#THANKS ANON I OWE YOU MY LIFE

[missmungoe]

“You’re such a pretty man,” Makino sighed, touching her fingertips to his cheek, before rubbing his beard with her thumb. “Your wife is very lucky. Oh—hey.” Her whole expression brightened, her smile entirely cheeky. “That’s me.”

Shanks grinned, delighted. “You are absolutely hammered, aren’t you?”

“Hmm, I think I’m about to be.” She frowned. “Wait—was that not a euphemism?”

My masked Zorro, the unbelievably generous and tantalisingly mysterious Cover Anon, sweeps in once more with another gorgeous cover from Shanties, this time for Penelope (aka, the wedding fic, my beloved), by the incredible @sacred_pirate on twitter.

I...don't know how it's possible to capture the way a fic exists in my mind so perfectly it's like the artist reached into my soul, and yet that's what this feels like. This is one of the most beautiful artworks I've ever seen, and I can't believe it's from my fic, and this fic.

[tarabyte3]

Top 5 favourite fanfic tropes?

For my follow up I will allow you a light cheat:

✨️ Top 5 fics (any fandom/pairing)

and (if you would like)

✨️ Top 5 Andy blorbo fics

You know, those ones that live rent free in your mind and you find yourself coming back to even years later (also your choices don't have to specifically follow your trope picks!).

😘

Before I start, I want you to know I only saw the first bit in the preview and was like, "Oh that's fun!" And then got sneak attacked by the rest when I opened it 😂😭 Anon, I respect tf out of you for this, but also I'm going to have an existential crisis lmaoooo

✨Top 5 fanfiction tropes

- Mutual pining/"un"requited love

Especially if it's paired with angst 🤌 want them longing. Yearning, even. Throw in something like forbidden love to kick it up a notch, and, baby, you've got yourself a stew.

- Sex pollen

Particularly if they aren't in a relationship yet to add extra pining and angst. This is a sacrifice (I shouldn't want this). I would do this for you (please let me). I can't stand to watch you suffer (this will break me, but for you it's worth it). That and the smut of it all 😌

- Hanahaki

Being so in love with someone it's literally killing you. It's love made manifest so violently you choke on it. The pain and suffering would end if only you could let the words out, but the thought of rejection—of having to live with that instead—is worse than death. Plus, there's something a little beautiful and poetic about combining pain and suffering with love and flowers. Doom and bloom. Life and death. The Japanese were so real for this.

- Fake dating

I love it when they're both fuckin dying the entire time because they've caught a glimpse of the thing they want more than anything and it isn't real. It's bliss. It's torture. They don't want it to end, but it will destroy them to keep having it just out of reach.

- Getting together

A simple classic, but there's just something about two people falling in love and coming together in spite of everything. And if it's a slow burn? With constant missed opportunities and misunderstandings?! Staple crop of tropes.

✨ Top 5 Fics

I'm going to go with Qui-Gon x Obi-Wan (shocking, I know) because that is the bulk of what I have been reading non-stop so it's at the forefront of my brain. It was difficult to narrow down my 100+ bookmarks because there are SO many incredible works and writers in that fandom that inspire me, and some of them make me want to eat dirt. (I mean that as an exceptional compliment.)

- Shorelines by outpastthemoat

This is what Qui-Gon has done each morning for the past three days, returning to Obi-Wan with handfuls of treasures he has found: Bits of broken glass, polished by the waves, or intricately spiraled shells, a broken piece of chain; perhaps a stone as wide and flat as his hand. But he always returns to the shoreline the following day, and begins his search anew.

This is one of my favorite QuiObi writers (I would highly recommend ANY of her other works at the drop of a hat as well), and I have reread this fic at least once a week for months. Like, I have it open in a tab and think about it constantly. It's an introspective piece—an exploration of a connection and the peeling back of layers to try to understand what waits underneath. There's a beautiful sort of simple yearning, melancholy, and poetry to her writing that makes my brain go brrrrrr. So much is said in all of the things left unsaid. It's two parts of a series and they're both incredible.

- Malalignment by Tohje

The first time is a pure coincidence, all parties could swear it on their deathbeds. The pelta frigate GRS-20 - informally Generosity - is a huge, maze-like, rusting piece of a stronghold with multiple medical wards and cantinas. It is a sheer stroke of luck that 212th and the River Company are accommodated in the adjacent, overstuffed compartments and share the same cantina for their short recuperation periods. There is no thing such as luck, or coincidence, only war (and the Force, according to the Jedi).

Another writer that I adore who has multiple bangers. This one is an AU where QuiGon lives and is part of the Clone War, but in the most Qui-Gon way possible. Combined with Obi-Wan's lingering hurt from the situation with Anakin, the war, and a several year estrangement and by god it's delicious angst. Plus, I love self-sacrificing depictions of General Kenobi. (The smut is also very good)

- That Cold Affliction by Orphan Account

Obi-Wan tries to surprise his Master on a mission with few comforts by making Qui-Gon's favorite tea. Or trying to, at least. As it turns out, tea is a . . . complicated affair. (A little bit like love.)

