#THAT SHIT IS 10 YEARS OLD NO ONE IS GONNA BUY IT ON FULL PRICE | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

beardedmrbean · 1 year ago

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Hey it me, zoomer Huey, I saw the post saying about the young gamers retro revival

But how retro because this book..

https://www.tumblr.com/gsirvitor/742534236498804736

Also yes people halo is going to be 23 this fall so it’s a retro game

Yes, don’t have to deal with horrific live service and micro transactions but the thing is….economic reasons

Like I been getting into kingdoms hearts and final fantasy….but I was a Xbox player so they are new ports in the ecosystem

And like I said, AC red will probably be a huge entry point for a lot of new fans. So it very likely they will be curious what the game Easter eggs are about so I will gladly help them get say get the Ezio Collection if the European Templars have dialogue mentioning they don’t want another Borgia fiasco since the game take places in the 1580’s-90’s and during this time many Templars went to the new world or other places to escape the “Dark Age” of the Templars order where it’s was about gaining power for selfish reasons rather further their causes

And about retro games, um…the same way a adult might want to watch old classic movies

Now I watched Fox’s miracle of 34th street a couple of years ago on Disney plus (actually I often use these streaming services to watch old shit like the muppet show) despite being at my depress state, I couldn’t help but smile at the Santa in it

It like for me, I found the Santa that inspired the ones your generation, my generation, and all those in between the Santa we had when we were kids. I’m glad the actor got the Oscar. And I’m more glad Hollywood graveyard help find his lost vase and people came to celebrate the actor new home. With him Unknowingly inspired the Christmas magic we love

Sorry using that as example

Also a lot of young gamers….were often too poor, too young, didn’t have enough resources when these old games came out. So we are interested in what these games that older gamers talk about even if we don’t have the nostalgia for it

Like Xbox Backwards Compatibility library….can someone please make a deal to bring the one transformers or marvel games back on it? Anyways, I’m 24 now, so there a lot of old 360 and og Xbox games I didn’t okay that I use bc for

And modern gaming, ugh feel like it intentionally designed for Twitch streamers and YouTuber gamers. Ugh halo infinite mp made just drop it all together

Oh gaming companies, a lot of modern gamers have JOBS so we might invest in a 1 or 2 live service games. Hell ac red might have a 3-4 live services era (ac Valhalla had 2 years of support) but I’m mostly invested in single player games

Well I’m autistic and I work 10 hour and 4 days a week work schedule. I am not interested dealing with try hards

Like I don’t understand this shock? Ac red is dead ass the only triple a gaming I’m probably going to be paying at launch at full price while the upcoming Star Wars game I’m probably going to get on sale

I feel like people are so focus on young people who refuse to consume pre 2012 media. There are those with a mentality that can stand old shit.

Hey it me, zoomer Huey, I saw the post saying about the young gamers retro revival But how retro because this book. gsirvitor/742534236498804736 Also yes people halo is going to be 23 this fall so it’s a retro game

I think the first post your talking about was one I put up, I go with most anything PS2 on down for consoles, some PS2 aren't really "retro" but the divide for me is mostly based on hotfixes and micro-transactions so like Sims2 is the right age but i shift round on the retro bit since you could buy skins and such still gonna be retro I think.

Online games you could play for free online are retro too, but everyone will define it in their own way too so no hard and fast rules for me.

Like I been getting into kingdoms hearts and final fantasy….but I was a Xbox player so they are new ports in the ecosystem And like I said, AC red will probably be a huge entry point for a lot of new fans. So it very likely they will be curious what the game Easter eggs are about......... And about retro games, um…the same way a adult might want to watch old classic movies

Classic and retro work together in tandem a lot, there is a difference but I don't want to tangent too far into that.

Watch some Mr Rogers, it's a soothing balm on depression, won't make it go away but at the end of a episode or two you'll feel loved, man you've never met in your life but you know he loved you, just the way you are.

Nostalgia isn't required for retro, good games are good games.

If I'd had the money to get one of the first gen PS3's I'd have gotten one since they were built to still run PS1&2 games as well, once they took that away I had no desire to get the thing. Wii was great because you had the Wii shop for the older games and it also played GC games, Wii shop games weren't too pricey either.

And modern gaming, ugh feel like it intentionally designed for Twitch streamers and YouTuber gamers. Ugh halo infinite mp made just drop it all together

I've noticed that with some, they dial back the graphics and all that good stuff so they stream well, or at least leave the option of that. I figure as long as everyone is happy.

That's really all I do, even when battle net was going strong I still didn't sign up for D2 on there except rarely.

Blizard had it right with World of Warcraft, at least at one point. The were selling the game disc for like $5 with a 2 week subscription make their money in the long game, not sure if anyone is doing that kind of thing anymore but they should be.

I feel like people are so focus on young people who refuse to consume pre 2012 media. There are those with a mentality that can stand old shit.

I love seeing people get into the games and stuff I enjoyed when I was younger, watching through the X-Files with a friend who's never seen it before and it's great seeing it through the eyes of someone who hasn't watched it.

Same with nerding out about games, as you've seen me do with FFVI here previously.

Most people that matter feel the same, so don't worry about any haters, they aren't worth your time or thought.

#zoomer huey anon

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kay-oc-rambles · 2 years ago

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Rethinking the Cas x Harvey time loop AU bc I just unlocked Rasmodius's spell book thing in game & was reminded of that expensive fucking clock & if you know me, you know I love clocks. Also maybe instead of having it as an AU, it can be a whole story arc (not that I'm actually writing a fic of this, I just figured why not have it be part of Cas's canon).

Also I read this fic last night that doesn't technically mention the clock itself, but rather as a spell that Rasmodius casts & I think Cas would also be able to convince ol' Razzy to give her a discount on it.

Also also, this turned out SUPER long because I went a little more in depth than I originally intended.

(Sidenote that I'm considering starting a fresh file for Cas to help nail down the timeline for her story)

If you've read/watched D. Gray-Man, Miranda Lotto is my favorite character & I might have this AU take some inspiration from the Rewinding Town arc in that maybe the curse doesn't just make Cas relive the move to the farm over & over, but make it so that outside the town, time goes on normally.

So anyway, Cas & Harvey are already dating by the time Rasmodius asks Cas to go get the ink for him. She manages to do it without running into his ex (who I think I'm gonna call Esmerelda). He grants her access to one of his spell books. She of course looks through it immediately. The Junimo Hut could be nice (especially since she kinda misses seeing them around the Community Center). She doesn't mind making warp totems & would probably still use them if she had the obelisks (sometimes you're on the mountain & are like "shit, I needed to go to the beach", having a big ass obelisk on the farm is less convenient than having a few little totems on hand).

The clock fascinates her. "You can really make something like that?" She asks. He says "For the right price" and points to the listed price. She nearly chokes.

"Seriously? I mean, I get that you're essentially stopping time for like, specific things on the farm, but ten million??? It would take YEARS for me to save up that much money!"

She manages to talk him down to 100,000 gold, 100 solar & void essences each, 10 iridium bars, 5 prismatic jellies, and 100 gold bars.

It takes her a couple of weeks to get it all together but it's winter so she has a greenhouse full of ancient fruit plants, a few silos full of hay, and plenty of time to go into the mines. At some point during this though is when she realizes she wants to marry Harvey so she gets Rasmodius's help in making a rain totem that guarantees the following day will rain. (Upon looking at the wiki I guess it can technically be used in the winter but I like the idea of her having to wait a little, build up some anticipation, y'know?)

The gold clock gets made on the last day of Winter, when she also uses the rain totem. The following day, Cas does the whole thing where she shoots out of bed and barely remembers to throw on some proper clothes before she gets a totem out of her bag & warps to the beach to buy a mermaid pendant off of the old mariner. She runs over to the clinic (in the rain, she didn't even grab an umbrella or raincoat). It's not open yet & she left her phone, keys, & bag at home. She considers whether she should run home to grab her keys, or just hope Harvey is awake to hear her banging on the door (and that Pierre doesn't complain about hearing her battering down the clinic door at 7 in the morning).

When Harvey wakes up to hear the banging he rushes down thinking that there's an emergency (he wonders if Cas spent the previous night in the mines & was once again found passed out & injured, even though she swears up & down that she's more careful than she used to be & it's been a while since it happened). He opens the front door to find her standing there soaking wet and grinning from ear to ear.

"Are you okay-" he starts but Cas leaps forward to kiss him, knocking him a step back & soaking the front of his pajamas. When they part, Cas looks at him and she planned to just ask him straight away but she's just lovestruck and can't seem to get the words out at first. He asks what's going on, did something happen? She shakes her head, still grinning, and slowly opens up her hand that had been holding the pendant the whole time (it's a miracle she didn't drop it or crush it when she lept into his arms).

"Doctor Harvey Emerson, will you marry me?"

Of course he says yes, they kiss again. Harvey says something about Cas still dripping water on the clinic floor and urges her up into the apartment to take a warm shower (she didn't even realize how much she was shivering until he pointed it out) and dry off.

If Cas had it her way, they'd go have Lewis marry them that day, but Harvey convinces her to at least take a couple days to plan the wedding.

(It comes up that Cas doesn't really have any relatives to invite; she has no siblings or cousins, she never knew her father and her mother dying is part of what motivated her to quit Joja, which had basically taken up her whole life so she didn't really have any friends while working there.)

Meanwhile, Esmerelda is cooking up a plan. Her henchman told her what happened (to which she responded by turning him into a void chicken). She spies on Cas and Stardrop Farm, sees the gold clock and Cas planning the wedding with Harvey.

The day of the wedding, everybody including Rasmodius (who walks Cas down the aisle) in attendance, Esmerelda steals the gold clock to take back to her home and use it as the medium for a time loop curse. By the time Cas and Harvey come home it's been a long day and they don't notice that the clock is missing.

The next morning, everybody wakes up and it's the first day of spring, the first year Cas moved to the valley.

Cas wakes up at the bus stop with her bags, more confused than she's ever been in her life.

The first thing she does after making Robin think she's absolutely insane is go to Rasmodius's tower, but it's locked. Despite her pounding on the door hollering for him to open it, he doesn't answer. She decides to go into town, and when she comes across Lewis, he takes her to the community center. She's relieved when she finds that she can still read the golden scroll.

She heads to the clinic. Part of her knows that since so far no one seems to remember her, it's unlikely that Harvey will, but she hopes.

And he doesn't.

"It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Harvey, the local doctor. I perform regular check-ups and medical procedures for all the residents of Pelican Town. It's rewarding work. I hope you'll find your own work equally rewarding, in time." He says, just like the first time she met him. Her heart drops. She looks so suddenly pained that it concerns Harvey but she just tells him "I'm fine, it was... it was nice meeting you too" and leaves, heading back to the farm & plopping facedown on her bed. It's barely noon and she's already exhausted. She wonders if this is all a nightmare, or worse, that the past couple years were only a dream.

Ever the busy body though, she can't just lay around moping all day so she gets up and starts planting the parsnip seeds Lewis gave her. By the time she's done tilling and planting them it's close to 4 and she has no food. She drags herself into town to visit the saloon so she can finally eat for the first time that day. On her way home she forages a bit so she has something to eat the next morning.

When she receives Rasmodius's letter the next day, she rushes to water the parsnips and head out to the tower.

There's the whole thing where she tries to tell him that something is wrong, she's lived on Stardop Farm for a couple years but the day after she married Harvey she woke up and the town was back to day 1. He thinks she's fucking insane and when she starts getting riled up he straight up teleports her out of the tower & locks the door.

It takes a few days before Cas resigns herself to the belief that everything before was just a dream. It felt so real, more vivid than any other dream, but she doesn't have much of a choice. Things go on like normal but with a dull ache underlying every interaction with the people she came to know as dear friends. She falls in love with Harvey all over again. This time she marries him before completing the Community Center (before Rasmodius thinks to have her steal the magic ink). She lives through the happiest day of her life for the second time... and wake up the next morning at the bus stop.

She tries not to freak Robin out this time. She tries to act normal. Plants the parsnips, heads into town, visits the Community Center, stops by the saloon to pick up some food. On her way home, she overhears Jodi talking about how surprised she is that Kent is home so much earlier than expected. He was acting weird, but she figures it's just because of the war. Given a spark of hope that *somebody* remembers the previous years, she visits 1 Willow Lane.

Kent, having not been anywhere near the valley when Cas first moved in, is apparently immune to the time loop induced amnesia affecting the rest of the town. Like Cas, the first time it happened he thought it was a fluke, just his war traumatized brain playing tricks on him, but this time, one day he's attending Cas & Harvey's wedding in the middle of fall and the next is the first day of spring. After some convincing, he agrees to go with her to the wizard's tower tomorrow. Hopefully, with Kent, they can convince Rasmodius that something really weird is happening.

Cas is much calmer meeting Rasmodius this time and in addition to Kent's testimony, Cas tells Rasmodius everything she knows about him and the rest of the town (at this point she has the Community Center bundles memorized), including Esmerelda having his magic ink.

Rasmodius isn't quite sure what to make of it all, but Cas seems genuine so he agrees to look into it. They come to the conclusion that it is no coincidence that both resets happened right after Cas married Harvey, and if Cas really did sneak into Esmerelda's home then it makes sense that it was caused by Esmerelda & that Cas is the focus of the curse.

(Kent finds all the magic talk to be confusing and overwhelming, so the trio agrees that while Cas will keep him in the loop, he should focus on reconnecting with his family while Cas helps Rasmodius figure out how to break the curse)

It is also agreed that until it's broken, Cas cannot marry Harvey. Despite this, Cas goes home that night filled with hope that with Rasmodius on her side everything will be back to normal in no time.

It takes some time, a lot of trial & error, before Rasmodius comes to the conclusion that they have no choice but to confront Esmerelda.

Rasmodius insists that he do it alone, as who knows what Esmerelda will do to Cas.

Cas also figures that they're close enough to breaking the curse that she can at least give Harvey a bouquet.

At Esmerelda's home, she & Rasmodius have a confrontation that escalates pretty quickly. Ras also notices the gold clock. Just when Rasmodius thinks he has Esmerelda cornered, she forces a reset.

Cas wakes up at the bus stop. She throws her bags and kicks her luggage in frustration. She's crying when Robin comes up to take her to the farm. She tells Robin that things just haven't been going well for her lately and she didn't get much rest last night.

She goes through what is becoming a routine: parsnips, Community Center, Kent. She tells Kent that she isn't sure what happened, she didn't marry Harvey yesterday but she did give him a bouquet. She tells him that Rasmodius went to confront Esmerelda, something probably happened. Once again they go to the tower the next day to tell him what's going on.

I'm kinda running out of steam so I'm gonna try to wrap this up.

At some point, whether it's in the current loop or if it takes another reset or two, they figure out that the clock is the medium and they need to both kill Esmerelda AND destroy the clock, but Rasmodius & Cas both have to be present to destroy it (because Rasmodius made the clock, and not only was it made for Cas but the curse is centered on her).

Also at some point in one of the loops, Cas got the bus repaired and found that time outside of the valley has gone on normally. Sandy & Mr. Qi had been wondering why they hadn't seen Cas in quite a while, but when Mr. Qi tried to visit, something prevented him from entering the town. Word has spread around that something is up with the town because the merchants that come around for special events have been thrown way off schedule.

Anyway, the curse gets broken, and all the memories from the loops come rushing back to the citizens of Pelican Town & time catches up with the rest of the world (causing a mass migraine event & ruining all of Cas's crops).

Cas & Harvey get married & live happily ever after, the end.

#cas #sdv oc #fan oc #all details are of course subject to change #don't ask why i made harvey's last name be emerson. i like how in the Case History fics his surname is Greenwood but i didn't wanna copy #& for some reason I think Emerson suits him.

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deaderisbetter13 · 6 months ago

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OOOH YAY I LOVE THIS SHIT

Answers below the cut 💖

•First Living Dead Doll?

13th anniversary Posey, followed by 13th anniversary Sin! I got them when I was 10 so they're pretty roughed up now lmao.

•How did you first learn of LDDS?

It's honestly like a scene from a movie or book. I was in a comic book/old toys store with my dad and brother off the side of the road. I don't remember exactly how old I was but series 21 came out around that time so I'm guessing it was around 2011 or 2012. Hanging under the counter were some LDD minis! I fixated on squeak and BEGGED my dad to have her. He said no and I put her back but when we got back to the car i googled her on my dad's Ipad. The best I can describe the feeling I had when first seeing the full squeak doll is literally falling in love. They became one of my longest held special interests throughout my late childhood and teens and I still love them so much. I'm so delighted to have discovered them.

•Favorite LDD you own?

Ahhh don't make me choose!!! It's a hard split but I'm gonna have to pick Either Squeak or Butcher Boop from the main like. Toy soldier from the exclusives. Either Posey or Eggzorcist form the 20th anniversary set. And Res jack the ripper or Res Lizzie from my resurrection dolls. I seriously can't choose! I love so many of them!!

•Your dream LDD?

Resurrection Frozen Charlotte or Fairy Fae. They're both wonderful in their own ways but those two call to me specifically.

•Which LDD did you pay the most for?

Ah fuck I don't remember... I think it was my resurrection Jack the Ripper Doll which was a bit over 155 usd.

•Which LDD did you pay the least for?

