#THE ONLY GIRL I EVER LOVED WAS ANDREW IN DRAG............

[brucequeensteen]

a pity she does not exist... a shame he's not a fag...

[myprincero]

twisted fate & lady luck

[avvm4dsxx]

ANDREW IN DRAAAAAGGGG!!! ANDREW IN DRAG

[glsneeg-enthusiast]

andrew in drag is theeee ethan/austin song to me. btw

[breathingsong]

a pity she does not exist a shame he’s not a fag!

[sparkling-ariaria]

Hogwarts Legacy fics I read and want to keep...

*Complete fem or non-specific reader insert fics* Upd: 27.09.2024

"You are everything. Everything. It’s true." by sebswebs - Sebastian x gf!Reader

Mon Amour by sebswebs - Sebastian x gf!Reader As their 7th year begins, Hogwarts has been chosen to host the Triwizard Tournament. Upon the arrival of the beautiful girls of Beauxbatons Academy, MC is feeling overly insecure before she has even had a chance to reunite with her boyfriend after the summer.

He's so in love by hufflepuffwitchhh - Ominis Gaunt x Reader Ominis is in love with you. Now, who's gonna tell him? Alternatively known as: ten times Sebastian knew Ominis was in love with you vs the first time Ominis knew he was in love with you.

Her touch by thenerdykneazle - Ominis Gaunt x fem!Reader Ominis had never been fond of being touched. Or, at least, he had few positive experiences with it. That changed with the arrival of the new fifth-year.

Catnap by pluvpluvpluv - Ominis Gaunt x gf!MC x Sebastian Sallow

Strained by ravenelyx - Ominis Gaunt x gf!Reader Exams have taken a toll on you and your health - especially your eyes. Thankfully, Ominis is there to take care of you.

I like you(r) by ravenelyx - Sebastian Sallow x Reader Sebastian likes a lot of things about you, like your sweet perfume... or your lips.

Cute little boyfriend moments headcanons by ashisgreedy - Garreth Weasley

Flowery Language by galaxiasgreen - Garreth Weasley x gf!Reader Garreth gets you flowers, and things go terribly wrong.

Scriptorium to Sepulcher (AO3 link) by RGKO Side story to "The Raven and the Snake" by choccymilky. Takes place after the scriptorium scene. Ominis is depressed about finding his aunt's remains and his two friends want to help him.

A Jeweled Promise by forbidden-armotentia - Ominis x gf!Reader Ominis gifts his girlfriend a necklace, which can only be unlocked with parseltongue.

Judge of character by sebastians-niffler - Sebastian x hufflepuff!Reader When professor Howin assigns a task on caring of a niffler, Sebastian has a bit of a hard time. That is, until you give him the confidence he had hidden all along.

Never have I ever by emptycauldron - Ominis x fem!Reader Ominis is dragged to a Gryffindor party, where MC teaches them all a Muggle drinking game.

HL Charas react to MC as a cat animagus by hogwartslegacyreactions2

Golden by btsbabe7 - Sebastian x Reader Watching the sunset within the grassland vivarium.

You Were The First by spaceyaceface - Ominis x f!Reader Ominis Gaunt has never known affection. He has never known how it felt to love---to be loved. She came and changed all of it.

Comfort drabble by bluerainshadows - Garreth x fem!Reader

You look better in green by fierymiasma - Sebastian x fem!Hufflepuff!Reader In which Sebastian sees the new transfer student wearing someone else’s scarf and proceeds to absolutely lose it.

Moonlight drabble by galaxiasgreen - Ominis x Reader In search of distraction from Ranrok's rebellion, you dance with Ominis in the Undercroft.

Now that I "see" you by huffleflufflefly - Ominis x Reader You came up with an idea to enchant a pair of glasses to help him see. You’ve tried quite a few times, but you felt this pair was the one!

Sleep by islayhawkin - Ominis x Reader At home Ominis had to sleep on the floor as a punishment so he still feels safest sleeping on the floor.

