#TAKE A FAN. i kid you not. those things are like fucking greenhouses

[captainshadowshifter]

Guess who got ill and had to miss pendulum, within temptation, evanescence, carpenter brut AND fucking bmth 🥲

[theleftovertaco]

You Were Maid For This

There is an increasing amount of boys on tiktok in maid costumes, and when someone dressed up as Malfoy in a maid outfit, I had to write this (if you want the video just send an ask and I’ll send you the link). Here we have Fred, George, Harry, Ron, Neville, and Draco. Just a heads up, some of the details are purposefully vague so that the reader can be interpreted as being from any house, in any year, and of any gender, if i trip up or you think there is a way i could improve, please let me know since i finally have asks and submissions enabled

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Whoever decided this was a good idea.... was absolutely fucking correct

It was you, you decided it was a good idea

You darted into the great hall, sat down, and told Colin Creevey to set up his camera and to not be a snitch, and then you waited.

Fred and George came first, and to an onslaught of laughter and a little bit of applause.

Because low and behold, they came in wearing matching maid outfits. 

Pink. Frilly. Fucking. Maid. Outfits.

“We wanna know”, George said as he plopped down on your right, “who thought it would be funny to take all our clothes in the middle of the night and leave us with only THESE!” You stifled laughter by shoving a piece of scrambled egg in your mouth.

Fred tilted his head your way from the other side of you. “You think this is funny, do you love?”

“I find it to be the purest form of comedy.”

“Ugh” came the simultaneous replies, “This has to the fluffiest thing I have ever worn.”

“I don’t know”, laughed Harry, “the cat ears just bring out your eyes so well!”

He got identical middle fingers in response.

“Maybe you should just work with it, not against it” , Hermione interjected her two sickles into the conversation, “try to rock it.”

“Rock it?” They both titled their heads a little to the left.

“It’s a muggle expression, when a person tries to make a style work even if they’re not fond of it.”

“Ah.” Came the reply from your left.

“Maybe we should try to, uhh, rock it.”

You giggled and turned to Colin, “You two have fun with that, in the meantime, would you mind taking a picture, I’d like it for blackmail material.”

“Colin, you take that picture and I smash your camera.” Fred’s threat fell on deaf ears and after the image was pointed out on Colin’s new Polaroid you took the image, fanning it as you slipped 5 knuts into the small boys hand.

In McGonagall’s class, the boys flounced into class and immediately began flirting with the other boys in class.

“Weasley and Weasley, sit down before I turn the dress green!”

“Professor, that would clash with our hair.” A stern look silenced George pretty quick and they both sat down, though after they did McGonagall had to turn around to hide a smile.

Professor Sprout let out a booming laugh when they entered greenhouse four and simply shooed them to their stations. The Dittany plants they had planted into the plant beds saw that the white of their costumes were freckled with brown, but a quick scourgify from Sprout and they were good as new.

She sent them on their way with a comment that they, “look adorable!”

Flitwick couldn’t say much, he fell off his book stack laughing when they walked in and stayed on the floor for half and hour.

Charms class was excused for the rest of the day since their professor couldn’t calm down.

They reconvened with you for study hall in the courtyard looking a little too pleased with themselves.

“I take it people liked them?” You shouted across the yard.

“Yeah, Flitwick couldn’t stay on his stack.” Fred grinned.

“Well, I really must say, you both look very pretty.” They both laughed but you didn’t miss the way their cheeks flushed at this very different compliment.

“Yes, they look very pretty, don’t they”, Malfoy sauntered across the courtyard, “It’s such a manly look for them. Very fitting, since you two are too stupid to get any job outside of being janitorial staff.”

Fred nearly growled and you and George had to pull him to sit back down on the fountain ledge. 

“Don’t worry, he’s next on the list.” You whispered. Identical mops of red hair whipped towards you.

“It was you!” came the in unison exclamations.

“Of course it was me, who else would it be!”

“Y/N!” Fred bemoaned.

“How could you betray us like this?” George was howling like he’d just been stabbed. 

“I wouldn’t call it betrayal, just a bit of fun.”

“How did you even get up to the common room?” Fred was incredulous.

“You should know by now that I know how to get past those charms.”

“Ok, we’ll admit that was pretty funny.” George replied.

“Thank you, I try. Just make sure you don’t tell anyone else yet.”

“Of course. So, where are our clothes?”

“You’ll get them back when I’m finished with the prank. Bye you two.”

You got identical “NOOOOO”s as you left the courtyard.

2 down. 4 to go. 

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                         “Creevey! Same drill as yesterday.” Colin nodded and whipped out his camera to get it ready.

“You might wanna hide for this one, I doubt Malfoy would appreciate you taking his picture in this state.” He promptly ducked under the table until just the lens peeked out above the table. 

Draco stomped into the Great Hall, sat over at the Slytherin table, and huffed as most of Gryffindor let out thunderous laughter. 

“Whoever did this will be on the very unpleasant end of an unforgivable when I find them!” You could barely hear him above the giggles. 

“Mr. Malfoy, I know I did not just hear a threat from you?” McGonagall walked past the table and let out an affronted sound.

“Er-...of course not professor.” She hmphed and walked off.

“I don’t know Malfoy, maybe this could be good for you. This is what you get for making fun of the twins.” Fred and George nodded next to you, still in their outfits from the other day.

“Shut it, Y/Ln. If this was you I swear to Merlin.”

“I will admit to no such thing.”

Draco, unlike the twins, very much did not rock the maid outfit. Flitwick had finally gotten over his laughter and could teach as normal, but Professor Sinestra couldn’t help but let out a chuckle when a very grumpy Malfoy stepped up the astronomy tower with a few Gryffindor students trailing after him, making some rather inappropriate jokes about his backside.

Snape merely grumbled that his costume better not interfere with the lesson and moved on.

“Ok.” Malfoy finally sat down at your table in the library, “I concede, now please give me my clothes back.” 

“I have no clue what you’re talking about.” You said with a sinister grin. 

“Y/Ln!!!!” he groaned. 

“It's not that big of a deal. So you wear a dress. Guys can wear dresses.”

“Doesn’t mean I want to!” he yelled, before being shushed by Pince. 

“You know”, you began to speculate, “I think you’re arguing to deflect because you don’t want to admit that you actually like wearing a dress, even if it’s just a little bit.”

There was only silence in return and you smirked.

“You get your clothes back when I’m done with my prank.”

“Thank you. One more thing.”

“Yeah?”

“Can you change my outfit to be green? Pink is not my color.” 

“I disagree, but fine.”

Halfway done. 

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By day three, many of the boys at Hogwarts held the mild fear that they would be next to have their clothing swapped. 

Creevey had also picked up on the drill at this point.

Ron and Harry were next. 

You knew Harry would at least try to be a good sport. Ron, on the other hand, was a bit more of a wild card and you were a little nervous for his reaction.

“What. The. FUCK!” He whisper shouted when he got to Breakfast, slamming his hands down on the table. Harry chuckled and sat down next to him.

“So we were the next victims, hm.” Fred and George must have told Harry it was you, since he looked you way and playfully glared and stuck his tongue out at you, which you happily returned.

“Mature, Y/N.”

“You started it- wait no, ok now I hear it.”

“I swear to Godric Colin if you take my picture in this I will end you.” Ron snapped as the kid squeaked and ducked down, but the click of the lens appeared nonetheless. 

Harry and Ron went about their classes trying to attract as little attention as possible. Flitwick was used to the skirts at this point and merely smirked and asked the boys to sit down while commenting they should be careful with the lace collar since it was delicate.

During quidditch practice, Harry and the Twins did have a bit of trouble flying with the dress, since some of the other players and onlookers made comments from below. 

“Oi! Stop peeking!” Fred shouted at a third year girl who giggled and scurried off.

Professor Trelawney stared at the two before claiming that the fates told her to advise them to wear a blue dress the next time. 

“Harry told me it was you.” Ron huffed as he slumped down in the grass by the lake near you. Harry sat down shortly after.

“It’s not that big of a deal. Honestly, I think you look cute in it.” Ron blushed at the compliment but didn’t say anything more. 

“I’m guessing we won’t be getting our clothes back for a while?”

“You’re catching on. Only one more day. The last person is tomorrow and then you get your Friday off from wearing it.”

“Oh thank Merlin.” You heard Ron sigh in relief.

1 more person left.

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If we’re being honest you were most worried about Neville. That’s why you wanted him last, so he would only have to deal with it for a day in case it backfired. Also so that Malfoy couldn’t say anything because he would also be wearing his.

Neville kinda just shuffled into the Great Hall, and then darted over to the table where he wolfed down his beans on toast before rushing back out to hide until his next class.

“Neville!” Harry and Ron ran after him, dresses jumping back and forth as they left.

It was doubtful you woulf see anything from them directly, you didn’t share any classes with Neville on thursdays.

Ron and Harry would have to catch you up afterwards.

You met back up with them at dinner.

“You ok, Neville?” He offered a sheepish smile and nodded.

“Harry and Ron said I’d be ok and that no one else could really say anything.”

“Snape just said not to be ‘any more of a nuisance than usual’”, Harry interrupted with a shitty impression, “ Binns was too interested in his fucking textbook to make a comment, McGonagall called the three of us ‘adorable’ and Dean and Seamus keep playing with our ears!” He batted away Seamus’ hand for what probably was the 40th time that day.

“Well, Neville, what did you think?” Eyes turned towards him and he blushed bright red.

“I”, he paused for a second, “it was fun, I guess. It was kind of funny seeing Malfoy in them.”

There was a slight pause, and then.

“I guess I’d do it again. Not the outfit but the dress or skirt. Maybe even the headband. Just not as fuzzy.” Neville looked down and kinda whispered the last part.

“I would too.” Ron, surprisingly was the next to admit it and from there came a round of agreements at Gryffindor table.

“Well if we’re being honest I think that George and I did indeed rock it.” Fred said as he dug into his pot roast

“That you did. If you lot want, we could go to a shop next Hogsmeade weekend, take a look around for some other skirts?”

You got a round of “yes”s and the conversation turned elsewhere.

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“Hey,” Malfoy dropped into the seat next to you during study hall, “ how are you.”

You squinted at him.

“Fine? Why are you being so weird? You’re never nice.”

“Er, well, I mean I was hoping...that maybe... perhaps...”

“Spit it out Malfoy!”

“Could you take me to get a skirt?”

What?

“It’s just, after the first day, I kinda liked the skirt.”

You glared at him for a second.

“Yeah, ok, meet me at Hogsmeade entrance next month and we’ll go. Everyone else is going so play nice.”

He thanked you and left quickly.

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“Well, you all look beautiful if I do say so myself.” You said as they each stepped out of the changing room wearing their skirts. Fred and George twirled around, Harry and Ron did a little dance, Neville jumped around a little bit, and Draco shifted his weight from foot to foot.’

“Well thank you love.” Fred skipped over to you in a plaid circle skirt, “I will say I prefer this skirt to the poofy one in the maid outfit.”

“You like the skirt, huh? You could even say you were maid for it.” You offered with a sly grin

“Why are you like this?”

“Nooo!”

“Shittiest pun ever.”

“Whyyyyy!”

“Please never speak again.”

“I literally hate you right now.”

Well, you win some, you lose some.

Tag list:

@omg-imatotalmess

[ill-skillsgard]

Bred For Blood - Part 19 - Promise-Promise

Title: Bred For Blood

Warning: 18+ - sex/mature language & themes/gun violence/substance abuse etc. *mentions of coma/unconsciousness, injuries, and sex in this part*

Characters: AU Axel Cluney, AU Ivar Lothbrok, AU Valter x OC

Description: A bright, young survivor meets an acid-gun slinging headhunter with a knack for melting faces and connections to a prodigal Utopia embedded in the heart of a deadly forest. Violence and passion incite a battle of fealty while betrayal nips at Zed’s heels.

Note: Sooo many feelings in this part, you guys. Next part will be the finale! My gosh, it’s actually coming. Stick around because it’s gonna be a doozy! Much love to all the readers who’ve waited patiently and shout out to any new readers who’ve taken the time to let me know their thoughts. I appreciate all the comments and reblogs forever! With that being said, please comment and reblog. It’d really make my day. XO

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18

Zed waited for Vee next to the window overlooking the vast green ocean of vegetation. The sliver of sun painted the sky aflush, rolling west in shades of violet. Pinprick stars perforated the melting spectrum, and the phantom moon showed its impatient face fully before the horizon swallowed all light. It was a soothing array of scenery, and Zed rested her head on the glass until footsteps drew her attention to the door. She smiled as Vee came in carrying a plate of zucchini fritters and mashed chickpeas, returning the warm greeting silently.

"Hungry? Axel wasn't a fan. He wants a cheeseburger from McDonald's," said Vee, handing the platter to Zed.

She accepted the dish with a nod. "Did you tell him why that's not possible?"

Vee sighed. The dark beneath his eyes seemed permanent now. "I didn't get into detail. He wouldn't understand."

"Shouldn't we make him understand?"

"It's too soon. The big lug just woke up. It was a challenge just to get him to lie there. Soon he'll want to leave the lab, and I don't know how he'll fare around his adoring fans."

Zed bit into a greasy fritter and scooped a dollop of the paste with the leftover crescent. "He'll love the ego-boost, I'm sure."

"That's what I'm afraid of. All those people will confuse him. Who knows what that might do to his head. We're in a delicate situation."

"Axel seems to like me. Maybe I can convince him to stay put."

Vee grimaced from the thought of Axel working Zed over with his motoring mouth and crass sense of humour. The scientist had grown accustomed to nights alone with her, cooking together and discussing their future. The night they'd spent alone in the greenhouse rang in his heart; the night he admitted his feelings and begged her to squash them. The thought of her alone with Axel picked a scab he didn't know he had.

"You're worried about something," Zed said.

Vee snapped from his bittersweet reverie and sighed. "Am I ever not worrying?"

"True," Zed snorted. "Now, eat. I can't finish this all myself."

The pair finished the plate before Vee set the dish aside and motioned her to the sofa.

"We need to talk about what we found in Glott's notes. I know we can't test this theory, but we should treat it as the truth," said Vee.

"Okay, well, if that's how we're approaching this D negative blood sample... What's the next step? We have no medical supplies. I checked the med tent in the courtyard for the third time just for fun."

"Then we have to visit Glott and get some answers. And by we... I mean me."

"Valter—"

"I know you don't want me to leave, but what other option do we have? Every day we waste here is another step backward."

Zed shook her head until a thin braid dislodged from behind her ear and swung in her face. Vee resisted the urge to tuck it back. The girl's face swivelled toward the window, and she pondered and watched the premature stars twinkle across the bruised sky.

"We go together," Zed said firmly. "I won't budge on that."

"And what about Axel?"

"We wait until he's better. We'll need him to navigate the way."

"And if he never recovers?" Vee asked.

"Then we go anyway. All three of us. We get Axel better, and we go together."

Vee inhaled through his nose as Zed screwed her eyes into his. When he nodded, a smile unfurled across her face, shadowed by the last drops of brassy sunlight.

"I hate this plan, but I suppose it's all we have," said Vee.

"Promise we'll all stick together."

"Of course, Lea. I won't leave without you guys. Promise."

"Promise-promise?"

"I double promise with a cherry on top. Stick a needle in my eye and call it macaroni."

Zed stifled laughter beneath her palm. "I think you've been hanging out with Sam too much."

"That, or I'm just tired."

"I'll let you sleep now. You look beat."

Vee twisted his mouth in lopsided agreement. "Yeah, you're right. I'm gonna hit the shower first. Unless you want to?"

"No, you go ahead. I'll stay here a little longer," Zed said as she laid her temple against the cool glass and looked out over the forest floor, now drowning in the twilight.

~*~

In the morning, Zed left the apartment and padded down the hallway in her mismatched slippers. She slowed as she turned the corner and found the brothers talking. Axel's eyebrows were locked in a line, and Vee looked up at her with relief.

"Lea, can you help me explain to Axel why he can't leave the hospital room?"

Axel whipped the covers off his thighs. "This place is fuckin' weird, and I know you're lying to me. That doctor you had in here is a whack-job. Something isn't adding up."

"Stay put," Vee commanded.

Zed rubbed the sleep from her eyes and prepared to take both sides with a long breath. "Axel, your brother is right. You can't leave yet. Just stay a little longer and heal."

"Where the fuck am I, Vee? This isn't like any hospital I've ever been to. And why can't I use the phone to call mom and dad?"

Axel's question erased all the sleep Vee had gotten the night before. His fatigue was contagious. Zed approached the bed and brushed Axel's shoulder. The touch diffused the tension in his upper body and opened him up to a new explanation, one that hadn't come from his kid brother's mouth.

"There are no phones here, Axel. You're right... This place is different. We're missing a lot of things you’d consider normal."

"Look, darlin', I know you're just trying to make me feel better, but none of what you're saying makes any sense. What do you mean there's no phone? There's electricity, isn't there? So why can't I hobble my way to a pay phone or borrow someone's cell?"

Vee and Zed exchanged pained looks. The younger brother kneaded his brow and offered Axel the same explanation he had before, reworded. Axel refused to believe a word and scrambled off the gurney, throwing Vee's hands off him as he limped a few steps and realized his mistake.

"What the fuck is wrong with my foot? Did someone sliced my ankle in half? What is happening to me? I feel like I'm on an acid trip that never ends. I go to sleep and see crazy shit, only to wake up in an even crazier place where there're no phones and no fucking food! You're talking in goddamn riddles, Vee. The least you can do is get me a Baconator for my trouble! I can't walk—I can't even jerk off 'cause my good hand is fucked. You gotta help me out."

"How many times do I have to tell you, Axe? There are no restaurants!"

"Bullshit! Sweetheart, come on, you can help me, right? Can you please just grab me something greasy? I'll pay you back, I promise. I'm good for it."

"I wish I could help you, Axel, but Vee's right. There's nowhere to get stuff like that anymore."

"Anymore? What does that even mean? You guys are talking like I slept through the apocalypse or something!"

Zed turned to Vee, who blocked the way to the courtyard. "Come on, Axe. Just settle down, and get back into bed."

"Are you gonna find me some painkillers then?" Axel faltered toward the bed and hoisted himself onto the flat mattress with his right arm.

"I'll see what I can do, buddy, but will you promise to stay here for a little longer?"

"Whatever," Axel scoffed. "What else am I gonna do?"

Zed waited until Axel slid back under the covers and tilted his face away from them both to assess Vee's mood. She suspected Axel's recovery would be difficult. Still, when she pictured him with his eyes open again, she heard laughter and saw game nights, shared wine and inside jokes knitting them closer together—not disarray and a friend who'd forgotten her. And if Vee had left the day he championed himself, Axel wouldn't have any flagship of his past. The scientist's presence tranquillized her despite Axel's rotten mood fouling the atmosphere.

"You're hungry, Axel?" Zed asked.

"Starving."

"I'll try to track down something tasty to eat. It won't be a greasy burger, but maybe I can find you something close to fries. I'll make it myself if I have to."

