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#THIS BOY HAS GOT THE BALLS
shijiujun · 19 days
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"I like you."
"W-What? I don't understand."
HE TOTALLY DOES
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methoughtsphantom · 7 months
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Does this count as kidnapping???
A clockwork apprentice Danny that has to fake Jason’s death because he accidentally meddled in the event leading up to it and now he has to act fast because he literally can hear Batman’s running steps catching up to him so in spectacular fashion Danny panics, goes “shit shit shit” and puts Jason in the ghost version of a coma but like expert level pumps him up with so much ectoplasm the kid legit dies for a hot minute there.
…It makes Batman think his kid really is dead like he is supposed to so not all is bad, the timeline is back on track.
It’s just that now Danny can’t leave Jason to be be buried in the ground like he was meant to be originally, instead he waits until no one is looking to snatch the kid up and take him with him to the infinite realms.
Jason is legit convinced he was kidnapped.
Jason: who are you and why did you kidnap me???
Danny: what— kid I didn’t kidnapped you, I saved you
Jason: likely story
Danny: really kid I’m not kidding this is not a kidnapping
Jason: well then can I go home
Danny:
Danny: no
Jason: fucking figures
Danny: in my defense when I found you you were already kidnapped
Jason: so? kidnapping me from my kidnappers doesn’t make u better
Danny:
Danny: well it makes me the better kidnapper
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The Response
Part Two of The Interview [Part One] [Ao3]
With no exact time given by Robin, Eddie's left to kill time. He drags himself from the YouTube spiral to try and track down Steve on social media. After two hours, he concludes that either Steve has his (and official Corroded Coffin's) socials blocked, or Steve just doesn't have any. He's a bit baffled that people can even find Steve to send hate mail to him.
He shoots a text to Gareth. Can you find Steve on any socials?
He gets an instant reply.
DO NOT CONTACT!!!
WAIT FOR RESPONSE
DONOT MAKE THISS WORSE MUNSON
Eddie frowns down at his phone but doesn't argue. He probably would make it worse. He sends back 'k' and looks back to the laptop. Watches it auto-refresh but Robin's feed hasn't changed.
God, what will Steve have to say?
It's mostly true, that Eddie hasn't thought about Steve in years. That's been deliberate. Eddie was so furious back then. Robin wasn't wrong about him venting his feelings into a song, but how was he supposed to know Hey Steve would be the song the catch the ear of the people? And yeah, the lyrics are very unflattering.
A lot of their first songs were filled with rage. The whole first album is just their collective high school experiences. Songs about growing up in Hawkins and how shit that was for them, a song about Eddie's complicated feelings towards his dad, songs about dungeons and dragons disguised as fantasy ballads, things like that. And, of course, Hey Steve.
He can admit that years ago he reevaluated the lyrics and found it to be more harsh than was warranted. But he figured there was no point worrying about that. People exaggerate in songs all the time. The song is out, people still plead for it to be played during encore performances. Eddie hadn't thought it was hurting anyone to play it.
Hey Steve had taken Eddie less than two days to write. He did almost nothing for those two days except write. Fuck. He was still just a dumb kid when he wrote it, barely graduated high school. And the reason for writing it...
Eddie had know Steve wasn't out to his parents when he'd asked Steve to essentially runaway with him. Steve had worried about things like money, and living situations, and getting food. It had all sounded like excuses to Eddie back then. Like Steve was picking the safety of Hawkins and his parents' house over going out into the world to be with Eddie freely.
They'd fought about it. The worst fight they'd ever had. Yet, here Eddie is, a decade later and unable to recall anything that was actually said. Just a summary of that conversation exists in his mind, now. Steve wanting to wait. To save more money now that his hours at the grocery store would be changing from part time to full with him no longer being in school and able to work the morning shifts. Wait to get his car fully transferred to his name from his parents.
