#THIS IS JUST TAKING MUCH LONGER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD

[nemesyaaa]

sweet babyface // toxic!bbydaddy!rafe x reader

summary ; rafe was decided to make your little one, a kook princess. and if it means to spend a million of dollars on a diamond swarovski tiara just to see it on the head of his daughter, you can be sure he's gonna do it.

warnings ; basically fluff but i would add +18 bc of a little bit of suggestive content but not real smut. mention of breeding kink. kind of toxic relationship. a bit of stalking. financial dependence. be aware of the warnings.

author's note ; i just wanted to mention @princessbrunette for the bbydaddy!rafe verse. you can check it on her account <3

even if you tried every time to keep him away, push him away, avoid him or chase him, rafe always came back. you could be cold, distant, suspicious and even cruel, he didn't care. by the way, he was better than you at that game anyway? it wasn’t for nothing that you always lost trying to fight him. he was winning while you were just exhausting yourself out. sometimes you wonder why you let him into your life, why you thought it would be a good idea to have a baby with him when everyone on the island told you he was unstable and uncontrollable. some even laughed at your situation, saying it was like giving something to the devil and hoping he doesn't use it against you.

you couldn't say rafe was a bad father. your daughter had always been outrageously spoiled. he always gave her the biggest and greatest gifts. nothing was ever good enough for his princess. he always thought big when it came to his baby. even if you were a pogue, he wanted to raise her as a fucking kook.

and sometimes you wondered if he did all this out of pure fatherly love or out of narcissism or ego.even if you hated him so much, he absolutely needed to make sure your child was on his side. every time he was there, it was like you no longer existed. the house was full of "dad," "daddy, “ or “ papa, " and babbling and laughing. it was always his name, she never called you. and you always felt a pang in your heart every time he grabbed her in his big veiny arms, making her the happiest little girl before taking her away from you to go on some weekly trips.

even when he was not at home, it was always with the toys he gave her that she played, the dresses he gave her that she wore, the hairstyles that he validated by facetime that she asked you to make, the meals he delivered that she wanted to eat. she was truly daddy’s girl. even in her facial features.

so no matter how much you tried to ignore him, he was still there somehow . through the demands of your daughter, the hundreds of deliveries a day to your door, the objects in this house and even its walls because he was obviously the one who paid for it.

you didn't need to work. you had access to all his cards. at first you spent tons of money on unnecessary expenses hoping it would drive him crazy but the next day you saw that even more money had been added to the bank account.

but rafe cameron didn't give you access to his banking data out of pure kindness and affection alone. he was also looking for a way to control you, and stay in your life. then, with that, he could also stalk you and do inappropriate things like when you bought lingerie and he received the bill. he couldn't stop himself from sending you a message. “don't want to see me, but you dress yourself like you want me to give you a second baby ;) ”

the only rule was that you were forbidden from going to see another man and even less from inviting him to the house. he manipulated you by saying it was for your daughter's mental balance but it was purely out of jealousy. and you knew it very well. you weren't the stupid naive girl he had gaslighted in the past and who he could lie to so easily anymore.

one day, you were giving your kid the extremely expensive cupcakes rafe had bought for her breakfast, trying not to comment on the ridiculousness of the prices but especially the situation, and there was a knock at the door. when you saw through the blinder that it was him, you stepped back discreetly, swallowing hard to not clench. your heart was beating fast in your ribcage as you were trying to silence your stepfoots.

“I know you're here.” you had heard his loud firm raspy voice through the door. “baby, i can hear you breathing and backing up from here. come on, i thought we both get over the time i scared you. ”

he continued to knock on the door until your old neighbor called you claiming that a crazy madman was in front of your house and didn't want to leave.

you had been forced to open up to him which made you even angrier.

but that didn’t stop him from smiling at you, the insatiable white colgate smile. his clean and fresh mullet was long enough that hair brushed the back of his neck. he was wearing one of his perfect black suits with the sleeves rolled up to show a glimpse of his nice shirt. a Rolex was tight around his veiny wrist, and the same rings he always wore were wrapped around his fingers.

he had his ear pierced recently with your daughter. you had been against it, but she still wanted to do like her father so you had no authority over the sweet monster. but you had to admit that the jewelry suited them both so well. especially on rafe, you couldn't help but think about kissing his ear, but especially biting his earlobe while caressing the silver piercing until it's wet and rolling against your tongue. all this perhaps while thinking of having a baby again.

“I should be allowed to come here whenever I want. " he had sworn under his breath, staring at you with his evil blue eyes.

“tell me what you have to say or I’ll call the police.” you replied shortly.

"I want to see my girl. I mean, the one who likes to call me daddy. "

“It’s not funny and she doesn’t want to…”

you hadn't had time to finish speaking before your babyface's little footsteps were running on the floor to come into the hall.

“daddy! " she exclaimed before being carried off the ground to snuggle into her father's strong arms, her little frame being hidden by the size of his biceps.

“that's my little girl.” he welcomed her with a kiss on the cheek, making her chuckle.

"I missed you! please, stay !" your kid had asked with bubbly face and pleading eyes, her childish pout so irresistible to say no.

“of course, I’m staying.”

“raf…” you started but he ignored you, walking in the house without your permission into the living room.

“I have something for you, peaches. ”

he took a present out of his bag and you rolled your eyes. you already knew it was going to be something crazy like the giant dollhouse he built in her bedroom, or the huge dinette in the playroom, or a scary tall comfort teddy bear that she couldn't even carry in her tiny hands. sometimes you wondered what he could offer to her because she already had everything. he had literally built her a heaven.

your daughter's eyes widened in surprise, while a smile floated across her lips in excitement. she opened the gift and took out a silver tiara set with diamonds and stunning crystals signed by Swarovski.

“she’s a baby, rafe…” you commented.

"no, she's a princess. " he corrected you and fixed your little one's hair before putting the tiara on her head, and placing a smack on her forehead. “ don't you see that kook babyface ? ”

she giggled before wrapping her hands around his neck to thank him.

“we need to talk.” you said.

"later. i have a princess to honor for now."

you wanted to fight back and kill him but you couldn't resist your daughter's face. she was happy to be with her father. and you knew it was important for girls to establish a strong bond with their father. and there was this bright spark that shone in her eyes every time she saw him that made you melt.

so you let him stay at home. he stayed with her all day. she managed to make him do whatever she wanted, and that's how he found himself playing with dolls, watching the princess and the frog, doing karaoke to barbie songs, serving as a client for a makeup session, and judging all of her princess dresses while she was making him a haul.

No matter how angry you were that he showed up like that and decided to stay, you couldn't deny the fact that he was damn good, that in the moment, you couldn't find any reason not to like him, even when he caught you spying on them and sent you a smirk to remember that you had no control.

you had decided to do some cleaning, to leave them both for a bit until the end of the day. after a long moment, rafe decided to leave her alone for a bit.

you were downstairs, and you were making food. he raised an eyebrow when he saw you. “don’t forget me.”

“no I’m sorry, I’m cooking for two and you’re not included in it.”

“I was included in this pussy to make you a baby so you can include me in this meal for one night, baby. ‘s nothing. ” he shouted back, chewing some gum arrogantly.

“don’t be trashy.”

"you used to like this..." he carefully said, because he knew he was treading on sensitive ground.

he stood in front of you, picking a taste of the ranch sauce from the bowl before putting it in his mouth. you watched him do it, glaring at the smile on his so fucking evil lickable lips.

“ taste's good. ”

“I want you to leave. “

"We should ask every part of your body if they're okay with this. Maybe it would put you back into your place to feel betrayed by your own self. "

“You’re not good for her.” you confessed.

“I am her father. And from what i know, she's very happy with me. You're the one to have a problem with my presence here. ”

"Please, leave the house. I don't want to call the police."

“exactly, baby.” he moved to stand behind you, rearranging a strand of your hair, his breath hot on the back of your neck. “you don’t want to do it. And you're not forced to do it…” he caressed your hand, slowly putting the knife away from your fingers.

“Step back.”

"I want to stay here tonight. Just this night. She really wants me to stay and would it be cruel to make her sad? You don't want to be the villain, right ? "

“don’t try to manipulate me.”

" mmh, just telling the truth and it makes you mad. you can hate me if you want but she needs me. i'm her dad and you know if I wanted to, I could make her come with me but I love seeing you together. you're a great mom.”

"you will sleep on the couch. and that is non-negotiable. you don't try anything with me, is that okay?"

“Come on, we can sleep together. We are mature and consenting adults.” he replied. "There's nothing I haven't seen before, baby. I know all that lingerie as well as that body hidden behind it."

“about that, stop stalking my bills.”

"Mine , baby. you mean, my bills. these are my cards that you use for your pleasures so I have the right to have an eye on them. even more so when I receive bills for sex toys. you should call me instead of handling it? yourself.”

"After trying them, I'm not sure that you're big enough now. “

jesus, you knew how to provoke him and it worked. he had sniffed the air loudly, trying to contain himself because honestly, he only wanted one thing at the moment, a strong urge that was to fuck you dirty on that counter until he was sure to see your hole tearing to death and dripping to get his cock in. jesus, yeah, he would give anything to see you grimace because it will never fit in but prove you wrong by giving you a second baby.

his jaw was tense and his nostrils were flared. he was forced to clench his fist to avoid touching you. " the day when your babygirl will want a little sister or brother, you better be begging on all fours on my fucking doorstep to convince me to give you another baby. so better to start now and stretch that hole very hard before it's happening because i'm gonna make sure to be breeding you enough to change your whole dna. ”

“ aren't you tired of thr…”

“mom, dad, what are you talking about?” the little girl burst into the kitchen, still with her tiara on her head. a smile appeared when she saw that her dad was still there. because it was rare for him to stay that late.

you warned rafe with your eyes, slashing violently at pieces of vegetables with the knife back in your hand.

“ we were thinking that i could stay tonight. what's your thoughts on this, little one ? want daddy to stay ? ”

“ yes ! i don't want you to leave. stay foreveeeer with me. ”

“ but you know, he can't. he's a businessman. ” you replied.

“ what do you mean, baby ? my only business is right here. ”

” Rafe. ” you said.

“ Baby ? ” he replied with a cocky smile. “ Why don't you tell us what you're cooking ? Seems delicious. Maybe we could get a taste. ”

“ Sweetie, can you go to your room for a second ? I need to talk with your dad. It's not gonna be long. ”

She pouted but agreed after Rafe promised her something if she was listening to her mom.

“you know you can’t stay. "

"All I know is that there is my name in the papers of this house, on your bills, and even on your documents. If I can't stay, you can't escape. So what's better ? ”

[saymio]

Little Girls Shouldn't Be Out Alone

Pairing: The Salesman x Fem!reader

Summary: running away from home might've been the worst decision of your life.. but its not because youre homeless now, its because you met him.

Warning: dead dove do not eat, brief knife play, dubcon, light bdsm, kidnapping/stalking, age gap, mentions of suicide + more.

A/N: not proof read. I tried doing the salesman justice..I promise

6.9k Words

...

the scene you were in was so cliche it was almost funny. your mother died not too long ago, and it was really hard for you because she was the one person in your life that seemed to really care about you. she was everything you wanted to be in life..growing up she was your idol, and to this day she still is... you just wished you had noticed it sooner.. maybe if you did you could've prevented it.. prevented her suicide. its been 2 months but it still haunts your brain, the scene of it. you wanted to throw up thinking about it. her bright smile ceased to exist, her intelligence couldnt impress you any more. it all ended with the gun going off in her mouth..intelligence splattered all over the walls of her shared bedroom with the gun laying next to her... and in result of your mothers suicide your father had to take you in. they had divorced when you were around 4 years old...you don't remember much. but living with him made you realize, your mother did the best choice she could've made then..even if she cried over it for years.

your father was an alcoholic, he didn't abuse you with hits and violence but he abused you with words. blaming you from the divorce and suicide of your mother. you tried to not let it get to your head..it wasn't your fault and he knew it. if anything the blood of your mother stained his hands.. but with the never lasting tournament he inflicted on you a part of you thought maybe he was right...maybe she didn't end her life over you but you could've prevented it. you were the closest person to your mother and vice versa..so..how did you never notice it? her suffering? did you miss all the signals..how stupid were you... she ended her life and you did nothing about it. you were useless...as per usual...

anyways...as you were saying. the scene you stood in the middle in was so cliche, it was like it belonged in a teenagers wattpad story. you were crouched down in an alley way, rain soaking you and everything around you as you sobbed into your hands. you couldn't live with your father anymore, you just couldn't. you knew if you stayed just one week longer..you'd follow your moms footsteps.. you hated this, you just wanted to live a happy normal life. apply for a nice university, move into a dorm, and visit your mom and dad during breaks... but the world wanted otherwise. here you were, drenched in water as you sat in the middle of nowhere...you had run away from home. you had no idea what to do next. your covered your backpack in a plastic bag but it barely helped. all your necessities were wet and your money was probably soggy by now. you're so stupid. couldve you just checked the forecast. to make sure the day you run away from home was a day the weather wouldn't freeze you alive? you couldnt do anything, nothing at all. should you just head back home? deal with your fathers screams for just a few months more before you could save up and move out? or should you just stay here..soggy and homeless... you knew what you were going to do... you'd stay here. you could take what the world would throw at you. you knew you could..but you just couldn't take another second of your dads tormenting. hes probably hoping you went off and jumped off a bridge or something..ending your fate just like your mother did.

you had fallen asleep, it was still raining and cold...but it was notably less than before. you were shivering, shaking in both fear and how frigid you were feeling. your teeth were clattering and you were being hyper aware of everything around you. if someone comes up to me all scary and intimidating I'll throw my backpack at them. it'll give me time to run away.. the sound of cars driving on the slippery wet roads filled your ears ever so often...the street was dead. if something happened to you no one would know.. squish squish squish you could hear the sound of foot steps echo around the streets...and it was getting louder..closer... until... "what are you doing here." a man holding an umbrella was standing Infront of you, he looked neat and tidy. the opposite of what you looked like at the moment. his suit was ironed to perfection, not a wrinkle in site. his hair slicked back neatly with gel.. and his features... they were striking and fierce.. he was handsome.. he tilted his head to the side and stared at you with his souless dark eyes. "well?" his tone wasnt soft but it wasn't stern either...it was like he was asking a child if they could hand him over the toy they've been playing with... you gulped down the lump that was forming inside your throat. "n-nothing..nothing important.." you spoke, barely over a whisper. you were nervous and scared. you felt like something was off about him, he just seemed too good to be true. handsome men like him always have something they hide from the rest of the world. he raises his right eyebrow at you, obviously not believing that you were doing nothing.. "do you need help? I could get you a new pair of clothes. this area is dangerous, did you know that?" he smiled at you, but it wasn't genuine at all. it was like one of annoyance...if he was so annoyed why would he offer a hand to you? it didn't make sense... you stared up at him from the floor, you felt like a stray puppy left in a box. and he was here to pick you up and become your new owner.. you knew this was probably a bad idea, you knew he was bad business. but.... you were so scared and cold in the rain..what would be worse than this? "yeah...I need help.." you spoke softly, you refused to look at him as you did so. you felt embarrassed....asking a stranger for help because of a stupid mistake you did with your own free will..you're pathetic... "great, I'd love to help you. follow me." he spoke, but it didn't seem like he was glad or happy to be at help at all.. he spoke with a deadpan voice, as if he was bored and wanted to get this over with. was this some sort of community service thing he has to do? help the homeless during the rain? whys he acting like he's being forced at gunpoint to do this... you got up from the ground, all wet and soaked in rain water. you felt so uncomfortable you wanted it to end..you grabbed your bag and followed him at a small distance... he lead you to a car. a black suv, it was clean and pretty...and it looked warm. you kept walking until you were right next to him, was he gonna let you inside the car? but you'd make it dirty and wet..and was this even a good idea??? heading inside a strange mans car in the middle of the night in the pouring rain.. but you didnt have much time to think much about it as he had opened a door to the car..the interior was a lot like him. clean, tidy and sleek... "well? get inside, don't worry about getting it wet. I don't mind." he smiled at you again, with the same fake smile that made your skin crawl because of the sheer eeriness to it. "ah- yes okay..." you crawled into the car, your wet clothes making a slight squeaky sound against the material of the car seat.. you set your bag next to you as he slammed the door shut...and it was pretty aggressive. the loud slam that echoed through the streets from it made you flinch as you stared at him walking around the car to the drivers seat.

you were sitting on the toilet, inside of this strange mans house...I mean, nothing happened yet so you should be safe right?... you turn to look at the shower that was running, waiting for the water to turn warm..and then you stared at the folded clothes. he grabbed some clothes he thought would fit you and sent you to the bathroom with it. you were confused, he was being nice..but for what? it seemed like he didn't want anything from you..maybe he was a little annoyed but he was still helping you.. he seemed normal.. you were so confused. he even put the clothes you were wearing and the clothes that got wet in your backpack into the washer. maybe humanity is just getting better and he's truly just a kind man who wants to help? you stare around in the bathroom, its almost all white with black accents. it was very modern and clean..paintings on the walls that probably cost more than your houses rent..because truthfully this man was obviously very rich. his house was huge and it seemed like he had rows and rows of guest rooms..it was impressive. maybe he was just a snobby rich guy that was trying to fix his attitude. so maybe that's why he seemed so annoyed and put off with you.. he was trying to fix his views on dirty poor people by helping them!! that had to be it..you just cracked the code!! you smirk to yourself and give yourself an imaginary pat on the back before checking the water to see if it was hot now..and when it was you stepped into the shower. the warm water fell onto your body, like it was engulfing you in a tight hug. even though you were in a strangers house, in an area you didn't even know existed...you felt like you were at home. taking a warm shower, getting ready to go out with your mom..... you and the strange man haven't spoken much, he just gave you clothes, put your old clothes in the washer, gave you food and sent you to a guest room.. he was cold, you'd expect a man that was willing to help a stranger from the streets to be nice..and warmer. but he wasn't. you were getting curious about him, what was his name? where did he work? why'd he even help you...but you decided to stay in your place. at the end of the day, you two were still strangers who would never meet again after this. the thought kind of left a pang in your heart. you wanted to know more about him..maybe..maybe he'll want to stay in touch..? but you highly doubted that considering how cold and silent he was. he probably just felt pity seeing such a young girl sleeping in the rain on the streets...he didn't do this to get close. just to make himself feel better.. that's how rich people just are.. you sighed and stared up at the ceiling of the room..you'd be out of there by tomorrow, left in the streets all alone again. you felt your eyelids getting heavy, you started to black out until you closed your eyes and fell asleep..sound asleep.

you woke up to the sound of knocking on the bedroom door, you could only assume it was the man that helped you last night because..who else could it be? you woke up, still droopy as you stretched and looked out the windows. it was bright out now...it was time to get up... you didn't want to but that didn't matter because this wasn't even your house. you got out of the bed and put the slippers the man gave you on. you pulled the shirt that was slipping off your shoulder up as you lazily shuffled your way to the door and creaked it open. you started up at the taller man, again in his neat suit and styled hair. he always manages to unintentionally..or maybe intentionally embarrass you. "still sleepy, huh? you should change and put your clothes in your bag. breakfast is being made." he flashes you another smile...a fake forced smile. its like he doesn't know how to smile or something...you just slowly nod your head at him before he turns around and leaves... you were hoping he'd get the sense of pity again and let you stay longer. you wouldn't mind being treated llke shit here if it meant you got to stay in this house. but of course..people don't like it when cockroaches sneak inside. you closed the door In front of you and did the bed. you didn't want to leave with a bad impression In case he even gets this weird savior complex again..you did the bed and packed your clothes, you headed your way downstairs to the kitchen with your bag in hand...that smell..it smelled like home. the smell of bacon filled your senses as you got closer and closer down the stairs. you haven't smelled something like that in the morning since your mother died, she would always make you eggs, bacon and toast. it was simple but you loved it. you just wished you had savored it more because with no shocker,, your dad doesn't cook. at all. you almost always order something and if you don't you're the one cooking. but even then, he always complains about how shitty your food tastes..even though you know its not true. you finally get to the end of the staircase, the stairs end right near the kitchen so you get a good look at what's going on. it seems he has a personal chef cooking up breakfast as he's sat at the table, sipping on coffee while on his phone. "ahem.." you awkwardly announce your presence to the man at the table, he stares up at you with a blank face. eyes full of nothing but darkness..the more you stare the scarier he gets. as if he were a walking body with no soul inside of him. "sit down. breakfast is almost finished." he speaks blankly, just like his face. something about the atmosphere feels a lot more awkward than before. it seems he isn't even bothering to smile at you like earlier...maybe something happened while you got changed? or maybe he's just not a morning person...you wouldn't really know but you started day dreaming. wondering about his life. maybe its because of how mysterious he is, or his face or wealth..you weren't really sure but something about him allured you. you wanted to know more even if he didn't want to know more about you. you didn't really care if the interest was one sided. you were just too curious... but again, not your place.. at least you felt like it wasn't..he was clearly not interested in having small talk with you. like at all. you didn't want to annoy him more than he seemingly already was. you wanted him to help you again because truthfully, no matter how scary he was or seemed..he was still helping you.. and you need the help. and appreciated it.. minutes passed and nothing was even muttered, a small cough or creak of the chair every now and then but that was it...and the silence was deafening. it was so awkward you could die..you were fiddling with your fingers waiting for the food, you almost just wanted to ask if you could leave now and that you didn't want to eat but.. that would be rude, and you didn't want to be rude. so you just sat still, letting the silence explode your eardrums. . .