Axel flipped his eyes to the girl standing with her arms knotted behind her back and smiled. "Oh, darlin'...You're a sweet thing. I'd hate to ask, so I'll just accept the offer. Or maybe Vee can go, and you and I can chat a little more?"

Zed chuckled at the man's slyness. "I have some other things to do. We’ll talk when I get back."

"Don't rush for me, honey, but if you do, I'll take it as a good sign," Axel said with a wink.

At the cost of one of her knit blankets, Zed found someone in Athena to chop and bake a sweet potato in peanut oil. She bartered for garlic and salt to sprinkle on the dish. The redheaded child spotted her making transactions and stopped her at the mouth of the Hives with a cloth of fermented cashew cheese and a large chunk of bread that sat out overnight but was still soft. She offered the foodstuffs to Axel on a thin wood slab, and he accepted with an obsequious grin. He relinquished his dissatisfaction and warmed next to Zed.

"Aw, darlin', look at you go. How can I thank you for your trouble?" Axel asked as he chomped a crispy strand of sweet potato.

Zed stepped back from his bed, blushing. "It's okay, Axel. You don't have to do anything but get better."

"Will you stay with me for a while? If I have to stay in bed, it'd really make my life easier if I have someone to talk to. That is if you don't mind my chattiness."

"Sure. Let me grab a chair from the apartment," said Zed.

Axel finished his meal quickly, and as if he hadn't eaten at all, felt the pang of hunger moments after the last bite of bread. His appetite woke up ravenous, and no amount of homegrown food could satiate the growl.

"I might need to eat again in an hour," Axel informed as Zed dragged the chair across the floor. “I’m a big boy, you know.”

"That's fine. I'll find you something in a little while ."

The injured man nodded and sighed, eyelashes fluttering over tired green eyes. A bloated silence proceeded, and Zed wondered how to initiate a conversation. Vee told her not to confuse Axel with present-day news, but all she wanted to do was ask about Richard Glott's underground bunker and with who he'd crossed paths that left him slashed and maimed.

After a couple of deep breaths, Axel murmured, "I see you in my dreams every time I fall asleep. Is that strange?"

Zed hid her shy smile behind her palm. "Oh, stop."

Axel shimmied his torso higher on the bed and frowned in pain. "No, seriously. Not trying to be slick, honey. I see the most fucked up things when I sleep. You know the kind of dreams so vivid, you wake up and your heart’s pounding, thinking it's all real for a minute? Then you're like... No way."

Zed shifted closer to Axel's bed. "What do you dream about?"

Axel smiled to himself. "You, mostly... Us. You and me doing crazy shit together. Sometimes I'm in the desert, and I see this airplane in the distance. It's on the ground, and I ride toward it, you know, you're not gonna ignore a crashed plane, right? Then I find you there, but these guys are hurting you, and you're going nuts trying to shake 'em, but there's too many, so I shoot 'em all, and they melt like popsicles. You stab one good, though."

"What else?" Zed asked.

"I dunno... Sometimes it's just me and you cruising through the desert, and I get the feeling you hate me, but I kinda like it. I'm happy you're there, even though we're in the middle of nowhere, and I have no idea what's gonna happen next."

"Sounds like some pretty weird dreams."

"They're so lucid. It's like a movie, and I'm the main character, and you're... Well, you. Like my cool sidekick."

"Sidekick, huh?" Zed scoffed.

"Yeah, you have this air about you that's like not to be fucked with. Then things always get real dark. I don't even want to tell you about it 'cause you'll think I'm fucked in the head."

Zed knew this part of the story and lowered her eyes to the floor. "It's okay. You can tell me if you want. It's just dreams, right?"

"Nah, I'll just leave it at that. It's not sex stuff or anything if you're wondering."

"Your dreams are more entertaining than anything I have going on today."

With Zed's green light, Axel inhaled deeply before launching into the story of their past. Before he uttered another syllable, a severed connection sparked in his head. His eyes grew large, and he looked around the makeshift hospital room, awestruck.

"In my dreams, we're trying to get to Vee. He needs us for some reason."

"What does he need?"

"Some science shit, which makes total sense because he's a scientist. He's actually a scientist, and not just in my dreams."

"Axel... These dreams you've had... Do you think they have significance?" Zed asked carefully.

"Totally. They have to. Right? Or am I fucking crazy?"

"You're not crazy, Axel. I promise."

"But what if I am? This place... I get such a bad feeling when I'm awake in this room by myself. Vee won't tell me where we are. It's like he's hiding something, and he never lies to me about anything. We don't do that."

"Vee just wants you to get better. He's under a lot of stress, and your recovery is a big part of that. We didn't think—he didn't think you'd make it through. Another complication is the last thing you guys need."

Axel went quiet again and fixated on the dust motes and bolts of lightning crackling up his leg. A storm grew behind his eyes, the same torrents Zed saw when she tried to stop him from leaving Kinderfeld and her behind. Sickened by the thought of Axel sneaking off, she touched his arm and offered a warm smile.

"Talk to me, Axel. Please. Don't keep anything inside."

Axel glanced at her small hand on his tattooed bicep and the lightning in his body faded.

"We were friends in a past life," Axel claimed.

"We're friends in this life."

"Can I tell you one other thing, then I promise I'll stop talking about my bonkers dreams?"

"Yes. I don't mind at all."

Axel curled his bicep and touched Zed's fingers, feeling the motion out until she grasped his hand.

"I think I have to take you somewhere."

"Oh, yeah?" Zed giggled. "And where's that?"

Axel blushed for the first time and brought her hand to hold next to him on the bed. "Not like on a date or anything. I just get this feeling that I'm supposed to protect you, even though you seem capable of looking after yourself just fine. This dream voice keeps reminding me to stay with you and Vee... Like I'm not allowed to let either of you out of my sight. Especially not you."

"Then don't," Zed said.

He squeezed her fingers gently. "I won't."

~*~

Word of Axel's consciousness seeped out of the lab and into the village. Nobody knew who had made the discovery—Vee blamed Samson while Zed suspected Nalani, who'd waltzed by the lab doors at a suspiciously slow pace several times each day—and leaked the information. They barred visitors and only allowed the doctor in to help change Axel's bandages until Ivar arrived.

Axel was alone, humming a tune from his teenage years when the king came through the doors and stopped to stare at his bed-ridden friend.

"Zee, you're awake? And no one thought to tell me?"

"Sorry, hombre, but I think you have the wrong room. Name's Axel."

Ivar flashed all his sharp teeth in a sly smile and wagged his finger. "Always a joker."

"No, really," Axel chuckled, then went deadpan. "Wait... Who are you?"

Before Ivar spoke, Vee walked into the lab and froze when he saw Ivar standing a few feet from Axel's bed.

"Ivar. I wasn't expecting you."

The king sneered and motioned toward Axel. "What's with this guy?"

"Hey, maybe we can talk for a second?" Vee invited Ivar down the hall, out of earshot.

Ivar glared at the scientist. "When exactly were you planning on telling me he woke up?"

"That's the thing, Ivar. You don't understand... Axel's suffering from amnesia. It's common for coma patients to lose parts of their memory. Right now, he's in a very touchy state. He has no idea where he is, who you are, or what any of this is. I've tried to keep people away from him to avoid confusion, but now everybody knows. It's not good for him. Subjecting him to all this new information can cause anxiety, panic... Who knows. We're trying to ease him back into life."

"What do you mean he doesn't know who I am? I'm his best friend."

"Trust me. Axel doesn't even remember serving in the army."

"That's crazy. We should tell him—"

"No. It's too big of a shock. Axel's already gone through hell. Imagine trying to explain our world to somebody who has virtually no idea what's happened in the last couple of years."

Ivar pondered and didn't respond to Vee's relief, then sighed as though he accepted the explanation.

"So what does this mean for you? I assume you're retracting your claim and staying in Kinderfeld?"

Vee twisted his mouth to the side. "How can I go now?"

"You volunteered."

"That was before Axel came home. He needs me. I'm the only person he recognizes. Give me some more time with him, get him back on his feet and see if he'll start remembering, then I'll go."

Ivar crossed his arms across his burly chest. "Who knows how long that might take?"

"Would you leave someone you loved in that state?"

"I'd do what's for the greater good."

"He's your best friend. He's my brother. Axel needs us right now, Ivar. Think of all he's done for us. We owe it to take care of him until he's fit to at least walk again. I need him to remember what happened so I can get a better idea of what's going on outside."

"I suppose you're right," Ivar conceded. "You can't go out blind by yourself."

"Yes, you're right," Vee said with great relief.

"So what now? I can't talk to him?"

"You can speak to him if you like, but try not to bring up things that might confuse him. Don't talk about the army or mention recent times."

Ivar looked over his shoulder at the apartment's open door and heard the muted humming of a girl filtering through the corridor.

"And how's Lea taking all of this?"

Vee stiffened. "She's helping out."

"Axel has no idea who she is? He really doesn't know what's happened?"

"Not that I can tell. He keeps asking for cheeseburgers and to call our parents."

"Wow," Ivar whispered.

"Yeah, it's hard."

Ivar went quiet, distant, and shook his head slowly before inhaling through his nose and squeezing Vee's shoulder. "I trust you, brother. Maybe we'll talk more about your expedition in a few days when things have a chance to settle with Axel."

"You got it."

Axel pretended he wasn't trying to listen to the conversation between his brother and the brown-haired man with the striking blue eyes when the pair returned. Ivar nodded at Axel, his eyes awash with sympathy for the indisposed man.

"How are you feeling, Axel?"

"A little on the shitty side, my man. Not gonna lie. Hands busted, foot's bum... Can't fuck my way to a decent meal in this place, and everyone's tiptoeing around like I'm a sleeping baby. Gotta say I've had better days."

"Well, I hope you heal up quick. There are a lot of people who want to see you."

A coy smirk unfurled over Axel's face. "Yeah, I kinda get that impression. Sometimes, I see people looking in through those doors. I feel like a panda at a zoo. Everyone wants a peek at little ol’ Axel, huh?"

"Is there anything I can get you?"

"Cheeseburger?" Axel asked hopefully.

"Would if I could, friend."

"Goddamn it," Axel lamented.

Vee widened his eyes when Ivar looked at him, confirming what they'd discussed in the hallway.

"Say, how do you stay so beefy if there's no meat in this place?" Axel asked Ivar.

"I get my protein where I can. Try to stay fit. I'll get someone to bring you something good to eat."

Axel snorted. "Yeah, that's what that sweet-lookin' one said, but everything tastes like tree bark. No offence to her. She tried her best, and I'd never insult a lady's cooking to her face."

Ivar sucked in his bottom lip and nodded. "Well, I'll see what I can do for you, Axel. Get better soon."

Vee held his breath until Ivar left the lab and shrunk once the doors closed.

"You sure have a way with words, don't you?"

"Everyone who walks in here acts like they know me."

"We might have to move you to the apartment. Put a cap on your visitors."

"Who was that?" Axel asked.

"That's Ivar Lothbrok. He kinda runs things, in a sense."

"Nice guy."

Vee scoffed. "Yeah. Nice."

An itch stuck in the back of Axel's head, and he grew quiet once again, trying to unravel the mystery he'd woken up inside. He was a figure in a snow globe, a permanent fixture in a landscape rife with faces he'd seen in dreams. Sitting up in his bed, Axel wondered what laid beyond the confines of his glasshouse. Never one to follow the rules, even under the firm guidance of his smart younger brother, Axel decided once everyone fell asleep, he'd find himself a walking post and go exploring.

~*~

Zed woke to the sound of Vee's soft snoring coming through the open door of his bedroom. The possibility of sleep retracted with every second she spent staring at the smooth, globular ceiling in the dark, trying to make shapes out of the dream residue behind her eyelids. The sofa stiffened her back, and she twisted her spine until air bubbles popped and her muscles strained from the motion. She pulled the blanket up to her chin and squeezed her eyes shut for a few minutes, but Axel's stories followed her from sleep, brushing up on her with sharp quills. Since Axel painted his dream world, she hadn't stopped thinking of him and mourning the loss of his memory for the both of them. Axel didn't know his missing pieces were dancing under his eyes each time he slumbered, and she longed to stitch them together to create the full picture.

She squinted into the darkness, fatigue long since faded, and left the apartment. Light on her bare feet, Zed padded down the hallway and turned the corner to find an empty bed. Her heart twinged from Axel's absence. She considered going back to the apartment to tell Vee his brother was missing but found herself propelled to seek Axel out herself. There was nowhere in the lab a man of Axel's stature could hide, so she went out to the courtyard to begin her search. The floodlights cast pyramids of light over the foothills but revealed nothing but stone paths and glittering grass ranks. She started left first, then changed her mind and shot right toward the warehouse. Zed minded her steps as she picked up a jog, extending her legs to clear the roiling yards until she reached the square entrance of the warehouse. A guard leaned against the steel wall next to the exit, blinking and wiping a hand over his face to rouse himself. He saw Zed across the cement expanse and stood up straight.

"What're you doing out here?" The guard's voice clattered through the chamber.

"Sorry," Zed said, casting a thorough glance around before retreating into the light and shadow of the courtyard again. She rushed to the Hives, taking quick strides to reach her abandoned apartment before anyone else noticed her. After a quick knock, Zed opened the door to find her former living quarters as deserted as ever. Nobody had claimed the space in her absence, nor was Axel's adjoining apartment occupied. Both rooms were empty.

Zed's search for Axel continued and grew in urgency with each lonely cove and space she found. As she made her way around the central dome where the courtyard bordered the largest hill, she stopped at the mouth of the Chrysalis and addressed the men standing guard.

"Have either of you seen someone limping through here?"

"Nobody's come 'round here, Zed. Who're you looking for?"

Zed cocked her head. "Who do you think?"

"You mean Zee?" The man on the right asked. "Thought he was paralyzed."

"So it's true? He's awake?"

"Please don't tell anyone. Not yet."

The bearded guard rose a dark eyebrow at Zed. He was one of Ivar's highest-ranking patrol. Zed recognized him from the night they'd brought in the Zeronaut captain, Monk. He often stood by wherever Ivar went and didn't talk much unless addressed. "Ivar know about this?"

"I don't know what Ivar knows. Vee communicates with him, but we're trying to keep this from the general public."

"What do you think, Fen? Should we tell Ivar?" The scrawny, clean-shaven guard asked.

Fen sneered and told his partner to close his mouth before angling his torso toward Zed. "We'll keep an eye out, petite fleur."

Zed nodded and continued on her way, but there were few more spots Axel could hide unless someone had intercepted him and invited him into their hovel. She thought of Nalani, who often wandered the courtyard at odd hours and Trinity, who adored Axel and might jump at the opportunity to lead him to a private alcove. The two of them shared living space in Athena. Zed wanted to keep the search party light, and asking around would only spread curiosity like wildfire.

She continued touring the courtyard, her naked soles sore from hurried walking. Finally, she stopped at the greenhouse gate, its series of coiling iron bars and metal flowers welded to the columns in intricate clusters. Zed lifted the latch and pushed the gate open, taking care to shut it quietly. The greenhouse where the citizens grew aloe and berries was the little-known getaway spot Axel and Vee coveted as their private paradise. Zed zigzagged through the raised beds, taking care not to trip over the irrigation hoses and climbed the wooden steps at the back of the third square house. Around another corner and through the thick blackberry bushes nestled in rectangles of sodden earth, Zed rushed to the spot under the sky where the light poured in but found nothing.

"Shit," she whispered, out of breath and reeling in the thick, tepid air.

Zed looked up to the cloudless velveteen sky, crushing disappointment wringing her heart. In a throng of shadow off to the right, a figure shifted and startled the woman backward.

A tired voice called her name.

The shady form lengthened, struggling to stand. Once it stood at its full height, the vice pressing Zed's chest disappeared. Axel hobbled into view, using the overhead pipes to help himself along.

"Axel! There you are. Oh my God, you had me so worried. Why did you leave the lab?"

"The lab? Is that where you've been keeping me?"

Zed clapped her palm over her mouth. Axel gave an elongated nod, eyes wide and accusatory.

"Is that what I am? Some kind of experiment?"

"No, Axel—"

"What are you and Vee doing? Tell me why he's keeping me locked up. Tell me where the fuck I am, Lea. Please. This place... Something about it seems wrong. It scares me."

Axel wilted against a plant bed as Zed approached and caught his elbow to keep him upright.

"Axel, don't be scared. Please, I promise you're safe. We're not trying to keep you captive. This is all difficult to explain, and you were asleep for so long parts of your memory are missing. Vee's only trying to make it easier for you to cope."

"Cope with what, Lea? Cope with the fact I'm a prisoner? That I can't sleep because my nightmares are so vivid, I feel like I'm dying? That people watch me like some sideshow freak?"

"Everything," Zed sighed. "The new world. How can we explain all this to someone who woke up in the past?"

Axel looked up through the skylights and whimpered. "Something terrible has happened, hasn't it?"

Zed, wounded from the dejection in her friend's voice, led Axel to sit on the floor, then sat next to him and draped her arms over his shoulders, resting her cheek on the thin cotton shoulder strap of his tank top.

"I wish I could say you're wrong, but I can't lie to you, Axe."

"My instincts were right. Something is very wrong. After that Ivar fella came through, I started getting this feeling you all weren't telling me something on purpose."

"Don't be angry with us, Axel. We didn't know how to tell you."

Axel leaned his head on Zed's and sought her hand to hold. She slid her fingers through his and gripped tightly. "It's okay. I get it now. I'm supposed to be here. You and me... We're meant to be together. Otherwise... Why would I see you every time I close my eyes?"

"Axel," Zed whispered. "I missed you so much when you left. I thought I'd never see you again. Now everything is different."

"I'm sorry. If I hurt you back then... I didn't mean it."

"Just don't leave me again. Please. I can't fool myself into happiness without you in my life."

"I won't leave. I can't."

"Promise?"

"I promise, Lea."

"Promise-promise?"

Axel chuckled and kissed the top of Zed's head before laying his cheek on the ruts of her braids. "Yeah. I promise-promise."

~*~

Axel and Zed laid on the floorboards and watched the stars twinkling above while the chamber filled with water vapour, obscuring the glass until the condensation evaporated. When the infinite black sky lightened to meteorite violet, Axel used Zed as a crutch to stand up. He stole a fistful of blackberries, stuffing the fruits in his mouth and mashing them until inky juice seeped from the corners of his lips. He complained about his ankle, which he'd suffered walking on during his solo excursion to the greenhouses. Zed berated him for wandering off and helped him down the steps and through the rows of potato plants, arms locked, their pace slow to accommodate Axel's injury.

A murmur greeted the pair as they approached the iron gate. A dozen villagers gathered around the entrance to witness Axel emerge with smiles on their faces. Frozen from the elated faces beaming at him, Axel pulled on Zed's arm, alerting her to the hoard of onlookers.

"Who are they?" Axel asked.

"Zee! Happy you're awake!"

"What happened to your arm, Zee? Are you okay?"

"He looks terrible."

Zed opened the gate, and the crowd dented but didn't part. "Make room, please!"

"We want to talk to Zee!"

