#THEY HAD CLOSED TWO OTHER LOCAL HOSPITALS IN THE PREVIOUS TWO YEARS!

[puntointerrogativo]

That support local news post reminded me of that one time when a woman I regularly worked with for local festivals coverage ended up in the E.R. with a period so heavy it was in fact not a period but a pretty serious hemorrhage and was made to wait long enough that she was sitting in a pool of her own blood until she called me and started loudly describing her situation and asking when the article would come out.

Guess when they magically realized she was in need of immediate attention? 💀

[cupidkenji]

killshot, baby

Pairing: Aaron Hotch x Doctor!Fem!reader Cw: Fluff (for real this time), LONGING (this is literally 9k words of pure yearning idek how I did that), mentions of blood, Hotch gets shot, Jack being adorable, Jack gets injured too :(, no explicit age gap, this is just rlly cute idk it's sweet I love Hotch so much I need him Summary: When you get hired as the BAU's stand-by medic, the team leader ends up being the hardest part of your job. Disclaimer: Reader is chubby! She's always fat coded, but like usual she's not described here. Just know a chubby person was imagined when writing this <3 WC: 9k (Hotch is the love of my life I could go on about him forever) This is definitely not medically accurate, please just enjoy for the sake of the story. I LOVE HOTCH I WANNA SMOOCH HIM

As weird as it was, band aids were the thing you remembered most from your childhood. You grew up as a canvas for any sort of scrape, cut, or bruise. Any wound that made your parents feel mildly worried to utterly terrified were ones that decorated your body frequently. You never tried to assign any meaning to why you became a doctor, simply crediting it as your call to the profession - to people. If you had to, though, your consistently bruised adolescent body is the best root cause you could think of. It seemed only right that the kid who couldn’t keep her skin in tact would grow to love helping others. You liked to think that’s how you kept your head an average size. Your bosses and co-workers had raved about your abilities no matter the job you took, and after a while you had to start prioritizing keeping your humility. You had started as just a kid with bruises. 

You tended to ground yourself with those same memories in times like this. For as long as you’d worked in the hospital, you held some disdain for agents. You saw many federal ones, being so close to the HQ for divisions like Behavioral Analysis, but some locals swung by too. You’d had far too many experiences of them being snappy, demanding, and usually inconsiderate to the team of people trying to save someone. You understood the individuals you were committed to helping often got there by doing monstrous things, but demanding to talk to someone when they were bleeding out and half-conscious always forced your tongue between your teeth in an effort to stay respectful. Especially now, pushing a stretcher with 3 other workers while trying to shake off the feds trailing after him. You recognized them, Agents Rossi and Hotchner, if you remembered correctly. 

“We’ll need to talk to him immediately.” The man - Rossi, you assumed, seeing as he was going gray and had less of a charge fueling his steps - spoke quickly as the two men followed your team.

“Be here when he’s out of surgery.” You didn’t bother to look back, trying to convey your annoyance and praying they got the hint. 

“He’s killed three women and has another one hostage. We don’t have time.” The other one piped up, easily keeping pace with you.

Abandoning your previous strategy, you let your team push the man into the operating room, shutting the door behind them and whipping around to face the duo. “I understand that, sir, believe me.” You were more elevated than you would have liked, years of unease unfortunately slipping through your efforts to withhold them. “But whatever happened when you found him left him barely breathing. You can’t speak to a corpse. You’ll have your time when he’s stable. Go do your job and let me do mine.” You tensed your calves planning to turn around, but quickly felt the guilt catch up to you. “I’ll call you if he wakes up.”

“If?” 

You sighed. You hated profilers. “I’ll call you.” 

“Call the headquarters.” He was scribbling down a number on the back of a hospital business card. “Ask for Agent Hotch. We’ll be waiting.” You nodded your head once, taking the card from his hands. He started walking away as he thanked you. “We appreciate it.” Sure.

–

The surgery to save the man had been a trip and half. One of the bullets had internally ricocheted, and the other two were lodged next to crucial arteries. You praised your mother for giving you steady hands as you inched them out of him. It took you and your team six hours and fifteen minutes to get his heartbeat steady, you estimated he’d be knocked out all night. You should call, you thought. You had no idea how late these people worked but they were more than likely expecting to talk tonight and you didn’t know if that’d be possible. You fished the card out of your pocket, his handwriting was impressively neat for how fast he’d written the number. You heard the line ring twice before someone picked up. 

“This is Penelope Garcia with the Behavioral Analysis Unit, who am I speaking to?”

“Uh- I’m Dr. L/n down at Quantico Med. I’m looking for Agent Hotch?” Your words tilted up at the end of your sentence. The casual nature of his shortened name left a weird feeling in your mouth after you said it. “I have an update on a patient he was asking after.”

“Is this about an unsub?” 

“A what?” She lacked professionalism. You wondered briefly if he had just given you the phone number of an employee.

“I’m sorry-” she laughed slightly. “Is this about a suspect? Hotch told me someone might be calling.”

“Um - yeah it’s about a suspect. He was brought in earlier. Is Agent Hotch there? I’m sorry ma’am but I've been in an operating room for the past 6 hours and I want to go home.” You hoped she’d respect your honesty, you really didn’t have the patience to explain yourself to someone new. 

She chuckled. “I got you honey, I’ll page you over.” The line went dead for a second before the ringing resumed. Please be quick, you prayed, get me out of this fucking hospital.

“Hotchner.” His voice was rougher over the phone. You guessed the long hours started to weigh on him by this time of night. You always felt it the most around this time, too.

“Hi, sir. This is Dr. L/n from the hospital. We managed to stabilize your guy, but it’s unlikely he’ll be up before tomorrow. I know it was assumed he’d be awake tonight but it took longer to operate than expected.” Your guys put 3 bullets in him, so sorry for the inconvenience. “I’ll be here all day tomorrow. You can come by at any time and I’ll let you in.”

“Are you positive we can’t talk to him tonight? I understand the situation is difficult but this case is extremely time sensitive. I’m sure that’s not lost on you.” You cursed the man for not being more condescending in his delivery. Thinking of the poor person either trapped or dead right now due to the guy you just saved made you sick. 

“I know.” Fucking hell. “I can wake him up.” A quarter dose of adrenaline works wonders. “Be here in fifteen minutes. You won’t have much time to talk to him.”

“Thank you.” He hung up. You put your head in your hands. Just a little kid with bruises.

– 

The layout of the BAU made you envious of the workers here. You’re sure they’d dealt with atrocities beyond what the average person could stomach, but you also worked within the belly of the beast and man were those hospital hallways claustrophobic. The daylight shone beautifully through the large windows, and you asked yourself if you’d be able to cope with all the paperwork in exchange for a feel like this. There weren’t any front desks, nowhere to sign in, so you sat in one of the chairs by the door and waited to see if something would happen. You had been specifically requested to visit the building , a note signed ‘Strauss’ being left with the hospital secretary. You didn’t like being called on by a stranger, it made you nervous beyond belief. You’re sure anyone walking by assumed you were being charged with something. Sweating like a sinner in church.

“Dr. L/n?” A woman was standing near you, having completely avoided your eyesight until now. “I’m the board supervisor, Erin Strauss. Thank you for coming.” The woman was nice enough, but she seemed rigid, clearly confident in her authority. She led you to her office and gestured to the chair facing her desk.

“I’ll cut right to the chase.” She smoothed her pencil skirt as she sat down. “The BAU is seeking a stand-by medic and I’d like to offer you the position. You’re revered highly by your previous places of employment and your current boss has only good things to say. Along with a personal reference by an employee of mine, you’re certainly a person of interest. You’d be working interchangeably with three other individuals, however you would be the first one called when needed.”

That is definitely not what you were expecting. You were almost immediately ready to turn down the offer. You didn’t work well with cops. You worked well in a hospital, going into the field to patch the wounds of both good and evil was a less than appealing deal to you. 

“You’d be on call while you worked your current position at Quantico Medical, when you’re at home you can remain there, but you’ll be flying with the rest of the team when they leave. You will be entered into a federal database, and employed as a stand-in for hospitals near you when working abroad.” She went on to explain you’d be paid salary, and when you heard just how much you could add to your monthly income by doing this, you took it. You were doing fine, you definitely didn’t need the financial boost, but you had family that could use it. Your niece had been close to turning down college because of the cost, so some extra money could really set her up. 

“Excellent. You’ll start your field training next Monday.” She was shuffling papers into a hefty stack as she talked. “Come back when you’ve finished this and I’ll arrange a team meeting.” The stack was even heavier than you expected when you picked it up. It was far too early to be regretting your decision. 

–

The first day of training had been easy enough. You weren’t an agent, so you avoided having to learn weapons or combat. It generally consisted of learning efficiency, along with how to work properly with agents and the expected etiquette when dealing with an unsub. You had met the team only once by now. Everyone had been nice - Garcia especially - but aside from her nobody had been particularly welcoming. The conditions of your job were a bit strange, basically capitalizing on the what ifs that came with the FBI title, and that created a bit of distance between you and the rest of the team. They questioned the necessity of you, they’d survived this long without a stand-by medic with them, why did they need one now?

Above any disregard for those in law enforcement sat your stubbornness. You knew they were on the fence about you, the most logical thing for you to do now would be attend every session required of you and prove yourself through pure accomplishment. Easy in theory, much harder to execute when Aaron Hotch is the one you’re learning from. He was a good teacher - you’d give him that - he had a confidence to him that easily dominated a room, attracted eyes in a way other men couldn’t manage. You’d ignored the initial stir in your stomach when meeting him in favor of attempting to scold him and his partner. Now, it was much harder to quell the slight pound in your head or the sweat on your palms. He was just standing up front, lecturing on the importance of a team, but his attire was the only thing able to break through the haze in your mind. Every time he’d shown up at the hospital, he’d donned a suit, a slightly baggy blazer worked incredibly well as a shield to your curiosity. That had clearly changed, as he shed the overcoat when talking to the class, having just a white button up adorn his torso. You took notice of the rolled up sleeves, clearing your throat quietly to snap yourself back into focus. You had the intention of snuffing out this little thing of yours but were a living contradiction at this point, setting on the goal of avoidance while barely ignoring the sight of the veins on his arms. You pondered the thought of sleeping with some man at a bar just to get this out of your system, but remembered how little projecting attraction onto someone else helps a situation. In other words, you were probably fucked.

– 

The first mission you worked with the team had you flying to a tiny Georgia town to investigate a string of bodies being found in ransacked homes. It seemed to be a simple motive, robbery turned to murder, but the team was called down to help once the kill count hit five. You had been expecting a long commercial flight, figuring you’d need to invest in a good neck pillow and some aspirin. Nobody had bothered to inform you the Bureau utilized private air travel, or that you’d be flying in one with people you’d known for two weeks. You’re sure you looked a little out of place, looking around the plane without being obvious you were doing it and adjusting to the sight of couches on planes. The others, having had this privilege for years now, took their respective seats. You had been nervous about that, unfortunately. The unsure feeling of where to sit reminding you painfully of high school cafeterias and inferior reputations. The only open seat happened to be right next to the man you’d been ducking away from the past two weeks. Lovely. He took a moment to look at you when you sat. You were prepared to talk to him, but for now you busied yourself with rummaging through your bag looking for nothing and pretending not to see him in your peripherals.

“Do you get sick on planes?” He seemed to have a deeper motive when he asked, like you saying yes would solve a puzzle in his head.

“Not really.” You’d only been on a plane a handful of times. “Turbulence can make me nervous, but I think that’s fairly normal.” You thought momentarily that perhaps he would blame your obvious anxiety on that instead of his proximity to you. He was a profiler, you’re sure he picked up on tells for nerves you weren’t even aware you had, but maybe he’d write it off. “Why do you ask?”

“You seem…” He trailed off for a moment, looking over your face to try and categorize your expression. “I don’t know, lost?” He smiled, light and easy, and you realized he was trying to reach out to you. The comfortability in the gesture made your head spin. It was like a shot of morphine, enveloping your body in a dull elation - an escape. You wanted that comfortability, wanted him to feel weightless around you. There had been a certain tension between the two of you since you started. He was warmer than the rest, but also more awkward. Your first real interaction had been an outburst, and it left you hesitant to talk to him. 

You chuckled at his remark. “No I -” You shook your head as you spoke, as if shaking off his accusation. “Nobody told me about the jet. You’d think exclusive aircraft would be in the job predecessor.”

He nodded in agreement, holding a slight upturn on his lips. “Yes, you would.” He glances away to check the time, looking back to you quickly like you were his homebase. “Strauss has a habit of getting ahead of herself. Plus, we’re all pretty used to it by now. I have to remind her sometimes that normal provisions don’t have a TI.”

“I’m sure.” It was clear she’d worked with the unit for a while. “Even if they did, though, they’d never find another Garcia.” You thought of the woman, bright and sparkly and incredibly good at her job. “You guys are lucky to have her.”

He stared at you, losing a hint of the lightheartedness and letting a wave of genuinity intertwine with it. “You have her too, Y/n.” His eyes were like a trap, rich pools of honey just begging to tug you down in. “You’re a member of this team. Don’t think your newness makes you inferior to anyone else on it. We’re lucky to have you too.”

Fuck, you were whipped. “I really appreciate that, sir.”

He smiled, shaking his head and waving you off. “Don’t with the sir, please. It’s bad enough when Garcia does it. You can call me Aaron.” Not even the other team members called him that, a thought that seemed to strike you both simultaneously. “Or Hotch, whatever you prefer.”

You just looked at him, letting a smile rouse your lips and trying your hardest not to let the effect he had on you reach your face. “Ok.”

–

The first case had been good training wheels, simply tending to a vic who needed stitches and getting a feel for the life of a field agent. You’d been adjusting nicely to it, quickly getting used to working random hospitals and waiting to be needed on an active crime scene. The others had warmed up to you tremendously after getting back, opening their circle for one more, and you couldn’t be more grateful. A team like this was something you’d wanted for a while, growing more and more unsatisfied with the callous ER workspace by the day. Ironically, there was much more life in jobs dealing with murder. He had also been warming up to you. The two of you hit the status of work-place friends nearly instantly. The endearing encounter on the plane simmered inside you for a while. The memory of it prompting you to keep talking to him, always searching for a fix of the painkiller you’d felt that day. 

You weren’t a profiler, but you were unfathomably infatuated, leading you to never miss his tone getting softer with you, or any one of his touches that lingered for just a second too long. It just barely bypassed the line of friendship, but you never lost sight of that linear barrier, so it was incredibly prevalent to you when he breached it. You scoffed at the idea of any reciprocity, brushing off every remark made by a coworker or the one horrific time you heard JJ refer to the two of you as ‘mom and dad.’ This wasn’t a plausible thing. This was a stupid workplace crush that was more of a hindrance than anything. The growing closeness between you and him would have it’s effects properly restrained to the confines of your head, only permitted to express themselves once you were away from the man. It was an odd dynamic, but Aaron wasn’t an obvious guy, so trying to define the edges of you two would only draw attention to the fact you had been looking at all. No thank you.

“Shit.” The team was sitting around the table going over their files. You were mainly there for support, as you were never a part of the lead up to the catch, the chase. You heard Hotch mumble the exclamation under his breath and looked over to see the trouble. He was looking down at his phone, jaw resting between his thumb and pointer finger. You got up and moved to sit next to him, the motion virtually ignored by everyone else as they continued searching for connections.

“Everything ok?” You mumbled to him, trying not to disturb your friends who were nearly nose-deep in their files. 

“Yeah.” He sighed. “Jack’s sitter canceled. I wanted to stay here to go over the latest crime scene but I guess I’ll have to raincheck.” The killings of your latest unsub had been increasing. You knew the collective stress that was starting to boil within the team. Him going home would only slow them down, a horrible addition to a killer that was speeding up. 

You volunteered your night away before you even got a chance to think about it. 

“I can watch him.” 

Surprise was apparent in the raise of his eyebrows. “I appreciate it, but I couldn’t ask that of you.

You’re fairly certain you would do anything he asked of you, but the nobility of the man in this case almost made you roll your eyes. “No, please. I offered and I would love to. I’m not helping anyone just sitting here, and you leaving would slow them down. You know what to look for here, I don’t. I don’t want another girl going missing just cause your sitter flaked. I can do it.”

He seemed mildly speechless. “I -” He paused, trying to find the wording he wanted. “I suppose you’re right. I’ll send you the address, if you’re sure.” He looked at you with more adoration than you’d ever had directed at you, so intense your eyes instinctively ducked down. “Thank you, Y/n.” He was so touched by the action it made you slightly sad to think about. Had no one ever helped him? Maybe you were raised weird, this seemed hardly beyond common decency to you. 

“What are friends for?” He exhaled a slight laugh in gratuitous agreement, but you saw the glimmer of his eyes dull slightly. The notion surely reflected in your own eyes as the words burned your tongue. Friends.

–

Jack was a delight. A well mannered, clearly well raised kid. Parts of his dad shined so vibrantly in him that you’re sure you’d be able to pick him out of a crowd based on mannerisms alone. Hotch had called Jack’s daycare, verifying your identity and giving you the ok to go pick him up. He seemed quiet on the way home, but rushed to give you a tour of the house, and excitedly led you to his line up of toy trains once you’d entered the place. There was a shift between you and Hotch that happened when you gave the offer. A shift that was now only just settling in you. This was his house. His space, his stuff, his place of security. He’d invited you into it, gave you permission to enter it, to exist within it, and it was strangely intoxicating. He was intoxicating, and you realized quickly how much you ached for the permanence of it. You’d made Jack dinner, played for a bit, went out for ice cream per his pleading, and wished him a peaceful goodnight when his bedtime rolled around. He’d dubbed you his ‘best babysitter ever’ and you knew as soon as the words hit your ears that you’d be watching him again. You’re sure situations like today popped up frequently for Hotch, you could be a valuable asset to him when you had free time. He would be saving money too. No need to pay a sitter when you were being paid by the Bureau every second you were there. Aaron had gotten home a few minutes past one, utterly exhausted and uncharacteristically apologetic. He was sorry for being gone so long, making you stay so late, everything and anything the man could apologize for was pouring out of his mouth. He’d welcomed you to stay, but his hair was messy from messing with it all night, and he’d ditched the suit jacket for a gray long sleeve. You’d wanted to take the opportunity, wanted to bask in the safety of him for as long as he’d allow it, but those restrained thoughts were clawing the walls of your skull with a vigor unlike anything you’d felt before. It would be abhorrent to dream about the man while in the confines of his home. You couldn’t do that - you wouldn’t. You brushed off any apology he could conjure and let him escort you out the door. His hand was on your lower back, and his voice was low from the siphoning nature of the day. 

“Thank you, again.” He looked at you. “You’re a lifesaver.” You’d expected to hear some humor in his voice. The start of banter between friends, a casual appreciation for a job well done, but there wasn’t any. He sounded rough, slightly beat down, his eyes filled with a sincerity all aimed at you. A blend of pure adoration and a deeper level of dedication. Was this a commitment? What kind?

Heat bubbled in your stomach as you made eye contact. “Please.” You shook your head slightly. “Jack’s an angel. You’re clearly as good at this as you are profiling.” You nodded in the vague direction of Jack’s bedroom as you referenced the kid. “It was my pleasure. I’d love to do it again, if you’ll let me.” 

He sighed out a small laugh and broke your gaze for a moment, looking back to you as he spoke. “I’d like that.”

–

You’d seen Jack a multitude of times after that. Aaron was never particularly fond of asking you, claiming that he appreciated the gesture but it was mainly Jack’s begging that made him cave. That, and your persistence. You liked Jack a lot, and more selfishly, you liked being around Aaron’s stuff. It was a little creepy, yes, but you felt better acquainted with him after being around his things. An energetic type of understanding, the type that deepened a connection without words. He was needed late tonight, and as much as you hated denying an offer to see Jack, you had priorities at the hospital. The previous sitter wasn’t able to watch him, so she gave a personal recommendation, and Jack got stuck with a stranger. You thought about him while working, probing and patching people half-focused with the desire to be elsewhere. You’d felt mildly guilty about it, but it’s not like it altered your work, so you figured it was harmless. 

You wondered slightly if you manifested the event you were watching play out. You watched in pure disbelief as a sobbing Jack was being carried into the ER by a flustered blonde woman. There was blood staining the right sleeve of his shirt, pouring out of his skin in a surplus and completely soaking through the material. A jagged piece of glass was standing at attention in his wrist, having sliced through the fabric like butter. He was marked ‘urgent,’ who knows if the shard had hit an artery or where the glass had come from. 

Most other doctors were busy, either operating or tending to patients. You’d walked to the front desk, remaining as calm as your racing heart would let you, and told the secretary to assign the case to you. “I know this one. Let me take him.” She just nodded, marking your name down as the primary doctor and allowing you to take him back. 

Walking up to the blonde woman, you assumed this had been the new babysitter. She was a wreck, trying to explain what happened through her own hysteria while simultaneously having her words drowned out by the crying child. “It’s ok, ma’am.” You’d reassured her, obviously she hadn’t intended the injury. “Let me take him, I’m a friend of his father.” You saw the calmness dilate her eyes, making itself apparent in the relaxation of her tense shoulders. You removed the bleeding boy from her arms, holding him against you and cooing at him the way you would a baby. You took him to a stretcher a few feet away and laid him down, ensuring his wounded arm stayed flat in an attempt to slow the blood. He was on the brink of passing out, his body not having nearly enough energy for the sobbing on top of losing vital fluid. “Jack.” You addressed him directly, two more doctors aiding your transfer to an examination room. “I need you to stay with me, buddy. Just a little longer, I promise. You’re gonna be just fine.” You pushed with one hand, caressing his non-injured arm to emphasize your affection. “Just a little longer.” You looked at him in between looking forward to keep the stretcher straight, seeing that same adoration from his father’s eyes mirrored in his. You felt protective, realizing you cared for the Hotchners much more than you let yourself believe. Little kid with bruises, you skimmed through your origins in your mind in an attempt to center your focus. Just a little kid with bruises.

Two hours later, Jack was stitched up and sleeping soundly. You knew his sitter had called Hotch, probably as soon as something happened, and were not surprised to find him idle in a waiting room chair. He was leaned forward, head in his hands and knee bouncing violently. He heard footsteps getting closer, a feeling within him recognizing them as yours, and he looked up. His eyes were teary, tired. The look of a concerned father.

“How is he?” You’d never witnessed this type of worry in him, heard the amount of desperation in his voice.

You smiled lightly as a predecessor to Jack’s wellbeing. “He’s fine. Glass missed his arteries. We had him patched up in around an hour and a half. Gave him a lollipop and a light sedative to get him to rest. He should be all set to go in the morning.” 

He sighed, and the amount of stress that audibly left his body made you feel a little lighter from where you stood. “Thank God.”

“Hey man, give us a little credit.” You joked, relieved when you heard the slight laugh come from his downturned head. Pity laugh, probably, but it was a cherished sound nonetheless. 

“You have full credit, Y/n.” He shook his head, raising it to look at you. “Quite the hero.”

You almost physically recoiled from the term, rushing to correct him while maintaining the lighthearted nature. “Definitely not.” You rejected the praise. “Just doing my job. I’m glad I could help him.”

He leaned back in his chair, relaxing for a second before he planned to stand up. “Noble.” He chuckled. “But you helped my son. That’s about as heroic as it gets to me, doc.”

Blood rushed to your ears at your professional title being used so affectionately. “Go check on your kid, Hotch.” You waved back towards the direction of Jack, knowing that even though he was asleep, he’d want to see him anyway. You also hoped the slight distraction would draw his attention away from your increasingly flustered state. “You’ll have plenty of time to praise me.” You weren’t entirely sure you’d wanted the sentence to exit your mouth, but it was too late to bite your tongue.

