's what you always say whenever you give him sweets." Wooyoung squinted his eyes at you. Both you and Kyungmin laughed, knowing you've been caught.

"I can't resist him." You pinched Kyungmin's cheek. Wooyoung scoffed, taking the space on the other side of Kyungmin.

"Go sleep." Wooyoung urged you. You looked at the clock and realised there wasn't much time left.

"I'll see you later, Kyungie." You stood up and went to your room.

You didn't really sleep, you just laid in bed, scrolling on your iPad and reading your cooking notes. Suddenly, your bedroom door opened and Kyungmin teetered in. You guessed that he must have snuck away from Wooyoung. You lifted your head slightly, patting the space beside you.

"Can I sleep here? Wooyoung hyung is hogging the entire bed." He mumbled, rounding the bed and climbing under the covers beside you. You laughed and nodded.

"He always spreads his limbs out." You said and continued to read, feeling him snuggle against your side.

"Is he here?" You hadn't realised how much time had passed until Wooyoung poked his head in, looking for Kyungmin.

"Yeah." You whispered, pointing to the small lump beside you.

"Go wash up. I'll wake him up." He came in. You nodded and Wooyoung came over to help you up, careful to not disturb Kyungmin yet. He patted your hip as you went to the bathroom.

"My parents will come to the restaurant for dinner and take Kyungmin home with then after." Wooyoung said as you came out.

"Okay." You tied your hair up. Kyungmin rubbed his eyes and yawned, perched on the bed beside Wooyoung. You used your fingers to comb his messy hair, going back to the bathroom and grabbing a wet cloth to wipe his face for him.

"Good nap?" You laughed. Kyungmin nodded, reaching up to hug you. He was just like Wooyoung, he likes hugs.

"Is your older brother coming tonight too?" You turned to Wooyoung.

"No, he's working late at his internship." He replied. You went to your closet to get clothes to change into while Wooyoung and Kyungmin gathered their things.

"Ready?" You grabbed your keys as the boys were waiting for you in the living room.

Just as your car pulled up, Seonghwa and Jongho's cars arrived too. You and Jongho put your arms around each other.

"Hi Kyungmin." Seonghwa patted the younger boys head with a small smile. Since Seonghwa, Wooyoung, Jongho and you worked closely together, you were all familiar with each other's families. Mostly.

Also, coincidentally, all the families had boys only so you were the darling daughter to the three boys' parents.

"Seonghwa hyung!" Kyungmin smiled, reaching to hold Seonghwa's hand as they headed into the restaurant together. Wooyoung set up a small table and chair for Kyungmin in the locker room to wait until dinner service, not wanting him to be in the way while the team prepared the food.

"No giving Kyungmin any sweets. He's having dinner with my parents later and I don't want them nagging me." Wooyoung announced, giving you a pointed look.

"What?" You snapped back with a growl. Seonghwa chuckled, shaking his head.

"Please, your parents love (y/n) more than you. You could just use her as your defense." Jongho shrugged.

"Wow. Thanks, Jong." You rolled your eyes.

"But we know they'll never blame her. Mrs Jung will still somehow pin the blame on Wooyoung." Seonghwa said, going into the walk in to grab his ingredients.

"Hello!" Yunho entered with a smile. As he entered the locker room, he almost yelled as he was shocked by Kyungmin inside.

"Oh, it's the weird ahjusshi." Kyungmin blinked.

"I-I'm not a weird ahjusshi! I'm the same age as your brother!" Yunho exclaimed. Kyungmin laughed, obviously having fun teasing a very reactive Yunho. Clearing his throat, Yunho put his bag and coat down before heading back out.

"Yah, Kyungmin ah. He's a hyung." Wooyoung poked his head in. Kyungmin nodded, giving Wooyoung a thumbs up before going back to the game he was playing on Wooyoung's iPad.

"This kid..." Wooyoung sighed and went back to prep work. Yunho flocked to your side, 'offering assistance' with his puppy like enthusiasm and grin.

"There's really not much to do now since we did prep earlier, Yunho." You spoke.

"Aww, really?" Yunho pouted.

"Would you rather us be scrambling around in a state of chaos now then?" You cast him a side glance. Yunho was shocked, stuttering and shaking his head.

"T-That's not what I meant, of course! I would never want you to be in that state! Or the whole kitchen. What I meant was-"

"Relax, I was just teasing you." You chuckled. Yunho huffed but deep down, he was glad that you felt more relaxed around him to be able to joke with him freely now. He could sense that you were less guarded around him, which he was glad for. Not wanting to assume, Yunho still hadn't asked to be your friend yet.