Cause I was a kid when they were being sold and got them in store- probably my 13th Posey and Sin.

•Is there a doll you ended up liking a lot more than you initially thought you would?

My interest in certain dolls has waned and waxed over the years, but my attachment to Butcher Boop was a little more surprising tbh. She's just so cute!!

•Is there a LDD you regret getting?

Nope! I like a VAST majority of the dolls so I'm happy to get them- I am however disappointed at the state of my Morgana. She's lost bits of her clothes and it makes me sad :(

•Do you own a rare LDD or one that has shot up in price?

Butcher Boop- though a LOT of the dolls have shot up as of late.

•Do you pair up any dolls in your mind? (Shipping or otherwise)

Omg so many! But out of my personal collection I do put my ships together. Currently I have: Hook x Thump Gluttony x Greed Ava x Roxie Judas x Jacob Res! Jack the Ripper x Res! Lizzie Borden Carotte x Maitre And Squeak x Pumpkin if I'm counting my minis Though I have far, far more ships :P

•Do you display them in box or out of box?

Out of the box- I prefer to show off accessories!

•If you buy them second hand do they have to come with the box, death certificate, and accessories? Or are you fine with just the doll?

Accessories are a must- I could maybe do without the death certificate and chipboard but I prefer to have them too. Box isn't needed.

•Own any in bad condition? Have any that came second hand that you had to fix up?

Right now I have 2 dolls and 1 blind box figure that are super fucked up. As I mentioned before My 13th anniversary Sin and Posey were obtained when I was little so they're in rough shape. My blind box bloody Eggzorcist is super fucked up because her flocking got stripped and she got stains. I plan to paint over areas of damage on her and paint on new blood spots eventually. I might even re-flock over her damage. My Morgana has a broken dress (One of her flowers fell off to god knows where.) and missing hairties. Thump Is missing a button, Hook's hook broke after the took a tumble form the shelf, though I have since fixed it and painted over the break. My Evangeline also lost her hairtie but I've kept her bow glued to a regular hairtie. Other dolls are stained or otherwise discolored but I can't fix that so I'm living with it.

•How many LDDs do you own?

I have 47 regular dolls, 2 minis, 14 blind box figures, the resurrection 10 card sets and pin set, the sweet tooth pin, the series 34 pin, and an eggzorcist plushie! I plan on more.

•Opinion on the ‘Presents’ dolls?

I like them! I just wish they weren't the only dolls besides the huge expensive ones being put out right now.

•Do you have any characters you’d like to see as a LDD one day?

Since I'm currently obsessed with 'House of Wax' (2005) then definitely the Sinclairs. I also hope to see a Candyman doll or inspired one! Dementia would be cool to see as a full doll too!

•Opinion on the new LDDS that can bend their arms and legs?

Cool! But very expensive and don't seem my style for collecting. I am excited for Posey though ngl.

•Which doll(s) would you like to see get a resurrection?

I'd KILL for a resurrection Vincent Vaude, Macumba, or Hook. Seriously WHERE is res Macumba??? The rest of series 4 is already done! I'm also surprised Eggy doesn't technically have a res doll yet.

•Least favorite LDD you’ve seen?

Milu... girl they fucked you up SO BAD. Especially her color variant it's so fucking ugly.

•Have you seen LDDs for sale irl?

Yes! Mostly when I was younger but my friends have taken pics of dolls they see on sale near them!

•Is there a doll that is generally unpopular that you love? Is there a popular doll you don’t get the hype for?

Frozen Charlotte is cute but overrated. A lot of other dolls are cute in the same way she is and they all deserve love.

•Are you good at remembering their names without looking at the chipboards/etc?

Yeah I remember pretty well! At least all the dolls I own.

•Do you make up lore for them? Or do you not think of that kinda stuff/are fine with their poems being their only ‘lore’?

I have such horribly convoluted lore for them you have no idea lmao.

•Do you take pictures of them?

Yes! Nothing professional but pictures when they're clean and I find something cute to pose them with!

•What do the people around you irl think of them?

People tend to think they're gross/dislike them. I don't really care they're my children.

•Have you ever taken one or more with you in public?

Oh yes- mostly Butcher Boop cause I have a cosplay of her but my 20th anniversary Eggy for an art project once!

•How long have you been in the fandom?

Since 2010-2012. I was too young to remember exact dates.

•What other dolls do you collect along with them?

Porcelain dolls! I also used to collect mh and Eah dolls but don't anymore. LDDs Are the only ones I actively collect.

•When did you last buy a LDD?

Christmas 2023! Though I plan to get some this Christmas or my birthday.

•Do you notice any common themes in the LDDS you collect? (For example maybe you collect mostly the boy dolls or ones that are more on the goth side)

Though I do gear a bit towards boy dolls, I also gear towards the cheaper dolls lmao.

•Is there anything you’d change about LDDS if you could? Is there anything you wish the people behind LDDS would do differently?

Lots of things, but these are problems I have with horror as a genre so it's no surprise. Mainly I feel racism and ableism in the dolls (Lack of dark dolls and black dolls, slurs both ableist and racist as doll names, and generally feeding into tropes about mental illness) are huge issues within the designs that need to be addressed more fairly in future series.

•Do you urself dress alternatively? (Asking this because LDDs tend to attract the goth crowd 🦇)

Nah, but I would like some more alt-y clothes in general cause they look cool as hell.

I’m bored so here’s a list of questions for Living Dead Dolls collectors bc there’s not too much LDD content on here 🥲 (you don’t have to answer all of these!! Just answer whatever you want!)

————————————————————————

•First Living Dead Doll?

•How did you first learn of LDDS?

•Favorite LDD you own?

•Your dream LDD?

•Which LDD did you pay the most for?

•Which LDD did you pay the least for?

•Is there a doll you ended up liking a lot more than you initially thought you would?

•Is there a LDD you regret getting?

•Do you own a rare LDD or one that has shot up in price?

•Do you pair up any dolls in your mind? (Shipping or otherwise)

•Do you display them in box or out of box?

•If you buy them second hand do they have to come with the box, death certificate, and accessories? Or are you fine with just the doll?

•Own any in bad condition? Have any that came second hand that you had to fix up?

•How many LDDs do you own?

•Opinion on the ‘Presents’ dolls?

•Do you have any characters you’d like to see as a LDD one day?

•Opinion on the new LDDS that can bend their arms and legs?

•Which doll(s) would you like to see get a resurrection?

•Least favorite LDD you’ve seen?

•Have you seen LDDs for sale irl?

•Is there a doll that is generally unpopular that you love? Is there a popular doll you don’t get the hype for?

•Are you good at remembering their names without looking at the chipboards/etc?

•Do you make up lore for them? Or do you not think of that kinda stuff/are fine with their poems being their only ‘lore’?

•Do you take pictures of them?

•What do the people around you irl think of them?

•Have you ever taken one or more with you in public?

•How long have you been in the fandom?

•What other dolls do you collect along with them?

•When did you last buy a LDD?

•Do you notice any common themes in the LDDS you collect? (For example maybe you collect mostly the boy dolls or ones that are more on the goth side)

•Is there anything you’d change about LDDS if you could? Is there anything you wish the people behind LDDS would do differently?

•Do you urself dress alternatively? (Asking this because LDDs tend to attract the goth crowd 🦇)

#living dead dolls #ldds #AHHH I LOVE THISSS IT WAS SO FUNNN!!!#i should engage more w this fandom tbh

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goof320 · 2 years ago

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random goof ramble omg,,,

i hope whatever the valve deckard is is its Good and the same price as psvr2?? but i also dont care about new vr,, i only want valve deckard or new valve vr headset or whatever because it means they'll come out with a new game at the same time

half life alyx was *so* good and i dont think there's been a vr game to come close to how good it was and still is 2ish years later. i think half life 3 coming out with their new, not super expensive (~$500 please valve) headset would probably bend over and spank the other 5 billion standalone vr headsets coming out. half life 3 should *not* be only vr, fucking Obviously, but if it didnt have native vr support id be pretty upset because holy shit the end scene of hl:a ***you were HOLDING the fucking crowbar*** i need that for a 10-15 hour long campaign

valve,,, if yoy use tumblr,,, please.,.,.,.. youd make so much money hl3 wouldn't even have to come with the headset it could be $70 and youd be PRINTING money for the rest of time PLEASEEEE

also, it'd be really cool for a new valve game that's not a tech demo,,, i dont think hl:a was a tech demo for vr, but it.. kind of was? a really really good tech demo, but they probably wouldn't have made a spinoff half-life game if not for New Cool Technology. im pretty sure all of the recent valve games have been glorified tech demos. which i like them!! they're fun!!!! i adore hl:a and aperature desk job. and their vr game with the minigames is cute. the aperature game with the hand robots is cute, too. im probably missing one but all of them have been cute fun lil games.

hl3 tho,, new full valve game not just for a specific new tech thing? wooh.,.,. works on their new (and old) vr thing, steam deck, and a normal pc? Wooh,,,,, money printer right there.

more deckard rant... i hope to got its not a standalone.

maybe a standalone that doesn't play games.. hear me out wait hold on

valve doesnt like splitting up steam im pretty sure. if it was standalone, itd run on the xr2, an ARM chip, whereas all of steamvr is x86 because fucking duh yeah its for computers. i don't think valve is gonna have that thing running proton and like.. box86 or whatever. itd be TERRIBLE!! and theres no way in fresh hell they're putting the steam deck chip in there, or any other x86 thing, because it'd SUCK!!!!!! but if it was like... xr2 without steam. you can stream from your desktop, play those games wirelessly (or with displayport pls valve) or just look at your monitor in vr and browse the internet Whatever. i do wonder if a valve standalone with ARM would run linux ARM or android... knowing valve i bet it'd be linux. something thatd be SO fucking cool is- ok hear me out again this is a long one

steamvr home is cool... it sucks right now because valve hasn't done anything with it forever, and it just tanks your computer the second it starts, and there's.. not much to do BUT WHAT IF there was... what if it was like.. steam home (corny idc) and-

hello. i just spent 10 minutes describing neosvr. i deleted all that because i realized, i want valve to buy neosvr and put it in steam. just, right in the client. the whole thing. share media with ur friends, have a home world u can do Whatever the Fuck you want with and custom avatars and whatever you Want. neosvr is in a weird spot and if valve just fucking swallowed them whole and rebranded it as a Steam Home thing id ascend into the 6th dimension. neosvr is so fucking cool.... it makes me very sad though because again its in a weird spot and im sure they'll figure it out but Eeeeee,,,

anyway as i was saying... neos but in steam .. u start ur Valve Deckard or whatever its called.. new shiny vr ... and you sign into your steam account and ur put into steamvr+neos. its some new home lobby, there's a desktop sitting somewhere that you can boot up and its just fucking. linux arm with kde. because that'd be insane. or u could set it up to stream your big beefy desktop (maybe a vr headset modeled sitting next to it u can physically put onto your head to turn on the streaming as long as ur pc is accessible on the network). but also you could go outside or maybe just open a menu and go into whatever public world and do social vr things and neosvr things. please. itd be so cool,,, all the deckard could run would be steam home 2.0 and game streaming but itd be So Cool.... kind of a tough sell to people without computers untill vr cloud streaming becomes viable but i think people with computers (already valve's main demographic lol) may consider it.

#half life #valve #vr #hl3 #hla #i havent actually beaten half life episode 1 and 2 #i just beat hl2 last night and i thought it was really cool #i will bootlick valve till the day i die #im not ashamed to admit it #they are my comfort corporation /j #neos #neosvr #ramble #awesome #words

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honeydew-mel0n · 4 years ago

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Comfort.

The reader gets attacked outside of their workplace. Fearing that the person who did will follow her home, she goes to the only place where she knows she'll be safe. Dantes trailer.

Reboot! Dante x reader

Capitalism sucks.

Especially when you have to work a 10 hour shift at a very popular store, full of cheaply made over priced lingerie and ugly fast fashion. Because of the continence of the store you work in, the customers arent that hard to deal with. Teen girls and middle aged moms, and of course the occasional Karen. All shit you can deal with.

However, on days like this, you get the creeps. "Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to buy something or leave." You say, trying to stay calm. He'd been at the register talking to you for the past 20 minutes, and had taken to ogling your tits. "Actually I don't, if I'm such a problem. Give me your number, and I'll leave." He flashes you a- I'd say toothy smile , but there were so many rotten and missing that it would probably be cruel.

"I uh, I can't." You look around for any of your coworkers, now all somewhere out of sight. "I'm not allowed to when I'm clocked in." That was a total lie, but he wouldnt take a normal. 'Fuck off old man.' Just as irritation begins to show on his face you spot a head of blond hair headed to the register. Relief sweaps through your body.

He walks behind the other cash register, then spots the man. Standing at checkout, with nothing to check out. Your eyes lock and he sees the fear immediately. "Is there something I can help you with, sir?" The man chortles. "Yes, actually, I'd like to speak with a manager about your awful employee."

Instant joy spreads through your body. Your boss lifts the little card around his neck, showing off the big red letters spelling 'Manager.' "You are, so do you want to tell me why you've been standing here for almost 30 minutes and bothering one of my girls?"

___

You slide on your jacket, laughing along with your coworkers. All deciding to poke fun at the bastard who wouldnt leave you alone. "Thanks again Kyle, but I gotta go. See you tomorrow!" You wave at your boss before heading out of the store and into the the main walkways of the mall. You wave at the janitor before pushing out into the parking lot.

The lot was almost barren, only the employee cars. Dispite this, the large lot made it hard to find anything. You'd be struggling to find your own car if it weren't for the 'I ❤ hot moms' bumper sticker. You squat and look under the car, hoping there isnt anyone going to cut your Achilles tendon. Then you look through the back window.

Big mistake.

A hand comes to the back of your head, slamming your head against the glass. He grabs onto your shirt, pulling you down onto the ground. You scream and try to fight him, eyes hazy from the impact. You kick at his legs, but for a geezer he can sure take a hit. You hear people run over and panic more.

'Shit, am I gonna be trafficked!?'

You're lifted off the ground and someone pulls the man away. "Are you okay? Crap, you're bleeding." It wasnt someone you knew, but it was probably someone who worked in another store. You take a deep breath and lean on your car. The man running off. "Mother fucker..." you mumble.

_________

A cigarette sits burning in an ash tray, because currently the only thing on his lips was a bottle of cheap beer. Tuesday nights suck, clubs are dead and the dancers are just trying to get their jobs done. So he was alone. Dante eyes the cigarette, before getting distracted by the knock on the trailer door.

He sets the beer bottle down, rolling his eyes. Wonder which fucker it is this time? "Look man, I havent done anything tonight. Can ya just get of my-" he opens the door and is greeted by a familiar face. You look down, bleary eyed and sigh. "I'm sorry, I just didnt know if he followed me and I didnt want to go home if he was. I didnt want to... die."

"What. Happened."

You told him everything, sitting on that smoke scented couch as he cleans the blood from your face and neck. You told him you could do it but he didnt listen, guess its paying back his dues. Seeing as how you'd spent your teen years doing the same thing for him.

Eventually he'd found himself pacing around the trailer. Irritated and running his hands through his deep brown hair.

"What did he look like?" He says, looking around for Ebony and Ivory. You've had to bail him out of jail before, you dont want to have to do that for murder. "Dante, no. There's a thousand old men who look exactly like him in Limbo alone!" "Then I'll take out all of them!"

You flinch at his raised voice, all of his irritation faids away. He quickly takes his seat on the couch. "Shit, I'm sorry." He goes to pull you into a hug, and you practically throw yourself at him. Burying your face into his chest, you begin to shake as you hold in tears. You don't want to cry. You cant cry.

His hand comes to the back of your head, smoothing down the hair as you shake. It's kinda funny how you're the only one who gets to see this side of him. "I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you, got it?" You nod and bury your face further, taking in the sent of musk and cigarettes.

"Good."

#dmc devil may cry #reboot dante #reboot dante x reader #dante x reader #devil may cry reboot

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genesisrose74 · 4 years ago

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Christmas with the Karasuno Boys (HC’s)!!

Part 1: Daichi, Suga, Asahi, Nishinoya, Tanaka, & Ennoshita

Part 2 (Kageyama, Hinata, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, Kinoshita, & Narita) here!!

A/n: Tumblr said my word count was too much so I’m splitting this bad boi up into two parts :p Enjoy!!

*****

Daichi

A huge romantic during Christmas, 10/10 quality cliche times spent together

You wanna go ice skating? Hell yeah sweetheart, he will make it the most beautifully romantic thing you’ve ever seen

Like straight out of a holiday postcard type beat

Istg the rink he takes you to looks like a more heartwarming version of Rockefeller Center

He’s a big keeper of tradition when it comes to making plans, but doesn’t mind a bit of nonsense fun when everything falls into place

Which is why you love to bring the team along on adventures because they make everything all the more entertaining

At first he’s confused like ??? You don’t have to do that just if they’ve been pestering you about it

But then he realizes you care as much about them as he does (hint: a hell of a lot) and they’re thus invited along for some stuff

Of course y’all also get some quality time together on dates with just you both

Anyways you and Daichi have talked a lot about traveling and how he was really interested in seeing new places

So as his gift you got him a carved map with a roll of red string and thumbtacks, so that he could plan out all the places he wanted to visit

You know how when Kiyoko found the “Fly” banner for Karasuno and all the boys cried?