Axel then realized the group addressed him, their wide eyes drinking in his bruised and broken state with smiles unfitting his poor condition. An overwhelming sense of worry touched his skin, and he grabbed for Zed to lead him, but they huddled around the gate until a tall head of blond hair sliced the crowd in half. Vee shouldered past, his eyes hooded and brow furrowed.

"Axel! Lea! What the hell are you doing out here? Lea, did you let him out?"

Zed frowned and drew her shoulders up. "Of course not! I'm the one who came looking for him."

"Let's go. Come on, now. Everyone make way. Go back home!" Vee barked.

"We want answers! What's happening outside the walls?"

"We'll answer your questions later," Vee said disdainfully. "Lea, help me get him back."

The trio staggered to the lab, breathless from the trek over the bowing foothills. Vee waited until they were behind closed doors to deliver a speech about how irresponsible and defiant Axel was, how his behaviour might cause unwanted ripples where the scientist required placidity. Axel hoisted himself into bed and accepted his lecture, sullen and quiet, occasionally glancing at Zed, who also wrung her wrists.

"I told you not to leave the room, Axe. Why? Why can't you listen to me for once in your goddamn life?" Vee asked.

"You're not my mommy, Valter. I can do what I want, and frankly, I don't appreciate you keeping secrets from me!"

"What are you on about?"

"Oh, don't play dumb. You've lied to me this whole time! About where we are, what's happened to me. I think you know much more than you lead on."

Vee scoffed and looked to Zed for reassurance. The girl stood still with her shoulders hunched.

"Lea, help me out here."

"Well, Vee... Maybe it's time we tell him everything. There's no use hiding the truth anymore. He already knows something's wrong."

"Yeah!" Axel cried. "I'm done sitting around twiddling my thumbs. You have to tell me what's up. How did I get like this? What the fuck happened to me, and why can't I remember anything? I don't know how I got here or who all those people are out there."

"That's the thing, Axe... We don't know what happened to you. You left, and when you came back, you were unconscious and hurt. We don't leave this place, so I can't tell you anything more than that. I didn't know if you'd wake up and certainly didn't know you'd have amnesia when you did."

Axel turned to Zed for verification, and she nodded her head regretfully.

"It's true, Axel. I wish we could tell you more."

"Then at least tell me where I am. Start there," Axel demanded.

Vee and Zed stood speechless for a moment until she sighed deeply. "Vee, maybe we should give him the postcards and his journals."

"What are you talking about?"

"You're right, Lea. Go get the box. Tonight's gonna be a long one."

Zed hauled the box of postcards and dog-eared journals into the lab and hefted it onto the foot of Axel's bed. Vee unpinned the postcards from the corkboard and offered them to Axel with a pinched smile. Zed sat in her chair while Vee laid on the floor, a long arm slung over his eyes as Axel began to read aloud from his workbooks. The three of them listened to the stories Axel had penned years before while he was in the infantry as if none of them had heard the tales. From time to time, Axel stopped narrating and glided over the lines, taking in details he should have known, but couldn't place. During these silences, Zed and Vee would look up at him to assess his emotions, whether or not the words shifted the pieces into place or made any difference at all.

Axel took in a strained breath. "Ivar and I aren't talking. He wants to be the leader on this ship, and if things don't go his way, he turns into a giant douche-nozzle," he broke into giggling at his insult. "I haven't eaten in three days, and the water supply is low. We're down to a cup a day each. It's not enough, but it's gotten us through so far. One of the guys got sick, and they've taken him below deck. He throws up constantly even though there's nothing in his gut and howls all night in agony. I swear to God I'll shoot him in the head tomorrow if he doesn't let us sleep tonight. Someone needs to put him out of his misery."

Zed grimaced, and Vee stared at the ceiling with dry eyes, unflinching from the story.

"Day six... I now know what rat meat tastes like."

"Oh, god. Ew," Zed mumbled.

Axel continued without pause. "It's not that bad when you haven't eaten in almost a week. I've set up more traps in the galley to catch the rest. If Ivar plays his cards right, I might share my rats with him, but he's still a stuck-up twat.

I'm not sure how the rats are surviving. Maybe there's food still hidden somewhere on the ship. Maybe they're eating each other."

"This must have been when you were on your way back to America...Or... Whatever you want to call this half of the world now," Vee said.

"What do you mean?" Asked Axel.

"The Unity... The government... They abolished the borders, erased the country names and burned the history books. The states became part of the North-Western Hemisphere. Same with Canada and all that. No countries. No names."

Axel seemed to accept his brother's explanation that nothing would ever be as before. The commune in which he now resided was the only tangible place left in existence. Outside the walls lay sites changed from war, stripped of home and heritage. A tightness in Axel's neck prevented him from speaking until the revelations grew too heavy for him to bear.

"What happened to everyone else?" Axel asked.

"It's hard to say," Vee whispered, then cleared his throat. "A lot of people died."

"How many?"

"Billions," Zed said.

"You mean... We're the only ones left?"

"No, we're not. There are other survivors out there, people who were meant to live through the storms."

"Storms?"

Vee sighed, the farfetched nature of their fates exhausting him before he began. "The Unity developed a way to return the planet back to its natural state. No more electronic communication, no more broadcasts or satellites or TV. After the extinctions reached an all-time high, they introduced these plants that could suck the pollution from the air quickly. They grow extremely fast and are lethal to anyone who wasn't vaccinated against the spores. One plant can release a spore cloud big enough to cover half a football field, and they breed and multiply like vermin. Even a small cluster can kill a stadium of unimmunized people in a few minutes."

"But why would they do this? Have I been vaccinated?"

Axel's questions ripped holes in Vee’s composure. Zed's stomach churned and flipped as the scientist fished for the least aggressive explanation. A gloss came over his eyes, and he avoided his brother's bewildered stare.

"No, Axe. You're not."

"Oh... Are you?" Axel whispered.

"Yeah, I am. So is Lea."

"Why? Why didn't I get vaccinated?"

"You were lost at sea with your platoon for weeks, and before that, you were overseas. They didn't immunize the troops."

"Are you telling me the government wants us all to die?"

"Most of this is widely debated. There are some theories that the Unity had a strategy in mind."

Zed lent the scientist a hand and cut the heavy topic with a smile. "Axel, you're much more special than you know. Those people out there all adore you because of what you've done for Kinderfeld. You were the only one brave enough to go out when they needed supplies. People know your name not only here but out in the world. I've seen you fight and shoot. You're a natural."

"Well, yeah. I've been shooting guns since I was a kid."

"You were a special ops sniper. More than just a good shot."

Axel warmed to the compliment. "And what about you? Are you the mercenary of my dreams?"

Zed blushed and failed to hide her pride. "Not a mercenary... But I've murked a few Scavs in my day."

"Man... I like you," Axel tittered. "Ain't she great, Vee? What a prize."

For the few seconds of silence that passed, Vee's expression darkened. He recognized the reverence pulling Axel's features, the heartfelt way Lea relaxed when they spoke. Even in the absence of memory, Axel and Zed forged a bond too strong to pry apart. He would never wish ill upon his brother, but he mourned the days past with the woman whose eyes shone like vats of golden syrup passing under the morning light. At the risk of sharing a likeness with Ivar, the king who could never quite capture the woman's love, Vee thought of what life might have been like had Axel never returned. Would Zed love him? Could she? Had he ever toed the waters of her unspoken affection? Vee cursed his stupidity the night he told her how he felt and quickly dismantled his chances before she had the opportunity to consider him more than a close friend.

As Zed stared at Axel upright in his bed with his journals splayed out around him, Vee knew it was too late to rescind his platonic claim. A victim of his own sabotage, the scientist turned from them and pushed out every last ounce of breath to make room for another stale intake.

"I think it's time I showed Axel the Crimson Yawn."

Zed nodded and left the brothers, sensing a gloomy air rising between them. Vee was much better at explaining the inexplicable. He delivered news with a needed bluntness, one Zed had never mastered. Once she left the lab searching for distractions, Vee helped his brother box up the journals and offered his elbow to guide Axel back on his feet. Amid the bleak news, Axel had almost forgotten the pain in his extremities.

They waddled to the locked chambers where the bulk of Vee's scientific discoveries came to light. Axel squinted against the bright white walls and polished floor as he followed his brother through a series of doors leading to a clear dome similar to the greenhouses he'd found, only this hollow contained a twisted swarm of redheaded plants, mouths bloody and agape. Each one stood over seven feet tall and lifted its black-spotted maw to the sky in a silent scream. Axel turned from them.

"I've seen these before, but never this many. In my dreams, there's always one growing in a container."

"You recognize them?"

"And you say these things can kill me? How is it possible?" Axel asked.

"They're a sophisticated hybrid plant. They release spores like mushrooms, and those spores become airborne. If you breathe them in, they attack your blood, soaking up the nutrients and essentially turning it into a highly acidic jelly. You burn from the inside out. Well...Dissolve is a better word."

"And you've brought me here why!?" Axel shouted, dodging backward and planting too much weight on his bad ankle.

"Don't worry! They can't hurt you from in here. The filtration system's design protects everything inside."

"I still have a hard time believing all this. You know how crazy it sounds, right?"

Vee clapped his brother on the shoulder. "Oh, I realize. Why do you think it took me so long to break the news? You try finding a delicate way to explain this to someone who just came out of a coma."

Axel became transfixed on the plants again after Vee's assurance. He shuffled to the glass and studied the roaring heads, each one slightly different than its neighbour. They resembled demons, bizarre red monsters with thick necks and broad leaves of wax. Their spiked roots toiled in the ground, gnarled and tangled in a hellish orgy above and beneath the soil. Beyond the ranks, Axel saw the roiling jungle and all its hues of green and black. The sun broke through parts in the towering trees. How he longed to feel the wind on his burnt skin and walk among the flora. Axel observed the plants for a few minutes as Vee stepped back and allowed him time to digest.

"Am I in a nightmare?" Axel met his brother's eyes and did not blink.

"Some might say that. And I'm sorry. I've dedicated my life to making things better for the survivors, but there's nothing left I can do. All we have now is the village and each other."

"And mom and dad?"

"They're gone, Axe. They've been gone a while."

The tattooed man swallowed bitterly and nodded as a wall of tears blinded him. Vee touched his brother's shoulder and shared his pain through the comforting gesture. Axel crossed his chest with his good hand and patted Vee's fingers.

"Do you mind if I spend some time alone? This is... It's just a lot."

"Of course. Take all the time you need, Axe. I'll leave the doors unlocked. You good to walk?"

Axel's voice floated below a whisper. "I’ll manage."

~*~

In the apartment, Zed held her arms out before her and swung them in half-circles, stretching her muscles in preparation for another stiff night spent on the sofa. Vee came in after dinner and found Zed flinging her limbs outward.

"Nightly aerobics?" He asked with a touch of humour, the most he could muster after a day of harsh truths.

"Just stretching out before bed. My back's been killing me."

"Oh," Vee's green eyes popped open wide. "Don't sleep on the couch, Lea. You can take the bed tonight."

"Nah, it's okay."

"No, really. I insist. You deserve a night without hanging off the edge of the cushions."

"Then where will you sleep?" She asked.

"The couch."

Zed laughed at the idea. "You're far too tall to fit comfortably."

"I've passed out there dozens of times. Don't worry about me, really. Take the bed."

"Why're you being so nice, huh?" Zed snorted.

"I've seen you in pain the last few days, and I feel bad. It's rude of me to have one of the biggest beds in this place when I don't do anything to deserve it."

"Oh, shush," Zed jested. "You've done more for this place than anyone."

"There's always the Chrysalis."

The good humour in the room vanished with Vee's maladroit suggestion. Zed shook her head and scoffed. "I'm not going to the Chrysalis. I want to stay here with you guys."

"Fine by me. You'll take the bed tonight then. Grab your blankets and go."

Zed and Vee swapped bedding and wished each other goodnight. Though she deemed herself undeserving of the luxury, when Zed crawled onto Vee's large bed and spread her limbs from corner to corner, her skin bristled with goosebumps. The scent of the sheets belonged to the man outside the room, sprawled on the sofa, long legs dangling over the arm—cotton and boyish musk, the redolence Zed had grown accustomed to except in this moment. Lying on the mattress reminded her of the hugs and closeness she'd received from Vee when Axel had fled.

She relived their days together in clips of happy memories and some not so joyful. Across the apartment, Vee recalled the same night playing in Zed's mind—their evening in the greenhouse when they'd held hands, so close together yet barred by the promises of friendship. Vee cursed himself repeatedly while Zed entertained the idea of getting together with the scientist.

Soon, Zed's thoughts slid over the night she'd spent with Ivar. If she concentrated, she could feel the fullness between her legs still. Ivar had made love to her the way couples did in films. He'd stroked her and kissed her skin, took her nipples gently between his lips and sucked until she giggled. What might have excited some left her shivering. Was one of the brothers more deserving of her love? Was she foolish to think herself so desirable her attention was a coveted badge of excellence?

What a prize!

Lea... I want you to tell me no, right now.

It's like you were made for me.

With her heart racing, Zed turned over in bed and clamped her eyes shut. Debating which of the three men in her life she wanted more made her stomach flip, yet she couldn't keep the lewd considerations from pouring into her head. In these fantasies, she replaced Ivar with Vee. Yes, he was smart and gentle and keen on her, but he'd told her not to let him cross the line, claimed he didn't want her that way despite his feelings. Vee's kind face took the place of Ivar's, coasting down her stomach, stamping her thighs with kisses from luscious lips. She squeezed her legs together and let the inevitable shift knock Vee from the picture to make room for his older brother.

The tattooed man with all his addictions and his looming depression positioned himself between her knees and grasped her ankles delicately. A murderer and womanizer leaned over her body, caging her with long limbs decorated with sparrows, weapons, chains and barbed wire.

We're meant to be together. I see you in my dreams every time I fall asleep.

Zed bit her lip when the phantom sensation invaded her. She knew not how Axel would moan or if he'd coo and sigh the way Ivar had when they had sex. She wanted very much to think Axel would treat her with respect and scorned the claims Trinity had made about his wild side. Then the obscene journal entries came to life, glowing, fanned by salacious visions. What if she didn't want to make love? What if she wanted to be taken hard and fast by a man who worshiped her? Guilt and arousal mixed in her chest and sat heavy, grinning evilly like a demon poised to possess her body.

Sleep wriggled through Zed's conjurations and pulled her under before she realized she was slipping into blackness. The cozy bed and Vee's sheets lulled her, and soon, she dreamed of ordinary things, forgetting her personal stash of pornographic thoughts. She slipped further as the moon made a lazy arc through the night sky until something touched her shoulder and jarred her from sleep with a sharp gasp.

Her scream ripped through the apartment, sending her waker toppling out of bed.

"Lea? Oh, fuck. Fuck!"

"Axel?"

In the dimness, neither of them saw each other but tasted each other's heavy breath. Soon the light snapped on, and Vee stood at the door, chest heaving.

"What the hell is going on?" Vee asked. "Axel? What're you doing?"

"Christ, I thought Zed was you. I just came to... Well, I couldn't sleep," Axel cringed. "Shit, my hand. Fuck, I landed like a sack of bricks."

Vee snickered, setting off a series of giggles. "You came to sleep in my bed?"

"I didn't mean to scare you, Lea."

"It's all right," said Zed. "Really. On any other night, it would have been Vee in here."

Axel pulled himself up by the elbows and sat on the edge of the bed, grimacing from the agony of his agitated wounds. "Sorry, guys. It's hard to sleep out there. People are watching me."

Zed scooted over and patted the part of the mattress warm from her body. "Come on. Lie down. I think we could all use a sleepover after the day we've had."

"You're not serious," Vee said with a scoff as his brother took up Zed's offer and laid down next to her.

Zed nodded with conviction. "Absolutely. You too, Valter. Turn off the light and get over here."

He rolled his eyes as he flipped the light switch. "This is hardly a three-person bed."

"Well, cuddle up, pal."

"Lea takes up a fraction of the bed, anyway," Axel pointed out.

"Is this not weird to you? Three adults sharing a bed?"

Zed moved to the center as Vee climbed into bed from the left. To her right, Axel had already sprawled and turned over to face her in the dark.

"It's no stranger than how half the people in this place sleep all piled on top of each other. Humans were meant to nest. In the wild, this is how we'd sleep."

"Yeah, but we're not in the wild," said Vee.

"Yes, we are, little brother. Have you seen it outside? We're literally in glass bubbles, in the middle of a rainforest. Now shut up, and go to sleep."

"You shut up."

"Guys?" Zed chimed.

"Yeah?" The brothers answered.

"I love you both.”

Robbed of their voices, Axel and Vee set aside their bickering to bask in the genial haze of Zed's words. Axel shifted an inch closer while Vee laid stiffly on his side, eyes wide in the dark. As though her claim was bathed in wine, they soaked in the meaning and slipped drunkenly into slumber.

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[descendantofthesparrow]

Encore - Harry Hook x reader - part 20 - developments

=

Huh….well that’s….interesting?

“Dove and Thomas broke up huh?” you muttered to yourself, scrolling through your Tumblr as most of the Descendants fandom blew up about the two actors' separation. The two had split up two months ago and had been keeping it secret for their privacy, you snorted, remembering when the rumors of Thomas cheating on Dove with you when you and Harry were spotted walking around (where u live) which had surged up again in a different way when the fans (wrongly) accused Thomas with cheating on Dove with his costar, who was forced to reveal her own relationship to get Dove fans off her back.

You had met dove before, and she was….nice enough, but her “fans” were really something else, a lot of them couldn’t get it through their heads that people were allowed to not like Dove and her characters. You had seen them message death threats to some of your mutuals just because they said “oh I don’t like Dove”

There were definitely some that were more mature and left others alone but more often than not they were fucking insane. So, you did your best to stay out of that crowd.

You heard the usual sound of Harry's heavy steps behind you and held up your phone for him to see. He made a sound of confusion and gently pried the device from your grip and scrolled through the article.

A few moments of silence later loud boisterous laughter rang through your apartment. You turned, giggling as Harry hopped around the apartment in a way you haven't seen since the after-party for Mals Engagement Party.

“celebrate good times come on~” Harry sung to himself,  spinning around midair and grinning at you. You just laughed and shook your head.

“what are you so excited for?” you asked, pressing your lips together to prevent any more bursts of laughter to escape your mouth.

“now those shipped me and the purple imp together got no ground ta stand on~” Harry cackled. You couldn’t hold it anymore, loud peals of laughter escaping you as Harry continued to dance around your living room.

“oh, my gooood!” you giggling, falling to your side and holding onto your stomach. Harry side hopped over the couch and landed in front of you, setting your phone down on the coffee table behind him and grabbing your face. You squeaked and giggled as he pressed multiple little pecks to your face and lips “you-“ you tried to get a breath, once again deterred by your laughter “why-don’t you even feel a bit bad for them?”

Harry pulled back, looking off to the side and pursing his lips “I guess” he shrugged, turning back to you “I mean, they did end an….how long were they together?”

“About four years” you hummed, reaching under his arm and grabbing your phone.