A moment of your time by applinsandoranges - Andrew Larson x fem!Reader Andrew has a certain way of grabbing MC's attention - and her affection. Old habits die hard, not that she'd ever want him to stop asking for her time.

Liquid Courage by forbidden-amortentia - Ominis x fem!Reader Ominis gets startled in potions class and accidentally grabs onto MC's thigh.

[seasirengirl]

LEO VALDEZ DATING HCS

pairing: leo valdez x reader (godly parent not specified)

a/n: sorry for the super duper slow updates, my life has been a mess🫶🏼

ೀ friends to lovers is a trope owned by leo valdez and no one can change my mind

ೀ he’s such a shameless flirt

ೀ nicknames in spanish.

ೀ i repeat

ೀ nicknames in spanish.

ೀ he’s such a fun person to be around

ೀ always cracking jokes and all that

ೀ but

ೀ hold up

ೀ he doesn’t crack jokes at times when you don’t feel like hearing them, even though he’s known for doing that to others, you’re his exception

ೀ you two went everywhere together

ೀ quest? together

ೀ spending nights at bunker 9? not without you

ೀ he felt guilty for making you stay there though

ೀ but then you started ranting about how much you loved staying there

ೀ and he just couldn’t say no to you

ೀ or your pretty face

ೀ but we all know that you didn’t really think bunker 9 was the most comfortable place to sleep in

ೀ you just wanted to stay with your repair boy

ೀ after being two idiots who were very much in love but would never admit it

ೀ your friends got sick of it

ೀ y’know what that meaaannssss

ೀ at first percy and annabeth started talking about it

ೀ apparently piper and jason also had discussed it before (mostly piper)

ೀ frank and hazel are just there yknow

ೀ chilling

ೀ with no clue about what’s going on

ೀ anyway

ೀ doing very couple-ish things all together

ೀ there were eight of you.

ೀ obviously meaning that

ೀ you and leo had to be dragged into all of that

ೀ which neither of you complained about

ೀ but you wouldn’t say it

ೀ going on carnival dates <3

ೀ well they weren’t technically dates for you and leo

ೀ but they felt like dates

ೀ the other six ditched you every second

ೀ and you two still managed to be clueless

ೀ smh

ೀ honestly thank the gods for piper

ೀ when you AND leo both found out about your feelings at the same time

ೀ you were both ranting to her

ೀ cause she’s the daughter of aphrodite

ೀ ykyk

ೀ and also a great friend

ೀ but she needed a break atp

ೀ hearing both of you yap about each other not knowing that the other feels the same

ೀ until one day she had ENOUGH

ೀ bro was tired fr

ೀ so she decided to make both of you a bit jelly

ೀ not a bit tbh, a lot

ೀ yk, telling leo that the new guy from cabin 7 was talking about asking you out

ೀ or telling you that one of her sisters were going to make a move on leo at the bonfire tonight

ೀ leo couldn’t let some guy try to make a move on his girl

ೀ and you couldn’t either

ೀ so

ೀ both of you decided to confess at the same time

ೀ leo walked up to you just as you were about to find him

ೀ “can we go somewhere private?”

ೀ such a simple sentence left you speechless, only managing a nod

ೀ “i don’t want you to go out with him” leo blurted out

ೀ “with who?” you asked, did you have a date you forgot about?

ೀ “andrew, the new guy from 7?”

ೀ “i’m not going on a date with him, oh wait- piper...”

ೀ silence. total silence.

ೀ “i have something to-“

ೀ “i have to tell y-“

ೀ you couldn’t help but laugh at that, “go ahead.”

ೀ“i would say ‘ladies first’, but i have to say this, ever since i stepped a foot in camp, i’ve had a crush on you, so will you do the honors of being my girl?”

ೀ “i’d love to.”

ೀ “so would it be okay if i-“

ೀ “shut up, valdez”

ೀ and he did shut up, because his tongue was too busy being down your throat

ೀ ok what.