He raised his eyebrows so slightly that you scolded yourself for having noticed. Such a minuscule action that seemed to move mountains within your brain. “Oh?”

“Shut up.” You rolled your eyes at your own remark. “I’m walking away. You know what I meant.”

“Mhm.” He smiled, nodding his head dramatically and rising from his seat. “Just name a time and place, doc. I’ll do good on that promise.”

You went momentarily braindead, hoping your eyes weren’t giving away the less than work appropriate feeling pumping through your veins. You stared baffled at him for what was definitely a millisecond too long before giving a half-shocked, half-flattered laugh and gesturing him away. “Say that when you’re not obviously sleep deprived and delirious and maybe we can arrange it.” The last thing you heard was him, laughing the way you do when you’re very serious but desperately trying to pass it off as a joke. You knew it well, having done it almost every time you were around him since you started. Comfortable, witty retorts between  friends. “Have a good night, Aaron.” 

Aaron, he thought. He’d remember that.

– 

That had been the second shift between the two of you. Felt immediately by both parties and tossing you both into the deep end of whatever you’d been building with him. He’d been much more touchy, seemingly subconscious on his part but noticed by every part of your body, mind, and soul. You thought about what it could mean, then sunk even further into your incoherent mind when realizing just how subconscious the actions really were. He was just drawn to you. You had viscerally fought that conclusion as it came to you but it genuinely could not be anything else. He was touching you more because - whether on the surface or deeper down - he just wanted to, and that fact was wrecking you. You were so fucking into him that it hurt. Hurt to look at him or be in his home watching Jack or have his knee pressed against yours in the back of car during a team outing. It all hurt because he wasn’t yours. He seemed into you, too. Of course, you didn’t know to what extent. You worried maybe he hadn’t said anything yet because he simply didn’t like you enough, and that hurt more than any other factor. It was a foolish notion - one you would have abandoned instantly had you peeked inside his head - but alas, no such luck.

He’d been more relaxed, too. The two of you reaching a point in your relationship you hadn’t ever let yourself dream about. He was funny, achieving that lightness around you that you’d wanted from the start. He’d gotten riskier, amping up the dial on his remarks a bit. Starting with those like the hospital, ending with ones that made you have to take a breather in the room where they kept the coffee. It hadn’t gone unnoticed, per say, but the others were certainly ignorant to the true depth of the change. You simply couldn’t measure it by witnessing, you had to feel it. And fuck were you feeling it. 

A week or so after Jack’s ER visit, you’d asked after him. You didn’t know if the regret was immediate, but it flooded through you quickly. Aaron got nervous, shifty, like you’d touched a live wire of his and he now had to patch it up before it blew. You got concerned, asking if something happened with his stitches or if Jack was now showing some sort of trauma response to the event. Was that even plausible? You weren’t sure, PTSD wasn’t exactly your strong suit. However, he quickly stated that wasn’t the case, noting that Jack was actually in perfect health and had been relentless about wanting you over for dinner.

“He’s grateful.” Hotch was smiling with paternal reluctance, proud of his son for having such good morals but also uncomfortable with the possibility of rejection he was facing. “He wants to see you, say thank you for “saving his life.” He emphasized the last bit in a sarcastic tone, both of you knowing his life hadn’t been in danger but also knowing that fact wouldn’t deter the boy from considering you some type of guardian angel. “Would you be up for it?” If you hadn’t been so focused on snuffing out the heat rushing to your face, you would have seen that same heat reflected in a slight pink across his cheeks. 

“Definitely.” You smiled at the thought of the boy bugging his dad about getting you to the house. “When were you thinking?”

“Saturday night?” Both of you were scheduled to be off that day, and you found yourself begging whatever merciful being would listen to not have some lead to chase that day. “He’ll want the day to prepare.” He chuckled.

“Oh no.” You joked. Prepare? You couldn’t even begin to imagine what that meant. “Well, I am extremely curious to find out what an eight year old boy has to prepare for. How about seven? Would that be good?”

Aaron felt his palms start to sweat. He’d never actually been around his house when you’d been there, only seeing you on your way out. “That’s perfect.”

“Great.” You smiled, checking the time and realizing you needed to get going to the hospital. “I’m looking forward to it.” You nodded slightly as one last confirmation and headed out, suppressing a giddy smile while trying to force yourself into a headspace you could work in. 

In the meantime, Aaron watched you walk off from where he’d been perched on your desk, entirely oblivious to the man watching the scene.

“As I live and breathe.” Rossi had crept up on him, not spooking him but rather suspending him in a state of immeasurable embarrassment. “Aaron Hotcher has a crush.” The man held his shoulder, patting him there like a father witnessing his son get his first girlfriend. “She’s a good one. Quite the eye you got, Aaron.” Then he was gone, walking away with Aaron’s dignity clasped in his hands. Closing his eyes in pure mortification, Hotch simply thanked God that nobody else was around for that and walked away with the intention of fusing to his office chair to avoid ever looking at Rossi again. At least you’d said yes, he thought. He didn’t know how he’d cope with his friend watching him swing and miss.

–

The daylight seemed to be anticipating this more than you were, hours passing by like minutes until eventually the sun woke you up on Saturday morning. It was blazing through the cracks in your blinds, settling in slim lines across your floor, as light and gentle as snow. You’d been rehearsing your poker face in preparation for tonight. Writing safety manuals for any ungodly situation that could happen, everything from a fire to Aaron gaining the ability to read your mind and unearthing what you really thought about him. You were so happy that Jack held you in such high esteem, but your hands were shaking at the thought of sitting down with him and his father and acting like it wasn’t the dynamic you fucking dreamt about. You knew it was a good sign of compatibility if someone’s cat liked you - did their child liking you mean the same thing? You hoped Jack’s seemingly innate approval of you gave you at least a couple brownie points. Aaron had called you a hero. Swiftly ignoring the memory of what he’d said after he called you a hero, you pulled out your phone. You and him didn’t really speak outside of work and babysitting schedules, but you were pacing around your room and needed something to give you a semblance of structure, a reassurance - even if it was just for the time. You texted, asking if you were still on for tonight, then went to go make breakfast and inevitably pace some more. He’d gotten back to you about twenty minutes later, confirming the time and giving details of how excited Jack was about it. You smiled at that, praying tonight would be as smooth as humanly possible and you could walk away with an ounce of emotional control. You set an intention, this wouldn’t deepen your feelings for Aaron. Was it a pointless goal? Yes. Was it also highly unlikely to prove true? Yes. But the loose plan you worked around the resolution almost completely extinguished the anxiety that had been blazing for hours now. It would be fine, you thought. Completely and utterly fine. 

The same words were looping through your thoughts when you got to his front door. Casual - but still minorly more dressed up than he’d seen you. You’d put a little extra effort into your appearance, mainly to pass the time if you were honest, and you walked in with mild confidence fueling your steps. You did your best not to ogle him, he was in an attire that was already threatening to unravel the safety net of the goal you set. You were used to the suits hidden beneath blazers you cursed the existence of, maybe a snippet of his forearms when he rolled up his sleeves late at night. Now, though, he sported a simple black tee, more comfortable than you’d ever seen him. Domesticity was practically oozing from the entire situation. You felt the pieces slip into place as Jack ran up behind him, and you almost cried with how badly you wanted this feeling to be your normal. 

“Hey, buddy.” You laughed as he hugged you, reciprocating the act as well as you could from the multiple feet you had on his height. “How’s the arm?”

He raised up his wrist, now gauze free and proudly showed off the scar there. You played up the genuine admiration you felt for him. “That’s a pretty gnarly scar.” He nodded in response, probably feeling cool for the evidence he handled such an injury. “I don’t want to see you back in my operating room, you hear me? Scared the life out of us.” The scolding was playful, and he giggled at your words.

Aaron huffed in agreement, cocking his head to the side slightly. “You can say that again.” Jack looked between you two, smiling and seemingly thinking something neither of you could decipher. To break the moment of silence, Aaron patted his shoulder. “Why don’t you tell her what’s on the menu, buddy?”

He told you, and you hummed along to his words, commenting that it sounded delicious and actually meaning it. He ran away a second later - presumably back to whatever he’d been doing before you got there - and left you and Aaron alone. Venturing into the kitchen, you saw multiple pans and pots sitting neatly on the stove, table set and ready to be utilized. Everything was being kept warm, and you finally gained an appetite after having wrestled with nerves all day. 

“Do you want a drink?” He asked it while entering the kitchen, pausing to look at you. 

“Please.” You were desperate to calm yourself, eager to subdue the shaking of your hands. “Do you have any wine?” You weren’t the biggest fan, but you couldn’t think of a drink more fitting for the evening.

He nodded slightly. “Red or white?”

“White.”

He chuckled. “Thought so.” It was quiet, more to himself than you as he was already walking away from you when he said it. He’d thought about what kind of wine you liked, you thought. He’d thought about you. He pulled two wine glasses down from the cupboard, then walked over to the fridge. He reached above it, barely having to stretch, and pulled an uncorked bottle from the storage up there. You felt your legs tense looking at how tall he was, how sure he was of his actions. Jesus. It’s been five minutes and you were crumbling. You watched his hands as he uncorked the bottle, reading the label and realizing the brand.

You furrowed your eyebrows. “Seems a little fancy for a dinner.”

He laughed under his breath as he finished pouring the glasses, walking back over to sit next to you on the island stools. “You’re a guest of honor.” He placed yours in front of you. “I thought it was fitting.” 

You searched, but couldn’t find the humor in his tone. You raised your eyebrows slightly. “Am I?” It was sarcastic, you needed to stop the heat in your stomach from spreading. “I didn’t know doing your job earned such a title.”

He was drinking as you spoke, finishing his sip before joking back. “You’re a doctor.” He said. “I thought you knew that better than anyone.”

You sucked air through your teeth as if wounded by his words. “Touche.” You took a sip of your drink, relishing the taste. Damn, he didn’t come to play. He laughed, and you set your glass back down. “Ok, I have to know.” He drew his attention to you. “What the hell did Jack need the day to prepare for?” The question had been on your mind since he asked you.

He took a drink, chuckling with a mouthful then swallowing so he could reply. “He actually helped cook most of this.” He nodded towards the stove full of different dishes. “That was what he needed the day for. Time for trial and error.”

You grinned at the thought of Jack and Aaron spending the day in aprons, making sure everything turned out perfect. “That is the cutest thing I’ve ever heard.”

He looked back towards Jack, coloring in the living room, close enough to see but far enough to miss your discussions. “He gets nervous around you.”

That surprised you. “Why on Earth would he be nervous around me?” You took your turn looking at the boy, an idea hitting you and making you feel sick. “Wait, I didn’t do something did I?”

He looked back at you, smiling. “No, no. Nothing like that. He gets nervous because he likes you. He knows who you are to me, too, so he wants to make a good impression.”

Your mind latched onto that sentence and played it like a broken record, bouncing between your ears over and over. “Oh?” Your lips were curling up at the corners, eyebrows furrowing as you got ready to hold him to that statement. “And who might I be to you, Aaron?”

Fuck. He’d let that slip past his lips without even thinking about it. So used to being in the confidential company of his son. Good thing he used to be a lawyer and could lie his ass off. “Most of his sitters aren’t also my coworkers.” He delivered it the smoothest way he could, smiling and drinking to hopefully exude a false comfortability that he certainly wasn’t feeling.

“Mhm.” You narrowed your eyes at him, trying to look sarcastic but in truth downplaying the sting you felt. What if this had been one-sided all along? You hadn’t prepped a safety guide for that.

Luckily, Jack came sprinting into the kitchen a second later, pleading with his father to eat now. Clinging to his leg and declaring how hunger was killing him by the second, dramatically threatening to wither away before your very eyes. You both shared a look, agreeing silently to put the kid out of his misery. The instinctual nature of the act hit you like a bolt of lightning. Both of you so in tune it was comical. The dinner had been lovely, and you reminded yourself to encourage Jack to keep up his cooking hobby. Maybe you could foster a professional chef. You’d talked with them both, light and the happiest you’d felt in a while. There it was, you realized. That weightless feeling you wanted to give him. You felt it in yourself too, and you could only pray it was because he felt it first. When dinner concluded, you’d help clean up while Jack resumed his coloring. His bedtime was soon, and you didn’t want him to spend his last hour washing pans. He was nearly delirious by the time 9:00 graced the clock, tired from the preparation of the day and needing to get to sleep. He’d given you a hug goodnight, thanked you for coming like the gentleman he was, and that was the last you saw of him. The rest of your time there was spent on the couch with Aaron, you both held a second glass of wine, and you noticed it manifest in the blush on his face. He was gorgeous, and you were staring. You know your eyes went to his lips a couple times as he spoke, low and rougher as the time ushered more light out of the sky. You saw his eyes slip down a few times too, this sort of unspoken, agonizing rule of look don’t touch. He’d walked you to the door, thanked you for your attendance, and then you were leaving. Sitting in your car, warm on the inside from both his presence and the anger you felt at yourself for not just kissing him. You were so incredibly needy for this - for him, and that fact just sat with you, like a raincloud constantly in a state of downpour, never letting you forget the pure fucking craving you had for him.

–

You think the start of your blackout was Morgan’s panicked voice over the speaker. You’d been stationed in your typical hut, equipped with medical gear and waiting on someone to need you. It was almost never your team in need of service, typically you were tending to an injured hostage or sometimes the unsub themselves, but never your friends. Your breath had been baited since you’d heard the gun go off. You knew the case was dealing with an aggressive attacker, you’d been expecting a fight, but nothing is ever more excruciating than waiting to hear who the shot was meant for. Derek crying out your name followed by a “get in here. Hotch is down, we need you in here.” had you ready to run the soles of your shoes down to dust just to make it in time. In time. God, in time for what? You’d ran past Emily and Rossi hauling out the unsub, anger evident in their treatment of him. How bad was it? How bad had he got him to have them acting like that?

The scene was bloody. Your brain switching off and forcing you into autopilot as you registered the pool of Hotch’s blood that Morgan was kneeling in. He was putting pressure on the wound, an attempt to stop the bleeding but it was flowing like a river. He wouldn’t make it to the hospital like this, you realized. He wouldn’t make it to the fucking hospital. You were holding his life in between your hands right now, the slightest tremor could sever that chord and you were feeling the pressure hard. Aaron was leaned against the wall, slumping down slightly which was only making the bleeding increase under the internal pressure. 

You looked at Morgan, putting on the bravest face you could muster and effectively seizing control of the situation. “Morgan.” You got his attention quickly. “On three I need you to lift him away from the wall. I need to check for an exit wound.” He just nodded, doing exactly as you’d told him when you reached three. You checked the area, finding an exit wound in nearly the same spot. It’d been a straight line. You sighed in relief. Thank fucking God. “Ok, Morgan, I need you to put pressure on the wound on his back. I’m going to stitch the front to give us the time we need for the hospital drive but I need you to hold it. You got me?” 

He nodded once. “I got it.” He moved his hand from the front to the back, Aaron wincing at the switch.

You took out the numbing cream from your pack, knowing it wouldn’t do much for a gushing bullet wound but hoping it would at least quell the sting of a needle. You took out the needle, threading it with hands frighteningly stagnant as the adrenaline gave you tunnel vision. You had to save him. “Aaron.” You looked at him as you prepped his skin for the procedure. “I’m gonna need to double stitch this, and it’s gonna hurt like hell. I need you to stay with me.” 

The man just nodded, exhaling in exhaustion. “Do it.”

You worked as quickly as possible, gaining hope as you listened to the ambulance approach. “There you go.” You said under your breath, at this point you couldn’t tell if you were reassuring him or yourself.  You looked to Morgan, who was still sealing the other injury. “Help me get him up. Keep your hand on there. These stitches are gonna give us twenty minutes tops. Hold his shoulders straight and walk quickly.” You counted again, both of you rising when you hit three, taking the man with you. The walk to the ambulance was the longest of your life. Aaron was clinging to his consciousness but you knew he was losing grip. Finally getting him to the stretcher and slamming the doors was a relief like nothing else. There was no time to debate anyone else going, you rushed him in and sat right down beside him, taking off almost immediately after. The bleeding had slowed, and your hand took the place of Morgan’s on his back. Since he was laying down, his full weight was on it, and you felt the circulation lessen more and more as it remained there. You couldn’t care less, you’d let the blood drain from your entire arm if it meant Aaron’s survival. He hadn’t passed out, which you thought was miraculous, simply walked the line of decently delirious. Groaning under his breath at every slight bump in the road. 

“Why am I always having to save you Hotchner men?” You knew now wasn’t the time to be humorous, but you would have done anything to deviate from the tears in your eyes, the ball in your throat. You finally understood why it was frowned upon to date coworkers - it should be illegal to care this much. 

“I don’t know, honey.” The pet name was the kicker, allowing a tear to break the dam and roll down your cheek as he chuckled. “You seem to be pretty damn good at it, though.” You laughed too, fighting the devastation you felt at the sight of him with the fact that he was clearly well enough to still be joking. “I should have kissed you when you came for dinner.”

Fuck. “Aaron, now is not the time.” You chuckled slightly as more tears fell. This is absurd.

“I know but-” He flinched as the ambulance hit another bump. Almost there. “I might as well say it now.” You wondered if there was genuinely something wrong with him. “You’ve been all I can think about since the moment-'' He paused to breathe slightly in exertion, you giving a disapproving look as his confession took it’s toll. “since the moment you started, you know that?”

“You are dying! Please, for the love of God, Aaron. Use this energy to prevent that from happening.” Your scolding was dramatic, but your actual concern shone brightly through your ruse of sarcasm. 

“Exactly.” He was being equally as sarcastic. How on Earth did he manage this with a rapidly declining life force. “Give a dying man a chance. How unfortunate would it be if the last thing I hear before I go out is the woman of my dreams rejecting me?”

“Jesus Christ.” You shook your head in pure amazement. This was by far the most goal oriented man you’d ever met. “I’ll let you take me out if you shut the hell up and save your energy.” He smiled, letting his head hit the reclined back of the stretcher. “After you get better.” You added, reminding him that his recovery took priority. “Deal?”

“Deal.” This was probably the most insufferable man you’d ever met. “Such a good motivator.”

Scratch that. Most insufferable man ever.

[delusional-day-dreamer]

First. Love. Part² - p.b

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‣ paige bueckers x oc

‣ wc: 12079 (this took me way too long but I got carried away...)

‣‣ synopsis: background on paige and jenna's relationship, how they met, fell in love, and how paige ended up becoming jenna's first heartbreak and eternal muse.

‣‣‣ a/n: So High School Part 2 will be out soon (i have no idea where to take the plot in that series 😔), this is sort of a filler chapter in between the podcast episode in part 3 to give context. EDIT: I changed Jenna's major to be Business Economics with a minor in Film, Television, and Digital Media because it's more relevant for the later plot!

June 30th, 2016 (summer before freshman year; 14 years old)

Jenna's POV:

You didn't know how much more of this stupid city you could handle. You had just locked your front door behind you as you left to go to the pool inside your new neighborhood, excited to read a book you had bought the other day while sunbathing on a lounge chair.

Your parents had just uprooted your life and moved you from San Diego, California, land of sunshine, beaches, and only a small amount of criminal activity, to middle of nowhere Hopkins, Minnesota, right before you started high school with all of your old friends.

Of course you understood that this was for the better of your family, both of your parents had gotten new jobs at a huge hospital with far better pay than their previous ones, they found a beautiful house in a nice neighborhood close to what was going to be your new school, and living in your dad's hometown meant being close to his family.

However, none of these facts soothed the bitter taste in your mouth that formed at the thought of having to be the new kid, having no friends to hang out with for the rest of summer or to start school off with, no job or classes to distract your never-ending train of thoughts, and you didn't even have a sibling to act as your built in friend.

Regardless, you tried your best to adjust to your new, albeit lonely, life by distracting yourself as much as possible. Your parents had re-enrolled you in music lessons the same week you finished moving into your house, gave you an allowance to buy new clothes and hang out at the local mall, as you very quickly realized your Californian wardrobe would not fit the Minnesota weather, despite it being summertime (although you hadn't gone yet as you hated shopping alone), and you had even been going to the pool frequently with the hopes of meeting kids close to your age.

And it just so happened that today, your prayers had been answered. As you were walking down the street, the door to a house you had just crossed by across the street had barely opened before a small boy barrels out, closely followed by a taller, blonde girl who appeared to be around your age, locking the door behind the two of them. You weren't able to put a finger on it, but there was simply something about the girl that was mesmerizing, just a quick glance at her had you wanting to know more.

You had always known you liked girls to some extent, you always found yourself gazing at the t.v. in wonder at the beautiful girls displayed upon the screen. However, it wasn't until probably a hundred, "Am I Gay?" internet quizzes later in seventh grade you recognized the fact that you were queer and were in fact attracted to girls, you just didn't bother telling anyone about this revelation.

In particular, the girl in front of you invoked millions of questions that raced through your mind: who was she, was she your age, was she going to the same high school as you, and most importantly, why was she so pretty? Her blonde hair cascaded down her back with a slight wave to them, her white oversized t-shirt and black basketball shorts draped over her tall frame, and her voice that rang out as she scolded the little boy who ran in front of her to the end of their walkway.

God, her voice was the most intoxicating thing you had ever heard, luring you into her like a siren's song to the depths of the ocean. You swore you were floating at the twinkling sound of her laughter echoing around the block as she joked with, who you head her refer to as, her little brother.

You snapped out of your stunned daze and continued walking forward as she followed her little brother onto the main sidewalk, now almost parallel with your frame. You were mentally counting your blessings that she hadn't looked up enough to see your stalker-esque figure staring at her, although you were praying that she happened to be going to the pool as well (definitely not so you could look at her some more).

Truly, God had decided to pay special attention to you today, as your blonde neighbor grabbed her little brother's hand as she crossed the street, making her way towards you. You couldn't help but glance at her as she approached you, and you were taken aback by the shockingly blue eyes that met yours. You gave her a tight-lipped smile as she stepped up to the sidewalk just behind you, hoping your internal panic wasn't apparent on your face as you faced forward once again.

Your focus on taking deep breaths in and out to not embarrass yourself in front of the first person your age you've even made eye contact with in the last month is interrupted by the little boy running past you, gently bumping into your leg as he brushes past you. His short legs are working overtime to maintain a pace faster than both you and the pretty stranger, who had now jogged up next to you to keep close to her brother.

"Drew the pool isn't gonna run away by the time we get there, you gotta slow down buddy," She called out to the curly-headed child, turning her head to peer slightly down at you.

"Sorry about him, he gets really ahead of himself sometimes," She apologized on his behalf, her eyes scanning over your face. Before giving you a chance to reply, she continued on. "Are you new to the neighborhood? I don't think I've ever seen you around?" She questions, your heart slightly speeding up at the undivided attention she was paying to your face.

"No yeah I am, I just moved here from California," you replied, tucking your hands into the pockets of your shorts to avoid any nervous flailing.

"No way, that's so cool, I've always wanted to visit. Did you live next to the beaches? One of my old friends went there for vacation and she loved it, like she wouldn't shut up about how nice it is over there. I think she went somewhere close to LA. Wait are you going to the pool too?" Her outgoing demeanor surprised you. You had only seen her for the first time a minute ago, and she was already carrying you into a conversation about your old life.

"Yeah I did and I am, I lived in San Diego so the beaches there were really nice compared to the northern part. I miss being able to go there all the time, so I guess for now the pool will just have to do," you joked back, and your heart fluttered at the smile that broke out on her face.

It had appeared that you made your first friend in Hopkins, Minnesota, and unbeknownst to you, she would quickly become your first ever best friend. Then your first girlfriend, your first love, and then slowly, your first and last heartbreak.

