#THIS IS NOT NEGATIVE. it is so good but also i think amelia for some reason can easily dig RIGHT into me

[upsidedowngrass]

teres gonna be a brief intermission between requests . so much amelia so i NEED to draw amelia too

[ravenadottir]

i started playing season 6, and i've got shit to say for the half of dozen people that are still following me in this cobweb infested blog (i apologize, i'll be explaining what's happening on a different post)

i'm only on day 2 of the season, right when it's announced that roberto is coming (which is so disappointing to me that he isn't brazilian but portuguese, like... WHEN ARE WE GETTING A GOOD BRAZILIAN CHARACTER????)

anyway, here are my thoughts:

WRITING:

i actually didn't see much of a problem with it so far. it feels on par with similar conversations we had in the past, except this time we're getting to know them a little deeper than, say, season 3.

knowing bella's family situation or roberto's is kind of refreshing because we barely learned bobby had a sister on a throwaway scene on s2, so... yeah, it's ok.

i like how they express themselves because as an litg player, i'm used to some eloquence, but as someone who sometimes watches the show i HAVE to suspend my disbelief since i know islanders from the show are just... NOT GOOD AT EXPRESSING THEMSELVES, to say the least.

i like the conversations we had so far, it felt fluid and fun, but then again i've only coupled up with jamal, because obviousoly i did, who would i go for, fucking ryan? WAKE UP.

the challenges piled up but because of how many dialogues we had in this little time i think it worked pretty well.

CHARACTERS:

grace - girl, it's been a day and ozzy is not even that hot. HAVE YOU SEEN YOURSELF? he's punching, not you. chill. (and i hate they're giving the intensity they gave hope here, feels bitterly familiar and they better fucking knock it off).

bella - FINALLY a girl i like who's available and slutty (affectionate) since the beginning. i absolutely think bella might be right there with talia when it comes to arc as an LI, but we'll see. if anyone dares stealing her or if fusebox even make the slight suggestion of a slowburn i'm burning their HQ idc

ivy - alright i see you bootleg marisol, but i don't give a shit, you're annoying, die in a hole.

amelia - i think she's putting a front and deflecting the negative attention to ivy but that's just me. also, the twist of the public choosing who she should couple up with before she could tell us is extremely dumb and unnecessary, but also a reason for her to say a different name later, maintaining her image of good sister. i don't trust her, i WILL step on her head to the finale, die in a pit you're also annoying.

jamal - i like the attention but everything with moderation gives me way more tingles than a crybaby that can't stop talking about how he wants to be with me again. we were coupled up for a few hours and only had one conversation, chill bitch. it's giving ted mosby and every himym fan knows how bad that is. i'm not sure if every guy that the public chooses to be with amelia on night 1 acts the same, but i'm slightly turned off. it's too much boy, calm down, i'm here to be a slut, calm down.

ryan - get a haircut or let it grow because looking twelve and the coolest lesbian at the same time is not the look for you. its giving hipster with a chemistry kit at the local café.. also, either you're the douchey musician or a bad poet, you can't be both, PICK A STRUGGLE.

lewie - the impersonation of being stuck in traffic. i don't care for you, die in the same hole as ivy and amelia.

ozzy - fucking pulling the noah, man. i've seen this before and i'm not interested. stop being such a coward and tell grace how you feel. i know for a fact you're gonna be drama and it's because you refuse to be honest. it's so embarrassing, bestie.

roberto - HOT. i only saw the preview but i'm excited.

PACING

it's great. i think it was kind of weird how fast and furious it was with some previous seasons (remember the last season i played was 3 and half of 4 {it was soooo tedious i gave up half way through}) but i think so far it's ok. it definitely has better cliffhangers than other times when they thought they tried their darnedest.

OBSERVATIONS WITH SCREENSHOTS:

there's no fucking way they thought these were worth diamonds. and 22 diamonds for that frufru purple shit??? it looks like something who doesn't sew would put together with a hot glue gun, stop.

ivy i might kill you like they kill one of those vampires at the end of the twilight saga, by opening your mouth so wide it cracks off your skull. SHUT - UP.

and amelia... you're irrelevant, get out.

BUDDY, YOU'RE THE MOUTHPIECE OF THE GROUP NOW, HOLY SHIT. grace has me on my knees, i can't.-

bitch, we did! i kissed you in the challenge. EXCUSE YOUR BEAUTIFUL SELF! (also, for the breasts appreciators, i feel you, boobs are great, really! but like, those... two... lines... coming out of the bikini???? yeah, that is actually what gets me. you didn't need to know but i told you anyway, because i'm happy bella is hot and cool and i don't know how to shut up when i'm love, leave me alone!) whoever designed her knew EXACTLY what they were doing.

I LOVE GRACE. I JUST DO.

i'll give ryan some cool points because 1, he burned ivy in front of everyone, and 2, he admitted and owned up to it. good for you, bestie, good luck when you take a trip to the hair salon and get rid of that... hair. also, STOP SKIPPING LEG DAY BUDDY. from the waist up it's giving "abs, hot, i go to the gym", from the waist down is giving "i'm twelve and there's a reason i go to the beach in pants".

bella and grace looking naked and glamorous but feeling threatened by this ugly ass dress is the funniest joke in the writing so far. truly. i've had mermaid costumes at 4 years of age less embarrassing than this atrocity. stop lying, bella and grace, YOU'RE BOTH NAKED AND PERFECT.

and that's what i have to say so far. i'll continue playing this season until they inevitably fuck up. i'm not being pessimistic, i'm just... well, i guess i am. but i have no reason to believe otherwise.

also, i keep forgetting ozzy is here even though it's been a day. idk why.

anyways, i'll come back with more litg brain rot in a bit.

[longbobmckenzie]

Season 6 Volume XIII Thoughts

GTFO, Amelia. That's it.

No honestly, I'm actually so curious what FB thought they were doing with her. They gave us negative responses, but did they honestly think we'd use them? Because they never have any impact. Or did they think we'd WANT to spend so much our game experience having forced chats with her and TWO DOUBLE DATES?!?! You know how they always say it's Love Island, not Friend Island? IT'S NOT SISTER ISLAND EITHER. GTFO.

The baby challenge was mostly a snoozefest. I mean, it was fine, but basic. Our partner is good with babies, Marshall isn't, Grace is disappointed with Ozzy, what else is new?

The unique chats with our LIs were so cute though - Roberto's story about his dad was ABSOLUTE ADORABLENESS and I know the other ones were cute too

Amelia's prank was dumb

Girls' day was meh. I heard there's a little Grace drama on the Ozzy route (surprise, surprise) but off his route it was just bland

I took the gem scene hoping the other girls would have some gossip to share and immediately regretted it. I did not need a play by play of Amelia's bits. Girl. Overshare, much?? It's fine to tell us you did bits, but I do not need that level of detail

No wonder she's always on us to get details 🤮

Not looking forward to next week when she tells us all about what she got into in the hideaway

Half expecting her to announce she's pregnant, ngl

I didn't take the 2nd prank during the cooking scene

Did not want a double date with Amelia and Toby. Yawn. Also why do we have to play games every damn time? This whole seasons is just a million games and challenges

Roberto on the terrace was great. Got the token hot tub date mention in there, too

I'm at least somewhat impressed that they acknowledged we've been to the hideaway already (twice) so they let someone else go, but ew why Amelia and Toby

Of course I took every opportunity to tell them or whoever else would listen that I don't think they'll las

ONE MORE VOLUME!! Looking forward to a final date with my boy where he tells me about the hot tub date one more time (actually two more - it'll defo be in his speech too) and finally win!

They better not make it a tie between us and Amelia. Ugh. Already calling it'll be down to us as the final 2 couples. WHY?! Who would vote for them??

That's it for now! Once more next week!

[nellie-elizabeth]

Grey's Anatomy: This One's for the Girls (21x04)

This one's for the girls, is it? Which girls is this one supposed to be for? This girl is not particularly gripped.