ೀ anyway

ೀ after that night, your friends wished they never set you two up

ೀ they were just jealous that you two were a better couple than them

ೀ or that’s what you thought

ೀ leo was actually the best boyfriend you could ask for

ೀ he would make you the coolest gifts ever

ೀ any kind of jewellery a girl could dream of

ೀ he made it

ೀ flowers that never die, all yours

ೀ honestly you can’t recall a night that you haven’t slept without leo in winter

ೀ slept.

ೀ he kept you so warm when it was cold out

ೀ cause he’s your fireboy

ೀ he’s so touchy and always has to have his arm around you somehow

ೀ but he wouldn’t be much of a pda guy

ೀ especially it it makes you uncomfortable.

[the-healthy-human-mind]

To Me, From Me

Pairing: F! OC Evelyne “Snake” Gray x Kyle “Gaz” Garrick

CWs: Insecurities, ANGST with a happy ending, disassociation, poor self esteem, hints to abuse, mentions of pregnancy, slight pregnancy complication, Kyle is a sweetie, this is sad because I said so.

At 17, Evelyne never saw herself getting married, let alone having children of her own, but at 27, she cherishes every moment with her girls. She finally had the life she wished for, an amazing husband, her sisters by her side, a daughter, and a second child on the way. She didn’t ask for anything more, so why did she get thrown into this situation? What the fuck did she do to piss off God so bad that He did this to her?

Scarlette’s piercing cry breaks Evelyne out of her thoughts, turning her head to see Kyle comforting their daughter. Claire stands up slowly to go make a bottle for the girl, passing a worried glance at her, and then to the man sitting smugly in her living room. A man she never thought she’d see again, who abandoned her at 17, running off to god knows where. “Nellian, what have you done?”

“I reached out to him first, Ev, I swear! Its not his fault, he wanted to see you- he feels bad for not stopping what dad d-”

“Nellian,” Kyle’s voice broke through the young woman’s rant, “Go upstairs with Claire and Scar,”

“Uncle Ky please just-”

“Now,”

Nellian frowns, but heads for the stairs, Claire following behind her with Scarlette wiggling in her arms. Andrew sits there, calmly, eyes trained on Evelyne’s heavily pregnant stomach. His eyes flick to Kyle when the man comes up to sit next to her, turning his body to slightly block her from her brother’s view.

“Mars,” Andrew calls out, voice slightly raspier than before.

“Lorris,” the nickname rolls off her tongue easily despite her anxiety, as if she hasn’t not said it in 10 years. “You better have a good fucking reason to be here, Andrew. And you’ve got 10 seconds to make me believe your bullshit story.” Andrew scoffs at her husband, rolling his eyes. “Nellie had reached out, said she wanted to meet with me, so I did.” “Now,” Kyle leans his elbows on his knees, blocking Evelyne entirely from Andrew. “I know that’s bullshit, because you didn’t just meet with Nellian, you drove her back to my home, and walked through the fucking door like you paid the mortgage. Try again.”

Andrews leg bounces, a tick she will never forget of his, while glaring at Kyle. A wave of pain crashes through Evelyne’s body like lighting, causing her to inhale sharply. Her quick breath doesn’t go unnoticed, however, as Kyle immediately turns to her, brown eyes full of panic.

“Are you alright, love?”

Evelyn’s goes to nod, not wanting to cause a disturbance, but another wave of pain pulls a groan from her throat. It doesn’t feel like Braxton hicks, no, it feels exactly like when she went into labor with Scarlette. Kyle seems to notice her internal panic, standing up and grabbing Andrew roughly by the collar, dragging him to the front door. “If you ever show your ugly fucking mug here again, I’m putting a bullet between your eyes.” Kyle slams the door, rushing back to Evelyne, who is now surrounded by her three minions, meowing away at their mom.

“C’mon love, we’re going to the hospital.”

“But Scar,”

“Claire and Nel have her, we need to make sure you’re both okay.”

“Well,” the OBGYN takes off her gloves, “I don’t see any reason to panic, it looks like stress caused minor pre-term contractions, but you’re not dilated, so just make sure you’re resting.” She reassured them before smiling and saying her goodbyes.

Evelyne relaxes at that, squeezing Kyle’s hand as he rests his forehead against hers. They stay like that for a moment, before he brings his other hand down to her bare bump, thumb brushing against old scars.