“okay yeah, they did end an almost four-year relationship, I would guess they would both feel iffy about tha’ so tha’s all I feel bad abou’ I  guess? I never saw wha’ they were like together so I have no say on if they were happy but…yeah, I feel bad that they were probably sad about it ending or something but now I don’t gotta deal with all that Mal x me shit” he shivered, scrunching his face a bit.

You snorted and rolled your eyes, pressing a kiss to his nose and wiggling out of his arms “whatever, I gotta go” Harry whined and wrapped his arms around your waist, tugging you back towards him.

“whyyyyyyy” he huffed, pouting up at you and giving you his famous puppy dog eyes. You rolled your eyes and ran your fingers through his hair.

“I have a thing with Evie for….well you know” Harry perked up and quickly released you, his eyes shining with excitement.

“well wha’ are yeh waitin’ for! Go!” you snorted at his quick change of behavior and shook your head, turning and going into your room to grab your key and tablet which held your concept art.

“Okay, I’ll be back soon! don’t burn down the apartment!” you heard Harry groan in “frustration” and a thump on the floor as he dramatically fell back onto the floor.

“damn it! Now I gotta think of something else ta do!” you rolled your eyes at his response and pushed your key into the lock on your closet door, smiling at the usual glow of the portal that bled through the cracks of the door.

You pulled it open and stepped through, tossing one more ‘see ya’ at Harry before closing the door behind you.

Moments later you stepped out into Evie's greenhouse turned workroom. She spun around, grinning at you. “hey (y/n)! let's get started shall we!” she made grabby hands at your tablet and danced in her seat as you passed it to her and leaned against her sewing table.

She pressed the power button and grinned “beautiful, I should hire you to be my second designer (y/n)” you laughed and shook your head.

“nah, I like designing but only as a pass time heh” Evie nodded, zooming in on the details and writing down notes on a pad next to her.

“understandable” she hummed as she stood from her seat and walked over to her fabrics “any particular fabrics?”

“uhhhh” you narrowed your eyes in thought “breathable……flows easily….not heavy?” Evie giggled and shook her head.

“a wonderful visual designer but you know nothing about fabrics, well how bout chiffon for the sleeves and train around the waist leading to the back of the dress?” you nodded and picked up the note pad Evie had been writing on.

“That sounds good, um, what about tule? I know it helps with form and stuff but every time I wore it as a kid it was itchy as all heck and I couldn’t stand it” Evie shook her head, pulling out a thick roll of white shiny fabric.

“no that’ll ruin the form, make it more of a bulb shape than letting it flare out, Mikado would work better, it keeps it’s form on its own and flows pretty well” she held out the roll for you to touch. You smiled as the soft fabric brushed against your fingertips.

“Yeah, I like that, M-mikado?” Evie nodded at your guess of the name “yeah that, let's go with this for the main fabric” Evie nodded again and set the fabric to the side, grabbing the notepad from you and writing down something before handing it back to you.

You glanced down and smirked

Main Fabric - Mikado

sleeves and skirt train - chiffon

jewels on neckline - ?

waist overlay - rhinestone (sew just beneath bust and drape over hips and flow of skirt)

shoes - ?

“okay (y/n), jacket off and arms up” you glanced at Evie and wiggled your brows, laughing as she rolled her eyes and smacked your arm. “you and Harry, minds always in the gutter, now I gotta get measurements okay?” you giggled again and shrugged off your jacket, letting Evie finally get your measurements.

After a few minutes of Evie manually pushing your arms and body around, filled with fits of laughter and your torso twisting halfway around, she was done. She picked up her pencil and grabbed the note pad again and scribbled down her findings.

“Alright that’s that, I’ll start making the form, while you” she handed you a red folder “take that to Harry, and don’t look. if he can't see your dress you don’t see his suit” you snorted and rolled your eyes.

“yes, ma’am. Do you want me to leave my tablet here for a bit?” Evie gave a smile and nodded.

“if possible, yes” you nodded back and shrugged your jacket back on, digging out your key from the pocket.

“Alright then, just text me when I can come pick it up, see ya!”

“bye~” Evie gave you a little wave and turned back to her sewing table, muttering fabric measurements for your dress.

You stepped into the main hall, gave a wave to Dizzy and Celia, stuck the key into the closet door, and stepped through the portal back to your world.

You stepped back out into your room and shut the door behind you, you took your jacket back off and tossed it on your bed, setting the key on your dresser and taking the folder to harry. “hey, Evie said to give you this” Harry perked up from his spot on the couch and grabbed the red folder, a soft smile on his face as he looked over the design Evie had made for his suit.

“looks perfect” he muttered to himself, closing the folder and pulling out his phone to text the aforementioned designer. As he talked with her you busied yourself with making lunch.

While you did so thoughts of the wedding came to mind.

What day was it going to be? Where were you going to get married? Who was going to marry the two of you? Would you get married here or in the Descendants world? Who was going to be in the wedding party? Who was going to give you away?

So many questions with little to no answer.

“hmm” you muttered to yourself “well, Uma’s maid of Honor, no question there, Emma, (bff name), Jazzy, and Lily will also be bridesmaids….Dizzy and Celia as junior bridesmaids? Cj too, but the twins….ring bearers?” you sighed, rubbing your face as your head pounded at the millions of decisions you were going to have to make. “I’ll have aunt Tonks take me down to Harry….ummmm shit, the rest I’ll have to decide with Harry”

“decide what with Harry?” the pirate himself hummed, wrapping his arms around you and tugging you into his chest, laying his chin on your shoulder.

“wedding stuff” you muttered, reaching up and running your fingers through his hair. He hummed again, eyes drifting down to your food.

“well, Harriet’s gonna be meh best maid” you snorted at that “beasty boy, Gil, the pup, and Jay are gonna be the groomsmen, haven’t asked ‘em yet but yeh know. Smee twins are gonna be meh junior groomsmen aaand that’s all I've thought about” Harry snorted, leaning back from you and starting to make his own lunch.

“That sounds good” you sighed, leaning against the counter and picking up your sandwich, taking a bit out of the side.

“soooo……” Harry turned to you and perked a brow up “where? Are….are we getting married in my world or yours” Harry shrugged, turning back to his sandwich.

“I don’ care’ either way, but I….I think it would be more sentimental in the meh world..since well…we fell in love there” you grinned as Harry slowly turned red.

“Aww, you are so dang cute” you teased, setting down your sandwich and walking over to him, pressing a quick kiss to his warm cheek.

He pouted and grumbled, pushing your face away. “hey!” you laughed, smacking his hand down and jumping back at him, your soft laughter turned into cackling as Harry tumbled back and yelped, arms quickly wrapping around your waist and holding you against his side.

“ye are so fuckin’ lucky I love you” He grumbled, setting you down on your feet and pecking your forehead.

“I love you too” you giggled back, reaching up and patting his cheeks twice. He blushed and looked away, grabbing his sandwich and walking to the living room.

“he’s so cute” you hummed to yourself, grabbing your lunch and following him.

-end of part 20-

Holy shit 20 parts?! Thas crazy! So max of 10 chapters left! It will end with the wedding and these last couple will lead up to it!

readers dress 

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[andy-the-8th]

Things Green and Growing

Part 9 of Creatures That Defy Logic

Read on AO3

Sam's last day at the greenhouses for the summer and seeing her sister off back to college.

cw: homophobic language

A/N: I just really like the idea of Sam and Jess being biology bros

Also we meet Sam's dad. He's an asshole.

The rushing fans and cool mist of the greenhouse definitely made the late August heat more bearable - no matter how much you might love your job, there's only so much summer sun you (or your plants) could take without some assistance.

"Am I doing this right?"

Jess looked up at Sam from the other side of a table of junipers, a spiky carpet of green across the long low table, contrasting the spotty gray of the wet concrete greenhouse floor. He'd come by the greenhouse a few times over the summer - even though he didn't work there, he insisted he help with something if he was going to hang out. Sam had eventually agreed to let him take care of some of the more innocuous tasks.

Pruning clippers in hand, Jess had been tasked with cutting back the overgrown shoots from the Japanese star junipers - the small conifers were popular for their hardiness as a ground cover, especially as a more durable and eco-friendly replacement for grass. This meant though that their lower branches would snake over the edges of the black plastic pots they were growing in, running sideways in every direction, getting tangled in each other, burning and drying out foliage.

Sam walked over to inspect his handiwork. Actually not too bad.

"Yeah, they look fine."

"Awesome. Thanks for letting me prune something, feels more important than moving things around from table to table" Jess said cheerfully.

"No problem" Sam had come to genuinely enjoy spending time with Jess, and not just as a confidant. Sure, he never got any less excessively enthusiastic, would still frequently go off on tangents of facts and theories, but she'd gotten used to his pattern of speaking. He'd clearly been scared of being annoying the first time he'd visited, and pretty much stayed quiet the few times he'd met Jackie or Jen. Trying to be a bit more normal around new people.

So in a way, she was glad he was comfortable being himself around her now.

Sam went back to the table of peace lilies: graceful, broad glossy dark green leaves with their delicate white alien blooms on long stalks above the thick cluster of greenery at the base. Like the junipers - like most potted plants packed together for commercial purposes - the lower levels were at risk of suffocation, for both light and air, and had to be clipped off before they turned yellow and started to attract mold.

They kept working in silence for a long while, the only sound in the greenhouse the gentle rush of the fans, the occasional hiss of the misting system, the soft clicks of the pruning clippers punctuating at either end of the space.

"So school starts back up in a week."

Sam caught that that was both a perfectly normal observation and a veiled question about what they'd both been thinking since August started. Cody was supposed to be back soon.

"Do you think he'll come back at night? So no one sees him transform back?"

"I don't know, probably." Of course Sam still missed her boyfriend, but it had also been good to spend the summer focusing on her own interests, her own friends, away from swimming and social drama. But she knew she looked forward to seeing him.

Still, it would be a lie to say she wasn't more than a little apprehensive as well.

Like, he literally wasn't human. A lot had probably changed from spending some time as a full-time merman. And what sort of sea creatures were they anyway? Were merpeople more like whales, pelagic, solitary, mostly sticking to the vast fathoms of the open oceans? Living alone or in two or three individuals? Or were they more like dolphins, staying in the shallows in big social pods? Was it like in the movies, secret underwater cities of merpeople with their own cultures, music, governments?

It wasn't too unrealistic to imagine that any of those might significantly change someone's demeanor or even personality. She still got hung up on the whole telepathy thing as well - if Cody came back able to read minds, that might just be too weird of a thing to deal with on top of starting high school.

Jess didn't seem to see any of those questions as anxieties, of course. Quite the opposite. To be fair, he wasn't the one dating him either.

"Gosh, I wonder what it all was like." His voice that that airy sort of awe he'd had back when Cody was still going through the transformations. They actually hadn't really talked about him much over the summer, which Sam had found a little surprising - Jess seemed equally excited to just talk with her, especially with their shared interests in biology. He'd listened attentively when Sam wanted to talk over her mom's work with environmental regulations, or projects she was taking on with the envi-sci club at school next year, or balancing swimming with her other extracurriculars.

"Guess we'll find out." Sam carefully kept any apprehension out of her voice. She did want to know about it, as much as Cody wanted to tell her - but she also wanted to keep their first year of high school as normal as possible after junior high's supernatural finale.

"Yeah. I think I've gotten all the shoots on the junipers."

"Alright, thanks Jess. I'm finishing up here, then will have to be getting home. Jackie's leaving for college again tonight, and I think my dad will be coming to see her off as well."

Sam bit her lip at that. She didn't like having to talk about her father. It wasn't like having divorced parents was abnormal - she guessed that was the case for Jess as well, since he never talked about his mom - but she still didn't like having to bring up her father in more detail than necessary.

"Oh, OK. D'you want me to stick around and help clean up?"

"Nah it'll be fine. Ms. Brantwood should be coming by soon anyway, before I lock up."

"Alright." Jess walked over to the open greenhouse door, where he'd leaned his bike against the frame. He paused for a moment, wiping his glasses with the hem of his shirt where they'd fogged up from the quick temperature and humidity shift, squinting in the sun.

Sam had turned back to the peace lilies, arranging them with proper spacing on the low table, fishing the spray bottle where it had disappeared in the thick stand of leaves, pots, and dirt.

"Sam?"

"Yeah?" she turned her head over her shoulder to where he was still just outside the door, helmet strapped on, hands on the bike ready to go.

"Can you call me if you hear first when he comes back?"

Sam smiled and exhaled out her nose, relaxed her shoulders. "Of course. You too, OK? You're a lot closer to the water than me."

"Oh definitely." Jess balanced to one side on the bike, ready to kick off. "See'ya!"

"See'ya later Jess."

She heard him head off, wheels crunching over the gravel down to the sidewalk, saw him blurred through the glass walls, disappear as he went around the front of the building.

Grabbing the spray bottle and the clippers, she walked them down to the worn wooden cabinets and coat rack built into the wall next to the greenhouse office, hung her gloves on the hook. She took the broom back over to the peace lily table, made sure she hadn't missed any stray leaves or sprinkles of soil on the wet concrete floor. The bell on the door of the office jingled once as it opened and closed - Ms. Brantwood, the owner, came out then, clipboard in one hand, glasses perched on the end of her nose. Ms. Brantwood always looked like some hybrid of a farmer and a librarian, flannel shirt, sleeves rolled up to her elbows, workboots, her gray hair in a tight bun, glasses held on a colorful beaded strap around her neck.

"Ms. Brathwaite," she said congenially. "Here you go." She handed Sam an envelope.

"Thanks Ms. B." Her paycheck from the summer, headed straight for her college savings once she got home.

"Thanks for all the help this summer! The peace lilies never looked better." She smiled approvingly over at the displays where Sam had spent most of the afternoon. "We'd be happy to have you back again."

"That'd be great! Thank you again for having me" Sam tucked the envelope in her canvass bag, slung it over her shoulder, and started to the door.

"Good luck with high school - it's scary at first but you'll do great."

Sam smiled again and backed out the open door, closing it behind her, the screen making a quick whoosh sound before the door clacked on the wood frame. She shifted her bag on her shoulders and started down the sidewalk for home.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

"If you really have that much of a problem with it, you can just leave."

Lindsey crossed her arms and leaned back on her kitchen counter, staring down her ex-husband, who was at the bottom of the stairs next to the front door, one hand on the newel post, head hanging down in frustration.

"I don't have a problem, I have an opinion. Goddamnit, do you have to make everything into one of your crusades?"

"I don't have crusades, Steve, I have morals. It's none of your business how she looks, Jackie is a grown woman."

"Staying in a house that I pay to keep you in."

"Don't bullshit me like that. You known damn well I supported us. The house was only ever in my name, for fucks sake. Your child support checks aren't anything we rely on."

"Trust me, they wouldn't exist if the court didn't say so."

Steve glared back at her, the silence tense. Lindsey huffed and went back to packing granola bars and sandwiches in the lunchboxes on the table - snacks to send with Jackie for the car ride to the airport.

"You shouldn't have let her go to that school either."

"She got a full scholarship" Lindsey snapped. She was rapidly reaching the end of her rope with this conversation and was just about ready to throw Steve out of her house if he continued like he was. He was the father of her kids, he technically had visitation rights - but she wouldn't have him talk like this in their house. Thank God Jackie was outside, and Sam still at work.

"Yeah, well, maybe if she'd gone to a state university instead of some liberal arts bullshit, she wouldn't be dressing like some fucking dyke now."

That was it - he was through.

"Get out. Now."

She threw every bit of venom she could into the final word, her gaze ice cold, her knuckles white gripping the edge of the kitchen counter.

Steve sneered cruelly at her as he shifted to  go and roughly put his hand on the door knob. "Wonder where she got that from."

He opened the door quickly to find Sam on the doorstep, her face surprised and pale. Steve stopped, also startled for a moment. He didn't know how much she'd heard - he didn't care. She was grown up enough to start knowing about the real world unfiltered, as far as he was concerned.

"Hey, Dad," she offered shakily, awkwardly. He just looked down at her coldly.

"Good luck in school next year." He turned back for one last glare at Lindsey, then pushed past Sam down the front steps, to his car in the driveway, leaving the front door open. He slammed the car door as he got in, backed down past Lindsey's car into the cul-de-sac where Jackie was standing next to Vanessa's old Jeep, and sped off around the corner, tires spinning harsh squeals, out of the neighborhood.

Jackie and Vanessa quickly looked over at Sam, clearly worried. Jackie walked up across the small front yard, making herself smile sarcastically, trying to conjure humor for her sister who still was frozen and scared-looking on the doorstep.

"Another grand finale and exit from the father of the year, ladies and ladies!" she announced dramatically.  Sam smiled a little at that - Jackie's features relaxed in relief. Vanessa stayed by the Jeep, eyes closed and looking down, fingers pressed to her temples, shaking her head in exasperation.

"Hey, Sam." Jackie looked hard at her, serious. "Don't listen to anything he says. He's an asshole. Got it?"

"Yeah Jackie. Got it." Sam went inside and put her bag down on the floor next to the kitchen table, where Lindsey was aggressively zipping up the lunch boxes. She might have chided Jackie for using that kind of language in front of her, in less charged circumstances.

"I just have one more box upstairs, 'kay Mom?"

"Alright, don't keep Vanessa waiting out there too long though. I'm set to go when you are."

Sam bit her lip and looked down at the wood grain in the kitchen table, at the lines in the linoleum floor. "Mom, I'm going to put my stuff upstairs too, I'll be down to see them off."

Sam quickly took the stairs, two at a time. She tossed her bag on her bed, closed the door, and turned down the hall to Jackie's room.

She was standing at her bureau, small cardboard box in hand, quickly putting her many rings, chokers, and bracelets in, her back to the door. She turned her head, hearing Sam step into the door frame.

"What's up?"

"Jackie, I- something Dad said -"

"Hey, what'd I tell you? Ignore him. He doesn't know shit." Jackie huffed and went back to gathering things off the top of the bureau.

"Yeah I know." Sam looked down, nervous. "But what he said about how you looked, like a...a.."

"A dyke?"

".......yeah."

To Sam's surprise Jackie actually laughed a little, put her last few bits of jewelry in the box, shoved it into her black backpack, covered in pins and patches. She crossed the room and put her hands on her sister's shoulders. She breathed in, and Sam looked up at her a little.

"Listen to me again now. We are strong, modern women. We can look how we want. We can be how we want. It's a new millennium, we can't stay stuck in that patriarchal bullshit forever."

Jackie definitely looked how she wanted - hair spiked up today, black nailpolish, Bikini Kill shirt with cut off sleeves over her black jeans.

"So, does that mean...?"

Jackie smiled and rolled her eyes. "Actually, no. I'm straight, I'm just goth and like to piss off old men." She paused, serious again. "But there'd be nothing wrong with that if I were, Sam. If anyone were."

"Um, oh. Yeah, OK, I jus-"

Jackie's eyes flicked up, past Sam's face and cutting her off, looking past her face to the doorway. Lindsey was standing there, arms folded, lips pursed, her eyes nervous.

She and Jackie held eye contact for a noticeable moment - Sam turned her head to look at her mom as well. Lindsey's eyes calmed and softened almost too quickly to notice.

"You guys about ready to head out?"