April 4th, 2017 (spring break, freshman year; 15 years old)

Paige's POV:

"Dude there's no way you think pancakes are supposed to be better than waffles, they're so boring," I protested on my bed next to Jenna, rolling onto my stomach towards her and propping up my elbows so I could look at her. Jenna had somehow become my best friend within the span of two months during summer, and although I was unsure of when and how her presence became so prominent in my life in such a quick span of time, I was nothing but grateful.

We had started high school together and even had a class together everyday, which was a saving grace for both of us. She came to every single one of my home games this season, even some of the closer away games. She made it to more of my games that any person in my family did, which surprised me, but she just was always there for me somehow.

I was never the best at making friends outside of basketball, the sport was my comfort zone and it was always so much easier to relate to my teammates who felt the same. Yet, me and Jenna just clicked, despite our many differences. Hanging out with her quenches a thirst within me I didn't know I had. A thirst to be seen, to be heard and known, a desire for someone to see me past all my future athletic potential and to just see me, and without fail, she did that for me. Every. Time.

One of the things we discovered early into our friendship, the first time she came over to my house to hang out, were our matching initials. PB and JS, which we affectionately coined to be our nicknames, Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich (pretend pazzi does not own this nickname). Jenna always says that our matching initials are a sign from above, a sign that we're meant to stick by the other's side. We even bought matching necklaces with our initials over winter break as a mutual Christmas present, mine was silver and hers was gold.

Our parents loved the nickname as well, joking that it's the reason they can never separate us, as you just can't have one without the other. Our families somehow became intertwined over the course of our friendship as well, trading in between carpool duties, spending long weekends and the occasional holiday together, and even coming to cheer me on at my basketball games or watching Jenna's dance recitals from the class she took instead of P.E. We all even went out to eat together to celebrate me and Jenna's small freshmen year milestones, like our birthdays.

Hers was a bit before mine, September 21st, 2001, which made her just slightly older than me. Apparently according to the Minnesota school laws or whatever, Jenna is supposed to be in the grade above, but California has different age cutoffs so she's one of the oldest people in our grade.

She confessed to me before school started that she was nervous about being the eldest out of everyone, but I reassured her by saying that it just meant she could drive the two of us around and do a bunch of other things before everyone else could. That really helped.

She even let me into her secret world of music, I knew she took classes but until she played and sang for me, I didn't realize just how good she was. She was fairly shy when it came to her talent, and almost never played in front of people she wasn't comfortable with, which is why it felt like an honor when she played a song on the piano or guitar for me, or sang for or with me, whether it was playing from the radio or something small she wrote.

But the thing that really brought us closer together was when Jenna's parents had to go out of town from time to time for their medical conferences, which left her home alone. When she was younger, she always used to go with them, as missing school wasn't that big of a deal. But now, she ended up refusing, insisting that she would be alright home alone.

This didn't fly with either of our families, and our parents eventually came to the conclusion that Jenna could just stay over at our house when needed. It wasn't like me and Jenna didn't have sleepovers all the time anyways, and both me and Drew loved having her over. She even met my Mom and my two other little siblings, Ryan and Lauren. The three of them immediately took to her the way I did, entranced by her presence. She loved hanging out with them too, since she was an only child.

There was something about Jenna that somehow attracted people to her. Maybe it was her welcoming presence, the way she made you feel like the most important person in the world with the way she looked at you, or perhaps it was something appealing about her appearance. The small makeup she put on and the way she spent extra time styling her hair was always unnecessary in my opinion, I always thought she was the prettiest person in our grade.

Sometimes I wondered if the two of us were truly best friends. I know friends hang out a bunch like we do, they don't mind changing in the same room or even in front of each other, and they definitely feel comfortable enough to cuddle together in bed or while watching a movie. Right?

But sometimes I swear there's a weird fluttering in my stomach when Jenna's bare legs drape over mine on the couch, or sometimes my heart skips a beat when we're getting ready for bed and she just pauses while changing her shirt, intent on continuing our conversation even while standing in just her bra.

But it's okay for friends to do that right? I mean, I've only ever had crushes or thought boys were attractive, so everything I'm feeling is probably just from the fact that I've never had a best friend like Jenna. Sure, I've had a bunch of friends and teammates I'm really close to, but me and Jenna spend all of our time together, and there's almost nothing we wouldn't do together. Sometimes, we just take turns showering while the other person stays in the bathroom just so we can keep talking.

Which led the two of us up to now, spending spring break sprawled out on my bed at 9pm, arguing about whether waffles or pancakes were better. We never had any real arguments, but with me and Jenna both being super competitive and never wanting to be wrong, we always had long discussions "fighting" about meaningless topics.

"Pancakes are so much smoother and like, enjoyable to eat compared to waffles, plus waffles end up crispy at the edges and they just end up tasting weird," She insisted, adjusting herself from her back to her side so she could argue with me face to face.

Her hair fell over her shoulder when she moved, leaving her shoulder exposed as her, no, my sweatshirt had slightly slouched down as it was big on her. Jenna wasn't exactly short, she was around 5'5, it's just that I happened to be even taller.

"Girls, come down for dinner please," my step-mom yelled from downstairs before I could even snap out of my distracted state to argue back.

"Coming Mrs. Bueckers," Jenna took the initiative to yell back slightly when I didn't respond in time, still in shock as to why I ended up staring at my best friend, distracted by her bare shoulder in my clothes. Me and Jenna always shared clothes, we even kept clothing and toiletry spares in each others rooms for spontaneous sleepovers. So why was her wearing my sweatshirt, in my bed, so different this time?

Whatever the reason was, I didn't have time to even think it over before Jenna got up from next to me, grabbing my hands with hers so she could yank me up as well, complaining that she was hungry. She kept our hands interlocked as we left my room, walking down the stairs hurridley. It was a miracle she didn't notice that for some reason, her soft, warm hands in mine had left a barely noticeable blush on my cheeks.

October 28th, 2017 (sophomore year; 16 years old)

Jenna's POV:

"Come on J hurry up, it's just a stupid party," Paige walked into your bathroom as you were almost finished curling your hair. "I'm on my last section P chill, I'll be done in a minute," you reassured her reflection. The two of you were invited to a Halloween party, but apparently you weren't supposed to dress up since technically it's not Halloween yet? (skinny jeans were the shit in 2017 but I can't bring myself to write that that's what they're wearing 😔)

You were both confused about it but the junior who invited you guys, Alexa, was one of your friends from math class. You were sat together on the first day and despite both of you struggling here and there, you often got the concepts a little bit quicker than her, so you always helped her when possible. And in return, she got the two of you an invite, well technically she invited you but everyone knows you and Paige are a package deal, to one of the biggest house parties of the school year.

It was also going to be the first party you were ever going to, and you both agreed to not go overboard on the drinks, since your aunt cristina, who was visiting, was going to pick and drop you in her car. Your mom's sister couldn't have chosen a better time to come visit, as both of your parents were working the night shift tonight and Paige's parents allowed her to sleepover at your house since your aunt was supposed to "supervise".

"See, I'm ready, let's go," you told Paige as you finished your hair with a thin layer of hairspray, moving past her into your room to grab your phone and keys. Your parents had gotten you a used Ford F-150 truck (so gay) so it would be easier for you to drive to school, with Paige of course, since they both started working longer hours now that you were old enough to take care of yourself and so that they could retire earlier.

You both made your way downstairs to your Aunt Cristina on the couch, watching tv while waiting for you to finish getting ready. "Ready to hit the road girls?" She got up to turn off the tv and grab her things from around the living room.

"Yup, thank you again for taking us, and for not telling our parents," Paige responded on your behalf as well. It was typical of adults to love Paige, she was always the most respectful and responsible kid in their eyes, even when thanking your aunt for driving you to a party so you could drink responsibly.

"No problem, I'd rather you girls be safe while having fun, no point in sneaking out if I'm here for you," She joked as you moved to get in her car, and within ten minutes, the three of you were pulled up outside the address Alexa had given you.

"Now please just remember to be safe, have fun, drink responsibly, don't leave your drinks unattended, don't try drinks from random people, keep your phone on you, don't leave each other's side," Your aunt was rambling off safety rules to the two of you in the backseat. You thought it was ironic she had to mention for you to stay together as if you ever left each other's side anyways.

"Yes Auntie C of course," You promised her as you moved to open the car door, "We'll be safe and I'll text you, love you, thanks, bye!" You closed the door the second Paige climbed out from the backseat, eager to walk into the house you could hear music blaring out of.

Before you knew it, the two of you were sitting pressed up together on a couch in a crowded living room, two red solo cups in hand with sprite and vodka. You and Paige were tipsy from the past two hours of drinking, a warm fuzziness settled into our brains, making the circle of people around us funnier than they probably were.

"No you know what we should play, seven minutes in heaven!" A drunk junior called out mid-conversation. You weren't really absorbing anything that was being said around you until that, and the loud cheers that erupted from the living room at the suggestion.

"Everybody gather around in a circle on the floor, whoever spins it has to go in the guest bedroom with the person it lands on for seven minutes," Alexa called out to everyone as she reached for an empty beer bottle behind her, before moving to sit on the floor.

"D'you wanna play?" Paige asked quietly next to you. You could tell she was hesitant on joining, and would only sit down if you went with her or dragged her with you.

"Why not, what are the chances we get picked anyways?" You decided, downing the last sip of your drink before setting it down on the floor, pulling Paige off the couch with you and into the circle.

"Before we start," Alexa loudly interrupted the conversation of the circle as she placed the beer bottle in the middle, causing everyone to quiet down and listen to her. "If you get picked to go in the room, you do not, and I repeat do not, have to do anything. The room stays unlocked the whole time, and you can't force the other person to do anything, even kiss," She insisted, making eye contact with every person in the circle before sitting back down in her spot.

"Agreed?" She asked everyone, and only allowed the game to start after hearing a response from everyone.

The game started and by the fourth round, everyone except one couple had clearly used the seven minutes to their advantage, coming out with tousled hair, bruised lips, and one girl even came out with a visibly red hickey on her neck. You and Paige had yet to be picked, and you felt a sense of relief that the two of you got to participate without having to actually play the game.

But, you suppose you must have spoken (or thought) too soon though, as you watched the next guy spin the bottle, and it slowed to a stop, the neck pointing right at you. Encouragements and cheers burst from the circle, urging the two of us to go in the room. You recognized who he was from around campus and his games, a junior volleyball player.

He got up from his seat, walking across the circle to you, and offering his hand to pull you up. You looked over hesitantly at Paige, who was barely meeting your eyes and had a small, tight-lipped smile on her face. Ignoring her reaction, you took his hand in yours and allowed him to hoist you up, dropping it the moment you stood in front of him.

You walked into the room first, sitting on the desk pushed up against the wall as he closed the door behind him and walked up to you, leaving a foot of space in between you two, presumably waiting for you to give him some sort of indicator.

"I'm sorry, I hope you don't really mind but I wasn't really planning on getting picked and I'm not comfortable, like, kissing you or anything so if you want to pick someone else I get it, I just don't want to," the nervous ramble poured out of you without constraint, the alcohol you had consumed making you more open-lipped than normal.

"Hey it's cool, you heard Alexa, you don't have to do anything if you don't want to," he shrugged, moving to take a seat on the edge of the queen bed in the room.

"Oh, thank you, I guess. I didn't think you would be so cool about your turn being wasted," You settled on top of the desk properly, turning to face the boy who was surprisingly chill.

"Nah it's whatever, I just broke up with my girlfriend like a month ago too, so I don't really care. I'm Jeremy by the way," he introduced, bringing one foot off the floor to rest over his other knee, leaning slightly back onto the bed.

"I'm Jenna, this is my first party so I wasn't really sure how all of this was gonna go."

"Jenna, I swear I've heard your name before," he paused, thinking for a moment. "Ohh, you’re the one who's friends with the basketball girl, Paige something right?" He suddenly remembered.

"Yeah I came with her tonight, she's my best friend," You smiled, talking about Paige was one of the easiest things in the world for you. You knew everything about her, inside and out, and majority of people knew you through her, since her athleticism made her quite popular around school. You never minded being known as Paige's best friend though, you knew you had your own identity and Paige always reminded anyone who referred to you as that, but there was a certain comfort that your friendship was strong enough for even a stranger to know that about you.

You and Jeremy continued small talking about school and a little bit about his ex-girlfriend before a knock rang out from the door, signaling that your time was up. He got up before you and held the door open as you walked out, instantly being bombarded with excited whoops and teasing "oooo's" as you walked to join the circle again.

"We didn't even do anything, guys" Jeremy emphasized to the circle, attempting to calm the rambunctious circle.

"Then why is she red as a tomato? The girl couldn't be blushing harder if she tried," a random girl in the circle yelled out, revving up the groups fever.

"She's like sixteen, chill out. Besides it's probably cause all of you," Jeremy backed you up as you walked over to your previous seat, but before you sat back down, you realized Paige was no longer there.

"Where did Paige go?" You asked the group before the next person could spin the bottle, causing eyes to shoot up at you.

"She went to the kitchen for a refill, so probably still there," Alexa informed you. You nodded at her before walking away, searching for your missing best friend.

You didn't have to look for long before you found her taking a shot in the kitchen with two other random girls, her face souring heavily at the alcoholic taste. You knew Paige hated the taste of alcohol and was never one to submit to peer-pressure, so why was she taking a shot of tequila with strangers?

"Hey P," you walked up to her, resting your hand on her bicep to draw her attention to you.

"Hey J," she responded dryly, but her voice was slightly slurred, moving her arm out of your hold to swap out the shot class for a full solo cup you could only pray she filled herself.

"You wanna leave soon? It's already like one ish?"

"Sure, whatever," she took a long sip from her cup, downing half of whatever she had poured in it.

"Okay, we can wait outside, let the cold air sober us up a bit before Auntie C gets here," you gently pried the red plastic cup out of her hand before grabbing her hand and leading her out to the living room, saying bye to the small amount of friends you knew before walking outside.

The two of you settled onto the edge of the curb at the ending curve of the sidewalk, just far enough from the house to get a little quiet. The stuffed house had been slightly humid, and the light breeze was a refreshing contrast to your previous environment.

"How was it?" Paige's question broke the quiet but tension-filled bubble the two of you had formed.

"How was what?"

"Your seven minutes in heaven," Paige drunkenly mocked.

"P, we didn't do anything. Like, anything anything," you were confused at her attitude, did she know something about Jeremy, or dislike him for some reason?

"You, you didn't kiss him?" The shock was apparent on her face. "The second you left everyone was talking about Jeremy and Jenna kissing in a tree, it was really annoying," she grumbled, you concluded that the alcohol she had consumed must be what was making her weird.

"No way P, I don't want my first kiss to be like that. Forced and with someone I don't even know, let alone like," you scooched closer into her, resting your head on her shoulder.

You awaited a response from her but never get one, she simply leaned her head on top of yours as you waited in a comfortable silence for your ride, which came quickly.

*small time skip*

You had just finished your short skincare routine and were finally ready to climb into bed with Paige, the long night had taken its toll on you, and you were ready to collapse into the warm embrace of your best friend. But tonight, when you laid down next to her in bed, she didn't immediately cuddle into you like she always did, remaining flat on her back, staring at your ceiling.

Instead, she turned over to face you, only a few inches of space were left in between your faces as she whispered to you, "Why didn't you kiss him?"

Her question shocked you. The two of you rarely visited the topic of romantic relationships or feelings of the sort, and both of you agreed that you weren't interested in the thought as of right now.

"I," you paused. You had never officially come out to Paige, afraid that once she knew you liked girls, your every move would be scrutinized and judged, and your relationship would never be the same. But surely, you insisted internally, Paige wasn't going to be like that.

"I wasn't really interested in the thought of kissing a guy," You quietly admitted, rolling back over onto your back to avoid her gaze.

"Oh." That was it? You basically just came out to her and that's all you got?

"Would you ever kiss a guy? Or just," she paused, the hesitation clear in her voice. "Just girls?"

"No I would kiss both, I just don't think I want my first kiss to be with one? Or at least not Jeremy," you confessed quietly, turning your head back over to look at her. She was staring intently at you, scanning your face.

"Who would you want your first kiss to be with?"

"I don't know, but at least with someone I'm close to. Have you ever," you waited a moment before finishing your sentence, taking a deep breath in between your words.

"Have you ever thought about kissing girls? Or a girl?" You whispered, watching her slightly panicked reaction.

"A few times, but I've never kissed anyone either, so I don't know," Her eyes darted in between your eyes and down to your lips. "What if you kiss me? Just so we can both have our first kisses with someone we know," in retrospect, you should've thought harder before agreeing to kiss your previously assumed straight best friend. But her offer set off a flurry of butterflies in your stomach, your cheeks flushed deeply as you nodded.

You shuffled closer to her in bed, such that there was barely an inch of space separating your lips. "Are you sure about this?" You whispered, staring down at her lips while reaching your hand to cup her jaw, the other arm bent at the elbow to support your body above hers.

"Yeah," she nodded, looking down at your own lips, slightly moving in until your lips grazed against hers. You pressed your lips a little firmer into hers, slanting your head further as your lips barely opened. She moved in tandem with you, her hand resting at the nape of your neck as she kissed you back.

Your kiss only lasted a few moments, pulling back the second you registered the taste of alcohol still prominent in her mouth. You realized it was possible that the only reason your best friend asked you to kiss her was because she was drunk, sixteen, and very single.

"This isn't gonna be weird tomorrow is it?" Your brows furrowed as a worried expression settled into your face.

"No, why would it? Friends can kiss, besides we just won't make it weird," she promised. And despite knowing it was a stupid idea, an even stupider statement, you agreed. Collapsing down back onto your pillow, you opened your arms for Paige to snuggle into you, and the two of you drifted into a peaceful slumber.

February 3rd, 2018 (sophomore year; 16 years old)

Paige's POV:

It was a relief to finally find a quiet moment to myself, even if it was at three in the morning in the middle of my living room couch. Everyone in my house was asleep, including Jenna, who was still snoring when I extracted myself from her arms. The ac vent aimed straight at me caused me to pull the blanket tighter into my body, despite the pajama pants I was wearing and one of Jenna's hoodies.

We were almost done with basketball season and were currently playing our conference games, and were thankfully on a streak. And yet, the pressure inside of me continued to build, the need to be perfect and to support and carry my team throughout our games constantly weighing down on me.

Of course my teammates, coaches, family, and my other friends were supportive of me and encouraged me to try my best, and that no one expected perfection of me. But for whatever reason, I couldn't get rid of the anxiety that was constantly taking over my brain, sending me into spiraling panics over my future and my performance.

But throughout the past few months, the only person I felt like I could truly breathe around was Jenna, my lifeline. Despite not being involved in basketball in any way, she understood me and what I was feeling. She confided in me about her having chronic anxiety (GAD) the first time I slept over at her house, when I saw her medication on the dinner table.

She taught me breathing exercises and calming methods, held and comforted me when I cried in the middle of the night from the constant mental pressure, and even told me that I should slide around my initial charm on our matching necklace since it was a better nervous habit than biting my nails.

Even besides that, her presence in itself was a comfort to me, even if I wasn't yet sure of how deep my feelings for her went. She was the first friend I ever said "I love you" too, and I think the same goes for her. And it is true, I do love her with my whole heart, I would do anything she asked or needed of me, I just wasn't sure to what extent this love went.

Along with that, I was still unsure of where I stood with my sexuality. Before Jenna, I never thought about girls in a more than platonic way, but from the first few months of getting to know her, to our first kiss together (still the only time I've ever kissed anybody), to even now, where she was cuddled into my chest a mere thirty minutes ago, I felt electrifying sparks course through my body at her touch, she could make me blush with the most innocent of looks, and she made me giddy in a way even basketball didn't.

But despite all that, it's normal for best friends to love each other? It doesn't automatically mean being gay or being in love, you could just deeply care for the other person. Besides, Jenna never brought up the kiss again, which meant it had probably only happened due to both of our inebriated states.

It was as if my deep train of thought about her cause her to miraculously appear, I knew it was her just from the footsteps upstairs, the way she gently walked down the stairs to avoid a creaky step, and the way her sock-covered feet padded over to the couch, grabbing a throw blanket for herself before taking a seat in the corner end of the couch next as me.

We sat in silence as she reached over to the side of the couch, pushing the button to recline the seat back, unfolding the blanket and covering her bottom half before patting her lap for me once she was fully adjusted.

I all but threw my head into her lap, facing her body, as I extended my legs out onto the rest of the sofa as I moved my arms up hug the tops of her legs as her hands came up to gently scratch at my scalp, playing with my hair in a way that immediately relaxed me into her.

"M'sorry if I woke you," I whispered into her stomach, even though I wasn't actually sorry. I was selfishly happy that she came downstairs for me and would give up anything for us to have more of these quiet moments together, her attention solely focused on me.

"S'okay P, you technically didn't. I felt the bed was empty and then my spidey senses told me you were thinking too hard again, so I came to convince you to come back to bed, but then this beautiful couch looked way too comfortable, so we can just spend the night here," she sleepily mumbled, looking down at me sprawled out onto her lap.

"Tell me who or what is stealing our sleep so I can beat their asses," she joked quietly, her hands coming to rub at my temples.

I sighed, it felt as if her hands were physically melting the pounding in my skull, my headache nearly subsiding just from her touch.

"Just stressed out about everything again y'know? Basketball, school, life, kind of everything," I admitted quietly. The one thing I hated doing, was talking about things that bothered or upset me, it always made me feel weak.

"Hey, we are all so proud of you P. We all know how hard you're working and even though you feel like it, I promise that it's not all up to you. All the people around you love you, and we're all here to help if you need it. You just say the word and we'll all line up for whatever you need," she reassured me, only slightly teasing as her fingers moved to pinch my cheek lightly before moving back to my hair.

"Yeah I know, God really blessed me with you guys. Especially you, I don't know what I would do without you," I murmured up at her, smiling at her sleepy but happy expression.

"Yeah yeah, just say you love me Paige," she poked fun at me quietly, letting her head drop onto the cushion behind her without breaking eye contact with me.

"Hey I do love you J, I say it all the time," I retorted, using my fingers to draw small shapes on her pajama-covered thighs.

"Well I love you too P," her hands smoothed over my hair as she bent down to press a kiss on my hairline before reaching back up to settle into the couch.

"Just trust me, you just need to do all you can so God can do all you can't," she muttered, closing her eyes as she leaned her head slightly onto her shoulder to get comfortable, all without stilling her hands' movements in my scalp.

"Hey that's a sick quote, I'm stealing that from you for my interviews," I teased groggily, the lack of sleep slowly overcoming my voice.

"You can have anything you want from me P, you already know that," she didn't open her eyes when she said that, but I could hear the sincerity in her tone even without looking at her.

The two of us slept the whole night in the exact same position, unaware of everyone waking up to us cuddling on the couch together. My eyes only fluttered open at the sound of quieted laughter and the shuttering of two cameras pointed at the two of us.

As I rolled my head out of Jenna's lap to look at whoever had caused the disturbance, I squinted my eyes to see my dad with his polaroid and Drew using someone's phone. I groaned, burying myself back into Jenna, I probably would never hear the end of this, but it was alright, because it was with Jenna.

July 4th, 2018 (summer before junior year; 16 years old)

Jenna's POV:

"Jenna you need to slow down, I don't want you to throw up or anything," Paige insisted as she walked up to you, pulling you away from the living room of the house party you were in, preventing you from throwing back another shot. The party was hosted by a senior at the end of your neighborhood, just walking distance from both of your houses.

"What's your problem P, I'm just having fun," you argued back, doing your best to enunciate your words to prevent having a slur, knowing she would cut you off immediately if you got too drunk. You were pretty good at holding your liquor, somehow being a natural heavy-weight when it came to drinking.