If only 17 year old Evelyne could see her now, belly the size of a beach ball, married, and so in love. The brat would probably laugh her ass off in disbelief.

As Kyle pulls her shirt down for her and helps her sit up, Evelyne wonders if she could have ever lived without him. If she would still be here, or if she would be living life through a lens, only alive for the sake of her sisters. If she would still see color in this world.

This time, a harsh kick to Kyle’s hand on her belly breaks her out of her thoughts. She laughs at his look of offense from being kicked by his unborn daughter.

“Not even born yet and the little shit is already causing trouble, huh?”

[gravysside]

The only girl I'll ever love is Andrew in drag

I like the lineart more than I like my attempt at coloring, critique wanted ;-;

[springsteenicious]

been a while since I wrote a fic in one afternoon but the idea was so strong I couldn't do anything else until it was finished.

Summary: Victoria Von Hemen's debut show, inspired by Andrew in Drag by The Magnetic Fields. Mac is very confused. (Explicit)

A pity she does not exist A shame he's not a fag The only girl I've ever loved Was Andrew in drag

[brucequeensteen]

A PITY SHE DOES NOT EXIST A SHAME HES NOT A FAG THE ONLY GIRL I EVER LOVED IS ANDREW IN DRAG

[paintedwingz]

ITS A PITY SHE DOES NOT EXIST, A SHAME HES NOT A FAG, THE ONLY GIRL I EVER LOVED WAS ANDREW IN DRAG

[moon-alight]

Hii! Can I ask for a Nicholas drabble? Him wanting you to pay attention to him instead of the movie you are watching and his hands start getting all over you , please?

I need all of you to be a bit more obvious if you want me to write smut because I can't take hints. So, this is a fluff drabble... I hope this is what you wanted. If not, leave another ask and I'll deliver. :)

Attention - &Team Nicholas

Synopsis: You are watching a movie with your boyfriend but end up in a bit of a situation.

Warnings: fluff, attention whore Nicholas, afab reader, hints of smut but not really. I guess it's sort of like 16+ but don't expect too much. I really don't know how to explain this.

Word Count: 780

Masterlist

It is one of the only times you get the dorms to yourself. The boys are mainly all out for the day, visiting Lotte World together. You and Nicholas decided to stay home, finally getting a bit of time together and since both of you are too lazy to go out, you settled for a movie.

While everyone else had already watched Spiderman No Way Home, you hadn't. You were always busy but now, nothing was stopping you from seeing the three spiderman's come together on the screen. Well, one thing is stopping you.

"I have seen this seven times already." Nicholas groans, sitting back. It wasn't the first time he had been complaining during the 30 minutes the movie had been going on for. He has been working your system constantly.

"Well, I haven't." You reply, reaching for more popcorn. Nicholas decided to be a bit more patient seeing as you had wanted to watch this movie ever since it came out in theaters a year ago. But he just couldn't.

"Baby." He says softly, looking at you. Your attention is completely on the screen, so absorbed in the story already. "Baaaabyyyyy." He drags out dramatically but you don't budge. As if you don't even hear him. He leans a little closer and starts poking you with every word he says. "Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby--"

"Stop it, Nicholas." You reply, pushing his hands away. Your boyfriend sits back with his arms crossed over his chest and a big pout on his lips and you don't even spare him a glance. He's moody. Very moody. How dare you to ignore your precious, hard-working, amazingly talented, handsome boyfriend? He thinks.

"I know you love Spiderman but... I thought you'd love me more." He mumbles. He figures, if he plays this well enough, you would feel bad and give him all the attention in the world.

"Hey, if Peter Parker decides to show up at my front door one day, I'd definitely go with him." Well, that wasn't the answer he was expecting.

"WHAT?!" Nicholas shouts, you shush him, continuing to pay attention to the movie. "What do you mean you'd leave me? Don't you know how many girls would kill to be with me and you're not even in love with me anymore."

"Who said I'm not in love? I love you more than anything, you know that." You reply, matter-of-factly.