"your food is ready" those four words felt like an angel had just saved you from hell, you were about to explode from the tension. and it wasn't the good kind. "ah, thank you!" you bowed your head at the lady that cooked the breakfast as she walked away.. you looked at your plate and then at the mans non existent one..he wasn't going to eat breakfast? he has seen your confused stares because he set his phone down and placed his chin on his hand, he was staring right at you. "I don't eat breakfast. I was just waiting for you to get your food." he stared at you before smiling at you, it wasn't as eerie or fake as the other smiles he's given you but..it was exactly genuine either. like a pity smile..something along those lines. "oh..thank you for waiting.." you bowed your head at him too before you began to eat..it was the same breakfast..the same one your mother had always made for you..what were the odds?..right? you felt yourself getting emotional, eating this simple breakfast just reminded you of your mother. but you couldnt cry Infront of this man...he'd probably just stare at you and do nothing about your sad state...you didn't feel like embarrassing yourself like that. not Infront of this stranger. . . . . "I finished..." you stare up at him, your entire plate is finished due to not eating all day yesterday. he stared at your plate and then at you, you felt kind of embarrassed..like he was judging you for eating.. "okay, should I leave you where I found you or at a house" he stared at you with a blank face, emotionless as he awaited your answer. you help in a frown at the way he worded it, sure he found you but...it felt like he was referring to you as if you were a stray animal. you bit the inside of your right cheek, you really didn't want to go. you wanted to stay safe in shelter but you didn't have a choice...you could either ask him to take you back to the place you dreaded the most, or a place you dreaded a little less... "take me back to the alley way you saw me in.." you stared at your lap as he nodded. he pushed his chair back before taking one last sip of his coffee. "follow me to the car." he pushed his chair back under the table as you got up right after him... I guess now my journey as a homeless person really starts now...I need to find a job soon...

time skip

its been a couple of days since the strange man helped you from the alley way. your delusional side tells you one day he'll be back for you so you sleep there everynight, letting a dumpster bin hide your sleeping body from those who pass by the alley way. todays its been awfully gloomy, cloudy, windy and cold.. you were hoping it wouldn't rain since you didn't want to stay there cold and wet again..and you highly doubted the man would be back for you if it did...you spent most of these days searching for a job, with no avail.. rejection after rejection ...it was wearing you down... how long would you even hold up for in these streets? you were barely 20 but you were already on the streets. not like you had a choice. it was either suicide or homelessness for you.. you decided to just take a break from searching for jobs today. you didn't have much money left from your savings but you had enough spare change to go to put your dirty clothes and buy an ice cream in the park nearby...you went looking around for a big enough plastic bag to cover your backpack in. you had a feeling it would rain hard again, you could smell it even. and you didn't want to play princess waiting for her knight in shining armor to come save her. you need to think ahead..and be smart..

as always..you were right. it was going to rain today, and it was raining hard. it brought you back to the day you were found by the man all cold and scared in the rain. you were lucky he didn't rape you, you were too trusting of him.. you were once again shuffled up in the alley way, wet and cold. you were sitting on the ground hugging yourself while your backpack sat next to you. at least you found a bag for it, at most it'd get a little wet but nothing compared to last time... your hair and clothes were soaked, you could feel water droplets form on your eyelashes as you tried to wipe away the water that was landing on your face with your equally as wet hands. you were scared..again. you were hoping to god the man would come back, you even place your backpack in view to the street and road Incase he passed by..he would know you were still there. your entire body was ice cold, your breath, fingers, clothes, you were freezing.. after a few hours of sitting in the rain you decided that it was about time you just go to sleep..no one was going to come by and save you again. you leaned your head onto the dumpster next to you and fell asleep. the sheer cold and wetness of the situation didn't leave your senses but..it was almost like you had forgotten about it while you slept. . . . "again?" you heard a voice, a very familiar voice..you jumped out of your sleep and looked up at the person standing infront of you. it was the man that had helped you last time this happened. you felt your cheeks warm up, both at how embarrassing this was, and how sweet (?) it was.. he came back to check on you. whether it was out of worry or pity, you couldn't tell. but either way it made you happy to see someone checking up on you. he just started at you, with the same dark, soulless eyes as always. he just turned around and started walking away. you didn't know whether you should follow him or not..but you trusted your guts and you did. he led you to the same suv as before, it even looked the same. clean, sleek..like you hadn't gotten it dirty that day you got in. "get in" he stared at you, waiting for your response. his sentence threw you off a little, it was as if he was commanding you...but you didn't pay much attention and got inside the car. watching him as he slammed the door again..and walked around the car into the drivers seat. he was still the same.. but in his defense its only been 4 days since he had helped you.

you two were sitting at the dining table, his cook had made the two of you steak with some veggies.. you weren't that hungry but you still ate to be respectful..the same awkward silence corrupted a seemingly 'wholesome' moment. you wanted to say something, it was itching inside your throat. you just wanted to ask his name so you didn't have to call him a stranger anymore.. but he still didn't seem interested. why the hell would he help you if he wasn't interested in even getting to know your name? this was the second time. and even if he denied it was obvious he went there for you..to help you. "you, what's your name." he had put down his fork and knife and stared at you, obviously asking you the question. but you still felt unsure if you should answer. what if he was looking at someone else..or what if he was insane and talking to himself..you were so lost in your thoughts you didn't even notice how his face was changing. he was getting irritated with you. "well? I asked you a question." his voice was more stern than before, his eyebrows were raised and he looked at you with an expression you couldn't read. it was probably annoyance though. "oh- I'm sorry..I've just been kind of out of it...my names y/n" you stared at him and give him an awkward smile. you fiddled with your fingers under the table, you didn't know if he was going to keep talking. "I can tell. well y/n, what are you doing outside all alone? don't tell me you're this young and so in debt you had to go homeless." he stared at you, his facial expression changing to disappointment. but you ignored that and processed what he said first, what does he mean he can tell? did he bring you here just to insult you?? you internally scoffed before shaking your head not to him. "I'm thanfully not in any debt... I just left my home for personal reasons.." you weren't staring at his face but you could tell his facial expression changed, he simply just hummed at you and took a sip of his wine. "what about you? what's your name..and how old are you? you felt it was fair to ask him questions back since he had asked you some. it isn't rude to just be curious right? "you can just call me sir. and I'm 42 years old.. old, huh?" he sarcastically laughed and took a sip of his wine. all that you were thinking was, why was he trying to be so mysterious?? "oh..okay..sir" it felt awkward calling him sir, what if it was a weird kink of his..he could've atleast given you a fake name if he wanted to be like that.. . . . . "thank you for helping me again sir" you bowed at him, not too 90 degree angle but just enough for your thankfulness to be clear. "I appreciate it." you smiled at him, and unlike his smiles..yours was genuine. you truly were happy to have been 'safe' from the rain. even if it soaked you for a while... you were at the alley way again, the sky still looked cloudy and sad. you were scared itd rain again but that's a worry youd have to think of for later. "youre welcome y/n." he just gave you another fakeass smile, the one that's painfully obvious like he's doing it on purpose before he got into his car and drove off. leaving you there to figure out what you should do if it does rain again. but you werent too worried..maybe he'd come back..?

history repeats its self, at least it was for you. you kept finding yourself hugging yourself for warmth in the same alley way, with the same rain pouring down on you. was this strange man gonna save you from this rain aswell or has he given up on saving you from the cruel weather. maybe its still you gulp up the courage to go back home because the weather was driving you insane. the mans help wasn't even helping , it was just giving you a false sense of hope. you sat there for hours, under the pouring rain. and even worse, this time it was thundering. your skin was cold and freezing, every inch of you was soaked in water. you wanted to melt into the ground, the scene was so pathetic. you were pathetic. . . . after what felt like an eternity you came to the conclusion he truly wasn't going to help you. you were nothing but a prop to fuel his ego.. you let your heavy eyelids close as the rains soaked you and everything around it... you would just sleep it out..and find somewhere to sleep that wouldn't leave you like this. . . . you fluttered your eyes open not long after you had fallen asleep. you weren't fully awake yet but you have a strange feeling that someone was looking over you...watching you... you turned your head and rubbed your eyes. you stared at the person watching you, it was the strange man!! he was here to save you from the rain one last time.. your eyes brightened as you stared at him, but something was off. he was holding something..your eyes were a little fuzzy so you couldnt see properly but you knew it wasn't an umbrella like always..he was also getting soaked in the rough rain. before you could ask him about it you felt something hard hit your head. like you've just been struck a pipe... you stared up at the man, eyes going droopy as you fell to the ground... did he just hit you? what...what was happening..why you..?

you woke up in a barely lit, red room. you were confused and scared. you didnt remember much.. just the fact that you were hit by some sort of pole and woke up here. did karma finally get to you for not helping your mom in her time of need? were you going to get raped and killed here?? you started to hyperventilate, you wanted to scream for help but you found it hard to even make noise..your throat was closing and it felt like you were going to pass out again.. your breaths were rapid and your body was shaking. you wanted to get away but you couldnt. your wrists were bound to a chair that seemed to be super glued to the floor. you were pulling at the restraints, you were gasping for air. your eyes were slit as they darted around the room..looking for anyone that could help you... "fuck you look so hot when you're scared" a figure walked out from the shadows of the room...it was the man that had been saving you from the rain??! his dark eyes pierced holes into your head, you were trying to process what the fuck was happening.. he stepped closer to you and stopped right Infront of you. you pushed against the floor and chair, trying to find a way to magically get away. your eyes were wide and filled to the brim with fear, your breathing only got worse as you started to let out choked sobs. "p-please..don't do anything to me please..please.. let me go....I wont..tell anyone..please" you closed your eyes shut, not wanting to look at the man that you were hoping just hours ago would come save you. when you wanted to be saved you didn't mean it like this.. your salty tears dripped from your chin onto the collar of the dry shirt you were wearing. it seemed while you were out he had changed you out of your wet clothes and into the same pair you had worn last time you were here.. your head held low as you were sobbing for your dear life, he hasnt done anything to you yet but you knew he was going to. his cold hands touched your chin, yanking it up to stare at him. the action only made you sob harder, your eyes still glued shut. you didn't want to look at him, you did- "open your eyes and stare at me if you don't want to end up dead." you flinched and opened your eyes quickly, your large eyes stared up at his. they were wet and teary...you just wanted to be free..you didn't want to be here..before you could act upon anything he leaned down and licked one of your eyes, licking away the forming tears that were prickling at the corner of it. you didn't know if this was some sort of weird kink of his or if he did it just to make you uncomfortable but you hated it. it felt uncomfortable and too in your space. you hated this foul man. disgusting. your face was a mixture of uncomfortability, anger and fear. and he loved it. "I love that weird face you're making, doll, keep doing it" he smirked at you..he was staring you down. making you even more uncomfortable than before. he was a freak, was he into peoples pain or something?? can he just let you go.. he stared at you even longer..inspecting every little movement your face made...he loved it. he loved seeing you in discomfort and fear. it fit you, really well. "ever since I've seen you I've been mesmerized... don't mistaken my words as a confession though. this isn't love. this is desire." he reached his hand out to your head, patting and petting you. ruffling your hair and making it all messy..as if you were his pet. "you know, when I saw you..I thought to myself.. 'little girls shouldn't be out alone'..especially in the rain.. where gross men like me could stick their slimy dicks inside you with no consequence." his hand wandered down from your hair to your cheek, down to your neck.. his large hand gripped at your neck, causing you to squirm under the fear he might choke you to death. his eyes and list scrunched into a smile as his hand pressed on your neck, watching you squirm under his grip. "I wouldn't kill you before putting my dick inside you. so calm down, will you?" he grips tighter around your neck as his other hand crawls its way down up body....

he stripped the clothes you had on from your body, you were sitting on the chair, naked. your wrists are still bounded to the chair so you couldn't move or go anywhere. you felt so gross. a random middle aged man was manhandling your tits, grabbing them so hard it left red marks on them. you were holding in moans, you were scared but fuck did his hands feel good on your sensitive nipples. but you didn't want him to know you didn't want him to know you were feeling go- "AH!~" you let out a mixture of a scream and a moan, his right hand had snuck its way down from your chest to your now wet pussy. he shoved two fingers inside, no warning, no prep, just shoved them in. only using the wetness of your pussy to help his movements. your back arched against the chair, you were moaning in both pain and pleasure now. he was handling you like a piece of meat, roughly 'massaging' your boobs and ruining your insides. he made rough scissor motions with his fingers, occasionally curling them inside of you. it hurt so bad, it hurt. so. bad. "you cried and sobbed like you didn't want this but look at you now. moaning under me. you were even wet when I put my fingers in. slut." his voice was deep and full of need,, he took his hand away from your tits before he slapped you. really hard. the skin on your cheek stung and was probably starting to turn red.. but it felt good..even thought you didn't want this, and all you wanted to do was go home...his fingers..they felt too good to go back. "fuck I wanna make you go through so much pain, I want to ruin you. fuck." his fingers continued to ravish your insides as he shamelessly started to rub his hard on. he was getting so turned on by this. a scared young girl, pleasuring the older scary guy Infront of her so he can make it out alive.. he wanted more. he took his hand out of your pussy, your clit was twitching. needy for more. you whined at him, you wanted to cum, you wanted to release.. you wanted it all... he scoffed at you before spitting onto your face and giving you another harsh slap. "stop complaining bitch, be grateful anyone would even want to fuck a dirty mutt like you." he tsk'd at you before turning around and grabbing something from a small box nearby. your heart was pounding, your mind was racing and your hole was pulsing. the way he disrespected you, the way he spoke to you.. it turned you on. were you just needy for approval and wanted to do what it takes to impress the guy? or maybe it was so you could keep your life..or maybe you were just insanely horny. you didn't even know at this point. you didn't know what was taking over you. the man turned around...holding a knife. you started to feel your heart race in fear again, your breath hitched as you tried to push away from the chair...and of course you couldn't. he stepped closer, and closer, an closer. until he was barely inches away from you. he raised the knife and pointed it at your stomach, pushing it into your skin.. not enough to stab you or make your bleed, but enough for it to hurt. it was like getting a shot at the doctors office that lasted too long for your comfort. you shifted under the knife, you were uncomfortable. not that scared but you were anxious..you didn't like the thought of a sharp knife being pushed onto the skin of your stomach that much.. "you look cute like this. I would cut you but I don't think it's time for that right now." he smiled at you, like you had just won a grand prize..and frankly you think you did. you didn't want to deal with more pain than what you were already feeling. he put the knife down, dropping it onto the floor. your pupils were blown. he looked so hot like this. it was scary but, hot as fuck. "opinions on getting your insides ruined?" he spoke, flashing his signature fake smile.

you were finally free from the chair, your wrists felt so much better. they felt less imprisoned.. but you didn't have much time to think about that as your insides were getting rearranged by the man you had once found safety in. you were in mating press, your thighs were rubbing against the skin of your stomach. loud gross sounds of skin slapping and wet pussy filled the room, he was filling you up. you let out loud unstable moans as he ruined you. his face was stuffed into the crook of your neck as he bit and nipped at it harshly. leaving dark bruises and hickeys on it as he kept slamming into you. your felt sweat dribble from your forehead as your eyes rolled to the back of your head. it felt. so good. you could hear him panting, louder and louder as his dick was hitting places you couldn't dream of reaching on your own. it hurt a lot, it felt like you were going to get split open any second now but..the pleasure..the pleasure of your pain and of his thick cock was flooding your brain. you'd worry about the pain later.. "fuck you look so hot when your insides are getting blown out" he grips at your neck, hard as he fucks you like a ragdoll. your hands fly to his, gripping and clawing at his hand. an attempt to unblock your airway, to no avail. his movements started to get rabid and sloppy, he was close. you knew he was. he let go of your neck, leaving a faint bruise due to his grip before he slapped your cheek again. the stinging, it only got worse. you felt like every inch of your body was getting ruined and beat. and truthfully, you loved it. "fuuu- fuuck.. sir- i- fuck..m' gonna cum! m' close! please let me cum! please please please!" your words were fast and sloppy, you were close, you needed to cum you needed it. he spat on your face again, making you feel like a disgusting piece of meat..but you loved it. you wanted to make him proud. he took his left hand and started to rub your clit as he slammed into you. each time it got faster and faster. "cum for me baby, show me how much you love my cock..fuuck.." you arched your back against the bed as it started to make a loud annoying squeaking sound from the rapid movements on it. "fu- ah~! fuckfuckfuckfuck yes yes please ah more more please ah ouh..~" your loud moans filled the room as you came all over his cock, leaving a white ring of sticky substance at the base of his dick. shortly after he came inside of you, filling you up with cum with a loud(ish) grunt. he didn't stop though, he kept moving, not only to help you out your high but to bring you to another. this man doesn't intend to stop until youre full of bruises and unable to walk..

Another note: I REALLY HOPE THIS IS GOOD, I fr spent all day on this (started at 8am, its already 8pm rn omfg) I hope I portrayed his character well, idk if I made him too mean or tame or wtv idk hshshhs, reqs are open!! pls check blog rules before u send them though:)

TAGLIST: @pollys-doublelife @gongyoosgf

[lushrue]

dinner party (nsfw)

ghoap x fem!reader

cw: oral (m and f receiving), dubcon (sort of?), voyeurism, dom ghost

it was supposed to be a normal dinner party.

by all accounts, it had been up to this point. it wasn’t unusual for your husband to invite the men he worked with over for dinner, especially johnny. the man lives alone, he’d said, least I can do is give ‘em a nice home-cooked meal every once in a while. you always pulled out the stops, cooking something bordering on gourmet that the mess halls couldn’t even hope to replicate. tonight, it had been grilled salmon with wild rice and roasted asparagus.

conversation over dinner was normal, aided by the wine and whiskey loosening everyone’s lips. you’re far more sociable than simon is, but that doesn't take much, so the alcohol kept the words flowing freely. it wasn’t until after dinner that things started to shift.

the three of you settled in the living room with your respective spirits, wrapping up the night with friendly conversation over light dessert. you moved to your usual spot in the armchair beside the bookshelf, but the sound of simon clicking his tongue at you stopped you in your tracks. he was sat in his own chair nearest the sofa, legs spread like a king on his throne. you couldn’t quite keep your eyes from wandering, admiring the way his jeans clung to his thighs. he met your gaze, the corner of his lips quirked up in a mischievous smirk. he patted his thigh and you felt embarrassment burn your cheeks.

you glanced over to johnny, as if to remind simon that you had company, but he didn’t seem to care. his dark eyes stayed fixed on you, silence falling over the room as johnny’s gaze followed his lieutenant’s. simon cocked his head, a gesture that you recognized as obey or else. you didn’t feel like testing the waters tonight, so you padded over to him, perching yourself on his thigh.

your husband’s arm snaked around your waist as you swirled your wine in your glass, staring at the whirlpool it created to distract you from the way johnny was eyeing you. simon had pulled you onto his lap for a reason, and part of you wondered if it wasn’t entirely selfish motivation that had you positioned here. simon’s hand stroked over the crushed velvet of the dress he’d insisted you wear, sliding down to grip your ass occasionally when you got too fidgety.

conversation gradually turned to their work, so you tuned them out. it wasn’t that you weren’t interested; most of it just flew over your head. it gave you time to focus on the way your husband was feeling you up. his hand never stayed in one place too long, sliding from your shoulder to your spine to the nape of your neck and down. it made shivers run down your spine, goosebumps rising on your arms and legs the longer it continued. despite your squirming, you managed to stay ladylike, a metaphorical aspirin between your knees as the two men talked.

“so, how’s y’r sex life?” simon asked, which snapped you back to attention. johnny seemed just as bewildered as you did at the question, his cheeks flushed scarlet beneath the stubble. you nudged simon’s shoulder, shaking your head at him. “simon, that’s not polite,” you said, but he didn’t pay you any mind. he was too busy watching johnny fluster and scramble to find his words. “l.t., I-” he started, but simon held up a hand to stop him. “nah, don’ play dumb with me, lad. heard ya jus’ the other day in the rec room. talkin’ about how ya haven’t had a good shag in months, somethin’ like tha’.”

you were just as embarrassed as johnny was now. you knew simon wasn’t the most tactful of men, but this was a whole other level. johnny stuttered around his words, trying to find some kind of reply that was appropriate for the situation. nothing would be appropriate for this situation, you thought. simon just chuckled, his hand rubbing the plush cheek of your ass. “look how flustered ‘e is, lovie,” he said to you, finally giving you his full attention. “poor man, doesn’ have a good bird like I do. no one to cook ‘im a nice dinner and keep ‘is cock wet.”

as flustered as you were, the words sent a jolt straight to your core. taking care of your husband was a sense of pride for you. you got a primal satisfaction out of sinking to your knees and sucking him dry after he’d had a hard day. it meant the world to you when his shoulders sagged and released the burden that he’d been carrying, all at your hands. you shifted on his lap, pressing your thighs together to get some relieving friction.

simon looked back at johnny, who seemed just as affected. he had his hands clasped over his lap, his gaze cast down at the throw rug like it was the most interesting thing he’d ever seen. “ya wanna know wha’ it’s like, sergeant?” simon asked, his voice dropping into a register only you got to hear. “wanna feel my sweet, pretty dove wrapped aroun’ ya?” johnny jolted like he’d been shocked with a prod, wide blue eyes looking up at his commanding officer. there was bewilderment there, you noticed. clearly, he hadn’t been expecting this. but behind the surprise, there was something more carnal. he looked hungry, like a mutt begging for scraps from the table.

your husband placed a firm hand on your back, taking the wine glass from your hands and coaxing you to stand. “g’won, lovie. on your knees for our bashful lad, hmm?” simon’s choice of words struck you. our. this was for both of you, not just simon. the two of you had discussed the idea of a threesome once, but it felt like a pipe dream then. you’d expressed interest, never really expecting simon to share but confessing your fantasy all the same. and now, here it was. Happening.

you did as you were told, kneeling in front of the sofa where johnny was. from this angle, you could see how harshly his chest was rising and falling, his breath quick and uncertain. it brought you a strange sense of satisfaction that you could fluster a special ops soldier so easily. you sat there expectantly, but johnny didn’t move. he just stared at you, almost the same way he’d stared at his dinner plate before digging in. his eyes traced the contours of your body, over your shoulders and down to your full chest, over your breasts and down to the plush of your stomach and thighs where they pressed against your dress.

“starin’ won’ make ‘er cum, johnny,” simon quipped. you drew in a sharp breath, glancing back over your shoulder at your husband. he clicked his tongue again, motioning back towards johnny. “ah-ah, keep your eyes on ‘im, precious. he needs y’r attention more’n I do.” you looked back up at johnny dutifully, your lips parting slightly as you waited for him to do something, anything. the fabric of the rug was biting into your knees, making you a tad uncomfortable. “she’s yer wife, simon, I cannae jus’-” “you can an’ you will,” simon interrupted. “the only way she gets any pleasure tonigh’ is by your hand, an’ I don’t let my wife go to bed unsatisfied.” you let out a whine at that, the stakes so much higher now that you knew the terms. johnny just had to touch you.

“steamin’ jesus,” the Scot cursed under his breath, your whine sending a spark of pleasure between his legs. he’d never heard a woman make that sound before, especially not at the prospect of being pleased by him. “i can touch ‘er?” he asked, but he didn’t look at simon for an answer. his stare was more intense, sizing you up, deciding which piece of you would be most juicy to sink his teeth into. simon hummed in amusement. “unless y’r bloody telekinetic, s’pose ya have to, don’ ya?” simon responded, shifting in his chair. you heard the zipper of his jeans go down and it was almost painful that you couldn’t look at him.

johnny reached forward, taking your chin in his thumb and forefinger. he stroked his thumb along your jaw, shuddering on his exhale. “y’r so soft,” he breathed out, marvelling at the beauty of you on your knees. you lean your head into his touch, following the pulls and pushes of his hand as he inspects you. “such a bonnie bird,” he cooed, spreading his legs and pulling you in closer to him. you shuffle forward, settling yourself more squarely between his knees.

“simon says ya suck cock like a dream. is he righ’?” johnny asked. you nod, leaning forward to mouth at his crotch through his jeans. you could feel how hard he was already from barely having touched you. instead of focusing on the fact that simon was going around blabbing about your blowjob skills, you chose to take in as much of johnny’s musk as you could through his pants. you couldn’t quite smell him, but there was the barest hint of his body wash peeking through.

simon had started stroking himself to the sight of both of you, the wet shlick reaching your ears and emboldening you. knowing that your husband was enjoying this ignited a fire that started in your core and spread through your veins. johnny got the same motivation, locking eyes with simon for only a moment before shoving his jeans and boxers down. you gasp at the suddenness of it, placing your hands on his bare thighs to steady yourself. before you can fully get your bearings, johnny grabs the back of your head and shoves you down.

he’s not as long as simon, but he’s certainly thicker. he fills your mouth almost instantly, your cheeks aching a little with the stretch. you and johnny moan in unison, your eyes fluttering shut as johnny’s hand balls up in your hair. simon chuckles behind you, his hand tightening around himself. “tha’s it, lad. fuck ‘er mouth good, she likes it a bit rough.”

johnny’s hips start thrusting, the ruddy tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat and making you gag. tears bead up in the corners of your eyes, whimpers and moans giving johnny some vibration as he fucks your throat. you applauded yourself for the decision not to wear mascara; cleaning the tears and spit from your face would be difficult enough. saliva dribbled down johnny’s length, wetting your lips as you hollowed your cheeks. the salt of him coated your tongue, precum leaking down your throat. above you, johnny was grunting and groaning like a rutting bull, thrusting into your mouth with abandon. “how’s my girl feel, johnny?” simon asked, his voice sounding strained. hearing just how affected they both were had your pussy dripping with arousal. “fuck, si, she’s…ah, so warm. fuckin’ milkin’ me.”

your tongue traced the protruding vein on the underside of johnny’s cock, delighting in the shudder you earned from him. it didn’t take long after that for him to finish down your throat. you swallowed every drop, taking in everything he offered. he was more bitter than simon, but you enjoyed it all the same. you pulled your mouth off of johnny’s cock with a wet pop, peeking up at him with heavy lidded eyes. the man you saw was not the man who’d sat across from you at dinner. he looked downright feral, grabbing you like a man possessed. he pulled you up from the floor, laying you out on the sofa and tugging your underwear down.

before johnny tossed them away, he held them to his nose, drinking in the smell of you. he groaned, balling the fabric up in his fists. “y’r bird smells like heav’n, l.t.,” he rasped, dropping the panties and fixing his wild gaze back on you. “bet she tastes even better.” without any further warning, he dipped his head between your thighs, thick tongue lapping up the moisture from your cunt. you squealed in surprise, throwing your head back against the cushions. simon bit back a curse behind his hand, watching his best friend devour his wife like his last meal. the mere thought was enough to make him spill all over his hand and stomach, his release silent so as not to distract johnny.

you didn’t think anything could. your thighs clamped around his head to keep him in place, but it was hardly necessary. even the rapture couldn’t pull him away from your pussy and the nectar that dripped from it. as much as you enjoyed the feeling, johnny wasn’t as coordinated as simon was. his tongue was wild, moving for his pleasure rather than yours. 

you twitched and moaned when he would happen to graze your clit, hoping that he’d get the hint, but he never did. there was no technique, no purpose. johnny came up for air, hazy eyes meeting yours. he was pussy-drunk, your juices shining on his lips and chin. he nosed at the inside of your plush thigh, sinking his teeth into the fat there. it stung and your back arched, reaching down to push his head away. the sting wasn’t pleasurable, not compared to his tongue against your cunt.

the moment simon caught the resistance from you, he was on his feet, yanking johnny back by his mohawk. the Scot gasped, back arching as simon held his hair tight in his fist. “easy, mutt,” simon growled in johnny’s ear, pushing his head down to look at you. “tha’s my girl, and y’r gonna treat ‘er with the respect she deserves. not some blushin’ virgin tha’s never had a woman, are ya?” johnny huffed, taking the question as an insult to his manhood. “‘course not,” he said, voice tense and strained. simon shook johnny’s head, then released his hair. “didn’ think so. remember y’r place, treat ‘er right.”

the scolding from simon had leveled johnny, forced him to slow down and think with his brain and not his cock. you twitched and whined as he paid more attention to your aching clit, swollen and puffy with desire. your hips bucked against your will, pressing against johnny’s tongue harder. 

finally, his tongue pushed inside you, caressing your walls. you clenched around him, tension building in your lower stomach. “don’t stop, fuck, don’t stop!” you begged, chest heaving. simon appeared at your side, stroking your hair. his gaze was soft, admiring, a welcome contrast to johnny’s. “cum on his tongue, love. he’s been waitin’ for it, not gonna stop ‘til he gets it.” those words were all it took to push you over the edge, shuddering and whining as johnny licked you through your orgasm.

you felt floaty after, the pleasure of having your husband’s best friend eat you out while your husband watched going straight to your head. there were cooed praises and kisses to your cheeks, but you weren’t entirely sure who they came from. hushed words were exchanged at your feet, then johnny was zipping himself up and kissing you goodbye. simon wrapped you in your favorite fuzzy blanket, the gentle sway of his gait soothing you as he carried you to the bedroom. once he’d laid you on the bed, he started to leave, but your soft hum and hand on his arm stopped him. “si? can we do that again?” you asked, voice soft and wrecked.

simon just chuckled, brushing your hair away from your face. “don’ you worry, lovie. he’s comin’ back for dinner next week.”