Yeah

Like that but with lots more hugging and laughing

“You know you’re gonna have to help with mapping this out, right?”

“Is that an invitation I hear?”

“Oh, that’s a promise”

FJSFJDSK ALEXA PLAY AMERICAN BOY BY ESTELLE—

Please I love him; he is so damn sly and sassy I will die with this headcanon

Sugawara

I swear on everything that Christmas with him is equivalent to a Hallmark movie

It smells like joy and warmth wherever he is, and this season only amplifies it

He is such a cheeseball without even having to try

But it’s in the really endearing and heart-melting way,,, just MMM PERFECT

He’ll take you on a walk through those neighborhoods with those crazy light decorations in the front yard and buy you hot chocolate

If he sees a group of little kids gaping at all the lights, he’ll leave them starry-eyed with stories of magic, reindeer, Santa and so-forth

“You know, I’ve heard that Rudolph’s nose is supposed to be brighter than the world’s most powerful Christmas light”

Good heavens, children absolutely adore this man

Anyways he’ll make it a little game as y’all walk around this beautifully lit neighborhood, both of you with a different assortment of bingo squares printed on paper

First one to bingo chooses a movie to watch after getting back to Suga’s house

Will wrap a big fluffy blanket around you both and pull you into his chest while watching the movie

For his gift, you got a star named after him

It’s because y’all alway go stargazing for dates every month, just to sit out, talk and cuddle

Suga gave you the SOFTEST look after opening your gift and this cute little card you made 🥺

“Lets go try to find my new favorite star”

PLEASE HE IS SO SWEET

“Right now? Koushi it’s 11:30 pm”

“Just for ten minutes, and then I’ll get you home”

So y’all spend the rest of Christmas Eve on his roof, sipping warm tea and attempting to locate Star Suga

Asahi

Cuddle bear alert ‼️‼️

It’s basically hibernation time for him, because he’s not the biggest fan of cold

That’s alright with you though 😌 more coziness for you

Lots of quality moments indoors means more creative dates

A whole day devoted to chill present wrapping? Hell fuckin’ yeah

Nice music, pretty wrapping paper, shiny bows, maybe a little Christmas rom-com playing in the back — the whole shebang

You find out pretty quickly that despite how it sounds, it’s actually quite a satisfying and enjoyable pastime

Practically had to drag him out of your living room to secretly wrap his own gift

As much as he’s the king of timidity and soft™, he can be very playfully stubborn when he’s comfortable, hence why he was such an ass to get out of the room

I have no doubt that Asahi would melt for the most adorable, cheesy shit

So you not only bought him some really reliable headbands for volleyball use, but you also made a little coupon booklet

He can basically cash in paper promises for certain things, like getting to choose the next date idea, picking a movie to watch without any objection, having you make his favorite food, etc.

There’s one that he can exchange for a full out spa day trip, because good heavens he’s a sucker for those

Massage and exfoliation and everything — it makes him feel ✨refreshed✨

He was ecstatic fam, I don’t even know what to say

Like a puppy who just got a bunch of toys and a new backyard to play

Mans cashes in one almost immediately, and at first you’re confused

Like it’s Christmas time bubs, what are we gonna be able to do when most places are closed and it’s the holidays?

Then you read the paper

“Free hug (can be used and renewed <3)”

GIVE HIM HIS DAMN HUGS RIGHT NOW

He uses that one a lot throughout the upcoming days, to the point where he just keeps the paper on him for fun

“You realize you can just ask me silly, you don’t need to keep carrying the coupon around”

“Yeah, but it’s entertaining”

Cute little cheeky bastard

Nishinoya

LOVES LOVES LOVES CHRISTMAS

You know the 12 Days of Christmas? The song??

He gets you a small present EVERY DAY for all 12 days

Not to mention he has a big present that he saves for the actual holiday

Y’all are the type of couple to get ice cream in the middle of winter

Nishi loves his cold snacks any time of year, and you’ve thus picked up a similar taste

He will consistently pester you about what kind of present you got him

Gets pouty when you don’t tell him, but in the back of his mind he’s glad because it would ruin the surprise

Anything you get him instantly becomes his most prized gift tho

It could be a literal rock with googly eyes and he’d put it in a protective glass case for preservation

But of course you get him something better than that because he only deserves the best

He’s got this specific assortment of products to maintain his spiky hair and to make sure it’s healthy, but they’re pretty expensive to buy when he runs out

When he tore open your present’s decorative wrapping to discover a huge basket of basically every hair product he ever needed, he got wide-eyed

There was also a booklet of little notes you’d kept throughout the month that listed all the little things you noticed and adored about your precious boyfriend

He nearly CRIED reading them

“Baby, you didn’t have to do all that for me”

“You act like you don’t deserve all of it and more, Nishi”

Refuses to leave your side after that

Holding your hand, hugging you as tight as he can, etc.

He is head over heels idc idc

Tanaka

Another man who is obsessed with the holiday season and everything that comes with it

He is the biggest sap for this shit istg

Will spend hours trying to get you the best present of all time

And he succeeds exceptionally

Mistletoe? He’s got an ABUNDANCE on hand at any time, just to make sure he can get fair share of his kissies 🥰

His signature beanie appears in full force during winter

Sometimes you’ll pull it over his eyes before giving him a peck on the cheek and dashing off in the school halls

“I’ll see you after school, babe!”

Speech = jumbled + incomprehensible

“Uh hUh, you do that~”

He’s: adorable

I just know that he melts for really sweet and thought-out gifts

Like anything you give him he’ll adore, don’t get me wrong, but the ones done with special care and love are just his kryptonite

He brought you into a massive bear hug and spun you around when he opened a photo book of old pictures taken together, complete with lots of cute messages and anecdotes written alongside them

You and Saeko may have also gone in on another present for him without his knowledge

And on Christmas Eve, you dragged a curious Tanaka into his front yard to the sight of a shiny motorbike

It was Saeko’s old one that she’d held onto for a while, and an old schoolmate offered to fix it up nice in time for the holiday at a discount, so y’all decided to divvy up the lowered price and got it done for Ryu

Sweet boy was taken aback, with his hands clapped over his mouth and everything

Saeko patted him on the back as he stood there in shock, giving her baby brother a sweet smile

“All yours, little bro!”

Ya, Saeko fucking loves you 😌 and so does Tanaka

Overall very lovely, would cry to be loved by the Tanaka siblings

Ennoshita

After spending past Decembers with his fellow second year classmates (namely, the very enthusiastic Noya and Tanaka), he’s grown to know quite a bit about the different holiday events that go on around town

Still, Ennoshita is a pretty simplistic guy and is content with simply spending time with you

So when you recommended going to pick a Christmas tree out for your place together, he’s totally down

As long as he gets to help decorate too ☺️

Y’all end up picking a beauty of a tree ngl

It’s SO TALL

And a super stronk friend — fit for the most heavy duty of ornaments

It takes some damn work to get that bad boi inside and upright after driving back to your house

But like hell did that stop you

Now that it was all set up, sturdy, and given plenty of water, decorations were brought into the equation that same night

No rest until it’s all set up and looking mighty beautiful

Okay maybe some coffee breaks in between, but other than that the grind don’t stop ✋😤

Ennoshita is an expert at making Christmas trees look absolutely immaculate

Idk if it’s because he’s had to deal with cleaning up disorder for a while now?

Looking at you, ya second year loons

He just has the touch, fam

He’ll of course let you have input on which light colors, what type of ornaments, and so on

But honestly it’s really fun seeing him fully concentrated on making your tree the best it can be

He lets you on his shoulders to put on the tree topper 🥺

For his gift, Ennoshita really loves books, so you decided to get him 12 different (hardcover!!) stories — one for each month in a year

Along with a small sticky-note blurb on the covers of each to explain why you chose it, and to give similar title recommendations if he ends up enjoying

He was so surprised with how thoughtful and extensive it was

Loved it so much that he immediately started to read the first one, with you sat in his lap

“Chikara, you realize you’re meant to start this one in January?”

“Shh, I’m getting a head start”

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shou7 · 4 years ago

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Some disjointed thots on (PW+ML+AA) (single mix and everything else is just bloat to convince fans to buy copies so they don’t exist to me)

1. This is everything FP should’ve been. CB technology-related themes, nostalgic Game synths, ⊿ naming sense, the chic otona-pop of JPN, experimentalism of LEVEL3, world/concept-building of CE. Whatever Nakata was talking about back then about how everything Prfm does is future pop, and how their next work is gonna be their best.... THIS is what he should’ve been referring to. It took us 3 extra years but FUTURE POP is finally here...

2. What I really love about these new tracks is that they all have multiple layers of melodies that build on one another, and the tracks all go Somewhere, instead of feeling copypasted and one-note. But also not in a cheap lulz im so random and QuIrkY! way like in 7iro with an entirely different section that pops out of nowhere, never to be heard from again in any form. That new bridge in PW is a masterpiece (dare I say on the level of SOL’s). ML has this dissonant backward synth which sounds really out of place at first, but is eventually incorporated together with the rest of the song and resolved. And it does a really good job in creating tension in the song. The guitar from AA’s intro returns during certain sections of the song, as well as the outro (unlike PMU’s acoustic guitar).

3. And so I actually think this is Prfm’s most effortless and inspired-sounding release post-2013. Like... Nakata actually sounds like he enjoyed making these tracks, instead of trying to churn out commercial jingles and THEN extending them for release as soon as possible (to mixed results). The new tracks all have these flourishes and melodies and details added to them that’s been absent for a very long time (especially the distinct bridges!!!!). The lyrics actually have depth to them, and the tracks all have the required runtime to evolve and fully-realize themselves. Literally none of that uwu uwu DISPLAY DISPLAY DISPLAY x 16. So shoutout to the CEOs of Tully’s and Levi’s for rejecting Nakata jingles two times each. We could not have done it without you....

4. On a related note, apparently Nakata has finally had an actual discussion with Prfm wrt music direction for the first time in almost 20 years. And the benefits are clear. These songs were tailor made for them, as they are NOW. No infantile tiny baby chipmunk voices. And no continuous throwing of shit on the wall (future bass, retro, Japamyu leftovers, other assumptions of what a US/global audience wants) to see what sticks.

5. Nakata’s mentioned several times that he doesn’t like looking back at his past works, and I assume being forced by his label to remaster his old tracks played a part in helping him recapture his spark. Covid probably also helped with getting him to stay tf home and reflect instead of getting high while DJ-ing at clubs.

6. It’s hilarious how TW was released a year ago and yet the rollout of this single is still evidently rushed af. From the whole audio to video production timeline it’s all a hot mess lmao. But what’s new?

7. Wrt the video, it’s boring. The capsule references are cute but that’s it. Everything else is just dark. I think the dance set has the same issue with Everyday’s. A full CGI set from Rhizomatiks would have worked better and looked less cheap. But PW suffers even more because the set is so dull and static. At least Everyday had flashing and moving clouds, and flying and whatnot. PW had nothing lol. They should’ve just gone full vaporwave acid trip aesthetic like in the P Cubed tour interlude.

8. The Prfm budget being slashed is probably another major factor as to why their videos have been pretty tragic Saisei onwards. Their pull on the general public has been on a decline (being the most well-known girl group or whatever in Japan doesn’t matter when girl groups as a whole aren’t doing very well). So from a company perspective it makes more sense to invest in live shows over music videos. And they definitely are continuing to make money off their tours considering that every tour has seen an increase in ticket pricing...!!! Sad for their music video legacy but oh well.

9. ML>PW>AA

10. FUTURE POP tracklist from another timeline: 1. Mugen loop 2. Android and 3. Polygon wave original mix 4. Time warp 5. If u wanna 6. Let me know 7. Tokyo girl 8. Houseki no ame 9. Mugen mirai 10. Toumei ningen 11. Everyday 12. Saisei

#prfm #how long has it been since my last prfm related post lmao #and YES i am clinically insane

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adultswim2021 · 4 years ago

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Ephemera Week (2002)

It’s still ephemera week, and we’re still talking about John K. I said most of my piece on him in the last post, so don’t expect there to go full bore on this one, except I forgot to say he’s animation’s Jerry Lewis. His current stuff is basically Hardly Working. I will not elaborate, because I’m being mean to you0.

MARCH SPECIALS!

In March, Adult Swim advertised a run of one-off specials. A couple of them were already covered because they fell under the parameters of “Adult Swim original production”. They were Welcome to Eltingville (March 3rd) and Saddle Rash (March 24th).

Day in the Life of Ranger Smith | March 10th 2002 - 11:00 PM (Originally aired on Cartoon Network in 1999)

This was one of two specials commissioned by Cartoon Network re-imagining Yogi Bear. The artist what took this assignment was John K, who I REEEAALLY skewered in last night’s post, didn’t I?

This is about Ranger Smith harassing animals and writing them up for violating park rules, basically. It’s short! I remember liking it at the time! Okay, maybe I’m going crazy here, but I distinctly remembered a part at the end where Ranger Smith is in bed and he solemnly confides in the viewer that the noises of wilderness give him nightmares and then it just ends. Did I imagine this? It does end with him in bed, but this doesn’t happen in the version on YouTube (which is from the Adult Swim airing). Huh.

Boo Boo Runs Wild | March 10th 2002 - 11:15PM (Originally aired on Cartoon Network in 1999)

Boo Boo Runs Wild was another one of these stand-alone Yogi Bear John K specials. This one was 30 minutes long. The Ranger Smith short was a brief 7 minutes; I’m guessing they aired a couple Capt. Lingers or something to fill time.

This one is about Boo Boo reverting to his feral nature and causing BIIIIG problems! This special would later go on to be kind of a weird trolling thing Adult Swim would do where they aired it every Sunday for a few months, even promoting regularly. This was like 2006, I think? They’d also air it as part of April Fools. Is that Adult Swim admitting this special sorta sucks? Does it sorta suck? Again, I liked these at the time and REFUSED to actively rewatch these for this write-up. Sorry.

The Jetsons: Father and Son Day/The Best Son | March 10th, 2002 11:45PM (Originally aired on CartoonNetwork.com in 2001) Our John K rock block ends with a pair of Jetsons shorts, Father and Son Day and The Best Son respectively. This is kinda the same deal as his Yogi Bear shorts, but these were exclusive for Cartoon Network’s website. I remember watching them on there. They are as bad as you’d expect late-period John K internet shorts to be, though the second short is a superior version of Spielberg’s A.I. (in that it’s shorter).

Night of the Living Doo | March 17th, 2002 - 11:00PM (originally aired on Cartoon Network, 2001)

Night of the Living Doo originally aired as wraparound segments during a Halloween Scooby Doo marathon on Cartoon Network. It’s kinda like an episode of the Scooby Doo Movies, which shoehorned in a guest star each episode. Suddenly my man Dick Van Dyke be running a carnival and shit. That’s the Scooby Doo Movies. At the end of the night they played all the wraparound segments in one uninterrupted sitting, so the viewer could appreciate it as an actual full-on Scooby Doo episode. Night of the Living Doo functioned both as an extension of that series as well as a parody. The guests were Gary Coleman, David Cross, and the very cool band Big Bad Voodoo Daddy. It was all very self-deprecating and had jokes about the absurdity of Scooby Doo tropes. Well trod territory by this point, sure. But this is better than most irreverent Scooby Doo things. It didn’t hurt that I was a HUGE David Cross fan when this aired. Is this where I tell the stupid-ass story about getting mad at a message board guy for not liking David Cross? Sure. Okay, yeah. When this aired on Adult Swim a guy on Kon’s (hi Kon) message board posted something about not finding David Cross funny, shrugging that he didn’t get the hype. He cited this and his appearances in the Men in Black movies, and nothing else as proof for his lackluster comedy skills. It’s kinda like deeming Eddie Murphy as a bad comedian after watching Dr. Doolittle.

The point of this special is that David Cross is a little wooden and stilted, like in the old Scooby Doo Movies episodes. This poster revealed that he never heard David Cross’s stand-up or seen Mr. Show, explaining “I don’t watch puppet shows” A response that still baffles me to this day. Why Mr. Show isn’t a-- WHAT IS HE TALKING ABOUT? I’m not even sure if there was EVER a puppet on Mr. Show*. David wasn’t even a guest on Crank Yankers at this point! SO WHAT THE FUCK? To this day whenever mutual pals from that board get together and watch a movie or show and a puppet appears we make a joke about this guy. Good story? No? Fuck you.

Other stuff about this show: When it originally aired on Cartoon Network it was a little bit longer than the Adult Swim version. There’s a missing scene. I think it’s David trying to play an improv game with a mummy or something. At one point I had it on tape, but I’m not sure I kept it. Sorry.

*sorry to be coy here, but I do know of at least one puppet on Mr. Show, episode 204 there is brief footage of Grass Valley Greg putting on a puppet show for his staff. This CAN’T be the source of the confusion, can it? It’s literally like, 5 seconds.

MAIL BAG

This’ll teach me to skip a day cuz this really piled up. Thanks, guys. I love all the attention. It is my favorite thing.