All things that adult Eddie can now see as reasonable. Jesus Fucking Christ. He remembers he'd given Steve some sort of ultimatum. He was leaving on the last Grey Hound from Hawkins to Indy. Steve could meet him at the bus stop or stay, but Eddie was going, with or without him.
Steve had shouted back. He knows they just got louder and nastier until Steve finally told him that he would be going without him, then, because they were over. Even as angry as Eddie had been, he'd held out hope. But that last bus left Hawkins with Eddie on it and no sign of Steve in sight.
So Eddie did what he did best. Channeled that hurt into anger and wrote a song. Never in a million years did he think that, in the very first bar they played at in Indy, they'd meet a man who wanted to take a chance with them and get them a demo. All they needed to do was get from Indy to LA. Eddie had a van and the motivation. The next year of his life was too busy for him to even think, much less worry about Steve and his breakup.
Well, that was a lie. He thought about it constantly and shoved the thoughts aside as quickly as they came. Easier to do when he had no way to check up on Steve. He left Hawkins with no laptop and a pay-per-text flip phone he'd bought at a gas station. Wayne tried his best to provide for Eddie, and that meant they'd had one cell phone between the two, and Eddie had insisted that Wayne keep it.
By the time he got a laptop and internet, Steve had blocked him on Facebook and Twitter. That was the conclusion Eddie had come to when he finally worked up the nerve to swallow his pride and apologize and couldn't find Steve on either platform. Another thing that had filled Eddie with anger and hurt. Steve had broken up with him and then made sure Eddie couldn't reach back out.
Now he wonders, did Steve block him, or did Steve delete his socials to stop the hate mail?
Eddie feels nauseous.
Fuck!
What's worse is that, before the fight, Eddie had been so sure he was in love with Steve. But how can he say that with how quickly he dropped him? With how he's acted ever since? He could justify it to himself when he was still freshly broken up with and hurting but that faded away as fame took over.
Hard to be sad about not having a boyfriend when there were plenty of people lining up to be with him.
He pulls himself from his head to look at the laptop. A new tweet shows on Robin's screen and he scrambled to turn off the auto-refresher.
It's a short tweet, and Eddie sees she's changed her name as well.
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Clicking the link takes him to a YouTube video.
It starts with the camera slightly jiggling, presumably from someone hitting record. It's been set up in a recording studio. A stool in front of a mic that's suspended from the ceiling is the only thing in the frame.
"Alright, dingus, last chance to change your mind about this," Robin's voice is picked up from off screen.
"You can't talk me out of this," says a male voice, and without any thought about it, Eddie's hand flings out and slaps the space bar, pausing the video. His heart is pounding, and he has to take a few deep breaths. That was Steve's voice. Of course, it was Steve's voice, it's his statement video, but hearing it again. Hearing it spoken softly but determined.
Swallowing feels difficult. Eddie's last memory of Steve's voice was screaming. This is... this is the Steve he never thought he'd hear again, and hasn't realized how much he desperately wanted to. With shaking hands, he presses play again.
Steve steps into frame, takes a seat on the stool. He looks in the direction of the camera, and Eddie has to pause again, to take him in. His hair is longer than it was in high school, the ends of it touching his shoulders. He's got it pulled up in a half updo, keeping the hair out of his face. His face is familiar and yet so different. He certainly looks older but not in a bad way. The biggest difference is his nose; it's not as straight as it once was, like it's been broken and healed wrong. His strong, square face is as handsome as it ever was, perhaps more so now. Eddie's eyes are drawn to the two moles on his cheek; his eyes have always been drawn there. It was his favorite place to kiss Steve.
He's wearing light wash jeans and a deep blue Henley. And fuck if it doesn't make him look good.
Eddie unpauses again, and waits to hear the retribution he deserves.
"This good, Robin?"
"Yeah, you're perfectly in frame."
"Good. Uhh, hi. I'm Steve. Robin told me that there was a lot of fuss regarding a certain Corroded Coffin song, and that people wanted to hear from me. Which is wild 'cause like, I'm just some guy and I don't really have much to say-" Steve is saying, with a shrug of his shoulders.