"Come on Paigey, just lighten up a little, it's the fourth of fucking July, have fun with me. Ooo, we should do a shot together," you elbowed her side jokingly, looking up at her hesitant expression with your best puppy dog eyes.

Her concerned expression softened, you knew it was wrong of you to take advantage of the fact she could never say no to you, but she was the reason you were adamant on drinking to the point of memory loss tonight.

As shameful as it felt to admit it, your best friend had been haunting your every waking moment for the last few months, and you were desperate for an escape from your own thoughts. You always knew you felt something deeper than friendship for Paige, the way your heartbeat would speed up at every touch of her hands, the way you found yourself unable to tear your eyes off of her, on and off the court, and especially, the way you could not escape the mental replay of your kiss.

The press of her soft lips against yours, the slight vanilla taste from her chapstick you so often borrowed, the way the skin of her jaw felt so soft in the palm of your hand, and the way your body melted into hers, pressed against her warm figure.

So, like any reasonable sixteen year old, you were determined to get absolutely shit-faced tonight, to the point where you wouldn't even be able to remember your own name. And the only way that would happen, is if Paige stopped monitoring your every sip of alcohol.

"Okay fine, one shot, but that's it. We can't both be super drunk," She relented, allowing you to pull her back into the kitchen to pour yourself shots.

And just to your luck, Paige had run into a few friends and teammates, leaving you alone with a few class friends for what she intended to be only a few minutes, but ended up being a little over half an hour. Those thirty ish minutes were all you needed to take two more shots, chug one whiteclaw and two beers, and finish a cup of a vodka sprite.

By the time Paige came back, still mostly sober, she was pissed to see that you were plastered, hanging off the shoulder of some guy she could recognize, but was too mad to focus on. She couldn't figure out why you were drinking so much tonight, despite her warning, you were practically making yourself sick for the next day, and you wouldn't even tell her the reason you had been off lately, brushing it off with some bullshitted excuse of school or your parents.

"Yo, who's the blonde chick staring at you?" The random guy you were talking to asked, nodding his head towards Paige, who was leaned against one of the kitchen counters and boring holes into the guy's head.

"Paigeyyy," you called out, lifting your now very heavy head from his shoulder as he pointed out your best friend who was now within eyeline, a deeply annoyed expression settled into her otherwise soft features.

"Hey me and Jenna are gonna head out, it's already past two and she's clearly done drinking for tonight," Paige announced to the group of friends you were hanging out with as she moved towards you, gently guiding your arm over shoulder and pulling you away from the other guy.

"Hey she's fine," the guy you were previously all over slightly slurred, "What are you her babysitter or somethin?"

"Dude worry about yourself, you look like you’re two seconds away from passing out," she snapped at him before walking away, supporting around half of your weight as the two of you exited the house.

"You're always so good to me Paigey, always my taking care of me," you drunkenly mumbled into her shoulder, pressing yourself further into her in an attempt to warm yourself up with her body heat. The summer night in Minnesota wasn't too bad, but your lack of a jacket wasn't helping.

"We'll reach your house in like five minutes, you just gotta walk till there okay?" She spoke firmly, avoiding glancing down at your slouched figure attached to her.

"You're always my best girl," you continued your drunken ramble.

"Always there fo' me, you cuddle me and you kiss me, and you even walk me home," for some selfish reason, she didn't have it in her to stop you. She knew it wasn't fair to you, letting you pour your innermost thoughts or feelings out to her when you weren't in the right state of mind, but she couldn't bear to stop the compliments gushing from your mouth.

"No need to date anyone in the whole wide world when I have you. You're so much nicer than the other girls. Or boys. And prettier. You're the prettiest out of all of them. So pretty, even when you're all sweaty and gross in basketball. You even kiss nice, don't wanna kiss anyone else after you kissed me," she finally cut your mindless babble into her neck off.

"We're here, I need your keys," her voice was curt, almost like she didn't want to be with you anymore. You lifted your head out of the crook of her neck to fumble around the pockets of your jeans, finally pulling out your lanyard and holding it out for her.

She took it from your grasp quickly, unlocking your house and helping you in to take both of your shoes off and lead you up into your bathroom, sitting you on the closed toilet as she went into your room to grab a change of clothes for you.

You leaned your head back in the two minutes she had left, closing your eyes and barely drifting off when she re-entered the bathroom, waking you up so she could help you change and take off your makeup.

It wasn't until you were sitting against the headboard of your bed, watching her move around your room to collect stray clothes from the floor into your hamper that the two of you finally spoke again.

"Paigey are you mad at me?" the nickname slipped from your mouth once again as you questioned her quietly. Paigey was something that usually only Drew called her regularly, but for some reason it was the only thing you referred to her as when drunk.

"Yes Jenna, is that what you wanna hear? That I'm fucking pissed off at you? You've been acting weird for the last like, two months. And no matter how much I try, you won't open up to me, it's frustrating me," she exclaimed pausing her movements around the room to rant to you despite her better judgement telling her she shouldn't talk to you about this while you're drunk.

"And then tonight you're all over some random douche, pretending like everything is fine when you know it's not. Then you start spewing that bullshit about me I know you don't mean because you're drunk."

You stayed silent for a few moments before you responded, "'M sorry, I shouldn't have shut you out for something you didn't do. But saying I don't mean what I said? That's not fair and you know it."

"Stop it Jenna, I think that you should just go to sleep. You're so drunk, you're not even coherent anymore, and I don't want to have this conversation with you like this,"

"What if I just wanna tell you how pretty you are, or how nice you kiss? Or that I love-"

"Stop Jenna, please just stop," Paige shut her eyes, her voice sounding nearly painful.

"Please J, you're drunk and you don't mean it. You can't say things like that and not mean it to me, I can't take it," she begged.

"If I say it to you tomorrow will you believe me?" you whispered, hesitating before continuing.

"If I tell you I love you tomorrow, will you say it back? Will you mean it the same way I mean it?" you pleaded with her, desperate to hear that she felt the same way you did, that you weren’t the only idiot who had fallen in love with her best friend.

"I'm gonna sleep on the couch," she muttered, walking out of your room and closing the door behind her. You could feel your heart sinking, the tears burning in your eyes, threatening to pour out at the smallest movement.

You stare at the door for a few minutes, praying that Paige would change her mind, burst back in and say that she did love you too, that you weren’t alone. She would pull you into her, kiss you stupid, and cuddle you for the rest of the night.

But she didn't and you eventually cried yourself into an uncomfortable sleep, tossing and turning the whole night.

***the next morning***

Your eyes fluttered open from the sunlight beaming through my half-closed curtains. Your head was pounding, threatening to split in half as you turned over, burying yourself into the pillow underneath your comforter.

You tried my best to recall what had happened last night that left you nearly dead the next morning. As you fought to focus despite a dry throat, aching body, and throbbing head, a specific moment came pouring back.

There was no fucking way.

You told Paige, presumably straight Paige, your best friend ever Paige, that you loved her. You had gone on a whole fucking tangent about how pretty she was, how nobody could compare, and the fact that you loved her.

You shot up in bed, fighting every painful twinge in your body to reach for your phone, when you saw a water bottle with two advils on your nightstand. You quickly chugged them as you reached for your phone, unplugging it from the charger. That was something you had most definitely not remembered to do last night.

At 7:21 in the morning there was only one text from Paige.

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Peanut Butter 💜: Hey, my step-mom called me over to help her clean some stuff up. You went pretty hard last night so I left some water and painkillers for you, make sure you take them and eat breakfast. I'll see you later yeah?

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Fuck, did she not remember what had happened last night? No, that wasn't possible, she barely drank. Did she want to pretend like it never happened? Was it because she didn't feel the same about you? As it was, she didn't allow you to finish saying you were in love with her, and it wasn't like she said it back. Was she trying to avoid ruining your friendship?

She had texted you almost three hours ago, which meant your parents had to already be back from their night shift and everyone in her house was probably awake.

You threw your phone out onto your bed, slamming yourself back down and under your covers.

What were your options here? Either pretend like it never happened and continue hopelessly pining after your best friend, confess your feelings only to get rejected and ruin your friendship, or the least likely of them all.

You told her and she felt the same.

You thought long and hard about what to do. As much as it would hurt to only be something, continuing to hide your feelings, it would be worse to be nothing to her, right?

But if it had slipped out of you once, wasn't there the chance it could happen again? What if it was even worse the next time, what if it was in public and everyone ended up finding out.

It would be better to own up to the truth now, right? Right? Right, you decided.

You finally mustered up the courage to leave the safe haven of your bed. dragging yourself to the bathroom to freshen up (ESPECIALLY BRUSHING YOUR TEETH) before quietly exiting your house, walking across the street to hers.

You knocked on the door firmly, knowing the Bueckers weren't the biggest fans of using the doorbell.

"Jenna," Drew exclaimed as he opened the door for you, allowing you into the house you had quickly claimed as your second home.

"What's up little man," you greeted him while taking off your slippers, "Where's your sister?" You asked him.

You had made it a habit to call Paige, Drew's sister, when talking to him. You felt bad that people always mentioned him as Paige's little brother instead of taking two seconds to learn his name, so you always made the effort to make sure he felt seen.

"She's in her room, she said she was feeling weird when she came home and she won't leave her room," he told you.

Shit, that meant she did remember what had happened. Well, it was now or never.

"Thanks Drew, Hi Mrs. Bueckers," you waved to her in the kitchen as you made your way to the stairs, bounding up two at a time to reach Paige's room faster. Her door was shut when you reached, and you knocked lightly on the wood.

"Hey P, it's me," you called out through the closed door, waiting to hear her mumbled, come in, before turning the knob. She was laying down in her bed, putting her phone down as she looked up at you.

"How you feeling Jelly? You drank a lot last night," she asked quietly, her hands fiddling with the top of her comforter, something you knew she did when she was nervous.

"Not that bad," you moved to sit down next to her lying figure, gazing down at her exhausted face. You could tell she hadn't slept well last night either, surely from your intoxicated confession.

"Listen, I know I was really stupid last night, but what we were talking about in my room," Paige cut you off before you could finish.

"Hey it's fine, I get it. You were really drunk and you get kind of emotional at that stage, so it's not even a big deal-"

"Oh my god Paige will you let me even speak? I meant what I said last night," you interrupted. There was no way you would allow her to brush this under the rug the same way you let her pretend your kiss had never happened.

"You're not just my best friend, you're my everything. You mean the literal world to me, there's barely anything I wouldn't do for you, because I'm in love with you. I have been for a reallly really long time now, that's why I was trying to keep my distance. It hurt, being around you and pretending like my heart wasn't going to explode at nearly everything you said or did with me," you professed, watching her expression morph from faked nonchalance to shock, and slowly, a small smile broke out.

"You, you love me love me? Like, you're in love with me? In a more than friends way?" She sat up to face you fully as she questioned you, tucking her bottom lip into her mouth as she waited for your response.

"No shit Sherlock Holmes, it's almost like I said it like four times now, and you're still not-" she didn't let you finish your exasperated sentence before pulling you into her, pressing your lips firmly into hers.

You closed your eyes as you sighed into the minty kiss, melting into her hold as she moved her lips against you slowly, the rest of the world faded away as the two of you found peace in each other's embrace.

"You know you still haven't told me you love me back," you mumbled against her lips as the two of you separated a minute later, a wide grin stretched out across your face.

"No shit I love you too Sherlock Holmes," she teased, using the nickname you had come up with against you. "Have been for a while now, glad you finally noticed," she pulled you into her as she flopped down to lie down on her side, facing you.

The two of you continued to exchange light pecks and languid kisses, reveling in the comfort of your intertwined bodies in Paige's warm bed.

"Does this mean we're dating?" Paige pulled back to watch your face as she asked.

"Yeah P, this means you're my girlfriend now. Just mine, kay?" You beamed, caressing her cheek with your thumb.

"Got it, as long as you're only mine J."

December 23rd, 2019 (Winter Break, senior year; 18 years old)

Paige’s POV:

"I have no idea what that's supposed to mean," Jenna giggled at my response, her laughter rumbling her body against mine. She was currently sprawled over my body in tiny pajama shorts and a cropped tank top, her head laying on my chest as she wrote random words onto my left arm for me to guess, my other hand wrapped tightly over her waist, eliminating any space that may have been between us.

Jenna had finally finished all of her college applications and we both took our winter finals two weeks prior, leaving us to peacefully enjoy our Christmas and New Years together.

We had already been dating for over a year now, and if I wasn't completely and irrevocably head over heels for Jenna Smyths before, I most definitely was now. The two of us were already inseparable even before we started dating, but since last July it was almost like we couldn't spend go more than twenty-four hours apart, which our families had slowly started picking up on.

We never really told my family that we were dating, just slowly started leaving hints here and there. Spending more time together, being more cuddly or touchy with the other person (all pg of course), and we went to our most recent school dances together, as friends, but still.

Even at school or in public, we basically acted the same as we always did, and despite the rumors running rampant in the many gossip circles, no one had any evidence to prove any allegation, and when prompted, we always gave the same answer, "She's my best friend".

But with Jenna's family on the other hand, only her mom knew after a really awkward walking-in incident. It wasn't too bad, it just so happened that one night when I was sleeping over at her house in March, we were innocently making out in her bed, as any seventeen year-old couple did, when her mom walked in to tell us that we were going out for breakfast the next morning. We quickly separated, but not fast enough to evade her mom.

Needless to say, the two of us had to endure a very, very embarrassing conversation of being safe and responsible together, and the only reason she didn't rat us out to Jenna's dad or my family to stop our sleepovers was the fact that neither of us could get pregnant from anything we may or may not do.

Unfortunately, our "separation anxiety problem" proved to be quite the difficult challenge when I had to leave for the team USA basketball games and Jenna went on college tours with her parents. The two of us managed to get by through near constant texting and nightly FaceTime calls, which I've accepted may be the norm for our relationship in the future.

I already committed to UConn back in April, but Jenna still hasn't decided where she wants to go. She's applied sort of everywhere, California, Washington, Michigan, Minnesota, Pennsylvania, New York, and of course, Connecticut. She hasn't told me what her top pick is out of all of her applications, but I had a feeling she was refraining from telling me because it was going to be one of the furthest ones from UConn.

I didn't mind having to do long distance, as hard as it would be, I would take that struggle over losing Jenna any day. But there was a sneaking suspicion in the back of my mind that Jenna didn't agree, that she would rather break up than have to deal with long distance.

But that couldn't happen to us, we were Paige and Jenna, Peanut Butter and Jelly, and there was no way that we would break up because of college. I mean sure, we had real arguments every once in awhile, one of us got a little jealous, or we were tired or annoyed and accidentally took it out on the other person. But those never lasted long, both of us being too weak to remain mad at the other for more than a day.

One of the biggest arguments we had was over one of my newest and closest friends, Azzi Fudd. We met through team USA and got really close really quickly, which Jenna wasn't the fondest of. We never talked about her until I had gotten back, and Jenna finally burst when I paused our conversation to text Azzi back.

It wasn't until after I assured Jenna that Azzi was straight and was definitely not interested in me in anyway since she had a crush on a boy at her school, that she was my girlfriend and the only one I had eyes for, and she met Azzi in person for the first time that she understood just how platonic our friendship was and also formed a connection with the younger girl.

To be fair, Jenna wasn't the only one with slight jealousy issues, or as she called it, me being "territorial", which I wholeheartedly disagree with. I just think that some of the guys and girls she's friends with don't need to be all over her all the time, but Jenna was just a naturally affectionate person who made everyone around her feel loved and seen, and I understood that doesn't necessarily mean in a romantic way.

Which is all to say that despite any minor bumps in the road, our relationship was as steady and strong as ever, and there was no where else in the world I would rather be right now than in bed with Jenna's body covering mine.

"I wrote bball doofus, okay there's no way you don't get this next one," she remarked teasingly. I pinched her side as she stifled her laughter, adjusting herself over me before going to write her next phrase on my bicep. I was wearing a similar tank top to hers, but with warmer, full length pajama pants. Jenna always refused to admit when she was feeling cold, which was always, instead choosing to intertwine her legs with mine, absorbing any body heat radiating off of me.

I closed my eyes and focused on her fingers fluttering over my arm, concentrating on the words she attempted to spell out. It was a phrase so familiar to us at this point I had figured it out before she had even gotten to the last word.

I smiled down at her, watching as she moved her gaze from her writing to my face, a wide grin and blush present on her features.

"I love you," I whispered to her, admiring at the way her cheeks flushed deeper at my statement. She never used to be the type of person who got easily flustered or shied away from a challenge, but when it came down to the sweetest moments like this, her body was almost constantly some shade of red or pink.

Jenna wasn't the most openly affectionate person, she often got shy when it came to dates, romantic gesture, even verbally expressing her feelings. But by driving me around all the time when I didn't have my car or even my license, helping me with homework last minute, doing my hair for games, cooking and baking food for me, and remembering the smallest details about me, she showed me how much she loved me, and that was always enough for me.

"I love you too," she whispered back, resting her chin on my chest as she continued to gaze up at me, deep adoration present in her eyes, and without a doubt, I was sure I was looking back at her with either the same or deeper level of infatuation. I moved my hand around her waist to draw small circles on the sliver of skin that was exposed, relishing in the sweet intimacy.

Moments like this were my favorite, relishing in the presence of one of my favorite people on earth, quiet and at peace with no distractions, just the two of us enjoying our time spent together.

"Wait I wanna switch, it's your turn to be the big spoon," I patted her waist to guide her to flip over onto her back, so I could lay my head down on her this time.

One of the things I loved to do with Jenna was listen to her heartbeat, it was the beat of a song I would never know the name of, but it was my favorite. To me, it proved the tangibility of the connection between our souls, the love we held for each other. It was listening to the sound that kept my life force breathing, that allowed me to keep my rock and anchor, the person I loved the most and showed me that everyday was worth living, no matter what, because it was with her.

May 22nd, 2020 (End of Senior Year; 18 years old)

My heart sank at the silence I received from Paige, she was sitting across from me on my bed and kept switching from quietly scanning over the letter on my computer screen to changing the tabs, looking over all the schools I had received acceptance letters from.

Despite getting into UConn with Paige, and even universities close to her on the East Coast, like NYU and UPenn, I was choosing to commit to UCLA, my dream school since I was seven. It was safe to say Paige wasn't thrilled with my decision, evident through her lack of a response.

"P? Please say something, literally anything," I begged, her silence was unsettling, and her face was stoic and near emotionless, which meant I had no idea of the thoughts running through her head right now.

"I don't even know what you want me to say. Or expect me to do," she paused before continuing, "I am so proud of you and everything you've done and accomplished to make it this far, but I feel so," she stopped, collecting her thoughts and emotions before continuing.

"I almost want to hate you for choosing to go so far, for choosing to leave me and be so far away from me when we both know this kind of long-distance won't work," her voice cracked, at the end of her sentence. Rather than continuing to talk, she raised the collar of her t-shirt to her eyes, tucking her head under to hide the tears that had begun to spill out.

You moved your laptop away so could close some of the distance between the two of you. You gently cupped her face, coaxing her to let go of her t-shirt so you could look directly in her eyes.

"I know, and I'm so sorry, but I can't not go Paige. I need to do this for myself and I know that if I don't go, or at least give it my best shot, I'll regret it for the rest of my life," her heartbroken expression was painful for you to watch, only making it harder for you to refrain from crying.

"If I asked you to even consider, not even coming to UConn with me but like, NYU or something, literally anywhere closer to make the long distance work, would you?" Her eyes bore into yours, searching for the answer she dreaded hearing.

You waited a moment to answer, not to think over your answer or consider her question, you already knew the answer. But to compose yourself, holding in the pain you felt from hurting the only person who would ever love you like this.

You dropped your hands from her face before responding, "No."

You could see, practically hear, her heart shatter at your response, not expecting you to be so cold and short with her. She was openly crying now, her voice now shaky and slightly higher-pitched.

"So all the times that you told me that you couldn't imagine living without me, that you needed me, that you felt like you could only breathe around me, that was all bullshit? Or you just, what, changed your mind?"

"I never lied to you about that Paige, all of those things are still true. But this is my dream, I obviously didn't go into this whole process expecting to get into one of the top universities in the nation. If I asked you the same thing right now, to give up UConn and accept one of the recruitment offers you got closer to UCLA, would you?"

"Don't turn this around on me and make me the selfish one right now. That's not fair and you know it Jenna. Getting recruited is different, it determines whether or not I can go pro in the future, it makes all the difference in the world when it comes time for me to get drafted in the W."

"I'm not trying to accuse you of anything Paige, I'm just trying to make you understand that I can't give up UCLA. And selfish, really? Trying to make a life for myself, going to the college of my dreams, that's selfish?"

"That's not what I meant," she sighed, rubbing her hands over her tear-streaked face.

"You have to understand what it feels like to be in my position right now. You're my everything, my best friend, my girlfriend, the one person who knows me better than anyone, even my parents. And you just dropped a bomb of information on me. From day one, I have always been clear about where I wanted to go to college, and I signed as soon as I got the offer. But you never said anything about that, and on top of it, you were always the one who talked about our future together, and now it's like you're taking all of your previous statement back."

"I'm sorry Paige. I'm so sorry that I'm doing this to you, that I'm hurting you. That was never my intention with this. You're my everything too, but that's not right and that's not how it should be. One person can't be my whole life, and I can't be yours either. No matter how much I love you and need you, I also need this for myself."

Paige's eyes were bloodshot at this point, and you hadn't noticed when, but somewhere during your conversation you had given up on trying to hold back your own tears.

"I've already submitted a housing application, the apartments open from June but usually students don't go until July or August, so I'll still be here for a little while," you sniffled.

As much as your decision hurt Paige, you knew it was the right thing for both of you. Paige had to focus on basketball and you needed to focus on school and your own future, and maybe the time apart would allow you to grow together rather than apart.

After all, isn't distance supposed to make the heart grow fonder?

a/n: thank you for reading all the way through, any and all support is greatly appreciated!!

[nwjws]

who the hell is ni-ki ?! - TWENTY

; SYNOPSIS - school sucks. especially when everyone’s avoiding you like the plague - all because you’re the principal’s daughter. so it comes as a surprise when a strip of paper falls out of your locker one day, with a corny pick up line written on it. now you only have one question on your mind: who the hell is nishimura riki?

TWENTY ...if you don't like it, you can return it 💋 (1.5k words)

once you had realised your feelings for your best friend, all sense seemed to have left you. now, you were an awkward mess around him, always either too close or too far.

through relentless begging, your friends had agreed to accompany you on your hangout with riki as a part of the plan, but made you promise to ask The Question on your own.

the plan was simple:

- get riki to the beach at sun set at 6pm - y/n confesses her feelings (script attached) at 6:10 - have fireworks at exactly 6:18, right at the end of y/n's prepared speech (minji and jungwon in charge of this) - she asks "will you be my boyfriend?" - riki says yes and they get together!

the hangout itself wasn't much different from previous ones between you two (you liked to think of them as dates, but riki didn't have to know that). usually, you two just did whatever, having fun until the sun set, when he'd then walk you home.

the day took a sharp turn however, when you had all been skating at the local skatepark.

you'd been going down a ramp, when riki crossed by on his own skateboard, causing you to roll right into him. as a result, you two had crashed, with him landing on the low-raised platform in the middle. he groaned as his head hit the concrete with a resounding thud, arms wrapped around you to protect you from the fall.

"riki!" you gasped as jay, danielle, and hanni rushed to his side. "oh my god, are you okay?"

"no, i'm riki," he jokes, to which you slap him at.

"not funny."

"that was a really hard hit," jay frowns, helping the boy sit up.

riki winces and grips his forehead. you and the others ask how he feels, but he can't seem to focus or hear you clearly. your panicked heartbeat pounds in your ears, afraid of how badly you hurt him.

jay fished his phone out of his pocket and shone the flashlight around the younger's eyes.