"Hey, Yunho. My parents are coming for dinner tonight. There's still a table available for them, right?" Wooyoung asked.

"Of course. I'll give them a booth so they can sit comfortable with Kyungmin." Yunho nodded, not even needing to check the reservations in the store system.

"Thanks." Wooyoung smiled. Yunho went out, taking Hongjoong's store iPad and adding the reservation in.

"Hello~" Yunho heard the other boys arrive.

"Hey, it's the little man." Mingi grinned, waving to Kyungmin when they saw him sitting in the locker room. Kyungmin looked up at Mingi, Yeosang, San and Hongjoong.

"I'm not little. I'm the average height for my age. You're just overgrown and if anything, he's the little man along with my brother." Kyungmin said.

"Hey!" Hongjoong frowned. Mingi just stood there, wide eyed at this kid's words.

"He got you there, hyung!" Yeosang and San burst out laughing. Wooyoung, who had heard all the commotion and laughing came over, wondering what was going on. He looked at an annoyed Hongjoong and a stunned Mingi.

"Your little brother just called you and Hongjoong hyung short. And Mingi, overgrown. He's so funny." San said in between laughs. Yeosang couldn't even speak.

"Yah, Jung Kyungmin." Wooyoung glared at the boy.

"Need you guys out to set up for dinner service." Yunho called out. San patted Kyungmin's head as he walked past.

"I guess he's definitely Wooyoung's brother." Yeosang said, still chuckling. Hongjoong shot him a flat look, going over to take his reservation iPad out.

"Alright, let's do this." Yunho smiled.

~

Series masterlist

[anniebeemine]

an old flame-s.r.

Warnings: alcohol consumption, pure fluff, allusions to sex

“Dr. Spencer Reid!” You gushed, opening the door to your apartment. “It’s been far too long.” 

He pulled you into a hug, using one hand to wrap around your waist and the other to push his bag to his side. “How have you been, Y/N?” 

“Good.” You invited him and his friends in. They kicked off their shoes. “Sorry for the mess, I’m in the process of rearranging everything.” 

Spencer took note of the carpet rolled up, carefully stepping over it. He settled down at the dining room table. “These are Agents Derek Morgan and Emily Prentiss,” he said, “we were hoping you’d be able to help us with something.”  

You sat across from him, Morgan and Prentiss taking two more spaces. “It’s so nice to finally meet you guys. Spencer talks about you guys all the time.” 

Prentiss shared a look with Morgan. Not that you’d ever have noticed, seeing as you were too busy taking in Spencer’s new look. You hadn’t seen him in a little over a year. His hair had gotten longer, brushing his shoulders with each step. You’d met a few years ago in a phd program, sharing drafts of your work for peer reviews. Over time, things grew personal but your job kept you in Chicago, his in Washington DC. 

“We’re here to ask for your expertise,” he said. “There’s been a list of transients who have gone missing.” 

You nodded, your mind already racing as you recalled the weekends spent at various homeless shelters. It had started as a volunteer effort, a way to give back to the community while pursuing your studies and teaching style. Little did you know, those weekends would become the foundation for your understanding of a shadowed corner of society.

“Thank you, Dr. Y/L/N,” Agent Prentiss smiled. “Please let us know if you think of anything else.” 

You nodded as you followed the trio out of your apartment. “Of course. I’ll give you guys a call if I hear or see anything.” 

Spencer lingered in the doorway for a few minutes, waiting until his friends were out of earshot. “I’ll see you before I leave,” he whispered. 

You grinned. “You know where I’ll be.” 

“Reid!” 

He left with a wave and a tight lipped smile. Upon entering the elevator, he felt his smile fade as he slipped back into his job. 

“She seemed real excited to see you,” Emily teased. 

Spencer shook his head. “It’s not like that. We used to be classmates.” 

-

Spencer didn’t come by for three days. You were sitting in your apartment reading through a student’s character analysis on some old film that you could only find at a library. He tapped his fingers on the door before entering the apartment. You’d pretty much put everything away since he’d come by. A hint of lavender hung in the air, a recent addition that spoke of your efforts to reclaim this space as your own. The walls, adorned with artwork and photographs that had once celebrated a shared journey, now featured new additions—abstract paintings that reflected a journey of introspection and renewal.

“Hey,” you called, “one second. There’s plenty of stuff in the fridge if you’re hungry.” You continued circling misspellings on the paper. 