I never really saw oblongs as something for the hot topic set. They had Invader Zim and Squee for that kind of shit. Oblongs feel like it was always directly targeting me: the shut-in comedy nerd who would appreciate will ferrell and the sklars being in a thing. Since they ended up doing the exact same show with Janeane Garofalo and David Cross a few years later it seems like that was the goal.

Yeah, I guess that also makes sense. There were a few elements that were kinda gothy but this show was mostly just Angus Oblong ahem, clowning around (puckering mouth to stifle laughter like Chris Elliott in Cabin Boy)

What are your thoughts on the other adult animation blocks of the past couple decades? Spike's notriously failed attempt. Animation Domination. Apparently Syfy has had their own going?

Spike was irredeemably bad. People think this shit is easy. Animation Domination is sorta legit, but it’s anchored by mostly crap. That ADHD thing was kinda good and underrated. Is that still going on? I wish I were more diligent about watching/recording that. Some of them bumpers were good. Also, we mustn’t forget MTV’s oddities. They were kinda the first cable network to court Adult Animation as their thing. They deserve some kind of credit for that. I’m sure they’re doing fine.

I'm having a nice big thing of spaghetti for dinner with some chicken parm? Jealous?

I’ve never had those are they good

What does Ephemera mean? Why is this happenening? Why aren't you talking about 10 Home Movies episodes in a row like a good boy.

In dude time, my friend. In dude time

What would be your Adult Swim dream come true?

Having a complete archive of Adult Swim blocks on a harddrive like Don Giller has with his Letterman archive. Even the commercials and shit. I know of a guy who was a regular taper of the entire block from night 1 but I’m not sure he kept up with it when they went nightly. I should ask him if he still has his tapes, huh?

That or they bring back the BUILD YOUR OWN DVD thing but with blu-rays and you can make your own bumps, which was a different thing they had. THEY SHOULD COMBINE THEM. And you can master it in SD if you wanna put 10 hours of stuff on a disk.

All this is archival bullshit dork shit. Real answer: Clay Croker comes back from the dead and every block is hosted by Space Ghost. That’d be it, right?

If anyone has genuine/better answers please write in with them I wanna keep this conversation going. ‘kay?

McDonalds reintroduces limited edition Adult Swim Toys. You can get them all (plus an extra to keep wrapped for collectors purposes) but you have to spend 20 dollars at McDonalds to grab them all. This is the last day of the promotion. You have to personally eat everything you buy but you can take it home. You can only buy one of each food item. What are you getting? I know the longer the mailbag message is the quicker you are inclined to give some glib remark but indulge this one for once.

Oh wow. I’m literally going to take this seriously. I’d roll in as breakfast was ending. Get myself a McChicken Biscuit and a Bacon Egg & Cheese McGriddle, hashbrowns and a Coffee. Gobble that knob on down. Wipe my mouth with a napkin. It’s lunchtime, bitch. Big Mac, Large Fries, BIG ass soda. You feel me, dude? Lemme tally up. Okay, probably need more. 20 piece nugget. Take that home cuz I’m probably gonna have to save some for dinner. That’s probably 20 bucks right there, especially if you go to the McDonalds on Burnside where all the menu items are more expensive because of the amount of security they have to hire (did you know that different McDonalds have different prices even in the same city? I didn’t until very recently). If this somehow doesn’t satisfy my price point I get a Vanilla shake and eat it anally DURING my BIG D squirt sesh, so it’ll spend as little time in my body as possible. Wait, do I get something for this? I might do this tomorrow just cuz. It sounds like a funky thing to do

Do you think you'll open an Adult Swim mueseum at some point? You seem to be the only steward of its history.

Unless I’m hired to by a large corporation, probably not. Also I don’t think I actually have much in the way of merch other than DVDs. I stopped being a DVD completist at some point around Freaknick The Musical. Oh, I never EVER bought a Robot Chicken DVD, EVER. I literally had a nightmare once that one appeared in my collection.

Hey! Please keep us abreast any time you put more of your garbage on eBay. Maybe you can put your wedding dress on there, you big girl.

Fucking sexist/trasphobic behavior.

Check out my eBay auctions I got season 18 of NCIS up there and some other things :)

The Ripping Friends blow chunks. I don't care if a rapist or the opposite of a rapist (a virgin who volunteers, lol) made it. It sucks a high hard one like when Ozzy banged the Cheiftan's Wife in that Black Sabbath TV Funhouse cartoon. Tell me more.

Tell you more?

Name one rap song you tolerate lol. You can't say anything by weird al or marky mark.

I guess I like the song the pest sings from the motion picture The Pest

Are there any good podcasts on adult swim?

The official one hosted by Matt Harrigan is good, but I’ve only bounced around on it. I don’t know if there’s any formal recap ones. I simply don’t know!

HE'S GIVING HIGH HARD ONE TO CHEIFTAN'S WIFE? UH OH!

Buddy, you are BANNED for LIFE from my MAIL BAG! You drive me CRAZY!

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #night of the living doo #boo boo runs wild #yogi bear #jetsons #ephemera

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meatpower · 5 years ago

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Please consider helping me pay off a debt and afford necessities

Hello, I wish I didn't have to do this but I have to. I'm a 20 yr old autistic lesbian and I got into some shit. I'm not sure how to word any of this, but...

I woke up today to find my bank account has been blocked. I'm not sure how to translate these things, some of them may be specific to Czech republic and I don't know the english terms, but basically I'm in debt because I got caught on public transport without a ticket ONCE when I was 15 years old and couldn't afford the transport ticket on my way from school. I know this is on me, but I completely forgot about it. I didn't receive any warnings or letters or calls - they always silently wait at least 5 years, with the debt getting bigger every day without your knowledge, and when youre an adult they come at you full force.

I don't know if this happens in other countries, but it's a staple batshit thing in my country everyone knows about. There's children hundreds of dollars in debt because of public transport, it happens so often, it's always in the news and stuff. It's revolting and now it happened to me.

My debt is 455 dollars, and they already seized all the money on my bank account, which left me with nothing, and I have to pay 234 more dollars. I'm devastated.

I have no means of getting this money right now. I'm currently finishing last year of school and I have to pass what I'll translate as big ass state exams in less than a month to graduate. I don't get paid until the 20th of this month, but I still need to pay rent and buy food until then, and the amount I'll get would just barely pay it off. Since my brother and I moved recently, we have no furniture either and I was saving up for necessary items, which is now gone. I also just got approved for disability pension, but they're still in the process of calculating the money they will give me, which usually isn't much, but it helps.

So, I need to pay off the debt and afford rent and food on top of that, so Im gonna try asking for donations. My mom said she's gonna help me a bit, but she is poor as well as it is, so I decided to try my luck here as well. Please don't feel obliged to donate - I get it, money is tight and I'm not the only one struggling, and if you don't have much yourself, take care of yourself first - but if a fraction of my followers had some money to spare and was so kind to send me even a dollar or a few cents, it would be incredibly helpful. Anything helps a lot and I'd be eternally thankful.

In return, I can offer you art, which you can find on @xuve (original drawings) and ig @hrothgart (fanart), so if you donate and want a drawing, message me on here (I don't have much time rn though so it would take me a bit longer than usual to finish the commission!).

I will take emergency commissions for less money than usually, but I'll still set some price points because unfortunately I can't afford to draw for less than that right now. The complexity scales with the amount, but let's say...

2-9 bucks would be a doodle with simple coloring (again complexity scales with the amount), 10-19 bucks would be a fully colored character or a portrait (I can draw furries, humans, animals, real people etc...) And 20+ dollars would be a scene with a background. If you have something else in mind, feel free to suggest anything :)

I'm bad at summing things up but...

TLDR: I got caught on public transport once when I was 15 and couldn't afford a ticket, I forgot about it because they kept silent for 5 years with no warnings while the debt grew bigger, and now they want 455 dollars, half of which they seized from my account, which is now blocked as well. This thing happens in my country a lot. Im left with money in the negatives and I need to afford rent and food. If you were so kind and sent me even one dollar so I can afford to live, I'd be really thankful, and I can draw in return.

My PayPal is [email protected] (excuse the deadname). If you cant donate, a reblog is always appreciated. Thank you so much!

#donation post #donation #donations #signal boost #help

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piracytheorist · 4 years ago

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A Kiss for Good Luck (10/15)

Summary: So this is the story of one born lucky, and one born unlucky. Fate will keep making them cross paths, but is it to bring them together, or to test them? Captain Swan AU.

Rating: T (make sure you’re okay with the warnings on AO3)

Word count for this chapter: 4.9k (50k in total) AO3

Read from the beginning: Tumblr | AO3

Chapter 10: Killian Jones, October 19th 2015 – May 19th 2016

Killian only holds back because Emma does; if she gave him any indication, he'd be really reaching into the kiss. She pulls back gently, her cheeks having gone slightly red.

He directs his eyes back into hers to distract himself from the fact that she either enjoyed the kiss a lot, or didn't enjoy it at all. He's about to smile at her when he sees Eloise from the corner of his eye and turns to her. She's looking at them with her typical cold expression that hides a ton of judgement underneath.

He swallows his sigh for Emma's sake; he's so tired of Eloise and her everything. He shrugs at her casually. Did she actually expect something from him?

And if she did, does he care anymore?

He turns back to Emma. “Don't worry,” he says, hoping Eloise's appearance didn't dampen the mood, and a thought jumps into words before he has the time to stop it. "Wanna add me on Facebook? It's Killian Jones, if, if you're interested...” To do what? Find something to tell her, find something! “We can share favourite songs."

Emma snorts, amused. "Like we're in high school?"

He doesn't have the best memories from high school, but he remembers enough about that awkwardness to know he feels similarly now. "I won't stalk you if you don't add me, just saying."

His stomach nearly does a flip when Emma smirks at him. She reaches into her belt bag and takes out her phone, which immediately slips from her fingers.

"Shit," she says. When she picks it up, they both can see that the screen cracked a bit. "Shit!"

"Oh. I feel as if I've caused that." As if he hasn't made things awkward enough.

Emma shakes her head. "It's replaceable. Don't worry. Killian Jones, you said?"

His chest feels warm at the sound of his full name in her voice. He should stop her; even in the slightest chance that she's actually interested, he's not the best person for any kind of connection.

But Emma is quick with her phone and says, "Friend request sent,” and he nearly leans down to kiss her again. “So we can chat about hot, new releases," she adds, still sounding amused.

He's about to ask for her last name. His battery is dying and he probably won't have the time to open the app before his phone turns off, and now that she did add him, his curiosity is skyrocketing.

"Hey," an older woman calls at Emma from the side. The woman looks at him with a slightly cautious glare, and looks a bit alike with Emma.

"Coming," Emma tells her. "So, we'll keep in touch," she tells him, actually pointing at him with her phone.

He just smiles in response, giving her a slight wave goodbye.

Watching them leave, his eye catches Eloise pouting, keeping her arms folded and staring at him from afar. He snorts and takes out his phone, impatient to accept Emma's request and find out her full name.

Instead of the Facebook app, he accidentally opens the camera, just as Klaus Meine walks right by him. He sees Killian, phone in hand, stops walking, and smiles.

"S-Selfie?" is all Killian can say, shocked.

He doesn't even see Eloise walk furiously towards him, his eyes fixed on the perfect selfie he got with the lead singer of the group they just watched perform.

"What was all that about?" Eloise says upon reaching him.

Killian looks at her, retort ready. "That was me taking a selfie with Klaus Fucking Meine."

Eloise scoffs. "You were kissing that bitch."

"Oh, come on,” he taunts her. “You're just jealous you didn't get a selfie."

"I'm serious," she says, her 's' whistling through her teeth.

"Serious? About what? We're just fucking, and you know that. You treat me like a piece of meat and you expect full commitment on my side? Maybe you're thinking of the wrong woman as a 'bitch'."

Eloise is speechless. And he is suddenly feeling powerful.

"You know what? Fuck that. We're done. You drive back to Brighton, I'm not gonna put up with a return trip if you're involved."

"And what are you gonna do?" she spits back at him.

"We're right in the center of town. I can afford to stay in a hotel for one night." He starts leaving.

"It's late! You'll get charged double!" She hasn't even taken a step towards him – she's waiting for him to go back to her.

She can wait all she wants.

He turns towards her, walking backwards. "I don't give a bloody damn," he tells her, then turns forward and leaves.

He leaves her.

How did he forget how calmer his nights are without her? The receptionist doesn't even charge him double – they'd just prepared a room that got cancelled last minute, and providing Killian leaves on time the next morning, it's just the standard price.

The room is nice, yet his mind is still going back to Eloise.

Damn, he left her. He made it.

And all because Emma was bold enough to kiss a damn perfect stranger.

He picks up his phone, now connected to a charger the hotel offered. Emma's friend request is right at the top of his notifications.

He smiles as he accepts.

His first day away from Eloise brings to the forefront how their relationship was way, way more than sex, only in a bad way. How he'd go to sleep some nights, nearly shaking with despair to go buy a bottle and with fear that Eloise wouldn't react well to him doing that. How that bled through to other parts about his life, how he had let her control it, and how she jumped at the chance to do so. He has a full day on his own to reflect on his thoughts and worries with a clear mind.

It ends on one conclusion; reconciling with family.

Nemo greets him back with open arms, and though Shakespeare keeps a collected face, he embraces Killian warmly too.

He spends the night there, falling asleep at the sight of his old drawings on the wall of his old bedroom. He hasn't picked up a pencil in some time...

Nemo doesn't ask anything the next morning. He's just happy Killian is back and willing to connect, and gets him to try playing chess with him, his new hobby. Killian doesn't even have the nerve to joke about Nemo's apparent mid-life crisis.

Once again, he's being more than Killian deserves. But maybe, once again, Killian can work towards being a man deserving of that love.

Before lunch, he's found himself with a picture of a forest landscape open on his phone, sketching from reference, when he receives a video call from Emma.

His heart speeds up. His hand is shaking slightly as he picks up the phone and looks at the screen, itching to tap “Accept”. He runs to the bathroom, making sure he's presentable, then back at his room, settles on his chair and accepts the call.

Her face fills the screen, and he gives her a cocky smile. She looks fresh from sleep; a different sight from the one in the concert, but what a sight still.

“Good morning,” he says. Is it? “Or afternoon? Have you gone back yet?”

“Yeah,” Emma says, smiling wide, “I arrived last night.”

“How was your trip?”

“A bit more tiring than I'm used to. But safe.”

“Than you're used to? You do it often?”

Emma explains about her extended family in Norway, her visits there a few times a year, and being used to long flights.

He finds himself feeling a little jealous. The only two times he travelled abroad brought years of bad fortune on him.

Emma definitely seems to hold something back, but he pays no mind; his closet has no fewer skeletons. They start chatting about music and end up talking about their plans for the holidays.

Time flies by and it's only when he hears Nemo call for lunch that he realizes they've been talking for an hour.

Bloody hell, he thinks, why do they have to eat so early?

He excuses himself, telling her he'll see her soon, and he can't help noticing how she seems to be holding back something again. He hopes he didn't disappoint her, and ends the call.

He looks at her name on his screen and he nearly taps it to call her again.

He locks his phone and puts it down. Wait a few days, give her time, he thinks.

He goes back to his apartment that same evening, and there's a box of the stuff he kept at Eloise's place. He checks the drawers he kept for her, and they're empty as well. Eloise's spare key is inside the box, with a note for him to not bother with his spare key of her place, as she'll be changing the locks.

He actually feels surprised. That's really mature of her, and he doesn't have to see her again.

Maybe that's what she wants too. Better for both of them.

Before he goes to sleep he starts looking for therapists, and though he doesn't contact anyone yet, he considers it a step towards the right direction. He'll get there.

He calls Emma three days later, and before he's even noticed it, they develop a schedule, chatting two times a week. He wishes to talk to her more often, but he still sees the reserved expression he knows too well on her face, and he knows she needs time. Of course, half the time it's her calling him, and she participates in conversation as much as he does.

She wants it, he knows. She's just taking it slow, and if he's honest, he needs slow too. What he had with Eloise may have led to him meeting Emma, but it still had an impact on him – and not that long after he lost the woman he loved, too.

The same afternoon he makes an appointment with a new therapist – and dreading it, considering the pile of information he'd have to give them – he gets a call from an unknown number.

“Hello?”

“Is this Killian Jones?”

“Who is it?”

“My name is George Rogers, I'm a private detective. Could you confirm your name, please?”

The detective is looking into Milah's murder. He's – lawfully – found suspicious contacts between Gold, his false witnesses and two now convicted criminals in the States, and he's opening her case. Killian's case too, considering he was assaulted as well.

Killian can barely speak. He'd lost all hope that Gold would receive any judgement from anyone but Killian himself. He thought he'd just have to live with the burden that Milah's murderer walks the streets free until he would grow desperate enough to get a gun and kill him himself.

He agrees to meet with the detective at his office and he looks at his phone when he hangs up, catching his shocked expression on the reflection, unable to even close his mouth.

When Killian opens the door to Rogers' office, he freezes as he sees the man.

Rogers just gives him a warm smile. “Mr. Jones.” Then he nods at Killian's stunned silence. “I know.”

The resemblance is uncanny; Rogers has a few grey streaks and more wrinkles, so Killian feels as if he's looking into what he'll look like about ten years from now. Physically, at least.