"Yeah Mom, we're done." Jackie walked back over and hauled her backpack up onto one shoulder, the buttons rattling into each other with the motion. Sam turned back and walked past her mom, leading the way down the stairs and out the front door. She paused on the doorstep to let them pass. Jackie hoisted her backpack straighter and stopped in front of Sam on the doorstep.

"You know you can always call me if you want. High school can suck sometimes, if you want to talk to someone who already did it you know where to find me."

"Hey, I was in high school once too" Lindsey added, smiling a bit, trying to lighten the mood as well. Jackie rolled her eyes dramatically.

"'kay, how about if you want to talk to someone who did high school within the last hundred years, THEN call me."

Jackie hugged Sam tight, and walked across the grass to where Vanessa was waiting by the car. Vanessa and Jackie both went to college in Philadelphia - Vanessa at Temple University, Jackie at Haverford College. They were on the same flight over - Vanessa's mom was an airline pilot, so would drive the Jeep back home from the airport after they'd left.

Lindsey followed her down to the side of the car, stopping on the curb, arms crossed over her chest. The air had cooled significantly as the sun went down, almost chilly in contrast to the day's heat.

"Call me when you get in, OK?"

"Yeah of course, same as always." Lindsey hugged Jackie and Vanessa, stepped back from the Jeep as they pulled away with the windows down. Jackie turned up the radio, the energetic chugging guitar and drums filling the summer night, bouncing off the houses around the cul-de-sac.

"WOOOOOOOO!!" as Vanessa steered them away from the sidewalk, Jackie looked back with a wild excited smile, hands up in the rock gesture.

"DRIVE SAFE GIRLS" Lindsey called over the loud music, waving as they turned the corner and out of the development, the music fading as they left.

Lindsey stayed looking down the road for a few moments after the Jeep was gone - from where she was leaning against the front door, Sam saw her mom's eyes were a bit wet. Lindsey walked back up the yard and into the house, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand.

"Sorry, sorry, just you girls are growing up so fast." She smiled then as they both walked back inside. As she closed the door behind them, she un-did and re-did her bun, pushing back the loose red strands from the day, refreshing, restoring order.

Following their routine pattern, Sam walked to the kitchen, got two glasses of water, handed one to her mom as they both settled at the table.

Lindsey took the glass, gently clinked it against Sam's. "Hydrate or die!" she said cheerfully, familiarly as part of their home-from-work/inside joke ritual they'd organically developed over the summer, with Sam getting back from the greenhouses the same time Lindsey got back from the offices.

"Hydrate or die." Sam replied, smiling. They both sipped their water silently, decompressing from the day, from Steve, from Jackie's departure.

"You got everything you need for next week?"

"Yeah, I'm set on everything. I got paid from Brantwood today too."

"Oh good, I'm going by the bank tomorrow morning, I can deposit it for you."

"Thanks Mom."

Eventually Lindsey got leftovers from the fridge to heat up - dinner passed at a welcomely-uneventful rate, just chatting about work from the day, errands to run. They finished the dishes and Sam filled up one of the watering cans on the counter to bring upstairs to her plants. She'd put the succulents on a nightly watering schedule, better to accommodate the extra heat this time of year without extra evaporation.

"Goodnight Mom."

Lindsey looked up from the reports she had absentmindedly been paging through after finishing the dishes - environmental justice never sleeps. "Night hon. You OK?" Her voice was gentle, but firm enough that she indicated that she was leaving it open if Sam wanted to talk about any of the commotion from earlier.

Maybe not tonight.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Goodnight." Sam was up the stairs and out of sight.

Lindsey closed the folder on the table, shuffled it back into the small pile she'd pulled from her briefcase. She leaned forward, hands on her forehead, taking long, soothing breaths with her eyes closed. She stayed like that a while, listening to Sam moving about above - back and forth around her room with the watering can, down the hall to the bathroom and back, waiting til she heard her door click shut for the night. She got up, quietly pushed her chair back under the table. She filled her glass at the sink, downing it in one draft, slowly and smoothly, letting the coolness spread through her whole body.  Hydrate or die.

Filing folders back into her briefcase could wait til morning. It had been a long day.

END NOTES:

I imagined the song Jackie and Vanessa are listening to is Rebel Girl by Bikini Kill

Tune in next time for more of "which of Sam's supporting cast is going to be a lesbian"

Jackie and Lindsey continue to be fun and interesting to write - maybe future spinoffs? Does it still count as fanfiction when the original characters get spinoffs?

[emoboijk]

knj | till death

In the demon world, arranged marriages are business transactions. But this isn’t that simple. —demon au, arranged marriage au, non-idol au

01 :: 02 :: 03 :: 04 :: 05 :: 06 :: 07

2,635 words

gif credit

Inside Namjoon's head, there is nothing but rage. He feels like an animal throwing itself against the bars of its cage, trying to shake something, anything loose. He directs every ounce of power he has at regaining control of himself and he feels only a smidge of progress.

That, and Taemin's teeth nibbling at his earlobe.

Namjoon's eyes stay straight ahead and his body remains immobile. He's glad his body hasn't turned because it means he can keep his eyes on you. He's trying to catalog your and Yoongi's injuries but he finds there are too many to count. He focuses on the men standing behind you both, memorizing their faces. He makes plans to return the favor ten-fold. He wants to clench his fist or jut out his jaw, some small act of defiance, but his body won't move.

"Namjoon here," Taemin purrs, his breath fanning hotly against Namjoon's neck, "made a blood oath with me." Taemin's body curls around the side of Namjoon's possessively, his nails digging into Namjoon's bicep and his teeth running along the pulse point in his neck.

Namjoon tries to ignore it. He can't really feel it anyway. Whatever control Taemin has over his body has also numbed him.

"Idiot," Yoongi grumbles, glaring defiantly at the dark-haired villain clinging to Namjoon. One of the men standing nearby immediately steps forward and hits him in the back of the head. Yoongi sways forward, finds his balance in the chair, and leans back. Turning to the side, he spits blood on the greenhouse floor and licks his teeth. His eyes still have that defiant edge.

"He's not wrong, my love," Taemin giggles, "Giving your blood to an 'enemy'?" Taemin's shoulders shake with laughter before he moves to stand in front of Namjoon. He cups his cheeks in his hands softly and says, "It was just a ploy, hmm? You wanted to come back to me. I know. I figured it out." Taemin's eyes sparkle gorgeously and it sends Namjoon spinning back to when this all began.

The greenhouse was almost new back then. Almost new and hardly used. Ever since their first kiss—baking in the sun, poolside in jean shorts, cherry popsicles melting over lush lips—they'd been sneaking out here to be together.

Taemin always rushes in headfirst, twirling amongst the flora like a Disney character and practically glowing. He has his arms spread wide, whispering that he loves him and he feels safe and he's happy, looking back at Namjoon who lingers at the entrance.

The memory hits Namjoon so suddenly it steals his breath. He comes tumbling back to reality at the sound of your voice.

"How are you controlling him?" you spit, your voice is powerful and vicious. Like a knife, it cuts through his sentimentality. Your face is serious and pensive and angry. He's screaming and clawing and trying to move.

His pinky twitches.

"I'm not telling," Taemin sings, swinging back around to face them, winking at you, "Let's just say it took quite a bit of research." His voice goes up at the end of the sentence because it's all just a game.

"And what do you hope to accomplish?" Yoongi growls from beside you. He's bathed in shadows and the moonlight that does hit him casts him as haggard and bloody. "Blood magic won't make him love you again."

Taemin hisses at him, his eyes losing their playful sparkle and turning deadly serious in a matter of moments. A guard hits Yoongi in the back of the head again and he clatters to the floor, the side of his head smacking the cement with a crack that stops your heart.

"Yoongi!" you scream, wrenching yourself forward in your chair to no avail. Your bindings won't give, and a guard clutches your shoulder to bruising and slams you back into your seat.

"Anyway, I guess we should be on to the main event," Taemin says, his voice sugary again. He faces Namjoon once more, his expression so similar to the one he used to wear.

They're in the fields behind the main house and the grass is so tall it hides them, laying on their backs with their fingers intertwined. The sun bakes their skin golden brown and turns Taemin's hair auburn. Namjoon rolls to hover over him, both of them out of breath from laughing and kissing, thinking that this will always be the way it is. Always tasting spicy cinnamon and sugary vanilla.

"Forever and ever," they whispered. Forever and ever.

The memory stings. It had been a couple of years before you and he had met. And he really had thought it was true, forever.

But things began to unravel, as they often do. Taemin began to unravel.

"Okay, so now, kill her."

Taemin's voice is like steel, slipping beneath Namjoon's skin and slicing. It makes Namjoon snap back to focus, the memory vanishing as if it had never been there at all.

Namjoon stands stock still. Fighting, now, to stay immovable.

Taemin sighs and runs his hands through Namjoon's hair, "I know you're in there fighting this," he says softly, "but once you do it, everything will be better. We'll be better. Forever and ever."

Something in Namjoon's stomach lurches unpleasantly at the realization that he doesn't recognize those eyes anymore. Something in them has turned dark and twisted in a way his Taemin was never capable of.

When Namjoon still doesn't move, Taemin's voice loses its softness and gains an authoritative edge, "Do it." The sound compels Namjoon past the point of disobeying; it's as though his blood has turned against him.

Inside his head, Namjoon's movements feel mechanical, he throws the entire force of his mind against them. Nothing.

You watch him approach with your heart in your throat. You don't really recognize him. His movements are so fluid that they look alien. Your Namjoon is a giant with long limbs that he's barely in control of, a perpetual look of thoughtfulness in his eyes, a soft smile reserved for you… This Namjoon is blank, an imitation; he's nothing at all.

He stoops down until your eyes are at the same level. Before you can take in another breath, his hand is around your throat. He stands to his full height and holds you above him like it takes no effort at all. You gasp for breath.

His fingers around your throat feel familiar and you're surprised that, this close to death, those kinds of memories surface. You watch his face for a flicker of his real self, think you see one in the very depths of his eyes, and whisper, "It's okay," because what else can you say. You're going to die. But it's not his fault.

That's what finally breaks him. It's okay. Namjoon, gripping the steel bars that are keeping him caged in his mind, breaks when he hears you say those words. "No it's fucking not," he screams in his head.

Control comes back to his limbs too fast and his knees buckle. You fall against him, both of you folding into each other as you land harshly on the ground. You can feel his breath against your cheek, and feel the anger brewing beneath his skin. One of his hands reaches out for you and grabs your wrist; it takes you a moment before you realize he's checking your pulse.

Satisfied, he rises slowly. His hair is falling into his face but you can see his eyes are blacked out. More surprisingly, there are long fangs now crowding his teeth, poking out over his lips. He spreads his hands wide and you see his nails have grown into claws, and sharp horns are sticking up from his head. In the blink of an eye, large, leathery black wings rip through his shirt and spread open.

You lose your breath.

"Stop," Taemin commands. But Namjoon rolls his shoulders, the joints in his wings cracking menacingly. He turns to him.

"Stop," Taemin says again, but this time it's a whimper.

Namjoon has never felt this powerful before. The wings are new. He hasn't conjured claws or horns since childhood. His rage is feeding his power and it's coming off of him in waves. And he doesn't care; his vision is red.

Usually, Namjoon's power sits just beneath his skin like a current of energy, one that he keeps at bay with an incredible amount of restraint (that took an even more incredible amount of practice). Right now he's like a live wire; the casing's been removed and he is nothing but raw power.

He stretches his wings behind him to their full span, cracking his neck as he grows used to his new appendages and this new surge of demonic energy. When he looks at Taemin he wants nothing more than to reach into his chest and pull out his heart. He wants to tear out his jugular. He wants to watch him burn.

You're so caught up in watching him that you don't realize Yoongi's free of his restraints until he's undoing yours. You jump at the feeling of his fingers against your wrists, startled by his bloody face and rasping voice, "We have to get out of here."

You roll your shoulders and rub at your wrists, wincing at the strain. "I can't leave," you say like it's obvious.

Yoongi looks at you like you're stupid, "Are you kidding me?"

You roll your eyes in response, "I'm not leaving him, Yoongi."

The room is getting warmer, like twelve o'clock on a summer day, and it takes you a second to realize it's coming from Namjoon. He's burning through demonic magic at a lightning speed and it's shedding off of him like the sun.

Yoongi wraps his fingers around your arm and pulls, "Come on," he huffs, "Look, he's like a …atom bomb right now. He could go off at any moment."

You wrench yourself from his grasp, "Why do you think I'm staying?"

Namjoon's hands close around Taemin's throat and squeeze. There's a flash of childish innocence in Taemin's eyes, but Namjoon is far past caring.

Burns appear on Taemin's skin from proximity to the demonic energy and his windpipe gives beneath the forces of Namjoon's grip. Namjoon doesn't blink.

It's the most demonic you've ever seen him.

"Namjoon!" you scream.

You're afraid if he doesn't stop now he won't come back. You're afraid of losing him.

"Namjoon," you sob.

You force yourself to a stand, fighting through the demonic energy that makes your eyes sting and your skin blister. You whisper his name to anchor you, to tether him to you. You move forward till he turns.

He looks almost like a medieval painting. Horns and wings and claws. But his eyes are familiar, inky black pools like starless galaxies you could lose yourself in.

"It's okay," you whisper, reaching out to him. "It's okay," you say again as you reach him, fingers pressing gently to his jaw and his cheeks.

His brow wrinkles at the touch, a distinctly human expression overtaking his demonic form. The back of one hand wipes your cheek softly. You're crying.

Namjoon falls to his knees and with him all the magic. Taemin is on the ground and whatever was keeping him alive is gone now.

Namjoon has collapsed into you, but you can feel his breath against your neck so you know he's going to be okay. His hands are around your waist like a life preserver, and you can feel the scrape of his fangs against your skin.

"It's okay," you whisper, running your fingers through his hair just to prove to yourself that he's still here, he's still yours. "Just keep breathing," you whisper, tears falling down your cheeks without your noticing. Behind him is what remains of Taemin and you have to close your eyes. It's so horrific. Your eyes and nose sting with the smell of burning flesh.

You only open them when you hear footsteps. Jin is leading the charge, stomping in at a heavy run, skidding to a stop when he sees the scene. "Oh my god," he whispers, covering his mouth with his hand. Shortly after him, Yoongi limps in, leaning heavily against Jeongguk. And then ten seconds later, Hoseok follows with a large group of security.

"They're all…" Jin starts.

"…dead," Yoongi finishes, finally giving in to his exhaustion and collapsing against Jeongguk's side.

"Outside," Hoseok says, "Medics…" He speaks in short bursts, unable to form full sentences while he can barely process what he's seeing.

You take a deep breath and move your hand to cup Namjoon's face. His eyes are still entirely black, and his fangs still long past his teeth. You can feel his claws press harmlessly against your sides.

"Okay," you whisper, stroking his cheek softly to erase his pained expression, "You have to come back now, okay? For me."

Namjoon leans forward and presses his forehead against yours, nodding slightly. His body grows tense in your grasp and you can see his chin jut out in concentration. Slowly, the fangs retract, the wings disappear…when he opens his eyes, they are the soft brown you know so well.

"Hey there," you whisper.

"Hey," he whispers before passing out.

When Namjoon wakes up his head feels as though it's been split open, his back feels broken, his hands ache. His whole body feels completely spent and rundown. He blinks against the lights of the hospital room and groans involuntarily against the pain in his head.

"Oh my god," he hears. Your voice is tear-soaked and relieved, but he recognizes it immediately. You materialize at his bedside and grip his hand tightly, "Hi," you whisper.

"Hi." He smiles when you lean down and press your lips to his chastely.

There's a long moment where you both just look at each other, relieved that you've both survived, that it's... over. Your eyes are watering and you blink, laughing lightly, "I...I should probably get a doctor."

"No, don't go," he says, almost in a whine like a child.

"Okay," you grin despite yourself. Forgetting his wounds, you lean your head against his, pulling away sharply when he gasps in pain.

"Why does my head hurt so bad?" He mutters.

"Oh," you smile, "um…" you pull a compact from your purse and hand it to him.

"Oh shit," he says, watching his own expression in the mirror. There are deep purple bruises around his eyes, two perfect circles still healing in his forehead.

"Horns," you whisper, trying to keep yourself from giggling.

"So, my back…?"

"Wings," you nod, smiling fully.

Namjoon chuckles too, reaching up to stroke your cheek, "Guess I was pretty upset." He smiles softly and you turn your face to press a soft kiss to the center of his palm.

"Careful," a voice says from the doorway, "don't scratch her, Wolverine."

You both turn to see Yoongi, bruised but smiling, and Jeongguk pushing him into the room in a wheelchair. Namjoon's eyes flick to his own hands and he immediately curses at the long, sharp claws. He throws his head back onto the pillow in frustration and groans.

"I tried to trim them myself," you blush, "but they kept breaking the nail files."

"Yeah," he sighs, his eyes still closed, "sandpaper is the only thing tough enough."

"I'll ask Lisa to pick some up," Jeongguk chuckles.

"How long was I out?" he wonders, eyes moving to the three of you in turn.

"About a week," you say softly.

"And Taemin?"

There's a long, awkward silence before Yoongi says, "Let's just say it makes the bone-breaking incident look like child's play."

"So he's dead?"

You nod solemnly, looking down at your hands. Gently, Namjoon fits his into yours, squeezing. "We're safe."

author’s note— i know this took forever and a day, i hope it was worth the wait

epilogue ↝

for more of my works check out my m.list

[daybreak-delusion]

Chapter 8

Introduction: Whitney Goodwinson was planning on inheriting one of her deceased grandmother's properties, but not a little house off the coast of North Carolina.  As she struggles to meet new people, fix up her new property, deal with troublemaker JJ Maybank, and perfect her grandmother's infamous lemonade, she might just find that the Outer Banks has more to offer than it seems. 

Series Masterlist 

Previous Chapter

The drive back from The Wreck was as smooth as a ride in an old Volkswagen could be. It wasn’t that bad of a sight either. Through the trees, I could catch glimpses of the beach and water. I could make out little surfers trying to catch waves, fishermen trying to haul in their catches, and tourists getting sunburnt on their towels. I decided to stop at the park I saw on my way to The Wreck and eat my lunch. There were large tall trees good for climbing surrounding a playset with a couple of benches and picnic tables. I sat on a bench closer to the playset and dug in. JJ wasn’t kidding this sandwich was exactly what I needed to get over my hunger and my fires? Oh my god, I could kill for another batch. There were a couple of kids playing on the playset that looked like a lawsuit waiting to happen. They were oblivious to their danger however as they played tag around the swing set. I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I had as much fun as those kids were and wondered if I’d ever be that happy again. On that depressing note, I decided to leave so their mothers wouldn’t peg me as a pedophile. 

Before heading back to the Lemon House I looked up a market to get some groceries. The store didn’t have the biggest variety, but I got what I needed: pasta, fruits, vegetables, beans, almonds, rice, Skinny Pop, and other kinds of snacks. If I planned my meals correctly I should have enough for the rest of the month. I also took note of the hardware store that was next to it and decided I would come back tomorrow for paint and other supplies for touching up the house. When I got back it took a couple of trips, but I finally got all the groceries inside. I walked outside with JJ’s burger to see the golden boy throwing away a bag of weeds. 