"his pupils have a slow response to the light, he might have a concussion," he concludes. you feel dread run down your spine, blood chilling.

"we have to bring him to the hospital," danielle says so fast you almost don't catch what she says.

hanni and jay help him onto his feet, and you open the door to jay's car, and the five of you rush to the hospital.

you stare out the window, trying to calm your breathing as you wait for riki to wake up.

he'd fallen asleep on the ride, and you prayed that he would wake up faster. you weren't even sure he would at first, but the doctor assured you all that he'd only sustained minor injuries; there was nothing to be worried about.

danielle and hanni had gone down to buy some snacks from the vending machine. you didn't want riki to wake up while you were gone, so you opted to stay.

"he's fine, you know."

you hummed in acknowledgement that you'd heard what jay said, but you don't think you'll really relax until he wakes up.

you should have been more careful, controlled the board away so you wouldn't crash into him. then, he wouldn't have ended up hitting his head, nor would he have found himself unconscious in a hospital.

jay seemed to realise you were overthinking, and put a hand on your shoulder. he bit his lip in uncertainty, not sure how to get you to calm down.

"it was me, you know." you turned to him, confusion lining your face.

"what was you?"

"i'd been the one discouraging his friendship with you. well- mostly me," he confessed. "i was scared you'd turn him in or something, and your dad would expel him, and he'd have to retake the year at another school."

"oh. so it was you who planted those thoughts in his head," you stated lightheartedly with a raised eyebrow.

jay scratched the nape of his neck. "yeah... about that. i'm sorry, y/n. i was so focused on getting him to graduate despite all the things he's done. everyone's always talked about riki as this spectacle, and he's cried to us so many times about it. i guess i got protective over it, and didn't realise that maybe you really did just want to be his friend."

you smiled softly, grateful for his apology. you tried to show your forgiveness with a hug.

"it's alright. he talked to me about it a few times, but i always reassured him. he hasn't brought it up in a while, so i figured he finally got it through his head."

"i hope so."

when you heard the ruffling of sheets, you two quickly turned to your friend, slowly waking up.

"you're okay!" you cried, hugging him tightly.

"ow- yep," he chuckled, patting you on the back. you realised you were hurting him and let go, but he kept a hold on you and rested his chin on your shoulder.

"i'm so sorry," you whispered. "i'm so sorry, i'm so sorry, i'm so so sorry."

"it's alright. don't worry," he laughed. "this isn't the worst thing that's happened to me."

"i don't want to know."

"i'm glad you're okay," jay sighed in relief, and that's when you finally let go. "i'll go call the nurse."

once he left, you turned back to riki, and caught yourself in a staring contest.

your breath caught as his eyes rooted you on the spot. you couldn't look away; neither could he.

and then, you hit him on the arm.

"OW-"

"you idiot, don't scare me like that again!"

"i didn't choose to have a concussion!"

"you scared the shit out of me!"

"i didn't mean to!"

you trapped him in another embrace, almost sobbing into his hospital gown. you could hear him laugh, before wrapping his arms around you and pushing the hair out of your face.

"you totally ruined my plans for today," you teased.

"what plans?"

"i was planning on bringing you to the beach, where i'd tell you all about how much i like you. there was going to be-"

you suddenly stood back up, remembering the original plan of the day.

you grabbed your phone in a haste and checked the time.

6:15pm.

you forgot to tell jungwon and minji that you wouldn't be at the beach because you'd all been so worried over riki. they probably thought everything was still going as planned.

"y/n, what's going on?" riki pressed curiously.

just then, familiar exploding sounds were heard from outside, and you opened the window to see.

even from the view of the hospital building, you could see the fireworks fly into the air, a show for everyone to see. you hadn't realised how big the fireworks jay had gotten were.

you felt riki walk in close behind you, and you looked up to find him staring at the bright lights outside. although the beach was relatively war away, they were still pretty clear from here. the bright colours illuminated his face as he stared in awe, and you had to force yourself to look away.

"...does that say 'thank you, riki'??"

smiling sheepishly, you nodded. "umm, this was the plan that we had. i was supposed to get you to the beach at six and make it all seem natural. and then i had a confessional speech i was going to say - it was all scripted and everything!" you laughed embarrassedly, looking at the floor. "and then, the fireworks were supposed to play at the end of my speech, and i was going to ask-"

he cut you off as his lips crashed down on yours.

you were stunned for a moment, before kissing him back, feeling him sigh into the kiss in relief. this was your first kiss, and it was with the boy you loved so bad. giddiness tickled your stomach, and you prayed that this wouldn't be the last.

when you two parted, riki couldn't keep his smile down, eyes tracing your features.

"i love you," he whispered, barely audible.

"i love you too," you whispered back, afraid that any loud noise would shatter the moment. "will you be my boyfriend?"

"yes!" he giggled, embracing you again and jumping you two around in circles.

but then he paused, and created space between you two. "wait, no."

your jaw dropped. "no?"

"no, i don't want to be your boyfriend - just yet."

"what do you mean?" you pouted.

"we should get together on my birthday," he wore a cheshire smile on his face. "so our anniversaries could be on my birthday. the best day ever."

"but your birthday's in five days," you whined.

"you can wait five days, right?"

"what if i want more kisses?"

"i'll give you as many as you want, but i want to start using labels on my birthday."

"you're so childish," you rolled your eyes. "so what are we for now? just friends who kiss?"

"i do not want to be just friends," he shook his head. "but i definitely want more of this," riki said, pulling you in for another kiss.

"i guess i'll give you some more..."

"i love you, not-friend."

"just shut up and kiss me, not-boyfriend."

— NINETEEN ; MASTERLIST ; EPILOGUE

; AUTHOR'S CORNER ! pretend this is before his birthday 😇 you can tell i wrote this on the spot, no proofreading, not really in the right mood for the scenes but wtv... i love the more than friends less than lovers trope and while this isn't exactly that im practicing for when i do write it also omg i've been neglecting my blog im so sorry yawl its bc ive been preoccupied (read: obsessing over tbosas and pjo)

; TAGLIST - @riziwon @gweoriz @yenqa @miyseung @beomgyusonlywife @luvlee1313 @wildflowermooon @pookikisses @j-wyoung @n0t-kc @chiiiiiiiiis @ghostiiess @mrchweeee @jjongshrts @luvistqrzzz @lilriswife4life @aikoluvssyouu @cholexc @bahngchatsfx @teddywonss @woniewonn @artstaeh @thesassy-mia @moaqong @itsactuallylina @armydrcamers @mowagyu @yumilovesloona @ibsysbsfsunsbs @ashy1um @ahnneyong @jakelux @jaeminri @certified-niki-lover @ririlovesrenjun @sloobydooburmomjungwon @kyanmeai @lazy-miya @bbybearcubbs @hwasfavgf @girlhees @seungified @softieluvsyou @flwoie @y0iy0i @microwvdstrawb3rri3s send an ask or comment on the masterlist to be added .

[holdmeclosebutdontloveme]

CW: Mentions of previous experience with miscarriage.

The sun setting down to the sea, leaving a palette of orange and purple in the sky. The waves move freely, its water cool against his skin with a breeze that compliments it well. Such scenery have been constant in his life for a few years now and yet he is always grateful each time his attention moves away from his kitchen, in a daze of the nature sitting close to his home.

Unbothered by the fast-paced changes of the city life, Nanami have finally settled at a town far away - with you.

You had pushed him to quit his job, albeit unaware of the direct influence you had over his decision. But the stresses of the corporate world have left him mentally and physically unwell; leaving him on a brink of self-harm through alcohol and continuous overtime to push forward an agenda he is barely rewarded for.

Nanami feels guilty for the sympathy you always cuddle him with. Even if you offered it, willingly, pouring out the love you have for him through words and actions.

Now, the two of you have finally pursued the dream he had only imagined. A cafe near the sea, a concept Nanami never thought to be feasible but locals and tourists alike flock in for the baked goods he makes in the kitchen and enjoys the beverage you always have a knack for.

Even Satoru visits a few times in a week, buying more than he could eat just to pack it up for his students.

It's a blissful life with its own ups and downs but, regardless, Nanami readily faces everything.

Despite it all, he was unprepared for this.

You have been at the beach these days, especially when the cafe is quiet and knows that Nanami can easily handle both the kitchen and cash register alone. He doesn't mind the extra workload, aware of the time you need to process the tragedy you have faced while he was away that day.

And as he closes the cafe earlier than its initial closing time, a habit that slowly becomes a routine, he sees you on the shore.

You have changed from your usual work get-up, opting for the comfort of shorts and t-shirt. Nanami also notices you were barefoot, leading what little waves that ends up on the beach to greet the soles of your feet. The breeze have swept away your hair, tucking a few strands on the back of your ear with a solemn expression, all the while you faced the sunset.

The purple hue darkens the corners of your face as the little yellow strokes glisten the unshed tears in your eyes, even your wedding ring was shining brightly. Silence was what greeted him as he stood next to you, mimicking the words he couldn't say and gulps it all down to burn in the acid of his stomach, feeding him until hunger arrives once more for dinner.

Unfortunately, his appetite have diminished to nothing these days. Not even his favorite bread could heal a wounded heart. Not when yours have closed off entirely.

However, the persistence of a habit have left you to caress the tiny swell of your belly. A reminder of what had been there - the future, a life.

His daughter who he dreams of every night, listening to her laughter as her feet felt the waves for the first time. Her dress wet by the splatters of seawater done by you and a cheeky smile he gave to reprimand your behavior.

Sometimes she would've look like you, other times his daughter was his own image as a child. But regardless of the features she'll inherit, she was beautiful.

Most especially, she was his and yours entirely, molded by a love so big it couldn't be contained inside his heart. Yet she left before was done being baked in your belly.

"To somewhere better," you had said to him, while tears streamed down to your chin, trying to keep up a smile just to cheer him up. Even if you were the one being admitted in the hospital, tied with an IV fluid and monitored heavily by doctors and nurses.

You were alone when it happened and alone once more while you have undergone surgery to remove your little girl from her home within you. A tiny thing, intangible and bloody in form, but you describe him of the love you felt as you saw her out of you for the first time.

You couldn't hold her but the nurses have put her in a blanket near you. Before she was taken away for good.

Nanami...

If Nanami had been there, he doesn't know what he would've done. The possibilities were endless but the overall reaction he has for himself was an indescribable anger towards his absences, all caused by inconveniences conveniently placed at the wrong time at the wrong place.

He deserves the judgement from the nurses placed on him, their whispers and scowls of being a horrible husband who had left his wife to mourn for their baby by themselves.

It echoes in his head, in times where he was alone at the cafe or at home where sleeplessness eats his time away. Always looking at you, in a daze and in pain.

Just like how he is right now with his tears rolling down to his shirt with an opened mouth that fails to utter a word.

Unworthy of the hand that hold his tight.

[sawtastic-sideblog]

Specs x Reader Gender Neutral Reader TW: violence, blood, mentions of death and school shooters, there may be more I have forgotten to mention so just a general proceed with caution.

"I'm looking for Sebastian Parker. Sebastian are you with us?" The psychic, Elise, calls to the room. You roll your eyes, not so subtly, and catch the eye of the bearded camera man, Tucker. He shakes his head and looks back at his screen as he continues to walk around the group of six gathered in a circle in your dining room.

Your older brother, Sebastian, died two years ago and your mom, Alice, hasn't been the same since. None of you have, but your mom seemed to be taking it the hardest. Sebastian was thirteen years older than you and from a previous relationship your mom had. Your dad, Patrick, always said Sebastian was his son. They were close. The year Sebastian turned eighteen, he went to your dad and asked him to be adopted. Your dad agreed, enthusiastically and cried hugging Sebastian and just repeating 'my son' over and over again. The night Sebastian died, your dad stood in his hospital room, stroking his head, repeating those words over and over again.

Your little sister, Olivia, sat across from you. She and Sebastian also had a good relationship. With a twenty one year gap between the two, Livvy and Sebastian were the closest. You alway envied their relationship. Sebastian was smart and loved to help Livvy with her homework. He was an English teacher at the local high school. Livvy would visit him in his class and would help him with presentations and fun stuff he'd do with his classes. You would help with costumes and behind the scenes stuff. Livvy and Sebastian belonged on stage together. Since his death, Livvy hasn't been as involved with the school's theater program, but still auditions and does the plays. "For Sebby," she says.

You and Sebastian were close, but only after he moved out. When you were born, he was a stubborn teenager who didn't want the attention of his mother and the only stable father figure he'd ever known taken away from him. He didn't want his weekends taken by some brat he'd have to watch, which was seldom if at all. After he moved out, you got sick with pneumonia and almost died in the hospital. He realized how much he cared for you and drove eighteen hours back from college to be with you. He transferred closer to be with the family and would let you stay at his apartment when your mom had bad days. Her pregnancy with Olivia was not an easy one. You and Sebastian grew close and went to all thr new movies, sport games, and community events together and with his friends. You were even the flower girl at Sebastian's best friend's wedding when you were twelve.

Your mom has Sebastian at fifteen and was a single mom until she met your dad. She struggled to get by and from a young age, Sebastian realized that they didn't have much and he would do odd jobs for people of the community. When your dad came to town, wanting a fresh start away from toxic parents and a crazy ex, Sebastian askedif he needed ay help with boxes "for a price." Your dad agreed and later met your mom. Your dad would always ask Sebastian to "help" with leaky faucets, painting walls, and working on cars. His job was to sit and make sure your dad was doing everything safely. Eventually your parents started dating and got married two years later. Your dad helped put her through nursing school and she has loved every second of her job. After being a single mom and her child, relying on each other, and practically growing up together, your mom and Sebastian were best friends. Losing him broke her. She stayed in bed for months. One day she was back to her normal self, making pancakes for everyone.

"What's this, honey? It's after ten at night?" Your dad asked, putting his keys in thr bowl by the door as you and Livvy put your coats on h hooks.

"Is it? Oh, well, I've been so busy. I guess I lost track of time," she replied with a smile on her face.

"What have you been doing?"

"I cleaned the whole house. Where have you been?"

"Work, school, dinner, and Livvy's play. Why are you cleaning the whole house? We did that this past weekend."

"Sebastian's coming home."

With that statement, all three hearts broke.

"Hey mom, it's late, let's get you to bed," you say and try to lead your mom to her room. After a little resistance you an your father manager to get your mom into bed. After that your mom kept insisting Sebastian would be coming home and recently she's started trying to contact him. Weird things started happening andit scared Olivia to the point she was always over at your apartment.

Last week, your dad woke up with scratches down his back. You immediately started looking for help and tracked down Elise. You arranged to meet at your parent's house tonight and Elise decided a seance would be the best course of action. You, being a skeptic, scoffed at her.

"There's no such things as ghosts."

"Ghosts, spirits, demons, they all exist, (Y/N), and we're the ones who are going to help you rid yourselves of them."

"No offense, Elise, but this is crazy."

"Sometimes crazy works."

So, now, you're in the dining room of your childhood home, having a seance to contact your dead brother. Still convinced that this is crazy, you look around the circle. You can't read your dad's face, but your mom has a look of hope, Livvy looks scared, Elise has a look of intense concentration, and her assistant, Spec, is writing at lightning speed as Elie speaks.

"Sebatian Parker. Follow the sound of my voice."

You scoff and try to coverit with a cough, but Tucker and Specs both give you looks. You put your gaze forward and close your eyes just as something grabs your chair and pulls it backwards. You let out a startled scream. You're lifted off the ground and feel your throat burn as if someone is choking you, but there is nobody there. You cough, gag, and sputter as Livvy watches in frozen horror, your mom stands with her hands over her mouth.

"Patrick, do something," she calls as she grips Livvy's arm tight. He leaps into action and tries to pull you off the wall. He's thrown across the room into Tucker and they both go down. Specs leaps from his seat and starts to rush toward you, but is thrown back into the China cabinet. The glass shatters and rains down around Spec's limp body. You try to scream, but nothing comes out.

Tucker sits up slowly. Once he's checked back into what's happening, he grabs his camera and springs to his feet, pointing the camera around the room.

"I command you to leave this family alone!"

You fall to the floor and take in a big gulp of air. Elise and her entire chair are tipped backwards and an invisible force starts to choke her. You mother and sister scream in terror and run to the corner and huddle together. Your dad sits up and watches, beary eyes and confused. You realize the danger Elise is in, so you run to the kitchen for salt and then the living room for an iron fire poking stick.

Hoping for the best, you swing the stick above Elise and she takes in a breath. You make a big circle out of the salt.

"Everyone in the ring! Don't mess it up!" You shout. Everyone does as they're told, except for Specs, who is still out.

"Steven! Steven, please, wake up!" Elise pleads. Specs' limp, bloody, body is dragged across the floor, up the wall, and is pinned to the ceiling. You all start shouting for him to wake up. He does and immediately starts to panic. He's thrown against the far wall and falls to the floor.

With every ounce of courage you have, you jump the salt line and swing the poking stick wildly as you run to Specs. You try to help him up, but you can't swing and lift at the same time. Luckily, Tucker followed you and lifts his friend up and over his shoulder. The three of you make your way back to the circle where Tucker sets Specs down. The China cabinet shakes and the broken glass rattles.

"Leave them alone!" Elise yells. A chair raises behind Elise. It charged forward and you shove her out of the way just in time for it to hit you in the face.

You open your eyes and it's the dining room, but darker. You look around and see misty figures. It's your parents, sister, Elise, and her two assistants.

"(Y/N)!" A voice calls, far in the distance. You stand up and walk through the house. The voice continues to call for you. You climb the stairs and walk to Sebastian's room. You open the door to be met with a lady in a black wedding dress. Her hands reach for your throat, but something shoves her aside. Sebastian stands in her place and grabs your hand. Together, you two run down the stairs and out of the house.

"The garage," you say as the two of you reach the lawn. The lady in black appears in the doorway of the house. Sebastian looks for the spare key and fumbles it into the lock.

"What now?" Sebastian asks as he locks the door behind him.

"Remember when I was a kid and you were in college you showed me how to make a flame thrower?"

"With the aerosol spray can and a lighter? Yeah, but what are you going to do?"

"Burn her," you say with determination as you grab cans of spray paint off a shelf. Sebastian grabs the lighters from a drawer and tosses you one. Sebatian unlocks the door as you hide. As the lady enters, Sebastian sends flames in her direction. She tries to back up, but you step out of your hiding spot and spark up your makeshift flamethrower. She vanishes and you both put out your flames. You look at each other and laugh. Sebastian holds his arms out for a hug, which you gladly accept.

"We miss you, you know?"

"I know. I've been watching. Mom kept talking to me. I heard her, but the lady in black wouldn't let me communicate."

"Well, now you can."

"No, Cesario, I don't think I can."

You smile almost melancholic at the nickname. You read Twelfth Night when you were in your first semester of college and hated it. You can't understand Shakespeare to save your life. You decided to watch it instead and you developed a crush on Johnny Young, the guy that was playing Viola/Cesario in the production. Since then, Sebastian has called you Cesario as a joke. You miss that.

Elise smiles warmly as you come into view, holding Sebastian close to your side. You look down to where your father is holding your head in his lap, your mom is crying into your chest, and your sister is staring at you, fear etched on her delicate features.

"Hello, Sebastian. (Y/N)," Elise greets. Everyone looks to the direction Elise is looking.

"Where are we?" You ask.

"I call it The Further."

"Is it the afterlife?"

"Something like that, I suppose. I know seeing your brother again has been good for you, but you need to get back into your body," Elise says. You nod in understanding as dark figures shift in the shadows. You turn towards Sebastian and grab his hands.

"I love you, Seb. I miss you every single day. Nothing will ever change that. I wish I was there to stop the shooter from getting to you, but you were a hero. All the kids were fine. Physically anyway. Emotionally they're all traumatized," you say, tears cascading down your cheeks. Sebastian chuckles at your last statement and wipes the tears away.

"I'm glad they're relatively okay. I love you, too. Make sure mom, dad, and Liv know I love them as well?" Sebastian asks. You nod and give him one last hug before walking to your body. There's a flash of light that engulfs you.

Your eyes flutter open to see your family hovering over you. You sit up an hug your mom.

"He loves you guys," you say into your mom's shoulder. "He saved me too. He pushed the woman in black away and he taught me how to make a flamethrower."

"You did that when you were little. You burned down my rose bush," your dad says through his tears.

"We used them on the lady in black."

"Makes sense to me," Olivia says hugging you.

"My son," your dad whispers as his arms wrap around you.

A little while later, you walk into th bathroom to find a shirtless Specs picking glass from his back. Ot at last attempting to.

"Need some help?" You ask. The man jumps and turns to you. He sheepishly nods ans his cheeks turn red. You take the tweezers from him and start pulling small glass shards from his back. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," he says with a laugh, "I've had worse. Actually, no, not really, this is probably the worst."

"Well, a ghost threw you into a China cabinet, so I'm not surprised."

"Still a skeptic?"

"No, but I know not to mess with that stuff."

"Smart cookie, you are. Ow."

"Sorry," you say before chuckling. "I don't think I've ever hears a more pitiful 'ow' in my life."

"I don't see a point in screaming. It won't do any good."

"Could be quite pleasurable. Let me know I'm doing a good job," you joke. Specs turns around to face you.

"Is that an invitation, (Y/N)?" He asks quietly. He moves to your ear and whispers "because I may have to take you up on that."

Your breath catches for a moment before you make Specs turn back around. Your cheeks heat up as you start pulling glass from the taller man's shoulder blade.

"In your dreams."

"I can't wait."

You take the next twenty minutes or so to pull glass from his back. When you're certain you got it all, you leave Specs to clean up. Your mom provided towels and your father and sister ran down to the twenty four hour gas station to get bandages and pain killers. Tuck walks over with an ice pack wrapped in a towel and presses it gently to your head.

"He likes you. He's been talking about you since we met last week. He wanted to ask you on a date, but doesn't know how to ask. Or when to ask. Obviously, he couldn't during all of this mess," Tucker gestures vaguely around at the mess of shatter glass, a splintered chair, and blood.

"Well, he was right in that aspect," you say.

"You should've heard him the day we met," He says before pitching his voice up to mimic his friend. "Tuck, did you see (Y/N)? Do you think they'd say yes if I asked them out? They had th prettiest eyes I've-"

Tucker is cut off by the bathroom door opening and Specs walking out. Shock, hurt, and embarrassment on his. He opens his mouth to say something before shoving past you and Tucker.

"I think you messed up, there, buddy," you say as Tucker just nods and walks into the bathroom with the towels your mom gave him and his spare clothes.

"He'll get over it," he called as he closed the door. Feeling bad for Specs, you go to look for him and find him on the back porch steps. You grab a blanket from thr back of the couch and walk outside. You wrap the blanket around his shoulders. He flinched from the sudden coverage on his back.

"It's too cold for you to be out here shirtless and with wet hair."

"So?"

"So? So, you'll get sick and miss our date."

He turns his head so fast he almost gives himself whiplash. You give him a soft smile and he smiles back. His face turns serious as he looks back across the yard at the old swing and play fort. He stands and hold out his hand. You take it and you both walk across the yard. Specs climbs into the fort and turns back to you with a goofy smile. You follow him up and you both sit facing the house where you see your mom and Elise talking.

"How did your brother die?"

"Some kid decided that if he couldn't have his ex girlfriend, nobody could. She was in Sebastian's class and one of the other teachers warned him and told him who it was. His class hid the girl behind a bookshelf and when the kid tried to come in and found the door locked, he shot through the doorknob and walked in. Seb stood up for the class. He blocked the kid from them. The kid kept threatening him, but Seb held his ground. The police came in at about that time and it scared the kid and he pulled the trigger. He claimed it was an accident. He went in with thr intention to kill someone. There was no accident. Seb was rushed to the hospital and died three days later. He was a hero. At graduation that year, all the students gave my mom a single red rose. The ones in his class that day gave my mom these folders full of letters written from themselves, their friends, and their families. They gave us some good memories to look back on and kind words of support and encouragement. It was sweet."