"Steve!" Robin interrupts him, "I just had to help you move because someone threw a brick through your window! What do-"
"Okay! I get it! But that's not Corroded Coffin's fault. They do that whole anti-bullying thing! It's not like they don't address harassment and bullying. I-" Steve cuts off, seeming to remember he's on camera. His face turns pink. "We can argue this later. Uhh, anyway. There is something I want to say to Eddie Munson, so I hope he's watching."
He makes a 'give it to me' gesture and Robin enters frame, handing him an acoustic guitar. "I thought I'd answer using the one thing Eddie understands best. Music. So, uh, I wrote this song with Robin's help. Lyrics are mine but the melody is Robin. The song doesn't have a title but, uh, okay. Here it goes."
And then, Steve starts to sing, looking down at the guitar for correct finger placement more than singing into the mic but it picks him up well regardless.
"Do you think I'd give up? That this might've shook the love from me? Or that I was on the brink? How could you think, darling, I'd scare so easily? Now that it's done There's not one thing that I would change My life was a storm, since I was born. How could I fear any hurricane? If someone asked me at the end I'll tell them put me back in it-" Eddie is sitting down, and still he feels the floor fall out from under him.
"-Darling, I would do it again, ah, ah If I could hold you for a minute Darling, I'd go through it again, ah, ah."
Eddie doesn't hear the rest of the song because of the blood pounding in his ears. This can't be- it doesn't mean- after all this time? After everything that's happened, everything Eddie let happen, unintentionally or not.
His phone buzzes against his leg. He ignores it in favor of restarting the video and listening to the video from the start. He listens to the whole song and it ends without anything else. Once Steve's strummed the last chord, he just stands up, walks to the camera and the video ends.
He restarts the video again, and again, and again. Hears Steve sing How could you think I'd scare so easily and I would do it again if I could hold you for a minute and though I know my heart would break I'd tell them put me back in it.
It's through the tenth, or eleventh, playback that his phone buzzes again and he fumbles to answer blindly, unable to pull his eyes away from Steve on the screen of his laptop.
"Gare- It's not- what did I do Gare? Everything I thought Steve would have to say never came close to what he just sang. I can't- I don't know what to do," Eddie sobs into the phone.
There's a pause of silence before what is very much not Gareth's voice says, "Well, dammit Munson. I was calling to rip you a new one but you're already crying."
It takes Eddie a moment to place the voice, "Robin?"
"Unfortunately, yes," Robin says. "I think Steve's let you off easily, but I also know I kick a hornet's nest with my interview so I think we should work on getting this cleared up, both publicly and privately."
"How did you get my num-"
"Gareth. Keep up, Munson. I'd like us to be able to call off each other's fans. Your PR team and whoever you employee to do that anti-bullying campaign have done a pretty good job so far in telling people to back off, politely. Helps that Jeff has been on top of this from the beginning. Honestly, I think the best decision you've ever made in your life was making Jeff the front man of your band and not yourself. He's much more pleasant to talk to, and so good with people."
"Robin!" Eddie has to shout because Robin keeps saying words and they don't make sense. "What?"
He hears a sign from the other end of the phone. "You are annoying. You know that, Munson? I'll work with Gareth to get this done. I think we should be seen together, publicly. Maybe getting a coffee. So everyone knows we've made up, or whatever it is Gareth and I decide is happening. We should also meet up privately. There's a lot to talk about."
"I'm so confused."
"Nothing new. Now, when are you free to get on a plane to Pendleton, Oregon?"
"Pendleton?"
"Munson!" Robin snaps, "we just established that you live in a perpetual state of confusion. Instead of questioning me, how about you answer my questions. Now, when are you free?"
"Anytime."
"Smart answer. Get your ass to Pendleton by the morning of the twenty-third. I'll work with Gareth for all the other concerns. He's easier to deal with."
"Can I ask one follow up question at least!?"
"You just did but I'll allow one more before I hang up."