Cons:

The amount of I Don't Give A Shit I was feeling when we get to that ending and Jo and Link are having twins? Godddd I don't care! I want to go back in time and make these two never fall in love, because it's putting me to sleep! Same with Teddy and Owen talking about how they need a chance to connect because work is keeping them so busy. It's not the most insufferable angst I've ever experienced from these two, but it's still not all that interesting.

Also... I didn't mind the story about Mika's sister in and of itself, but it's a bit hard to swallow when I know we'll be saying goodbye to this character soon. Is this what sunsets her off the show? She quits her job to take care of her sick sister? I mean... that's fine, I guess, but it's just a bummer to take up screen time with a new character here when we already know we have so little time left with Yasuda.

Also, no Meredith or Amelia in this episode which is sad to me personally! I've been enjoying them so far this season. Learning that Catherine's biopsy came back negative as like an off-screen detail from Richard was kind of odd too, after all the gravitas from last week. I'm still annoyed with Richard for scolding Meredith, honestly!

Pros:

I did really like the stuff with Ben coming back to the hospital, honestly. It was interesting that he had trouble with the logistical maneuvering of the hospital systems. It wasn't that he didn't know how to do the medicine pieces, he was just tripping up with the electronic system for ordering the correct test, and stuff like that. When it came time to treat the patient in the OR, Ben was a complete bad-ass. He does know what he's doing, but there's always going to be some tension on the first day back. Blue, on the other hand, had this sort of false smug confidence about being better than Ben, but then in the end Ben extended the olive branch by asking for his help during the surgery. I liked this setup! And I liked Winston warning Bailey to back off. It made total sense for his character, after what he went through with Maggie.

While I am a little grumpy about wasting time with extra stuff when Yasuda is not long for this show, I did like seeing the other interns rally around her. And the other doctors too, everyone coming together to brainstorm a good idea for how to help preserve Chloe's chance to bear children while also giving her the best chance to fight her cancer. Very sweet to see Jules go in there and hold Chloe's hand during the procedure.

Levi and James! I love how cute this is and how well everything is clicking. I'm guessing that the reveal is going to be that James has a dead husband, not that he's a big cheating cheater. But I guess we'll have to see! I loved them being so besotted and so nerdy debating their Star Trek vs. Star Wars. Levi is 100% right, by the way, being the captain of the Enterprise is WAY better than being Han Solo. Yeesh. I also loved seeing Helm ever so briefly; I wish they'd ever known what to do with that character.

This is a bit of a shorter review, because I think this was an episode that didn't totally enrage me but also didn't have a ton that I was super excited to discuss? A lot of stuff kind of fell in the middle for me. Like the patient with the BBL, and the debate about elective surgeries and the gendered aspects of making those choices. It was fine, I wasn't mad at it, I just was sort of neutral on it. I miss Amelia, I hope she's back next week...

7/10

[ashleywool]

Hi, I saw the show on February 4th and it was so amazing!! You were so fantastic as Jessica; I related to that character a lot and even wore an outfit inspired by her/ Caroline to work the next day lol. I also really appreciated how you stayed at the stage door for so long talking to people - fully expected you to leave before you made it the whole way down the line (which I would have supported as it was very loud and very crowded/ overwhelming. I almost left twice). Anyway, I was wondering if you have any thoughts about being recognized just in daily life because of htdio. Obviously being on broadway puts you in the public eye a little bit but not to the level of a tv show or movie. Would it be weird if someone came up to you and said they loved the show, or would you be excited? (Largely asking this because I’m 95% sure I saw Amelia Fei in a coffee shop yesterday and I wanted to say something but instead I just stood there, frozen, actively listening to the songs from the show.) I might ask some other people from the cast this too so if you see they’ve replied and don’t want to answer, that’s cool. Thanks for reading my long rambling message and hope you’re feeling better after the surgery you posted about!

First of all, your username is excellent. Fact.

As to your question about how I feel about being recognized: it's a good and reasonable question in and of itself, but knowing it was asked of one autistic person to another adds all kinds of intriguing nuances. And if there's one thing I love about Tumblr (and one thing that I wish people on not-Tumblr would do more often), it's how invested people get in all the intriguing nuances. So...here goes something.

I should probably preface this by saying that I'm still in the relatively early stages of being known on this level for this thing, and I'm still working through what it all means for me in both my professional life and my personal life. In many ways it feels like I'm relearning how to be a human with a whole new set of social rules or expectations or limitations that did not exist for me before--and, in a perfect world, would not exist. On top of that, the cultural concept of "fame," and the social rules surrounding it, is evolving rapidly. So whatever I say, feel, or believe right now may not necessarily reflect where I stand a year from now.

But back to your question.

Would it be weird if someone came up to you and said they loved the show, or would you be excited?

First of all, I can guarantee with 100% certainty that absolutely no one, no matter how famous they are, will ever get tired of people saying "I love your work." You might think it's tired and cliched and doesn't really mean much to them because they've heard it before and you're just another voice in the chorus.

But the thing is--we know you're not just another voice in the chorus. You're you. The story of how you became familiar with my work, and how and why it resonated with you, is completely unique to you. Your life. Your memories. Your relationships. Your pain. Your joy. We might have drastically different upbringings, cultural backgrounds, life and work experiences, political views, religious views, whatever...and yet, something in the work I did transcended all of that and connected with you.

In a world that expects us to be constantly and aggressively polarized and divided over all sorts of things, what could possibly be more important than that?

If my very soul doesn't joyfully blaze like a bonfire of gratitude at every single voice that tells me they love my work...then what's the point of the work? What's the point of anything?

THAT BEING SAID...

Yeah, sometimes getting recognized can be a little jarring. While I luckily haven't had any outright negative experiences with being recognized (yet), anticipating the possibility of being recognized certain places has raised several etiquette considerations that I simply never had to think about before.

For instance, when I waited outside the Barrymore for two hours one frozen morning to get rush tickets for the last Thursday matinee of Harmony, a few people on that line recognized me from Ohio. They were very nice, and not at all intrusive, but I remember thinking, I hope nobody recognizes me in the audience at the actual show. I didn't want my presence to distract anyone from their experience with a show I was not working on. Especially a new musical that had opened while we were in tech, we had signed each other's opening night cards, and now we were closing within a week of each other.

My concern about being recognized in that space was not rooted in "I don't want people to talk to me," but rather in "this is their show and I don't want things to be about me right now."

I got a box seat at the matinee, which all but eliminated the possibility of people recognizing me (or even really seeing me), and even if they had, it's not like I'm, you know, a celebrity celebrity. So my concern about being recognized may have been a bit disproportionate to the situation.

But that could change one day. No matter what my humility-cum-imposter-syndrome impulses want me to think, the plausible and pragmatic reality is...that could change. So I might as well start processing all of those things now, when my presence in the public eye is at a significantly-increased-but-still-manageable level.

What sucks, though, is that I haven't been able to find or access very many mental or emotional health resources specifically tailored towards "how to process and cope with a life in the public eye." The few therapists out there specializing in those issues wouldn't take my insurance; they're overbooked with celebrity celebrities.

And that's a bummer. Fame-related mental and emotional health issues are not just relevant for wealthy A-listers, especially in the age of social media. An ordinary person who's not even looking for the attention can post one video and go viral within 24 hours--sometimes for positive reasons, sometimes for negative reasons, but either way, they are overwhelmed, because nothing in their upbringing even thought to prepare them for a situation like that. Whether you're an A-lister, an accidental viral star, or a mildly niche-famous T-list Broadway person, I don't think humans, on a neurological level, were built for fame.

Our natural trajectory of cognitive and emotional development is intended for our families and immediate communities. We are not naturally neurologically equipped to handle attention from "the masses." It's well-documented that we have a more difficult time empathizing with "the masses" than with individual people--psychology calls this the identifiable victim effect.

This effect is not rooted in cruelty or apathy--it's a well-documented neurological survival mechanism that all humans have, and all humans need in order for their empathy to function at all.

But try telling that to anybody on American social media during an election year. Everybody needs you to believe that all of the people on ~the other side~ are numb to human suffering or are refusing to take action on behalf of a group of people because their brains sometimes have to focus on other stuff.