"I'm starting to doubt that right now." Nicholas mutters to himself while continuing to pout. Not even five minutes pass before he starts trashing. "BABYYYY!"

"Nico, please." You reply annoyed. A sudden smirk appears on his face. You had just given him the perfect idea. You will beg for him later... he's sure of it. After being together for 5 months, he definitely knows your body enough to make you aching for him with just some 'innocent' touches.

The movie goes on, you gasp when Andrew Garfield appears on the screen. You knew he's be in it but you're still so overwhelmed. Nicholas takes this oportunity to scoot a little closer to you, wrapping an arm around your waist. You figure he's finally over it and just wants to cuddle, oh how wrong you are.

When Tobey appears, you scream. A literal fan-girl scream. Again, Nicholas smirks. He can make you scream much louder in many different ways. His 'innocent' hand on your waist moves down a little, drawing figures on your clothed hips with his fingers. You cuddle into him more, not thinking anything of his touches until you feel his hand inch closer to your core.

His fingers start drawing figures on your thighs, and suddenly you're incapable of focusing on the movie and you become aware of the arousal that's building up inside of you and starts showing through your panties.

You know what he is doing but you won't let him win that easily. You waited a year to watch this movie, you're gonna finish it too. You look at the screen, trying your best to pay attention when you feel Nicholas' fingers brush your clothed clit for only a brief moment. You gasp softly, body tensing as your desire to want more grows.

"What's wrong, baby?" Nicholas asks innocently as if he isn't the one distracting you majorly right now. He leans closer, his lips right next to your ear. "You wanted to watch the movie, so keep watching it." And just like that, all his touches disappear and he sits back in the spot he sat before. You stare at him dumbfounded.

"Nico--"

"Just watch the movie, baby." He smirks as he says it, knowing what he has done. "Just watch the movie."

[capcavan]

Riko ship meta I could not spam the other day bc tumblr had stroke!

Riko/Renee Rinee

Renee would be first and only ever woman Riko is interested in, their relationship starts slow held back by Riko's inability to feel at ease in fox tower and distrust towards himself

Everyone labels the relationships as Renee taking in a pet project to fix while Riko is hungry for any sort of attention, only Kevin and Andrew see that it's beginning of something serious (if Riko will allow it to be) , because Andrew knows Renee and Kevin knows Riko

Renee can not cook meanwhile Riko's arm is broken and so he gets to teach her how to not fuck up pan cakes

Renee enjoys sparring with Riko, due to her past experience she does not feel comfortable with stronger men, knowing Rikos fighting style and knowing well that she could with with him in a fight calms down her anxieties, Riko is excellent boxer but when it comes to real fighting he has no chance against her.

in future when she's more comfortable and trusting of him she will teach him to better defend himself

She sees him as doberman with cropped tail and ears, going through life not understanding he had been mutilated.

Riko is not prepared for Renee to finish collage much sooner than he would the separation is extremely hard on him

Girl and boy, Riko is stay at home boywife, Renee plays exy for few seasons before retiring to enjoy home life. (i have way too many different head cannons about Riko's parenting and his issues with parenting sent asks])

Riko/Kevin

they are soulmates they are always together no matter of au or story progression they always love each other in some way

Kevin dislikes seeing Riko move on and work on getting better, he is scared that there will be no place for Kevin beside new "fixed" Riko

Kevin is scared of future, and tends to romanticize their time at the nest finding comfort in time where he was the centre of Rikos universe

Riko is the one to drag Kevin to start therapy - they have group sessions

Riko gets king chess piece tattooed on ring finger , Kevin gets a cown

Size kink 100%, Riko does not realise Kevin likes how much shorter Riko is

Riko/Jean

very unhealthy but stabilizing with time reltionship

Riko seeks punishment for bad things he committed , and Jean is comfortable to provide them

Jean takes dominant role between the two Riko willingly gives everything away to him, he's too scared to be left alone

Jean knows broken bones hurt, but the tender pain of emotional distress is unmatched , he will make Riko taste both