[violentdelights-violentendss]

Logan Going Into a Rut.

Would you guys like a part two? I could make a part two if you guys want….let me know how it is and please request a thousand more things I am eagerly awaiting your requests!!! (I am also working on the ones I already got!) I didn’t spell check this….

Pairing: Logan Howlett (Wolverine) x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: Logan goes into a rut earlier than he expected.

Logan had woken up that morning significantly earlier than he usually did. You were still sleeping peacefully next to him, entangled in the sheets you had stolen from him during the night. Logan didn’t mind too much, being always warm. But that morning, he felt even hotter than usual. He slid his hand against his bare chest, feeling it to be slick with sweat. He closed his eyes, massaging his temples, before he shook his morning drowsiness and confusion away, deciding he would not be able to sleep any longer. He walked to the bathroom, deciding to take a cold shower even if it was the heart of winter.

He wasn’t too mad about the early start, Charles having drowned him in a very extensive list of things to do, not counting the lessons he had to begrudgingly teach that afternoon. Logan stepped outside of the bathroom, fully clothed and ready for the day, even if he still felt a little drowsy. He chalked it up to having eaten too heavily the night before, maybe the digestion worsening his sleep.

He checked himself in the mirror, making sure he looked decent. He started heading towards the door of your room. Right before he left, he glanced at you, making sure you were still in deep sleep. Logan’s eyes froze on your figure: your sleeping shorts had slid up your body, revealing your thighs, and your braless tits hidden underneath the shirt you had stolen from him begged him to jump back into bed with you. He exhaled loudly. Logan gripped the door so tightly he thought his claws would come out. He needed to go work. He shook his head, cursing Charles as he shut the door behind him.

•

Logan had been running around the X mansion fulfilling various tasks, not noticing as the day slowly, and sluggishly slid forward. The gloominess of the morning left its place to the timid rays of the winter sun, that caressed his back as he finished fixing a broken kitchen cabinet. A multitude of students had already waltzed inside the kitchen, still half asleep. They had uttered a sleepy ‘good morning’, before they grabbed a little food. Logan grunted in response, too focused on the darn kitchen cabinet. The flow of students had significantly slower when he had managed to finally fix it.

Logan slammed down the screwdriver. “Fucking finally.” He closed and opened the cabinet a few times, smiling proudly when the cabinet door did not decide to dramatically clatter to the ground rather choosing to finally stay in place.

“What are you celebrating, baby?”

Your voice startled him, but he quickly turned around, a type of smile reserved for you only gracing his lips. “(Y/N).” You grinned back at him. “I managed to fix this darn cabinet door that someone, managed to detach in the dead of night.”

Your eyes glinted. “You have a gut feeling about who did it?”

“Definitely.” Logan replied, walking around the counter to hold your waist. “I woke up super early this morning.” He added. You pulled back from his chest, worry dancing in your eyes. ���No nothing serious, bub, I just think I ate a dinner that was too heavy.”

Your eyes relaxed, pushing up on your tiptoes to press a chaste kiss to your boyfriend’s lips. You were about to pull back when Logan suddenly deepened the kiss, darting his tongue in your mouth. You leaned back into the kiss, letting yourself be pulled by Logan’s large, warm hands on your waist. The man grunted into the kiss, his body starting to tingle on fire, desire coursing through your veins. The way he was pulling you close seemed desperate, as if he needed you to breathe.

You gasped in shock when his hands slid onto your waist and pressed you against his crotch, feeling his already erected cock. “Already hard?” You whispered, looking down at the evident bulge in his pants. Logan pushed you against the counter, caging you against it. His chest heaved frantically.

“No idea, darling. You’re making me go crazy today.” He whispered, before he dove back into the kiss. You fully lost yourself in it, knowing the kitchen was pretty much deserted at this point in time. He pressed into the kiss, his tongue caressing your mouth, desire making his chest burn incandescently. Your eyes fluttered shut, letting your hands roam on his large back, his scent making your eyes roll to the back of your head.

You were about to suggest moving it to the bedroom when Logan suddenly pulled back, pressing his crotch tightly against yours and caging you tightly against his chest. You glanced up at him, worried something happened when you noticed his legs were quivering. A moan erupted from his lips, and his hips thrusted against yours. “(Y/N), oh my god!” He grunted. You didn’t know what was happening till you felt wetness from Logan’s crotch, seeping into your leggings, as his head was thrown back, and he panted loudly.

“Did…Logan did you cum?” You asked, startled: he usually lasted more than a few rounds. His endurance was crazy. Logan’s eyes fluttered open, lust blowing his pupils wide. He slowly looked at you, disbelief clearly evident on his face. You tentatively bucked your hips, watching as he shivered.

“I think…” Logan swallowed, reaching his hand to feel his crotch. “My rut might be coming early.” He closed his eyes, cursing himself: the sweat, the ever present arousal, the shitty sleep…it was all there. Your eyes widened, shooting down to the clear stain on his light blue pants, and the evident bulge that was already growing again.

“Fuck, today is not the day for that.” You cursed.

“What, why?” Logan asked, grunting when he felt the head of his cock press against the seam of his jeans. Why did he decide to go commando today of all days.

“I have that overnight field trip with my students! I can’t bail last minute.” You cried, your eyes widening. Logan’s face contorted into a grimace of pain, a curse rolling out of his mouth, as he realized this day would suck. A lot. He would have to spend the day locked in your room, rutting against your panties to try and feel any sort of momentary solace. But he knew you could not desert your students just like that. Even if he acted all gruff and scary, he knew what caring for students meant, and he would not rip their favorite teacher away from them, especially during a field trip that was only supposed to be joyful.

He caressed your cheeks. “It’s gonna be alright, baby. I’ll figure it out.” He lied through his teeth, already feeling his skin starting to burn and itch with almost irresistible lust.

You glared back at him. “No, it’s not fine and we both know it. You know what, I’ll come back tonight. I won’t stay overnight. How does that sound, baby? Huh?” You asked, pulling against his shirt to try and get him to concentrate through the daze of lust that was already taking over.

Logan nodded, his head spinning. “Yeah, that would be great, love.” He whispered. You moved against him, trying to reach your phone to check the time, your knee gliding against his bulge. “Fuck!” Logan croaked, throwing his head back.

You locked your phone, glancing up at him. “Logan, baby, I still have 10 minutes. What can I do?” You asked, caressing his chest.

Before he replied, Logan gently grabbed your arm, dragging the both of you inside the supply closet, and locking the door behind you.

Safely inside, Logan closed his eyes, trying to look past his primal instincts, and deem what would be the best course of action. Objectively, fucking you would keep him satisfied the longest, but there wasn’t time in 10 minutes. He discarded his rationality, fully relying on his animal instincts, knowing what they desired in the moment would keep him satisfied the most. “This…might be weird, baby, but I just need to rut against you, please.” His voice was heavy with need.

“Baby, I’m here. I’m here for everything.” You reassured him, spreading your legs, letting Logan position his crotch right in between, were he needed to be. He wrapped his arms around you, holding you still as he started to thrust against you. His face soon contorting in a grimace of pleasure, even a drop of drool sliding down the side of his mouth.

Your hands raked Logan’s back underneath his shirt, letting him feel your skin on his. His beautiful eyes slid open, his gaze landing on your tits, that bounced delicately with every trust. “Your tits, babygirl…need to see them.” Logan whispered in your ear. You pressed an open mouthed kiss to his neck before you unzipped your jacket, revealing your light tank top underneath: you were going out with your students to a nature park, you needed to be sporty.

You reached for your neckline, feeling Logan’s hand wrap around yours to yank your tits out faster. When they were right in front of his eyes, Logan mewled loudly, leaning down to kiss you fervently as his hips started to jackhammer faster.

Somehow, even in the daze of his lust, Logan had managed to perfectly align his tip with your clit, making you see stars. Your moans quickly started mingling with his. His large hands reached your left thigh, hoisting it up to wrap around his waist. “Right - nghh - there! Logan!” You cried, hearing your boyfriend’s quiet pants fill your ears.

“Gonna make me cum in my pants again. God, you turn me into a horny teenager.” He murmured, his rhythm slowing down for a second before it started picking up again.

Your phone buzzed, showing you the time. “Logan…I need to go soon!” You whimpered, threading your hands through his hair.

“I’m close.” He reassured you, his lidded eyes landing on your jiggling tits. They dragged a broken moan out of his lips. Logan was only ever this loud when he was experiencing his rut. “Are you?” You nodded quickly.

The knot in your stomach had been tightening for a while, and reacted the second it was called to attention. You wrapped your arms tightly around Logan, pressing him against you, practically shoving his face in between your breasts. “Logan!” You cried, throwing your head back, as the thigh he was holding quivered in his hand, orgasming powerfully.

The sudden surge of the smell of your arousal made Logan go crazy, sighing against your tits before he pulled back. He stopped for a second, even if he was close. You watched him, dazed, still descending from your high. Through your tired eyes and panting chest, you watched as Logan hastily unbuckled his belt and unzipped his jeans pulling out his cock. He quickly placed his leaking cock in between your legs, and you had the reflex to shut your thighs to allow him a little more pleasure.

“Fuck. I could fuck you for hours!” He whispered, starting to move his hips as quickly as he could. You leaned forward, licking a strip up his neck, landing on a spot you knew sent him crazy and gently nibbling on it. Logan’s eyes rolled to the back of his head, the sensation of your leggings against his sensitive tip, and your delicate teeth against his neck finally pushing him to the edge.

The orgasm was so powerful he didn’t even have time to warn you. His hips just sped up, his voice ripped away from the pleasure. He didn’t even manage to utter your name, just gripping your waist with his fingers. His mouth snapped open when he felt his orgasm reach him. Logan’s claws sprung out of his hands, puncturing two bags of rice that were placed on the shelves you were pressed against. Just as the rice started tumbling to the ground, Logan cummed, distinctly hearing his cum splatter on the floor.

Your boyfriend slumped against you, his claws retracting, his thighs shivering. You caressed his back, pressing soft kisses against his neck. “You did so well, baby.” You cooed, moving your hands to massage his head. Logan nodded, spent.

Your phone buzzed again, your students asking where you were. You cursed, hastily pulling your shirt back up and zipping your jacket. You clasped Logan’s jawline, forcing him to look at you through his post-orgasm daze. “I’m going to come back as soon as I can. Love you so much, baby.” You whispered, pressing your forehead against him.

Logan’s hands ran down to your waist, dragging you into a kiss. Your bodies melted together, your arms wrapping around his shoulders and yanking him closer. Not even a piece of paper could have fit through you. You pulled back, eyeing the string of saliva connecting you. “If we keep going like this, a bigger pool of cum will be on the floor.” You whispered, starting to head towards the door.

Logan grinned, lazily passing his hand through his hair. “Go, have fun. I’ll clean up here. I’ll be waiting for you tonight.” His eyes glinted with an erotic promise. You grinned, blowing a flying kiss. Logan watched the door close behind you, pulling his jeans back up and hastily disinfecting the floor.

He walked outside, quickly going to inform Charles he would be off today before he headed back to the room. He could still feel his buzzing desire for you deep inside his skin, but he felt somewhat satisfied as he threw his shirt on the floor, letting himself fall on the bed. Logan moved on his side, trying to get some sleep to get a break from his lust, but as he adjusted himself on the mattress, his eyes landed on the dirty panties you had accidentally forgotten on the ground. Your scent reached his sensitive nose, drugging him immediately.

Logan glanced down towards his crotch. He was hard again. “Fuck!” He yelled, falling back down on the bed, exasperated. It would be a long, long, day.

[sucodelaranja86]

- i'm sorry ( part 2 ) : ★

featuring: hyun-ju cho x reader.

summary: you finally get things solved with your girlfriend. But now, your only option is to wait for the rest of these deadly games to end. Either by player's choice, or naturally.

A/N: I am so excited, i can't wait to write part 3, tho i am going to take a bit longer to write it. And spoilers: young mi lives!! :DD i can't bear to kill her cute aah

★ . ★ . ★ . ★

➤ What you could swear that was gasps of sunlight penetrated your eyelids, manifesting an uncomfortable feeling agaisnt your body. The artificial lights of the massive dormitory were unfortunately turned on, and a feminine voice from the speakers annouced it was time to wake up, signaling the approaching next game. You had barely survived the second one, your team winning with only a few seconds left. Hyun-ju didn't want and didn't bother to invite you to her team (that surprisingly had many cheers during their turn playing.), leaving you with strangers that honestly had the same low capacity as you during the games.

You were not sure if she was worried for you the same way you were for her, but you could swear you saw a slightly relieved face when she saw you and other 4 people coming through the door back to the dorm. At least you hoped so.

But now that the worry was temporarily over, it left you with enough time to go back and wonder. What did you do wrong to upset her? She was in the game too, for her debts and for her surgeries. You were here with the sole purpose of helping her. Was she that selfish that she would leave you only for that?

You almost facepalmed yourself for even thinking that. She was mature, caring, and most of all, patient. You were just surprised to see her acting like this. After all, she always handled problems with a calm exterior. In a game that decided whether you would live or die based on your playing skills, everyone would lose a bit of their posture, right?

You had the theory that maybe she was worried for you! So worried that she couldn't help but get a bit hysterical, that's all! Maybe she is just desperate to get you out of danger and out of here.

But you shattered that theory yourself when you saw her voting for wanting to stay after the first game.

You were as confused as you could be. Seeing her talk so casually and friendly to most of her former team mates also did something to you. So she was not closing herself up with everyone because of the game, she was closing herself up with you.

-

Hyun-ju's head was an absolute mess. She involved you in this- she involved you in her problems. Again. First, you passed out from overworking yourself for her sake, and now, you were in this deadly game with the sole purpose to help her.

What did she do to deserve this? You didn't deserve her. You didn't deserve to drown yourself in debt and work because of her. You didn't deserve to risk your life for her. You deserved better. Much more than she could offer.

She unknowingly had pushed you away. You needed to get away from her- this was a problem she needed to solve herself. You should wait patiently at home, rest, have a good meal for once, and-

"Hyun-ju?"

. . .

Oh, you had her wrapped around your finger, didn't you?

"please, wait. Don't turn away from me."

As she was lost in her thoughts (not that you were much different), you had approached her. It was lunchtime, and the people she had been talking to were seemingly somewhere else- it was a perfect opportunity, and you couldn't miss this chance.

"Hyun-ju, can we please talk to each other as adults? I have been confused, all i need to know is why are you pushing me away-? I am your partner. I only wish the best for you, that is the purpose of me entering this competition-"

She didn't let you finish your statement as she responded in a way less aggressive tone than the first time you discussed.

"My- my love. I- i am at a loss for words. You shouldn't be here, this is an goal that is for me to reach. The fact that you are doing this for a reason such as me makes me feel... complicated feelings." she responded anxiously after some time.

"I feel angry, i feel saddened, i feel happy... But any of these feelings can't compare to the worry i am feeling."

You tried getting close to her and reaching out a hand, but the lingering feeling that she might not have completely forgiven you yet plagues your mind.

"Hyun-ju-"

"Please."

Your body is engulfed in a bone-crushing hug from her. You could feel your shoulder becoming wet through the fabric of your shirt. Tears, snot, saliva, anything that was worth of a cry was there.

"Please, tell me you will stop being so selfish, i want you to be safe, to be happy- your life shouldn't depend on medical modifications i plan to do on my body." Her voice was shaky as she loudly sniffed and sobbed.

"I don't wish for you to sacrifice anything else for me- i just want- i just want you."

At this point, you were already holding her on your lap and holding her face close to you neck as she sobbed, her entire body glued against yours. Despite her size, she was still your 'pretty, cute princess'.

"I'm sorry... Please- stick close to me. Don't leave my size ever again." She looked up from your shoulder and fixed her gaze straight to your eyes.

"I won't. We will go through this together. And when this all ends- we are going to Thailand. Like we planned. Alright?" You gave her a comforting kiss on her forehead as you promised.

At least, you hoped so.

￣ ￣ ￣ ￣

[starmocha]

but grandma i love him! (and him and him and him and him) [Sylus/Reader, Xavier/Reader, Rafayel/Reader, Caleb/Reader, Zayne/Reader ★ 2808 words ★ Masterlist ★ Series Index ★ AO3] 5 times Grandma Josephine meets your boyfriend + 1 time she meets your boyfriends. Or: AU where everything is the exact same, but Grandma Josephine lives, but wishes she didn’t so she doesn’t have to know how much of a hoe her granddaughter is. A/N: I wrote most of this, days before Sylus’ myth dropped as a way to cope with the impending and inevitable pain (and oh, was there so much pain with his myth…). I suddenly remembered this a month later, so I rushed to finish it before Caleb comes home again. This is very, very silly and full-on crackhead energy :’) Tag list: @miudle @alfredosaws @nezukoo-channn @voidsylus @rose-tinted-kalopsia @valkyyriia @lavlynyan 【 request to be added 】

Josephine had lived a long life, far longer than she would have anticipated for herself. When one lived as long as she had, mistakes were made and regrets inevitable. That was just life.

She knew that, of course, having pocketed many pearls of wisdom as she had navigated this long road, but that still did not make her feel any less foolish for her recent mistake.

It had seemed so innocent. So pedestrian, really.

How could she have realized that asking to meet her granddaughter’s boyfriend would be one of her greatest mistakes and biggest regret of her life?

one.

“Grandma, this is…Skye,” you said with a forced smile as you gestured to your partner.

‘Skye’ stifled his chuckle and extended a hand to the elderly woman. “It is a pleasure to meet you, Miss Josephine,” he said politely with a charming smile, “Your granddaughter talks fondly about you.”

Josephine smiled in delight, never imagining her granddaughter would bring home a very attractive man. It was like she was looking at a work of art created by God Himself. She shook the young man’s hand happily. “Come in, come in, dinner is ready. We can chat as we eat.”

As dinner progressed, the conversation remained lively. This Skye certainly had a way with his words, his charisma was so radiantly brilliant. Josephine had also never seen her granddaughter as happy as she looked now, noticing how the two would often share sweet whispered secrets when they both thought the old woman wasn’t watching.

Oh, youth, Josephine observed with wistful envy.

After dinner, Josephine left her granddaughter alone in the kitchen to do the dishes as she went to her bedroom to retrieve a family photo album to reminisce over. Along the way, she unwittingly walked in on Skye having a private conversation on the phone in the hallway. She was about to turn away before he noticed when she paused, hearing a peculiar comment from Skye:

“Hm, so they had thought I would be there to be ambushed, did they?”

Ambushed? Josephine furrowed her brows in concern.

“Never mind, I trust you and Luke had taken care of things, correct?”

Taken care? Josephine went pale.

“Hm, they should know that Onychinus does not take betrayal so kindly.”

Motherfucking Onychinus?!

Josephine immediately raced back to the kitchen, not noticing ‘Skye’s’ amused smirk.

You were just finishing the last of the dishes when Josephine grabbed you by the shoulders, shaking you immediately and making you nearly dropped the plate you were holding.

“Dear, you have to break up with that man!”

You stared wide-eyed, feeling completely blindsided. “B-but why? I thought you liked Skye, Grandma!”

Josephine looked at you nervously, swallowing slowly before she spoke in a hushed tone, “Dear, I…I just heard him having a conversation…I…I think he’s part of…that notorious group…Onychinus.”

“Oh,” you said flatly.

Josephine stared, confused. “‘Oh’?” she echoed back, flabbergasted. “Dear, I don’t think you understand. Onychinus is a very dangerous group.”

“Uh, yeah, dangerous,” you agreed, tone flat. “Super dangerous…”

Josephine started to get annoyed, not understanding why you were behaving so flippantly about this bombshell news she had just dropped. “Dear, Onychinus is wanted for many crimes. Its leader—”

“Sylus,” you said.

“Right—wait, you know his name?”

“She should.” Josephine heard ‘Skye’s’ deep, smooth voice as he stepped back into the kitchen. “She is dating him.”

Josephine felt like her brain had just short-circuited as she watched this man walked over and leaned down to kiss her granddaughter on the lips.

“Did you even try to be discreet?” You scolded Sylus with a frown after he pulled away.

He chuckled and shook his head. “I saw her from the side,” he admitted, adding, “And I don’t like being kept a secret so…”

“You—mmph!” Sylus immediately kissed you again before you could scold him.

Josephine watched this exchange uncomfortably, feeling like she was having an out-of-body experience as her brain tried to comprehend that her sweet granddaughter, one of the top hunters in Linkon City, was in a relationship with a notorious wanted crime boss.

“I…I need some tea…” she managed after a pause.

“Oh, I’ll make some for you, Grandma!” You pulled away from Sylus immediately, rushing to the cabinet.

At that moment, Sylus’ phone rang. He took a glance at the screen and apologized. “Sorry, I have to take this call.”

Once he was out of the room, Josephine immediately rushed over to you, pulling you to the side. “Dear, do you realize what you are doing?”

“…making tea?”

“Don’t get wise with me, young lady,” she chided you instantly with a strong glare, “You know what I am talking about.”

“…Sylus?”

“Haven’t you thought about how problematic this relationship could be?”

“He does have a strange obsession with crows…”

Josephine looked bewildered. “What does that mean—never mind, I meant that he’s a felon!”

“A little bit, yeah…”

“Dear, is dating a criminal your way of getting back at me for not getting you that pony when you were eight?”

“N-no! Of course not!” You protested. “Besides, Sylus also has this amazing horse, although if I have to be honest, I prefer riding Sylus—”

Josephine had decided that was the perfect moment to black out.

“…motorcycle?! Grandma?!”

two.

Grandma, I have someone I would like you to meet! :)

Josephine felt relief when she had seen that text message her granddaughter had sent. It seemed Sylus was no longer in the picture, she thought, a little worried about any repercussion that could come from splitting with a dangerous crime boss.

As she glanced at the message again, the little smiley face at the end of the sentence calmed the old woman instantly. There was probably nothing to worry about. You seemed pleasant. Cheerful, even.

This was a good sign.

The following Saturday afternoon, Josephine was positively thrilled to meet her granddaughter’s new boyfriend, Xavier. She was immediately charmed by his princely appearance and soft-spoken and polite way of speaking. He truly looked like he had stepped out of a fairy tale.

After introductions were made, you had excused yourself from the group after receiving an urgent phone call from Tara. The other woman was in such an overly anxious state, ranting something about her cat? It took you nearly ten minutes to finally calm your friend before you were able to hang up and return to the group.

Stepping into the living room, you were surprised to see only your grandmother sitting in her chair. You furrowed your brows, feeling a strange knot forming in your stomach. Nervously, you stepped over to your grandmother.

“Wait, where’s Xavier?”

Josephine smiled. “In the kitchen,” she answered, not noticing your face was paling. “He mentioned he wanted to heat up the dish you both brought over in the oven—”

“In the oven?!”

“Yes, the oven—”

The fire alarm blared as dark thick smokes billowed from the kitchen, but thanks to the bravery and promptness of the men and women of Linkon FD, the fire was put out in less than fifteen minutes.

Josephine remained in her chair, face covered in soot, her voice peculiarly neutral. “Dear…”

“Insurance will cover this, don’t worry, and if not, I will buy you a new—”

“I don’t even like tuna casserole.”

“I told you we should have made chicken potpie.”

“Xavier—that’s…that’s not the issue…”

three.

When her granddaughter mentioned bringing an artist over, Josephine had some doubts. She worried about her granddaughter having to support a struggling artist until he could make a name for himself, but even if she did voice her concern, it would most likely have the opposite effect and just make that man seem even more desirable in her granddaughter’s eyes.

It wouldn’t do. She didn’t want to meddle, but she hoped things would just naturally end on its own terms.

Her worries instantly disappeared when her granddaughter sent her a photo of the young couple at an art exhibition. Josephine’s eyes caught the name of the artist as well as the face of the young man with his arm around her granddaughter’s waist in the photo.

Wait.

Rafayel.

This was The Rafayel.

As old as she was, Josephine kept up with the news. She recognized both the name and the face of the artist. She laughed heartily to herself, tickled that her pretty granddaughter managed to catch the eyes of a well-known artist such as Rafayel.

Her worries eased, knowing her granddaughter had just secured her future being entwined with someone as successful as Rafayel. She immediately started planning a wedding. Maybe even a guest nursery in her home for when the happy couple would visit with hopefully numerous great-grandchildren.

From this moment all the way to the next Sunday for brunch, the old woman had an extra pep in her steps. As she exited a taxi, Josephine found herself at a well-known restaurant, popular with brunch for the younger crowd. It was typically packed and hard to get in, but Josephine supposed someone as influential as Rafayel would have no problem securing a table.