You ever see a celebrity post an innocuous, uncontroversial Instagram picture from their regular degular life, and the comments are like, "don't you realize there's a WAR going on? how can you just SIT there, eating a BURRITO, with your CATS?" Or like, "well, it's obvious you care more about your CATS than about [insert cause/issue/group of people]." Or like, "it's been X amount of time since Y atrocity and you have said NOTHING about it. What's the matter, are you afraid to speak up for [victims of atrocity] because it'll interrupt the aesthetic of your burritos-and-cats feed? Your silence is DEAFENING."

To tie it all back to the original question: no, it's not inherently weird or bad or awkward to be recognized in my current daily life as a T-list Broadway person. So far, it has been a generally positive and harmless experience.

But I'd be lying if I said I didn't worry sometimes about my future ability to just eat a burrito with my cats without someone making an Internet about all the things they think they have the authority to tell me I should be doing instead.

[ellecdc]

Hi! spokenfolk here! Was contemplating on using my main (read: reblog) account or just sending an anon bc apparently you can't send asks on your secondary blog ?! Horrible. Preposterous. Absolutely frustrating! (Apparently, this has been a problem for years??? They should really optimize that. And can I really call it a main account when all I do on here is reblog??)

Opted for the latter because the experience of being seen is mortifying; self-cringe has still yet to perish on my end. 😭

Anyways.

CRYING. SEETHING. WRITHING LIKE A WORM! Literally jumped out of bed this morning to run to your blog the moment I got the notif and I would just like to say — Remus is such a LOSER!! (negative connotation to him, positive connotation to the quality of your writing) My heart reaches out for (Y/N) and Amelia Bones :( they both don't deserve whatever convoluted circus act Remus calls a masterplan. Really excited to see Moony's perspective on this 👀 hopefully soon?

Cheers,

— 🥞

p.s. 😭 I've realized that my blog can't be tagged because I haven't posted anything in it yet WAHAHAHA! I'll make a quick post for visibility's sake. Really sorry about that L!

Ugh spokenfolk, the mortifying ordeal of being known - I GET IT!!!!

Also, thank you for clarifying all of this for me??? I’m so new to tumblr so ppl asked to be on a tag list and I was like ???? Ok bet and I tried and it wouldn’t let me tag some people and I’m like??????????? I’m terrible at everything???? Why can’t I even just tag people in posts, the fuck???? GOOD TO KNOW!!!

Also right? Poor stupid remus I just had to take a break from writing cuz the bastard was pissing me off so much. Part of me sort of thought our reader wouldn’t be offended when she inevitably found out about this but everyone is ready for some reader angst! What do we think? Does our whimsical!reader get her feelings hurt because of our resident dumbass?

I know remus thinks/believes he’s doing the right thing, but if even SIRIUS is like “ew dude, cringe”, somethings not right.

I tried to break up the angst with Peter and James and I laughed at my own writing (embarrassing) so hopefully y’all enjoyed the comedic relief too 💖

[spookfished]

nov 2023 media roundup

hello again :3 welcome to the world from 2024!! im doing backlogs of media reviews lol. well i was really busy. and then i was super busy playing umineko!! looking back at this month, it seems like i didnt read a whole lot this month, but then i forgot that ruzhui is literally 300 chapters long. so.. a couple of these i read uh quite a few months ago by now so the review might be a bit stale. however i had like 80% of this written for several weeks so theres only a couple! this will be posted on my neocities at some point

books:

ruzhui by please dont laugh: f/f. after a terrible breakup, college yun an is happy to leave her life behind for some TIME TRAVEL! but while disguising herself as a man to avoid discrimination, she gets looped into a matrilocal marriage with businesswoman lin buxian?! intended as a fluffy palate cleanser after pdl's previous work a clear and muddy loss of love, i think it still kinda ended up getting mired in politics two thirds of the way in, when a lot of us were here for the moments with miss malewife yun an and her powerhouse wife? on the other hand, its hard to stretch out fluff for an entire 300 chapters without contriviances. i also really enjoyed how it managed to balance like. idk. 'returning to the simple emotions of the past' with 'holy shit guys the past actually sucked ass lmfao'. its a pretty relaxing read, so id recommend checking it out if youre into f/f!

the devil comes courting by courtney milan: f/m romance. can romance bloom while trying to create the first telegraphic encoding for chinese...? sooo cute im a huge fan of courtney milan as always. surprisingly goes into some pretty heavy topics including like. forced assimilation via child stealing?????? i thought it was well handled though the ldr stuff and the way amelia grows as a person was soo nice

the marquis who mustnt by courtney milan: f/m romance. the son of a conman returns home for one final trick. meanwhile, naomi just wants to take her medic class. the two become engaged on false premises and of course, catch feelings. once again extremely cute im very charmed. also liked the pottery details :3 i think in every fake engagement the whole 'pretending to themselves they dont have feelings' is a little ridiculous so i liked that they just like. acknowledged it at the outset. i think its honestly more compelling to be like 'yes my feelings are sincere and true however X still outweighs '. loove a guy shackled by duty

wandering souls by cecile pin: follows anh and her two siblings, refugees of the vietnam war. ok honestly i dont remember a lot about this book :( sorry but i did like it! its a really fast read and made me really sad so id recommend. (DISCLAIMER: AMERICAN) i also feel like i dont read a lot of non-american diaspora books so thats pretty interesting as well. nice prose also :]

detransition baby by torrey peters: a trans woman who yearns for motherhood, her detransitioned ex-boyfriend, and his pregnant partner struggle to find a way to live--together, or apart? ok sorry this is another review written in january so its kinda weighted more negatively. i had a LOT of thoughts about this in november but i forgot most of them. this novel is a deep look into a very specific kind of queer subculture--a subculture which is both very white and very annoying. sorry. the characters feel like a vivid, true-to-life depiction of the poeple i try to avoid at my little liberal arts college. however, it ALSO feels like the kind of really good gossip that you love to hear secondhand. also, the author shoehorns in discussions of race in ways that are really jarring and also, kinda bad? i honestly really loved the inner voices of all the characters which is why it sucked when i got to suddenly read a copy-pasted twitter thread about intersectional oppression instead. (especially coming from the mouth of a cis wasian woman..?) it feels all the more tokenistic since we immediately go back to the inner struggles of ames and reese instead. ugh. however, it sparked some really interesting conversations with me and my friends. i also got to learn more about ah i guess transfem detransition? as opposed to transmasc detransition. they are very different! um but i guess id recommend?

comics/manga:

surviving romance: action/horror webtoon?? the woman living in the body of a romance novel character is determined to get her picture-perfect happy ever after-- at all costs. everything goes according to plan until the day zombies attack the school. chaerin is forced to bond with the faceless extras of her story, and find out what is rotting at the core of *love every day*. very solid writing!! i like how the author gradually introduces characters, and how the tension ratchets up as more people to care for becomes more people that can be lost. definitely goes into some orv-lite type themes, which i appreciated. i guess my only complaint is that despite the solid execution it didnt really ~wow~ me in any way... still worth checking out though :3

run away with me girl by battan: f/f romanceish? two high school lovers meet again after midori decided that their relationship was just a childish whim. but even though midori has decided shes straight (and is married with a kid on the way!), maki still has feelings for her. dude soooo cute the art style is not personally my thing but i felt like all of the characters were really grounded and the introspective parts were really interesting. some beautifully atmospheric parts! would recommend :3 witch hat atelier kitchen (reread) by shirahama kamome: a spinoff of witch hat atelier, where the two teachers qifrey and olrugio make food together after hours! gorgeous art as always, and some cute recipes too! i reread this since an official english translation came out lol. monotone blue: short furry m/m about apathetic, aloof cat hachi, who meets aoi--a shy transfer student who happens to be the only lizard in the whole school. pretty lighthearted for the most part, but also heavily implied a sexual assault scene?? or at least the vibes?? in a way that treated it far too lightly and left a bad taste in my mouth. possibly worth reading for the art, but idk :/ definitely falls into the romance trap of having a love interest go "ill save you from these bad guys!" for like a cheap plot device and then not really going into it

movies/tv:

parasite: class-focused comedic thriller? the kim family finds a way out of choking poverty by working for the extremely affluent park family. its almost too easy--until it isnt. man everyone says parasite is so good. AND IT IS!!! i cant believe i took so long to see this movie i got to see it with some friends over thanksgiving break and it was so good :] had me stressed for my fucking life sitting at the edge of my seat. has a lot of meat to bite into analysis-wise but is also just so crushing in many ways.. the ending stuck in my head for a long time. rewatching it this january was honestly more stressful in some ways haha

revolutionary girl utena: allegory-heavy commentary on shoujo and princess narratives and the nature of heroism and-- f/f. utena is a girl who aspires to be just like the prince of her dreams. she is somehow wrapped up into an engagement with anthy himemiya, who calls herself "the rose bride." ahhhh i still havent watched the last two episodes actually. people always say "utena is a fantastic show but PLEASE mind every single trigger warning" and its true! utena tackles some really heavy subjects in a way that is delicate, understated, and vicious. i watched a bunch of these episodes late at night in the computer lab and they honestly left me breathless. has so many layers of symbolism to dig through that it can honestly be overwhelming, but also very compelling just on the surface! watch utena. also watch this amv https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THN3gYKYojs

the wonderful story of henry sugar: a netflix adaptation of one of roald dahls stories (within a story). it was cute :3 not a lot of sticking power lol but i think this is the first wes anderson production ive ever watched. very visually distinctive!

video games:

lethal company: cooperative horror game about trying to collect garbage in a dystopically capitalist world ft. proximity chat! dude this game is blowing tf up i tried playing it with neil but 1. we are huge pussies 2. its really only feasible with 3+ people

music:

TILT by nanoray: anime breakcore is one of my truly guilty pleasures. i see the anime girl on the cover and cringe a little bit HOWEVER nanoray is a really good artist. the intro is so liquid... i think the album as a whole really just sweeps you up into a groove. some of my favorite tracks are into and DOGWALK2000 THE LONELIEST TIME by carly rae jepsen: i was so mean to carly rae jepsen in middle school. im so sorry miss jepsen i was just so tired of hearing call me maybe everywhere. im now a changed man. just a really well constructed pop album 👍admittedly not as iconic to me as emotion, but joshua tree and talking to yourself are my favorites atm SAYONARA WILD HEARTS OST: ive never played sayonara wildheart, but i think its a rhythm game about girls fighting each other on motorcycles? with bisexual lighting and tarot cards? but anyways this is a synth-y lush pop album thats super fun! it feels like it tells a story (probably bc it does) and it always makes me want to listen all the way through :3 my favorites are sayonara wild heart and their clair de lune remix

anyways if you read to the end, thanks as always! its really interesting to try and condense my thoughts about something into one paragraph.. sometimes its easier than others huh! im almost done with the december one so please look forward to that 👍

[englishstrawbie]

Okay, take three (and counting?! lol). BUT... as you apparently have quite some Marina already, I feel the need to switch. For your sake, of course ;)

You had me writing about Amelia and Carina recently, which - I admit - could work. Yet way before that, or even knowing about Amelia's queerness, I could actually picture Amelia with... Arizona (whether back at Johns Hopkins or in Seattle)! Soooo if you see what I mean, how about this one: "let's be alone together" ?!

Arizona sits at the bar nursing a glass of white wine, resisting the urge to drink it in just a few gulps. It is busy and she has to keep sending away the men and women who think she is there for a fun time, not in the mood for company tonight. She has come to a bar a few blocks away from the hospital on purpose, so that she doesn’t bump into anyone from work. They will want to talk about what happened and that is the last thing Arizona wants.

It was the worst day of her residency so far. A bus full of fourth graders were on their way to the aquarium when their driver suffered a fatal heart attack, veering off the freeway and down a bank, flipping onto its side and skidding along the ground until it had come to a halt when it hit a bridge. The number of casualties had been extreme and Johns Hopkins had been overrun with victims.

Arizona had been in the thick of it – not only as a resident, but as Chief Resident she was responsible for making sure that the rest of the residents were okay too. She hadn’t stopped moving all day and her body was feeling it, every muscle aching. She probably should have just gone home, run a bath and soaked her weary limbs, but as much as she wasn’t in the mood for company, she also didn’t want to be alone. She needed to be somewhere noisy to drown out her thoughts; so that she doesn’t remember the number of children she had watched die today, so that the tiny coffins she keeps seeing don’t haunt her in her dreams later on.

Last week, she had submitted her application for a Peds fellowship. Doctor McCale had pretty much told her that her spot on the programme was guaranteed; but now, after comforting all those parents dealing with their loss and grief, she doesn’t know if she can do it. She knows she will be damn good at the surgery, but her head is filled with so many doubts about whether she is strong enough for the difficult cases that don’t have a happy ending.

With a heavy sigh, she takes another sip of her wine, enjoying the way it relaxes her body and expels the negative thoughts from her mind.

“Vodka, neat please.”

A familiar voice captures her attention and Arizona turns her head to see a familiar face at the bar. A first year resident – Alison? Annabel? No, Amelia. She is new to the programme and their paths haven’t crossed much yet, but she seems like the quiet, studious type.

Arizona watches as the woman behind the bar places a tumbler in front of her. Amelia wraps her hand around the glass and swirls the clear liquid, watching it coat the ice cubes. She doesn’t drink it, just stares at it. It’s… weird, Arizona thinks, and her curiosity is piqued.

As if she knows she is being watched, Amelia looks down the bar, straight at Arizona, who blushes at being caught. She raises her hand awkwardly as they acknowledge each other, and Arizona wonders what to do next. She really isn’t in the mood to be someone’s sounding board, but she is Chief Resident and, if Amelia is struggling, it is just as much her problem.

Arizona picks up her wine glass and walks along the bar, but doesn’t sit. She doesn’t plan on getting into a deep conversation with her, just wants to know she is okay.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

Silence falls between them as Arizona clears her throat.

“I know it’s a dumb question after the day we had but – are you okay?”

Amelia lets out a small, sad laugh. “No. Are you?”

“No,” Arizona says. She feels compelled to offer some words of comfort, even if they don’t mean much. “It’s not usually that bad, you know. Today was…”

“Fucking shit?”

Arizona smiles. “Yeah. Really fucking shit.”

Amelia lets go of her glass and straightens her shoulders.

“Look, I know how to deal with shitty days. I’ve had plenty of them in my life. I appreciate you trying to make me feel better, but you don’t need to.”

Arizona raises her eyebrows at how aloof she is, a little offended but also a little impressed.

“Okay,” she says. “Just…” She looks at the glass of vodka on the bar, watered down now by the melting ice. “…don’t drown your feelings too deeply. We gotta do it all again tomorrow. Rounds start at eight.”

She turns and is surprised when she feels a hand on her arm. She looks down at the firm grip that Amelia has on her wrist, then over to the young woman.

“You wanna get out of here?”

That is unexpected.

“I came here to be alone,” Arizona says.

“Me too,” Amelia says with a shrug. “Let’s be alone together.”

Arizona hesitates. As tempting as it would be to lose herself in another woman’s arms right now, she knows it isn’t a good idea to hook up with a resident under her charge. But it only takes a beat for her to swallow the last of her wine and grab Amelia’s hand, dragging her out of the bar. Before she knows it, Amelia has her pressed up against her car. Her lips taste of coffee and her hands are warm against Arizona’s skin as they slide underneath her top and explore her body. Amelia pushes her hips forwards, both of them groaning into their kiss as pleasure courses through them.

“My apartment is only a few blocks away,” Arizona says in between kisses. “You wanna…”

Amelia doesn’t wait for her to finish her question.

“Yes.”

Romantic moment prompts

This was a fun prompt to fill, thank you @popchoc!

[bi-lullaby]

I loved jolex but am starting to ship jolink too and am hoping you can write another one of your expert metas on why jolink could be a great couple, how they’re similar in ways that matter but different enough to balance each other out!

I think the thing about Jo and Link possibly working out well is that neither of them needs the other in any way? They could be beneficial and good (yes almost synonyms but not quite) to have as romantic partners in each of their lives but it isn’t something that’s lacking in either of them.