Jean does not feel any pity for Riko, Riko does not want any pity

but after some times passes hurting is not as relieving any more and its time to care

Riko/Jeremy

Jeremy is one of not many people Riko is actually afraid (of course he is drawn to him)

Jeremy is son of politician and in the know about Moriyamas activities

Jeremy likes teasing Riko about his poor social status [being just moriyama family commodity rather than actual part of the power]

Riko entertains him mainly hoping the relationship might be useful for him in future

Riko/Nathaniel

Nathaniel is little sadist he got it after his daddy, he loves using Riko as his canvas for cuts and scarification, most days he spends time modifying Rikos skin or tending to old cuts

Riko can't deny things to Nathaniel

Riko/Nicky

Nicky is very active and always looking for partners whatever or not on the list or with Erik's approval

Riko enjoys teasing him

They really are not together, it's just a lot of teasing and Nicky wanting to get laid and everyone around making it into meme

Riko/Jack -Jack wants to be to Riko what Riko was to Kevin in nest

Riko/Andrew

andrew is one of people who are very honest towards riko [openly tell him to fuck off] riko takes comfort in someone who is not trying to be nice/pity full towards him, he needs people to hold him accountable for things he done

riko learn to play the game by andrews rules not even interacting with andrew but seeing the way andrew interact with everyone, any time someone makes mistake riko sees? he uses it as occasion to never make this mistake himself

andrew is not amused, not mad either, there is some pleasure in knowing that someone is tailoring their personality to match all of his needs

andrew is the only person able to handle riko physically and set hard boundaries with him

after all the training he put into this dog he refuses to let anyone else have it

Wymack/Riko

daddy issues

kevins daddy

authority and praise

I'm insane about them

Aaron/Riko

aaron is cute smart and pretty and likes being told so, he also looks extremely good next to renee so that's perfect ot3

Size kink now Riko understands why Kevin thought him being short is hot

Riko/Ravens

Ravens love riko and idolize him

they see riko as one of them , left behind abandoned good only for one thing- exy

the difference is unlike them riko does not realise this

thanks to that he can do something they can not - dream

and they love being close to that dream

Riko/Seth

seth befriends riko to piss off other foxes

seth dates riko to piss of kevin day

seth has many siblings his big brother sense are tingling and riko loves the attention

they are fucking assholes idiots and troublemakers

weed and alcohol

Riko/Allison

that is planned for badger in fox den I have no clue yet how this will work but I have warm feelings

[denimbex1986]

'Paul Mescal, Andrew Scott, Barry Keoghan, Cillian Murphy, Niall Horan, Ayo Edibiri… the list goes on. In August of 2023, ELLE Magazine declared it was ‘Hot Irish Guy Summer’. Raw sex appeal was never our strong point, so how have these pale, lanky men become heartthrobs and Oscar darlings? The answer lies in Ireland’s deeply religious history and how Catholicism has traditionally demonised sexuality. This has resulted in a repressed, guilt-ridden people, who truly have no idea how to act under the spotlight.

The myriad of media which sparked the thirst for these Hibernian Heartthrobs, I believe can be traced to the April 2019 release of Season Two of Fleabag, by Phoebe Waller-Bridge. Co-starring Andrew Scott as the cool, sweary, g-and-t drinking, incredibly hot Hot Priest — the character is only credited as ‘Priest’, the internet added the ‘Hot’ — the popularity of the show peaked during lockdown. This was followed by the TV adaptation of Normal People, Sally Rooney’s 2018 novel; the epitome of the sad-girl-lit-fic genre, imbued with observations of Irish struggles with intimacy and communication. Paul Mescal and Daisy Edgar Jones bring electrifying, tender chemistry to the screen, and Mescal embodied Connell Waldron perfectly (melancholy, anxious and repressed). And, in June of 2020, Paul Mescal was photographed on the streets of Dublin carrying a beer, a packet of chips, wearing the shortest GAA shorts ever seen...