Specs' thumb wipes a tear from your cheek. He pulls you into his side for a hug, which you gratefully accept and return. The sliding glass door opens.

"Hey, we got stuff for Specs," Livvy's voice carries through the night. Specs let's you go and turns to slide down the slide. You follow him again and you walk to the house. Specs takes a seat backwards in a chair. He winces as your mom takes the blanket off his shoulders, the fibers from the fluffy blanket sticking to the fluid oozing from the wounds.

"You okay?" You ask, concerned. Specs nods and rests his forehead on the back of the chair. Livvy pulls you to the side to start cleaning up. Tucker and your dad pick up thr cabinet as you sweep the glass and Livvy picks up the broken chair.

"Can't belive (Y/N) broke this with their head," Livvy laughs.

"Yeah, and they've got a pretty good bruise to show for it," your dad replies.

"It's not that bad is it?" You ask as you sweep the glass into the dustpan.

"Well, it's not great," Livvy says. You set the broom and dustpan aside and make your way to the bathroom. You're looking at your forehead when the door opens.

"We've got to stop meeting like this," Specs jokes. You smile as you make eye contact in the mirror.

"You alright?"

"Are you? You have a bruise on your head. You should be checked for a concussion," he says. You turn toward him and he grabs both sides of your head. He places a gentle kiss on your forehead.

"I like your shirt," you say, pulling at his Star Wars t-shirt.

"Star Wars fan?"

"Nope. Never seen a single movie."

"Okay, well, that's what we will be doing for our date."

"Watching Star Wars?"

"Yes."

"Okay."

Specs leans closer to you and you loom up at him. Your eyes flutter closed. You can feel his breath fan over your face. A knock sounds at the door, breaking you two apart.

"(Y/N), you in there?" Your mom's voice calls. "I want to look at your head, darling."

"Yeah, mom. I'm in here," you answer. You barely open the door and slip through. Your mom checks you over and you agree to go to the hospital.

You and your dad walk out with Elise, Tucker, and Specs. You manage to pull Specs behind a tree as your dad and Elise talk and Tucker loads the van.

"Give me your phone," you say, holding out your hand. He does so and you put your number in. You two talk a few more minutes.

"Specs, let's go," Tucker yells at the tree. You bid him goodbye and he starts to walk away. You and your father walk to the car. Before Tucker can drive away the side door of the van opens. Specs jogs across the yard to you, spins you around, and crashes his lips into yours. You kiss him back just as he pulls away.

"See you Saturday," he smiles and pecks your lips one more time before running back to the van. You watch the van drive down the street as the sun begins to rise.

"Got yourself a boyfriend, huh, (Y/N)," your dad teases.

"Shut up," you say as you get into the car.

[thatonelesbianfander]

All Stay Strong: The Transcript Files Chapter 2: 1966-1974

Fandom// Sanders Sides and Five Nights at Freddy’s

TW// Yelling, Swearing, Child birth mention, Homophobia, Ableism, Abuse, Arguing

Word count// 5573

Description// All Stay Strong is a Sanders Sides and Five Nights at Freddy’s combined lore AU. This chapter takes place in the years 1966-1974. During these years, you will see the origins of Henry and Sophia’s life together, the start of Michael Afton’s life, different events from the beginning of Remus and Roman’s lives, the origins of FredBear’s Family Diner, as well as some other major events.

Major Characters// William Afton, Clara Afton/Mrs. Afton, Henry Emily, Remus Sanders, Roman Sanders, Janus Sanders, Michael Afton

Pairings// William x Mrs. Afton, oc x oc

AUs// All Stay Strong AU (more about AU here)

Masterpost // Previous // Next

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File 1AE4161966- Emily Wedding

The date is April 16, 1966. It is the day of the wedding between Henry Emily and Sophia Fosterson. Henry Emily was the son of an adoptive above average income British American family who adopted him after his birth parents divorced and abandoned him. Henry was born in Utah in the year 1938. Henry was the middle child of his family, having a younger adoptive sister named Jessie, and an older adoptive brother, William. Henry used to co-run his father’s milling company along with his siblings and father before it went out of business. Currently, he worked for a small woodworking company, making wooden props. Sophia on the other hand was the daughter of a wealthy American family. Sophia was born in Utah in the year 1939. She was the only child of her family. Sophia worked as a nurse in the local hospital. The two met at a nearby bar a few years before William and Clara’s marriage and started dating a few months before. Now, after 5 years of dating, and a year of planning, they were finally getting married.

Henry sat in his chair as William did his hair.

”How can you stay so calm about this? I would never be able to stay this calm!” William said.

”That’s because I’m not a fucking anxious bitch like you,” Henry said. William hit the back of Henry’s head with the back of the brush playfully.

”Ow!” Henry said, rubbing the back of his head.

”Deserved,” William said.

”Shut up,” Henry replied. William finished Henry’s hair, Henry looking at himself in the mirror.

”Wow, you’re actually pretty good at styling hair. Should use some of that talent for your own,” Henry said, fixing up the sides a little.

”Excuse you, I think my hair’s perfect,” William said, fixing his ponytail.

”Yeah, yeah, whatever you say,” Henry said.

”I can hit you with the brush again if you’d like,” William said.

”Please don’t,” Henry said. William helped Henry fix his bowtie before the two sat down.

”So, how have the twins been doing?” Henry asked, picking up his book.

”Pretty good, they’ve both taken their first steps and Roman has started speaking a little. Remus hasn’t started speaking yet, though, but other than that they’re great!” William said.

”That’s good. How about your job? How’s that been treating you?” Henry asked.

”It’s actually pretty great! I love being able to make a bunch of different machines and stuff! I’ve been working on this one new technology so I can make robotic suits, but it’s only in its starting phase, it’s nowhere near finished,” William replied.

”That’s cool,” Henry said.

”Yeah, life’s been good. Roman and Remus seem to be really close, they’re basically inseparable. Once, we had to take the twins in for checkups, and Roman had to go into a different room than Remus and Remus wouldn’t stop crying until Roman came out,” William said.

”I bet that was fun,” Henry said.

”Yeah, right,” William responded. The two continued to talk until they had to head over to the church.

Over with the girls, Jess did Sophia’s hair as Clara and Jess’s “friend”, Dawn, sat next to her.

”So, are you excited?” Clara asked.

”Yeah. Kind of nervous, but excited at the same time,” Sophia said.

”Don’t worry, you’ll do great!” Dawn responded.

”Thanks,” Sophia said. Jess finished Sophia’s hair, handing her a mirror so she could look at herself.

”Wow, you’re really good at this,” Sophia said.

”I mean… I studied fashion for 4 years. Would kind of be a waste if I wasn’t,” Jess said.

”True,” Sophia said.

”So, Clara. How have the twins been?” Jess asked.

”I mean… You just met them a few months ago, but they’re been good,” Clara said.

”You have kids?” Dawn asked.

”Yeah, didn’t Jess ever tell you?” Clara asked.

”No,” Dawn replied.

”Shit, that’s what I was forgetting!” Jess said.

”It’s okay. What are their names?” Dawn asked.

”Remus and Roman. Roman is the shortened version of Romulus and Remus is named after Romulus’ brother,” Clara said.

”Roman mythology?” Dawn asked.

”Yeah. I was really into it last year when the twins were born,” Clara said.

”That’s pretty cool,” Dawn said. The four soon heard knocking on the door, turning to the door.

”Come in!” Sophia shouted. Ashley, opened the door, smiling.

”Hey, you four! I just wanted to let you know that there’s about 15 minutes until you’re needed at the church,” Ashley said.

”Okay, thanks, Mom!” Jess said. Ashley nodded, closing the door and walking off.

”Welp, let’s get you into your dress and get you to your future husband,” Jess said. Sophia nodded, standing up and walking to the other side of the room with Jess. Jess helped Sophia into her dress, fixing it up and adding a few last minute details before the four exited the room and walked over to the church.

After the wedding, everyone went over to the reception area. Everyone ate the meal while talking.

”So, yeah. That’s basically the story of how we met,” Clara said.

”Wow, that’s really cool!” Dawn replied.

”Yeah,” William said.

”Well, I need to use the bathroom real quick. Do any of you know where it is?” Dawn asked.

”Oh, I do! I’ll take you to it!” Jess said. Dawn nodded, the two getting up and going to the bathroom as William and Clara continued to talk. Once the two arrived in the bathroom, Jess closed the door, walking over to Dawn.

”Are you okay, love? You’ve been really quiet tonight,” Jess asked.

”Yeah, I’m fine. I was just thinking…” Dawn said.

”About what?” Jess asked.

”Well, I just think it’s unfair how both your brothers get to marry the love of their lives while we have to stay hidden…” Dawn said.

”I know… But I promise you… If and when we can marry, I’ll make sure that is the first thing we do, alright?” Jess said. Dawn smiled, turning around and facing Jess.

”Thanks. I love you,” Dawn said. Jess smiled, putting a hand to Dawn’s face.

”Kisses?” Jess asked. Dawn nodded, smiling.

”Where are they… They’ve been gone for a while now…” William said, looking around. The meal had ended and everyone was gathered around Henry and Sophia’s table, waiting for Dawn and Jess to get back so they could start presents.

”I don’t know… Should we look for them?” Henry asked.

”Probably… What if something happened?” Sophia replied. Henry and Sophia got up and headed to the bathrooms, the reception guests following behind. William and Henry walked next to each other before stopping in front of the door to the handicapped bathrooms. William opened the door, freezing at the sight. In front of them, Jess and Dawn stood, both kissing each other, unaware of their audience.

”What the fuck?!” Henry yelled. Dawn and Jess looked up, freezing as they realized they were caught.

”William… Henry… I can explain!” Jess said, nervously.

”You fucking freak! You’re fucking disgusting!” William yelled, tears coming to Jess’s eyes.

”Hey, leave her alone!” Dawn defended Jess.

”You shut up! Stay out of this!” William yelled back.

”Will… Hen… Please…” Jess said, starting to cry.

”Don’t call us that! You’re a fucking disappointment! I wish you were never my sister! Get the fuck out of here!” Henry yelled.

”Fine! It’s not like I fucking need you two hateful bigots in my life anyway!” Jess yelled back, grabbing Dawn’s hand and their stuff before storming out of the reception.

”Henry, William… You really didn’t have to be that harsh on her… She’s just confused!” Ashley said, putting a hand on Henry’s shoulder.

”Whatever,” Henry said, looking away from his mother.

Henry and Sophia sat in bed in their apartment after the reception, Sophia reading a book as Henry zoned out.

”Was I really too harsh on her, Soph?” Henry asked.

”Not at all. I think you had the right reaction. She’s a sinner and a traitor to God. You did everything you needed to do,” Sophia replied.

”I know… But… She’s still my sister… I can’t help but feel a little guilty,” Henry said.

”Well, that is fair, but she decided to stray from God, so she should have expected this,” Sophia responded. Henry sighed, looking down.

”Okay… I’m going to go to sleep… I love you,” Henry said.

”Love you too, Hen,” Sophia replied, smiling. The two shared a quick kiss before Henry laid down and fell asleep, Sophia following suit a few minutes later.

File 1E4201966- Emily Moving Day

The date is April 20, 1966. Henry packed the last of his bags into his car, getting in. Sophia looked up from her book, smiling.

”Hey, Hen. Got everything?” Sophia asked.

”Yup, let’s go,” Henry said, starting the car and driving off. The drive wasn’t that long, only taking about 15 minutes until the two were at their new house. The two got out of their car, grabbing their bags and walking up to the house. Henry grabbed the house key, unlocking the door and opening it. Sophia stepped inside first, followed by Henry shortly after once he locked the car. The two looked around at their house, all of their furniture and stuff having been moved in the previous day.

”Welp, let’s get to unpacking everything,” Henry said, placing his bags down. Sophia nodded, placing her bags down as well before walking with Henry. The two started to unpack the boxes and organize the house, sharing a couple of drinks and laughs along the way.

”Oh, I’m so excited! We’re going to be able to have our own family together!” Sophia said, handing a glass to Henry.

”Yeah, it’s exciting!” Henry replied, putting the glass into the cabinet.

”So, you’re making the basement your work area still?” Sophia asked.

”Yeah, it’ll just be safer for all of that stuff to stay in the basement since it’s a bunch of sharp objects and heavy equipment,” Henry said.

”Okay. If you need any help with anything, you can ask me,” Sophia said.

”I know, Soph. Thanks,” Henry said. The two finished organizing the house, both now sitting on their bed.

”Ugh, I’m tired,” Sophia said.

”Take a nap. I can start dinner while you sleep,” Henry said.

”Are you sure?” Sophia asked.

”Yeah, go to sleep, I’ll get dinner started,” Henry said. Sophia smiled.

”Thanks,” Sophia said, laying down and falling asleep while Henry walked downstairs and started dinner. Sophia woke up and ate dinner with Henry an hour later. The two watched TV after eating, soon falling asleep on the couch together.

File 1AE6211967- Birth of Michael Afton

The date is June 21, 1967. William paced up and down the hallway as Henry and Sophia stood outside with him. Sophia held Remus as Roman stood next to her, holding onto the sleeve of her shirt.

”Why won’t you let me be with her during this?” William asked, still pacing.

”Because you’re going to freak out again like you did when these two were born,” Henry said, gesturing to Remus and Roman.

”Ughhhhhhh,” William said, leaning against the wall and sliding down it. Roman tugged on Sophia’s sleeve, Sophia looking down at him.

”Yes, Roman?” Sophia asked.

”Remus,” Roman said, holding his arms out to Remus.

”Do you want Remus?” Sophia asked. Roman nodded, making grabby hands towards his twin. Sophia smiled, setting Remus down. Remus walked over to Roman, hugging him as Roman hugged him back. Remus looked over to William, who sat next to Henry, his head in his hands. He walked over to William, pulling Roman along.

”Papa?” Remus asked, tapping William’s arm. William looked up, smiling a little and opening his arms out to Remus. Remus and Roman hugged William, William holding the two close.

”I love you two so much,” William said.

”Love you, Papa…” Remus replied.

”Remus’s speech has been getting better,” Henry said.

”Yeah. The speech therapist has been working wonders for us,” William said, holding his kids close. Sophia walked over to the four, sitting down next to Henry. William took a deep breath, leaning his head against the wall.

”Ugh, this takes too long! I want my wife!” William said.

”She’ll be done soon, don’t worry,” Henry said, putting a hand on William’s shoulder. A doctor peeked out into the hallway, looking around.

”Mr. Afton?” the doctor asked, confused.

”Down here,” William said. The doctor looked down, spotting the 5 sitting on the floor.

”Ah! There you are! Your wife’s ready if you would like to see her!” the doctor said.

”Okay, thanks,” William replied. Henry and Sophia got up, picking up Remus and Roman so William could stand up as well. Henry and Sophia put the twins down, William grabbing both of their hands.

”We’re going to head out. Tell Clara we said hi and hope she gets well soon,” Henry said, holding Sophia’s hand.

”I will,” William said. Henry and Sophia walked away as William turned to the twins.

”Come on, you two. We’re going to go see Mama,” William said. The twins smiled, walking with William into the room. The three walked over to the side of Clara’s bed, William grabbing Clara’s hand and holding it.

”Hey, love. How are you feeling?” William asked.

”Tired,” Clara said, looking over at him.

”Mama?” Roman asked, looking up at Clara. Clara looked down at Roman, smiling.

”Hey, Ro,” Clara said. The twins looked up at Clara, Clara smiling at them.

”Where’s baby?” Roman asked, looking around.

”He’ll be here in a minute,” William said, putting a hand on Roman’s shoulder. Right on time, the doctor came into the room, holding the newborn Afton child in his arms.

”Here’s your new son. Have you thought of a name yet?” the doctor asked, handing Clara her son.

”Michael!” William said.

”After Michael the Archangel?” Clara asked.

”Hey, you got to name the twins after one of your interests! It’s only fair I get to name our new son after one of mine,” William said.

”Your religion isn’t an interest,” Clara said, holding back laughter.

”Shush, I like it,” William said. ”Okay, well, I’ll leave you alone for now,” the doctor said, walking out of the room. The twins crawled onto the bed with Clara, looking at their new brother.

”So, what do you to think?” Clara asked. Roman extended a finger out to Michael, Michael grabbing onto it in his sleep. Roman smiled, looking to William.

”Papa, Papa, Mikey’s got my finger!” Roman said.

”I see,” William said, sitting on the edge of the bed.

”Hey, you two,” Clara said, the twins looking up to Clara.

”I need you to promise me that you’ll protect him, okay? Keep him safe,” Clara said. The two nodded, smiling.

”Okay, you two. Let’s let Mama get some rest, okay?” William said. The twins nodded, getting off the bed. Clara handed Michael to William, William putting Michael in his bed and walking out of the room so Clara could sleep.

File 1A641969- Remus gets Golden

The date is June 4, 1969. There was a knock at the Afton’s door. William answered the door, his mother, Ashley Afton, standing on the other side.

”Oh, mom! You’re here!” William said.

”Yeah! I got presents for the twins!” Ashley said, holding out some present bags.

”I’ll take the presents. Come on in!” William said, grabbing the presents from Ashley. Ashley walked in, greeting Clara who was holding Michael before sitting down on the couch. William placed the presents on a table with a bunch of others before also sitting down.

”Boys! Grandma’s here!” William called. Remus and Roman bolted down the stairs, running over to Ashley.

”Grandma!” Roman said, hugging Ashley. ”Hello, you two, and how are my favorite twins doing?” Ashley asked, hugging Roman.

”Good!” Remus said, bouncing up and down.

”So… 4 years old now, huh?” Ashley asked, looking down at Roman. The two nodded, smiling.

”You two are getting so big!” Ashley said.

”Yeah, the doctor said they were doing well when we went in for checkups yesterday,” William said.

”Can we do presents now?” Remus asked, looking up at William and Clara.

”Not yet, we have to wait for Uncle Henry and Aunt Sophia to get here!” Clara said.

”Okay!” Remus said. The twins sat on the floor, playing with their toys together as the other three talked.

About 30 minutes later, everyone gathered in the living room, Henry and Sophia having arrived a few minutes earlier. The twins sat on the floor, unwrapping their presents.

”Open that one next, Remus. That one’s from me,” Ashley said. Remus looked to the present that Ashley pointed to. It was a lumpy present that was wrapped in green paper. Remus picked the present up, squeezing it to find out it felt squishy. He tore the paper off, revealing a gold bear plushie. Remus’s eyes lit up as he turned the bear around, looking at it.

”Do you like it?” Ashley asked. Remus nodded, hugging the bear.

”What do we say?” Clara asked, putting a hand on Remus’s shoulder. Remus looked to Ashley, smiling.

”Thank you!” Remus said.

”You’re welcome,” Ashley replied, smiling. Remus looked at the bear in his hands, holding it close.

”What are you going to name it?” Ashley asked. Remus looked to Ashley before looking back down at the bear, thinking.

”Golden Bear!” Remus said. Remus hugged the bear, holding it close. The group continued with their festivities, talking and laughing with each other as a family.

File 1AE2151970- Afton Moving Day 2

The date is February 15, 1970. William and Clara packed up the car as the twins ran around in the yard with Michael. William closed the trunk of the car, one of Henry’s friends coming up to him and tapping him on the shoulder. William turned around, seeing Henry’s friend behind him.

”Hey, man. We got everything loaded into the trucks, we’re ready to go when you are,” Henry’s friend said.

”Alright! Thanks again for helping us with this,” William said.

”It’s no problem, we’re always glad to help,” Henry’s friend said. Henry’s friend walked off, getting into the moving truck. William turned to the kids running around in the yard, smiling.

”Okay, you three!” William called out, the three stopping dead in their tracks, “Got all your energy out?”

”Yeah!” Roman said.

”Well, then get in the car. We’re going,” William said. The three ran over to the car, climbing into the car. Remus and Roman sat in their car seats as Clara helped Michael into his. William got into the driver’s seat, starting the car. Clara got in the car, opening her book and starting to read as William pulled out of the driveway. The group drove for a while, the moving trucks following close behind as they drove to William and Clara’s new house. They soon pulled into the driveway of the new house, William parking the car. William and Clara got out of the car, Clara helping Mike out of the car as Remus and Roman got out as well. William smiled mischievously, starting to sneak down the sidewalk.

”What are you doing?” Clara asked.

”Going to say hi to the new neighbors,” William said. Clara face palmed as William snuck down to a house across the street. This house was a few houses down on the opposite side of the road. The sign on the house read “House of the Emily Family”. William rang the doorbell, hiding behind a bush before the owner of the house answered the door. Henry opened the door to his house, looking around.

”Hello?” Henry called, not seeing anyone. William jumped out from behind the bush, startling Henry.

”Surprise!” William said.

”Jesus Christ, William! What the fuck?!” Henry said, startled.

”Sorry, sorry, I had to!” William laughed.

”What are you even doing here?” Henry asked, looking around.

”Oh, Clara and I moved down the road to that house over there,” William said, pointing over to the house.

”Why?” Henry asked.

”It’s closer. That way we can work on our TV show more easily,” William said.

”Hm, alright. Do you need me and Sophia to help you move in?” Henry asked.

”Honestly, yeah. That would be helpful,” William said.

”Okay, we’ll be over in a minute,” Henry said. William nodded, walking back over to his house. William and Clara moved everything into the house with the help of the Emilys and Henry’s friends, eventually getting everything organized. The Aftons rested easy that evening, exhausted from the long day.

File 1AE5131970- Birth of Charlie and Sammy Emily

The date is May 13, 1970. Henry paced outside the hospital room, grabbing at his hair.

”Damn. I thought I was the anxious bitch of the family,” William said, leaning against the wall.

”Shut the fuck up, William. I brought you here for emotional support, not your usual bullshit,” Henry replied, gripping his hair tighter.

”Okay, okay, calm down. Sophia’s going to be okay, trust me,” William said, walking over to Henry. Henry took a deep breath, calming down a little.

”Okay… I’m good…” Henry said.

”Great. Now, let’s sit down and wait for them to finish up. You can tell me about the book you’re reading,” William said. Henry smiled, sitting down against the wall and starting to talk. A few moments later, a doctor came out of the room, looking around.

”Mr. Emily?” the doctor called. ”Here,” Henry said. The doctor looked down, smiling.

”Hello there! Your wife is ready for you when you’re ready!” the doctor said. Henry nodded, standing up as the doctor walked down the hallway.

”Well, I’m going to go now. I promised Clara and the kids a Disney movie night. I’ll see you later,” William said.

”Okay, see you later,” Henry said. William nodded, walking down the hallway. Henry entered the room, walking over to the bed where Sophia laid. He stood next to the bed, holding Sophia’s hand. Sophia smiled tiredly, looking up at Henry.

”Hey, love. I’m sorry about not being here, I didn’t expect to freak out like that,” Henry said.

”It’s okay, I don’t mind,” Sophia said. The doctor came into the room, holding the newborn Emily twins.

”Here are your newborn twins, Mr. and Mrs. Emily. Have you thought of names yet?” the doctor asked, handing Sophia her twins.

”Hmm… How about Charlotte for the girl, and Samuel for the boy?” Sophia said.

”I like it,” Henry said. ”Okay, then, I’ll leave you two alone,” the doctor said, walking out of the room. Henry sat on the edge of the bed, looking at his new children.

”Can you take them and put them in their beds? I need to rest, I’m really tired,” Sophia asked. Henry nodded, taking the twins and putting them in their beds. He sat back down on the bed, sitting next to Sophia as she fell asleep.