“Grandma, over here!” you rushed over to hug your grandmother. After kissing her cheek, you sighed playfully, “You know Rafayel and I offered to pick you up. You didn’t have to take a taxi.”

“Nonsense, an old woman like me is perfectly capable of getting around by herself,” she chided you gently. She patted your hand reassuringly as you both walked arm linked into the restaurant. “This is so exciting, darling. I have been looking forward to meeting Rafayel all week long.”

“Wonderful!” you exclaimed, beaming, “He is really the sweetest, Grandma. You will love him. He gotten us a table outside. It really is beautiful out there.”

Well, Josephine can check off meeting a famous artist on her bucket list.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Miss Josephine,” Rafayel greeted the older woman with a charming smile. “I have heard so much about you from this cutie over here.”

“Ra-Rafayel,” you protested with a blush and then whispered harshly under your breath to him, “N-not in front of Grandma…”

He smiled, shrugging. “Sorry, cutie, force of habit.”

“You did it again…”

Josephine laughed and reassured her blushing granddaughter. “You two really are the cutest thing ever,” she said, smiling in gratitude as Rafayel helped seat the older woman.

The time passed with a lot of pleasantries and sharing stories over a delicious array of food. Smoked salmon, quiche, waffles, fruit salad, and bellinis filled three happy bellies. Just as Josephine was already planning on speed-dialing a wedding planner, she noticed Rafayel’s face did a complete 180.

“Rafayel? Are you alright, dear—”

“M-m-m-monster!”

“Excuse me?” Josephine glared when Rafayel pointed at her.

“N-no, Grandma, it’s not you,” you quickly protested, standing up and rushing to Rafayel when he stumbled out of his seat shaking in fear. “Rafayel, calm down! It’s just a—”

“Meow.”

“Oh!” Josephine laughed when an orange cat leapt onto the table, purring happily at the plate with some leftover smoked salmon. She laughed and started petting its head as the cat greedily licked the plate and ate the remaining morsels. “Where did you come from, little one?”

The cat purred happily amid Rafayel’s screams.

“Rafayel, ca-calm down!” You trailed after Rafayel as he backed away.

“Get that monster away from me!”

“Rafayel! Come back!”

Josephine sighed.

After filling its belly with some delicious salmon, the cat napped in the old woman’s lap, purring contently as its ear was scratched. At that moment, the waiter walked over and placed the bill in front of Josephine to her surprise.

“You have got to be kidding me,” she griped once she realized her granddaughter and Rafayel were both gone.

four.

“Oh, dear, I am so excited to meet this one,” Josephine said, meaning every single word, “The way you described him makes him sound like quite a catch.”

Tall, handsome, intelligent, and with the added bonus of being good in the kitchen! There was no way this one wouldn’t be a perfect match for her sweet, darling granddaughter, who, after all, deserved only the best in life.

You laughed. “Grandma, what are you talking about? You know him.”

Josephine blinked, confused. “…I do?”

“Yeah, it’s—”

“Where’s my favorite pipsqueak?”

You gasped as you felt an arm wrapped around your waist, easily lifting you up. You blushed. “Caleb!”

Josephine laughed. “Caleb, you didn’t tell me you were coming home to visit.”

Caleb looked confused as he settled you back down to the floor, but his arm remained wrapped around your waist. “I thought Pipsqueak mentioned it to you already?”

Josephine frowned. “I don’t believe so,” she said, adding, “But what bad timing, we’re having a guest tonight and—”

She paused, suddenly noticing how Caleb’s arm still remained wrapped around your waist and the way you leaned in close against him. You were all giggly and blushing like a schoolgirl.

“…and…”

“Um, Grandma,” You started feebly, “Caleb is my boyfriend.”

“No, he’s not.”

“Uh, yes, he is.”

“No, he’s not.”

“Grandma—”

“No, he’s not.”

“Caleb!”

“Gran, I—”

“I am taking a nap!” Josephine declared, determined to wake up from this surreal dream she was having.

“Caleb—”

“Shh,” he quietly shushed you. “Gran is taking a nap…”

You glared at him, sighing in defeat as Josephine sat in her chair, blanket over her lap, and she closed her eyes, cursing whatever deity who had decided she needed to deal with this weird-ass situation at her age.

five.

Josephine smiled serenely as she watched you and Zayne make dinner together in your kitchen.

Finally, a good man.

Zayne was always the sweetest little boy, and it pleased Josephine to see he had grown into a kind and caring man with a successful career and highly-respected reputation among his peers. Zayne had effortlessly ticked off every single box in Josephine’s list of criteria for a grandson-in-law: intelligent, kind, patient, respectful, charming, handsome, successful, loving. There was not a single flaw in this young man.

“My love, come taste this,” Zayne called out as he held up a wooden spoon.

Oh, my. Even Josephine couldn’t help but blushed and felt her heart fluttering at witnessing how sweetly affectionate Zayne was with you.

“What do you think?” he asked.

You pondered, licking your lips lightly. You smiled. “Maybe just a little more soy sauce?”

Zayne nodded. “Okay,” he said, “Could you grab the bottle for me then?”

“Of course, Zaddy—”

You froze.

Zayne froze.

Josephine stared.

“Za…Zaddy?” Josephine questioned from across the kitchen island.

“It’s…nothing,” Zayne said, his ears turning red, “Just a silly nickname.”

Josephine nodded, seemingly accepting his weak explanation. “How long until dinner is ready?”

You swallowed nervously and barely managed to rasp out: “An hour…maybe?”

“I’ll just take a quick nap if you two don’t mind—oh, don’t trouble yourself, dear.”

“Okay, Grandma, you can nap on my bed…” You said feebly, a little perplexed by how…calm she seemed.

Josephine nodded again and walked to your bedroom. She sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled out her phone, searching up ‘Zaddy’ online.

She wished she hadn’t.

+ one.

This was a dream.

A motherfucking dream.

And not even a good one.

Josephine stared at all of the tall, handsome men—and Caleb—towering behind her granddaughter.

“…Dear, I thought you were dating Zayne.” She glanced at the young doctor who looked away in embarrassment.

“I am,” you answered nonchalantly, confused by your grandmother’s behavior.

“…Didn’t you break up with these other young men—and Caleb?”

Caleb blinked.

“No,” you said slowly, “I didn’t want to bombard you with all of them at once, so…I staggered their introductions.”

“You’re…dating…five men…at the same time?”

“Grandma, you are acting like I am banging them all at the same time!”

“Dear, I am sorry, it’s just—”

“We’ve only done it once.”

“…Excuse me?”

“It’s actually harder to coordinate an orgy with everyone’s busy schedule,” you explained thoughtfully, not noticing Josephine’s horrified expression. You continued flippantly, “Zayne has so many surgeries lined up for the next three months. Then Rafayel has an upcoming art show he needs to prepare for, and Sylus—”

Josephine walked away in the middle of the conversation, heading to her bedroom, leaving you flabbergasted.

You looked behind you at your five boyfriends and they all shrugged and scratched their heads, just as lost as you were. Worried, you followed after her. “Grandma? Is something the matter—"

You panicked and shrieked.

“Zayne, Caleb! Grandma is smoking and drinking!”

Josephine mentally sighed as she sat in her bed, leaning back against some propped up pillows as she stared at the ceiling with a bottle of brandy resting on her chest.

Surely, dying in an explosion would be better than this fuckery, right?

[pbaz7]

AGAINST THE TIDE: PART NINE

paige x azzi

word count: 6.4k

A/N: Alright I’m feeling much better and I’m no longer losing my shit after CD said she wouldn’t call it an injury 🙂‍↕️. Here’s the next chapter! It’s a little rough at the beginning but just get through it trust me . Please leave live reacts if you can, I need a little extra motivation today 😭

—————————————————————————

October 2022

For weeks after their argument, Paige kept her word. She stayed true to her role as Azzi’s best friend and was there anytime the younger girl needed her, it didn’t matter what she was doing, she was there. She did make Azzi stop coming with her to physical therapy though, and Nika had stepped in to take her place. Physical therapy always got a little too intimate when they’d ask whoever accompanied Paige to push on her knee and Paige knew that she and Azzi couldn’t handle that right now. They still spent time together–Paige helping Azzi in the gym here and there, texting during the day, hanging out sporadically, studying–but everything had changed. There were clear lines now. They didn’t flirt, they didn’t touch in ways that meant anything more than friendship. It was as though they were back to where they started, but it was painfully different.

Paige had started hanging out more with Ice, the freshman who quickly became a source of amusement for her. Ice's humor was dry and a little corny, and Paige found herself genuinely laughing more than she had since her and Azzi ended things. If that’s what you would call it. But even with Ice’s company, there were still moments when she couldn’t help but think about Azzi. It wasn’t that she didn’t love their friendship now, but it didn’t fill the large space Azzi once occupied when they were clearly more than friends.

Ice leaned back in her chair, her expression one of pure disbelief. “That’s bullshit. I refuse to believe there was a point when you and Azzi didn’t like each other.”

Paige chuckled, shaking her head. “I swear, we couldn’t stand each other. Every little thing she did annoyed me and she hated me honestly.”

Ice raised an eyebrow, smirking. “And now look at you, a full-blown simp. How the tables have turned.”

Paige rolled her eyes, though a grin tugged at her lips. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up.”

“So how’d you two even get past that?” Ice asked, leaning forward with genuine curiosity. “Like, how’d you go from ‘can’t stand each other’ to…” she gestured vaguely, “this?”

Paige’s laugh softened, and she shrugged. “The gym, mostly. We kinda connected over basketball first. That was the one thing we could agree on. At first, we only talked about basketball—nothing else. But once we built a decent foundation of not wanting to kill each other every two seconds, we started hanging out more. It just…happened from there.”

Ice nodded thoughtfully, then shrugged. “Why don’t you just do that again this time then?”

Paige gave her a look. “We don’t need to build a foundation, Ice. She’s still my best friend.”

“Righttt,” Ice said, dragging out the word with heavy sarcasm. “Your best friend that you’re in love with, and you haven’t seen in like five days.”

Paige rolled her eyes again, though a faint blush crept up her cheeks. “We text.”

Ice snorted. “That’s not the same, and you know it.”

Paige shrugged again, a small smile playing on her lips. “It’s just… a little hard to be around each other sometimes now.”

Ice narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “Why?”

Paige didn’t answer, but the grin on her face grew wider, her expression practically glowing with unspoken thoughts.

Ice groaned, throwing her head back dramatically. “Ew, dude. You’re disgusting.”

Paige just laughed, grabbing a basketball nearby and bouncing it lightly off Ice’s arm. “Shut up.”

But as the laughter faded, Paige’s expression softened, her smile dimming into something more thoughtful. “Honestly though, Azzi just needs some space from me to figure things out, and I’m trying to give her that.”

Ice tilted her head, her curiosity piqued. “Space for what?”

Paige hesitated, her fingers idly spinning the basketball in her lap. She glanced away briefly before answering, her tone careful and measured. “She has a lot of internal things to figure out before she can even think about being with me. I realized it a while ago but I don’t know if she has.”

Ice’s brow furrowed, but she nodded slowly. “That sounds… rough.”

“It is,” Paige admitted, her voice quieter now. “But she’s worth it. So I’m giving her what she needs.”

Ice studied her for a moment, then leaned back with a small smile. “Damn P, you really love her, huh?”

Paige didn’t even flinch. She met Ice’s gaze, a soft but unwavering certainty in her eyes. “Yeah, I do.”

Ice smirked, her teasing tone returning. “You’re still a simp, though.”

Paige groaned, chucking the basketball at her again, though the grin tugging at her lips betrayed her. “Shut up, Ice.”

November 2022

The next month was much harder than Paige thought it would be. Between missing Azzi and being sidelined by her injury and not being able to start the season with the team, she felt like she was drowning most days. Basketball, her usual escape, was no longer an option. Instead, she found herself in the gym, not to work out but to just sit in the silence, wishing she could push her body for hours on end. But eventually she’d get too frustrated when all she could do was shoot a few flat footed shots and she'd just let herself cry in the empty gym until she didn’t have any more energy. Other times, she’d just sit in her car, staring ahead, trying to calm her thoughts. More than once, she ended up sick at the sight of the back seat—a painful reminder of what, and who, was missing.

Azzi wasn’t doing much better. She’d become a mirror of who Paige used to be, burying herself in the gym day and night, trying to outrun her thoughts. Paige was still there for her, though, which made Azzi feel like even more of an ass, having somebody as sweet as Paige, just waiting for her to get her shit together. When things were a little too hard and Azzi would come to her door with tear stained eyes in the middle of the night Paige always let her in, let her talk about whatever she needed to or just sleep. The first time it happened was a random Tuesday at 3am.

Azzi’s knocks were gentle and tentative at first but it was enough for Paige to stir, her mind still fuzzy from sleep as the knock came again, a little louder this time. She groggily threw off her blanket and shuffled to the door, blinking against the dim hallway light cascading from the bottom of the door.

When she opened it, Azzi stood there, her mascara streaked down her cheeks, her eyes red and swollen, as though the weight of the world had poured out of her. There were no words, no explanations, just a look that said everything, Paige didn’t ask, she just stepped aside, letting Azzi into the warmth of the room. Azzi’s shoulders were trembling, but she didn’t speak, her chest rising and falling in slow uneven breaths. Paige closed the door softly behind her, then walked back to her bed, sinking back into the mattress where Azzi now laid, holding one of Paige’s pillows close.

Paige reached over, draping her arm against Azzi’s torso as she pulled her closer but not quite cuddling her. Just enough to let Azzi know she wasn’t alone as Paige’s eyes fluttered shut drifting back to sleep.

After that night Paige couldn’t imagine not being there for Azzi, knowing what she was struggling with. But things weren’t the same. They didn’t text everyday anymore, and their hangouts had all but stopped after it became clear that they didn’t really know how to be just friends anymore. The space between them, once so easy to close, now felt like an endless stretch.

Azzi blamed herself for what happened between them. She was constantly fighting an internal battle that seemed like a losing game. One part of her knew exactly how she felt about Paige, knew she wanted the older girl more than anything. The other half was a constant pull against this thought process. The part of her brain that was telling her she wasn’t the type of person who takes risks like this, she didn’t gamble her future that she had worked so hard for. Constantly in her own ear telling herself she had every right to be scared.

Now, Paige sat alone in the empty gym, her legs stretched out in front of her, a basketball resting at her feet. She knew she couldn’t play much, just dribble around and shoot here and there, so she came here to think, to feel some semblance of peace. The quiet of the gym was comforting, even if it couldn’t heal what was broken, only Azzi could do that.

The sound of the door opening broke the silence. Paige glanced up to see Azzi standing there, her figure framed by the dim gym lights. Azzi paused, stuck in the doorway. The sight of Paige, lost in thought, felt all too familiar, stirring memories of another time they’d both hesitated to bridge the distance between them.

For a moment, neither of them spoke, both caught in a whirlwind of emotions and memories. Paige chuckled softly at the irony, breaking the tension, and nudged the ball with her foot, sending it rolling toward Azzi.

Azzi’s lips curved into a small smile as she stepped inside, picking up the ball. She hesitated again, glancing at Paige, before making her way over. She sat down beside her but left enough space between them to keep the air light, uncertain. Neither of them spoke right away, the quiet wrapping around them like a truce.

Paige was the first to break the silence, her voice cutting through the stillness. “You played like shit last game.”

Azzi blinked, then burst out laughing, the unexpectedness of Paige’s comment catching her off guard. “Shit is an understatement,” she admitted, shaking her head.

Paige smirked, leaning back slightly. “What’d you come here to work on?”

Azzi shrugged, a noncommittal gesture. “Anything, I guess.”

Paige hummed thoughtfully as she got to her feet, grabbing the ball. Ice’s words from October echoing in her mind now. She spun the ball between her hands, glancing at Azzi. “Why you been taking so long to shoot lately?”

Azzi crossed her arms, tilting her head. “The passes are all over the place,” she said simply. “I got used to you hitting me in stride so it’s a big adjustment.”

Paige paused, nodding as she processed Azzi’s words. There was a quiet understanding in the air—an acknowledgment of how much they relied on each other, on and off the court.

By now, Azzi had stood up, her eyes tracking the ball as Paige passed it casually between her hands. Paige grinned. “Let’s work on it.”

Azzi raised a brow, confused. “Work on what?”

Paige laughed, her grin widening. “I’m about to throw you some of the worst passes of your life, and you’re gonna work on shooting without taking too much time to adjust the ball.”

Azzi couldn’t help but laugh at that, shaking her head in disbelief. “You’re ridiculous,” she said, but her feet were already carrying her toward the court.

Before they began, Azzi paused and looked at Paige. “I miss you,” she said softly, her voice carrying the weight of everything left unsaid between them.

Paige’s expression softened, and a small, genuine smile spread across her face. “I miss you too, Az,” she replied, her tone equally tender. Then, without missing a beat, she threw Azzi an intentionally terrible pass, the ball veering off to the side.

Azzi barely managed to catch it, quickly gathering herself for the shot, but the ball clanged off the rim.

Paige smirked. “Not bad. Now do it faster and try making it next time.”

Azzi rolled her eyes but couldn’t fight the smile tugging at her lips. They fell into an easy rhythm after that, Paige throwing increasingly awful passes, and Azzi working to shoot without hesitation. Laughter echoed through the gym when the passes were too bad to catch, blending with the rhythmic sound of the ball hitting the hardwood.

For the first time in a long time, it felt like they were back in sync—no words needed, just the game and each other.

The rhythm they had fallen into was effortless, the sound of Azzi’s playlist flowing through the speakers now as they worked on her shot. Laughter occasionally filled the gym, the tension from the past weeks melting away with every pass and shot.

That is, until the music cut off, replaced by the ring of an incoming call.

Azzi, mid-dribble, glanced toward her phone sitting on the floor. “Can you check who it is?” she asked Paige, who was closer.

Paige hesitated for a moment before walking over. She glanced at the screen, the name flashing boldly. Her jaw tightened ever so slightly, but it was enough for Azzi to notice. Paige cleared her throat. “Somebody named Elle,” she said, her tone a little too neutral.

Azzi didn’t miss the shift in Paige’s posture or the way her eyes flicked away from the phone. She didn’t need Paige to say anything; she could see the wheels turning in her head.

“It’s not what you think, Paige,” Azzi said, her voice firm but gentle.

Paige shook her head, brushing it off with a forced smile. “No, Azzi, you don’t have to explain—”

“Paige,” Azzi cut her off, stepping closer. “She’s my partner for a project. That’s it.”

Paige looked down, her fingers grazing the edge of her shirt. “It’s fine if it was something else you know,” she said softly, though the words felt hollow even to her.

“No, it isn’t,” Azzi said firmly, her voice leaving no room for doubt in Paige’s mind. “It isn’t fine because I don’t want anybody else. I only want you, Paige. I’ve told you that, and I mean it.”

Paige’s shoulders sagged slightly, guilt flashing across her face. “I’m sorry,” she murmured. “I know it’s not really my place.”

Azzi stepped even closer, her eyes searching Paige’s. “It is your place,” she said, her voice softer now. “So you don’t need to apologize.”

Paige glanced at her, caught in the sincerity of Azzi’s gaze. The tension in the air softened, the weight between them shifting back into something warm and steady.

“Okay,” Paige finally said, her voice barely above a whisper.

Azzi nodded, giving her a small smile. “Good. Now come back over here—I’m not done getting used to these terrible passes.”

Paige chuckled despite herself, picking up the ball. And just like that, they found their rhythm again, though the words exchanged lingered, a quiet reassurance binding them closer.

After finishing up in the gym, both of them grabbed their things and headed out. Paige made her way toward her car, expecting Azzi to follow. But when she glanced over her shoulder, she noticed Azzi strolling casually along the sidewalk.

Paige frowned, stopping in her tracks. “What are you doing?” she called out.

Azzi glanced back with a small shrug. “I didn’t drive.”

Paige’s eyes widened in disbelief, a mix of offense and exasperation flashing across her face. “You thought I was going to let you walk?” she said, her tone incredulous.

Azzi chuckled but didn’t respond, her smile widening as Paige simply muttered, “Unbelievable.”

With a grin, Azzi turned and walked toward Paige’s car. Paige muttered under her breath the whole time, just loud enough for Azzi to hear. “She’s gotta be crazy. Can’t believe she thought I’d let her walk. Who does she think I am?”

When they reached the car, Paige yanked open the passenger door, motioning for Azzi to get in. Azzi stepped in with a laugh, and Paige shut the door with more force than necessary, her irritation over something so small almost comical.

By the time Paige slid into the driver’s seat, Azzi was grinning at her. “I miss how dramatic you are,” she teased, still laughing softly.

Paige shot her a glare as she started the car. “You give me a fucking headache Azzi,” she said, but there was no bite to her words.

When they arrived back at the dorms, Paige’s suite came up first. She slowed to a stop, slinging her bag over her shoulder and turning toward Azzi.

“Night,” Paige said, already halfway to the door.

Azzi nodded but didn’t keep walking. “Paige,” she called, her voice stopping Paige in her tracks.

Paige turned back, raising an eyebrow slightly, her curiosity piqued. “Yeah?”

Azzi hesitated for a moment, then smiled softly. “I’ve been thinking…can we maybe talk tomorrow?”

Paige blinked, her confusion evident, but she nodded. “Yeah… of course,” she said, her tone cautious.

Azzi’s smile widened a little , though she didn’t offer any explanation. “I’ll text you,” she said simply.

Paige gave her a small smile in return. “Okay. Goodnight, Az.”

“Goodnight, P,” Azzi replied, her voice quiet but warm as she turned to walk toward her own suite.

Paige lingered for a second, watching Azzi’s retreating figure, her mind swirling with questions. Finally, she shook her head and headed inside, her thoughts lingering on the way Azzi had looked at her just now.

…

The next day, around 1 PM, Paige’s phone buzzed with a text from Azzi.

💗: You hungry? Let’s grab some food

Paige smiled at the message, typing a quick reply.

P 💗: Yeah that works for me

It didn’t take long for Azzi to reply.

💗: We’re taking my car.

Paige frowned slightly, shooting back a quick question mark.

P 💗: ?

The response came almost immediately.

💗: I almost threw up in your car yesterday when Steve Lacy came on

Paige let out a loud laugh, immediately understanding what Azzi was referring to as she had her own struggles being in there sometimes. She shook her head, typing back with a smirk.

P 💗: That’s dramatic, even for you

Azzi’s reply was short but effective.

💗: Not taking any chances

Still chuckling, Paige grabbed her things, her mood lighter than it had been in days. Azzi always had a way of pulling her out of her head, even with something as simple as sending a few texts.

They sat down at a corner table, the comforting hum of the restaurant around them as they ate their Chipotle bowls. The familiar, easy chatter filled the space between them yesterday being what they needed to return to the natural rhythm of their friendship, the laughter, and the simple joy of each other's company.

But, as the conversation slowly died down, Azzi looked at Paige, her expression shifting slightly.

“I want us to start over,” Azzi said quietly, her voice soft but serious.

Paige blinked, furrowing her brow. “Start over? What do you mean?”

Azzi took a deep breath, clearly trying to find the right words. “I want us to try this again, but—” she paused, trying to make sure she found the right words. “I want us to do it the right way this time.”

Paige tilted her head, her confusion evident but her tone gentle with Azzi like always. “Azzi, what are you saying?”

Azzi’s gaze was unwavering as she leaned forward slightly, the space between them feeling more intimate. “I want us to date, Paige,” she said, her voice steady.

Paige’s eyebrows furrowed for a moment before a soft, teasing smile tugged at her lips. “So... you want to be my girlfriend now?”

Azzi hesitated, her fingers tapping gently against the edge of the table. “No…at least not yet,” she said, her voice calm but firm. “I want us to go on dates and test the waters. We did things the wrong way, and I want to fix it.”

Paige’s eyes softened as a slow smile began to form on her lips. She leaned forward slightly, clearly proud of Azzi. “Tell me more about it.”

Azzi smiled at the shift in Paige’s expression, the spark of curiosity now in her eyes. “We can go on dates,” Azzi continued, her voice steady as she outlined her plan she thought a lot about. “But I’m not going to let you kiss me until we have a few dates. And we’re not going to have sex for a while, or we’re going to at least try really hard not to. I want us to get to know each other as two people dating, not just best friends who happen to be doing this.”

Paige nodded, as she listened to her. She hadn’t expected Azzi to say something like this when she asked her to lunch today, but it made sense for her. It was a different approach, one that felt like it had the potential to be something more controlled. Something more grounded. Which is exactly what Azzi needed.

“So, where’s this coming from?” Paige asked, her voice low with curiosity but also a touch of tenderness. “I thought you were—”

Azzi cut her off, her gaze soft but unwavering. “Despite what you think, Paige,” she said quietly, “I’m in love with you. These past few weeks have done nothing but show me that. I’m still scared as hell, but I want to at least try.”

Paige swallowed, her heart beating a little faster at the sincerity in Azzi’s voice. She really hadn’t expected this, she expected Azzi to try to mend their friendship, try to get back to their usual routine of hanging out. But the more Paige thought about it she understood. Azzi was always so detailed and plan oriented. She always needed steps and checkpoints to ease her mind, to let her see the progress she was making.