“Do you need help with those?” Spencer asked, sliding a paper over to him. “What class is this?” 

“Personality psych. It’s mostly freshmen looking for credit hours.” You looked up at him. “You're more than welcome to read through them. This is my last one.” 

He sat in silence as he read over one of the longer essays. You couldn’t help but be distracted by his hums of thought and looks of confusion. “Do you mind if I make some notes?”

“Go ahead,” you said, handing him a red pen. “I’m sure they’ll appreciate your feedback.”

As he marked up the paper, you felt a mixture of relief and unease. Spencer’s presence was comforting, yet the distance between you these past few days lingered like an unspoken question. After a few minutes, he looked up from the paper he was reading and smiled. "This one's really good. She's clearly being taught by the best."

You blushed, sure he was just being kind. “She's one of my brightest students.”

Spencer's smile grew warmer, and he shook his head slightly. "No, I mean it. You're an excellent teacher. It shows in their work."

The simplicity of his words felt like a lifeline. For a moment, the silence between you was filled with unspoken understanding.

“How have you been?” you asked, trying to bridge the gap.

“Busy,” he replied without looking up. “Cases have been non-stop.”

“I figured,” you said softly. “I missed you.”

He paused, pen hovering over the paper, before he glanced at you. “I missed you too.”

Spencer practically carried through your degrees. He’d read over your essays, umming and ahh-ing through your words. His notes were always constructive, never critical. You appreciated that someone could be so kind when reviewing your work. Despite being a literal genius, he never made you feel bad for not knowing things. The study group you were in dwindled, leaving just the two of you to have late nights together in the library. 

He’d stopped by the night before the commencement ceremony. You had a little apartment in a neighborhood a few train stops away from school, your first ever home away from your parents. Spencer came by, takeout in one hand and a book in the other. You let him in quickly, offering him a drink as he unpacked the food and rambled about the man in the small restaurant. 

“Would you like some?” You asked, holding a bottle of wine up. 

He looked nervous. “I’ve never had wine,” he admitted. 

You poured a little bit into a second glass. “Just for you to try, but you don’t have to.” 

After dinner, you rummaged through your small collection of board games, looking for something to keep the evening going. You pulled out a few options and spread them out on the coffee table.

“How about a game?” you suggested. “We have the Game of Life, Candyland, and some truth or dare cards.”

Spencer glanced at the options, his eyes lingering on each one before finally settling on Candyland. “I haven’t played this since I was a kid,” he said with a small, nostalgic smile.

“Candyland it is, then,” you declared, setting up the game.

As you arranged the colorful pieces and shuffled the cards, Spencer finally took a tentative sip of the wine. He grimaced at the taste, making you laugh lightly.

“Not a fan?” you teased.

“It’s... different,” he said, his face still contorted in mild discomfort. “I suppose it’s an acquired taste.”

You chuckled, appreciating the honesty. “It’ll grow on you.”

The game began, and the two of you fell into an easy rhythm, moving pieces along the candy-colored path and drawing cards. Spencer’s competitive side emerged, though it was tempered by his genuine enjoyment of the game. His laughter was contagious, filling your small apartment with a joy that had been missing for a while. He’d gone to Vegas for two weeks and you missed him dearly. Halfway through the game, Spencer took another sip of his wine, his grimace less pronounced this time. “It’s not so bad after all,” he admitted.

“See? I told you it would grow on you,” you said, feeling a sense of accomplishment.

"Did you know that wine production dates back thousands of years?" Spencer mused, his eyes lighting up with the familiar enthusiasm of a lecture. "The earliest evidence of wine-making comes from ancient Georgia, not the state, but the country. It's fascinating how..."

You listened intently, amused by his ability to effortlessly segue into detailed historical narratives. It was one of the many reasons why conversations with Spencer were always enlightening and never dull. As he continued to share tidbits about wine culture and its evolution through the ages, you found yourself appreciating not just his intellect, but the genuine passion he had for sharing knowledge. Meanwhile, you shuffled through the truth or dare cards, knowing that standard card games were indeed too straightforward for someone like Spencer. 

“Have you ever done anything illegal,” you read. You flipped the card onto the table. “Bought this game. Next.” 

Spencer furrowed his brows. “How did you illegally buy this game?” 

You looked at the stack of safe cards in your hand. “It had an over 18 rating. I wanted to have something fun for a girls night so I used a fake ID.” 

Spencer laughed. “I also had a fake ID.” 

You cocked your head, unsure of how to question it. But, some things are better left a mystery. “Pick.” 