"Why Pendleton?"
"It's the nearest airport to our destination. I am not having a private conversation with you in California. I don't want to be caught speaking to you until Gareth and I have a chance to work out the details."
And then Robin hangs up.
Eddie leans forward and restarts the video on his laptop before looking up plane tickets. Fixing things with Robin might be the first step in ever getting try and, he doesn't know, apologize to Steve? Maybe even have a conversation one day.
He doesn't deserve that chance, he thinks, but he's a bad enough person to want it anyway.
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luck-of-the-drawings · 6 months
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OH ARTHUR BENNETT.. such a gorgeous and intriguing character. terribly burdened by a GRUESOME set of crimes, his light suffocated by a HEAVY century of GUILT. so tragic, so dark and broody, and yet PAINFULLY awkward in any social setting ever
#jrwi fanart#cw blood#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#arthur bennett#OUHH THIS ONE WAS SITTING IN MY WIPS FOR SO LOOOONGwhen i took it out there was mould on it :sob:#BUT i think i was able to fix it up okay#i keep seeing SO MANY MISTAKES RRAAAHHH BUT YOU DONT SEE THEM RIGHT?? THATS ONLY ME. RIGHT?? EXACTLY.#THE KEY IS TO SAY. AND REPEAT AFTER ME. 'FUUUCK IT WE BALL#so anyway. arthur bennett huh? grizzly says that arthur is reaal fuckin difficult to play. and i SUPER get that. i mean LOOK AT HIM..#grizz often needs a minute to think abt what hes gonna say in a way that matches w that Stoic Personality. which is FAIR but also that#ends up making way for awkward confrontations like: the lady in the parky lot. he took too long to answer and scared her away.& I LOVE THAT#arthur is tragic and sad and cool and stoic but hes ALSO awkward and silly and kinda dumb and short sighted. HE HAS COMPLEXITIES#I LOVE WHEN TTRPG CHARACTERS HAVE A GOOD SET OF SHORTCOMINGS. ESPECIALLY WHEN U FIND THEM ONLY AS U PLAY THEM.#I COULd go on and on saying the same things w different words abt arthurs intriguing and entertaining character but i shall spare u. for no#ILL ALSO MENTION HOW MUCH I LOVE HIS FLAVOR THO.. I LOVE TALL HOT BOY WHOS ONE W THE DARKNESS.. I REMEMBER WHEN HE FIRST MENTIONED THE#BADLUCK. N I WAS LIKE OOOHH THATS WHY HIS DESIGN IS SO COOL N CHAOTIC N ASYMMETRICAL. HES UNLUCKY!!! i love love love his design so much...#GRaaauruguguraguhhghghgh what else what else is there for me to spew on abt...i think im reachin a limit here..OH MAGNUS. i hope that#we get to know more abt how magnus and arthur met.. like How they became besties... ouuhh... I ALSO WANNA KNOW MORE ABT MARY DAVIS. LIKEHOW#he also apparently spent alotta time in a zone dominated by edward twilight? all he remembers is constant partying? I WANNA KNOW MORE..#i think i got room 4 one more ramble SO. THE ART PIECE.as i said its gone a lil stale BUT. im still very proud o the bits where hes allScar#I WANNA SEE HIM GET SCARYMORE. I like the idea of shadows solidifying to make him strange and eerie.like TEETH n CLAWS n SPINES n YESS#also the SILVER EYES.no1 does silver eyes like the show Claymore. they make em look so striking and eerie...i also like to think that#human arthur had deep beautiful brown eyes.just in my beaitufl heart.i mean look at him..i wanna cook him n eat him.ANYWAY#i think thats all my ramblin for this piece. now i gotta go cancel a single day i had ata hotel bc my work schedule change last minute FUCK#feel free to ramble in my tags aswell tho i read all of them and i chew on thenm and i love them so sos os mcuh
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rtby · 3 months
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played stardoll too much in my youth now i need an oc dress up sim
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icejinlov3r · 9 days
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*Frieza, Frost, Zamasu and Cell watch the latest Sparking Zero trailer*
*Frost not yet revealed as a playable character*
Frost: *sniffles* Why haven’t they chosen me yet…? 🥺🥺
Frieza: Darling, there’s no need to worry. I’m sure you’ll be announced soon.