“Hey, Golden Boy!” I yelled walking over to him. 

“Ah miss Sunshine how was The Wreck,” he replied, wiping off some sweat on his face with the bottom of his shirt giving me a view of his incredibly toned abs. I assumed he had a good body based on the look of his arms, but hot damn this boy could be a Greek god. What I would do to get his boy to let me put- 

“Hello,” JJ yelled, snapping his fingers at me, “how was The Wreck?” 

“Hm oh yeah, it was fine,” I stupidly replied, praying that he didn’t notice my ogling, “Um I got you a burger, Kie said it was your favorite.” 

“Aww Sunshine you didn’t have to do that,” he said grabbing the bag and scarfing down the burger. 

“No problem, so you get everything done?” I asked him, taking his trash. I ignored the voice in the back of my head praying that he still had more stuff to do. 

“Yeah I just finished up for the day, unless you have any other pressing matters you need me to satisfy,” he teased, giving me his heart-melting smirk. I would have been more smitten if he didn’t have a piece of lettuce in his teeth. 

“In your dreams Golden Boy,” I tried to say confidently, but it came out more like a stutter. 

“Every night Sunshine.” 

“We met yesterday dummy, remember that you still work for me so keep your dreams at bay.” 

“Whatever you say, boss lady, don’t miss me too much tomorrow,” he said as we walked over to the front of the house. 

“Trust me I’ll be able to manage,” I said as we approached a rusty, red dirt bike, “I’ll have your new schedule by Monday, you still good with helping me fix up a couple of things around the house right?” 

“Yeah, yeah sure thing, but you’ll pay me extra right?” he clarified, raising his eyebrows. 

“Yes JJ I’m true to my word, but it probably won't be as much as my Grandmother paid you. Is $15 an hour okay?” 

“Eh, I don’t know about that Sunshine. My price per hour is a little bit higher than that.” 

“Don’t play me JJ minimum wage here is like $7 be lucky I’m not giving you $10.” 

“Fine, fine can't blame me for trying,” he said climbing on to the bike, “see ya later Sunshine!” 

And just like that, he was off down the road with a cloud of dust behind him. I couldn't help but notice the sad feeling in my chest as I watched this boy drive away. God, what was wrong with me, I had met him what? Yesterday? This was ridiculous. But it wasn’t until JJ was gone when I realized how lonely I actually was. I’ve had my share of loneliness of course, but I always had someone to be there for me whether it was a teacher or the librarian or even Grandmother sometimes. But now she was gone and here I was longing for the company of a boy that almost went to juvie. Great. 

Pushing my feelings down I turned back to the house and went inside. In the kitchen, the lemons had been placed in a white bowl on the counter by a certain Golden Boy. I was then filled with energy as I remembered what task I had planned to take on today: making Grandmother’s lemonade. How hard could it be right? Apparently really fucking hard. 

First of all, it took me forever to find a knife of all things. Then I had to find a bowl or a jug or something to put the lemon juice in. Then I had to look up a YouTube video on how to juice the freakin lemons and on top of that my first try, I squirted lemon juice in my eye which was absolutely agonizing. After that it went kinda smoothly, I added water and some sugar and was finally finished. Too bad it tasted horrible. It had too much pulp in it and was so sour my eyes started watering. I had to spit out the poison I had made into the sink. Giving up I dumped the rest of the liquid and started to clean up my mess. While washing dishes I looked out the window above the sink outside to see an amazing sunset. The sky was a gorgeous orange color that took up the whole sky. It was breathtaking. Dusk was always my favorite time of the day. Everything and everyone seems to be calmer as the day winds to an end. After I finished cleaning up my failure I decided to turn in for the night, but not before making a plan for the house. 

I had planned on using the money that I had inherited from Grandmother to pay for the refurbishing of the house and to pay JJ. Now, Grandmother had mostly taken care of everything in the house, but the outside was another story. Firstly the whole house inside and out needed a good dusting. The house also needed a new coat of paint along with the garage. Speaking of the garage it needed to be cleaned out and I was even debating tearing it down and just building a new one, but I vetoed that idea. The garden in the front of the house along with the flower boxes needed to be replanted which would be easy. The back porch was nice, but I wanted to see what I could do with it. Maybe paint the porch and get some new furniture. It definitely needed some sort of fan or cooling system, but we’ll get there when we get there. I also hadn’t seen the greenhouse up close, but I could tell it needed a good wash. It would take a while, but hopefully, JJ would be a good help. Maybe he could help me in other ways too. Stop. But why? Because I barely know this guy and it’s not like I’m an expert in flirting or making boys fall for me and why am I even considering this? He’s working for me if I hooked up with him that would only complicate everything. There were also my suspicions about Kie and JJ and the last thing I wanted to become was a homewrecker. Emotions and relationships are not my cup of tea and I’m just here for the summer. Well, the summers not over yet! This is going to be a long month.

a/n: Poor Whitney so lonely, but that’ll change soon! thank you so much for reading I cannot express how excited I get when people like my chapters, it really mean a lot to me! Only one chapter today, but the next one will take a turn! Stay tuned!  

[wexregolden]

It’s afternoon now and I got a few hours of sleep which is great 👌🏼 And my brain is kinda working again so I can finally write a little more of what I’m thinking.

I was kinda afraid because, well, every s4 so far kind of fucked up but I have to admit that I really really enjoyed this one!

LUDOVICO FUCKING BESSEGATO IS BACK!!! And Besse really slapped this season!! I don’t know what to even say about the talent of that man - he’s back with his gorgeous shoots and cinematography and I respect that! 😌 Thanks to him for the changes he did during the season, that made the story so fitting into their world and country. The genius of season 1 and 2 is back and I love what he did with season 4!

Sana was stunning this season, wow! I really loved Bea’s acting and interpretation of Sana. She was so gentle, kind, loving and fierce and I loved her a lot this season! She is flawed, definitely, and she makes mistakes but that’s what made her seem so real. I love her bond with the girlsquad, that scene with them damaging the car and getting Sana into their middle again was so beautiful and made me cry. I especially loved the Sana x Eva dynamics. And don’t get me started on her family! Her mom is an angel <3

The way they portrayed religion seemed so beautiful but I’m not going deeper into this one and judging it as I’m not in the place to do so without being a muslim myself. Gonna stick to Elia’s saying and not talk about something I don’t know about. (Also, that Elia and Sana thing??😂)

Malik and Sana literally were the cutest and I love what Ludo did to their relationship a lot. That scene at the end with him and the kids being in the greenhouse? Sana standing outside and waving at him? Definitely the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Also the scene with them being at the pool, Sana wearing her burqini? Poetic cinema!

I know it’s Sana’s season and I love how this one actually was about her, that there was way less drama that wasn’t around her or took away her time to shine. Ludo managed to somehow connect nearly everything to her and I love his work here. But I still need to mention my boys Marti and Nico. I like how they didn’t only treat them in the background somewhere, kissing a little and that’s it but still their drama somehow made sense in Sana’s story. Still, Marti was a little bitch sometimes this season, who would have guessed I’d say that one day. Some of his actions felt a little out of character when you still have s2 Marti in the back of your head. But he’s a dumbass and emotional and confused teenager so I kind of get his actions even if I’m not the biggest fan of them but guess it might be real? But at least it all turned out good and the beach scene was the cutest 🌈

The Marti and Sana talk *chef kiss* 👌🏼😘 I loved the og bench scene when I watched it first but the more often I watched it the more it bothered me. Isak trying to tell Sana how to act regarding hate as he know it himself... even if racism & islamophobia and homophobia are totally different things. That’s why I appreciate so much what skamit did there and that Martini didn’t try to teach Sana anything or say they’re the same. He looked at it from different perspectives and established that racism and homophobia isn’t the same but that he can still kind of feel Sana’s struggle.

Filippo was the hero of the season and I love how everyone came to him and asked for help. He’s a darling. And hilarious. PRAISE FILIPPO. I love that they picked the found family trope up again 🤧

Gio, ahhh my boy! He’s such a lovely character and I loved him so much this season. And him telling Canegallo to get in line.... SLAY!!! Also Gioeva endgame!!! ❤️ Let’s not talk about that sex scene tho, I’m trying to forget it. But hey, at least they’ve showed safe sex 👌🏼

THE SOUNDTRACK!!!!! Where does Ludo find all those PERFECT songs for each situation??? WHERE? The soundtrack was once again perfect this season, I loved it so so so much! It’s perfect and I already have so many of the songs stuck in my head.

I just have to mention the hide and seek scene here which somehow became one of my favourites in the whole show, don’t ask. It was so beautiful and emotional! I started crying the moment Nico walked through the dark house on his own and the moment he entered the room with Marti in it, it was over for me! AND THE SONG CHOICE. I love their friends playing “matchmaker”, locking them in and forcing them to make up, love it. It was the perfect picture between it being sad, emotional but so funny and cute too. And the desperation and tension you could feel between Marti and Nico ufff.

Loved the different POV clips at the end, it was so well done! The Luca and Nico one probably were my favourites.

The hug that Luca gave Silvia 🥺🥺🥺

And Marti being like “Can we throw that fisherman into the water?”YES BOY. Always hard to see homophobia like that :(

Oh, but I also loved the Filippo one. Him taking a std test and Ele and him swearing to always use condoms? LOVE ME SOME GOOD SAFE SEX TALK! And I’ve missed their sibing-dynamic <3

The ending was a masterpiece! I love how the show started and ended with Gioeva and them reading texts from each other. And them getting together again YES ENDGAME ❤️ I was a sobbing mess when the shots at the beach started, it was just so so so beautiful! Them jumping into the water together, cinematographic masterpiece, Besse strikes again! I was a sobbing mess and probably understood way too little of the last clip but it was still so beautiful and such a bittersweet ending, I loved it but I’m sad at the same time ✨

Skam Italia always handled the character developments and their relationships and friendships so well, that’s what I love so much about the show. So I loved how they brought all of them together one last time and showed that they rock the whole relationship part! 💕

I’m still way too emotional about everything that happened in the last hours so I’m surprised I even managed to write all of that here and I’m sorry for every possible mistake I made. Still wanted to write down all my feelings somehow. I could still cry about it being over for now but I’m so glad it happened and I got to witness it. Especially after crying in the middle of the city after the news of the cancellation. That’s what makes getting s4 even more special and I’m so grateful. Skam Italia and all the characters mean the world to me and I’m so thankful for them and the story that made me realise it’s okay to be different, not straight, it’s okay to not feel well and lonely and that you’re allowed to express those feelings. And most of all it taught me one thing: Tu non sei solo. ❤️

Grazie mille Skam Italia 💛

[ladyfl4me]

A,E,F,G,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z ;o

Okay *cracks knuckles* let’s go! F, M, and S have already been taken from this list, so feel free to send in... B, C, D, or H, I guess. Yeehaw. This is really fucking long.

A: How did you come up with the title to [TMWCIFTC]? -- It started, as many things do, as a bad pun. The novel The Spy who Came In from the Cold was a cold-war spy thriller, about a British spy who goes over to East Germany as an apparent defect, except he’s actually there to spread misinformation and fuck shit up. He falls in love, becomes disillusioned with his superiors, and is shot dead over the corpse of his lover after climbing over to the east side of the wall. Needless to say, this is nowhere close to what happens in TMWCIFTC. I chose it early on because of the literal meaning: there’s a moth(man), he’s coming in from the cold WV weather, boom shaka laka, we have a title. Over time, though, it’s evolved into another meaning. Indrid himself is coming in from an isolated, lonely existence: he’s rejoining the family that cut ties with him, he’s in love, he’s warm and safe. The moth sure did come in from the cold, and hopefully he stays that way.

E: If you wrote a sequel to [TMWCIFTC], what would it be about? -- Hm. Considering my entire TAZ fic career is a tangled hairball of sequels and prequels, I kind of have this base covered. At the moment, TCOS - aka The Children of Sylvain, the sequel to TMWCIFTC - is about three things: a Pine Guard road trip race against time and the feds, the Spanish Sylvan Inquisition That Nobody Expected (least of all Jake and Hollis, who have to set aside their differences and past conflicts to save Kepler - and who knows, maybe they’ll fall in love along the way), and Alexandra the Interpreter getting woke to Sylvan politics and doing what she can from the inside to change them. In other words, it’s going to be a massive sequel that is the finale of the Amnesty alternate universe I’ve created. It’s this series’ Endgame. (That reminds me, I need an actual title for this collection of stories I’m writing. The “Tin Cinematic Universe” doesn’t quite have the ring to it that I’d like.)

G: Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order? -- eh, it kind of depends. It’s like a buffering bar on Youtube videos. I outline what I can until I run out of ideas, then start writing, then add outlines to the end, until the outline is complete and I just have to keep writing.

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)? -- I don’t have one for reading, but for writing, I fucking love structuring chapters around songs. Classical or otherwise, I love music. All my stories play in my head like a movie screen, and I just do my best to describe what I’m seeing in my head with an accompanying score. It’s not so much a guilty pleasure as it is a writing process. Frankly, I don’t think I actually have a guilty pleasure; the act of writing itself is all the happiness I need.

J: Write or describe an alternative ending to [insert fic]. -- An alternate ending for The Devil Went Down To Georgia would be... interesting. It ended with Boyd-as-Jersey-Devil scaring the pants off some poor broke college kid, who stole his worthless fiddle; then he changed back, and he and Ned went on their merry way to go break into Aubrey’s house and send everything down the drain. If there was one thing that I could change in there, it would be how fast Ned ran. If he ran a little faster, he would have seen the alley; he would have witnessed Boyd turning into the Jersey Devil, or at least turning back into himself; and he’d get a very rude awakening as to what Sylvans are and that his partner (in crime, and everything that mattered) was a fucking cryptid. God, that’d be a fun AU to write. Who knows, I might go do that someday.

K: What’s the angstiest idea you’ve ever come up with? -- At the moment, the only angsty idea that I’m actually conceptualizing is a Hollis/Jake angsty breakup for TSG. (Spoilers, I guess.) I once wrote a very grimdark ending to TMWCIFTC where everyone fell through the ice and drowned. It wasn’t fun. I’ve also mentally killed off each Amnesty protagonist and NPC in various ways, but I never felt comfortable writing them down. I only write angst with a happy ending because those are the kinds of stories I need to hear.

L: How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting? -- 9 times out of 10, I just throw it into the void. I write as much as I can in big chunks, and then kind of hope for the best. TMWCIFTC, for example, is a completely unedited, unbetaed vomit draft. I usually do a quick reread of my oneshots to catch grammar and spelling errors, but other than that I just trust myself that it’s fine.

N: Is there a fic you wish someone else would write (or finish) for you? -- Can I get some kind of resolution for To the Edge of Night? Can I please get some kind of resolution for To the Edge of Night??? I was 14 chapters into that bastard before I a) became a more casual MCU fan and b) discovered TAZ. It was such a niche fic with such a niche structure - LOTR as galactic Asgardian propaganda to cover up Odin’s mistakes - that at some point I lost interest in it. I just saw Endgame though, so now I might get some inspiration for stuff to bastardize.

O: How do you begin a story–with the plot, or the characters? -- Characters. When coming up with character backstories, I can usually find ways to slot their lives together that necessitate a plot. I love character-driven stories, where their actions actually do shit and their words actually mean something, in favor of getting dragged along behind the plot like tin cans behind a car.

P: Are you what George R. R. Martin would call an “architect” or a “gardener”? (How much do you plan in advance, versus letting the story unfold as you go?) -- I’m definitely an architect, but in a really messy way. My friends can attest that I do an insane amount of planning for each story - often in their DMs, sorry about that, Fae, Cro, Indy and Aline 😬 - and all that usually ends up in a stream-of-consciousness rant outline on Google Drive. Knowing where the story is going helps me a lot, but the planning I do is definitely just building flower beds in which to sow seeds. Or building a greenhouse. I plan the bare bones of a story, and things get really wild within it, but it does follow a logical plot structure.

Q: How do you feel about collaborations? -- I have a lot of respect for the people who can successfully pull it off, but idk if i’d ever want to do one myself. I get really possessive of my stories and ideas and like to be the one in charge of their execution. That being said, some collabs have produced amazing stories. I don’t mind reading collab fics, but actually being in a collab grates on me more than it should.

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence? -- I’m definitely influenced heavily by Neil Gaiman. I read American Gods and Good Omens a lot while I was trying to write TMWCIFTC; not only was it a good brain break, but I was able to pick up a lot of tips on scene pacing, concise yet expressive language, and character interactions. My creative wriitng professors have always told us to read so we know what to steal - not in terms of content, but in execution. 

On the fanfic side, @miamaroo is a huge inspiration for me. I’ve been reading Northern Migration a lot recently, and I love how its canon divergence is so worldshaking and so complex, but is still familiar in nostalgic yet terrifying ways. I read it back in October, went, “Huh, I wanna do something that wild. And if miamaroo can do it then I sure as fuck can too,” and I started planning TMWCIFTC during that one month dead zone the McElroys took last year. Northern Migration is one of the best, most coherent, most stunning, and most incredibly written TAZ Balance AUs I’ve ever read, and if I hadn’t read it, I wouldn’t have been inspired to take the fuckall huge plunge into TMWCIFTC.

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist? -- Bed sharing and cuddling, hand kissing, wrist kissing, whump, sympathetic villains. Canon divergent AUs are my absolute favorite things to both read and write. Anything that would turn me into Charlie Kelly slamming his finger on a bulletin board screaming, “CAROL,” is a fic I would give my life for. 

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand? -- Not a fan of a) woobification and b) flat villain characterization, to the point where the story is riding on villain tropes instead of an actual person or plot. Character nuance is always something I look for when I read. I don’t usually get bitter about tropes, though; some stuff, when subverted, works really well. I fully subscribe to don’t like, don’t read, don’t write, which is why I don’t write anything that warrants AO3 content warning tags or an Explicit rating, in favor of focusing on plot. Every author has a reason for what they write and how - be it their level of experience, personal preference, or simply the joy of writing something and getting it out there - and I respect that. Within reason, of course.

U: Share three of your favorite fic writers and why you like them so much. -- 

@miamaroo, for reasons I’ve already discussed. My favorite TAZ Balance author hands down. Read Northern Migration and give it the love it deserves, or I’m replacing all the faucets in your house with silly straws.

@transagentstern. Fae has a bunch of absolutely incredible fics and an amazing grasp on characterization. We come from the same place with AUs, in that canon is but the bare planks on which we put the drywall of our plot an characterization. They structure AUs and character backstories from the ground up in believable and emotionally raw ways. Also they have great music taste. I especially like their interpretation of Indrid in Moth to the Flame; he, like all the other characters in the story, is far from perfect, and his character arc is explored in relatable ways that I love to read. 

