#Spiritual Direction

[bitter-bats-cult-of-the-moon]

What is Toxic Spirituality?

Spirituality is the practice of getting to know yourself better on a deeper level and learning about the world around you.

While this can provide physical, mental, and emotional health benefits, it can also take a turn for the worse. Sometimes spirituality can push harmful messages, toxic positivity, judgment, gaslighting, and cultish behavior.

Nine Toxic Spirituality Habits

1.   Spiritual Bypassing and Toxic Positivity

Spiritual bypassing is when you use spiritual concepts to avoid certain emotions or situations in your life. 

Toxic positivity is when you believe you need to be always positive to gain proper manifestation of your desires.

Suppressing emotions can lead to a buildup of unprocessed thoughts dependent on circumstances, and eventually you will mentally implode.

2.   Spiritual Narcissism

Spiritual narcissism is the belief that your spirituality makes you better than others. It’s the Us vs. Them mentality.  

The stronger your ego identifies with a specific belief the more difficult it will be to see any issues.

3.   Idolizing Spiritual Teachers 

The best teachers are the ones that help connect you to your inner self. Their goal is to act as a guide more so rather than be the ultimate truth. 

The trouble idolizing spiritual mentors is that there will be a point you’re going to disagree, and it will cause cognitive dissonance if you see them for more than they are.

4.   Superstitions and Attachment 

If you heavily rely on spiritual practices, items, and rituals to exist in the world and become solely dependent about superstitious beliefs linked to any of them, you are diminishing yourself.

You don’t need crystals to protect yourself.

You don’t need the wand to draw energy.

You don’t need the cauldron to burn incense or make potions. Although, even I can admit having one makes things more interesting.

5.   Hyper Discipline

I see this a lot. There are those that talk about the importance of discipline in spirituality. Likewise, I see others talk up the importance of flexibility.

Spirituality is a personal experience. If disciplined daily practices or rigid rituals work for you, then great, but if it feels forced reconsider things.

6.   Lack of Discernment

Not every spiritual practice will be right for you. Not everything will resonate. Not every metaphysical concept will ring truth. That’s good. It’s healthy to ask questions and think for yourself.

If you accept without question, you’re allowing yourself to be programmed by external forces becoming conditioned.

7.   Clinging to Truth

What’s true for you may not be true for someone else, and what was true for you last year may no longer be true for you today. 

Our beliefs can change over time as we learn and experience different facets to spirituality. Fighting for the word of truth or standing behind a specific religion promoting acts of war is an act of blasphemy. In that regard, belief and religious culture do not always coincide.

8.   Emotional Hypochondria

It’s possible to become attached to your own healing, making you feel the need to become a better, and better version of yourself.

Always overanalyzing everything will lead to an emotional burnout, and you will be hyper aware of every single feeling.  You will become self-depreciating, and you will be running in a circle like a silly hamster in its wheel going nowhere.

9.   Manic Manifesting

Shut up about manifestation.  I’m tired. It’s everywhere.  Constantly visualizing your desires, parroting affirmations, and trying to control every single frequency makes it feel manic.

Thinking on what you don’t have will make you see less of what you do have, and it is like beating yourself up mentally every day for those things you do not have.

Thinking on it without action is an obsession. The secret was a fun concept for a book, but unless you put it into actual action. There will be no change, Laws of physics, every action has a reaction. Because thinking is more like potential energy, but that still needs an activator. No one is going to miraculously fix things for you. You can do worksheets on what you want every day for the rest of your life, but at the end of your life you will have nothing you want except a pile of worksheets with your hopes and dreams that never happened.        

Diminishing Toxic Spirituality

If you’ve been participating in toxic spirituality, own it and grow from it. Be mindful of your intentions, ask questions, and navigate your experiences.

When something isn’t working you will know it, when you realize that something is wrong, it may have already set you back. When something keeps replaying in your mind, maybe that’s an area to work on. Or delve deeper, but with an analytical mind, rather than one that accepts everything. It’s like eating at a buffet. You can see the chicken is green, you can smell its rancid. But the person with you says it’s good. Are you going to take that at face value and trust them, or make your own choice?

Correct motivations for spirituality, belonging to a group is great. They help people feel connected, and it gives joy to be able to connect. While it is not for everyone, some people see the appeal in it, but as a result can become absorbed into the group and lose their individuality. Their need to be accepted can drive them to poor decision making, at the expense of their autonomy due to peer pressure.

Some go into practice to fuel their ego or have something unique and quirky to talk about. If it’s a fad, it probably isn’t the best idea. If you must run around yelling to your bullies at school, I'm a witch I will curse you. That is likely not the right reason to delve into a spiritual journey. While it may be doing it for your own sense of internal control over an aspect of your life, the journey becomes more about what you have against others, rather than delving within yourself and finding yourself.

Money, Power, Quick fixes. Spirituality and religions offer seemingly quick results with fake promises. Love spells, Churches, Community support. While in theory sounds too good to believe. Often the promises made by various people, groups, and sectors of religion can be very appealing; at times it is used for the profit of the people providing the services.