Short and bittersweet. Forbidden love. Beautiful angst. I'm so sad I don't know the original author because I've seen several of their works pop up that are also orphaned (they have a very specific summary style) and they're all so good and full of similar themes, but I have no way of seeing if I've missed one or not 😭

- Taking Root by sanerontheinside

Obi-Wan thought he was terribly obvious, really. Qui-Gon thought it was Obi-Wan’s secret to share or keep, as he wished.

*banging pots and pans together* QUIOBI HANAHAKI!! This author does a deep dive into the affliction and combines it beautifully with Star Wars world building, plot, and characterization. It's everything I could want from the trope AND the pairing. They're also another one of my favorite writers. And if you're looking for an abundance of excellent smut, you'll absolutely find it in their body of work.

- How to Grow Vegetables and Alienate People by Meggory

Why had Obi-Wan agreed to this? He had exactly no experience growing anything—hell, he'd killed a cactus once, and he'd heard someone say that was impossible—but now he was taking over Bant's community garden share so she didn't feel she had wasted $150 on the plot? He had $150. He should have just given it to her and told her to get blitzed on the plane.

Cute modern AU with a funny af meet cute, excellent characterization, humor, and a simple, lovely plot of two idiots falling in love. Oh, plus gardening. 😌 AND Qui-Gon has a dog. It's the soul comfort food of fics. This author does an incredible job with AUs (pssst you like time loops?) that are great stories so it was very difficult to pick just one!

✨I both adore and dislike this last part. Because on one hand, it gives me the chance to brag about and hype up my friends, who are not only kind, wonderful people, but also very talented writers that deserve it and more. So I truly appreciate you so much for that. On the other hand, there are more than 5 of them that have written Andy Blorbo fics, and some of them have multiple stories and blorbos. And we've all gushed over or discussed many of them at length with each other, so they hold a particular fondness in my heart. Choosing only 5 from that feels like an impossible task.

So I WON'T be narrowing down my top 5 (I'm so sorry, anon, I'm not god's strongest soldier), but I will be taking the opportunity to drop their Masterlists/AO3 accounts 💖😌😇

afogocado | Alfred Pennyworth

amywritesthings | Kino Loy

citrus-moonlight | Ulysses Klaue

eupheme | Alfred Pennyworth, Ulysses Klaue

squidlywiddly87 | Kino Loy, Ulysses Klaue, Liam Black

stargirlfics | Alfred Pennyworth (+ lots of Alfred and Klaue headcanons and blurbs!)

tarrenterror | Alfred Pennyworth, Ulysses Klaue (+ Alfred, David Robey, and Kino headcanons, blurbs, and edits)

viceofdionysus : Alfred Pennyworth, Ulysses Klaue

[sickficideas]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/55889791/chapters/141918550

Have you read this one yet? Its short but its sooo cute

Anon thank you so much for sending me this wahhh😭😭😭 This is one of the cutest sskk sickfics I've ever read, the author writes them so perfectly 🥺💖 and sick Atsushi is so rare 🥺🥺💖

Here is the link for easy access for anyone who wants to read it too, please give it some love !!! It's so good !!! 💖💖

[ratatatastic]

idk if it's obvious but in the forsy offseason training vid the reporter asks "how do your legs feel, you know, for a man who, well, some see as a greek god" and forsy is just hand on hip staring off fondly in the distance he knows damn well who some is like even at home he's never living that ekky thirst quote down linked together forever just how ekky drew it up

OH YOU GOTTA BE FUCKING KIDDING ME

MAN HAUNTED BY HIS PARTNERS HORNINESS EVEN IN SWEDEN IM GONNA CRY EKKY LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE THIS MAN IS GETTING HARASSED IN HIS OWN HOMETOWN OH MY GOD CAN HE NOT HAVE PEACE

[plulp]

Eden swapped with Avery sounds like a nightmare for me idk why

Eden the businessman

Avery the hunter

Idk i really can’t think of anything - anon.com

thank you all three of you im so sorry it took me so long to do this i just had absolutely no ideas 😭😭😭😭😞😞😞 i hope you all like this!!!!

[gojoest]

Very NSFW

Idk if you saw this(it’s kinda popular) but https://x.com/urusoup/status/1797369940455907630?s=46 I thought you might like it🤧🤧🤧

link

in my mouffff 😍😍😍😍😍😍

[destructive-delight]

of all the things youtube has picked up on its way down the cliff into the advertiser friendly algorithm hellscape that it is now, giving creators the option to heart comments is probably the only feature i truly consider an unambiguous improvement that i appreciate from both a commenter and creator perspective. wish more sites would offer that.