He tentatively slid one off the top. “Dare. Take a lap around the block.” You took one look at the snowy Chicago skyline. He picked the next card. “Finish your drink.” 

The two of you shrugged, knocking back the rest of the wine in your glasses. You handed him the bottle, waiting for him to finish his pour before he put it back on the table. You refilled your glass, going for the next card. You played in an unconventional way, both attempting dares to do handstands and see who could win in arm wrestling. You both spilled your secrets during truth cards, sharing both sad and happy anecdotes. The wine was quickly depleting, fueling the playful energy in the room. This was the longest you’d talked to Spencer without it turning into an academic discussion. You flipped a card over, instantly regretting it. 

Tell your first sex story

The mood shifted. The question was too personal, too intimate to answer in the midst of this lighthearted game. You exchanged a glance with him. 

As Spencer opened his mouth, you noticed a flicker of hesitation cross his features. His expression held a mixture of thoughts—perhaps a desire to say something more, to bridge the gap that had formed between you, but also a cautious restraint, respecting the unspoken boundaries you had acknowledged.

For a moment, the room felt charged with unspoken words, the weight of their unspoken feelings and shared history hanging between you like a delicate thread. You could almost sense his struggle, the conflict playing out in the furrow of his brow and the slight tightening of his jaw. Spencer's lips parted, as if to speak, but then he closed them again, a small, rueful smile playing on his lips. He nodded slightly, his eyes conveying a silent acknowledgment of the complexities between you.

"I think this one belongs in the pile of racy cards," you said softly, setting the card aside with a small, apologetic smile.

Spencer nodded in agreement, relief evident in his eyes. "Agreed," he replied, his voice gentle. "Some questions are meant to remain private."

You gazed at him, enamored by the way he kept his hair tucked behind his ears. He pulled another card. 

Kiss the person to your left

A blush forms across his cheeks. For a moment, neither of you moved. The silence between you was palpable, filled with unspoken thoughts and uncharted territory. Spencer's gaze met yours, his eyes searching for any sign of discomfort or reluctance.

"I... uh..." Spencer stammered, his voice betraying a mix of embarrassment and intrigue. He glanced down at the card, then back at you, his expression unreadable yet tinged with something deeper.

You hesitated, your heart racing as you considered the implications of the dare. Part of you wanted to laugh it off, to return to the light-hearted banter that had defined the evening. But another part, emboldened by the wine and the lingering connection between you, wondered what might happen if you crossed that line. Before you could make a decision, Spencer took a deep breath, his resolve steadying. With a tentative smile, he leaned forward, closing the distance between you. His lips brushed softly against yours, a gentle, fleeting touch that sent a shiver down your spine.

The kiss lasted only a moment, yet it felt timeless, charged with unspoken emotions and unexplored desires. Spencer pulled back slightly, his cheeks still flushed but his eyes now filled with a mix of vulnerability and curiosity.

"I... I'm sorry," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "I... I shouldn't have..."

But before he could finish his apology, you reached out, gently placing a hand on his cheek. "No," you said softly, your voice steady yet filled with a warmth that matched the wine in your veins. "It's okay."

Spencer's gaze searched yours, seeking reassurance and understanding. In that moment, you realized that the kiss had opened a door between you, one that neither of you were quite ready to close. You moved closer. His kisses were soft and hesitant at first, a gentle exploration that soon grew bolder. He tasted faintly of the wine you had been drinking, sweet and tangy. His hands were trembling as they traced the lines of your face, then moved down to your neck, your shoulders. The nervous energy that usually surrounded him seemed to focus entirely on you, each touch sending a shiver down your spine.

That night was a beautiful mix of awkwardness and passion, a shared discovery that deepened your connection. You remembered the way his breath hitched as you explored each other’s bodies, the way his fingers tangled in your hair, the intensity in his eyes as he looked at you like you were the most important person in the world. It was a night of firsts, one you both held onto in the quiet spaces of your minds.

But soon after, Spencer was picked for the BAU. It was a dream opportunity for him, and you were genuinely happy for his success. Yet, as he immersed himself in his new role, the demands of the job took him further away. The phone calls and texts became sporadic, then faded altogether. Your friendship, once so vibrant and full of promise, began to wane under the weight of his responsibilities and the distance between you.

You finished with the final essay, putting it to the side and putting your focus back on Spencer. “How did the rest of the case go?” He’d gotten better at communicating when he was far, but you still liked to have him close. 

“We caught him. He was targeting people who were trying to make cash. He offered work for money and then would take them.” His voice came out gravelly and tired. He studied your apartment and you watched as he focused on the mantle for a minute. 