File 1AE281971- Start of Fredbear’s Family Diner Development

The date is February 8, 1971. William and Henry sat in William’s office below his house, watching as Henry filmed the animatronics that stood in front of them. Henry ended the recording, turning the camera off.

”Finally, the perfect take,” Henry said.

”Hm…” William replied, lost in thought. Henry turned to William, confused.

”Everything alright, Will?” Henry asked, concerned.

”Yeah, I’m fine. I was just thinking… Our TV show has become really popular, but we’re not really making any money off of it since the station we’re collaborating with is taking most of the money… Maybe if we made something else with it we could rack in more sales?” William said.

”Maybe… But what should we make with it?” Henry asked. The two went quiet, thinking.

”Well… I don’t think a video game would do well… That industry’s still pretty new…” William said.

”Yeah… Maybe children’s books?” Henry suggested.

”Maybe… But we would need to hire artists for that since no one in this family really does cartoon drawing…” William said.

”True… Maybe it could be a place instead of a piece of media? Maybe something like a theme park,” Henry suggested.

”A theme park would be too expensive to run though… What about a restaurant?” William suggested.

”A restaurant?” Henry asked.

”Yeah! It could be a themed diner where the characters perform live! It’ll give us somewhere to put the characters, and a better place to film the series. Think about it!” William replied.

”Honestly… That doesn’t sound too bad…” Henry said.

”I know! We could also test out that new technology that I was telling you about!” William said.

”Oh, you mean the springlock suits?” Henry asked.

”Yeah, we can put that new tech into Fredbear and Springbonnie since they’re the main characters, so the main characters can interact with guests,” William said.

”That’s not a bad idea… We should probably fix up the designs for the characters so they’re more presentable in public,” Henry said.

”I’ll get onto that. Do you know a building we could rent out or buy for a low price?” William asked.

”No, but I’ll look around,” Henry said.

”Alright! Let’s do this!” William said. Henry nodded. William grabbed some blueprint paper, rolling it out and grabbing a sketching pencil. He started to sketch out blueprints as Henry gave pointers along the way.

File 1A3141972- Remus’s Diagnosis

The date is March 14, 1972. The Aftons sat outside a doctor’s office. Remus fidgeted around in his seat as the five waited.

”I don’t know why you forced us to come here and do this. You are fine, you’re just fucking sensitive,” William said.

”William, the teachers all suggested this. They’ve been saying that Remus has been having issues and has been having a lot of emotional outbursts,” Clara said.

”Those teachers don’t know what they’re talking about,” William muttered. The twins didn’t really listen to the rest of their parent’s conversation as the two talked. Roman put a hand on Remus’s shoulder, Remus looking over to Roman.

”Re? Are you okay?” Roman asked. Remus nodded, clutching Golden close to their chest. Roman extended his arms out to his twin, Remus standing up and walking over to him. Remus sat on Roman’s chair next to him, hugging him tightly. Roman hugged back, holding Remus close protectively.

”It’s okay, Re… We’re going to be fine…” Roman whispered to Remus. Remus smiled a little. A doctor soon came out of the room the Aftons were sitting outside, walking over to Clara and William.

”Are you Mr. and Mrs. Afton?” the doctor asked.

”Yes,” William replied.

”Alright. I’m going to need you to come into the room so we can discuss the results, please,” the doctor said. William nodded, the two standing up and following the doctor. Clara stopped in front of the twins, handing them a coloring book and some crayons.

”Me and Papa are going to talk to the doctor a little now. Stay right here, okay?” Clara said. The twins nodded, Roman grabbing the coloring book and crayons from Clara. Clara walked into the room, closing the door behind her before walking over to where the other two sat. She sat down next to William, turning to the doctor.

”So, what are the results?” Clara asked.

”Well… It is very clear your son has autism-” the doctor started.

”WHAT?!” William said, slamming his hands on the table.

”Sir, please calm down…” the doctor said.

”My son is not of the devil!” William said.

”Sir… Autism doesn’t make you ‘of the devil’, now please sit down,” the doctor said. William rolled his eyes, crossing his arms and sitting down.

”Now, as I was saying… Your son has autism… This is a neurodevelopmental disability that will affect how your son communicates. It also makes him more sensitive to things like sound, touch, smell, temperature, light, and so on. My advice is to take it slow when dealing with him, be clear with communication, and be quiet. Your son’s going to have a tricky time dealing with this, so please do not make it worse,” the doctor advised.

”Don’t tell us how to parent our child,” William said, glaring at the doctor.

”Sir, I am simply giving you advice so you can deal with this-” the doctor started.

”We’re leaving, come on, Clara,” William said. Clara nodded, the two standing up and walking out of the room. The doctor sighed, putting a hand to his face. William and Clara walked out to the hallway, letting the door slam shut behind them. They grabbed their children, walking down the hallway.

”Papa?” Remus asked, confused as to why William and Clara were so angry.

”Don’t talk to me,” William said. Remus frowned, clutching his bear tightly.

The five eventually got home, Michael bolting up to his room the second he stepped into the house. William grabbed the twins by the arms, pulling them over to the couch as the twins cried at the pain in their arms. William threw the two to the couch, the twins landing next to each other and latching onto each other, terrified at the random acts of violence from their father.

”Papa?” Remus asked, tears rolling down his face.

”Don’t call me that, devil child!” William said, Remus clinging onto Roman tighter, “You and your brother are fucking mistakes. You should have never been born.”

”Mama…” Remus said, looking to Clara who just looked away. Remus looked back up at William, terrified.

”You are being pulled out of school, and being homeschooled. You are not to leave this house unless absolutely necessary. Do you understand?” William said. Remus nodded, clinging onto Roman as Roman just stared up at his father.

”Now, you two go to your room and do not come out for the rest of the day,” William said, pointing to the stairs. The twins rushed up to their room, Roman slamming the door closed and locking it. Remus laid on their bunk on the bunk bed, curling up into a little ball and letting all of their emotions out. Roman frowned, walking over to Remus and laying down next to him. He held his sibling close, scared to let go. Remus clung onto Roman, still sobbing though it was more quieter and controlled.

”Why does Papa hate us now…” Remus asked, clinging onto Roman.

”I don’t know… But we’re going to be okay! Papa loves us, he does! He said so himself!” Roman said. Remus smiled sadly, snuggling closer to Roman. Roman held his twin close as Remus fell asleep, scared of what would happen next.

File 1AE7181972- Fredbear’s is Opened for Private Testing

The date is July 18, 1972. William and Henry stood outside the building, looking at their work.

”Well, this is it. It’s time to open up for private testing. You put the ads out, right?” William asked.

”Yup, now all we have to do is wait,” Henry said. Over the next few days, mail started to pour in, everyone eager to test the new restaurant. The reviews were mostly positive, with only a few negative reviews about the animatronics being ‘too lifelike’. After almost a year of private testing, William and Henry eventually got the courage to open to the public.

File 1AE5161973- Fredbear’s is Officially Open to the Public

The date is May 16, 1973. It’s the day of the grand opening of Fredbear’s Family Diner. Both Henry and William were dressed up nicely in suits. Currently the two stood in the bathroom at the diner, making a few last minute fixes to their outfits.

”Ready for this?” William asked, adjusting his bowtie.

”Yup, let’s go,” Henry replied. The two walked out of the bathroom, going to the front of the building. The two both gave quick speeches before cutting the ribbon and officially opening the diner. People poured into the diner, William and Henry immediately going to work fulfilling orders, and serving and entertaining customers.

File 1M741974- Martinzon Moving Day 2

The date is July 4, 1974. Andy packed up the last of the things in the car as Maria and Janus hung out in the yard.

”Are you two ready?” Andy asked, walking over to the two.

”Yeah, you have everything in the car, right?” Maria asked.

”Yup, we can get on the road,” Andy said.

”Alright,” Maria replied, standing up.

”Come on, Janny. Say bye-bye to the house,” Maria said, grabbing Janus’s hand.

”Bye bye, house!” Janus said, waving goodbye before walking off with Maria and Andy. Maria helped Janus into the car, getting him set up with a coloring book and some crayons.

”Are you all good, baby?” Maria asked, letting go of Janus’s hand. Janus nodded, opening the coloring book and starting to color. Maria got into the car as Andy started the car, buckling up before Andy started to drive. The three drove for a while until they got to a small house on the end of the road. Maria helped Janus out of the car as Andy started to grab some boxes from the back. Maria grabbed the rest of the boxes, the three walking into their new home. The three got inside, Maria and Andy placing the boxes down on a table before turning to each other.

”Alright, time to organize everything,” Andy said. The three organized and decorated the house for the rest of the day, making sure to stop for lunch and dinner. They then ended their day with a movie night on the couch before falling asleep on the couch together.

Masterpost // Previous // Next

[ofgravitation-moved]

pro hero: sensory girl!

hey !! remember my girl, rhea rose? the cute coffee girl at your local coffee shop? well! she's getting a b.nha verse !!

** it's actually a crossover verse i had developed a year or more ago for a character that never really much took off? so, rhea's getting it since she's had more traction! this idea was derived from meredy from fairy tail & the teen wolf series!

** disclaimer: i do not claim to own rhea! her art is all from the webtoon: reunion! by creator: stephatty!

name: rhea rose

age: verse dependent. / mainly, early to mid 20s.

quirk: sensory link - allowing the wielder of the quirk to link their senses with someone else they've physically touched / or have a strong bond with.

rhea can link others with herself, or other people together entirely. the linked people are distinguished by a seal that looks like a heart on one of their wrists. the two people being connected to rhea do not have to be near each other in order for this quirk to work.

her quirk though not healing in nature, has been developed to fall more into that category. when touching an injured person, rhea can create a link, and she takes on that person's injuries. vice versa, if she was wounded, and she linked with another, they could take her pain.

when linked, all senses are shared: thought, taste, smell, sight, and touch. it's not a very combative quirk, however, rhea did attend u.a. and became recovery girl's sidekick. so she is trained in many forms of hand to hand combat and can defend herself rather well. also, her ability to link with someone and be able to predict their moves on the battlefield can be very helpful in a fight.

history: healing quirks are hard to come by, and even harder to find. because of all for one's previous endeavors of acquiring multiple quirks, healing quirks nearly became non-existent. and recovery girl knew that one day there would be a day where she'd need an apprentice. she wouldn't live forever.

recovery girl approached the rose family when rhea was a young girl. her quirk was on the dangerous quirk list. & when that list crossed recovery girl's desk, she contacted the family and told the rose's of her plans to work with rhea and her quirk, grooming her in the fields of medicine: she'd have a specialized course at ua, tuition fully paid for-- it was a no brainer. rhea had been scouted from the time she was a young girl-- but she never wanted to be a hero. until, she saw day in and day out the difference that recovery girl made in other people's lives.

after the first few weeks of internships and then work studies at recovery girl's side in the later years of her schooling at u.a, rhea began to better understand what was expected for her: what recovery girl, expected of her.

she took up the rescue hero course, trained as an emt, and then as a nurse after. three years after graduation, trained with knowledge of a doctor, and the combative skills of a pro hero, sensory girl became recovery girl's sidekick and rarely has left her side since.

current: rhea lives in a decent apartment right near jaku general hospital. she's close enough to work that she rarely has to take a train. she splits her time with recovery girl between the hospital and u.a's infirmary. the kids in class 1-a this year are some of the most reckless she's ever seen, honestly.

her work as a sidekick is more as a medical aid / trauma medic on the battlefield than anything else. aside from assisting recovery girl in any capacity needed with surgeries and injuries in the er at the hospital, she's always on call to any hero in need also. as fast as her car can take her, that is. she can't fly, unless she links with someone else that has a quirk that can.

she's so busy most days, she has little to no free time. what free time she does have is usually spent relaxing with a coffee at a local coffee shop her family owns. often on a weekend, you'll find her there lending a hand, though she takes no profits or tips.

[fluxofthemouth]

Dune Messiah Verse drabble || Also a prologue for a thread! @succubus-lili

Content warning for canon-typical violence & death

-----------

The Grand Arrakeen is one of the capital's better known hotels. It's close enough to the palace to be within reasonable walking distance of just about everything interesting. It's also far enough away to properly have the appearance of a large and impressive building, without the obligation to shrink under the shadow of comparison. The hotel does its part to be gaudy and kitschy, a friendly nod to the pilgrim fever that has perpetually swept up the local culture. You can buy spiritual knickknacks in the gift shop that were manufactured on Giedi Prime. Over an impressive span of 20,000 years, chai has stubbornly persisted as a word for tea, and there's a cafe on the ground level called Chai Hulud. But underneath the hotel's cheerful concessions to the tourist industry, there's a beating heart of sincere effort. A genuine investment in providing a service of value. Many of the hotel's customers come to understand and appreciate this, which is why many of them keep coming back.

Indeed, unlike many of the businesses that have come to thrive in Arrakeen, the Grand Arrakeen is no insincere tourist trap strung up to make money quickly for as little effort as possible. It's the crown jewel of Evangeline Sky, a rising star in the hospitality industry who came to Dune with nothing and now owns more than twenty properties across the planet.

Evangeline is also a seventy-nine year old woman. And according to a story that is consistent across several witnesses, a guest named Brody Angler yanked her cane out of her hands and threw it at her just a few days ago. She and a group of her friends had happened to pass him and one of his traveling companions in a hallway, and she had only asked him to speak more quietly during the late hours. She wasn't badly hurt, but Brody's sudden violence had scared her. And it galled her to see how Brody had laughed and laughed.

The other noteworthy thing about the Grand Arrakeen and other hotels in the family business, the other thing in addition to the undercurrent of sincerity behind their operation, is that sometimes people die there. Not often, but just often enough to get people wondering what the normal number for yearly deaths in hotels is.

Piter de Vries could find that number out pretty quickly. It would be the number of deaths total, minus everybody who died because he wanted them to. Evangeline Sky is an industry giant and a seventy-nine year old woman, and she is also Piter's mother. He isn't really thriving like she is, in this new shape the galaxy and its Empire have taken. Nor was he thriving in the Empire's previous form. But he does own one or two of the hotels, and he does keep himself occupied with an information brokerage. That doesn't actually bring in a lot of money directly, but his efforts are as sincere as Evangeline's, and his clients recognize that just as gratefully. People come to his operation regularly, and he comes to know of many things that happen on the planet. Changing out the man playing at Emperor did not impact a simple truth that Piter knew well in his previous role: information is a kind of currency all on its own. The practice also fuels a hell of a lot of drama, which he then gets to be in the thick of.

When it comes to those unlucky people Piter chooses to target (a complication to his claim of being a retired assassin), most are connected to scandals and secrets he uncovered through his hobby, with many of these deaths contracted explicitly by clients. Unsurprisingly, Evangeline doesn't like bloodshed near the hotels that have become both her life's work and the revenue stream they both depend on. Piter has to be careful and choosy about pursuing targets through family-owned hotels; sometimes showing restraint despite how easy it would be otherwise, sometimes hiding his tracks even from his mother.

The other, smaller category of people Piter wants killed is the category of people who think they get to make trouble for Evangeline.

Piter lives in Carthag these days. He doesn't come out to Arrakeen very often because he knows full well that the Emperor's people are likely to torture and kill him if they happen to recognize him as a former Harkonnen agent. The one who crafted the plan that killed the Emperor's father, even! And the one who personally ordered the Emperor and his mother to be left in the desert for the worms.

(Oh, how those were very different times! And how is one supposed to know that the scrawny teenage son of a disfavored Duke is going to be an emperor someday? Also, in most cases, sending someone out into the desert for the worms has this tendency of actively preventing them from becoming an emperor, or much of anything.)

Evangeline, meanwhile, doesn't end up making it out to Carthag all that often, because she is busy and because of her age. Their relationship can be strained, but it isn't fraught. Piter grins openly as he watches her react to opening the door and finding him there, even as he knows he's in for a kind of scolding: there's surprise, then a tender gladdening, then suspicion and disapproval, then worry. She beckons him in quickly, as if Atreides' people were actively scouring the streets for him. He hugs her and takes his time, soaking in affection.

"If you're here, I suppose Angler is already dead," Evangeline says matter-of-factly as she heads towards the kitchen to make tea. There is affection for him here, but he needs to know that he can get more of it by killing fewer people in her goddamn hotels.

There's been a measure of guilt in Piter's aspect from the start. Now, it flares up prominently, and alongside some cheeky non-repentance, in a different sort of grin. It's not the least unsettling expression a human face has ever made.

"Angler has been dead, Mother," Piter replies, almost as matter-of-factly, but with a keening hope of praise. "Since the moment he made the choice to scare and hurt you. Won't you let yourself be precious to someone?" He taps sand from his boots in the entryway and hangs up his cloak. An attempt to venture further into the house stops cold at a gesture from Evangeline, and he works on shaking the sand from his clothes more thoroughly there in the entryway.

"You know how I feel about bloodshed in my hotels," Evangeline says, disappearing into the kitchen. She notes, and has noted, a spineless proclivity towards obedience in Piter, and she thinks it's pathetic. That doesn't stop her from counting on that same quality to keep him from tracking sand in her living room even though she isn't watching.

These conversations always end at an impasse. If Evangeline presses the point too thoroughly that she disapproves of brutality, they will have to face the squirming truth that he ended up in a school built on a premise of psychological torture, and was taught to be a ruthless killer there, on her watch as a parent. Meanwhile, if Piter presses the point too thoroughly that he loves her and wants to keep her safe, they will have to face another delicate reality. That she struggled through years of poverty on Giedi Prime while he climbed his way to a cushy government career and spent the money getting high.

So they grumble and fuss over tea. They trade little comments that could mean anything and nothing, and they avoid statements that are truthlike enough to really draw blood. They would each like to win the argument, in theory, but they don't know how to, and they slowly come to the unspoken agreement that it isn't urgent anyway. Piter hasn't broken any line of Evangeline's that truly must not be crossed. Underneath the clash of perspectives and the drama of it all, they actually find each other's presence calming. Like recognizing like. They are both dangerous creatures in their own way. They are both generally unsuited to caretaking, too. That's a scab that they can pick at. It's also a shared trait they can find common ground in, however dark. Barbs give way to curiosity, then to jokes and easy smiles as they chat there in the living room, each wearing the deep scars of the other's neglect. Two tigers wearing stripes companionably.

"I hate to bring up Angler again," Evangeline says, finally. "But he didn't suffer, did he?"

"He suffered terribly," Piter says emotionlessly, into a mostly empty mug.

"Oh," Evangeline says. She raises her eyebrows, pours herself more tea, and offers more to her son. It isn't a disappointed oh.

Piter beams and can't look directly at her as he sets the mug on the coffee table and slides it forward. He's accepted by now that he isn't going to get the style of praise he was hoping for. But here, finally, is the style of praise he''s been waiting for.

[aparecium-rp]

ABOUT:

Character name: Lily Potter Age & Birthday: 21 & January 30th Gender & Pronouns: Cis-female & She/Her Occupation: Owl Post Owls Trainer Blood status: Muggleborn Previous house: Gryffindor Affiliation: Order of the Phoenix Face claim: Sadie Sink

BIOGRAPHY:

Dr. Evans and his wife had always been very much comfortable in their way of living, thank you very much. The couple had been school sweethearts, breaking up for only a few years before reconnecting in their mid twenties and marrying soon after, having two daughters Petunia and Lily. And they had been the near perfect family. Mrs. Evans was a school teacher, giving her ideal hours to be home with her daughters when her husband was stuck in the hospital overnight or for long periods at a time. And little Petunia and Lily were as close as any two could be. Lily had never once doubted how loved she was or her place in her family’s hearts, even if she had always been a tad… odd. She had special talents, skills like the tricks she read about in the story books she collected from the library each week that even before she knew exactly what it was she was doing, she knew she was not supposed to share with anyone else. Petunia was the first person she had ever confided in about her magic, eyes wide with excitement as she looked up at her, eager to finally be able to impress her big sister like Tuney always impressed her with her big girl math facts and ballet tricks. But she hadn’t been impressed; instead she rushed Lily inside, out of the garden and into her bedroom to scold her telling fibs and showing off, insisting that whatever that was that Lily was doing, it was wrong.

Petunia’s reluctance to believe her only made Lily more stubborn and in turn, less careful about where she had tried to show her new favorite tricks. Her sister had been more agitated than ever when she had been caught, but Lily had only felt excitement over meeting someone else who could do the same things she could. It wasn’t only Severus’s knowledge of the magical world, of what would soon be her world as well, that drew her to the boy. The two clicked immediately to the point where all of Lily’s free time she would normally spend with Petunia went to playing with Severus. They weren’t exactly the same or opposites, they simply complimented each other well and their friendship carried through to Hogwarts, even after they had been sorted into separate houses and everyone told Lily it shouldn’t.

Her time at Hogwarts had been more than Lily could have even imagined for herself, to the point she still slips up all these years after graduating and mentally refers to the castle as home. It had been for seven years; Gryffindor Tower had been where she went to bed each night and her peers had quickly begun to understand her life more than her family ever could, no matter how much she loved them. It was a struggle, balancing her old life with this new world that she was now a part of while leaving her old one behind. As much as Lily struggled to explain magic, she also couldn’t keep up with the technology of the muggle world- Petunia had drug her to a local cafe they always hated simply because it had some game called pong. After only a short while Lily realized she had no interest in it, her mind having wandered off on how she could get the final score of the Harpies match while home with her family. While it was the first time she cried over this divide, her feeling of not belonging anywhere would only get worse as the years went on.

At least her parents continued to try; Lily’s sister had begun to give up after that day. They hadn’t been as close as they were as children since Lily got her acceptance letter, but they still pretended for nostalgia sake. It had been easier to deny they bickered more than they got along and each had their own issues with each other. Lily hadn’t been innocent either, she had only written Petunia six times the entirety of her fourth year. The more distanced the two sisters grew, the more Lily put into her friendship with Severus, even as her other friends’ negative opinions on him began to grow more merit. She hadn’t been ready to accept the fact that had they not met all those years ago Severus would have been okay with the worst of things happening to her, just like he was okay with it happening to other muggleborns just like her.

She feels like a narcissist looking back on that day by the lake. Why did it have to take her being the target of his words to see past the pedestal she had put her best friend on and realize she was pinning all the blame on Potter while turning a blind eye to Severus’s own actions? That guilt may even play a larger part in her giving James a chance than her noticing a change in him, she had just finally forced herself to look past outer appearances and preconceived notions. “I don’t need help from filthy mudbloods like her!” Deep down Lily knew his feelings on muggleborns long before that day but she felt above the rest of them, at least she had with Severus. There was a disconnect before; Lily was special, not like the rest of the muggleborn students whom she knew most of Slytherin house looked down on so strongly. She was smarter than any other muggleborn student in their year, was a part of the Slug Club and thought perhaps she found a place she had entirely belonged in the magical world. The fact that it was Severus who took that away from her hurt more than anything else. She had been knocked down a few pegs herself, humbled in a way that she hadn’t thought she needed until that moment.

Lily had begun to question a lot after that day. She almost went back and fixed things with Severus multiple times the first few months after their fight, wanting to apologize for embarrassing him when he was already in a vulnerable state or for joining in the taunting by calling him that name she knew he hated so much. Potter and his friends didn’t know why Severus acted that way, Lily did, and using that against him felt wrong. But she had stood up for him since they were eleven years old, he admitted his distaste of those of her birth and no matter how much she wanted him back in her life she had to cut him off at some point. He had passed that point long before calling her that word and her refusal to see things without the rose tinted glasses of childhood friendship was what kept her locked in her dorm room crying for days on end.