Zamasu: Yes, indeed. After all, several of your other Universe 6 Allie’s had been picked.
Cell: I dunno….there’s not a lot of slots left.
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Cell: The next trailer might even be the last character reveal.
Frost: 🥺🥺🥺
Frieza: *glares at Cell* You’re not helping.
Cell: Just saying. Don’t get your hopes up.
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bunnihearted · 1 month
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.
#ppl judge me constantly but no one understands that#im a person who is at most a third wheel. im in the way#im never the first choice. never even the 2nd option lol.#i have NEVER dated or even been asked out on a date. no one has flirted with me#im 25 yrs old and a lover girl at heart but i have never even experienced a date#or a kiss. it's normal that some ppl havent had sex or a relationship but they had their 1st kiss in 4th grade 💀#ppl dont understand what that feels like it seems like.... most ppl i talk to or tells me things abt this#or that i should 'love myself or' whatever#have all dated or are dating or have had sex or been in a relationship or been flirted with#sorry but u cannot possibly understand what it's like to be 25 and not having experienced any of that#for me it's more like... i was completely ignored while a group of boys flirted with my friends#and at the only party i was at a guy joked to his friend that he should kiss me and an entire group of guys laughed at me 🧍🏻‍♀️#i was like... i havent even asked im just standing here bc my friend wanted to go 🙃🙃🙃🙃#or the boys in my class said i was repulsive and wanted to throw up looking at me... 😔🌧💔#and sorry but like someone having seen three pics of me where i've put effort into the angle and some light flattering editing ..#cant know what i look like irl... being ugly and grotesque and hideous is smth that has been such a big thing in my entire life#maybe it's also why when i had this crush it got so much bigger and more intense bc i talked to him withou any ANY ANY at all#thoughts that he could ever ever be even slightly or remotely interested in me. and then he was.... biggest shock of my life#how could someone i liked so much ..... show interest in... *me*?#but the fear of even the smallest chance that he'd be seeing me irl and ..#finding me repulsive and ugly and grotesquely hideous .. the fear of that got so big#bc if that'd happen.. i think i'd actually curl up into a ball and die#i would never recover from that. it's bad enough when that guy i didnt even like said yeah you're ugly haha after i sent him a pic 🧍🏻‍♀️
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betterthanbatman1 · 1 year
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My boy out here living his best life *wipes tear* I’m so happy for him
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I know for a fact that this boy would kill to attend a masquerade ball like this
Bonus:
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Proof that Jason has ways loved ballet and ‘the arts’ since before he was taken in by Bruce
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freshairforrabbits · 10 months
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[DIAL TONE] WE'RE SORRY; YOU HAVE REACHED A NUMBER THAT HAS BEEN DISCONNECTED OR IS NO LONGER IN SERVICE. IF YOU FEEL YOU HAVE REACHED THIS RECORDING IN ERROR, PLEASE CHECK THE NUMBER AND CALL AGAIN.
WE'RE SORRY; YOU HAVE REACHED A NUMBER THAT IS--
"Please, please, please, oh, fuck, god— I can't. I can't. I—"
We're sorry; you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you feel you have reached this recording in error, please check the number and try your call again.
"No. No, that's—"
The number you have reached, 8006564673, has been disconnected. No further information is available about 8006564673. We're sorry; you have reached a number that has been—
"That's not… fuck—" gagging, mucus slicking down his throat. Their throat. Someone's. Anyone's. Jesus Fucking—
"Jake?... Jake, hey. Hey, man, it's... Are you— are you trying to call someone?"
pretty boy snuff film chapter 16: returns;
12/?/24-1/?/24
"What happens to a house when it is left alone?... It becomes worn and aged, and it's paint peels. And it's foundations begin to sink... when it goes for too long unlived in."