Rogers has acquired the testimony Killian gave when he was still at the hospital, and is trying to piece the crime together and prove the two convicted criminals are the two bodyguards Gold had hired that fateful day. With a bit of luck and skill, he can lead them to a confession. They're already in prison and it seems that Gold's finances haven't been going well lately. If he hasn't been keeping his false witnesses content, they may not be hard to persuade.

Rogers excuses himself for a moment, and Killian looks dumbfounded at the chessboard Rogers has set on his desk. Nemo didn't pick the habit up, but Killian did. He starts playing on his own, trying to distract himself from the pile of questions for Rogers and the anxiety that is building up. He doesn't want to let himself hope for Gold's arrest; he won't be able to deal with the result of the case going cold again.

“Do you play?” Rogers asks, nodding at the board.

Killian shrugs. “I started a few weeks ago. I play a bit online to...” He looks up at him, still a bit shocked at their physical resemblance. “You said you opened this case. Why?”

Rogers sits down at his desk. “It's my job. I was hired to look into it.”

“By whom?”

“Confidentiality, mate. I was looking Gold up, and after some digging I found out you had accused him for murder and assault.”

“I tried.”

Rogers shakes his head. “That bastard's a few million pounds away from starting a bloody mob. Hiring a few false witnesses is a piece of cake for him. Unfortunately for him, he can't cover all his sources and expenses. Questions start piling; where did he get all that money, and where are they going to? Especially now that his businesses are supposed to be failing.”

Rogers can't promise anything, but he looks determined to do his best. Killian doesn't allow himself any hope. He focuses on his life; going back to work with Shakespeare, finding a new AA group, starting therapy again, and talking to Emma.

He doesn't realize how much he's changing his own life until Emma points out that he told her once he's an early bird, yet there he is at two in the morning his time, chatting with her. And indeed, Shakespeare was willing to give him a late shift, but Killian didn't mind it that much either. He shifts the conversation to her choice of snack, making a sour face at the pop-tart in her hand.

“How can you eat that thing? It's like sugar-coated sugar,” he teases her.

Emma laughs, saying it's European candies that need a good dose of sugar instead.

With Christmas approaching, Rogers takes time off officially but keeps doing some work from home, and he calls Killian one evening to discuss some details about his testimony.

Killian finds a taxi fast, which manages to avoid all traffic and red lights and he arrives early at Rogers'. He's in a bathrobe and his hair is wet when he opens his door.

“You're early,” he says. “Come in.”

Killian steps in, immediately noticing the girl sitting cross-legged in front of a coffee table, playing chess.

“That's my daughter, Alice. Perhaps she can teach you a couple tricks,” Rogers says, smiling. “I'll be back in a minute.” He disappears behind a door.

“Wow,” Alice says, looking at him. “You do look like papa. He told me so but I didn't believe him.” She turns innocently to her chessboard.

A lump forms in Killian's throat; neither he nor Rogers commented much on their resemblance, but with another person so close to Rogers pointing it out, he can't help the possibilities that fill his thoughts. His deadbeat father had already left two children; what would one more before them change anything?

Could it really be?

“Can I ask you something?” Killian asks when Rogers is done with his questions. “How old are you?”

Rogers looks a bit taken aback. “Forty-five. Why?”

Thirteen years older than him. Which means his father would've been fourteen when Rogers was born. Unlikely, but still...

“Were you born here?”

Rogers sits back in his chair, his eyebrow raised. “Actually, I was born in Seattle, but my folks moved us back to Plymouth when I was five.” He pauses. “Are you curious...” he points between their faces.

Killian shrugs, but relaxes. The possibility of his father, at thirteen years old, travelling to Seattle and impregnating a woman are downright impossible.

“I was also curious, when I found your file and saw your picture. But I see a lot of people in my line of work, and trust me, there is a notable number of almost twins out there.”

Feeling comforted, but still vulnerable, Killian confesses. “It's just... my father was not much of a parent. I wouldn't put it past him to have another child he never mentioned to us.”

“I understand. I can assure you, though, it's just a coincidence.”

“It's also that... my mother's name was Alice.” He smiles at that, though.

“Oh. That is peculiar. But I simply liked the name for my daughter, and it's not like it's a super rare name.” He then turns to look at the clock as a thunder rumbles somewhere not too far. “I'll be making some dinner, would you like to stay?”

“No, it's alright.”

“You can either help, if you want, or keep Alice company as she teaches you tricks.” Rogers rubs at Alice's back, who has come to stand next to her father.

“How long has she been playing?”

“Since before I could read,” she says, proudly crossing her arms.

Killian smiles at her.

“For real,” Rogers says. “She was still in preschool when I started teaching her. That's more than six years of experience.”

“Which is why I always beat you,” Alice tells him.

Killian stands up. “Then I have no hope against you. Thanks for the offer, but you've already done enough.”

“Come on, mate, it's pouring rain outside.”

Killian smiles a little wider. “I have a good feeling about it.”

Indeed, the rain slows to a drizzle and the taxi he calls arrives quickly.

Most of his nights for the past four years have been plagued by the thought that he'd never see Gold pay for his crimes. He had a few nights of blissful calm, either brought by alcohol or the occasional good time the last couple months, but this is the first night that he feels at least relieved. Not confident or hopeful, yet; he knows better than that.

Emma confesses to him that she won't be spending Christmas with her extended family and that she lied to her friends so that they wouldn't cancel their plans for her sake.

He sneakily looks into flights for Boston while he's still on chat with Emma; a cold dread spreads in him when he's reminded of what both his trips to the States caused him.

He goes to bed very late that night, hating himself. Emma needs someone to spend the holidays with, she wants someone, and he's too afraid of his own superstitions to be that someone for her. And the worst part is, he used to be lucky. He knows what's it like to throw caution to the wind and still everything coming out fine. It's the first time in four years that he's started to feel that things have started going well. He's too afraid to push his luck.

He resorts to sending her a collection of his favourite seashells that he's gathered over the years as a gift. He's happy to hear it arrives in time, and he has a celebratory video chat with Emma on Christmas day, going along with her and her pop-tarts.

He regrets not going to Boston, or at least offering to help pay her tickets so she could come visit him, when it's New Years Eve and he has to show a happy face for his family while he knows Emma is all alone.

Just two hours before midnight his time, he takes Nemo's car and manages to find an open toy store. The owner says Killian is the luckiest bastard of the year, as he was about to close for the night. Killian buys a confetti cannon, thanks him, and wishes him a happy new year.

He allows himself exactly two hours of celebrating with his family before he goes to bed. He wakes up at half past four and sets everything up for a surprise celebration for Emma, checking at least three times that he's got his timezones right and it's still before midnight in Boston.

He starts calling her at quarter to five, but she's not online. Then again at ten to five. When she doesn't answer at five to five, he sends her an SMS to turn her WiFi on. As he waits for her to become active, he prepares to tease her for falling asleep on the one night most people want to stay up. He sets into a smug face and calls her immediately after her dot turns green.

His face falls when she accepts his call and he sees her tear-stained face, broken by a sorrowful expression.

“Oh, Swan,” he says.

Emma bursts into sobs. He waits for her, he doesn't give a damn if they miss the countdown, they can do one of their own. As long as Emma is alright.

As her sobs slow down, he feels tears in his own eyes. How he wishes he could reach over and hold her.

What a coward he was. When she wipes away her tears, he gives a silent promise to never let her experience anything like that again.

“Thank you,” Emma says.

Killian looks at the clock he's set up. “It's thirty seconds now. Do you want me to count with you?”

“Yes, please.”

He sees the smile on his preview turn more cheerful.

Emma looks at him, her smile widening as the seconds go down, contrasting her red and puffy eyes.

Killian pops the confetti cannon, but his eyes never leave her reflection. “Happy New Year!” he says.

“You stayed up,” she says.

“I... woke up,” he admits. “I mean, I went to sleep a bit early, and even I would say two is early for New Year's, so I snuck in a few hours of sleep before the alarm went off.”

Her face is so vulnerable, and the wish to hold her overwhelms him.

“Thank you. Thank you so much,” she says.

“I wouldn't forgive myself if I let you change the year alone.” Nor if I let it happen again. “Especially after you told me what you didn't tell your friends. Losing a bit of sleep is nothing.”

He has a whole array of snacks prepared for his late night with her, but he sets it aside when she says that all she has is the few pop-tarts left from Christmas.

She seems to love them so much. “Perhaps I chose the wrong flavor,” he says. “If I visit Boston one day you'll get me all kinds and I'll taste them all.”

He almost says 'when' instead of 'if'. But he has to be rational; financially he cannot yet support a trip, and he owes Emma an honest promise only when it's possible.

There's not much he's wanted from life; and by now he's learned to not push for more than he has. But is it too much to think that he's in love with her? That he's reminded what it feels like, to feel his heart full of love and not thirsty for revenge?

Is it too much to hope he can have something with her?

He makes himself some coffee, determined to stay with her until she falls asleep. Her eyes are drooping closed when he takes the phone to the window, to show her the lighter blue streak of the early sunrise. Her eyes are already closed when he sits back and sings Auld Lang Syne to her. When the song ends, he lets a few seconds go by before he calls her name once.

When there's no response, he ends the call and sends her “Happy new year, love,” in text.

The new year arrives promising. Only three days in, Rogers calls him to tell him one of Gold's fake witnesses confessed.

Killian needs to attend two sets of trials; one for Milah's murder, and one for the assault against him. Both are draining, but Nemo is beside him, and Killian bursts into tears when Gold gets life sentence.

He thinks about Milah's boy, Jack; he's barely fifteen years old, and he's dealing with what Killian had hoped he never would; seeing one – or in his case, probably both – of his parents as a monster. Gold had remarried; right after divorcing him, Belle, his now second ex-wife, was the one who had hired Rogers to look into Gold. She attested against Gold in the trial, but she seemed to care a lot for the boy.

Three weeks later he hears that Belle took custody of Jack. Killian is sure the boy hates him already; all he can do is hope his stepmother will care and provide for him.

His heart had stopped aching for revenge, but that doesn't mean it's not relieved that a murderer who chose to ruin him is now behind bars.

And with Emma, it soars. Through those emotionally taxing months, talking to her is his one constant.

Before either he or Emma realize it, their chats become a daily habit, even when there's little to say. Sometimes they just synchronize their Netflix to watch something together. Sometimes just each other's presence there on the phone screen is enough while doing housework.

Killian has completely switched to late shift at Shakespeare's boat rental, so that he can stay up late and talk with Emma after she's done with her shift.

For years, his mind was consumed with thoughts of revenge. His consciousness felt lighter, but his heart still felt empty after Gold was convicted. With Emma, he remembers how it feels like to care for someone that way, the way he did before Gold took that away from him.

Emma is in no way a replacement for Milah; but he knows it's time he moved on, and he can see in her someone he can do that with. Someone he can be happy with. Milah would want him to be happy, as he would want that for her.

Killian shares the story of his family slowly coming apart; his mother dying, his father leaving, and the final straw when his brother died. He tells her how he was nearly lost himself, how he has no idea where he'd be if Nemo hadn't, quite literally, saved him.

Emma shares her story of growing up an orphan, of being adopted and finally feeling she belonged, until her adopted mother was deported and she had to fend for herself, resorting to trusting the wrong person.

It's yet another time that Killian wishes he could reach into the screen and hold her. It could've been him, the one who trusted the wrong person and lost everything. And Emma is still standing on her feet.

He tells her about Eloise, she tells him about having done time – which makes her current standing even more admirable. Where would he be if his lawyer hadn't managed to get him on probation for breaking and entering on that stupid, desperate night?

He tells her about staying off of alcohol. How he'd thought he'd never stay clean for good. What he doesn't tell her is that it happened to be that he got the strength to keep up his sobriety just after he met her.

He loves her, he knows that. And he doesn't think lightly of their kiss at the concert, but he's not sure she's ready to hear she's had such a positive impact in his life.

And all because he was cheerful enough to hum a song and Emma happened to hear it.

With his emotions muddled by the trial, the stress, the anticipation for the results, and eventually the worry for Milah's son, he is surprised to realize it's late April and he can afford much, much more than a trip to Boston, thanks to the eighty thousand pounds he got from Gold as compensation for losing his hand.

He chooses to not wait too long for Emma. He wants her, and he wants to be good enough for her. Even though he'll need time for that, and he feels she's not ready for anything too quick either, he feels excited to meet her again.

When he tells her he's thinking of visiting her in May, she immediately offers her place for him to stay at.

His heart soars, he smiles widely – and Emma's connection cuts off.

When she comes back in, her smile reflects his. It's a relieving conversation that night, to tell each other that they want something more, but that they both need to take things slow. And one first visit can clear the path, so to speak.

He's still slightly nervous to get on the plane; he treated himself to a first class seat, however – not provoking karma by sneaking into someone else's unclaimed seats this time – and he's surprised to be awaken by a flight attendant when they've already landed at Logan Airport. There were apparently disturbances that delayed landing for an hour, and he slept peacefully through it all.

He turns on his phone and he feels a little relieved seeing Emma's message that she would have to be late. At least she wasn't left to wait for him.

He spots her as soon as the automatic doors leading out of arrivals open. She smiles and waves at him.

When they embrace, his chest feels lighter than it's felt in years. He pulls back and looks at her calm, happy face, then his gaze drops to her lips.

She closes her eyes when she pulls up to give him a peck.

(A/N: Finally, things start happening! And not just with them getting together at last!)

#Killian Jones #Captain Swan #captain swan ff #cs ff #ouat ff #akfgl #captain swan movie marathon #piracytheorist writes

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theangelwithashotgun8 · 5 years ago

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Even MORE FAHC BS!

A continuation of this but you don’t gotta read that to understand this. Basically a look at Ryan and Gav’s relationship is, apparently, my newest FAHC AU

"This is Gavin." His new boss had said as he plopped a toddler in his arms, "You're his new bodyguard."

If Ryan was being honest, he'd taken up Ramsey's offer because he had nothing else going for him. Very few people were willing to take on the quiet, creepy, kid who looks like he was too young to be on the streets. Being a glorified babysitter is not the kind of job Ryan thought would be what gets him out of sleeping in alleyways or behind dumpsters, but he's that special kind of desperate so he just hefts the toddler onto his hip and nods.

He doesn't actually have to do much at first. Jack and Geoff are very involved fathers, often sitting on the floor for "tummy time" as they encourage their son to speak. Ryan doesn't know how hardened criminals like them came across a baby of all things, one that doesn't look a thing like them, but he tries not to think about it. Gavin is a happy and healthy kid, that's as good as it's gonna get.

But things get progressively harder whenever they go out. Gavin doesn't like his stroller, will scream bloody murder the second he goes anywhere near it, so Ryan is usually left carrying him or holding his hand as they walk. Turns out, Geoff has a lot of enemies and all of them want him and his family dead. Jack can hold his own, but Gavin is a literal baby and can't do much.

Ryan has always been okay with violence, had bloodied his own knuckles to protect his own and he's quick to react to threats. He's young, barely out of his teens, but he's vicious and ruthless and does it all with a smile on his face and Gavin on his hip. No one touches the kid when Ryan's around.

It’s been a year since Ryan moved in and Gavin still won’t speak. He babbles a lot, blows spit bubbles, and ecstatically points or walks over to the thing or person he wants.

But he won’t talk.

Geoff and Jack are in a mad race to get their son to say their name first. It usually involves bribery of the highest form, but it never works.

A small part of Ryan thinks he shouldn’t care, he’s just supposed to keep the kid safe, but he’s grown… Fond of the small family that took him in. So he comes home form the library with at least 10 different parenting books, all of them saying that children will speak when they’re ready.

“So you’re gonna talk when you’re ready, huh squirt?”

And Gavin, fist jammed in his mouth, blinks up at him with innocent eyes before giggling. He waves his spit covered hand around in excitement and says,

“Rye! Rye!”

The entire apartment goes silent at that. Had he? Did he just?

“Rye! Rye!”

Ryan cries as he scoops the toddler into his arms and though he threatens dismemberment if that fact ever gets out, Jack and Geoff can’t find it in themselves to really believe him.

Gavin is four.

It’s Jack’s birthday soon and Ryan is standing in the middle of Macy’s with Gavin perched on his hip as he scans the rows of handbags and necklaces. Right now the little monster is content to chew on his fingers and tug Ryan’s hair.

Jack had recently started her physical transition, now that they had the funds for surgeries she decided to bite the bullet and go for it, and he wanted to be supportive of her. Hence, staring at handbags and jewelry and wondering why he never thought to ask Jack what her favorite color was.

On his hip Gavin squeaks and slaps his hand on Ryan’s face.

“Okay, that’s it.” He says as he places the four year old on the ground, “You have legs. Use them.”

He still takes Gavin’s hand to make sure the curious boy doesn’t wonder off, “We’re buying a gift for mommy. What do you think she’d like?”

For a moment he thought the kid wouldn’t answer, but then he pointed at a display case and Ryan laid eyes on a gold necklace with green gems arranged like laurel leaves. It was simple, pretty, and would look nice against the dress she bought for herself last Christmas. If she and Geoff went out on a date it would be perfect.

“Good taste, Gav.” He said as they walked over to the case and politely asked for it.