“How’s Shawn?” He asked. 

You fiddled with your bare finger. “We’ve separated. It’s been six months.” 

"I'm sorry to hear that," Spencer said softly, his gaze sympathetic as he sat across from you in your apartment. His eyes flickered with concern, his mind processing the information you had just shared.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair in a gesture of weariness. "Relationships are... complicated," he murmured, his voice tinged with a hint of regret. "I wish I could have been there for you more."

You looked at him, touched by his sincerity. "It's not your fault, Spencer," you reassured him. "You've had your own battles to fight, cases to solve. We both did."

Spencer nodded slowly, his expression thoughtful. "Still," he began, his voice quiet yet earnest, "I can't help but feel like I should have been there for you more, especially during... everything."

You smiled sadly, memories of the past few years flooding your mind. "Shawn and I... we drifted apart," you admitted, your voice tinged with a mix of resignation and acceptance. 

You spent years far too hung up on Spencer. That night you shared was something you’d never experienced before in more ways than one. You were like an addict chasing a high, but he was in a different time zone. You knew your marriage was over before it started. Shawn didn’t like that every few weeks, you'd spend an entire afternoon talking to Spencer, practically ignoring everything happening around you. Instead, you told Spencer about your job and how you’ve become a new person since divorcing. 

Spencer listened, his expression unreadable as he absorbed your words. Before he could respond, you broke the momentary silence, redirecting the conversation. "How are you, Spencer?" you asked, your voice filled with genuine concern.

He hesitated for a moment, then gave a small smile. "I'm fine," he replied automatically, his tone hinting at a deeper complexity. He started rambling about literature he’d read recently. You listened to him, feeling his excitement of having someone who could listen to him for so long. Truthfully, you could do this all day. You held his hand, instantly silencing him. “Sor-” 

“How are you, Spencer? Like… inside.” 

Spencer met your gaze, his expression vulnerable yet sincere. "I feel... a lot better now that we're close again," he confessed quietly. "I... I've thought about you for years, you know” 

You blinked. “Really?” 

He nodded, taking his hand back. Spencer would look anywhere but you. He settled on a spot in the carpet before taking a deep breath. “I mentioned you to our technical analyst.” 

“Penelope, right?” 

“Yeah.” He nervously wiped his hands on his pants. “I’d been through a lot at the time. The whole thing with my dad and…” 

You’d been away in your own world at the time, missing two phone calls because of your honeymoon. Each time, you had promised yourself to return the calls later, unaware of the weight they might carry. Meanwhile, Spencer had been grappling with his own tumultuous emotions, navigating the aftermath of a difficult period involving his father and the complexities of his own feelings for you.

“I was going to send a letter with everything but you moved. I asked her to find your new address and she told me you’d bought this place with Shawn.” 

You swallowed thickly. “I’m so sorry,” you mumbled. “I should have told you and-” 

“I respected that, Y/N. We stayed friends.” He finally looked you in the eyes. “I have been in love with you since long before that truth or dare.” 

Spencer's words hung in the air, heavy with emotion and vulnerability. You stared at him, your heart racing as memories flooded back—memories of late nights debating theories, of shared laughter over obscure references, of stolen glances that spoke volumes.

"I... I didn't know," you confessed softly, feeling a mix of disbelief and overwhelming affection. "I never imagined..."

He nodded, his gaze steady on yours now. "I never knew how to say it. I was always afraid... afraid of losing what we had if I admitted how much you meant to me. I didn't mean to spring this on you like this. It's just... I've been carrying this for so long, afraid that if I didn't say it now, I might never find the courage to say it at all."

You gently placed your hand on his, feeling the tremor beneath his touch. "Spencer, you don't need to apologize," you assured him softly. "I'm just... I'm glad you told me. I've wondered about us, too."

His eyes searched yours, a mix of relief and uncertainty flickering in their depths. "You have?"

"Yes," you admitted, your voice steady despite the storm of emotions swirling inside you. "I've thought about what could have been, what might still be... if we're both willing."

He exhaled slowly, his fingers tightening around yours. "I've always cared about you, Y/N.” 

"Thank you for being brave enough to say it," you replied, leaning in to press a gentle kiss against his cheek. "I'm here, Spencer. Whenever you're ready."

He nodded, a soft smile playing on his lips as he intertwined his fingers with yours. "I think... I'm ready now."