You would be surprised how many people offer snake oil, or a djinn in a ring for money. To give you all you want. If you are looking for your life to magically be alright, please remember this isn’t a modern fairytale.

Happy endings happen in movies because they can’t fit it all into an 80-minute run. There's character development, there’s ups downs, trials and moments of success and happiness. Without those moments, we don’t really discover who we are. We are more of a hollow once off character in a movie playing a role. We do not find us; we do not create... an Us in such a short time.

It’s best to be yourself, and not part of some collective.

The spiritual journey is yours so do it for yourself.

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

'What does it mean to be "spiritual?" It means putting your feet on the ground. It means finding stillness, not only when you sit, but when you stand, and walk, and whirl. It means finding silence, not only between your thoughts, but in your words, in your laughter, in your tears. It means that you do not call yourself a "teacher." Yet you teach with your Being.'

~ John Butler

[Thanks to Ian Sanders]

[jameslmartello]

Father Gabriele Amorth, pray for us +

[apenitentialprayer]

Fasting can so easily be done with the spirit of pride. And if we think that observing Jesus' command —"do not let your left hand know what your right is doing (Mt 6:3 [cf. 6:16-18])— means never telling anyone anything about our fasting we are mistaken. For the most dangerous audience for spiritual pride is ourselves. For this reason, sharing our Lenten program with someone who knows us well (like a spouse, a close friend or relative, a spiritual advisor), and letting them express their honest opinion about it, and thus being ready to reconsider it — this is a sign of a healthy Lenten fast, or a practice designed to take us out of ourselves, to relativize our wills, and so expand our hearts to embrace the fully cosmic plan of God revealed at Easter. We might grow in some virtue (or at least lose some weight) by giving up sweets for Lent. But, then again, we'll likely grow in many virtues we really need if we submit our program to the judgment of another, and humbly ready ourselves to hear something like, "Oh, that's nice, but perhaps what you might really want to work on this Lent is something like…"

- Fr. John Bayer, O. Cist (Fasting in the Rule of St. Benedict During Lent). Bolded emphases added.

[patron-saint-of-lesbeans]

I am meeting with a spiritual director for the first time tomorrow. Please pray for me.

[minotaurmerkaba]

[grandpasessions]

However, if we are supposed to take language’s formative and de-formative power seriously, then the parapraxis [slips or slurs of the tongue] becomes the symptom of a non-experienced experience or an experienced non-experience. Usually, what we call a psychological symptom is not a problem because we experience it. Instead, symptoms are a problem precisely because we typically do not experience them. Symptoms only present themselves in the disturbances of the structures of our life. In other words, we know something is off but do not usually know what. Alternatively, if we do know what the problem is, we do not know or experience the whole problem and tend to want to go back to ignoring what is not fully experienced.

The Direction of Desire Mark Gerard Murphy

[santmat]

Gospel of Thomas Studies - Message and Key Verses: Need For A Living One, Not Just Old Scriptures

52. His Disciples said to him: Twenty-four prophets preached in Israel, and they all spoke of you. He said to them: "You have ignored the Living One who is in your presence and you have spoken only of the dead."

59. Jesus said: "Look to the Living-One while you are alive, otherwise, you might die and seek to see him and will be unable to find him."

5. Know what is in front of your face and what is hidden from you will be revealed to you. For there is nothing hidden that will not be revealed.

(108) Yeshua said, Whoever drinks from my mouth will become like me. I myself shall become that person, and the hidden things will be revealed to that one.

What the Living Master Reveals to the Student

17. The Master says: I will give to you what eye has not seen, what ear has not heard, what hand has not touched, and what has not occurred to the mind of man."

Or as Kabir Has Said

“It is the mercy of my true Guru that has made me to know the Unknown;

I have learned from Him how to

walk without feet,

to see without eyes,

to hear without ears,

to drink without mouth,

to fly without wings." 

After the Teacher Dies, All We Have Are Old Scriptures From Now On? Rather, There is Succession and a New Living One Appointed For the Next Generation in the Gospel of Thomas   

12) The students said to Yeshua, We know you will leave us. Who will be our leader?

Yeshua said to them, Wherever you are, seek out Yaakov the Just. For his sake heaven and earth came into being.

12. The Disciples said to Jesus: We know that you will go away from us. Who is it that will be our teacher?

Jesus said to them: Wherever you are, you will go to James the Righteous, for whose sake Heaven and Earth were made (came into being.)

For Whose Sake Heaven and Earth Came Into Being, an Old Hebrew Axiom of Wisdom Explained  

"Whenever feeling downcast, each person should vitally remember, 'For my sake, the entire world was created.'" (Baal Shem Tov)

The Baal Shem Tov is sort of the "Rumi" or "Kabir" of Kabbalah (Jewish mysticism), an example of a towering figure and great mystic of one of the great schools of spirituality. The ending part, "For my sake, the entire world was created", is a variation of an ancient axiom of wisdom. A version of it even turns up in saying twelve of the Gospel of THOMAS: "The students said to Yeshua, 'We know you will leave us. Who will be our leader?' Yeshua said to them, 'Wherever you are, seek out Yaakov the Just [James the Just]. For his sake heaven and earth came into being.'"