He knows he still looks young, that the baby at his feet doesn’t help that image, but this is Los Santos and fuck if retail workers don’t already see too much weird shit. The cashier doesn’t even hesitate, just tells him the price and doesn’t bat an eye when he pays in cash.

All she asks is, “Do you want that wrapped?”

As they’re walking home Ryan knows they’re being followed. They aren’t subtle about it, not in the slightest, and Ryan feels more irritated than scared. Gavin starts to sing some stupid song he heard on Blue’s Clues and it’s then that Ryan feels a trace amount of fear. He tries to shake them, but what they lack in stealth they make up for in persistence. He’ll have to take them out then.

He turns to a parking structure that’s empty and surrounded by construction cones. The upper levels are unstable, but the city’s workers are stretched too thin and it’s sat abandoned for months. It’s the perfect spot for a confrontation. He rushes to hid Gavin near a part of the cement wall that’s fallen away. It’s a tight squeeze but Gavin is small for his age, he’ll be safe, out of the way, and out of sight.

“Stay here, okay? Don’t come out until I come to get you, don’t make any noise, and don’t look.”

“Is this real?” It’s their special code for when things are very serious and Gavin needs to be quiet.

Ryan nods as he tucks Jack’s present into his arms, “Very real. Hold onto this and don’t let go, okay?”

“Okay.”

When they come for him, Ryan is ready.

A part of him used to wonder if he should worry about how easily he kills, at how much sick joy he finds in feeling sticky blood on his fingers, but whatever innocence he had is gone now and he doesn’t worry at all. It scares Geoff and Jack, sometimes, at how efficient he is at his job, at how calm he is when the slaughter begins, at how effective his torture methods are. Sometimes he causes pain just to cause pain and that concerns and frightens them, just a bit, but they love him and how good he is with Gavin so they keep quite about it. They aren’t angels, they won’t try to act like them.

When he’s done there’s little left of the damn thugs. With their entrails and squares of skin thrown here and there the parking structure has turned into a macabre mural. He’ll have to come back later to burn the whole place down. They had screamed, but no one bats an eye at that anymore in Los Santos, he has time to hide the evidence.

He looks at himself, at the jacket stained with blood, at the boots that are sticky with things he doesn’t want to think about, and decides he should be cleaner about it next time. He shrugs off the jacket, wipes his hands off with the cleaner insides, and throws it somewhere he doesn’t care about as he turns to the crevice where he hid Gavin-

And he froze.

Gavin stood there, in full view, staring around him with wide eyes. Ryan closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He doesn’t mind that Geoff and Jack are scared of him, but Gavin… Gavin is different. He’s had the kid on his hip since day one, he’d changed his diapers and argued with him to eat his vegetables. They watched cartoons on Sunday together and giggled whenever Ryan made a funny face at him. He was the one person in the world not scared of him, and now he’d ruined that.

When he opens his eyes agin Gavin is still standing there, but… But he isn’t scared. He looks curious, a little grossed out, but not scared. He’s still looking at Ryan like he always has and a part of Ryan wonders if he should be concerned with that, but he’s too thankful to think about it too much.

Ryan walks over and kneels down so he can see Gavin eye to eye. The boy blinks up at him and then gives him a blinding smile. Ryan reaches out his hand and without hesitation Gavin takes it into his own.

Jack loves the necklace, and hugs both of them close, “My good boys.” She says and Ryan’s chest fills with warmth.

Gavin has just learned how to climb a tree when someone manages to sneak past his guardians. A loud shot rings through the forest. It doesn’t hit, but it scares the boy so much that falls from the branch he was perched on. They had all moved too slow and now their boy has a broken arm. The second Ryan reaches Gavin he throws himself over the younger boy, rears back, and fires into the trees where the bullet came from.

A body falls, limp and useless, to the floor. They don’t even bother finding out who he is, who he works for, because Gavin is more important.

At the hospital Gavin clings to Ryan, sniffling miserably at the doctor who sets his arm and places it in a cast. It was a clean break, she says, it’s a good thing they brought him as soon as the did.

“It’s Summer.” She assures the adults because all three of them are shaking like leaves, “Lots of kids get into things they shouldn’t. You aren’t the only ones who brought in an injured kid.”

She doesn’t know that someone managed to sneak past them, had known they were heading out into the woods for a picnic, had known exactly where to hide. Someone had known what they were doing.

Geoff manages to thank her. That night they pack up the house and Geoff uproots them to England. He hadn’t even asked Ryan if he wanted to go with them, had just told him to pack up his shit and be in the car in an hour.

Ryan was family now, he wasn’t going anywhere.

Gavin takes to England like a duck to water. He’s adapted to the lingo in a way his guardians haven’t quite figured out and he even has a strong Oxford accent.

He’s also now 14 and an absolute menace.

“It’s just a movie with my friends!”

“And I’m saying that you can go, but Ryan needs to go with you.”

And Gavin, honest to God, stomps his foot. Even in England, so far from the influence and notoriety Geoff had built for himself, Geoff is not someone to be messed with. The only one who can act so casually towards him is an annoying twig of a teenager who looks two seconds away from either crying or throwing a fist.

“I’m fourteen, Geoffrey! I can take care of myself!”

“You can barely lift the milk jug you asshole!”

Ryan thinks that now might be a good time to intervene. Usually Jack keeps the two of them in line, but she’s at the store and so it’s left to Ryan to be civil.

“Look.” He says, drawing attention to him, “Gav, you know that Geoff is right.”

“But-“

“And Geoff knows that you’re old enough to go to a movie by yourself.” He takes a deep breath, “So. We’re going to compromise. I will drop you off at the theater. None of your friends will see me, I promise, and I’ll go see something else at the same time. Does that sound fair to the two of you? I’ll be close enough if something goes wrong and Gavin still gets independence.”.

Neither of them are too happy with it, but they take it. Gavin comes home without a scratch and Geoff breathes a little easier.

Gavin grows up, he graduates from high school and no one knows who cries more Ryan or Geoff.

Shortly after Gavin’s 19th birthday they move back to Los Santos.

Ryan has changed, has finally grown into himself and cuts an intimidating figure. There are whispers in the street calling him Vagabond. The city learns to fear his black skull mask as much as they fear Geoff.

Gavin hates being useless and asks Jack to teach him to fly and Geoff how to drive. He asks Ryan to teach him to fight. Despite his sporadic methods, Gavin is actually a skilled pilot and Jack beams with pride, even though he’s a dunce with cars and hand to hand combat. His first experiment with throwing knives destroyed a lamp and Geoff has since banned him from trying it.

He’s on surer footing with long distance weapons, but he’s more talented with his words.

Gavin has been weaseling things out of them since he could talk, and for a while they all thought they gave in because it’s Gavin and despite it all he’s their kid and they love him. Except it works with complete strangers, with just a word or two Gavin is conning people for everything they’ve got: money, possessions, sympathy… You name it, he can take it.

Geoff tries him out as a front man for a negotiation with some up and comer who’s getting too close to Geoff’s territory. Gavin smirks his way through the meeting and he doesn’t just take what he wants, he talks until the other man is gladly giving everything they want to them on a silver tray.

Gavin is good, very good, and he’s a bit vain with that knowledge. It all goes fine, until he tries it on an older mob boss, one with more reach and influence, and the older man just laughs and pats Gavin on the head. They all bristle at that but he just smiles.

“You are good. But your eyes cannot lie.”

He takes to wearing sunglasses after that.

Slowly Gavin starts to change his look. His hair gets dyed blonde and styled with gel, he keeps his nails trimmed and buffed. He drapes himself in gold and wears button ups and skinny jeans to all his meetings. His smirk never falls.

And then one day it does.

Ryan’s been doing this for a long time, but getting shot still sucks. He hisses and drops to his knee, glaring through his mask at the assholes who have him surrounded.

“The mighty Vagabond. On his knees before me.”

“Oh fuck off and kill me already.”

The blow never comes. Blood sprays from the head honcho’s mouth and Ryan blinks, stunned, as he tumbles forward, an arrow stuck in his head.

What the fuck?

There’s chaos all around as, one by one, gang members drop like flies, each with a green shafted bolt in their heads. Gavin steps out from the shadows, glasses gleaming in the last as he flips his hair out of his eyes. In his arms is a crossbow, one he’d bought last week as a joke, and Ryan feels like his brain is running a marathon.

Gavin’s trademark smirk, the one that makes Los Santos gulp because they’re going to lose something and they can only hope it’s money and not something they actually care about, but now… Now Gavin is frowning as he drops the crossbow, uncaring of the clatter it makes, and he kicks a corpse out of his way as he crouches down to Ryan’s level.

“Are you okay?”

He’s never seen this Gavin before, the one who kills easily and so… Abruptly.

But then Gavin pushes up those sunglasses and he sees those hazel eyes looking at him the way he always has and Ryan’s heart melts. Gavin blinks once, twice, and then his mouth turns up into a blinding smile.

Gavin reaches out his hand and without hesitation Ryan takes it into his own.

#Fake AH Crew #FAHC #FAHC Gavin #FAHC Ryan #Fake AH Crew Gavin #Fake AH Crew Ryan

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callmethehunter · 5 years ago

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Maggie and Robert

Here’s a new chapter! I hope you like it. Thank you to @firethatgrewsolow for feedback and help with editing. As always, there’s a recap of the previous post, followed by the new material. RECAP: After a passionate and funfilled night on the beach with Robert, Maggie now has to face the music…aka her old man, Steve

End of Part 3: As Robert’s silhouette grew smaller in the distance, she knew that she needed to see him again. She simply HAD to see him before he left for the UK on Saturday. He was magical. The passion and connection that she had felt with him during their brief encounter was exactly what was absent with Steve and what she deeply craved.

When she lost all sight of Robert, her eyes swept over the skies. The sun was beginning to rise, dispersing the quiet darkness of the night...a night she would treasure always. She sighed wearily, turning her back to that golden sunrise as she headed back home to a man she did not truly love or even respect.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -Part 4: Steve and Schemes

Maggie slowly made her way back to the Bahia Mar just as the dawn lightened the skies. It was as if the sun was awakening from the depths of the sea to continue it’s restless journey. There was something about the light and the retreating darkness that made her feel exposed, unable to hide from others or from herself. With each step, closer to Steve, her dread mounted. She replayed the moments with Robert, reliving them as she put one foot in front of the other. It distracted her from the looming anxiety about having to face Steve and explain where she had gone off to the previous evening.

While she believed that honesty was the best recourse, she decided to make an exception in this case. Just this once, she thought. She rationalized that it was none of Steve’s business how she chose to spend her time, given that they weren’t married and he had no claim on her.

They had shacked up for convenience sake. Their initial arrangement had been that each of them paid half of all expenses, which then gradually became Steve paying a larger share. She had quit bartending at the Elbo Room back in January so she could attend community college.

But Maggie knew his cash flow came from dealing in weed and acid, not from a 9 to 5 job. In her opinion, it was easy money since the hippies had started congregating at the northern end of Fort Lauderdale Beach where housing was cheaper, granting Steve access to a booming clientele.

It was the age of tuning in and tuning out. Timothy Leary advocated the use of psychedelics such as acid as a means to spiritual and personal growth. The drugs practically came with an endorsement, for crying out loud and added to the Free Love movement that was spreading like wildfire especially now that the Pill was in greater use. In fact the media was touting last summer of 1967 as the Summer of Love.

Her internal dialogue was interrupted when she heard her name being shouted repeatedly. She spotted Steve sitting in the shiny red Camaro, his prized possession. It was one of the only vehicles in the lot this early in the day. He started the loud engine and practically peeled out of the parking space headed towards her.

Oh fuck!, she cursed under her breath. Here he comes... The smidgeon of peace that had remained from her magical evening with Robert went flying out the window, replaced by a deep annoyance at having to explain herself to Steve.

“What the fuck, Maggie!” Steve barked as he pulled up next to her. “Where have you been all this time? I was worried about you out there trippin’ all by yourself.” He gestured wildly towards the beach. “One minute you were there, then the next time I looked you were gone. Man, I thought you drowned! I sure hope it was worth it to keep me hanging like that,” he berated her.

Maggie’s tactic when he became this belligerent was to placate him and act contrite. “Steve, I know...I am so sorry you had to go through all that. That purple microdot was so strong I don’t even know what all I did, I just remember being at the Jetties, and laying down somewhere looking at the sky...probably for hours. The stars looked as if they were dripping wax from candles on the beach and the colors were so bright!”

She ventured a glance at his face, which appeared calmer. “You know how it is, babe, I didn’t mean to worry you.” See? she said to herself, telling half truths was not really lying, she rationalized again. But in her heart she knew that she was skating on thin ice.

“Yea, I know, that shit’s groovy, man, but you can’t just walk off and not tell me what you’re doing or where you’re going for hours!” The fact that his voice was back to a normal decibel was promising.

“C’mon man, get in the car. I’m starving thanks to having to sit there all fucking night waiting on you.” As usual, the crisis had become all about him.

“Steve, seriously, who are you kidding? You know damn well you and your friends were partying all night... You barely missed me, seeing as Shannon the chipmunk was hanging on your every word when I left.” She wasn’t buying his ”holier than thou, concerned boyfriend” crap. It might work on Shannon but it wasn’t going to work on her.

That must have been what happened, because Steve did not respond as he sped down AIA towards the House of Pancakes. By the time they pulled into the lot, they had toned it down. Steve had a short memory, probably from all the weed he smoked, and now that they were going to eat, his self-righteous attitude diminished. After they were seated, he studied the menu, commenting on what he should order.

Maggie breathed a sigh of relief. She had been right in only revealing where she’d been and not who she was with...Only the sexiest and most intriguing man she had ever laid eyes on, she said to herself. Had she divulged that small yet crucial detail, she would not have heard the end of it.

Yet Steve was the one who had brought up having an open relationship when they shacked up the year before. They were more like friends on equal footing back then but somehow he seemed to have developed a sense of ownership. Nowadays he acted as if he was her sugar daddy or had some claim on her. The longer she allowed Steve to finance her life, the longer she would be in this rut. She had become lazy and complacent. The realization deeply troubled her and she vowed to take action, once and for all.

After ordering a breakfast platter, Steve mentioned he had been looking at a boat that was for sale at the docks near the Bahia Mar. It was last year’s model, a 1967 Chris Craft Cavalier, he said, as if that would explain it.

“Well, tell me more about it. I don’t know much about boats,” she added, “except that some have cabins and some don’t.”

“Man, I gotta teach you about the finer details of boating! if I can get this dude to go down on the price. I think he will, seeing as I fronted him 100 hits of acid and some weed last week and he still hasn’t paid me.”

“You know what, Steve? One of these days somebody’s gonna screw you over so bad or you’re gonna get busted by the fuzz, man,” she chided him. “You gotta be more careful, people talk…”

“Maggie, shut the fuck up, you don’t know what I do or don’t do.” He spat out bits of the omelett he was chewing, with how forcefully he replied. “I've been doing this shit since I was 16, so for over 10 years now, I ain’t never had a problem...well, except with a Cuban dude that tried to rip me off one time. But anyway,” he continued, “I don’t have to do shit, you hear?”

She hated when he spoke to her with disdain, belittling her intelligence, sometimes right in front of his friends. Most of the time, she sucked it up and went with the flow, letting it roll right off her back. But lately, this type of behavior angered her and she had been growing increasingly resentful towards his snide remarks.

“Fuck you, too, Steve” she countered, setting her toast down on the plate, suddenly losing all appetite.

“Whatever...Look, Maggie, do you wanna go see the damn boat or not? You’re lucky I’m even asking for your opinion seeing that we’re gonna be spending a lot of time on it.”

“Oh really?” she replied, “what if I don’t like boating, did you ever think of that? What if I always get sea sick, huh?” she asked but he just looked at her, mouth agape.

“Steve, you know I don’t like it when the water’s really deep, you can’t just assume I’m gonna feel comfortable on that boat day in and day out…”

“Why not?” he asked incredulously. “You should see the cabin, Maggie. It’s got a full sized bed, mini bathroom and little kitchen. It’s sweet, baby, you’re gonna forget all about that you’re on the water...It’s gonna be like being in a camper on land. You’ll love it, baby.”

She cringed at the familiar way he disregarded her feelings, bulldozing over them and then pretending she had been the one to suggest whatever it was he manipulated her into doing. This was insanity! He’s never gonna change!, she realized.

Almost in a defeated tone, she answered “Yea, maybe you’re right, Steve. Let’s go take a look when we leave here.”

He reached over the table and patted her hand, “Thata girl. We’ll go right after I pay.”

With that, he signaled to the waitress to bring the check, took a wad of cash out of his pocket, and glanced over the bill.

Maggie looked out the window and realized they were only a few minutes away from Tugboat Annies.

She mustered up all her courage and nonchalantly asked “Hey, sweetie, if we were to get the boat, could we dock it over by Tugboat Annies? It doesn’t cost as much as the Bahia Mar and you can pull up through the intercoastal, dock it in the back, and you’re right at the bar....There’s actually a really good band playing this weekend,” she continued, “if we had the boat, we’d look so cool pulling up in it, right?”

She knew Steve well. He was a show off and loved to appear important. The idea that the hip people at Tugboat’s would notice his latest purchase was irresistible to him. His growing smile told her everything she needed to know, and her heart soared as she thought about seeing Robert again. She ached with longing for him. That gorgeous blonde, that sexy man.