@keplersheetz. Aline - theneonpineapple on AO3 - researches like a motherfucker and has a wealth of knowledge/experience/viewpoints to draw on, making author-author interactions with her an absolute delight. She’s also doing the lord’s work with rarepairs. Spin a wheel, find a ship, and she’s probably written for it or at least conceptualized it. Reading her character studies and stories of the old Pine Guard - aka Mama’s original crew, before the current PCs joined - is always a delight. I’ve also hashed out a lot of details for The Children of Sylvain, especially for Mr. Boyd Mosche, guilt-wracked Jersey Devil extraordinaire, with her help. 

V: If you could write the sequel (or prequel) to any fic out there not written by yourself, which would you choose? -- Not gonna lie, I’m fine with a lot of stuff that’s out there right now. It’s been a hot few months since I’ve actually stopped to read fic, but from what I recall, most of the fics I’ve read have done a good job of keeping things intact.

W: Do you like more general prompts, or more specific ones? -- The vaguer, the better. With really specific prompts, it usually feels as if the story’s been written for me already; with vague, general prompts, I have more agency to explore my own ideas. Some accompanying detail is usually nice, though. For example, the coffee shop/college/flower shop AUs that @transagentstern​ wrote are my ideal prompt for drabbles: premise, a little bit of open-ended detail, clear explanation of what’s going to happen while leaving the rest up to the imagination. Good stuff. If it’s for a long-form piece, though, I prefer full agency, or even just some time to lie facedown in the dirt and wait for an idea to strike me.

X: A character you enjoy making suffer. -- Yes.

Y: A character you want to protect. -- Tim.

Z: Major character death–do you ever write/read it? Is there a character whose death you can’t tolerate? -- I do read lots of major character death, yeah, though not always for TAZ. There’s something cathartic about seeing a character die, but sometimes it sits wrong with me in ways that I don’t like. As for writing, I’d rather kill a character for a reason rather than for shock value/for the Feels, though said Feels can accompany the reason. 

[agirlinhell-a]

munday meme: what's a plot/plots you wanna write that you've never written? what are your favorite hobbies? what are you favorite/least favorite foods? what's a plot that you will never touch? if you had to rp as a different character/characters, who would they be? what would be your irl fc as clem you would pick? if you could visit anywhere in the world for your birthday, where would it be?

what’s a plot/plots you wanna write that you’ve never written? 

I have an entire wishlist tag for this!! If I were to pick the ones I really crave for, it’d have to be:

Clementine’s travels with Omid and Christa in the two year timeskip after Lee’s death. I feel as if this transition is extremely important to Clementine’s character, as Omid and Christa took care of her far longer than Lee, Kenny or Jane - and arguably better - than any of them ever did. The moment Omid died, Clementine lost hope in the world again and her mentality becomes a lot more depressing.

The aftermath of Clementine’s exile from The New Frontier and being separated from AJ - from her last talk with Ava to her time alone and then in Prescott, and her dark time spent there. It’s all very much headcanon based, but this is where Clementine truly becomes her own person, this is where she truly grows fiercer, this is where she learns to fight back and become harder and stronger. This is her time when there is no one looking out for her, no one is there to watch her back, and all she has is herself. During her time in The New Frontier, she was a medic and supply runner, but then she steadily grows into one of the group’s fiercest fighters, with help from Ava, who teaches her how to fight and archery, morse code, parkour and survival tactics - Ava is a woman trained in the army, and Clementine took her teachings to heart. During her time in Prescott, Clementine descends into a much darker mentality and it’s possibly the darkest place where she’s ever been and she starts doing many morally questionable things. This is her transition from Season Two to A New Frontier. For a year, Prescott would be her home and it would shape her into someone much darker and demented beyond recognition. That sweet little girl that her parents had raised and Lee had protected was gone in that city, almost like she’d never existed. Whenever she walked into a bar, she could hear the hushed whispers of “it’s THAT girl,” “poor thing”, “didn’t she shoot a walker point blank in the face?”. No one knew her real name, as she never gave it out, so they resorted to naming her “Hellgirl” and Clementine relished in her new identity. She quickly found herself being a mythical figure - and even a bit of a celebrity - a girl of her stature having survived this far into the apocalypse.She learns how to ride a horse and ride a motorcycle in Prescott. She stole, murdered, drank, smoked, got high and gambled… in fact, she made a living out of it as a child mercenary. She was living in sin all at age twelve. She had managed to become quite the thief, as well, as she was light and quick on her feet. At one point, she even owned a bar and had hired wayward men and women to guard her.That girl is gone now, faded with time, yet her wildness is only barely concealed by a stonewalled composure.

Clementine and her time spent at Wellington - I feel as if this would be really sweet to see, something for her to look forward to, somewhere it’s safe for her and AJ… until it’s destroyed, at least.

Clementine finally arriving at the McCaroll Ranch and reuniting with AJ... and the possible events that might’ve occurred there.

Clem learning flower language from a book in Ericson’s greenhouse and giving flowers with their own respective meanings to people.

-Clementine dealing with her own mental health issues.

-Clementine becoming a pagan witch and a beginner in witchcraft.

-Ericson’s being haunted by the deaths of Marlon, Brody and Mitch… and who knows whoever… or whatever else lingers through the campus?

-GROUP THREADS!! MORE THAN TWO MUNS IN A THREAD!! PLEASE GIVE THEM BAC K I MISS THEM!

Card games with the Ericson’s squad!!

-Clementine experimenting with her sexual orientation.

-Clementine experimenting with her gender identity.

-Clementine discovering and learning more about her African heritage.

-threads where muses talk about things that confuse them.

-threads where muses talk about things that have hurt them in the past.

-threads where muses talk about their deepest fears.

-threads where muses talk about sexual and romantic orientation and relationships (past and present !!)

-THREADS WHERE MUSES HAVE DEEP CONVERSATIONS AND ARE VULNERABLE WITH EACH OTHER.

-Clem as a babysitter to Tenn, Willy and AJ.

-CLEMENTINE AS A MOTHER AND ACTUALLY SETTLING DOWN WITH SOMEONE AND BEING HAPPY.

-CLEM LIVING UNTIL SHE’S AN OLD LADY AND DYING PEACEFULLY IN HER BED SURROUNDED BY HER CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN AND FRIENDS.

-AU where the original concepts that were planned for Season Two and Season Three: A New Frontier happen to Clementine… and make her a much darker character. However, I must warn you that this AU would not be for the faint of heart and contains heavy, mature themes. It is arguably a lot worse than what she endures in canon, and that’s saying a lot. Clementine’s mind slowly becomes darker and demented the more she ages, she begins to look at the world in a nepotistic way, and she will do whatever it takes to survive, and she will brutally murder whoever stands in her way. Basically, this is a much darker version of Clementine and a lot of things in her canon change, i.e AJ is dead, Kenny is more or less Clementine’s enemy, etc.. This verse begins in Season Two and will continue onward from there. HERE IS THE LINK. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

-AU where Clementine is taken in and trained as a soldier of the Delta against her own will or otherwise.

-Modern AU scenarios!! Youtube Channels, vines, memes, shenanigans!!

-ROADTRIP AU!! BASED OFF OF THIS POST!! I JUST NEED THE SQUAD TO BE NORMAL KIDS FOR ONCE AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT BEING KIDNAPPED OR BEING DEVOURED BY WALKERS???? I WANT THEM TO BE HAPPY AND CAREFREE?? IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK????

-Interactions between Clementine, AJ, CJ and Clem’s pet tigress, Rani, based off of THIS POST. Honestly, Clementine and AJ are one hella awesome duo, but add that in with Omid and Christa’s child and oh, I dunno, A FUCKING GIANT TIGER is even BETTER. Also, CJ and AJ are a lot like brothers and their bond is just so wholesome. CJ’s witty and lighthearted and is one of the only people capable of calming AJ down - CJ is also more analytical and calmer than AJ is. I just want Rani to be feral, scary but also soft and sweet - she has an appetite for walkers and the living alike, and she’s not completely tamed, but she’s mostly cool with most humans, but harm Clementine or the two kids and she will rip you apart and eat you. Clementine found her in an abandoned zoo back in Season Two and has been taking care of her ever since... and now, Rani is HUGE. God forbid you trespass on her eating, that’s not a good time. Also, I just wanna see other muses’ reactions to this huge tiger that Clem easily pets and cuddles with.

-Clem becoming a Whisperer, perhaps with James and Charlie? I haven’t read the comics yet, but I know a bit of what happens and what the Whisperers are really like. It’d be really cool to see Clementine in this kind of scenario - but I don’t think she’d be the same girl we see in canon.

-Clem joining settlements from the comics (i.e Hilltop, Alexandria, the Commonwealth, etc.)

-CLEMENTINE IN HER PRIME AND BECOMING HEADMISTRESS OF ERICSON’S WHILE REBUILDING IT AND MAKING IT AN ACTUAL SCHOOL FOR SURVIVORS AND ALL THE WHILE DREAMING OF A BETTER WORLD - AN AGE WITHOUT WALKERS.

-Harry Potter AU!!

-Naruto AU!!

-ASOIAF/GOT AU's!!

...and a lot more, but those are the ones I really, really want!

what are your favorite hobbies? 

Hmmm.. reading, writing, making aesthetics and moodboards, daydreaming, listening to music and cuddling with my cats!

what are you favorite/least favorite foods? 

MMMMMM PIZZA ICECREAM APPLES PURPLE GRAPES AND COOKIES!! As for foods I don’t like, uhhhhhh… veggies???? Idk I’m not a fan, SOMEONE BEAT MY ASS

what’s a plot that you will never touch? 

Hmmm… honestly, I don’t think there’s any plots I will never refuse? I’m roleplaying a girl growing up in the apocalypse, after all, so I’m very willing to roleplay morally questionable topics and threads with dark themes? In fact, I encourage it! Please don’t ever hesitate to plot with me no matter how dark it is!!

if you had to rp as a different character/characters, who would they be? 

Uhhhh… hmmm, I have a lot of ideas from many different fandoms! If I were to pick a few muses, it’d be Daenerys Targaryen from ASOIAF, Nymeria, the Princess of Ny Sar who ended up ruling Dorne from ASOIAF, Lyanna Stark from ASOIAF, Uchiha Madara from the Naruto series, Terumi Mei from the Naruto series, and maybe Luna Lovegood from the Harry Potter series.

what would be your irl fc as clem you would pick? 

At the moment, Amandla Stenberg, especially with her Modern AU’s! A lot of people pick Zendaya and I just… why??? She looks NOTHING like Clem??? I’m very picky with my IRL FC’s but it took a long while to pick an IRL fc. Thanks to all of Amandla’s pics with her hair in braids, cornrows and the likes, I just really want Clem with traditional African hairstyles??????  GIVE THAT BLACK SCORPIO QUEEN SOME COOL HAIRSTYLES!!

if you could visit anywhere in the world for your birthday, where would it be?

God… ANYWHERE? Preferably somewhere in Eastern Asia, Europe or in the Caribbean, because those places just sound so amazing and fantastic to me? Canada doesn’t have a lot of cool things in comparison to those countries imho so it’d be nice to be somewhere else. If we want to be REALLY specific, possibly Kyoto, Japan, Shanghai, China, West Palm Beach, Florida or Jaipur, India.

[wolfenwingsshop]

Sooo, I posted this on Twitter but, here we go, double-posting back here too.

So, I'm going to challenge myself this week. I suuuuck at drawing X. It's not that he's hard to draw! No. He's quite simple. It's me. The problem is me. It's always been me. I start to doodle and then once it becomes obvious it's X, I choke. I never finish. T_T 

I blame most of this on my upbringing, because I was a fat kid (and now fat adult) I was taught I do not deserve to exist. I firmly believed for a very long time (and still do,) that I am more beneficial to people dead than alive. Why does this mean anything about X? This: I still have a horribly huge crush on that damned blue robot, & because of being told MY ENTIRE LIFE because I am a fatass I shouldn't even think about being involved romantically with ANYTHING. well. There y'go. There's also that my family found out eventually and teased me.

Like, my little sister, love her, but she's skinny as hell and retired professional cosplayer- she'd ether be in my corner or attacking me with our 'friends' growing up. My mom just rolls her eyes if I start gushing about X. (Yet she has gotten into BTS, the K-Pop group, and I am supportive.)

There's also the fact that I got pretty publicly attacked on Tumblr fairly early on because I noticed during the MVCI development, yeah. They fixed Chun Li's face? They also gave X an OBVIOUS pubic bulge and my X fangirl ass ate it up. So, I'm used to being shamed for this.

So... my husband totally ships humans/humanoids with furries. I ship humans/humanoids with anything that isn't the same species, robots, reploids, seamonsters, idgaf it's an awesome trope. (Hello Avatar and The Shape of Water, freakin’ A I still haven’t seen The Shape of Water but GODDAMNIT I WILL ASAP) Because of this we both ship the idea of a certain blue reploid with my OC. Yknow, my icon right there. It's an old-as-hell art I did eooons ago (20+ years) when I was roleplaying, managed to hook up with the X in said RP, things happened and my OC got pregnant. The X in that RP was the adopted brother of my dear friend, NovaStrike. Nova and her wife currently live with me, we drove down to NC to save them from being kicked out by Nova’s abusive as fuck parents at the start of the new year.

Anyhow, back then, Nova found out X and my OC had hooked up in that way and was IMMEDIATELY screaming ROLL FOR PREGNANCY!!!! long story short, the dice favored X being a dad. Annnd his RPer was totally ok with it. That's where my icon comes from. They had a little wolf-eared girl with brown hair and green eyes that we named Kasumi, as I was a big DOA fan, as well, and thought it was a cute name.

I bring this up cause even now, there is no mention of X anywhere on the original image. It's on my DA, but I don't even think I mentioned that there either. It's just my poor OC, beside herself that she got knocked up.. lol, also part of the wtf is how does that happen, but yah. I think back then we just figured "SCIENCE!!" and left it at that. Anyhow... I need to stop being so scared. I'm going to try to not be and get used to doodle my boy and not choke. -_- this is gonna be beyond hard.... but there's also the continuation of my memories of WAS, too. 

Those stories... my memories.. I refuse to let those die. That stupid RP club stopped me from committing suicide. If I didn't have a literal X hovering over me during some pretty emotional times in my life, I probably wouldn't be here. So, since X has saved my life in more ways than one, I will try, damnit. I will do my best. For today, a sketch of the next WAS memory comic. Our X had an apple tree and greenhouse. His special spot, and only people REALLY FREAKING IMPORTANT got to go there with him. Our Dr. Cain, Zero.. our Roll.. people like that.

Then I got attacked by another member- he literally tried to rape my character, cause I didn't want to date him. I got a few friends to come in and make him stop, but they told our X, despite my begging them not to. So here was 16 year old me, whom already, in case nobody was aware, I am an incest survivor, so I already had bad experiences in being taken advantage of.. this is a character I have a huge crush on and he found our someone else on the team tried to rape me????? Omfg. Now, I had to go to that tree. I was playing a cat-and-mouse game avoiding our X for a day before he finally cornered me and made me come to the tree with him to talk about what had happened.

I wanted to die, y'all. This started a nearly 2-week long stint. Once our X found out that? I had to deal with him checking in with me DAILY for nearly 2 weeks. It got to the point where I went to school teachers to ask for advise on what to talk about with "X", no joke. I didn't know anything about the person role-playing as X, and when they were on, they were strictly IC as X. There was no talking to his player... I was talking to the character, about some pretty heavy stuff, weather I liked it or not. There was even one convo I remember.. Our X had found out my schedule pretty fast- and was in the habit of IMing me (this was on AOL back in like, 96, 97) as soon as I got online after school. He would often ask what I had for my after school snack. I responded once, eh, cheese filled ravioli.. something. "X" again, completely and utterly IC, responds with "That's sounds good! Just a sub tank for me today, I'm afraid..." Again, I never spoke to his player. His player stayed IC no matter what. This of course made me go "#^@%#%##!!!!!!" mentally but I digress..

I think the biggest lesson "X" taught me during all of that, was it's ok to ask for help. I'm not going to be able to handle everything on my own, and the biggest one, during that especially, was it's NOT ok for people to take advantage of me. You take into consideration I was only 16-17 at that time, and in an abusive household and living with my abusers, and having my childhood hero telling me this? This is why he's so freaking important to me. This challenge will be hard, but I will see it through. I owe him that much, in the very least.

[juicy-cookie]

Through The Valley - Chapter 18

AO3 Link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10075958/chapters/29103918

Tags: @luke-vaughn @embracetheapocalypsewithme @kinkozan @lupienne @theblack-wolf @lovingzombiechaos @jmackie1983 @dragonracer @miiraal @negans-network

Pairing: Negan X OFC

Chapter Summary: Something to Fear

A big thanks to @originalwinchestervamp for having a look at this chapter and giving me feedback!

Word Count: 4780

A/N: With this chapter, we arrive in the comics. Issue 97 to be exact. I will try to keep the story as canon as possible, but I might have to change some details. I’m very grateful for your reviews and I’d love to read what you thought of this chapter.

 I, I will be king

And you, you will be queen

Though nothing, will drive them away

We can beat them, just for one day

We can be heroes, just for one day

  Negan didn’t know when the last time was that he had felt this way. Content. Not since the world had ended. Excited, yes. Satisfied. But truly content, without any problems bothering him, without any potential conflicts haunting the back of his mind? If he thought long and hard, he could think of a time right after getting married, when he had been perfectly happy. But that had soon turned to shit, too, after he and Lucille had bought the house and their lives had been overrun with mortgages, job troubles and both their unfulfilled desire for children.

It wasn’t perfect by any means right now. There was still the threat of the undead fuckers outside. But that didn’t trouble him all that much. Those were predictable and could usually be dealt with with one swing of his trusted bat.

There was apparently still some conflict with the Hilltop. But he had given instructions to Andrei and Jax to be passed on to Rob. They were outside right now, with Gavin and Marv, being seen off by Lilly and Connor. Rob and the others at the outpost were supposed to take one of the Hilltop’s runners hostage until they could come up with a satisfying tribute. Nothing too brutal, just a small additional fee to show them that they had to work for the Saviors’ protection. Negan actually didn’t care that much for their supplies, what with the Sanctuary’s greenhouses having yielded enough crops to be canned for the upcoming winter. But rules were rules and the rules kept them alive.

The only thing that was keeping his current situation from being perfect was the fact that his testicles were about to fall off soon. He could feel it. Spending so much time with Lilly, working out with her, having her by his side while running the Sanctuary, he couldn’t remember wanting anything, or anyone, so much in his entire life. And he didn’t have the option of emptying into one of his wives anymore. Not that he wanted to, of course.

Lilly had made incredible progress, both physically and mentally. She had taken up her bow again and spent hours outside every day training so she could go hunting again. Not that he would let her any time soon, at least not alone. The fear of something happening to her again was still too strong.

She was back to being his second-in-command and it almost felt as if she had never left. She had even told him that her sleep had improved and she had given credit to both their workouts and their daily talks.

He had learned a lot about her in the past couple of weeks. That she loved fantasy novels and Italian food and the smell of a rainy forest and that her dad had taught her how to drive a tractor when she was twelve. He had told her about his favorite kids at his job and about his man cave at home and how he had found solace in the arms of another woman when Lucille had become too sad to sleep with him after being told that they would never have children. Lilly had frowned at that, but any other sign of disapproval had been kept to herself and for that he was eternally grateful.