[another-little-hippie]

HEY! all the queers in the theater tonight!!! HELP

if you are open to sharing how rock music impacted your queer identity, please share! even a sentence or two would be appreciated. i am working on a research paper called Rock and Roll is gay, inspired by all of you guys 🥰 i am hoping to use a handful of direct quotes from my moots at the end of the paper.

if you are interested in participating:

this paper is for my own academic use and will NOT be published or shared with anyone beyond my professor and my peer review partner (who is SO in love with my work) I just need to pass a class ya’ll 😅

if you don’t want your tumblr handle to be used please make that clear.

i will use they/them pronouns in reference to the user, unless you otherwise specify.

you can share however you want! I think a long chain of reblogs would be awesome. but you are more than welcome to private message me (anonymously or otherwise) or just throw a thought in the comments.

lastly: if you want to share but do NOT want it to be used in my paper please make that clear, also 😌

thank you guys. i love and miss you like crazy and hopefully i will be back in the club during winter break. but for now im just gay little dude trying to not die in america 😀

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Unraveled 2

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: A curious man wanders into your dress shop with a lot of questions.

Characters: Sherlock Holmes (Cavill)

Note: thanks for waiting on this one.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

The carriage stops outside a brick building. A walk-up in Marleybone, just along Upper Baker Street. An address you couldn’t even dream of living near, let alone within. You peer up at the facade, the orange brick unstained by the coal and smoke of the backstreets. 

Gavin appears to open the door and sets a step down before you can emerge. He offers his hand gallantly and you let him assist you down to the road. You thank him as you peer up at the arched front door of 221b. 

“You need only knock, miss,” Gavin goes to pat the horse’s haunch as it kicks. “Ask for Mr. Holmes, he is expecting you.” 

You grip your bag tight and set your chin. You might not belong but only you are troubled by it. You climb the steps alongside the iron rail and lift the heavy knocker mounted on the thick wooden door. It’s clang rattles even you. 

You wait, both hands on the handles of the bag. Gavin appears behind you with the rolls of fabric, breathless as he struggles to keep them from touching the ground. You return your attention to the door as it opens. 

“Hello, I’m looking for Mr.--” 

“Holmes,” the very man you’re seeking stands before you, “forgive me, my housekeeper... resigned.” 

“Not to worry, sir,” you assure him. 

“Come in,” he backs up, gesturing you within with his large hand. “And how was your journey? I hope you didn’t come upon any scoundrels.” 

“Only upon her destination, sir,” Gavin japes as he steps in behind you. 

“Eh,” Holmes tilts his head at the driver, “allow me.” 

Holmes takes the rolls of fabric from Gavin. He hugs them effortlessly in on arm as he faces you again, dismissing the driver with no more than a nod. You stand rigidly by the wall, hesitant to go any further. The door closes and the click makes you flinch. 

“Allow me to show you around,” Holmes offers, looming in the tight space of the entryway. 

“I need only see your sister,” you insist. 

“Ah, yes, Enola, you will, but it only polite to get you acquainted with the space,” he rebuffs. 

“With respect, sir, I’ve come out of my way and without warning to this appointment. More work does await me at my shop,” you squeeze the leather handles until they squeak, “it is a lovely home, I’m sure, but I’ve come upon business, haven’t I?” 

“Yes, but it wouldn’t take very long,” he counters, “yet, if you’d rather keep this formal, by all means, I will take you to my sister.” 

“Thank you, sir.” 

You bite down, wondering if perhaps you were more curt than you should be. The apartment is rather far from your neighbourhood and the travel time alone will impose upon your ongoing commissions. You don’t expect he considered that. He does seem the type to command rather than ask. 

He directs you to the stairs, just across from the door, and waves you onward. He follows as your skirts brush the top of your boots with each step. The wallpaper is tightly decorated with framed newspapers and portraits, cluttered together but not garishly so. 

You get to the top and he advises you to go left. You obey as he keeps pace. 

“Did you... discover what led to that woman’s fate? Or who she was?” You ask as you take measured steps. 

He isn’t demure as he walks next to you, crowded against you as his broad figure allows for little space, “sadly, yes and no. Not her name. Only that she was a factory woman. I won’t say much on the matter as it is ongoing and confidentiality is a part of my contract, I would only gird you to keep your doors locked and yourself alert.” 

You chew on his answer. It makes you nervous. You know the woman was found close to your shop and home. The news has been whispered for blocks. 

“I will be sure to hede your advice,” you say. 

You walk past a door as he stops to knock on it. You spin back, skirts swirling around you, and he glances at you as he plants his hand on the door frame. There is activity from within, scratching and creaking. He sighs and stands straight as he slides his hand down the pillar. He raps with his knuckles again. 