“I’m not asking for anything,” Azzi continued, her voice a little shaky now that Paige hadn’t said much. “I just want to start fresh. I want us to really try.”

Paige leaned back slightly, her arms folded across her chest as she processed Azzi’s words. The weight of everything that had been said, everything that had been left unsaid, hung heavily in the air. She couldn’t help but hesitate, uncertainty creeping in despite the hope in her chest.

“How do I know you’re not just going to change your mind again?” Paige asked, her voice quiet. She wanted to believe Azzi, wanted to dive into this with her, but it was hard to shake that lingering fear of being hurt again.

Azzi didn’t flinch at the question. She just looked at Paige, with a calmness that her voice conveyed when she answered. “You don’t,” she said simply. “That’s the thing I had to get over. We don’t really know what’s going to happen. That’s been my fear this whole time. Not knowing. Not being in control of it. But we never know what’s going to happen at any point in life so.”

Paige’s gaze softened, and she nodded slowly, taking in what Azzi was saying. But Azzi wasn’t done, and she shifted slightly, her hands in her lap as she continued.

“I was talking to my mom the other day,” Azzi began, her voice quieter now, but still with a hint of vulnerability. “And she tried to make me laugh by asking who shat in my breakfast. But honestly, it just made me cry more than anything.”

Paige couldn’t help but chuckle, knowing exactly how Katie could be. “Figures,” she said with a soft smile, her heart lifting slightly at the mention of Azzi’s mom.

Azzi smiled too, but the smile was fleeting, and the seriousness returned quickly. “Yeah. But... I told her everything that’s been going on. All of it. How I feel about you. About us.” She paused, her fingers nervously twisting the hem of her shirt. “Some parts of the story shocked her, honestly. I thought she was going to yell at me, but she didn’t. She just listened.”

Paige’s eyes widened a little, a surprise settling in her chest. She hadn’t expected that. For Azzi to talk to her mom about them already? It was a huge step. It made her heart skip a little—an odd mix of pride and tenderness swelling inside her knowing Azzi had come out to her mom.

“How... how did it go?” Paige asked softly, unsure of how to phrase the question but needing to know. She could sense how much this conversation had meant to Azzi.

Azzi’s lips curved into a small, reassuring smile. “It was fine. Perfectly fine, actually,” she said, her voice steady now. “I thought it was going to be hard, but... she already kind of knew. I mean, she’s not blind. She said she could tell something was going on, especially with how much time you spend at our place whenever we’re on break. She thought it was pretty obvious.”

Paige blinked in surprise. She hadn’t thought Katie would pick up on that. “Really?”

Azzi nodded, her gaze soft but thoughtful. “Yeah. She’s always been good at reading me, even when I’m not saying anything. We were talking for a while after I explained everything... she said something that kinda struck a nerve.” Azzi’s voice lowered again, a little more humor to it. “She was explaining some stupid metaphor that I could never understand, and she said life is all about taking chances. Usually, the best ones—the ones that really matter—are the ones that scare us the most.”

Azzi’s eyes met Paige’s, and there was something raw, something real, in the way she looked at her. “And you scare the hell out of me, Paige,” she said quietly, her words filled with sincerity. “So that’s exactly why I can’t just let us pass by. I can’t keep living in the ‘what ifs.’ I’ve been too afraid, and I’m tired of being afraid.”

Finally, Paige let out a deep breath and reached across the table, her hand finding Azzi’s with a gentle squeeze. “I’m scared too,” Paige admitted softly.

Azzi’s eyes softened, and she squeezed Paige’s hand in return, her voice barely above a whisper. “I’m not asking for anything more than what I said. I just want to try, Paige. I want us to take it slow, to get to know each other again and see where it goes.”

Paige’s smile was small but genuine, her heart fluttering at the thought of what could be. “Okay. We’ll try,” she said, the words feeling right. “We’ll take it slow.”

Azzi’s smile mirrored hers, though it was still laced with vulnerability.

…

This is how, a few days later, Paige and Azzi were on their first date.

Azzi had initially tried to take the reins, attempting to plan every detail, but Paige quickly vetoed the idea, claiming she’d been waiting for months to make this happen. Azzi didn’t even try to argue with that logic.

Now, they were on their way to a mystery destination Paige refused to disclose, with music filling the car. The ride was easy, lighthearted, and full of laughter—until Azzi reached out and skipped another Steve Lacy song.

Paige couldn’t help but laugh, glancing over at her. “What? Are we never listening to the album again?”

Azzi shot her a glare but couldn’t entirely hide the amused glint in her eyes. “Not for a long time, we’re not,” she retorted firmly, her voice dripping with mocking distress.

Paige only chuckled as they pulled into a parking lot. Azzi’s curiosity grew as she turned her attention ahead, her brow furrowing slightly until recognition dawned. Her lips curved into a wide grin.

“You brought me to the fair?” she asked, her voice tinged with excitement.

Paige glanced at her, her own smile soft but proud. “Yeah. Dinner’s boring,” she said simply, shrugging as if it was the most obvious decision in the world.

Azzi laughed, her eyes sparkling as she shook her head. “Of course you’d think that.”

Paige leaned back in her seat, looking out at the glowing lights of the fairground. “Come on, big head,” she said, unbuckling her seatbelt.

…

Their date was going amazingly. Azzi, naturally, made Paige get her a funnel cake, ignoring Paige’s protests as she tore off a piece and practically forced it into Paige’s mouth. Paige grumbled but couldn’t hide the smile tugging at her lips.

As the night went on, it became obvious that Paige was annoyingly good at everything. Every time Azzi swore Paige was about to lose a game, Paige proved her wrong. Neither of them wanted any of the prizes, so Paige made a habit of giving them away, handing stuffed animals and trinkets to random kids. The two of them would watch as the kids ran off, bouncing with excitement, leaving Azzi shaking her head at how effortlessly charming Paige could be with all ages.

Now, they were strolling through the fair, Paige’s arm casually draped over Azzi’s shoulder while Azzi leaned into her side, the warmth of the moment wrapping around them like the glowing lights of the fairground. But their quiet bubble burst when a small fan recognized Paige.

The fan approached cautiously, smiling nervously. “Hey, Paige, can I get a quick picture?”

Paige offered a warm smile. “Of course.”

After the fan snapped a picture with Paige, they hesitated before turning to Azzi. “Um, can I get one with you too Azzi?”

Azzi blinked in surprise before smiling and nodding. “Sure.”

Once the pictures were taken and the fan left with a cheerful wave, Paige’s attention shifted, her eyes catching sight of something in the distance. “Oh my god,” she muttered, her face lighting up as she grabbed Azzi’s hand.

“What?” Azzi asked, laughing at Paige’s sudden enthusiasm.

Paige didn’t answer, pulling her toward the basketball booth, where a massive Olaf stuffed animal sat on display. “It’s too good to be true,” she said, practically bouncing with excitement.

When they reached the booth, Paige handed the worker some tickets. He explained the rules, telling her she needed to make three out of five shots to win. Paige nodded and stepped up to the line drawn on the concrete.

But the worker held up a hand. “Nah, I know who you are. You gotta scoot back,” he said with a grin.

Paige laughed, stepping back as Azzi chuckled beside her. “Uh oh, the pressures on now,” Azzi teased.

Paige made the first four shots with ridiculous ease, defying the odds of the notoriously rigged carnival game. As she took her time with each shot a small crowd had gathered to watch her, but Paige was unfazed.

The worker let her take the fifth shot just for fun, even though she’d already won. Azzi, standing to the side, couldn’t resist teasing her. “You’re such a show-off,” she said, crossing her arms with a smirk.

Paige, knowing full well Azzi secretly loved it, grinned as she lined up the last shot. Without breaking eye contact with Azzi, she released the ball. The ball going in.

Azzi rolled her eyes, shaking her head with a laugh. “You’re irritating.”

Paige strolled over to the worker, who handed her the massive Olaf. Without hesitation, Paige turned and placed it into Azzi’s arms.

“This one’s yours,” Paige said with a confident grin.

Azzi looked down at the stuffed Olaf and then back at Paige, her expression softening. “You’re cute, you know that?”

Paige just smiled at her, as she felt a tap on her lower back seeing a little girl with a huge smile on her face.

After Paige and Azzi finished taking pictures with a few fans who had crowded around to watch Paige play the game, she and Azzi resumed walking through the fairground, their steps in sync. Paige’s arm once again draped casually over Azzi’s shoulder, the familiar, comforting ease of their connection returning.

They walked in silence for a few moments, but the air between them was full of understanding. They didn’t need to fill every moment with words—just the presence of each other was enough.

When they reached the car, Paige opened the door for Azzi like always. Azzi smiled, appreciating the gesture every time Paige does it, before sliding into the passenger seat. Paige walked around the front of the car, slipping into the driver’s side. She took a moment to glance over at Azzi, who was still holding the Olaf stuffie, her eyes soft but smiling.

Paige gave a small smirk as she started the engine, teasing, “You’re actually keeping it, huh?”

Azzi rolled her eyes playfully, adjusting the stuffed Olaf on her lap. “Yes, it’s Olaf. I’m keeping it.”

Paige laughed, shaking her head as she pulled out of the parking lot. The soft hum of the engine filled the silence between them as they drove off towards UConn, the glow of the fair behind them, leaving only the warmth of the moment to hold onto.

…

Long after Paige had “dropped” Azzi off following their first date, she found herself wandering into the gym. She wasn’t entirely sure why, but something about the court always drew her in. Spotting Azzi on the court dribbling, Paige couldn’t help but chuckle softly to herself.

Azzi noticed her almost immediately, stopping mid-dribble with a smile. “What are you doing here?”

Paige smirked, walking further onto the court. “I could ask you the same thing.”

Azzi shrugged as Paige closed the distance, casually swatting the ball out of her hand. Azzi laughed, shaking her head. “Ah, there’s my annoying best friend.”

Paige laughed along, saying. “Ahh, so I’m ‘best friend Paige’ right now, huh?”

Azzi nodded, still grinning.

Paige raised an eyebrow, tilting her head dramatically. “Okay then, tell me something. I heard you went on a date tonight.”

Azzi chuckled at Paige’s antics, her laughter light and easy. “I did.”

Paige dribbled the ball a few times, casually lining up a close-range shot. “How was it?”

Azzi tilted her head, pretending to consider it. “Ehh I was a little nervous at first, but I actually loved it.”

Paige glanced at her with a playful smirk. “Nervous? Why were you nervous?”

Azzi’s gaze softened as she shrugged, her voice quieter. “You know why.”

Paige arched an eyebrow, her voice teasing. “Humor me.”

Instead of answering directly, Azzi pivoted the conversation. “I went on some dates when we weren’t talking, like you suggested.”

Paige paused mid-dribble, her curiosity piqued. “You did?”

Azzi nodded, fidgeting with her hands. “Yeah... with girls.”

Paige hummed at this as she resumed dribbling, her voice casual but interested. “How were they?”

Azzi shrugged, her expression thoughtful. “They were okay. It’s not like I was trying to figure out feelings for them... more so to figure out myself.”

Paige nodded, her gaze softening with a soft smile. “And?”

Azzi smiled faintly, her tone more serious now. “They helped. The conversation with my mom I was telling you about? A whole lot easier after that.”

Paige paused her dribbling to smile at Azzi, her voice full of warmth. “I’m proud of you, Az.”

Azzi’s lips curled into a small, grateful smile, the sincerity of Paige’s words lingering in the air.

Azzi met Paige’s gaze, her tone playful yet sincere. “There’s a little more attention that comes with going on a date with Connecticut’s version of Jesus though.”

Paige burst out laughing, tossing the ball softly at Azzi, who caught it with a grin.

Azzi continued, her voice shifting to something more serious. “I was nervous at first because I knew people would recognize us—mostly you. It’s a lot of extra attention.”

Paige nodded, her grin slowly growing as she listened.

Azzi tilted her head, narrowing her eyes. “What? Why are you smiling like that?”

Paige leaned casually against the wall, her grin turning a bit smug. “You know I picked the fair on purpose, right?”

Azzi’s brows furrowed. “No...”

Paige smirked, folding her arms. “It’s far enough from campus that we wouldn’t be recognized as much, but it’s also a Thursday, which means there weren’t going to be a lot of teenagers or people our age there. Just a bunch of kids with their parents or older people. People our age would usually go on Fridays or Saturdays.”

Azzi blinked, processing the thoughtfulness behind Paige’s planning.

Paige stepped closer, her voice softening. “I picked today because I knew anyone who approached us would either be a super-excited kid or an old-school basketball fan who wouldn’t care why it was just the two of us there together. I wanted it to be... easier for you.”

Azzi was stunned, her lips parting slightly as she stared at Paige. “You really thought that far ahead?”

Paige shrugged with a casual air, though her gaze was warm. “I know you, Az. I know how hard this is for you.”

Azzi laughed, her tone light again as she tried to hide how much Paige’s words meant to her. “If you knew what I was struggling with the whole time, why’d you let me make it seem like basketball was the only thing stopping me?”

Paige’s smile softened, her voice dropping just enough to convey her sincerity. “Because I needed to give you time. It’s not a realization someone else can process for you.”

The air between them shifted as Paige leaned casually against the wall, her height slightly towering over Azzi with the way they were standing. The space between them grew smaller without either of them noticing.

Azzi tilted her head up to look at Paige, her expression soft. “I miss your eyes,” she said quietly, almost as if the words slipped out without her permission.

Paige chuckled, the sound warm and familiar. “That’s always the first thing you say to me.” Her grin widened, teasing but fond.

Azzi didn’t bother denying it, her gaze unwavering. The weight of her words lingered in the air, pulling them closer in a way that had nothing to do with proximity.

After a moment, Azzi whispered, her tone playful but with a hint of nervousness, “I’m not letting you kiss me.”

Paige’s toothy grin grew, her confidence shining through. “That’s fine.” Her voice was low, carrying just enough to make Azzi’s breath hitch.

But Paige didn’t move away. She stayed close, her presence overwhelming yet comforting, as she just took in Azzi standing in front of her.

Azzi didn’t respond, her lips quirking up just slightly. Instead, she shook her head with a quiet laugh, looking away but refusing to step back.

Paige finally stepped back, breaking the tension with a soft laugh. The sound lingered in the air, as she picked up a basketball and started dribbling casually.

Azzi rolled her eyes, grabbing her bag muttering, “I’m leaving.”

Paige’s laugh grew louder as she called after her, “See you later, princess!”

Azzi didn’t stop or turn around, but a faint smile spread across her face. She lifted her hand and stuck her middle finger up in response, a playful gesture that made Paige laugh even harder as Azzi walked out of the gym.

[celestiamour]

Hi, Could you write more about semi x fem reader, maybe the reader helps her not to get murdered? I love semi a lot but there aren't many fanfics about her🥺😭 please

ft. se-mi x f! reader — squid game

╰₊✧ preventing her untimely demise┊0.6k words

setting: season 2, episode 7 contains: canon-typical violence & murder, sorry nam-gyu fans, it’s one or the other, friends to lovers

➤ author's note: i was so mad when she died, why do the squid game writers hate lesbians

it’s difficult to see anything going on with the bright white fluorescent lights constantly flickering, but the sound of screams piercing through the night was enough to tell you that the “special game” had started and it was dangerous to remain in bed. you watched as one of the women next to you cried out in terror as a man used a broken bottle to stab at her chest,, and you immediately jumped out and hit the floor running before he could turn his sights on you. 

the first people who came to your mind to search for where your allies were to make sure they were alright, particularly min-su and se-mi whom you’ve become close over the past few days and knew would be targets of their previous group after voting to leave. 

you heard her familiar voice yelp in surprise just a little ways from you, the same voice that so often threw compliments at you like they didn’t fluster you so bad you wanted to hide under the blanket and comforted you when you cried about the people who lost their lives earlier that day when everyone else was asleep, sending you into a panic. 

as resilient as se-mi was, she was no match to overpower nam-gyu physically as you watched him corner her against the wall, his bloodlust so powerful you could almost smell it with one of the forks given out during dinnertime in hand. you could see a glint of red shining off the metal, indicating that it was already used to take a life. 

a glass bottle suddenly came in between them, shattering against the concrete floor. you didn’t even bother to look up, just seizing the opportunity to jump the man from behind and trying to steal the silverware from his grip while he was still in shock. while you couldn’t fully take it from him, you did manage to knock it out of his hands. 

you were smaller than him, but you used all of the strength in your body to keep him pinned down once se-mi kicked him in the stomach and picked up the utensil. without hesitation, she began to repeatedly stab him in the neck with it, over and over again, both of you ignoring his pleas and screams knowing that he would have done the same to her without so much as batting an eye. you only got off him when he stopped squirming under your grasp, ignoring the blood that splattered all over your hands, clothing, and face.

it hasn’t hit you yet that you just held a man down for her to murder and you’re sure the guilt will consume you later, but all that matters is that both of you have survived to see another day together. you’ve never been so happy to see those damn guards in their hot pink uniform, even if they were shortly taken down in a matter of minutes to steal their guns for the planned player revolt. both of you 

neither of you were allowed to join due to a lack of experience with firearms and being women, but due to the clear determination in your eyes, they did leave a walkie-talkie to call for backup if they needed it.

once the shots fell quiet and were no longer ringing in your ears, se-mi looked at you with a little smile on her face and reached out to caress your face, “you know, i always thought you were really pretty, but i think you look kinda sexy with the blood everywhere.”

“do you really?”

“of course, i do, but we really should wash up”

[misayani]

if you gave someone your heart and they died, did they take it with them? or do you spend the rest of forever with a hole inside you that couldn't be filled .

◜ pairing ... se-mi / player 380 x  fem reader

— angst

the room was suffocating, air heavy and filled with tension that had millions of emotions lingered in it. i can't do this— i can't do this. but no matter how many times you try to deny it, the truth was obvious— there was no way of escaping this.

heavy tears fell from your eyes, each drop hitting the cold floor below, as if carrying the weight of your breaking heart. sobs could be heard, your mind was too hazy to even comprehend if it was coming from you or —

se-mi was still, her chest rising and falling in slow, shallow breaths. the weight of her body seemed so much heavier than it had been just hours ago. you held her in your arms while weak cries left her mouth. the smile that had once been constant on her face was now a distant memory, lost to the fading of her strength.

you couldn't handle seeing her like this— so lifeless and numb. your eyes slowly closes, unwilling to bear the sight any longer. soft thuds vibrated from your chest and spreads through your whole body as she desperately tugs on your bloodied shirt.

"don't close your eyes, please. i wanna see you."

you shut them even tighter, her voice making its way to you unclear and distorted. a strained hiss left your mouth as you felt the sharp sting on your abdomen— please stop hitting me, please stop hitting me.

"please, baby, please let me see you this one last time." the soft, shaky voice called out to you, pain evident in her voice. a soft palm was placed gently on your cheek, and you immediately recognized it—the girl you met ten years ago, shared laughter with, cried with, made memories with—who would've thought that she'd be with you til the last breath.

suddenly, memories came in, flooding your mind. what the fuck? you can see a woman, tall and pale, leaning against the wall with a cigarette placed in between her lips. the faint smell of cigarettes lingered in the air, and you could almost smell it clearly—as if you were living in that present. it confused you— you have seen this exact same scene before, very closely similar to the night you and se-mi first met.

your thoughts were interrupted, caused by a loud and blaring buzz as the large doors slid open. heavy footsteps could be heard marching against the floor, echoes filling the almost empty room. they carried a long black box, enough to fit a human inside, as you can hear their steps grow louder and louder.

a soft kiss was gently placed on your forehead. she paused for a while before muttering, "i love you, and will always do."

soon enough, you felt arms separate you from the girl you love most. your breathing slowed as you found it harder to breathe, as if it was the hardest thing in the whole world. se-mi's lifeless eyes stared at your limp figure, her gaze heavy and filled with emotion. your chest rose and fell one last time, before you took your final breath.

the masked men gently placed you down inside the box before money came out of the ceiling, and into the large golden piggy bank.

45,600,000,000 WON

what the fuck was se-mi supposed to do with that? after you secretly took the dinner knife during the evening meal, after you stabbed yourself relentlessly in your abdomen, after she just watched the guards carry the box away, which inside lies the most genuine woman she had ever met, the one and only woman she carries in her heart.

"player 044, eliminated."

"congratulations player 380, you win!"

to my love, se-mi, i would die over and over again to spare you from the cruelties of this world.

from, your love.

𔗨 author's note — eughhhhhhhhhjsjskskskksk ????}??}%]%} BY THE WAY I missEd u guys a little bit toooo muchhh,, blehh !! also, im making a taglist !! comment if you wanna be added or some shit [lowercase intended]

p.s. the title is a quote from the book 'nineteen minutes' by jodi picoult. although i haven't actually read the book, the quote somehow became my favorite.

misa mentions —

@misayani

[dragoniangirl]

I would like to share my experience with a similar medication.

My doctor has been hyper-fixated on my weight for years. Every medical issue or concern I have he links it back to my weight. When I told him a while back about my concerns about my focus issues, he said it was because I had sleep apnea which meant I wasn't getting enough oxygen to my brain when I slept. And I had sleep apnea because I was fat. Not in those exact words but it was implied.

For the longest time he kept trying to push the bariatric surgery on me. Except I was apparently supposed to loose 60lbs before they'd even do a consultation for the surgery. If I was capable of loosing that much weight, I wouldn't need the surgery. But I digress. I was very adamant. I didn't want to get surgery to loose weight. (It also helped that I had a friend who is a nurse and when I mentioned the surgery she was appalled he would even suggest it to someone like me as I'm not even in the 300lb range but he still claims I'm "morbidly obese")

He suggested I do portion control and weight my food. I did and the next time I went in to see him and I told him that's what I was doing he goes "No no. You need to be counting your calories." By that point, I decided I wasn't going to listen to any of his advice about my weight as it just kept changing no matter what I did.

During one of my more recent visits (winter of 2023 I believe) he suggested Mounjaro (which is a drug similar to Ozempic as it's meant for people with type-II diabetes). He said it would work as an appetite suppressant. That I wouldn't feel as hungry and thus I wouldn't eat as much. He had a trial kit which had five injections in it so I wouldn't have to pay anything. I figured, fine. We'll give it a try. It was a once a week injection. I could handle that. We did the first injection there so they could show me how it was done and then I'd just have to do it again on the same day for the next couple weeks. Then I'd come back and we'd see the results. He did warn me one of the side effects would be nausea. "You'll feel nauseous but that's normal with this drug." he assured me. The way he explained it, he made it sound tame. I figured I could handle that.

I was very wrong.

Day one: Didn't feel any different but I figured it was just the first day and I wouldn't be feeling the effects right away.

Day two: Woke up for work feeling a little sick. Thought I'd be okay. Had a light breakfast then went into work. Spent the majority of the day running back and forth to the bathroom being violently sick. Couldn't keep anything down.

Day three: Same as before. Felt super nauseous. Had terrible cramps like my stomach was turning in on itself. Could barely keep anything down.

Day four: Felt slightly better. Not as sick but still felt on the verge of throwing up every time I ate more than a sandwich.

Day five: Better than day before. Could eat a little more without fear of throwing up. Cramps were still there.

Day six: Finally felt fine. No longer felt nauseous and could eat more.

Day seven: Still fine. Figured the nausea was because my body was just getting used to the drug. Now that I had experienced all that, I'd be okay.

Day eight: Injection day. Felt fine the whole day. Was feeling hopeful.

Day nine: I was wrong.

Day ten: Was sicker than I'd been the previous week. Could barely function at work.

Day eleven: When leaving for work, threw up on the way to the car and noticed I'd just thrown up the other medication I was on. Decided enough was enough.

I called the doctor's office to explain what was going on and if I could stop taking the medication. (I know better than to stop a medication cold turkey) They gave me the go ahead and scheduled an appointment that week. I go in and the first thing they do is weight me. When I see the doctor he's all excited because "You lost seven pounds!"

In two weeks.

I told him that was because I wasn't eating at all. And anything I was eating was being thrown up. I told him I didn't think it was healthy to loose that much weight in that short amount of time. He looked disappointed but agreed to take me off, marking in my medical chart that I was "allergic" to Mounjaro.

The next scheduled appointment I had with him, he once again started on my weight. Said it was a shame I had such a reaction to the Mounjaro because it worked so well. I got very upset with him about that. Yelled that "of course it worked well! It essentially gave me bulimia!"

So yeah. Unless you actually need this medication to treat the condition it's meant to treat (ie Type-II Diabetes) don't fucking take it. It sickens me that actual medical doctors are recommending this to their patients.

I have been debating sharing this for some time, but with the new year weight loss ads amping up, I feel it's something I have to say. I'm worried for people's health.

Unless you've been living under a rock, you probably already know about people taking the diabetic drug ozempic for weight loss. You've probably heard the debates about the ethics of taking needed drugs away from diabetes patients and maybe even the side effect of "ozempic face." However, there is one side effect of taking these drugs that, in my opinion, people are not being warned about.