They have a nice shared story, seem to admire each other greatly, they’ve been great at becoming support systems for each other and adore each other’s kids, they seem to hold similar things close to heart and they value each other a lot, all good signs for a relationship. Jo’s much more no-nonsense than him so that would be a nice balance, and I feel like the whole “dark and light” dynamic would still apply in some ways although I feel like it’d be more in Link’s benefit because Jo, while deeply traumatized and shaped by her trauma, has a handle on it in a different way than, say, Amelia did and would appreciate his sunshine-ness without necessarily having to incorporate it into her life? While he could learn with her the whole “I have zero complaints bc the mere idea of negativity brings me down so much that I refuse to engage with any of it at all” isn’t maintainable or necessary for him to still be okay.

And I know this is somewhat subjective but they have such great chemistry imo? Like Link showed up out of the blue and I could immediately believe like “yes this is her best friend they clearly like each other so much” and there’s absolutely space for that to remain platonic but it could also become romantic besides their brief fwb stint and would be a good addition to both of their lives.

[asirensrage]

Writing Questions Tag Game

I was tagged by @residentdormouse! Thanks for that!

What is your absolute all-time favourite idea you’ve ever had?

Hmmm. All of my ideas are my favourite lol. This is hard to answer. I have no idea. I enjoy throwing people into new situations and exploring how they're going to react.

Is there a question you’ve been asked in the past that really stands out to you and you still think about sometimes?

...no? I still think about this one negative review I got which was fairly justified because I hadn't updated the warnings and probably assumed it was obvious the relationship was toxic. I updated the tags, gave new warnings and learned from it so...

What is your favourite part of being a writer? What parts could you take or leave?

My fave part? Creating! Coming up with new ideas and exploring different situations and sharing those ideas and scenes with people. I like getting reactions from people. What parts could I leave? Writer's block, my lack of focus, and having too many ideas that I can't keep track, lol.

What is your greatest motivation to write/create?

I don't know. There's never been a time when I haven't wanted to create. I like sharing my ideas and characters with people and interacting with them based on it. I don't think I could ever stop writing or creating. Oh! Also spite. I excel at being motivated by spite.

What do you wish you knew when you were first starting out writing?

That the most important thing was enjoying what you write and that I will improve. No matter what I think, as long as I keep writing, I will improve.

What is your favourite story you’ve written TO COMPLETION? Link it if you’d like and can!

Nooo, don't make me choose! I love all my fics for various reasons. Um, maybe The Art of Seclusion (Ff.net and Ao3) for the simple fact that a) I've gotten some fantastic reactions from people and even though it took me years, my readers stayed with it to the end and b) I met some incredible people through it, including @vixenofcourse.

What is your favourite out-of-the-box quote?

Right now? “I fear that if she should accept, the flame of her heart would be drowned by the weight of your desire." and "She’s been cursed in a variety of ways since her childhood. She’s not going to hold merit to the angry words of something that’s dying. It’s the curses of the living that one needs to be careful of."

Which of your characters would you say has the most controversial mindset? Why do you say so and how do you personally feel about their ideals?

Uhhh...Amelia and her selfishness? Grace and her manipulation and murder? Darcy and her willing to crash someone's car with them in it?

I think all of these women do what they feel they need to, whether for survival, entertainment or an act of karma. Not everyone has the same motivation or mindset and that's fine. It's what makes people interesting, even if they're not good.

If you, when you first started writing, met you now, what would younger you think?

Probably be astounded at how good my writing is now in comparison and how well adjusted I seem 😂 (also at how many people like our writing! That still surprises me!)

soft tagging: @chickensarentcheap @ninjasawakenedmystar @nadja-antipaxos @nejires-hado @kingsmakers @chrissymunson @damn-daemon @darsynia @darth-caillic and anyone else who wants to join

[plotandburn]

Harry Potter Gets Adopted By ....

ok so, before anything starts let's get to the rules:

No reader-inserts, self-inserts or unhappy endings are allowed.

spanking, watersports, extremely underage ships or parent/child incest are only allowed if portrayed on a negative light.

Peter Petigrew and Dolores Umbridge must be bashed

Dumbledore must be gay and atracted to Grindewalt and Grindewalt alone.

poor grammar is not allowed (you don't need a beta but at least use grammarly some form of grammar corrector)

You are not allowed to bash Severus Snape, Sirius Black,Draco Malfoy or Remus Lupin

Hagrid can only be paired with Madame Maxine and no one else

8. Mad Eye Moody and Amelia Bones can't be paired with anyone

9. Minerva Mcgonagal can only be paired with Poppy Pomfrey or anyone on the staff that she never taugh herself.

10. Crabbe and Goyle can only be paired with Daphne Greengrass, Astoria Greengrass, Milicent Bulstrode, Susan Bones, Hannah Abbot, each other or an Oc.

Now,just to clarify, Harry won't be adoted by all the mean girls at the same time ofc. You get to choose. Here's how i envision him turning out if adopted by each of them:

Harry James Heron Samuels (Adopted son of Cady and Aaron):

+Crazy good at math. As expected since Cady is his mom.

+Like Cady, he loves animals and nature so he ends up being as found of magical creatures as Charlie, Newt or Hagrid.

+Also compares high school to a jungle.

+Highly observer/this nigga is in no way in hell oblivious like his canon self.

+Loves Pranks.

+I'd imagine he is a major bookworm, specially since canon Harry most likely would be if it weren't for the Dursley's

+Gryffindor through and through.

+ Takes Care and Artimancy.

+Goes on to work with magical cratures.

+Has a major vengefull streak.

+recomended ships: Harmony, Huna , Notter and Charry (is this the oficial name for the Harry/Charlie Weasley ship? )

Harry George Oman (Adopted son of Regina and Shane ):

+A major Jock, who like his mom, uses sports as a way of relieving stress.

+Can be hella intimidating but would never bully someone since his mom learned from her past mistakes and taught him better than that.

+ Also Has a major vengefull streak.

+Also highly observer/this nigga is in no way in hell oblivious like his canon self.

+ an extremely good liar and manipulator.

+Extremely confortable in the leadership role.

+Slytherin through and through.

+takes care and runes.

+ grows up to become a professional quidditch player.

+Recomended ships: Drary, Blarry, Hinny, Haphne, Hansy, Hastoria.

Harry Wieners (Song of Gretchen and...someone):

+Major gossiper. his mom is Gretchen afterall.

+ also Highly observer/this nigga is in no way in hell oblivious like his canon self.

+also an extremely good liar and manipulator.

+Fluent in Vietnamese thanks to his mom.

+ Takes Ancient Runes as one of his electives.

+ Grows up to become a jornalist ( something his canon self would probably never do but it's dowright perfect for him)

+Slytherin through and through.

+Recomended ships: same as Harry George Oman but with the inclusion of Harvati and whatever the name of Harry/Lavander Brown ship is.

Harry James Smith ( Adopted son of Karen Smith and someone....Her cousin Seth? idk you get to choose):

+Extremely Responsable.

+Does the taxes for his mom, since i'd rekon she wouldn't know how.

+Major Mother Hen.

+ Friends with everyone

+As oblivious as his canon self, not due to being unobservant but to often being to distracted thinking about other things.

+Either a Puff or a Raven. Not Slytherin or Gryffindor though.

+Takes care and Artimancy.

+Grows up to become a teacher or a healer.

+Will cut ties with anyone that calls his mom stupid or anything or the sort.

+Recomended ships: Harmony,Huna,Hinny, Hedric.

You can also make Harry be adpted by two plastics at once, in wich case the traits will be combined.

++++++++++Bonus:

Harry James Ian ( Adopted son of Janis Ian and Kevin):

+Major Goth

+ Also Crazy good at math.

+Good at making plans that actually work.

+Loves pranks.

+Hates bullying but has a bit of a mean streak.

+ Also Takes Artimancy.

++ also Highly observer/this nigga is in no way in hell oblivious like his canon self.

+Goes on to do something in the ministry(you get to choose)

+Gryffindor through and through.

+Recomended ships: Hinny,Huna, Hedric.