Martin Buber elaborates and expands on this axiom in a way that includes us all: “Every person should know and consider the fact that you, in the particular way that you are made, are unique in the world, and no one like you has ever been. For if someone like you had already been, there would be no reason for you to be in this world.” (Ten Rings: Hasidic Sayings, Martin Buber)

Here's a big picture view from the Sikh scriptures of India, the Adi Granth, Peace Lagoon translation: "It was for the sake of the God-conscious beings that our True Lord created this earth, and began this play of death and birth".

[fratresdei]

To My Body

Holy ash, animate dust

Stunted conductor, moonstruck cache

I smell the winter in your nose,

carry you from my bed,

scan the grass with your feet.

With your mouth I taste filth.

Your nerves keep me safe

            and keep me awake.

You are channel 

and dam.

You show me cliffs

and hang me from them.

The conception 

that splits.

The growth 

and growths.

You warm

          and burn.

You sprint, sway, float

break, infect, sprain.

You play, write, know,

block, stop, detain.

Another day.

Senses seen.

More skin to shed;

body to be.

By Rachel Parsons, Fratres Dei Spiritual Direction

[theflytingfox]

When you ask the Gods for some direction in your spiritual journey and all you hear is a quote from "Better off Dead" 😂

[alifeingrey]

Every time you get it wrong, you’re one step

Closer to getting it right.

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Yesterday would have been the 103rd birthday of the Jesuit priest and poet and social activist Daniel Berrigan, SJ. , who died at 94. His life was almost too full to be summarized. Instead here is a list of his

"Ten Commandments for the Long Haul," written in his typically prophetic and poetic style. (Thanks to Jim Forest for this photo of Dan.)

"Ten Commandments for the Long Haul"

1) Call on Jesus when all else fails. Call on Him when all else succeeds (except that never happens).

2) Don't be afraid to be afraid or appalled to be appalled. How do you think the trees feel these days, or the whales, or, for that matter, most humans?

3) Keep your soul to yourself. Soul is a possession worth paying for, they're growing rarer. Learn from monks, (and Sufis) they have secrets worth knowing.

4) About practically everything in the world, there's nothing you can do. This is Socratic wisdom. However, about of few things you can do something. Do it, with a good heart.

5) On a long drive, there's bound to be a dull stretch or two. Don't go anywhere with someone who expects you to be interesting all the time. And don't be hard on your fellow travelers. Try to smile after a coffee stop.

(And stop frequently to stretch)

6) Practically no one has the stomach to love you, if you don't love yourself. They just endure. So do you. (Most folks don’t love themselves enough. A good partner can remind you how)

7) About healing: The gospels tell us that this was Jesus' specialty and he was heard to say: "Take up your couch and walk!" your (deep gentle breaths help everything)

8) When traveling on an airplane, watch the movie, but don't use the earphones. Then you'll be able to see what's going on, but not understand what's happening, and so you'll feel right at home, little different then you do on the ground. (Ha ha ha)

9) Know that sometimes the only writing material you have is your own blood. (Hmmm)

10) Start with the impossible. Proceed calmly towards the improbable. No worry, there are at least five exits. (Have goals)

--Daniel Berrigan, SJ

"We pour our blood at G.E. to proclaim the sin of mass destruction. In the words of my brother Daniel, we are confronting the 'spiritually insane.' Confronting not with mere words but through symbols. Our blood confronts the irrational, makes megadeath concrete, summons the warmakers to their senses."

Philip Berrigan, Fighting the Lamb's War: Skirmishes with the American Empire

[via Leila L'Abate]

[apenitentialprayer]

A Catholic Principle of Conscience and Authority

When, then, Mr. Gladstone asks Catholics how they can obey the Queen and yet obey the Pope, since it may happen that the commands of the two authorities may clash, I answer that it is my rule, both to obey the one and obey the other, but that there is no rule in this world without exceptions, and if either the Pope or the Queen demanded of me an "Absolute Obedience," he or she would be transgressing the laws of human society. I give an absolute obedience to neither. Further, if ever this double allegiance pulled me in contrary ways […] then I should decide according to the particular case, which is beyond all rule, and must be decided on its own merits. I should look to see what theologians could do for me, what the Bishops and clergy around me, what my confessor; what friends whom I revered; and if, after all, I could not take their view of the matter, then I must rule myself by my own judgment and my own conscience. [...] Here, of course, it will be objected to me that I am, after all, having recourse to the Protestant doctrine of Private Judgment; not so; it is the Protestant doctrine that Private Judgment is our ordinary guide in religious matters, but I use it, in the case in question, in very extraordinary […] emergencies. [… H]ow else could private Catholics save their souls when there was a Pope and Anti-popes, each severally claiming their allegiance?

- Cardinal John Henry Newman (Certain Difficulties Felt By Anglicans in Catholic Teaching, Volume II, pages 243-245). Italics original, bolded emphases added.