If you carefully pay attention to the television ads, you will hear them mention "pancreatitis" as a possible side effect. If you're like me a decade ago, that word probably means nothing to you. Let me warn you, however, it is no minor thing. My husband suffered from chronic pancreatitis for five agonizing years. The pain is beyond comprehension. Doctors who specialize in the pancreas describe it as the worst pain a human can endure. There is no actual cure. Little is understood about the disease, so treatment is difficult. Doctors who understand it are few and far between. It took my husband forever to get diagnosed. He went through multiple surgeries and procedures, but nothing worked. He had to go on an extremely limiting diet. If he varied from it in any way, he would have an attack. The only way to recover from an attack was to not eat at all for days, then slowly add in broth and jello. Did he lose weight? Yes. As a matter of fact, one day he stepped out of the shower, and I burst into tears at the sight of him. He was skin and bones - I could count every rib. Was it worth it to be thin? If you even ask that question, I'm concerned for your mental health.

They couldn't figure out exactly why my husband got pancreatitis. At that time, they thought only alcoholics and drug addicts got pancreatitis. This made it difficult to get compassionate medical care, unfortunately. Now they know that prescription medication (particularly diabetic medication) and high cholesterol can also cause it. Then there is another group - where they just don't know. But you better believe I would hesitate to take any medication that could cause pancreatitis. I would weigh my options carefully to assess if it was worth the risk. In my opinion, weight loss is not worth that risk.

My concern has been heightened seeing the Hers commercials for these drugs (under different names, but rest assured, it is the same thing). These commercials brag that you can get these drugs from Hers with just a simple virtual call, no questions asked. I wonder if people are fully aware of the risks of these drugs. I also wonder if we even know all of the risks yet. I also fear that the culture around these drugs could develop into an us vs. them mentality. That if it's so easy to be thin, why wouldn't you be? And some are getting dangerously thin on these drugs.

I know some diabetics who are on these drugs, and necessarily so. They tell me that it causes nausea when they eat. That's why they don't eat much. Again, that doesn't sound like a pleasant way to live. If you need it to regulate your blood sugar, that's one thing. But if you don't? Why would you do this to yourself?

My husband is now healed of pancreatitis. It was a miracle. You may not believe in that sort of thing, but I'm telling you, there is no other explanation. We had exhausted every medical solution, then the pandemic hit. We were concerned because hospitals were only taking life or death cases. What if he had a bad attack and needed an iv of pain meds? What would we do? Weeks passed - no pain. A month passed - no pain. Six weeks passed - no pain. He decided to grill a steak - something he hadn't been able to even take a nibble of in 5 years. I watched him take a bite, holding my breath. Nothing. He ate the whole thing. No pain. Five years later, still no pain. The doctors can't explain it, either.

So our story has a happy ending. Not everyone else's does. I hope people take the time to read this. If you do, please, please share it. I don't want anyone suffering needlessly.

[moonydustx]

*Thinking and creating a little sketch of how my favorite characters deal with their partners dealing with problems.

To them, you are a force of nature.

Almost bordering on the utopian sense, an Odyssey written about you. You are the strongest person - perhaps resilient or resistant, he would really have difficulty in stipulating a precise name. From missions to everyday life, a fierce enemy or just a street fight, he didn't need to worry. He didn't need to, but that didn't mean he wouldn't. He would just lean against a nearby corner and appreciate you and your strength taking up the entire place even if it was just with words. The shine in his eyes indicated more than just simple recognition. There was respect, fascination and admiration there. You were an ode to many things he contemplated and being able to watch it from the front row made it all the better. However, if he saw someone trying to cheat, he would just move a few steps and touch the enemy's shoulder with false kindness. "You really don't want to touch my girl."

Luffy, Zoro, Mihawk, Law, Shanks, Kid (OP), Satoru, Suguru (JJK), Shikamaru, Kakashi (hear me out: he can do both) (Naruto)

To them, you are the most precious porcelain.

Not that they didn't see you as strong or resilient, quite the opposite. He admired those traits in you and knew that you would know how to make great use of your strength if necessary. But from the moment you agreed to be on their side, you no longer needed to worry. It was that old story of the privilege of a scary dog ​​by your side. Missions that were too complicated? They would deal with the greatest risk. A silly fight in a random bar? The man who dared to raise his voice in your direction would not live long enough to brag about it. An impossible-to-open can? Leave it to him and you would be thrilled with the achievement. Sure, he knew that his manner could be a bit too much for some people, but your smile - even if it occasionally had a touch of sarcasm as you thanked him for being your great hero - was more than enough of a reward. That, along with all the thank-you kisses he would receive, oh, that was worth it.

Sanji, Katakuri, Smoker, Killer, Ace, Sabo (OP) Nanami, Yuji, Higuruma (JJK) Iruka, Yamato (I mean, he would scare the enemy just thinking about it) (Naruto)

-

a/n: Did I forget anyone? I saw Naruto during my writing hiatus and I thought it would be a good idea to put some characters here.

[azzifuddfanpage]

All I want for Christmas is You

Thanks for the prompt 😛 2.1k words

themes: Christmas? Idk

tw: smut

prompt: This is around now/ them being in a relationship. The wholes team is kinda sulky and grey after losing USC even thought it’s almost Christmas. They are all just chilling in the dorms, playing video games, chatting, and packing up for the break. Azzi decides to surprise Paige with an earlier Christmas gift. She calls her over and reveals her festive lingerie. Paige is obviously gooning and immediately shuts the door. (go all out with the scene I didn’t have any l ideas 💀)After a while they realize they went a little crazy and are defiantly gonna have to wash themselves up… and the sheets. “Paige why are you cleaning the sheets right before your leaving for home?”- a teammate asks.        -😛

The entire media conference after the game was brutal. Paige sat there and was professional but wanted nothing more than to wrap herself up in Azzi’s arms. 

After 3 years of dating, they had been closer than ever. Azzi was the only one who knew how to make her feel better-way better- after a loss. 

When they were back in the dorms, everyone was just chilling in the living room of the suite. 

Paige sat with Ice and Kk playing fortnite trying to get her mind off of the loss.

Paige was one to take the loss personally so she would do everything she could to get her mind off of it.

“Hey do you know where Azzi is?” Paige asked as she went for another kill. 

“She’s still with the trainer.” Ice replied shortly as she continued fiddling with the remote. Distracted, paige handed off the remote to sarah who happily took over for her.

Paige missed Azzi, bad, the longer they had been dating the more needy Paige had found herself for her. 

Paige slumped onto the couch behind them facing Azzi’s bedroom door, and pulled out her phone. 

—-

Me: wya I miss u😕

💗: I’m at the trainer I’ll be home soon Paigey 

Me: 😐

💗: it will be worth the wait trust me I have a surprise for u 

Ur gonna like it a lot trust me….

—-

It looked like the day was gonna be looking up.

30 minutes later, the front door opened and Paige immediately whipped her head around to make eyes with Azzi. 

Paige immediately stood up and ran to Azzi wrapping her arms around her waist tightly and snuggling into the crook of her neck. 

“Missed you so much baby.” She said as she breathed in the smell of her coconut shampoo and vanilla perfume. 

Paige looked down and saw Azzi was carrying a black and pink bag. Her eyes perked up. 

“Is that what I think it is?” Paige whispered teasingly while attaching her lips to Azzi’s neck making her giggle. 

“Maybe… but you’re gonna have to wait a few minutes so I can get your present all set up.” Azzi responded moving her hand up to play with paige’s blonde hair that had fallen into her face as she clung to her. 

“Present? What for?” Paige said eagerly trying to snoop in the bag.

“Paige! Be patient, no peaking. It’s just an early Christmas gift. Just stay here and I will call you in when I’m ready.” Azzi replied pulling away from paige and walking to the bedroom. 

Paige smirked and walked over to the couch as she watched Azzi walk into the bedroom. 

Paige spread her legs a little as Azzi turned around watching as Azzi blushed her eyes darting to her clothed center. 

Azzi then put a finger to her lips and disappeared into her bedroom.

Paige felt her panties dampen in anticipation on what Azzi had planned for her. 

The longer Azzi took the more needy she became.

10 long minutes later she heard Azzi call out.

“Paige can you come help me in here?” Paige bolted up and brusquely but nonchalantly (or so she thought) to Azzi’s room.

“Fuck guess I need to grab my headphone” ice said laughing as Paige shut Azzi’s door behind her. They weren’t exactly quiet.

Inside Azzi’s room paige walked in to the bed and felt two hands creep around the back of her head covering her eyes. 

“Guess who” Azzi smirked behind her

“Hmmm I don’t know Q?” Paige said teasingly. 

“Alright you’re not getting your present after that one.” Azzi laughed as paige hungrily turned around. 

“Where is it?” Paige said as she looked at Azzi who was wearing her pink fluffy robe. 

“Get on the bed and I’ll show you.” Azzi said dominantly giving her a shove so she would fall backwards.

Paige crawled up to the headboard and turned around so she was facing Azzi watching her in awe.

Azzi slowly reached for the tie of her robe and began to undo the knot.

Paige felt her breath hitch as she watched the pink fluffy robe slide down Azzi’s shoulders and drop onto the floor.

Paiges eyes scanned Azzi’s body in adoration.

She was weary a silver and red lingerie set that was lacy and completely mesh. 

Paige thought her eyes were going to bulge out of her head at the sight of Azzi’s perky nipples poking through the thin shear fabric. 

Suddenly paige found herself extremely needy for Azzi’s touch.

“You’re so beautiful Azzi.” Paige said her eyes continuing to stare at her body.

Azzi smirked as she climbed onto the bed and crawled towards Paige.

Azzi pushes her shoulders so she is now fully laying on her back on the bed.

Azzi sits up staring down on her, straddling her legs.

She leans forward and starts to press soft kisses along her jaw and neck.

“You’re the prettiest girl in the world.” Azzi says in between kisses as Paige lets out a soft sigh. 

Azzi moves her hands downwards, lips still connected to Paige’s neck, and tugs on her t shirt.

Paige puts her hands up instinctively and Azzi slides it off her, immediately coming in contact with her soft nipples hardening under Azzi’s gaze.

“Wow no bra? Someone was ready for this, huh?” Azzi laughs as she connects her hands and begins to massage Paige’s chest. 

“Wanted to be ready for your surprise.” Paige whispers eagerly as she pulls Azzi’s face in to kiss her.

Paige’s hunger for Azzi’s skin is almost bubbling as she runs her tongue along Azzi’s bottom lip. She attaches her teeth and pulls watching Azzi lean towards her needily, letting out a breathy moan. 

Azzi starts to grind her hips against Paige’s pelvis begging for friction. 

Azzi leans back placing her hand on Paiges thighs as she arches her back and grinds down on Paige’s thighs.

A groan leaves paige’s mouth as she searches desperately for more contact.

She opens her eyes and watches in aw as Azzi gently grinds back and forth on her. 

“Please.” Paige moans noticing the damp spot on Azzi’s panties. 

“You need more baby?” Azzi says seductively as she begins to slide down paige’s pants continuing to ride her.

Paige lets out a yelp, biting her lip as Azzi presses her knee against paige’s clit. 

“Oh god.” Paige groans as she throws her head back.

Azzi leans forward laying her chest on Paige as she continues to apply pressure on her pussy. 

She starts to press kisses against her tits, sucking on her nipples and blowing as she starts to feel the slick accumulate in between them. 

Paige moans loudly against Azzi’s chest.

“Shh! Paige you have to be quiet we don’t need anymore complaints.” Azzi teases as paige rolls her eyes.

“Haha very funny, if I remember right it was your screaming that had caroline running in thinking you were dying.” Paige replies still out of breath. Azzi returns the eyeroll and presses her hand against paige’s mouth to shut her up.

Paige spreads her legs wider giving Azzi more access to grind against her. 

After what felt like hours of Azzi’s rubbing against her clit paige could barely keep herself together.

“Azzi please” she groaned “need to cum please.”

Azzi giggled to herself at her girlfriend’s fucked out state. 

“Look at me baby.” Azzi said dominantly “I want you to watch me while you cum.” 

Paiges eyes immediately popped open entranced by Azzi staring directly back at her. 

Azzi’s eyes alone were enough to make her cum, and when Azzi started picking up the pace, rubbing herself against paige more aggressively, paige could no longer contain her cum, letting her juices spill out of her and onto the bed sheets as she moaned.

As Azzi continued to grind against her, riding out her high, paige began to rub her fingers teasingly over her panties watching as Azzi’s eyes rolled to the back of her head, already stimulated by her grinding against paige. 

Paige watched Azzi intently focused on Azzi’s body.

As paige began to apply more pressure Azzi lifted her hips now hovering over paige’s stomach kneeling so her legs were seperated enough for paige to access her clit.

Azzi let out a raspy moan, and Paige pulled her panties to the side desperately needing to be in contact with her wetness.

Azzi’s warm heat coated her fingers as she rubbed back and forth against her pussy. 

Azzi leaned over to stabilize herself as Paige stuffed two fingers inside her tight hole. 

Paige began to thrust in and out of her stabilizing her by holding onto her waist. 

As she felt Azzi’s legs shake she flipped them over so she was now on top. 

With her new angle she pounded furiously into Azzi’s pussy, using her thumb to rub at her clit. 

Azzi continued to moan loudly pulling at paige’s hair, thrusting her hips so paige’s fingers would dig deeper in her core.

Paiges fingers plunging into her gummy walls caused Azzi to shake with pleasure. 

Hearing Azzi’s frustrated moans as she tried to rub herself against paige’s fingers.

Paige paused, watching as Azzi whimpered and squirmed deserpeate for her fingers to restart their pounding. 

Azzi started trying to fuck herself on Paige’s fingers, desperate to reach her climax.

Just as Azzi let out another needy moan, paige plunged another finger in, pounding 3 in and out of her.

Paige uses her other hand to rub her clit, before pressing gently on her lower stomach.

With that Azzi feels the band in her stomach snap, and feels her cum spill out of her joining paige’s on the sheets

They go back and forth pleasing each other until they are just a heap of moans unable to catch their breath.

The sheets are soaked with sweat and their cum.

“Guess we may have over done it.” Azzi laughed her head laying in the sheets. 

“Nahh don’t know what you’re talking about.” Paige replied cheekily. 

They lay there nuzzled together for a little longer but eventually Azzi could no longer stand it.

“Alright I gotta shower and you have got to wash these sheets like this is just embarrassing I feel like I wet the bed.” Azzi huffed trying to sit up with Paige’s lengthy body weighing her down. 

“I mean you kinda did.” Paige said trying to hide her giggle as Azzi glared at her and hitting her over the head with a pillow.

“Says you!” She shot back as she crawled out of paige’s grasp and stood up.

“We are leaving tomorrow morning early, if you don’t wash the sheets now they will be worse when we get back.” Azzi said as paige fell back onto the bed.

“Ughhhh” she whined, “I know I know I have to clean them. But I literally just did like 2 days ago… “ paige whined as she sat back up and grabbed Azzi’s hand.

“I don’t like when you shower without me.” Paige pouted fluttering her eyelashes teasingly. 

Azzi shoved her face with her hand laughing, “you’re such a freak paige oh my god.” She pauses for a minute. “If you go clean the sheets we will see what happens.” Azzi says shrugging leaving the room so paige can ponder that. 

Paige makes the executive decision it would be a good idea to see where things that night might lead with Azzi so she strips the bed and makes a pile to bring to the laundry.

Paige is fantasizeing about all the things Azzi might have planned since she is being a “good girl” and cleaning the sheets like Azzi asked her, when she hears a knock. 

“Back so soon” Paige teases assuming Azzi couldn’t resist her… it was Aubrey. 

“Uhm sorry, not who you were hoping, I just had a quick-“ Aubrey looks down at paige piling her sheets into her hamper, “you know what I’m gonna just ask Ice it’s fine.” She trials off. “Why are you washing your sheets paige?” She teases knowing exactly what it means. 

“What do you mean? I can’t wash my sheets now?” Paige replied confused. 

“You just changed them like two days ago? And we are leaving for vacation it’s not like you will be sleeping on them anytime soon.” 

Paige smirked, “well they got dirty quick I guess.” 

Aubrey stares at her a little confused then Azzi walks in the room and the pieces click.

Her eyes widen, “y’all are nasty” Aubrey says laughing running out of the room, likely to go tell Ice and Kk.

Azzi looks at Paige confused. 

“What did I do?” Azzi says softly her big eyes staring at Paige, and paige can’t help but melt under her adorable eyes. 

“She’s just jealous baby don’t worry.” paige says pulling her into a hug and rubbing her hand on her back. 

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Not a Word 1

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You live a life in hiding, away from your father and the world, until a man decides to drag you into the light. (non-verbal reader)

Characters: Captain Syverson

Note: Happy Monday.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

You can’t hear your father’s voice anymore. You stand at your door, listening for any sign of life. It’s not him you want to avoid, though he’s rarely happy to see you, but his company. You’re pretty sure they left but not entirely. You feel asleep working on your diamond art. 

You can’t wait much longer. You have to pee so bad that you can feel it in your throat. It’s late. You’re sure you’re alone. 

The door hinges scrape like they always do. You hate that noise. You tiptoe down the hall, towards the yellow blare of the kitchen light. You turn into the bathroom and shut the door. You sigh as finally you get your release. 

You flinch as you stand up and pull your elastic waistband over your hips. The hollow metal tink of a metal can sounds from outside. It could be your dad. That would make sense. He probably got up to get water or another can of beer. 

You wash your hands and go back out. You head towards your bedroom without a look in the other direction. The grizzly pronunciation of your name draws you back. Your eyes round as you scuff to a halt. 

You turn to face the burly man at the end of the hall. “Did I wake you?” Sy asks. 

You gulp and shake your head. He’s one of your dad’s coworkers from the shop. He comes over with a six-pack and they sit on the porch to enjoy it. Or they linger in the kitchen and play cards. 

As the shadows shroud him, he looks even bigger than usual. You’ve only ever seen him from a distance. Usually he’s sitting down. Maybe you just never noticed how gigantic he truly is. 

He flips on the hallway light and you blink. His dark beard adds to the squareness of his jaw and his shaved head has dark stubble in a deep peak on his forehead. His blue eyes sparkle despite his naturally fearsome posture. 

“I just got your daddy to bed,” he says. “He should be just fine. You check that he’s on his belly tomorrow morning.” 

You nod again. He does the same. He doesn’t appear frustrated as your father. He seems almost intrigued as he stays there, scratching above the collar of his tee. 

“You okay?” 

You nod. 

“Checkin’, ya know? It’s late. Dark can be scary, huh?” 

Yes, your head bobs in agreement. 

“Right, well, you have a good night. Let me know if ya need anything in the morning. I put my number on the fridge.” He taps on the door frame and turns away. 

Most of your dad’s friends or the same. They don’t pay you much mind. You prefer that. You’re not one for chatting. That fact irks your father to no end. You just stay out of his way, and his friends’, and hide in your room. 

You wait until you hear the front door. Then you go to lock it as Sy’s footsteps clamour on the porch. You stay there, his headlights shining through the window as his engine rumbles to life. The gravel crunches as he reverses out and steers off into the night. 

You go around and shut off the lights. You take your time in the kitchen tidying up the beer cans. You wipe the counters quickly and rinses the dregs off your fingers. You leave the light on so you can find your door. 

You shut yourself in and go back to bed. You leave the small lamp on next to it and turn your back to the glow. You yawn and close your eyes. 

Another night. It’s a bit sad that the best part of your day is going to sleep. Your waking hours aren’t very interesting. When you’re not doing the chores or the cooking, you’re in there, busying yourself with something meaningless. Nothing you do will ever make a difference; not for you or anyone else. 

That’s why your dad hates you so much. You can’t blame him. There’s no jobs out there for someone like you. You tried and all you got for it was embarrassment and a new slew of insults. 

You cross your arms over the top of the blankets and sigh. When you lay in your bed, you can be anything. Behind your eyelids, you can’t paint pictures more gleaming than those etched in the small plastic diamonds. You could be a princess or an actress or even just someone normal. 

What keeps you awake, isn’t your dreams. It’s the dread of the inevitable. Once you fall asleep, you’ll have to wake up again and face bitter reality. 

🩶

Your dad’s snoring rocks you through the walls. The house is small. You hear a lot more than you like. Often, you leave the old Casio radio playing on low to gloss over the cricks and cracks and groans. 

You get up, knowing better than to wait until he does first. If you have the coffee waiting, it will appease a fraction of his temper. With a hangover racking his skull, he won’t be in the best of moods. 

The dead heat of summer roils through the house. Your dad has an AC unit in his bedroom window but it’s not big enough to do much beyond his door. He keeps that closed most days anyways. On the cold days, he also keeps the small electric heater locked away with him. 

You change into a pair of loose linen capris and a plain tank top. You don’t go anywhere so you don’t dress for any occasion. Most of your clothes are akin to pajamas, or nothing more than. 

The machine is old and dingy. No matter how many times you descale it, it keeps that yellow stain in the plastic. You snap the lid shut and flip the red button so it lights up. Dad says once it stops turning on, he’ll waste money on a new one. 

You get yourself a glass of water and wait. It’s early still but his alarm won’t let him sleep in. As it goes off, you keep busy.  

There’s a slam and a grumble. Your dad stirs violently and his door hits the frame as he swings it open. He lumbers out as you pour him a mug. He belches and ignores you. You put it on the table as he turns down the hall and goes into the bathroom. He leaves the door open and you hear his stream piddle into the toilet. 

You ignore it and turn back to your task. Breakfast. It’s the same thing every day. You do his eggs, sunny side up, toasted Wonder bread, and six strips of bacon. The smell soon has your mouth watering. The chair scrapes the floor loudly as he drops into it heavily. 

He slurps loudly behind you as you put together his plate. You set it before him and he wiggles the empty mug at you. You take it and pour him another from the carafe. 

A car door snaps shut. You wince. You didn’t hear an engine, but you’d been too swept up in cooking. You give your dad his refill and go to check the front window. 

“Is it that mailman already?” He hollers. 

You shake your head, even knowing that he won’t see.  

“Don’t know why I fucking ask,” he snarls. 

You watch Sy jump out of his truck. While the axle is high, it isn’t very treacherous for a man his size. He kicks up gravel as he steps around the door and shuts it. You back away as he heads towards the house. 

He clomps up the steps, thump, thump, thump, and you jitter as he approaches the other side of the door. You wait until he knocks before you answer it. You peek out through a single inch of space. He grins. You don’t think he’s ever smiled at you. You assumed he never did at all. 

“How’s the old man?” He asks. 

You blink and let the door open a bit more and give thumbs up. As good as he’ll ever be.  

“That’s good,” he drawls. “So...” 

His eyes drift down, just a little. You squirm. Your shirt feels thinner as you stand there. Your nipple poke into the fabric and you hug yourself awkwardly. You remember you asked your father for a bra once. He laughed and you never brought it up again. You try to stick to loose clothing. 

You point over your shoulder then make a gesture as if you’re holding a fork and scooping. 

“Having breakfast, that’s nice.” 

You don’t have enough for him. You’ll wait until your dad’s at work before you sit and have your single slice of toast and peanut butter. 

“I already ate, in case ya worried,” he assures. “Was just comin’ to make sure I didn’t give him too much sauce.” 

He laughs. His booming humour makes your flinch. Your brows pop up and he quiets. 

“Sorry, I know, I’m a loud one, huh?” He snorts, “I don’t mean ta scare ya.” 

“I told ya, she don’t say shit,” your father growls into a yawn. You step back and the door opens all the way as you press yourself to the wall. He saunters forward in his boxers and tank top. “No point goin’ on like that when she probably don’t even understand.” 

“She understands me,” Sy avows confidently. “After a night with your drunk ass, it’s a breath of fresh air to have someone not yammer on.” 

“You’re the one brought me the piss,” your father retorts. 

“And you didn’t complain when I did,” he counters. “Wanted to see if ya were going to make it in today. Just in case I gotta finish up Dubeau’s clunker.” 

“I’ll be there,” your father sneers. “Why don’t you go and get it all warmed up for me?” 

“You’re a prick, Don,” Sy huffs. 

“What? No, you can’t see it,” your father covers his crotch and you blanch, looking away embarrassed. 

“Don,” Sy rebukes, “there’s a lady.” 

“It’s my daughter, dammit. She’s too stupid to get it,” he spits. “Hey, you, go on, kitchen’s a mess.” 

You nod and avoid looking at the other man out of embarrassment. Your father is crass, sometimes even at your expense. And he knows you can understand him. He must. You do everything he tells you too. 

“Well, then, I’ll see ya round,” Sy calls, though you only realise he’s talking to you as your dad changes the subject to some tail pipe. 

You stop and peek back. Sy watches you over your dad’s head. You give a wave, just a tilt of your hand, then continue into the kitchen. 

You can’t help but be thankful for the interruption. Sy’s boisterous intrusion offered a buffer between you and your dad’s hangover. You wash his plate, cutlery, and mug, before you move onto the pots and pans you used to cook. 

You can hear your dad barking outside at Sy. The other man responds with a deep rumble. Are they arguing? 

The front door swings open, “hey, girl,” you dad whistles, “more coffee. Bring some for this lump.” 