Like the well-loved Australian pastime of ribbing your loved ones, Irish affection is expressed similarly. When an Irish person loves you, they will air your dirtiest laundry and prey on your deepest insecurities to procure a laugh. Why do you think people keep bringing up that sausage advertisement Paul Mescal did? Even our own Irish Times recently said “…looking at the Irish artists who have been bothering the shortlists for Oscars, Bookers, Emmys, and Brit awards and seeing some of the innovation happening at home, there are reasons to remain hopeful.” Even in a national paper, in an article which discusses the need for funding in the arts and the richness of Irish talent, we can’t help but feel like a bother!

So, what’s the connection to the recent explosion of Irish culture? Hollywood — Americans — love Irish people. As they cling to whatever tentative Irish heritage they possess, the appreciation/appropriation of Irish culture by Americans is oh-so common. Ayo Edebiri joked in an interview about playing the donkey in The Banshees of Inisherin, which led to the internet backing her up and ‘confirming’ her Irishness. The joke has spiralled, and the actress regularly discusses her “Irish heritage”, even shouting out various counties on the red carpet of the Emmys. I believe these bashful, sarcastic, socially awkward, painfully shy celebrities are a refreshing alternative to the overly sincere Americans or traditional, stiff, and polite British who dominate silver screens. They’ve still got a cute accent, but without the colonial baggage an English sweetheart would carry. The vulnerability, the lack of fake tan, the gappy teeth; these actors are even more attractive for how ‘not Hollywood’ they are.

The rise of the ultra-private, introverted celebrity has coincided with this Hibernophilic phenomenon. Cillian Murphy epitomises this; we saw him being dragged around during the Awards Season/Barbenheimer press mania, and it is clear that he despises it. His Oppenheimer co-star, Emily Blunt, said “He is the world’s best actor and the world’s worst celebrity”. The girlies’ online delight over footage of him zoning out in interviews, stuttering at journalists, and asking what a meme is. He has no social media presence and lives a very private life in Dublin City. It seems his offline life, his introversion, only further incenses his admirers. Celebrities are retreating from social media for their own wellbeing, yet fans continue to lust after them in spite of this...

Why are we so obsessed with these men who are clearly so uncomfortable? Nothing is more attractive than something you can’t have; that’s what makes the Hot Priest so hot! That’s why private or non-existent Instagram accounts are so desirable. These men are vulnerable, honest, and embarrassed. Hot, hot, and hot. We want them to be a little nervous, a little objectified. They don’t want us looking at them! It’s fun, right? And really, after all the money for acting school or the Trinity College drama course, surely, they should’ve expected this?

This year, a BBC reporter asked Andrew Scott about Barry Keoghan’s use of prosthetics for the nude dance scene at the end of Saltburn, asking Scott, “How well do you know him?”Scott is visibly uncomfortable, and laughs, waving the reporter off, and the internet went nuts. People were horrified, and rightly so. While many of their works include erotic or nude scenes, the treatment of intimacy in Irish media is incredibly delicate. Even in a camp film like Saltburn, Keoghan’s character’s nakedness at the end of the film is a symbol of Oliver’s freedom. He’s won; he can do whatever he likes in this, his mansion. In Fleabag, when she and the priest finallysleep together, there is a spectacular moment where Phoebe Waller-Bridge looks to the camera, and pushes the lens down — we aren’t allowed to see this moment. It’s too important. Purity culture in Ireland has made sex an especially secret, dirty thing. When Irish people are sexual on screen, there is a cultural barrier they must cross to access this vulnerability. Cultural insensitivity to this, in the form of this extreme obsession and objectification, compounds this issue. This is why the bawdy jokes about being railed by priests or dangling silver chains leave a bitter taste in my mouth.'

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

By The Shore Of The Lake

Everything ends. Even summer. Especially summer.

Everything always ends and Marjorie Andrews knows this intimately. It’s why she can’t be excited about moving into the lakehouse the way everyone else is. It’s been in the family for years, used only for reunions and now she’s moving in permanently, and she loves it, but she knows it’s not really permanent. Nothing ever is.