But it all contributed to the ridiculous level of his sexual frustration. The touches, the laughter and the trust they shared every day had made him about ready to pop. But he had sworn to himself that he would wait for her to make the first move this time. She had to heal and she had to be absolutely sure that she wanted this. Wanted him.

“Hey, scoot your big ass over a little!”

Negan looked up to the object of his musings. He had been so deep in thoughts that he hadn’t noticed Lilly coming back inside to stand next to the rec room couch that he was, admittedly, occupying in its entirety.

“Who are you calling a big ass?” He frowned, but made room for her and spread out his arms.

“You’re right. Sorry. You don’t have an ass.”

“What?!” He clutched his chest in fake outrage. “You are really hurting my fucking feelings, baby.”

“Aww, poor Negan.” Lilly stroked his cheek and then squealed when he pretended to take a bite out of her hand.

“Just so you know, all the mass that should have gone into my ass went into my dick instead.” He could feel more than see the people around him rolling their eyes. He didn’t give a shit. All he cared about was the woman in front of him leaning into him in a fit of giggles. It made the corners of her eyes crease ever so slightly and it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

He lowered his arm to wrap it her around her, but when he grasped her shoulder he audibly and visibly winced. Lilly immediately stopped laughing and looked at him concerned.

“What's wrong?”

“Nothing. Just tendonitis or some shit in my wrist.”

Lilly got up and walked to one of the cupboards surrounding the seating area to get a first aid kit. She sat back down next to him, took out a bandage and proceeded to wrap it firmly around his wrist.

“Thanks. All that fucking weight lifting. It probably doesn't help that I jack off at least twice a day.” Lilly snorted while the rest of his lieutenants rolled their eyes so far back, they looked like biters for a moment. Laura even groaned.

“You masturbate with your left hand? Aren't you right-handed?” Lilly asked while taping off the bandage.

“I like to spice things up. It feels more foreign with your left hand. Almost like someone else is doing it.” He winked at her and rolled his wrist around a couple of times to see if it was comfortable.

“A true connoisseur,” Lilly chuckled and repacked the first aid kid to put it away again.

“Did Andrei say when they're going to be back from the outpost? We still need to make that tour before the first snow hits.” Dwight tried to change the subject.

“About three days. Jax wants to visit every outpost while they're already on the road. See if there's more to repair.” Lilly sat back against Negan’s chest with her feet propped up on the coffee table.

“Did you make sure to tell him at least another seven times to wear his helmet?” Laura teased. Lilly’s neurosis when it came to motorcycle safety was legendary by now.

She stuck out her tongue at her friend. “You can never be too careful.”

Negan lost track of their conversation while he played with Lilly’s hair, his knuckles brushing over the nape of her neck occasionally. He merely noticed that she was much more affectionate than usual when she laid a hand on his thigh and pressed into him more. He smiled, wishing that things could always be this way.

The day was slow and exceptionally lazy. There wasn't much to do in terms of organization and so Negan and his lieutenants spent the morning playing ping pong, or talking, or reading.

“And fucking game point! Babe, did you see that?” Negan grinned and walked over to where Lilly was sitting on a table next to Laura, both their feet on the bench below. “I motherfucking destroyed him.”

“Yeah, well done. I’m so proud of you.”

“Do I detect a flicker of sarcasm here?” He kneeled on the bench between her legs and pouted at her, which was apparently the cue for Laura to scoff and flee to where Seth and some others were playing cards.

“Sorry. You know I’m not a huge fan of competitive sports.”

“Well, I guess nobody’s fucking perfect. Except for me, of course.” He winked and Lilly chuckled. He happily noticed that she didn’t protest. “So what are you up to for the rest of the day?”

“Well, I thought about doing some reading or maybe a nap. But my room is so cold.”

“Remember to ask Marv to have a look at that fucking stove when he gets back.”

“Yeah, I will.” She took his hands and looked up at him, blushing ever so slightly. “I was thinking… your room has this huge fireplace and I noticed in the past that I sleep much better with you around. So, maybe I could sleep over at your place tonight? My ribs are totally fine now, by the way. Good as new.”

Negan gaped at her for a moment and gripped her hands a little harder without even noticing. “I… uhm… Yes! Yes, of fucking course.” A wave of excitement rushed through his body and straight to his groin.

Lilly smiled sweetly at him and they were both so busy looking into each other's eyes that they didn’t notice the commotion and the murmur going through the cafeteria at first.

“Andrei is back.”

Negan stood and frowned slightly. Somehow, the statement sounded wrong, somewhere deep inside of him. Andrei and the others had only just left this morning. Why were they back already?

He felt Lilly standing up slowly beside him. Absentmindedly, he reached for Lucille. The doors opened and Andrei staggered in. He was white as a sheet, his eyes wide, his whole body shaking. He found Negan and Lilly and ran over the metal catwalk and down into the cafeteria where they met him. Lilly put a hand on Andrei’s shoulder, who took a raspy breath before looking first at her and then at Negan.

“We were attacked.”

“What do you mean, attacked?” Negan asked and then held back Lilly who had already turned to run upstairs and out the door, no doubt to get to a car.

“We saw this van driving between the western outpost and DC. With the tributes being so light lately we thought we’d stop them and take their shit.”

“You stopped some stranger’s car in the middle of fucking nowhere to steal whatever the fuck they had on them?” Negan felt the rage boiling deep inside of him, but he was busy trying to keep a level head while wrestling a panicking Lilly with one hand.

“I didn’t want this winter to be such a fucking disaster as the last one!”

“Shut the fuck up Andrei with your piss poor fucking decision making skills. Jesus fuck!”

“What happened when you stopped them? Where are the others?” Connor asked from next to Lilly. He had taken her other arm to keep her from running off.

Andrei looked as if he was close to crying. “They just opened fire at us. I couldn’t do anything…”

Connor and Lilly both jerked themselves free and were up the stairs in mere seconds, with Laura and Seth at their heels. Negan now gripped Andrei by his arm, more out of concern that he might break down than out of anger. Hauling both of them up to the catwalk and then outside, he yelled instructions to the people around him.

“Seth, get the cars! Two plus the truck. Dwight, take the radio and go ahead to the western outpost. Get Rob and ten others. Big guys. Weapons, too. Carson, same here. Don’t forget the radios. You’ve got five fucking minutes and then we’ll roll out. Go!”

The courtyard fell into a flurry of activity with cars being moved and people yelling instructions and then Negan was in a car with Lilly next to him in the passenger seat and Connor in the back. They followed Seth, Laura and Andrei who were leading the way. The truck with a small army of Saviors was behind them, all on their way to where someone had attacked four of their own, seemingly out of nowhere.

Lilly held his right hand in a vice grip, her whole body tense as if she was about to jump out of the moving car any second.

“Jax will be fine,” Connor mumbled from the back seat.

“We’ll see when we fucking get there.”

“How long?”

“About an hour.”

Lilly kept quiet, staring straight ahead with her jaw set and her fingernails boring painfully into his palm. Negan didn’t care. It distracted him from the thoughts running wild in his head. Outside, the countryside was replaced by the outskirts of Washington, where the buildings and the undead were more numerous, only to go back to small towns and empty streets in between fields.

Soon, their silent trip came to an end in a suburban street lined with trees. The three of them jumped out of the car and met up with Seth, Laura and Andrei. Negan looked around to take in the situation. Three motorcycles were on their sides on the ground. Two biters were crouching over two figures and a third one was lying further back. Seth drew his knife to take care of the undead and Negan stepped forward to take a closer look at the bodies. The first one was large enough that he could tell that it was Marv, even with his face having been eaten. The second was Gavin, who stared unblinking towards the sky, his eyes as wide open as his ribcage.

Negan nodded grimly to Seth who stepped towards the bodies, knife in hand. The Saviors that had come in the truck formed a circle around the motorcycles. He wanted to tell them to look out for any signs of more undead or even living, when the sound of Lilly running and crying out made him spun around.

“No! No no no no no! Jax!” She dropped to her knees beside the third person lying in a pool of their own blood and tried taking of their helmet. Negan made his way towards her, but Connor was faster and joined her on Jax’s other side, helping her freeing his head. Negan got down on one knee next to Lilly, one hand on his knife in case he had already turned. Unlike the other two, his body didn’t bear any signs of having served as lunch for the biters. His eyes were clear and moving between Lilly and Connor when they finally took off his helmet.

“I… they…” Jax’s voice was too weak and it ended in a sickening gurgle.

“Shhhh.” Lilly stroked his forehead and over his hair. “Don’t talk now. Keep your strength. We’re gonna get you out of here and back home to Fisher.” She turned her head to address Seth and Dwight. Negan hadn’t noticed him and the outpost guys arriving. “Go get a stretcher. Or a blanket. Something to transport him.”

But Seth and Dwight merely looked at each other and then at Negan, their faces grim. Negan closed his eyes for a moment and gently put his hand on Lilly’s shoulder while she looked back down at Jax. His face was gray, almost devoid of all life. Negan saw him holding his left side, but he was already too weak to stem the blood seeping out of the wound there. Connor noticed and slipped his hand into Jax’s, tears streaming down his face.

Jax smiled at his lover for a moment before slowly turning back to Lilly.

“Please,” he whispered.

“No,” Lilly sobbed, “No, you can do this Jax. You’ll be fine. Please! Please don’t leave me.”

“You promised.”

“No…” she wailed again, her hand still in his hair.

“Please,” his lips formed the word again, but no sound came from him anymore.

Negan took out his knife, gently grabbed Lilly’s free hand and handed it to her. Her whole body was heaving with sobs as she bent over Jax and placed a kiss on his forehead. Negan heard her whispering a soft “I love you” before her hand found his and she held onto him as if he was a lifeline. Negan squeezed and hoped he didn’t hurt her, but he didn’t know how else to be there for her right now.

Lilly placed the knife over one of Jax’s now closed eyes. Connor turned his face away. A cry, a squelch and the knife fell to the ground.

Lilly’s shoulders were shaking and she cried out like a wounded animal. She seemed to be in so much pain that it hurt Negan, too. She spun around and he caught her in his arms, holding her tight and stroking her back, letting her sob into the red scarf she had given him almost a year ago.

Seth and Laura both held Connor and Negan saw that all of his Saviors looked stricken, if they weren’t crying openly.

He looked around for Andrei, who seemed close to fainting.

“Tell me what the fuck happened here,” Negan demanded, still trying to keep Lilly from falling apart.

“Like I said, boss, we were on our way to the outpost and saw them coming from a distance and decided to have a look. Jax didn’t want to at first, but Gavin and Marv were all for it. God, I’m so sorry. Please, Lilly, I didn’t-”

“You stop your fucking blubbering right now!” Negan didn’t want to raise his voice too much with Lilly still clutching at his shirt, crying into his chest. But he was quickly losing his patience with his scout. Andrei took a couple of steadying breaths before he continued.

“Right. Okay. Sorry, I mean, right… We stopped their van and told them to give us their stuff and they, uhm… oh yeah, they mentioned something about the Hilltop? How they were going to protect the Hilltop from now on?”

“If they had the fucking firepower to do this, they ain’t from the fucking Hilltop.”

“That’s what I told them. And then they just opened fire. Shot Gavin and Marv right through the head. And Jax, well… he was wearing his helmet, so I guess they aimed for the stomach.”

“Why the fuck did they leave you alive?”

“To give you a message. That they would protect the Hilltop from now on. That we won’t get anything from them anymore. And that they offer us the same deal… their protection in exchange for half of our supplies.”

Negan couldn’t help but laugh at that. He felt like the whole world had gone mad. Again.

“And who, pray tell, were these fucking fuckers who so graciously offered to save our community from the fucking undead?”

“That’s the thing, Negan, I don’t know. The guy didn’t give me his name.”

“Think real fucking hard, Andrei. Anything that could help us find these assholes. Looks, weapons, license plates, anything?”

“Okay, well there were three of them. I mean, there might have been more inside the van, but-”

“So three fuckers that shot at you. What else?”

“One guy and two women. And only one of them shot at us. The other had some kind of sword? Oh and she was black. And... oh yeah! The guy was missing a hand.”

Negan suddenly realized that Lilly had stopped crying and had become very still in his arms. She raised her head and all tears were gone from her face as she stared into the distance somewhere behind Negan, her eyes unblinking.

“Rick Grimes.”

Negan took her face into his hands and tried to meet her gaze. The name rang a bell somewhere in his subconscious.

“Lil…?”

She blinked and then looked at him. Her eyes and nostrils were wide as if she was about to scream. Before Negan could say anything, she had jumped up. She leaned over Seth, took the keys that were dangling from his jeans pocket and broke into a run towards the cars.

Negan scrambled to his feet as fast as he could and went after her. Lilly had just torn open the car door when he caught up with her and slammed it back shut. He wrangled the keys from her and threw them to the nearest Savior. She turned around and tried to duck away, but he grasped her shoulders and sent her back crashing into the car. She didn’t even wince, but started to struggle against his grip.

“Let me go!”

“No.”

“LET ME GO NEGAN! He killed them! They killed them all! I’m gonna kill them! I’m gonna…”

All her fighting stopped and she would have sank to the ground if Negan hadn’t caught her in his arms. She sobbed and coughed and trembled in his arms for what felt like hours. He merely held her again until she calmed down and wrapped her arms around his waist.

“Where are they, Lilly?”

“Alexandria. I can show you.”

“Dwight? Go get us a fucking map!”

Negan gently untangled himself from Lilly and took her face between his hands again. She looked up at him with red eyes and tears and snot running down her nose, but she didn’t seem to care and neither did he.

“Baby, I know you want to tear their fucking walls down right fucking now and kill every single one of those motherfuckers. But I can’t let you do that. You understand that, right?”

She sniffed and nodded. Another tear ran down her cheek. He caught it with his thumb and smiled down at her.

“That’s my girl. I promise that we’ll make them fucking pay for what they’ve done. But we need to be fucking smart about it. You told me that they’re big and that this Rick fucker ain’t like Gregory or Ezekiel. So I need you to tell me everything. Everything you know, about their community, their defenses, their habits. Who needs to go first? Who is dangerous? Who do I need to kill to fucking break them.”

She frowned slightly at that and Negan could almost see the gears turning in her head.

“You won’t wipe them out,” she whispered. It wasn’t a question so much as a statement. He hoped that she knew him well enough by now to understand.

“No.”

“And you won’t kill Rick.”

“No, Lilly.”

“Because you want to make him suffer?”

“That, too. I’m gonna take something from him. To show him who he fucked with. But if they’re as capable as you told me… then we can use that to our advantage. They’re too big to attack, right? I know it’s fucking hard for you to think clearly right now, but please try. Think about it, Lil.”

She stared at the zipper of his leather jacket for a while before she shook her head slightly as if to let go of something. Then she closed her eyes tightly for a moment and cleared her throat.

“They have walls. Huge metal walls, reinforced with steel beams. They can be manned in all directions. You can’t tear them down with a car. The only way in or out is through the gate. It’s guarded at all times. They have water and electricity and weapons and probably more than enough supplies. There’s no way to lay siege to them.”

Dwight stepped forward at that, a map in his hand. Seth, Laura and Connor joined them, the latter still looking shaken, but all of them determined.

“What about the surroundings? Are there any places where we could watch them?” Dwight asked.

“It’s a suburban place. The gate opens to some shops, a school and there’s a tower from where you can overlook the area. But they were constantly expanding. I don’t think they would relocate the gate, but I can’t say for sure how the community layout is right now. Let me see that map.”

They opened the map over the hood of the car and positioned themselves around it with Lilly in the middle. It was of an area south of DC. Negan vaguely remembered wondering why they had never sent scavenging teams there, but now he realized that Lilly had wanted to keep the Saviors away from Alexandria.

“Here. Someone give me a pen.” She pointed at a cluster of houses in the western part of the town. Seth handed her a pen and she circled it. “The gate is here. And there’s the school,” she marked it with an S, “with lots of hiding spots. The tower is across from it.”

“I’m gonna take a team there. Watch them, maybe scare them a bit.” Dwight’s grin was made even nastier by the scar stretching over the left side of his face. “Seth, you in?”

“Fuck yeah! They’re gonna rue the day they decided to fuck with us. Anyone we need to look out for, Lil?”

Lilly bit her lip in concentration. “There’s one guy. Ginger, huge, former military. Be careful around him.”

“Alright, let’s make one thing perfectly fucking clear. You just go there to watch those fuckers and then report back to the Sanctuary. I know you’re all fucking bloodthirsty after this shitshow here, but let’s just pretend for one fucking second that we’re reasonable fucking human beings and not rabid fucking dogs and calm. the fuck. down.”

“They killed Jax, Negan. And Marv. And Gavin.”

“And they will kill more of us if we don’t go about this at least a little fucking levelheaded. I’m not gonna lose any more people to these psychos if I can fucking help it.”

“Lilly, what do you say about all this?” Seth turned to Lilly, who wrapped her arms around herself and frowned. Fresh tears ran down her cheeks. Negan was sure that it would take some time until she would stop crying.

“Negan is right. Rick WILL fight back. And as much as I want to see his head on a pike, his people would stop at nothing to avenge him. He’s a tough bastard. He once ripped out a guy’s throat with his bare teeth for threatening his son.”

“He’s got a kid? Interesting…” Negan mused.

“Yeah, but you won’t touch him!”

“Of course not. What the fuck do you take me for, some fucking monster?”

“Okay, okay,” Seth intervened before tempers could flare too high. They were all on edge and ready to fight, no matter with whom. “What about you, Connor?”

“Jax wouldn’t have wanted us to start a massacre. And I want those bastards to suffer for what they’ve done to him. Can’t possibly do that if they’re dead, now can you?”

“So you want us to spy on them and then what?” Dwight still seemed unconvinced.

“And then tell us when they leave their compound again. I’m gonna make that prick my personal bitch, but we need to make an example out of one of them. Show them who’s the King Dick Motherfucker around here.”

“I’ll think of someone. Someone whose death will make an impact. Someone worthy of Lucille.” Lilly’s eyes were full of steel when they found Negan’s.

“And we’ll come up with a plan while you do that.” Laura put an arm around Lilly’s shoulders and squeezed her friend tightly. “They won’t know what hit ‘em.”

The Saviors got busy loading up the bikes and bodies and splitting up into teams. Lilly and Negan watched together as Dwight and Seth said their goodbyes and departed for Alexandria with their men. He grabbed her hand and intertwined his fingers with hers.

“I know you’re fucking broken right now. I just want you to know that I’m here. And I’m not gonna go anywhere. We’re gonna fucking fuck these fuckers up. Together.”

“I’m not broken.” She turned to him and wrapped her arm around his waist. “But you have to promise me that you’re gonna throw Rick into the mud and keep him there. He can’t get up ever again, or we won’t survive this.”

“I fucking promise, Lilly.”

He held her and kissed the top of her head, hoping that she wouldn’t notice his heart racing as if it wanted to jump out of his chest. This wasn’t the time to show any weaknesses.

Not when he was about to face Rick motherfucking Grimes.