You take the order in stride. You don’t have enough for two cups, maybe half of one. You start a new pot and wait. When it’s finished, you dry your dad’s mug and pull out another. You carry both to the front door and elbow through. 

You hand one to each man as they stand by the porch railing. Your dad takes his gruffly, spilling some on your fingers, but Sy thanks you. 

“You didn’t even ask if he wanted sugar or cream,” your dad chides. You give him a startled look. He snorts. “How’d ya do that, huh? Maybe blink your eyes real big.” 

You frown at his mocking. Sy exhales and you back away. Now you have two men annoyed with you. You glance over at the bigger of the pair as he stares at you. You should’ve thought of you. Coffee is bitter, it’s why you don’t drink it. 

You point to his cup and he shakes his head, “coffee’s fine,” he insists, “I’ll have something sweet later.” You nod and retreat. You turn your back to them and step inside. Before you close the door, you hear Sy, “you know I take my coffee black, Don. No needa to give the girl a hard time.” 

You shut it before you can catch whatever snide remark your father tosses back. You know he won’t take kindly to being told what to do, especially if it’s to do with you. Or because of you. You’ll hear it all later, you’re sure. 

[arakkne]

There's a lot of nuanced and thoughtful replies on both sides of this discussion, but I think this is what I agree with the most.

Admittedly, I am not vegan or vegetarian. I eat meat rarely, but I do eat it. One of my goals for 2025 is to transition most of the animal products I eat to be sourced locally from nearby farms. I want to be mindful of the fact that I'm eating a being that was once alive and conscious and had emotions, and I want to feel gratitude that I can eat and live because of it. This only feels just if the animal itself lived a good, humane, sustainable life before dying. If the animal was raised in a CAFO (Concentrated Animal Feeding Operation) where it could barely turn around and rarely saw the sun, then it would not be just. It would be an atrocity.

Additionally, many people in the reblogs are taking the position that taking on an environmentally conscious lifestyle (e.g. plant-based diet, reusable period products, etc) is somehow misogynistic. I understand the argument: if the vast majority of men are not doing these things, why should we waste our precious time, energy, and money doing them either? It's a good question, and a valid position that I would agree with—if the shadow of global warming was not darkening our door.

Radfems: do you remember how it felt to first learn radfem theory? To have your eyes opened to the reality of the world, much more horrible and oppressive and unfair than you were led to believe? To become a killjoy as you can no longer turn that part of your brain off?

That's how it is as an ecofeminist, but with a far more urgent threat of existential doom. Once you start paying attention to the environment, your eyes are once more opened to the reality of the world, much more horrible and oppressive and unfair than you were led to believe.

For example, the top ten hottest years on record were the last ten years (2014-2024). Climate scientists have long said that we must keep the global temperature below 1.5°C or "well below" 2°C above pre-industrial temperatures. This is the point at which the risk of catastrophic and irreversible changes to the planet increases significantly. It's a long-term domino effect, meaning that what we do today locks in what we experience in our future. In short: as the planet warms, the ice sheets melt, which disturbs global atmospheric and oceanic trends, amplifying extreme weather events such as flooding and wildfires, ultimately causing millions of people to die or be displaced from their homes. Famine will likely ensue as systems of agriculture, farming, and fishing are severely disrupted. The severe rate of biodiversity loss and species extinction we are already experiencing will only continue.

2024 was the first year on record to have a global temperature above 1.5°C.

Figure 1: Annual global mean temperature anomalies from January – September 2024 (relative to the 1850-1900 average) from six international datasets.

The message is clear: if we want to avoid the most catastrophic changes, we must act NOW.

So: what the fuck do we do??

The painfully obvious answer is to get our governments to actually give a shit. If the world leaders banded together and decided to care about people over profits for once, then we might actually see a significant change in the climate.

But that's not happening. Especially not with Trump in office. Especially not as bombs keep exploding in Gaza and Ukraine. No.

So what the fuck do we do??

We look at the data, and see what we can do as individuals to make the most significant impact.

Figure 2: The most impactful individual carbon-cutting lifestyle changes.

Well, the top seven of these choices tend to be prohibitively expensive and sometimes out of our control. In contrast, switching to a plant-based diet (or even just reducing meat!) has an enormous individual impact per year.

Why is reducing meat consumption so impactful? Long story short, this is because our current, Western method of raising animals is an extremely environmentally harmful process. The amount of land and water we use to grow crops just for animals while people are starving is absurd. The animals themselves are in horrendous conditions like CAFOs that amplify carbon and methane emissions. It's not sustainable or just. Eating fish is no better, as most of the oceanic pollution comes from fishing lines, but that's a whole other topic.

In conclusion: I don't think anyone should be forced to change their diet, especially women. But I have no sympathy for people who complain about being guilt-tripped. We need to feel guilty in order to enact change. The Western way of life specifically has glorified convenience and individualism. These are not sustainable modes of thinking, and on a societal level they contribute directly to industries (fast fashion, etc) that accelerate global warming. It would be ideal if our world leaders actually made policies to combat the climate crisis so that we don't have to feel guilty, but if the people who are actually at fault are not going to step up, then someone has to.

Obviously everyone's circumstances are different, and some will not be able to afford or access more eco-friendly options. It is the job of governments, nonprofits, and concerned citizens to implement programs to help bridge those access and affordability gaps. But, come on. If you care and you are able and you can afford it, then why not make a lifestyle change that benefits the environment? Just being more environmentally conscious, at the risk of feeling guilty about your consumption, also opens up a way of thinking that connects you deeply to the world around you. Is it not more feminist to at least look at the world with open eyes?

References:

Figure 1: World Meteorological Organization. 2024. "2024 is on track to be hottest year on record as warming temporarily hits 1.5°C" https://wmo.int/news/media-centre/2024-track-be-hottest-year-record-warming-temporarily-hits-15degc

Figure 2: Cripps, Elizabeth. 2022. What Climate Justice Means and Why We Should Care. Bloomsbury Continuum.

Further Reading:

(Highly highly highly recommend!!) Keith, Lierre. 2015. "The Girls and the Grasses." https://dgrnewsservice.org/resistance-culture/radical-feminism/lierre-keith-the-girls-and-the-grasses/

Omolere, Mitota. 2024. "What 2C of Warming Will Look Like: A Comprehensive Assessment." https://earth.org/what-2c-of-warming-will-look-like-a-comprehensive-assessment/

McGuire, Bill. 2023. "The point of no return: how close is the world to irreversible climate change?" https://www.sgr.org.uk/resources/point-no-return-how-close-world-irreversible-climate-change

Why is it a controversial take to say women shouldn't prioritise a chicken's life over their own? Veganism is not feminist, full stop. I get it, I feel bad for the animals too, but the world isn't all sunshine and rainbows, and as omnivores humans need animal products to be strong and not malnourished. Women are raised to be overly empathetic to anything other than themselves. You can't buy into this self-destruction, be on an EXTREMELY restrictive diet, and call yourself a radical feminist. I thought we were fighting diet culture here.

I will go to the gym and eat a steak for every woman that diets herself into being tiny and weak and skinny, don't @ me. A female human being is not a fucking squirrel. Be in a misogynistic cult if you want to, but don't shame other women for not joining it.

[swappermanent]

Freckles (Part 3 - Grandpa's POV)

Life has changed a lot for me in the past nine months. You don’t realize just how much you miss about being young until you’ve got it back. I thought I had a good handle on things, swapping into Dylan every summer like clockwork. A week here, a week there—it was enough to scratch the itch, to remind me of what it felt like to have a strong back, quick reflexes, and boundless energy. But let me tell you, living in a young body for this long? It’s different. Night and day.

Kai—no, Theo now—was right. I’ll admit it. I was reluctant when he first said it to me, standing there in that smug stance of his, shirtless as always, grinning like he had the world figured out. “You clearly get a kick out of being in Dylan’s body,” he said, his tone dripping with knowing amusement. And damn if he didn’t have a point.

I hesitated back then, but looking at me now? I owe Theo a massive thank-you. Staying in Dylan’s body for longer than a week was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. For one thing, there’s a kind of freedom that comes with being young and I’ve been taking full advantage of it.

I live in Berlin now. Thanks to my little caveat—"Feel free to alter your body in any way you see fit during the year"—it was totally in bounds to do something like this. A new life, a fresh start. Berlin seemed like the obvious choice. The city practically begs you to reinvent yourself, to explore every side of who you are, no matter how deeply it��s been buried.

The real Dylan wasn’t thrilled about the move, but what could he do? We all already had Irish passports anyway, so it wasn’t like there were any logistical hurdles. He’ll get over it, I’m sure. Honestly, though, I think he’s secretly jealous.

Besides, this is the perfect place to explore my sexuality. Everyone here is so open—no judgment, no shame. I’ve had sex in all the clubs, even in the middle of Tempelhof Feld. Men, women—it doesn’t matter. And let me tell you, everyone wants my hog and body, which is in peak form.

But the best night I’ve had was one where I wasn’t taking the active role in the encounter.. I’d been getting into leather lately, exploring the scene and one night, I found myself at a warehouse party. Dim red lights, pounding music, the smell of sweat and leather mingling in the air. I was dressed for the occasion—harness, boots, nothing else.

That’s where I met them. A Swedish guy, tall and broad-shouldered, with blond hair and piercing eyes that pinned me in place. And a Bulgarian guy, muscular, his dark eyes smoldering with a confidence that left no room for argument. They didn’t ask; they just knew I would take it.

And I did.

They worked together like a symphony, positioning me between them with practiced ease. The Bulgarian was the first to push inside, his cock thick and unrelenting. I gasped, clutching at his shoulders as he filled me, stretching me in a way that felt like too much and just enough all at once. And then, the Swedish guy. His cock pressed against me, slick and insistent, until he slid in beside the first, my body opening up to take them both.

I’d never felt anything like it—the fullness, the weight of them moving in tandem, their rhythm so perfectly in sync it felt orchestrated. One of them reached around to stroke my cock, his grip firm and knowing, while the other’s hand moved to my chest, teasing my nipples until I was trembling. The pleasure was overwhelming, building in waves that crashed over me again and again, each one higher than the last.

When I finally came, it was like the entire world blurred out of existence. My cock pulsed in the Swedish guy’s hand, the orgasm tearing through me with a force that left me breathless. My legs nearly gave out, but they held me steady, their movements never faltering as they milked every last drop of pleasure from my body. By the time they finished, I was spent, my skin slick with sweat, my heart pounding like I’d run a marathon.

That night changed something in me. It wasn’t just the sex—it was the surrender, the freedom of letting go completely. Afterward, they helped me clean up, their touches surprisingly gentle, and we shared drinks at the bar, laughing and swapping stories like old friends.

And now? Well I think I’m officially a Berliner.

[pbaz7]

AGAINST THE TIDE: PART TEN

paige x azzi

warning: sexual content

word count: 7.7k

A/N: Sorry this one is a little late in the day I was bob the builder today putting a dresser together 😭. I think y’all will like this chapter, it’s just really cute honestly, couldn’t do any angst after yesterday just needed pure serotonin. Hope everyone had a great day 🫶🏼

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After their first date, Paige and Azzi found themselves spending more time together again. Their connection felt natural, as if no time had passed, but now it was layered with a new intimacy they didn’t have before. They still followed the established boundaries, but unlike before, the boundaries were more exciting than restrictive–filled with unspoken promises and a sense of anticipation.

When they watched movies, they cuddled, Azzi often curling into Paige’s side. Without thinking, Azzi’s fingers would trace patterns on Paige’s palm. A new habit, different from how she used to play with her fingers, a habit Paige quickly became addicted to. Despite the growing closeness, they still hadn’t kissed and they didn’t spend the night in one another’s rooms, much to Paige’s dismay who claimed she just wanted to cuddle. Still, she was always respectful, hugging Azzi and giving her a kiss on the cheek as she left or insisting to walk Azzi ‘home’ even if it was just a couple of stairs down.

Their busy schedule made it hard to plan another date. November was always chaotic with practices, games, and travel taking up most of their time. But when they did finally find a free evening, Azzi suggested they go bowling.

Azzi had been teasing Paige all night about how she was finally better than her at something, but of course, Paige disagreed. “I’ve had more strikes than you,” Paige pointed out, throwing a glance over at the scoreboard. “You’ve just been lucky.

Azzi shrugged nonchalantly, a playful smile pulling at her lips. “Sure, keep telling yourself that. You were the one lucky at the beginning.” She rolled the ball down the lane, watching it spin toward the pins with confidence.

Paige laughed, but the competition was lighthearted. The evening had been filled with the kind of easy back-and-forth that only happens when two people are completely comfortable with one another.

When it was Paige’s turn to bowl again, Azzi was walking back towards the chairs and Paige’s hand swatted her ass hard as she said “I’ll catch up,” with a grin, not waiting for a response before walking towards the lane with her ball in hand.

Azzi rolled her eyes but didn’t say anything, the brief flash of amusement on her face giving away just how much she was enjoying the attention.

As the game went on, their touchiness grew more frequent, more natural. At one point, Azzi was standing directly behind Paige while she was preparing for her next turn. Sheleaned in, resting her chin on Paige’s shoulder as her arms wrapped loosely around Paige’s waist. Paige, for her part, didn’t flinch, the contact familiar and comforting in a way despite Azzi’s intentions. She just focused on the game, letting Azzi’s presence sink in.

Azzi’s breath tickled the back of Paige’s neck, sending a rush of warmth through her. “You seem so focused, P,” Azzi whispered, her voice light but teasing.

Paige gave a half-laugh as she released the ball, knocking down most of the pins. “I was,” she replied, her voice amused. She looked at Azzi, catching her eyes for a moment, feeling the subtle tension of their proximity.

They started to take breaks in between each turn, both of them wanting the night to last longer. When they sat down to rest, Azzi casually threw her legs over Paige’s lap, not giving it a second thought. She leaned her head back against the seat, her eyes closed, as Paige absentmindedly ran her fingers along Azzi’s leg, a silent acknowledgment of how close they had become.

Paige loved every second of the date even though it was so simple. She loved how carefree Azzi seemed to be. How she wasn’t tensing slightly at the beginning of every touch while they were in public. How she initiated most of it. It was simple but Paige definitely noticed all the little things about Azzi’s behavior tonight. The younger girl just seemed a lot more comfortable than she used to.

As time passed, their interactions grew more intimate as they got lost in one another's presence. Azzi, doing whatever felt natural, slid her hands under Paige’s hoodie as they talked, her fingers brushing against her hips. Paige’s breath hitched slightly, a quick jolt of surprise running through her. She sent Azzi a look, her voice low but clear when she said, “Azzi please.”

Azzi immediately pulled her hands back, putting her hands up in surrender, but the playful twinkle in her eyes remained. “What? You didn’t like it?” she teased.

Paige couldn’t help but chuckle. “You’re pushing it,” she said, though there was a smile tugging at her lips.

Azzi only shrugged, unconcerned. “Alrighty,” she said with a grin, clearly content to let the teasing continue.

It was clear that they were only getting more comfortable with one another. Paige, for all her playful competitiveness, couldn’t deny how much she enjoyed these little moments with Azzi.

The game continued on for far longer than either of them had intended. With every turn, every laugh, and every playful jab, the competition was forgotten, lost in the easy rhythm of each other's company. The tension between them picked up and Paige swore Azzi was doing it on purpose, so it became less about the game and more about Paige trying to control herself.

Azzi eventually won, but it wasn’t really a surprise. Paige didn’t protest, though. She might’ve let Azzi take the lead intentionally the last two times she bowled, but she played it off like she was disappointed.

“Bullshit!” Paige groaned, pretending to sulk. “I let you win!”

Azzi smirked, leaning back in her seat as she wiped her hands. “Sure you did,” she teased. “Let’s go with that.”

Paige rolled her eyes, but she couldn’t suppress the small grin tugging at her lips. It was one of those rare, easy moments, the kind that felt like nothing could ruin it.

They eventually left the bowling alley, stepping out into the cool night air. The sounds of the city were alive around them, but they felt distant, as if the world had shrunk to just the two of them. The hum of their playful banter lingered as they leaned against Paige's car, the faint glow of a nearby streetlamp casting soft light over them.

Azzi slipped into the small space between Paige and the car, her arms instinctively wrapping around Paige’s neck. Paige looked at her, her gaze flickering between Azzi’s eyes and the way they darted, almost unconsciously, to her lips.

"You know you can kiss me, right?" Paige asked, her voice soft but teasing, her smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

Azzi smiled slightly, her cheeks warming. "I’m not supposed to," she murmured, her words quiet for only the two of them.

Paige tilted her head, inching closer as her eyes sparkled with amusement. "Mmm, why not?"

Azzi hesitated, her lips parting as if to respond, but no words came. Finally, she said, "I have a timeline I’m supposed to follow."

Paige chuckled, as she leaned even closer, her breath brushing against Azzi's skin. "We were never really good at sticking to plans, were we?" Her voice dropped but her tone stayed playful.

Azzi’s resolve wavered, her heart rate picking up as Paige’s lips hovered so close, teasing her with their proximity. Her fingers tightened slightly around Paige’s neck, her voice finally breaking through the tension, "Kiss me then."

Paige didn’t hesitate, instantly leaning down, her lips meeting Azzi’s in a soft kiss. The initial touch was slow, tentative, but it only took a moment for the kiss to deepen, the rhythm between them syncing as if they’d been doing this for years.

Paige’s hand found its way to Azzi’s back, holding her closer as the kiss stretched on, each second feeling longer than the last. When they finally broke apart, Paige’s voice was low, a little breathless as she mumbled against Azzi’s lips, “I thought we were supposed to be moving slow.”

Azzi’s smile was slow and knowing as she pulled Paige back in for another kiss, her arms tightening around Paige’s neck. She didn’t answer right away, instead kissing Paige again, missing the way her lips felt way too much. When she did pull back, just slightly, her voice was soft, but certain. “This is slow.”

Paige didn’t say anything else. She simply melted back into the kiss, her hands tracing the familiar lines of Azzi’s back as time seemed to slow around them. Everything about the night, about their connection, felt like it was falling into place—slowly, but surely.

After what felt like hours—though it was probably only a couple of minutes—Azzi finally pulled away from the kiss, her lips swollen, her breath shaky. She let out a light laugh, trying to catch her breath. “Alright,” she said softly, still holding Paige close, “we need to stop.”

Paige, still a little dazed, just looked at her, eyes full of admiration. She didn’t argue. There was no hesitation in her response. “Okay,” she nodded, her voice soft but firm, clearly completely comfortable with whatever pace Azzi wanted to set for them.

Azzi gave her one more quick kiss, a brief moment that made Paige’s heart race again before Azzi’s hands gently pressed against her chest, pushing her back softly. Paige couldn’t help but smile, the corners of her lips curling up in a way that Azzi couldn’t possibly miss.

Paige opened the passenger door, stepping back and letting Azzi slide into the seat. The moment felt easy, natural—like they had both found their way to something they hadn’t even known they were looking for.

Paige rounded the front of the car and got in the driver’s seat. She didn’t rush, not really. They both knew it was late, but there was no urgency in how they moved. As she started the engine and pulled away from the parking lot, the drive back to campus felt peaceful, even with the soft hum of the tires on the road. It wasn’t filled with heavy conversation; it didn’t need to be. There was something perfect about just being there, together, in the quiet moments.

December 2022

The suite was alive with the sound of laughter, music, and the occasional shout from one of the drinking games happening in every corner as the team celebrated their holiday party they decided to throw with just them. It was a whirlwind of holiday cheer, albeit the slightly messy, drunken kind. Twinkling fairy lights were strung haphazardly across the ceiling, their warm glow clashing with the flashing colors of a mini disco ball someone had set up in the corner, and the room had a faint scene of spiked eggnog lingering in the air.

Paige, leaning against the counter with a cup in hand, was watching Azzi from across the room. The chaos of the holiday party swirled around her—laughter, music, and the occasional crash of something hitting the floor—but her focus stayed locked on Azzi.

Azzi was deep in a game of flip cup, her competitiveness on full display as she high-fived Aubrey after every successful flip. The room erupted in cheers as her team scored another win, and she flashed a huge grin. Mid-celebration, she glanced over and caught Paige staring. Her eyebrow quirked, and a playful smirk spread across her lips. Paige rolled her eyes, feigning disinterest, and took a sip of her drink, hoping to appear unaffected.

Nika slid up beside her, laughing as she nudged Paige’s shoulder. “You’re so down bad, twin.”

Paige shot her a glare. “No, I’m not.”

Nika snorted, crossing her arms. “Right, because casually ogling your ‘not girlfriend yet’ all night is totally normal behavior. You act like you can’t go talk to her.”

Paige shrugged, attempting to play it cool. “Just keeping my distance.”

Nika raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

Paige sighed, mumbling as she glanced at her drink. “She still has this no-sex rule, and I’m a little drunk. Just trying to make my life easier, you know?”

Before Nika could respond, as if on cue, Azzi made her way over. Without a word, she reached out and took Paige’s cup from her hand, taking a long sip. Azzi’s casual dominance sent a ripple of heat through Paige, who could only stare as Azzi set the cup back down on the counter with a smile.

“Thanks for that,” Azzi said, her voice light but her eyes were hazy, a clear indication of her being a little more than tipsy.

“You could’ve asked,” Paige said, crossing her arms and attempting to sound unimpressed.

Azzi leaned in slightly, her voice dropping just enough to mess with Paige. “Where’s the fun in that?”

Nika let out an exaggerated groan. “Ya’ll are ridiculous. Just fuck already!”

Paige rolled her eyes, muttering, “Mind your business.” But the small smile tugging at her lips gave her away.

Nika rolled her eyes, muttering something about how she couldn’t deal with them and she was fixing this before the end of the night, before walking away to join the chaos on the other side of the room. The second she was gone, Azzi turned her full attention back to Paige.

Azzi stepped closer and she wrapped her arms around Paige’s neck, her fingers tangling in the soft hair at the nape of her neck. The gentle pressure of her touch made Paige clench her jaw, and before she could say anything, Azzi leaned in, brushing her lips against Paige’s in a slow, deliberate kiss.

Paige exhaled softly into the kiss, her hands instinctively finding Azzi’s waist before sliding lower. Her fingers grazed Azzi’s hip, before she squeezed her ass pulling her closer. With a playful smirk, Paige muttered against Azzi’s lips, “I think we should take Nika’s advice.”

Azzi smiled into the kiss, her voice low. “Should we?”

Paige didn’t hesitate, her lips brushing against Azzi’s again as she murmured a breathy, “Mhmm,” before deepening the kiss. The room around them seemed to fade away, the party’s noise becoming a distant hum as they got lost in each other.

But just as Paige was settling into the moment, Azzi abruptly pulled back, her hands slipping away from Paige’s neck. Her eyes sparkled as she took a deliberate step back.

“I’m sure you would like that,” Azzi said, her tone light and teasing as she grabbed Paige’s drink and turned on her heel.

“Wait, what?” Paige blinked, momentarily stunned as Azzi began walking away, her hips swaying in the process.

Azzi glanced back over her shoulder, smirking. “You’ll survive.”

Paige groaned, leaning back against the counter as she watched Azzi immerse herself back in the game. Her hand ran through her hair in frustration, a smile tugging at her lips despite herself.

…

Later that night the suite had somehow descended into even more chaos. At Nika’s insistence—“To spice things up!” she had declared—they decided to start doing body shots. No one could quite remember how the idea came about, but with the amount of alcohol flowing, no one was questioning it too much either.

It began with Lou and Dorka, the two veterans claiming none of them could drink like foreigners, laughing uncontrollably as Lou struggled to stay still while Dorka leaned over her, slurping the drink out of her belly button with dramatic flair. The room erupted into cheers and whistles, fueling the competitive energy. Jana and Ayanna, eager to join the fun, followed suit. The two freshmen stumbled through the motions, Jana’s laugh infectious as they fumbled with the lime and nearly spilled the salt everywhere.

Then it was Paige and Nika’s turn. Paige smirked as she stepped up, her confidence on full display as Nika flopped onto the counter dramatically, taking off her shirt completely in the name of competition. The crowd around them hooted and hollered as Paige leaned down expertly, sucking the drink from Nika’s belly button, licked the salt from her skin, and grabbed the lime with her teeth, making sure to avoid Nika’s lips in the process.

“Okay, I see you!” Nika teased, sitting up and swatting Paige playfully on the shoulder as the group burst into cheers. Paige laughed, grabbing a towel to wipe her face, when she noticed the next pair stepping up.

It was Aaliyah and Azzi.

The energy in the room shifted slightly for Paige as Azzi took her spot on the counter, her movements slow. Aaliyah leaned down to start, but the moment she did, Azzi’s eyes found Paige across the room. The heat in her gaze was unmistakable—a playful challenge mixed with something deeper.

Paige froze, her breath catching as she tried—and failed—to focus on Aaliyah going through the motions. Her jaw clenched tightly, the tension building with each passing second. She shouldn’t be jealous; it was Aaliyah for christ sake, her teammate and friend. But watching Aaliyah run her tongue up Azzi’s stomach, tracing a path that Paige desperately wanted to follow herself, was more upsetting than she wanted to admit.