Audio from anatomy by Kitty Horrorshow.
"No one is just one person, you, for example, are both Cain and Abel." Quote in the first image from Cain by José Saramago.
First Image has the Cain quote in black lettering above it. VHS noise corrupts the picture of cell clusters against a yellow-orange background. At the top is the floor plan to a narrow apartment. In the middle is a flipped and corrupted image of younger Jake Sully with the words You Are Here stamped under his head. The word rape repeats over and over in the remaining space below. Pretty boy snuff film stamps across the image as the video plays.
Second image is a public road sign for a church. There is the outline of a child's body inside of the negative space. A no signal message repeats over and over in the right corner.
Third image is the cross section of an underground system dug out by an animal. Two of the burrows say house, while one says no, no, no, no.
Fourth image is an advertisement for ammunition with a safe place sign overlaying it. The safe place sign is a bigger figure with their arms wrapped around a smaller one. Blood splatters the image and text.
Fifth image is a public domain advertisement drawing of a rabbit being chased by a hunting dog for Western Ammunition in 1908 by Lynn Hunt.
Sixth image is the military power and control wheel, signs of sexual and physical violence by a military spouse with text purposefully whited out in each spoke of the wheel.
Seventh image is the loss of bark, sapwood and heartwood of a tree over decades and after exposure to fire damage.
Images are all public domain with zero restrictions on use from Wikimedia Commons. Video editing and photo manipulation by freshairforrabbits.
Link to the fic itself, mind the tags.
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mybrainproblems · 1 year
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i need you to understand that i am never going to be as compelled by a canon queer ship that is just there and has had no time to develop vs an unintentional one that developed over the many years of a show's run and was never intended
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monty-glasses-roxy · 22 days
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For some reason, this round of meds (same dose and everything as last time) is making me have very violent Realisations and Remembering Things moments. And by that I mean the Thing I Forgot and/or the Realisations show up with a bat and see how hard they can make my brain hit the wall. So anyway.
YOU GUYS REMEMBER SPIKE THE WETFLOOR BOT??? YOU GUYS REMEMBER HER??? THE FIRST FAZBEAR ANIMATRONIC TO BE BORN FROM LOVE INSTEAD OF PAIN??? YOU REMEMBER HER???
CAUSE I JUST DID
#SPPIIIIKKKEEEEEE I MISS YOOOUUUU#I love spike. spike the wet floor bot is my favourite. I miss her I should bring her back somehow#the first animatronic to gain sentience and awareness out of LOVE and CARE#I miss her we need to bring her back. I never made a visual design but I definitely posted some descriptions of her pretty sure#a wet floor bot... a little wonky and a little off colour. holes in it's damaged and dented casing patched up with scrap#never the same colour. always different#stickers and magnets and a lil bit of spray paint. part of an ear missing and crooked#has one of roxy's spiked bracelets around her neck with a keyring dangling from it like a tag...#she picked her own name and pronouns... doesn't really understand what they are and what they mean but she wants them#in one AU she was Roxy's little distraction. something to work on and repair while the others search the rubble of the plex for-#their friends. In another Roxy repaired her for fun unknowingly after Vanny had used her as a test subject for the virus#in another one post-ruin roxy and cassie were searching the plex for an easy animatronic for roxy to repair so cassie's dad could-#test what she'd learned about repairing them from him and found a salvageable wet floor bot#that they then wrapped in tarp and put in a shopping trolley to take her straight home and get to work on her much to the-#confusion of literally everyone as they barrel down the halls of flats with an unidentified tarp blob in a stolen shopping trolley#<- that one's Meteors AU btw. Roxy got turned into a Real Boy by the Meteor and is now living with Cassie as her adopted sister#this is just the kind of shit these two get up to all the time and no one knows who's meant to be the braincell between them because well#they keep taking turns on who the older sibling is. they keep changing it. the eldest sibling is based entirely on the situation lmao#who's bright idea was it to steal a wet floor bot? WHO KNOWS!! Cassie said 'pick an animatronic!' so they did that's all there is to it!