She smiled back sweetly at Steve, proud of herself for having turned the tables and being the one who manipulated the outcome, making him feel he was still in control.

Her self-congratulation faded as a tinge of anxiety surfaced. Steve was a narcissist, that much was true, but he was no dummy and he was extremely possessive of her time. How was she going to manage making contact with Robert while Steve was hovering nearby? How was she gonna pull this one off?

Different scenarios ran through her mind. She suddenly realized that the answer lay in having distractions... Lots of distractions. They would put the word out and invite all his cronies out to the concert, in part to celebrate and party on the boat. People could step out onto the marina behind Tugboat’s and score, getting their stash for the week in the privacy of the boat’s cabin. She’d wait to suggest that part later…

After the waitress brought back the change, she grabbed her bag from the back of her chair, stood and followed Steve out of the diner, this time with a light heart and a bounce in her step.

To be continuied at Tugboat Annies....

#maggie and robert #robert plan fanfic #fan fiction #part 4 #chapter 4 #Steve and schemes #next up #the show at Tugboat Annies #will Maggie's schemes and plans actually work?#will she get another chance with Robert?

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itsclydebitches · 6 years ago

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Lovely Good Omens fandom! Many of you have asked for/mentioned having a text version of the Yelp reviews, which if I were a better person I would have remembered to include in the first place. Better late than never? So here’s a version below and I also threw this up on AO3 so there are options. For the record, I’m not at all trained in transcribing visual media, so if anyone wants to add to/edit/do whatever to this post, especially to make it more accessible, you have carte blanche to do so 👍

Also I typed this up in a hurry so, as always, apologies for any typos.

Tagging: @lethargicdolphin, @marithlizard, @pearwaldorf

A.Z. Fell and Co. Antiquarian and Unusual Books

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115 reviews

208 photos

I really love this place. I’ve been coming here since I moved to London, about twelve years ago, and it’s one of the most soothing bookstores I’ve ever had the pleasure of visiting. Yeah, you hear talk of weird things going on at Fell’s, but really? We could all do with a bit more quirky in our lives. And Fell provides that in spades: Annual plants that never seem to wither, let alone die. The smell of incense mixing with cocoa. Strange books tucked horizontally into the shelves, feeling like they have a touch of magic to them. Nonsensical conversations taking place in dark corners (I’m talking candid chats about the apocalypse and whether angels could actually bless all the rains down in Africa. I swear Fell and his boyfriend are the religion Mythbusters or something.) I’m going to sound like a total nerd here for a moment, but it feels like some sort of liminal space. You know when you were a kid and you were just desperate to receive your Hogwarts letter? Or find your own wardrobe to Narnia? That’s what walking into Fell’s feels like. Like you’ve finally found that portal and can stay as long as you like, provided you don’t try to take anything back with you into the ‘real’ world. Hell, maybe that’s why he won’t let anyone buy his books.

Robert T.

Union City, CA

4 friends

26 reviews

3 photos

There’s a snake?? In this shop?? A reALLY MASSIVE SNAKE????? What are y’all doing talkin’ about your meet cutes and shit someone call pest control!

Malini D.

London, United Kingdom

0 friends

48 reviews

99 photos

I’m not gonna pretend I have anything to say about whether this is a good bookstore or not, but if you ever want knitting help you should definitely stop by. Mr. Fell knows an absurd amount about crafts for a guy who looks like my grandpa and he’s now replaced Youtube as my go-to for alleviating “Omg please fix this how the hell did I manage to reverse the pattern??” panic. For the record, I didn’t just wander up to a random bookseller one day and demand that he help me salvage the ruins of my first sweater. I’d taken a seat inside to wait out a storm, had my messy sleeve stuffed into my purse, and he’d offered the help. Bit of a bastard about things like gauge and color--not everyone wants to wear tartan, dude--but you get used to that. He means well. Said I should come back to show him the finished piece, which I did. Things just kind of spiraled from there. He’s an absolute treasure trove of knowledge once you get him talking and a muffin to boot. If he were twenty years younger and in any way straight I would have asked him out in a heartbeat. As it is I’m considering setting him up with Grandpa.

Tiffany L.

London, United Kingdom

132 friends

312 reviews

34 photos

I’m not really a book person myself but I followed my wife in with our seventh-month old and was kinda embarrassed when he started making a fuss. Normally I’m full Badass Mom mode while in public--I’ve got a kid to feed, change, sooth, and you all can damn well deal with it--but this place was so quiet Liam seemed extra loud in comparison. I was about to take him back out when a man appeared out of nowhere. The owner I guess, based on how some of these other reviews describe him. Older gentleman with clothes out of some period piece. Anyway, he scoops Liam into his arms like he was born for it and started bouncing. Our fussy, temperamental, drama queen Liam settled in an instant and my wife got to browse to her heart’s content. I don’t know how he did it, but that man is an absolute angel. Full stars for that moment alone.

Gillian L.

The Hague, The Netherlands

283 friends

256 reviews

60 photos

Anyone know if the old Bentley parked out front is for sale?

Update: It’s really, really, really not

Billy H.

Austen, TX

40 friends

2073 reviews

774 photos

QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS QUEER BOOKS SO MANY QUEER BOOKS!!!

Gabriela G.

London, United Kingdom

3 friends

22 reviews

1 photos

Run by this delightfully frumpy guy who sometimes hands out biscuits from a sewing tin like my gran used to. He asked me if I was looking for anything in particular and I told him my name was Jared, I was 19, but sadly I’d never learned how to read. I have NEVER seen a man more confused in my life. 10/10 would meme him again.

Colie A.

Enola, PA

201 friends

2778 reviews

10382 photos

I’m setting the record straight here since there are a bunch of reviews claiming it’s just London folklore: there is a snake at A.Z. Fell’s. Must be an exotic pet he usually keeps upstairs because I’ve only ever seen it twice. Is it big? Yes. Scary? Fuck yes, but I’ve never seen it do anything more than give a warning hiss at this drunk who wandered in and started yelling. (Are snakes good guard dogs? This one is.) The other time he was just chilling on top of one of the shelves. Snoozing, I guess. I asked Mr. Fell if I could pet him and he said maybe after he woke up, but then I had to get to class and all.

Afraid of snakes? Steer clear. Otherwise I’d really recommend popping in and seeing if he’s around. Idk, maybe I’m just a snake fan but he looks super sweet and chill. Life is short. Boop the snake snoot.

Jeremy W.

London, United Kingdom

86 friends

409 reviews

12 photos

I live down the street from A.Z. Fell’s and let me tell you, this place is spooky as fuck. All sorts of weird lights and noises coming from it. At all times of the day and night too. Either this bowtie wearing bookworm has one crazy sex life or the place is haunted. Jury’s out on which.

Heather Ki.

London, United Kingdom

0 friends

3852 reviews

1 photos

This shop smells. Not that old book smell either, oh no, but like something is molding. I took my little Johnny in here to try and get him interested in something other than those damned video games and I walk into what smells like a whole cloud of toxic mold! My boy has a weak constitution as it is and if he comes down with anything I will be pressing charges, you mark my words.

Jo. W.

London, United Kingdom

32 friends

410 reviews

61 photos

Hey, does anyone want to talk about the fact that this place burned down last month? As in, completely up in flames, I saw it happen, nothing but a smoking husk afterwards? Does no one else remember this??

Tiggi N.

London, United Kingdom

32 friends

33 reviews

24 photos

Has anyone read this guy’s opening hours? I included a photo above: “I open the shop on most days about 9:30AM perhaps 10:AM. While occasionally I have opened the shop as early as 8, I have been known not to open until 1.” Absolutely insane. This guy’s a madman and I love him. If anyone actually manages to get into this place please let me know because I need to shake Fell’s hand.

Mackenzie J.

City Centre, Manchester, United Kingdom

807 friends

2592 reviews

13218 photos

I told my girlfriend this shop’s got a snake named Anthony and she didn’t believe me. Going back for proof next week.

Update: got the snake selfie!!!!!!!!

Penny O.

Chicago, IL

87 friends

557 reviews

16 photos

Caught the owner snogging some hot twink behind the cookbooks. Well done, my dude.

#good omens #ineffable husbands #air conditioning #good omens fic

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hillbillyhippiemusicreview · 5 years ago

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POST #24- J’s Year in Review 2019

Jesus Christ it’s 36 degrees and dark at 5:30. The most depressing time of year for me. I owe my friends a few reviews and keep putting them off. I’ll do them tomorrow. Hell, maybe when I have time over the weekend I’ll get that one out I promised a few weeks ago. Here I am, sitting on the couch trying to figure out which record I want to highlight next. It’s a daunting task. A lesson I’ve learned over the past year. I need to get those reviews out but my mind (and ears) get the best of me. What do I do instead? I listen to a couple of records and skip right to the end. What I mean by end is that cliche year in review article that all music journalists put out with their favorite artists, songs, records, and shows of the year. This is all new to me. Shortly after the new year I decided it was time for me to get in the game. I don’t have much to offer but I wanted to put my perspective on paper. My first article was a piece about Tyler Childers raising awareness and getting a large donation of bottled water for the citizens of Martin County, Kentucky. I knew about Martin County. I didn’t know how deep it went. It wasn’t the meet and greet and small solo set that made me want to write about my experience. It was Tyler’s words. It was the raw emotion and the choked up words that inspired me to be a writer. I wanted as many people to know about this event as I could possibly get the word to. Be it 5, 10, 20 or even 30 people that read the article and learned about the plight of the citizens of Martin County have been in for years. That maybe 5, 10, 20 or even 30 people that may learn how to contact their representative and ask questions. I hope it inspires people to learn about their community and lend a helping hand to those in need. That event was last year, but it inspired my path this year.

Let me begin by saying that I have met some of the most amazing people over the past 12 months. I will touch on as many of those people as much as I can. I am going to highlight the music that has moved me over the same amount of time. I’m gonna forget people. I’m sorry in advance. I could put a list of my top 10 albums out but that just wouldn’t be fair. To be honest, there is one album that stands head and shoulders above all others. It’s not even a competition. How do you compete with amazing art? I look at it like its a steady stream of good shit coming out and keeping my playlist full.

Album of the Year (Any Genre)

Sound and Fury - Sturgill Simpson

Why?

It’s f*cking amazing. Earth shattering. Ground breaking. LOUD!

Sturgill Simpson took everything you thought you knew about him and his music, threw it out the window of his muscle car, and backed over it about a hundred times. This man does not give a shit. I screwed up on my first listen. There are two ways this album should be heard. 1) On a turntable with the volume turned as loud as it can possibly go. 2) Watching the accompanying anime movie with the volume turned as loud as it can possibly go. Unfortunately I did neither. Most of my first listen was a track at a time on my phone or in my truck. Dead. Wrong. If I had it to do over again I would most definitely start with the anime.

I get it. Anime is not for everyone. If I could give someone a starting point with anime, it would most definitely be Sound and Fury. This album is The Wall of our generation. After my first listen I posted, “Album of the Year Any Genre”. I fully stand by that assessment.

Favorite Albums of the Year

This is where I will most definitely make someone mad or make myself mad for leaving off someone who deserves to be included.

Home - Billy Strings

Favorite Tracks: Away From The Mire and Watch It Fall

Country Squire - Tyler Childers

Favorite Tracks - Creeker and Peace of Mind

Stranger In The Alps - Buffalo Wabs and the Price Hill Hustle

Favorite Tracks: Buffalo’s Canon and Stewball

Between The Country - Ian Noe

Favorite Tracks: Barbara’s Song and Methhead

Seneca - Charles Wesley Godwin

Favorite Tracks: Hardwood Floors and Seneca Creek

Chris Knight - Almost Daylight

Favorite Tracks: I’m William Callahan and Go On

The Wind - Eric Bolander

Favorite Tracks: Closer to that Flame and Ghost

Josh Nolan - Kind Heart to Follow

Favorite Tracks: Makin’ Eyes and The Honeysuckle

Nicholas Jamerson - Floyd County All Star

Favorite Tracks: Patience and Floyd County All Star

High Expectations - Sean Whiting

Favorite Tracks: Melody and Misery

Songs Only A Mother Could Love - Wayne Graham

Favorite Tracks: By and By and Every Evil Thing

On The Hilltop - Nic Allen and the Troubled Minds

Favorite Tracks: Cheap Pills and Wine and For Heaven’s Sake

Cheap Silver and Solid Country Gold - Mike and the Moonpies

Favorite Tracks: Cheap Silver and Danger

The Gospel - The Local Honeys

Favorite Tracks: Amazing Grace and Let the Church Roll On

Full Moon/Heavy Light - Ona

Favorite Tracks: Young Forever and True Emotion

Trial and Error - Vintage Pistol

Favorite Tracks: Lay It Down and Leave Me Behind

The Pilot Light - Derek Spencer

Favorite Tracks: The Witches of Appalachia and Lit By Moonlight

We Fall, We Break - Walter DeBarr

Favorite Tracks - Wicked Eyes and We Fall, We Break

Alive at Hillbilly Central - Arthur Hancock

Favorite Tracks - Take Me Back To The Country and Kenton’s Outdoor Seating Area

Cuz I Love You - Lizzo

Favorite Tracks: Truth Hurts and Juice

I have to give a shoutout to some amazing visual artists for their work on some of these records. Jimbo Valentine and Colonel Tony Moore did an absolutely amazing job on the Country Squire album art. With Valentine’s futuristic hillbilly aura and Moore’s gritty comic book background, their collaboration is my favorite album artwork in some time. Honorable mention goes to Nashville Tattoo Artist, Squishy Eyes. His work for Billy Strings’ home is colorful and visually stimulating. I definitely want some skin art done by this guy!

Next. Let’s talk festivals. Jon Grace burst onto the scene this year putting on not one but two music festivals. Jon and I go way back. We’ve been to country shows, rock shows, heavy metal shows, nu metal shows, Ozzfest. You name it and we were probably in the vicinity. Laurel Cove Music Festival was Bell County’s first foray into the music festival scene and it started with a flash of lightning, then another, then a shit load of rain. An outdoor music festival being held at a beautiful natural amphitheater turned in to an indoor show in the conference room at Pine Mountain State Park. It was a tough decision to make, but in the end, it was worth every minute. The lineup came together in short order and provided us with two days of blistering sets. Jon then put together the FREE Cumberland Mountain Fall Festival in downtown Middlesboro, KY. Featuring local and regional talent for another two days of fun and music. 2019 set the bar high for live music in Bell County.

Festival of the Red is located in the heart of the Red River Gorge area and put on three days of camping and music. The only downside was that I was only there on Saturday. My buddies Blake and Dave packed in the truck with Dave’s little boy Waylon to make the two hour trip to Slade to catch up with old friends and new.

Master Musician Festival is a yearly mainstay in Somerset, KY. Tiffany Finley and company put together a stellar lineup year after year. My wife and I went for the day on Saturday and returned home with memories that we still laugh about months later. I first want to give a shoutout to the staff of MMF for enduring a brutal storm and having the integrity to cancel the headlining act in the face of severe storms. We were devastated that we missed out on a Jason Isbell set, but we are also blessed that we were not injured in a stupid storm. The party rolled on to Jarfly and into the wee hours of the morning.

This brings me to the granddaddy of them all.

Kickin’ It On The Creek.

The Roberts do it up right on Ross’ Creek. The 5th Annual Kickin’ It On The Creek held on Byron Roberts’ farm is something every music fan should experience once in their life. I went to Irvine in June to attempt to buy tickets in person. I left the house Saturday morning around 4:30. My anxiety hit when I got into town and parked and saw the line stretched nearly a half mile down the road. What do you do though? You hop in line! My friends Jon and Daniel arrived about an hour and a half ahead of me and were about 15 people in front of me. Throughout the morning we made conversation with both veterans and newbies alike. The vibe was jubilant. It was almost like a family reunion atmosphere, and this was just the presale. Long story short, about 3 hours later we get to the front of the line when Byron exits the store to announce the tickets were sold out. My friends who were 15 people in front of me were the last group in. It made me ill to realize I was that close. Never fret, the next step was an online sale that supposedly sells out in seconds. Over the next few weeks, karma would smile on us as we were able to purchase enough tickets so everyone in our group of friends were able to procure tickets. Now the wait.

I’m not a festival virgin by no means. I was fortunate enough to go to three Bonnaroo festivals in the early 00’s. Needless to say, I had an idea of the festival life. However, I can’t begin to explain the giddiness that my wife and I felt driving to the festival that Thursday evening in late September. We made it just in time to set up camp and catch Bedford Band and one of the acts I most looked forward to, Buffalo Wabs and the Price Hill Hustle. The family atmosphere was in full effect. We were home. On Friday we were treated to sets by a variety of artists handpicked by the Roberts family. Favorites included Luna and the Mountain Jets, Crownover, Laid Back Country Picker, Green Genes, Jericho Woods, Vintage Pistol, Magnolia Boulevard, John R Miller and the Engine Lights, Town Mountain, and the ‘Lectric Wooks. Saturday favorites included Abe Partridge, Padre Paul Handleman, Wayne Graham, William Matheny, Senora May, Ona, The Wooks, Arlo McKinley, and festival headliner Tyler Childers. I’m already thinking about KIOTC 2020.