Azzi knew exactly what she was doing. That much was clear in the way her gaze stayed locked on Paige the entire time, her smirk widening as Aaliyah reached for the lime. When Azzi tilted her head slightly, her expression was daring, almost taunting.

Paige’s jaw clinched as Aaliyah leaned in, and she swore she saw Azzi adjust ever so slightly, ensuring the lime was far enough in her mouth that Aaliyah’s lips brushed hers when she grabbed it. The brief contact drew a soft laugh from Aaliyah, but Azzi didn’t react—her focus remained on Paige, her smirk now carrying a touch of satisfaction.

Nika nudged Paige, grinning knowingly. “Damn she’s good. You gonna let her one-up you like that?”

Paige shook her head, her jaw tightening as she forced herself to look away, her mind racing as heat spread through her.

The body shots continued, with different combinations of teammates stepping up and cheers erupting after each turn. Laughter filled the room, and the alcohol buzzed through everyone’s veins, amplifying the chaos. Just when Paige thought they’d finally moved past the game, Nika, deciding to be an instigator tonight, raised her voice.

“Wait, I don’t think Azzi’s done a body shot yet!” she declared, her eyes gleaming with mischief.

Paige immediately shot Nika a warning look. “Don’t even—”

Before she could finish, Nika grinned and gave Paige a firm push forward. “Azzi, go ahead!”

Paige groaned, stumbling slightly but catching herself. “Nope. Not happening,” she said firmly, backing away. There was no way she was letting Azzi have that kind of control over her in front of everyone. She knew exactly how Azzi operated when she had Paige like that and she wasn’t about to play into it.

Unfortunately, the rest of the team quickly caught on to Nika’s scheme.

“Paige! Paige! Paige!” they started chanting, their voices growing louder with each passing second.

Paige rolled her eyes, exhaling sharply as the chants filled the room. She glanced at Azzi, who stood off to the side, arms crossed, her amusement barely concealed. The glint in her eye said it all: she was thoroughly enjoying this and the ball was in Paige’s court.

“Fine!” Paige yelled, throwing her hands up in surrender. The room erupted in cheers as she climbed onto the counter, muttering under her breath about how she was going to kill Nika later.

She lifted her shirt over her sports bra, exposing her toned stomach. Ice, of course, took over the role of bartender, grinning as she poured way too much liquor into Paige’s belly button. Faking a “oops,” as the liquid pooled messily out of the sides. Ice added a long salt line up Paige’s torso for good measure.

Azzi stepped forward, her expression calm, but her eyes said otherwise. She grabbed a lime from the counter and walked over to Paige. Holding the lime between her fingers, she leaned in just close enough for Paige to catch the faint scent of her perfume.

“Here,” Azzi said softly, her voice low and a little teasing as she handed the lime to Paige.

Paige huffed, reluctantly taking the lime and placing it between her lips. The weight of everyone’s attention was pressing down on her, but it was nothing compared to the way Azzi was looking at her.

The room fell silent, each teammate watching. Most of them had been waiting for Paige and Azzi to officially get together, and this felt like a nudge in the right direction. Still, there were a few stifled snickers and whispered comments about how this was likely to be both hilarious and a little disgusting to watch.

Azzi stepped closer, her calm composure somehow making everything feel ten times more heated. Her eyes raked over Paige’s body, studying her with an infuriating mix of amusement and intrigue. It was as if Paige was a puzzle Azzi had all the time in the world to figure out. Then, she leaned down, her breath warm against Paige’s skin as she took her time, drawing out every second.

Paige’s jaw tightened as Azzi’s lips brushed against her stomach, soft and extremely slow. Azzi didn’t just drink the liquor pooling in Paige’s belly button; she made a deliberate effort to catch every drop that had spilled from Ice’s purposeful overpour. The slight pressure of her lips and the way her tongue darted over Paige’s skin sent jolts of heat coursing through Paige’s body.

The room was still, but Paige barely noticed. She was hyper-aware of every movement Azzi made. As Azzi worked her way up, trailing along the line of salt, she slowed even further, letting her tongue drag against Paige’s skin in agonizingly unhurried strokes. Occasionally, she’d pause to suck lightly, never enough to make it obvious to everyone else, but enough form Paige to feel it.

By the time Azzi reached the lime, Paige was unbearably warm, her entire body tight with tension. Azzi stopped, their faces now just inches apart. Her smile returned as her eyes locked onto Paige’s. The room seemed to hold its breath as Azzi leaned in, closing the small gap.

When she finally took the lime, her tongue deliberately brushed against Paige’s lips, the contact sending a sharp jolt through Paige. Azzi pulled the lime away effortlessly, stepping back with a gleam in her eyes.

The room exploded into cheers and laughter, but Paige remained frozen, still reeling from what just happened. Azzi, seemingly composed, chewed the lime and shot Paige a quick wink before walking away, leaving Paige sitting there, flushed and completely on edge.

…

Paige had gone painfully quiet, her usual banter replaced by soft sips from her drink. She kept her focus on anything but Azzi, trying to blend into the chaos of the room while her mind raced.

Eventually, Azzi wandered over and took a seat next to her, sliding in close like she always did. The casual intimacy of it only made Paige’s restraint feel more fragile. Azzi leaned in, her shoulder brushing Paige’s, her presence impossible to ignore.

“You’re awfully quiet,” Azzi teased, her voice low and warm, but Paige still didn’t look at her.

Paige exhaled sharply through her nose and muttered, “Az, you need to chill.”

Azzi tilted her head, a small, amused smile playing at her lips. “Why?” she asked, her voice laced with curiosity.

Paige finally turned her head, her blue eyes meeting Azzi’s. She looked almost exasperated, her jaw tight as she said, “Because I’m trying to be respectful.”

The simple statement made Azzi pause, a flush of warmth spreading through her. She hummed softly, the sound tinged with something deeper, something more tender.

It wasn’t the first time Paige had stopped herself, holding back for Azzi’s sake, but it never failed to do things to her. The way Paige clenched her jaw, her whole body tense as she fought to respect Azzi’s boundaries, only made it harder for Azzi to keep her own.

Azzi’s resolve was strongest when Paige was being playful or teasing, when she was being cocky, but it crumbled every time Paige was gentle. Every time Paige immediately pulled back when Azzi said “stop,” or when Azzi could see the physical effort it took for Paige to keep her hands from wandering, it made Azzi’s heart race.

And yet, despite how much it turned her on, it also made her feel safe—like Paige wasn’t just after the thrill but genuinely cared about her comfort. Azzi didn’t say anything for a moment, letting the warmth settle over her.

“You’re making it very hard to be chill, you know,” Azzi finally said, leaning in just enough for her voice to brush against Paige’s ear.

Paige’s grip tightened on her drink as she glanced at Azzi. “Yeah, well, you’re not exactly making it easy, either.”

Azzi leaned back slightly, her lips curving into a smile as she studied Paige’s face. Then, without breaking eye contact, she said, “Let’s go, then.”

Paige blinked, caught off guard. “Wait, what—”

But before she could finish, Azzi was already grabbing her hand, pulling her up from the couch. Paige barely had time to process what was happening as Azzi wove them through the chaotic room, her grip firm.

“Az, hold on—” Paige tried, but her voice faltered when Azzi looked back at her, .

As they neared the door, Nika spotted them leaving and smirked, her voice cutting through the noise of the room. “Use protection!” she called out, loud enough for everyone to hear.

The room erupted in laughter, with a few drunken cheers and whistles echoing after them. Paige groaned, her cheeks flushing as she glanced back at the team, who were thoroughly entertained. “Nika, shut up!” she shouted over her shoulder, but her words only fueled more laughter.

Azzi, however, didn’t miss a beat. She simply smirked, holding the door open for Paige as if they weren’t leaving the party under a spotlight.. “Ignore her,” she said smoothly, tugging Paige out into the quiet hallway.

…

As Azzi entered the room, she immediately moved toward the small speaker on her nightstand, connecting her phone to play some music. If any of her suitemates decided to come back, at least the music could cover up some of the sounds that might slip through.

Paige slipped into the bathroom, the soft sound of water splashing in the background as she dabbed a bit on her face. Azzi, now settled on the bed, let out a quiet laugh as she heard this taking place. The blonde was always so intentional about controlling herself, but tonight she was visibly trying to calm the fire that had been building.

Paige emerged from the bathroom, wiping her face with a towel, her expression soft as she took in the sight of Azzi. Without thinking, Azzi pulled off her shirt, tossing it aside before laying back on the bed, her body relaxed, her eyes never leaving Paige. She tilted her head slightly as she looked up, studying Paige with that familiar, intense gaze that made Paige's heart race.

Paige stood at the foot of the bed for a moment, just watching. Her chest rose and fell with deep, measured breaths, her lips still slightly parted as she tried to compose herself. Azzi could see it all—how Paige was struggling to maintain control, how the tension between them had grown unbearable for her.

Azzi’s lips curled into a sly smile as she sat up slightly, reaching out and taking Paige’s hand. Her touch was gentle but firm, pulling Paige toward her.

Now Paige was hovering above Azzi, her hands planted on either side of Azzi’s head. The air between them felt electric, charged with all the things they weren’t saying. Azzi’s dark eyes locked onto Paige’s, searching for something unspoken, while her free hand lightly grazed the back of Paige’s neck.

Neither of them moved to break the silence. As they just looked at each other, savoring the moment.

“You’re thinking too much,” Azzi said softly, her voice a gentle murmur that broke through the tension.

Paige let out a shaky breath, her gaze flickering down to Azzi’s lips. “Yeah, well, I have a lot to think about. Trying to control myself” she muttered, her tone almost defensive.

Azzi let out a soft laugh, the sound warm and inviting. “You don’t need to.” Her hand on Paige’s neck slid upward, her fingers threading into Paige’s hair. “So stop thinking.”

Paige’s resolve wavered as her body instinctively leaned closer, her breath mingling with Azzi’s. Their faces were so close now that Paige could feel the warmth radiating from Azzi’s skin, the subtle scent of her perfume making her head spin.

“Az...” Paige started, but her voice faltered as Azzi’s thumb gently traced a line along her jaw.

“I want you Paige” Azzi whispered, her tone teasing yet tender.

Paige didn’t respond—not with words, anyway. Instead, she dipped her head, her lips finally brushing against Azzi’s in a slow, deliberate kiss that made time feel like it had stopped altogether.

The kiss was soft at first, almost tentative, but it quickly deepened as Paige’s desire took over. Azzi’s fingers trailed up to the back of Paige’s neck, tangling in her hair as their rhythm fell into sync. Paige lowered herself a little more onto Azzi, the need to be closer to her growing with every second.

They stayed like that for what felt like an eternity—kissing, breathing each other in, and forgetting the world outside Azzi’s room. Paige wasn’t in any rush; she was silently waiting, letting Azzi take the lead as she had ever since they started seeing each other. It was an unspoken understanding between them, and Paige respected it deeply.

Their kisses broke intermittently, a few times when they were taking clothes off, tossing them aside with ease, and again when they paused, foreheads pressed together, just looking at one another. The space between them felt different, charged with the weight of everything they hadn’t yet said but felt so deeply.

Eventually, Paige leaned down, her lips trailing down Azzi’s jaw to her neck. Her movements slowed and purposeful, as she left soft, visible marks. Azzi’s breath hitched each time, her hands gripping Paige’s head as she pulled her closer.

“Paige,” Azzi murmured, her voice breathy and laced with warmth.

Paige hummed against Azzi’s skin, the vibration making Azzi shiver. “Hmm?” she responded, her mouth never leaving Azzi’s neck, where she continued her soft assault, her lips and teeth working together.

Azzi arched slightly into Paige, her voice quieter now, like the words were slipping out without her realizing. “God, I missed you,” she breathed.

Paige stilled for just a moment, letting Azzi’s words wash over her before continuing, her kisses growing more intense. “I missed you too,” she finally whispered against Azzi’s skin, her voice low and sincere.

She trailed her lips over Azzi’s neck and down to her chest savoring every moment. As Paige moved, she slid her knee carefully between Azzi’s legs, applying the lightest pressure. Still, she made sure to pause, never moving further without Azzi’s explicit permission.

Azzi’s reactions were everything as Paige continued—her breaths hitching, her body shifting beneath Paige’s as her voice filled the room. She wasn’t quiet about how Paige made her feel, her soft murmurs of “so good” and the way she whispered Paige’s name fueling Paige’s every move.

Eventually, Azzi’s tone shifted, her voice taking on a pleading edge as she breathed out, “Paige…” It wasn’t just a name—it was a request, a need, a call that Paige couldn’t ignore.

Paige kissed her way back up Azzi’s neck, her lips brushing over every sensitive spot she knew by heart before finally meeting Azzi’s mouth again in a brief, passionate kiss. When she pulled back, Paige didn’t say anything at first, just stared down at Azzi, taking her in.

Azzi’s eyes were half-lidded, her pupils blown, her gaze soft and hazy as she looked up at Paige. The sight made something inside Paige swell with affection, and she couldn’t help but smile.

Azzi took a deep inhale at the sight of Paige’s warm smile, and her hands slid up to cup Paige’s face. “Why are you looking at me like that?” she murmured, a hint of a smile tugging at her lips.

Paige just shook her head slightly, leaning into Azzi’s touch. “Because you’re so perfect,” she whispered, her voice thick, before leaning down to kiss her again.

Azzi’s voice was soft but laced with need as she muttered out a breathy, “I need to feel you.”

Paige’s heart skipped at the words, and she nodded, her lips curving into a tender smile. Without breaking eye contact, she let her hand trail down, her movements deliberate and filled with care. The moment her fingers landed exactly where Azzi needed her, Azzi’s head tipped back slightly, her lips parting as a soft sigh escaped her, her eyes rolling back briefly before fluttering closed.

When Azzi gathered herself enough to open her eyes again, she pulled Paige closer, her arms wrapping tightly around Paige’s neck as her lips brushed against Paige’s ear. Her voice was a mix of raw emotion and pleasure as she whispered, “Fuck, I love you so much.”

The intensity of her words wasn’t lost on Paige. The “fuck” was an honest reaction to the sensation coursing through her, but the “I love you” carried the weight of something far deeper—a love that had grown and solidified between them over time. Paige stilled for just a moment, her chest tightening with an overwhelming mix of emotions, before she leaned down to kiss Azzi softly, murmuring against her lips, “I love you too. Always.”

As Paige whispered her love for Azzi, her soft touch never faltered, her movements gentle as she moved in and out curling her fingers with intention as she did so. Their lips met again in a slow, lingering kiss, their gazes locking whenever they pulled back for air. The intensity between them was palpable, yet it was laced with tenderness, a quiet understanding of the depth they shared.

Azzi, completely lost in the moment, clung to Paige as soft gasps and whispered praises fell from her lips. “God, baby…you feel so good,” she murmured, her voice trembling. “I missed you so much.”

Paige smiled against Azzi’s lips, her own heart racing at Azzi’s words. She kissed her again, trailing her lips down to Azzi’s neck and back, each touch meant to remind Azzi of how deeply she was cherished.

Amidst the overwhelming way she was feeling, Azzi’s gaze found Paige’s once more, and she froze for a moment. The way Paige looked down at her—so full of admiration, care, and unshakable love—made her chest feeling like it was about to explode. Her breathing hitched, and she struggled trying to make words escape her lips.

“Be my…” Azzi whispered, her voice breaking as her body reacted to Paige’s touch. “Fuck..fuck, Paige…be my girlfriend please.”

Paige stilled, her own breath catching at the words. She leaned in, resting her forehead against Azzi’s, their lips just a breath apart as she whispered back, her voice soft but full of certainty, “I thought this already meant I was.”

Azzi let out a soft laugh, the sound filled with relief and joy. “You are,” she murmured, pulling Paige into another kiss, her hands tangling in her hair as they melted further into one another, the moment now carrying the weight of something undeniably permanent.

As Paige shifted her focus, her movements became quicker, and Azzi’s soft sighs turned into something louder, something more unrestrained. The music played in the background, but it did little to mask the words spilling from Azzi’s lips—fragments of need and pleasure slipping through her control.

“I forgot how good you feel,” Azzi murmured breathily, her voice trembling with emotion and sensation. “You fuck me so good Paige…yes…right there, baby.”

Paige’s lips curved into a smile as she focused her attention, her eyes never leaving Azzi’s face, wanting to watch every reaction. Azzi’s body arched into her touch, her words becoming incoherent until all that remained were gasps, broken and heavy, echoing in the small room.

Paige leaned down, brushing her lips over Azzi’s ear and whispering, “You’re so beautiful like this.” The soft praise drew a shiver from Azzi, who clung to Paige with everything she had, completely lost in the way Paige was making her feel.

Knowing how much her words always affected Azzi, Paige didn’t stop. She kept her voice low, soothing yet making it clear she was in control, knowing exactly how to unravel the girl under her. “You’re doing so good for me Az,” Paige murmured, kissing the edge of Azzi’s jaw. “Taking it so well, baby. You sound so pretty… feel even better.”

Azzi’s breaths grew uneven, her body trembling beneath Paige’s as the words sank into her. Every whispered praise seemed to fuel the fire coursing through her, her chest heaving as her nails dug into Paige’s back.

“Paige baby…” Azzi gasped, her voice breaking as she arched into her. Paige smirked softly against Azzi’s skin, loving the way Azzi felt underneath her, feeling her body shake from the way she was making her feel.

When Paige shifted her pace just slightly, a cry tore from Azzi’s throat, her hands clutching Paige tighter. “Oh my God—fuck Paige!” she all but screamed, her voice echoing over the music in the background.

The sound of her name, so desperate and raw, only spurred Paige on, her lips finding Azzi’s again to swallow her gasps as she spilled onto Paige’s hand. Azzi’s nails raked down Paige’s back, leaving trails of heat in their wake, her entire body trembling as she clung to the blonde, utterly consumed by the moment.

…

A couple of hours later, they were still tangled in each other, their bodies glistening, hair a mess, and faint marks scattered over their skin. Azzi was straddling Paige as she rolled her hips against the strap between them, her hands threading through blonde hair as their lips moved in sync, the room filled with the quiet sounds.

The moment was interrupted by a loud banging on Azzi’s door. Without missing a beat, both of them yelled simultaneously, “Go away!”

From the other side, Ines’s muffled voice broke through. “Azzi, I’m sleepy!”

Paige groaned internally but didn’t pause, immediately realizing they sent Ines on purpose, knowing Azzi had a soft spot for her and would struggle to ignore her. Paige didn’t say anything, though, pushing her hips deeper into Azzi, making the brunette gasp softly. “Ignore her,” Paige murmured against Azzi’s lips, her voice low and persuasive as she moved again, drawing a quiet, shaky breath from Azzi.

For a moment, it worked. Azzi threw her head back, her chest rising and falling as she bit her lip, trying to stifle the sounds Paige was coaxing from her. But then Inez groaned loudly, knocking again with more urgency. “Azzziii!”

Azzi let out a reluctant laugh, her voice breathless as she called out, “Okay, Nes, I’m sorry!”

The faint sound of Inez’s footsteps retreating down the hall signaled she was finally gone.

Paige’s movements never stopped, only slowed to quiet the sounds, her hands on Azzi’s ass lifting her before bringing her back down as Azzi quieted herself. Azzi leaned forward, capturing Paige’s lips in a soft kiss, her hips moving more deliberately now, drawing them back into their rhythm.

Breaking the kiss, Azzi whispered breathlessly, “Help me finish, so we can be done, baby.”

Paige nodded, her lips brushing against Azzi’s as she murmured, “I got you.” Her hand moved in between them, her thumb circling softly, encouraging Azzi to keep moving. Paige met every roll of Azzi’s hips with her own, their rhythm building as the tension between them grew again.

Azzi clenched her jaw, trying to stay quiet, her breaths coming in sharp, shallow bursts. But as the feeling overwhelmed her, she bit down gently on Paige’s shoulder, her fingers scraping along Paige’s back as her body trembled with release. A soft whimper escaped her lips as she slumped forward against Paige, now completely spent.

Paige held her gently, kissing the top of Azzi’s head as she whispered, “You’re so amazing.” She slowly eased out of Azzi as she laid her on the bed, her movements tender, careful not to jostle her too much. Standing, Paige grabbed a towel, her gaze lingering on Azzi, whose body was still glowing in the aftermath.

Azzi’s eyes fluttered open just enough to find Paige. She offered a small, satisfied smile, her voice barely above a whisper. “You spoil me.”

Paige grinned softly, leaning down to press a kiss to her forehead. “Of course.”

Once Paige cleaned up, she returned to the bed, slipping under the covers immediately pulling Azzi into her arms. Azzi shifted closer, tangling their legs together as her fingers found their way to Paige’s hair, gently detangling it in slow, soothing strokes.

They talked quietly in the dim light, their voices soft. Azzi let out a small laugh, wincing slightly. “I’m already sore,” she murmured, her tone playful despite the complaint.

Paige chuckled softly, pressing a kiss to Azzi’s temple. “M’sorry, baby,” she whispered, her voice warm.

Azzi laughed again, shaking her head as she replied, “No, you’re not.”

A grin spread across Paige’s face as she kissed Azzi’s forehead, her hold on her tightening. They continued their quiet conversation, voices dropping lower with each passing moment as sleep began to tug at them.

Tangled in one another, Paige’s voice softened to a murmur. “I love you, Az,” she said, her words carrying the weight of her heart.

Azzi’s fingers paused in Paige’s hair as she whispered back, “I love you more, pretty.” Her voice was thick with sincerity, both of their words lingering in the air as they drifted off, their breaths falling in sync.

…

When Azzi stirred awake the next morning, she let out a low groan, stretching her arms over her head as her body protested from the night before. Blinking the sleep from her eyes, she frowned, her hand brushing the empty side of the bed. Paige never got up early—it wasn’t her thing.

She sat up, glancing around and noticing her door slightly ajar. Confused but curious, she pulled on a shirt and a pair of sweats, padding out into the living room. Where she saw Paige, half-asleep and slouched on the couch with her laptop balanced precariously on her legs. Azzi chuckled softly at the sight.

“What are you doing?” she asked, her voice still thick with sleep.

Paige blinked up at her, a small, sheepish smile tugging at her lips. “I told Geno I’d send him film notes for the next team we’re playing,” she mumbled, stifling a yawn.

Azzi’s gaze softened, her heart swelling at Paige’s dedication. She walked over, shaking her head with an amused smile. “It’s too early for this,” she said, gently closing the laptop on Paige’s lap and setting it on the table. “You look exhausted.”

Paige opened her mouth to protest, but Azzi didn’t give her the chance. She sat down on the couch, tugging Paige toward her. Paige allowed herself to be guided, sighing as Azzi pulled her close, positioning them so they were lying back slightly, with Paige resting her head on Azzi’s chest as Azzi rested her head on the back of the couch.

“You need sleep more than Geno needs those notes right now. You can do them later,” Azzi teased, her fingers automatically threading through Paige’s hair.

“Mmm, probably,” Paige murmured, her voice muffled against Azzi’s chest as her body relaxed entirely in Azzi’s embrace.

The two of them laid there in a peaceful silence, Azzi’s fingers gently threading through Paige’s hair as Paige let her eyes fall shut. Slowly, the steady rhythm of Azzi’s heartbeat lulled her back to sleep, her body fully relaxed.

Azzi glanced down after a while, realizing Paige had drifted off. Her lips curved into a soft smile as she leaned down to press a tender kiss to the top of Paige’s head. Watching her sleep like this, so vulnerable and utterly at ease, tugged at Azzi’s heartstrings.

It reminded her of something Paige had said a while ago, before they had things figured out—they were sprawled out in Azzi’s room, homework abandoned on the desk because Azzi had insisted on cuddling instead. Paige had eventually relented but only on one condition: she got to lay on Azzi’s chest.

Azzi had teased her about it at the time, but she remembered how Paige started to ramble, her voice soft as her thoughts spilled out randomly.

“Laying on somebody’s chest is probably one of the most intimate things,” Paige had mused, her cheek resting against Azzi’s chest.

“Oh really?” Azzi had replied, laughing lightly, not expecting the seriousness in Paige’s response.

“Yeah,” Paige had hummed, her voice tinged with thoughtfulness. “You’re just lying there, probably with somebody you like a lot, and the way their heartbeat sounds calms you down, relaxes you completely in a way that’s probably not usual. It feels so... exposed, I guess. You're so close you can hear the one thing keeping the person you love alive. I don’t know, it just seems kinda crazy.”

Azzi’s heart had stuttered in her chest then, and Paige had immediately noticed, her lips curving into a teasing smile as she pointed it out. Azzi had turned red, hastily shoving Paige off her chest with a grumbled “You’re so annoying,” though her cheeks burned for the rest of the day.

Now, as Azzi looked down at this version of Paige—the one she loved so deeply, who was no longer just her best friend but her girlfriend—a grin spread across her face. This was the same girl who had turned her world upside down with her rambles, her teasing, her tender way of seeing the world.

Gently, Azzi tightened her arms around Paige, holding her closer, her grin softening. She pressed another kiss to Paige’s temple, letting herself savor this quiet moment, this piece of intimacy Paige had described so perfectly. It really was crazy, Azzi thought. But it was also perfect.