[ms--lobotomy]

You wanted Magnus smut?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/53570320

I've been sitting on this ask because I don't know how to properly articulate how much I love this one. Here goes.

Ahem.

MAGNUS! MAGNUS! MAGNUSSSSS RAAAGHGHHGHGHHGHAHGAHGHAGGHG (gnaws at the bars of my enclosure) PLEASE MAGNUS HAND IN MARRIAGE!!!! (stick figure violence) I WONT BITE mmmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMM MMMM M M M M

[spearxwind]

can hades made shapes out of his fire. breathin out lil firey hearts

He can now! :] (it's involuntary though)

[acrosstobear]

undefined

@.callum_ilott Driver life

+ bonus callout comments:

[daylightdelirium]

omg consider: Kunikida scolds Atsushi for not taking care of himself and coming to work sick & he doesn't really pay attention to Atsushi's sniffling cause he thinks he has a ranny nose... Then notices he's crying because he feels so weak and pathetic

AUUUUGH YES god the kunikida "cares via aggression" + atsushi "was taught to interpret any aggression as a threat" makes me deeply unwell ... Kunikida's upset because he doesn't want Atsushi to hurt himself but Atsushi sees it as Kunikida being disappointed in him and he just totally breaks down 💔💔💔 waaaah

[the-eclectic-wonderer]

This is the drinks anecdote in fuller picture: "at the end of the night, she said "I want a drink" and I looked at her and I was yknow awed and I said "a drink drink or- or water?" "a drink drink" and there was nobody else around! it was meant for me! and I could've at that point gone "hey let me get changed and I'll see you" but instead I went (flustered) "ohhh! uh, well, you know, good night" that type of thing. and I missed a chance to have a drink and be a friend instead of an idol worshipper. and it was a missed opportunity I've regretted my whole life that I didn't take the chance and get to be her friend as opposed to an acolyte, a worshipper. we talked after that for years, off and on, often meeting at the theater or something and we were always very nice to each other and she was always very warm, she was lovely to me, but I couldn't step over the threshold of being in awe of her. and we could've been really good friends, I think."

Anon. Anon. Holy shit. You are giving me life. This anecdote is watering my crops and clearing my skin. I need you to know that I re-read this ask an embarrassing amount of times before I finally gathered my wits enough to attempt a response.

I just. Can you imagine. Beatrice Arthur. Telling you 'I want a drink'? Just writing it down is making me lightheaded. what the hell. what the hell. Lynnie Greene you are stronger than me just for the fact you didn't drop dead right then and there.

And her answer oh my god. 'A drink-drink or water'? Lynnie you're killing me I love you girl. Absolutely legendary response. The incarnation of gay panic. I have no words except iconic.

And Bea told her 'a drink-drink'? Like I just. Picture it. You're a young actress with a veneration for this legendary star of theater and television. You get a gig to actually work shoulder-to-shoulder with her (which is already. holy shit.). You're in the dressing room with her and this lady tells you she wants a drink. a drink-drink. you're the only people in the room. she can only be talking to you. Like are you seeing the mental picture i physically cannot be coherent about this. are you kidding.

Anon this is incredible information. Pride month has literally just started and this is already my favourite moment of it. Scratch that -- this is going straight to my year-in-highlights mental gallery. You're the hero of my pride month and I'm forever grateful. Holy shit.

[c-hrona]

C-can I ask Cheshire and Alice with n. 7 for the mistletoe thing >////<

:3c

[fang-of-the-weak]

what if milgram was 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂gram and instead of voting prisoners guilty or innocent we voted tjem out into space like among us

...Is this an actual language that you're speaking to me?

If so, turning MILGRAM into "𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂"GRAM would completely void the system of all its purpose- the point of it is to judge sinners outside of the corrupted justice system of our world. By turning it into such a concept, you would instead be trapping anyone deemed abnormal here, rather than murderers.

...

Voting prisoners into the vacuum of space would be sentencing them to death. I was under the impression that all of you despised the idea of ending someone life as punishment...am I incorrect?

(And what on earth is "among us"?)

[familyvideostevie]

🍇 fmk: 30 year old Joel, 52 year old Joel, and 56 year old Joel

i thought about this for a full day. here we go. i am not taking questions at this time.

f: 52 year old joel

m: 56 year old joel

k: 30 year old joel

join the celebration!

[butterfilledpockets]

*puts you into freezer to avoid melting*

I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S THAT HOT AT YOUR PLACE, BUT JUST IN CASE

THANK YOU [insert drawing of butter in freezer happi]

god I wish I could fit in a freezer irl now, it's not the weather fortunately (am abroad in cooler climate) I have suddenly become quite ill for no reason other than god's lazy plot