#cassie's dad just. head in hands. as he realises. the fucking wet floor sign on wheels is sentient now.#why. why and how. terrified of the wrath of Fazbear if they find out. while she's just. trundling about.#wheels on carpet floor style. struggling but getting there. happy beeps as she pushes a ball around on the floor. living her best life.#sfdsfdsfs I fucking LOVE Spike okay I miss her I need to bring her back somehow#I could give her to mangle or sprocket in robot hell but I'm not doing much with that right now#sdhfdfsfs Chica's recipe zine starring Spike!! and every image of her is just confusion#'see? even Spike likes bananas!' Chica says as she puts one on the floor so Spike can very happily run it over.#dfsdfsds love Spike. Spike enrichment is now running random foods over because she can. and also the wheels off a toy monster truck#so she can be an ALL TERRAIN wet floor bot. make them gecko wheels like DJ's hands and she's got everyone beat lmao#she can be DJ's Uppies Buddy!!#lmao Spike I'm so sorry I've left you in the dark for so long I'm bringing you back. beloved guy of all time
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cheapcheapfaker · 10 months
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heheheheh :3 (that’s his tongue out and then chewing on his hand)
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living-in-a-fantasia · 2 months
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Hugh
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Auuighjjhhhh
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gay-ppl-real · 4 months
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I see yet another piece of Welcome Home art where Eddie is depicted dropping parcels or losing mail or what have you to demonstrate that he's a bit clumsy and all over the place and another part of me becomes dipped in frustration about people not understanding the source material
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no27-autonation-honda · 8 months
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you know there's a real missed opportunity of not making versions of like the real housewives franchise in comics. you look me in the eyes and you goddamned tell me that the real housewives of gotham or central city doesn't fucking SMACK in the dc universe and give atlanta and rhony a run for the crown
#kazoo noises#superhero posting#dc#can YOU IMAGINE how good real housewives of gotham would be? my GOD#better tv than early rhonj! i am so serious that shit would be REVOLUTIONARY!!!! oh the reality tv scholars in superhero universes are#SICK. like. play with me in this space guys. please. gotham is famously corrupt and chockablock of villains and the only good wealthy perso#is basically wayne and affiliates. who despite waynes freewheeling pretty boy idle rich energy is not reality tv trashy (SOMEHOW)#why isnt he on the show? isnt he with a new gal every month? ''guess he never gets passed to the housewife crowd''#one of the season plotlines involves a messy divorce a disgraced mayor and like idk *spins wheel* city comptroller of gotham that happened#during a local election year and the city gathers together for the inside scoop in between this poor fuckin rich lady who while kinda..#sketch (real housewives vibes truly) is still sympathetic and raked over the coals by national media and HEY THATS ONE OF OUR FREAKS! who#has a home renovation. a divorce. her kids! and is really trying the poor gal. crazy season. theres still another plotline#and you KNOW central city breeds folks weird. like gotham has the sketchiness and the weirdness. central city is kitsch#central citys housewives are all balls to the wall wild. theres the workin ladies and the vaguely old money ladies and They Dislike Each#Other but u know they'll circle them wagons when an out of towner gets involved (this is me projecting bc i view central city as superhero#stl) do you think someone ever gets wrapped up in a supervillain plot? just this housewife and the camera guy for bravo out shopping and OH#FUCK! ITS CAPTAIN COLD! and now we got a hostage situation#and you knooooow that whichever speedster comes to save the day is making small talk during the rescue. you just know it.#bet that episode of housewives won an emmy tbh. theres like five different phd dissertations on it. in an oral history of the franchise#someone does fucking bag an interview with the flash about the Captain Cold Episode. its the most peaceful fucking reunion andy ever hosts#dont ask about my opinions about drag scenes in comics im worse about that
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