Harry Cocco ( Glenn Cocco and Someone):

+Glenn Cocco is a blank slot so in this case the sky is the limit.

[upsidedowngrass]

(The “post charlotte now” anon) THANK YOU that is exactly how I interpreted her character! I’m so happy someone else sees her in the same light as me, it’s kinda tiring seeing the negativity towards her (understandable tbh since she barely ever showed a positive attitude and only towards the end) since what she struggles with is an actual real life issue that usually is a result of trauma, it’s the worst mindset to ever be in and it leaves you and everyone who cares about you hurt, if not leaves you completely alone because you keep pushing everyone away thinking nobody’s ever genuine with you and there’s some nasty ulterior motives for their “kind” actions, it sucks and in a way i’m glad she somewhat snapped out of it after dying and being in the waiting room, obviously that world view wouldn’t disappear into thin air but i feel like she’s gonna be a bit more mindful now,i noticed her being a bit less hostile too and i was wondering how people didn’t notice that or at least don’t care to talk about it?, also you’re so right about charlotte being included with Amelia and bryce if they ever moved in together i feel like she’d at least stay in touch w them, arguably to me charlotte is one of the best written one characters if you really look into her

I also remembered people saying she’s an awful person because she’s painting her friends as these bad people like guys….she genuinely thinks they pity her and only care about their own image obviously she’s gonna tell other people the same thing, and her lying about not knowing there was fungus in the caves honestly also seemed like her not wanting to admit she’s wrong to not worsen her already very fragile self image, i feel like she doesn’t like being confronted about her mistakes because it just sucks being confronted about something you struggle to overcome (recklessness, awful spending habits, distrust of others that comes off as “having an ego”, etc) it even might come off as preachy, so overall i love charlotte’s character and how complex she is, i hope more people see your post i’m tired of her being painted as a manipulative asshole she just seems like she’s gone through some stuff that made her that way like no way you distrust everyone for no serious reason

YAA charlotte is like... a loooottt of how she acts really feels like its deeply rooted in Smth, and while its never specified what it is (or if there IS smth its based in, but it really does read like it is) and ultimately, the specific WHAT isnt really relevant, and it doesnt excuse her actions!! but shes def not like. evil or anything? people arent as patient w her character as they are for others who do similarly shitty things in the series and its genuinely a little like. shes not Bad Forever And Always. shes improving by the end of the series, at least somewhat, and shes not gonna be PERFECT right off the bat, and issues w trust arent easy to get rid of, if you can be rid of them entirely, but i think having the actions of her friends be recontextualized as not malicious like. genuinely has helped w her character growth, and she CAN improve and IS improving

also?? the thing abt her lying . sooooo tru. i think that her lying abt not knowing abt the fungus can really easily be read as her Deliberately trying to manipulate ppl abt her experiences, and while i DO think she does explain things in ways that make her look better (like u said, very likely to save image . bc she ALREADY has expressed that she doesnt like being belittled) its not malicious. that doesnt make it GOOD, but ppl painting all of her actions as Bad and Evil isnt doing her character any justice. shes a SUPER complex character, and i think she unfortunately gets overlooked bc she isnt Obviously part of liam amelia and bryces 'group.' she IMMEDIATELY was ok with the competition and so she doesnt get as involved in the main plot of trying to leave the plane. but i think shes a bit like julien in that, she doesnt ACTIVELY alter the plot in any super significant way, but she IS important narratively, i think. she shows someone similar to taylor, who WANTED to participate, but also someone who DOES ignore the worst parts of whats going on. shes a LOT like airy, easily adaptable, prone to isolation, and not always good at reading the wants or needs of others. but charlotte (and ive seen this mentioned before somewhere?) shows, at the end of the series, the Best case scenario for airy (were he not stuck in his world)

ANWYAY this is a lot but like. man charlotte is SUCH an amazing character. charlotte i am SO sorry everyone overlooks your awesome writing

[ashtraythief]

I love when you talk about Sam and Dean! Your thoughts on them are so interesting, and you really get the characters. I haven’t watched the season post 11 because I couldn’t take all the manufactured drama between the two boys, so I’m guessing I need to pick it up? You talking about them being settled and domestic and choosing each other over and over again is SO sweet. I’ve always been curious to see how their dynamic would change in later seasons, but I was worried there would be more manufactured drama. Like the writers kept making them fight and it felt so forced (can’t even think of what season I’m talking about right now..). Does that stop? Do you even know what I’m talking about? I can’t take the manufactured drama to make a more interesting show, I just want those babies to be happy and loving and catch bad guys together

Oh, thank you nonnie! That’s so kind of you to say <3 I know I'm not usually part of the tumblr meta crowd, so this makes me go all mushy inside ;)

Yeah, I think I know what you mean. Seasons 6-11 have their good stuff, but the soulless split, the Amy thing, the Gadreel thing, the Amelia thing, the darkness thing, the MoC thing, there’s just lots of drama and conflict. That definitely dies down later. Which I guess makes things better, but I am personally not a big fan of the later seasons, despite brother domesticity. (For reference, I love seasons one to five, I do enjoy six and seven, I find the Amelia thing atrocious, but I like the back half of season eight. Nine and ten are ups and down and mostly wasted potential. Eleven is both better and worse. I think it has many good motw and some outstanding brother eps like Red Meat and Safe House, but I absolutely loathe that they brought Lucifer back for many reasons and I’m not a fan of how they did the Darkness. Season twelve could have been good, but too many things rubbed me the wrong way. I really dislike thirteen and fourteen. Fifteen is probably the worst, Carry On excluded, even though I think is isn’t a good episode as a whole, it just has outstanding scenes.) For your question of whether you should pick it up: there are people who enjoy the later seasons for precisely the brother harmony reasons. I’m not one of them. For me the bad outweighs the good and I only rewatch very few episodes. I’ll put the rest under the cut because it’s basically late season negativity though I will try to point out things that I think worked.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the domestic moments, I love SamandDean being a unit and together and killing bad guys, but the bad myth arcs, the inconsistent characters, the endless angel mess, the endless regurgitation of Lucifer and the frankly lazy writing and incompetent show running make most of it unwatchable for me. Initially, I quit the show halfway through season 12, because a lot of the motw eps were just not great (a lot of the lazy writing included dumbing down Sam and Dean for danger and peril, when you know they’ll survive anyway and you know they’re competent hunters, but the writers weren’t smart enough to pull off good suspenseful plots most of the time), and I found the return of Mary both utterly unnecessary and I also didn’t think her character was written well. I have very petty reasons for disliking some elements of the Men of Letters strongly, so yeah. And then I was staying with a friend when the wire fight finale aired and that sealed the deal for me for a while lol.

Eventually, when they announced the last season, I went back and forced myself through an entire rewatch and it was painful. I really don’t care at all about 13 and 14. I stopped giving any fucks about the angels after season 7 tbh. I really liked Cas and to some degree the angels until season 7, after that Cas’s characterization and powers were inconsistent and all over the place and no other angel stuck around long enough that you’d care about them and their power struggle (Hannah being the only exception). I know they needed to give J2 more time off and needed to give other characters more screen time, but that wasn’t it. I also didn’t care about the apocalypse hunters and the whole AU Michael thing. Never mind Lucifer. The addition of Jack could have been really good (though why they had to cast another white boy at that point in the show really is beyond me. No shade on Alex C, I think he did a decent job for the character and was downright delightful when possessed by a demon, but like, my dudes, at least try with the diversity when it comes to your most recurring regulars), and they actually could have used his struggle with his identity and his parentage and his relationship with Cas as a counterweight to Sam and Dean and give J2 time off. Instead the writers couldn’t decide whether Jack should be Cas or Sam and Dean’s foster son, and developed neither of these relationships as fully as they could have. There were great moments with all three of them and Jack, how their own history made them related to or raise the boy, but they couldn’t do it all in the time they had, so a more focused storytelling with Cas and Jack would have done wonders I think both for Cas as a character and a compelling side-plot to Sam and Dean’s adventures when J2 needed time off. Rowena and Charlie are bright spots in the later seasons, but Charlie was criminally killed off and Rowena could have gotten a little more screen time I think. 