This year was magical. I heard amazing music, saw amazing music, introduced my children to amazing music, and most importantly shared with with my wife. I met lifelong friends and have several shows to look forward to in 2020.

Upcoming shows I’ll be attending are The Wooks, Arlo McKinley, Eric Bolander, Charlie Woods and Deep Hollow, and Dave Shoemaker at the Bell Theater on December 21st. 2020 brings Morgan Wade/Kelsey Waldon, Town Mountain/Buffalo Wabs/Geno Seale, Billy Strings, and Sturgill Simpson/Tyler Childers. The festival circuit is also ramping up with dates set for Laurel Cove 2020.

-Josh Trosper

*This is an independent review. The Hillbilly Hippie Music Review was not compensated for this review.

*The opinions expressed are solely that of the author(s).

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primal-screamer-blog1 · 6 years ago

Photo

Ruby loved being under the red lights. She was Mexican and Japanese, a tiny, bronzed, energetic spitfire with wide hips and impossibly long legs. Legs that drove men from all over California to see in the flesh. And after hours on the 405 for a long L.A. weekend, flesh was exactly what they wanted. They’d line up and lay down hundreds for her to crawl into their laps, wrap her long athletic legs around their necks and writhe on top of them. And Ruby wasn’t the only one drawing a crowd; Seventh Veil was home to some of the most sought after women in Los Angeles. Between Ruby, Roxanne, Alexis, Lola, Kenzie and Jade, the headlining girls of Seventh Veil were just as well known, if not moreso, than the boys in the bands that they all dated. In their big cars, with their big hair, they commanded the strip, bringing in money, men and any excess they could ever want. Naturally there was a cover charge. “C’mon, what about $10? I got a 10.” Nikki pleaded with the bouncer, a tall, muscular man named Rob who wore all black and had a tattoo of a shark on his neck. “How you gonna afford to tip these girls if you can’t even get in the door, kid?” If it were anyone else, Rob would’ve had Nikki out on his ass for talking him down to half price. But Nikki had been coming around for as long as Ruby had been working there; all the boys in Motley Crue had. The rock n’ roll of the strip had quickly become the lifeblood of the clubs. He knew Nikki was trouble, but not the kind of trouble he would ever have to worry about. “I’m gonna tip, I’m just not gonna be here for too long is all. One dance and I’m out, I swear.” “Nikki! Please. Spare me the sob story. You could have any of these girls all over you for free anytime you want. Why are you trying to pay for a lap dance?” Nikki sighed and tried to look inside over Rob’s shoulder. He couldn’t see past the obnoxious fake smoke that fogged up the entryway. “I just gotta talk to Ruby.” “Yeah?” Rob laughed. “You and ‘bout every other red blooded male in California. She making you pay for it all of a sudden?”“I don’t pay for shit, man. Look, this is the only place I can talk to her without her trying to fucking kill me. I got a show tonight anyway, I swear I'm in and I’m out.” Nikki held two fingers up. Rob shrugged and lifted the red velvet rope separating the two of them. “You got an hour.” “You fucking rock, man.” Through the plaster Arabian palace archway and neon signage, Nikki made for the bar. If this conversation were going to go the way he wanted it to, he’d need their tallest, cheapest shot. Leaned against the bar top, Roxanne was on her break, sipping a diet coke and flipping through a copy of Cosmopolitan. “Nikki?” Her melodic voice called over to him. She smiled and waved him over with a manicured hand. Roxanne was a tall, slim strawberry blonde with big blue eyes and big tits. She wore white cowboy boots and a red one piece with blue and white fringe, a costume she’d come up with for her “American Woman” number that Tommy really loved. He also loved her freckles. Nikki wrapped her in a short hug and let his hand rest on her hip. “Hey Roxanne.” “You haven’t been here in a while , Nikki! Where’ve you been? Making Tommy wander out all on his own!” She had a sweet, southern accent that always made him smile. “I’m sure Tommy’s doing just fine without me.” “We make sure he has fun out here.” She giggled and sucked down nearly half her diet coke, letting out a tiny burp. It made sense that her and Tommy got on as well as they did. “Does Ruby know you’re here?” “Not yet. Was hoping to chill out a little bit before talking to her.” “You comin’ to apologize?” “Apologize for what?” He gave her a shy grin. “Oh c’mon, Nikki. You’re on the shit list and you know it. She told us all about what you did.” “She did?” He winced.“Been talkin about it since she got here.” She went behind the bar and poured him a tall glass of Jack and Coke. “On the house. You’re gonna need it.” “Is she that mad?” He took the mixing straw and tossed it in the trash, taking a big swing instead. “Boot in the head didn’t let you know?” “Okay. Point taken. I’m an asshole.” “Just say you’re sorry, Nikki. It’s not a big word. She’ll forgive you.” “Where’s she at?” “On stage, dummy.” Roxanne giggled and pointed behind him. Ruby was crawling down the catwalk towards the tip bar where a cute blonde boy held two twenties in the air. The room was full, men talking and laughing, pinching Alexis or Lola on their asses as they worked the room while Ruby danced. She wore a studded red leather harness on top of a black g-string pulled high up above her ass and a black satin bra. Her strappy black stilettos brought her tiny 5’3 frame to 5’7 and her long black ponytail, teased up high made her look even taller. Up in lights, she unfolded herself into a split to “Slave” by the Rolling Stones. She tucked the boys money into her g-string and fell back into him, laughing and wriggling in his lap. Next to him, his drunk friend howled and threw a handful of ten dollar bills on her chest. She pulled herself up on stage and spun around on the pole before pulling her bra down to reveal a set of black sequined pasties. She fell down into another split, tossing her bra at the high tippers. Nikki stood back and watched her. He’d seen her dance plenty of times before; they met outside three years ago trying to buy drugs from each other. Nikki always loved seeing a hot woman dance, but something about watching Ruby specifically was fun for him. She danced the same way she played music. When she took the stage, she showed something vulnerable and something wild that he’d never seen in a woman. Raised to adhere to strict social conservatism, Ruby was brought up in the elite high society of Manhattan. It was a complete accident that, while attending an all girls boarding school, she was introduced to Black Sabbath and AC/DC records. Every Tuesday after her SAT prep, Ruby’s mom paid a 19 year old college student to teach Ruby classical piano. In reality, she was learning to play ‘Crocodile Rock’ and memorizing the names of singers in metal bands. In no time, she was sneaking out to meet punk boys at hip, underground parties in Brooklyn where she saw bands like the Stooges and the Ramones. It was when the Germs toured through the city that a young Lorna Doom handed off a copy of California punk zine Flipside to Ruby. After that, she became obsessed with maps of Los Angeles and would harass the local record store to bring in X tapes every time she went in. When she turned 17, a boy she was dating put on a copy of a barely formed Black Flag’s single Nervous Breakdown. “Holy shit.” They were angry, they were weird and they were unlike anything she’d heard before. She packed her bags and sold her bike to buy a Greyhound ticket across the country. Seventh Veil was the first place that would take in a skinny 18 year old with no home, no references and no clue. After being at an all girls school for so long, she took to the locker room camaraderie immediately. She went from timid and awkward to bold and brash, someone unafraid who knew how to make space and make noise. Spinning around the pole or swinging a microphone, whenever Ruby was on the stage, she gave her all to stake her claim in what she’d built for herself. When she danced, Nikki could see all that liberation in the smile on her face. So it was a little disappointing to see that smile falter as she caught sight of him. She staggered a bit as they locked eyes and awkwardly moved to the other side of the stage, regaining composure away from his glance. When she came back around, Nikki had grabbed a seat up front next to the blonde and his friend. Ruby flipped her ponytail to hide her eye roll and crawled over to him. “What do you want?” She said just loud enough for him to hear, sliding down onto her elbows and pushing her ass in the air for the rest of the audience. “I wanna talk to you.” “No way. Go home, Nikki.” “How about a private dance then?” “Fuck you!” She pulled herself up onto her knees and tugged the straps of her leather harness down. Nikki placed a hundred dollar bill on stage. “Come talk to me.” Nikki didn’t seem to understand what he was asking. She stood up and threw one long leg over his shoulder and dragged his seat in closer. She slid down into his lap so that she straddled him, one thigh pressed up against his arm in a flexible fold. Her nipples, covered up with pasties, pressed against his chest. The guys next to them whooped and tossed stacks of dollar bills into Nikki’s lap as she wrapped her other leg around his waist. He was instantly hard. She tangled her fingers into his knotted black hair and purred into his ear. “Are you really trying make a scene, Sixx?” She pulled back and looked up into his eyes. His expression had a slight glaze, his mouth dropped open. His hands rested nervously on her hips. The answer, she could see from his hesitation, was no. Nikki was known for his impulse - it’s what they bonded over. They spent their nights buried in drugs and living out their highs with fireworks, bar fights and loud music, bringing them to early mornings of come downs, shivers and heightened emotions. Cocaine addled conversations birthed ideas for Motley Crue and eventually led to Ruby forming her own band, The Plastix. They talked books and broken homes, b movies and beat poets, deep dark fears and depraved, debased perversions. But whenever they would come too close, whenever things got too heavy, Nikki would pull away. He would tug up his sleeves and show his scars, recount memories to the point of tears, but if she ever moved to soothe him, he flinched. Nikki was always unknowingly crying out for help, but his problem was he never knew what to do once he got it. It was why she stopped giving him so many chances; she knew he would never take them. She felt bad for him. “Fine. Let’s talk.” She pressed her forehead to his and pulled away. She finished her number with a final upside down spin down the pole and motioned for Jade - a vampy brunette - to take her spot on stage. Ruby stepped behind the zebra print curtain backstage and emerged a few minutes later in a black sweatshirt and leg warmers with a drink in each hand. She led Nikki to the VIP lounge - a purple velvet couch and a clear lucite table tucked in a corner behind a velvet rope. Under the black light, she sipped on her vodka cranberry and pushed a refreshed Jack and Coke into his hand. “Got ya a bunch of cherries.” She commented, snatching one out of his drink and sucking the whiskey off it. “Thanks. I never wanna ask for them.” He pulled his black fringe over his eyes before doing the same. “You’ll empty half a bottle of hairspray onto yourself but you won’t ask for cherries?” “I don’t care if people wanna call me a chick. I just don’t want them thinking I’m a kid.” Ruby pulled his hundred dollar bill from her bra and slid it across the table. “Where’d you get the money?” Nikki made a face and quickly shoved it into the pocket of his leather jacket. “Tommy let me pawn his stereo.” He mumbled. “Nikki!” “I know.” “C’mon, you can’t do that! You don’t gotta….throw money at me anyway. I would’ve just talked to you afterwards.” “Without trying to punch me in the head?” “Okay. I get your approach.” She shrugged and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “But all I’ve wanted lately is to just talk to you. I really wish you would’ve just tried that. I don’t want your money.” He crunched up the bill in his fist. “I thought maybe I could just buy back what I stole from you.” He sighed. She wanted to yell at him more; tell him that she didn’t care about the drugs. She cared that he lied to her and used her. She’d seen him do it to enough people to feel stupid that she let it happen to her. She wanted to tell him how he made her rush to work even more hectic than L.A. traffic normally made it. She wanted to tell him about dancing with aching joints and having to wear a smile when you can’t feel the muscles in your face. She wanted to tell him that just because he wanted her attention, that didn’t mean he could fuck her over. But she didn’t. He already knew all of that. He was trying. “Why have you been so shitty to me lately?” He went quiet. There was hardly a time she caught him off guard that he couldn’t immediately divert his attention to scribbling in his notebook. He opened his mouth to say something and then stopped himself before chugging his drink. He was the one who wanted to talk, after all. “It’s weird for me that you’re dating Vince.” Ruby lifted an eyebrow at him before letting out a confused laugh.“What?” She snickered. “I’m not dating Vince.” “What are you talking about? Yes you are.” He knitted his brows together. She stopped laughing when she saw that he wasn’t. “I’m fucking Vince. First of all,” She leaned in closer to him and lowered her voice, taking on a more serious tone. “I don’t wanna date anyone. I deal with enough men here. I don’t-” She held up a hand and cut herself off before getting carried away. “Second of all, what does it matter? You fuck my friends all the time!” “Yeah! But-” “You were just fucking Jade in your freaky sex closet two weeks ago! She said it smelled like gouda cheese. I thought that was part of why we were friends, we hook each other up!” “I know. I know .” He fell back in his seat. “It’s just uncomfortable to me. I mean, it’s Vince . He’s so skeezy.” “You think I don’t know that? Look I told you, I’m not trying to marry the guy. We’re just having fun together. Nikki, why are you so concerned?” “I dunno, you’re not stupid, Ruby, why do you think?” For a moment, they just looked at each other and waited for the other to say something. When she didn’t, he sipped his drink and looked away. It wasn’t the first time since she’d known him that he looked so sad she wanted to kiss him. If only let him know that his feelings weren’t completely displaced. Instead, she leaned back with him and watched the spinning disco ball above them sparkle. Another thought in a long line of the same, she thought about a future with him and what that might be like. “You know you and me aren’t ready for this, right?” “Yeah.” He popped another wet cherry in his mouth. Something in his expression lifted when he looked back at her. He leaned into her shoulder, his teased up hair brushing into her face. “What do you mean?” “You know what I mean.” “I do.” He smiled at her. He pulled a knotted cherry stem out of his mouth and placed it in her hand. “I just wanna hear you say it.” “Please don’t make me.” She groaned to keep herself from laughing, not wanting to encourage him. She stuck his cherry stem in her mouth and swallowed it. He grinned at her. “I’m gonna make you.” She sighed and her smile dropped. She pushed the melting ice in her drink around with her straw. “Things are changing so quickly.” She let out a sarcastic laugh before nudging him off of her. “You don’t want a girlfriend anymore than I want a boyfriend, Nikki. Think about it. You wanna be a rockstar. You’re gonna go on tour and meet girls and make money. You’re not gonna have time to be with someone and you’re not gonna wanna be.” “That’s bullshit, though. You’re gonna do all the same stuff.” “Yeah, maybe. I want to. And I wanna do it without having to worry about when I’m gonna see you next or who you’re hanging out with or if you care who I’m hanging out with….I just don’t want it. I don’t want to do that to you.” “Well then, I don’t get why you’re doing it with someone else.” “I’m not. I don’t care about him the way I care about you. If we ever got close like that, I’d need it to be serious with you. And I’m not ready for that. You’re not ready for that.” He wanted to argue. Not because he had anything much left to say, but because he was still frustrated. He yanked his last cherry off its stem and sucked on it before swallowing it down. He wasn’t sure if he regretted coming here or if what she said made him feel any better. She wasn’t wrong and in a way, she told him exactly what he wanted to hear. That night, Nikki went back to the Whiskey-a-Go Go to play a show with his band. They went on 45 minutes later than they were supposed to, something Mick was sure to thoroughly blame him for. “Where the fuck have you been?” “Don’t worry about it, old man.” “Oh, I’m real fucking worried.” The crowd didn’t care. They came out for Motley Crue and stayed out with them long into the night, far past their last song. Particularly, a buxom redhead who reminded Nikki of his first girlfriend had stuck around the club long enough to come back with them for their nightly afterparty. She stayed tangled up in him all night. And when he went to bed with her, pounding her into the mattress, he heard Ruby moaning louder than she ever had in the room across the hall. Working his conquest harder than he normally cared to, he waited until he was sure he heard Ruby cum before unloading himself down the new girls back. He left her sticky and sweaty in the sheets to smoke a cigarette in the cool night air. Ruby was already out there. He thought she might be. His pressed his bare back to the brick wall next to her and pulled his pack out of his low slung leather pants. She was wearing one of Vince’s vintage car t shirts and a pair of black denim shorts she arrived in, her feet shoved into Tommy’s oversized sneakers. “You staying over tonight?” He asked her. She shook her head and handed him a lighter. “Nah. I’m almost on my way out. Just gotta find my shoes.” She watched him light up and made sure to grab it back before he could stick it in his own pocket. He pushed his hair out of his face and quietly exhaled, both of them choosing to listen to the Alice Cooper playing from a car down the street rather than speak. She watched the smoke dissipate in the air, the sounds of laughter carrying over from the strip just a block away. They both smelled of boozey sweet summer air. It was peaceful. For the second time tonight, Nikki felt like being honest. “You know, I can hear you and Vince. In my room. Mostly you.” He told her. Before she could say anything, he stumbled over an explanation. “It’s not a big deal. I just thought you’d wanna know, it makes it kind of difficult for me to uh...not think of you. In that way.” He stammered and immediately felt stupid. “Yeah?” She raised an eyebrow at him. She put out her cigarette on the concrete and exhaled her last hit. “Same.” She gave him a sly grin and slipped back inside. “Goodnight, Nikki.” Nikki went to bed happy that night. She was thinking of him too. ***fan fiction writers are creators too! we work really hard and put a lot of time into our stories. if you enjoy someone’s content, please consider leaving them a comment. it’s really helpful! thank you. Taglist: @triplehaitches

#motley crue #the dirt #nikki sixx #douglas booth #fan fiction #fanfic #fan fic #motley crue fan fiction #motley crue fan fic #motley crue fanfic #vince neil #tommy lee #mick mars

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