She’s kicking her feet over the edge of the lake, toes dragging through the water as she sits in jeans and t-shirt on the floating dock, when she hears the gravel crunch as functional as a doorbell. A half empty glass of iced tea is abandoned on the dock and possibly dumped wholesale into the lake when she stands and runs, with the careful balance and blind direction of someone who’s crossed this path a hundred times before, to the driveway. If anything is home, this is.

Her mom is shouting from inside, but Marjorie only cares about the car now parked in front of the garage and the people coming out of it. Her aunt and uncle smile warmly but her cousin, blonde curls falling around her shoulders, is all Marjorie can see.

“Marjorie!” They both cry at the same time, falling into the type of hug that can only be had between girls who don’t see each other often enough.

There are two too many duplicate names in their family. The two Marjories, auburn Andrews and blonde Taylor, as well as the first Marjorie’s father and brother’s shared name of Zachary.

Marjorie Taylor is from the city and has lived there her entire life, in the same apartment since she was born. Marjorie Andrews isn’t jealous of this, just puzzled by it; she’s never known anything but moving every few years, military deployments and weeks of missing her dad and wondering where they would land next. Permanence may as well be a foreign word to her, which means that she and her favorite cousin have a language barrier. Their Rosetta stone is this house, where they’ve seen each other every summer since they were babies. If there’s anywhere they’ve grown up, it’s here.

“I can’t believe you live here now,” Marjorie Taylor says, arm in arm with her namesake as they walk into the house ahead of her parents. “The lakehouse has become a lake home!”

Marjorie Andrews laughs. It’s always like this. Even if they haven’t talked in months, the moment they meet again it’s as if they’re picking up a conversation that never really stopped. “Something like that,” she agrees with a pointed look at the boxes still stacked in the front hall, things that haven’t been put away yet. “Mama, they’re here!” She shouts into the kitchen.

Emilia Andrews leans out into the entryway with her dark brown hair in a frazzled ponytail and a patchwork apron over her clothes. “Good thing, dinner will be ready in about half an hour,” she says. “How was the drive?”

Aunt Maud shrugs. “Nothing to write home about.” She follows Emilia back into the kitchen, leaving her husband to shoot the girls a quizzical raised eyebrow.

Auburn Marjorie nods into the family room, down the hall and to the right of the kitchen. “Grandma and Papa are in there, last I know,” she says, and Uncle Anthony takes off to greet his in-laws. This leaves the Marjories to their own devices in the front hall, still arm in arm.

“I need to see you room,” says Marjorie Taylor, and without hesitation or another word Andrews turns and pulls her up the stairs. They go as fast as they can as an unofficial three-legged race without tripping. “Which one is yours?”

The first Marjorie grins. “The lavender room,” she says, “The one you and I always share!” She makes it to the landing and turns down the hall, past what they call the peach room, where Zach is laying in his bed with headphones on and a notebook in hand, and throws open the next door.

Her room is so named for its pale purple walls, now turned golden by the afternoon sunlight coming in through the open window on the far wall. Where there used to be matching twin beds taking up most of the floor space, there’s now a wooden loft bed with space to set a mattress up beneath it and beside the desk tucked away in the corner. In the opposite corner is a soft disc chair, orange and fuzzy, beside a bookshelf stacked on top of a dresser. There are still boxes in the free spaces, but the room is more lived in than it’s been in a long while.

“You made it so cute!” Marjorie says, bouncing up and down on her toes. “I love it!”

Marjorie, who lives in this room for now, points with her foot at the dresser. “There’s space in the dresser for you if you want, and we can set up your bed after dinner.”

“Cool,” Marjorie Taylor says. “Is it weird changing everything around here?” She asks while reaching up to pull her hair into a ponytail.

“A little,” Marjorie says. “Everything changes, I guess.” She pretends like she doesn’t hate that. This is her last summer before she has to choose if she’s going to college or where. Blonde Marjorie is already enrolled for this year’s fall semester and they haven’t really talked about it, she just heard it from her mom. It’s probably their last summer together, and they need to hold onto that even if so much is changing, even the layout and life of the lavender room. Everything changes. Everything ends. Sometime, they should have known, this will too.