What I like about the brothers and their conflict is that they both back each other’s plays, but also listen to each other. Their reunion after Dean’s Michael possession is beautiful, there are lovely brother bond moments (we see Poughkeepsie in action!), and there’s heart wrenching grief when Dean thinks Sam has died. Good stuff, really. There are occasionally decent motw eps, but overall to me 13 and 14 were a real chore, mostly because of the AU hunters I couldn’t really care about, but the show also didn’t make a good effort to make us care about them, and the whole Michael thing was just… like, Jensen tried, and later did a decent job, but also like…. why? Why the endless angel parade? There are good brother moments due to the whole Michael possession and there’s a mideason arc that has good moments and works, but again, I think there were better choices to move the plot forward than to recycle the angel idea over and over again. And of course Lucifer and Chuck and just… no. BuckLemming’s hard on for Mark P became increasingly unbearable and the return of Gabriel and the whole Princes of hell was also… idk. Cheap. Uninspired. Crowley’s reform of hell into a bureaucratic hellscape in season 6 was great, later on it became a boring corporate demon in suits kind of thing that lacked any kind of horror factor. I never was in the show for the horror aspect, but they watered down the concepts so much, took away any previous stakes and consequences that it all felt meaningless and inconsequential. Hell used to be scary. Going to hell used to be scary and this huge thing. Breaking out of hell used to be a huge thing that needed devil’s gates or heavenly armies. And later it’s just medieval-esque dungeons with stunt demons fifty to fifty-six standing around and everyone coming and going as they please. Hell turned into a joke, honestly and since it was seen so often in the later seasons it really grated on me.

Season 15 is an absolute dumpster fire with only very few good moments. Cannot recommend. Like they had one job of wrapping up the show, instead they managed to put out some of the most cringey visuals (ghosts running in daylight. Ghosts. Running. In Daylight. Running! In daylight!), ruin OG evil guys (see season one ghosts running in daylight), ruin canon in staggering uncaring ways, bring back other old characters with no real impact, have “fun episodes” that aren’t really funny. There are fun moments, like the fancy!chesters, and of course the three different AU glimpses with Samifer, BoyKing!Sam and demon!Dean, but you can just watch those snippets on youtube. And then they wrap up the big bad of the last few seasons without Sam and Dean actually doing much to contribute to that and only manage to go out on a high because covid impacted the filming of the last ep and Dabb’s kind of mediocre and weirdly paced script with an unfinished case that leaves more questions than closure is only saved by Jared and Jensen putting everything they had into the barn scene, the montages and the bridge scene, which are absolute shining beacons of two actors caring about their characters and saving the legacy of a show in the process. Like, no matter what happened post spn, they gave their all for Carry On, put so much thought in the dialogue, the costumes and the accessories, and they made it their own in a way that made it work. And I will be forever grateful for that.

I would apologize for this dump of negativity, but you asked 😅

So, I guess, if you want, you can do a selective rewatch and get the highlights and avoid the pitfalls? It’s what I do nowadays when I rewatch. I watch 1-5 mostly completely, and then every season, the number of eps I watch decreases. So I personally cannot recommend watching it all even though I know opinions differ wildly and you might miss out on cute brother moments if you skip some of the worse eps. I guess the development of the domesticity, of the security in each other is also something you miss out on if you only rewatch electively. So I guess if you can stomach the rest of it, it might be worth it. There are some people here on tumblr who draw out excellent meta of the later seasons and write excellent fic about it. I can’t remember specifics, but zmediaoutlet has really good thoughts on late season Sam and Dean. So if you want the brothers, try it, I think you’ll realize quickly if you can stomach the quality of the eps. Hope that helps 💜

[wedriftlikelonelyplanets]

Fic Writer Interview 💕

tagged by @1425fivefive, @formulaoceanthank, and @formula-fun PLEASE KNOW i love you all DEARLY.

SORRY THIS TOOK ME AN ACTUAL ETERNITY TO POST??? I DIDN"T REALIZE I"D SAVED IT AS A DRAFT INSTEAD OF PUBLISHING IT?!?!?

How many works do you have on AO3?

Tragically, only 4

What's your total AO3 word count?

28,112 - I've only started publishing fic this year do not even come for me *sob emoji*

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Telling Me I Gotta Behave Now (362)

We Can Do This Shit Forever if it's Lust, Yeah (176)

What's a God to a Non-Believer (156)

I'm so Lonely and You're the Only One Who Knows Me (113)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Sometimes, yes. I'm still not used to like...people reading or perceiving my work so it can be like...weird and wild and uncomfortable for me to reply to comments because I'm hiding my face behind my hands being like "oh my god you liked my writing?!?!"

I'm working on replying to comments more, but I have the attention span of a gnat and sometimes I forget I even have fics out on the internet. Also once again, being perceived is IN FACT terrible.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

What's a God to a Non-Believer probably? It's not like super angsty but it definitely ends with Charles feeling some type of way (negative), with an implication that Oscar and Lando are going to get in a bit of an argument at the end.

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

I'm So Lonely, probably. It's not done yet, but it's just Lando and Oscar being incredibly sweet with each other, and trying to figure their shit out. I do have ACTUAL fics that will have like established happy endings as well.

Do you write crossovers?

No, but I do write AU's

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Nope. People have definitely like...misunderstood parts of what I've written, but never any hate.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes I do write smut, despite the fact that sometimes writing smut is like having my fingernails pulled out because GOOD LORD it's a lot of effort sometimes.

As for what kind of smut I write? Idk I kinda have really only written a lot of relatively rancid smut because like...why not. There's just something to be said for being the worst of yourself and also the best of yourself and figuring all of that out with someone. It's very clear if you read anything of mine that I do love fucking around with power dynamics a bit (a lot), and i absolutely have a freak4freak agenda.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

My friend and I are co-writing a novel (kind of....I don't write anything ever)

What's your all-time favorite ship?

AMELIA why do we have one of the same favourite all-time ships. Veronica and Logan are like...yeah.

But also Ronan/Adam/Kavinsky from The Raven Cycle, or Ronan/Gansey from The Raven Cycle in the past as well.

Now it's probably Lestappen and Landoscar as far as F1 RPF goes

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

UHHHHHHH unfortunately probably the Charlos Divorce Fic mainly because I cannot currently stand to look at Carlos' face right now. Also possibly my weird non-traditional a/b/o Charlos fic again for both similar reasons, and because it came together in a stroke of insanity and I haven't had inspiration since I had to go through the race calendar for the duration of time that they've been teammates to try and figure some stuff out.

What are your writing strengths?

Writing yearning and longing, I think. I find something so incredibly satisfying in writing this like aching longing for someone or something that you might not be able to have, or you can't have for a while. Addressing all those internal feelings that ache deep down.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue. LORD HELP ME sometimes I feel like I don't know how to write a single sentence of dialogue because like...how do people talk to each other?

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I don't really speak any other languages aside from INCREDIBLY basic Canadian french, so I generally try to keep it to like....nicknames or simple phrases so I don't like...embarrass myself.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

F1 RPF? There might be something shoved somewhere far back in the recesses of fanfiction.net about The Mortal Instruments but like.....I wrote one chapter of a fic and never revisited it.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

UHHHHHHH none?

If I went back and re-read the entirety of The Raven Cycle again, I'd probably consider writing something in that universe, but that's a lot of effort.

If I went with ships, I mean...I can't really say I haven't written for certain ships, I just haven't published anything with those ships yet, because I've been struggling with not being able to finish things disease.

What's your favorite fic you've written?

HONESTLY.....I was reading "We Can do This Shit Forever if it's Lust, Yeah" yesterday and like....it's PROBABLY the best piece of writing I have published right now. I do love the threesome fic...IN fact I love the threesome fic dearly but I have trouble looking it in the eye.

Low pressure tagging: @carbonmono,@thelettersfromnoone, @verstappentime, and anyone else who wants to participate. There are some people i'd love to tag but also IT MAKES ME ANXIOUS.

[hero-dwelling]

But yeah, in the end it is weird Hori focused souch on the "society" part in his story, when he didnt want to show any real change and keep the status qou.