Coming back to school the following September had been difficult. Petunia had shut her out completely, deciding at some point over the previous year Lily had become too much of a ‘freak’ to be around her and her friends, especially that complete prat Vernon she had seemed to spend an awful lot of the summer around. One of the few things that pulled her out of her funk was a growing friendship with James Potter. She worried her opinions of him had been predetermined by her past friendships, or that single train ride when they were only eleven years old. Lily had changed so much in that time, who was she to decide he hadn’t without giving him a proper chance. Or to say this new version of Lily Evans disliked James Potter just because the old one had in solidarity. Whatever the reasoning was Lily slowly found herself actively seeking James out, waiting back in classes or happening to do homework outside the same time he would be coming back from Quidditch practice. She developed strong feelings, more quickly than she had been prepared for and for the first time a crush had given her that sense of fear and butterflies her mother always talked about getting when she met her father.

But Lily had rejected him quite publicly and rudely which left an entirely separate set of nerves to go along with her new found feelings. If James even had been serious in his attempt to ask her out, she still wasn’t entirely sure, who was to say he hadn’t moved on and decided she wasn’t worth it. He could have just as easily only been nice to her because he knew she was struggling, because they had become heads together and it would have been too awkward to be anything overwise. She hadn’t thought James would become her world even more quickly than he had become a schoolyard crush.

A filthy little mudblood. For a time Lily had allowed those words to define her entire being. They were what came out of her mouth when she tried to laugh off the fear of those she loved most putting their lives in danger for a war over the rights of people like her, because she didn’t know how to cope otherwise. They were what she called herself when she woke up crying in the middle of the night, or during an angry rant during Order meetings. No one needed a filthy little mudblood like her. Sticks and stones her mother used to say, and before she knew any better Lily parroted along. But words do hurt, they have a power over people much stronger than a broken wrist. She always bounced back from a curse gone wrong, it was the words directed at her when she was practically a child that left Lily feeling broken and defeated.

Perhaps it had been the war raging on around them, their involvement that made life seem so fleeting and highlighted the importance of every little moment

OOC INFO:

Played by: Ashlie Time Zone: EST

[violentivy]

REEL FEELS DAY 3: The nebula in my room

Day 3 of being annoyingly sick. Like, I'm fine but my sinuses are a bit clogged, I feel a bit lethargic, and occasionally I'll spike a fever. It isn't covid, if I had a name for it I would call it "annoying little cold that I picked up because I forgot I had a body that I had to take care of"

This early morning photo is in my bedroom at dawn today. The light hit just right, to make it look as though a nebula was forming in my room. The red light is the TV we have in here.

The TV that used to be in my living room. The TV that STILL has crayon on it from when my kids tried to make a cartoon on the screen. I mean they were 3 and 4 respectively, the logic made sense to them at the time.

These are the scars and the stories I carry.

It means something to ME, but to the other people involved, one in jail, 3 living with their adoptive parents who don't like me, my daughter... These are just stories. There is very little shared history surprisingly. You would think over 9-13 years, some memories would stick. Some good ones.

You would think that, wouldn't you.

Naw. That's not the way kids brains work. Especially in a home that was trauma city.

We had poverty trauma.

We had the constant threat of my son's dad's potential death from Epilepsy. (look up SUDEP if you love someone with epilepsy and like to have nightmares)

We had my first ex who would every now and again just show up and pretend like we were all friends.

Then there were the seizures which felt like a constant threat.

CPS case after CPS case.

Life was really difficult.

Still we had love, and family and these kids that would just say the weirdest shit. I am firmly committed to the idea my kids were tapped into something weird and witchy from go.

My daughter told me she knew my oldest son from "baby heaven" and that they used to hang out all of the time.

That time when my son and his friend started screaming "FLUFFY KNIFEY" in the back of my friends car.

That time when all of my kids learned all of the words to Atlas by Battles and Buzzer by Dar Williams, and would just burst into song frequently.

There's not much creepier than a 3 year old singing "The people won't be people when they hear this sound..."

Or the time when my two older sons started chanting "7:16, through the outer space, never wake up, NEVER FALL ASLEEP." In the back of my car.

Even if I weren't their mother, and I didn't have this evolutionary need to make sure they were ok, I wanted to see how they turned out over my curiosity.

Space always reminds me of my kids. But also my husband.

@drnyx is my husband of 7 years (give or take, I'm told I don't measure time correctly.)

When he and I first got together, I used to stroke his temples while I watched him sleep. We were both in our 30s, and his temples were starting to go grey (they're close to white now.)

He would open his eyes from time to time. And I would see a galaxy being born there in their hazel pools. These were quiet and intimate moments where there was no expectation of speaking, just connection.

At that time, my heart was a dangerous neighborhood. There was a lot of broken glass, triggers, booby traps and not the fun kind. Nyxie navigated it all.

These moments of quiet reflection, in the predawn of my previous martial bedroom, as the sun streamed in under the blinds and across a triangle of his face.

We seldom wake up together anymore.

And that guts me.

But, in running from our traumas it is important that we do not recreate them. See also POVERTY TRAUMA.

This means that we both have jobs, good ones too at the local university. He at the hospital and I in the Student Union.

And he with his 4 FUCKING degrees.

He won't tell you that without coaching by the way, he's gonna see this and get embarrassed.

But, I can say that for now, we are not in poverty which is staying something.

And here in my room today, unseen to the naked eye, was a nebulaesque cloud.

I just happened to take a picture. And I just happened to get the right amount of saturation to be able to see it.

And that feels nice.

[bloodredemption]

[ jill wagner, f, she/her ] whatever you think you know about FELICITY “FLICK” JAMES, the 46 year old, HETEROSEXUAL, LOCAL, it is likely time for you to start reconsidering. the rumored WEREWOLF (BETA) is often described as RESOURCEFUL + LOYAL, but don’t let them fool you; they can also be CONFRONTATIONAL + AGGRESSIVE, which often has them regarded as the RUNAWAY. they are a PHARMACIST at NEW HOPE HEALTH CENTRE, but it’s also said they are a BETA within the CREATION PEAKS PACK. whatever you hear, you can’t deny there’s more to them that meets the eye, and it’s time we start uncovering the truth.

Basics:

Full Name: Felicity “Flick” James

Age: 46

Gender/Pronouns: Female (she/her).

Species: Born Werewolf 

Affiliations: Creation Peaks Pack (Beta), New Hope Health Centre (Pharmacist)

Ex-Affiliations: Blood Moon Pack (Beta)

Family: Juliet Matthews (Mother, Deceased), Sam Matthews (Father, Deceased), [Blank] James (husband, alive)

Appearance:

Faceclaim: Jill Wagner

Eye Color: Light Brown

Hair Color:  Light Brown

Height: 5′8″

Tattoos, Birthmarks, Scars, etc: Scars from Alpha attacks in the past

Biography Flick was born in Providence, Rhode Island to two pure blood werewolves. Juliet and Sam had both just joined the Lorenz pack, working their way up to becoming betas. They had married, both abandoning their previous packs for being too tame, and not appreciating that humans were beneath werewolves - something they raised Flick to believe. 

As she got older, Flick would regularly go out on hunts with Razor and Heaven, fascinated by Razor’s whole demeaner, though she knew ultimately that Heaven would be Alpha. Her and Razor got so close that the two eventually started dating, it being a natural progression that eventually, she could become his wife. 

It was supposed to be an ordinary hunt, humans in the area who could be rounded up and killed. But what they hadn’t expected was the heavy artillery the hunters would have, Flick watching helpless as the hunters murdered their attackers - the Lorenz Alpha and his wife, as well as Flick’s parents.

Flick stayed with Razor, enduring his rages and anger, and supporting Heaven as much as she could, pushing to be third in command after Razor. As he approached his sister, challenging her to a fight, she tried to warn him not to, that things were fine as they were. But her pleas fell on death ears, and she watched as Razor tore his sister’s throat out, declaring himself the Alpha.

Almost immediately, the pack felt even more extreme, the hunts more aggressive, more frequent, and even Flick felt sickened by it. It wasn’t just humans being targeted, it was other smaller, weaker packs, anyone that showed any sympathy towards humans, and killing pack members that tried to leave or disobey. That was why Flick waited until the pack were all asleep after a hunt, and she fled, leaving everything behind, shifting and running as far as she could, trying everything she could to lose her scent, so Razor didn’t find her. She’d be dead if he did.

She ran until she came to Creation Peaks, and it didn’t take long for the town Alpha to approach her, warning her of how things were ran there, and Flick was honest about her past, about her disdain for humans, and an agreement was reached - she would be allowed to stay, but she had to change her ways. 

And over time, she did, getting herself a job at the hospital, and eventually  even meeting a human and falling in love. Still, softening to humans hasn’t been a weakness to her, still aggressively protecting the pack where she needs to, more than willing to be the muscle and get her hands dirty if someone needs to attack. 

She just never thought she’d see the Lorenz pack again. It’s her worst nightmare coming true.

[mygainyear2024]

Day 38-39 Vila Nova de Milfontes to Nazaré

Portuguese people are so friendly. The staff member at the accommodation in Vila Nova de Milfontes offered to stay behind on his shift for one hour to give me a lift to the bus stop. I could not accept. I had plenty of time to walk slowly and manoeuvre two suitcases along cobblestone footpaths and play dodge with cars on the road. I got there in plenty of time, and the bus was late. It was the hottest day so far this year, 31°. It was usual bus conditions, small seating space, full, no room for a backpack in the overhead compartment it was too narrow, and don't look out the front window as the bus was so far up the cars in front it was concerning!

The first 20 minutes I was sitting next to a lovely young epidemiologist from Devon, who was doing the Fisherman's Trail on her own for 5 days. Last year she travelled around SE Asia and South America for 9 months on her own. The next passenger beside me had the sniffles, for two hours, all the way to Lisboa. The bus depot was incredibly basic for a capital city. The connection time was just over an hour, so not too long, and then I was on my way to Nazaré, a journey of just under two hours. This time I accepted the Portuguese hospitality when the airbnb host offered to collect me and drive me to the apartment. You'll see from the photos, it would have been a bit of a struggle with the hills.

My first day I spent gathering supplies for the week. First stop mercado municipale to buy some fruit and a pastel de nata. The store holder and someone she was serving asked if I was español after I said "um pastel de nata, por favour". The Portuguese language lessons may be useful in Spain! Mixed with my little bit of French and German from school and a smattering of Italian words from previous trips, it will be fun trying.

I checked out the local gym and then walked to Aldi. It was already quite warm around 9.30 this morning, no need for the MAC puffer jacket!

I spent the afternoon wandering around Nazaré, shopping and taking photos. Noticeably there are a lot of French tourists here. I did get asked if I spoke French to assist a couple find Old Town. The shoe stores were quite popular among the tourists. There are also some lovely homewares stores and most things I like are fragile!

It was a very relaxing afternoon, except for being groped by an older man in his store. As the other tourists left his tiny shop, he got closer to me, so close I could smell alcohol on his breathe. He actually tapped my bum twice, the first time I thought it was in error, but the second time was quite obvious, as my bum noticeably wobbled. OMFG, get out of there!

As an aside, I had a short conversation with a Portuguese woman from Lisboa at the bus stop in Vila Nove de Milfontes about social issues. She said there are no women's refuges and up until just very recently family and domestic violence was not talked about or recognised as an issue.

On my list for this afternoon, to walk to Sitio and on to Praia do Norte to check out the location of the biggest waves in the world, up to 30 metres has been recorded, but not this month! They happen in March every year. Sadly the museum closed at 6pm, so I'll return. I also tried to make my way onto the beach, but that was a stretch physically. So I'll also be checking that out again as I want to get a perspective from the beach. I did see one guy jump in.

[reasoningdaily]

Yahoo Finance: Laid-off food workers claim their 'right to return' to jobs was violated at Hotel Figueroa

Two days after the food hospitality operator at a fashionable downtown hotel shuttered its restaurants and laid off its food and beverage employees, a new third-party management company moved in and hired a whole new set of workers, according to a complaint filed with the Los Angeles city attorney’s office.

The laid-off food and beverage laborers had attempted to unionize months earlier. They allege that Hotel Figueroa and hospitality operator the Botanical Group left them out of the hiring, potentially violating a city "right to return" law that requires that new hotel owners or new operators retain the site’s employees for a transitional period, according to the complaint.

A Feb. 21 letter addressed to the city attorney’s office asks for an investigation. A spokesperson for the office confirmed receipt of the complaint but wouldn't comment further on the matter.

“The company closed without retaining workers in violation of the recall law,” said Kurt Petersen, co-president of Unite Here Local 11, which is aiding the hotel workers in their effort. ”It is beyond outrageous to see wealthy companies … treat their long-standing workers like they are disposable.”

Read more: Restaurant workers wanted to unionize at this L.A. hotel. Now the restaurants are closing

The hotel is denying the premise of the workers' complaint.

In a prepared statement, a spokesperson for Hotel Figueroa said its ownership is “acting in accordance” with the Los Angeles Hotel Worker Retention Ordinance, which requires that new hotel owners or operators retain the site’s employees for a transitional period. The 2006 ordinance initially applied only to hotels in the LAX corridor. In 2022, a new hotel worker protection ordinance expanded the existing law to include all city hotels with more than 50 guestrooms.

The retention rule is intended to protect laid-off hotel workers so that if a hotel undergoes a change in control, the successor hotel employer is required to hire previous employees for a 90-day transition period and may not discharge these employees without cause.

The Hotel Figueroa spokesperson said there isn’t a new food and beverage operator in place, but that they are instead working with a “consultant to provide limited F&B [food and beverage] service.” Several former staff members of the former third-party management group returned to the hotel’s food and beverage outlets, she said, and they expect more will return in the next few weeks.

When asked how many non-managerial staff had been hired back, the spokesperson said the company wouldn’t comment further.

The Botanical Group did not respond to emails and message for comment.

The 2006 retention ordinance was drafted in response to mass firings that occurred in 2000 at a Wyndham hotel near LAX. The hotel closed and laid off more than 200 employees. The hotel reopened as the Radisson Hotel LAX about a year later but did not hire all of the former Wyndham workers, even though more than 100 of them submitted applications.

Since then, the law has been invoked a handful of times, said Maria Hernandez, a spokeswoman with Unite Here Local 11.

On a recent Friday afternoon, a bartender at the reopened Bar Magnolia said he and the other bartenders present were new to the job, as well as other non-management employees. The space once occupied by Sparrow Italia, which served coastal Italian dishes and cocktails in an indoor-meets-outdoor setting, remained closed.

A dishwasher, line cook and prep cook interviewed previously about Hotel Figueroa also said they had been laid off and not rehired by the new operator.

Workers sought to organize

Tension between the former hospitality group Noble 33 and its employees at Hotel Figueroa started soon after the third-party management took over food and beverage operations for the hotel in 2021, according to workers and union organizers who spoke with The Times.

Workers said they were forced to take on multiple tasks without more pay as their colleagues left and management failed to back-fill positions.

On Dec. 8, back-of-house food and beverage workers who worked for Noble 33 notified their management that they intended to form a union, and submitted cards to do so.

Six days later, hospitality operator Noble 33 announced it would close Sparrow Italia, Café Fig, Bar Magnolia, the Cafeteria and La Casita at Driftwood at the famed hotel, a historic building in downtown L.A. that for the last two decades built a following for its Mediterranean-inspired space and stylish dining rooms.

Read more: Helping Indigenous restaurant workers in the languages they speak

Noble 33 followed through on the closure. On Feb. 11, the company laid off an estimated 100 non-management employees and closed the Hotel Figueroa’s restaurants.

Maria Ibarra, a cook for Noble 33 at the hotel, said she was laid off and not rehired. She now faces unemployment.

“The owners thought they could just replace us overnight and that we would give up and walk away,” Ibarra said. “My co-workers and I will not do that. We have rights.”

Wednesday, Unite Here Local 11, workers and religious leaders called for a boycott of the hotel and hospitality group, at a morning press conference in front of Hotel Figueroa.

The group also delivered a letter signed by nearly 500 people demanding that the hotel bring back the laid-off workers.

"We call on you to immediately offer to return the workers to their employment at the hotel and compensate them for time missed," the letter said.

The boycott is just the latest move taken by workers and the union.

On Friday, nearly 40 people picketed at Hotel Figueroa — seven of them hotel housekeepers alongside about 30 community members and religious leaders with Clergy and Laity United for Economic Justice, a faith-based advocacy group based near downtown. They shouted "Bring them back" and held a sign that read "Bring back the Fig 100."

[imraespace]

CHAPTER 11: MEETING YOU AGAIN.

JUST THE WAY THINGS GO || MEGUMI X READER

To you, it felt like only two days had past ever since you came back here but in reality, the weekend was here.

Your friends sometimes messaged you but during the school hours, they always disappeared, leaving you by yourself.

You stared up at your ceiling, recollecting your thoughts and thinking of ways to spend your Saturday.

Your aunt was out, leaving you to spend your morning with yourself.

A sigh escaped your lips as you finally got off your bed and made it in the bathroom. You got ready for the day then finally left the place.

──────────────

Ever since your homeroom teacher said those words "Make new friends", one person always comes to mind. At first you were hesitant, unsure of doing what your mind says but soon enough you will have to meet.

Without knowing, you subconsciously walked to the building passing persons by, some you may know, some you may not.

But what you did know was that when you feet finally stopped, your eyes was met with the one place in your mind.

The local hospital.

Sighing, you mentally slapped yourself but either way, you made it inside and told them the name.

And now here you are, infront of the room, shaking as a leaf

What if they don't like you anymore? Why did you even came here..

The more you stood there the more thoughts flew in but you managed to suck them up and gently opened the door.

As you opened it, the back of their head was the first thing you saw, knocking on the door to signal that you're now in their presence.

They head turned in your direction as their emotions flooded their face.

The first time in 2 years you finally saw your old best friend, Tsumiki Fushiguro.

You stood near the door as she got up from her bed, standing with shocked written all over her face.

She didn't know you were here, that you're finally back.

Slowly, you both walked closed to each other but she filled in the gap with a tight hug.

The hug you thought you would've never received again.

"Y/N? I didn't know you came back!" She exclaimed.

You didn't say anything, just returning her hug.

It felt nice to finally receive the somewhat warmth and love you left here, it may not be the one you we're longing for but still, it felt nice.

The hug was long lasting but soon she let go, asking you a bunch of questions.

"When did you came back? And why did Megumi tell me anything?" Confused was written all over her face.

"Well firstly, I came back last week.. and about Megumi, he isn't really happy to see me.." You mumbled.

"He isn't happy to see you? He was just here not to long ago I thought you both saw each other."

"He was here?" You asked yourself.

You looked up at Tsumiki.

"I think you're the only person who doesn't hate me in your family Tsu.." You started.

"I think it's just Megumi. I don't remember everything back then but I do remember that it wasn't us alone there, so I know it wasn't your fault! I told both him and my dad and literally only my dad believes me." She ranted.

She offered you to sit on he bed and finally you both began to catch up.

Atleast the person you hurt the most doesn't hate you.

──────────────

"Where were you?" A certain white haired man asked the boy.

Megumi looked up at him and rolled his eyes.

"Somewhere.." He mumbled.

Gojo looked at the other two as they both shared the same look.

Yuji wrapped his arms around his friend.

"It's okay you don't have to tell us megs!" He said as they all carried on, doing whatever they do.

──────────────

MASTERLIST | <-PREVIOUS // NEXT->

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(if not tagged, your profile didn't show up. sadly☹️)

──────────────

note: some happiness in y/n's life😊😊🤗🤗🤗

let's ignore that i forgot to add the persons in the taglist when I first uploaded this..

[brexiiton]

Dozens dead after blast in Pakistan at a rally celebrating birthday of Islam's prophet

By Associated Press, 6:38pm Sep 30, 2023

A powerful bomb exploded in a crowd of people celebrating the Prophet Muhammad's birthday in southwestern Pakistan on Friday, killing at least 52 people and wounding nearly 70 others, authorities said. It was one of the deadliest attacks in recent years.

TV footage and videos on social media showed an open area near a mosque strewn with the shoes of the dead and wounded. Some of the bodies had been covered with bedsheets. Residents and rescuers were seen rushing the wounded to hospitals, where a state of emergency had been declared and appeals were being issued for blood donations.

The bombing occurred in Mastung, a district in Baluchistan province, which has witnessed scores of attacks by insurgents. However, the militants normally target the security forces. The Pakistan Taliban have repeatedly said that they do not target places of worship or civilians.

TV footage and videos on social media showed an open area near a mosque strewn with the shoes of the dead and wounded. (AP)

Around 500 people had gathered for a procession from the mosque to celebrate the birth of the prophet, known as Mawlid an-Nabi, an occasion marked by rallies and the distribution of free meals.

Some of the wounded were in a critical condition, government administrator Atta Ullah said. Thirty bodies were taken to one hospital and 22 were counted at another, Abdul Rasheed, the District Health Officer in Mastung, said.

A senior police officer, Mohammad Nawaz, was among the dead, Ullah said. Officers were investigating whether the bombing was a suicide attack, he added.

Friday's bombing came days after authorities asked police to remain on maximum alert, saying militants could target rallies for Mawlid an-Nabi.

Also Friday, a blast ripped through a mosque located on the premises of a police station in Hangu, a district in the northwestern Khyber Pakhtunkhwa province, killing at least two people and wounding seven, said Shah Raz Khan, a local police officer.

He said the mud-brick mosque collapsed because of the impact of the blast and rescuers were pulling worshippers from the rubble. Police say it was not immediately clear what caused the blast.

A boy injured by the explosion receives treatment at a hospital in Mastung near Quetta, Pakistan. (AP)

No one claimed responsibility for the blast in Hangu, and the cause was unclear. About 40 people were praying at the mosque at the time, most of them police officers.

Pakistan's President Arif Alvi condemned the attacks and asked authorities to provide all possible assistance to the wounded and the victims' families.

In a statement, caretaker Interior Minister Sarfraz Bugti denounced the bombing, calling it a "heinous act" to target people in the Mawlid an-Nabi procession.

Youngsters in traditional dress take part in a ceremony celebrating the birthday of Islam's Prophet Muhammad, in Karachi, Pakistan. (AP)

The government had declared Friday a national holiday. President Alvi and caretaker Prime Minister Anwaarul-haq-Kakar in separate messages had called for unity and for people to adhere to the teachings of Islam's prophet.

No one immediately claimed responsibility for Friday's bombing, but Pakistani Taliban quickly distanced themselves from it. Known at Tehreek-e-Taliban, or TTP, the Pakistani Taliban is separate from the Afghan Taliban but closely allied to the group which seized power in neighbouring Afghanistan in August 2021 as US and NATO troops were in the final stages of their pullout from the country after 20 years of war.

The Islamic State group has claimed previous deadly attacks in Baluchistan and elsewhere.

Also Friday, the military said two soldiers were killed in a shootout with Pakistani Taliban after insurgents tried to sneak into southwestern district of Zhob in Baluchistan province. Three militants were killed in the exchange, a military statement said.

The gas-rich southwestern Baluchistan province at the border of Afghanistan and Iran has been the site of a low-level insurgency by Baluch nationalists for more than two decades. Baluch nationalists initially wanted a share of provincial resources, but they later launched an insurgency calling for independence.

Muslims chant religious slogans during a rally celebrating the birthday of Islam's Prophet Muhammad, in Rawalpindi, Pakistan. (AP)

Friday's bombing was one of the worst in Pakistan in the last decade. In 2014, 147 people, mostly schoolchildren, were killed in a Taliban attack on an army-run school in the northwestern city of Peshawar.

In February, more than 100 people, mostly policemen, died in a bombing at a mosque inside a high-security compound housing Peshawar police headquarters. In January, 74 people were killed in a bombing at a mosque in Peshawar. And in July, at least 54 people were killed when a suicide bomber dispatched by an Afghan branch of the Islamic State group targeted an election rally by a pro-Taliban party in northwest Pakistan.