“Enola,” he booms through, his voice shaking you. “I told you to be ready.” 

You hear furious footsteps and the lock flicks back with similar furor. It opens and a young woman with a slumping bun greets Mr. Holmes. Strands fall loose from the clip and her blouse is half untucked as her sleeves are rolled to her elbows. She has a long oval face, flushed as she shows her teeth. 

“I told you, I’m busy--” 

“Not so busy that you would waste this good woman’s time,” Holmes insists, “she traveled all this way. We discussed this.” 

She flutters her lashes and huffs. Her eyes flit over to you and she softens her expression, “if her time is wasted, it is hardly my fault.” 

“Hm,” he hums flatly, “isn’t it? It wasn’t I who fed your dresses to the furnace.” 

She smiles, a smug look that pinches her cheeks, “I was cold.” 

“Sister,” he warns dangerously, crossing his arms, his breadth wider than ever. 

“You know what, I welcome her company. Much preferable to your own,” the woman sneers and turns her shoulder to her brother, “come on, then. Suppose I need a dress for the banquet.” 

You inch forward. A flare of resent burns in you at the position Mr. Holmes has put you in. Plainly, this appointment was not upon his sister’s behest. She holds the door for you and her brother exhales deeply. 

“All you need do is stand still, I’m certain you can handle that, sister,” he rebukes, “do let me know when you are finished and I will call the carriage.” 

“Thank you,” you utter without looking at him. He sets the rolls just inside the door and backs up to watch you. 

You enter the bedroom and find it cluttered and cramped. There are books in stacks with more littered around the bottom. A dried-up paint palette and an easel draped over with several jackets and unpaired stockings. There is a four-post bed with scrambled covers and a canopy twisted around the poles. Vials upon vials line shelves and an inkwell stands uncapped over untidy sheets of paper. 

“Very well,” the woman shuts the door, “I am Enola, the famous detective’s ne’er do well sister and you are the seamstress who will make me a peacock.” 

You stare at her and swallow tightly. You offer your name before you begin, “I’ve only come upon his request--” 

“Ah, yes, I’m certain you have. He’s still trying to make a lady of me. I see through his guise, though he doesn’t think it. He underestimates me, see. He lies but I will go along for I will more easily avoid his snare if I do.” 

You nod and narrow your eyes. The wealthy can always afford to be so eccentric. You don’t think any woman you know would view a new dress as such a curse. She is young, she cannot know. 

“If you don’t mind, I’ll only take your measurements,” you offer, “I can always fit upon the dress form.” 

“Do what you must,” she sighs, “shall I strip down?” 

You put your bag on a chair as she unbuttons her blouse, “not-- if you--” You look up at her as she reveals a corset and reaches to undo her skirt. You focus on your bag and scoop out your measuring tape. 

You approach her as her skirt heaps at her feet. She is tall, her legs on long, her figure lithe. You begin your work silently. She raises her arms as you request and puts them back down. 

“Suppose if I wasn’t here, I might’ve become a dressmaker. I always enjoyed stitching,” she muses as you scribble down each number, “it seems lonely work. Quiet work.” 

“It’s work,” you say as you take out the envelope and unfold the page to examine the dress again. You hold it up and glance past it at Enola. 

“May I see that?” She asks but doesn’t await an answer before she snatches the paper. “Oh, is this really what he chose? No, no, no, this won’t do. I want my shoulders covered.” 

You slip the envelope back in your bag, “it is only what I was given. If you prefer adjustments, it is your dress.” 

“Yes, my dress and my body,” she crumples the paper and tosses it onto the rug. 

You close up your notebook and go to the rolls of fabric, “would it be too much for me to do some piecework?” 

“If you insist,” she pouts. 

You take out your scissors and turn your back to her. She isn’t rude, per se, but you’re not in the habit of associating with this sort of clientele. You get numbers on a sheet and you sew. A living form is not quite your forte. 

-🪡

When you finish, you can sense Enola’s agitated impatience. You don’t blame her. It’s plain she didn’t want the dress or your visit. It is more so upon the shoulders of her brother. Mr. Holmes. You’re similarly irked that he would put you in this position. 

Enola is already fiddling with some instrument before you can go. You emerge and pull the door shut after you. You stand in the hallway, bag at the crook of your elbow as you hug the fabric. You move with hampered steps towards the stairs. As the top creaks beneath your weight, your name is called from further down the hallway. 