Especially when he could just have it be a personal story of Izukus individual struggles (and a few of his classmates too) and then there wouldnt be this whiplash when there is no big change in how it all works at the end, just a feel good story of a kid archieving his dream

Not even saying I would find that really compelling just that it would atleast work, not like what we got.

But I think the real culprit of it all where some behind the scenes reasons that are hard to gauge - like was it the editors, was it the negative reaction of japanese fans to many events that demotivated Hori, was it his health and general fatigue that made him apathetic? We'll never know - well atleast if nobody spills the tea

The manga had a hard enough time focusing on the school part. I appreciate criticism that the manga would have become boring if each year repeated the same events--school orientation, sports festival, exams, school festival, graduation--and just add more and more characters that the story then can’t focus on. But also, I’m a greedy academic who wants my school story to be about teaching and learning. 

I’m not sure how much I have addressed this already, but, yeah, a significant problem for My Hero Academia is that there was too much to tackle. It has to explain the setting, which means that, when little changes in that setting, it feels like a missed opportunity. There are so many characters in just Class 1-A that it doesn’t even feel like a Pixar film (I know I’ve brought up that comparison before) where each supporting character has an arc, however small, and gets one moment in the spotlight to help bring about the resolution of the story: the shoe-horning of Sero, Sato, and Ojiro against All For One felt like too little, too late. 

And, spoilers for the fourth film, it doesn’t get better: is this really all we can show for each character’s desires? I appreciate giving Tokoyami a moment to shine, but it is so random that has to be him--and, in my cynicism, it is done just to prop up Hawks yet again when he doesn’t need it. Can we please have one film where the stars are not Izuku, Todoroki, and the angry explosion guy--there are other student heroes who could handle their own film. 

So, yeah, maybe if more of Izuku’s storyline had a clearer narrative focus. Like I said above, the fourth film doesn’t really do much to state what his goals are beyond “be a hero like All Might”--he’s done that, over and over again--what is the next step for him? I don’t want to go back to the debate about whether Izuku becoming a teacher and supposedly single were good or bad for him--but it would have helped to have telegraphed this stuff earlier. Even Treasure Planet made sure to have Amelia mention quickly in passing she’ll recommend Jim for the naval academy so that we aren’t shocked why Jim returns home now as a naval cadet--we couldn’t have used that recent one-shot tie-in manga to the fourth film to have someone tell Izuku, “You should be a teacher” so that his post-Pro Hero life isn’t such a swerve? 

As for focusing on just a handful of the supporting characters: I honestly wouldn’t mind if every last single character got their own arc--but Horikoshi didn’t have the time in one manga to do it, and unfortunately the spinoffs haven’t helped. Present Mic gets pushed to the side despite how integral he is to Aizawa and Kurogiri and Midnight’s stories. I’d even take something equivalent to the finale of Deep Space Nine, a montage that suggests we had meaningful arcs to the characters, even if we didn’t really: “Oh, yeah, I remember that one chapter of Team-Up Missions--huh, I guess that was a good encapsulation of this character’s entire arc, so, yeah, I got closure for them.” 

We agree that Horikoshi did not show the kind of change to the status quo that we would want the story to show. 

I guess I’m still confused why the status quo stays the same. 

I wonder how much of this is, as I have argued before, because, as with numerous superhero stories, the status quo has to be maintained so that you keep having the same familiar characters who don’t get older, don’t get married, don’t have kids, and you can keep them in the same stage of life with the same adventures to sell the same merchandise. 

Or, I wonder how much of this is because this is Horikoshi’s habit. 

Granted, Barrage never had a decent conclusion, but from how My Hero Academia turned out, I would not be surprised if the monarchy persisted as it did since the beginning, rather than the story confronting that maybe the King and his soldiers like Tiamat were refusing to confront the need for change. 

But then again, Oumagadoki Zoo seemed like a story about change. I mean, sure, the “deaths” of the animals (they sacrifice their ability to transform to re-empower Shiina so he can win the fight) were overturned almost immediately (Shiina just had to give the magic back--there, done). But the zoo went through changes, the animals from the other locations (the aquarium and the circus) showed the capacity for change, emphasized in the last pages when Hana sees Shikuma start to resume his human appearance despite his villainous nature. 

And as you said, we have only conjecture as to what factors influenced Horikoshi and his editors to wrap up the manga as they did. I really hope it was not criticism against focusing on the Villains--which, if that was a factor, I can’t see it on the page, because even the final arc is so focused on wrapping up the stories for Shigaraki, Spinner, Toga, and Dabi that, at best, it’s giving me what I want to wrap up their stories (even if I don’t like how they wrapped up) and, at worst, a big middle finger for those readers who (wrongly) criticized focusing on the villains. 

[amischiefofdeets]

NOVASTAR

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CHARACTER SUMMARY

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Nathan, also known as 'Novastar' is a low-rank superhero capable of manipulating molecules, his power is strong but he struggles with using it for the fear of making a mistake and hurting/killing someone with it. Instead he'll only use it on in-animate objects. A celestial event struck Earth giving those exposed to it directly abilities, Nathan had no idea about his own until his partner vanished after an argument, he tried to use it to help others and hopefully find him one day. When he learned of the mental effects the powers had, he knew Cole had been affected in such a way and a growing feeling of guilt has him trying to save villains when possible, as he is convinced something awful happened to Cole when he ran away considering how unstable he was. Though he is still a librarian at the University he worked at prior, he spends all of his free time helping those who need it. Whether it's cleaning up after a villains rampage, getting the injured to safety or stopping just regular thieves, he'll do what he can. All the while he is having to deal with an obsessive villain, Duplicity, who seems to relish in tormenting him while he works. Note: I am happy to rework my bois to make them fit into hero universes, so they can be used for Marvel/DC/ect. if wanted.

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MUSE DETAILS

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Name: Nathaniel Winters Nicknames: Nate, Nathan, Novastar Race: Mutated Human Born: [UNKNOWN] Age: 28 Height: 5'7 Gender: Male Sexuality: Gay Location: New York Occupation: Small-time hero/Librarian Abilities: Manipulating molecules, including his own - this allows him to float/fly. This also allows him to change materials into other materials, though he refuses to use that on living things for fear of causing a lot of harm.

Scars: None Tattoos: None Alignment: Lawful Good Goals: Hobbies: Likes: Saving people, making friends with fellow heroes, calm nights - ideally with friends, reading, hot chocolate Dislikes: Hurting others, being alone, dwelling on the past Mental state: Deals with having to mourn his former partner but he is trying to move past it, use it as a reason to go forward and do good. Disabilities: Reputation: Family: Amelia Rees - Mother Richard Winters - Father Cecelia Winters - Sister Abigail Winters - Sister Toyhou.se: [LINK] Characterhub: [LINK]

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HISTORY

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This is based on my own story where people gained powers via a cosmic event - some 20% of the planet gained powers and a small group of those were negatively affected by those powers, making them lash out and their personalities change drastically. Before the event Nathan was living happily with his boyfriend Cole, the two of them a pair of introverts just wanting to spend a peaceful life together but that changed very quickly after the event occured. Cole began acting irrationally, losing his temper and lashing out - this scared Nathan and during a particularly bad fight he told Cole to leave. And so he did. And he never showed up again. No one knew where Cole went and as time went by with no sign of him, Nathan feared the worst and blamed himself. It was during this time that he learned of his power to manipulate the molecules of objects by touching them and focusing his intent. Determined to make a positive difference in the world, he opted to use that power for good, becoming one of many heroes taking their place to protect the world from the 'villains' that arose after the event. He refuses to hurt villains, especially after learning that many of them can't control themselves (much like his partner couldn't), he thinks they deserve the help they need. Unbeknownst to him his partner isn't dead, in fact he's one of the strongest and most feared villains in the area - a shapeshifter going by the name Duplicity. Duplicity often shapeshifts into various people in Nathan's life, ranging from civilians to be saved, to neighbours, to fellow heroes. He is obsessed with the hero and considers him HIS. Anyone who gets too close to Nathan is in trouble.

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TAGS

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