“Ah, are you set then?” Mr. Holmes asks as he stops just outside a door, “I was thinking, to make up for your efforts, you might want to stay for tea.” 

You look down at your armful and back to him, “that’s very generous, but--” 

“I believe I paid an adequate fee for the appointment,” he strides slowly towards you, “but I am open to a barter if it was not sufficient.” 

You feel the heavy sovereign tucked into your jacket. You crook your lips and raise your chin, “no sir, it will do for today and the making of the dress. The fabric... I don’t have any as rich as the style requested.” 

“Another service I may require of you. If you wouldn’t mind to select the material, I would be happy to reimburse the expense.” 

“Would there be a colour? A fabric preferred? Velvet? Satin? Chiffon?” You prompt, “I solely work in cotton and wool, as I forewarned.” 

“Perhaps we might find a fabric seller at Covent Garden? You could accompany me on my next sojourn--” 

“I don’t know if I would have the time. I could write down some fabrics which would suit the silhouette we agreed upon,” you offer. 

“Mmm,” he hums, “you are rather professional. How about tea, then? Melinda from across the road sent some mutton over.” 

“The hour should see me back to my shop,” you shift your bag. 

“You are fastidious,” he stops before you and puts a hand on the fabric, “please, allow me, you are overburdened.” 

“I’m--” 

You can’t argue as he takes the fabric from you. You let him have it if only to avoid disaster you lean back on your heel. He angles the rolls under his arm easily and grins. A curl strays down his forehead. 

“I suppose you are right, given recent events, it would be best to see you home before the evening sets,” he says, “I would gladly see you home safe, miss.” 

He is overly polite, or perhaps you aren’t used to it. It is his home, he supplied the carriage, and he has paid generously. It makes each denial feel trite. 

“If you must, but I would be just fine on my own comportment,” you accept. 

“It isn’t any fuss, I will fetch a jacket and the driver,” he extends his arm past you, “after you.” 

You spin on your heel and face the staircase. You descend with your hand on the railing. As you come to the bottom, you wander towards the entry way and take in the fineness of the decor. Is much more becoming than your slanted rooms. 

Mr. Holmes places the rolls just beside the door and takes a jacket from the rack. He pulls it on and tells you to wait before he disappears outside. You linger as you are, sliding your bag down to your hands. 

When he returns, he reaches within to retrieve the fabric first. “Gavin is bringing up the carriage,” he declares and offers his free arm, “shall we?” 

You consider him. You wouldn’t want to be unkind. You step through the door, pulling it shut as you accept his bent arm, your hand in the crook. He accompanies you down the narrow steps, each step crowded by his. 

Gavin appears in the driver’s seat and reins the horse to a halt. The beast looks miserable. Mr. Holmes escorts you to the door and releases you to open it. He helps you with a strong hand and you sit within with your bag on your lap. He shoves the fabric in ahead of him, his head bowed as he fits through the small door. 

He closes it with a snap and settles on the bench on the other side of you. You stare across at the cotton, expecting he’d have taken that seat instead. His leg is on your skirt. 

You keep your hands on your bag. He knocks on the ceiling and the carriage rumbles into motion. You rock with it along the street, silent as you wring the leather handles. 

“I hope my sister did not cause too much stress. I know she can be a lot but she’s old enough now. She should start behaving as a lady,” he spreads a large hand across his thigh. “Perhaps, once she finds a husband, that will be easier.” 

You nod, uncertain of a proper response. 

“Not to mean... I don’t mean to assume, I am known however for my observations, and I have concluded you are not married,” he continues, “I gather if it were the case, you might not have a shop to sew in.” 

“Suppose not,” you reply dully. 

“It is only to say that my opinion of my sister isn’t general. A woman such as yourself is admirable.” 

“A spinster?” You supply. 

“I didn’t--” 

“I’ve chosen not to marry, that is true. I am not bothered by that fact,” you say, “isn’t that what you deal in, detective, facts?” 

“Fair,” he shifts on the bench, “but not everyone can detach emotion from facts.” 

“And why should I be emotional about that fact? I am much more happier than any woman could be with a husband,” you stare at the opposite wall of the carriage. “And I will assume, sir, as I am no detective, that you have neither taken to the altar.” 

He curls the fingers on his left hand, “I have not.” 

“And I’m certain you enjoy your bachelor lifestyle in your grand apartment,” you return, “while my own is not so extravagant, I find solace in it. On that, I think you might understand me.” 

He takes a breath and lets it out with a thoughtful hum, “I suppose we are similar in some way.”